#i just need two more episodes so i can complete this all omg
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planet-yeol · 5 months ago
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Early nights in white sheets with lace curtains Pompeii in the distance In a place that can make you change Fall in love again and again
Charli xcx - Everything is romantic (2024, Brat)
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stunie · 5 months ago
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what are ur headcanons for hoshina and kafka? not like fic hc but just like things you think fit them???? i've read up to volume two and just started watching it (lit watching episode 1 rn) and am curious
if we're talking nsfw tho, imho kafka would so do worship/praise. man's single and in his 30s. touches a titty and is just thankful for the opportunity DFLDJSFdsFJ
note: ok wait i haven’t done this type of lil paragraph thing in a while :’) but also omg euphie i’ve been dying to talk about them! (more specifically, hoshina has kinda been lurking in the back of my mind for a bit). also, if u wanted sfw ones too lemme know !! & btw i am also so so so excited for u to see a certain scene w hoshina <33
mdni. explicit smut (18+). 600 wc. f!reader
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SOSHIRO HOSHINA.
Hoshina is a huge tease. I mean this as … he’ll decide to give you your usual morning kiss a little more passionate than usual- just enough to get your stomach all hot, but he doesn’t do anything past that. Except throughout the day, you think it’s kind of weird that he keeps accidentally brushing against you, crotch coincidentally pushing against the swell of your ass multiple times, but it’s not hard enough for you to be able to tell if it was deliberate. By the end of the day, you’re practically throwing yourself on him, to which he responds with “Ah— you’re a needy one, aren’t you?”
Also likes risk to some extent. After filling you up with his cum, he has you pull up your panties and go about your day. The sight of you all feverish and awkwardly rubbing your thighs together to try and keep his cum from dripping down your thighs really gets him going, and he’s not against the idea of leaning down every now and then to whisper what he’s planning on doing to you tonight— straight into the shell of your ear, and sometimes he’ll give it a teasing bite before he’s right back to normal. Honestly just likes the process and feeling he gets from getting you all pent up and needy.
Of course, edging. Absolutely thrives on the sound of your voice begging him to stop teasing and just give you what you need. It’s even more exciting when he listens to you, except now he gives you too much— and now you’re whining that you can’t take it, to which he reminds you that it was your idea from the start.
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KAFKA HIBINO.
Has the nastiest breeding kink. I think he’d be weak from anything relating to this (i.e. is losing it when you’re soaked, when you squirt, when he cums on you, even the noises your sopping cunt makes from each thrust). Also drunk on the idea of just filling you to the brim, but more so because he just loves to watch his cum spill out of your cunt. Likes to dump it deep inside you, watch it leak out, then his finger comes to smear it with your own slick, pushing it back inside before he asks if you’re okay with another round.
Also … scratching. you asked him to put you in a mating press just once, and as soon as your nails first dug into his shoulders at the initial stretch, he knew it was over for him. He’s practically growling each time your nails rack up and down the muscles of his back, slamming his hips into you harder because he wants you to do that again and again. Also a sucker for when your legs wrap around him to pull him deeper inside you.
And i agree with the praise. I can picture him looming over you with a strong hand cradling your head against the crook of his neck. He’s completely breathless, but he’s still reminding you through a grunt every few minutes that you look so fucking good under him.
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goresuki · 10 months ago
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my thoughts on Charlastor and Alastor calling Charlie "the daughter he never had"
this will be a very long rant/vent/whatever. also, a kind of... agressive one. if u wanna read, read it, if u don't, don't, idc and idm. I don't know if some antis take things for convenience (that way) or if they really are naive, because the fact that a manipulative guy like Alastor, whose intentions are unknown, tells Charlie that he sees her as "the daughter he never had" DOES NOT SOUND as CUTE to me as many DO seem to think it does.
I don't know if they don't realize the relationship Charlie has with her parents and how Alastor seems to take advantage of her.
From the pilot we realize that Charlie has no contact with her mother. In the series it is established that they have not seen each other for 7 years.
The first episode JUST talks about Charlie having so called "daddy issues" as her father, Lucifer, is an absentee father.
Charlie appears to NOT have had a close relationship with ANY of the two for some time (or quite some time).
The only person Charlie has is Vaggie, to protect and care for her (here's why Vaggie is so "boring", as some people call her, as she is acting as a guide/parental figure for Charlie, even though their relationship is romantic).
Where am I going with these points? That I think it's complete nonsense for people to take super-literally what Alastor has said: "you're like the daughter I always wanted to have".
Isn't it convenient for the most feared overlord (not the strongest) to approach Charlie and find that she's not as vulnerable as he thought (because Vaggie is there)? Isn't it convenient for Alastor to make a very absolute polarity between Vaggie and him in the pilot, where Vaggie comes off as the "bitter one" and he as the "fun guy"? Isn't it convenient for Alastor to PROVE to Charlie over and over again that HE knows what SHE NEEDS by pulling his tricks? And, oh, surprise… Isn't it even more convenient that when Lucifer arrives, who has a lousy relationship with his daughter, Charlie, Alastor rubs it in his face that he is doing everything that he (Lucifer) is responsible for, and furthermore, hits him right where it hurts, manipulating Charlie so that she seriously BELIEVES that Alastor REALLY sees her that way, and thus making her STILL not have a GUIDE other than HIMSELF?
I'll make it simple for you. You know how narcissists work? They will make you believe that YOU are special, and at the same time, they will ALIENATE you from your loved ones to keep gaining whatever they need from you. Charlie is, literally, his supply.
Alastor is a psychopath and narcissist. Do you really think that someone who can't genuinely empathize and love is literally going to feel affection for a grown woman who is very naive and doesn't even have power over her kingdom because she is so immature? Don't you think it is VERY OBVIOUS that he has literally said to her face: "I'm going to manipulate you in my favor because thanks to me you have all these upgrades in your stupid hotel"?
Alastor hasn't as such made a deal with Charlie, but he's winning her over in HIS way.
And I don't know who's crazier: charlastor shippers like me, who don't give a damn about canon and want to enjoy shipping WITHOUT bothering ANYONE (and don't come out with the stupidity that it's a "proship". Proshipper doesn't even mean "problematic ship", it means that you are FOR shipping whatever you want, living and letting live, without HARASSING others. Let's remember that Hazbin Hotel characters DON'T. FUCKING. EXIST. Alastor is not going to come out of the screen to say: "omg, user, thanks for defending me from those evil shippers uwu", or Charlie to say: "thanks for defending me, you're so good, user…. You're such a good person". Pro: "in favor of", shipper: "shipper, ship", however you want to call it. Don't modify terms to suit yourselves because you can tell that many don't even know how suffixes and prefixes work in words. Neither Charlie nor Alastor are going to die because someone shipped them. They are FICTITIOUS characters. The FANON is not going to change the CANON. Learn to sepparate stuff, ffs. Go out and touch grass once in a while) or antis who put on a pedestal what Alastor said, believing it as a justification to ATTACK people in the fandom who shipped something different, according to them, "problematic".
There they do forget that Alastor is a manipulator, that he is a person with a LOT of arsenal to get his way. There they forget that he IS a guy Charlie should NOT trust. There it DOES count because IT CONVENIENTS THEM. That's when the canon MATTERS to them. There it COUNTS. It doesn't matter if Charlie gets hurt because of trusting Alastor, they only see what they want to see. If you guys are going to humanize this fucking characters, at least be a little bit logical. Got me? Remember what Viv said?: "ship whatever you want, JUST DON'T HARASS ANYONE". These people say: "fuck what Viv says", but on this occasion, since she DID say something convenient for them, it DOES matter what Viv says now, doesn't it? Hypocrites.
Charlie has no one beyond Alastor, and I don't remember where I read that theory, whether it was here or elsewhere, where they talked about Alastor looking for a way to alienate the hotel itself in one way or another. That's why he doesn't use very flashy technology (Vox can travel through the latest electronics, and the hotel has an old box TV), nor does he go out of his way to provide anything of good quality (like the video camera). The hotel has its own power supply (we see this when the blackout occurs during the song between Alastor and Vox).
Alastor DOES NOT WANT Charlie as his daughter, he's just taking advantage of her to get whatever he needs to get out of her.
Charlie doesn't even seem to know exactly how her powers work, and the only person who can teach her is Lucifer, her father. And if Lucifer is out of the equation, Alastor can do whatever he wants.
He's hit Lucifer right in the jugular, and Lucifer knows that all the power in the world can't make up for the wrong he did to Charlie.
Anyway, if a real anti thinks Charlastor is problematic because "AlASTor AlreADy SaiD hE sEES hEr As a DauGhtER," I remind them that they are not dealing with a character who cares about others beyond maintaining his own status, and ffs... they're not even real. KEEP SHIPPING. KEEP DRAWING. KEEP MAKING FANFICS. FUCK THESE PEOPLE THAT TRY TO HARASS YOU, FUCK THESE PEOPLE THAT TRY TO MAKE EVERYTHING "PURE" ON A SHOW ABOUT DEMONS AND HELL. FUCK THESE PEOPLE TRYING TO MAKE A FANDOM THEIR OWN FUCKING WAY BECAUSE THEY CAN'T HANDLE THERE'S A LOT OF DIFFERENT VIEWS. FUCK THEIR SAVIOR COMPLEX, JUST COMING AROUND WHEN IT'S ALL ABOUT CHARACTERS THAT DON'T EXIST, FEEL, OR THINK FOR THEMSELVES, BUT DISAPPEARS ANYTIME SOMEONE REAL COMES, HARASSING AND SENDING DEATH THREATS TO THEM. FUCK THESE PEOPLE, GIVING PSYCHOLOGICAL DIAGNOSES OVER A FUCKING TIKTOK VIDEO OTHER ANTI MADE JUST BASING THEIR THEORIES ON THEIR FIST RESULT ON GOOGLE. FUCK YALL, CAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON YOU WHINE ABOUT THIS FANDOM. JUST AS WE SAY IN SPANISH: O LA BEBES, O LA DERRAMAS.
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voltronisanobsession · 2 months ago
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Hii, sorry if you aren't willing to write for Voltron anymore. But I discovered your blog cause of the name, so I thought why not try? So here is one of my yandere ideas.
Yandere Voltron with isekaid reader? Basically, the reader was from real life, till they died. Either by truck-chan, or to a disease. But given their life was already very shitty, they didn't really care much. At least. Till the reader wakes up in their favorite show. Not as a main protagonist, or not even as a side character in one of the many episodes. Nah, the reader simply wakes up as an unknown character on some random planet. A planet that hasn't isn't a part of the Garla Empire, and reader paln to kept it that way. Eventually, Voltron starts to get on the move, and main characters meet reader. Except, reader doesn't really realized that they are now the main character of the story. So despite, being very perceptive of everyone and everything, they some how don't know that the characters are becoming yandere. One by one.
Again, sorry if you don't write about Voltron anymore, if you want you can ignore this completely. I just thought you might want to hear the idea. Don't let the Karens bite you, fight them off with the power of the shows you like if needed, and remember to take care.
Yandere Voltron with Isekaid!Reader
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OMG STOOOPPPP I LOVE THIS SMMM!!!! AND THIS BEING A YANDERE ASK?? It's like all those batfam fics i read, i'm so happy you thought of this. I will always write for voltron, don't worry pookie
This might be long, hope you enjoy😅
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A series of very much unfortunate events, readers life goes from crap to ok to crap again. Readers death was very short and brief on their end. In your world, Voltron was just a silly little show that you watched to get away from reality, a show you loved so dearly. So never did you imagine to be isakei'd into that same very world.
I like to think this was caused due to voltron traveling through different dimensions, like that one Altean reality. Kind of like an event that perfectly aligned, readers death and them escaping the reality.
Of course at first reader doesn't know where the HELL they are. Exploring this new place, its not hard to convince yourself you miraculously made it to heaven with how beautiful everything was. But it isn't long until they find the residents of this strange world. You live a good and easy life the weeks after your arrival as the townspeople openly accepted you into their world.
Reader has many similarities to these aliens, yet its very obvious that you take on a more humanoid appearance compared to them. Perhaps you share a similar skin tone, like green or blue. Maybe your eyes are the same shade as theirs. Despite this, your physical appearance is more human than alien without a doubt.
Reader only knows they're in the Voltron universe due to how often the townspeople talk about the Galra and Voltron rescuing imprisoned planets. Like I can imagine reader immediately jumping into someone's conversation to get more info, only for them to get weird looks
"Galra? Voltron?! Like from the show?? They're real?"
*Cue confused faces*
"Show? Um, I don't believe they're based off a show. They've been doing a lot of good for the universe!"
Its easy to put two and two together, but have no fear! Reader, being SMARTTT, already knows that they're in the Voltron universe. And if anything happens to the plot causing it to go astray from the og, it'll most likely have devastating consequences, so its a good thing that they're stuck on this unknown planet!
Especially one they don't remember ever being on the show!
Until some divine intervention wrecks that very idea one day with a giant mechanical lion falling from the sky.
You make sure to keep your distance from whatever paladin is staying in the village. It's not hard to do so with how many people lurk the streets to see a paladin of Voltron
But of course nothing ever goes Isekei'd!Reader's way when they bump into the one person they've been avoiding. It's as if time literally stops as they're eyes meet.
DUN DUUNNN! SHIRO! (My mans😍)
He's surprised to see someone almost like him after seeing all the townspeople's appearances. Shiro's seen some pretty wacky looking aliens so its almost like a slap in the face to find someone so human in the village.
Before he can even say anything though, you quite literally run away from him, leaving the black paladin in a state of confusion and curiosity. And since you're running AWAY from him, he figures you probably know the reason why his lion crash landed on this specific planet when it was fine before.
Cue to you trying to outrun him. Emphasis on TRYING. Cuz there's no way you could ever outrun him.
Once he catches you, its safe to say you're now permanently apart of their story. You, however, fail to realize that. It's hard to not reveal everything to the man in front of you, but some things may or may not have slipped out your mouth.
"HELLO STRANGE PALADIN! Welcome to our, um, planet? Uh, if you could get off of me Shiro, that would be amazing cuz I currently am freaking out right now!
"Keith is probably looking for you so get that black cat working and get outta here haha!"
With all of readers rambling and bad avoidance, Shiro can't shake off a growing feeling in him. Was it endearment? Pity, annoyance? Protectiveness? Possessiveness? Shaking the dark thought quickly, the man already knows you know more than what you're letting on.
"How do you know Keith?"
"Ummm we're cousins?" You're internally smacking yourself as the man in front of you raises an eyebrow.
SKIPPING SOME STUFF CUZ THIS IS GETTING A LITTLE LONG SO LETS JUMP TO THE YANDERE SHITTTTT😝😝
Being introduced to the team, they all seem to be drawn to you. Like there's some invisible force dragging them to your very being. It's sort of like an inner battle for them, allow themselves to get dragged into whatever this is willingly, or fight against it and fall harder into it.
Reader is kind of their unofficial prisoner, but not really a prisoner? So while it is very cool to meet some of their comfort characters, they accept the fact that they are now living in their world. They have no idea what the others are feeling or thinking, so they're kind of on their own from now on.
Some paladins I think that would willingly allow this divine obsession take place in their hearts are Shiro, Lance, and Allura.
Shiro was the first to find them, so it only makes sense that his obsession would take place first. He would mistake this new feeling as a need to protect. If reader is younger than him, then get used to being treated like a child. He doesn't mean to coddle you, but with how you seem to have ZERO survival skills and an air of childlike amazement at everything, he can't help but want to keep that to himself.
Lance is an easy going person, and very open to meeting new people. He's the easiest to fall into his yandere tendencies. He's basically a puppy whenever reader is around. He doesn't see anything wrong with his feelings ignoring how twisted they get the longer he's around them. You capture his attention as you don't necessarily push his overbearingness away like he's used to with everyone is. It's not like you can with how he's practically glued himself to your side.
Allura is a bit more on the umm condescending side? I don't want to say condescending, but she does feel like she has to help you learn space life. She enjoys teaching you about the ship and her planets history, of all the planets they've visited. Allura might actually see herself above you as she believes she holds more experience and knowledge of the universe than you do due to your previously mentioned childlike amazement. I think she might even see herself as your teacher, a master, and you her student. Little does she know that you are much familiar with the things she speaks of.
Now for the paladins that would be hesitant in the growing obsession, Hunk, Pidge and Keith.
Hunk is naturally a wary person when it comes to new people. Especially if he feels the vibes are off. I mean, here comes in a new person on the team that happens to know a little bit too much about them, about him! Like how do you know his name before meeting him? He's hesitant on being near you but seeing how kind you are to Lance of all people causes his a rift in his feelings. Maybe you aren't a bad person after all? He'd start growing a bit more protective of you each day the longer you guys hangout. Is this a good thing or a bad thing; only time will tell.
Pidge is standoffish to anyone who seems to know more than what they're letting on. She can tell it on you face when you look at her with a sense of familiarity despite her never having met you. She tries her best to block off the feelings of wanting to get closer to you, to hear you laugh at her jokes the same way you do with Lance and Hunk. There's not much she can do (does she even fight it anymore at this point) when you begin approaching her, mentioning some of her interests to continue talking to her. You seem to know exactly what to say to lower her guard, and she honestly doesn't know how to feel about that.
Keith is a double edged sword tbh. He'd be hesitant to get near you with these unfamiliar feelings flooding him. So he would either awkwardly get used to your prodding or he'd be quite aggressive with your presence. If we're talking about earlier season Keith, than I think he would most likely be the latter. He'd try interrogating you when know one's around. He'd try to get you to admit to something, anything to confirm his growing emotions are of suspicion instead of interest. He's immediately conflicted though once you turn emotionally at his barad of questions and accusations. He apologizes in a quiet voice and leaves, but one things for sure. He never wants you to look at him with the same fear you just did moments before.
Reader is just trying to get the plot to continue because hellooo?? The universe needs saving??
Reader knows EVERYTHING about the show and about the people they are now personally familiar with. However, they fail to realize the dark turn of events their presence brought to the team.
Sure they're acting a little unusual to how they normally would be on the show but it's not that big of a deal, right? Right?
Unrelated, but can you imagine how they would react to finding out reader is from another universe?? Even if you were to reassure them that you wouldn't be able to go back anyways, their paranoia would skyrocket.
If you were to die in their universe the same way you died in your universe, there's a chance that you'll get transported to another world! A world where you'll live without them. A world they'll never be able to reach. A world without them.
That thought alone terrifies them, so that's honestly when the true horror kicks in. BUT THAT'S FOR A DIFFERENT TIME!!!!
Everyone is wary of you at first, but with the strange emotions growing in them, they can't deny that your presence brings them an overwhelming sense of peace.
Their possessiveness will definitely set some alarms in your head but you stay in denial. You don’t want to believe that you may have, irreversibly, changed the Voltron universe.
A big question to think about is if you're gonna regret being isekai'd into this universe because they won't stay sweet for long.
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pookietv · 11 days ago
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encore! | arthur hill
literally got this ask like a couple hours but i had ideas for it so figured the dedication to the grind was worth it :)
been so long since i've written a smau, so i hope you enjoy! i may be slightly rusty
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liked by yourinstagram, arthurtv and 7,389 others
arthurnfhill: the kill hill tour has started better than i could have ever asked for :)
georgeclarkeey: who is that sexy man on stage??
↳ arthurnfhill: can't wait for you to be my sexy groupie at the london show
username3: KILL HILL IS GONNA BE SO GOOD!!!!
username4: can't wait for manchester omg
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liked by shannonlangdon, arthurnfhill and 6,093 more
yourusername: soooo what if i said i was impulsively dropping a song tomorrow night because i need to get the song off my chest and i can't wait until the supposed release date of next month ...?
it's called francis forever, and it's brought me a lot of peace to throw myself into completely making this song over the past few weeks
ANYWAYS here's a presave link if you care about that sort of thing,
hope you enjoy!
love, y/n.
jamesmarriott: we're getting SPOILED with another y/n banger
↳ yourusername: how do you know banger you haven't even heard yet ??? hmmm???
↳ jamesmarriott: you only drop bangers and thats FACTUAL
taliamar: UGH you are my icon
↳ yourusername: thats funny cause you're mine ???
username5: my heart is BREAKING at the caption
username6: omg if this is a breakup song i will do something violent.
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liked by chrismd, georgeclarkeey and 7383 others
arthurnfhill: i can't believe there is only four more shows of the kill hill tour - feels like i was waiting forever for the tour to come around and now its almost done just like that!
chrismd: london show night one and two rolling around real quick
↳ arthurnfhill: missed me in the flat?
↳ chrismd: all you did before you left was mope around so not much change
arthurtv: my goat
↳ arthurnfhill: can't wait to see the number one most popular arthur on famous birthdays in person again
username7: CAN'T WAIT FOR LONDON SHOWS
username8: manchester was AMAZING omg
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yourusername: as requested - my one night only london show! it was amazing to see so many of you guys there, makes this whole music thing so much more surreal :,)
username9: girl are you just gonna ignore the fact that ARTHUR AND GEORGE WERE THERE ???
↳ username10: for REAL my delusional y/nthur ass is going into OVERDRIVE
arthurnfhill: was a great night, glad i got to catch the show :)
↳ username11: oh you guys are TWISTED dropping comments like this
↳ username12: literally still in love i am not hearing any different.
bambinobecky: can i be ur biggest fan?
↳ yourusername: anyday sexy ;)
username13: the fact she scheduled it just a couple days before his london dates so arthur could make it ..... coincidence ???
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liked by arthurtv, yourusername and 6290 others
mummysboypod: Mum, did you miss me on tour?
The NEW episode of Mummy's Boy is now live - with Arthur and Lisa discussing Arthur's life on tour, from crazed fans to drunken nights!
Link in bio!
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liked by yourusername, arthurtv and 6380 others
arthurnfhill: i still cannot believe kill hill is over!! i will miss seeing all of you lovely people and playing you my silly songs
arthurtv: what does slay mean and why do women keep shouting it at you?
↳ arthurnfhill: because i ATE arthur
↳ arthurtv: you ate me?
username14: TOUR WAS SO INCREDIBLE!!!
username15: y/n being in the crowd was NOT. a coincidence
username16: is y/nthur back????
username17: you seemed SO much happier towards end of tour
username18: DUBLIN MISSES YOU ALREADY !!!
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liked by georgeclarkeey, arthurnfhill and 9374 others
yourusername: in musical terms... you could call this an encore?
username19: IMAGINE REANNOUNCING Y/NTHUR IN THE MOST ICONIC WAY POSSIBLE.
georgeclarkeey: i think everyone clocked when you were love heart eyeing him the whole concert
↳ yourusername: well you also did that and no one has realised yet?
↳ georgeclarkeey: it's MY bed he comes back to sweetie
lisahull_hill: you both have the sweetest smiles
↳ yourusername: LISA I MISSED YOU SO MUCH
↳ arthurnfhill: yourusername i believe you said 'more than i missed you by a long shot' ??
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kaciidubs · 1 year ago
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Hii! Omg first of all I love your works! Seconddd I was wondering if I could request fem reader being needy while bangchan is busy working on music so he has her riding his thigh to get off ?
Hello Nonnie!! Thank you so much, I'm glad you've read them! And of course you can! I'm a sucker for this concept so I hope you enjoy~
Work from Home
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❣ Summary: On nights like these, you were thankful Chris was able to take his work anywhere he wanted. ❣  ❣ Word Count: 2.8k ❣ Warnings: Pleasure Dom! Chris, Sub! Reader, daddy kink, dacryphilia, thigh riding, a lot of begging, praise, degradation, reader is extremely needy, comfort, allusions to multiple rounds ❣  ❣ Female! Reader [No use of Y/N] | You/Your pronouns ❣  ❣ Additional Tags: Chan is referred to as Chris, Channie, and Baby, Reader is referred to as Baby, Princess, Good Girl, and Slut, a lot of word 'please' being used, Chris calls himself Daddy ❣ Stray Kids Masterlist ❣ General Masterlist
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Chris was a busy man, you understood that the same as about 99% of the population who knew of him; he was the leader of seven darling, crazy boys, the leader of the 4th generation of Kpop, a writer, composer, lyricist, computer programmer, amongst the numerous other titles he had hidden in his extensive resume.
Chris was also your boyfriend; silly, kind, obnoxiously good looking, bashful, caring, insanely good at making omelets, hot, great with kids, animal lover, dad joke aficionado, and did you mention drop dead gorgeous?
Especially when he was making music?
It was one of the few nights he opted to bring his work home with him, toting his gray macbook as he shuffled through your shared apartment’s front door, offering you a shy apology as he told you he needed to work on a few more tracks throughout the evening.
Of course you brushed off his needless apology with a smile - even though you liked for him to have a break from work whenever he was home, you ultimately knew there’d be late nights of editing and schedule reviewing that he couldn’t avoid - and told him you had no problem with occupying yourself until it was time for the coveted “which takeout menu are we ordering from tonight” game.
But, damn, did he always look that sexy in that black t-shirt you’d seen time and time again? And did his lips always have that subtle shine to them or did he reapply chapstick in the car - god, did he lick them?
“No problem, baby - I’ll come get you for dinner, ‘kay?” You watched as his previous worry melted into gratefulness, stepping forward to press a kiss to your temple before making his way to your shared bedroom.
Maybe, just maybe, his plan of working from home wasn’t the best mode of action - not that it was his fault in the slightest, of course not! 
But you knew how you got at the sight of him working on his music, headphones on so as to not disturb you - even though you were in two completely different rooms - and he knew that you loved watching him in his element, admiration set in those pretty eyes of yours.
Shaking yourself out of whatever horny stupor that decided fog your brain, you confined yourself to doing whatever it took to keep yourself occupied and away from your slightly workaholic boyfriend; tidying up the living room, washing what little dishes were left in the sink, even going so far as attempting the new season of the anime you were neglecting.
An hour.
One hour.
You felt like you were going crazy, your body hot and strung like a freshly crafted bowstring, the first episode of your anime currently on pause as you stared at the slightly ajar door of your bedroom; keen ears picking up the subtle key taps of his laptop.
God, what you wouldn’t give to have those long, pretty fingers of his on you, in you. He was probably focused too, his plump lips set into a pout, his eyebrows slightly pinched as if he were mad at something, but it was simply him trying to keep the hundreds of ideas in his head together.
Throwing your head back in exasperated whine, you quickly came to terms with the options laid before you; A) force yourself to sit through three 35 minute episodes and give him the space he deserves, or B) take matters into your own hands.
Your body must have made up your mind for you as you suddenly found yourself two steps away from the bedroom door, hand reaching out to push the door wider - welcoming yourself to a sight that made your heart and pussy flutter.
Chris was currently propped against the headboard, two pillows used to support his back as he supported his laptop on his thighs- god, his thighs.
There wasn’t a day where you weren’t thinking about them, especially when he was wearing his staple pair of black shorts that not only accentuated the sculpted muscles but highlighted that amazing ass of his - the same shorts he was currently wearing now, in fact.
You were drooling in more ways than one, hungrily staring at the exposed skin as if you’d never been exposed to them before.
“Baby?”
His soft call for you was enough for your heated gaze to meet his gentle eyes, squinted a little from the strain of staring at the screen of his laptop.
“You okay? Wanna figure out what to eat now?”
Shaking your head, you finally willed yourself to walk further into the room, hands going to the waistband of your sleep shorts as you unceremoniously stripped them off - leaving you in a simple pair of cotton panties, definitely not the pair that screamed “take me now”, but that was the least of your concerns.
Chris’ eyes widened, flicking between the discarded shorts, your partially bare lower half, and your face, “Princess? What-”
“I need you.” The whine came desperate from your lips as you crawled onto the foot of the bed.
Chris’ heart clenched, his pulse racing from the sight of you - pupils blown and fogged with lust - sitting on your calves with what he could only describe as pure submission, waiting for his acceptance to your invitation. He wanted you too, there was honestly rarely a moment when he didn’t want you, but he was just at the peak of his creative flow and he didn’t want to treat you to a half assed session in the sheets because his head was elsewhere.
“I… Princess, you know I love you, and I love that you love me, but-” An apologetic frown curved his lips, the coming words making him feel like a terrible boyfriend, “I-I’m so close to finishing this, there isn’t enough time-”
“Channie, please? Fuck, please? Please, please, I’m so turned on it hurts,” you nearly sobbed, your aching pussy throbbing now that his presence was near and so, so close to satiating your craving. “You don’t even have to fuck me - I can just ride you?  You can finger me? Eat me out? I’ll do anything - I- I-” Your tear lined eyes flicked to his thighs, taking in the expanse that his laptop didn’t cover, “-I’ll ride your thigh? Y-You don’t even have to stop working! Just- Just make it stop, daddy, please.”
His face softened, and he wasn’t ignorant to the twitch in his shorts at your proposition; his laptop didn’t take that much room for you to be able to get comfortable on one of his thighs, and even if it did he could just put it at an angle - it wasn’t that big of a deal, not when his girlfriend was in such dire need for relief.
“You wanna ride daddy’s thigh?” A soft grin stretched his lips when you nodded hastily, lips set into a pout. “Okay, princess, come ‘ere.”
Your panties were slid off in record time, left in a puddle at the foot of the bed as you made your way to his lap. It took a few moments of repositioning, Chris tugging up the loose fabric on his right thigh for you to straddle it, hovering over the muscle and practically vibrating with anticipation.
“Look at you,” he cooed as he adjusted the decorative pillow supporting the other half of his laptop, “so fucked out of that pretty brain of yours, yet you still wait for daddy’s permission.” Once he was satisfied with the balance, his warm eyes found yours and he cocked his head to the side, “Gimme a kiss, princess.”
Leaning forward, you happily met his soft lips with your own and - shit, he did reapply that cherry chapstick - a shiver ran down your spine as a moan vibrated in your throat, fingers curling in his shirt in an effort to pull him closer.
You could feel his lips curl into a smirk, parting just so your noses and foreheads were still touching.
“Go on, make yourself feel good on me, yeah? I promise I’ll fuck you right when I’m done.”
Sighing a shaky breath, you finally lowered yourself onto the firm muscle of this thigh, choking on a moan from the delicious pressure on your clit, feeding the fire raging in your lower stomach. “F-Fuck- Feels so good, daddy.”
Chris hummed in acknowledgement before bringing his attention to the backing track currently waiting for him - just a few more edits, maybe another sample or two, then he’d be all yours, he promised.
You moved your hips at a testing pace, shivering at the short glide your puddling arousal made on his skin before fully committing to the movement; pressing yourself harder against his leg with the tried and true method; forward, back, forward, back, forward with a little grind, then back again. To keep yourself steady, you held his shoulder with your right hand while your left gripped high on his thigh, fingertips just barely grazing the area of his crotch.
“Daddy.” Your lips parted in a breathy moan, head lolling back as you let yourself get lost in the pleasure.
“Baby, a little quieter, please.”
You didn’t even notice the typing happening beside you, or the subtle shift in Chris’ demeanor until you brought your head back up again, eyes locked in on his illuminated face - and, most importantly, his concentrated pout.
Another wave of arousal flowed from your cunt, making the grind of your hips that much easier as you watched him. “But- Daddy, it feels good, why-”
“Because I’m still working, baby girl,” he didn’t even bother side eyeing you, eyes flitting around the screen in search of another asset, “if you can’t control yourself then you can get off and wait until I’m done.”
Your heart clenched, nails digging into the cotton of his sweatpants as you shook your head, “N-No! No, I’ll be quiet, I’ll be good.”
“Good girl.”
The only sign of good graces he gave you was a subtle flex of his thigh that had you curling forward, nearly knocking your head into his shoulder until you steadied yourself again.
A soft, slow breath fell from your lips before you went back to focusing on the hypnotic forward, back of your hips, rolling them in a way akin to the way you would if you were riding his dick - something you were currently aware of making a tent in his shorts.
‘I promise I’ll fuck you right when I’m done.’
Your hips stuttered, walls clenching helplessly around nothing as you remembered his promise - his guarantee of fucking you until the only thing going through your mind is him.
Choking back a whimper, you rode his thigh with a new fire - shivering breaths escaping you with each subtle tense of his thigh and every odd drag of his skin against your budding clit.
Soon, with the help of your overactive imagination and a few shifts from Chris, you found yourself at the peak of your climax, teetering just on the edge but nothing was quite enough to push you over; your thighs were tense and sore, muscles burning as your poor, neglected pussy begged for something more than the repetitive grinding.
Blinking away the heavy fog of lust blurring your vision, you lifted your head to look at the man in front of you, heart skipping a beat as he looked completely unbothered from the act happening in front of him - if you hadn’t known any better, you would have thought he wasn’t even interested in you, but the blush taking over his ears and neck were telltale signs he was.
“C-Channie…” Your voice was weak, wavering from your tireless efforts at getting the high you oh so desperately needed.
“A few more minutes, baby, I just need to play it back and-”
“Channie, no, please, I-” Breath hitching, ultimately growing frustrated by his nonchalant attitude, you pressed on, “I can’t, ‘s not enough - please, please, help me?”
His jaw tensed and you knew you struck a nerve, his eyes snapping to yours for the first time since you entered the bedroom.
“It’s not enough? Baby girl,” he tutted, huffing a breath through his nose, “you were the one who came in here whining like a needy little slut, soaking wet without me having to even lay a finger on you - let alone be in the same room - and now what you begged for isn’t enough?”
Despite his scolding, the motions of your hips didn’t falter - if anything, they sped up, grew firmer as you continued to drive for your orgasm.
“Daddy, I-” A small sniffle escaped you, tears from being pent up for the past 30 minutes welling in your eyes and trailing down your cheeks, “I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it! I- I need you - need your touch, need your cock, n-need you to help me, please!”
The speed at which he tossed his laptop to the side should have had you worried about the hard drives taped to the back, but you weren’t - not when he was finally paying attention to you, touching you, indulging in you.
His large hands dripped the plush of your hips, immediately dragging them into a longer, faster pattern that had you keening in his hold; your head tipping back in a loud, unabashed moan.
“Poor princess can’t do anything without her daddy helping, huh? I thought I gave you everything you needed, too.” He spoke in a hushed tone, as if he were voicing his grievances out to himself as he dragged you - nearly bouncing you - against his thigh. “I let you use my thigh like some fucking toy while I worked, I helped you adjust, I helped you get there, but it still wasn’t good enough - not for a spoiled princess like you.”
Chris’ bruising grip slid down to your ass, squeezing the flesh before raising his right hand to land a smack against the swell of the cheek.
A surprised yelp escaped you, your left hand now holding onto his other shoulder for dear life, the heat of his strong stare making your pussy quiver.
“C-Chri- Daddy- Daddy, can I - fuck- I-I need- inside-”
“No.” He licked his lips, fixing you with a domineering gaze, “You’re gonna come using my thigh, and my thigh only, just like you wanted.” You let out a whine of disdain and he raised his eyebrow, poking his cheek with his tongue before cocking his head to the side. “Oh? But, princess, that’s what you wanted - that’s what you came to me for, begged me for, so that’s what I’m giving you, now fucking come like the good little slut you are.”
You gasped, body stilling as his words fell from his mouth and went straight to your cunt, pushing you into the orgasm you’ve been craving for so, so long. “D-Daddy! Daddy! I’m c- ah!”
He guided your hips into a short grind, helping you ride out your orgasm as your cum further coated his dripping thigh - he was sure some of it even trailed around the sides and stained the sheets underneath, but that was a problem he’d handle in a few more hours.
“There you go, that’s my girl - my good girl.” He cooed, eyes trained on your face currently enraptured in bliss, the tension melting from your body with each ragged breath you took. “That’s it, princess.”
Your hips stilled once you finally came down, laying your head against his shoulder with a tired huff and melting further into his body.
“You okay, princess?” Chris hummed softly, arms coming up to wrap around your waist, “Didn’t take it too far, did I? Wasn’t too much?”
You hummed, shaking your head as you turned to lay on your cheek, lips gracing his warm neck, “Nuh uh, daddy, it wasn’t too far - I liked it, ‘m okay.”
“Good.” He brought a hand up to softly massage the back of your neck, essentially cradling you against him.
A few moments passed before you sat up, a little less foggy-headed and more at ease with the handsome man you had the honor to call your boyfriend. “Okay, Channie, you can go back to work - ‘m sorry for distracting you.”
His eyes widened a bit before he looked askance, hands falling to your bare thighs as he cleared his throat, “Ah, well, I… sort of… finished it a few minutes before you asked for my help to get you to come - I was just clicking around to see if you could actually get off just from grinding on me.”
He expected you to lash out at him, for telling a white lie just to see if you could finish without his help, but when he looked back at you all he could see was an all too familiar sparkle in your eyes - the lips he wanted to kiss ever since you came into the bedroom curling into a smile.
“So you… You can make good on your promise?”
Chris chuckled, shaking his head in disbelief before glancing back at you, a familiar glint in his eyes making you shiver. “Oh, princess, you know I always keep my promises, especially to you.”
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astermath · 1 year ago
Text
nemesis; part two.
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pairing: carmen berzatto x fem!reader
summary: with carmen reworking the restaurant, you’d think his mind would be far too occupied to even think about anything else. yet he can’t shake the guilt from what he’d put you through a month prior. after some talks in therapy, he decides to take a leap of faith and see if he can talk it out with you. he not only wants to convince you that he can be better, but he's got an offer for you too. one you truly can't refuse.
♡ landing page ♡
word count: 4.9K
tags: carmen being unsure about his feelings but trying to be better episode 3265742, letting reader in a little more, APOLOGIES!!!, cursing ig, carm goes to therapy yippee, syd being the absolute realest, regular font below!
notes: sorry this took literally forever omg, I lost my carmen muse for a bit but we are SO back baby. I missed him so much and so sorry if some things don't follow the canon completely (I've been watching season 2 on and off bc I've been so busy lol BUT my fics never follow the canon completely anyways),, hope u guys enjoy and let me know if you'd like a part three ;))
lmk if you'd like to be added to the tag list for further carmen berzatto related content! comments and reblogs are highly appreciated!
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Carmen’s life hadn’t known a moment of mental rest in ages. If you asked him when he last sat down with his thoughts or acknowledged his mental anguish, he probably would have said he couldn’t remember the last time. If ever.
With plans to completely revamp The Beef and everything that came with it, now his feelings should be the last thing on his mind. Renovation plans, unforeseen costs and a completely new menu, sure, he could worry his ass off about those, but feelings? Absolutely not. Good thing he was usually so good at suppressing those anyways.
So why was it that he couldn’t shake the thought of what he did to you?
Why, every time he had a moment to himself, would he be overtaken by this intense feeling of guilt? He didn’t even have to be alone, just a second of quiet and the image of you crying in distress would intrude on his thoughts.
It was getting to a point where he’d told his sister, Natalie, about it. Well, not all of it, he wasn’t even sure if he knew all of it. Just that he knows he hurt you, and that coming to terms with what he projected onto you might be a good first step in understanding himself better.
Or maybe it was something more along the lines of “I gotta talk my shit to some people”. Probably that.
To his surprise, it was actually helping. Besides the group therapy sessions where he’d talk about Mikey, the business and his future, he was talking to other people in his life too. Even told Sydney about you, kind of on accident. The words just seemed to… Flow out. It was probably the exhaustion doing its thing.
“I guess I just felt like,” he kept his eyes on the floor he was sweeping, “she was doing it all to fuck with me. I don’t even know where I got the sick idea that she had some obsession over me, but it— it drove me at the same time. It’s like her being on my heels at every aspect of culinary school just made me want to try even harder.”
“Maybe you painted her in that light because you knew it was a good way to keep pushing yourself.” Sydney spoke almost absentmindedly, sweeping the other side of the room. She listened to everything he said in the meantime, and though what he was telling her was a bit worrying, she was glad they got to have talks like this. Carmen often doesn’t like to bring up his past like that.
“Huh,” he paused sweeping for a moment, “yeah… yeah, maybe. Or maybe it was something else.”
Sydney wasn’t even sure he knew what he was referring to. It sounded like something entirely different, like a crush, but what kind of person treats their crushes like that?
Probably an overworked, pressured, overachieving culinary student with a dangerous need for validation. But she wasn’t about to tell him that.
“So yeah, I visited her restaurant, and… It just felt the exact same as back in New York, you know? Like she was rubbing it in my face again, and— and I know that sounds insane, or conceited, but I just can’t let it go. It’s like the thought of her is stuck to my brain like a stubborn piece of gum.” He wanted to smack himself for that stupid analogy, but what was said was said.
“So how’d you handle it?” Sydney’s head perked up, some of her braids now draping over her shoulders.
“Handle what?” Carmen became more and more uneasy the more he talked about you. Like his chest was tight, it was uncomfortable, but not in the way he was when the health inspection came by, it was different. Weirder. Unfamiliar. He didn’t like it, because he didn’t understand it.
“The talk with her.” She emptied the last bit of dust into the trash bag.
“Oh,” his mind took him back to the parking lot a month ago. The way he could almost taste the tears of your skin from how close he stood, he could hear the shakiness of your breath and the profound desperation in your voice when you apologized to him, when you really had no reason to.
If it was still so clear in his mind, then what must it be like for you?
“Carmen?” Sydney snapped him out of his oncoming train of thought.
“Yeah? Sorry, I— Uh, I don’t know it was…” He runs a hand through his hair, suddenly finding it in his best interest to look anywhere else but her face. “Bad. It was— It was bad.” He looks a bit shameful when he meets her eyes. “I fucked up. I like, went all New York boss on her. And then I just… Left.”
His colleague just stares at him for a moment. She knew what he was like when he snapped like that, but that was with his staff, people he liked. So how badly did he snap on you, a person he’d been resenting for years?
“I’m gonna go take out this trash, and uh… Head home.” She lifts the grey plastic bag she was holding. “But uh, Carm?”
“Yeah?”
“You got issues, man.” She has a bit of an awkward smile on her face, but he knows she means it. He knows she’s right. She usually is.
He nods, silently, letting her words sink in. He did have issues, everyone knew that, but most people didn’t just say it. That’s why he liked Sydney, she was so real, so honest. She was so good for the business, for the kitchen. And maybe her saying that to him was all part of grounding him in the reality of it all. Of his issues, just that they existed.
“Heard.” he says. His voice comes out raspier than he expected, like he’s struggling to say it.
“Goodnight, chef.”
“Night.”
He’d thought about what Sydney said the entire night. He does have issues, he knows that, he’s just mad at himself for letting everything get this far before seeking help. It scares him. Because it reminds him too much of Mikey. Or what he heard about him when things got bad.
He doesn’t want to make the same mistakes his brother did. Lock people out of his life just because it seems easier, because it’s better to minimize the damage than to figure out why you’re doing damage at all. And yes it’s uncomfortable, yes it’s scary, terrifying even. But he keeps being reminded of how it must feel for you.
It’s something he’d never considered before. He always thought he had you all figured out, all fake smiles and backhanded compliments to distract him. It never occurred to him to just… Ask. It was always just easier to assume. It fit his view of you and it kept him going, even if it was at the expense of ever getting to know you at all.
He’s hoping he can change that with a few text messages and a long, probably uncomfortable, talk over coffee. Just hoping, trying, that’s really all he can do. He’s well aware of how bad he is at communicating, but he has to give it a shot. For you, at least.
He stares at his phone screen for far longer than is necessary, continuously rereading the messages he’d typed. His eyes keep flicking to your contact, making sure he sent it to the right person. The only thing you two had texted about before was a time and place for him to try your new restaurant. His heart aches at the exclamation points and emojis you’d sent; you were so excited, and he drove all that excitement straight into the ground.
He closes his eyes and shuts off the phone. His chest hurts, like he’s been holding his breath the entire time. Maybe he has. You could have that effect on him, making it harder to breathe. He always wondered why he had such nervous reactions around you specifically. He always figured it had to do with your one sided rivalry, but it feels… Different. More complex.
Your eyes are finally peeled off your computer screen when numerous phone notifications alarm you. Truth be told, you’ve been trying your best to keep yourself occupied as much as possible. That usually helps when you get waves of emotions like this, keeping busy, distracting your mind from overthinking.
Ever since your last encounter with Carmen, you’ve been so on edge. Always trying to do something, anything, so you wouldn’t have to think about what happened, why he acted like that to you. Because you know if you did, you’d just start blaming yourself again, and you’d be back to square one.
Your eyebrows raise at the name of the contact. You were sure he’d blocked you, or at least deleted your number after last time. He was avoidant like that, and frankly, you weren’t sure if you wanted him to talk to you again after that anyways. Maybe it was just to drive the point home, make you feel even more worthless.
Still, you were curious. Even if it was just to cuss you out even more, at least you knew what to expect, right?
[carmen]: hey, I really want to talk to you about what happened last time.
[carmen]: well
[carmen]: I want to apologise
[carmen]: but I can’t do that like this
[carmen]: I’d much rather do it in person
[carmen]: if you’d let me
[carmen]: meet me at odette’s tomorrow around 10? coffee’s on me, I just want to talk
[carmen]: please
The last message was sent minutes later than the rest, while you were reading them. He was desperate for an answer, and though you wanted to hear him out, to talk to him, something in you felt off about the whole thing. Like he was just doing this to clear off his own guilt, only to then ditch you just like he ditched you after culinary school. Because you’re rivals, apparently. That’s what you do.
But then there’s something else in you too. The part that’s still nostalgic about New York with him. About the glances back and forth when you were timed on preparing certain things, about the way he’d stare at you when you got feedback, the ignorant bliss you lived in. When you still believed he might have liked you just a little.
That part of you takes the upper hand when you reply and take his offer. Your heart is in your throat, nerves overtaking you already and you weren’t even with him yet. He had that effect on you sometimes, making it harder to breathe.
You wondered what that meant.
Carmen sits alone at a booth, all the way at the back of the café he’d chosen. It’s rather quiet, as most Mondays are, yet at the same time, it’s so loud. Loud in the way he hears the clinking of every spoon against porcelain cups, the crinkling of a napkin and the not so subtle ticking of the clock above the entrance. 10:06. You were late.
Suddenly he's filled with more regret than he's ever felt before. He's not ready to see you again, only to be reminded of how he made you cry, and of his own tumultuous emotions and shortcomings that lead to this moment. It's surprising how fast the emotions he associates with you changed; he's not angry anymore, he's scared, guilty, nervous. He wants to see you so bad and yet he feels like you'd be better off never talking to him again.
It's too late to make a run for it when you finally walk through the door. Hair a little damp from the rain, just a bit disheveled from what he could only assume to be rushing over to the café. And that same angelic smile you offer to the barista that greets you, the same one you'd offer him every morning, whether he looked at you or not.
He had no choice but to look now.
Your smile falters into something more nervous, a little melancholic, when your eyes meet his across the café. Though you knew he was going to be there, something in you feels surprised to see him again. Maybe it’s because he isn’t yelling at you or throwing insults at your head this time. Or maybe because he’s actually looking you in the eye. Since when did he get so good at that?
You sit down across him, taking off your coat and putting your bag besides you.
“Hey.” You smile again, much more awkward this time.
“Hey.” He returns the same thin lipped smile.
It’s quiet for a few seconds. Carmen swears the whole café has gone silent in that moment, leaving the two of you to listen to the sound of your own breathing and heartrate picking up. You’re not sure where to look, not being used to being in such an intimate setting with him.
“Do you want a coffee?”
“Sorry I was late.”
You both talk over each other, and the urge to chuckle about it overtakes you. Carmen can’t help but smile as well. You seem nervous, and somehow that puts him a little more at ease. Like he’s not the only one who’s in their head about it.
“Sorry, I, uhm, yeah— I would like a coffee.” You scramble over your words. “Please.”
“Sure,” he nods, “and no worries.”
“Hm?”
“That you were late. I haven’t been here that long either.” He lied. He’d been there half an hour early, cursing himself for letting him sit along with his thoughts for that long and psyching himself out into almost leaving.
You both order and another heavy silence sits between you two. You both know why you’re there, what needs to be talked about. Yet neither of you know how to bring it up.
You’ve lived most of your lives believing this version of each other you had in your minds. Because it kept you grounded. Because it was easier. He never let you in and for the longest time, you were at peace with that. You could have a slightly distant view of who he was, your classmate, your rival. And he could do the same. Keep you out, pretend you were there to keep him on his toes, to always try to outdo him.
Those facades of each other don’t work anymore. The real world has forced you to reconcile with each other, whether you liked it or not.
Your coffee gets brought to your table, and both of you feel this urgency to say something, anything, at least.
“The pastries here are good too, if you want to get one.” He finally broke the awkward silence. He can start with talking about food, something he knows. If all else fails, resort back to that.
“I haven’t tried a pastry besides my own in a long time. Maybe I could learn a thing or two here.” You admit. He knows that feeling. He’s not nearly as adventurous with his food choices as he wants to be, but as a busy chef on the brink of a new entrepreneurship, it’s usually beef sandwiches and frozen meals.
“I think yours were better though.” He takes a sip of his coffee.
“Huh?” You look up, realizing you were avoiding eye contact by staring into your cup.
“The danish I tried at your place. It was fire.”
“Oh. Right. Thank you, we make everything from scratch.”
“I could tell.” He takes another sip. “I guess I— I kinda forgot to tell you that. In the heat of it all.” He huffs to himself. “Food was so good it made me upset.”
“Upset?” His word use frustrates you. Upset is when they forget to give you your sauce with your order. What happened back there was not upset. That was rage. Wrath. You raise an eyebrow and he realizes he said something wrong.
“Well, more than upset. Listen, I— We need to talk about what happened.” His blue eyes peer into your own. They’re almost distracting enough to avoid you noticing his fidgeting hands.
“I’m listening.” You lean back slightly in your seat. You’d played nice with Carmen all your life, given him every chance to return it. Now it was his turn to try.
"Right." Of course he has to talk. It's his fault, isn't it? He's the one who snapped-- why did he even imply you'd have to explain yourself? He runs a hand through his hair, and there he goes again, eyes darting across the café to find something to focus on as he sought out the right words. You'd almost find it endearing, how bad he is at this, if it wasn't so important to you.
"You don't do this often, do you?"
"What, like-- meeting up for coffee?"
"Talking about stuff. Your feelings and shit." You hid your slightly amused smile behind your coffee cup before taking a small sip.
"Oh. Yeah, no, I-- I don't. Not until recently." He takes a deep breath. Just like they had told him to. “I’ve been going to this therapy thing my sister recommended. S’not much, but… It’s a start. Talked about the restaurant, my brother—“
“Your brother?” Your eyebrows raise slightly.
“Yeah, my— my brother. Mikey.” He looks a bit surprised. He’s come to the shattering realization that he’s never told you anything about his personal life, ever. You don’t even know about one of the most important people in his life, his main drive. You’ve known each other for so long yet you know so little. “I never told you about him?”
“You never told me anything.” You answer curtly. “We never really… Talked, you know?”
“Yeah— yeah, you’re right. I just thought… Wow.” He smiles, more out of shock than anything. He feels so stupid. How immature is it to be feuding this much with a person who doesn’t know anything about you?
“I guess I really don’t know much about you either.” His fingers rake through his messy curls again. “Makes me feel like even more of an idiot for going off on you like that. Like I had you all figured out.”
“Yeah, that was uh... That was something." The mood shifts a little. His smile fades as soon as he sees the melancholy in your eyes return. Of course it wouldn't be that easy for you to forgive him, to feel better about all this. "You know, I never knew you thought of me like that." A small smile graces your features. Somehow it's sadder than the expression you had before.
"I mean, I knew you didn't like me. I was pretty much at peace with the fact that you were never going to like me, either. But I never thought you hated me that much." You sniffle, trying your hardest to blink away any oncoming tears. "Like your life, your entire career, would have been easier without me there at all."
His heart aches at the sight of you, all teary eyed and trying to be brave. You're much braver than him. Sadness is a much harder thing to express than anger. He's starting to figure that out more and more.
"I don't hate you." He starts. He sees the confusion contort your features, and he knows he's not making any sense. "I mean I did-- I did hate you. Or, maybe not you, just... The fucked up idea I had of you. And-- and that was on me, that was my own fault." He feels an urge to touch you; to rub your back, hold your hand, anything to comfort you. It's tearing him apart to know that he's the cause of all this.
"But why?" A single tear rolls down your cheek, leaving a wet streak on your skin in its wake. "Why did you think that about me? I-- I get that we had a little rivalry going but jesus Carmen, did you really think I spent my whole culinary school career trying to outdo you?"
"To be honest... Yeah." He feels ashamed. So ashamed. He hopes the waitress doesn't walk by and listen to any of this, see you crying, and make you feel even worse. "Cooking was always just... My thing. If I was good for anything, it would be that. So seeing you do so well at something I'd started to base my whole existence around, it made me jealous, so fucking jealous." He meets your eyes, even if it's hard. You have to know he's being sincere.
"And it's-- it's unfair, it's so unfair to you, I know, and I'm really fuckin' sorry. I'm trying to work on myself, on everything, and I hope I can prove that to you." His face has that red tint you recognize whenever he's nervous or stressed. You can tell this is taking a lot from him.
"Is that really all? You were just jealous?" Your voice is quieter, fragile almost.
"I don't know. I wanna think it's that simple but I really don't know. There's a lot I don't understand about me, or you, or us. My mind doesn't know how to react when I see you anymore I think, now that things are different." He takes a deep breath, like saying that took a physical toll on him. "You have this-- this weird effect on me, and I don't know how to cope with it. I think it was just easier to be mad at you than to be anything else."
Anger is easier to express than sadness. The easiest out of all emotions, actually. Sometimes a little too easy.
You look to the side, wiping your cheek with the back of your hand. You huff out something close to a laugh, and though he’s caught off guard by it, he doesn’t mind it. Even if you’re laughing at him, at least that means you’re not crying.
“You’ve got issues Berzatto. You know that?”
“Yeah. I’ve been told.” He smiles, and it’s heartfelt this time. Not nervous, or sad, or awkward. He’s happy to see you a little more at ease.
“It’s just really crazy to me.” You trace your finger over the edge of your coffee cup as you talk. “I spent so much time in culinary school looking up to you. And then I find out you were always just trying to keep up with me.”
Carmen’s eyebrows raise a little at your words. “Looked up to me?”
“Yeah, like… Your drive, your passion, it’s so impressive. Always looking to improve, to do better, it just— it inspired me to do better too. As cheesy as that may sound.” You smiled. “S’why I opened up in Chicago, you know.”
“Really? Huh.” He leaned back in his seat.
“Because I wanted to work with you. Or for you. Either would have been fine with me.” You sigh. “I like owning my own place, but… I don’t know, for some reason I always imagined us working together.” You smiled. “Is that stupid?”
“No,” he replied quickly, “no not at all, I— I totally get that.” He’s quiet for a few seconds, and you can practically hear the gears turning in his head when he stares at you for a moment.
“I mean you’re a remarkable chef, really, like— insanely remarkable, and, well, we’re revamping the restaurant completely right now. We need people— more people, new people, and so, I was wondering— or I’ve been thinking—“ He stops himself from losing his breath from all his rambling, before he freaks you out even more than he already has.
“I want you to come work for us at the Bear.” He puts his hands together, as if he’s about to beg. “Please.”
You can almost hear yourself blinking out of confusion. There’s suddenly no more loud silences, no, the café seems dead quiet for once. All you can do is stare at him, wait for a laugh, because clearly this was a joke right? There’s no way Carmen Berzatto, chef supreme, arch nemesis of yours, would want you anywhere near him, let alone work in his own establishment.
“I’m sorry?”
He feels stupid already. You had every reason to say no. He’d been the biggest asshole in the world to you, he’d kept his distance all his life, and now he expects you to be his employee. Or, well, colleague, more so.
“I’m uh— we’re redoing the restaurant entirely. New equipment, new staff, new everything.” He swallows; the thought of everything that needed to be done arises for a moment. “We need people that work hard, who know what they’re doing and who are passionate about it. And I barely know anyone who’s better at what you do than yourself.” He pauses, waiting for you to stop him. But you don’t.
“So I’m asking if you’d work for me. With me. It won’t be anything like old days, if anything I— I need to learn from you.” He scoffs at himself. “Could take a thing or two about how to communicate with my staff.”
You smile, and he genuinely thinks you’re about to start laughing at him. You chuckle, but it’s not mean, it’s honest. Cute.
“You know, you have great timing.” You grin.
“I do?” the smile on his face reflects the hope he feels.
“One of my chefs wants to take over the place for me. Well, has been wanting to. I haven’t had an exact reason to say yes to her yet.” You shrugged. “Guess I do now.”
“…Is that you saying yes?”
“It’s definitely not me saying no.” Your eyes meet his, and there’s something between you both that’s different now. It’s not like there’s a switch that’s been flipped. It‘s more like this conversation was the turning page of a new chapter.
“I’ll think about it. I want to see it first. Maybe talk to some of your staff.” Carmen’s chest strains a little when he thinks about you interacting with Richie. Then he’s reassured when he thinks about you interacting with Sydney or Marcus. You’d fit in well, you have great feeling for people.
“Yeah— yeah, I get that. Totally. I can arrange that. Uhm, we’re renovating right now, actually, it’s all really kinda wild, but if you wanna stop by, chat with Syd, or Nat, or talk about the plans, let me know. I’m sure they’d love to talk to you.” He’s not lying, you seem like you’d get along well with them. Especially Sydney. Your thinking processes are very similar to each other. And to his.
Carmen gets the bill, even though you try to pay for it.
“It’s just a coffee, just let me get this one.”
You let him have this one, simply because you can’t argue with him after the conversation you just had. You’re in too good of a mood after his proposition too.
He walks you to your car, hands in his pockets when you reach it. It’s cold outside, and his breath comes out in visible puffs of air. His nose is a little red, but you think it looks cute.
“Thanks for coming, by the way,” he starts, “I know you didn’t have to. Like— after how I acted to you. But— But I really do appreciate that you’re givin' me a chance here.” He’d always been confused about how positive and faithful you were in people. He never thought he’d be grateful for those exact features too.
“No worries, I… I had a good time. I’m glad we talked.” The keys jingle as you fidget with them. Among them is a keychain in the shape of a cherry, he recognizes it. It reminds him of how little you’ve both changed. And how much.
“Yeah.” He sighs. Relieved, almost. “Me too. But I’ll let you leave, might wanna tell your chef the good news.”
“Good news?” You quirk an eyebrow.
“That you’re selling them the business.”
“I haven’t decided yet, Carm.” You scoff. But he can tell you have, you look too excited about it all to not have your mind made up yet. It excites him too. Scares him a bit as well, but what’s a new chapter without a bit of tension?
“Right. Sorry.” He huffs. “Just text me when you wanna head over to see the place. It’s uh… It’s a work in progress, but it’s getting somewhere.”
“I believe you. I’m looking forward to it.” You lean back against your car a little.
“Yeah. Me too.”
“See y’around?” You unlock it and walk up to the driver’s side.
“Course. Uh, don’t be a stranger.”
You grin, leaning down to get into the vehicle. “Never with you, Berzatto.”
He watches you drive off, standing in the cold for far longer than any sensible person has any business standing there. But he feels good. He feels warm.
He thinks about what you said to him before you left. You were right, you were never a stranger to him. You were always like a constant in his life; whether you were actually present or not. And even if he didn’t know that much about you, which he was insistent on changing, you were never a stranger.
Never with him.
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tag list <3
@beebslebobs @thatone-brightstar  @spr3id  @deadandstill  @777iii  @magicboytrash  @dogdevourer @wiipes @sierrahhh  @crayzmarvelfan800 @azxulaa  @astridyoo15   @rexorangecouny  @azxulaa @jointherebellion215 @diorrfairy @chanluuvr @idontexist-anymore @wolfiealina
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patchofgrey · 5 months ago
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NejiTen headcannons pt 2; because yes
Yes, welcome to part 2 of my delulu, please enjoy my head cannons for my OTP. If you need part 1 here it be. part 3 is spicey.
Here are my Tenten Head Cannons and some Neji Head Cannons that don't completely go against cannon (more like add ons to the cannon to add some spice) that I use for my fanfics. They remain pretty consistent throughout (give or take a few characters).
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1. Their first kiss was an impulsive mistake 😬. I could see Tenten being overly excited about an achievement, or Neji does a huge favor for her (his love language is acts of service and gift giving) and impulsively kisses him due to be wrapped up in the moment. Especially when they’re like just turned sixteen, so think right before Shippuuden. Neji is surprised, but doesn’t push her away or offers any kind of repulsive reaction. In fact, it didn’t register in Tenten’s mind that she had potentially taken Neji’s first kiss at all (oblivious but hey, still love her). When Neji asked her about it, she had apologized for the sudden action. They both learned it was each other’s first kiss. Because he’s awkward, he keeps to himself that he likes it. Naturally, this happens around Gai, Lee, and maybe even Shikamaru to which they’re all looking at him with a shit eating grin.
2. Tenten’s love languages are words of affirmation, quality time, and physical touch. Words of affirmation we can see in the anime; Neji is the one usually praising her for her abilities (in his own way). She also likes to boast about Neji and his abilities to others since she is…always with him (side note: Even though Rock Lee and Pals/Naruto SD is not really cannon, it more of just a gag show to highlight Team Gai in a comedic light and separate the seriousness of the main story; Neji and Lee both praise Tenten quite a lot in this show. They boost her up so much where she’s like “omg me? Really??”.) Kay, back to how they’re always together; Like, c’mon. You mean to tell me that these two aren’t always together just for training? They definitely spend a lot of their days off together. Whenever something pops up they just so happen to appear together? They could be at a tea shop, a hot spring, lying in the grass at the training fields as Neji meditates or Tenten sharpens her kunai. Hell, Tenten’s hobby is fortune telling, she probably reads Neji’s fortune when she’s bored or if he feels like indulging her. If Neji is running errands, or training with Hinata and Hanabi, he will make time to check in on Tenten afterwards and surprise her with her favorite dumplings or sweets. For physical touch, I can see Tenten hanging off of Neji’s shoulders or holding onto his arm when they are together. She also plays with his hair. Neji being awkward, will do no more than hold her hand in public (but even then he didn’t get comfortable with that until after the war). But also, for me, I think about the dream she had and the final scene with Neji:
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It took his touch and his words to get her completely engulfed within the genjutsu. This is the only scene in that whole episode that her eyes are completely dark. She IMMEDIATELY FOLDS TO HIM after all that (granted the build up what her proving and wanting to save everyone with her dream teammates believing her when she claims she’s in a genjutsu but also Neji is alive and I think that’s the first falling point for her, not the saving them part). But thus also tells me that she is completely comfortable with Neji’s touches, probably because when they are alone, he’s casually physically interacting with her and because he’s fucking dead in the main cannon she will miss his touch. shhh let me have this please.
3. They started secretly dating after the second Chunnin exams. I will leave you with this for the explanation:
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The way I fucking SQUEALED at my screen when I played this game and saw this. You can’t tell me SHIT at this point. Let me sink with my ship alright? Neji didn’t deny it either. I think neither of them denied it. I will replay the game just because lol. Nothing gets past Itachi Uchiha, we know this.
3. Shikamaru figured out they were secretly dating right away and he hold a great friendship with Neji to a point. I could see him asking Neji outright if his speculations were true; to which the Hyuga would brush him off until he got tired of the Nara teasing him. When he asked Neji why they were keeping it a secret I could see Neji saying he didn’t want anyone butting into their business. But also, in his shinobi mind, if they made it obvious, it could be dangerous for them if they went on missions; but then, Neji slipped up:
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He didn’t have to, but he did. And continued to hold her until he was certain she was alright. I also have it written in my fan fictions that Shikamaru and Neji share that genius book smart friendship where they can read each other very easily. It’s cannon that Neji is shit at card games and strategy games, which I wouldn’t be surprised if the Hyuga sought advice from Shikamaru for certain things pertaining to his work and Tenten. Shikamaru also is very good at keeping secrets, so Neji and Tenten didn’t have to worry about him blabbing like Gai and Lee. I also think after this scene, Lee and Gai had confronted Neji about him doting on her after she almost drowned in the water prison. BUT ALSO, this is a parallel to the first rounds of chunnin exams! When Temari threw Tenten across the room, Lee caught her. This time, Neji acknowledges that Tenten is at her limit, saves al of them, and goes out of his way to catch her and again continues o hold onto her to make sure she's okay. And it's expensive as hell to animate scenes that drag on like this, and they chose this panel to drag the animation out for. This slow burn was killing me when I saw this episode.
4. Neji is book smart and Tenten is street smart to balance the partnership. Personally, I love that Shikamaru and Tenten share that “street smart” mentality; in the data books Tenten has a higher IQ than both Neji and Lee. She’s very intelligent but would rather have others do the thinking for her “point and I’ll shoot” type of thinking. BUT 👏🏼IN 👏🏼THEM 👏🏼STREETS she is a menace, which is also probably why Neji is always with her to make sure she doesn’t get into trouble while she’s running the block. I could see Shikamaru and Tenten understanding that which leads to a friendship; so to recap, Shikamaru knows, but understands why they’re keeping it under wraps. He’s like the reminder of when the sent of their relationship is in the air/obvious when they are on missions or in public.
5. Neji felt threatened by Sasuke as gennin when Tenten found him cute. She didn’t verbalize it out loud, but he probably knew she would find the Uchiha cute. Since they were young teens when they first took the chunnin exams, it wouldn’t surprise me that Neji was a bit annoyed that Tenten was looking at him, almost as if “how dare he”. I wouldn’t be surprised if the team had spoken about it; Lee probably complaint about how Sakura liked Sasuke and Tenten probably said she though Sasuke was pretty cool, which irritated the fuck out of Neji. The first sign of jealousy, especially if Tenten was bragging about how cool Neji was for the past year when they first became gennin.
6. There was no way Hiashi didn’t pick up on his nephew having a crush. There is also no way Neji did not bring Tenten around his family. There had to have been some interaction with Hiashi where Neji had brought her to the Hyuga compound as gennin, and again as chunnin. I wouldn't be surprised if Tenten watched as Neji trained with Hinata at times and had conversations with Hiashi. For shippuuden purposes, I wouldn't be surprised if Hiashi had brought up Tenten as a potential marriage partner to Neji and his awkward ass was avoiding the topic completely. In Frequency, I have Hiashi bring it up (implying that he has already spoken to his hard-headed awkward ass nephew about it) but in a way where he is directly talking to Tenten, who is there. I believe Hiashi is a character who follows tradition for tradition sake; he is conditioned to do so as head of the clan, but that doesn't mean he agrees with certain things about Hyuga tradition. The fact that he apologized to Neji after seeing his power and understanding why his nephew was angry at the world, he made it a priority to salvage some kind of relationship with his nephew for the sake of his twin brother. When Neji brought Tenten around, he would see that Tenten was some kind of comfort/light for him and decided that Neji should have a choice of who he chose to have in his life and how close; There's a lot of head cannons/assumptions that in order to preserve the Byakugan, they need to inter marry with other clan members, but for me, it's a dominate gene where the eyes change permanently when activated at a young age (low key, fuck how they brought it up in Baruto, Himawari should've had Hinata's eyes and Baruto should've just had the recessive gene). This was another plot hole I wanted to fill and it made sense to me since people were so hell bent on stealing the Hyuga eyes; the clan is very selective of partners but perhaps that is because it is a dominate gene. Sure, they can marry cousins if they want, but I don't see it as a forced marriage situation unless the arrangement is requested for. Hiashi saw Tenten as a great match for Neji, is all I'm saying. Hiashi knew they were secretly dating, in fact he was the on who told them to keep it a secret.
7. Neji's promise to Tenten during the war was of romantic and platonic intentions. He gave her that un-Neji like smile and thumbs up which means he had to had promised her something big in order for him to do that. AND ALSO they had to had been alone when he made her that promise, right? She was the only character who showed that interaction with him. It probably went something like this; Neji and Tenten had a deep conversation about possible out comes of the war, his death, her death, unheal-able damage...etc. I actually see this being a conversation about their feelings and how if one of them kicks the bucket, they would celebrate their life instead of mourning their death (which is hard) but Neji would prefer Tenten to keep his memory alive, not fixate on his demise. Neji probably also promised Tenten to be by her side always and maybe even promised her his heart (idk on the fence on this one but it would go with them secretly dating headcannon). In the video game, you will run into Tenten still in her feelings about Neji's death after the war. She was probably processing that conversation all over again and now that he was physically gone, she had to come to terms with the fact that she was now alone and had to force herself to move forward. I absolutely loathed how Lee was written to have the most emotional reaction and Tenten and Gai just brushed it off a bit. To make myself feel better, Tenten was probably in Neji's arms, crying her eyes out denying that anything would happen to them and then he made his promise to her that after the war, they would be together as fate willed it to; they've been together all this time. I can see Tenten releasing all of her feeling with Neji himself and him trying to comfort her of any overthinking she was experiencing. He also remined her that she is a very capable ninja and can hold her own without him. WHICH SHE DID IN THE WAR. (I'm still salty about Hinata's meat-bag no jutsu and how Kishi was like MMMMMM Neji can go. But then, proceed to make Tenten single and have promotions where Neji and Tenten were displayed as a matching couple with SasuSaku and NaruHina. Then have the audacity to state that he regretted killing off Neji? Fucking tear my heart out, how could he do my girl dirty.)
In my own au, Neji does go through with his promise of remaining by her side. Between my fics Radio (Trigger warning on this one it's a heavy and unfortunate situation of them as ANBU) and Frequency (The sequel of them picking up the pieces).
Part 3 will be the spicey headcannons; please stay tuned for my continuous delulu train. Also, message me about your thoughts, I'm open to a lot of other ideas even if they disagree with mine. That's the whole point of a fandom to be honest; everyone if free to have their opinions, this is just mine based on the cannon we are given.
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jelestes · 5 months ago
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My completely sane and hinged rant after rewatching the second season of The Bear 😍
• Carmy/Claire
OMG I want to like Claire so badly but her character is so fucking annoying and that’s putting my whole sydcarmy shipper personality aside, she adds nothing to the plot/show, nothing to Carmy’s growth as a character (not that she should be responsible for that, but as a part of his subplot she doesn’t do much), no new perspectives, nothing. She has nothing you can hold on to she’s just kinda there. Her personality is bland and she’s pushy but at least she’s nice i’ll give her that! All that being said, Molly Gordon (the actress) did a great job!
• Natalie
Natalie isn’t talked about enough and it makes me so angry because she’s such a fascinating character like what was ep6??? that girl needs a fucking hug. As a woman with mommy issues I get Nat on so many levels (like, my mom also has threatened to blown her brains out in front of me so many times lmao) we only got a glimpse to what her life was/is like and I was already bawling my eyes out can’t imagine what they have in store for the next seasons. Also kudos to Abby Elliot (the actress) for the amazing job, we got to see so many sides of Nat it was so refreshing. (Ps: LOVE her relationship with Syd, omg)
• Tina
I remember hating Tina the first two episodes but man how much do I love her now. Her character just warms my heart, love LOVE that they made her a sous.
• Richie
I love cousin so fucking much. That’s pretty much it. As a twenty something struggling to find my passion and my path in general his plot in the second season really hit me, also his growth as a character in general was so nice to see, the way he realized he had to change to love himself not tiff or anyone else, that was really really cool.
• Richie/Natalie
Now call me absolutely insane but why do I feel there’s a tension between them? the whole soda thing when she says she’s pregnant (there’s a parallel to when Tiff was pregnant in 3.06), when he apologizes (it doesn’t feel he’s just apologizing for something in the present), idk there’s been a tension there since season one and I think it might be addressed in season 3? idk I might be delusional but I can’t be the only one seeing it.
• Carmy/Syd
* sighs * BECAUSE IF I SEE SOMEONE CALL THAT SHIT PLATONIC ONE MORE TIME I-
Can someone rationally explain to me why is Sydney the only person who can calm Carmy down during a panic attack? How is this shit platonic be so fr right now!!!! Why was Sydney over explaining herself when she told Carmy she doesn’t feel jealous of Claire? Try to explain this to me. You can’t because saying this is platonic sound fucking stupid SPECIALLY after the table scene.
IMO, they both know it and they both refuse to acknowledge it but specially carmy. I feel like they gonna have a fall out on s3 so they can finally start building this in the right direction.
That’s pretty much it, thank you for coming to my ThebearTalk! I’ll be insufferable for the next few weeks <3
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rekino2114 · 2 months ago
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Omg the recent episode for despair time😭😭😭 not to mention the ending with Teruko. We totally need Teruko with a boyfriend who's just always there for and reassuring her that he loves her and will never leave her no matter what.
You saving teruko from her execution
A/n:I know this isn't exactly what you asked for, but come on, this was too good of a fic opportunity to pass up. Sorry if this isn't what you wanted but I hope you still like it
Yes, this is the second drdt post in a row, but writing is my coping mechanism, and with how much trauma chapter 2 gave me You're probably gonna see more fics about it
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The second trial had finally ended. After hours of discussion, you had finally figured out that ace was the culprit, the one who killed arei, and so you voted for him accordingly. You wanted nothing more than to go back to your room and hug teruko after all of this,You both were gonna need comfort after seeing another person......you just didn't know how much-needed it truly would have been.
While it was sudden at first you had no problems with teruko's plan and were actually pretty excited for it, any hope of getting you two out of this hell, no matter how small, was a good one for you and you were going to follow it.
It all started relatively well, ace managed to punch monotv, and the robot seemingly shut down before rebooting. That wasn't what shocked you,You knew there was a very high chance that it wouldn't work, but what really surprised and scared you was what he said after that
Since Ace was already going to be executed, the host decided to pass down his punishment to the one who had the idea to hurt him........teruko
"To conclude, I will now proceed with the execution of teruko tawaki"
The moment you heard those words, you froze, and when the gun came out of the floor, you could do nothing but stare at it.
Monotv started counting down and teruko......stood there, she didn't do anything she didn't even try to run or save herself even with all of you screaming at her
"What's the point I should have known this would happen, even if I shield myself behind others,even if I search for an escape, it always comes down to this, I need to face the consequences of my actions there's no escaping that"
"What are you talking about? You're going to be killed!"
"Killed? I doubt it. As if something so kind could happen to me. I won't die even if monotv puts 100 bullets in my body. I'll only be badly injured, possibly lose a body part. Maybe I'll even end up in a coma for months, but I won't die, I never will. There's nothing I can do but accept my fate. It's what I deserve after all"
"Teruko! run! please!"
"Don't worry everyone. I'll show you what it means to be the ultimate lucky student"
"Zero"
The gun fired, and blood covered everything, even teruko's clothes.......your blood
"Y-y/n! What happened?"
"I-i tried to get in front of the gun but he beat me to it"
Teruko stood silent, watching your body fall in front of her. She didn't know what to do, she didn't know what to say. She didn't know what to think. This wasn't supposed to happen.
Right now, she was supposed to be writhing in pain, almost passing out but not to the point where she couldn't feel the terrible pain, but somehow, seeing you bleeding out on the ground knowing it was her fault felt even more painful than every accident she'd ever been in
Her luck killed you
She killed you
"Ahahahahahaha of course, of fucking course"
"T-teruko?"
"I should have known this would happen, of course. It would have been too kind to even make me suffer that much. You just had to kill the only person I love"
Not even teruko herself knew who she was talking to, maybe her luck, maybe monotv, maybe whatever fate was responsible for her existence of pure suffering. She was just completely breaking down without you
"Don't worry I shut off the gun as soon as I detected that y/n was in the way, his injuries are not fatal"
"Not fatal? Is he alive?"
"He's barely breathing, he's not going to be alive for much longer-"
".............he's......still alive?"
".......Yes, he could live theoretically but only if he gets immediate treatment"
Teruko didn't know what to think. On one hand, this was probably another layer of her suffering, giving her the hope that you would live just to crush her completely when that hope was revealed to be false but on the other hand, what would she say to you if she didn't follow that hope? If she just gave up right here without even trying. She loved you more than anything, even more than herself. If you were going to die, then she at least had to try and save you.
"Get him to the infirmary now!"
Everyone was surprised by teruko's authoritative tone, but carried your body to the elevator
"Monotv open the door"
"I'm sorry, but the participants can only leave the trial grounds once the class trial is complete, that includes the death of the blackened"
As everyone argued about what to do, teruko's cold voice made them all silent
".........ace"
"NO FUCK NO, I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE ABOUT TO SAY"
"If you're so scared of being executed. Then I can solve that problem for you"
Teruko pulled her knife out of her pocket and pointed it at him with an unhinged expression on her face
"I don't think it matters if you get executed or not.......you just have to die right?"
"t-teruko you can't mean"
"Don't do it!"
"It's your choice, I'll make it quick. That's my objective after all
"......Y-YOU'RE INSANE.....YOU THINK HIS LIFE IS WORTH MORE THAN MINE!?"
"........yes"
"......!"
"Teruko? What are you saying? Why are you doing this?"
"Because.............I CAN'T LOSE Y/N"
Her yelling caught everyone off guard but they were too scared to say anything to her
"that would mean I once again caused the death of another person I loved......I-I can't deal with that again......especially since it's y/n"
"........."
"Ace, you're about to die anyway, If you really want to make things right, if you really want to at least be able to face arei in the afterlife, then die to let another person live"
"..........You're so selfish"
".............."
"But I guess I was too wasn't I?"
"A-ace"
"I'm so scared.....I'm so fucking scared I might start crying right now, bit if I really have to die.....I GUESS I'LL GO OUT DOING SOMETHING GOOD FOR ONCE IN MY GODDAMN LIFE!"
Ace got executed, and the elevator door opened as a result, Levi carried your body to it while everyone else followed him....except teruko
"T-teruko, what are you doing? Come here!"
".......no I'm staying here"
"W-what?"
"Wait before you leave though, I need to say something......Arturo If you dare let y/n die, then I'll kill you myself"
"!"
"That's a promise"
Teruko's words sent a shiver down the plastic surgeon's spine, but soon the door closed, and she was left alone with monotv, she talked with him for a while before he shut off the lights and left her truly alone, that was when she cried.....in the dark,alone. teruko almost never cried, even you had never really seen her do that, she told herself that she went trough too much suffering and despair to cry over it, she needed to be strong to face whatever tragedy her luck would bring her and to protect you from all of them but today she failed.
No matter the result, nothing would be the same. If you died, then teruko would keep her promise and be executed as a result, but even then, she most likely would not have seen you again, the execution would have somehow failed and left her in a state of complete suffering and despair, she would wish for death to see you again but she would have never gotten that luxury
And if you would survive, then you would surely hate her. She was the reason why you almost died after all, that would make you realize that being with her would just lead to you dying or being close to death and you would break up with her, she really couldn't blame you, in fact the worst part about this was she couldn't blame anything, she couldn't blame her luck, she couldn't blame fate, she could only blame herself.
When she got back to the living quarters, the first thing she did was ask Arturo about your condition. She was relieved that you had survived, but only because she didn't want to dirty her clothes in blood twice the same day. She vowed to stay with you until the moment you woke up, both because she didn't want anyone to try and kill you when you were vulnerable and because she wanted to be the first one to see you open your eyes.
She barely ate and always stood in a chair next to the bed in the infirmary, she talked to basically only eden and Charles as those were the only ones who weren't scared that she'd randomly try to stab them because of grief, she even slept there still holding your hand desperately wishing it would wrap around her own.
And one day it did
"Y-y/n, you're awake! Are you ok? Do I need to call Arturo?"
"N-no I'm fine, I think, It still kinda hurts but I'm fine now"
"Ok, I'm glad"
Silence followed. You were still getting used to being conscious again, and teruko didn't know how to start the conversation
"........why did you get in front of me?"
"Hm?"
"Why did you save me? I told you I wasn't going to die"
".........cause I can't bear to see you suffer anymore"
"W-what?"
"Every time you're in pain, it hurts me to see you like that, after everything you've been through in your life, you deserve to be happy teru, I know that I sound selfish saying this but your happiness is the most important thing in the world to me......even more than my life"
"...........do you think you seeing you dead will make me happy?"
"U-uh?"
"Sorry if I'm aggressive but.....You're wrong, the most pain someone could give me is taking you away from me. You're literally the only thing I have left, my family, my friends, they all left me, you're the only person I love that is still with me.......why?"
"What do you mean?"
"Why are you still with me? If you stay, then you'll probably end the same as every other person I loved. Today was an example of that. It's better that you leave me, for your own safety, I hate seeing you hurt, so please leave me"
"...........teruko, I'll never leave you"
"....w-why? You'll get killed if you do, i-my luck will kill you"
"........because I love you"
"......."
"What you said before, about the worst pain that you could even feel is me being taken away from you, that's exactly how I feel towards you"
"......you really do?"
"Of course teru, I love you so so so much, don't I always tell you"
"But I'm-"
"No, teruko, stop it. Stop blaming yourself, I will never leave you. That's a promise , no matter whatever your luck throws at me, I promise I will always find a way to come back, because I love you, and my love is stronger than whatever your luck is"
Teruko cried once again, no matter how much she tried to keep her tears in she couldn't stop it
"I.....I......I'm sorry"
"For what?"
"For everything, for dragging you into my life, hell the reason why you're in this killing game is probably because of me"
"Teru-"
"But if even knowing that,you still love me, if even despite everything you still want to be with me, then I promise I will protect you"
"........"
"My luck.....it's always been a curse, ripping the people I loved from me and always leaving me in pure despair but now, now that I have someone who knowing that still wants to love me, I will not let it take you no matter what"
"........thank you teruko"
She wiped her tears with her wrist and looked back at you
"No, thank you for being in my life"
Teruko stood up from the chair
"I'm going to tell Arturo you woke up and get you some water ok?"
"Yeah thanks"
She started walking away, but turned to look at you one more time, this time with a smile on her face
"......I love you too, you have no idea how much"
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ju-nebugg · 25 days ago
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absolutely wrecked by hohr episode 46 and i can’t figure out where to put all of my thoughts so i’m gonna yell into the void here
below the cut because spoilers <3
UFCKKKKFUCK FUCK FUCK FUCKK omg my sweet darling lovely boys oh god oh pls be okay pls pls be alright
like legitimately i’m so worried, i know they’ve been on one life beforehand but smth about henley losing that glove feels really precarious and i don’t think dave will actually kill one of them but this is BAD, GUYS
first of all, brilliant episode. wonderful acting, horrible rolls, great all around. fantastic job.
second of all, i’m so angry at them because they are lovely and make me want to CRY.
my god these two love each other so much and it’s been great to watch the evolution of that but oh my GOD this one just really hit home. it might just be the tone of voice or maybe i’m just overthinking it but the tenderness in this episode was so amazing, you could just HEAR the care they have for one another.
and then we get to the fucking torture scenes and oh my goodness. gluebrick saying that the way they should torture henley is with flowers and tickles and “nice, friendly things”. henley saying that the best way to torture gluebrick was to hurt HIM, and then that immediately being proved true when they start beating him up and gluebrick panics. they go to hurt gluebrick and henley says that it won’t bother him, which chris at first took offense to but was actually henley’s attempt to dissuade them because he hoped they’d think it wouldn’t be a successful tactic and they’d leave gluebrick alone. the utter TERROR in chris’s voice when they cut off the glove, and immediately giving up on the plan and offering information (that he didn’t have) so long as they spared him.
also, when gluebrick’s tail gets cut off, he’s immediately sad that they aren’t tail buddies anymore. once he’s reminded that henley still doesn’t have a tail, he quickly shifts and is very excited to be “tail-less buddies.” the whole tail buddy saga throughout the whole series is fucking adorable. anyways.
“you know i believe in you, right? you know i think you can handle anything?” and henley betting his son’s soul on gluebrick winning the fight against tyson because “i believe in you.” just gonna leave that there.
and then henley escapes. very henley moment, we worry if he’s gonna make the selfish choice and break out, but he gets all of their things and starts to head back. while he’s doing so, he’s chanting his little “everything’s fine” mantra, which we know is completely false and is his automatic response to any bad feelings he’s dealing with, so he’s clearly upset. he’s desperately trying to hold it together until he can fix this.
dave gives him the option of completing their mission, of going into that “important room” and finding the documents. henry specifically says that making the decision to go to the room would be for the “greater good”, but he decides against it. gluebrick is more important to him then the resistance and, consequently, the layer as a whole. and it’s phrased almost like a no-brainer. ughgghhfgfhhhhhhh. that whole moment felt very much like the bit from the end of byebarian when we got the 5-seconds-forward thing and gluebrick saw that henley was going to die, and made his decision to sacrifice himself without needing to think. these two are so ready to throw everything away for each other GODDDDDDDDD don’t get me started about that episode i could on for HOURS
and THEN we have our lovely little reunion, the utter joy of “you came back for me” and the straightforward “of course,” henley trying to justify it as him not being able to complete the mission by himself, and gluebrick immediately acknowledging how much they mean to each other. “it’s nice to know that someone loves you as much as you love them.” henley doesn’t refute this. he instead just says “you don’t need to make a whole thing out of it,” and then they do their whole masculine awkward brushing it off thing. gluebrick suggests a high five in place of holding tails, and before they can even do that it’s almost like he can’t STOP HIMSELF from hugging henley (chris??? the line delivery on that bit?? HEARTBREAKING). they’re VERY annoyed when their moment is interrupted, but immediately jump into action to finish the job.
AND THEN WE GET TO THE FINAL SCENE. henley is trying to find the documents, and is failing. gluebrick gets taken down. instead of using his final round of action to potentially save the integrity of the resistance, henley leaps to try and help him. yes, he fails, but the decision was made. and they’re both pinned to the ground, reaching for each other as they get put under once again.
just…..the GROWTH. gluebrick realizing that his purpose in life is to use his strength to protect people and deciding that he’d literally do anything for his friends (“my happy boys are my everything” from ep 41). henley, while he may not be great at saying it outright, has accepted how important the happy boys are to him and would offer himself up for torture in gluebrick’s place. the fact that we went from “we need to have a conversation about gluebrick” to THIS is insane. criminal levels of sweetness. they’re so STUPID and they LOVE EACH OTHER SO MUCH. it’s sickening. i’m obsessed.
and you just KNOW that whatever happens next it’s gonna hurt even more. we’re gonna have yet another rescue mission, and i’m just hoping that these two idiots can keep each other safe in the meantime.
fucking hell.
anyways. just needed to get that out somewhere. prob gonna add to this later, bc this podcast is all i think about. goodnight all.
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crispycreambacon · 8 months ago
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You fill your head with thoughts you find you can't even feel
Try to make room in your skull, but it’s full of them
All of the things that you think and then think about thinking
I know it’s hard, but they're not who you are
They're white noise
— White Noise, Will Wood —
Welcome one and all to "Mashing Two Interests Like Playdough", the first episode is Puppet History x Will Wood, specifically the Substitute x White Noise 'cause holy moly. It fits him so well. Omg.
I had so much fun creating this poster! I'm really proud of how the poses and the rendering turned out even though both gave me a rough time at first </3 I actually had an earlier version of this poster, but I scrapped it because it wasn't doing it for me ngl :,D I'm glad I did though!
Anyways if you'd like to know more about why I think this song fits the Substitute, you can read my interpretation of the lyrics and how they can relate to him below the "Read More" button. You can also find the glitchless + filterless version of the poster there.
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Note: A lot of this is speculation on my part, and you don't need to conform to this reading. This is just how I perceive him.
They paint the walls with colors that you're not meant to notice
They fill the halls with tunes you can't get into your head
Let's establish the obvious: The Substitute can't feel. The extent of his unfeelingness is unknown, but what is known is that he can't taste and can't have the sensation of touch. This may lead to him being isolated due to his inability to relate to experiences both humans and his fellow puppets seem to have, particularly the experiences of the one he is based on.
Yeah, it sorta sounds like a retro top-40 but wrong
You're not meant to sing along
It isn't that kind of song
It's white noise
Despite his unfeelingness, he still wants to have the experiences others have. After all, he literally almost killed someone just to have that chance, but his plan is not entirely well-thoughout. How was he going to dispose Ryan's body without getting caught? How was he going to sew the skin onto himself and dispose the rest of it? What was he going to do after he finally what he asked for?
In a way, he was doomed to fail. He was never meant to gain sentience anyway, let alone have the desire to feel like his counterpart. His existence is a complete accident. Now he has to deal with the consequences of actions he never even had a hand in doing.
But if you listen closely I swear, to God I swear
You can hear the ocean if you hold it up to your ear
This lyric directly inspired the pose of the Substitute listening to the conch shell. He has memories of some of the most wonderful sensations on Earth yet he can't connect with any of them. Perhaps when no one was looking, he tries to recreate some of them in a desperate attempt to find a scrap of semblance of feeling and gets increasingly frustrated with his inability to understand them.
Is it any wonder that he would do anything to regain that scrap of enjoyment? To end his torturous experience by any means necessary?
Its personality's a lack of identity
The entire second verse in general speaks about the meaningless of art and how people try to give it meaning anyway. The Substitute's only purpose was to replace the Professor either to console a dead mass or to continue the show. Now that the Professor is back... What can he do?
Moreover, he's also never allowed to have an identity of his own. Since he's meant to be a perfect copy of someone else, especially someone who's presumed to be dead, he can never really deviate from that role because it would break the illusion the puppets created to cope with their grief. No matter what his desires are, he can never really explore any of them because no one is allowing him to do so.
Also, the way the orchestra swells during this part kinda calls back to theatrical music for me. I feel like the Substitute would enjoy performace arts. His bombastic musical number implies he had a flair for the dramatics, and despite his lack of feeling, his expression of his ambitions is quite dramatic.
You fill your head with thoughts you find you can't even feel
This can relate to how the Subtitute is forced to relive the memories of the Professor despite not being able to experience the emotions connected with them. In a way, he has to so that he could remind himself of his motivations. Remembering the joy the Professor got through feeling would keep him going on this path in the hopes that some day, he could feel that joy too.
I know it's hard
But they're not who you are
They're white noise
This line can be taken in two ways. One is based on the speculated official meaning of the outro which is centered on intrusive thoughts. No doubt the Substitute deals with homicidal thoughts, but I wonder if he truly believes in them. Does he genuinely enjoy indulge in them, or does he act on them because it's all that he knows? For all the talk about him having the Professor's memories, at the end of the day, he was crudely coded for one simple purpose. His thoughts are very simplistic—as seen with how quickly he jumps to murder as the most logical solution for his problem—and I wonder if he was given a chance to grow beyond his purpose, he could've reliazed that homocide was not the right course of action.
The other way, which is likely more relevant, relates back to the Substitute being intrinsically tied to the Professor. His thoughts, his memories and his actions are all in a way influenced by the Professor. But it didn't have to be this way. As unlikely as it is, he could've had a life where he discovered his own interests and his own personality outside of being "the evil Professor". If he had gotten to learn more about the world on his own, if he had been able to act not as the Professor but as himself, he would've been able to develop more and find that joy he was missing. He could've had a life.
Unfortunately, he was never given that chance, and it is unlikely that he ever will be.
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befuddledcinnamonroll · 5 months ago
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The rare episode 13! Let's see how we go.
Ok, yes, this is cute, but all I can think of is how at my age, if I slept like this, my back would be so fucked.
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I do love how much they love being together. This is what matters, not if/when they choose to put a label on things.
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This man is never going to be sending mixed messages, and I love him for it.
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It's so funny to me how I did not connect with Winny & Satang in MSP, but now I am so in love with them both.
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Not that they were at all bad in MSP, I just really feel these characters so much more. And I do think the time they've spent together since then shows in the chemistry.
Ok, this is such a little detail, but part of why I love this show.
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Because Toey knew Q & Peem through mentoring & the art program, and he knew Phum & Fang from childhood, but he met Pun via all the rest, and yet they are clearly friends who are comfortable teasing one another. Just like Beer showing up here to practice with Chain & Q - he's friends with them regardless of Phum. Friendship, and found family, and the fact that you can just keep growing these relationships into this beautiful tree of connection when you find your people... it's so lovely.
This honestly makes me curious about New's friendships, because I feel like he must have some absolutely wonderful people in his life, and that makes me happy.
Y'know Chain, you wouldn't need to be so obsessed with other people's relationships if you just smooshed the man right in front of you.
All the friend teasing is so adorable. Also Phuwin is the king of perfect facial expressions.
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CHAIN!!! Stop being cute and just hit on him directly already!!
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Poor baby Pun is so confused, he does not have the braincells to understand this level of flirting.
Omg, can we talk about how beautifully Tan & Fang match while keeping their own aesthetics?!
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Goddamn I love this show!!
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The love rival is a fully formed human who is not just there for drama (and Title is nailing the balance of slightly bothersome but also rather sweet), he respects Peem's autonomy and asks for consent, and we're reinforcing that self love should come above adoration for another! Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Hmmm, normally I don't like "misunderstandings" as a contrivance to keep couples apart, but I feel like it fits here. There's still a disconnect in the emotional intimacy between these two, and they can't be boyfriends until they figure out how to navigate it. Peem wants to be someone Phum can rely on unconditionally, and be completely vulnerable with, but Phum still struggles with seeing people's love for him as conditional, and thinks that doing the wrong thing can "ruin" a relationship.
Always, always there. The true love story of this show.
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You two are killing me.
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Please don't make us wait until the last episode. I can't take it!
Oh dear, Phum is so emotionally fragile... not sure playing games with him is a good idea, Q.
How is Toey is the emotionally mature one here?
Holy shit, y'all, this scene. This show just told the misunderstanding trope to go fuck itself!
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The openness, the vulnerability, the honesty, the communication. The showing of what genuine love and caring looks like. I'm crying.
Toey, you are such a goof, but I love you anyway.
Lol, realizing Peem isn't just a dom but also a little bit of a sadist explains a lot.
Cuuuuute.
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Ooh, I like this framing.
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Ha, I really thought they were going to cliffhanger Peem's response. This show has been such a tease so many times.
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raceweek · 1 year ago
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Hey what happened in the 2020 season with Alex? (Sorry new fan and still learning)
omg you never need to apologise to me for not knowing things i literally know nothing
the 2020 season from the alexnation perspective was like being in a hamster ball being hurled around for 5 months straight basically but here’s the breakdown:
so for context 2019 was really really good for alex he was promoted as a rookie and he shunted a fair few times and most of the time wasn’t on maxs quali pace but red bull were the third quickest team so he wasn’t expected to win or anything. alex ultimately beat pierres points tally from his 12 races in the red bull within 7 as a rookie so like. whilst it was insane behaviour for red bull to promote him in the first place he did perform phenomenally
then we turn to 2020 pre season testing. mercedes was dominant as per (dreamy sigh) and the red bull was quick but looked. edgy. for both alex and max but ferrari were fucking nowhere so it was still like really positive for red bull bc it was basically two extra places gained and then. global pandemic. and then as a footnote to the whole you know. global pandemic. sebastian vettel was dumped from the love island villa (ferrari (everyone gasped))
and then! triple header one and the first race in austria had max running an upgraded front wing and none for alex and it was like understood i think like it wasn’t a big deal at the time
and then everything that could have possibly happened. happened. in the race and alex and lewis…yeah. but the world did in fact keep spinning!
and then alex got p4 in the second austria race (altho. significantly off of maxs pace in p3 for sureee) and everyone was like if only max had a rear gunner (wistful) which in my opinion is an insult to lewis and the w11 but whatever. nothing else really happened here other than horner and marko making kissy faces at seb during this time but that’s just contextfkdkd
so then the next race in hungary alex qualified p13 and even though max only qualified p7 and it was the third race of the season alex was getting eaten alive and george was on live tv like red bull are making him look like an idiot and he’s not an idiot and they need to fix it for him and it was like fucking hell what is going ONNN we haven’t even made it to the third race yet (like imagine anyone coming out and declaring this after australia quali this year like. wild scenes)
so then one week break and then triple header two started and during the races at silverstone they start talking in the media about when the best time to demote alex is even though the only times he’d finished outside the top six was brazil 2019 and austria 2020 which. pls consult youtube if you need further info here
they also changed alexs race engineer in silverstone so More turbulence altho completely welcome this time (simon rennie come back we love u, ur so sexc haha x)
then during the final triple header 2 race in barcelona he gets put on the most ass strategy known to man like with context this was criminal behaviour actually
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and then one week break and then triple header 3 starts (do you feel like a hamster yet) at spa and unbeknownst to us all at the time but later confirmed by will buxton and dts horner is in the mf pitlane in spa propositioning seb like one more year and then you can come home which. have some decorum alex is behind you in the garage. but anyway in the general media everyone was gagging for pierre’s red bull return so there were bigger fish
anyway. SPA. they did this to my boy
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and alex made the best out of it but as per the comeback kid episode of dts that everyone loves (🙃) alex was made out to be useless and it was like. wtf did you expect
THEN between spa and monza helmut marko was like oh btw alex hasn’t actually had the same parts as max for most races this year okay bye and alexnation was like…wtf. but then no one else really cared and it was like UMMM OKAY
and then monza happened and alex was in a first lap sandwich involving pierre and then second lap crashed into grosjean (alexs fault - live laugh love x) and had a huge chunk of his floor missing so finished p nowhere and then. pierre won and good for her i guess but then ex drivers were on live tv demanding alex step down for pierre which like no one has ever done this in the history of the sport as far as im aware so it was fucking savage especially when this was the first race alex had finished outside of the points for red bull in (with the exception of the two aforementioned events)
and then mugello wooooooooooooo!! alexs first podium!!!!!! i was gassed at the time but it was sort of sad looking back like if you listen to his team radio across the line from getting p7 in canada and then compare it to his first podium in mugello it’s. yeah! we were enduring it!!
and then sochi happened in its own weird bubble and alex was nowhere really got caught behind carlos hitting the wall at the first corner after a poor quali and that was that
then. triple header number four starts with horner giving alex an ultimatum of we’re backing you but we want results in the next three races or ur finished hunny which. okay
then first race of the triple header max ends up blocking alex in his quali run (live laugh love 2.0 x) and then:
YEAH
nurburgring was the they race me so hard incident. available to view elsewhere bc god knows im not reliving that!!
imola was again nightmarish. red bull media team said alex was working with a mental coach (patrick his trainer had got mental health qualifications basically) and was supporting him etc which. here comes paul di resta live on air laughing about how max wouldn’t need mental support. it was once again. brutal. especially bc he was getting a load of xenophobic abuse online already like fuck off
back on the track alex basically spun on his own but thought he had been hit and no one thought to tell him before he went into the media pen that he hadn’t actually been hit so it was fucking awkward and yeah twitter was brutal again
then istanbul happened. red bull looked promising but both max and alex finished well off so it was just whatever really lewis did a madness no one really cared about red bull
then final three races of the season started with the grosjean crash in bahrain which ended with alex on the podium and then checo won sakhir and alex wasn’t really there and then we were at the final race in abu dhabi where red bull officially signed checo (as confirmed by will buxtons analysis of the curtains. god i can’t believe this season was real)
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but alex didn’t find out for like two weeks later when the season was well and truly over and was taking drinks to the factory for everyone and it was heartbreaking and then he didn’t have a seat and spent the next year saying it killed him so. yeah…TA-DA
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knitnightstudio · 1 year ago
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We've made it to 2x3! everyone breathe! This one is gonna be fun, i promise.
We see the emerald clearly for the first time. We get a few shots in the beginning of the episode, more then the last 2 combined. But It's when Ed is leaning on the staff and telling Hornigold the reasons he wants to live that we get a good long shot of it.
Warmth, good food, intercourse, orgasms. All things Ed wants from Stede. This scene is from far away, we aren't being let in yet, but Ed is opening up a little and being pretty freakin clear about who and what he needs.
Ed isn't hiding the ring anymore. Even before he knows he's in the gravy basket he's suddenly being a lot more open with his left hand.
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Look at that stance. We haven't seen Ed stand this open all season.
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To me this is the most interesting scene. Ed's hands are clear for a very long time.
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But look at these 2 shots closely. The emerald ring is completely backwards. The band alone makes the ring look like a traditional wedding ring.
At first I wasn't sure if it was just a fluke that wasn't caught in editing, but there is a scene cut between these 2 images, and the ring is STILL backwards.
That makes me feel like it was intentional. The show wants us to see this ring as a wedding ring, why else would they not have had Taika Waititi fix it between the two takes?
I'm not a film student so I could be totally off, but it struck me as interesting. I'd love to hear from someone who knows more about this stuff.
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This is such a long scene and we see the emerald for all of it. Suddenly we have gone from Ed hiding it from everyone, including us, to him wanting us to see it, all be it from a distance. This is the first time you can actually see the ring if you're not pausing everytime Ed's left hand appears
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And then we have the other amazing scene from this episode
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Ed sees the light when Stede removes the cloth from his face and the rope that was previously tied tight around his waist just falls away, like magic. Merman Stede appears and we HEAR THE RING BANGING THE FUCK AROUND BECAUSE OMG ED HAS HIS STEDE BACK.
We hear Kate Bush's This Woman's Work
"I know you have a little life in you yet I know you have a lot of strength left I know you have a little life in you yet I know you have a lot of strength left
I should be crying but I just can't let it show I should be hoping but I can't stop thinking
Of all the things I should've said That I never said All the things we should've done Though we never did All the things I should've given But I didn't Oh, darling, make it go Make it go away
Give me these moments back Give them back to me Give me that little kiss"
And with that loud banging of an emerald ring all our moments are back.
also interesting parallel between the Kate Bush lyrics and Ed's song from 1/10 "Just let go, Make yourself let go, Make it go away"
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spaceorphan18 · 5 months ago
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Ahh, I didn't know you liked Bridgerton! (I was away from tumblr for a moment and just now catching up on your blog) I'm obsessed with Penelope and Colin. How did you like season 3? I always love reading your thoughts! I saw so many people complain but I mostly really enjoyed it. I wish it didn't have so many random plotlines, and I didn't like the insta-baby but overall they're my favourite couple in the show haha.
Hi Nonny! Welcome back to the Tumblr! <3
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I hope you don't mind me indulging a little with your ask, lol. If you've followed me for any length of time, you do know I can't shut up - but I realized I haven't really said my actual thoughts on the season, etc, I just started meta'ing and haven't looked back. So, pull up a chair, Nonny, as I chatter non-stop for a bit about Bridgerton and my thoughts on season 3, lol.
I'll put it under a cut to save the rest of your souls....
Part 1: How did we get here?
Am I big fan of historical romance? No, not really. Did I expect this show to ever have a grip on me? Not even a little bit. How in the world did this happen? Idk - it appears that favorite tropes and character designs and dynamics seem to transcend genre. And I'm an old sap.
The tl:dr version is that I watched Seasons 1 and 2 after Season 2 came out. It was fine. Not a huge fan of Season 1, I did like Season 2 though. And then kind of forgot it existed. Eloise was by far my favorite character - because I liked her spunk. And the friendship between Eloise and Penelope was the best part of the show.
And then I was reminded that Season 3 dropped and did not expect the shock that I got. I went in completely blind - I hadn't seen a single promo. I did know, because I looked up the books when I originally watched, that it would be Pen and Colin's story. But I was kind of fascinated at how they were going to go about it. Penelope was not a stereotypical leading lady. And Colin was very boy-ish looking in the early seasons. How was this going to work?
Oh man, the glow ups. The glow ups got me. Pen is so, so gorgeous this entire season. When she's wearing her hair down, omg... Or that one look where she's like a housewife writing in her journal. God damn, girl. She can get it. And then Colin... ha. When he got out of the carriage, I was like - oh shit. It was the pirate coat. A good pirate coat will always do me in.
But more than that - really, the dynamics of the characters just really sold me. I love friends to lovers. I love the angst and the pull. I love the whole she fell first he fell harder. I love that I unintentionally just go for the same kind of characters and their dynamics over and over and over.
And then, you know, between the first part and second part, I rewatched the first two seasons, which was helpful. (Though, still not a huge fan of season 1.) Was addicted to the promo tour (my god I love a good promo tour). And @ckerouac - got me to watch Derry Girls which really cemented my love of Nicola Coughlin. And, you know, once you start going down a hole, you just have to keep on going until you get to the other side.
Idk how we really got here, Nonny, but here we are! Lol
Part 2: My thoughts on Season 3
So, briefly, I just fell in love with Part 1 right off the bat. LOVED IT. Part 2, honestly, I felt disappointed after seeing it the first time. (I remember episode 6, in particular, thinking - wow that was not a very good episode).
And then... I rewatched it and then rewatched it again after watching Seasons 1 and 2 and kind of started to take it a part a bit, and it's grown on me. A lot! I actually do really love the season as a whole and appreciate what we've got...
Breaking it down a little more:
Pen and Colin's story: I still do think the first half is stronger. The whole Colin helping Pen find a husband, Lord Debling (who is a doll), Colin figuring out his issues, that carriage scene... ooff, all really, really good. The second half - there just needed to be more. At first, it was hard to watch them go through a wedding while being mad at each other, but I feel like now that I've had time to digest it all, it is /so/ good. It's a really, really fascinating dynamic going on there. I could and probably will go on at length about it later... a couple of things, though
They just needed more. The plot was so delicious. I did love the conflict over lady whistledown and I wish we had seen that tension played out better and resolved better. The end of episode 8 was a bit to fast. I swear - Season 4 better have some solidly good Polin moments or idek... They've been such a big part of the show as a whole, I hope they get to continue their development, even if it they go back to their Seasons 1 and 2 focus.
The season works better if you remember what happened in seasons 1 and 2. I had zero memory of the plots from the first two seasons going in. I didn't realize Colin's personality had changed. I couldn't remember any of the Polin moments in the first two seasons. This third season makes a whole lot more sense being built from what came before it, and honestly, I kind of love that. It makes the story more layered and engaging.
As for the insta-baby, I mean, they set it up at the beginning of the season, but it wasn't something I needed to enjoy the couple. I do wonder if they'll go back and explore that 9 months, or if things will pick up after post-baby.
Also, on perhaps a shallower note? I thought the actors had great chemistry. And I have so much respect for Nicola Coughlin for allowing herself to be presented in such a way. She is GORGEOUS in every aspect and the backlash over her body is ABSURD. If you can’t get on board that a larger woman can be seen as desirable than you can fuck right off because she is amazing.
Poor Luke Newton has gotten some push back, too, which I think is a little unfair. He's not expressive the way Jonny Bailey is, but Colin really isn't Anthony, and is much more an inward character. And the awkwardness of his attempt at rake-ishness in the beginning is supposed to be awkward. Colin isn't smoldering like the Duke from Season 1, either. He's a sweet, romantic kid who adores his bff-turned-wife, and the whole season (I mean, can we talk about the all the mirrors?) is about cutting through the bullshit we do to try to mask who we really are.
The thing about Luke Newton that I really appreciate is that he really understands who his character is and keeps that front and center. Colin is trying to be something he's not, and the real Colin slips out unintendedly, and that kind of subtly is hard to play.
The absolute best moments were when they laughed together - they both really shine when Pen and Colin are allowed to be the sweet friends they've been all along.
Anyway tl:dr - loved their relationship, and my heart will just be broken if we don't get more good development as the seasons continue.
Penelope and Eloise: The fact that this relationship was angled as another romance per se was also delicious. As I said above - Pen and Eloise were probably my favorite dynamic pre-Polin and it was devastating to watch them work their relationship out. But again, it was all so delicious. I loved it and thought it was perfect.
The Featheringtons: I LOVED THEM! They were perfection. I love that they leaned into some really good comedy with the sisters. Not only were they able to show off Nicola's excellent comedic skills, the family as a whole was just a whole delight. I loved the sisters. I loved their husbands. I even liked Portia - and, honestly, I wasn't a huge fan of her in earlier seasons. I loved that they linked Pen and Portia, it really made them seem like mother and daughter.
Colin and his family: There were some fascinating dynamics!
Colin and Eloise: yes, the third part of the platonic love triangle I loved their dynamic during the season. Eloise never really knowing how to handle Colin. The fact that they're close and yet awkwardly so. The fact that they both care so much about Pen in different ways and how LW just hangs over both dynamics. Ooff, so good.
Colin and Anthony & Benedict (and let's throw George in here, too): Love it. Wish there had been more. The brothers are hilarious and wonderful together and just I ate it all up with a spoon. Also, as an aside, I love that George is slowly coming into focus. The kid is adorable.
Colin and Francesca (and let's throw Hyacinth in here, too): Hilariously, Colin and Francesca speak zero times to each other during the whole season. Isn't that weird? Really, their plot lines do not intersect except tangentially for family moments. It's so weird. I feel like I have no sense of this dynamic. As for Hyacinth - I adore her, and I feel like she has more personality than Francesca :P
Colin and Violet: I kind of loved this. She's a mother who understands her kids. And even though Violet wasn't around that much for the A-Plot, I like what role she did have to play in getting Colin to act.
Alright, so the rest of the subplots... It did feel like an abundance of them, but was there really more than previous seasons? Or was it the fact that Pen and Colin usually were subplots, and now that they're the main focus, everything else kind of shifts awkwardly around them?
Anthony and Kate: I love them to pieces, and wish there had been more of them. Their dynamic remains sexy and smart. Kate remains one of the best characters on the show, and is such an intelligent woman. I'm so glad she had wonderful, insightful conversations with her new family. I really would have loved to have had a Kate and Penelope scene. Also, the India thing was awkward - I lol'd because it clearly was written as an 'out' for the couple. But it's ultimately fine. But yes - bring back Kanthony in future seasons. I really don't care how much Jonathan Bailey is doing other things.
Cressida Cowper: I thought she was a fantastic villain, and the fact that she was so wrapped up with Eloise was kind of delicious. I don't think they needed to linger on her private life as much as they did. But I was fascinated that there seemed to be some queer coding in there, and wondered, for a bit if she was going to be a lesbian. I also think her ending was a little weak and she just kind of scampered off without any reprieve. I do wonder if she'll be back, tbh.
Francesca: Oof. It was intriguing on first watch but I find it incredibly dragging on subsequent watches and have a tendency to skip over it. I think this is the one plot line that really could have been cut down. I understand that it's set up but it was kind of meh for me. However, I am totally fine with her love interest being changed to a woman. Let's do this bisexuals! Speaking of which...
Benedict: My god, it felt like the show doesn't know what to do with him - and I am hoping Season 4 is his, because they NEED to do something with Benedict. So, to be clear, I LOVE that they made him bisexual. But the woman he was with was so boring, and I just did not care - because I knew it ultimately wasn't going to go anywhere. And, what was with the never ending orgy? Did we really need to cut back to it ten times? Please, show, give Benedict something interesting to do.
The Mondriches: Look, I feel bad saying it, but these people ultimately served no purpose to the show and could have been lifted right out. I'm sure the actors are lovely but if they're not going to directly service the story, then why are we wasting our time? Though, at least they really aren't the ones taking up the most time.
The Queen: They could have played up the rivalry between her and LW a lot more, and they just didn't. It felt... a little anticlimactic. Also, now what do they do with her as a character? Meh.
Violet and Lady Danbury's brother: I just don't care. I get it. I get that Violet should have something to do outside her children. But there are already a million plots, and not everyone needs to have their own individual story. By the time they threaded this in around episode 3 it did feel like too much.
Did I miss anything?
So... that's how I felt on everything. I have seen commentary about the pushback on Season 3. There are some things I agree about and a lot I don't.
About the actors: I disagree, Nicola and Luke are a delight, and they don't deserve the pushback they've been getting.
About the subplots: It is too many, and I do think they should have either made the season longer, or cut a few things.
About Polin not being as steamy: I think Daphne and Simon's soft core porn-a-thon set an expectation that doesn't necessarily work when you're going for other tropes. I did like the steamy scenes we got (though the last one should have been longer -- we better get some happy sex in season 4 or I will be annoyed) but Polin doesn't have the same dynamic as (what is their shipper name??) Daphne/Simon. We were never going to get the porn-a-thon.
Kanthany didn't either in Season 2, I don't know what to tell people. I appreciate that they're servicing the story they're telling and not just relying on sex. But, I will say, it is still the romance genre, based on books that do feature a lot of sex, so I can understand disappointment in some respects. There is a reason people watch these things, and when it's not met, it can be frustrating.
Idk, what else are people bitching about? (that's rhetorical) I think two years is too long a wait for a show like this. And the anthology aspect of it can make it hard when the focus shifts. People adored Anthony and Kate and to shift it to a very different type of love story can feel jarring, especially, I think if you've spent the past two years digesting what we've already had.
And then there are some people who are just never happy.
And I mean, I already feel a little 'meh' about Season 4. (It'll be Benedicts, there are so many hints...) I'll continue to watch, but I am incredibly sad that this was the year my favorites got to shine. My only hope is that Pen and Colin continue to occupy a space in the story... lord help us, though, in that it doesn't take another ten years to finish...
So.... them my thoughts! I'm sure I'll have more of them as I settle into this bright new world.
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Omg, how cute are they????
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