#i just laughed so fucking hard at this
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inkskinned · 24 days ago
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she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.
my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.
my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.
my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.
at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.
my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.
i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.
two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.
it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.
#writeblr#wlw#i often think about like.....#being happy in a gay relationship is sometimes so odd#bc u can forget how stupid ppl are.#bc ur so USED to being gay. and u forget other people GENUINELY ARE homophobic#so it's like. girl pardon?????#but also there are moments where it's like. ohhh the kids are alright#like watching someone razz someone else.... so fucking wholesome#“lemme get this bitche's pronouns before i make gentle fun of them” .... i would have KILLED for that.#THAT is how u know ur accepted#not just tolerated#..... when ppl are like. sure ur nonbinary congrats but WHAT is this fucking sunscreen application#ps idk if "razz'' is a real word but someone asked what it means -#i've always heard it as being a term for 'gentle & friendly teasing'' which like#i personally notice more from my guy friends but is like - when a person isn't#LIKE ACTUALLY teasing u (it's nothing personal/mean) they're just laughing w/you about something#my friends often put on a little voice and call me an anemic little bitch#like 'ooooo the anemic little bitch is cold??? does she need a mouse blanket#bc she's SOOOO SMALL AND ANEMIC???''#and it doesn't hurt my feelings (it makes me laugh very hard) bc 1. i actually called MYSELF that first#and 2. i'm not sensitive about it!!!#a proper razz is when you are ALSO in on the joke - i ALSO think it's funny#for some people i personally find that when they razz u it's when they love u -#they've noticed something genuine about u and love u enough that u know they're not being mean#this is cultural and personality based of course but i'm hispanic#if someone isn't making fun of me it means they hate me . obviously.
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saragrosie · 3 months ago
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Sketching while streaming s5...
Jonathan Sims I will learn to draw you (this is my doing. I could draw him however I want and I choose to stick with an image of him in my brain that is difficult for me to draw. Masochism.)
Not s5 Mahtins below I enjoyed drawing cuz hes neat:
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(Edit: I yassified Martin in the do not separate cuz I wanted his hair fluffier)
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blahaj-blastin · 6 months ago
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Few DnD scenes will ever be funnier for me to imagine than Riz Gukgak fully fucking submerging himself in lava and Kipperlilly revealing herself just out of pure and utter shock
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crows-home · 1 year ago
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more funny things that happened on my first watch of nimona
ID by @peachygos
[ID: A comic juxtaposing screenshots from Nimona 2023 and drawn panels of two people on a couch, one wearing a cap and the other glasses. First is Ballister kneeling in front of the Queen, as she says "Congratulations, Sir Boldheart." Cap says, "OK!! Calling it right now! Queen's gonna die & they're gonna think he did it." Glasses says, "You think?" Cap continues, "Yup! Said in the summary that he's accused of a tragedy. They're gonna find her stabbed w/ his sword by the morning. Maybe during a party or smth." Glasses says, "Hm... Maybe-"
The second image shows just the two on the couch, washed in green light from the screen as the Queen dies. They look at the screen in gaping shock, then at each other.
The next screenshot is of Ballister clutching at his shoulder with a grunt of pain. Both people lean forward in focus. Glasses says, "Wait- did he cut off his whole arm-?" Cap says, "No! Nah, he just knocked the sword out of his hand, I think. Maybe his shoulder got hurt & he's holding his arm back?" Glasses says, "Dude I don't think-"
The final screenshot is a continuation of the previous shot, the camera zooming out to show Ballister clutching his shoulder, and his severed arm laying in the foreground. Both characters silently watch the screen in shock. Glasses gasps and covers their mouth with their hand. /end ID]
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galaxyweighted · 7 months ago
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autism so intense he forgot he was supposed to be slicing and dicing and got distracted by one of his favorite movies
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keydekyie · 1 year ago
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Go you funky little SecUnit! Go!
(One of my favorite scenes from the newest Murderbot novel: System Collapse)
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mamawasatesttube · 4 months ago
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my ideal timkon don't get together until they've both already done some queer realizations and dated other guys a little bit, in part because on tim's end, i think he's been in love with kon since he was 17, but at 17 tim didn't even know he was bisexual, forget anything else. and his feelings for kon were so big but also so constant that he didn't even realize they were there or significant because they've always been there and been huge. for years. so he putters along and does his time in the torment nexus (the closet) and languishes a bit but slowly starts to figure it out.
meanwhile kon dates someone, mostly like omg im dating a guy this is ALLOWED !??!?! and its pretty lowkey and casual and doesnt last bc like . super identity issues, right. kon would Never just tell someone, but secrets and casual relationships dont last long etc etc. but just the entire principle of kon dating someone and then being like yeah idk im not really feeling it like hes nice and all but i think hes more interested in like… yknow, my hot bod, than me. its whatever tho. and tim just being SOOOOO mad that someone would date kon and not absolutely adore him. tim will not be unpacking why hes so mad about kon having a shitty boyfriend. obviously its just bc kons his bestie and deserves better. (😶)
so he's just grouchily tinkering on some upgrade for his car to get the grumpy energies out. like WHATEVER! (angrily turns socket wrench) he's not saying kon should dump the guy or anything (angrily turns socket wrench) but he's just SAYING, kon can do BETTER!!!!! (angrily turns socket wrench) and kon DESERVES better!!! kon deserves someone who will treat him RIGHT!!!!! (angrily turns socket wrench) like if TIM was gonna fuck kon he wouldn't do it like a goddamn quickie and just fucking leave (angrily grabs the next size socket and scoots further under the car) like kon OBVIOUSLY doesn't like that so why won't this guy GET THAT!!!! (angry tinkering noises) if he's that shallow he can go find himself a sexy body pillow to screw!!! leave kon alone!!!!
and cassie sitting on a chair nearby is just like. sorry what was that? "if i was gonna fuck kon"? did you just say--hey tim? hey. can you go back a step?
and tim's just. obviously this is a hypothetical everyone considers about kon. look at him he's . you know. besides, tim's just talking as his best friend who wants the best for him! ugh stop trying to read into it cassie, that's not the POINT--
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samdeancrimespree · 7 months ago
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the difference between sam and dean is that in the phrase “incestuous romantic relationship” sam cringes at incestuous and dean cringes at romantic.
i think he’d be maybe a little weirded out but not that embarrassed if he just. wanted to fuck his brother. like… have you seen his brother? who doesn’t wanna fuck him.
no.. dean’s embarrassed because the thought of his brother not wanting to fuck him makes his heart actually hurt, which he thought was just an overdramatic romcom line. because if he fucked his brother and his brother wanted to keep it casual, it would destroy him.
he doesn’t just want to fuck his brother. he wants to sleep next to him and kiss him and play with his stupid hair and grow old with him and die in his arms.
dean doesn’t wanna fuck his brother. he wants to make love to his brother. and that makes his skin crawl.
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bacchuschucklefuck · 5 months ago
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dreaming abt sophomore year class swap bard!riz
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#fantasy high#fantasy high sophomore year#fhsy#riz gukgak#ft. kalina#fh class quangle#tbh Im not suuuper happy with the bones of these designs yet#but also its just a bit hard to measure up to how strong ''kid who wears suit to school'' is#I kiinda gear the sophomore year design specifically towards like. cameraman-esque aesthetics#kind of dude who's working the light rig And the audio at the same time. dude who's running inbetween two huge tripods#theres also a thing with the freshman year arcade scene that I wanted to draw but just do not have the energy today#maybe in the future! if I can be bothered to draw biz lmao#I wanna draw something for cleric!gorgug first anyway... specifically his death in freshman year#man I'm so glad I tossed bard!riz into investigative journalism that is SO annoying. exactly what I set out to do with my classswaps#can you imagine going to school with that guy. can you imagine going to school with tintin#this also makes kipperlilly vs riz even funnier like influencer vs journalist? it'd be the Worst#man thinking of it I should rework gorgug's design too. currently his sophomore design is really zac core lmao#and zac can pull it off but character design wise its. really nothing. laughs#his junior year design is full aerith at least so that one Im very happy with. what if I tell u cassandra is the deity of#the inbetween spaces in this class swap thingy. and gorgug offers her domain as a stop for folks fresh out of a faith to gather themselves#that being transgender as fuck is kinda coincidental lmao. but well I stand by it I like that#nobody's design has jumped out to me like riz and gorgug yet. adaine I have a prreeetty good idea for#mostly bc shes the hoodie kid this time round lmao. gamer adaine true believers rise up#we take it easy! we take it easy as we go. these comics-lite were real fun to do. I should do that more
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introspectivememories · 1 month ago
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im sorry but i choose to believe that tim drake is the most insufferable "my man, my man, my man" girl about bear. he does not shut up about him. steph is cooking smth in the kitchen? oh my man can do that. bear cooks really well. dick triaging some poor victim on an emergency site? oh my man is really good at that. mhmm, bear is on his way to becoming a paramedic. damian building something? oh my man is really good with power tools. have you ever seen him build ikea? it takes him less than an hour. for our anniversary, he built me a coffee table. mhmm isn't he amazing? yeah my man did that. yeah my man, mhmm that's my ma-
#and on and on and on#like it never fucking stops#jason gets a tattoo? tim manifests in the tattoo parlor to talk about his man's tattoos#'yeah they're sooo gorgeous! he has a grasshopper over his heart cause that's what he calls me! yeah that's like his little nickname for me#'and there's two cardinals in flight on his forearms! isn't that sooo cute!!! he says he's keeping me with him!!!'#and like everyone thought is was cute at first bc like first gay relationship!!! let tim gush about his boyfriend!!!#but then it like quickly and i mean quickly became annoying#like dick puts on his police uniform and tim immediately is like 'have you seen my man in his paramedic uniform? dont his biceps#look so good in it? and he's providing service for those in need without being a pig! isn't my man so great!'#and dick just has to sit there with his eye twitching bc the last time he tried to defend his police job the whole family laughed so hard#they almost cried.#also i hope you know that all of tim's lines are said in a valley girl accent. with the tone of a woman who is so fucking annoying about#her man. like he's the kinda guy at sunday brunch 2 mimosas deep trying to one up bart on like who has the better bf#spoiler alert bart wins only for the sole fact that he's not annoying about kon the way tim is about bear#meanwhile the rest of the group is creating enough of a ruckus that they're like 2 seconds away from getting kicked out of dennys#and while i would like to say that bear knows about this i just think that he has such hearteyes for tim that it completely flies over his#head. like he sees tim and he turns into a fucking idiot. he's putting in the saline line wrong he's doing chest compressions on a guy#who is perfectly fine. he's letting the steak burn on the stove#so theyre like both fucking useless together. and i think that's love.#bernard dowd#tim drake#timbern#timber
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I need everyone to take TEN STEPS BACK and talk about how Agatha Harkness is JOLENE because HELLO?!!?!
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inkskinned · 3 months ago
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actually sometimes being neurodivergent is great bc you have a particular kind of Silly Mode that just . manifests glory. harmless fun is my precious side quest & i have a high score in whimsy. like okay if i gotta be the first dork in the dance pit it's gonna be me and this random toddler and we're gonna avril-style rock ouuuuttt
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levemetal · 2 months ago
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Day 2: Timeloop / Xiao Qi and Jiu Ge
I am cringe and I am not even free
Feel free to reuse this idea but 24 hours are not enough for me to finish an entire comic. I could have taken the simpler prompt but nOOOOOO timeloop is too tempting. Past me why are we like this
#svsss#shen jiu#yue qingyuan#qijiu#qijiuweek2024#the basic idea for this was that both yqy and sj remember each loop#the loop started after their individual deaths in PIDW and resets them to close to disciple era#aka the time Yue Qi was in the caves and SJ presumably got away from the Qiu household or was already with Wu Yanzi#I imagine the first few loops they qi deviated so hard from the shock that they didnt even make it like 1 hour in the loop before beingrese#and then had a few loops just fucking around and finding out#eventually they realise that the other has the memories of all loops and so begins the talks and figuring how tf they can get out of this#maybe they resolve their issues with the promise or not your choice tbh#they try different plans and methods#but they keep dying (read: SJ keeps dying first and YQY either dies or sewerslides not soon after) and getting reset with no end in sight#until the last pages where the svsss timeline begins#SJ got replaced with SY and the system isn't letting YQY join him in death or smth nor letting him do anything about SY being there instead#And due to their closeness from being immensily tired from all the loops#YQY notices it immediately but can't do anything about it#the bonus for SY is that this timeline was very kind to LBH & co - 79 figured by now that keeping him in the sect and happy was their best#bet at staying alive - or well at least for longer#I'll continue this storyline in one of the future prompts of this qijiu week#btw the one with the cliff is just the whoopsie daisy timeline where SJ accidentally falls into the Abyss trying to keep LBH from falling i#79 had a bit of a good laugh about that one#cw death#cw violence#cw blood#cw angst
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corpusdiem-seizethedead · 5 months ago
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Charlie: Angel is smiling, did something happen?
Angel: What? I can’t smile just ‘cause I feel like it?
Husk: Valentino tripped and fell in the parking lot.
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om0000 · 5 months ago
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well rendered westley jumpscare
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clingyduoapologist · 1 year ago
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I know everyone goes crazy for “your presence here denies me of both” but honestly we don’t talk about this Malik interaction enough
Like the fucking, “Reflect on that…” is honestly so iconic. Barely a step a removed from just calling him a bitch to his face. Perfect delivery no notes.
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