#i just find it helpful to write something then post it
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how arcane characters would deal with mental disorders x fem reader
characters: viktor, jinx, vi, caitlyn, jayce, ekko, silco, mel and sevika.
writer's note: writing this felt like giving myself a warm hug, a comfort that i needed. if anyone reading this is going through or has gone through any of these disorders, i want to tell you that you are very brave because it is not an easy thing, so feel proud of yourself. i hope you liked this as much as i did. as i'm a psychology student, i felt very motivated and i hope that it was quite understandable and enjoyable. as you already know request are open ;)
P.S. i know the other option won in the poll on my profile, but i need more time to refine the ideas and make something high quality that everyone will love, which iâll be posting tomorrow ;)
Viktor Depression
The world around you feels like a constant weight, a heavy blanket that wraps around you, not letting you breathe. You wake up each day with a sense of emptiness in your chest, as if a black hole is absorbing all your energy, your motivation, your ability to feel anything other than sadness and apathy.
Itâs not that you donât want to get out of bed; itâs that the simple act of moving a finger feels like a titanic task. Fatigue is your constant companion, a shadow that never leaves you. Things that once filled you with joy now seem distant, irrelevant, as if they belonged to a life that is no longer yours.
The dark thoughts are your constant whispers, reminding you that youâre not enough, that itâs all pointless, that thereâs no way out. Sometimes, you cry without knowing why; other times, you want to cry, but even that you canât do. You feel trapped in an invisible prison, with no strength to fight your way out.
Viktor watches you from the doorway of your room, his gaze soft and full of concern. He knows the weight of shadows well, although his are different. Silently, he approaches and sits on the edge of the bed, not invading your space, but close enough for you to feel his presence.
âI have a new project Iâm working on,â he says in a quiet voice, trying not to break the fragile bubble of your world. âI thought maybe you could join me today. You donât have to do anything, just be there. Your company always helps me think.â
He doesnât pressure you. Viktor understands that words can be hard to find when your mind is clouded by depression. He knows that the solution isnât to force you to feel better, but to be with you, to offer you a hand, a small step forward.
He gently rises and offers his hand, not expecting you to take it, but hoping that youâll know heâs there, ready to support you when youâre ready. âThe world can wait,â he murmurs. âBut Iâm here, whenever you want to come back.â
His patience is infinite, his understanding deep. Viktor doesnât try to fix you, because he doesnât see you as broken. He knows that depression is a battle you fight every day, and heâs willing to walk alongside you, every small step, every shared silence.
You look at his hand, then his face; heâs concerned even though he tries to hide it. You make a huge effort to get out of bed, and even though your body doesnât cooperate at first, you manage. You take his hand and gently squeeze it; thatâs the most affection you can give him right now, youâre exhausted.
âLetâs go,â you murmur, your voice hoarse and broken; itâs the first time youâve spoken all day.
Youâre sitting next to Viktor in his small workshop, surrounded by pieces of metal and unfinished prototypes. Heâs explaining his latest invention, a spark of enthusiasm lighting up his eyes. You feel a little better, enough to enjoy his company, and for a moment, a laugh escapes your lips when you hear one of his stories.
âDid you really say that to Heimerdinger?â you laugh, your eyes shining with a spark of life. Itâs a small moment, but for Viktor, itâs like seeing the sun rise after a storm.
He smiles, pleased to have made you laugh. âYes, and his face... It was certainly indescribable,â he replies with a softness that reflects his pleasure at seeing you enjoy yourself, even if just for an instant.
But suddenly, without warning, the laughter turns into a lump in your throat. The spark of joy fades as quickly as it came, and you find yourself trapped in a wave of overwhelming sadness. The tears start rolling down your cheeks, and you canât stop them. The confusion in your eyes is evident, as if your body has betrayed the fleeting happiness you just felt.
Viktor notices immediately. He leans toward you, his expression turning serious, but his eyes remain warm and full of understanding. He doesnât ask questions, doesnât seek explanations that may be impossible to give. Instead, he moves a little closer, offering you his silent presence.
âItâs okay,â he says gently, his voice an anchor amidst your internal storm. âYou donât have to explain it. Just breathe.â
He offers you his hand, this time with more intent. You take it, feeling the warmth and firmness in his grip, a reminder that youâre not alone in this moment. You needed that contact. You needed to know that you could feel something other than sadness right now. Viktor doesnât pull away, doesnât feel uncomfortable. He knows that depression doesnât follow rules, that it can strike at any moment, and heâs willing to stay with you, no matter how long it lasts.
âDo you want us to stay here?â he asks, his tone delicate. âOr we can walk a little, if that helps.â
His willingness to adapt to your needs wraps you in a sense of safety. Even though the tears keep falling, Viktorâs presence is a balm, a reminder that, even in the darkest moments, thereâs someone who sees you, who understands you, and whoâs willing to stay by your side.
âJust... stay here with me,â you say, letting yourself fall against his body, exhausted.
He caught you and wrapped you with care, it was a hug with the right amount of strength.
âTake your time, darling. I wonât go anywhere,â Viktor promised in a whisper, never stopping the caresses on your back.
And that was enough to make you feel less miserable.
Jinx Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
The echo of the explosions still resonates in your mind, even though years have passed since that day when your world crumbled. The night everything you loved was consumed by flames in an attack on the Undercity. The night you lost your family and were left alone, with the screams and the smell of smoke forever etched in your memory.
As you walk beside Jinx through the bustling streets of Zaun, everything seems normal, almost calm, until an explosion in the distance makes your heart stop. Itâs a dry, loud sound, far too similar to the one you heard that night. Without warning, your breath becomes shallow, your lungs struggle to take in air, and an overwhelming sense of absolute panic takes hold of you.
Your body freezes, and it feels as if the world around you disappears. The crowd, the lights, even Jinxâall fade away, leaving you alone in that dark place where time doesnât move. The ground beneath your feet seems to give way, and you feel yourself falling again into that abyss of the past.
"Hey, hey!" Jinxâs voice cuts through the fog in your mind. Her hands grip your shoulders, and her gaze searches for yours with desperation. "Youâre not there, do you hear me? Youâre here, with me."
Her words feel distant, but the warmth of her hands somehow anchors you, reminding you that youâre not alone. "But... the sound..." you murmur, barely audible, as tears start to fall down your cheeks. "It was the same... the same as that night."
Jinx guides you to a quieter corner, away from the noise, holding your hand firmly. "Breathe, hon, like we always do," she says softly, her voice tinged with controlled urgency. "Fill up those lungs, okay? Like weâre balloons."
You try to follow her instructions, but every time you close your eyes to concentrate, the images of that night hit you with renewed force. "Itâs not working," you whisper, trembling. "Itâs always there. No matter how much I try, it doesnât go away. It doesnât go away!" You scream in panic, the fingers of your hands stiffening, making them immobile.
The worry in Jinxâs eyes softens a little, but thereâs something else there, something you can only describe as recognition. "That explosion... it reminded me of something too," she says after a moment, her voice quieter, almost a whisper. "Iâve been there, in that fucked-up place, where the ghosts never stop screaming."
Her words are like a key that opens the door to a deeper understanding.
She falls silent for a moment, gazing into the distance before refocusing her attention on you. "When I have my attacks, youâre always there for me, and I remember Iâm not alone. That helps me a lot," she admits, a small, almost sad smile curving her lips. "And youâre not alone either, hon. Weâre not broken, just a little bent. And here we are, bent together."
The hug she offers you is warm and firm, a tangible reminder that youâre not alone. You feel her strength, her determination, and something else: her own fear, her own struggle. "You donât have to fight alone," she whispers, her voice a promise. "If you ever feel like youâre going to fall, weâll fall together. And then, weâll rise. Always."
You cling to her like a lifeline, letting her warmth and her words anchor you to the present, if only for a moment. "Thank you, sweets," you whisper, allowing yourself, for the first time in a long time, to feel that itâs okay not to be okay.
Vi Anxiety Disorder
The night drags you into the abyss of your mind, but you find no respite. Instead of waking softly to the day, you're trapped in pure panic. Your chest burns, each breath a lost battle. Your heart gallops wildly, as if trying to escape your chest. You are drenched in sweat, the sheets sticking to your skin, becoming yet another prison.
Your eyes snap open, the darkness of the room seems to close in on you, and the silence is deafening. The sensation of suffocation consumes you. You try to gulp down air, but it's as though your lungs have forgotten how to function. Your hands search for something, anything, to anchor you to reality, but all they find is emptiness.
The door swings open abruptly, and Vi stands there, alert, her eyes filled with concern. She doesn't need to ask whatâs wrong; she knows instantly. She moves swiftly but carefully, approaching you without frightening you further.
"Breathe with me," she says gently, her hands finding yours, steady yet comforting. "Inhale through your nose... like this... and exhale through your mouth."
You try to follow her, but your body wonât cooperate. Your breath is shallow, frantic, as though every breath disintegrates before it even reaches your lungs. Tears begin to streak down your cheeks, mixing with the sweat.
"Vi... I canât... I can't... Iâm scared," you stammer, your words broken by sobs. Your mind is caught in a loop of terror, every thought spiraling downward, taking you further away from calm.
Vi sits beside you on the bed, her voice low and constant. "Donât be afraid. Listen to my voice. Iâm here with you, and I wonât let anything bad happen to you." Her tone is firm, anchoring you in the present, pulling you out of the tide of your own fear.
"But it hurts... my chest... I can't breathe..." Your body trembles, and your hands clutch desperately at her grasp. The feeling of control slipping away is overwhelming, leaving you feeling helpless.
Vi pulls you into an embrace, holding you close, offering her calm, her strength. "This is temporary. It wonât last forever," she whispers in your ear. "Trust me. Focus on me."
Slowly, very slowly, her voice cuts through the fog of your mind. You begin to breathe more deeply, following her rhythm, feeling how her presence stabilizes you, like a lighthouse in the storm. The pain in your chest begins to lessen, the pressure relents just a little, and your body starts to remember how to breathe without fighting.
Vi continues to speak, her voice a soft murmur, calming you with every word. "Youâre strong. You have control, even if it doesnât feel like it right now."
The tears still flow, but now they are tears of relief, not fear. "Donât leave... donât leave. I need you here," you whisper, your voice broken but sincere.
Vi strokes your hair, her other hand gently squeezing yours. "Iâm not going anywhere, little doe," she says affectionately, kissing your forehead, tasting the salty remnants of your sweat.
You remain in her arms a moment longer, allowing yourself to rest, letting her strength hold you as you regain your own. Gradually, the panic fades, leaving only exhaustion and the certainty that Vi will always be by your side, no matter how dark the nights may get.
Caitlyn Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
The silence in the apartment is deafening. The only sound that breaks the stillness is the relentless ticking of the wall clock, its rhythm echoing in your ears like a hammer. Youâre in the kitchen, eyes fixed on the glasses youâve meticulously arranged in the cupboard. Each glass must be perfectly spaced, each one aligned to the exact same level. Symmetry isnât just a preferenceâitâs a necessity. If something is out of place, you feel as though the whole world could collapse.
Your breathing is uneven, your chest rising and falling in quick succession. "One, two, three..." you murmur to yourself, counting each movement. Your hands tremble, but you canât stop. You canât stop. If you do, something terrible will happen. You donât know what, but the certainty that it will be catastrophic clings to you like a shadow.
Caitlyn enters the apartment after a long day at work. Her expression shifts instantly when she sees you in the kitchen, trapped in your own ritual. She stops in the doorway, watching you with a mix of concern and sadness. Itâs not the first time sheâs found you like this, but each time, it hurts her as though it were.
"Darling?" Her voice is soft, as if afraid to shatter you. She steps closer, carefully setting her hat down on the table. "What are you doing?"
You donât answer at first, your eyes still fixed on the glasses. "Almost done... just a few more minutes," you whisper, your voice trembling. You canât stop. Every glass moved, every small adjustment is a battle between reason and irrational fear.
Caitlyn stops beside you, her eyes scanning the scene, seeing the perfect pattern youâve created. "You donât have to do this," she says gently, yet firmly.
Your hands freeze for a moment, but the urge to continue is too strong. "You donât understand... if I donât do it right, if theyâre not perfectly aligned, something bad is going to happen." Tears begin to well up in your eyes, the pressure in your chest intensifying. "I donât want you to think Iâm crazy, but itâs like my mind... it canât stop."
Caitlyn takes a deep breath, her hand reaching out to touch your shoulder delicately. "Youâre not crazy," she says, locking eyes with you. "I know this is hard, that your mind doesnât give you peace. But you donât have to face it alone. Let me help you."
You turn to look at her, your eyes filled with desperation. "I canât stop, Cait. If I do, I feel like everything will fall apart. I canât control whatâs happening inside my head."
Caitlyn nods slowly, her gaze unwavering from yours. "I know, darling. And I know this wonât be fixed in a day. But Iâm here, and Iâm going to stay by your side. Weâll face it together."
Her words anchor you, a beacon in the storm that is your mind. Slowly, almost against your will, your hands begin to lower, moving away from the glasses. The fear is still there, a current running just beneath the surface, threatening to overwhelm you, but Caitlyn is beside you, her presence a reminder that youâre not alone.
"Breathe with me," she says, her voice soft and steady. "Inhale... exhale... together."
You follow her instructions, though your lungs seem to resist, full of anxiety. Caitlyn guides you, her hand never leaving your shoulder. "See? Weâre doing it! Youâre doing it!" She encourages, kissing your neck when she notices youâve looked away from the glasses for five seconds. It was only five seconds, but Caitlyn knew it was a huge accomplishment, and she celebrated it.
You let out a small sigh, the tension in your muscles easing slightly. Your hands travel to Caitlynâs waist, moving her so the glasses are no longer in your line of sight. You let your head fall against her chest, breathing in her scent. Itâs so much better, especially when you start counting the beats of her heart.
"How brave my wonderful and glorious girlfriend is. Iâm so proud of you," she whispered, her fingers weaving through your hair as she praised you.
"Cait, I love you so much. Youâre the best thing thatâs ever happened to me," you whisper against her warm chest, unwilling to leave that comforting refuge.
Caitlyn chuckles softly, and it feels like music to your ears.
"I feel the same way, darling," Caitlyn replied, gently swaying your bodies from side to side in a small rhythm.
You know that your compulsions wonât disappear, that the need for control will remain, but with Caitlyn, you feel like you can face it one day at a time.
Jayce Narcissistic Personality Disorder
The mirror in your room is your judge, jury, and executioner. Every imperfection is a sentence, every flaw a conviction. You spend hours in front of it, adjusting, retouching, trying to reach a perfection that always seems to slip through your fingers. Your heart beats fast, not from excitement, but from the constant fear that the world will see the cracks beneath your flawless facade.
Jayce enters quietly, his presence comforting and, at the same time, a threat. What will he think? Does he notice the imperfections you see? He steps closer, his gaze soft, but you feel the weight of his eyes as if he's scrutinizing every flaw.
"Love, it's late. Come to bed," he says in a calm voice, trying to distract you from your self-destructive spiral.
"Just one more moment," you reply without looking at him, your focus still on the mirror, searching for symmetry in your features, perfection in the unattainable.
Jayce sits on the edge of the bed, watching you. "You've been here for hours. You don't have to do this. You're beautiful just as you are."
His statement, though well-intentioned, feels like a white lie. "You donât understand, Jayce," you murmur, your voice trembling with suppressed frustration. "If Iâm not perfect, Iâm nobody. I canât let them see my flaws. I can't let⊠you see them."
Jayce stands, walking toward you carefully, as if approaching a flickering flame. "You donât have to be perfect to be loved," he says, his words a whisper in the storm raging in your mind. "You donât have to prove anything to anyone, least of all to me."
Your gaze finally meets his through the reflection. Tears fight their way out, but you can't allow such weakness. "It's not that simple," you whisper. "Every day, every look, every word, itâs all a test. And if I failâŠ"
Jayce places his hands on your shoulders, his eyes filled with compassion and infinite patience. "If you fail, Iâll be here to lift you up."
"And what if Iâm not enough?" The question slips out before you can stop it, the insecurity behind your narcissism showing in all its rawness. "What if one day you realize you deserve something better?"
Jayce leans in, his forehead touching yours, a gesture so intimate it almost breaks you. "I deserve someone who loves me for who I am, not for what I pretend to be. And thatâs exactly what you are to me. I donât have impossible expectations of you. I just want you to be happy, to find peace in who you are."
The internal struggle within you is fierce. The fear of rejection, the desire for perfection, the need to be seen and admired, all mix together in a whirlwind that consumes you. But in Jayce's arms, for a moment, the noise silences. His love is not a chain, but a refuge, one that offers rest if only you can let yourself fall into it.
"How can you be so sure?" you ask, your voice broken but curious.
"Because I love you," he answers without hesitation. "And love isnât about waiting for perfection. Itâs about accepting every part of you, even the ones you think are flaws."
The tears finally make their way out, releasing something within you that has been held back for so long. Jayce holds you as you cry, whispering words of comfort, letting all the pressure, fear, and anguish flow out of you.
"Youâre perfect," you whisper, your voice cracked but full of sincerity. In your mind, Jayce is the epitome of everything you donât believe you are: strong, confident, unshakable.
Jayce smiles softly, his hand caressing your cheek, wiping away the tears still falling. "No, Iâm just a man in love. A man who loves you madly." His voice is warm, filled with a tenderness that disarms you. "Why donât you show me that precious smile of yours? Please, it would make me so happy."
His sweet words touch your heart, and the corners of your lips stretch on their own, forming a sad smile.
"Gorgeous," Jayce murmured, caressing your lips with his strong, calloused fingers.
"Flatterer," you reply with a more elaborate smile, your eyes still wet, but now with a different shine, one that reflects the spark of hope heâs ignited in you.
"Iâm just stating facts. Iâm a scientist, honey, so I can tell you that, from my perspective, itâs scientifically proven that youâre gorgeous," he commented wryly, a wit that made you laugh.
Jayce smiled and kissed your forehead, holding you firmly in his arms. Finally, you feel like you can breathe, like air is filling your lungs again without that constant weight on your chest.
Ekko Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)
The room is silent except for the soft hum of music playing in the background, but your mind cannot stop racing. Your thoughts scatter like arrows shot in every direction. You try to focus on something, anything, but it feels as though your brain is in a constant battle between the ideas that come and go. The light from the lamp flickers irregularly, and for a moment, you wonder if the bulb is about to explode. This makes no sense, you know that, but the unease lingers.
You quickly get up from the bed, taking a misstep, tripping over a chair you hadnât seen, barely avoiding it. Your heart races. Everything is a series of chaotic jumps in your head, an endless torrent of thoughts that canât follow a single path. You look at the desk, with papers scattered aboutâunfinished projects, ideas you canât ground. Everything calls to you, but you canât focus on anything.
Your hands tremble slightly as you grab the pen and begin to write down an idea that came to you, but before you finish the sentence, a new image flashes in your mind. You stop, leaving the pen on the desk and staring out the window. Something about the glow of the stars makes you think of something else. You canât concentrate. Everything distracts you, even the small noises you used to never notice. Itâs so annoying.
Suddenly, you feel the stress begin to accumulate in your shoulders. Itâs not just the lack of concentration; itâs the sense of constantly running toward something without ever arriving. You try to finish a task, but more and more thoughts pile up, projects, things that need doing. Everything seems urgent, and nothing seems possible to complete. Anxiety settles in your chest.
Youâre about to get up again when you hear the sound of the door opening behind you. Ekko enters the room, his calming presence is the only thing that makes you stop for a moment. He watches you in silence for a few seconds, noticing the frenzy of your movements. You hadnât realized, but your breathing is irregular, and youâve gotten up twice without purpose. Something isnât right.
He watches you quietly, understanding the internal struggle youâre facing. He knows what this means, what it costs you every day.
âWhatâs going on? Why are you so worked up?â he asks, his voice soft but with enough authority to make you stop and listen.
Your eyes focus on a fixed point, but you canât find the words to explain what youâre feeling. You donât know how to put into words whatâs happening. Itâs like youâre trapped in a cycle of thoughts that never stop.
âMy mind... it doesnât stop moving,â you finally manage to say, almost in a whisper. âEvery time I try to do something, itâs like something else distracts me. Nothing stays. Everything slips away.â
Ekko watches you silently for a moment, understanding the fight youâre facing. He knows exactly what this feels like.
âI get it, babe,â he responds, his tone firm but gentle. âI know your mindâs all over the place right now, but I promise we can do this one step at a time. Weâll focus on one thing at a time, no pressure. Sound good?â
The fact that Ekko is offering to be there, without judgment, brings you relief. You know that the impulsiveness you feel, the urge to move without a plan, is something that consumes you. Your mind jumps from one thought to another, and each of those thoughts feels like an urgent need, an immediate necessity. But at the same time, nothing makes sense. Everything is scattered and out of control.
âItâs just that...â your words fade into the air, unable to be completed. You feel trapped in your own body, in your own brain. You canât stop, but you canât move forward either.
Ekko gently places a hand on your shoulder, his touch calming. âHow can we start?â he asks sincerely, not rushing you. âTell me what you need.â
For a moment, everything seems to stop. The flood of thoughts quiets down, and for the first time in a long while, you can think clearly, even if itâs just for an instant. Itâs not about having everything figured out right away; itâs about feeling that someone is there, willing to stand by you while you navigate through the mental whirlwind.
âI just... I donât know how to do it without jumping from one thing to another,â you murmur, frustration and shame creeping into your voice. âI feel like everythingâs overwhelming, and I canât focus on anything.â
âWeâll take it slow,â Ekko replies, his tone calm and direct. âFirst, breathe. The first step is to breathe, and then we can start with just one thing. The rest can wait.â
You close your eyes for a moment and follow his words. You breathe deeply, slowly, trying to find the balance that always seems so hard to reach. Ekko is there, not rushing you, waiting for your mind to settle. With his help, little by little, you manage to focus on one small task, one thatâs manageable enough not to overwhelm you. Itâs just one step, but itâs a step toward calm.
âYou donât have to do it all right now,â Ekko says softly. âWhat matters is that youâre not alone in this. Weâll go step by step.â
You feel the knot in your stomach loosening, even though thereâs still much to do. But at this moment, with him by your side, you realize that maybe, just maybe, you can find a way toward a little peace.
After hours of work and soft laughter, youâre sitting on the floor, with Ekko beside you, both looking at the pieces left to place in a puzzle. Itâs almost complete, the pieces fitting perfectly, and though the hours have flown by, you feel lighter, the atmosphere quieter.
âOne more,â Ekko says with a smile, holding up a piece in the air. He passes it to you, and together, you place it in its spot, completing the picture. The puzzle is done, and though itâs a small accomplishment, it feels more meaningful than it seems. Not just because of what youâve completed, but because youâve managed to feel centered, accompanied.
When you look at the drawing you had left unfinished, now finally complete, you feel a deep sense of satisfaction. Ekko helped bring to life the image that only existed in your mind, his hands working alongside yours, following every line with care.
âYou did it,â Ekko says, his eyes shining with pride. âMy girl is incredible.â He pulled you into his lap and kissed your forehead.
You look at him, your heart beating a little faster. The fatigue of the afternoon washes over you, but you donât care. All that matters is that heâs here, by your side, and that, for once, you feel at peace. The air feels lighter, as if the space between you two has been reduced, softened by the stillness of the moment.
âThank you,â you murmur, your words barely a whisper, but full of gratitude.
Ekko turns toward you, his expression softening. âDonât thank me. Thank yourself. Youâre the one who made it happen, not me.â
The way he looks at you, the way his presence has become part of your space, makes you smile. And, in a moment of impulse, without thinking too much about it, you move a little closer. He seems to understand it instantly, and before you can second-guess yourself, his lips brush against yours. Itâs a soft kiss, no rush, no urgency, just a moment where words arenât needed.
When you pull away, both of you stay there, looking at each other, the air between you charged with something that doesnât need to be named. Ekko smiles, his eyes sparkling with that glint that makes you feel as though everything is right, as if the world, for a moment, is in its place.
âEverythingâs okay now,â Ekko says softly, filling you with calm.
And in that instant, you believe him.
Silco Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
The air in Silco's office is thick with tension, as always. The sound of the bustling city echoes through the glass windows, but inside, everything is still, almost as rigid as the gaze Silco fixes on you. You're sitting across from him, feeling a familiar dizziness, as if everything is out of control and, at the same time, you're trapped in an empty space. A mix of confusion and anxiety courses through every fiber of your being.
Your hands tremble slightly, and although you try to control your breathing, each inhalation seems to sink you further into the internal chaos. The voices in your head blend together, demanding answers, claiming something you can't give. Silco watches you calmly, but it's a cold, calculated calm, as if everything that's going on inside you is a game he knows how to play.
You feel the emptiness consuming you, and yet an unbearable pressure weighs on your chest. Your mind betrays you, throwing destructive thoughts at you, telling you you're worthless, that everything you do is doomed to fail. The contradiction is overwhelming: on one hand, you feel lost, and on the other, you refuse to give in to the feeling of helplessness.
"Are you alright?" Silco asks, his voice low and steady, but there's a slight intensity in his tone. He doesn't break eye contact, as if he's evaluating every micro-expression on your face, every movement. He knows you're not, but still, he asks. Is it a test? A need to know how far you can go? The silence stretches on, and your thoughts only intensify.
The urge to stand up and run from it all is strong. Everything in you screams to follow your impulses, to escape, to flee from the overwhelming weight of it all. But you stay there, because something in you knows that running will only plunge you deeper into the darkness you're feeling inside. You see yourself fighting, trying to maintain control, but every second makes you feel more lost.
"I'm sorry... I don't know what's happening to me," you whisper, your voice broken, struggling against the avalanche of emotions threatening to drown you. You feel the tears pressing behind your eyes, but you force yourself to keep composure. "It's just... it's all so intense. So confusing."
Silco keeps watching you in silence. There's no judgment in his gaze, only a calculated assessment, as if he's reading between the lines of your suffering. After a long moment, he sighs and stands up from his chair, approaching you slowly. It's not a sudden gesture, but calm, as if he's used to dealing with people who struggle with their own minds. He says nothing, but his presence is the only thing anchoring you in this moment.
With one hand, he takes yours. The contact is firm, but not aggressive, as if he's giving you space to breathe, but also space to not escape. In his eyes, something changes. There's an understanding that you can't fully decipher, but it fills you with a strange sensation, like, for the first time in a long time, you're not alone in the storm raging inside you.
"Your mind is betraying you," Silco says calmly, his voice soft but full of an authority that makes you feel that everything happening has a purpose. "It's an enemy that everyone must face at some point. But you don't have to face it alone."
The words fall on you like a stone, but strangely, they allow you to relax, even if only for a moment. The internal chaos you've always felt halts for an instant. And in that silence, you're finally able to breathe.
"All of this... this emptiness, the feeling that nothing matters, it's not your fault," Silco continues, his tone firm, though not without a strange gentleness. "It's just a phase, a moment that will pass. But you need to control it. Not let it take over you."
You feel vulnerable, but at the same time, a part of you relaxes in his closeness. Silco doesn't tell you that it's okay, nor does he promise easy solutions. He speaks to you with reality, with that harshness that you know comes from someone who understands suffering, but who doesn't have time to sugarcoat the truth.
"What you're feeling is real, but it's also transient. Not everything is as final as you think," he adds, his gaze fixed on yours with intensity. "You can be stronger than this."
The words resonate in your mind as you take a deep breath. You don't know if you fully believe them, but for some reason, in this moment, the darkness feels less imposing. You're not completely free of it, but at least you feel you're not entirely alone. Silco is here, firm and without judgment, waiting for you to take control of your own mind, without expecting you to do it immediately, but giving you the possibility to believe that you'll manage.
The pressure in your chest doesn't disappear completely, but a small crack of calm starts to open within you. And though you know your inner struggles won't end immediately, for the first time in a long while, you don't feel as lost. Silco looks at you one last time, without haste, but with a silent certainty.
"When you're ready, you can get out of this. I'll be here."
You're surprised by how firm his voice sounds, as if, by saying it, he's committed to being a constant presence. And although you don't fully understand how he does it, you realize that, in this moment, his steadiness helps you more than any empty words of comfort.
The world continues around you, but somehow, Silco has given you the strength to face it.
The silence between you and Silco lingers for a moment, but it's no longer the same silence as before. There's a strange peace, almost comforting, in the way he holds you, in the closeness you now feel between you both. The contact of his hand, firm and steady, gives you an anchor amidst the storm that still rages inside you.
A sigh escapes your lips without you noticing, and for a moment, it's not one of despair, but of relief. Silco, still keeping his gaze fixed on you, takes one more step closer. It's not a quick or rushed step, but a calculated one, as if he's sure that, in this moment, the only thing you need is that closeness, that calm presence.
Without saying anything, his fingers gently caress your cheek, a soft gesture that cuts through you. There's a tenderness in his movements that you hadn't anticipated, something that seems in complete contradiction with the person you know, but that, in this moment, comforts you more than any words. You feel vulnerable, but you don't fear it, not now.
Your breathing gradually calms, and Silco, silently, moves a little closer, so close that you can feel the warmth of his body. The space between you is almost nonexistent now, and you can feel his breath in rhythm with yours. There's something in his presence that soothes you, that gives you the feeling that everything will be okay, even though it still feels hard to believe.
Finally, his lips come close to yours with an unexpected softness. It's not a hasty or desperate kiss, but something slower, more measured. The brush of his lips against yours is so gentle that it surprises you, as if he's waiting for you to accept it, for you to be ready. And you are. Though your mind is still filled with doubts and fears, something inside you tells you that this is the moment you can allow yourself to be vulnerable, that you can receive something that won't hurt you.
The kiss deepens slowly, and in that instant, the world seems to fade away around you. All that remains is the warmth of his body, the firmness of his arms around you, and the gentle contact of his lips, like a silent promise that, even though the future is uncertain, for a moment, everything is alright.
When you finally pull away, no words are needed. Silco looks at you with an intensity you've never seen before, but in his eyes, there's something more, something you can't describe, something that makes you feel that, despite everything you've been through, you're not alone.
"I told you you were strong," he whispers, his voice deep and soft at the same time.
And for a moment, everything seems enough.
Mel Chronic Stress Disorder
The atmosphere is thick with tension, but it's a different kind of tension. It's a quiet calm, yet at the same time, it is filled with the constant threat of what could happen. Youâre there, in one of the rooms of the mansion, sitting on a chair by the window, gazing out at the illuminated city, but unable to really see anything. The world around you seems to blur, as if a layer of fog has settled over your senses, blurring every detail and leaving only the emptiness of your thoughts.
Mel, who has been watching your behavior for the past few minutes, approaches with a palpable gentleness in her movements. Her presence is firm, but not intrusive. From a distance, sheâs observed how the symptoms of your chronic stress have taken over you, how anxiety and mental exhaustion have combined to make you feel beyond your limits.
She crouches slightly to be at your level, her eyes fixed on yours, searching for your attention. âI notice youâre not yourself, and I know itâs because the weight of everything has piled up,â she says in a low voice, her tone soft yet firm. âBut I want you to listen. You have the right to rest. You donât have to carry the world, not all the time.â
Despite her words, you feel a pressure in your chest that wonât ease. Everything feels too big, too heavy. Chronic stress consumes you, leaving your thoughts tangled while your body responds with a deep exhaustion that doesnât seem to go away no matter what you do.
Mel, noticing the internal struggle that consumes you, steps closer and, without warning, places a firm hand on your shoulder. Itâs not a gesture of force, but of support. A sign that sheâs here, silently, but available to help you find the balance you need.
âYour body is telling you it needs to stop,â she continues, with a softness thatâs hard to deny. âThose moments of despair, of exhaustion... theyâre real. But you donât have to go through it alone, no matter how much you think you can.â
The contact of her hand on you, her quiet strength, begins to offer some relief. Even though the weight still lingers, something in you relaxes. Itâs as if her words offer you a rope to hold onto, something tangible in the fog that seems to surround your mind.
You lean forward, your fingers briefly touching your forehead as you try to calm the agitation still coursing through you. The stress, that constant pressure in your life, seems unwilling to let go of you, but at least in this moment, with Mel by your side, you can breathe a little more deeply.
âIâll be here,â Mel whispers, like an unbreakable promise. âIf you need to rest, Iâll help you find peace. You donât have to go on alone.â
For the first time in a long time, you allow yourself to think that, maybe, itâs possible to let go of some of that burden. Melâs voice, soft yet full of certainty, is a refuge in the midst of the chaos in your mind.
Mel doesnât expect you to feel guilty for your exhaustion. She doesnât demand that you change or âovercomeâ your chronic stress overnight. She only gives you space to feel what you need to feel and to acknowledge that, even though the road may be long, you donât have to walk it alone.
When your eyes lift and meet hers, thereâs something in your gaze that softens. The stress doesnât vanish immediately, but the simple fact that someone understands you, that someone is staying with you without judging, gives you something you didnât have before: the possibility of healing.
The silence between you both is comfortable. Itâs a silence of acceptance and understanding. And as Mel remains by your side, her presence becomes something that offers comfort, not an immediate solution, but a step toward the calm you so desperately need.
After a long silence, Mel slowly approaches you, and her eyes, filled with softness and understanding, capture you. She takes your hand, with a delicacy that makes you feel lighter, as if the weight of your mind could lessen just with that contact.
âYou know, right?â she whispers, her voice gentle but firm. âIâve seen you fight, and still, youâre here, being so incredible. And to me, thatâs what really matters. Not everything youâve been through, but who you are now.â
The sparkle in her eyes makes you blush slightly, and your heart beats a little faster.
âMel...â you whisper, barely able to find the words, feeling your nerves breaking. âI donât know what Iâd do without youâŠâ
She smiles, moving closer. âIâm here, for whatever you need, for anything, always.â
Without saying another word, Mel gently caresses your cheek, as if every movement is a silent promise. Then, you see her lean in toward you, her face so close to yours that you can feel the brush of her breath.
âYouâre my refuge, you know that, right?â Mel says, with sincerity that runs deep within you.
And without another word, her lips find yours, in a tender, almost urgent kiss, as if she wanted to convey everything she couldnât with words. When she pulls away, her eyes shine with an unmistakable softness.
âI love you, with all my being. And that wonât change.â
You shiver slightly at her words, but instead of insecurity, you find comfort. Her eyes transmit calm to you, and for the first time, you realize that sheâs willing to be the peace you so need.
Sevika Bipolar Disorder
The darkness surrounds you, but itâs not physical darkness; itâs something denser, creeping through every corner of your mind. Itâs one of those days. You donât know for sure, but you feel it deep in your gut: something has changed. Thereâs a void in your chest that you donât know how to fill, and a sensation in your stomach that twists you up. Youâve been through this before. The bipolar disorder drags you, takes you as its own without warning, pushing you from one extreme to the other in a matter of hours, minutes.
You wake up feeling the weight of sadness, a sadness that feels physical, sinking you into the mattress as if the sheets were lead. You donât want to move, think, or do anything. You just feel empty, as if all your strength has evaporated. The room seems smaller, the walls pressing in on you. Your legs donât respond when you try to get up. A knot forms in your throat, but the tears wonât come. Thereâs no energy for that, just the weight of despair.
You donât see her enter. Her presence is silent, but solid. Sevika knows something is wrong, she feels it even before you tell her. When you look at her, her expression doesnât change, but thereâs something in her eyes that makes you feel that the situation is serious. Thereâs no surprise, no fear, just a cold, calculating understanding. Sevika isnât one to lose her calm easily. And that makes you even more confused, making you feel like you donât belong in that moment, like youâre not the person she expects to see.
âWhatâs going on?â she asks, not softening anything. The question isnât condescending, nor filled with concern. Itâs direct, almost harsh, she doesnât beat around the bush. She knows that, when youâre like this, empty words donât help.
You struggle to form a response. You canât, really. Your thoughts are tangled in an incomprehensible chaos. But she doesnât expect you to explain anything. Sevika approaches, sits on the edge of the bed. Her gaze never leaves you, as if sheâs evaluating your soul, searching for a point of vulnerability, a sign of what to do next. She has the ability to see beyond your emotions, beyond the depression that consumes you and the anxiety that makes you tremble. She knows that right now thereâs nothing rational in your mind, but understanding is her only response. Patience mixes with a slight touch of toughness, as she always does with things she canât control.
âYouâre staying here. Youâre not going to do anything impulsive. Youâre not going to try to run out of here or make this worse,â she says with a calm coldness that leaves no room for objection. You know that, in this moment, sheâs the only voice of reason you can hear.
Youâre aware that Sevika is used to dealing with extreme situations, but this one is different. She watches you closely, but from a distance, as if sheâs weighing the damage, calculating what she can do to keep you safe. You donât see fear in her, but you see resolve. She doesnât switch into ârescuer mode,â she doesnât try to hug you or tell you that everything will be fine. What she says, she says with authority because she knows that if she gives in, chaos will take control, and everything sheâs worked to keep stable will fall apart.
In the internal struggle between your broken mind and the anger that begins to build up inside of you, Sevika is the rock that keeps you from diving into the void. But she also knows she canât ignore your emotions. Her expression hardens slightly when she realizes thereâs something more going on. âIâm telling you this because you know it, not because I need to explain it to you,â she whispers, making it clear that thereâs no room for games.
When you finally speak, itâs in whispers, as if your words have weight and could break you. âI donât know whatâs happening to me. Iâm... Iâm so tired of this constant back and forth. I canât handle it.â
Sevika doesnât change her posture. She doesnât tell you that sheâs going to âfixâ you, nor does she try to cure you. She knows that what you have doesnât have an easy fix, but she does have tools to deal with the situation. âYou donât need to fix anything right now. You need to rest. Let whatâs going to happen, happen, but donât make decisions youâll regret later. Do you understand me?â her voice is firm, but underneath thereâs something else, a touch of softness she rarely shows.
The air in the room is heavy, laden with the weight of your thoughts, like a fog that prevents you from seeing beyond. Sevika is there, watching you with the same intensity as always, but with an odd calm, a calm that scares you because it makes you feel like she sees it all: the chaos consuming you, the internal battle between despair and rage.
âI donât want this to control me. I donât want to be like this,â you murmur, the words coming out broken. You know youâre saying it more to yourself than to her, but still, the guilt pierces your chest like invisible needles. You feel like youâre not being who she expects.
Sevika stays silent for a moment, her gaze fixed on you. Thereâs something in her face, a line of tension in her jaw, as if sheâs weighing every word before speaking. Finally, she gets a little closer, breaking the distance between your bodies.
âItâs not about what you expect from yourself. Itâs about what you need right now. And what you need right now is rest, stop fighting against something you canât control.â
Your eyes search hers, those eyes that always seem to understand more than you can verbalize. And, somehow, you feel that thereâs no judgment in them, just a silent acceptance of what youâre going through. Itâs strange. In the middle of the storm in your mind, Sevika gives you the feeling of being the only anchor left in your world.
Suddenly, she stretches out a hand toward you, not rushing, not in a hurry, but with the firmness that characterizes her. You take it without thinking, as if itâs the only thing that can stop the flood of erratic thoughts flooding your mind. Her touch is warm, comforting. Thereâs a strength in that simple gesture, something that allows you to relax, even if just for a second.
âIâm going to take care of you, understand?â she whispers, her voice low, barely a breath. There are no empty promises in her words, just a statement of fact. But in her tone, you find a softness that she rarely shows. Itâs like, for a brief moment, her heart opens a little more, even if she doesnât fully recognize it.
The moment stretches on, and even though the storm in your mind hasnât ceased, thereâs something in you that feels a little lighter. Sevika doesnât have the solution to your pain, but her presence, her closeness, gives you a peace you never even imagined.
Without thinking, you move a little closer to her, seeking that warmth. Her fingers interlace with yours, and for the first time all day, you donât feel completely broken. Sevika has never promised you a happy ending, but in this moment, you donât need one. The simple fact of being here, of having her close, gives you a reason to keep going, even if just for a little while longer.
âI love you,â you say without thinking, and the words come out with a clarity that surprises you. Itâs not a grand declaration, itâs not a promise that everything will be okay, but itâs something real, something you never thought you could say to anyone before.
âI love you too, doll,â she responds with a half-smile, though her eyes seem softer than ever. And, for a second, the world seems to stop. The anxiety, the disorder in your head, dissipate, if only for a brief moment.
She leans in a little toward you, and in that instant, all that matters is the touch of her lips on your forehead, a simple gesture but filled with affection. The silence between you both is comfortable, no pressure, just the comfort of being together, knowing that, even if the world around you falls apart, Sevika will be the one to keep you steady.
#arcane x reader#arcane fanfic#arcane imagine#arcane x female reader#arcane#arcane fluff#arcane x you#ekko arcane#jinx arcane#jinx x reader#ekko x reader#viktor x y/n#viktor x you#viktor x reader#viktor arcane#vi x reader#vi x you#arcane vi#arcane caitlyn#caitlyn x reader#arcane jayce#jayce x reader#arcane silco#silco x reader#mel x reader#mel arcane#sevika x reader#sevika arcane#sevika x you#vi x y/n
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Note: this is me just making a wonderland post about the canonical character in twisted wonderland based on translations, vignettes and manga. everyone has differing opinions and interpretations and I'm not gonna bicker about someone's version of Trey in their writing or their au.
I feel like some folks in twst fandom are realizing that canonical Trey isn't really like early/previous fandom Trey, who was characterized as a sweet completely normal bakerman who's also the heartslabyul mom, but instead of just going "oh yeah no, Trey can be petty and mischievous sometimes. usually in situations where there are others also being petty and mischievous while still keeping on top of his duties and engaging in his hobbies" some of the fandom seems to have swung to the other side of the spectrum and are like "oh? so trey has been living a lie this entire time! He actually HATES baking and he's got a âšsecret agendaâš and he probably is a mastermind and is part of a heartslabyul shadow government!!!!"
And while i know that there's a good chance many are just being silly and making memes and jokes, i have seen the way fandom genuinely boils down characters and strips them of all nuance. Notable with the leech twins, sebek and rook who are all canonically dorks and goobers with their passions and interests in both the games and mangas. They're all intense but most are just awkward and passionate/invested in their interests. Like Sebek being boiled down to shouty malleus fanatic and ignore his various interests and hobbies. he can and will question Malleus notable in the recent chapters and also times when Malleus acts in a way that makes Sebek confused<- mainly in manga and vignettes. Like Floyd being boiled down to unhinged and unpredictable, when most of his actions and activities happen because he got bored of something being monotonous or tiring or repetitive and goes to look for something more interesting like drama or someone with strong reactions to mess with. Guy just gets bored and goes to look for something interesting. Or Rook who gets extremely invested in whatever is his current interest/passion to the point of ignoring everything else. Jade also does this. They're all goobers tbh. Just guys, just folks.
Trey Clover is also just a guy. He is just conflict avoidant tbh. Trey just wants to keep the peace, to make sure people aren't fighting, people are following the rules and aren't making messes. Like that's something he mentions often and that many of his actions reflect from how he checks in on all the students and makes sure they're following heartslabyul rules but doesn't tell Riddle about any rule breaks so as to keep peace, to holding back in activities so he doesn't draw attention and not mentioning stuff he might know specifically so that he doesn't get asked about it (notably when Jamil wants to read ancient texts and trey only reads it upon finding out it contained an ancient tooth paste recipe). He seeks convenience, peace and calm. He's not exactly a schemer, out to get something specific or complete some goal in life like those such as Jamil, Leona or Azul. He's also not necessarily someone solely attempting to coast by and only seek stimulus/fun like with Kalim and Cater.
He's not secretly cruel and not the secret mastermind behind heartslabyul. Yes, He's mischievous and sometimes petty. Notably he gets this way when other petty and mischievous people are around him and it's usually in response to those that were acting like that (messing with ace, messing with Jade, etc). He does care and he does look out for his dormmates and peers. Honestly if he truly didn't care about Riddle or Ace and Deuce then he really wouldn't have helped them, plus he doesn't necessarily go out of his way to help every person anyways. If he truly didn't care then he could've abandoned Riddle when he was at his lowest like the rest of the dorm, or even just let Ace and Deuce carry out their punishment instead of helping them bake tarts and pies to try to help out with Riddle's anger.
As for if he likes baking? Imma be real, that guy can't not like baking. If he hated baking then he's a masochist (joking) because fucker is baking everyday with a smile and trying get everyone to eat his baking and constantly sharing all the goodies he's made (genuine). He's baking constantly in both the game and in manga. There are so many instances where he bakes experimentally, he bakes recreationally or bakes for his dorm. There're so many instances where he just carries cupcakes and scones and cookies everywhere. He bakes some to share with his Science club members, shares some type of goody with every iteration of the Yuu's (mangas and game). He goes out of his way to buy new recipe books with his own money to bake more things. In one vignette he bought an entire recipe book specifically so he can learn to bake this one (1) type of dessert he saw once because he liked the way the dessert looked so much that he wanted to make it and went and BOUGHT AN ENTIRE NEW RECIPE BOOK just to make that one dessert. That guy likes to bake. Yeah sure, he says "i don't bake with love đ" but that doesn't mean anything in the context of NRC which is "emotionally repressed anti-feelings" central where nearly everyone can't be genuine and blunt with their feelings and emotions (even the more blunt and jovial characters have some deep sadness or deep trauma stuff that gets hinted at several times like with Cater, Kalim, Silver and Sebek). Folks in NRC are emotionally repressed and hate admitting connection with each other. Seriously, check out Yuurei20's post on how often the term "friend" is used in the original Japanese, there's very few canonical mentions of them calling each other friend EXCEPT WHEN ENGLISH TRANSLATION ADDED IT otherwise they don't normally actually acknowledge their connections and some never actually say friend at all. They'll call each other classmates or something but in JP they don't really like to acknowledge closeness.
Trey clearly likes to bake and invests a significant amount of time into it beyond just occasional cooking duty and he also shares his goods with practically everyone. Yeah sure he's from a family of bakers and I've seen some people say that "oh but he's just baking because of his family job" but it's not like they urgently need their son, who's in class and currently at the magic boarding school, to bake everyday for their baking needs and i guarantee that he doesn't need to go out of his way to get experimental with his baking and wouldn't bake that often if it's just cause of family business or practice. Plus if it's just that then why would he go out of his way to buy recipe books just cause he saw a single dessert that inspired him. He's not just baking for family business reasons. Trey likes to bake.
Honestly, I'm not surprised he says that he doesn't bake with love especially in a place like NRC. As mentioned earlier, everyone gets so weird and pressed about connection and also makes fun of each other for expressing care. Some even get anxious about another's intentions if given unasked for help (notable when Kalim helped Azul get his hat in the manga and Azul stresses about trying to repay this favor). Also baking is just a hobby, similar to crafting, drawing or writing and sometimes people just take satisfaction and joy in simply doing those things. When someone makes something, they don't always have to put in heartfelt feelings in it per se. When someone draws, sometimes it's cathartic or you just felt inspired and just wanted to draw. Sometimes it is specifically to destress or to get out feelings. Sometimes drawing is just because you can do it so you did. Similarly, baking can just be because you wanted to and you like baking. Plus it makes sense Trey wasn't like "i put all my love and feelings in my baking<3" because in the context of that line he seemed to be referencing baking for his peers and strangers. He's baking for people in his school or for events. So Honestly yeah??? Of course Trey wouldn't say he puts love in his baking. He's baking for his friends, for his club and for dorm stuff and also bakes experimental recipes. He isn't stirring that bowl of batter and going "now to put in all of my love and dedication <3" during those times because it would be kinda odd for most of those scenarios tbh. For experimental recipes, you're low-key kinda just fucking around and taking notes to see what works and i imagine trey would be doing the same and wouldn't be emotional over his bowl of batter during this time. For his club and dorm stuff, Trey isn't super close with EVERYONE in there and he's just trying to make sure there's enough so again fitting that he's not going "made with love". If he's making treats for his friends then he certainly tends to put in more effort, usually in regards to taste and diet (notable with vil and Cater as he tends to make things that they will actually like) and seems to like compliments on his cooking especially from those he's closer to. While he does put in that extra care which implies closer bonds, i do think most of the nrc boys would still be put off if trey was like "for you, made with love <3" (i think Ace would make fun of him so hard and even cater would be thrown for a loop). I will also note that in several vignettes as well as in several scenes in the manga, he gets genuinely put out if someone doesn't want to eat his cooking (notably in the manga if people were too busy to eat though this also happens in game) and in a few vignettes he even tries to adjust what he makes and what he pairs it with specifically so they will eat more of what he makes (notably with Vil and trying to make light desserts and pastries as well as pairing it with certain preferred teas) which to me shows he does put care and thoughtfulness into his baking even if he doesn't say it outright.
Long story short: Trey is not uncaring (he looks out for his dormmates and friends even baking treats specifically for their taste when he can), he likes baking (he wouldn't be so invested in trying new recipes, looking for inspiration or going out of his way to experiment with his baking if he wasn't), he's not really scheming so much as he's trying to keep the peace and avoid conflict to the point of either keeping quiet, thwarting shenanigans (notably with ace and deuce), or hiding his abilities (he's not like Azul, jamil or Leona who are aiming for top spot and in fact trey dislikes added fuss and dislikes the spotlight), and he's mischievous and petty at times though notably with those that are also mischievous or petty (he will mess with his younger dorm members though will try to stop them from actually messing up like with the oyster sauce joke for the chestnut tarts, and sometimes messes with others)
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland ideas#trey cover#twisted wonderland analysis#<- i guess#fiden rants
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a/n: i donât actually like this but i planned to post it when i was writing it so yeah:) also i wrote this because most if not all of my inbox is smut requests (iâm not complaining) and i felt like writing some fluff
my heart was hurting. everything was hurting and i didnât know why. i closed my eyes and tried to distract myself. i played music. i watched something. no matter what i did, my mind wandered back to one thing. her voice.
i tried watching videos to hear her voice but it was no use. i needed to call her. i knew i shouldnât though. she was out with friends. i needed to give her space. i tried so hard to keep myself distracted. i really did try. i couldnât though.
my mind began to wander off. back to the one thing i was trying to avoid. i couldnât. iâd been doing so well. i had the strongest urge. but i knew i just needed to keep myself busy for a little longer. just until billie was home.
i managed to keep myself occupied for all of 10 minutes before i couldnât anymore. it was either hurting myself, or call billie. and i know what sheâd rather me do. and i know what i wouldnât regret later. i picked up my phone, finding billies contact before deciding whether to facetime her or just call her.
i ended up calling her, i didnât want her or her friends to see how i looked. i wasnât sure if sheâd answer. sheâd answer if she were to see my call, i know that, but i was worried she wouldnât see it since she was a little busy.
as soon as i heard the ringing, my heart dropped. what if i ruined her day? what if she got mad? i tried to push those thoughts aside as i heard billies voice down the phone after a few rings.
âhey baby! everything okay?â
i stayed silent for a second. i didnât want her to be mad at me.
âwhatâs going on love? talk to me.â her tone softened slightly.
âi.. iâm having a difficult day.â i sighed.
small tears rolled down my cheeks as i sniffled, trying to keep myself calm.
âtell me about your day, iâll try to make it better baby.â i heard her move, probably to somewhere more private where we could talk.
âi just.. i donât know iâve just been stressed and i feel anxious. i needed to hear your voice to distract me a bit.â
she comforted me for a little bit and made sure iâd calmed down. she ended up making me laugh and making my mood so much better.
âiâm proud of you for calling me. iâll be home soon okay?â
âokay billie i love you. thank you.â
âi love you, see you soon pretty girl.â she blew some kisses down the phone, and i did too before ending the call.
i decided to go make some food for when she got back, i mean she just took time out of her day to comfort me when she couldâve ignored me and spent time with her friends, so i wanted to do something for her.
i put my headphones in and turned some music on, then began making the food. because i had my headphones in, i didnât hear when billie walked in the house. i was in the middle of stirring the food when i felt two arms wrap around my waist, and one of my headphones being taken from my ear.
i flinched before i heard her voice.
âhey baby, i missed you.â she whispered to me, placing a gentle kiss on my neck.
âi missed you more bil.â i smiled, turning in her arms to hug her.
we swayed side to side for a minute before i heard her speak.
âiâm gonna go change, do you need any help?â
i shook my head and smiled, giving her a gentle kiss before she spoke again.
âare you feeling better now? did it help when you called earlier? i just wanna make sure youâre okay.â she took my hands into hers.
âi feel so much better thank you my love. iâm sorry i had to call you whilst you were spending time with your friends.â i mumbled the last part, feeling genuinely guilty.
âdonât be sorry angel. i want you to call me anytime you feel like that no matter what iâm doing. i care about you so much and iâd do anything to make sure youâre okay.â
âare you sure?â i whispered.
she pulled me closer into her embrace again.
âof course iâm sure. now iâm gonna go change and then we can talk about what was bothering you. okay?â
i nodded against her, letting her go before i finished the food.
#billie eilish#billie eilish fanfiction#billie eilish fic#fanfic#fanfiction#billie eilish x fem!reader#billie eilish x reader#billie eilish fluff#wlw fluff#fluff#wlw#wlw post#wlw blog
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Now and Tomorrow and Everyday After (Sylus x F! Reader) MDNI 18+
Synopsis: In spite of the 'tails' attempts to separate you from Sylus, it only seems to bring the two of you closer.
CW: Fingering, Oral (Female receiving), P in V, Praise Kink, after care, adult themes
Author Disclaimer- I do not own the LADS characters or lore and did use some dialogue from the recent banner's Sylus Card. I do NOT use AI and do not permit anyone else (or any other entity) to copy and advertise my work as their own. Definitely not proof read or edited because I was having âdonât post fearâ and just needed to go for it.
Author Note: I made an attempt and this is my first time writing Sylus and posting it so yeah! Thanks for reading- all kind comments, likes, and reblogs are appreciated! Remember, to be kind to yourself and others today! I also high key think Sylus is going to this zone to protect MC from Ever cause he makes mention of that but that's beside the point.
 *this is my take on the Night of Secrecy Card. I wanted to fill in some gaps*
You pick at your nails nervously under the warm air of the AC. The city of Linkon passes you by- your eyes flickering to Sylus every so often as he drives you both to one of his safe houses.Â
 Your nerves are on fire- not from the danger of whatever pot Sylus decided to stir up, but rather the fact that tonight is the night.
 Or so you have decided.
 And the night meaning boning. You want to bone this man hard.
Okay- wait, itâs probably more like make love to, but you arenât sure where you stand in Sylusâ life or if his feelings are all that deep.
 And would he even be capable of feeling that way towards you?Â
 The thought makes that tight ring of nerves turn into a heavy ball in the pit of your stomach. Sylus really means a lot to you and you feel he shares that sentiment, but you have also been wrong before and it ended up just being a friends with benefits situation. You werenât âgirlfriend materialâ as you often joked with Tara.Â
 But he is having you tag along, you think, he didnât say he didnât want you around. He just said he was leaving to protect you so maybe-
 âWhat are you agonizing about over there?â
 Shit.
âIf you changed your mind-â
âNo!â You say probably too abruptly, âIâm fine- everything is great, better than great even! Just thinking.â
Sylus chuckles and you donât even have to look at him to know he is seeing right through. He knows you better than anyone at this point and he knows when something is bothering you.
 You would honestly consider Sylus the closest thing to a best friend you could ever have. You can confide in him, depend on him, and you have a lot of fun with him.
 For the most part, you think he has learned to depend on you, confide in you, and he certainly seems to enjoy himself when he is in your company. Luke and Kieran say they can tell when heâs been with you because heâs less trigger happy with the people heâs dealing with (which youâll take as a win if you need to find one somewhere).Â
 Not to mention- the way his hands were splayed along your thighs last night when he sat you on the kitchen counter was mind numbingly intimate. His fingers drew gentle shapes on your bare skin and left goosebumps in their wake. Sylusâ forehead was pressed against your own and his lips mere inches away, but he didnât kiss you and you have been thinking about that all day.Â
 What if he didnât want to because heâs just trying to lead you on until you are of no use to him? What if all of these nice things and words and actions are all just to make sure you will still help him and resonating wonât be an issue again?Â
 âWhat is it?â His voice is gentle, âmaybe I can help you be less⊠befuddled.â
 You shoot him a look that earns you a laugh, but you can see the genuine concern in his eyes. Sylus has been so invested in hiding you from the worst parts of his world and now that heâs opened up, heâs worried heâs lost you unintentionally and that all the time you have spent together is long forgotten.Â
 You shrink slightly into your seat- avoiding his eyes the best you can and you say your question as quietly as you possibly can.
âI didnât catch that, Kitten.â
 You say it slightly louder now but still not enough and you can feel the deadpan look he is giving you.
âHowdoyouknowifsomeoneisromanticallyinterestedinyou?â
 Itâs all a bunch of gibberish, you had been far more confident of your assessment of his feelings when you were both walking and he was holding your hand. That would have been a really natural transition into discovering this question without any anxiety, but now youâve had time to think about it and overthinking is the enemy of success.Â
 And love, evidently.Â
 âHow they treat you, I suppose.â
 âWhat do you mean?â
 âWell, sweetie, when someone is interested in you romantically, they may do things like hold your hand, call you pet names,â he says with the slightest bit of humor, âgo to the movies, buy you gifts, play the Claw Machine until itâs dark outside and the arcade owner has to finally kick you both out. Maybe even play kitty cards in spite of losing almost every match because their opponent is a cheater.â
âI am not a-â
 Your brain does a hard reset as you begin to realize what he is trying to tell you.Â
 Sylus is telling you âyes- I am romantically interested in youâ and the dumbest, biggest smile ever on your face.Â
âWas that the answer you were looking for?â
 You nod, suddenly feeling shy, âyeah- that was exactly the answer I was looking for.âÂ
 The rest of the ride is quiet with one of his hands on the steering wheel and the other on your thigh. You watch as the city quickly turns into a distant dream and Sylusâ safe house, not to your surprise, is very very large and it does very little to calm your nerves.Â
 âI see owning multiple properties can be quite handy. A smart crow always has a few tricks up his sleeves.â
âThe same can be said about having multiple slippers.â
 You turn to him and stick your tongue out playfully, âha ha, very funny.
âThis safehouse doesnât happen to warm up, does it?â your teeth begin to chatter slightly and your bare legs are littered in goose bumps, âitâs colder than hell in here.â
 Sylus rolls his eyes at you, but begins to walk towards the fire place.
âIt is snowing outside.â
 The warm hues of the fire illuminated the room and reveals several boxes scattered about, some opened and others not. The rest of the house looks similar to his main house, but maybe slightly more scaled down. Itâs beautiful and it has a great view of Linkon and the mountains behind it. Itâs almost easy to forget this is a safe house and not a vacation home. Â
 âIâll leave after dawn. You should stay here for a while.â
 You turn with a scoff, âI know your âterritoryâ is pretty safe, but as I said, a hunter doesnât like being passive.â
 âReally?â
  You choose to ignore him- knowing all too well that he will suss out your plan to join him on his dangerous little adventure. There isnât a single thing in the whole world that could convince you to stay here otherwise, but Sylus has his own ways of ensuring things go the way he wants and you donât feel like waking up handcuffed somewhere for your own safety.
âWhatâs with all the gifts? I didnât think you celebrated Christmas.â
 Sylus chuckles, âI donât, sweetie. I held an⊠âappraisal salonâ not that long ago.
âWould you like to take a look?â
 It honestly is kind of like being in a candy shop, but the candy shop is the black market and instead of delicious treats, they sell guns and while guns are cool (when used appropriately), they certainly arenât helping you get Sylus any closer to the bedroom than you were five minutes ago.Â
âLook at these bad boys!â You hold the unwrapped vintage gun, âthis is a classic piece and very difficult to find.â
 Then a stroke of genius occurs.
âLetâs have a contest,â you flash a cheeky grin, âwhoever can disassemble their gun first gets to ask the other any question they want.â
âYou truly are relentless.â
 And of course Sylus agrees because heâs Sylus and he loves a good challenge. However, you are extremely determined to be the person asking the question and you know this specific gun quite well. You and Caleb learned how to shoot using these guns and you could disassemble it by telling it to.
 The gun is pointed at Sylusâ chin right as he is about to finish putting together his own weapon. You eat up the delicious grin on his face. It makes you feel empowered- he makes you feel empowered.
âFirst- say the thing.â
He rolls his eyes and gives you a soft smile, âI like your confidence and your determination very much. Now go ahead, ask your question.â
 Uh oh- you hadnât actually thought that far ahead.
âIâm sleepy.â
 WHAT ARE YOU EVEN SAYING RIGHT NOW?
 Sylus looks a bit perplexed and you cannot blame him- you need to fix this NOW!
âCan you⊠tuck me in?â
âI thought a certain relentless hunter would ask about my destination.â
You shrug, âI care more about the present than an answer I wonât get. So will you do it or not?â
 Sylus is suddenly swinging you up into his arms and you yelp in surprise, but it doesnât seem to get the usual laughing reaction you thought it would. Instead, there is a heat in his eyes that you have seen before but could never place what he was feeling until you began to feel it too.Â
 âOf course, Kitten,â his nose brushes against yours, âthis request is way more powerful than that little gun.â
 Every footstep closer to the bedroom is another step towards you having to be brave and you find yourself studying Sylusâ features as the dim light of the hall lamps barely kisses his features. He is so beautiful- you could probably study him forever and find more things you adore about him.
 He catches you looking and he returns your smile of adoration- flinging your shoes to the side and going to set you on the couch to quite literally tuck you in.Â
 And ACTION!
 âIâm not ready to lie down just yet.â
 Sylus cocks an eyebrow, âif you donât want to lie down, I can keep holding you until I leave.â
 âWhat if I donât want you to leave?â
 Your question hangs in the air and itâs hidden meaning seems obvious to you, but then Sylus puts you down on the ground and you realize he may have missed the actual meaning of your words. Is it that unbelievable that you would want to have sex or are you doing a magnificently poor job of conveying that point?
 âWe better make the most of our time until dawn then.â
 In the spur of the moment and desire coursing through your veins, you find the courage to push him down onto the couch behind him. With a gracefulness you have never been able to execute before, you straddle him and the way his breath hitches makes something inside you break.
  Sylusâ face is an adorable and sexy pink and his breathing becomes more unsteady in your clumsy hands.
 When your lips finally touch his, it feels as if you have been asleep your entire life until this very moment.Â
 Your fingers find purchase in his hair and Sylus pulls you into him- his fingers surely leaving bruises along the back of your thigh. The kiss is filled with passion and desperation- his skin feels like itâs on fire under your touch and every moan against your lips sends shockwaves through you.Â
 âYou really donât want me to leave.â
 To emphasize his point- you tease his lower lip between your teeth that makes him feel absolutely feral.Â
âS-Sylus,â you pant between kisses, âover there.â
 You anticipated him to be a bit rougher, maybe throwing you down on the bed or something, but he lays you down gently like you are a precious, fragile gift. His hands are firm and confident as he cradles you, needing to have you as close as physically possible.Â
 Your clumsy hands make quick work of the buttons on his shirt and loosening his tie. Your hands glide across his chest and your nails gently graze your territory- one of your nails taking the time drag across his nipple. Sylus bites your lower lip in response, his hips grinding into you, and the growl that claws itâs way up his throat excites you. Your heart feels as if itâs beating out of your chest by the time he pulls away and (not so gently) takes of your shirt.
 The cool air is a stark contrast to the heat you feel on the inside- Sylus roams your bare chest and core with his eyes, his fingers hooking into your pants and pulling them down. You help by lifting your hips at an embarrassingly fast pace.
 âLooks like we are on the same page with not wanting to waste any time.âÂ
 He crushes his lips against yours again, leaving bruising kisses on every inch of skin he comes in contact with. Sylus returns the favor from earlier, his practiced mouth circling your nipple with care. His tongue flicks and laps at the sensitive skin and his teeth are quick to follow, leaving love marks and spit littering your skin before making his way to the the other.Â
 You are mesmerized as you watch him- your core wound tight and dripping with need at the sight of him worshipping your body. Leaning back, you close your eyes and enjoy every single sensation.Â
 You have soaked the bed underneath you by the time he makes his way between your legs- you are so caught up in his silent worship that you can barely focus on the task at hand.
 Strong, corded arms pull you to the edge of the bed and you jolt from your bliss filled daze- and God are you grateful you have. Sylus looks beautiful between your legs with his cocky smirk and pink cheeks- his warm breath lingers on the sensitive skin between your thighs.Â
  With your legs slung over his shoulders- Sylus licks a stripe along your folds and ends at your clit, circling the sensitive nub and making lewd noises that you have only ever heard in porn. No one has truly, properly gone down on you and when they have, it always seemed like a chore.
âSy-Sylus, you donât have to if you don't wan-â
 You are cut off when he sucks on your clit, his tongue taking the time to tease the nerves and leave you a whimpering mess.
âIâm not doing anything I havenât thought about doing for a very long time now,â he kisses along the inside of your thighs, ânow stay focused, kitten.
âDonât look.â
 One of your hands tangles in his hair and the other twists into the sheets. Sylus feasts and laps up your pleasure, his face covered in your essence and his nose breathes in your heady scent with happy, deep hums. His large hands roam your body, keeping your hips down and your legs clenched around him. They eventually return to your sore nipples and those practice, cold hands, become warm and attentive. He gropes and squeezes your breasts in time with his tongue as it darts in and out of your heat, his nose working to keep your bundle of nerves stimulated.
âSy-â you clench your legs around his head tightly, a string of curse words leaving your mouth, âf-fuck- Iâm, Iâm-â
 Sylusâ fingers dip between your folds and his tongue returns to your clit. His other hand holds down your hips as his fingers drive you to your first orgasm of the night. Your moans are shrill and untamed- embarrassing almost- but the more you sing for him, the harder Sylus works to get more and more of those pretty noises out of your mouth.Â
 When he finally comes up for air, your pleasure is dripping from around his mouth and down his chin. Crimson eyes make eye contact with you and he brings his soaked fingers to his lips- shamelessly savoring the taste of you on his skin.Â
 You can barely contain yourself when he begins to crawl along you- your greedy hands using his hands to pull him to you faster. Sylus gazes at you adoringly and you are overwhelmed with your own affections for him. You went from hating him to loving him, desiring him, and at least for tonight, he is all yours.Â
âWhat are you thinking about?â
 Mindlessly, your hand cups his cheek and your thumb traces the spot where a scar should be from your first encounter.
âAm I being too greedy⊠if I ask you to keep your eyes only on me?â
 Sylus almost looks relieved by your words, grabbing your arm and leaving a plethora of kisses as if to reward you for being open with him.
âYou always had that right,â his warm breath and deep tone sends goosebumps of excitement up your spine, âwhich means⊠you can be even greedier. Do you want it, kitten?â
 Your breath catches when you realize what he is insinuating and you blink a few times before nodding. He smiles and leans down, but you stop him momentarily. Your mind feels like it is going a thousand miles a minute as you run through every negative outcome. What if you are really bad in bed? What if he decides he doesnât want to be with you or bother with you anymore after you share such an intimate moment with each other?
âSylus-â
âYou havenât changed your mind, have youâŠ? You just said âyes?â his voice is desperate, âIâm hoping yes is still your answer because⊠I just canât hold back anymore.â
 A wave of want and need flows through you, but before you can continue, you want to make sure this isnât the beginning of the end.
âIf we do this,â you whisper, âif we have this intimate moment together- you canât just disappear on me. I want you, Sylus. Now and tomorrow and everyday after.â
 The Onychinus leader blinks a few times before the largest smile paints his face.
âOh, y/n,â he sighs against your lips, âyou have no idea how long I have wanted to hear you say those words.â
 Sylus kisses you deeply, his lips caress yours and your hands explore each other- your nails make designs in his back as you try to keep yourself as close to him as you possibly can. Sylusâ clothed crotch is stained in the mess between your legs while he rocks his hips into you. His hand is tangled in your hair and the other is pressing you flush to his sweat soaked chest. The kiss only continues to deepen in passion and need- you barely get him to let you take a moment to breathe.Â
âHe-hey- no biting here,â you tease, pulling him back by his hair after he nips the skin on your neck a bit too roughly.
 His pupils are blown wide with lust and pent up frustration, âFirst you want it rough, then you want it soft. Youâre a tough one to please tonight, y/n.âÂ
 You are lost in the depths of his eyes and the pooling of emotions behind them. You forget to breathe until he breaks eye contact to leave soothing kisses over the bite mark.Â
âWhat do you really want?â he uncharacteristically pleads, âwonât you tell me like you just did?â
 While his voice may be innocent, you are far from believing this act. With a smirk, you use your strength to roll him on his back and your hands intertwine with his- keeping them pinned to the bed. The look of surprise on his face is refreshing, to say the least.
 You lean down and kiss him slowly, nipping at his lower lip and eating up the breathy chuckle he releases.
âI told you a hunter doesnât like being passive.â
âSo you want control?âÂ
  You nod victoriously, certain you are going to be the one in control tonight. Sylus returns your confident smile with one of mischief before he somehow pins you down in the spot he was before.Â
 Sylus chuckles deeply, âUnfortunately, I canât give it to you. Not yet, at least.â
  Before you can inquire about what he means, you feel the pressure of two of his fingers sliding inside your wet cunt. An open mouthed, guttural moan leaves your lips and Sylus just watches- his other hand holding your chin so he can make eye contact. He wants to see your pleasure and know he is the only one you are thinking of- the only one you are seeing.
 Sylus wants you to know- no, understand- that you are his, not anyone elseâs.Â
 âSy-sylus,â you plead, âpl-please I ne-â
âDonât run.â
 Your back arches upwards and you try to pull away from his hand when you feel a warm wave gush and soak the sheets beneath you. Sylus doesnât relent and quickly coaxes another orgasm from your shaking body.Â
âYo-youâre⊠so annoyingâŠâ
âI wonât deny it,â he crawls off of you with a grin, âI guess you can say I lied. Tonight, youâre not the only one feeling greedyâŠâÂ
 Sylus unzips his pants and pulls down his brief- his cock springs free and slaps against his lower ab muscles. Your mouth is watering in anticipation at his size- of course heâs perfect. Heâs Sylus.Â
 He climbs back on the bed and pulls you closer to him- the head of his cock presses against your folds and you feel yourself clench around nothing.
âI misspoke.â
âWhatâŠ?â
 Is he changing his mind?
âGreed can never be satisfied,â he places your hand on his chest, your hearts beating in sync, âbut you can temporarily soothe it.
âSay it again, y/n, do you want it?â
 Time feels like it stops completely when his eyes meet yours. Your devotion and adoration for each other is magnetic- an unspoken magic between both of you. Your fingers lace themselves in his hair, pulling him to you and you take your time to kiss him slowly, reassuringly.Â
âThis is my answer.â
  Whatever lust and want that had been held back erupts within an instant. Sylus crushes your lips with his and he slowly glides himself inside of you- your legs tighten around his torso and your whine of pleasure interrupts the heated kiss.
âF-fuck, y/n.â
 Sylusâ pace is both gentle and punishing- you can feel him trying to be gentle, but the more he holds himself back, the more you want him to let go.
âLet go, Sy,â you whisper, âIâm yours.â
 His hips set a punishing pace- your collective sighs and moans are the melody to the filthy sound of sex soaked skin and your hips meeting. His tip grazes the opening of your cervix and his abs stimulate your aching clit. The spongy sensitive spot inside of you is relentlessly stimulated with each movement.
âSuch a good girl,â he growls into your ear, âfuck youâre so tight.â
 Your only response to his praise is pathetic whimpers and cries. It doesnât stop him- if anything, he only begins to praise you more. Sylus is wrapped up in the moment and wants nothing more than to stay in this moment with you forever. You are safe and in his arms- he is finally reunited with you in body, mind, and soul and this spurs him on more, his cock driving into you harder and harder and his hands digging into the flesh of your ass and hips to keep you in place.
 You cling to each other, lips and teeth clashing against each other sloppily as you both lose your composure to the othersâ wanting. Your velvet walls clench around him desperately and your fingers try to find purchase on his back, in his hair, anywhere as your orgasm overtakes you.Â
 With a few more rough thrusts, Sylus stutters inside of you and thick ropes of cum coats the inside of your walls and fills you to the brim. He lays on top of you with very little of his weight, his face in the crook of your neck. Sylus leaves soft kisses along your neck and sings words of praise that you can barely register.Â
 At some point, he gets up and you hear the bathtub turn on and the soft padding of feet. Sylusâs strong arms cradle you- taking you to the now filled bathtub that is more than big enough for two.Â
 You straddle his lap so that you can face him. Sylus kisses you slowly while he cleans you- pouring water on your hair, scrubbing your scalp, cleaning the sweat along your shoulders and on the back of your neck. You return the favor, taking your time to make sure he can feel all the love you have for him and how much you care for him.Â
 He helps you lotion and brush your teeth- at no point do your feet ever actually touch the ground again. Sylus sets you on the couch in one of his shirts and begins to change the sheets.
âDo you want some help?â you offer, your legs sore, but not wanting to be too much of a pillow princess.
 Sylus rolls his eyes at you, âIâm capable of tackling this mission on my own, sweetie, but I will let you know if another pressing issue arises.â
 You scoff playfully and wait for him to finish making the bed. Sylus picks you up and places you on the bed, you snuggle up next to him as soon as he lies down and, much like when you were in the grasslands, you lay your head on his bicep and he pulls you closer to him. You have never felt quite so warm or safe in your entire life and your resolve only hardens further.
 You cannot allow Sylus to go by himself into the jaws of danger. You refuse to.
 You turn and kiss his bicep, settling deeper into his arms.
âGood night, my clever Crow,â you say with a yawn, âremember not to steal the blanket.â
 He snorts, âI will try my best, kitten. Now get some rest- Iâll keep you safe.â
 You nod- knowing in your heart that you will always be safe with Sylus around- and let sleep take you. You have a long flight and some ass whooping on the agenda tomorrow, after all.
#sylus lads#sylus love and deepspace#sylus x mc#love and deepspace sylus#sylus smut#sylus fluff#sylus x reader#lads mc#lads sylus#lads x reader#lnds sylus#l&ds sylus#sylus x you#sylus qin#sylus x y/n#sylus#sylus x oc#sylus x female reader#sylus l&ds#sylus lnd
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Hi! Do you have any advice for switching pov in the middle of a scene without it feeling just...wrong?
Like, yeah, this scene will be in character A's point of view but in one particular moment of the scene B's perspective is also important. How could I do that swiftly, without confusing the readers?
Thanks xx
Hi, here's an excerpt from this post and another reference linked below:
Tips for Writing From Multiple Points of View
Switching between charactersâ perspectives can be a great tool in novel writing, but it can also confuse your reader. Here are some tips from various writers:
Clearly define perspective shifts. Each time you change perspectives, make it abundantly clear to your reader. If your reader is busy trying to figure out which characterâs head theyâre in, they wonât be paying as much attention to whatâs going on in the story. All that head-hopping can make your reader feel frustrated. You can make this clear to the reader by giving each character a distinct voice, repeating a characterâs name, or having one character narrate from the present tense and another from the past tense. Another strategy is to give your perspective changes a regular pattern, so your reader can anticipate those shifts.
Give each character a unique perspective and voice. Each character should have something unique to contribute to the story that only they can share. You donât necessarily have to change the point of view, but you should give your characters individualized personalities and opinions. If your characters all have the same voice, your reader will get confused about who is speaking. Plus, characters wonât seem as real or believable.
Beat sheets and outlines for multiple POVs. Use outlining tools if it works for you. Some writers find them helpful to keep track of the multiple characters, and even timelines.
Pay attention to point of view and tense. In nonlinear storytelling, it often makes sense to inhabit different perspectives by changing point of view and tense. Maybe the bulk of your story is written in the present tense from the first-person POV of your main character, while flashbacks are written in the past tense and in third-person. Or, you may want to include multiple points of view from different characters existing in different time periods. All of that is possible, but make sure youâre keeping track of point of view and tense changes to avoid confusing your reader. Avoid changing POV or tense in the middle of a scene, and consider making a chapter break every time you change point of view.
Additional Reference â More: Notes & References â Writing Resources PDFs
Choose which of these tips would work best for your story. Hope this helps!
#pov#writing tips#writeblr#literature#writers on tumblr#writing reference#dark academia#spilled ink#writing prompt#creative writing#writing advice#on writing#writing inspiration#writing ideas#light academia#lit#writing resources#last of this group of requests -- will be back again soon
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WEEKLY UPDATES ⧠6TH TO 12TH JANUARY â JANUARY UPDATES â hi guys! i'll be leaving you a brief description of the fics i'll be posting this week in case you're interested :) â all of them are requests you've sent me! so, in case you want me to write something you'd like to read, send me your request via inbox or on this google form â current taglist: @hc-dutch @raavadakedavra @coffeedestroyingperson @evey-kuznetskova @bowielovesyou @chaoswithus @isotopemylove @iceman-kazansky @gwginnyweasley @formula1-motogpfan @herdetectivetheorist [in case you wanna be tagged just tell me so i can add you!]
âžș YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN YOUR FACE Ferrari Sebastian Vettel x Pregnant Wife!Reader âł Available on January 10th Seb's wife is pregnant, but she hasn't told him yet since she doesn't seem ready. However, after he almost crashed pretty badly during a Free Practice session, she can't help but tell him in not the best way possible
âžș SĂ... ESTAMOS SALIENDO Oscar Piastri x PĂ©rez!Reader âł Available on January 11th Scared of everyone to find out, Y/N PĂ©rez and Oscar Piastri decide to hide their relationship from everyone until Checo starts wondering how Piastri learnt to speak Spanish so good... and specially why he has a Mexican accent
âžș THE MOMENT I KNEW Max Verstappen x Reader âł Available on January 12th After a few races where he didn't get the results he expected, Max decides to go out with some friends to disconnect from everything. Unluckily, one of those days when he arrives home after having some drinks, he finds out that he missed his girlfriend's birthday as soon as he sees the cake she ordered on the trash
#veeâs january updates#formula 1#f1#formula 1 x reader#f1 x reader#formula 1 fic#f1 fic#f1 masterlist#sebastian vettel x reader#sebastian vettel fic#oscar piastri x reader#oscar piastri fic#oscar piastri#sebastian vettel#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen#max verstappen fic#max verstappen one shot#sebastian vettel one shot#oscar piastri one shot#formula 1 one shot#f1 one shots
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As I'm working on my post-botw au I have the final design of my Link
It's been a year of me trying to find a design and writing this project I wouldn't say its finished but I'm at a great starting point.
A big thanks to the people who helped me continuing this projects bc I was stuck for months XD
The premise takes place after botw when Link and Zelda found out Ganon's skeleton (inspired by totk trailer) this au doesn't have zonai. If you are wondering what happened? Gloom takes over Link's body. Purah helped making the suit with the remains of the divine beast and ancient Guardians parts.
The Adventure starts with Zelda this time(still a wip) meanwhile Link goes to the depths. Later on they both will work together.
However Link will be not alone after awhile...someone is watching him or maybe waiting for him
I'm still working on this project in the meantime, it's not done but big thanks to my friends helping me out with this.
I'm currently writing a fanfic abt this au and designing Zelda, it might take some time but don't worry!!! I'm still working once I have free time
This started as a joke and began something more, I wouldn't made it to this point if it wasn't for my friends!!
I just ask any of you to be patient in the meanwhile but I hope I'm not letting anyone out I'm just trying my best to make it memorable.
I'm very proud of my progress on this project!!
#tloz au#tloz post botw au#tloz fanart#tloz post botw au fanart#idk how to tag this#idek what to name this au#tloz link fanart#tloz#my linksona??#tloz linksona(?)#honestly im just half away but i cant spoil much#i apologize for bad English#its not my native language#if anyone wants to beta read my fanfic to help me out with writing (my first time writing one)#myart#my art
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Forever and Always
Pairing: Lilia Calderu x reader
Summary: No one warns you about how dark the abyss at the cliff's edge can be, how hard it would be to hold on to the rocks as they kept falling around you, the weight on your shoulders nearly too much for you. No one ever does, yet she never failed at saving you from dying under it all, her warm embrace like a protection spell.
Warnings: overworked reader, burnt out, screaming, swearing, self-harm. I don't think I need to add anything else here.
Authors note: I read your post @madamspellmans-met-tet and I thought of writing this. I hope that it is what you had in mind and that it helps your friend find comfort :) If there is anything at all that you don't like, tell me and I'll change it, I wouldn't want to write something hurtful. I hope you like it.
Forever and Always
Rereading the message that had popped up on your phone you just couldnât believe it. The bright light shone inside the cabin of Liliaâs old car, which she allowed you to borrow so you could get to work and your classes, your eyes going over the words three times before you let your head fall onto the steering wheel nearly making the horn go off. You could feel the tension increasing in every single muscle of your body, the pressure that had been inside your sinuses and the dull nausea that you had carried all day suddenly feeling as if they could wipe you out, frustration filling up every cell down to atomic levels, but you just couldnât let it pass, it had to be finished tonight, no matter what. Unlocking your phone, you answered Amanda and told her that it was fine, that you could finish her part of the project and send it before twelve tomorrow, but in your mind you were cursing her and her ancestors and her ancestorsâ ancestors and beyond. You knew she wasnât sick, a friend you had in common had told you that she was going down to a party in New York and she would stay there for like three days or so. You could have told her to go and fuck herself but she hadnât done shit in the past month, and the project needed to be handed out the next day, so you had to stay up all night now, maybe even beg your teacher to let you hand in the assignment one day late and pray that he didnât deduct points because of it. And on top of that you had to do a double shift down at the coffee shop tomorrow because one of the girls had to have emergency surgery after a skiing accident and you were even more short staffed.
Your fingers were twitching when you picked up your bag from the passengerâs seat, throwing it over your shoulder as you pushed the door open and stepped out into the cold night, your breath steaming up in puffs that twirled up in the air as you locked the car. Your body ached, every bone seemed to hurt, and your throat itched so bad that you had had like three gulps of cough syrups and at least one Tylenol about six hours ago to try and get rid of it, to no avail. Resting your back against the car you closed your eyes for a moment. You were not ready for the disappointed look that Lilia was going to give you the instant you stepped into the shop, but your manager had practically ordered you to lock up tonight and you had had to label also the new arrival of milks and cookies in the freezer, which turned the extra hour into two and a half. You had been supposed to get home at seven and it was now close to ten, and you had hardly been able to tell her that you were going to be late, just a single message thatâs she had left on read. With a heavy sigh you crossed the street from the car to the front door, pulling out your keys and pushing the glass open until the warmth of the heating system embraced you, but it didnât relax you as much as you had expected, you still felt as if you were absolutely freezing. Noises were coming from the back, the clutter of dishes you thought, stopping for a moment when the bell that hung from the ceiling rung melodiously before they returned, unbothered by your entrance it seemed.
In normal circumstances you would have thrown your bag next to the door, not giving two shits, but you needed the books and notes that you had in there, so with heavy steps you made your way to the beady curtain, gently moving it aside, finally arriving home. Lilia was washing the dishes, her back to you. Seeing her body moving as she scrubbed hard, her shoulders square and obviously tense as she worked you wondered if maybe she was mad at you, but there wasnât really anything you could do when you had to stay late, it was that or unemployment, and you needed the money to pay for college, so there really was no reason why she should be angry. At least you had bothered to warn her this time. But even if she was pissed at you she was far too alluring, and your eyes could not stop watching the way those veiny hands held onto the sponge and plate hard, knuckles nearly white, the way her gown held onto her curves gently as her robe had been discarded over the back of a chair, the flowy material swaying around her bare feet as she rinsed and left the plate on the drying rack. In the air a salty smell lingered, your stomach rumbling at it but the nausea that was still clinging to your insides seeming to disagree with how hungry you felt, the thought of food both appealing and at the same time a horrible idea, though your train of thought derailed when you felt your phone vibrating in your pocket, the quiet moment you were having shattered. Fucking Amanda again you saw, a new text telling you that she was very sorry and that she would make it up to you which you knew was bullshit, followed by a new message saying that Tom, another person you were doing this assignment with, could not finish his part either as he was sick with the same thing she had. Was that code for Iâm taking him to New York to fuck him? She had to be kidding.
You were quick to respond, eyebrows furrowed as you typed an answer, telling her that you werenât sure if you could handle it all, but she retorted that Tom would end up in the hospital if he did any work. Was she for real? Did she think you lived under a fucking rock or something, that you didnât talk to people? Apparently so, because she finished by saying that she was going to be sick from all that talking and went offline. You hadnât noticed how Lilia had turned around and was staring at you, drying her hands with a tea towel, the frown that had adorned her forehead turning into worry when she saw your pissed off face as you furiously typed. She hadnât noticed how pale you were looking, or how deep the bags under your eyes were, but then again you applied so much make up in the morning that it was nearly impossible for her to have noticed when she woke up, perhaps five minutes before you were due to leave for work. She had seen you sick several times in all the time you had been together, but she had never seen you look so run down before, and that worried her. The frustration you were feeling was reaching a breaking point, but you could not afford a bad mark to taint your record, you needed to be a straight A student otherwise you would not get scholarships to investigate, just like you had always dreamt of, you had to push through. You would rest when all this was over, you thought, a little white lie that you had been telling yourself for years now.
Dumping your bag on the kitchen table you hadnât even looked up to meet Liliaâs eyes, you were far too focused on getting the work done before you collapsed, pulling out several thick books you had borrowed from the library along with the close to four hundred pages worth of notes you had been taking since the beginning of the year, photocopies, schemes and drawings included. Lilia had not moved from her spot, not even an inch, her head following your frame as you headed for the drawers next to the TV and pulled out an old laptop you had been gifted like three years ago, turning back to the table only to lock eyes with her. She looked so beautiful tonight, why did she look so pretty? It wasnât your anniversary or her birthday, maybe it wasnât a special occasion, maybe she looked like that always and you had only noticed now, after not having properly looked at her in over a week. There was pang of guilt in your heart, but you couldnât waste more time, and yet breaking her gaze was such a hard task, she seemed to be pulling you into her arms simply by raising her eyebrows ever so slightly, almost in a questioning manner, but you looked away and sat down. You were actively avoiding talking to her? She felt as if you were pushing her aside, away from you with this behaviour, hurt and anger mingling in her chest, fury glazing her vision as she bent to open the oven. It took the computer a few minutes to unlock, but once the wallpaper and icons were staring back at you, a picture of you and Lilia during a weekend trip to the Grand Canyon, you quickly clicked on the Word document titled âOntogeny in Ammonoidsâ, the twenty pages you had written greeting you.
You loved your degree, but you hated it at the same time, scrolling through the pictures and diagrams you had both taken from books and done yourself with the information collected and provided by your teacher. You had loved it when you had first started it, but now you had to add at least twenty more pages, and you didnât even know where to begin, your head resting on your hands for an instant, closing your eyes as you felt a heavy headache forming. What were you supposed to write? God, you had no fucking clue what their parts were, it was as if your brain had turned to sudden mush and you could not even comprehend a basic sentence, let alone carry on with this bloody project. Suddenly there was a loud bang right next to the computer, your head jerking up so fast that a whipping feeling hit your neck, rendering you immobile for a few moments, eyes looking at an oven tray that had landed on top of your notes, the dark sauce of a rotisserie chicken splattered over the words, staining and making some of the ink run.
-Lilia! What the hell?! â you pushed the tray hurriedly to the side, inspecting the damage done as anger rose in your veins. Looking up briefly at her you saw an angry smirk on her lips, hands on her hips. So now she wanted to be a bitch, great, as if you needed more people testing your patience.
-Oh, you are home, I didnât see you there.
-What the fuck?!
-Donât curse at me Y/N!
-What the hell do you expect when youâve ruined my notes?!
-I expect you to look at me when you come home, for you to give me an explanation as to why you its ten and youâve just only arrived!
-I canât say no to my manager Lilia, you know this! â some of the words were unintelligible, impossible to fix unless you redid the entire page, front and back, anger spiking to the point that you feared anything at all could make it burst. And to top it all you were wasting time! You had deadlines and you need to be at the coffee shop at seven! You were going to have to pull an all-nighterâ Fuck, Iâm going to have to redo this.
-As if you do anything else.
You glared up at her, but the anger subsided when suddenly you had a coughing fit, turning your face away from her and covering your mouth with your hand. Lilia had turned around at the speed of light upon hearing you, bending her body over the kitchen table to check on you, worry painting her features. All the fight had left your body after that, the exhaustion slamming onto your body without mercy, as you let it fall back onto the chair. Lilia was still upset with you, but after what she had just seen it was obvious that you werenât just tired, no, you were getting sick, and yet you turned your attention back to the computer, sighing deeply when you looked at your notes and then back at the screen. She felt quite guilty about what she had done, thinking that perhaps it had been rather childish form her part, so in an attempt to fix it she moved the tray away to plate some of the chicken along with the sauce, putting it aside while she went to grab a glass of water, adding a bit of lemon and a hint of honey, a little remedy she had been using for centuries now. Once that was done, she turned and rounded one of the corners of the table to sit on the only chair that laid facing you, but your eyes were glued to the screen, typing and then deleting only to type again, and you still didnât like what you were writing. The touch of Liliaâs soft skin on your hand made you pause, turning your blurry eyes in her direction. Maybe you had been rude, but you had spent a lot of time working on those notes, rewriting them would take a couple of hours for sure.
-Tell me the truth Y/N, are you okay?
-Iâm fine, Iâm just tired.
-Iâve seen you tired, and you are never like this.
-Iâm sorry, but what you did was really shitty.
-I know, Iâm sorry. I was angry; youâve never come home like this, without even saying a word. Maybe you need to stop and sleep.
-I would love to, but I canât. Amanda and Tom bailed on me, and we have to upload this to the net tomorrow and thereâs so much work left.
-Canât you talk with your teacher, get an extension?
-Heâs an ass, he wonât do it, he doesnât care. I just need to finish this, Lilia. I promise Iâll rest when Iâm done.
-Iâm giving you one hour, if you are not done in an hour, Iâm sorry, but you are not finishing it, Iâm dragging you to bed.
-Fine. Just⊠let me get on with it.
-Alright. You have dinner behind your computer, and donât tell me that you are not hungry because I know that you havenât had a bite to eat since lunch time, if youâve had lunch. Just eat, okay?
You nodded without much effort, knowing perfectly well that you were not really going to have much of the chicken, but you did grab the water, the warm liquid soothing your sore throat slightly. Lilia could feel the way you were melting, the way your resolution was slipping, but she also knew that you were not going to really stop, you were unable to, she had to let you get to a certain point, she just hoped that she didnât accidentally let you go past said point. With a quiet sigh she stood and kissed your forehead, heading back to tidy the dishes and clean the sink as you poured yourself back into the assignment. Word after word you seemed to be filling up pages, adding pictures and moving in between the text and the references, but your body was giving up on you. You could feel the way your fingers were heavy over the keyboard, how your eyesight was becoming blurry, the paragraphs you had written dancing before you, coughing every few minutes into the crook of your elbow and yet you did not stop, you couldnât stop. Liliaâs alarms were going off every time she heard you, but she had promised you an hour, though it was becoming harder and harder to keep her promise when her eyes could see from her spot on the couch how you were getting progressively worse, to the point that half of your precious notes had slipped down to the floor and you hadnât even noticed.
She should have stopped you then, a mistake from her part, she had simply thought it a slip up, but when she heard you curse under your breath and beginning to delete like a maniac, a frustrated huff escaping your lips before you banged your head on the kitchen table, she knew she had stop you right away. It had not even been thirty minutes, but she just couldnât let you carry on, pushing herself off the couch and walking towards your spot with quick steps. The wood dug onto your forehead, but you didnât care about it much, not when you had spent three whole pages writing about the wrong group of cephalopods and your whole head throbbed as your headache worsened, a pulsating feeling behind your eyes that increased the pressure on your sinuses as well. You felt like utter shit, actually that might not even cover it, your face squashed against the table, your arms hanging from your sides like ropes that seemed to weight as if they were lead, so heavy that you just couldnât lift them back onto the table. Sitting once again on the chair that was facing you, Lilia took your face in between her hands and pushed you up until you were resting against the back of the chair, cradling your cheeks, noticing that your eyes were glassy, your face slightly clammy to the touch, cheeks blushing but it wasnât due to something cheeky she had said, no, Lilia could feel how hot your skin felt against her palm. Thatâs it, she thought.
-You are done, darling. â her voice was quiet, nearly a whisper, but it boomed against the bones of your skull.
-What? No, I still have at least six other points that I need to address.
-I donât care Y/N. You are sick, you need to sleep.
-No, I donât! â you pushed her touch from you, missing the coolness of her hands against your skin the instant they left you even though they were still holding onto your hands, fingers intertwined, but you needed to carry on. She had said an hour, and it had only been twenty minutes, you could push through, you could do it. â I need to get this done or I will fail.
-Then fail.
-What? â there was the anger again, rising and bubbling inside your chest as you pushed her hands off your body completely, sitting properly back in front of the computer while still looking at Lilia utterly dumbfounded at her words. - You know how important this is for me!
-Yes, but Iâm not going to let it practically kill you!
-Wow, thatâs just being overdramatic, donât you think?
-Have you looked at yourself in the mirror lately?! You are two seconds away from collapsing on me Y/N!
-Iâm perfectly fine, Iâm just tired! Honestly, I make a mistake and get frustrated and suddenly Iâm an instant away from laying in a coffin?!
-If you donât stop you might! Just leave it, itâs not that important Y/N.
-It might not be to you! Canât you understand that if I finish this and I get an A I will have a perfect record?! I will get scholarships and job offers!
-So some job in a boring office is more important than your health?!
-Donât act so surprised, as if you didnât know that Iâve done it before. I will rest when Iâm done, so please Lilia, let me finish the fucking thing!
-Donât curse Y/N. And no, you are very much done. â without warning she closed up the laptop and grabbed it, your hands far too slow to hold on to it before she could actually remove it from the table, the thick book you had resting next to it closing with a loud thud. She had stood and moved away from the kitchen area into the living room, rounding the couch and muttering something under her breath so that an instant later two thick yellow chains appeared wrapping themselves around the computer, letting it rest on top of the coffee table. She had to be fucking kidding; you thought she would understand! Lifting yourself from the chair had been a harder task than you had anticipated, the world around you faintly, but you still stood on slightly shaky legs and headed her way, fury seeping from every pore in your body as you knelt over the carpet.
-Donât play with me Lilia! Open it!
-No. I donât like using my magic like this, but if itâs the only way to get you stop, I will.
-DONâT DO THIS TO ME LILIA! OPEN IT!
-Donât scream at me! I wonât tolerate it! Iâm doing this for your own good.
-Please Lilia, I need to finish this, please!
-Iâm sorry, I canât.
-You are such a bitch!
-Excuse me?!
-You heard me! You are being a bitch! â the temperature in the room was absolutely scorching, your jacket coming off, your hands throwing it onto the couch without you even noticing, as if your movements were on autopilot, nails trying to pry the laptop open, but it didnât do any good, it was perfectly shut. In anger you turned your head to look at her, tears stinging your eyes. - What do you want?! All my attention, thatâs why you are trying to ruin my life?!
-NO! Canât you see what all this is doing to you?! I want you to stop killing yourself! You donât deserve it Y/N.
-Iâm doing what Iâve always done, Lilia, I canât afford a slip up like this!
-And I canât let you carry on. You need to stop, you are sick, youâve overworked yourself so much that youâve made yourself sick. Why canât you understand that?
-Why canât YOU understand that if I canât stop! Iâve never stopped, I donât know how to!
The tears were running down your cheeks now, burning your skin as if they were molten lava, leaving streaks on your clammy flesh as they fell drop by drop onto your lap, your hands letting go of the laptop in defeat as your body dropped onto the carpet, back resting on the couch. How did one stop, how could anyone stop what theyâve only known for their entire life? You had never done anything but work and study, you had never simply sat down to do nothing for whole weeks at a time, there was always some shift at the coffee shop, some assignment, some presentation that needed to be done for the next day. You only knew how to work yourself down to the bone and beyond and you knew that it was reaching a breaking point, but you just didnât know what to do. Lilia saw you crumbling in front of her eyes, rushing and kneeling next to you to gather your shaking frame in her arms, swaying back and forth in a soothing motion. She had expected this to happen since she had seen you come in, and yet she felt so unprepared, unsure of what to say but if there was one thing she was sure about was that you needed her, and she would be there. Her eyes were looking at nothing, zoned out as every fibre of her being concentrated on you and the way your tears soaked her dress, your face pressed against her chest.
She might have been rude, cruel even, but you needed to hear it, needed to realise just how fucked up it was for people to overwork you like this, until you were so burnt out that you couldnât even keep your immune system healthy and strong. You could not help being like this, doing the only thing you knew, but that didnât mean Lilia could not help you see beyond, after all that was her thing as a divination witch. Looking down at you she could not help noticing some purple marks that painted the skin of your forearms, squinting to try and get a better look, distinguishing the blistered skin and burnt flesh surrounding each circular mark. They didnât seem to be fresh, as if they had happened today or the day before, but they were certainly not old wounds. Carefully she pushed you away from her body, your eyes blinking through the tears in confusion, feeling how she took your wrist gently with one hand and pushed your sleeve up so she could take a better look. Oh, crap, you had totally forgotten about them.
-Y/N? â you turned your head towards the floor, unable to hold her gaze, those deep eyes watching you with worry, but she took hold of your chin and tenderly lifted your head. â What happened?
-I swear I didnât do it on purpose⊠the first time. â you felt so ashamed about it all, how had you let your life become this⊠this sea of torment just to get the life you thought you were supposed to have. This wasnât the way to do it, it couldnât be. Your hand had travelled up to your mouth out of its on accord, the nail of your thumb in between your teeth as if the motion could make you feel less of the embarrassment that was coursing through your limbs. â I was at the shop, and I bumped into Jerry out in the terrace and his cigarette hit my arm. It was an accident but then⊠I bought a packet and⊠did it myself.
-Youâve been hurting yourself? Why?
-I⊠Iâm not sure. When Jerryâs cigarette hit my skin, I felt⊠something andâŠ
-And what?
-The pain somehow helped me push through, carry on with everything. I wanted that. I needed it.
-Darling.
-I know what you are going to say. I should have been more careful; I shouldnât have continued.
-No, love, you should have asked for help.
-Help?
-All this is too much for you, you canât do it all, you are only human. â it was so tenderly the way she cradled your face in her hands again, her fingers twirling your hair in between them as her thumbs wiped the tears that were still falling. -You canât hurt yourself so that the adrenaline helps you carry on. You canât hide the exhaustion and the frustration behind a veil of pain Y/N.
-How do I stop Lilia?
-By saying no. People take advantage of you, they think that since you are efficient, they can simply tell you to do it all, but you canât let them do that. Learning how to say no will help you in the long run, trust me.
-So, I simply fail?
-You tell your teacher what happened and if he doesnât like it, I will personally talk with him and request an extension. But it wonât be tomorrow; I was not kidding when I said that you were sick, you are running a temperature, darling. You are closing your books for today and going to sleep.
-And work? I have a double shift tomorrow.
-Youâve got sick days, use them. Let me carry what you canât, Y/N.
She always knew what to say, what to do to make you feel like the world wasnât crushing you under its weight when you very much felt as if it were, and with your hands holding onto the neckline of her gown you pushed yourself against her chest to hide your tears back into the warmth of her soft bosom. You had wanted nothing more than to cross the threshold of the beady curtain and let your exhausted body fall into her embrace, the silence of the room broken only by her sweet words, whispered lovingly in your ear as you both fell on the couch, the coolness of her skin comforting the tears that had gathered in your eyes. Those same tears that you were now crying as you let your walls crumble around you. Lilia wrapped her arms around your form, letting you break, fall apart. You had been holding on for far too long, you had been dangling from the top of a building with only on finger to keep you there for years now, you had to let yourself fall, you had to let your body step away from all that was destroying you and simply feel gravity pulling you down onto the ground, because once you reached it there would be no blood, no bones breaking over the pavement, only the soft gentle touch of Lilia keeping you safe and nestle in her arms. Both of you swayed back and forth on the floor, the carpet digging on Liliaâs knees, but she would not move, not until you were ready, and by the way you were holding onto her it would be a long time before she would part from you. With a kiss to the top of your head she pressed her cheek to your soft locks, her fingers rubbing your back and drawing lazy patterns over your t-shirt.
-Promise me one thing Y/N.
-What? â your voice was muffled by her chest, the vibrations reverberating through her body, but she still understood you, a small smile painting her lips for a moment.
-You will never hurt yourself again.
-I promise.
-And please, if you need help, if you need me, tell me. Iâm always here for you, darling. Always.
#lilia calderu#lilia x reader#patti lupone#avis amberg#avis amberg x reader#patti lupone x reader#agatha all along#we thank miss lupone simply for existing
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Apartment Story (Spencer Reid x BAU!reader)
We'll stay inside till somebody finds us, do what ever the tv tells us, stay inside our rosy minded fuzz.
My first time writing something like this, and i'm sure its not very good and there's room for sooooo much improvement, but i hope you enjoy nonetheless!
Summary: You've reached the groggy, grey winter months where nothing much usually happens, but this year is a little different. This year, you have Spencer Reid by your side. To combat the post-christmas blues and make some use of the last remaining weeks before you both head back to your desks at the BAU, Spencer attempts to find solutions for you both to remain as calm and content as you possibly can.
Tags: Spencer Reid x BAU!reader, fluff.
Word Count: roughly 789
You were roused by the sound of shuffling sheets beside you,and a temporary loss of warmth, before an arm reached itself under your side of the bedsheets to the small of your back. Eyes still heavy and closed, you nuzzled back towards the main source of heat - your own personal central heating system: Dr. Spencer Reid. Gently, you opened your eyes, head still resting against his chest, and peered up to be welcomed by his adoring smile.
"Good morning," Spencer whispered as he kissed the top of your head.
"Morning," you croaked, still squashed against his body, your breath against his neck making him giggle.
You open your eyes wider, this time gauging an impression of today's weather: grey and wet. just like everyday since the start of November, it seemed. This specific state of the weather was sure to weigh heavy on your heart until the end of March, when things would start to brighten up and look more alive.
"Hey, what's gotten you looking so somber?" Spencer inquired while turning your head towards him with his hand on your cheek.
"The weather! i just feel so trapped in such a monotone season. Eveything looks like it's been stripped of life," you lament into his caring eyes, a hint of worry working it's way into them. "You make me feel better, though. I remember once telling you that i think i chase the sun. It makes me feel far more alive and productive and full of ideas. Anyway, i came to the conclusion that you are my sun. Just being around you is enough to, for a while, help me forget about how much the winter months tend to weigh on me. So, thank you for that." You smile up at him while a faint flush settles over his cheeks, clearly bashful at such a - as he would put it - poetic metaphor.
"You're thanking me for being myself?" he chuckles.
"I suppose i am," you affirmed, leaning in to kiss him. He replied with a hum as he kissed you back, contentedly.
---------------------------------
You both spent your morning cuddling, reading and drinking tea (well, coffee for Spencer) and after the afternoon hit it's peak, the daylight seemed to be sucked away too fast for your liking.
Returning from the kitchen with two cups of tea occupying both of his hands (Spencer's new year resolution to only drink coffee in the mornings for a better night's sleep seemed to be going well, you thought) Spencer padded towards you in his fuzzy-sock clad feet, sitting beside you on the sofa and turning to you, thoughtfully.
"I think we should buy you a SAD lamp. Oh, and also stock up on puzzles, sudoku books, crosswords and other activities which will stimulate both of our brains. Well, I of course tend to these activities more than you- there's nothing wrong with that by the way! You enjoy more creative hobbies and i logical ones, but we could build puzzles together as i'm very, very bad at creative activities. Oh! I could also run to the pharmacy and get some vitamin c tablets. They'll be good for us to take in the winter," Spencer offers in a breathless frenzy.
You chuckle at his despiration "Are you still thinking about what i said earlier? Spencer, it's common to feel slightly more down in the winter months, i don't want you worrying about me too much!" you reply with a comforting smile, reaching out to take his hand in yours, squeezing it a few times as if to physically transmit your words into him.
"I know, i know. I just care about you so much and i'de hate for you to feel the weight of the shorter days wearing you down. I feel less motivated this time of year, too. But - not to steal your beautiful metaphor here - i think you might me my sun, too. Sunlight increases the production of sterotonin which helps improve mood and promote feelings of happiness, and spending time in the sunlight can reduce levels of cortisol in the body. You have the same affect on me."
"The science in your metaphor made that sound far more romantic," you giggle as you consider his words, Spencer gazing at you lovingly. "I think we will survive, love. We've got eachother, and our books, and yes if you like you can buy a bunch of brain stimulating puzzles," Spencer gazes downward shyly at your words.
"I think we've got an arsenal of things within ourselves to battle the winter blues away. Especially eachother." You end with, softly.
Leaning towards you, Spencer takes you in his arms. "I think you might be right." He mutters into the soft material of your shirt, holding you tightly.
#dr spencer reid#spencer reid#doctor spencer reid#fluff#one shot#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fanfiction#criminal minds#Spotify
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Sing me to sleep đ đ€
Pairing: Han Jisung x Reader Genre: Angst (with a bit of a happy end) Summary: You have a nightmare and your boyfriend Jisung comforts you the only way he knows how. Warnings: Depictions of a panic attack A/N: First fic of the year! Just a small drabble of an idea I had in the vault with a New Yearâs element (wanted to post this on New Yearâs Day but didnât have enough time to write đ
). Also such a sucker for angst but I barely write it.  Stray kids masterlist
~~~
You wake up breathing heavily, eyes pacing around your bedroom, head spinning as tears fall clouding your eyes. You look toward a sleeping Jisung and touch his arm, hand shaking as you try to find comfort. This wakes Jisung, and he quickly notices you in distress, pulling you closer to him as he strokes your hair.
âHey hey! Whatâs wrong baby?â Jisung asks in a soft voice.
âA-a nightmare⊠y-you were gone⊠left without saying anything⊠and nobody knew where you were a-and⊠people forgot about you a-andâŠâ you say in between sobs and shaky breaths.Â
Jisung seems to hold you tighter. âBaby itâs okay. It was just a bad dream. Iâm still here right?â
âY-yeah⊠b-but it felt so realâŠâÂ
âYouâve always had a crazy imagination. And I would never leave you without a good reason.â
You stay silent as Jisung tries to comfort you with his words. You calm down a little bit but tears still flow from your eyes and they donât seem to stop. Jisung notices you cling to him tighter, like itâs the last time youâll ever hold him.
âHey! I know whatâll make you feel better.â Jisung exclaims.
âW-what?âÂ
Jisung releases your grip from him and walks across the room to grab his guitar. He lays back on the bed next to you, holding the guitar on his chest.
âHow about I sing for you? Maybe itâll help you fall asleep!â Jisung suggests.Â
âI donât knowâŠâ you respond.Â
âCome on!! Give me a chance. Iâll play⊠the calmest song youâve ever heard, okay?âÂ
âO-okayâŠâÂ
âAlright! This is something I was working on last week with Felix. I think youâll like it!âÂ
Jisung starts strumming and singing a comforting song that would soon be added to the other unreleased songs heâs shown you. Something about the song speaks to you and you become more focused on his lyrics. You become completely entranced by the music. The softness of Jisungâs voice complementing the soft strokes of the guitar strings puts you back in your dream world. Jisung doesnât notice that youâve fallen asleep at first and keeps singing, hoping that his song will give you a better dream for you to wake up to.Â
That wouldnât be the last time Jisung sang your troubles away. Whenever you were stressed or on the verge of freaking out, you would ask Jisung to sing to you at night. Slowly, it became a regular occurrence to the point where you couldnât sleep without hearing Jisungâs soft voice.Â
But that was almost a year ago now.
Now, you find yourself at your friendâs New Yearâs Eve party, watching the fireworks outside as the clock hits midnight. It finally hits you that this is your first New Yearâs without him. But you try to focus on the bright lights of the fireworks.
BOOM!
You look around at the couples sharing New Yearâs kisses. You wish Jisung were here to share that kiss one last time.
BOOM!Â
Your mind races back to your big fight with Jisung. The one that would make your nightmare come true.
BOOM!
The back and forth yelling. It felt like you both were completely different people. Letting months of anger and resentment take over both of you. Realizing that the spark between you two was gone.Â
BOOM!
He left. Quietly. But not without saying goodbye and kissing your cheek with an âI still love you baby.â Thinking you were fast asleep. But you heard it. You felt it.Â
BOOM!
He kept that promise⊠he didnât leave without saying goodbyeâŠÂ
BOOM!Â
You wish you never said any of those things to him. You wish you two never had that fight. You wished Jisung was here with you right now telling you everything was okay, that heâs been right next to you all along.
BOOM!
But you know this isnât a dream. Itâs real and he is gone.
You tell your friend youâre not feeling well and catch a taxi back to your apartment. You get to your room and lay in your bed, crying yourself to sleep. You thought you would be completely over Jisung, but part of you still loved him no matter how hard you denied it.Â
You pull out your phone and start playing one of Jisungâs songs, hoping youâll fall asleep to one of them. Youâve been casually keeping up with his recent solo music and wish you dared to tell him how proud you were. All the late nights writing and singing to you were worth it.
You doze off listening to Jisungâs solo album when you faintly hear a knock. You open the door and see who it could be so late at night. But you stood at the door in shock as you couldnât believe what you saw.
âBefore you ask, this isnât a dream,â Jisung says, holding your favorite flowers and his guitar. âCouldnât spend New Yearâs without you. Let me sing you a song baby, just like old times!â
~~~
If you liked this leave a like, reblog, and/or comment! I appreciate it and thanks for reading!! General taglist is also open! Leave a comment if you'd like to be added
#stray kids#kpop fanfic#skz imagines#stray kids x reader#fanfic#stray kids imagines#han jisung#stray kids jisung#skz fluff#skz stay#skz#skz x reader#skz han#stray kids han#han jisung imagines#han jisung x reader#han jisung stray kids#stray kids fluff#skz angst#angst with a happy ending#light angst
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au batfamily idea
au batfamily idea where talia found out she was pregnant and decided to do the whole pregnancy term with bruce, maybe negotiated some terms with him (that ra's obviously had no plans of following). right so, bruce/talia fic. you can write out the nine months of pregnancy, do this however you want i dont care.
but then around seven to nine months into her pregnancy (you pick) something happens, rouge attack or ra's attacks her and she's badly injured. the doctors and bruce tell her she had a miscarriage/still birth (depends if it's past 24 weeks or not), right?
except, she didn't. almost immediately talia leaves with ra's. cut to bruce watching them leave
"are you certain about this, master bruce?" alfred asks over the comms.
"it's for the better, alfred." bruce mutters as he watches talia leave. "she would've made a terrible mother."
you can change that line all you want to fit with your fic, i don't care. from here this can go two ways. one: the bat-family way
damian spends his first 10 years with the bat-family. he grows up with bruce as his father so you can change his personality however you see fit. maybe he was robin post jasons death instead of tim or maybe he has his own vigilante name, point is he grew up with bruce and dick and jason and cass and alfred. either bruce convinces everyone he's adopted or damian stays hidden for his whole life (that'd mean homeschool and no vigilante title, all the other batkids would think it's totally fucked up and none of them except dick probably know where he's from).
somehow after he turns ten, talia finds out about his existence. this is a point where you can use jasons time at the league for explanation, maybe he mentions a brother while he's there and says he looks just like talia or some shit. or dont use him, whatever. back to talia, she finds out about damian and is like 'yo wtf' and obviously tries to get her son back.
she succeeds, faking his death to throw them off. she gets a good five years or so before someone finds damian and then it's just all hell and you can pick who he ends up with.
now for the second option. after bruce fakes talias miscarriage/still birth bruce thinks this kid will never be safe. if he's with bruce talia will always try to get him, and if he's with talia damian will never know peace and eventually be a capsule for his grandfathers body.
so, he gives him up.
damian bounces from orphanage to orphanage or foster home to foster home--whatever you want--until hes anywhere from 10 to 15. now this is where tim drake come in. he's 16/17 when damians 10 (that's what i normally go by) and tim catches some members of the league looking for something that seemed really important. no captured league members would utter a word, all killing themselves instead.
but tims tim and somehow found out their looking for a fucking child and he goes out to find this child and save him. maybe tim recruits his brothers idk, do whatever. once tim finds him he's like 'holy fuck that kid looks just like talia al ghul' and tim's actually thinking about backing off cuz clearly this is a family issue....
except. well, that kid is equally confused and he's clearly had a hard life and hey, he kinda looks like bruce! so suddenly tims on a mission with this kid (again anywhere from 10 to 15) and he's trying to save him from the league while also trying to figure out what the fuck is going on! and you know, he'll need some help from his family to crack that shit.
that one ends in a big battle bat-family vs the league of assassins and damian has no clue what's going on this whole time. great potential for damian and tim bonding too which i love. please, someone make this a thing.
if this is already a thing please lmk i want to read it so bad
anyone can take this and run with it, give credit though, and PLEASE give me the fic name.
#batfam#batman#dc comics#damian wayne#robin#tim drake#al ghul#ao3#batfamily#batman comics#talia al ghul#good mom talia al ghul#bad mom talia al ghul#bad dad bruce wayne#bruce wayne#tim drake and damian wayne#alternate universe#league of assassins#hurt/comfort#angst#angst with a happy ending#mentioned dick grayson#dick grayson#jason todd#cassandra cain#timothy drake#red robin#red robin dc#bruce/talia#duke thomas
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Hi Mere I don't want to imply anything but I'm worried that your new relationship stopped helping you be creative and put out updates. Is your fiance not letting you write? I'm concerned about you.
Look, i appreciate your concern and Iâm sure you have good intentions but let me set you straight.
I met my fiancĂ© through writing. we used to write together every single night. Theyâve been nothing but my biggest fan, my biggest supporter, the person I can turn to for honest and kind feedback. When I was writing Youngblood and I wrote a chapter I absolutely HATED it was them who encouraged me to rework it into something I was proud of and who didnât let me give up and just hate myself for it.
And when I said I wanted to stop writing for a while let me tell you there was a big silence and they gave me a look of horror and asked if I was okay because YEAH, itâs very unlike me.
But first I want to say, that just because you guys have known about my relationship for a little while doesnât mean thatâs as long as itâs existed. I was happily in this relationship when I was pumping out 3 chaps a week, and Iâm happily in it now that Iâm posting 0.
The honest truth is Iâm burnt the fuck out. I donât want to write because I have zero interest in it right now. It doesnât make me happy, Iâm not motivated or burning to do it like I used to be. I wrote nonstop through my last two years of college, through graduating, through working a terrible food service job post grad, living in constant dread of what came next. Iâm just burnt out. Iâve been pumping out jegulus nonstop since 2022, ofc I was going to lose steam and move away from it eventually.
Im just busy and tired! Iâm moving in a few months, I have a full time job now, I go to work at 8am and come home at 5 or 6 and I donât want to write. I want to spend time with my family or my friends or my fiancĂ©. In December I worked for 17 days straight without a day off, I needed a break! And when I want comfort and happiness I donât have to turn to writing to find it.
Iâm mentally at the best I have been in a very long time, and I donât need to write like someone has a gun to my head to cope anymore. I had a very unhealthy and obsessive relationship with writing. And I always joked when people asked how I wrote so much that it was mental illness. But it wasnât really a joke, I was unwell and coping with fanfic. So while Iâm sure some of you may be sad to see my writing slow, I hope youâre happy for me because itâs a good thing!! I want to heal my relationship with writing and I want it to be something I simply do for fun, not something to fill some hole inside of me.
So while Iâm sure you mean well, I just want to remind you guys that you see a very small piece of my life and my relationship. So Iâd appreciate not making assumptions đ©·
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How can I make it OK?
Arthur Morgan x reader
Summary : you're homesick.
gender neutral reader, no use of y/n, not explicitly romantic unless you wanna read it that way, 3K words
Warnings : swearing, mentions of suicide, panic attack described in semi detail, not the jolliest thing i've ever written
A/N : first post that's actually writing in 2025 ! wrote most of this on the train while listening to house in nebraska by ethel cain and more than this by wolf alice so yeah. also this isn't arthur heavy in the sense that it's reader rambling about being homesick mostly. to be read in a southern accent as god intended
Of all the places I have travelled with the Van Der Linde gang, I think this is my least favourite.Â
Living- or rather, camping- in the ruins of some plantation, bodies of the former owners stagnating in the pond. Sometimes I hear âem- the ghosts, in the walls, screaminâ. I know itâs my mind, playing tricks on me; but itâs harder to have that rational thought when youâre lying alone in the middle of the night, wind whistling through broken windows. Itâs not that I donât like having a roof over my head. Shit, everyone in this godforsaken gang is happy to have a real shelter from the weather, even one as flimsy as this house. So I shut my mouth, hunt as Iâm expected-which is what I am doing now, borrowed bow over my shoulder, quiver resting comfortingly between my shoulder blades.Â
Hunting is familiar. Back in the Grizzlies, where my daddy raised me, weâd go out any time of day, in any weather, hunt for the coming storms. Iâd do everything the way he taught me to- lay out traps, wait behind a boulder, bow in hand. It builds patience, he told me when I asked why the hell we didnât just track the damn animal, instead of waitinâ in the cold for it to find us.Â
Now, itâs not cold, and dear old daddy ainât here to help.Â
I left my horse hitched by a lake, with enough grass for him to be fed and well until I bring back something worthy of Pearson. Itâs near sunrise; already, the heat is uncomfortable; my skin is sticky, my clothes uncomfortable. Itâs moments like these that I long for the snow.Â
I wipe my forehead with the back of my head. Iâve been walking for a little while now, waiting for a pack of deer to pass by. Thereâs something that bothers me about killing them- maybe itâs their eyes, so big and brown, caught frozen as they stare at you. Or maybe itâs their resemblance to this little girl I knew, at a local village at the base of the mountain where I grew up.Â
I shake the thought of her big brown eyes and twitchy nose as I spot a herd of âem, grazing near a small stream. Thereâs enough light for me to count them- seven, big enough to feed us.Â
I get on one knee, like my daddy taught me. Notch an arrow in the bow, pull it back. One of the poor animals raises its head, looks in my direction.Â
Before I can hesitate, I let go, and the arrow flies; a fraction of a second later, it has notched itself in the animalâs throat. It falls; its friends, the rest of its herd (its gang, I think, almost laughing) scamper off, into the woods. I donât go after them. Pearson will have to do with this, and whatever herbs or mushrooms Iâm able to pick up.Â
The doe is dead by the time I reach her. I kneel. Pull the arrow from her neck; thick, sticky blood gets on my hands. I almost reach for snow, to clean it off; curse myself when my fingertips meet grass and mud. The doeâs dead eye stares up at me, brown and empty as the sky. I resist the urge to close them.Â
âSorry, sweet.â I whisper it as I hoist her up, put her over my shoulder. Sheâs heavy. I must be getting blood on my shirt- itâs a shame, because itâs my favourite colour, and Iâve just bought it.Â
I swallow any regrets I feel as I walk back to my horse, the weight of the doe uncomfortable against my bow and quiver.Â
Youâre the reason she wonât come home, a little voice whispers in my head. I stop, then, because my chest is tightening and I canât really breathe. I say something incoherent. The fields around me are empty- itâs just me and this doe.Â
I drop her into the mud and loosen my shirt, gasping for air. I want cold, I want crisp mountain air; not this thick, humid, barely-air that clogs my throat and makes my lungs heavy.Â
I dig my fingers into the mud and grass, as I would have done in the snow, back home. Home. What a weird thought. I catch the dead doeâs eye again, and thatâs when the tears come, thick and hot and nasty, blurring my vision. So stupid, I think, as I force myself to stare at her. She- no, it- is just an animal. She doesnât have a home, not the way I did. Do.Â
I think of crying out for help, but thatâs pathetic, and Iâm a lot of things, but pathetic ainât one of them.Â
I think I stay there, on my knees, fingers deep in the mud, for a long time- when my vision clears again and Iâve stopped gasping for air, the sky is clear, clear blue, no traces of sunrise left. If I focus hard enough on it, I can almost pretend Iâm back in the mountains.Â
I get up, teeth digging into my tongue to prevent any new feelings from resurfacing. Iâm not in the goddamn mountains. All thatâs left for me there is two frozen bodies deep beneath the snow, and a hut thatâs probably been raided or taken over by some other gang.Â
I pick the doe up, this time careful to avoid looking at her face. Its face. Itâs an animal, not my goddamn sister.Â
I make it back to my horse without another incident; strap the doe across his back and climb onto his saddle. His name is Coal, âcause of the colour oâ him- black and charcoal grey, a streak of white down his face.Â
âHey, boy,â I murmur to him as I flick the reigns. My voice is shaky, hoarse; itâs obvious that Iâve been crying.Â
Coal begins to trot back to camp. I think of changing direction, of going to Rhodes, clear my thoughts. But I gotta bring this back to Pearson, or heâll skin me.Â
The camp is still there when I return, which is a relief. I donât think Iâll forget the moment when I came back after a hunt and found everyone gone, everything burned to the ground.Â
I shiver at the memory and get off Coal. âIâll come ând fix your saddle later,â I say to him, scratching his neck. He grunts, in a tone I hope is affectionate. I remove the doe, put her back over my shoulder. Make it to Pearsonâs stand, where heâs angrily chopping vegetables.Â
âHey,â I say, dropping the doe in front of him. I angle her head- her eyes- away from me. âGot some meat.âÂ
âI can see that,â is Pearsonâs kind answer.Â
I ignore him and walk away again, into the derelict house weâve been callinâ home for the last few weeks. My room is on the top floor; I wish I shared it with someone, but I got lucky (Dutchâs words) and got my own, private room.Â
I tug off my bloodstained shirt and drop it on the floor. Thereâs nothinâ to be done about my trousers- theyâre the only pair Iâve got (the others have just been washed, and hang soaking wet outside) and I donât plan on walking around bare-legged.Â
I change quickly. Sit down on the bed, stare at the wall.Â
I donât know how long I stay like that; starinâ at the peeling wallpaper, trying to pretend itâs the same white as the snow I used to see out my window. Obviously, the pretendinâ donât work, because itâs not the snow, itâs a crumbling fuckinâ wall in a crumbling fuckinâ house. I stand, take a deep breath in (of hot, hot, humid, thick air), push it out. It ainât cleansing- I donât feel better once Iâve tasted the surrounding bogs- but itâs enough to calm my heartbeat, and make me feel somewhat human again.Â
For the rest of the day, I help around camp, doing stupid, mind-numbing tasks. I try not to think of the mountains, and how much better than this godforsaken swamp they were. People talk to me, and I answer, polite and all. I eat Pearsonâs stew, listen to another grandiose speech about Dutchâs plan (or, as far as Iâm concerned, concepts of a plan). I finally find a moment of quiet sitting on a log, staring out at the swamp. Not the prettiest sight; all brown and green, with hints of yellow dust.Â
Iâm alone for only a few minutes before I hear footsteps. I turn, and find Arthur approaching, taking his cigarette packet from his satchel. I shift on the log Iâm sitting on, making the split second decision that his company is something I want right now.Â
He sits next to me, silently. Offers me a cigarette (I decline with a shake of my head and a wave of my hand) then lights his own with a match. He stays quiet for a little while, blowing smoke from his mouth, tinting the world blue and grey.Â
Itâs strange, sitting next to him. He donât mind being quiet; seems to like my company well enough, âcause he keeps coming back here to smoke.Â
Heâs the one who found me, all that time ago, on a solo hunt in the Grizzlies. It was at the edge of the mountains, where it starts to get warmer; where the sun melts away most of the snow. Was from Blackwater, he said- I asked if I could go back with him. Promised Iâd leave âem all alone when I got there, I just needed a job, as far from my daddyâs corpse as I could get. Heâd said yes, maybe reluctantly.Â
Turns out, Iâd found somethin' better than a job. Not quite a family, but a gang, people to rely on, people to distract me from the emptiness created by my fatherâs death. I suppose itâs these people keeping me here, in this swampy nowhere, sweating my socks off. Here, Iâve got people- back in the mountains, Iâve got two dead bodies and an empty house.Â
My chest tightens again, and wordlessly, I take the cigarette from Arthurâs hand, take a long drag. I hand it back, still silent, and dig my fingernails into my knuckles.Â
âYou miss home?â Arthur asks me, his words marked by the smoke curling from his mouth. I take the cigarette from his fingers again, press it between my teeth, inhale âtill I can blame the burning in my eyes on the smoking rather than whatever has grabbed hold of me; whatever old, buried feeling Iâd thought long gone had chosen to make an appearance. Guess it must be more obvious than I thought, that Iâm feelinâ odd, âcause he clearly smelled it on me.Â
âI donât know, I guess,â I say, softly, fiddling with the dirty fabric of my trousers as I hand the cigarette back; as if I donât know the answer, as if I havenât spent half my goddamn life thinking about this. I exhale, blowing out smoke from my nose. âNever really thought about it.â The lie burns in my throat, so thick I can hardly breathe.Â
Itâs not the stability that I miss. The weather in the Grizzlies was nothinâ permanent, not in any sense- one minute itâs a blizzard, the next youâre standing staring at the bright blue sky, knee deep in snow. I guess itâs the wolves howling, itâs the comfort of a fire as wind rattles against the window panes; itâs even the way the stars look after three days holed up inside. Thereâs no one thing I miss or donât miss- I just know I miss it, so much that my chest tightens at the thought.Â
When my daddy got shot, three- no, four- years ago, I thought the one answer was to leave that place behind; pack up my clothes and go out into the Wild Wild West, make my own future away from the smell of his freshly dug grave, right next to my mamaâs frozen bones. And when I came across Arthur, and later his gang of gung-ho outlaws, who seemed ready to take on the world, I thought that was it- my life was set.Â
But I donât like the constant moving like I used to. It donât feel like adventure anymore; it feels like escaping, like weâre always running from something.Â
âI donâtâŠâ I hesitate, reach up to dig my nails into the dip of my collarbone, try to dig the feeling out, hold it up to the light to examine it. âI guess itâs different.â A veiled confession. Away from the Grizzlies (away from home) itâs hot, stiflingly so; I canât climb onto my horse without breaking a sweat. Itâs already too warm by the time the sun rises- clothes sticking to your skin uncomfortably, flies buzzing above, drowning in the smell of swampy nothingness as soon as your eyes open. I donât hate it- it has become familiar, but familiar in the way the weight of a revolver at my hip has become familiar; the way the constant paranoia that clogs my throat has become familiar.Â
âDifferent how?âÂ
Another pause, as I scuff the yellow dust ground with the toe of my boot. Different in a whole lotta ways, I want to tell him; even the colour of the sky isnât quite the same back home.Â
Home. I think of the snow as I stare at the yellowed leather of my shoes. Where thereâs snow and wolves and no people to shoot at you unless you really look for it.Â
âI donât know,â I say, even though my whole body knows; it courses through me, the knowledge that a few days ride away is the mountains, and the snow. âIt just is.â
The answer dissatisfies him, I think. âCâmon,â he says in that gruff voice of his. âYou gotta be able to find one difference between here and the goddamn Grizzlies.âÂ
ââS warmer,â I say, the words followed by a short, slightly forced laugh. âDonât snow as much.âÂ
He snorts, shaking his head. âAlright,â he responds, maybe a little condescendingly. âThink oâ anything else?âÂ
âYou got less wolves down here,â I add, after a few moments. I donât say that I miss the sound of them howling; that when I close my eyes, I try to picture it, try to pretend Iâm back there instead of here.Â
âAlright.â He says it kinder this time, like weâre getting somewhere.Â
âThe sky looks different.â I dig my fingers in deeper. He offers me the cigarette; I take it, repurpose the burning in my throat. The smoke flickers around me as I exhale. âItâs- clearer, up there. More blue.â Here, the sky is tinted almost yellow. It ainât ugly, but it ainât home.Â
He doesnât answer, now, staring out at the swamps. I donât know how he feels about this place- about Rhodes, and the foreignness of Saint Denis, with its factories and smoke and cobbled roads. I wonder if he misses home- if he ever had one to begin with. âI guess I do miss it,â I say, to fill the silence more than anything. âBut⊠I donât know, I donât think I wanna go back.â Alone is the word I donât add. I think- maybe- if I had the gang, my new family, Iâd go back to the Grizzlies. After we escaped Blackwater, and hid out in that abandoned town up in the mountains; that was the happiest Iâd been for a long time.Â
But alone isnât something I want to be. Not the way I was alone, the few weeks after my father passed- just me and the freshly dug grave, me and the wolves, me and the gun that killed him, sittinâ on the table, an unwanted temptation.Â
âI donât wanna be alone again.â It comes out soft, hoarse, pathetic, the words grating in my throat, like sandpaper on my tongue.Â
Itâs true. Yes, home is in the mountains; I know that now, when my chest clenches at the simple thought of the snow. But home is also with these people- with Arthur, and Mary-Beth, and Pearson, and the rest of them. Hell, even Kieran, the OâDriscoll boy, has become home, in a way. Home is not just the place where I grew up (the place where my daddy now lies); home is also the people that have become my family; who have embraced me so kindly and warmly. I know deep in my stomach that if I were to leave now, take a horse back to the hut, Iâd end up like my daddy, a bullet in my head and a gun in my hand.Â
He did it âcause he was lonely. So lonely that even I wasnât enough to stop him from pulling the trigger. Lived in the mountains his whole life, but he had my mama then, and his parents. I guess fifty years of snow and not much else can drive you insane.Â
My hand goes to my temple; I dig my fingers into the skin, right where I found the bullet in his head.Â
âYâwonât be,â he responds gruffly. Heâs finished his cigarette, and yet heâs not made any attempt to get up, leave me with my thoughts. I snort, wipe my mouth with the back of my hand.Â
âDonât know that,â I say. âWith the Pinkertons on our asses, ând all.â Itâs meant to be lighthearted, but it comes out quiet, rough.Â
âYeah, but theyâve always been on our asses.â He puts a hand on my leg; it engulfs my entire knee. âTell you what.â He hesitates, clearinâ his throat a little. Squeezes my knee. âIâll take you huntinâ, once a week- or twice, or less, if you want.âÂ
âI go huntinâ anyway,â I answer. âNot in the mountains, yâdonât.â My chest both tightens and loosens at the same time. I swallow; my heart is thumping in my chest. I put my hand to my collarbone again, digging my nails in. âCâmon, itâll do you good. Cold air and all that.âÂ
I know thereâs a deeper meaning to that. Cold air- heâs giving me the chance to go home, and not by myself. Even if itâs not for long, itâs enough- to feel the snow again, to hear the wolves. Maybe once Iâll camp overnight, ride back to camp in the morning. The idea fills me with hope- a feeling weâre all starved of, these days.Â
âReally?â Is all I manage to croak out.Â
âWhat, you donât wanna?â
I laugh, and itâs genuine this time. âNo, I- I wanna.â
âAlright then.â He gives my knee a last squeeze, then stands. I stand with him, smooth my shirt with the flat of my hand. âTomorrow then?â Tomorrow. Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. Iâd sing, if my throat werenât so damn tight. My eyes sting, and I wipe at my nose with my hand.Â
âThank you,â I say, quietly. He donât respond, but he nods, and I think maybe he smiles a little.Â
Tomorrow. Tomorrow Iâll get to take a piece of my new home to the place I grew up- someone I love, to the place that holds my heart.Â
I watch him walk away; and suddenly, the humidity donât feel so bad anymore.Â
#arthur morgan#red dead redemption 2#rdr2#arthur morgan x reader#red dead redemption x reader#bloodhoundsandplagues writes#very little mention of arthur actually#im sorry#this is just me projecting my vaguely homesick feelings#when home is a place but also a person who's not in that place#yk#argh#i miss my mum#happy new year tumblr#arthur morgan x you#arthur morgan x yn#arthur morgan rdr2#please indulge me#would you be surprised if i said this wasnt proofread
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Hello sorry to bother again I saw you doing yandere asks I wanted to ask how would the boys react if someone tried to still their s/o away from them hope you had a Christmas and have a happy new year
Hello dear let me just say you're never a bother! Love seeing returning askers even better when we're mutuals I get so excited every time I see a notif from one lol!!
There's so many ways to take this so I'm taking it as someone flirting with Darling on this one! The other ways I was considering was someone trying to "save" darling from yandere or another yandere possibly one of the other boys trying to kidnap mc from og yandere. I'll probably do the other ones at some point cause they sound interesting.
Also this bad boy deleted itself THREE times, had me ripping my hair out on the verge of tears. I kind of got carried away on underfells part and only decided to do 5/8 characters I write for which are Sans, Papyrus, Red, Edge, and Axe (the post was too long so I'm posting Axe separately) If you wanted to see one of the other three just let me know and I'll do my best to write them too!
ALSO ALSO IMPORTANT TRIGGER WARNINGS PEOPLE DONT READ IF THESE TOPICS WILL MAKE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE TW: Somewhat Graphic depictions of death and dying, Intense blunt force damage to head, Blood
Alright I'm done yapping y'alls eyes cross back to your regularly scheduled program! Hope you guys enjoy!!
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Undertale:
Sans:
Oh hoh this is interesting. He might not do anything at first just because he wants to see how this plays through. If you're uncomfortable he'll step in and "politely" tell the dude to fuck off. It doesn't really matter however it goes the person's fucked just for interacting with you with frankly disgusting intentions isn't it obvious your HIS? Really he's just trying to see if you know you're his and wants to see how you'll deal with the situation, to see if he's trained you well enough. Once you guys are walking away he excuses himself real quick and goes to "chat" with the person. Their barely breathing body is lying in a random alley way as sans teleports back to where he left you. He reassures you and tells you he just had to check on something at the lab real quick and shows you a fake text he sent himself requesting his help.
Papyrus:
He's fine at first! Politely informs the person that you two are indeed happily together and then gushes about your relationship for a bit. The entire time though something starts to creep in his emotions as the persons eyes barely leave your form. Something Papyrus does not have much experience withâŠ. jealousy. His words fade out as he takes in the person's gaze and he quickly excuses you guys and leads you away getting uncomfortable and upset with the thought of the person even looking at you anymore. He trys to get back on track and puts on a cheerful face for his darling but he can't get that disgusting person out of his head. How dare they look at you in such a ludicrously wanting way, trying to seduce you with their eyes. Vile. He loops back around tsaying he simply wanted to check out a store back the other way and keeps an eye out for the person. Low and behold there they are and he gently leads you into a store before walking off with the excuse of looking for something in the store. Leaves and approaches the person and chews them out telling them they need to do better and such. He won't hurt them no but he lightly threatens them in a friendly way only Papyrus can pull off. He leaves satisfied when the person's scared and promises to do better in life. He joins back up with you in the store and picks out a pretty outfit for you to try on as an excuse saying he was trying to find the perfect outfit for you.
Underfell:
Red:
You and Red were out shopping holding hands as you walked through the mall when a person breaks off from their friend group to come over and compliment you trying to start conversation. Red immediately tenses and glares at the person hoping to send a message across as his grip on your hand tightens. You politely tell the person you're already taken and they glance at Red in question before scoffing. Red snarls at them and lets out a low growl, he knows he doesn't deserve you that he's nowhere near your league but how dare this other person so blatantly announce it and try to plant seeds of doubt in your mind. The person backs up at Reds growl and rolls their eyes before walking off. Red watches them leave his eyelights drilling holes into the back of the person's head as they walk away he discreetly takes a picture of them. You gently shush him and lead him away as he continues to grumble and huff. Later on in the night he sends the picture to his brother and asks him to gather info on him to which Edge begrudgingly does. Red gets the dudes address and sneakily slips out of bed pressing a kiss to your forehead and making a pitstop at his toolbox to grab a hammer before he teleports as close as he can walking the rest of the way. Luckily (or unluckily in the person's situation) they have one of those stupid giant windows that look directly into the living room. He teleports inside and silently glares around the room before heading upstairs opening each door silently to look for their bedroom. Once he finds it he stalks inside and stands over the bed just glaring at the person for a few minutes. How DARE they even look at you, someone like this isn't worthy of even your presence. He raises the hammer and doesn't hesitates as he brings it down right on their temple claw side facing down with as much force as he can manage. There's a resounding crack and a loud scream of pain as the person wakes up disoriented, afraid, and in pain. Red growls and clambers on top of the person straddling their chest and pinning their arms down with his legs as he raises the hammer and brings it down with force againâŠ.and againâŠ.. and againâŠ. and again⊠and well you get the picture. By the time Red is done there's blood and brain matter spread everywhere. On the walls, soaking his clothing (he was smart enough to change into clothes he didn't mind burning), soaked into the bedsheets and dripping on the floorâŠ. And in the center of all that chaos Red ,still ontop of the body, chuckles his eye sockets twitching and blank as he takes in the bloody scene he just caused. His chuckles turn to manic laughter as he clambers off the body and paces around the room slightly. Luckily skeletons don't leave fingerprints or hair so really all he has to worry about is the murder weapon and clothes. He laughs himself serious and sighs as he takes in the scene again what a pain in the ass even dead this fucker is causing him problems. He doesn't bother to clean up only taking a few valuables after scrounging around to try and throw the police off (like that's gonna help with how brutal the death was ) teleporting into the woods he frequents to punch trees when he gets upset and burns his clothes and the items he can burying the ones that can't be burned. Then he teleports home and takes a nice long hot shower after he's done he puts on a pair of sweatpants and a tank before sliding into bed with you. He holds you close and pets your hair gently as he takes in your scent. He feels at peace the memories of what just happened slipping away as he falls asleep holding you.
Edge:
Edge and you were at a nice restaurant when the waiter made more than polite conversation with you while he was away from the table. Like the good little trained pet you are you immediately reported it to Edge upon him returning and he raises a brow bone as he listens to what the waiter said. What an ignorant fool flirting with you after seeing you and him together on a clear date. He chuckles softly and it sends a shiver down your spine as you watch the waiter return with the check Edge asked for. He's polite and courteous and pays before taking you home. Later on in the night he does a bit of research into the waiter who's name he remembered from his name tag. It takes forever but with the name and mental image of the person still fresh in his mind he's able to track down the person's social media accounts and from there their address and more personal information. He's not going to harm the person no, that would be a waste of his precious time and has to have so much preparation put into it. Edge is hardly threatened by the person in fact he finds the whole situation rather funny. Hilarious even that the person would dare flirt with you when it was obvious you're already the property of the Great and Terrible Edge. Edge is going to dig deep really deep and figure out all the embarrassing dirty or disgusting secrets this person has and expose them all to their friends and family anonymously as well as sending hateful, spiteful, and ignorant texts to important people in the person's life by weaponizing secrets and private information. Then he's going steal money from the person's jobs bank accounts and deposit it into the person's bank account to set them up for grand theft. Over the next few days Edge seems perfectly fine albeit on his phone and laptop more often. Unbeknownst to you he's just keeping an eye on the chaos that the person's life has descended into. Friends and family turning their backs, Losing his job, Being arrested on charges of grand theft and possible felony charges for it. Edge thinks the entire thing is hilarious and of course since you've been such a good pet recently and reported it to him immediately he rewards you with pampering and affection.
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Another reason these took so long is because I've been obsessively reading Making A Monster on ao3 and AHHHHHH hard recommend. Normally I'm not the best with named readers but this one is đđMWAHH Love the plot and characterization of the boys(and lets be fr I'm a sucker for any well written reverse harem undertale fic). If you guys have any recommendations for Undertale fics I'd love to hear them! I'm always looking for more to read lol
Also! Here's Axes version!!
#undertale fandom#undertale fanfiction#sans undertale#headcanons#underfell sans#sans x reader#underfell#sans x you#sans the skeleton#sans au#sans#papyrus the skeleton#papyrus au#papyrus undertale#undertale papyrus#papyrus#papyrus headcanons#undertale headcanons#general headcanons#my headcanons#underfell papyrus x reader#underfell sans x reader#underfell au#underfell papyrus#fell papyrus#fell au#fell sans#sadistic yandere#yandere tendencies#yandere
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truths, back again!
it's not even been a week into 2025 but it sure has been a whirlwind - my story truths has consumed a part of me and i've got to say this might be the quickest i've written something - day 6 and i'm writing Part Two already! you can find truths here where the new chapters are all uploaded and ready to be read!
and for those of you that haven't seen my last post about it, feel free to check that out, but in the meantime, i'll leave you with a little sneak peek at something coming up a little later in the story!
~ ~ ~
âHas he been bothering you for coffee for a long time?â AJ asks me as we start down the street.
âUmâŠâ I think. âSort of. Yes. Why?â
âExplains why heâs so touchy.â He shrugs.
âWhy?â
âItâs tough, trying to find a chance to get to know someone youâre interested in.â
âWhat?â I do a double-take. âDannyâs not- No- Is he?â
âSeems like it.â
âHang on.â I stop walking and grab his arm. âYou sound like youâre talking from personal experience.â
His lips twitch. âMaybe I am.â
My mind spins. He could be talking about anyone. His past. Anything. Not me. He canât mean me. I donât want to press further, itâs not my business, but my curiosity takes over and I just canât help myself. âHow would you go about tackling such a problem?â
âI wouldnât say Iâd tackle it. More like⊠Find a way to be with them without making it so blindingly obvious that youâre spending time together. Itâs difficult sometimes, but for the right person⊠Itâs worth it.â
I smile. His words are so sweet I think he might secretly be a Saint. âWell, whoever she is, sheâs a lucky girl.â And I hope she deserves him. I really do.
âI wouldnât call her lucky.â He murmurs, tucking his hands in his coat pocket. âSheâs more than that.â
More than I will ever be.
~ ~ ~
now for the tag list!
(p.s if you'd like to be included/notified too, interact with this post :) p.p.s im finally getting around to updating it, so bear with me :))
@humbly-a-doppelganger @imawholeassmood @frostedlemonwriter @yrndrgn @abditorywriting
@riveriafalll @lead-to-code @casualsuitturtle @floweryprosegarden @joeys-piano
@catwingsathena @godsmostfuckedupgoblin @nothoughtsjustmhaandotherthings @anaisbebe
@drchenquill @leahnardo-da-veggie @tiredpapergirl @pastelpinkhobbies @a-mimsy-borogove @the-letterbox-archives @corinneglass @darkluminosity @kuebiko-writing
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any tips for being in the broom closet/having to hide your altars
strict parents suckkkk
Khaire, Nonny!
My apologies for the extreme lateness of this ask. 2024 was a horrendous year for me, and I couldn't keep up with asks. ^^;;;
I would recommend taking a look at some subtle ways to worship deities which I have here in this post! It's pretty basic, and you may find some things that are helpful to you. Worship doesn't always have to be a fantastical show of faith or an in-depth ritual; you can show your devotion through "little" actions, such as wearing jewelry you associate with a deity or listening to music that reminds you of them. There's honestly a lot you can do without needing an altar!
If you DO want a physical altar, however, something I've heard of is keeping small altars spaces under the bed and/or in a shoebox - and yes, keeping it in the closet as well. It's discreet and allows for your worship spaces to be safely concealed with your parents being none-the-wiser. You can also keep a journal dedicated to your deity where you write poems, prayers, or draw for them; you could even tape or glue images of their statues, temples, and other things into the journal as an added show of offering. If you're worried your parents will read said journal, someone once suggested writing it like a diary but addressed to the deity (ex: "Dear Aphrodite" instead of "Dear Diary") and claiming it was made as a "fan" of Greek mythology or Greek mythology-based media (you could use this excuse for a shoebox altar as well). It's not the most amazing excuse ever, and it may still incur backlash, but I've been told it's been effective all the same. You could also keep an altar space in nature, or have nature BE your altar. For many people, nature is a great way to connect with deities, especially those with domains in it. Plus, nature is good for our well-being, so that's an added bonus! In the case of having an outdoor altar, however just make sure to never leave this outside that could directly harm the environment or wildlife!
Outside of this, I would recommend giving a digital altar a try. These are altars you maintain online, be it dedicating a Tumblr blog to that deity or creating a Pinterest board for them. I've also heard of artists who have a dedicated digital drawing space for their deity, drawing something new on the page every time they wish to give an offering! You can even hold spaces for your deities in video games, such as in Minecraft or Stardew Valley. I've seen people create altars there for their deities in games before, and they turn out to be pretty cool (one person even had an altar to Haides in The Nether)!
It may feel hopeless at times when you have to hide aspects of yourself, but know that there are solutions and ways to practice your faith in secret effectively. I'm sorry you've found yourself in these circumstances. đ« I hope these options are helpful to you and others! If anyone has other suggestions, please feel free to share in the comments and reblogs. I hope your 2024 treated you well, Nonny, and I wish you the best in 2025. Take care! đ§Ą
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