#i just don’t have the same wit or snappy humor as some of the other ppl here

[hinakyuu]

ever feel so unfunny :/

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 291: The Endeavor Pamphlet

Previously on BnHA: Dabi showed up atop Gigantomachia’s back and was all “you’ll never guess who I really am!” and the readers humored him and were all “who?” and he was all “TODOROKI TOUYA” and we were all “WOW └(・。・)┘ OH MY GOSH I WOULD NEVER HAVE GUESSED”, except for Shouto and Enji who were GENUINELY SHOCKED. Anyway so Touya was all “and guess what I’m doing right now!” and before anyone could even try, he was all, “STREAMING MY EMMY-NOMINATED MINISERIES ‘HELLO, I’M EVIL BUT ALSO TRAGIC AND SEXY, NOW LET ME TELL YOU ALL ABOUT MY DAD WHO SUCKS’’, THAT’S WHAT.” And everyone was all “oh my god” and Touya was all “ヽ(⌐■_■)ノ♪” for basically the rest of the chapter, and that’s pretty much it! Oh, wait, except for the part where he also doused himself in bleach in a fit of pure theatrics, which is actually pretty much the main takeaway from the entire chapter really because it was just wild af. ANYWAYS.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi introduces Baby Touya, the world’s most enchantingly sweet character, and is immediately all, “I sure can’t wait to tell you guys all about how his fucking jaw burnt off.” Thankfully he doesn’t (YET), and we cut back to the present pretty quickly, where Dabi explains how he took all of his brain cells that should have been used to stop him from pouring bleach over his head, and instead put them all toward his big brain plot of releasing an elaborate video detailing Endeavor’s various abuses and crimes, and even throwing Hawks under the bus as well because WHY NOT. He then leaps off of Gigantomachia’s back (like I said, no brain cells) all set to blast them with a Prominence Burn, only to be stopped by none other than THE LEGEND HIMSELF, MOTHERFUCKING BEST, PRETTIEST, NICEST, MOST OUTSTANDING MOTHERFUCKING JEANIST. Who’s no doubt outraged by the crime against hair he witnessed only moments earlier. GO GETTIM JEANY BOI.

so I haven’t had time to answer any of them because this has been the stupidest week, but I just wanted to tell you guys that I received no fewer than nine asks about Dabi’s hair. which, in a week filled with election memes and tumblr’s most cursed fandom briefly rising back up from the dead, is a pretty impressive feat for him if you ask me. like, I know I was making fun of it basically nonstop, but it sure did generate a lot of discussion so maybe I should rethink my opinions on Dabi’s PR strategies now, idk

anyway. it’s Saturday. time to catch up on this shit. let’s see how fucked the Todorokis are

OH NO HE’S CUTE

HOLY SHIT THIS IS TOO MUCH TO FUCKING PROCESS. I’M JUST TRYING TO ENJOY MY DAY HORIKOSHI, ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO TRAUMATIZE THIS POOR CHILD RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY SALAD

“thanks for being all right” the fuck

who allowed this child to be so cute. I’m serious. who signed off on this

how could a child this adorable possibly want to murder his equally adorable baby brother. please, your honor. there must be some mistake here

guess how prepared I am to read all about Touya’s tragic past. mm. that’s right. zero ready. none ready

anyway. TWO THOUSAND DEGREES LOLOLOL. NO TRACE OF A CORPSE HOW CONVENIENT. A PIECE OF HIS LOWER JAW BONE FFFFMSGHKLSh. LOVELY. LOVELY

LMAOOOOO

listen you guys. I just want to take a moment to appreciate that Horikoshi Kouhei did one of two things here. either (1) he planned it out FROM THE VERY START that Touya would be born with red hair Because Fire Powers, but would then have his hair turn white due to trauma, thus making the Dabi/Touya connection very slightly less obvious, although Let’s Be Real Who Are We Kidding. OR, (2) the anime got it wrong and gave him red hair, and rather than allowing this plot hole to continue to exist, Horikoshi took it upon himself to concoct this elaborate storyline and pretend it was never a plot hole at all! in which case I sure hope someone at Bones is sending him a VERY nice Christmas card this year. got this man sweeping up all your messes for you. you’re just lucky he has some sort of wild compulsion to address these things

anyways!!

FATHER AND SON. how sweet. :| still zero percent ready for any of this btw

STOP BEING CUTE

THIS IS RIDICULOUS. I’M SO MAD RIGHT NOW. HE IS THE SINGLE CUTEST CHARACTER IN THE ENTIRE SERIES, and do you even know how many other baby characters I’m betraying in order to say that?! baby Kacchan, baby Deku, baby Ochako, baby Shouto, Eri, baby Hawks. I’M LOOKING YOU DEAD IN THE EYE RIGHT NOW AND TELLING YOU THAT BABY TOUYA IS CUTER THAN ALL OF THOSE PLEBS. AND YOU’RE LOOKING BACK AT ME RIGHT NOW ALL “YEAH IT SURE IS A PITY ABOUT HIS JAW MELTING OFF THOUGH.” THAT’S IT, I QUIT THE SERIES

and Enji’s smiling at him. he’s so proud of him. but then Touya won’t be able to do it, and Enji’s gonna stop training him, and Touya’s gonna feel like a failure and keep pushing himself in order to try and win his dad’s affections back, because that’s all kids fucking want, all they want is just love, that’s fucking it, you couldn’t just give him that?? and then he’s gonna immolate himself fflkdlskfh THERE YOU SEE HORIKOSHI, I KNOW THE WHOLE STORY ALREADY, YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO THE WHOLE “SHOW THEM THE DEAD DOG” THING YET AGAIN YOU PIECE OF SHIT

OH SNAP THERE GOES THE TWIN THEORY. R.I.P.

BABY FUYUMI. PRETTY CUTE. NOT AS CUTE AS TOUYA THOUGH. HEY LOOK, NO REASON TO GET MAD AT ME I’M JUST STATING A FACT HERE

YEAH THIS IS GONNA GO REAL WELL OH BOY

I keep pressing the emergency stop button but this industrial tragedy machine just keeps on chugging along anyway, I’m pretty sure this thing is not up to code

:| I am so sorry sweet boy, Horikoshi is only getting started with you

FUCKING HELL WITH THIS NARRATION

but he wasn’t actually a child to you, he was just a little puppet child for you to live vicariously through!! and then you went and did the same fucking thing with Shouto afterwards and never learned your lesson until just six months ago!! fucking hell, Enji

so now he’s all “Touya is dead, that’s an unforgivable lie” fflkdhflk motherfucker does he look dead to you. if you really think that, tumblr and twitter have got a little over five years’ worth of archived theory posts to show you

oh shit Touya’s countering with “it’s an unforgivable truth”, which, damn. I actually think Horikoshi’s dialogue is one of his weaker points as a writer a lot of the time, but that comeback was snappy as fuck

actually guys, now that I’ve seen how ridiculously fucking cute baby!Touya was, I can almost understand why Shouto and Enji never put the pieces together before lol. any passing similarities would have easily been dismissed on account of he’d need to be at least 10x more adorable in order to get the full resemblance

OH MY GOD

NOW YOU SLEEP??? SO YOU POINT BLANK REFUSED TO PASS OUT WHILE YOU WERE BUSY MAIMING ALL OF MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS, BUT NOW THAT THERE’S AN OPPORTUNITY TO SEE YOUR REACTION TO THE “YOUR LIEUTENANT WAS SECRETLY RELATED TO ONE OF YOUR WORST ENEMIES THE WHOLE TIME” BOMBSHELL, YOU FINALLY DECIDE TO GET YOUR FORTY WINKS. I SEE

WOW DABI

I’M SURPRISED YOU DIDN’T ALREADY HAVE YOUR ANCESTRY.COM RESULTS PRINTOUT READY TO FOLD INTO A PAPER AIRPLANE AND ZOOM ON DOWN TO HIM

LOL NEVERMIND

gotta say, so far The Endeavor Pamphlet is just about as spicy as I could have hoped

(ETA: Natsuo’s face as he watches his beloved dead brother come back to life only to literally and metaphorically set everything on fire in one fell swoop is :/. why must you do this to me Natsu. can’t you see I’m trying to throw a Welcome Back Jeanist party here.)

HAVE YOU READ THIS?! TODOROKI ENJI ABUSED HIS OWN HEIR, AND DABI WROTE IT DOWN RIGHT THERE

WELL HE’S NEVER GON’ BE NUMBER ONE NOW / NEVER GON’ BE NUMBER ONE NOW / THAT’S ONE LESS THING TO WORRY ABOUT / THAT’S ONE LESS THING TO WORRY ABOUT

btw I neglected to mention this last week, but yes I do recognize and appreciate that this is Can’t Ya See-kun himself whom Horikoshi has chosen to be the face of this existential crisis which the general public is about to experience. rip CYS-kun

OOF

excuse me. putting aside the implications of Dabi sharing this context-less murder video of Hawks with the entire world for a moment, I just have to pause for a sec here, because when exactly did he get a chance to edit this all in?? complete with voiceover that seamlessly ties in with the prerecorded footage of him with DNA test results sans shirt?? you’re telling me this motherfucker, with all the smoke that was in the room thanks to his own quirk, somehow got a PERFECT SHOT of the PRECISE MOMENT when Hawks drove his feather knife into Jin’s back, using his MAGIC CAMERA THAT HE I GUESS HAD THE ENTIRE TIME IN THE POUCH RIGHT NEXT TO HIS BLEACH BOTTLE, and then immediately somehow got this very next shot as well FROM AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT ANGLE

ALL THE WHILE IMMEDIATELY RUNNING THROUGH SCRIPT REVISIONS IN HIS HEAD, WHICH HE THEN PROCEEDED TO RECORD... WHERE, EXACTLY?? WITH SKEPTIC, WHILST RIDING ON MACHIA’S BACK??

AND THIS IS ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF???

and this after I just wrote that whole long paragraph positively GLOWING about this man’s ability to plug up a plot hole. jfc. just scratch out every damn word I said lol. just forget all of it

are you fucking kidding me, the footage was from the cameras Skeptic planted on Hawks??

that’s... actually... okay you know what, it still doesn’t make any sense in the slightest, but the determination to address it nonetheless... just, dammit... I feel like I’m constantly at war with myself over whether or not I want to shake this man’s hand or slap him lmao. whatever, then!!

anyway, since Shouto and Enji can’t actually see the damage that Touya is dealing to the hero industry even as they speak, Touya is taking it upon himself to give them the highlights

I think it’s a testament to how much Endeavor cares about Hawks that he managed to zero in on that comment even amidst all the craziness of his eldest son returning from the dead to announce how he’s been carefully plotting their destruction for years and years. like, he heard “Hawks” and his face immediately went like that. you think he’s worried that Dabi did something to him? because he’d be right to worry lol

so the Endeavor Pamphlet narration is now explaining all about how Hawks totally killed the Number 3 Hero Best Jeanist as well! yep... he sure did... totally...

OH MY GOD WE’RE CUTTING TO HIM AHHHHH

Hawks, that is. lol. not Jeanist. NO, JUST MY POOR HALF-DEAD WINGLESS BABY SON

NOOOOO HIS LITTLE WING STUMPS. BUT SOMEHOW HIS FACIAL HAIR IS STILL INTACT. OH TO BE AN ANIME PRETTY BOY BEING SET ON FIRE. “HEY, TAKE IT EASY, WATCH THE FACE”

EXCUSE ME WHAT

interesting! we suspected as much, I think, with the clues that Ending dropped, and the little flashback right after the name reveal. still not clear how Dabi found out about it though!

looooool okay here we go, breaking out the heavy-handed holier-than-thou shit now

you know, I do find it interesting how trying to model themselves after All Might’s noble Symbol of Peace image has kind of ended up being the heroes’ undoing here. like, I could write a whole essay on this, but what it basically boils down to is that they were all trying too hard to be perfect. All Might went out there and did his thing and was amazing, and so the powers-that-be built an entire system centered around this seemingly-infallible person, and they acted like the system was infallible as well. and so most of the population ended up becoming complacent over the years, and meanwhile the people who were unfortunate enough to fall through the cracks understandably wound up disillusioned and perceiving the heroes as these false idols

anyway, but I think one positive takeaway from this is that the new up-and-coming generation of heroes represent a breakaway from that system. like, imo what we’re witnessing is the downfall of the Perfect Hero, and the rise of the imperfect hero. and this new generation doesn’t shy away from their failures or pretend like they never happened. they pretty much can’t pretend, because their failures are all right out there in the open for everyone to see. Bakugou Katsuki, just to name one example off the top of my very biased head, has had his own personal character journey basically play out right in front of the media’s eyes. his humiliation at the sports festival, his kidnapping by the League, and all of the fallout afterward. this isn’t someone who can ever go out there and convince the world that he’s perfect. but what he can do, instead, is show the world that he’s trying. that he’s trying with everything he has to do his best, to be the best. rather than this untouchable godlike image, it’s instead the image of someone painfully human who is nonetheless striving with everything he’s got to keep moving forward, flaws and all, and work his way to the top

and ultimately I think that’s going to be a much more positive image to send out to the world when all’s said and done. because rather than merely inspiring awe, heroes like that inspire people to take action themselves. or at least that’s what I hope! and not just Bakugou, but the others as well. we’ve got Shouto, whose own personal trauma is being aired in front of the whole nation even as I sit here ranting. we’ve got Deku, who cries at the drop of a hat, and who fought to become a hero despite being quirkless (and I think it’s only a matter of time before that eventually becomes public knowledge as well). tl;dr because I’m getting way too long-winded here, but these kids have effectively been humanized in a way that the old generation never was, and I think that’ll go a long way towards building trust between them and the people they’ll someday be protecting, and inspiring the next generation in hopefully a much healthier way

anyway so where were we. ...oh yes, Dabi was explaining that heroes only protect themselves, and is presumably building up to his grand conclusion of “therefore you should all just let the villains take over and burn down the world”

omfg. YOU GUYS

DOES CAN’T YA SEE-KUN’S SHARK FRIEND ACTUALLY CALL HIM “CAN’T YA SEE-KUN.” HE HAS A NAME YOU KNOW!! UNLESS HE LEGALLY GOT HIS NAME CHANGED TO CAN’T YA SEE-KUN. OH MY GOD

ALSO, IS THAT CAN’T YA SEE-KUN CRYING IN THE BOTTOM RIGHT THERE OMG. GIVE THIS CHILD A HUG. EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU’RE DOING RIGHT NOW AND HUG HIM

BAKUGOU IS BARELY HANGING ON THERE LOL. GOTTA STAY CONSCIOUS... SO MUCH TEA BEING SPILLED... FOCUS... CONCENTRATE

IIDA’S ANGLING HIS HEAD IN A WEIRD WAY, LIKE DUDE. LOOKING SUSPICIOUSLY SNUGGLY THERE. MMM THESE IIDABAKU CRUMBS

HADOU IS ALL “WHAT EVEN IS ACTUALLY GOING ON” LMAO

LASTLY, POOR SHOUTO OMFG. WHEN YOU’RE ALL FINISHED HUGGING CYS-KUN THIS CHILD NEEDS YOUR ATTENTION!!

so now Dabi’s leaping off of this ninety-foot-tall gargoyle man like that’s a normal, smart thing to do. unless he can fly too now? saw his dad doing it back at Fukuoka and was all “hmm”

OH MY GOD SOMEONE TELL ME RIGHT NOW WHAT WORD SHOUTO IS USING TO ADDRESS ENJI, THESE TRANSLATIONS LOVE TO MESS WITH MY HEAD

ENJI GET MOVING DO YOU NOT SEE THOSE TEARS!!! SNAP OUT OF IT YOU BIG TREE

AHHHHH

OH KACCHAN YOU WOKE UP A LITTLE MORE THERE, HUH

lol he and Deku both look so determined but they’re basically sitting ducks. their “oh shit” faces do look remarkably like their “TIME TO SWING INTO ACTION” faces but don’t be fooled, they have one good arm and about six pints of blood left between the two of them. looks like this one’s all on you Shouto

-- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH --

BAH GOD... WHAT’S GOING ON HERE... THAT’S BEST JEANIST’S MUSIC

y’all. can’t even talk right now, my brain has completely shut down lol. just. ...

  °˖✧◝(￣▿￣)◜✧˖°

[godzillagirl-14]

Wish Upon an Idol (Ch. 4)

Chapter 4 

Pairing: ot7 x reader 

Summary: The Bangtan boys have the ability to grant wishes (unbeknownst to you, the brand new addition to their friend group) So when you jokingly wish you had superpowers to “help the world in a way you knew how” what happens when wake up the next day with extraordinary abilities? 

Warnings: Drama, angst, a lot of action, smut, and a bad attempt at being humorous. 

Warnings for this chapter: Angst - anxiety attacks, reader is implied to be bisexual, crying, self doubt, reader is very frustrated- steamy make out session  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Word Count: 4,945

Taglist: @mischiefmakerliesmith5​ @snowythellama​ @namjoonsslutakakoreanmanswhore​ (If you want to be tagged just let me know) :) 

Hope you enjoy! 

You were angry. 

So so fucking angry as you stormed down the street. Your body temperature was skyrocketing and you felt something animalistic deep down in your core that made you want to turn on your heel and tear your boss apart. 

No. That’s not what these powers are for. 

Nodding along with your thoughts you tried to calm yourself, to will away the sparks at your fingertips, and to slow down the erratic beating of your heart. You were aware that many people had watched you break Jaehyun’s nose, watched you storm out of the cafe with you creative choice of words.

Scrub the leeches out of the devil’s asshole. You gave yourself some props, you got your point across that you would never want to be with someone who constantly disrespects your boundaries, even after you had told them to stop. Your heart was already taken anyway. 

What would the boys think? How would they react? 

You wondered what the boys would have done if they had witnessed you throwing that ferocious jab at your boss. Would they be proud that you finally stood up for yourself? Would they be disappointed? Would they regret giving you powers in the first place? 

Your heart dropped at the thought. Maybe your temper was too short for these powers. One wrong move and you could ruin someone’s life. Letting out a frustrated huff, you turned into a nearby alleyway. Your frustration and anger were building, leaving you feeling like a walking furnace. Leaning against a brick wall, you closed your eyes and thought of ways to cool yourself down. 

Icebergs, Antarctica, glaciers, ice cold water... Truth be told, you just wanted to find the nearest lake and plunge into it. That would help you clear your thoughts and help your get back to your neutral state. 

Pressing your cheek up against the cool surface of the building, you almost moaned out loud at the relieving sensation. Just a few more moments and you can walk home with a semi-clear head. 

“Well, isn’t this a pretty sight,” Ah shit. “What’s a pretty little thing doing out so late by herself?” un-fucking-believable. Rolling your eyes you turned your gaze to the voice at hand, sizing him up, doing very little to hide your agitation. 

“It’s 4:30 in the afternoon,” His eyebrows shot to his hairline at your snappy remark before he laughed coolly and you wanted nothing more than to swipe that smirk clean off his face. He reminded you of Jaehyun, just from his body language. It made you heat up all over again. 

“No need for hostilities,” he responded, slyly. “Just wanted to make sure you were alright. I was worried.” he placed him hand over his heart in an attempt to make him look more genuine, but you could see right through him. 

This guy’s bullshit smells worse than Jungkook’s sweaty gym socks.

“Oh, I’m sure you were,” you rolled your eyes, pushing yourself off the wall. “I appreciate the kind gesture, but if you could be so kind as to leaving me alone, that’d be fabulous.” just as you were about to walk out of the alley and continue your path home, a hand grabbing your arm stopped you. 

“Hey, wait a second!” 

You felt that if you clenched your teeth any harder, your jaw would break. 

“Let go of my arm.” It was taking everything in you to not rip this stranger a new one. You were completely on edge, frustrated to no end, and wanting nothing more than to go home and neutralize your nerves. It was rather obvious that your powers were based off your emotions, so now it was important to make sure you weren’t feeling too much negativity to cause serious damage. 

The stranger didn’t listen and if you weren’t overheating before, you definitely were now. Your face felt extremely flushed and uncomfortable. Your ears were ringing like a hot tea kettle and your heart was pounding just enough for the constant thump to hurt and hinder your breathing in the slightest. You felt the sweat on the back of your neck slowly trickle down and settle at the small of your back and your hands felt just as clammy. Too focused on not maiming this annoying stranger, you didn’t even realize he was still talking until you forced yourself to stop paying attention to your body in hopes that would distract you long enough to get away. 

“Well, let me at least get your numb-” 

“No.” 

He blinked at you, frowning and you leveled his gaze with yours, hoping the pupils weren’t engulfed in glowing white. “Let. Go.” your words were deadly calm, despite your mind screaming at you to just grab him and toss him into oncoming traffic. No need to get too violent. 

Things were getting too dangerous now as you felt the palms of your hands start to burn and you looked, unclenching your fist to reveal red palms and small sparks dancing along the lines of your fingers. 

The jerk continued to stare at you before his frown turned to a scowl and his grip on your arm tightened to the point it kind of hurt. The feeling of anger and fear quickly unlocked your fight or flight instinct and you were soon swinging your hand up to smack him across the face. Short and simple to allow you time to get away, or so you thought. 

What you didn’t expect was for him to catch your wrist and twist it, rendering you unable to use your hands and for your heart rate to kick up like it just took eight shots of pure caffeine. Natural instinct along with your powers kicked in like no tomorrow, and soon you found yourself kneeing the guy in the groin a little too hard, effectively making him release one of your hands. Not taking into account of how hot your palms were, you brought butt of your palm up and into his chin, knocking him off his feet and releasing your other hand. 

His cry of pain would have been satisfying had you not been freaking out so badly, seeing the blistering red mark on his chin and neck. You had burned him. 

Bringing your palm up to your cheek, you hissed at how hot your hand was, trying and failing to calm your breathing as you turned and hauled ass out of the alley, knocking into some people as you went. Your mind was working overtime, making sure to not use too much of your enhanced speed, yelling at you to use more of your agility so you wouldn’t bulldoze anyone else down, and making sure to not think too much in fear of triggering your elemental powers. 

This was all just too much. You could hear every car horn, every heartbeat of the people you passed, vision blurring and focusing on all the wrong things, ears ringing, hands burning. Too much. Too much. Too much. 

It’s a wonder how you managed to make it to your door in one physical piece while your mind felt like it was going to implode on itself. 

                                                     ~~~

Taking the door off its hinges would have been impressive to Seokjin, had he not seen the state you were in as you walked through the threshold. There you stood, the disconnected door in your hand, your chest heaving up and down like you had just run a marathon, and sweat dripping down your temple and onto your neck. Your eyes looked cloudy, unable to focus on anything and if Jin had looked closer, he would have saw the rapid movement of your pupils shrinking and dilating in a desperate attempt to lock on something without your vision blurring seconds later. 

“. . . (Y/n)?” Standing from his spot on the couch, he stepped into your line of sight and your heart began to pound even louder in your ears as you saw him getting closer. 

His lips were moving but you couldn’t hear a single word. The sound of your erratic heart beat was driving you insane. Everything was too loud, too hot and Jin was suddenly way too close to you, reaching out to try and grab your hand that was most certainly hot enough to burn him. “No!” you snatched your hand away, cradling it to your chest. Jin held his hands up in surrender, moving slowly so as not to startle you too much. 

“Give me your hand,” he stated, softly making sure to not extend his hand too fast. He looked on patiently as he watched you frantically shake your head. “No, I-I’ll burn you. I can’t- I just- I don’t-” Moving away from him you began pacing back in forth, rubbing at your face as if the skin agitated you. 

“God, everything is too hot!” you screamed, before your clothes abruptly burst into flames. Seokjin screeched, jumping back so as not to get burned, staring in disbelief as you just . . . stood there as the fire ate away at your clothes, until there was nothing left, leaving you as naked as the day you were born. You were scared, so scared to the point that you didn’t care about the fact that you were standing stark naked in front of Jin, or the fact that anyone in the hallway could literally walk past and see you as well. 

Looking up, Jin saw the way your lip trembled, saw the way tears formed at the brim of your eyes, saw the way your hands shook. The shaky breath that was exhaled from your lips made his heart break, watching as the first tear streaked down your cheek, followed by another and then another until you crumbled down on your knees, your face buried into your hands, sobs wracking your entire body. 

Jin watched on, shocked into silence by the sudden outburst before his face softened into a look of sympathy. He cautiously made his way over to you with the same carefulness you would give to a frightened deer. He lowered himself down until he was on his knees in front of you, regarding the way your shoulders shook and how you were trying and failing to even out your breaths. Lifting his hand up, he intended to grab your wrist, but because of your enhanced senses, you were able to flinch away from him. You were still too hot. 

Softly calling out your name was met with no reaction, but he knew you heard him. You didn’t want to look at him. You were scared and ashamed, the events of today felt like they spanned an entire week. You were so tired. So when Jin called out to you again, you peeled your hands away from your face and was struck with the sheer ethereal beauty that was Kim Seokjin. You were awestruck. 

Going for a different approach, he simply held his hand out to you, giving you the choice of whether you would take his hand or not. You stared at his hand as if it were some sort of foreign object before looking back up at his face and shaking your head. “No,” you whispered, fresh tears streaking down the (s/c) skin of your cheeks. “I’ll burn you.” 

“No, you won’t.” Was his delicate reply. He wanted nothing more than to wrap you in his arms and comfort the tears away. Whisper sweet nothings into your ear until you were finally able to feel okay again. But he knew that if he did that right now, things would only erupt into chaos. Baby steps. 

“I trust you, (Y/n).” 

Looking back up at his face, studying his features, focusing on him. Only him. He was there for you and your heart began to beat faster. Taking a deep breath, you looked back at his awaiting hand, slowly extending yours. Pulling back when you felt his skin against yours, only to realize he hadn’t flinched away from you. You knew your skin was hot, probably even unbearably hot, but he didn’t show any signs of discomfort other than a slight clenching of his jaw. 

After he helped you stand up, he still held onto your hand as he led you into the bathroom, gently guiding you into the bathtub before sitting down behind you. Had you been more clear in the head, you would have asked him why he was still in his clothes. 

Leaning forward, he turned the water to cold, watching as it pooled around you both, looking on in disbelief as the water immediately began to evaporate as soon as it hit your skin. He then turned on the shower head, feeling the cold water cascade over the both of you, hearing you sigh in relief and watching your tensed body finally relaxing. You leaned back into his touch as he wrapped his arms around your shoulders, rubbing the skin in soothing circles. Reaching up, you grabbed his hands, squeezing them gratefully and relaxing into his chest. 

You stayed like that for a while; in complete silence with cold water flowing down from the tops of your head to the tips of your toes. Rubbing at each others knuckles, as a way to acknowledge one another without having to actually say anything. You’ve never been this intimate with him or either of the boys before, letting him cuddle in the bathtub with you, let alone him seeing you naked. Sure there would be relaxing sessions on the couch while watching a movie, but for it to get this far, was truly mind boggling. You were much more comfortable around other women, it seemed much more natural to be intimate around them, granted this did feel nice and it was helping you calm your nerves that just moments before made you take out an entire door. These past few days have been absolutely insane. 

You remembered what the boys had said; if you didn’t want the powers and responsibility anymore, all you had to do was wish them away. But even as you think about the events that occurred today, and the similar events that might occur in the future, you realize that you still wouldn’t give up these powers. What kind of impression would you have of yourself if you just gave up just because some days are harder than most. You wouldn’t be able to look at yourself if you gave up so easily. You had to keep fighting. 

You both stayed in the tub until you had finally cooled down and started shivering from the cold water. Stepping out of the tub, you turned to Jin, only to see his clothes completely soaked. You looked at him curiously but he only smiled at you before beginning to peel his shirt off. 

Eyes, widening and face reheating, you tried your hardest to keep your eyes trained on his face and damn near popped a blood vessel when he looked at you and smirked. He even had the audacity to wink at you. Good to know his playful attitude was intact. Huffing out a breath, you crossed your arms over yourself to try and keep yourself warm. The thought of trying to use your powers to regulate your body heat sounded absolutely atrocious with how you were so mentally tired, so you opted for the old fashioned way. You turned to reach for a towel hanging on the rack just as Jin pulled his pants down, your heart rate picking up to match the speed of the flash. You felt another shiver run down your spine when you finally wrapped the towel around your body, a reminder that you were in fact freezing your ass off and needed to be put in some warm clothes immediately. 

You felt like you were going to get whiplash with the way your body was trying to get used to your powers. First you were so angry to the point you burned your clothes off, and now, you were freezing to the point where you were desperate to have clothes back on. You grabbed another towel and turned back around to hand it to Jin, who had been staring at you intently, noticing the way your body reacted to the cool air. After grabbing the towel and wrapping it around his hips, he gently grabbed your hand and led you to his room. You were a little confused at first, wondering why he wasn’t leading you to your room so you could get dressed, but then realized that he might be letting you use his hoodie. You almost started skipping behind him in excitement as out of all the boys’ hoodies to steal, you loved stealing his. 

There was something about Jin’s hoodies that were just extra cozy. If he had noticed your change in demeanor, he didn’t comment on it as he opened his door to his room and let you in first. Walking in, you immediately sat yourself down on his bed, hugging the towel close around your chest to keep it from falling and awkwardly crossing your ankles in an attempt to appear more casual. You dropped one of your hands to run it along his comforter. It felt warm and soft and it caused goosebumps to travel along your arms and legs due to the texture against your palm. As your hand glided back and forth against the blanket, you wondered how you were going to explain this entire situation to Jin and the rest of the boys without them thinking that giving you these powers was a mistake. 

Hey guys, I quit my job by breaking my boss’ nose because he wouldn’t stop groping me and while I was walking home, some creep tried to hit on me and I ended up burning him after he tried to grab me. Oh and also, we need to look into getting a new door because I accidentally hulked out on it trying to get into the apartment, and I spontaneously combusted because I was in the middle of a panic attack and Jin saw me naked! :D 

Yeah that conversation is going to be... quite interesting. You internally cringed, wondering how you were going to muster up enough energy to even start that conversation. 

Too lost in thought about the entire ordeal, you didn’t notice Jin rummaging through his drawers until he had set out a hoodie and pair of boxer briefs in front of you. The hoodie looked like it could swallow Jin whole, so you immediately knew that you would be swimming in the article of clothing before you even unfolded it. You were grateful for the size though because as soon as you had put it on, you were immediately engulfed in warmth and you exhaled as your cold body was finally able to start relaxing. 

Jin smiled at you as you attempted and failed to get rid of the sweater paws that were forming around your hands and led you back out to the living room. By now, the sun was close to setting and the door to the hallway was still very much laying on the floor instead of being on it’s hinges. You groaned as you sat down on the couch, Jin sitting down next to you and setting your legs on his lap. 

After a few beats of silence with Jin massaging the muscles of your calves and you fiddling with the hem of the hoodie, you finally looked up to see him looking at you. “How are you feeling?” he asked, searching your face for any distress. You opened your mouth out of instinct, ready to deliver your answer as if you were on autopilot. 

“I feel fine.” 

He raised his eyebrow at you, telling you that he didn’t believe you for a second. “Come on, (Y/n), we know you better than anyone. You can’t lie to us. You can’t lie to me.” Gently grabbing your chin and making him look at you made you puff out a breath. Rolling your eyes, you moved away from his hand and leaned back against the couch. 

“I don’t- I mean, I don’t really know where to start,” you shrugged your shoulders, trying to rack your brain for the right words to say. “I broke my boss’s nose because he kept trying to advance on me even after I said I wasn’t interested. He kept saying that my “no” was secretly a “yes”. He wanted the chase, it was all like some fucking game for him. I told him no again, and when he grabbed my arm, I punched him in the face.” 

Jin nodded, listening intently and waiting for you to continue. You wanted to leave it at that, but you knew he wouldn’t let up until you had gotten everything off your chest. “I walked out after we had yelled at each other. I had some pretty.... unique parting words for him, but then I was walking home and I was just so angry and everything was suddenly heating up and going in and out of focus. So I stepped aside to try and calm myself down, but then this guy tried to hit on me. He was so creepy, and he had grabbed me, but I had burned his face. I just-” you didn’t realize how you were still worked up about the situation as you choked on your words. 

“I was just so scared that I would hurt someone innocent and I was so angry I couldn’t even see straight which made me even more scared and I just wanted to get home but then that happened,” you gestured towards the broken door and sniffled, not realizing you had started crying again. Luckily your body seemed too exhausted to overheat and you were grateful when Jin pulled you into his lap and held you close. 

Burying your face into his neck, you let out the tears you had been holding back all day, finally being able to let your body sag after all the tension was released. Jin soothingly rubbed your back, pulling you to face him after you had finished letting everything out, and wiping away at the tears that slid down your cheek. Your face and eyes probably looked puffy from all the crying and you felt like you looked crazy, but it had only made Jin fall in love with you more, letting him see you be so vulnerable and being able to comfort you. 

He kept his hand on your cheek and watched as you leaned into his touch closing your eyes and sighing. When you were able to stabilize your breathing, you finally opened your eyes and were once again struck by the pure beauty that was Kim Seokjin. 

“You truly are beautiful, Seokjin,” 

You could have cringed at the way your voice whispered those words, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to nitpick the way you sounded right now. You felt your ears begin to burn after he had remained silent, too lost in your self doubt to see how red his ears and cheeks were turning. You went to move off of his lap, intent on going to your room to lay down, but were stopped when you felt his hand on your cheek become firm to keep you in place. He took a second to look at you, from you (h/l (h/c) hair, to the way you hiccupped trying to recover from crying so much,  to the redness that surrounded your (e/c) eyes to the way left over tear streaks smeared on you (s/c) skin. He felt like he had spent thousands of years with you as well. 

“I know,” 

You couldn’t hold back your laughter even if you wanted to. Your body shook with the force of your laugh. Burying your face in his neck again, you let his laugh fill your ears while you felt his hands massaging your back and leg. You stayed like that for a while, the only noise filling the room being your occasional sniffle and the little hitch in the shakiness of your breath from still trying to recover from your crying session. You still felt upset and you had no doubt that one small thing could possibly trigger another crying session, but right now, you were content with keeping your thoughts empty and just listening to the sound of Jin’s heart beating clearly in your ears. 

You were close to dozing off in his lap when he finally spoke up, making you tune out of your little bubble. 

“For what it’s worth, you are the most beautiful girl I’ve laid my eyes on,” You couldn’t tell if he was being sincere or not, so you sat up to look at his face again. After examining his face, you still couldn’t tell if he was being serious, so you snorted and playfully smacked his chest. “Yeah right,” you rolled your eyes. “Don’t try to pull that on me after you’ve been alive for over a thousand years, mister.” 

You giggled a little and he smiled at you, cupping your cheek again, forcing you to look at his face and your giggling to fade. “There is no one who is as incredible as you, (Y/n). You are truly the most beautiful girl I’ve ever encountered.” 

You were at a complete loss for words, gaping at him. You felt your ears heat up, wondering if the pounding you heard was his heart or yours. Noticing him staring at you intently, you also noticed his eyes flicking from your eyes to your lips constantly but you felt stuck. You were way too scared to just lean forward and connect your lips, even though you’ve always dreamed about what those pillows for lips would feel like against your own. You got lost in thought once again thinking about how unfair it was for this man to have such luscious lips, it should be a crime. 

Too far gone in your own thoughts, you barely noticed Jin leaning close to you, up until his nose brushed yours and he stopped. Both of your eyes were closed, yours being closed out of fear that you might spontaneously combust, his being closed in fear that this might be a dream. You’ve dreamed about this moment for so long, wondering if he was waiting for you to make the call of whether you’re going to press your lips against his or pull away. 

Releasing one shaky breath, you decided to throw caution to the wind and lean forward. Your lips brushed against each other for no more than a second, pulling away for a moment and searching his face, only to find him staring at you as if you were one of the seven wonders of the world. You took that as a sign to lean back in, cupping his cheek and pressing your lips more firmly onto his. The feeling of his lips against yours could easily be something to become addicted to, as you felt his hands trail down your back, causing you to shiver while they settled on your hips.  

You wanted to deepen the kiss, so you opened your mouth and swiped your tongue on his bottom lip. That must have triggered something in him, because he trailed his hands down from your hips to grip your ass and squeeze, which caused you to yelp, and for him to push his tongue deeper into your mouth. 

Out of all the ways you had thought this day would end, french kissing one of the men you’ve been in love with for months definitely did not cross your mind. But you couldn’t really complain when Jin shifted his hips up and you got a very.... detailed feel of him. The whimper that left your lips could have brought any man down to his knees, and Jin contemplated on whether he should start moving your hips against his or if that might overwhelm you too much. 

Your body had started moving on its own accord as you began moving your hips against his, feeling his groan against your mouth. You kept moving your hips, getting worked up at the feeling of him against you and the sounds leaving his mouth, until it had all began to feel like a little too much and the clothes you were wearing began to feel too stuffy. So, against your better judgment, you began to slow your hips down, pressing one more tender kiss against his lips before pulling away. 

He searched your face for any sign of discomfort and when you had clarified that it was just you getting a little too excited, he chuckled and leaned in to kiss your forehead. “It’s okay,” he gently reassured you when you went to bury your face in his neck again. It was beginning to become a favorite spot of yours. “We go at your pace, no matter how fast or slow that might be.” 

You didn’t think you could love this man any more, and yet here you were constantly being proven wrong. It didn’t take long for you to finally doze off, with the events that happened, you were surprised you hadn’t just collapsed as soon as you got home. You were lulled to sleep by Jin’s comforting hand rubbing your back, his lips on your forehead and his heart beat in your ears. 

He was finally able to relax his tensed body when he felt your body release all the tension that had built up, closing his eyes and almost dozing off himself, until he heard footsteps walking toward the apartment. 

“What happened to the door?!”  

A/N 

Alright, so this chapter is very long overdue. I’m pretty sure I started this story back when my senior year of highschool began and now I just recently finished my freshman year of college. I either couldn’t find the time or motivation to try and finish the chapter but I’m glad I finally did. That being said, I can’t be too sure when the next chapter is going to be, but I hope you stick around nonetheless! 

Hope you enjoyed this chapter, and please let me know what you think! your feedback is always welcomed! 

[luvdsc]

would you mind doing a description of each member of nct dream? you don’t have to cuz that’s lowkey a lot BUT i figured i’d ask since i’m trying to write something and get their personalities right. i really admire your work!! have a nice day, babes!!!

yes, of course, lovebug 💕 I’ll be rewording the analyses from the asks about my ideal type and adding to them, so it might be a bit familiar! I could’ve written more, but I had to stop because I reached max length for each paragraph 😅 I hope these are helpful to you, and thank you so much for liking my work, honey bee!!! 💛 best of luck with your writing, and I hope you have a good day, too! 🌼 also, I’m on mobile and I’m so sorry for all the scrolling! I’ll add a read more when I get on my laptop ✨ edit: the read more has been added :’)

MARK :: oh, where do i start with mister absolutely fully capable? mark is the definition of adorkable. if you look up that word in the dictionary, you’re gonna see his picture pasted right under it. he’s endearing and awkward, and he tries his best in everything and puts his best foot forward, giving 110% in whatever he does. he’s a hard worker and a good boy. he laughs at that’s what she said jokes, and he’s the type of person to think of a funny joke from three days ago and start laughing at the most inappropriate time, like in the middle of standard testing. he’ll say things he thinks are funny, like “five guys hello guys” or that long sentence about possibilities and immediately look to you with those wide doe eyes, seeking a positive reaction from you and hoping you’ll laugh. he’ll try to wink at you randomly sometimes, but he always fails and just ends up blinking, which will make you laugh and call him cute and have him scrunching up his nose because that’s not what he intended to happen and he’ll be really flustered at the compliment. he’s really sweet, and I think taeil called him the most romantic? however, I feel like having a relationship isn’t a high priority for him right now. he seems to have workaholic tendencies, which could frustrate his s/o. he would need to have someone that understands his work and music is the most important to him, and he might unintentionally neglect checking up with his s/o at times. he’s a little shy and introverted, so it might be hard for him to make a first move if you aren’t friends at first. he’ll write dozens upon dozens of songs about you. that’s the way he’ll express his affection because he’s too shy to in the beginning and music is what he’s good at. there will be lots of late nights with him strumming his guitar and you sitting next to him, reading a book or playing a game on your phone, and he’ll call your name and you look up before he nervously starts to play a new song that he’s written for you. and at the end of the song, he’ll glance up at you really quickly before looking back down at his guitar, and you’re going to have to go over to him and take his face into your hands softly and tell him his song was amazing and you love it as much as you love him. and he’ll smile so big as his glasses slide down his nose before he quickly leans up and presses the softest kiss against your mouth to show you his appreciation before he loses courage to do so. sometimes you steal those round rimmed glasses of his and try them on yourself, and mark has to cover his face and look away and wring his hands and he makes those little oi mark noises because you look so cute and he doesn’t know what to do with himself. on the other hand, mark is also very stubborn. it may not look like that, but if you notice the relationship between him and hyuck, hyuck is always the one giving in at the end. mark will absolutely not do something if he doesn’t want to do it. I do think he will go after something if he wants it, but he will hesitate slightly at first. he follows the rules a bit too much. he doesn’t seem to be the most fun person to party with either unless you get him to drink a beer because he’s a lightweight, but that also means you have to take care of him afterwards. also, he said in an interview that he doesn’t like rollercoasters or fast rides, but he enjoys the cotton candy at amusement parks lol but he did go on those rides in the end, but his head was down the entire time rip. mark gets easily embarrassed. it’s like in that video where they read tweets aloud and mark got super embarrassed when jaehyun read this tweet that gushed about his laugh, and mark just curled up into himself and couldn’t lift his head up and awkwardly laughed. he’s adorkable. please tease him and hype him up in this very same way just to get this cute reaction out of him.

RENJUN :: renjun is the one you can call when you have a body to bury and he’ll show up with the shovel. he’ll call you a stupid idiot, but he’ll still show up to help you. he’s the type that would come over at 3 a.m. if there’s a bug in your apartment and squash it for you after much complaining and telling you that he won’t do it. he’s fiercely loyal and caring. he took care of chenle when chenle wasn’t as proficient with korean and made sure he was doing ok and was always ready to translate for him whenever. he puts up a tough, ready to fight front, but he’s a scaredy cat and if you pretend to be a ghost (read: jisung), he’ll be scared shitless. you can see him get scared and hide behind jeno and hug him so hard when the zombie jumped out in one of those save dream interactive videos. he’s the person you can banter with and he understands dry humor and sarcasm, and I think he’s best for e2l story plot lines because of this lmao but he also fits the best friend role well. he will roast anyone with no mercy with just a few words. he’s artistic. he’s super good at art and has shared several of his beautiful digital drawings before. he’s the person to go to when you want to have long, serious talks at 4 in the morning, and as seen through his radio show, he will try his best to give you advice, even if he may not be experienced enough, but he is trying his hardest to help. if you read some of the advice he gives on his radio show, you can get a better sense of who he is as a person. he’s really insightful and puts a lot of effort into giving the best answer he can. also, he really reminds me of a little brother or someone I want to be best friends with because we can roast people together or talk about paranormal stuff. he just seems really fun to mess around with because he gives funny reactions. he gives off that younger sibling vibe where only your big sister can make fun of you, but once she sees someone else doing it, it’s not ok and she’s gonna go after that person for making her lil bro cry. in a relationship, he wants someone he can trust with his thoughts and interests, such as aliens, and while his s/o may not believe in them, he wants them to genuinely listen to him and not just brush it off. however, he will still roast his s/o into oblivion. it’s how he shows his affection lol. he’ll call you an idiot and cute all in the same sentence. but he’s really a soft and sensitive boy underneath his snappy, sarcastic exterior. he cried when they won first place for the first time. i’m sure he cried when ridin’ reached number one on the charts. he’s attentive and likes affection even though he tries to say he doesn’t. in that one weekly idol dreamie episode, hyuck listed who hated affection, and he wasn’t one of them. he’s a good boy, and underneath all his snarky comments, he wants to be loved and cared for. you can see how he got a lil huffy when jisung chose chenle as his favorite hyung lol he doesn’t express his feelings outwardly as much, but if you’re his s/o, he will quietly adore you in his own way while outwardly being that one snarky couple who banters all the time. he’ll draw pictures of you, secretly have you as his homescreen, or have a secret photo album on his phone of just pictures of you. he’ll complain if you get him a couple item, like a bracelet, but he’ll wear it 24/7 and refuse to give it back to you. he will absolutely lose his shit if he misplaces it. he’ll cook for you if you ask, but he’ll make a big show about fake complaining about it beforehand. I think he’s okay with hand holding and kisses here and there, but he won’t do grand gestures of pda because he thinks those should be more private and between the two of you. he thinks pet names are sappy as heck, and he’ll get terribly embarrassed if you call him one but he’d be like “that’s so gross and corny... but call me that again.” honestly, just tell him ily and his cheeks will turn so red and he’ll bury his face in his hands but he’ll say it back in the quietest voice and he truly does mean it with his whole chest.

JENO :: jeno is someone who fits in so many roles. his character is versatile in a sense. you can make him into a bad boy, the boy next door, your best friend, anybody. his humor is underrated, and he makes funny puns. he’s good at sarcasm and wit, like when he asked jisung if he thought jaemin’s iq was single digits or when the instructor complimented him and said his rap sounded like mark and he was like “oh.... that’s not good.” he worries about being funny. he mentioned losing sleep over it in weekly idol, so please tell him he’s funny and laugh at his jokes ): he really is funny, and i love his humor. jeno is really smart. he managed to rank 4th or something I believe in his school after cram studying the day before. he’s really self-assured and confident in himself, but he doesn’t show off or act cocky, yet you can sense the quiet confidence in him. he’s humble and works hard and deserves more credit than he’s given. he possesses leadership qualities and is a source of strength for other members. i think they said he was one of the cleaner members and when he’s drunk, he cleans LMAO he is into sports and gymming, especially biking. hyuck said that jeno’s bedroom has his and jaemin’s bikes hanging on the walls lol he also is really competitive, but not a sore loser type. jeno doesn’t strike me as the type who needs his s/o around 24/7 and prefers to have hobbies and space separate from his s/o. he’s laid back, but at the same time, still energetic and fun to be around. he’s still weird, but not over the top weird. jeno is insightful and kind, and he has stated that he’s very shy and timid before. doyoung likes him the most because he’s kind and respectful and takes into account other people’s feelings and listens well. he’s a good boy. he’s also really playful and teasing and plays well with others, like jisung jokes around with him all the time. I feel like jisung jokes around with him the most out of all his hyungs aside from chenle because jeno doesn’t get mad. i believe the members say he’s the only one aside from chenle who doesn’t get mad when someone messes up in dance practices. he cries when he gets angry. jeno is also really affectionate. he enjoys cuddling and holding hands and back hugs and whatnot, but he doesn’t overdo it. it takes a long time for him to trust and open up to someone, and you’re a very lucky person if he lets you see this side of him. he won’t force you to do anything you’re uncomfortable with. If something is bothering you, he won’t pry at first if you refuse to talk about it, but I do think he will eventually make you talk if he feels something is terribly wrong or if it’s affecting the relationship. jeno is driven and knows what he wants. he’ll give you space, but if you’re not what he’s looking for or if you don’t put the effort in as well and won’t open up to him, I do think he will move on. he might bottle up his emotions at first, but as the relationship progresses, he’ll be fully open to you and tell you everything. I don’t think he’ll be terribly affected if he’s rejected because he is confident in himself and able to brush it off. he knows his self-worth. oh, and he loves animals. obviously, jeno loves his cats because he has them even when he’s allergic. he’s the type of s/o who, if you mention you’re walking back to your dorm late at night after staying in the art building to finish your painting, he’ll show up with messy hair and his glasses in his sweats with a hoodie thrown on haphazardly and walk you back safely even without you asking. kiss him on his nose at random times just because you love him, and he’ll make that jeno trademark noise of confusion before giving you the prettiest eye smile that makes the moon dim in shame and nuzzling his face into your shoulder shyly. call him jeno darling or jeno love if you want to see the same reaction as before. it’s gonna be a total KO to his heart if you call him that and boop him on the nose with the softest kiss. anyway, jeno is the bestest boy in the entire universe, and give him all your love, please and thank you.

HAECHAN :: hyuck is so fucking talented. he’s good at everything: singing, dancing, rapping, variety shows, you name it. he was born to be an idol. he’s the golden one and excels at everything. he’s an ace, and he knows it. yeah, he’s cocky and brags about everything he does, but he actually has evidence and proof to back it up. plus, no one can stay mad at him for very long because have you seen how cute he is?? he’s a brat, but you still love him anyway. he’s good at sweet talking and getting what he wants. he plays a push and pull game, and you end up falling for him in the end. i know in fics on here, you often see jaemin in the playboy/fuckboy persona, but I think hyuck absolutely exudes this persona. he is able to read the room or a person and knows the exact way to act in order to get the reaction he wants. it’s hyuck’s world, and we’re all just living in it. he can have all of us eating out of the palm of his hand if he desires. i think he truly embodies the traits of a slytherin: ambitious and cunning. it’s every man for himself, and he’ll do whatever it takes to get what he believes he deserves and plays by his own rules. hyuck is so smart and intelligent, both in terms of brains and emotion. he’s absolutely brilliant, and he’s the type of person to ace an exam without even studying for it. I think he did very well in school, and he also beat doyoung in mental maths when they had a competition on weekly idol lol and he’s also street smart. there’s a reason why doyoung and taeil are scared of him and why they prefer to be on his team than against him lmao. I think hyuck is also a people pleaser though. he wants to be liked, and it’ll drive him crazy if someone calls him boring or shows no interest towards him. I think he’ll want a s/o who plays the push and pull game with him. he’ll playfully tease them a lot, and they’ll have to be interesting and able to dazzle him with their own wit and sarcasm. he, like renjun, is snarky and sarcastic. he likes to make people laugh and enjoys being the center of attention. he is super affectionate and rivals jaemin in this aspect. he thrives off of physical touches, hugs, cuddles, etc. he likes to cuddle when he sleeps, and I feel like he enjoys being the little spoon. he isn’t afraid of pda and will show off his s/o to the world with a loud kiss or back hug anywhere. he’s the type who would do that back pocket spin peter does to lara jean lmao. the two of you can laze around at home, while he plays video games on his computer and you can sit in his lap and he’ll do that thing where his arms are around you and his chin is on your shoulder. he’s a good cook, and he’ll cook for you, but he expects you to pay him back in kisses. his s/o might think he doesn’t pay attention to what they’re saying to him, but he does. he absolutely adores his s/o and remembers everything about them. he’s the type to surprise his s/o with their favorite flowers on a random day, and his s/o would’ve thought he wasn’t paying attention when they told him their favorite flower months ago. and please, please, please surprise him with flowers too because that will catch him off guard and you’ll see him blush and get flustered for once. it’s like when the dreamies first debuted, and chenle said hyuck was the best singer and he wanted to be like hyuck, and hyuck got really quiet and shy and flustered about it. however, he’d get really shy around his crush if they weren’t friends first. there’s that video of him returning something that twice’s mono dropped I think and he was so nervous before and afterwards. or there’s that time when he handed flowers to seungwoo and got so flustered as the dreamies teased him afterwards. also, I feel like sometimes people forget that so much hard work goes into what he does because he makes it look so effortless. hyuck works so hard in everything and puts his all into what he does. anyway, please appreciate hyuck and love him lots. he deserves to be showered in love and affection.

JAEMIN :: jaemin is like jeno in the sense that his character is also super versatile. you can make him fit any type of persona for your fic. jaemin is a sweetheart. his entire existence is love. hyuck said that he treats his members the same way he treats his fans in an episode of weekly idol before. he’s a really affectionate person as seen in the way he showers jisung with affection. he eats, sleeps, and breathes aegyo. you’re going to experience his aegyo a lot if you’re his s/o, so brace yourself. he even managed to make hyuck flustered when he kissed him in that recent reload era game video. he has a lot of love to give out, but he also wants the same amount of love in return. you can see how he craves for love from jisung in return and the way he gets a little upset when he doesn’t get it, like when jisung didn’t call him his favorite hyung. his s/o needs to be okay with being showered with affection and love, and they have to do the same for him. call him cute pet names, give him random kisses throughout the day, back hug him while he’s cooking, he will just absolutely glow and bask in your love. jaemin is good at cooking. he will cook for you, and if you cook, he’ll eat what you make with no complaints. it’s like that meme where person A gives person B a drink with salt in it, and person B drinks it all, and when person A asks why they did that even though it was salty, person B says it’s because they didn’t want to hurt person A’s feelings. jaemin is person B. he’ll also make you model for him and pose literally everywhere so he can take pictures of you because you’re the prettiest person in the entire world to him. he’ll make you his lockscreen, homescreen, hang up pictures of you in his room, all that jazz. he’s the one who buys couple items or outfits and makes you wear them with them. his entire Instagram account will be pictures of you or with you. however, he’s also petty af and nags a lot lmao. he complained to jeno when jisung said he wanted to eat bread at 3 a.m. and how he couldn’t go out to buy him any. he also nagged renjun in one of those dream vs dream videos for not having any questions about him, while all his questions were about renjun. or when he was sulking about jeno not knowing his favorite cartoon character. I believe he mentioned having extreme mood swings too where he’s either too quiet or too loud and out there, and as a s/o, you’d have to cater to both sides of him. jaemin is also an introvert. he’s very quiet and shy around strangers, but he’ll unleash his inner weirdness and loudness when he feels comfortable around you, and you’re in for a wild, fun ride. in that video where he and jeno were making cakes, he seems really hyper and wild. same goes for that video where they went out to eat, and jaemin was pouring soda into a glass dramatically. or when they played that dance game where you have to add onto the dance and copy the previous dances, and he added some random flailing motion and complained when someone did it wrong. or when he and renjun were paired up for that guessing game when they both had headphones on, and he started flailing everywhere and getting kinda frustrated at renjun for getting zero right. he’s a bit weird lmao. as his s/o, i hope you go along with his weird antics and have fun with him too! you also have to remind him to take care of himself. make sure he doesn’t drink that ungodly coffee drink of his or eat too much sugar. take care of him, love him, cherish him, and jaemin will be the best boyfriend ever. he might even set up a whole led light display for you at night declaring his love like he did for jeno. actually, no, he definitely will. he’ll do big grand gestures to show his love for you. he’ll fill your house with roses and press kisses to each of your fingertips with a different reason for why he loves you. he’ll continue to list the reasons for why he loves you for every star he sees until he runs out of stars, but he’ll never run out of reasons for loving you.

CHENLE :: chenle was born to be a star. he is so incredibly talented and picks up skills so quickly. it’s evident because he managed to debut after two months of training and he became fluent in korean quickly. he’s humble and gracious, and he’s the embodiment of that miss universe song: he’s beauty, he’s grace. he doesn’t flaunt his wealth, in fact, it only ever comes up because others bring it up. or he accidentally shows it off when he asks what rent means or when he tries to innocently rectify the situation, like when jaemin was like “oh his parents held a concert for him for his bday” and chenle was like “noooo no it was just to make a memory” on idol room lmao. the way he expresses his love is through gift giving. it shows in the way he told mark he’ll buy him anything he wants for his bday or when he gave apple watches to the 00 liners or when he immediately agreed to buy jeno a plane ticket to china to show him around his home. but he’s not trying to flaunt his wealth. this is simply how he shows his love. chenle is laidback and easygoing. he doesn’t care about jisung using honorifics with him, and he’ll go along with whatever’s happening. there’s that one video during mfal era where hyuck and chenle won the prize and hyuck was like “hey I’ll take the prize ok?” and chenle just immediately agrees and doesn’t care at all. but don’t get me wrong, chenle is super competitive. he wants to win, but it’s more about that feeling you get when you’re the winner, rather than the actual prize for him. he’s really into sports, specifically basketball, so i feel like he’d enjoy it if his s/o expressed some sort of interest in it with him. they don’t have to play basketball with him, but he’d appreciate it greatly if they listened to him talk about stephen curry or cheer him on from the sidelines. he’s affectionate. if you read my renjun description, chenle is the other one that hyuck said doesn’t mind affection from the other members on weekly idol. I don’t see him showing affection blatantly as much like hyuck and jaemin, but I think he loves receiving it. chenle obviously receives so much love from his family and is super close to them. he will love his s/o with his whole heart, and I hope his s/o will love him back just as much. also, I’m pretty sure he’ll love his s/o acting cute because his heart rate spiked up when jisung did aegyo on idol room lmao. I think he’s the only other extrovert in the dreamies, besides hyuck. I believe someone asked jaemin or skz hyunjin if they got close after the collab stage, and they said that they were really awkward with each other. however, skz felix and chenle became good friends! chenle is friendly and a people person. he thrives in social settings, and he’s a social butterfly. he’ll help people out of their shells and make sure to include them in conversations. he’s the type of person who would clear his throat and be like “hey y/n has something to say” if you tried to say something in a group convo and weren’t heard. he’s fine with being the center of attention, but he doesn’t actively seek out that position, like hyuck does. unlike hyuck, he’s not a people pleaser. I think he’s confident in himself, and he’s self assured and satisfied with who he is, so he doesn’t really care what others think of him. chenle is really playful. he likes to tease the other members and wreak harmless havoc lol you can see how he plays around with the other members, like in nct life where he just throws snow at jisung or scares jisung with a rubber chicken when they went to an amusement park in shanghai. he’s a thrill seeker. he loves roller coasters, shooting games, laser tag, etc. he gets excited over the littlest things, and he’s a naturally cheerful person who lights up the room and just naturally has people gravitate towards him. however, he has his serious moments too, and I can see him sitting next to his s/o behind the piano and playing something for them. but then, he’ll probably ruin the soft moment by slamming his hands down on the keys and scaring them at the end.

JISUNG :: jisung reminds me of high school puppy love. he’s curious about the world and introspective. he asked the fans to send him pictures of the moon because he couldn’t see it himself. I think he has a lot of deep thoughts and keeps them to himself because he’s introverted and nervous about sharing them aloud in case he’s not taken seriously as the youngest. he’s inquisitive and sweet, and he’s the culmination of everything good in the universe. he’s the one whom renjun talks to about aliens and paranormal things, and I believe he’ll want a s/o who will take him seriously on these things and listens to his concerns without teasing or making fun of him for believing in them. jisung is shy and gets embarrassed when he’s given compliments. there’s this video where the dreamies read compliments from fans aloud, and you can see how flustered and shy he gets as he ducks his head, has to pause and cover his face before playing with his hair as he reads through the compliments with the biggest smile peeking on his face. I think this is the cutest thing ever, and at the beginning of the relationship, if his s/o compliments him or does something cute, he’s going to react exactly like that. tell him his dancing is amazing, watch his fancams around him, tell him his face is nice to look at, etc. and you’ll see him get reduced to a flustered, blushing mess. the first time he sees you wearing one of his sweaters with the sleeves covering your hands and giving you sweater paws, he will combust and stutter and not be able to look at you as his cheeks turn red. he might just suffer a heart attack if you decide to casually call him a cute pet name one day. additionally, jisung is at that age where he wants to know what others think of him and he wants to be liked. I think this is the reason why he’s more hesitant about speaking up or voicing himself in an unfamiliar environment because he doesn’t want to give off a negative image. he’s also painfully shy, but he wants to make friends, which he explains on dancing high. because of this, he truly cherishes any friendship or relationship he has because it’s seen as something incredibly special to him. as his s/o, you’re gonna mean the world to him and he will value your opinion greatly. once he’s comfortable around you, he’ll be loud and talkative. jeno says that jisung talks the most at the dorm and he’s never quiet. jisung is also a lil shit lol, and he knows how to get out of things, like cleaning up after dinner by locking himself in the bathroom. he’s also a little lazy and probably not the cleanest tbh. he sleeps in jaemin’s bed or in the living room because he’s too lazy to go to his top bunk. he doesn’t listen to his hyungs and talks down to them in a playful way because he knows they’re whipped for him lmao. when the relationship progresses, jisung is going to act in the same, exact way with you. he’s a savage, and he will roast you in the same way he roasts his hyungs, like when hyuck wanted to go to LA with him for why not the dancer and he was like “you have to be good at dancing to go” (which btw, fight me, jisung, hyuck is literally the best dancer). he’ll tease you, hide items on the tallest shelf just so that you’ll call him for help, and smush your cheeks and call you cute. he’ll ruffle your hair and run up behind you and sweep you off your feet princess style just to scare you before carefully placing you back down or tossing you into the pool lol he may have complained about carrying renjun in that reload era game video, but he’ll give you piggy backs when you’re tired or carry you around if you asked. he likes playing video games and those block breaker game apps and when he loses, he’ll sit there and pout without realizing it. he does that little nose scrunch unknowingly, and it’s the cutest. he’ll like dates at home the best. he sucks at cooking, but he’ll try to do it for you. but it’ll end up with you cooking while he back hugs you, and you have to walk around the kitchen with him being a koala attached to you as you feed him bits of the food being made.

[atomicfilm]

INTP Turn Ons

Intellect

No, you don’t need an IQ of 140 and if you go around telling them that they’ll make you prove it eventually.

We love to converse with people we don’t find draining, so if you can hold our interest for more than a few minutes we’ve already noticed you. That’s pretty rare for us.

It doesn’t really matter specifically what you’re interested in, so long as you’re passionate and can teach us a lot about it. Or maybe a little about a lot of things. But be as well researched as possible otherwise they won’t trust you as a source of information. 

If you have different opinions from us, that could actually be a plus, so long as you like to flirt through debating. But we like to take our time discovering our beliefs! We may switch sides and if you’re too stagnant and close-minded, we’ll be bored soon. 

For example, I actually have no close friends with the same interests as me but I love them because they’re able to introduce me to new information. Even if you’re knowledgable about music or videogames, an INTP could find this particularly interesting.

The weirder you are, the better. We love people who are accepting of our ridiculous theories/jokes and are willing to play games with us. 

People who think independently? Oo la la! There are too many people who plagiarize others, even verbally, and it’s terribly easy to spot. 

But pretentious people? No. We’re not going to bother talking to you if we can avoid it. That’s too obnoxious. 

Depending on the INTP, we may find dark humor and sarcasm to be our love language. Being teasing but not truly mean? Major bonus.  

Admitting when you’re wrong is too scarce. And don’t be afraid to tell us if we messed up.

Trust me, you won’t win the interest of an INTP by being all brawn and no brains. 

Excitement

If you make small talk constantly then you’re likely not on our radar. However, it’s all in the delivery, if you can make boring stories into enchanting tales then you’re perfect for us. 

ADVENTURE. Even if it’s as simple as playing in the race car shopping carts at the grocery store or roleplaying as gallant knights in the woods, we’re fun nerds.

We’re attracted to people who make us try things we wouldn’t normally do on our own. This is why we have a tendency to be around at least a few crazy extraverts who jump off buildings or go cliff diving. 

TALENT IS SO SEXY. For me, I’m always infatuated with people who are entertainers, especially people who I expect to be future comedians or artists. Sometimes I really like people who are interested in engineering. Whatever your talent, the better you are at it, the more interest you’ll raise. 

WIT. If you reply to the oddities of our texts/conversations with banter, prepare to catch a swooning INTP. 

Don’t mistake drama for excitement. If you’re picking fights with all of your friends, we’ll expect you to do the same with us. 

If you’re a little mysterious, just enough to intrigue us but not so much that you’re lying, being insincere otherwise, or being overtly private you may catch our eye. It’s a lot of fun to solve the puzzle of people in good time but no one wants to be bogged down by having to guess about a person’s desires nor their honesty. 

Positive vibes! Do you bring your friends cookies? Do you smile and talk to strangers on the subway? It’s easy to fall in love with someone just because they’re a genuinely nice person.  

The more easily entertained you are, the better. Often we want to retreat into solitude and if you’re clinging to us to keep you from boredom, we’ll get snappy sometimes. Plus, we don’t always want to be the only one generating ideas for things to do. 

Stability

Sure, maybe you weren’t expecting that when the category above it was excitement.

We’re logical homebodies. We want people who we can imagine sharing our home with, even if it’s in a very nontraditional way. 

When all hell breaks loose, all we want is a shoulder to lay our heads on and a hand to hold. Someone we can fight against the world with. An equal partner. 

While it’s important not to take one another for granted, the safety in knowing that someone will always be around to have your back is one of the most important factors for long-term relationships.

Stable people are the people who don’t extract too much from us emotionally, who don’t force us to do things we’re morally opposed to, who understand our needs even if we can’t find the words. 

Not to mention, confidence! Being stable in oneself is also about having healthy self-esteem and being able to be decisive about what you want. 

Flaky and moody people are just too inconsistent for us to predict unless they’re constantly moody and flaky. If you’re going to be late for an event, tell us. If you need some space, let us know. 

Also, stable people are easy to respect and a relationship can’t be healthy without mutual respect. 

We’re constantly trying to improve ourselves and we don’t have a lot of spare energy to spend improving you. 

Miscellaneous

When in doubt, just ask. Maybe they don’t like constant verbal affirmations and do want to be cuddled. Maybe they hate cuddling and need to be told “I love you” several times a day. Either way is okay if it works for you too. 

Don’t let your personality be consumed by us. We don’t want to date ourselves, hopefully (unless you’ve found a narcissist), and valuing yourself makes it all the more easy to like you.  

INTPs can be very, very particular and seemingly random. At the end of the day, maybe the people we love don’t check off all the boxes on a list. 

People who remind us to breathe every once in a while and support us will always be winners. 

[ranposlittle]

Can I get a matchup 👉🏻👈🏻🥺 I’m 19, 180cm and I speak French! I’m a criminal psychology student and I’ve got a dry sense of humour and can be quite sarcastic but I’m actually really nice when you get to know me. I make jokes in the worst situations and whenever I’m stressed out I grin (but I don’t mean to!) I’m always reading/watching crime things, but sometimes I’m super lazy and spend the whole bed in day. I’m also super nocturnal and stay up all night look at the stars Thank you 💫

I ship you with...

🦝 Edgar Allan Poe 🦝

It is by pure coincidence that the two of you met but you instantly clicked because of your field of study that coincides with Poe's passion of writing crime mystery novels. You enchanted him and he enchanted you. At the end of the day, he shyly asked you if you'd like to meet again so you can continue your discussion. One meeting led to another and another, until you've became even more accustomed with each other.

Poe loves how he can talk to you so freely about anything involving true crime. The morbid details doesn't bother you and frankly, he learned some new information from you that he made a mental reminder to use on his next novel. Because of your shared interest, it was almost effortless to talk to each other and there was almost no awkward silence that fills the room. He especially admires your outlook in looking at cases, smart and precise but at the same time, still in a humanly fashion and with full empathy. He loves that you are able to understand the psychological factors of each end of the spectrum and he loves seeing the dedication you put out to your studies. He also thinks you're a brave person for choosing this field among all others as everybody knows how mentally taxing the work could be, but still, your passion triumphs every challenge that it could bring. Anyone could hear the obvious excitement and happiness that is on Poe's voice as the two of you form theories and discuss m.o's. Time seems to vanish as you engage in your endless discussion and it almost seems like your time together is always not enough. Poe would also help you out with your studies in any way that he can, he's particularly good at essays and he wouldn't mind doing it for you if you'd let him. He tends to get a bit carried away though, so don't forget to remind him about the page limit.

Since Poe isn't really a comedic person, your dry-wit humor might go over his head at first but his intelligent self would quickly catch on the more that he hangs out with you. He started to like how witty and snappy you could be and he is impressed. It won't be long until he'll start to clapback at your jokes so be prepared. Soon enough, you'll have a back and forth exchange of dry-wit banters that will make the other laugh. It's his type of humor and it just adds on the pile of reasons for him to like you.

He's also quite the anxious person and he reactions to certain situations can also be a bit quirky. In this aspect, you share the trait of perhaps smiling in a situation where you're not supposed to or making an untimely joke when your intention was just to help lighten up the mood. Because of this, when such things happen, you'll be able to understand what the other was truly trying to express. Unlike other people, you'll be more appreciative or maybe even find it the joke funny. You can share a small laugh in an awkward situation and it would be like it's only the two of you who knows about the punchline.

Overall, I think Poe could be your guy since you will have a communication compatibility that stems from a common interest. Poe would be more than happy to watch or read more true crime cases with you and you can always count on him to have a good discussion of it afterwards. You might also find it impressive that he's an author of this genre and maybe one day, you'd be interested to write one of your own because of all the things that you learned from him. He can mentor you too if you'd like, he'd be really excited if you'd ask him. I also believe that Poe might know an amount of French and probably have traveled there a couple of times, but he will still find it impressive that you can speak it fluently. Poe is also someone who doesn't know the meaning of a sleeping pattern (see his dark circles) and if you want someone to stay up with you to watch the stars, he's the one. Being a poet makes him appreciate things like this and he understands why stargazing is a worthy activity to spend your time on. He's most likely a nocturnal like you as well so you can be assured that he'll be working alongside you every night because he believes that he gets his best ideas when he's sleep deprived. Although, because of how close your height is from each other, your age difference wouldn't be too obvious at first glance. However, it still does exist and Poe is very much aware of its impact. That is why despite his fondness towards you, he wouldn't mind taking a step back and letting you decide for yourself as to who you'd like him to be in your life. If you decide that you just want him to be a friend, he'd be okay with that and would just like the fact that he can hang out with someone as cool as you.

***

Thank you for sending this in, anon! 🌼 I'm sorry if ever the age gap between you and Poe made you uncomfortable but I can't think of anyone else who can be as compatible as him with you. I sincerely apologize. I hope you still enjoy this though 😣

[cinaminho]

Stray Mafia: You get Snarky/Sassy with them

Uh ohhhh back again with a flop y'know

╰ Group: Straykids

╰ Genre: comedy

╰ Warnings: Language,, very mild violence ,, some are shorter than others,, not in order

Request:Hi can I please have a skz mafia scenario where you get into an argument and you say something really sassy like or snarky please 💓

BTW: in case you don't know their roles

Chan • Leader,, sets up every mission ,, plans everyone's position ,, always has a backup plan ,, prefers to use a bat//stick because people tend to underestimate those types of weapons,, Chan states "you just gotta know how to use them"

Changbin • Under boss ,, calls shots when Chan isn't present and is the head in negotiating ,, he's also a great sniper

Woojin • in charge of the cartel,, intelligent so you can't mess him over when it comes to supplies,, hand gun/knife/sword master

Minho • Head Spy ,, good in undercover missions,, Teams best non weapon fighter,, great with making poisons (thank you Yuta)

Hyunjin • Weapon suppliier ,, knows how to get military weapons because of connections,, underestimated because he looks innocent,, knows how to use 98% of weapons made

Felix • the interrogator,, his deep voice is intimidating ,, isn't afraid to torture you if he has to just to get the info that is needed

Jisung • Hacker,, tech prince,, might be able to get secrets from the Pentagon to be honest,, hacking skills are as faster than sending and retrieving a text,, he's also good at kidnapping enemies so they can be interrogated

-

Plot - Your Dark World Lover has hit below the bit or caused irritation to you so you get back him the best way you know how which is by being cunning with your words and snappy attitude.

/// .•°*♡

- - -

{ Chan }

"You walk around so high and mighty because you're a leader of your own mafia now which is ironic to me considering your brain isn't even half the size of the bullets you use I bet!"

You spat at your significant other as his back was turned to you, he had cancelled your date night again because of underworld business, he just blew you off without even trying to Reassure you that you could reschedule. Your tone caught his attention as he froze in the middle of tying his Neck tie . He spun slowly on the heels of his dress shoes to you, his normal smile gracing his face as his shoes clicked on the marbel floor your stood your ground crossing one foot infront of the other along with your arms. Once Chan was infront of you he teasingly Bent down to be eye level with you. He grazed his finger under your chin.

"Because I think you're on your monthly, I'll take your snappy attitude that is however the only time I will except it." He spoke before cupping the back of your neck and slowly leaning his lips to your ear.

"There are limits to my patience remember that, My dear."

{Woojin}

He was not having it clearly you must've forgot just how rude Woojin could get so when you gave him a slick remark due to him saying you needed to clean up more which you had , the place was spotless, Woojin was just a neat freak, you figured he was just in a bitch mood.

"Look Y/n just clean up." He frustratedly ordered once more.

"Clean up what Woojin? You know actually tell you what, how 'bout for once YOU clean, start with that dumb ass attitude." You exclaimed.

Woojin looked as if you'd gone mad his before you knew it he was slightly leaning over you as he stood over you who sat on the couch his hands were gripping the Arms of the couch to support himself lightly hovering over you. You were screaming silently, your skin grew hotter as your nerves heightened.

"Don't think I won't lock you away to set you right little girl..You ever talk to me like that again and I'll have you afraid to even speak greetings to anyone."

{Changbin}

You. Fucked. Up. Completely.

Now be no fool, Changbin loved you now that it was known it wouldn't change and as a loving couple of course you two would get into little spats naturally but this one was more heated, words of furious lovers were being threw back and forth, Fury gazes, neither willing to admit defeat, you really were blindsided by your anger you didn't notice until you'd said it, you just had to poke the bear though, right?

"Don't be a bitch okay?" You sarcastically stated.

"The phrase 'it takes one to no one' doesn't nearly fit enough in this situation." He responded matching your clearly sarcasm, you flickered from crazy to insane just like that before you knew it you were attempting to slap him. He grabbed your hand.

You looked between him and the hand that was in his grasp, his face scrunched in a murderous form, evident heavy breathing came from you both, one fear , one livid anger. His teeth were clenched so tightly you were they may break. Soon after silence and anticipation came his next actions. The base of his thumb pressed painfully deep into the palm of your hand adding a bit of his nail as well , you winced loudly as your knees became weak collapsing under you , so , down you went. He wasn't letting up either as he stared at your tortured pained face.

"Mark my words and God as your witness you're clearly out of your Damn mind if you're raising your hand at me, you will only be able to use your feet and mouth to feed you if you pull this bullshit Ever again. I promise."

{Minho}

"Of all the Days in the world you choose the today to go on a mission WHICH MAY I ADD,, you excepted behind my back you selfish son of a--"

"~Easyy there baby tiger, your anger is a weapon while the words are the ammunition." He Cheshirely grinned. Your gaze narrowed you in all honest felt a vain about to pop out of your neck from restraining your urge to strangle him.

"You're a Dick." You said through gritted teeth

Minho's mouth dropped open, he was at a loss for words, soon that changed once he Laughed, he seemigly and genuinely found you hilarious his adorable gummy smile filled with mischief was show cased as he doubled over laughing at you.

Minho glided towards you with his hands behind his back you held your head up high prepared for whatever it was that he has to say, or at least you hoped you were.

His face looked over yours carefully trying to call your bluff. He tilted his head to the side letting out a cute cackle. You hated when he didn't take you seriously.

"You really are the cutest thing when you try to snap back at me, good try , same time tomorrow?" He suggested before walking away leaving you to silently scold yourself. One of these days you'd get under his skin enough.

{Hyunjin}

"So you can locate Foreign weapons but can't locate the dairy aisle in a store? Remarkable."

He was showing some of the latest weapons that he obtained and allowed you to come along you wanted to tease and have a little fun but really you didn't choose the best time to try and make a joke out of him, on purpose of course. He'd had just about enough of your playful banter shenanigans . He excused himself from the group of men who also didn't find your humor amusing to talk to you.

"Y/n I don't think now Is the time to joke." He spoke flatly.

"I'm just joking lighten up."

Hyunjin looked towards the men who were paying attention to his high profile weapon shelf before he turned back to you, he snaked his hand through your hair giving you a soft smile. His soft touch soon became rough as he fisted some of your hair slightly bringing his face inches closer to yours.

"Do I look like I care that you're joking? Now Is not the time to joke I said."

He yanked his hand away from your head , your hand soon reaching to sooth the burn from where he'd pulled it, you were flabbergasted.

{Jisung}

You were literally talking to your friend about him while he was in the next room, he'd asked that you didn't speak about him to your friends for safety purposes , however, you thought he was just overreacting. Seriously what harm could it do? You were going to find out as you paid the price for ignoring his request or your phone would at least.

"This is my Last time requesting this, Y/n, please do not discuss me with your friends." He huffed puffing his cheeks out. You thought he was cute but the reddned hue on his cheeks indicated he was losing his patience. His fist balled at his sides, nails digging in the skin of his own palms.

"Jisung stop being a drama queen." You snickered.

Jisung's eye twitched slightly. "Drama Queen? , noted." He smirked. Before you knew it he Walt's over to you snatching the phone from your grasp not giving you time to question his actions before he savagely smashed it to the ground with a frustrated growl.

You let out a squeak as you stared at the broken electronic devise. Jisung smiled at his dilberate work.

"Oh, and if you ever call me a drama Queen again. There is way more where that came from, m'kay Pumpkin?" He stated before patting your head and walking away.

{Felix}

You were in the middle of a heated discussion and honestly you weren't listening because there was no way in hell you were postponing your wedding because his 'business' could get in the way of that. His words were going in one ear and out of the other.

"Honestly you're wasting not only your words on a useless excuse and my time. For someone who claims to be intelligent you sure sound like a numbskull right now."

Your words were like poisoned darts. You began to exit the room but Felix to big steps to soon be infront of you blocking your exit. He gripped your lower jaw snitching it in his so you had no other choice but to look at him as his grip gradually tightened if you tried to look away, you had to face the demon.

"Don't even think of insulting my intelligence! and This conversation is far from over. So pull up a seat. Shut up and listen , close your mouth for a millisecond. I'm postponing the wedding because the location may be compromised, if you'd just open your ears you'd know that I've stated that ,bridezilla ,know my reasoning behind my actions before you speak." He firmly demanded.

You were completely loss for words you couldn't find your voice so you kept your lips sealed. Felix smugly smirked at your expression.

"You've got something on your face." He declared squinting over your features.

"Ahh that's what it is. The look of pure stupidity." He said matter of factly .

[the-irish-mayhem]

I saw Captain Marvel.

Spoiler-free reaction:

Spoilery reaction under the cut.

+ things I liked +/- things I was mixed on - things I did not like

+ GOOSE!

+ SLJ in his prime, and we finally get solid Fury backstory.

+ The 90s aesthetic really worked for me.

+ “It’s loading.”

+ A really great job with the Skrull/Kree conflict, and actually made me care about the Skrulls they introduced us to.

+ MARIA RAMBEAU. She wasn’t just a background badass, they gave her a nice side arc. Loved the emotion she showed with the losing her best friend storyline.

+ Jude Law was an absolute snack in this movie. Holy bucknuggets.

+ Helped confirm some of my headcanons about Asgardian superiority in space travel because of the Bifrost, and confirmed some of my headcanons about the nature of wormhole travel in the MCU as well. (Traveling to “jump points” is... literally exactly how I’ve been rationalizing it all these years trying to write it. #vindication)

+ I liked the lost memory plot with Carol. That was probably the part of the plot I liked the most, and I wish they’d leaned on it even more and given Brie Larson more Emo moments when trying to figure out her past.

+ Carol is the original Avenger <3

+ Sets up for Carol to possibly be the next defacto “Leader” of the Avengers throughout the next phases. She’s in hot contention with T’Challa in my mind for that title.

+ Carol beating up the Old Lady Skrull on the train. I fucking LOVED IT.

+ I DON’T THINK I SAW A SINGLE GODDAMN WEDGE HEEL

+/- Brie Larson. I’m still not sold on her casting. For me, she comes across as an actor who is very grounded in reality. Realistic stories, realistic drama, etc. Room, The Glass Castle (the only stuff of hers I’m familiar with) all real world drama and I thought she was amazing in them. But for some reason I never quite fully bought her as Carol. The delivery of some of her humorous lines didn’t read as “Carol has snappy wit,” it read as “this actress memorized a line and delivered it with humor” I read a review that said something along the lines of her being overshadowed in her own movie, and I agree.

+/- The last part of her fight with Yon-Rogg, after she’s blasted him into a rock after he challenged her to fight him without her powers, where she just assuredly says, “I don’t need to prove myself to you” was an odd moment because it was so.... contrary to everything we’d seen up to that point? Throughout the movie, I never got the sense she was trying to prove herself to him. In fact, she didn’t seem to give a flying fart about what he thought of her. She knew her capabilities right off the bat, and winning his pride or approval never seemed to matter to her. To me, it came across something as they maybe had come up with in a late draft that they really liked and felt like they should put in even if the rest of the character arc wasn’t properly structured for it. Not that I think it was a bad moment AT ALL. I loved the subversion, but I think it could’ve felt more earned and landed a little harder if they built up to it.

+/- I am really not sure how I feel about the explanation for Fury losing his eye. I don’t know if I like them going the “humor” route, even if it’s not QUITE humorous, I don’t think I’m big on the idea of him not having a hella badass way he lost his eye. I just really don’t know. I think this bit kind of falls under “Marvel’s Funny Problem”

+/- I was hoping to be excited that Carol was going to be the “Big Gun” against Thanos, but I’m not, really. She kind of just feels like another addition to the team, her resumé submitted with an origin film.

- Jude Law giving us lazy exposition on the Supreme Intelligence. It was so freaking lazy. I know this is a Marvel movie and they love talking exposition but it was so bad.

- How self referential the entire movie felt. Half the thing felt like an unsubtle Easter Egg to the face with how desperately they were trying to push Carol into a history they clearly never planned.

- An addendum to that point, since I’ve been semi-distancing myself from Marvel (or at least, not being as deeply invested in story and theories and plot minutiae from all previous films) that half the time I had to take myself out of the story to remember exactly WHY I should care that Ronan (Ronin?) is important.

- I’ve completely lost track of the chain of custody of the Tesseract.

- I’m gonna be That Bitch and compare Captain Marvel to Wonder Woman. Not on a plot or quality basis or whatever, but in terms of my personal viewing experience becuase I am a woman and I’m going to relate more personally to female superheroes, and these two are THE solo ladies right now. So in Wonder Woman, I had several moments where I was near or in tears because of how good it felt to be there watching it. I felt empowered by the fact that I saw a badass female character on screen, with a great plot and production quality and cinematography and a score that STILL has me in tears. Honestly, I was kind of expecting and hoping for the same feeling during this movie, because Marvel is sort of my Main Squeeze and I’ve been looking forward(ish) to this movie for YEARS. But there was nothing. I enjoyed it much the same as I enjoy any other Marvel movie, in as much as I enjoyed Infinity War and Cap 3. But nothing really tugged deep in my soul like Wonder Woman did, and still does.

The NYT review by AO Scott kind of said it so succinctly: “you’ll shuffle out of the theater feeling both satisfied and empty.”

I may come away with more feelings and thoughts when I watch it again, but for now, I think this will suffice for a review.

[foundcarcosa]

I did my birth chart a long ass time ago but that one wasn’t as detailed as this one (it’s got sextiles and shit). I’m gonna post this one with its descriptions partially so I can find it again and also just for funsies. (I find it very difficult to argue with anything I’ve read in here, just so y’all know... lmao #draggt)

Very long post, but I tried to use formatting to at least break it into manageable pieces. The pronouns and shit (sometimes it’s like “you [xyz]” and sometimes it’s like “he [xyz]” or whatever) jump all over the place for some reason, but meh.

I’m gonna do the houses in another post to try and split it up.

sun in gemini

With the Sun in Gemini, the urge for self-expression is strong. These natives are often just as interested in collecting information as they are in sharing it. Curious to a fault, Geminis have a finger in every pie. Solar Geminis are flexible and changeable people. Their ability to adapt quickly to new situations generally gains them plenty of friends and social contacts. Usually quite clever and witty, Geminis enjoy intellectual conversations and they are easily bored if they are not getting enough mental stimulation. Often quite adept at fitting in with others, Geminis easily adopt the moods of those around them. They are friends to people from all walks of life, and are not easily intimidated. Their ability to detach themselves can make Geminis very objective and observant, but a little difficult to get close to. Although they often have many friends, intimacy doesn't come as easily to Solar Geminis. It can be difficult to know what Gemini really feels at any given moment. They are often very impressionable and scattered. There is usually a nervous air to Geminis that can make more personal characters a little uneasy. It is not always intuitive to trust Geminis to be loyal or to keep secrets. Geminis often flit about, moving quickly and keeping busy every step of the way. Many people with this position of the Sun have gained quite a bit of knowledge in their lifetimes, but they don't often possess specialized knowledge. This is because Geminis have relatively short attention spans. Restlessness is especially common with this position of the Sun. Usually quite affable, Geminis enjoy the "light" side of life. This tendency to take things lightly makes them quite pleasing to be around; but it can be maddening to people seeking support on the deeper issues in life. Geminis are both interesting and interested. Their wit can be dazzling and their changeability dizzying. At the very least, Geminis will seldom bore you.

Gemini ascendant Scorpio | Sun in VII

You take pride in your ability to negotiate, and to establish harmony in your relationships. It is important to you to have a partner, as you feel incomplete without one. You are motivated to become well-liked, and you are especially sensitive to rejection. One of the lessons in your life may be to avoid putting harmony and others' opinions of you above your own needs. Use your social skills and seek out peaceful relations with others, but try not to over-identify with your partnerships and the way you are received by others. You may marry someone with a strong personality.

moon in gemini

Lunar Geminis are usually pleasant, witty, and charming people. At home and with family, however, they can be moody and irritable at times. People with Moon in Gemini are always interesting people--they have a finger in every pie, are curious to a fault, and are generally well-informed. Nervousness and worry are common traits with this lunar position. An underlying restlessness is common, and many Lunar Geminis need more stimulation than others. They usually read a lot, talk a lot, and think a lot with this airy, mutable position of the Moon. Their homes are often a perpetual work-in-progress. They generally dislike housework, but are big on home improvement. Re-organizing their homes in little--and sometimes big--ways seems to keep them happy, as Lunar Geminis are easily bored by both routine and constancy. Often, this is a reflection of their inner world--"the grass is always greener..." applies here. Inwardly, Lunar Geminis are often unsettled. Moon in Gemini parents are generally more adept at handling the intellectual needs of their children than emotional ones. Others' complicated emotions, in general, can be difficult for Lunar Geminis to handle. In their families, Lunar Geminis often take on the role of organizing get-togethers. They are at their best when they have plenty of things to do beyond routine. Moon in Gemini people almost always have a way with words. They are clever and witty, and more often than not can be found chatting with others. They are sociable and friendly, and feel comfortable in crowds. Some pay too much attention to what everyone else is doing, and lose touch with what they really want to do. Generally, Lunar Geminis have a million and one projects going. They are impressionable folk, and their imagination is boundless. Their openness to new ideas is admirable, although decisiveness and persistence take a blow as a result. Still, versatility and adaptability are some of the stronger traits of this position of the Moon. When irritable, these people can easily become snappy. Their moodiness is complicated--this is not the same kind of moodiness you'll find with water sign moons, for example. Usually, difficult behavior stems from inner restlessness. Lunar Geminis want to do it all, and have trouble sticking to any one project. When problems arise, the first instinct of Moon in Gemini natives is to talk things out. Their tendency to analyze can give them the appearance of emotional detachment. In fact, Lunar Geminis may be especially comfortable talking about their feelings, but feeling their own feelings doesn't come as easily. Those that don't take time out to really emote and understand their own needs may end up baffling others. Feeling misunderstood is common for Moon in Gemini natives. The only real solution to the problem is learning to get in touch with their own feelings. 

Moon in VIII It has a tendency to having deep and profound dreams. Romantic fantasies. Is interested in the occult. While you have a strong need for emotional security, you are also a person who is drawn to pushing your own limits, and many lifestyle changes can be the result of this need to challenge, or reinvent, yourself emotionally. You are always fascinated with how people work, taboos, secrets, and all that is forbidden or hidden. Sexual unrest, or an apparent need to constantly change sexual partners or to challenge yourself sexually, may be a symptom of emotional insecurity. Connecting with another person intimately is an emotional need, but your changeable emotions might often get in the way of your goal. Jealousy and possessiveness might also be qualities you struggle with. At your best, however, you are a person who is intimate, deep, and intensely loyal to a partner.

358 Conjunction Moon - Mercury You can be quite expressive and animated in your speech. You have an outstanding memory and tend to pick up a lot of information from your environment. You love to chat and to exchange ideas. Even if you are shy, once you're friends, you love to talk about pretty much anything under the sun, and you enjoy sharing stories from your past! For the most part, you are focused on day-to-day activities in your communications rather than on grander philosophies. You are naturally curious and interested, and others find you very easy to talk to. You are accommodating and curious, but you are not as well equipped to handle heavy emotional demands. You thrive on change and variety. You might be a little addicted to gossip! More probably, however, you are simply very curious about others. There is a twinkle in your eyes, and you are never short on humor. You are playful and versatile--you make a fun companion and an interesting friend. You listen! Yes, you do talk and occasionally interrupt in your excitement, but you are a curious person who does want to hear what others have to say, and that is a real pleasure. In fact, you are more able than most people to get others talking, simply because you are very receptive and sympathetic. You pick up others' feelings and body language readily.

210 Sextile Moon - Jupiter It is generally pleasantly composed, due to an inner sense of harmony and emotional balance. It is optimistic--and realistically so, most of the time--which contributes to its overall "luck". It is able to get a real perspective on emotional matters that not only benefits its outlook, it is able to offer support to others when needed. Broad-mindedness is a wonderful characteristic. Quick to find humor in situations, it is generally warm and fun to be around. Deep down, it believes in the basic goodness of people and of life in general, and this basic and natural attitude helps it to attract positive circumstances and to make good connections. One of its best qualities is tolerance. Usually, it doesn't take life too seriously in the sense that it believes in having a bit of fun. Its hunches are more often than not bang-on. It is frank, honest, optimistic and generous. It likes good cooking, its comforts. Its friendships are sincere. It is a worker and knows how to surround itself with the right people: It is appreciated at work.

-182 Opposition Moon - Saturn When Moon is in hard aspect to Saturn in the natal chart, natives need to learn to trust others more. Fear keeps them from fully enjoying personal relationships, and fear is behind the occasional rigidity that they express. When they let themselves receive nurture or care from others, an inner voice cautions them that it might not be sincere, long-lasting, or enough! There can be some reluctance about becoming a parent, but once taken on, these people don't take their responsibility lightly. Emotional reticence is the main theme of these aspects. Many people with this aspect had a lot of conditions placed on the love they received in early childhood. They tend to expect the same later in life. With hard Saturn aspects, individuals are often plagued with doubts, not only about the self but about what to expect from life itself. The problem is that expecting difficulties or negative situations creates an aura around them that perpetuates the problem. They must work hard at positive thinking and expecting more from life. Ironically, many people with hard Saturn aspects can be quite sarcastic, skeptical, and rigid in manner. This is essentially a defense mechanism designed to protect themselves from harshness in the world. It is extremely likely that they feel neglected because they perceive it in the first place, and later expect it, to be the case. There's a vicious circle going on here that can only be broken when the patterns created by negative conditioning are broken. Adjusting one's perceptions and expectations is the key to breaking out of these negative patterns. Otherwise, natives of hard Moon-Saturn aspects will live life feeling left out--attracting circumstances that perpetuate a feeling of deep unhappiness and dissatisfaction.

-149 Opposition Moon - Uranus It has a feverish, non-constructive restlessness. It is too susceptible. Its life is full of change. It is irritable and stubborn at times due to an inner restlessness that is hard to satisfy. It has difficulty concentrating on a job. Nervous strain. Its friendships are like its professional and love life - sometimes unstable. There is a strong need for closeness, but when people get too close, it gets cagey, as it values personal freedom just as much.

mercury in gemini

Mercury in Gemini people are generally quick-witted. They can come across as somewhat scattered, and this is mainly due to their eclectic interests. They seem to know a little about everything. Turn to Mercury in Gemini people for lots of facts and figures as well as broad knowledge. Their learning is a little superficial--they generally have too many interests to delve too deeply into any one. These people learn best in a stimulating environment. They get bored easily, but they are fast learners. Impressionable to a fault, Mercury in Gemini people pick up more from their environment than most, and they can process information at lightning speed! The restlessness of Gemini is especially obvious when Mercury is placed in the sign. There is a nervous energy here that is unmistakable.

Mercury in VIII It can be tormented at night. It likes research, investigations, inquiries. Studies well. It is fascinated with all that is unexplored, mysterious, taboo, secret, and psychological. Loves research and has a great mind. It wants to know the motivation behind what people do. May have a good mind for financial strategies. You speak with authority and others listen, having strong persuasive powers which should be used carefully. You tend to feel that everything we do and experience has a purpose. You have a great, investigative, and penetrating mind and you are excellent at developing strategies, as well as communicating them with others.

131 Conjunction Mercury - Mars It likes to discuss, likes polemic. It has good judgment and is determined. It is a worker and has lots of energy. It has a lively intelligence and goes to the heart of things. It is enthusiastic, incisive, and energetic in thought and speech. -18 Opposition Mercury - Saturn It is reserved, conservative, ambitious and stubborn. It might have problems expressing itself, particularly verbally, due to shyness or fear of criticism. Social success may be slow and laborious, but it does not give up easily and is patient. Whatever you say and write is self-censored to some degree. It's hard for you to pour out your emotions, no matter how emotional or needy you feel on the inside. This is because you are always aware of what others might think of you with what you say. You are careful with what you reveal to others. You make plenty of disclaimers, and often come across as negative or sarcastic without intending to. You often review conversations you have had with others, and you often kick yourself for saying something you didn't intend to, or for not saying something witty. There can be some feelings of insecurity about how you speak and communicate in general. Self-consciousness and hypersensitivity is experienced with regards to your intelligence and/or ability to get ideas across to others, especially in youth. You need plenty of positive feedback from others in order to feel more confident and less "blocked". Recognize that you are most likely harder on yourself about how you communicate than others are. Ask people close to you for an objective point of view. Chances are, they find you to be astute, intelligent, and an effective speaker or writer. We often tell our kids "don't worry about what others think", but telling this to a person with a hard Saturn aspects is not enough, nor is it realistic. They will worry. You rarely accept compliments whole-heartedly, yet you crave them and need them. Others around you tend to stop complimenting you, feeling that you either don't need compliments or don't want to hear them. Nothing can be further than the truth!

-240 Opposition Mercury - Uranus It likes polemic, to criticize and, above all, to contradict. It lacks diplomacy and tends to dissipate her energy. It cannot stay in the same place, likes change even if it means a backward step in its professional career. -23 Opposition Mercury - Neptune It makes errors of judgement, and lacks sincerity. It lets things happen, and is happy in its dreamworld. Confronted by reality, it is hesitant, incapable of being tested and falls back into its imaginary world. It might become a drug-taker.

venus in taurus

Love for Venus in Taurus centers on the physical world and creature comforts -- they revel in sensual surroundings. These people project themselves as solid and comfortable. In fact, something about their manner promises they will be satisfying lovers and partners. They need a certain measure of predictability and dependability in their relationships, even if their Sun is in the more spontaneous signs of Aries or Gemini. Venus in Taurus people can be possessive in love, and they are threatened by fast-paced, high-energy situations in the context of relationships and love. These are sensual partners who require lots of "hands-on" expressions of love. Their lovers may complain that Venus in Taurus can get a little too comfortable and settled. It's true that they resist change in their relationships, but even when they seem stuck in a groove, you can always reassure yourself by remembering that they are constant partners. Pleasing Venus in Taurus involves emphasizing your loyalty, and their worth to you. You may need to give in to them in love matters, because they won't readily give in to you! Get physical with them; do comfortable things. Avoid pushing them in love -- give them plenty of time. You will probably need to cultivate patience if you are in a relationship with Venus in Taurus. Remember to be simple and natural -- Taurus will appreciate it. Promise them a comfortable, cozy time. Love arrives slowly, without passion but with force.

Venus in VI It may be devoted to sick or poor people. Might work in a medical or social setting, where it meets its partner, who is a great help professionally. Your expressions of love and affection are practical and helpful. Being of service to a partner is especially important to you. In fact, you might go to great lengths to be available at all costs to a loved one. While you may not be flowery or showy when it comes to expressing love, you show your love by your availability, rendering services, doing practical things for a loved one, and other thoughtful "little" things. Many of you are talented at design work, as you appreciate and pay much attention to all of the little parts that make up a whole, with the goal of finding order and harmony in these systems. If you are not careful, you might pass up on true love opportunities in favor of relationships that serve a practical purpose in your life, or out of fear that you might not find better. Selling yourself short may be something that keeps you from going after what and who you want.

-141 Opposition Venus - Pluto In an attempt to control the outcome of a love relationship, or the loved one's feelings, you can turn to manipulative games. Even if you do "succeed" at it, there is never a feeling that you've won someone over for who you are, and this feeds a vicious cycle that you should try to avoid getting yourself into. Your feelings are intense, and even extreme, when it comes to love. You might attract intense relationships that have love-hate themes as a result. You are passionate when you love, definitely, but also passionate when you hate. You easily put pressure on your partner, as you expect much loyalty and honesty in your intimate relationships. Be careful not to let your relationships get to a point where your partner is superfluous and you are working through your own inner demons through him or her. Certainly, you will learn much about yourself through your relationships, and you may not always like what you see. You will meet yourself (the "darker" side or inner demons) through your relationships, and it will be critical that you recognize it as your own "material" and not project it onto your partner. Letting go of a relationship can be hard for you to do, especially if Venus is in a fixed sign (Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, or Aquarius). -152 Opposition Venus - Ascendant It goes to excess in her pleasures, frequents doubtful company. It lacks good taste. It is very spendthrift, but spreads its money around its circle. Its friends are more self-interested than sincere.

mars in cancer

This position inclines toward passive-aggressiveness. These people seem to resist change and to shy away from direct confrontations. They need to feel secure before they act. As a result, they can appear rather slow at times. Their motto is "The best offence is defense". They may appear weak to some, but they can be very strong. Their strength lies in their tenaciousness. Their sex drive can be very tied up with emotional need. At their best, they turn others on with a protective, almost therapeutic way about them. The protective nature of Cancer is best expressed when Mars in Cancer natives are turning the energy outward -- when they are being the protectors of others. Turning it inwards is when there are problems. They must avoid over-sensitivity and self-protection when it comes to sex. Some Mars in Cancer people are especially turned on by the thought of creating a baby. These people are threatened by indifference. They can be argumentative and manipulative. Their energy levels are variable, and they can appear to move rather slowly. They have defensive reactions and bursts of emotional displays when they feel cornered. With reassurance and confidence, these natives are protective, helpful, and dependable in the long haul. They prefer to handle situations peacefully and humanely.

Mars in VIII Sexually very powerful, it is also capable of tremendous focus and hard work. Sexually intense and deep. Is adept at professions requiring research, strategy, uncovering truths, and analysis. Arguments may occur over inheritance. -3 Opposition Mars - Uranus It is full of contradictions. It is original, tending to the eccentric, violent, headstrong, impatient and irascible. It fights to the bitter end to overcome hurdles, and has the strength to overcome them.

-61 Opposition Mars - Neptune This is a challenging position, as you have difficulty trusting in your ability to go after things that you want in a direct manner. It may also be that you have difficulty pinpointing what it is that you want, or that part of you doesn't feel you deserve it due to a basic lack of self-confidence. You fear rejection as well as criticism, and often use roundabout means to go after what you want. Your imagination is so powerful that it can be hard to trust your instincts. You easily imagine things going wrong, just as you easily fantasize about good things! Your desire nature is strong yet also very suggestible. You're attracted to mysteries and intrigue. Sexual experimentation is likely, as you are forever addicted to sensuality and unusual or perhaps even what many would consider perverted sexual scenarios. However, your sensual appetite might be much like a bottomless pit, and you could find yourself forever in a state of wanting more, tiring of regular sexual scenarios quickly, and endlessly searching for the next sensation. If an addiction to fantasy is present, you can find yourself constantly chasing a new and more complicated fantasy. It is only when you get into touch with your heart and discover your true desires that you realize that sensations are merely sensations--not deeply satisfying or fulfilling. Fears of sexual inadequacy can be great with this position, and you may either deny yourself as a result, or overcompensate, seeking out experiences in which you are pretty much assured positive feedback. Some of you will experience both of these extremes in your lifetime. Although you can be very creative at keeping your motives and personal agenda hidden--in fact, many of you seem on the surface of things to be quite gentle and yielding--you might eventually become resentful if you feel the need to resort to sneakiness in order to get what you want out of life. If you do feel resentment for giving up your power to someone else, learn to avoid giving it up unless you truly understand that you are doing it for yourself, and not for someone else. Resentments have a way of building and distorting themselves into ugly matter if you don't deal with them properly and directly. You are often passive-aggressive in your approach to others, and this can cause a lot of problems in your life. You are usually found chasing a dream... or a fantasy. The former is probably the better path. Adopting a more direct and assertive approach to life is something that you should be working towards. You will need to get over your feelings of guilt when you do adopt this approach. Learning to take responsibility for your actions, and to avoid blaming others for failures, is important. At your worst, you can be disorganized in your approach to life, easily procrastinating and lacking follow-through when you do begin a task. Some of the most important lessons you need to learn in life are self-control, self-assertion, and trust in yourself. At your best, you are a creative person with a powerful imagination and great stores of compassion.

24 Trine Mars - Pluto It is ambitious, has a great capacity for work, has self-confidence and goes to the end of its plans.

jupiter in aries

It attracts the most good fortune when it takes the lead, initiates, inspires, and demonstrates enthusiasm and courage. Believes in the power of positivity, that life is what you make of it. Loves competition, doing things independently. Jupiter in V It likes games and distractions. It has passion which lights up its days. It is lucky in love, but also professionally, with pleasant working conditions and duties. It loves its children and gets much enjoyment from them. 63 Trine Jupiter - Saturn It is serious, patient, honest, hard-working, orderly. Its judgment is good and it thinks things over. It pursues its objectives to the bitter end, usually knowing when to choose the right moment. It is upright and respects the law. -46 Square Jupiter - Lilith It will ruin herself in order to please its partner. On the sexual level, it will go to considerable effort to please its partner. In order to possess the partner more, it will ruin herself financially to get whatever the partner might want. In spite of all that, the partner is never entirely satisfied. It will be very disappointed in love.

saturn in sagittarius

It has its own way of thinking about a subject, it has its own ideas about things. It respects society and society’s rules guide its conduct. Weaknesses: hard, unforgiving, rigorous, insensitive and sometimes inhuman. A limited and narrow mind. Saturn in II If it is rich, will always give the impression of being in financial difficulties. If it is broke, it gives the same impression - this time with reason. It fears being without money, and may be especially cautious with possessions and finances as a result. 90 Conjunction Saturn - Uranus It knows how to be on top of the situation. It perseveres, is determined but ingenious and original. It is very practical. It proceeds slowly, but is always bound to achieve its objectives in the end.

uranus in sagittarius

It is shy, delicate but proud, bold and lively. Uranus in II It has a lot of flair. It is unreliable at work, always ready for change. It must have an out-of-the-ordinary job, in which case all goes well: otherwise, it will often change jobs and will have financial problems.

neptune in capricorn

It is discerning, wise and sensible. Neptune in II It may prefer not to attach too much value to money, but if this is overdone, there can be quite a few problems in life concerning money and ownership. It might make money through artistic pursuits, but must avoid the potential pitfalls of putting too much faith in ideas that don't have enough grounding in reality. Financial advice is important to obtain.

84 Sextile Neptune - Pluto

pluto in scorpio

Great sexual activity. [LMAO THIS IS LITERALLY ALL IT SAID??? I’M LAUGHIN] 7 Conjunction Pluto - AscendantIt has will-power and ambition, and likes to have its own way.

[imaginativemarvel]

The Color Red - Steve Rogers x Reader - Soulmate!AU

Summary: Everyone is born colorblind, that meaning you live a black and white life. The main 6 colors in a persons life are the classics. Red, orange, yellow, green, blue and purple. Each time you live a significant moment of your life, a new color comes into play.

Red: Your Soulmate Orange: Worst Enemy Yellow: First Heartbreak Green: Biggest Role-Model Blue- Best Friend Purple: Self-Acceptance

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Word count: 3.2k

Warning: Brock Rumlow is his typical asshole self in this one-shot, otherwise I think it's fine besides cursing and such.

A/N: Requests are open and I absolutely am open to anything! I love speaking to you guys and receiving any type of feed back so please don't hesitate to send an ask, message or comment (:

« New Updated Masterlist (with future works!!) »

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Most people were born with at least one visible color; some were lucky enough to have two. You always felt left out in most things people experienced, why? Because the first time you experienced any color was at the age of 12. Sure, you never mentioned it to anyone but eventually people would figure out that you were living in a world of grey.

"Hey, (Y/N). Can you pass me the Purple, Blue and Green markers?"

Hesitating right on spot, you had no idea which were which. You slowly picked up the first three markers to see if there was any type of label on them. Assuming they were old because the labels were wearing off, you turned to your friend before handing her the three markers.

"This is Yellow, not purple." She lifted the second marker before waving it into your face.

"I'm sorry I can't...." Your hand immediately went to grab the marker but she pulled it out of hands reach.

"You can't see it?"

"I.... I can't see any colors." Your eyes trailed to the floor as she lifted up another grey marker and put it to your face.

"You can't see any color? Not even blue? I thought I was the your closest friend. Shouldn't you at least see blue?"

"You are! But I... I can't just make them pop up on my own free will, (Y/F/N). Maybe it'll come in the near future."

"It's because you don't consider me your closest friend, isn't it? Why do I even bother with you if you've pretended you were my best friend all this time? I mean you're the one who let me see the color blue, too."

"No- (Y/F/N)! It's not like that-"

"Forget it, (Y/N). Don't bother."

And in that moment, one of the markers in her hand had filled with a bright color you've never seen before. Your eyes drifted around the room as you saw pencils, desks and the light glowing above the room brighten up into a golden shade.

"No fucking way."

The next color was your favorite color you've came across; Blue. It was your first day of college, you had just turned 19. You thought back to the first time you laid eyes onto your best friend, at first you would have never guessed it was her, but the colors showed you otherwise.

You walked into your afternoon class before sitting at a double seated table alone. Class had started and 10 minutes after the very first lecture a brunette opened the door before apologizing for being late. She walked past the few open seats and plopped down into the open seat at your desk.

"I hope you don't mind; you look a lot more nicer than the rest." Her eyes drifted to the few people she passed up before her lips curved up.

"Oh no, don't worry. It's not like I kept the seat reserved for someone." A small hint of humor came out of your mouth as you giggled and she joined.

"Perfect!" She held her hand out to you as you smiled and accepted the offer. "I'm Wanda."

"(Y/N)."

Life wouldn't be the same without Wanda, she was one of the few people who were not only apologetic but accepting towards you; Considering you've only been able to see two colors of the six. Of course, at that moment, you could see all shades of yellow and blue but you couldn't see any mixtures, like green. You've never seen green, but everyone tells you it's one of the best.

It had been 3 years since you've met Wanda when you  finally got to witness and keep the mixture of the two current colors you possessed. Most people grew up seeing green, most people looked at their parents as their role models. But you didn't; instead you just substituted other things for parental figures, clearly none of them fit the slot. Well, until you met Clint.

You would have never met Clint if it weren't for Wanda, apparently she received the color green from him too. Wanda asked you to accompany her on a family and friend get together, so you did because she was your best friend. You would do anything for her.

"(Y/N). This is Clint, I've told you a lot about him, vise versa."

"Nice to meet you, (Y/N). I've heard a lot, but don't worry, only some were bad." He pulled you into a huge hug before giving you one of the most heartwarming smiles you've seen.

"Surprising, I'd expect them all to be bad. Don't worry she-" You stopped mid-sentence, earning a stare from Wanda and Clint.

His tie, it was slowly filling in with a new shade. It looked like blue, but not entirely. If you mixed both blue and yellow, you'd get this shade, it was what Wanda had talked about. Green.

"Your..... your tie. The grass... holy shit. It's green!"

"Damn, I sure am a role model for everyone, aren't I?"

You were so thankful for those two in your life, they brought you so much love and opportunity that you've never been offered before and you couldn't be more grateful. When time came around, you saw your most recent hue. The one you dreaded the most; Orange. It was fine though, because you had your two best friends by your side. If it weren't for them, you wouldn't know how to handle a situation like this.

"Wow, might I just say, those shorts look absolutely stunning on your figure. Of course they'd look better on my floor but... you know." The voice peered over your shoulder, the smell of alcohol hit your nose.

"Thanks, you know, if you're going to hit on a girl, I suggest using a compliment that's from 2017. Not 2005. I appreciate it though! But I'm here with my friends to get drunk and have fun, not for a one night stand." The snappy comeback gave him a scary look, you stood your ground though. You wouldn't let him get to you.

"I can always make an excuse up for you, this isn't my first rodeo, so how about it?" The same snarky smirk from before appeared on his face as he took a drink from the beer in his hand. At the same moment, his feet shifted closer and closer to your body.

"I'm not the one. Please back away from me."

"This isn't a suggestion or option, it's something you're going to do. For me." His voice became deeper, forcing and absolutely terrifying. His hand slowly slide up your leg before giving your thigh a squeeze.

"Get off me, asshole!" The moment you shoved him back and forced his grip off your leg, you felt a familiar presence. Somehow the scenery was different, and you couldn't put your finger on it. It's not that random orange things were just in your face saying that you had just experienced a new color but some random things around the room changed to a dark orange tint, almost not visible when you're already so used to a dark tint.

"Get off her or else you'll regret it, crossbones." A familiar voice came up to your side before shoving the mysterious man back.

"Clint it's fine, he's drunk. Let's just go." You grabbed his arm before slowly making your way to the entrance of the building.

As you were walking out the bar, you spotted two men playing pool with two woman. They hit ball after ball into each shot, but one ball stood out in particular. The balls five and thirteen, both painted with the color orange.

"Hey, Clint. Who was that?"

"Rumlow. Brock Rumlow."

The thing that frightened you the most was, like every case of someone meeting their worst enemy, they had many occasions where they'd be at the same place, same time. It was currently a quarter after 9 when Wanda and her new friend Natasha had offered you to tag along with them to a wedding, you had no plan so you didn't oppose.

Natasha was a bridesmaid while Wanda was just her date, who happened to have you as her date as well. They both were wearing beautiful white gowns while you were wearing a fancy, purple bodycon. Now, you originally picked out a similar one in a navy blue shade but the girls protested that the purple one brought out the 'color in your eyes'. Despite you not being able to see the color purple, you reluctantly agreed.

You all finished quickly before heading to the church the vows would take place in. It took a while, like every church, but soon enough you found everyone attending the reception at the banquet down the street.

"Come on, (Y/N)! Let loose." Natasha grabbed your arms before swinging them back and forth in a dancing motion.

"I don't know, Nat. I don't know anyone here, what if I embarrass myself?" You swiftly let go of her hands and set them on your hips, glancing over your shoulder at Wanda who was hitting it up with some random guy.

"So what? You said so yourself, you don't know anyone here!" The red head pulls your attention back to her as she grabs your hands again and drags you out to the dance floor. "Fine, let's go!"

After a good 40 minutes of dancing horribly and mocking other people's dance moves, Wanda walked up with the man from earlier. By the time they came into arms length, Natasha screamed at the man with a smile and pulled him into a one-sided hug.

"Vision? I thought you said weddings weren't your thing?"

"Well, they're not. But Tony pecked at me to come until I agreed, and I mean it would be rude not to. He did create me, after all." He gave Natasha a smile before giving you a greeting nod.

"(Y/N), I've told you about vision, right?" Wanda nudges you with your elbow as a smile spreads across your face. Memories from months back replay in your head, thinking about all the things she mentioned about the man.

"It's about time I've met you! I'm (Y/N)."

"Oh, I know. I happened to be the one who went through Wandas files before she was hired at the Tower. Usually we go over the employer and their acquaintances and since she lived with you, you happened to be one. I suppose that's all I know, though." He spoke in a stern and serious tones while using his hands to elaborate some words.

"Wow, she hasn't mentioned me once to you?" A smirk appeared on your face as you saw the surprising hesitation and stuttering come from the mans mouth.

"N-No! She has it's just-"

"Nothing new?"

"Uh, yes. Precisely." Wanda rested her hand on his shoulder before giggling and receiving a smile from him.

"Don't sweat it, from what I've heard, I already like you." He gave you a heartwarming smile before turning his head behind him with eyebrows furrowing.

"Vis? What is it?" Wanda looked in the same direction he was staring at, you and Nat quickly followed.

"Rumlow, He's here. I suppose Steve will take care of it. They aren't the best friends." He looked back at you three before responding to Wanda's question.

"Rumlow? As in Brock Rumlow?" Once again you felt your head look over the crowed with a disgusted face. A familiar face was wearing a nice blue suit, his eye catching yours the moment you saw him as he gave you a creepy smile.

"Yes, do you know him?"

"Unfortunately." Vision sighed before looking through the crowd, probably for the man he named earlier that would take care of Rumlow. His name was called along with Wanda and Natasha, as you all glanced over you noticed it was the groom. They went to pull you toward Stark to greet you but you shook your head and claimed you needed to go to the restroom, so they said their goodbyes before you walked away from the group.

You continued to move throughout the crowd to the restroom when someone's hand had gripped onto your forearm, spinning you around forcefully. It was the one person you were trying to avoid; Brock. His nasty, signature smile was plastered on his face.

"If it isn't my best friend! Say, Clint isn't here, is he?" He pulled your arm forward, your bodies collided.

"Dude, give up. You're just a cunt who gets off on scaring women, you think this forceful side of yours will get me off or scare me enough to agree but I'm not afraid of you. Try me, asshole." You tilted your head towards him with a cruel glare, only to receive a low chuck.

"Can't blame me for trying, but you are quite hot when mad." The moment he finished his words, a force pulled him from your body and sent him tumbling backwards.

"Rumlow, you weren't invited here. I'm going to politely ask you to leave." A tall blonde man pulled you behind him in a protecting way, completely shocking Rumlow.

"Why? This girl is nothing to you. Why would you care?"

"Well, she's my girlfriend, my date tonight and I wouldn't want another mans hands on her and I doubt she would too, right doll?" His hand swiftly snaked around your waist but in a gentle manner. You leaned your side into his with a quick nod, playing along with what he was saying.

"So the Cap could settle for any woman and he settles for this under average, boring girl. Who knew?" His words stung, as much as you hated him and didn't care for his opinion, they still stung.

"Sure. I'm under average and boring but were you not the one who was just trying to get in my pants?" The grip on your waist tightened a little when you agreed to his insults, only receiving a humored look from the pervert.

"Tony didn't invite you, Pepper didn't invite you and I know you didn't walk through those doors with anyone who could back you up and said they invited you, therefore, you shouldn't be here. I'm going to ask one more time, leave. Or else I'll kick your ass right now, while of course teaching you how to speak to my girl, respectfully. How does that sound?" The mans voice got deeper by each word, making the threat sound like a nightmare. You slowly gripped his jacket with your hand before giving Rumlow a smile.

"The girl couldn't put up a fight even if she was forced to, you'll be done with her once you're done with me." He gave you both a defeated look before swallowing with nervousness.

"Well, she has to put up with you so, yeah. Pretty damn amazing in my eyes, I mean, I can barley do that and she seems to being doing it at ease. Now go." The corner of his lip slid up before he gave you a glance and pointed at the door for Brock.

Brock's eyes shifted from the mans, to yours and then to the hand that was gripping your hip. With a sluggish movement, he put the weight of his body on his heels before rolling his eyes and exiting the building in defeat.

"Thank you so much for that, if it weren't for you... I don't know how that would turn out." As soon as Brock was out of sight, you turned and removed the contact from both of your bodies.

"Don't worry, I had an eye out on him anyways but the moment he stepped up to you I..." He gave you a small smile before scratching the back of his neck.

"Saved the day? You are a hero like they say, huh?" You voluntarily ended his sentence, complimenting him in the process.

"Actually I just.. I uh..."

"You just...?"

"I didn't intentionally want for this to happen it's just I saw Natasha with you and the rest earlier before Brock came in and then after I saw you I saw Vision but his face was a different color and that was the first time I have seen that color-" He began to ramble for looking over his shoulder and pointing at Vision. Your eyes wandered, looking at the man too. You looked closer before realizing half his face wasn't a dark shade, it was a bright hue.

"Holy shit. Vision! His face is-"

"Red."

"Wait, does that mean-"

"Well we both happened to notice the color after seeing each other for the first time... so yeah, that would only mean..."

"That we're soulmates?" Your eyes widen as you stared at the man who mimicked your expression. His hand slowly raised to his mouth before furrowing his eyebrows towards you.

"This is crazy, I saw you from afar and thought how beautiful you were and I didn't think for a split second that I could ever be with you because you seem just too ... good, normal for me but then I saw Vision. You were the only new face I've noticed so I just assumed, and then Brock came up to you and I don't know. I got protective." The once stern and serious man let out a cheeky smile with a tint of pink covering his cheeks.

"And we haven't even introduced ourselves yet. I'm (Y/N). (Y/N) (Y/L/N)."

"Beautiful name for a beautiful lady, huh?" He gave you a shine of his white teeth before you playfully slapped his bicep, blushing from his compliment. "I'm Steve Rogers. And you my friend, were the ticket to see my last color."

"Really? That's so cool! I wish I could say that." The moment you revealed that you haven't seen the main 6 colors of life, his eyes widen in shock before bombarding you with questions.

"Wait, you haven't seen all of them? Which ones are you missing out on? If it's more than one color then I'm going to make it my lives mission to get them for you." You giggled at his hopeless attempt at flirting that for some reason was working.

"Ironically, the color of my dress. Purple."

"Self-acceptance, huh? It took me a while too but I got there. And with you being my soul-mate and probably the prettiest girl in the world, I hope I can help change that." You smiled ear to ear before tilting your head and giving him the question he wanted to answer.

"And how exactly will you do that?"

"Well, you can always accompany me to a dance while I tell you everything I love about you so far, and then you can tell me things I don't know so I can name off more things I love about you." Before giving you a chance to answer, his hand gravitated towards yours before slowly pulling you to the dance floor.

"Always this smooth with the ladies, Rogers?"

"Only for the ones who show me red, Darlin'."

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡ Tags:

@gallifreyansass @walkingtravesty97 @g0back2bed @crazy4thewinbros @iamwarrenspeace @nadtandy @feelmyroarrrr @xabeautifultragedyx @ginger-wayward-assbutt

sorry for doing this all so late??? jk???

[hellssecretary-blog1]

Your obedient servant, asshole

File and King Dice duke it out like adults they are.

----

File picked up the small note tuckered between papers she collected on her table.

"Dear Folder,These were past due yesterday. If I found another more sloppy work I would have to talk to Boss, count yourself lucky I haven't done so. Consider this as show of my good will.

Best regards Your obedient servant Dice"

She crushed it in her hand, fully knowing these papers weren't nowhere in her vicinity whole week. That slimy sleazy cube. --

Dice stared at note Wheezy delivered to him. He could see retreating blue vest on other side of the room.

"Dearest Ki... Dice,

should I remind you, that if you want work done, you have to deliver it to the one who should do it? Your demands were met with satisfaction non the less. Also I would recommend buying more whiskey as my data shows spike in consumption. Just polite reminder.

Best regards Your obedient servant File"

He glared at the offending piece of paper and then turned to barman to talk about the whiskey consumption. -- Small paper plane landed before File as she was sitting at bar, talking with bartender and filling her employee information, that needed to be updated.

"Dear Folder,

no need to remind me on my duties, unlike some paper head I know. But I would like to remind you, that you have your work and I have mine. Don't try to take on too much, or should I remind you what happened the last time? That was quite amusing to see.

Best regards Your obedient servant KING Dice."

Only small twitch showed her rising irritation, before she returned to her previous task. Maybe her questions were bit more snappy than before, maybe not. Bartender just tried to hide his smile. -- Dice pulled out his handkerchief and small paper note fell from his pocket. When he picked it up, only his years of dealing with people saved him from swearing out loud.

"Dearest Dice <3,

I wasn't aware you know more paper headed people than me. Should I be jealous? Or should I draft new working contract for them, listing all their duties as you seem to be concerned by their lack of diligence. As for taking on too much work, should I remind you I was 25 and managed to last whole month, before completely shutting down from exhaustion. And I was finishing my academical degree on top. I'm sure it must have been hilarious to witness it. But should I remind you who came begging to take back my work afterwards? Even though I was still recovering from my sickness?

Best regards Your obedient servant secretary Folder File."

He stared at the mocking heart behind his name, wondering if punching her would be considered bad taste. He put it away, smiled at the guest he was scamming and pretended nothing happened. -- File fumed as she discovered paper flower at her table, everybody knew she hated when notes were handled to her folded in any shape or form.

"Dear Folder,

it's amazing how much you care for somebody unknown to you. Yet my concerns were aimed at you and you alone. Seems like your contract needs revision. Have to admit, you shutting down right in middle of meeting with Boss and faceplanting right in to fiery pit was best thing that happened in several years. It saddens me that I wasn't able to catch in on film. As for me begging you to take back your job, that was order from Boss. Don't read too much in to it, but given how much I know you, that is impossible. So enjoy your disillusions.

Best regards Your obedient servant Manager King Dice."

Folding it back in to flower shape, File set it on floor gently, before she crushed it with her feet. It felt so good imagining Dice's hand instead of the innocent paper. -- Dice looked up from his own paperwork, as the hellish secretary walked in, rather impressive stack of papers in her arms. He just shuddered at the amount that she most likely is going to dump on him. Instead she just put small piece of paper in front of him, turned on her heel and left without single word.

"Dearest Dice,

I assure you my contract doesn't need revision, update or anything else to be done to it. It's updated automatically since it was made by myself after negotiation with Boss all those years ago. Thank you for your concern, they were horribly misplaced though.Shame, truly a shame that you couldn't catch my shameful fall, yet I still have pictures of you in that lovely maid outfit Devil forced on you, due to some misfortune that managed to befall on you. If I remember correctly it was because some patrons managed to set several tables on fire before you could apprehend them. Wonder how could they get such fire power to do so. We should never know.

Best regards, Your obedient servant Devil's secretary Folder File."

He reread it several times. Did she indirectly admitted it was her who helped to set Casino on fire when he was watching. Was she that petty?

Squinting at the paper he noticed small arrow. Turned the paper to see PS. "PS: Don't read in to it too much. I was with Boss at the incriminating time. Love, File."

He torn the paper in to pieces. -- File was enjoying rare meal and humming to herself as she was reading book while forking down rice with some sort of sauce. Her tranquility was interrupted when Dice showed up, slammed something down and stormed away.

"Dear Folder,

so nice to know your contract is only in your head. That picture is going to meet swift end, or so I swear you will find your latest writing creation posted all over the Inkwell isles. Hopeful you know what I mean, it was rather funny read, given you don't have any imagination. Who knew that stoic old maid File likes fantasy novels?

Best regards Your obedient servant Devil's manager King Dice."

She stared at it and felt color darken her cheeks. That scoundrel! He found out her stash of stupid ideas, that needed to be taken out for her to be able to focus on anything else beside them. The note ended as bookmark. -- Later that same day Dice was having nice smoke outside, when File marched past him, leaving small paper flutter down in her wake for Dice to pick it up.

"Dearest Dice,

how long did it take for you to come up with that pun? Or did somebody else help you with it? It seems more elaborate than your normal quips. I really want to talk to the person who helped you with it.As for my writing, hope you got copies, since paper that was used for its creation came from my head. You really should come up with better hiding place. I'm going to have fun with burning it.

Best regards Your obedient servant Devil's hellish secretary Folder File.

PS: Left something for you to read in meantime."

When King Dice looked in his hiding place in unused piano, he found children's picture book about colors. -- File was just about to have a lunch when she noticed there was only piece of paper on her plate.

"Dear Folder,

I might come to you are a surprise but it was me who came up with that pun. But what comes to me as surprise is that you know what pun is and noticed one. Bravo, maybe your sense of humor was not amongs the causalities of your poisoning attempt.Shame, but what I read will never leave me. It was enlightening to see you know how o use magic of great proportions.

Best regards Your obedient servant Devil's charming manager King Dice."

Now the secretary was hungry and angry. Dice was about to get it. -- File stomped to Dice, wordlessly glaring at him over his desk, before she slid piece paper over to him and left his office.

"Dearest and beloved Ego Dice,

there is one thing to question my intelligence, social skills and even fashion. I know I'm average looking at best. Shut in and bad at talking to people. But when you mess with my food and leave me hungry for rest of the day, that is where I draw the line. There was only few things I was looking forward to eat and you took that away. Hope you will appreciate how big those pictures of you are.

Simply die Your obedient servant hungry Devil's hellish secretary Folder File."

Dice smirked to himself. And then it dawned on him. She had pictures of him? What kind of... he stopped when he heard laughter from Casino and briskly walked out. Patrons had rather large pictures of him in various embarrassing situations, outfits and in File's clothes, when he and her were tasked by Boss to do each others job for a week. In each others clothes. Worst was all those pictures were taken out of context, none was given, so everybody thought it was willingly taken.

That was low and blow to his pride. It would rook some time before he collected all pictures, only to discover she went all out and spread them over Inkwell as well. -- File was finally able to hunt down some food, enjoying the nibble when King Dice stormed over to her, slamming his hand down, snatching her granola bar and stormed away. She was stunned. On note he left on the table was written only few things.

"Dear Ego trip File,

that was low, even for you. From now on, you can buy your own food.

Best Regards Your obedient servant pissed Devil's charming manager King Dice."

When she peaked in kitchen cooks just shook their heads and shooed her out. She didn't have any other option than to go shopping. And talk to people while still hungry as entire Hell. -- They were both sitting before Devil on monthly meeting. File to record the meeting, Devil an Dice doing all the talking. But File was distracted by her hunger and Dice was still trying to live down the humiliation from all those pictures.

Both were glaring at each other, bile rising in their mouths at the mere presence of the other. It didn't take long for File to pull paper from her head and slip it to Dice, as Devil turned away from them, pulling out Deal from cabinet behind him.

"King Ego,

thanks to you I'm banned from every shop on Inkwell. Without money and food.

Go die Your obedient servant mad hungry Devil's hellish secretary Folder File"

Dice glared at her, before smirking. He tore the paper with shrug, he could care less about her struggles.

In retaliation File pulled another paper from her head, this one with dark smirk and put it on Devil's desk. It was clear it was a picture of Dice in King's regalia, sitting on Devils throne chair. Surely something that would make their boss angry.

"That's not fair, File." Dice hissed as he tried to snatch the picture away, but the secretary kept it pinned to the desk with her fingers. Both trying to not to make any ruckus, so they wouldn't alert Devil, who was taking his sweet time to find the Deal, he wanted to discuss.

If both were paying attention, they would notice that Devil was already watching them with huge grin on his face.

"All is fair when you play with my food, Dice." File hissed back with venom. "You are overly dramatic. You could take some from pantry!" Dice leaned closer, his fingers still tugging at the offending picture.

"I would, if somebody didn't put lock on it month prior and didn't have only key to it, dick." Snapping back, File too leaned closer to be hear over her growling stomach.

"Well I wouldn't put lock on it, if somebody didn't steal food from it. As you know, your numbers told us that!" Dice was furious, She was blaming him from something so idiotic.

"That still didn't change the thin, there is only one key!" She glared as hunger pain shoot though her body. Her grip was failing.

"Cry me a river. You bought this on yourself."

"You started this childish pass it note!"

"You continued!"

"Because I had no words how stupid it was!"

"And showing everybody my embarrassing photos was smart? File you are..."

"I dare you to finish that statement." Before Dice could finish, he had wooden sword in his face, with orange eyed File fuming and glaring at him.

"Stupid beyond belief." Dice himself took out his cards, ready to defend himself.

Both adults were ready to tear each other apart when laughter interrupted their escalating argument. Devil was having best day in long time and laughed at expense of his employees.

"Ya both stupid. Sit down and let wrap this up. As much as I enjoy your pissed squabbles and scuffles you are working. Finish it in your free time." He ordered.

Dice and File sat down, still hatefully glaring at each other. -- The meeting was wrapped quickly. The secretary and Manager disappeared quickly after it. Next day they showed with poorly hidden black eyes and bruises. File even had cracked glasses.

Both refused to talk about, talk to each other and it took almost a month before their anger simmered down enough to silently work with each other again.

Much to amusement of everybody around. unless you counted Mr Wheezy who was the one who was passing messages between the two.

Devil decided he needed to mess with his two employees more often as he shuffled through pictures of them two duking it out.

[syrupwit]

Letter for Multifandom Horror Exchange

Hello there, and welcome to my letter for Multifandom Horror Exchange 2020! I appreciate that you’ve taken the time to read this letter. I hope that it will provide you with clarification, inspiration, or at the very least a bit of entertainment. Although I’ve written more for some sections and less for others, rest assured that I would be super excited to receive a gift for any of my requested fandoms, characters, pairings, or horror types.

Please see the table of contents below:

Likes

DNWs

Fandom: House (1977)

Fandom: Invader Zim

Fandom: The Magnus Archives

Fandom: Too Many Cooks (2014 Short)

-

Likes

A long list of my general likes can be found here.

When it comes to horror, I tend to prefer psychological explorations, suspense, and disturbing implications to explicit gore and violence, although I’m definitely not opposed to more graphic content. I love ominous atmospheres; building, lingering senses of dread; and landscapes and environments that interact with and express the characters’ fears, anxieties, and griefs. I especially love horror with supernatural elements -- ghosts and hauntings, monsters and cryptids, eldritch deities and their cultists, magic and magic users. I’m also a big fan of cosmic horror, and the sense that characters are pitted against amoral, indifferent forces that might not even recognize them as significant enough to be hostile towards but that are nonetheless damaging to human life. Additionally, I really like dark comedy, gallows humor, and horror with a more comedic / parodic / satirical slant.

While I typically prefer hopeful or bittersweet endings for my requested characters and pairings, please go for it if you have a great idea with a darker ending.

Some horror media I have really enjoyed but am not requesting for this exchange include the short stories of M. R. James and JS Le Fanu; William Hope Hodgson’s Carnacki, the Ghost-Finder stories; Clark Ashton Smith’s Averoigne stories; “The Night Ocean” by R. H. Barlow and H. P. Lovecraft; the connected-ish novels The Red Tree and The Drowning Girl by Caitlin R. Kiernan; the parody / pastiche novels of A. Lee Martinez; My Best Friend’s Exorcism by Grady Hendrix; and the movies Suspiria (1977 version -- haven’t seen the new one yet), The Others (2001), and Kwaidan (1965). Also I really love Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace. I don’t know if listing all that helps, but there it is.

-

Do Not Want (DNW)

Underage sex

Character or ship bashing

Hate speech or in-depth onscreen depictions / discussions of bigotry

Harm to pet animals, or any graphic animal harm (fighting a giant evil wolf or something is fine)

Characters having consensual sex when they are not attracted to each other

Noncon that goes against a character’s in-fic orientation

Bestiality

Scat

Necrophilia

Sexual activity involving worms / spiders / insects

-

FANDOM: HOUSE (1977)

Requested Fanwork Types: Fic -- Not Emphasizing Sexual Content

Requested Horror Types: Dark Fantasy, Folk Horror, Gothic Horror, Psychological Horror

Requested Characters/Pairings: Auntie & Gorgeous, Auntie/Fantasy, Kung Fu/Sweet

If you are not yet familiar with House or are looking for a refresher, this fanvid by AbsoluteDestiny hits most of the high points: Rock Lobster [YouTube link]. The basic plot is that seven girls visit their classmate’s aunt in the countryside for summer vacation. While initially charmed by the aunt’s quaint manners and old-fashioned home, they soon discover that something is very wrong. Things get weirder and weirder as more of the girls disappear and the aunt’s past is revealed. Innovative art design, a bangin soundtrack, and a kaleidoscopic array of surreal, absurd events and images make this film a memorable, exuberantly strange experience. Also, the aunt is hot, and you can quote me on that.

*** PLEASE NOTE THAT THE FOLLOWING RELATIONSHIP SECTIONS INCLUDE MINOR SPOILERS ***

Relationship: Auntie & Gorgeous

I’d love to learn more about the dynamic between Gorgeous and her aunt. How long had Auntie planned to prey on / possess her? Did they truly have any interactions while Auntie was alive? After the film’s ending, is there anything next for them? I’m a big fan of Subtle Menace and Vague Yet Troubling Implications, so scenes of Gorgeous going about her daily life while receiving odd letters from her aunt absolutely would not go amiss. And what’s up with the cat?

Relationship: Auntie/Fantasy

The postwar generation gap and feelings of alienation between younger/older people are major themes in House. I think this finds a lot of expression in the relationship between Auntie and Fantasy, Gorgeous’s best friend who is prone to daydreaming and ill-equipped to grasp the full tragedy of Auntie’s life. One of the concluding scenes of the film involves a possessed-by-Auntie Gorgeous holding Fantasy’s head to her breast and petting her hair while she cries; I guess that’s just very interesting to me. I love UST and ominousness and weirdness, so please go for it if you have an idea that involves any of those things for this pairing. 

Relationship: Kung Fu/Sweet

These two are just cute, and a little sad. Kung Fu is the action girl of the friend group, and Sweet is a gentle, polite girl who Kung Fu feels she has to protect. Unfortunately Sweet gets attacked by futons and trapped in a clock, and then Kung Fu is eaten by a lamp. What might happen in an AU where they survive, or where the house consumes the courses of its meal in a different order? Is there a “wandering through dreamland” element to the nightmare dimension where they’re trapped at the end? Perhaps the body horror from the movie is played straight, and Kung Fu’s head and legs continue to move independently of each other though they share the same mind (agh). Who knows?

-

FANDOM: INVADER ZIM

Requested Fanwork Types: Fic -- Not Emphasizing Sexual Content, Fic -- Emphasizing Sexual Content

Requested Horror Types: Institutional Horror, Paranormal Horror, Science-Fiction Horror, Survival Horror

Requested Characters/Pairings: Dib/Zim

Like a good chunk of people in the fandom right now, I had my teenage love for this show revived by last summer’s movie. There’s something irresistible to me about the blend of snappy comedy, unapologetic pessimism, and hints of a more complicated universe that we just barely get to see. For this exchange, I’d be thrilled with a story that retains the lighter elements of canon, as well as something that explores a darker take on things. I haven’t read any of the comics yet, but feel free to include stuff from them if you like.

Relationship: Dib/Zim

Apparently this is my OTP. Yeah, I don’t know either. The enemies to frenemies or lovers dynamic is one of my favorites. I particularly enjoy these two as outcasts who fruitlessly seek validation from indifferent or hostile societies via their rivalry when they’re the ones who really understand each other best. I prefer their relationship to end up a positive thing for both of them, if with some rough territory along the way. Like a good chunk of ZADR fandom, I prefer this ship aged up to late teens or young adults, but feel free to write them canon age as well -- just no underage sex, please.

For each type of horror I’ve requested, here are some ideas I have:

Institutional Horror: The world of Invader Zim is full of unpleasant and draconian institutions -- for example, the Crazy House for Boys, or Dib’s school with its underground classrooms. Irken society itself is one big dystopian horror-fest on pretty much all levels.

Paranormal Horror: The supernatural is another canonical feature of this universe. <3 Does Dib get in over his head investigating strange phenomena? Does he raise the walking dead again, get grounded for it, and have no choice but to stand by helplessly while his zombies overtake the city? Does Zim acquire an unwanted tenant in the form of a ghost, or a mysterious artifact that promises to grant all his wishes? There are so many options.

Science-Fiction Horror: Haunted ships and abandoned research stations, the yawning emptiness of deep space, eldritch monsters beyond the stars... Dib and Zim can encounter all of these and pretend not to be scared out of their wits by them. Also! Killer robots, sentient computer viruses, experiments gone wrong? Anything you like.  

Survival Horror: These two would make great survival horror protagonists on their own, but I also really like the idea of them being thrown in a situation where they have to work together to make it out. I really like the idea of Zim and Dib being pitted against a more serious antagonist or challenge than those they encounter in canon, and of them realizing that, despite the many canonical instances of mutual attempted murder, neither actually wants the other to die. (And then getting out with a new understanding of their importance to each other! Or ending miserably. Either way.)

-

FANDOM: THE MAGNUS ARCHIVES

Requested Fanwork Types: Fic -- Not Emphasizing Sexual Content, Fic -- Emphasizing Sexual Content

Requested Horror Types: Cosmic/Lovecraftian Horror, Folk Horror, Institutional Horror, Paranormal Horror, Religious Horror

Requested Characters/Pairings: Gerard Keay, Mary Keay & Gertrude Robinson, Mary Keay/Gertrude Robinson, Trevor Herbert & Julia Montauk, Sasha James/Michael, Martin Blackwood/Peter Lukas

As a rule, I’m not into podcasts. I sat down with the first episode of this series about a month ago and became obsessed within two days. (I am now caught up through Season 5.) I love the unique worldbuilding, and the way the horror feels really genuinely horrifying and modern and immediate even when it’s one of those rad historical episodes, and all the characters, and the plot, and aaaahhhhhhh I love it. I’d just really like to hear more about this universe (and characters), and all the terrible things that can happen in it (and to them).

Character: Gerard Keay

Poor, doomed Gerry Keay. I want to know more about his adventures! Canon divergence, pre-canon, something set nebulously present or post-canon -- I’m here for all of it. I ship him romantically with pretty much every character except his parents, and platonically with every character including his parents; in particular, I like him with Gertrude and Jon. If you’d like some slightly more specific prompts, here are a few:

Trevor and Julia using Gerard as a monster manual, pre-Season 3. Did they ever run into something he couldn’t identify?

AU where Jon keeps his page instead of destroying it.

Working or traveling with Gertrude, trying to relax after a taxing case but getting pulled into another one.

Teenage Gerard chasing Leitners and getting in over his head.

Relationship: Mary Keay & Gertrude Robinson | Mary Keay/Gertrude Robinson

Grouping the platonic and romantic ships together because I like both and am mostly just interested in seeing these two interact more. “Dubiously (a)moral older women on orthogonal sides of a conflict, also one of them semi-kills the other” is, like, a dynamic that could have been tailor-made for me.

Mary Keay is so deeply creepy -- her statement in “First Edition” gave me legitimate shivers. Her quest for power and attempts to control the Entities are really interesting to me, and I enjoy how they contrast with Gertrude’s more utilitarian, less openly self-serving approach. Gertrude, on the other hand… I just fuckin love Gertrude. The frail old lady exterior hiding a ruthless will and a spine of magically reinforced steel -- I swoon. (I should note that I really like stuff that explores the more vulnerable and messy sides of badass / competent characters, especially female characters. If Gertrude locks up her heart and throws away the key, etc., what could make it strain its chains...? Or, uh, something like that.)

Relationship: Trevor Herbert & Julia Montauk

Yes! Obnoxious monster hunters!! I’m intrigued by their intuitive understanding of each other and strong bond despite the age gap and different life experiences. Do the demands of the Hunt ever interfere with their partnership? What sorts of gnarly, gross, twisted, chilling, or darkly funny situations have they gotten into over the course of their travels? I love them as happy monsters in comic, if gruesome, circumstances, but I’d also be down for something exploring the darker or softer sides of their work and relationship.

Relationship: Sasha James/Michael 

I was mad interested by Michael’s introduction in “A Distortion,” and Sasha was so brave with him. I’m a huge sucker for the trope where a supernatural creature protects or helps a weak ordinary human, even if it’s for a price, and for any monster romance along those lines. Perhaps these two have other encounters between their first meeting and Sasha’s murder, or an alternate first meeting? Perhaps Michael rescues her from the Not!Them? Or perhaps, in an AU, Archivist!Sasha has a very different sort of relationship with the Distortion? Or something else...?!

Relationship: Martin Blackwood/Peter Lukas

A later addition, but I couldn’t help myself. I love how amiable and sensible Peter acts even as he’s carrying out dread errands, and I felt for poor Martin dealing with Peter’s weird corporate speak and technology issues. There’s so much potential for comedy, angst, and multi-layered horror with this pairing -- the Lonely is such a strangely seductive concept even as it’s terrifying, and Peter’s relationship to it is very interesting. Peter, himself, is very interesting. Martin, I’m just very fond of, all his courage and scheming and petulance (and codependent tendencies). I’m down for pretty much anything about this pairing.

-

FANDOM: TOO MANY COOKS (2014 SHORT)

Requested Fanwork Types: Fic -- Not Emphasizing Sexual Content

Requested Horror Types: Cosmic/Lovecraftian Horror, Killer Horror, Psychological Horror, Survival Horror

Requested Characters/Pairings: Character of Author’s Choice

The “Too Many Cooks” short can be watched for free on YouTube.

I remember watching this when it came out. I watched it again when I saw it in the nominations for this exchange, and yep, STILL CREEPY AS FUCK. ❤︎❤︎❤︎ I love the genre parodies in this short almost as much as the gradually eroding realities / intensifying horror and strangeness. I would love to hear more about this nightmare world and how an individual character might experience it. Really, I’m up for almost anything here. :D

[samantala-ako]

Ghosts.

A told me once that the Hindus don’t believe in ghosts, and when I thought about what that meant, I realized he must understand death and baggage differently than I do. Maybe that’s yet another advantage for those who have been raised Hindu. Meanwhile, I’ve got ghosts and skeletons gathering dust in the pockets of my coats. Sometimes, I feel them there when I reach for my keys or for my cigarettes.

We Catholics hold on to our dead for as long as we live, and we come willingly to their graves a few times a year to remember them. We bring flowers and candles and rosaries, we bring tents and lawn chairs and coolers full of beer.

They say to love someone long-term is to attend a thousand funerals for the people they used to be. In my mind, there is a graveyard with every version of A that he’s put on and discarded since I met him at the age of 16. Sometimes, I come here to bring a rose and contemplate all the ways I have loved him, but there is one gravestone that I have not yet stopped to visit.

The Tasmanian Devil

2012-- He was a snappy, restless 17 year old who always seemed like he had better things to do than worry about other peoples’ problems. There was always something new to learn, something interesting going on in his life, and that was a big part of his allure. I found that energy intoxicating.

We met a year before, at summer camp. Occasionally in the months after, I’d log on to Facebook and see the little icon next to his name glow with a message notification. I had never expected him to stay in touch, and that to me, was a big compliment in itself. The rest of my relationships from that summer faded into hi-hello’s and comments on each others Facebook photos.

He talked to me about life at boarding school, riding horses, and going to the beach with friends. He was quick-witted, mischievous, and incredibly smart. He had opinions about everything and could talk at length about politics and what was going on in the world, and then he would switch over to things like sex and relationships without missing a beat. I could tell he was looking to me for entertainment and I always felt nervous about not having anything funny to say. I was a Filipino, living in the Philippines; I couldn’t think of anything that my American pen-pal would find even remotely interesting or relatable.

To me, he seemed impossible to satisfy, twisting and turning and kicking up dust in a fit of boisterous humor and teenage rage. He was fascinating, and I wanted so badly to live life at that speed, to be just as unapologetic about my opinions and the way I saw the world.

At 16, I was slowly withdrawing into myself. I didn’t have a name for the early signs of depression, but I slowly cultivated the habits that would take me there. Outside of books or my favorite bands, I didn’t have many ideas that needed to be forcefully stated, and I was honestly just looking for someone who would listen to me try to form them. He seemed to have figured out how to bake his opinions overnight and run with them, and I was still just learning how to walk. I was clearly no match for this Tasmanian devil and still, I got swept up in his dance.

He flirted a lot and he was nonchalant about it. The boys I knew were shy and calculated, like so much was hanging in the balance in every interaction, but his strategy seemed to be more “fire and forget.” He flirted with me recklessly and called me his angel over Viber messages and Skype calls, with little to no consideration what it was doing to me.

Or maybe he did know. Maybe he knew exactly what he was doing. I thought about this a lot and it seemed the idea of full awareness and nonchalance just further intrigued me. What a privilege it must be not to care, but to be desired nonetheless. I cared so much and felt so irrelevant; I wanted to be like him, I wanted to not care about feelings, too. Feelings were all I was made of at 17 and it was exhausting. I wanted to have fun, be aloof, be chase-able, like the girls he desired and flirted with and talked about. What was that like?

When I look back now, everything is hazy.

A year and a half into our friendship, I realized I fell in love with him and like a fool, I decided to let him know. I didn’t realize that there was only one way that it could have gone, and I put my foot on the accelerator and drove the whole thing into a wall.

When he didn’t reciprocate my tenderness, I couldn’t bear my embarrassment. I was angry — how could he flirt with me like that and say he didn’t feel the same way? —,  I was indignant —what kind of girl did the think I was?— , and I was hurt. I felt strung along and played with by someone I opened up to and trusted.

He couldn’t believe I had fallen in love over the phone, but to me it seemed like the most natural thing that could happen. All that time, he had been teasing me and getting me to open up to him,  what did he expect? I ended up falling in love by myself, and I felt foolish and betrayed.

My response was to do a complete 180*, retreat back into my shell, and scuffle away in a huff. I told myself to stop wasting time on him and I deleted his number in my contact list. Whatever that was, we’re done.

He gave me space after that and we eventually lost touch— one more reason I convinced myself that I meant absolutely nothing to him. A year passed before we started talking again, and by then, it seemed like we were different people.

I thought if I put the right armor on, we could be friends again. I convinced myself that, because he had hurt me before, I would be safe this time. Inoculated, clear-eyed, as long as I remembered that none of it meant anything. I told myself that every bit of affection between us was just another joke, another part of the game he liked to play. 

So, I stood up straight and proceeded confidently. I offered him friendship, an ear to bend, a willing audience for his rambles and debauchery. In return, he never brought the past up again.

The Funeral

All those years, I didn’t want a conversation, I just wanted to move forward. I realize now that it might be why every few months, I break down over something that happened so far in the past.

Sometimes, I wonder if it’s too late for a funeral. Some days, I want to build a funeral pyre and throw some gas and a lighter over it. I want to watch all the bitterness burn away. Some days, I want to hold vigil and talk late into the night and drink until I can’t see straight.

Most days, I want to stop feeling like I have to tiptoe around the grave of the 17 year old boy that broke my heart, the 17 year old boy that a part of me still hates. I want to stop imagining all the booby-traps I could have avoided if I only knew better. I wonder if I would have had the guts to call him out if I did, or if I would have been impatient and just rolled my eyes, moved on, and never looked back.

Reincarnation

At 25, A hardly resembles the cocky 17 year old that he was all those years ago. He’s a full inch taller for one, and he’s grown into himself a little more. He even smiles differently now, more genuine and more relaxed. When we started dating, A came to visit me in the Philippines. His dad remarked that he hadn’t seen A smile like that in a while. I like to think that I make A happy, that maybe my presence in his life gave him back a bit of the simplicity he lost in his teen years.

We both changed quickly and drastically since we decided to give dating a real shot in 2016, three years after we rebooted our friendship. I took a while to come around, and I didn’t believe it right away when he told me he loved me. It went against everything I told myself, but still, like a sucker, I hopped on a plane to New York City to visit him and figure things out. I spent my senior year of college trying to convince my parents that I had an internet boyfriend and that he was real.

We’ve since graduated, found jobs, resigned from jobs, and learned to file taxes. We’ve met each others families, gone on road trips and beach trips, and attended Diwali parties and weddings together. I applied to grad school, got accepted, and, after a crazy 2 months, I moved stateside.

Even now, we are evolving, and each year looks different than the one before. We went from daily Facetime calls and long-distance Netflix dates and months without touching to spending every weekend together and making omelettes on Saturday mornings. We’ve become a bit of a legend in our friend circle after overcoming the distance in one piece. Soon, we’ll be moving in together and celebrating our 4th anniversary.

Most of the time, I’ve forgotten what it’s like to be 17 and it feels like a different lifetime. I am living a life better than anything I could have thought up at that age, and when I look at the life A and I are building together, it all feels far away.

Whatever happens in the past, usually stays in the past. But even after several reincarnations, the soul knows where it’s been.

[hawk-in-a-jazzy-hat]

Anime Review: Saga of Tanya the Evil

Tanya Degurechaff. She’s slight, frail-looking and frankly adorable, with pure white skin and piercing blue eyes. She is also the most powerful and most feared mage on the battlefield, serving the Empire’s forces with an iron fist and a heartless streak. One look and you wouldn’t believe she was just a little girl...

And you’d be right, for behind the innocent-looking face is the spirit of a salaryman, plucked from his world after his untimely death after insulting the self-proclaimed god, or Being X. Now, as Tanya, he has been put into a time and a place other than his own, where his deeply Darwinist views are put to the test. All Tanya wants is a quiet, peaceful life, but with war brewing around her, the Empire lauding her every move and, the enemy states out for her blood and Being X out for retribution, that’s going to be difficult...

Okay, so...I know what this sounds like. This sounds like the most tasteless, schlocky thing you can ever imagine and why on earth am I reviewing something like this, why would I do this to myself?

Well honestly, it’s kind of fascinating. I couldn’t quite get a handle on what Tanya the Evil was supposed to be, even deep into the series. Is it propaganda, or a Greek-style tragedy, or a cautionary tale, or just a military show with war is hell emblazoned over every scene. In a good episode, it could even be all of them. But I’m getting ahead of myself; let’s dive in.

The production is by a newbie studio this time, Studio NUT (yeah, I know, get your laughing out the way now). Honestly for a first time out, they do a pretty dang good job. It’s a bit more rough and scratchy than most shows nowadays, with an art style that looks nothing like the manga artwork put which fits quite nicely. The show budgets itself well with great expression work and well-integrated CG, allowing for some properly epic fight scenes, as well as some genuinely interesting talking-heads moments. The one main issue is with some of the character design; the men generally look alright, and all of them look unique, but the ladies tend to err on the side of melted-Barbie doll in some areas. Tanya gets better in this regard, probably due to her constantly pulling insanely fun expressions, but the real WHAT design comes from her second-in-command, Viktoriya Serebryakov, who I have seen affectionately referred to as Droopy the War Crime Enthusiast. I mean...look...

It’s not show-ruining, but it is occasionally a little hard to take some scenes seriously with that kind of cute fluffy mascot popping up every other scene. But then I’m not entirely sure I’m supposed to take this show seriously.

The music is pretty much what you’d expect for a show like this; great, booming Dies-Irae level choirs going ah-ah-ah and spouting faux-Latin over every action scene; it’s bloody glorious. While there’s no real standout tracks throughout the show the opening and ending more than make up for it; the opening is by Myth & Roid; a harsh, kinda synth-metal track that sounds so similar to the Black Lagoon opening that I can’t believe it’s not actually the same band. The ending is even better; a driving, aggressive tune sung by Tanya herself Aoi Yuki, all set over gorgeous stills from the manga.

So when the first episode of the show came out, I and many other people were rightly a little concerned given how utterly brutal and...honestly exploitative the show looked. People dying left, right and centre, Tanya being thrown up on a pedestal despite doing some very dodgy things; it looked ready to turn into some of the most tasteless Nazi-lauding propaganda ever. But when the second episode came round, that was quickly thrown out the window as we actually learnt the origins for Tanya and are given the main driving force. The show wasn’t trying to congratulate Tanya’s exploits, as seen when she was given a rival in Being X; a character who is portrayed in the remarkably creative way of speaking through other people’s mouths, both dead or alive, in scenes which are both fun to watch and extremely creepy.

Tanya is undergoing punishment for her actions in the previous life, and her fascist outlook. Being X’s only real action was to take that outlook and put it in an alternate world where it honestly fits right in, to try and show her how much her actions were hurting people. The problem is that Tanya doesn’t give a crap about other people and immediately gets round to taking advantage of her situation, not to try and gain glory or laud her views over anyone else (at least not overtly) but just to get to a comfortable position. She is, without question, the villain of the piece, but we get a good insight into her thought process and how her actions are harmful both to the world around her and honestly to her own life. While the show doesn’t ‘end’ as such, it stops at a turning point where the show could have been over, but isn’t, largely down to Tanya’s own paranoid actions. She’s egotistical, ruthless, has no qualms over mass murder or manipulation and frankly lives up to the show’s name. But she is still undeniably human.

So does that make Being X the good guy? Uh...not really. I hesitate to call him god, or the devil, partially for obvious reasons of my own faith, but also because he seems like somebody far out of his depth. Let’s be honest; if he was a true deity there would be no contest between him and Tanya, but instead of passing judgement he instead buys into her utter rejection of him and puts her in a situation where she has the advantage. He doesn’t want her to change her ways; he just wants her acknowledgement of him as a god. It’s honestly petty, and it soon becomes clear he’s panicking when he starts forming other pawns to try and take Tanya down, to little success. Although by the end of the series he too has progressed, as Tanya finally acknowledges him...and properly condemns him. From a story perspective, Being X has won. And given his victory, everything else that happens will fall upon Tanya. She’s risen, and has reached the turning point.

So the central point of the show is a nice little battle of wits between a self-serving person and an indifferent entity, forming a nice little Death-Note-esque undercurrent of paranoia and intrigue, which neither supports nor condemns either side. It’s certainly interesting, but it does leave the problem of having no relatable characters. Tanya’s squadron, Droopy included, do help this somewhat by being the most likeable characters by far; while none of them really develop with the exception of Grantz, they each have defined personalities and add a much needed human element to many scenes which would otherwise just be horrible to sit through. They also set up potential conflicts for the future; now that we know these guys, and we know where Tanya’s character is heading, they’re most likely going to be the ones who stand in her way the most.

The rest of the characters really don’t have much going for them, and that’s the big problem with the show; while the central intrigue and human element are all well and good, a large chunk of the show revolves around military operations, long talks in boardrooms, stuffy suits smoking cigars and trying to come up with tactics, and a lot of time devoted to seeing how this NOT!WW1 is going to develop, as the Empire and the Alliance Entente (pause while I stare into the camera) make their moves. If you’re into that kind of stuff, great. I’m not. It drags, it’s boring, and the constant scenes of trench warfare are borderline exploitative.

So is there anything else of note? Well honestly, the tech is pretty cool. Obviously this doesn’t take place in our world, with the use of magic, but magic here is more an enhancement tool than anything else, being used in tandem with machines to allow flight packs and magical explosions (EXPEROSHON!), amongst other things.

Also despite being, you know, a horrible show about horrible people doing horrible things, the show can actually be pretty damn funny at times. From nearly blowing up a submarine in your sleep to Tanya struggling to reach a map to Tanya using her ‘cute voice’ to demand a complete surrender, it shows that the show is far more self-aware and willing to poke fun at itself than even Death Note was. The humorous moments help break up some of the more dour scenes, and with the help of some snappy editing, it makes the show remarkably entertaining.

Then there’s the series ending, which I honestly feel is about the halfway point of the series. The main ‘war’ is over, but another one is about to begin that is going to change this world. Tanya has already reached her prime, having achieved her goal, but with that comes the realisation that nothing is going to change. Whatever happens in future, she is on the wrong side of history, unless she changes it herself. As the title says, this is a saga, showing the rise of one of the most notorious evils of this world. If they ever make a season 2, that will need to be her fall. I know exactly how the show should end, even down to who should be the one to end Tanya. Of course, the whole unfinished thing does put a damper on the fun slightly once you realise that, for all its playing around the subject, the show has never outright condemned Tanya’s actions. That...is a genuine problem, and if that is not followed up on, that has the potential to ruin the series. But we’ll see; with any luck there’ll be a second season to give us the ending we need.

The best way to watch Saga of Tanya the Evil is to remember one core thing; she’s evil. There’s no dancing around the subject, no moral complexity, and no holding back with the evil deeds. She’s evil. She’s a villain. And honestly, the show does a good job of portraying that while still giving her a few layers and not being exploitative with it...too much. Once you can get past the moral ickyness, the rest of the show is pretty dang good, with a strong central conflict, likeable supporting characters, a lot of fun action set-pieces and a wicked sense of humour. The constant exposition and war fetish stuff does both drag down the excitement and make the whole thing more than a little tasteless, to the point where I can completely understand any hate for the series. But honestly, I like it. It’s different, and for what it is, it’s harmless.

My score: 7/10

Next time; from not!history to more not!history, as I catch up with some wacky composers doing really weird things. Next review is Classicaloid.

[phidiaspickle]

For @trulyprincesspenelope

Taurus ARDOR LANGUOR DETERMINA TION PREJUDICE INDUSTRY INTRACTABILITY P A TIENCE GLUTTONY LOGIC COMPLACENCY SENSUALITY JEALOUSY

Dog CONSTANCY UNSOCIABILITY RESPECTABILITY SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS INTELLIGENCE TACTLESSNESS UNEASINESS CRITICISM DUTY CYNICISM HEROISM MORALITY

“I have” Earth, Venus, Fixed

“I worry” Positive Metal, Yin

Here is a dutiful combination gifted for performances of all kinds and cursed by a surfeit of uneasiness, which easily translates into dissatisfaction. Let me explain. Tanreans born in Dog years tend to complain a lot. They find fault with much of what life offers, As for what life doesn’t offer—they feel it should. Taurus/Dogs have an overdeveloped sense of injustice. They cannot understand why it seems as if the cards are always stacked against them. Why are others so lucky? Why do things seem to just fall into their laps? Why don’t wonderful lucky things happen to me? grumbles the dissatisfied Taurus/Dog.

Childlike appeal and apparent innocence of all that is tawdry and crooked make the Taurean Dog a lovable and dear companion. He’s interested in and capable of many different pursuits. He usually has a talent for amusing crowds and is willing and able to take on great responsibilities. Despite his inborn talent for determination and respectability, for industry and even heroism, the Taurus/Dog suffers from a painful lack of self-confidence. He is never, from childhood forward, quite sure of himself. Often, because of this insecurity, the Taurus/Dog settles for remaining in the wings of life for the whole or his childhood and adolescence. Then, by the time he is old enough to answer his cue and leap onto center stage, Taurus/Dog may not feel quite ready yet. He’ll hang back, find excuses for delaying his one-man show and, if he not careful to find the right partner who pushes and prods and loves and cares enough to shove the Taurus/Dog out there, the Taurus/Dog may find himself at retirement age standing hangdog in the same wings of life wondering whatever happened to his cue.

This person is a natural-born worry wart He’s also extremely perfection conscious and wants things to be done right and go well and come out flawless. If they don’t, he will be the first to blame not only himself but also to scold those who surround him. “Why don’t you take things more seriously?” wonders Taurus/Dog to his lighthearted friend or mate or child. “Why can’t you see how important this is?” he may chide.

When the Taurus/Dog does succeed in a big way, he may tend toward smugness. He feels he has worked harder than others to get where he is. He knows that some people might have cheated or tricked to get places in life. But not the Taurean Dog. Never! Taurean Dogs are the first to consider themselves “good” people who always do things “right.” Struggle and huff and puff and bark and growl and sweat. Then, when they do win fame or fortune or the approval of their entourage, Taurus/Dogs are capable of opining, “I deserve this. I work harder than anybody else. It’s about time somebody recognized my enormous talent.” You see, life really is not easy for Taurus/Dogs. Because of their own reticent attitude, they often are left out, overworked, and misunderstood. They are more conscientious than lots of other folks. And they are sensitive in the extreme. Couple this sensitivity with a native tendency to jealousy and possessiveness and you come up with a mighty testy character. You may see the Taurean Dog as inexcusably self-involved. But don’t think for one minute that lie perceives himself as anything less than Albert Schweitzer—caring, loving, giving, warmhearted, kind, indulgent. Taurus/Dogs do take up causes and care a lot about the little guy. They are liberal- hearted and willing to go far to help out the less fortunate. This person can persevere in what seems to be hopeless situations. His loving and caring capacity is very, very strong. Usually, these people are generous and willing literally to give you the shirt off their backs. They are sweet-natured underneath all that ill-tempered blather and dither. Taurus/Dogs are the kinds of dogs who growl a lot when they first meet you and who, before you know it, have jumped into your lap and are licking your face all over. They need encouragement and plenty of applause. 

Love 

The doubting Dog nature coupled with the plodding and stubborn yet possessively ardent Taurus personality provides us with a constant, faithful and sincerely devoted lover. No mountain is too high to climb, no river too wide to wade across for the sake of this person’s love object. In relationships, the Taurus/Dog always feels that he is the one who gives the most. And he likes it that way. What Taurean Dog people sometimes fail to take into consideration is that in order to be able to love them back with the identical fervor they throw into each affair, their partner must be possessed of abnormally superior powers of tickle. To be the full- time lover of a snappy and grave Taurus/Dog, you have to be a stand-up comic, a Saint-Bernard and a clown. The successful mate for Taurus/Dogs is able to find humor in all aspects of things. Otherwise, what with the natural Taurean Dog pessimism turned up full volume for life, the household ambience may amount to something akin to a cemetery’s. Bottom line: if you love a Taurus/Dog, always keep ‘em laughing. 

Compatibilities 

Love will blossom between you and Cancer, Virgo, Capricorn and Pisces/Cats, Horses and Tigers. Blends like the above suit your testy and essentially pessimistic nature. You need to be buoyed, optimized and occasionally booted in the rear end, too. But not by Leo, Scorpio or Aquarius/Tigers, Dragons or Goats. Their motives may not be wholly altruistic. Yours usually are. 

Home and Family 

The Taurus/Dog will not make a great fuss about his surroundings. He usually likes things efficient and warmly colored. But whether or not he has the latest in designer furnishings is of little consequence. Rather than fussing about the latest or the best in modern or antique design, the Taurus/Dog will want things personalized his way. He may move the furniture around in a hotel room or tack up magazine pictures on the walls of a rented vacation flat. He likes things to be quaint and cozy and comfortable. He eschews plastics. The Taurus/Dog’s family, even though it is often a source of immense disappointment to him from the beginning of his life, ranks high on his popularity meter. Where there is a need for devotion and duty and a call for duty and reliability, you can always count on the services of this loyal cohort. Where his children are concerned, he will be both careful and serious. He may be a tiny bit strict with kids, but it’s only because he wants them to be happier than he ever was and the Taurus/Dog firmly believes that self-restraint is one of the secrets of happiness. You watch. If a Taurus/Dog ever dares to indulge himself in any debauchery at all, the guilt and self-recrimination are shattering to witness. He wants to be thought of as above reproach. The Taurus/Dog child will strike you as rather solemn at first. He is not easy to know and requires lots of cheering up and jollying along. This child can he counted on to obey and to try to do things the way parents wish. If you have such a kid, look for his own personal passion very early on and force him to overcome shyness and trepidation, so that later on he will have fewer chances to moan about what he missed. Get him out of the shadows at a young age. 

Profession 

There is little the Taurus/Dog cannot accomplish, He is usually both talented and willing to work. He may prove slower to achieve than others, but the fine results will always be worth the extra time he spends. Dogs born in Taurus will be both reliable and concerned about the impression made on colleagues and clients. As he may be a touch awkward socially, the Taurean Dog must be careful to surround himself with outgoing and gregarious colleagues. Taurus/Dogs are good at detail, and although not exactly influenceable, they are definitely open to new ideas and always ready to try out more modern methods. As an employee, the Taurus/Dog will be loyal and forthright. From time to time he may prove a shade argumentative over niggling little points. But on the whole Taurean Dogs take care to see a job well done. As bosses, Taurus/Dogs enjoy a good reputation among their workers. The Taurean Dog, remember, is a fair person and, even if a tiny bit grouchy sometimes, is overall a kindly sort who doesn’t mind sharing the less pleasant tasks with his colleagues. If cheated or tricked in business deals, the Taurus/Dog may grow bitter. He doesn’t take kindly to con jobs. So, if you were thinking of trying to hoodwink a Taurus/Dog, remember that his bite is almost as harsh as his bark, I can see Taurean Dogs in all sorts of jobs. They might be physicists or city planners or own and operate a newspaper store or bookstore. Show business and politics alike present the Taurus/Dog with opportunities to use his talents well. He’ll be very fulfilled as a teacher or in any rural job requiring attention to ecological concerns. 

Some famous Taurus/Dogs: Lenin, Golda Meir, Shirley MacLaine, Andre Agassi, Arletty, Carl XVI (King of Sweden), Cher, Georges Moustaki, Master P. Michel Poniatowski, Scott Bairstow, Serge Reggiani, Socrates, Uma Thurman, Yannis Xenakis.

[rebeccaheyman]

reading + listening 9.7.20

It’s been a minute since my last bona fide review roundup, in part because our week of vacation was followed by a week of long-overdue family visits (after all parties clocked negative covid tests), and in part because I hit a reading slump. Or rather, my version of a slump: a couple DNF aBooks in a row, plus an imbalance of reading and listening. I’ve pulled myself out of the lull, but the list below reflects my relative floundering for the past two weeks. Le sigh.

You Have a Match (Emma Lord), eBook, ARC (pub date Jan 2021). NetGalley review:

I absolutely loved TWEET CUTE and was eager to see how Lord would follow-up such a sparkling debut. YOU HAVE A MATCH brings the same timely, fresh, emotionally immediate storytelling as TC, albeit with slightly less humor and slightly more pathos. The concept takes a little more oomph to get off the ground (Leo's ambiguous ancestry leads to the DNA test that yields a secret sister result for protagonist Abby, and all relevant parties end up at the same summer camp together), and at times the narrative posturing becomes quite literally acrobatic (climbing trees, falling in ditches). Still, I happily suspend my disbelief for the sake of Lord's smart, authentic-feeling characters. In what might be a hallmark of her work, there's a consistent social media presence (IG, as opposed to TC's reliance on Twitter and an in-world messaging app). My dearest wish is that Lord's future work will not consistently rely on these trappings, which will sadly not age well; her storytelling chops are more timeless than the contemporary technologies featured in these narratives.

Muse (Brittany Cavallaro), eBook, ARC (pub date Feb 2021). NetGalley review:

I want to start by noting my excitement for this book -- and really, anything Brittany Cavallaro writes. I loved the Charlotte Holmes series and was eager to explore this new direction for Cavallaro's work. But for me, MUSE felt like it was always starting -- the action always rising, world always building, characters always establishing their identities. I didn't feel especially close to Claire, whose powers are somewhat ambiguous until they crystallize, very momentarily, in Act III. Part of the trouble, for me, is the intensive brain exercise required at the book's outset, to both visualize and conceptualize this version of America--a monarchy ruled by generations of King Washingtons. Ultimately, the story's setting (St. Cloud, along the Mississippi River) could be any imagined place; that this is a re-envisioned version of 1890s America has nothing to do with the political intrigues that drive the plot forward. I longed to spend less energy on parsing the intersections of real and imagined Americanism, and more time exploring Claire's power, her relationships to Beatrix and Remy, and the political machinations and intrigues in St. Cloud.

If my reading of MUSE is correct, then the second installment in the duology should be a runaway train of action, smart plotting, and feminist agendas -- in short, a book I very much look forward to reading. What I appreciated most in this first half of the story is what I've come to expect from Cavallaro generally: snappy, smart prose and strong women helming the narrative. It wasn't enough to make me love this read, but it's absolutely enough to keep me invested in the story's (eventual) conclusion.

The Ten Thousand Doors of January (Alix Harrow), aBook. May I confess that while this book came highly recommended from an extremely trusted reader-friend, I DNF’d my first attempt with the eBook back in November 2019? I couldn’t tell you what about me + this book didn’t jive last year, but a title this decorated and adored isn’t one I’ll easily give up on. I circled back around to it with the aBook (brilliantly narrated by January LaVoy), and while I can’t say this will rank among my favorites in the genre, it’s a solidly inventive, beautifully written narrative. In theme and structure, it’s awfully close to THE STARLESS SEA, which for me was a better book overall (one of the best of the year, actually). Something about the way the eponymous January too frequently claims “if I had only known what would happen next, I wouldn’t have done x” turned me off; this character seems to have a habit of being so caught up in her emotions that she doesn’t see obviously awful things about to happen. The antagonistic forces felt overdone and a little silly at times, and the mastermind reveal is too obvious by half. For all the flaws in TEN THOUSAND DOORS, the writing is solid enough that I’m absolutely planning to read Harrow’s next, The Once and Future Witches, out next month. 

The Marriage Clock (Zara Raheem), aBook. THE MARRIAGE CLOCK appealed to me in part because its narrator, Ariana Delawari, is a joy (she was absolutely brilliant on THE WRATH AND THE DAWN duology), and in part because I’m a sucker for Desi-focused narratives; I just love reading about these big, close-knit families with a strong focus on culture and family devotion -- not to mention the food and fashion. Suffice it to say, I was predisposed to enjoy THE MARRIAGE CLOCK... and it was... just okay. The book tries to build a story of self-actualization on a foundation of anecdotal montage -- essentially, the first two thirds of the book are about bearing witness to a series of bad first dates and getting commentary on the sorry state of modern romance. The story definitely improves once Leila goes overseas to attend a wedding, but I confess by then I felt obligated to finish simply based on time invested. The book’s conclusion, which I won’t spoil here, would have felt more satisfactory if Leila’s behavior and attitudes hadn’t been so childish throughout. Bottom line: If you can watch early seasons of Sex In The City without wanting to shove Carrie Bradshaw into oncoming traffic, you’ll probably really like THE MARRIAGE CLOCK. But if you’re looking for a more mature, nuanced Desi romance with lots of heart, consider my personal fav, THE BOLLYWOOD AFFAIR (Sonali Dev).

Smooth Talking Stranger (Lisa Kleypas), aBook. This was my first contemporary romance from Lisa Kleypas, which came highly recommended by another trusted reader-friend. The opening salvo didn’t draw me in as quickly as some of Kleypas’s historical romances, but I stuck with it because of the personal rec and Brittany Pressley’s easy-to-listen-to narration. The story is enjoyable enough, despite an underlying “mystery” that lacks real intrigue. All in all, it seems like fairly average contemporary romance... right up until the emotional gut-punch leaves you wrecked at the end of Act III. I couldn’t tell you why -- because again, nothing super special about our MCs or the plot -- but this novel had me crying all kinds of tears by the end. A strange, and strangely satisfying listen, but not necessarily one I’d recommend.

Just Like Heaven (Julia Quinn), aBook. I’ve been meaning to read a Julia Quinn for awhile; she’s a prolific heavy-hitter in the genre, and frankly it feels negligent not to have read her yet. I’ve hesitated, in part, because of purportedly questionable content in one of Quinn’s early titles, THE DUKE AND I. Reading reviews of that novel red-flagged Quinn’s entire catalogue for me (yes, it’s that bad). After reading plenty of reviews for JUST LIKE HEAVEN, I was pretty certain the egregious violations THE DUKE AND I weren’t being repeated, and the allure of Rosalyn Landor’s narration confirmed my choice. Long and short verdict: Meh. While I found our hero and heroine passably tolerable, there’s not much plot here. Instead, there’s an almost obsessive focus on one character’s recovery from an infection (gross), and when that chicken stops laying eggs, we’re asked to care about a quasi-farcical string quartet our other MC is forced to play in. The secondary characters introduced as potential leads for the rest of the quartet were either too stupid or too annoying for me to care about. If you’re hankering for historical romance, pass this over and just reread Tessa Dare for the millionth time (when will I start taking my own advice?).

Fable (hard cover) + Namesake (eBook ARC, pub date March 2021). Instagram mini-review of FABLE here. NetGalley review of NAMESAKE here. Adrienne Young is brilliant, full stop. I loved her previous duology -- SKY IN THE DEEP and THE GIRL THE SEA GAVE BACK -- and the Fable cycle does not disappoint. Strong, subtle characterizations; rich settings and evocative description; just enough mystical magic to make the world sparkle, but not enough to undermine the essential humanity of the story’s heart; and love of every stripe -- familial, romantic, friend, self -- driving the plot forward... could you even really ask for more? I devoured both halves of this gorgeous whole in a single weekend and I know you’ll love them both. Buy Fable ASAP and pre-order Namesake so Adrienne Young knows we know we don’t deserve her.

That’s it for me! On my radar this week:

Luster (Raven Leilani), aBook

The Lady’s Guide to Celestial Mechanics (Olivia Waite), aBook

Lady Derring Takes a Lover (Julie Anne Long), aBook

The Smash-Up (Ali Benjamin), eBook ARC

The Heiress (Molly Greeley), eBook ARC

We Can Only Save Ourselves (Alison Wisdom), eBook ARC

Plus, the continuing saga, Will I ever finish WHEN WE WERE MAGIC? Stay tuned, and happy reading!