#i just had to throw this out into the void but where he COULDNT see it

[aggressiveanon]

idbdidgeohsksjsoej HEEELLPPP

yez im alive. am i back online on this account only to panic (/hj)? maybe

but HOLY SHIT

i made some new online friends back in july/august, and ive become really close to one friend in particular

ive already been worried about coming off as too clingy and sharing too much, but it got a LOT worse last night

basically we started a call at 12:30am and stopped calling at 4:30am (so it waz REALLY late) and near the end i just. dont know what happened

he just laughed so warmly and genuinely that it made me smile so hard like. he has the most majestic laugh known to man istfg. i mean even his voice is just so pretty. i mean itz so pretty that i literally FELL ASLEEP talking to him last night (what the FUCK)

idk if thats weird or something (it probably iz) but HOLY SHIT

hez literally awesome and amazing and so funny and hiz voice is so pretty what iz WRONG with me ishdsmsohsoshskso

[tetsuooooooooooo]

ok im watching act 3 again to write down my questions and see if anything makes sense this time

edit im 2 eps in this got long as FUCK kjchgxhi come talk to me!!!!! im screeching into the void!!!!!!! americans wake up look at my post!!!!!!!! say everything to me!!!!!!!!!

why are we introducing time travel alternate universes into this story

where did the other ekko go, was he in Our ekkos universe/body or just out of commission, bc that makes no sense i think, if they didnt switch then wheres the ✨symmetry✨

do you think that skye had anything to do with them figuring out the cleaning flowers thing in the AU? and is viktor dead? and jayce in jail? banished? i wonder where skye went here i hope shes living her best not in love with a gay guy life

where the FUCK was the Original-AU heimerdonger when he got bodysnatched by the Our version? they do still call him professor but in Our version he just recently got kicked out of the council so would he still be just freeloadin around zaun at that point in the AU? was he ever councilor?

can everyone on my screen Please stop hurling their guts out from timetraveldisease

if theres no hextech and no anomaly in the AU reality then how did it throw them in it in the first place

ekko is smart but if he was smarter hed stay around to research what needed to happen to make zaun work in this version and save himself time figuring it out from the groundup back home, i think

but also what the fuck COULD have possibly happened to make it so different CUZ LIKE- ok the little flashback bit with vi dying in jayces house- the gang is wearing the same clothes as in Our version, so that would probably indicate that THAT zaun was also in the same state as Our ""original"" version too? right? no? i mean i would say they did put emphasis on clag n mylos clothes being different and more piltovian or whatever idk maybe im onto nothing WAIT NO BECAUSE CLAGGOR WAS MAKING THE DAMN FLOWER TO CLEAN THE POLLUTION SO IF THATS STILL THERE THEN IT COULDNT HAVE BEEN RESOLVED THAT MUCH EARLIER HERE RIGHT

also what the fuck had to be different exactly for enforcers to bust the kids after blowing up a building and not chuck them all in stillwater this time around? did they really care that much about vi dying? was that really the inciting incident for zauns inclusion? marcus? fucking MARCUS marcus? marcus "im gonna bury the lot of you" "deals with the devil to get a 14 yearold put in jail for life"* marcus sees a zaunite girl dead (after breaking into a piltover home and wrecking it) and just goes "aw :c" ? the council of rich businessfucks like salo whod do everything they can to maintain the status quo? is One Dead Kid (still the name of my nonexistent band) really all it takes this time? am i too tough on these people am i dumb if id like some elaboration on how that whole story went or

*to be honest i. dont really get what that Deal thing with silco was about in the first place

wheres Scar aaaat show me my guyy whERES VIKAAA

how did the shimmer story end up in the AU because IF the main change here is vis death then i could believe that silco WAS still already on track with beginning the production at that point if of course singed is also in the same position as Originally

is there a universe where that hammer lands on jayjays head and ends him right there

did silco forgive vanvan before or after zaun gets their "win" in the AU? because my bet is DEFINITELY after

ALSO how the fuck in a city like piltover did they not renovate jayces blown up flat after fuck knows how many years, at LEAST 3 (id wager at least 7 but thats just me so whatever) like city of progress who?? is it just there as like a cautionary tale??? did they put up a lil plaque for jayce after he kild himself?? they just boarded that shit up tho there was nobody there?? why did they leave it like that idk

WHY did heimerdeimer die???? DID he die?? why did he DIE?????? what happens to the AU-Original hongerdonger??? you couldnt have just waited 10 minutes and have powder do allat?? she trusted us right? maybe not

why WAS bonking viktor in the head with the zdrive the answer to our problems

powder knew what she was doing with that innovators cum petition sign right

WHAT the FUCK was that mylo claggor moment like am i inSANE OR WAS THIS SUS AS HELL also (man rapping) put some FUCKING RESPECT on stromaes name

how DID rizzard viktor stop being purple actually. god i still hate that reveal im not smart but i refuse to believe that was good writing

what happened to put that rock in jayces wrist? it wasnt a process it was viktor doing it in a split second why did that need to happen? so he wouldnt lose it? hunh?

no because WHAT IS AMBESSAS FUCKING GOAL HERE IN THE END

does she want kino back? whAT DO YOU WANT WOMANNNN

did that princess girl that got her head sliced off by bessa in the first season actually have anything to do with anything in the end or not cuz im just confuzzled

how does he know that

what does that mean

how does SHE know THAT

what does THAT mean

does loris have the same accent as vik??????

where the fuck did that ginger binch come from in the first place is she from piltover or noxus if shes from piltover what did ambessa give her and when

Neither of them would say ANY of this shit

wonder what vi would say if she saw this conversation before her and cait decided to pork

im just gonna choose to believe she was in there for like 5 hours so her labrador attention span just reset and she chilled out about jinx (actually ykw i guess im willing to believe at this point she doesnt really care that much if jinky offs herself or not)

what the FUCK ARE these goddamn doll puppet thingies viktor makes why are they LIKE that why is THIS the theme here (because orianna and Plot) (but like dyouknow what i mean)

what the fuck was the point of Skye Young as a character in this entire story other than a Gaydar Jammer. with all respect to skyvik stans but like. what is it.

lmao you abandoned them much before that guys

we stan a I Gave You Food And A Roof Why Are You Sad You Ungrateful Ingrate queen

it REALLY DOESNT DOES IT JGHCCGHIBC

why DID skye die again? they wouldnt have just? integrated? again? or smthn? why is this a one-passenger ride all of a sudden? we already got a hivemind thing goin? whatsup?

[stellawolfearts]

I can imagine there's an instance where Macaque wakes up from a nightmare or whatever and when he wakes up he finds that the kids are sleeping but he can't find Wukong and he panics internally until he finds Wukong in the kitchen making tea and just clings

Cold

So......cold.

and dark.

He was alone, cold and trapped within the dark. How long had he been here...?

Ah thats right, for all eternity.

Theres no escaping the cold and dark grasp of death, no escaping her piercing blue eyes. Her cold dead hands dragging you into the abyss. All you can do is forget any shred of hope and let the darkness drag you into deaths grasp.

For that, is destiny

The air that filled his lungs with a sharp gasp was like a drop of water in a barren desert. But he had been too greedy and now choked on his breaths.

"Destiny"

Macaque sat up and scrambled back against the headboard.

Everything was still dark, the void-was he still in there? was he dead?!

no no he had been revived, he was revived and now lived in the mortal realm. why else would his body be reaction to such a nightmarish scene in such way.

sweat clung to his fur, his breathing sharp and quick, burning his chest. his shaky hands tightened around something soft, a blanket.

He was in a bed.

as his eyes adjusted to the dark he could see the bedroom.

Wukongs bedroom.

"W...Wu-" Macaque looked around he bed "Wukong?!"

His hands seached the bed frantically, tearing off the blankets as he searched for the one he had been sleeping with. but in place of him was an empty spot on the matress.

"Destiny"

"Wukong!" Macaque jumped off of the bed but his legs emmediatly gave out beneath him and he crashed to he ground with a thud, hitting his head against the hardwood flooring.

the room began to spin "w-wukong" Macaque groand trying to push himself up. He managed to get to his feet by leaning on the wall but he felt like he was going to collapse any moment.

"Macaque!"

Macaque heard her voice, he wanted to call out for her again, reach out and grab her, throw her on the bed and make sure she never leaves his side again.

But all he managed to do was raise his teary face to Wukong, who was now standing by the doorway shocked to see Macaque in such a state.

"Macaque, what happened?" He rushed over and gently grabbed his arms to guide Macaque back to the bed but instead Macaque pulled out of Wukongs hold and wrapped his arms around Wukong, digging his face into his chest.

Wukong was frozen, Macaque was crying into his chest with his arms wrapped around him so desparatly as if he would dissapear if Macaque let go.

Another nightmare.

Wukong snapped out of his daze and wrapper her arms around Macaque.

"shh plums its okay, im here. Im sorry, i couldnt sleep so i went to go make some tea. Im sorry i wasnt there"

Macaque didnt reply, he just kept silently crying into Wukongs chest while holding her tightly.

with a sigh Wukong swiftly picked up her crying lover, luckily she had already turned off the oven before she got to thier bedroom, and set macaque down into the bed. Macaque wasnt letting go so Wukong crawled into the bed with thier plums.

Macaque still wouldn't let go, and Wukong wasnt going to make him. Wukong wiped away macaques tears and kissed his forehead. then pulled the blankets over the both of them and curled around Macaque to hep him feel as safe as possible.

"its okay plums....im here. your safe"

---------------------------------------

alternativly

------------------------------------

Wukong couldn't sleep, again....it wasn't a rare occurrence. Then again ever since he and macaque had made amends his sleep schedule had been much healthier then normal. But wukogn guesses that old habits die hard and now he was in the kitchen pouring a nice hot glass of tea to hopefully calm himself enough to rest tonight.

"Wukong?"

Wukong stopped mid-sip, she set the glass down and turned to Macaque who looked very distraught. Sweat soaking his fur, his face red and puffy, Obviously from crying, and his tail wrapped tightly around his leg.

"plums, whats wrong?" she asked. adjusting herself in her seat to face Macaque.

Macaque only hummed as he walked towards Wukong and stood behind them.

"Nightmare?" Wukong asked as Macaque wrapped his arms around thier torso and rested his head on thier shoulder.

Wukong raised his hand and cupped macaques cheek, bringing it closer to her to she could gently kiss his lips.

"its okay, your safe with me"

Macaque grumbled something and buried his face further into Wukongs shoulder as he held him tighter.

[mumscarian]

i promised yall that id tell you about my superhero au, so here it is! thanks to all the anons who reminded me abt it, i 100% would not have remembered otherwise. Anyways, take this, and hopefully ill even write it one day lol.

Scar's the hero, Grian's the vigilante, Mumbo's the villain

they are all HORRIBLE at their jobs

You know that one vine by ProZD about the villain who kept accidentally doing good things? that's mumbo. real doofenshmirtz-esque guy.

scar is so clumsy that he practically does mumbo's job for him. he tries to save a cat in a tree and ends up burning the tree down somehow

grian technically can't be bad at his job, seeing as he is a chaotic neutral in his situation. he's charismatic and often gets the better of scar and mumbo, but is very oblivious when it comes to citizen stuff.

there are a few rules to the meta of this au, which are laws of the universe-- unless its really funny or angsty, and in that case: laws were meant to be broken

1. whatever mumbo and scar do, either it is cancelled out by themselves, the other, or grian puts a stop to it. (example situation: the tree scar accidentally sets on fire (mentioned above) is extinguished by mumbo's evil freeze ray, which he was using to try to kill scar. grian was the one who put the cat in the tree in the first place.) 2. Grian, in roadrunner fashion, always gets the upperhand in the end, though there are times when it seems like either the law or mumbo have truly caught him, just for the ✨drama✨ 3. Grian can make anything work, as long as its sticking to the bit. a true looney tunes man. he has the power of the Absurd on his side.

Grian's superpower is his wings, which he can summon at will

Mumbo's is shapeshifting. i dont exactly know what kind of shapeshifting yet, but i did have a cool idea that if he didn't carefully maintain his form, bits of him start flaking away until he's just Void with a mustache tacked on (the mustache never leaves LOL but he does wear a mask as a villain)

Scar desperately hides his superpower, and just uses his outstanding charisma to avoid the question. (he can turn into a cat <3)

As citizens, they are all Very Normal and Not Suspicious At All! Except for grian. lord help that man, he wouldn't know secrecy if it shat on his shoes. It should be an open secret by now, but through a series of comical yet confusing events, his identity is still a secret to the public. for now.

Speaking of Grian, he works at a coffee shop, because I'm in love with cliches. Mumbo is an redstone engineer, and scar is a landscaper. Grian wants to be an architect, but he had to drop out of college for a couple of years. He's taking it online this year tho!

they all know each other, but mumbo's the only one suspicious of anyone's identities

grian and scar, disguised in their hero gear, routinely flirt with each other's and mumbo's civilian identities. mumbo can't because a villain cant exactly flirt with civilians without them throwing a brick at them LOL

the flirting has No Effect on mumbo (besides him being suspicious ig) until he figures out their real identities and the realization that oh my god grian and scar are flirting with me kicks in and he gets incredibly flustered.

i mentioned before that the whole "villain goes to hero's house all broken and battered saying 'i didn't know where else to go'" and that definitely happens. at one point. i dont know where or when but it definitely happens once the story reaches a more serious and less cartoony point. ill make it happen. i dont have much of an actual plot in mind, if you couldnt tell. haha.

thats all i have baiii

[literaila]

a void on your side of the bed. 

loki x gn!reader 

summary: loki is feeling lonely. and guilty about that. 

here was the thing:

loki tried not to ask for too much. he tried to be the perfect partner, the perfect person just for you.

he didnt complain when you wanted to sleep in, or when he was supposed to make you breakfast (he enjoyed doing that). he wasnt upset when you asked him to ‘clean up’ around the house, or when you refused to buy him any more ice cream.

he tried to eliminate any problems-- never been done before by the god of mischief --he might cause before they even appeared, and tried to give you anything and everything you might want.

it wasnt a hard task, actually. he liked the feeling in his chest when you smiled at him, when you were grateful for his help or when he surprised you with something that made your life just a little bit better. he liked taking care of you, causing less trouble than before.

but. it was really hard not to complain when you werent paying attention to him.

when you needed space for just a bit too long for his liking. when he felt like an interruption every time he attempted to make any small talk with you, and you sighed-- almost reluctantly --before turning to him.

he knew you were busy, and he knew that you wanted to get as much work done as you could during the day. he just didnt like it.

he didnt like not conversing with you during the day, not cuddling with you on the couch during lunch while you snacked on something beside him. he didnt like leaving you alone until it was nine o’clock at night and you looked like you were contemplating murder.

he felt lonely. and he just missed you.

and, gods, he was really trying not to complain.

he was really trying not to make this a bigger struggle for you by stealing any of your time. he knew how hard you were working, knew that it drained all the life out of you by the end of the day, knew that the last thing you needed was him telling you that he was upset.

he was used to not sharing his emotions, to building up walls and keeping all his thoughts locked in. but usually, he didnt have to do that with you.

it was all looking up for loki when the week was coming to a slow end. friday night, he felt excited to get you back for at least two days, to steal all the time he could from you before you got annoyed of him. he got his usual smirk back when you came out of your office friday night, giving him a soft smile as you headed to the bedroom.

this was it, he knew. tomorrow morning, he wasnt going to let you leave bed until at least noon.

he fell asleep that night, arms tucked around you, lips smiling against your head, with thoughts of the next day filling his dreams.

so, when he woke up in the morning, colder than usual, a void where you were laying in his arms, it wasnt surprising that he was feeling more upset than before.

disappointment was a violent emotion.

still, he walked out of the room with some hope left, that maybe you were just drinking coffee and eating breakfast while you waited for him.

that hope disappeared when he heard the familiar click-clacking from the room you had proclaimed was your office.

you were working. again. and loki was alone. again.

he felt a groan building up in his chest, a terrible feeling filling him as he listened for your breathing. he knew it was madness to miss you this much when you were only a door away, but he wasnt used to spending days away from you.

he reminded himself that you were right there with a bitter laugh.

he was trying not to be angry or disappointed with you, he knew that it wasnt fair to put you at the end of the blame when you didnt even know how he was feeling and that it wasnt fair for him to want you to stay with him of every second of every day. to ask for so much.

he turned toward the bedroom again and tried to drown his emotions in reading.

it wasnt really working, but at least when he was this far away from you he didnt feel like you were ignoring him.

at around noon, after hours of re-reading the same chapter over and over again and illusioning himself as his brother and throwing a fake hammer around, he finally decided that you needed lunch, at least. he decided that bringing lunch was a perfectly acceptable thing for a significant other to do.

(and hopefully, it wouldnt annoy you too much)

“my love,” he called, knocking on the door. “i’ve brought you sustenance”

you replied a quick ‘come in!’ and loki put a smile on his face, walking in the room deviously and grinning down at you in your chair.

“thank you, loki,” you whispered, kissing his cheek when he leaned to place the plate on your desk, rubbing a hand down his arm when you looked back at the screen in front of you.

loki tried not to preen too much at the touch.

“how are you, love?” he asked, bending down to stare at the screen with you. he didnt understand anything about it, but it was still fun to pretend. to include himself with you.

“oh, tired,” was all you said as you leaned over to type something yet again. loki frowned at your words and focused his attention on your face instead.

you looked perfectly normal, perfect and normal, he supposed. your eyes were bright and your face was blank, but still, loki was worried over your words.

“maybe you could take a break for lunch then?” he asked, bringing a hand to your face and tracing your jawline with his thumb. he was trying to sound casual, to not let the hope that you might concede slip.

“i wish i could,” you sighed and looked over at him with a smile, taking the hand that was on your face and placing a gentle kiss on his palm. he froze under the attention. “thank you, sunshine, for lunch. i adore you,” you kissed him again, and turned away.

his hand was still in the air, left behind.

your words were sweet. exactly what loki wanted to hear, really, but he heard the unspoken dismissal of his presence. he knew this was your way of asking him to leave, even if you didnt realize it.

he wanted to plead with you to let him stay.

he stood up instead, not letting the sigh escape his lips in the room with you, and headed toward the door. he touched the doorknob, feeling all the emotions building up in his chest. making their way through his body like a stampede.

it was all very much for him. this disappointment that he could barely hide anymore. the loneliness he knew he had to return to in the other room.

before he realized it, the words were slipping from his lips.

“have i done something wrong?” his usual teasing tone was there, his usual indicator for dramatics, but when you looked at him the look on his face was much more serious than his tone.

you frowned immediately, and loki scolded himself. “quite the opposite really, sweets. you just brought me lunch?”

“right, of course.” he nodded to go, but you stopped him.

“is there something wrong, loki?” you were turned towards him completely, concern tainting both your face and your tone. loki felt terrible like he shouldn’t have said anything at all.

he tried to put on a smile. “no, darling.”

but you werent easy to trick, he knew, and you scowled at him. “loki.” you were staring at him with your intimidating eyes now, only slightly soft because you were worried. even to a god, it was scary.

reluctantly, he nodded. avoiding your eyes now.

“come sit, sunshine,” you said, gesturing to the couch next to your desk. loki could hear the concern more now, stronger. he winced and took a seat.

after a few moments of silence and loki looking at the wall with furrowed eyebrows, you spoke first. “whats wrong?”

he sighed, feeling silly. you were supposed to be working and he was interrupting that with childish emotions that he could deal with himself. but still, he couldnt help but feel grateful at your asking.

“we havent been spending as much time together recently and..” he stopped, still avoiding his eyes to run a hand through his hair. “i suppose i’m feeling a bit..excluded? or maybe lonely?” he winced, sighed, looked like the perfect definition of regret. “i dont know” he said, almost silent.

but while loki was feeling ridiculous, you were looking upon him with something similar to horror in your eyes. terror at the thought of hurting him.

you were well aware that you’d been working more, the exhaustion every night made sure of it, but you hadnt realized that it was taking a toll on loki too, that he was... missing you while you were preoccupied.

you hadnt even considered it, really, when you longed to go watch a movie with him or have dinner together. your clinginess wasnt surprising, but loki?

he never seemed to mind space.

your brain took a few seconds to process it before you could speak again. “i’m so sorry, loki.” you were already pleading with him, begging for forgiveness.

how could you have disregarded him so much this week? you felt disgusted at the thought.

loki’s head snapped up in shock. he thought you might be tired with his admission, maybe even upset. not... regretful? he didnt expect to see this look on your face, one that was so disappointed, so loving.

“i didnt realize that you might be feeling lonely also, which is completely unthoughtful of me, i just thought that maybe-” you were gesturing with your hands, looking around the room rapidly as you used all your breath.

“you arent upset?” loki asked carefully, interrupting your rambling.

you paused, then blinked, looking at him curiously. he was serious, that much you could tell. he had that same frown on his face. you blinked again.

“upset?” you repeated, astounded. “why would i be upset?”

loki was just as confused as you now. he scratched his neck, looking down. “because i’m getting in the way of your work, interrupting you, being troublesome?” he said it as if he was trying to ring any bells in your head. he seemed sure of every word he spoke.

all you felt was more horror.

“your emotions are not interruptions or ‘troublesome’“ you mocked his accent, mostly with anger at yourself as you scowled at the floor. your words were harsh, but loki didnt flinch away. he still didnt understand.

“they aren’t?”

your eyes snapped up to his, guilt pouring from them. immediately, you jumped up from your chair, coming to sit next to him and taking his hand in yours. his face relaxed a bit at the feel of your touch. “of course they’re not, loki. if you’re upset i want to know. you and your feelings arent burdens on my day, i love you!” you promised him with strong eyes, with a strong grip on his hand.

it was probably the most important thing in the world to you that he knew this. that he didnt feel unwanted again.

“i love you too” he answered, quickly, before he even had the chance to think over your words.

he almost smiled when he did, proud of himself, of you, for seemingly no reason. you loved him.

it was nice to hear.

it was also nice to hear the softness in your voice, the sweet words, his name. it was nice to be sitting next to you.

he was hit was a sudden burst of longing, this time for something different.

he wished he would’ve talked to you days before, wished there was more he could do. if that had happened, he might’ve saved you both from some unwanted feelings. might’ve kept you from the sorrow that you still had on your face.

you were still upset, he knew.

“i’m sorry i’ve been so busy. that i havent spent enough time with you,” the words fell from your lips before you could stop them, despite the happy look on loki’s face. you still felt horrible, guilty for making loki feel anything but joy.

“its okay, darling, i know you have a lot of work to do.”

though his words were sweet, they only made you scoff.

“thats not an excuse.” you insisted, scowling again. “i havent been taking care of you,”

loki, who no longer felt disappointed or lonely, who was enjoying just the sound of your voice and feel of your skin, frowned with you. he didnt like the pain in your voice, the anger he could hear.

he really wasnt upset anymore, never upset with you, to begin with. he was only glad that you knew he’d missed you and that you seemed to feel the same. he was happy to see you away from your desk.

his brows furrowed.

then he smiled again, leaning in closer to you with an idea.

he lifted your face towards him with gentle fingers, admiring you before he spoke. “i know how i’d like you to make it up to me,” he said, smirking at you.

it was a familiar look. one you hadnt seen in far too many days.

“you do?” you asked him, forgetting your guilt for a moment while he stared at you.

he nodded, staring down at your lips. his damned smirk was glued to his face now, distracting you from anything besides him. “i rather think you’ll enjoy it..” he assured.

and then he kissed you, and guilt was the last thing on your mind.

the thing was: loki was already the perfect person for you.

*

[crimsonophelia]

Can I request for a fluffy friends to lovers fic with Venti and a human gn reader? They’re good friends (but the reader doesn’t know his real identity) and when reader brings up their desire to see a wind wisp in real life Venti decides to surprise them by transforming into his true form and paying them a visit. The reader finds this mysterious little wind wisp at their doorstep and gets excited, takes care of it, and while feeding it apple slices starts talking about how their good friend Venti would love to see them - but oh, he’s less of a friend and more of a crush who I’ve loved for a long time… wait, where did the wisp go? Wait, Venti?! When did you get here?!

featuring: venti x gn!reader

warnings: none

published: june 30, 2021

form: imagine

a/n: thank you for sending this in—i need more venti requests, he’s my baby <3

you could tell that the drink was beginning to hit you hard when you felt your muscles go slack. it was your fourth pint of the night, and although you thought that you could hold your drink fairly well, you could never hold a candle to your bard friend’s seemingly bottomless appetite for wine. venti was on his seventh--or was it eighth?--mug of cider for the night, and was still fairly unfazed, if you consider his usual bumbling amiability to be his default. after a long day of working and whatever it was that venti did in the daytime, you two had decided to meet up at the angel’s share that evening for a drinking night between friends, and to catch up on life and whatever else goes on in the city of mondstadt. 

the night had begun with a mug per person, as you and venti caught up with each other. due to your duties at home, and his rather inconstant job as a traveling musician, it was oftentimes difficult for you and the bard to stay in touch--responsibilities always seemed to get in the way. so, naturally, you took advantage of every opportunity you could get to see venti, one-on-one, and simply talk. after knowing him for quite a while, he really was a delight to talk to, always full of witty riddles and forever knowing the right thing to say at the right time. venti really was quite remarkable. 

he also had the unique talent of contagious alcoholism; after having spent an hour or so drinking and chatting with him, you unwittingly started drinking more than your usual limit, absolutely carried away with whatever small conversation venti had you engaged with at the moment. the conversation had somehow strayed into the topic of myths and legends of mondstadt. venti was speaking of some strange conspiracies surrounding the origin of the anemo hypostasis up in the mountains, and as the alcohol began to break down your proper judgement, you began to go on and on about how you, as a child, dreamed of seeing an elusive wind wisp. 

you had heard stories about the boy revolutionary, armed with his bow and his words, accompanied by a little white wind wisp, leading mondstadt’s journey to freedom. the story had enchanted you when you were young, and clearly you still had not given up hope of meeting a similar wind wisp. perhaps it would bring you the same joy and power to change your life for the better, just like it did for the hero of old mondstadt. 

venti listened to your reminiscing closely, looking at you with a quizzical look of interest. your intoxicated state made it so that you didn’t notice the look on his face as if he was plotting something, but, to be fair, venti’s poker face was notable for its impregnability. the night ended with him having to walk you home, propping your arm over his shoulders so that you wouldn’t trip and fall on the cobblestone streets. the last thing you remembered was him tucking you into bed, and singing you one of his funny little songs.

the next morning, you woke with a pounding headache and the bright noon sun peeking through your shutters. archons, was it so late already? you pulled yourself out of bed, trying not to stumble, distracted by the pounding in your head. you had a long list of things to do today that you had to complete, and you severely regretted drinking so much and so late with that damned bard last night (though you could never really hate him--he was too adorable).

slipping on whatever clothing closest to your bed and sluggishly following through with your daily morning routine, you got ready to head out the door to water the carrots and potatoes in your backyard. as you pulled open the door, prepared to step out and face the piercing daylight, you caught yourself as you almost stepped on the little figure at your doorstep. lying there on its side, was a wind wisp. yes, just like the ones you had read about all your childhood and you had mused about endlessly last night. it had its little eyes shut, sleeping probably, its delicate little form curled up on the step. 

you were bewildered, partially at the coincidence of it all, but mostly by the rarity of what had occurred before your eyes. a wind wisp, something most people never even saw once in their lifetimes, suddenly showing up right at your doorstep after you had talked about your desire to meet one just the night before. crouching down, you scooped up its little body in your hands. the little thing began to wake, hands rubbing its eyes sleepily, as it made a chirping noise. it was ridiculously adorable. 

“hey there, little guy”, you cooed. “what are you doing here?”

as it began to regain consciousness, the wisp floated up off your hands, small gusts of air emitting from its form, and it flew up to nuzzle against your face. it felt like a warm breeze brushing against your cheek, and you heard it chirping in your ear. 

you giggled. “well aren’t you the cutest little thing!” you raised your hand to pet it, and it made a little gurgling noise, leaning into your touch. something about its mannerisms felt so familiar, almost like something you had known in a past life perhaps, but you couldn’t put a finger on it. its presence was just endlessly comforting, even though you had only known it for a few minutes. 

reaching into your pantry, you pulled out some apples you had picked the day before, and cut it into small slices. the wisp watched you eagerly as you went about your business, like it could understand everything you did. holding up a thin slice to the wisp, a little hole in its void of a face opened up and enveloped the slice whole. a little shocked but certainly entertained, you gave it an approving head pat. 

as the day went on, the little wisp continued to follow you throughout mondstadt as you ran your errands. you went outside, behind your house, to take care of the crops you were growing. as you watered your plants, the little wisp helped you disperse the water more efficiently, blowing a gentle wind from your watering can so that you didn’t have to walk as far to water the faraway plants. you go to pick some apples and sunsettias nearby, and the little fellow would fly up to the hard-to-reach fruits and throw himself against them to knock them loose from the branches, right where you could catch them. you worried a little bit whether he was hurting himself by doing so, but he appeared to be pleased just to assist you, and he certainly was not ashamed to take a few bites from the fruits of your shared labor at the end of the day. 

considering how efficiently your errands were completed today, of course all thanks to the helper you acquired that morning, you thought it would be nice to use the time you had in the late afternoon to take the wisp out for a picnic dinner at windrise to show your appreciation. gathering some of the fruit the both of you had collected, and some sandwiches you made, you placed it all in a little wicker basket and set off for the great tree with your companion upon your shoulder. 

upon arriving, you laid down a gingham blanket in the shade of the great tree of windrise, just a moments away from the ancient statue of barbatos. you felt like a child again, remembering the summers of carefree exploration, tunneling through the thickets in the forest, or catching frogs by the creek, or tumbling down the hills by the sea. and now, a wisp joined you, taking you back to the memories of those years, when life was much simpler.

you couldn’t help but to think of venti, the bard, the friend, who had brought you such comfort through difficult times, whose music, like the warm touch of the wisp, reminded you of home and the beauty that life could bring. your companion was now feasting comedically fast on the food you had brought along, swallowing up fruits whole, and chewing for several moments before helping itself to another. you chuckled and gave it a pat. “greedy little fellow, aren’t you?” you couldnt help but to think venti would have loved to meet the wind wisp, considering his love for nature and all sorts of fauna, and considering the small resemblance between himself and the creature.

“stick around for a bit and i might introduce you to my friend, the bard”, you told it, not really caring that it probably couldn’t understand you. “im actually not sure that we are friends, to be honest. these days we rarely see each other but...” you trailed off, distracted by the sound of the breeze through the branches. the wisp stopped eating and watched you intently. “well”, you began. “i sometimes find myself wishing him and i were more than friends. maybe not lovers, not right away but... i just know that dearly. i cannot be sure that he feels the same, but that is of no matter.” you pat the wisp’s little head again. “if i can make him happy, even just as friends, that is enough for me.”

out of nowhere, a strong wind blew past you, knocking over your wicker basket and sending it flying several feet away. agitated, you scrambled up to chase after it, finally grasping it before it could fly too far. you were perplexed—where in the world could such a strong wind have come from? the sky was clear, and there were no clouds obstructing the setting sun. how odd, you thought to yourself.

you turned around to bring the basket back to your sitting spot, but to your surprise, the wisp was gone. no, in its place was now your bard friend, venti, sitting there on the blanket like he had been there all along. how in the world did he get here without you noticing, and where in the world did the wisp go off to? you hurried over to venti, questioning, “since when did you get here?”

the bard smirked, and fiddled with his lyre that you just noticed he had brought along with him. he had that look on his face again, the one he wore whenever he had some sort of plot in mind.  “whatever do you mean, [y/n]?”, he replied amusedly. “i’ve been here all along.”

[hufflautia]

AA I WANNA KINDA THROW UP. i just went through all my notifications for the last few months in which i was gone and void and just gone like my dad. one thing that i realized that was kind of a shocker was that i like to abandon things before they can abandon me, or just do dumb shit and disappear before i get disappointed.

a beautiful example was when i had ordered two cute dresses and they finally came in the mail and as i was trying one on, i ddint rlly bother looking around it for a zipper besides the back of it, i rlly just shoved that shit over my legs and tried to pull it up and when that didnt work i pulled it over my head and somehow got it on and when i tried to take it off, for the life of me i couldnt and thats when i noticed a zipper in the side.

:/

i know, i have worms for brains. and after i realized, one: im dumb, but also two: theres a likelihood tht i decided not to look for the zipper bc i automatically assumed after i saw no zipper on the back that there wasnt one instead of searching for one bc if i couldnt find one, then i would get worried and disappointed. so i just went straight into it and tried to wear it without using one.

as i was looking through all the notifications, i just felt so immensely sad. maybe bcim listening to intense piano music bc the thought of going through all the notifications made me rlly anxious. bc then i would have to see all the likes and reblogs and comments and be reminded that there are actually people who care and like my work and im an old fart who disappeared for months. and i feel ultra bad bc of that ask i got of the person who was like pls i need closure areu working on the series or not : ( the email connected to this blog is one i no longer use so i didnt get the notification that i got an ask and UGH. the ask was back in december and now its jan and i feel so bad.

yall know how much i struggled with my writing and all the likes and reblog and just the lack of feedback i receive and how i was disappointed. so i think i have reached the reasoning behind my disappearance: disappear bc they disappoint you again. just like my dad when he would consistently disappoint me and i wsant in control of the situation, i could not make him come back home but im in control ofmy own actions so i leave before i can get disappointed again, try to fit on the dress without the disappointment that there was no zipper.

but as i was going through all the notifications i realzied that i am actually loved to some extent. sure, some of my fics dont do so well in my eyes, but others do. i remember feeling sad when chapter 5 part 1 didnt get much feedback but here i am, four months after it posted, and theres 102 notes and thats good enough for me.

i feel so sad, like alone here. my stupid fucking ocd forced me to go throuhg my entire feed every single day on tumblr and it was so exhausting. but i thankfully came out of that by not doing it, and it felt okay again. i was ok. but then i kinda lost touch with tumblr after? like i miss the people i used to see on my feed and i wonder where they are. i wonder where you all are. theres probably gonna be like two or three people reading this, and imt hankful. i hope ur ok.

i feel so weird on this blog. theres so much shit that happened, like with the ocd and then the stalker friend and then the whole thing with feedback. i have a very mixed feeling. sometimes i tell myself im never going back bc the validation will never be enough. but other times i want to write, not even for the feedback but because i like my writing, i like crafting it and thinking of ways to perfect it and make it nice.

i remember the days when i did incorrect quotes and i remember stopping them bc my anxiety was getting to be too much, and thats when i kinda disconnected with tumblr bc then my follower and like count slowed. i think i wanna start it again bc it was fun but its like, where are the people i used to see? people who i follow either stopped posting or idk where they are. i feel sad, like everyone is leaaving tumblr and im reminiscing on what this used to be. this used to be my whoel life and thats HELLA dramatic, no it wasnt, but i remember how excited i felt whenever i logged on tumblr, all the asks i got, etc. its sad when u lose touch with something u would've given everything for. but im not forgetting the new people who i come across, who are still here. its sad and beautiful. maybe things will get better when i post incorrect quotes again and connect with more people. bc this is connecting, in a way. like hey this post is funny. it reminds me that people are there and im not in a void.

thank u if u got this far, thank u for not leaving me in the void of loneliness. :(.

i think that before, when i was semi-notreally-active last year, i was kinda sad. like still dealing with a lot of stuff. ugh work, i remember when i had work in the summer and i was SO fucking exhausted all the time and didnt have the energy to write or just do literally anything. that shit was horrible. but now im actually happy. like im genuinely happy at college, its fun and wonderful and freeing. and im happy. i hope it makes u feel a tad bit better to know that while i was gone, i was happy.

so now idk whats next. i started planning out chapter 5 part 2 today. i hope people will be there to read it. xoxo i love you .

[normal-thoughts-official]

Tbh, to me Magnus proposing to Alec is more about Magnus’ character development than about malec (it’s not me dissing on them or anything, I love them 💖). I mean, Magnus chooses to put his trust in Alec instead of succumbing to Asmodeus manipulation. Yes, technically he learns the truth from Maryse but I think it’s not so much about Magnus trusting, it’s more about Magnus thinking ‘yes, this is something my stupid idiotic self-sacrificing fool of a boyfriend would totally do and I love him so much’. Also, I always found it meaningful that Magnus literally yeets the toxic person who abused him into the void and chooses to be be with someone who loves him unconditionally. That said, I realize many people feel different and were disappointed when the proposal happened. Anyway, I’m not sure my rant even makes sense 😅

it does make sense! and i do agree with you in a sense. i just feel like they could have laid it a bit thicker? because to me it didn't feel as satisfying as i had been hoping for. i totally agree that it was an important moment for him and that the action of proposing itself was SO important but i felt like when it came to the proposal he barely had any agency (obviously yeeting asmodeus was cool and sexy but im separating the two things here, at least partially because i don't like the idea that he only did it for alec/their relationship, y'know? he did it for himself and good for him). maryse told him about it and then he rushed to save the world and proposed to him when he already knew alec was planning it AND that he would be gone (for what he believed was forever) within minutes

if magnus was to be the one to take initiative with one of their milestones for the VERY first time, i wanted it to be something he did because of his own confidence and that he could savor. i feel like everything about the circumstances took the power away from magnus making that choice. there was no real risk, and in a way, he didnt even expect that hed have to go through the consequences of that action because he thought that afterwards he would have been in hell forever. so it didn't really push foward his "growing confident in himself and their relationship" to me. it felt more like an impulsive kind of last wish thing to me. so like in a way i wish it had been more about magnus udbdisnsisns

but i do appreciate ur insight! i hope u dont see this as me fighting you, im really just chatting. and yeah in a way the fact that he decided to do this when he had just had his heart broken and every fear of his confirmed and then he still believed maryse and went after alec to have these last few moments shows that he grew confident, that he at least believed he could have this. so i do appreciate that

and magnus throwing asmodeus into the void is SO significant to me too! like he didn't kill him or banish him, he rendered him meaningless. he still existed, but he was unable to ever touch magnus or influence his life again. and all by a trap that was designed because of what was supposed to be a FAILURE in magnus' design! like he turned what would have been a glitch into a weapon and used his own creation and its limitations to get rid of his abuser where he couldnt touch him and that was just. ugh. chef's kiss

it's also so significant because when he yeeted camille he did it for raphael, but when he yeeted asmodeus he did it for himself, and it was one of the first moments where we got to see magnus choosing himself and allowing himself to be genuinely angry on his own behalf, not the downworlders or warlocks as a whole, but himself, magnus bane, because he deserved better than the abuse asmodeus put him through. and he acted out on that anger and took a stand, and it was just. ugh. everything to me

[dantespilled]

some bits of ayakos lore

a small fic but not really a fic- summary??

im not sure which lb i should make the scene happen

been thinking between lb 4 or 5

ayako couldnt think straight, slowly being dragged into more terrible depression, she doesnt sleep for long time

one of the reason is nightmares, and no one is there for her anymore

but she doesnt know

until one of them forced her to sleep, so she tried to

but for unknown reason, there is no nightmare happened

just void

“Ayako.” A voice called out to her name

ofc she was frozen in place as the voice was too familiar

dantes stepping out of darkness, pain and guilt shown in his face

"c-count..-?" she whispered, taking a step towards him, "i-is that really you..?" 

her head was pounding, tears were falling from her eyes 

he slowly nodded 

with the confirmation, she immediately ran towards him, throwing herself into his arms

them holding each other tightly, not wanting to let as they're afraid they will part once again

they def missed holding each other like this

"count, where have you been-?" he couldn't answer that and just keep silent

after a moment of silence, he decided to speak up, "...Ayako, you're hurting yourself again... You're breaking." 

Dantes had his arms around her tighten, brows were furrowed in frustration, half of his face buried on her shoulder

"You don't have to keep carrying the humanity's fate on your shoulder."

"This isn't your job, nor your fault."

he finally pulled away, but his grip on her never left, holding onto her hands, squeezing them. 

He locked his eyes with hers, Ayako can see a glint of pain in his eyes which she felt really weird since she never seen him like this he continued, "You can stop if you want, I will follow you- I will bring you somewhere safe... somewhere you don't have to worry about the humanity"

"I will take everyone out who decided to stay in your way-"

Ayako could feel herself shaking, the tears in her eyes couldn't stop falling. She wasn't sure if she is feeling happy or tremendously sad to see him over worried about her. he is the only one who ever said to her that this isn't her job. And she can stop.

"I-" The words in her throat couldn't form properly, her mind go back to the painful journey she had. People had died for her, placing trust on her to snatch the humanity back

"i can't-" She finally said, her hands squeezed back, "they had died for me-"

if she ran away, she would be sure more terrible nightmares decided come to haunt her

Dantes had a look of sorrow, but decided not to say anything against her wish. He silently chuckled dryly, really hoping that she said the otherwise, "I see.. if that is what you want, then I shall follow it..." 

his gloved hands then moved to her face, cupping her cheeks, thumbs brushing the tears away. "...If you changed your mind, I would gladly take you away. You just need to tell me about it.."

"...I will be on your side soon. So please, take care of yourself for me for now." that was the last thing she heard from him, waking up to someone calling out to her and asking what's wrong

she didnt answer their question and decided to stay strong for now, for him

[urmomification]

WOOO POG DREAM SMP AU

theres 1.8k words and 9,393 characters of a schlatt au below the cut LMAO

[i was rambling to my friend and this is what came out of it! send me an abt it if u have questions i would love to talk abt it more pls]

(slight body horror/gore tw!!)

slams fists on table rattling any dishes on the table au where schlatt doesnt die of a heartattack and tubbo locks him up to rot basically and his horns grow into his eyes effectively blinding him and chained his hands together and basically a leash on him to keep him from moving around in his cell so he cant do anything to break the horns off before they get too long and one day when technos breaking into lmanberg he gets chased into the prison and loses them in the halls before coming across schlatts cell and schlatts calling out like 'whos there i can hear ur foot steps whos there please someone whos there' etc yk and technos speechless they thought they executed him to keep him from causing any more problems in the country but this is this is just much worse than anything he even thought theyd do and hes standing in front of schlatts cell just looking at him as if hes imagining it he knew lmanberg was bad but holy fuck they just let this man rot in a cell to the point of his own horns blinding him and giving him no aid or way to ease the pain so he makes himself known and schlatt 'ive never been so happy to see, well, hear an anarchist in my life, its good to see- hear you technoblade' and chuckles and blood runs down his face like tears would, few drops landing on his clothes before techno starts trying to get into the cell to take him out of there he cant leave him here sure he was an anarchist terrorist w a murder record but he had standards and now that schlatt wasnt in power he had nothing against him really considering he isnt a citizen of lmanberg so he manages to pick the locks enough to get him out of there, schlatts arm slung over technos shoulder they stumble out of the prison building and as they slowly make their way to the nether portal to get back to technos base, they run into tubbo and quackity, schlatts old right hand men and they try to stop techno bc hes well an anarchist terrorist w a murder record but the glare techno gives them levels them and theyre left staring at each other for a moment when schlatt 'whyre we stopped whos there tech' and techno mumbles 'tubbo and quackity schlatt' and schlatt just furrows his brows as far as he can without sending excruciating pain into his eye sockets before he purses his lips and asks 'are they going to try and stop us?' techno looks back at the other two 'no they wont, isnt that right boys?' tubbo and quackity slink away allowing techno and schlatt to the portal and them going thru, schlatt still silent as he tries not to trip over technos cape or off the ledge of the bridge passing over the lava lakes, they make it to the portal and begin the walk across the arctic tundra to technos house, philza isnt there right now so its just the two of them and techno leads him up the ladder to his room (its not really a room i think its just a bed, a bell and an enchantment table) and sits him down on his bed mumbling something abt being right back and he is with some medical supplies and a change of clothes to clean everything up, they dont talk techno works in silence and when schlatt winces he mumbles a small apology before continuing eventually techno got schlatt as cleaned up as you can get someone w horns in their eyes and a sweater to keep him warm and finally starts asking questions 'how long had u been in there' 'lost count' 'did they bring you food' 'a chests worth at the beginning of the month' techno sighs 'i thought they executed you' 'tubbo chickened out despite me being 'an active threat to our peace in lmanberg' and locked me up a few days after u set the withers loose and dropped off a chest of food once a month and most of them refused to talk to me others couldnt even make eye contact with me, other than the few instances where they said things like 'heres ur food' or 'u deserve this' or 'i cant believe tubbo let u live' i talked to no one other than myself for however long i was in there' techno stands and walks around for a moment before flipping some pages and schlatt can hear him gasp quietly in mild surprise 'what is it tech' looking in the direction he heard techno from and techno says, turning to face schlatt on his bed 'schlatt that was almost 3 months ago' a single beat of silence rings for what feels like forever 'oh. i, i didnt think itd been that long. though it would explain my current predicament' loosely gesturing towards his face 'oh right abt that i have a few questions if ur ready to answer some' schlatt hums and techno grabs a pen and paper and sits next to him in case he needs to take any notes for future reference 'how fast do ur horns normally grow' 'idk just a steady amount my whole life pretty much' 'will they ever stop growing' 'they generally stop growing around 30 and continue to grow more in width than length' 'did anyone who brought u food notice' 'they grow quickly and by the time the person w the third chest came around they were getting close to my eyes but they didnt listen to me, no one did' he sighs looking down at would be his hands 'the odds of both of my horns growing into my eyes and blinding me like this are so low but of course it would happen to me' a chuckle void of any amusement 'because losing my country and my people and my power wasnt enough already' techno stands up 'you had that coming' schlatt actually laughs this time, short and curt 'ok fair, u were the one that took me down afterall' and from then on schlatt lives w techno and phil and eventually tommy and then without tommy (tommy was Not happy when he found out that schlatt was living with techno but he needed somewhere to stay too and techno happens to live in an arctic tundra where only a handful of people know how to get to so he didnt complain too much) and eventually techno saws off schlatts horns at the bend adn removes them from his eyes bc if they kept growing into his head theyd hit his brain and kill him on top of blinding  him and techno gags and almost throws up despite not being sensitive to gore  and gives schlatt a bandanna to cover the holes in his head for everyones sake and once they heal somewhat he can find something else out and thats how they live, schlatt helps with what he can like farming w phil but mostly spends his time learning braille or something so he can read and techno gets him books in braille so he isnt bored or alone like he was in the prison and he feeds him and takes care of him and schlatt is funny and entertaining despite being blinded by something from his own body and the torture it was like to rot in a cell alone for almost a 1/4 of a year and nights when techno gets home late and hes shaken and the voices are bad schlatt will sit behind him and play with his hair and talk abt his own day and rub technos back and in return when schlatt relapses and gets violent and angry techno will wash his hair and read him stories until he calms down and hopefully asleep and no one told him the news that wilbur died so when ghostbur shows up and starts talking to him he treats him the same as he would wilbur bc he cant see that hes a ghost all thats different is his speech pattern and overall personality and one day he says 'ur different wilbur what happened to that, i dunno spark u used to have' and wilbur simply 'im not sure if im being honest a lot abt me has changed since i died, or so im told i dont remember much from when i was alive' and schlatt just 0_0 and then hes scrambling down the ladder and stumbling around the house looking for techno, finding him in the basement working on something and when he gets there hes out of breath and his hands are shaking bc holy shit wilburs not only dead but a ghost and he was just talking to me and he doesnt remember what i did and and and and techno is shocked to see schlatt in the basement and asks whats up and schlatt just 'wilbur died wilbur fucking died tech why didnt anyone tell him and now hes a ghost hes a fucking ghost who lives in ur house and doesnt remember anything he doesnt remember that he blew up lmanberg does he he remembers my name but not anything that i did what hes a fucking ghost techno hes a ghost holy fuck' and technos just standing there like ??? no one no one told him 'yea philza had to kill him after he blew up lmanberg i thought u knew thats why i didnt say anything' oh. 'phil, phil had to kill him?' 'yea its a touchy subject, dont bring it up' and simply goes back to what he was working on so schlatt sits on the ground by the ladder and listens to him work his brain going a mile a minute trying to comprehend whats going on 'would i have become a ghost if theyd chosen to execute me?' 'its hard to say im unsure if theres specific circumstances that contribuite to someone becoming a ghost but theres really no telling' and goes back to working yet again and from then on they fall into an easy schedule of techno going out and doing whatever an anarchist terrorist w a murder record does on ur average wednesday and schlatt stays home reading and organizing whatever he can based on size and feeling and sleeping in windowsills and schlatt greeting techno comes home beaten up and full of new resources and a side of bruises and cuts so he tends to them, getting better at maneuvering and functioning without needing to see then techno making dinner and then curling up by the fire for the night enjoying each others company as they talk abt their days :]

[if-the-crown-fits-translate-it]

Discord pt 92

[Date: 17/03, 07:42 PM GMT - 17/03, 09:29 PM GMT]

jayyyyyyyy: “fetch, come on, cant you see this isnt doing anything to help?

just take the damn ointment”

Little-K1ng: “he... what?”

Marcus: “I back read a little bit”

Marcus: “Just not here”

fetch: “fine. you want me to be honest huh. go on look at the fucking doc. just another place where my problems turned into everyone else's.”

Little-K1ng: fetch.... you really, really need to stop lying to me. im doing my best here, im trying so hard to let things slide in the name of giving you what you need. but you are far from making it easy on me”

fetch: “we're gonna forget all this happened in 3 days time anyway. it doesn't fucking matter what i tell you or what i dont.”

Little-K1ng: “you get angry when you're stressed, you stop responding, you stop listening to reason

but-.. wait, whats going to happen in 3 days?”

Maxwell: “....prince told us that faer family is coming back in 3 days”

fetch: “the beginning of spring.”

Maxwell: “spring officially begins then”

jayyyyyyyy: “we'll get you guys back, if you somehow go back in the first place”

Little-K1ng: “so.... so i get warning, this time,

thats.... almost too cruel”

fetch: “whatever. i honestly can't be asked to care at this point.”

Marcus: “You’d really say that to Mona of all people?”

Little-K1ng: “i..... i wouldnt ask that of you”

Marcus: “...three days huh”

Little-K1ng: “i would simply fucking EXPECT IT FROM YOU. HOW THE FUCK. AM I MEANT TO FEEL. WHEN I CANT STOP GRIEVING SOMEONE. WHOS RIGHT IN FUCKING FRONT OF ME, FETCH?”

donti (e): “... mona u alright...?”

Marcus: “Is that really a question you’re asking right now?”

donti (e): “ah.. sorry.”

jayyyyyyyy: “honestly at this point im willing to chuck a bucket of weedkiller at fetch's head”

Marcus: “Jeight.”

donti (e): “hey hey lets not get hastyy”

Little-K1ng: “i... [huff] i .... [sniff] i just.. i shouldnt have yelled i....”

Marcus: “This isn’t helping”

fetch: “i... you're expecting too much from me. i mean. you expect me to care at this point? when death is coming to our door and all we can do is throw on a little sprinkler? when all we can do is sit in a huddle and wait until these vines in our skulls fully bloom?”

donti (e): “... we discussed possible solutions to the buds if you.. want to change subject.. or not”

jayyyyyyyy: “fetch, the thing about this is that we have a fighting chance

we lose that chance if you stop fighting”

Little-K1ng: “im expecting you to fucking try, fetch. im expecting you to understand that we're all going through this, and every time you lie to me, to us, you cost us more time we could have spent trying to fix it”

fetch: “how would it help, by piling on more and more to the shitheap we have already? you're not supposed to worry about me. ive always been able to handle myself.”

Maxwell: “please ⌇⏁⍜⌿arguing....why are we arguing.....”

Marcus: “..”

Void: “...”

Little-K1ng: “wh... what did you just...?”

Maxwell: “....what....”

fetch: “...”

Maxwell: “why are...”

Marcus: “Max..”

Maxwell: “why are you staring at me what”

Marcus: “Can you say what you just said again”

Little-K1ng: “that sounded like...”

donti (e): “max...”

Little-K1ng: “say that again, max”

Marcus: “Please”

jayyyyyyyy: “actually maybe dont”

Marcus: “Max say it again”

jayyyyyyyy: “that. i think fighting is causing the process to speed up”

Maxwell: “please stop arguing....why are we arguing.....?”

Little-K1ng: “i... thats not what i heard”

donti (e): “... lets stop arguing”

Marcus: “That’s..that’s what I thought you said

You just

Didn’t say it like that”

Maxwell: “but i did”

fetch: “...yall still think I need to be priority right now?”

Maxwell: “thats what i said”

jayyyyyyyy: “you, uh, said "stop" in enderspeak”

Maxwell: “what no i didnt”

Marcus: “Fetch. This is going to be you so kindly shut the fuck up about not being a priority”

Little-K1ng: “fetch, you fail to recognize that you're always my priority, even if you're kind of an ass”

Marcus: “Max it’s okay

I told you it would be okay”

Little-K1ng: “max, hug?”

Maxwell: “why....why are you all acting so weird?”

Little-K1ng: “its alright, max”

jayyyyyyyy: “we're all just stressed mate”

Maxwell: “are yall okay?”

donti (e): “weere fine its fine..”

Maxwell: “its?

look im not a child you can tell me whats going on”

Marcus: “We told you”

fetch: “you spoke in ender.”

Marcus: “You denied it”

donti (e): “you spoke ender.”

Maxwell: “you....youre kidding right?”

jayyyyyyyy: “nope”

Maxwell: “ha funny joke”

jayyyyyyyy: “we're not joking”

fetch: “for once im not lying.”

Marcus: “You told us to tell you.

We told you.”

Little-K1ng: “here, come in for a hug, wont you?”

Maxwell: “no no no no no”

Little-K1ng: “ive got you, max”

Maxwell: “i couldnt have no”

jayyyyyyyy: “hold on, hes panicking”

Little-K1ng: “its the stress, max

its alright, im here”

jayyyyyyyy: “mona, give him a little space”

Maxwell: “no no no stay please”

jayyyyyyyy: “i never said for anyone to leave

are you okay with being given hugs, or would you rather not?”

Maxwell: “im okay with it”

LLyr: “they’ve kind of established max likes the contact at this point i think”

jayyyyyyyy: “yeah, but you can never be too careful”

LLyr: “fair enough”

Little-K1ng: “i appreciate the concern for max, jayx8″

fetch: “I. i would offer a hug but I'm not feeling up to it. i think I'm just gonna go for a walk.”

jayyyyyyyy: “its

Little-K1ng: “fetch...”

jayyyyyyyy: “​hm”

Maxwell: “i dont wanna go back no no please no”

Little-K1ng: “i would rather you not go out where the court roams

you got in one good bite, let it be enough”

fetch: “i'll stick nearby.

i just need to get out of the house.”

Little-K1ng: “stay where you can see the road, alright? text me if you need a pickup”

jayyyyyyyy: “stay near the neighborhood. go to the mineshaft if you need to”

fetch: “yeah. got it. later.”

Maxwell: “I'm scared”

donti (e): “...”

Little-K1ng: “oh, max...”

Maxwell: “oh no oh god oh merde”

donti (e): “sh shsshshh max its fine.

calm down its alright.”

Little-K1ng: “tell you what, we can destress with some hot cocoa? with the tiny colorful marshmallows you like?”

Marcus: “I can go make it

I don’t think max wants to be alone right now”

jayyyyyyyy: “maybe watch some movies? ones that uh, dont have kidnapping in them, too. moana would be good?”

Little-K1ng: “i dont actually.. own any movies

i dont watch them”

donti (e): “youtube videos ?”

Little-K1ng: “that works”

[They watch a video of an otter for a while, and discuss the events from earlier this day. Max thinks that the wreathe mayn’t be as bad as everyone thinks it’ll be, as it will have calendula marigolds which are good for helping to heal.]

Little-K1ng: “....ah.. they are, but maybe..... nah, nevermind.... ill let you enjoy the thought”

Maxwell: “they may be fully metal but still...maybe then can help the family....”

Marcus: “...”

Little-K1ng: “.........”

Maxwell: “what?”

Marcus: “..yeah max, that’s a nice thought”

Maxwell: “i thought so too!”

Little-K1ng: “i cant believe.... im staring down the barrel of either losing all 3 of you... or going with you and not remembering any of this... that hurts, and it hasnt even happened yet”

Marcus: “Well

I don’t know if this will comfort you or not

But you might not entirely forget this”

Little-K1ng: “true! this is honestly the happiest thing to happen to me in an incredibly long time, there is a chance itll stick”

Marcus: “Baron and Prince remember their childhoods a little bit”

Maxwell: “stick...sticky...ha honey is sticky but not good

tastes yucky”

Marcus: “...I remembered Elizabeth and I learning codes

....max?”

Maxwell: “hm?

something wrong?”

Marcus: “What was that about honey just now?”

Maxwell: “oh!

well mona said stick

and stick is one letter off from sticky!

and hony is really sticky

but i dont like honey”

Marcus: “...got it

Maxwell: “bleh”

Marcus: “Okay yeah that

That makes sense”

Maxwell: “yeah!”

Little-K1ng: “i wish i hadnt snapped at fetch like that... maybe when he comes back i can give him a proper apology”

Maxwell: “hm perhaps that would be good

family should get along”

[this message was deleted shortly afterwards]

Marcus: “....”

Little-K1ng: “i...?”

Maxwell: “what?”

Marcus: “M..ax?”

Little-K1ng: “max?”

Maxwell: “god damn it did i speak fucking ender again or some shit???”

Marcus: “N..no”

Little-K1ng: “n..no.....”

Maxwell: “the fuck happened then? yall look freaked out”

Marcus: “Um”

Little-K1ng: “nevermind! :)!!”

Maxwell: “hm.....if youre sure...”

Marcus: “I must be tired, it’s fine Max! :)”

Maxwell: “youve been sleeping a lot man you sure?”

Marcus: “Yeah, gotta be tired to sleep a lot right”

Maxwell: “I guess”

Little-K1ng: “are you guys...... hungry?”

[The conversation switches to the topic of making brownies and other baked goods. There was also small talk about methods of removing the growing wreathe buds that had been suggested earlier in the day. Mona suggests cutting one of the buds off, if Max could handle it. Jack and Marcus argue over their priorities: their concern for Max and their family respectively. After snipping off a small part of the buds, the following conversation ensures:]

Marcus: “...he’s not bleeding”

donti (e): “can you guys take a look at what mona cut off?”

emuhlee: “well, that part is good?”

Maxwell: “theres some time of fucking liquid ow”

Marcus: “It looks like that...cellulose that comes out of dandelions”

Little-K1ng: “Hhhhhhhhh”

Marcus: “Mona?

donti (e): “is max alright??”

Marcus: “Uh..in pain?”

dreaming: “uh get a towel?”

Marcus: “It’s not a lot”

Maxwell: “that really hurt jesus fucking christ”

Marcus: “Have you never picked a dandelion?

It’s like that”

Little-K1ng: “That's kinda. Gross”

Jack the Observer: “it's not blood though, right?”

Maxwell: “my headache is much worse....”

Little-K1ng: “No not blood”

Marcus: “It’s..

Huh”

donti (e): “blood substitute?”

Marcus: “It stopped”

Jack the Observer: “huh.”

Marcus: “......”

donti (e): “hey what happened to the bud”

Marcus: “Mona

Mona look”

Marcus: “Mona there’s two more”

Maxwell: “God damn it is this fucking Hercules or some shit”

Jack the Observer: “pft”

donti (e): “well.

we can at least look at the bud that was cut off.”

Marcus: “It’s just sitting there”

[The conclusion from this experiment was that the buds have nerve endings, which is why it hurt Maxwell and worsened his headache when it was cut, even after being numbed with ice prior to cutting. People ask about Fetch’s whereabouts. This was his last known update to the document:]

[With this information, people begin to speculate that Fetch might not be back for a while…]

[edge-lorde]

hp update: its been a long time, boys. ud think that with this plague outbreak id have more time for shitty phone games, and ud be right! however, the time i normally might use to make tumblr posts has been taken up by reading lotr orc fanfiction non-stop for at least 1 full month. id still be in the thick of that obsession even now if only the fics would update. that is how i find you today folks, for the first time in many weeks i am staring at a screen with nothing to do. so come with me friends, theres no better way to fill the soulless void we are all in than reading a nice long tumbler post. 

disclaimer, first of all, a lot has happened, i prefer to keep these updates as plot spoiler free as possible but do to extenuating circumstances i feel like it is necessary to say, [SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER BELOW]

that rowan fucking died,

i wont say exactly how, but i will say that her death was animated as were animations of myself and a few others reacting to our friend fresh corpse. obviously meant to be serious moments but the animations made it seem almost comical. 

i saw at least one post going around right after this update that was like ‘how could the game devs do this to us..... how could they hate rowan so.... this is punishment from on high’ and its like.... u guys do know what a story is right? the events of  a story are not typically done to punish less faithful fans, im pretty sure they were planning to kill rowan off from the beginning. this isnt disney im pretty sure the writers are not writing each chapter the night before its released by popular vote. 

that little “are we drifting away..?” scene with rowan makes more sense now. there was a bit in one of the scenes where the kids all reminisce on rowans life and the mc talks about it being the last real one on one time they had with rowan. a nice bitter sweet moment. i dont hate this turn of events. its a good reminder that actions have consequences and we are way past they days of “should i wear a hat or scarf?” its YA time now. 

i did manage to take 1 screenshot from this time, i had commented that before that when rowan said she didnt have many friedns that barnaby seemed to be hanging out with her without be there as a friend buffer and here was his reaction to her death:

;_;

the funniest part in all of this however, was of course cedericks reaction to rowans death “but she was so young....” LOL fuckin RIP.

lets see... what else.... i forget a lot of what happened but i think there was a time sensitive quidditch event in there somewhere? if so i  dont remember it. what i do remember of the quidditch pals is that im gonna play beater now, skye is being weird and cagey about it, andre is involved.... the others are there.....

sidenote, i love the shitty b characters they throw in to be like yes you know this person but no they are not cool enough for u to even think about befriending. the first one of those is face paint kid, and now we have another, who is a former beater girl with horrible bangs named bean who didnt go to any classes for a whole season so she could just play ball 24/7 and got kicked off the team.  this is a character who only exists to provide an explanation as to why there would be a beater position open but i love them on principle. 

right now im in the midst of another time sensitive event, this one is a bother-your-brother-at-work-day event where recent hogwarts graduate bill weasley is bullied by myself and his younger brother charlie into letting us go with him on one of his curse breaking jobs. 

so for those unfamiliar, bill works for the magical bank of england.... and his job seems to be “retrieving treasure” for said bank. in the books, there is a bit where he takes his family on one of his trips to egypt, where his job seemed to have been tomb plundering indiana jones style for the posterity of the english bank :X. i wont explain here why thats bad but its bad. 

the game devs however in this instance, at least SEEM to be doing what jkr couldnt do by attempting to salvage what is left of gringotts bank and form it into not a super shitty implications factory run by horrible jewish caricatures. bills mission is to retrieve a goblin made artifact that was taken by dragons, so no going to foreign countries to steal things from other people! only going to a dragon reserve to rifle through animal nests. they even appear to be providing us with a likable goblin character, egad!  

my hope for this event is that we get a plotline about how maybe, goblins arent shifty human haters for no reason, and in fact they hate magic humans for very understandable reasons, like being forced to go into hiding with the rest of the magical world even though only the humans wanted to do that, and maybe despite running the bank in england they still dont have a lot of political sway in the world of wizards and witches, and have to rely on the faith that said wizards and witches wont fuck them over at every turn, even as they see how they treat other non-humans, such as house elves, which they desperately dont want to end up like. and maybe they DONT only care about gold... maybe thats a human stereotype based on the fact that theres a long history of humans not respecting goblin ownership customs.... which i could get into..... but i wont.... i just....... very badly dont want them to suck ;__________;

i know i said its ok to still like a piece of media as long as you recognize the problems with it, and i do, but once this game is done im gonna stop hp posting all together. ive been feeling more and more uncomfortable making these posts lately.  

GENERAL GAME NOTES; theres been some new layout changes and such. 

most notably the stairs screen has been changed from a bulleted list of all locations to a screen with tiles picturing an image of each location along with the name + icons of all classes at each place. there is one additional location that is new and yet to be unlocked, and the dragon reservation is appearing temporarily as its own tile as well. i prefer this method of getting in and out of a temporary location to how they did it with car during the last christmas special. the stairs icon also now stays in the corner when you scroll through locations, allowing you to open the stairs menu without scrolling all the way back to the left. 

they also moved a few of the buttons down into the lower left corner rather than the left side & combined the story button and sidequest button. they added a little camera button as well, just like in the dormitory, that makes all the icons in a location disappear and look better for screenshots. 

the daily special add offer thing now has its own button in the top right corner of the screen, and idk if i mentioned it before but now there are daily challenges that appear in the sidequest screen that offer small rewards for completing 3 tasks per day + a better one if u get all 3. the prizes are things like 4 energy, 75 coins, 3 monster food. the better rewards are usually either more coins, 8 energy, 3 gems, or 1 notebook. i think that it does all the different color notebooks but i cant remember for sure if i ever saw the gold one up as a reward. i like this addition in any case. if you dont pick up ur reward by the end of the day, the next time u log on it will force u to stop and accept them, and if one of the rewards is energy and ur energy bar is full, it does not seem to stack beyond the bar so watch out.

 the character stats page is now more zoomed out so you can see your full character instead of just from the waist up. no change to the leaderboard. rowans face in the friendship roster is now a still black and white image that says ur friend may be gone but friendship is forever u-u. 

rowan has been removed from all classes. in the classes where the minigames involved her, those minigames have passed the mantle onto other friends in the class. in potions that person is now liz helping u find stuff off the shelves and in tranfiguration that person is badeea. bless these girls for helping mc get through it. touched my heart. 

theres been a few fun little “i know u have more free time now so uhhhh have some energy” prizes like they do sometimes when they dont update on schedule so thats been nice. just a few days ago they gifted us 3 gold notebooks the same way. :O. 

theres also been a few instances of a energy happy hour where for a limited time energy takes less time to refresh. normally it takes 4 mins for 1 energy to do this but during happy hour its like 2:30 mins. :U its all very interesting.

and that will have to do it for tonight my friends, ill do a post for the dragon event when its done because i do like it so far and i do like getting to bully bill with charlie. 

until next time, remember.......

[bitethehandthatfeeds]

I'm really tired. Like really really fucking tired, of existing and doing things, and i realised recently that i have always been this way. As far back as I can remember into my childhood, barring the really fucked up and traumatic parts of it, I have always been ill. I have always been so empty as a person, you know? so i try to fill the giant black fucking void inside me where emotion would be with bullshit and random things. After my father left. It was just. My mom was so fucking angry all the time so i just kind of sat in my room and stared at the wall. I had to keep the same mattress that i had since i was 5 years old until i was 10 and i cried every time i had to change the sheets because there were these huge patches of bloodstains all over it, and my mom claimed it hurt her inside, too much to deal with so she made me fucking do it. And i didn't even fucking remember what the blood was from, but i knew it made me sob so hard i couldnt stand up, every. single. time. And so at first it started out as drawing things and reading comics and throwing myself really hard into being a ballerina and then i got older and things just got so much fucking worse and i started thinking really fucked up shit that kids, or anyone really, should never think, because like, honestly what the actual fuck is wrong with me? and then i got older and i started to fill the void with drugs and drinking and sex with people 10 years older than me and it made me sick to my stomach, but then i met this guy, right? this guy and he's great and the kindest person i have ever met and he is so gentle with me all the time and when i come over to his house he literally just lets me sleep in his bed because its warm and safe and smells like his cologne and then i got older and my skin didn't fit right and any time someone reached for me i flinched and i couldn't even breathe at night because i was alone, in my room, and i couldn't sleep and i never fucking slept, and my mom hated me and i hated her more and things started getting bad again and i got the shit beat out of me at school because i was a weird faggot and then i went home and got the shit beat out of me because i was a weird faggot and i hated everything and so i almost drank myself into a fucking coma and my mom found me in a ditch and I had my stomach pumped and then i came home and got the shit beat out of me again. And then I got older, right? And I am blindly fucking in love with another stupid guy and he's scared because he's transgender and he saw the things that happened to me and he and i would quite literally kill for eachother, we're that blindly fucking in love. And then i go to therapy and the therapist tells me i have trauma and asks me to talk about my childhood and then the pieces click together and i realise that my body is not my own, was never my own, my father ruined me and i want to claw my own insides out. So i start prescription pills and drinking, but they're together this time, woo-hoo! Brothers in arms, partners in crime, fucking up my insides, one day at a time. I'm sick all the time now and i get the shit beat out of me at least every three days because my mom is fucked up in the head too And i don't even realise it but i have stopped talking to the person i love so much i would kill for, and then he's calling me one day when i'm in the bathtub at home about to see if i can cut into an artery this time, you know, and maybe not be such a disappointment even in death, and he's telling me that he's breaking up with me and that he loves me but i've hurt him, and instead of cutting into my arm i sit in the bathtub and stare at the wall until the water is cold and my eyes glaze over. And I pick myself up off the tile and I drink an entire bottle of jack daniels and sob-vomit-scream until my guts are raw and I'm bleeding on the inside. And then suddenly I'm 16 and i have my whole fucking life in front of me, but i don't want it, i don't deserve it, and i am such a fucking loser. And i am so fucking selfish, and self centered and terrible and I'm hacking myself up again and drinking like an alkie and smoking like a fucking chimney and i hate everyone else but i hate myself more, and everything feels so bleak and fucking hopeless all the time. I sit, and I rot. I draw people being flayed, people being stabbed and people being crucified because I feel like I'm the one who deserves it. And I keep a list of the people who would actually care if I killed myself and it’s tragically short and I read comics still because i am so so lonely and I watch shitty 80's horror films and most of my relationships with people go like this: "Hi, wow, we’re both pretty pathetic. We should talk about that. Get to know each other? Maybe I'll tell you who i am on the inside if you make me feel ok for a little while. Where did you grow up? This same small town? No fucking way, me too! I’m just like you. Do you want to go makeout in my car? Great! Can I have your phone number? Maybe we can stay up late and talk about things in our life that are little more than frivolous details, because we're both too afraid to be sincere. yeah, I have a lot of scars. I wish I cared enough to tell you about them! Here, I wrote a poem about you, it has 40 lines and none of them make sense, and later when I read it I'll scream into the pillow stained with my own blood. Here, Have my entire heart, it's yours to keep, free of fucking charge. Do you want to hold hands? No? Do you still want to be friends? or maybe you'll date someone else while I cry at night. That sounds good. Maybe I should stare into the mirror until I can't recognise myself anymore, and maybe I should bleed out on the floor. Maybe i should stop doing so much fucking cocaine. Haha, Do you feel that? That buzzing? No? It’s incessant. Still don't feel it? Maybe there’s too much going on right now. Here, we can leave. we can go somewhere quiet. maybe our graves. Now do you feel it? Still no? You're sure? Positive? Great. Me neither. I’m just like you."  And i know killing myself is wrong and dumb and selfish and yeah i'm gonna feel better one day, but for now i am so weary, and so fucking tired that all i want to do it lay in the soft dirt and let the world keep spinning, without me, because it's so much easier, and i am a terrible, horrible selfish person.

[voidsfanficfortress]

A bit of life

Madrid's streets were noisy today, jackal hides under the collar of his dark purple trenchcoat, his footsteps are drowned by the vigorous life, walking around him, laughing, buying and so much more.

His eyes catch the green light of the pharmacy sign,just a couple of blocks and he Will be there, and soon enough back to his apartment.

He often ponders why he doesnt go out more often, for example, today the blue Sky hasnt had a single cloud on it, the sunrays were quite nice, and people didnt seem to bother him so much, and yes, the fresh air does make his head a bit clearer.

The little bell hanging just above the pharmacy's Door clinks as he enters, the place buzzing with people of all walks of life, children and their mothers, teens who are helping with some chores, and older people buying whatever medications they were prescripted.

And talking about prescriptions, he was just on his way to collect his.

-hello , how May I help you-The pharmacist said , with a smile on her face, and bags under her eyes.

That tired smile is something ryad knows very well, he slips the doctors note as he gives a few details about the sleeping pills.

The woman nodds, saying she would be right back with the medication.

Jackal's eye scan the room,there is certain atmosphere of peace that seems weird to him.

He supposes its because of his line of work, always running around, Saving the world and training as if tomorrow is the day the world ends.

Now he is not the sappy type, but seeing siblings playing and talking makes his heart warm, altough a certain thought,or well demon, creeps from time to time,kind of jealous he didnt get to experience that.

But then a certain girl enters the pharmacy, he guesses shes in her teenage Years,maybe around sixteen, behind her is whats he supposes her younger brother.

the girl tries to Grab something from a high shelf, seeing that she couldnt, her brother made a quick excuse and his big eyes looked for the tallest person in the room.

Ryad.

The boy approached him and with a very shy tone he asked.

-Excuse me , could you help my big sister over there?-

Jackal looked over at the woman who was standing there with the medication, she nodds as a way to tell him to go and help the girl.

He quickly walks over and grabs the item the girl needed.

-Thank you sir!-the younger sibling said.

The girl picks the item from ryads hand.

-Im sorry he went to bother you Sir-she says grabbing the boys hand, walking to the queue.

-its not a big deal really, he didnt bother me at all, nor helping you-

She looks up at him, finally figuring out who he is, ryad seem to notice it as he grabs his pills.

-I wont make a scene here, but im a big fan sir, of everything you've done in your time in team rainbow...and I also heard the rumors about your life here, if they are true, im really sorry about what happened to,well, your brother- she looks down- im im sorry,If I came off as blunt there or too nosy,I just..as an older sibling I can understand the pain, and I just wanted you to know that uh, I I sympathize with you-now she is just a Fumble of words.

Ryad finds it really cute, he chuckles and shakes his head.

-Hey kid , its okay, I get it, its really nice of you-

The girls cheeks are red, she quickly pays for her stuff and thanks him again, speeding to the door as her brother makes fun of her for getting so flustered.

The cashier sighs.

-Kids right?- Jackal nodds- they recently moved here, that little girl over there?, she is so Smart for her age, well, Also went trough a lot from what I heard, sometimes kids can be mean to good people-

Jackal pays and quickly glances over his shoulder, there is no-one after him.

-How so?-Now he is the one that doesnt want to be too nosy.

-well, kid got throw into a Primary school with a bunch of shady kids,kids are mean and well, now she is here, still strong-

Jackal pieces the parts togheter, and sighs.

-But, she is always nice with everyone, and from what I saw, she liked you, trust me here, if the kid doesnt like you, she doesnt talk with you...at all, you Sir, are the lucky few she trusted right away-

Both share a chuckle and ryad leaves the place, walking slowly back to his apartment.

His mind thoughts about everything that happened there.

Some of his turmoil clears out, Knowing that he is not that bad of a person he thinks he is sometimes.

After a couple of minutes he is finally in the complex where his apartment is ,The keys on the door click,now it is Open and ryad enters his home.

He leaves the pills on the table and looks at the time.

'Already afternoon?' he thinks.

Soon enough the smell of food invades the house, ryad seems calm until the fast footsteps approaching down the corridor are heard.

-come on lau!, we are going to be late for lunch!-

-Im coming im coming!!, youre too fast !-

Those are the voices of the siblings in the pharmacy.

He shakes his head and chuckles.

He does need to get out more often.

[...]

-Void☣

[collectionofdestiel]

Life is Weird

Prompt from Chagnon1022: A story where castiel assumes dean is cheating based on a phone call he over heard but it turns out dean was talking to his brother Sam so he could  him advise to propose to cas

~

Days turned quickly to months which unfolded rapidly into years. It felt as though one day Castiel was alone in this world with little in the bank and a less than stellar outlook on life, then the next he was sharing life with who he believed to be his soul mate. Life was weird, he decided, as he procrastinated starting his day by laying in their shared bed with only a wrinkly sheet flung across his skin. Weird in a way that it felt like yesterday he had none of what he had now.

Finally deciding that thinking over his lonely past was only going to make it that much harder to get out of bed, he threw his feet from the bed and onto the floor. His body twisted a little too fast so he took a moment to sit and wait for his head to clear. There was nothing on the schedule for today which meant that he and his boyfriend could spend a lazy day together.

That thought caused a slow smile to grace his features and gave him the motivation he needed to finally stand. After throwing on a pair of clean boxers he padded from their bedroom toward the kitchen, already smelling bacon and eggs.

“I don’t know, I mean, how did you do it?” Dean’s rough voice broke through the crisp late morning air.

Castiel stopped his feet in the hallway, curiosity perked his ears. Maybe it was a work call? It was odd that Dean would be on the phone on a Saturday especially before noon. There was no secret Dean wasnt a morning person, and it also wasn’t a secret he hated talking on the phone.

“Well, I cant do that.” Huffing a laugh, Dean’s voice then dropped to a whisper. “I can’t just tell him that.”

Curiosity peaking ever higher hearing the low tone of his boyfriend’s voice, Castiel tip toed so he could pressed himself against the wall beside the doorway. He knew he shouldn’t spy, and should definitely make his presense known, but for some reason that old feeling of lonliness started to flood his system and make his body feel too weak to dare make a move.

“I mean, I love you, but that is dumb. Just cause it worked for you doesn’t mean it will for me. One, how the hell am I supposed to do that without him knowing since we have a shared bank account and two, that’s like a four hour drive.”

It took all of his will to not gasp, to not succumb to the ice water now plunging through his veins and freezing over his heart. Had he misheard?

Dean sighed deeply and almost comically. “Tonight? I can’t do it tonight. I need more time to… think it over and get everything ready.”

Castiel didnt notice how his body gave out, his knees easily supporting his descent to the ground. It was subconscious how he curled himself into a ball and listened as the love of his life cancelled plans with someone else, someone who Dean loved.

“Don’t give me that, alright? I’m not scared… I’m just… How am I supposed to say it? I’m gonna sound like an ass.” Dean’s words were so tender, so lost and desperate, that for a moment before Castiel realized the weight of it he felt bad for Dean.

He wanted to reach out and hold onto him, beg him to not leave, scream and plea until his soul was nothing but ash. Castiel wanted to grip onto Dean and shake him and demand why he wasnt good enough, why they couldnt have made each other happy and live together forever.

A clank from dishware broke the delicate tension in the air. “Because I said so! Look, forget I called you, ok? I can handle it. I’ll see you at the Roadhouse on wednesday, ok? We can talk more then about it.”

Castiel let the loneliness find it’s home in his chest. He stood up, too numb to feel him going through the motions. Standing in the hallway he listened for the goodbye, the farewell between lovers, before he tried to decide what his  next move was. Was there a next move? What was left in his desolate world now that he found himself where he was all those years ago.

“Yeah, yeah, I love you, too. Talk to you soon.”

Life’s weird isn’t it, Castiel thought to himself void of emotion, that in what feels like a blink of an eye everything is suddenly different.

It wasn’t until a light humming from the kitchen broke the silence did Castiel dare move. He stepped as quietly as he could from around the corner, his eyes falling immedietly on his boyfriends back. Tears erupted before he could stop them, flowed so violently that he lost his breath and choked.

Spinning around, Dean met his eyes. The surprised green soon turned worried and panicked. Dropping the spatula onto the skillet Dean rounded their island and started toward Cas with open arms. “Sweetheart, what’s wrong?”

Just before they could come in contact Castiel shook his head and took a step back, the tears starting to soak his collar bone. With a heaving breath he curled his arms into his chest and tried so desperately to claw him way out of his panic.

“Cas? Hey, I’m right here. Talk to me. Breathe.” Dean’s voice was so broken, so loving that it was the final crack in Castiel’s resolve.

Clearing the tears from his vision, Cas looked into Dean’s eyes with no emotion. “I’ll be going to the market in a couple minutes. If you could pack your things before I get back I think that would be best.”

Dean coiled back as if struck. “Wh-what?”

“I don’t think we need to make it any bigger than it needs to be. I’m giving you the out. You don’t have to be so worried about telling me. Just leave.” Castiel turned his eyes downward and took a shuddering breath that burned the bottom of his lungs. “I’m sorry that I wasn’t enough.”

Dean Winchester stared at his boyfriend. Nothing came from his mouth though he tried to open it to get something out, to question why and to demand an answer to this sudden turn. Instead he stood there, in nothing but his own boxers and an apron, barefoot in their kitchen. He was too shocked to feel the way his entire world was collapsing around him.

“Please.” The word was broken and hitched falling from Cas’ lips. “Please, Dean, if you loved me at all during these few years you will just leave.”

“Why?” Finally his brain started to catch up to the situation. And though he wanted to be angry, angry that Castiel was doing this, he stayed calm. He took deep breaths and stayed calm because whatever was happening it couldnt be blown any farther out of proportion or there wasn’t going to be a possible fix.

Blue eyes soaked in heartbreak flicked up to meet defeaning green. “Because I love you and I can’t stand here and pretend that you didn’t fall in love with someone else.”

“What?!” Dean’s voice cracked from the pressure of the single word.

“I heard you.” Cas waved his arm toward the cell phone sitting on the counter. “Talking to your… your…”

“Brother?” Dean finished the sentence with a pointed look. “Just now? I was on the phone with Sammy.”

Castiel tilted his head as he met Dean’s eyes. “I listened to you make plans behind my back.”

Swallowing visibly, Dean wiped the back on his hand across his forehead. “Sweetheart, there’s a reason-”

“Right.” Castiel nodded, feeling anger flare up his spine. “You really want to lie to me, Dean Winchester?”

“No!” Dean shouted in frustration. “I’m not lying! I fucking love you and I haven’t so much as thought about being with anyone since I met you.”

His eyes drifting back to the phone, Castiel wanted to believe him, wanted to stop this now and hug him and live happily ever after. But that wasn’t life. It wasn’t life when his mother used to believe all his father’s lies. And it wasn’t life when he watched his brother be cheated on by multiple partners.

“Castiel.” Dean took a slow step toward his boyfriend. “I love you more than you’re letting yourself believe right now. And I know that you have issues with cheating and your self worth and so… I need to tell you. Even if we both regret it later. But, sweetheart…”

Fingers slid under his chin, a little force tilted his head so that he could see Dean right in front of him, their muggy breaths mixing between them. All Castiel could see was love, he felt as though he was drowning in it, sinking so low that he might never resurface.

“I’ve been carrying around a ring. I’ve been putting a little of my paycheck away toward it for about a year now. And this morning I called Sam because I have been killing myself over not finding the right moment to ask you. So I called him to ask how he asked Jess, and how he knew when the perfect moment would be.” Leaning forward slightly, Dean wrapped his other arm around Cas’ shoulders to bring them closer without losing eye contact. “I want to marry you, Cas. I want it to be just you and me forever if you’ll let me.”

Castiel’s face collapsed in a sob grimace as his shoulders started to shake and he threw himself against Dean’s chest. His body gave out as he cried and cried and let the waves of emotion roll through him. After minutes ticking by of Dean holding him and whispering to him and pressing kisses to his hair, Castiel finally pulled back.

With a shaky smile he whispered, “I want nothing more than to marry you.”

Dean’s lips turned up into a face splitting smile before he closed the distance between their lips.

Years later, in what feels like a blink of an eye, Castiel is standing in the hospital with his eyes trained on a small sleeping form wrapped in a pink blanket thinking that it feels like just yesterday he said ‘yes’ to a lifetime of happiness.

[blookmallow]

I FINALLY GOT SKYRIM MARRIED

i have a BEAUTIFUL WIFE

...who i went through a lot of shit for. this is. a lot of exposition, bear with me :’) im very invested in my character’s personal story here

so astrid had a very important special job for me and sent me to markarth to speak with the client directly

it turned out to be the apothecary’s assistant, who i was passingly familiar with already, so i imagine it was a bit of a surprise to both of us, but she got right to the point - a man broke her heart and ruined her life, used her to hurt the people close to her, abandoned her to go become a bandit, now she wants him dead

u can probably imagine where this is going,

this is the first time ive had a dark brotherhood job i was legitimately PSYCHED to carry out, you BET ill go fuck this guy up for you id do this for free

however, she also had... another request, one that wasn’t required, but something she really, really wanted

see she was very close with/practically another daughter to the shatter-shields in windhelm, the wealthy family who recently lost a daughter to the windhelm butcher

alain had manipulated her and used her to get to the shatter-shields, i dont remember if he stole from them or what happened there, but whatever it was, the shatter-shields blamed muiri for this and disowned her, throwing her out onto the streets with nothing

so she was used and had her heart broken by a man she loved, then was told it was Her Fault, and lost her home and her friends/the closest thing to family she had all at once, and was so hurt and desperate she turned to the dark brotherhood to get revenge on them all

she wanted me to kill nilsine too, the shatter-shields’ other daughter

SO we have this really complicated situation where, on the one hand, she wants alain dead for using her and ruining her life and hurting her friends, and like, he’s a bandit leader now, so he’s someone i probably would’ve easily killed off anyway, by “this is a video game not real life”/skyrim standards that’s a no brainer, i have no moral conflict with that and can’t wait to slash this guy’s head off

but on the other hand she’s so broken she wants a woman who used to be her best friend/practically her sister dead too. i dont know what nilsine’s role in this was specifically but these people were essentially her family, and they victim blamed her when she needed their support the most and threw her out with nothing and nowhere to go

and i had already done quests with the shatter-shields before this, so like, i know them too, and they’re sort of friends to me, i helped solve the mystery of their other daughter’s murder and now I’m being asked to kill the other. not to mention everyone’s going to think the butcher’s back/there’s a copycat killer/something and it’s gonna cause a panic again (even if the game doesn’t acknowledge that/directly show that happening, y’know) 

killing someone’s daughter when they’re still in mourning over the first, when they’ve come to trust you, when you’re the one who helped them gain closure over that first death already, is just. a stone cold thing to do

especially looking at it from my character’s perspective, she’d be especially torn on this because she’s a mother herself, but her children are girls she rescued from the streets - lucia was thrown away by her family, sofie was a victim of tragedy and was let down by the people in authority who should have protected and helped her

so medea would relate to tova as a mother and a friend but also relate powerfully with muiri as a victim in this

ultimately i don’t think there’s any real justification to kill nilsine here, i dont think you can really morally defend that, but. i was so drawn to muiri and wanted so badly to give her a shot at a better life and help her heal from all this, and knew she would become a marriage option if i did it bc id seen her name on the marriage options list before, her story fits in so well with medea’s, and like, i dont imagine im gonna have a lot of options for wives who would Know about my connection to the dark brotherhood/the things ive done and be okay with it, so if i went with her, there wouldn’t be a “keeping this horrible secret from my wife” aspect to deal with even though the game probably doesn’t acknowledge it if you do (i mean im still. keeping it from my kids, but. y’know. when they’re older)

and “talk this out with her and help her see how badly her mind’s been warped by the pain she’s been through” isn’t an option given to you, so

in the end i went through with it. killing alain was easy, just like any other bandit camp raid, but to get at nilsine without being caught, i had to sneak into their house when the family was asleep

which i expected would involve a lot of careful sneaking and laborious lock picking

until i realized i could just walk right in

because the door was already unlocked for me. because they consider me a friend and allow me into their home

and that somehow made it so much worse

i killed nilsine with an arrow, nobody heard a thing, and i ran for it before anyone saw me in there or realized what had happened

muiri gave me a special ring as a “symbol of her affection” for doing this, which i think is about the biggest sign i coulda hoped for lmao

i held off on considering marriage for the time though and finally decided i had to go back to windhelm to see if there was anything i could do to make amends to the shatter-shields even though they shouldn’t know it was me/make sure i didnt get seen by a guard without realizing it or something (though it wouldn’t probably matter anyway, guards saw me leave the orphanage immediately after grelod’s death and shrugged that off, so,)

my name’s still clear in windhelm, but...

tova committed suicide after she discovered what happened

she couldn’t cope with losing another daughter

so now the father is the only one left, coping with. the death of his entire family occurring within like a couple months

i didnt see what happened here i came back later so i dont know if this is something you can possibly stop or if its possible to witness the moment they find nilsine or tova’s suicide or if this just Inevitably happens whenever you come back

i feel terrible about this but theres. not really any going back now,

so. i went back to muiri

i dont know if this is what everyone says or not but her response was just. “i mean, yeah, why wouldn’t I be” i love her lmao

i wouldnt choose to get married in riften if it was up to me but thats how it be in skyrim i guess

my babies are here!!!! what!!!!

and a. random guy i dont recognize lmao :’)

just wandered in to see what was going on i guess. or maybe we’re friends and i forgot who he is entirely which would be kind of sad :’ )

maybe it was my long lost father... slipped out before i ever had the chance to realize it

however i actually. ended up doing this scene twice because, fun fact, there’s a glitch where if you don’t manage to catch up to your spouse to talk about where to live before they leave the chapel they can just fucking Disappear sometimes, :’  ) i couldnt find her anywhere after the wedding and finally looked it up and apparently she just fell into the void so i had to reload and run it again. we’re double married now

planned better this time and dressed better but anyway that elf guy didn’t appear this time but some other guy did, who i ALSO cant quite identify, he looks. maybe. kind of like lucas valerian? who is actually a friend to me and was one of the first friends i made so it’d decently make sense for him to come to my wedding, but weird if he came and camilla didn’t, and im not even sure thats him anyway, so i dont know what happened here all around

muiri’s mentor lady came too though which was sweet

im spinning this kind of as... like, medea was so drawn to her and felt so strongly for her she couldn’t bring herself to disappoint her and this was an eye opener for them both as a kind of. “look what kind of people we’ve let ourselves become” and their marriage as a new beginning, love coming from a place of desperation and darkness, starting over and hoping that the divines will forgive what they’ve done

medea’s not leaving the brotherhood but i mmmmmight try to be a little more careful about who i kill

i had intended for her to come live with me in markarth, she’s in on my. assassin life so having kind of this Other Side to my life made sense but... she met my kids at the wedding i guess and she wanted to live with them... which is really cute,

it feels really weird having this huge fancy house all to myself (and uh. argis, i guess) in markarth and having my wife and kids (and lydia, and a fox) all squished into the honestly kinda run-down whiterun house though i think im gonna work on getting the solitude house for them bc its. safer there than in markarth i feel like and ive heard thats like the fanciest/biggest house

there she is..... my Wife

she also sells things now but i feel bad accepting it when she gives me “my share” of the profit like.... babe thats your money i have so much adventuring money and i didnt do shit to help earn that,

i buy things from her sometimes but i refuse to sell her stuff bc i dont want to take any more of her money :’ )

even tho it. doesnt really matter, its video games, i know, but

found lucia, the fox, and muiri all on the bed at once

lydia was just standing like this for a rly long time after muiri moved in i guess she was suspicious but chilled out eventually :’)

gettin along finally

i just realized if we move to solitude lydia’s gonna get left behind though :(

i mean ill still come visit her but. upsetting

my one issue is that muiri still keeps saying “thank you for solving my-....problem.” every time i come in speaking distance of her which is. weird given that its the same line she had before we were married, like, she apparently doesnt get any new things to say, and is Really repetitive (imagine living in a small space with your partner and they say the same sentence with the same intonation every time you step within like 2 feet of them. how long til that gets old, do you think, ) and also its just like??? girl let that go we gotta stop dwelling on this or the kids are gonna start questioning what apparently massively important problem mommy solved

idk why she was laying on the floor but anyway my kids have started calling her “mama” now too and im not crying or anything