#i just Cant read more than 100 words in an hour some months. i just keep rereading and reading extremely slowly and forgetting what i read

[rigelmejo]

hey my guy, didnt mean to talk shit about lack of brevity - it was meant as a like semi affectionate ask for line breaks.

I want to read your post! It is not too long!! But my brain is Dying. dyslexia is turning everything to mush the second i get five lines into your para.

(semi affectionate bc you are a stranger to me but i do vibe with your language learning goals? parasocial blablabla?? hopefulyl you feel me)

I feel you. <3 I will try to break those huge paragraph chunks a bit more, I'll think a bit. Part of it is that I try to write some posts as numbered lists where a numbered item has to be 1 paragraph even if it gets long. Then it DOES get long since I only have 1 paragraph to do it, then it gets so long I turn it into Regular Text instead of Numbered List format. Then it's just huge paragraphs from when I was trying to squeeze it into a numbered list format.

Maybe an alternative could be sections with headers or capital letter titles or in bold, to separate things. Instead of numbered lists. Then it would be easier for me to split sections into multiple parapraphs possibly. Again I will think on it. Apologies in advance though for the blocks of text I'll inevitably post at times. I just kinda end up writing long rambling a lot when I'm trying to jot down ideas (as seen by my horrifically long tags and main blog fandom bullshit lol sjdjjd)

Tldr: I'll try maybe more header titles bolded or capitalized or on their own line, to break up sections. Then maybe I'll be able to add more paragraphs without it being hard to locate which section is which. While having maybe a bit more line breaks hopefully.

[hiemaldesirae]

i have less than 24 hours left before i have to go through one of the most stressful days of my life so. heres a list of my fav radiostatic fic recs in no particular order

clarification: by radiostatic i mean fics where vox is 100% not the dom in the relationship. most of these dont contain explicit sex though, and im not recommending any straight porn fics here because you can easily find those with a click and search through the bottom vox tag lmao

most of these fics are unfinished, so be warned that i will not take accountability if you get attached to these without them being finished properly. in fact ill just laugh at you because then we'll be suffering together

now, that aside- starting off strong with some of the more popular fics:

RHTVS / Radio Healed the Video Star by Aspiring_Forest_Witch

notes: LONG fucking fic. like this guys almost 700k words long fic. one of the best things ive ever read in my life though and it has a plotline thats frankly more engaging than the actual showing of hazbin on amazon. so. you know. if you have the time to read it Please do you wont regret it

Unraveling Emotions by Xaelei

notes: one of my favourite fics ever on god. started my brainrot for dad!husk, portrays one of the most scrumptious radiostatic dynamics and is generally so very well written that i might end up trying to recreate one of the scenes in comic form. genuinely in love with this fic and im so glad i can say i was the first comment on this fic because my God its such a treat to see new chapters drop for this. unfortunately i havent had the time to write out a detailed comment as of now but if someone wants to let the author know that im still in love with their fic and will continue supporting it until i drop dead go ahead for me

Safe with Me by rillyrillo

notes: the prequel and main fic of this series is human radiostatic, though the sequel is set in hell. it comes with gorgeous gorgeous art and frankly one of the most exhilirating endings ive ever had the pleasure of witnessing play out. i recommend you guys check out their other fics too, the art continues in them + their radiostatic is written wonderfully across all universes!

A Month of Rut by Vylad

notes: this fic is very self indulgent to me. i love the way radiostatic is written in this one because theyre very soft and sweet, but others may not prefer it if theyre looking for freak4freak radiostatic. if you just want something to indulge in and relax with at the end of a heavy day though this is my #1 rec. i read this sometimes when i find myself crying at night lmao

Down, Up, and Back Down by CowboyEnthusiast

notes: made me sob like a baby. 10/10 no notes whatsoever read it for yourself because you WILL not regret it. i genuinely am always at a loss for words whenever i reread this because it is among the most gutwrenching but beautiful and poetic works that ive ever read and i think it deserves some recognition

Mind the Gap by ZLynn

notes: again, to reiterate, i do very much dislike the abusive!staticmoth portrayal i see in a lot of fics. but in this one... it's written so perfectly, i can definitely see it actually happening. i enjoy the way that val does still seem to care about vox, albeit in his own twisted way that eventually breaks and fractures their love and trust, and its just. Ugh. So fucking good

+ with the less popular but still wonderful depictions of radiostatic that i love to indulge in:

i'll give you a show (cause it helps fill the seats) by dead_and_dreaming

notes: absolutely shameless plug from me for my dear mk's work because i cant stop thinking about the way that she's portrayed al here. its actually insane how fucked up that stupid little deer is and i just. i really fucking love the way that their alastor is written, it's genuinely probably my Number One depiction of alastor ever. i demand more of this stupid little freak RIGHT NOW!!!!

Any of the fics by Rachello344 in the Hazbin Hotel Fandom Tag on their profile

notes: so remember when i told you guys i wouldnt be linking straight porn. looks away... okay in my defense though i read the smut for the characterization and their unique dynamics. its sooo interesting to see how their radiostatic is explored here and im honestly refreshed by the depiction of their relationship. im here for it !!!

The Read 'Em and Weep Series by TooManyPseudonyms

notes: so from what i was able to piece together (everything flies over my head when im reading, forgive me for my low media literacy) this is an au set before the hotel where (in the first work) al and vox are in a qpr relationship. in the second work this evolves into a romantic relationship, and the exploration of their dynamic through this is just... Yeah. please read it its 100% worth your time and so underrated it hurts my heart

Uneasy by Saezs

notes: this fic is one of the first radiostatic fics i read (the others being RHTVS and... i think i tried the 666 series, but it didnt appeal to me lol) and its actually just wonderful. i really love saezs's genderfluid vox and how supportive the other vees are of them <3 their portrayl of the characters puts a smile on my face whenever i reread their work

Heat Waves by HappyPRAWN

notes: i'll be fr dsmptsd hit me like a truck when i read the title but it is such an interesting debut! only at one chapter as of me making this post but the way the author wrote this is so engaging and it really makes me wonder what they have next in store for the fic

Do I have your attention now? by Chi_Chi25

notes: wow no way we have the same name... anyway ahem. ill be completely honest this ones a bit of a guilty pleasure for me. this fic is a bit fragmented and short, so for people who click off fics when they see imperfect grammar this one may not be for you. however if you can look past that, it has an engaging storyline and quite the juicy concept :)

Killer Ex by FanGirl48

notes: gorgeous, gorgeous little human! radiostatic oneshot. i love the relationship that vox and al have here... the reasons why they both stayed away from each other even though theyre still so very clearly down bad for each other... anyway. i think about this one a lot and i still go back to reread it sometimes lol

Negotiations by FanGirl48

notes: i didnt realize until i started making this list that this fic was also written by fangirl48.... go off queen keep feeding us (me). this one was a fic recommended to me initially by link nonny, and i can 100% vouch for how good it is. its got appletv interactions, radiostatic plus lucifer trying to navigate heaven, angels... basically everything needed for a very varied and well packed with flavour story

The diary of a Serial Killer by ShippersCave

notes: okay im running out of brain juice at this point but. yeah this fic is soooo self indulgent to me. this ones another human au, with al as a serial killer and vox as the journalist trying to conduct interviews with him. its got SUCH a good dynamic between al and vox, i encourage you guys to check it out and give it a chance even if youre not really into human aus.

My heart's been pierced by Cupid by ShippersCave

notes: pirate/siren au !!!!!!!!! RAAHH !!!!! i dont have to say anything else for this if thats not enough to get you to click then i dont know what is

System Shutdown by Swoolie

notes: i cant believe i nearly forgot about this one LMAO... vox goes onto a temporary hiatus and everyone goes crazy about it. im not really sure if this counts as radiostatic frankly because of the way its tagged but its so good i think you should give it a read anyway

Together in Radio Static by Anonymous

notes: QPR media husbands radiostatic au !!!! i love this one especially because it opens off with vox slapping alastor across the face for leaving him LMAOO (deserved)

What Has Been by Tianren

notes: another human au (YEAH YEAH I KNOW. JUST HEAR ME OUT OKAY i swear im cooking) look, as someone with religious trauma deeper than i can properly express and the worlds fifteenth worst parental issues, the depiction of vox in this fic just really hits home. i really adore the exploration of voxs past and how the themes of religious guilt and cults are woven in so far- and it blends very seamlessly with their human au, despite the characters eccentricities

you're too sweet for me by awestruck_atrophy and moonbeanies

notes: basically, vox and al make a deal where vox tries to help him out of the shackles or whatever that are bound to him because of his stupid dumbass lusting for power. its very intriguing so far and i love the setup and worldbuilding the authors have done, so you should check it out if you want a unique perspective on radiostatics relationship

candlelight by curtailed

notes: the best way i can think of to describe this one is like... fake marriage but instead of fake marriage its. fake roommates??? the author probably puts it better than me tbh. its super interesting so far, i cant wait to see where this one is headed especially with how unique its premise is!

Zero Day by Anonymous

notes: this one is like those time regression manhwas. you know, the ones where the protag goes back in time and proceeds to try and avoid everyone who made their life miserable- only to fail because for some reason now they're paying attention to them more than they would have had they stayed the same person. its certainly very promising, though! i do love indulging in time regression stories, especially when the mc is someone i love like vox. i really cant wait to see which direction this one is headed in :)

Never as Good as the First Time by IComeForFanficsNowin403

notes: okay. so, uh. um. so- this one is in spanish. HOWEVER its premise (serial killer alastor meets television star (?? i think. its not quite clear) at a party hosted by rosie, moves into his neighborhood to keep an eye on the pretty prey) is just so unique i honestly think its worth the experience to pull out google translate and try living the machine translated life. really. give it a chance. also its got beautiful art to go along with, so.. you know. thats just a bonus!

+ honorary staticmoth and one-sided/past radiostatic fic rec:

Freak-A-Zoid by Femalefonzie

notes: this fic deserves every single piece of praise its ever gotten because good lord. its SO good. i was not seeing the radiostatic twist come in, but it *is* mostly staticmoth. and also a/b/o but i mean. who *hasnt* indulged in a little bit of a/b/o before honestly

there are other fics that i personally like to indulge in, but i frankly wouldnt recommend to anyone else because they're either the kinds of fics that i myself can only bring myself to read after ive spent 8 hours at work crying into my pillow and need to look at something entertaining, or when im starved of content and cant be bothered to cook myself so i pull out the translator and start going at it. (technically i should know how to read french by now but. urgh. anywway..)

[mrghostrat]

Okay I cant -- I need to say it out loud.

I am 100% sure, at this point, you are my favourite artist so far. And I have to honestly thank you for a lot of stuff so let me get to the point before my anxiety takes me back --

I came across you less than a month ago. I don't remember if I saw your art before reading your fictions (Mon Horrible Cherì was my first) or the other way around, but both inspired me so much I can't describe it properly. Art itself is my absolute weak spot. In my past years I always struggled working on that, I was never happy with my results, and mostly had drawn to pay bills than for my own happyness. In the end I hated it at the point that every line I drew was a cut on my hand instead of a moment of joy. And that was horrendous.

But then I came across your art, at some point - and I was amazed. Your style is something I wished to achieve years ago, or very similar to that at least, so I was totally into looking for more, and more, and more. I can't produce art of that quality, but for the first time I wasn't envious of another artist's ability and talent, I was just... Amazed. I felt very happy, can't say why, but your style totally fascinated me. It still do. Anytime you post something new it gives me a shot of serotonine, it makes me feel happy and inspires me to get back on my Huion and draw something too. I started to push it through everyday, and in less than a month I grew a lot. You don't know that, but you pushed me into art with a passion I didn't had since I was 16, and I turned 30 couple months ago. Now it gives me joy everytime I draw. It doesn't matter if the art I produce is no good, or if I change my style everytime (I'm trying a lot of styles right now), the only thing that matter is the way I feel when I sit here and just let my inspiration go. And I feel happy. Happy to draw. Happy to experiment. Happy to share. Somehow I don't feel ashamed of my art anymore, and I was for a long time. I improved so much in these weeks. I watched carefully almost all of your timelapses (I am in love with all of them btw) and followed your tutorials more than once. Your examples, the way you work, is just inspirational for me. I've seen someone was thankful to you for the way you use references and says people out there to do it too: I want to thank you for that too. References was a taboo until last month for me, and I was SO wrong! Those helps so much!

So, well. I am not sure I wrote this all correctly, english is not my native language (I'm italian) and I may have done some mistakes, well, I do not care. I just hope I was able to express you my gratitude for all you did for me - I had to let you know how much this means to me everyday.

Oh also: I love every part of your art, but I could stare at your linearts for days and never get bored by that. And the way you color! Don't make me start on that. I could speak for hours. Not sure you'll want that, believe me.

So, thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Thank you for making me believe in myself again. Thank you for giving me back my passion. Thank you for reminding me everyday I can draw for myself, for my own happyness. And thank you for making me happy.

You are a great artist.

Thank you! <3

i put off replying to this because i wanted to draw you something, but i just haven't had the energy after work and dont want u to think im ignoring you 😭

but i dont have WORDS. i'm so fucking proud of you. i'm so happy for you. browsing your blog and seeing the sheer amount of art and AUs you're making is so inspiring. your happiness is contagious and i hope you only continue to grow, and continue to foster all that joy for art.

thank you <3

[astrangerthatcares]

i read your reasons to live post and the "your pets wont know where you went" really got to me because they really wouldnt and i dont ever want to leave them like that, but i dont know how to really live anymore. the apathy is sucking my joy out of everything and the sadness is always in the back of my mind. when i try to picture myself in the future, i cant imagine living past graduation, because i dont even want to. right now im writing this because im about 10 hours from being 100 days clean from s/h and the only thing preventing a relapse is my mental and physical exhaustion prevent me from bothering to do it. eating has started to upset me to make me feel guilty to the point where eating nauseates me, to where even my safe foods dont feel safe anymore. i dont know what to do anymore, i cant even remember the last time i was truly happy, not just an extreme mood swing or the kind of happiness where you can feel the sadness waiting in the back of your mind. why do i have to live, why do those reasons even matter, if they are just to keep me from dying rather than making me want to live? i dont even think the answer to that question really matters to me, i think all i really wanted is to know there was a real person out there who would listen to my problems and understand/care without the fear of burdening the few people who havent left me. im sorry if this ramble makes no sense i have a headache and dont care to proofread my ask otherwise ill feel like asking you is stupid and will delete this all and bottle it back up with the rest of my emotions. i probably sound like some stupid angsty teen but i cant bother to word this all better and eloquently when it doesnt really matter anyways

Anon, honestly, you sound like a mix of an old friend of mine and I.

It does matter, but I don't care if you write like Shakespeare or you are a disaster. I know it is hard to live. That's the whole point of it. I know I sound like a Mr. Wonderful mug, but in the end you can always find a way to be happy. It might be to read, to be with somebody, music or anything actually.

Now, these reasons are important, because I can't tell you how to be happy living, but if you die you really can't live happily. If you keep living you'll find happiness, trust me. Maybe not today, maybe not in a month, but you'll find it.

A lot of people stop liking to do stuff when they are depressed and don't want to live, but there is something the people I know that have gone through this like- music. I have a friend that learned every Alan Walker song. Another one played the violin. And the other just played rendom music. Try it. If you want to, through private messages you can tell me who you are. We can talk in a way that helps you more if I know more about you. No need to do it tho.

Please, be safe anon

-Stranger

[doctor-says-im-alright]

Ive been wondering lately if I really do have bipolar with psychotic features or if I have schizoaffective. Idk why the idea of bipolar though is so offensive to me lol. I think its because I never really feel grandiose and thats just an unfair part of the bargain.

The main difference I found is psychosis symptoms outside of mood episodes. Ive been trying to figure that out, but as my moods are really long, Im not sure. I was thinking maybe that is true because this year I seem to launch into paranoia in a single afternoon instead of over months. But thats associated with a stressed mood, not anything neutral? Idk. My paranoia is generally after Ive become fully stressed, but honestly, it is possible I have delusions constantly. How do you even know? I know I have OCD but I am so fixated on death that it might be more delusional than just OCD - like I do have rituals but its mainly just stressful thoughts that Im being haunted and the proof was a dead bug.

But the past week I noticed I shifted into a different phase. Im suddenly energetic or agitated. Like laughing hysterically, talking a lot, becoming really upset or angry, sad, overwhelmed, and constantly unreasonably scared. Everything is a threat. I seem to be really focused on fires happening for some reason. I am sleeping way more than normal, actually my sleep is suddenly really stressful. I dont go to sleep unless I take meds but thats normal for me, but now I cant get up. Ill wake up and its like Im magnetised to the bed and am stuck for awhile until I actually wake up. I sleep 12-14 hours but when I look at my Fitbit data its somehow only 5-6 hours in that time Im asleep. I know it, too. Its like Im not asleep and am in my room but dreaming in it. I didnt even realize I was so upset about this until I saw a post by someone talking about training their service dog to wake them up properly and asking how to do it and I could cry with the relief if I could figure out something mine could do to help me with it.

I generally always get told Im too self aware to have any psychosis issues and I think Im good at sounding self aware but Im actually not at all. I have no idea what Im thinking or feeling, Im guessing based on any knee jerk things that may have come out. Like last year I was in the psych ward for paranoia, but I hadnt even noticed or was able to communicate, but can see it now, that I was actually in danger of attacking people because I believed they were going to kill me first, and that had been my motivation to go in. And it wasnt even the person I said I was paranoid of.

I cant even figure out if my hand hurts or not. I have no idea what Im thinking or feeling. I know Im jumpy and on level 100 of agitation. I just suddenly start crying, Im overwhelmed with proofs of life and death. If someone tells me a joke I literally cry laughing. My words are mixing up and I feel like I cant say anything. I read things Ive written and even Im like what?? What does that even say. I know I am having PTSD symptoms - thats a given with me. I know for months Ive been hyperfocused on it, its been a source of anger outbursts.

Like for some reason the thought of romance or sex or any relationship sends me into a flying rage. My dog licking my other dog disturbs me so deeply I immediately lose it and have to run outside or throw something. People talking about love and needing people makes me feel so revolted. Ive been half dating someone and they mentioned kissing and Im ready to set myself and everyone else on fire. I cant stand the thought of desire and needing someone and craving them it is disturbing and I want to be sick thinking about it. But Im not normally like this at all. Not at all.

I am asexual and aromantic and my friend keeps making sex jokes and referencing my being asexual and I swear to god Im going to throw up on him or hit him with a wooden spoon. Havent decided yet.

[raggaraddy]

Sugar Daddy turned sour

Request: Hi!!!! read all of ur works its all amazing cant believe ur new.. can i request for a yan sugar daddy taehyung x reader x yan sugar daddy jungkook. they found out that that y/n have 2 sugar daddies and they lost their sanity(as if they even have that)...Thank u and YOU GOOD,KEEP GOING💜💞💞💞💞😘😁

A/N: I don't know how to post a reply to a personal message yet because I am new and Tumblr deficient 😅 But I hope you like the scenario ^-^ thanks for the request 💜

Here for Part 2

Summary: Juggling two guys and getting everything you want from them has always been easy for you, and Taehyung and Jungkook are no exception. Or so you thought.

Trigger warnings: Mentions of non-con, assault, cheating, violence.

Yandere! Taehyung

Yandere! Jungkook

Sunday.  Taehyungs day.  

You open your webcam, checking your eyeliner quickly in the startup view as you wait for the Tae to pick up on the other side. He pops up quickly a beaming smile filling his face.  

“Y/n! Baby, I’ve missed you.” He’s radiant. As happy and as bubbly he always is. 

You go along listening to him excitedly run through his past few days, telling you everything in excruciating detail as he jumps from one half-finished thought to another. He may be an adult but he certainly has a young soul. The whole while you feign attention, your fingers continually fidgeting with the diamond necklace or the matching bracelet he had sent you a few weeks back.

“How was your weekend?”  He finally gets around to asking. 

“Not so good. I always have to work so much," You complain, batting your eyes at the camera.  

“You could always quit and come live with me.” He jokes-but not really. It’s a topic he has raised 3 times already.  And you have the same answer ready as always. 

“Daddy, you know I’m a strong and independent woman. I could never let someone else pay for me.” You pout, running your tongue over your lower lip while pushing your chest up a little to draw attention.  “It’s just my rent is so expensive. I feel like I work just to pay the bills.” 

In truth, your rent is already being covered by someone else.  But he doesn’t need to know that. 

While you continue to run through the fabricated details of your weekend, Taehyung is distracted, looking down at his phone.  You know what's happening. It’s like a game. And you’re winning. Your banking app sends a notification, letting you know that K. Taehyung has just sent you a payment. 

You open it up. Yep. That's rent for the month.  Or more, money for that new TV you wanted.  

“Oh! Daddy, noo.” You whine down the camera. “You can’t.  I am okay. Really. Please don’t spend your money on me.” You frown if only to stop the smile that is fighting to fill your face. 

“I want to baby. I have the money, and I just want you to be happy. Don’t stress about bills okay. I’m here.” 

Sometimes, it’s almost too easy.  

“Okay Daddy, if you insist.”

Tuesday.  Jungkooks day.  

With Jungkook it’s a much more straightforward transaction.  He has said he wants to pay for you and he hates the back and forth pretences.  He just wants you to say thank you, smile pretty, and give him all your attention.  

“Do you need anything more for the week?” He asks through the camera.

“No Daddy, you take such good care of me. Thank you.” You smile. 

“You still have the weekend of the 14th off?” He raises his eyebrows suggestively.  Off-screen you quickly scan through your calendar.  

14th, 15th and 16th: Jk weekend.  

Hmm, that came up quicker than you expected. You try to keep your booty calls with them as far apart as possible. 

“Of course, I’m so excited! I haven’t seen you in weeks.” You say, it been less than 100% truthful.

“Months.” He corrects with a surreptitious undertone.  

“Where are we staying this time?” 

You always insist to stay in hotels. Because ‘your apartment feels too busy and mundane, and you want the time you spend with him to be magical and undistracted’. Honestly, you just don’t want him, either of them, in your personal space. You purposefully chose boys who live a few hours away.  It’s hard enough to keep them separated in your everyday life with them being far away. It could only get messy for them to know where you live and how to reach you in person.

You’ve certainly gotten smart at this. Arranging the two men into different days of the week, scheduling them into your calendar to keep them apart and unaware of the other. Both had specifically said very early on that they do not want to share you with anyone else.  And that you were all theirs. And while both of them seemed to trust you, you knew their reactions would be unpleasant, to say the least, if they found out about the other. 

Sugar Daddies can be so possessive. 

But while both these men are very handsome, money is better and more reliable than boys. And if they are stupid enough to spend it all on you, why should you care.

The week passes quickly and it’s the 14th.  Once more you find yourself in the lobby of a 5-star hotel. Jungkook arrived in town early and sent you a message with the room number. 

Time to actually work for your money. 

You knock on the door only to find it slightly open.  Entering there is a trail of rose petals lining the floor leading into the suite. All the lights are dimmed with a warmth of candlelight filling the room. This is so typically Jungkook. Pulling out all the stops to try to impress. 

Dropping your bag at the entrance, you close the door behind you and explore inwards.  

“Daddy?” You call out in a singsong voice. Your heels clack on the tiled floor as you round the corner into the living room. Jungkook is sitting on the lounge, one leg crossed over the other, arms rested up over the back. You smile at seeing him. You always seem to forget just how stunning he is in person. 

“Which one of us are you referring to?” A deep voice startles you from behind. You jolt, spinning to see Taehyung standing behind you leaning against the wall.  

Holy fuck. 

Your mind starts to jumble through what is happening. Thinking about what it was that might have given you away. Evaluating how much they may know. And planning your next move.  

Damn it.  You doubt you’ll be able to smooth talk your way out of this with Jungkook. He’s too direct and absolute. So you’ll just have to accept that that relationship is over. However, you might be able to salvage this situation with Taehyung if you play your cards right. Being defensive should do the trick.

“What is this?” You snap, keeping focused on Taehyung. “This is such a violation of my privacy! You keep smothering me Taehyung! See this is why I tried to find someone else to hang out with.” You stomp your foot. He would always wrap around your finger so quickly with the little girl act. 

“Ha!” He blurts out a short laugh in contradiction to how you expected him to react. “Wow. No, go on. I want to see where this is going.” 

“Do you think we only just found out about each other?” Jungkook pipes up, coming from the couch. 

You sigh. You had almost saved enough for a holiday to the Maldives too. But they seem to know too much. Fine. You can burn both relationships. They were starting to get too clingy anyway.  “Whatever.” You roll your eyes. You got all you could from them. Time to move on to the next.

As you shrug them off, Taehyung steps into the path of the front door. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” Both he and Jungkook start to close in tighter. There is a cold tone to his words. Something far too close to a threat for your comfort. Even in heels, both men naturally stand taller than you which usually wouldn’t bother you. But with an unsteadiness to your footing and a very short dress on, in a dark room with two men you have used and spurned, you are feeling even more vulnerable than you feel you should. 

“Move.” You order. 

A smirk on his lips, Taehyung lifts his hand up and backhands you, knocking you back a few stumbled steps. You gasp, your hand clinging to your cheek, eyes wide in shock. He starts forward, Jungkook intervening, standing between the two of you. 

You can not believe he just hit you! He has never done anything like that before.

“No, don’t do that.” He stops Taehyung as he starts to swing again.  Shaking all over, you’re relieved that one of them is seeing sense.  You take the outstretched hand of Jungkook, lip trembling from the burn on your cheek. He draws you closer and you wrap into him for protection. In the same motion, his free hand swings down punching you in the stomach, doubling you over, dropping you to the floor. “If you hit her head, she might get spaced out. I want her to feel this.”

His words send a chill down your spine. This can not be happening.

“Are you crazy!” You gape, trying to speak while gulping down air. Your head is dizzy, your lungs burning.  Kicking off your heels for better movement, you climb back up to your feet not wanting to engage either man. Eyes focused you look past Taehyung to the door, storming forward. “I’m leaving. We’ll forget all of this, okay.” You bargain through short, panicked breath. 

Taehyungs large hand slams you into the wall, pressing his palm against your shoulder. He follows Jungkooks lead, pounding his fist into your gut. And then again. And again.  His hold removes letting you free and you plummet to the ground, crying within broken huffs while cradling your battered torso. 

“You’re right. That is better.” He laughs at Jungkook. 

“Stop!” You beg, unable to raise your voice above a soft yelp. 

“What's wrong baby? You wanted two men. Now you have them.” Taehyungs bright smile returns to his face. This time with an entirely different meaning than it had ever had until it shifts into a straight, harsh look that you have never seen from him. “Didn't you always say you wished there was some way you could repay me?” 

“You said that to me too.” Jungkook joins his side, both hovering above you, trapping you between them, the wall, and the floor. 

Leaning down Jungkooks hand follows you as you squirm away from him. His fingers wrapped around your throat and lift you up, keeping you against the wall. He takes advantage of you being stuck, leaning into you pressing his lips to yours as you resist as much as you can. 

“Baby, you’re going to pay us back for every dollar we spent on you.” He snarls. 

Taehyung turns your face to him, also forcing a kiss on you. “Don’t worry, Y/n, you’ll see that we know how to share.”  

Part 2

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 318: On Your Left

Previously on BnHA: The Hawksquad+Lurkers were all “well this sucks” and sat around a bit talking about how maybe they should actually come up with a new plan that is actually good, but then in the end they were like “nah.” Deku was all, “THERE’S SOMETHING INSIDE ME THAT PULLS BENEATH THE SURFACE!! CONSUMING, CONFUSING!! THIS LACK OF SELF CONTROL I FEAR IS NEVERENDING. IT’S HAUNTING HOW I CANT SEEM TO FIND MYSELF AGAIN. MY WALLS ARE CLOSING IN.” Just, literally that whole entire song. All Might was all “Deku you should take care of yourself, try eating a thing,” and Deku was all “BYE, ALL MIGHT,” and just LEFT. He left!!! What the fuck!!!

Today on BnHA: Endeavor is all, “maybe if Deku didn’t listen to All Might he’ll listen to me instead.” Deku is all, “[doesn’t listen to Endeavor]” because, well, yeah. The Vestiges are all, “surprisingly, even we are a little concerned -- maybe you should get some rest, kid.” Deku is all, “((Ò ‸ Ó)).” The Vestiges are all, “holy shit.” Deku is all, “[wanders the ruined city streets terrifying the populace on account of him looking like Shelob had a baby with one of the Nazgul].” Some shriveled-up puppeteer villain asshole is all, “HORIKOSHI SAID IT’S MY TURN TO ATTACK DEKU TODAY SO I AM GOING TO SUMMON MY FRIGHTENED HELPLESS ATTACK MOB!!” Kacchan is all “WHADDYA MEAN THEY FOUND THE NERD!!! -- oh wait, that’s me, I found him. I found the nerd, you guys.” And just in time, too. I was about to owe a whole lot of people a whole lot of dollars.

so I have been super good about spoilers this week as always, but let me tell you guys, for the past 36 hours my dash filters have basically been nonstop “manga spoilers” this and “bnha 318” that, and so I’m coming in with a fair amount of hype here. your move, Horikoshi

oh, good! they got Endeavor to call Deku to try to talk him out of it. what a great and wonderful plan

“listen up kid, you haven’t slept since March and you are basically a walking biohazard right now, I’m just telling it like it is. didn’t you get shot like three times?? and there was a whole thing about how you urgently needed medical attention?? and supposedly we gave it to you, but I mean you haven’t even changed your clothes and don’t seem to have any fresh bandages or anything, so did we?? did we, really?? and also we all got blown up yesterday, so yeah.” hmm he’s making some reasonable points here you guys, but you sure do go on and on, Endeavor

oh he says foreign aid is finally on its way! I’m sure they’ll be very helpful. I mean in fairness they can hardly be worse than the home-grown heroes at this point

hey Enji, could you maybe try appealing to Deku the sixteen-year-old human boy, as opposed to Deku The World’s Last Hope? he does have value beyond his quirk. I know that’s always been an incredibly difficult concept for you to grasp, but could you maybe TRY, jesus

and also we’re worried about you as a person?? you’re just a kid and you’re pushing yourself way too hard?? you were going to say that part next, right. why the hell didn’t Hawks make this call instead

“don’t worry about me... I’m completely fine” Deku you do understand that saying it over and over again doesn’t actually make it true

and again with the rush!! all the rush rush rush!! we’re running out of time, we can’t let AFO and Tomura keep getting stronger, I have to end this now, there’s no time to rest, etc. etc. etc. just the constant pressure of this whole big countdown on top of everything else

holy shit, you KNOW it’s bad when even the Vestiges are telling him to chill

these guys are basically the walking talking embodiments of self-sacrifice; if even they’re telling him he needs to take five, then he must seriously be like half a step away from death’s door

OH SHIT LMAO

DIDN’T EVEN LET HIM FINISH HIS SENTENCE BEFORE HE SENT HIM INTO THE FUCKING SHADOW REALM WITH THAT FUCKING LOOK. HOLY FUCK. DIDN’T EVEN KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO DIE TWICE. SHIT

(ETA: so I’m pretty sure this was just Danger Sense activating and so he cut them off to go do more hero stuff, but I’m gonna go ahead and stick to my original interpretation anyway lol.)

anyway so how’s everybody doing. we all good? En, you good? Banjou? Shino? I’m imagining you guys all curled up in a little ball on the floor right now lol. can’t say I blame you though, no shame

lmaoooooooooooo

“SHEESH.” sheesh indeed, lmao. “what in the FUCK was that”

see, this is why y’all need Kacchan. you need someone who’s not going to back down from him no matter what. if it’s a matter of out-stubborning Midoriya fucking Izuku, then there’s only one other person on the planet capable of that, and we all know it. don’t pretend like you don’t. I am not going to shut up about this! we’ve had our hurt so now what about SOME COMFORT, DAMMIT

“I’m afraid that he’s becoming influenced by my conscience” nah are you kidding Nana this is all 100% made-in-Japan pure original Deku right here

see, Banjou gets it. “that kid, he’s totally going on his own.” exactly. this was so inevitable it was basically scientific law

“well I for one don’t see the problem with Deku being so obsessed with saving everyone else that he pushes himself until his body and soul literally fall apart” okay, whose speech bubbles are these?? we’re about to have words

lol of course

well you always did prefer the direct route didn’t you. but even you can’t possibly think this is okay lol

dark AU!Kacchan please tell us more about your badass doomed timeline in which everything went to shit and you apparently had the same character arc that Deku is having right now except it somehow made you sexier instead of turning you into a rabid t-rex. I have so many questions

oh so now you want to help??? well -- good, actually. sorry if that sounded offended just now lol

(ETA: so at first when I got to the end of this chapter I was wondering if Katsuki B. had somehow summoned his alternate-universe counterpart through trippy OFA space telepathy lol. but in the original Japanese there’s no reference to “we”, so this appears to be a mistranslation. this line should probably read more like “if there’s something/someone out there that would be able to complement/complete the current Midoriya Izuku [it would be]…” which, oh hello, is that Horikoshi once again reaffirming that Deku and Bakugou complete each other lol. “guess what guys, the Vestiges ship it too" heck yeah. they know what’s up!)

look how admiring his boyfriends are. HORIKOSHI GIVE US THE REST OF THIS BACKSTORY ALREADY GODDAMMIT

“meanwhile somewhere in the depths of the ruined city, Deku was having a dance-off with the villains”

I like how the villains all have this “AHH WHAT THE FUCK” kind of body language to them lol. I mean if it were me, and an eldritch horror suddenly clawed its way from the shadows with its writhing glowy tentacles and pants-shitting nuclear death stare, I would probably just die on the spot. no need to stick around. only pain awaits

lol for a minute I thought this was Can’t Ya See-kun and I was like “WHAT A FASCINATING CROSSING OF PATHS” but it’s just some random girl

he seems genuinely confused lol

Deku it’s because you look like something that crawled out of a sewer drain, sweetheart

lol they just took his word for it?

so trusting. even though they’re immediately hauling ass anyway just to be safe lmao

“my appearance is frightening to others” no shit Deku it’s because you look like a fucking alien exorcism. you look like a Lich that got caught up in an oil spill my dude

NO NOT THE CHOSEN ONE ANGST AGAIN

I RAN OUT OF ESSAY JUICE FOR THIS ALREADY HORIKOSHI!! I’VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT IT FOR MONTHS NOW WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG!! BUT ANYWAYS, GOOD!! I MEAN, BAD, THOUGH, OBVIOUSLY. BUT YES

“ENJOY THIS MONTAGE OF DEKU BATTLING A RANDOM KAIJU AND WANDERING THE WOODS LIKE A DERANGED GREEN BABA YAGA” okay yes but sir, exactly how much longer is this going to go on. if it’s a matter of you wanting to make sure we get it, let me assure you that aside from a few stray chuunis who think that Deku embracing the Darkness is the coolest thing he’s ever done, all of us here in fandom fully comprehend that this is Not Good

-- OH SO IT’S LIKE THAT

really. with the flashbacks to his loved ones’ smiling faces and everything. not even gonna try to aim above the belt, huh

AND NO KACCHAN??! NO CLASSMATES?!?! IS HE PURPOSELY NOT THINKING OF THEM??? OR ARE THEY BEING SAVED FOR THE NEXT PAGE??? SO HELP ME, IF THE NEXT PART OF THIS SENTENCE IS “CAN PROTECT THEM”, OR EVEN WORSE, “CAN SEE THEIR SMILING FACES AGAIN”, I...

WHAT DID I JUST SAY

(ETA: my man did Sero and Kaminari fucking dirty lmao. I miss their smiling faces too omg.)

the sheer, unparalleled irony of him saying this while he stands there looking like the gargoyle demon from Fantasia got crossed with an umbrella that got struck by lightning. Deku :(

oi who the fuck is this clown

is he controlling this mob with his evil hair. “what if I made an exhausted, running-on-fumes Deku battle a brainwashed mob at Ground Zero.” Horikoshi do you just have like a checklist of horrible things you want to do to your protagonist

easy there Sasori

well joke’s on you buddy because he’s apparently “completely fine”, so

“here’s to hoping that you know more about AFO’s location than the others” jesus christ Deku you really have hung your mercy out to dry huh

now he’s forcing his mob of terrified prisoners to attack Deku ahhhh. sucks to be them. at least they’re not being controlled by bees

so Deku is saying that Sasori’s control can be broken with “physical trauma.” similar to Shinsou’s quirk I guess. but so does that mean he’s gonna have to hurt them? ( •﹏•)

NO NOT MORE SAD EYES

“DEATH BY EMPATHY!!!” HORIKOSHI NO

fuck. he looks like he’s on the verge of passing out

this is what happens when you nerf a character’s self-preservation stats in favor of spamming their bone-breaking stats instead. NOW ACCEPTING BRAIN CELL DONATIONS FOR A BOY IN NEED!! with your loving generosity we can hopefully help him live to the ripe old age of seventeen

OMGFGGG

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

[grabs your hands] ლ(*꒪ヮ꒪*)ლ [swings you in a circle] へ(ﾟ◇ﾟへ)

THASSSSSSSS WHATSSSSSSS UPPPPPPPPPP

HORIKOSHI REALLY SAID FUCK THAT MASK (ノ°ο°)ノ YOU FINALLY LEARNED!! IT’S CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!!!

JUST FOR YOU KACCHAN, HORIKOSHI LEFT THIS ONE BAD GUY WHO’S STILL WEAK TO FIRE. GOD BLESS

IT’S YOUR COUNTERPART, KATSUKI B!!!! HOW WE DOIN OVER THERE IN THE TRIPPY COSMIC OFA SPACE REALM LOL. DO WE BELIEVE YET, FANDOM???

LIGHTS!!!!

INSTANT RESULTS!!! IT’S SUPER EFFECTIVE!!!

(ETA: imagine what this must look like to Deku though. he’s been caught up in this dark cloud of despair and exhaustion that’s been building up over... I’m gonna go ahead and say “weeks”, because yeah. and now he finds himself here, in the place where All Might’s legacy ended and the torch was passed to him. and the world is in ruins, and he’s surrounded by frightened people who are all trying to hurt him -- because who isn’t trying to hurt him, these days -- and he’s scrambling to figure this all out, but meanwhile the weariness is finally starting to catch up to him, and so he’s basically just standing there in a fog of complete and utter misery.

and then all of a sudden through that haze, he hears the one voice that’s more familiar than any other that he knows. like, I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if he thought he was just imagining it at first. Kacchan showing up to save him right when he’s at his most desperate and feeling the most alone. Kacchan, showing up to save him.

this is the person he always looked up to as a child (to be fair he was quite a strange child lmao). the person who was even closer to him than All Might. the person he always thought was amazing. and bam, here he is now. appearing in the sky out of nowhere to one-shot the bad guy with a single blast (which, btw, that was his armor-piercing attack too lmao dslkjlk take it easy there kiddo). like, that must have felt absolutely surreal to him, especially coming at a time when he’s already half-delirious and barely hanging on to reality. he must have really thought that he was losing it there for a second.

but he’s really there. it really is him. and for this brief moment -- before the rest of the situation catches up to him, and he remembers about all of the fucked-up AFO stuff, and remembers why he was so afraid and why he was pushing everyone away -- for just this one brief moment, he’s too exhausted and stunned to do anything except to just react. just stands there, looking up at him in awe.

and you know, it almost reminds me of...

just. you guys. the character development. the freaking character development. someone who brings reassurance. someone who shows up and makes you think, “oh, it’s all going to be okay now, because [person] is here.” the role reversals. the growth. the payoff!! because who is the one person who always had faith that Kacchan would one day grow up to become an amazing hero like that. WHO IS IT. YOU ALREADY KNOW.

omg. anyways, bless you Horikoshi, my feels which have been on backorder since fucking September have finally arrived lmao. yes, good, thank you. worth the wait. it is always, always worth the wait. fuck yeah.)

“LOWFRIES” SO YOU’RE TELLING ME THE WHOLE GANG IS HERE, AHHHHHHHH (º̩̩́⌣º̩̩̀ )

BEAUTIFUL. WONDERFUL. SENSATIONAL. I DON’T EVEN CARE THAT JUMP IS ON BREAK NEXT WEEK. THIS RIGHT HERE WILL SUSTAIN ME

[mayans-sauce]

Dr. Reyes

Pairing: Dr. Ez Reyes x Female Reader

Word Count: 1K

Warnings: some smut, hot doctor Ez

A/N: thank you @justlikebreathing for giving me this idea. And thank you Felipe Reyes for mentioning that Ez was supposed to become a doctor because THATS hot. I hope this turned out ok because I wrote it in like an hour or two! Also I had to make this a little hot somehow lol

Sign up HERE to join my taglist! Or let me know in a comment/ask/private message :)

GROUP CHAT for updates!

•• Main Masterlist •• Ez Masterlist ••

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

This was your first day at Dr. Reyes Family Clinic, and this was the first job you were having after finishing medical school. You were so excited to start working at a real place finally.

Your job, to begin with, would be to help out Dr. Reyes, to observe, and after some time, you would be able to handle your own patients as well as getting your own practice there.

You hadn’t met the doctor yet since all the planning went through his receptionist, but from what you had gathered around town since you moved to Santo Padre a week ago, was that he was a very young and handsome man as well as a brilliant doctor.

As you walked through the doors of the clinic, you were greeted by the receptionist, who introduced herself as Lydia. “Welcome, Y/N; we are so happy to have you here.” “Thank you! I’m so happy to start.” “Follow me if you’d like.”

She took you into a room where you could change into the clinic clothes. Lydia was lovely, and she would help you around with everything you needed. “Dr. Ezekiel will come shortly to introduce himself.”

You waited for a bit on the chair in the room. There was a knock on the door, and you rose from the seat. In walked the most handsome and sexiest man you had ever seen. He looked like a God that had been sculpted to perfection. On his coat, it said Dr. Ezekiel Reyes. This was the doctor? This man? Were you going to work with this beautiful creature? He looked more like a trainer or a model than a doctor, but you weren’t complaining.

You hadn’t realized that you zoned out, practically drooling at the sight until he tried to get your attention. “Hello? Hey? I’m doctor Reyes, but you can call me Ez if you want.”

“H-hi… so-sorry *nervous laugh* I’m Y/N. I will be working with you.”

“Yes, I know. Welcome Y/N,” a smirk was placed on his face as he had his hand out for you to shake, which you took gladly. His skin was warm and soft, and his big muscles flexed underneath his clothes as he squeezed the hand, making you weak in the knees.

This should be interesting and fun to work with him.

The first day wasn’t too big of a hassle. Only a few patients which left time for doctor Reyes to give you a tour of the place as well as show you how everything worked.

The following days were busy, and you were mesmerized by how amazing Ez was at his job. Not only was he sexy, but he was the most brilliant doctor you had met. He was sweet towards his patients; he cared for and loved them. He knew his stuff and was incredibly smart with medicine and knowledge in general.

You also couldn’t help but daydream about him. One time he took off his coat which left him only in a button-down white shirt that hugged his muscles so tightly. He looked delicious, his biceps flexing with every move he made. A few tattoos decorated his arms which made him even more handsome, if that was possible.

He complimented you whenever he let you take a patient, and he quickly realized that you could do all of this without his help. A practice of your own wasn’t too far ahead. You almost passed out one time when he called you a good girl. He 100% noticed and had his shit-eating grin on his face.

You and Ez developed a friendship instantly. He would regularly invite you to the nearest bar to have a relaxing evening after a full day's work.

Those times in the bar were the moments you would fall more and more in love with him. The lights dimmed as you and he sat maybe a little bit too close for just a couple of friends. The conversation and drinks would last for hours, talking about everything and nothing.

It had been about two months since you started working at Dr. Reyes Family Clinic. You couldn’t have asked for anything better with this job. The few people working there had become like family. The patients were talkative and the most loving people. Dr. Reyes was intelligent and sexy as always, and you were 100% in love with him now, but you didn’t want anything to ruin what you had, so you kept your mouth shut.

You were rummaging in the supply closet to stock up on some things. The door opened, and to your surprise, it was no other than Dr. Reyes standing there, looking at you with a look you had never seen before. It made you scared… but turned on at the same time.

“D-doctor Reyes, what are you doing here?”

“Doctor, huh? I love when you say that,” he said with a dark and deep tone. A voice that had you wanting to get on your knees and suck him off right then and there.

“Are we doing this Y/N?” He took slow steps towards you, which made you back into the wall.

“D-doing what, doctor?” You played dumb and innocent. Of course, you knew where this was going. What else would this be right now? It had you screaming on the inside of finally, maybe, having him take you in the supply closet that you had dreamed about every night.

“Don’t play dumb, be a good girl. You know what I’m talking about,” he stood in front of you now.

“I think you need to show me, doctor Reyes,” you whispered against his lips. His hand came to wrap around your throat to squeeze you lightly.

“I will. Right here, right now…”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Thank you for reading❤️ a quick reblog and feedback would be so appreciated❤️

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[julesclues]

fake dating

“you’re cute when you’re angry” //chapter 6

warnings: mentions of sex (obviously) and some angst if you squint

pairings: jj maybank x reader

word count: 3.26k

you yawn, blinking your eyes a couple times. you feel a warmth coming from underneath you and realize that both you and jj had fallen asleep while watching the movie. you glance at the clock and read the time 6:48pm. you look up at jj, and see his eyes closed, hair in his face, and mouth open slightly. he was snoring a bit, which you thought was adorable. you move some of the hair out of his face using your right hand, making him groan softly and open his eyes. you retract your hand, still looking up at him. “hi,” you whisper, as he smiles at you with slanted eyes.

“why hello,” he beams, making you giggle. you get off of him and stretch, throwing your shoes on. “where’re you going?” he mumbles in a raspy voice you find a little too hot. “the kegger, remember? you’re coming too.” he groans and throws his head back in the pillow. “i can’t y/n, i have polio. i cant walk.” you slap his back and he jerks up, glaring at you. “you don’t have polio you big baby. just come on,” you huff, getting annoyed. though you had some sort of feelings for jj, you still would get mad at him. just because you two were faking dating, doesn’t mean that what he did to you in the past just magically went away. he still bullied you, called you names, and put slime in your hair. besides, after you two “break up,” you’ll go back to being enemies and you can take your little crush and throw it down the drain.

“jj,” you hiss through your teeth, not wanting to get into an argument with him. “fine, medusa, i’m coming,” he comments and gets up, making you roll your eyes and head for the door. “i’ll text kie that we’re on our way,” you say, looking down at your phone. he grunts while putting on his sneakers, and you snort in laughter. “you’re such an old man,” you comment, making him grin. “an old man? i’m 5 months older than you.” you roll your eyes with a smile and grab the door knob. “exactly,” you state looking over your shoulder, and he gets up, following you with a smile as you open the door. you both run downstairs, hoping your family wasn’t there because of the incident that only happened a couple hours ago. but, knowing your luck, they were.

your father glares at jj, not even taking in your presence, which made you tilt your head in confusion. you were confused as to why he wasn’t mad at you instead. it made you think if something else happened after you stormed upstairs.

“ignore him,” you whisper to jj, seeing his knuckles turn white from how hard he was holding his fist. he nods down at you hesitantly, still making silent eye contact with your father. you both exit the house, but before you could go any further than a couple steps away, you stop jj by grabbing his wrist. he turns around to you and questions why you stopped him. “did he say anything to you when i ran upstairs before?” you ask, looking up into jj’s eyes. his eyebrows furrow a bit as his ocean blue eyes search your face. “no,” he lies. you didn’t believe him, but if he didn’t want to tell you about it, then you knew something bad must’ve went down.

“did you say anything?” you question, making him stomp his foot in frustration. “stop with the questions y/n,” he demands, making you flinch. “why?” you ask, with a disgusted face, making him groan. “what did i just say?” he responds nastily, as you roll your eyes due to his unexpected anger. you huff, walking past him and towards the beach. “where are you going?” he yells from behind you, throwing his hands in the air. “i thought we weren’t supposed to be asking questions!” you bite back, throwing a middle finger in the air, still walking. “y/n l/n, you’re so annoying!” he yells. you groan in frustration and yell back in the same tone. “right back at you jj maybank!”

ten minutes pass as you finally make it to the kegger by yourself. you spot your friends sitting around a bonfire, and you smile, running up to them. “hey losers!” you smile, sitting down next to sarah. “what’s up idiot?” kie asks you, and you chuckle. “where’s jj?” pope asks, looking around. you sink in your seat a bit as john b hands you an opened beer. “hell if i know,” you say casually, taking a sip of your beer. the pouges look around at one another as you wipe your mouth. “he’s your boyfriend. weren’t you guys going to come here together? besides, jj never misses a kegger,” john b comments, and all you do is shrug. “we got into a fight,” you blandly say. “what happened?” sarah asks with concern, and you close your eyes, taking a long inhale.

“nothing worth mentioning,” you exclaim, trying hard to move on from the topic. you didn’t want to think about jj right now. you two hated each other at the beginning of the week and now you had a love-hate relationship? it didn’t make sense to you. one day jj was treating you like he hated you and the next, he was treating you like he was your boyfriend, even if you were alone with him. you were so confused, but had no right to judge. you were doing the same thing, but only because you knew it was wrong of you to take advantage of the fake dating situation. jj’s reason, however, was unknown to you. you thought for a second that he could be thinking the same thing you were. but that thought was instantly removed from your mind. he didn’t like you as a person, so why would he be feeling something more? besides, he’s the reason you two hate each other anyways.

“alright,” sarah says, still not fully believing you. “i’m gonna go get us some more drinks,” you say, shaking your already empty beer. “you guys want anything?” you ask, getting up with a grunt. kie asks for another beer, while everyone else replies with a no. walking over to wear the drinks are, you bend down to grab two more beers. you turn around, as your body collides with another. “i’m sorry!” you apologize, looking up at the 6 foot brunette that stood in front of you. “it’s not problem beautiful,” he says with a british accent. hot, you think to yourself. “are you visiting?” you ask, and he chuckles at your small attempt to start a conversation with him. “is it that obvious?” he smirks. you smile and giggle. “yeah.. it’s the accent that gave it away.” he smiles at you and you offer your hand. “i’m y/n,” you state. “i’m–“

“hey babe,” you here a voice from behind you as an arm swings over your shoulder. you turn to your right and see jj, his face kind of red. “i didn’t know you had a boyfriend,” the guy in front of you says, causing you to turn your head towards him. “oh no, we’re ju–“

before you could finish your sentence, jj pulls you to face him and kisses you roughly on the lips. you’re taken aback by the kiss, but slowly sink into it while kissing him back. after a couple seconds, you hesitantly pull away and pant, staring into jj’s eyes. he breaks eye contact with you, still holding you close. “she’s taken,” he says sternly. “funny,” the guy laughs. “she didn’t mention any boyfriend.” jj’s hand turns into a fist, but you put your hand on his shoulder. “come with me,” you hiss. “i’m sorry but he’s drunk,” you say to the guy with a small smile. “no i’m–“

“shut up!” you interrupt. “i have to go, but it was nice to meet you,” you say, and the guy smalls softly, waving with a “it’s cool.”

you pull jj all the way to your home. your parents weren’t home and your little sister was probably at some party herself.

you throw him into your room and slam the door. “what the fuck was that!?” you yell, putting your hands on your hips. “you’re cute when you’re angry,” he smirks jokingly. you scoff in annoyance.

“you think i’m cute when i’m angry? well get ready because i’m about to be gorgeous,” you yell at jj, and he instant loses his smirk. “why are you so mad at me! all i did was kiss yo–“ you interrupt him and run your hands through your hair. “i’m not mad you kissed me j! i’m mad that you kissed me without letting me know first! remember the rules? one of them was that if i want you to kiss me, i have to say it! it can’t be unexpected!” he scoffs while hearing your words. “you’re being ridiculous right now y/n! you’re getting mad because your boyfriend kissed you?”

“we’re not dating! and besides, you were being a jealous asshole! this was a mistake! i cant keep doing this jj!” his eyes go soft, and he almost looks upset. “what do you mean?” he asks softly.

the truth was, you loved kissing jj. if you could do it everyday of the week, you would without hesitation. feeling his lips on yours brought you an insane amount of joy and comfort. but kissing him for the very first time without warning was not what you wanted. you didn’t want it to be like that. you didn’t want it to be fake.

you walk up to your sock drawer and scramble through it, pulling out a $100 bill. “just take the money,” you say, looking down and handing the bill to jj. “i’ll just tell my parents we broke up, and we can go back to hating each other.” you wave the money in his face, but he shakes his head. “i don’t want it,” he states, pushing your hand away. “what?” you whisper, looking up at him. “you’re mad at me,” he comments, and you put your hands on your hips. “oh really? thanks for letting me know,” you exclaim sarcastically. he rolls his eyes and continues to speak. “you’re not acting the way you normally would. just calm down, and call me before you go to bed. and if not, then call me in the morning.” you blink a couple of times, and look down at the $100. “but the week is almost up,” you say after a slight pause. “it’s thursday. we’re only supposed to be dating for a week.”

jj walks closer to you and shoots you a small smile. “i’m not sorry i kissed you, but i’m sorry that it made you mad,” he explains, ignoring your statement about the end of the week. “if i knew it was going to make you mad, i wouldn’t have done it.” you sigh at the boy’s words, wishing you could explain to him that him kissing you didn’t make you mad. it was just the unexpectedness of it. but all that could come out of your mouth was a simple, “thanks.” you look down at the money, and hold it up. “are you sure?” you ask, waving it around. “nah,” he yawns. “besides, it feels like prostitution if you pay me.” you giggle and he smiles at you with soft eyes.

“i’m still mad at you,” you admit, but his smile never leaves his face. “like i said my love: you look cute when you’re mad.” and with that, he goes to your bedroom door, ready to leave. before leaving, he turns to you and you furrow your eyebrows. “do you want me to stay?” of course you wanted him to stay. you loved feeling his warmth next to you. but even more than that, you didn’t want jj to go home. you didn’t want him to go home to his horrible excuse of a father. more worse than yours. every part of you wanted to say yes. but you didn’t. you were too mad at him. you didn’t want to love someone who wouldn’t love you back.

“i– um.. no j. i’ll call you tomorrow.” you turn around and slip into your bed, your back facing the door. you hear the door open and close, signaling that jj had left. instantly, tears leave your eyes. you knew you were being a little ridiculous with the whole situation, but you couldn’t help but feel upset. you didn’t want any of this to happen the way it was. you wanted to kiss jj on both of your terms. you wanted to kiss him because you loved each other. you didn’t want him to kiss you because he was pretending. you wanted the real thing.

the next morning, you groan and slowly open your eyes. you realized you slept in your clothes from the night before. the clock read 11:37am. you crawled out of bed with a stretch and a yawn, grabbing your phone.

4 missed calls from jj :)

you instantly call him back, worry filling your body. you thought something terrible had happened to him. he answers with a groan. “hello?” his groggily voice responds, and you sigh in relief. “are you okay?” you ask concerning. you hear his bed creak, signaling that he was now sitting up. “why wouldn’t i be?” he asks, and you start pacing around your room. “you called me 4 times jj,” you remind him. “oh,” he chuckles breathlessly. “that was just to make sure you were okay from last night. since you didn’t answer i just went back to sleep.”

last night. you had forgotten about that. “can you come over in an hour?” you ask in a low voice. “i need to talk to you.” jj was silent for a moment, before responding with, “okay,” in a slight whisper. you hang up the phone after saying your goodbyes all fall back onto the bed with a loud sigh. you didn’t want to end things with jj, even if they were just a sham.

you enjoyed getting to know him more, taking care of him, flirting with him, laughing with him, kissing him. of course you wanted all of those things. but only if they were real. you were in love with jj maybank. but you didn’t want to get more hurt than you already were. all of this was fake. and that’s all it was ever going to be.

45 minutes later, jj shows up at your door, and you invite him in. your parents were working and your little sister had a sleepover at one of her friend’s house from the night before. you open the door for him and welcome him inside. you both sit down on the couch and you turn to him, making him question why you even called him here to begin with. however, he was wondering even further as to why he came with no hesitation.

“is everything okay?” he asks after a moment of silence. you pull out the $100 from your pocket and put it in his lap. “y/n–“ he starts, but you cut him off with a shake of your head. “we need to stop this,” you exclaim, getting straight to the point. he blinks a couple times in disbelief as you continue. “i know it was my idea to begin with, but the week is almost up anyways. i know us, we probably would’ve said ‘let’s do one more week to prove john b wrong’ or something stupid like that. i just..” you take a deep breath in and look down into your lap, not daring to dart your eyes into jj’s. “we’ll just go back to being enemies and that’s that, okay?” jj shakes his head slightly and opens his mouth to say something, but nothing comes out. all he could come up with, was a simple, “why?”

“i-“ you stutter, not knowing what to say. you didn’t want to admit to jj that you were falling in love with him. you didn’t want to admit to jj that you wanted the real thing. you were afraid of rejection, but you were even more afraid of losing the boy. “i don’t want to be your enemy anymore princess,” jj says, and you look up at him. “stop with the nicknames jj,” you hiss. “but princ–“

“what did i just say? jj please. just take the money, accept what i said, and leave!” you yell, making him even more confused than before. “why are you getting upset with me?!” he yells back in the same tone. “jj please!” you beg, a tear slipping from your eye. “y/n just tell me what to do and i’ll do it! we don’t have to pretend anymore but i want you to be in my life. i don’t want to keep fighting you anymore.” you look down and shake your head. “i don’t want to fight either but that’s all we seem to be doing when we’re together. can you just.. can you leave? please? i need to be alone for now, okay?” you ask him with sincerity, and he hesitantly nods. he gets up, “forgetting” the $100 on the couch. “jj take th–“

“green,” he says, out of no where. his back was faced to you as you look over the back of the couch. he was facing the door, with his hand on it, the other one in his long shorts. “what..?” you whisper as another tear falls down your face. “remember the night i slept over? we spoke about things we don’t like, or the things we do. i told you my favorite color was green, and you said you didn’t like thunder but you loved the rain.” you smile slightly at the thought, hoping he didn’t see your instant change in emotions. “what about it?” you ask blandly. “we didn’t fight. it was just me and you, and we didn’t fight.”

you sigh and look up at him. “it wasn’t a big deal, i barely remember it myself,” you lie. of course you remembered it. it was the first time you and jj actually spoke like human beings. “you’ve got to remember y/n. your mom made us some sort of pastry.. ugh, i don’t remember what it was, but it was good,” he swoons. “anyways,” he continues with a huff. “i’ll just go. i’m sorry.” he apologizes, not necessarily knowing what he was apologizing for, but he still felt sorry. he turns the door knob and opens the door, but the sound of your soft voice made him stop in his tracks.

“cinnamon rolls,” you exclaim. he turns around to you. “what?” he asks with a confused look on his face. “she made us cinnamon rolls.” he looks at you and a smile creeps up on his face. “cinnamon rolls,” he repeats lowly, looking down to his feet. and with that, he takes another look at you, before shutting the door completely and walking away.

you were in love with jj maybank.

and it hurt like hell.

🏷 tag list: @spencereidbasis @lonely-kermit @pankow1218 @downbytheouterbanks @softtfordrew @maybanksbaby @teamnick @diverrdown @merchantjjreply @k-k0129 @broken-jj @obxmxybxnk @euphoriapains @sofianunes10 @1d5sosddl @peterparkour15 @hales-a-bells @bailspogue @lemur46 @prejudic3 @itsagurl @castiel-savvy18 @drewswannabegirl @queenofthepouges @harryswigss @lunaposey @largedenominationsplease @kay667 @poguestyle17 @itsyagirljay @agirlwholovescoffee @illbesafeforyou @poguestyleskye @httpstarkey @jjpoperights @netflix-imagines @mijnliefste @anotheryoungin @mitchloveswriting @cheshirecat107 @danicarosaline @nearlydanger9 @marvel-ousnesss @brie-gr3y @otrbnks @mayleenmaybank1 @wallsrudy @ifilwtmfc @fandomsinapile @collectiveuniverses @mcdison @antoheartit @kayladownunder @6ultra6violence6

[calumthoodshands]

2021 Writing Self-Evaluation!

thank you @burstingsunrise and @daydadahlias my dear friends this is terrifying for my baby writer ass but i guess i’ll try! Under the cut

1. Number of stories posted to AO3: seven

2. Word count posted for the year: 164,489

3. Fandoms I wrote for: 5sos only!

4. Pairings: so far we’re cake exclusive but well i’m caught up in a story since literally march so

5. Story with the most Kudos/Bookmarks/Comments:

all of them and surprising to no one, are from Days in the sun. i sometimes lose my mind a little when i look at the number of kudos being over 100. how. how!! and so many comments!! over 30!! bat shit insane. i’m glad people like it but it does stun me every day

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why):

i’m gonna name two bc the reasons are different. Dits, because it’s the biggest fic i have written and ever will write, bc i managed to keep a story up in over 130 k words without losing the plot, bc i myself love the world i created in it. everytime i finish a chapter i’m baffled at myself that i’m actually doing this. that i’m writing this fic for soon a whole year.

the second one is probably The easy way out. it’s in no way a particularly outstanding fic, its not long or incredibly short or anything, but i’m proud of how it came to be. i wrote it in one go in just a few hours, i got the exact vibes across that i wanted, and it even did quite well for some reason. i like it a lot

7. Work I’m least proud of (and why):

i do have a fic i am not proud of but i dont see a point in mentioning it

8. Share or describe a favorite review you received:

okay i want to mention several people bc im me and these all made me cry

starting off with megs @igarbagecannoteven bc seriously every comment she leaves on dits makes my heart hurt bc theyre so detailed and really make me believe that i’m not just doing nonsense but actually. like. having an effect on people with what i’m writing. i appeciate it more than i can put into words

second of all was that one time i got a random ask from c @soggyburgers and it was in the very beginning still and out of all fics, about my sad fic high above the city lights. i couldn’t believe someone actually read my stuff. and thought it was good. i seriously think about that message almost every month at least once. i’m still sorry i made you cry, c, i hope you’ve forgiven me

third, and a must for me to mention is the playlist des @cakes-curls made all by herself for dits. when i tell you i cried for half an hour. that my fic had such an impact someone would actually sit down and invest the time to find songs that fit the fic and the vibes????????????????? i’m. i can’t. i’ve talked about it a lot of times already and still dont know what to say to express how much it means to me.

9. A time when writing was really, really hard:

i had a huge writer’s block at one point. i think it took me a month to finish a 3 k word chapter. but also right now, i was struggling with the new chapter for dits, then i was gone over new years, and i have so much to do and i cant sort my thoughts enough to get any further. i’m incredibly frustrated atm. i also constantly think about how i dont give characterisation enough thought.

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you:

probably the first kiss in dits! i had it planned completely different in the beginning, only for it to take not only WAY TOO MANY CHAPTERS but also to happen in a completely different setting.

11. A favorite excerpt of your writing:

i literally can’t if anyone has suggestions hit me up i’m too tired and there are too many words

12. How did you grow as a writer this year:

i mean. i started this year. i learned how to write. how to make sentences flow. those kinda things. basics

13. How do you hope to grow next year:

I really wanna keep an eye on characterisation and i really really need to broaden my vocabulary

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

actually, i think all the writers in the club. the fact that we have a community where you can ask the most stupid questions, where you can always ask for advice, even just reading what other people write and ask about. but also just reading their fics in general. meg’s and molly’s cake fics and jess’ were so good they were the last push to get me into fic writing. but also special mention to molly. thanks for always answering my dumb ass questions no matter when or what and helping me w fic ideas <3

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year:

oh definitely. i was in france!! i was where the magic happens!! but also just personal perceptions of things and preferences, but i won’t specify anything. i cant afford to be perceived even more

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

write. just write. dont be afraid of ideas going to ‘waste’. dont be afraid of writing things u can’t do. if you dont post it, who will know about it? no one but you. always write it down, no matter how small the idea. u can always edit, but u cant get ideas back.

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

i have several fics i want to write, but as long as im on dits still, i dont have the brain capacity to work on other longer projects. i would love to write the neighbour fic, or the ballet fic.

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read.

I’m probably the last rn so if you read this and wanna do this pretend i tagged you!!

[writes-eat-sleep-repeat]

Seeing Red

Prompt: PMS days

Pairing: Spooky x Reader

Warning/ notes: Major fluff. Not grammatically correct. Currently on my menses which inspired this one shot. Hope it can comfort other spooky lovers during their time of the month. Enjoy ;)

Summary: Spooky takes care of his girlfriend when she’s on her menses. Just him and her!

Word count: 2063

As you opened your eyes you peered through the curtains of your room and noticed it was a rainy day outside in LA. The sky was somewhere between a light gray and the cusp of a white. They kind of color that hurt your eyes if you stared at it to long. Rubbing the sleep out of your eyes you rolled over on your back and instantaneously felt the stinging in our stomach. It was day two of your menses. They worst day of them all. often you thought about what it might feel like to get shot and came to the conclusion it couldn’t possibly be any worse than this. While you laid back staring up at the ceiling you heard your phone vibrate. Looking over all you could mutter was “shit” 8 miss calls and 15 text. You looked at the clock on the nightstand to your left 10:00 am. Opening the text you scroll to the top and began reading

‘Hey mama’-3:15 pm

Missed call 3:30 pm

‘Hello’-4:00pm

Missed call 5:00 pm

‘Y/N’-5:30 pm

Missed call 6:00 pm

‘Y/N pick up the phone’- 6:30 pm

The calls and messages entwined like this for the next couple of hours until you guess your boyfriend finally fell asleep. You cant believe you slept for basically 19 hours straight. Aside from a few bathroom and water breaks where you had to use all the power you could muster up to complete those task, you somehow forgot to check your phone. Throwing your arm over your face to block out what little light was peaking through the window you could hear your roommate/ best friend Rebecca getting ready for work. BUZZZZ someone rang the doorbell. You heard him before you saw him. Out in the living room talking with you bestie, ‘where is Y/N’ he asked her. Oh no. He sounds pissed.

You laid frozen with your hand over your arm wanting the earth to swallow you whole. ‘She’s not feeling well’ you heard Rebecca respond. You always avoided Oscar on days like this because you were afraid to get mad and finally scare him away with your crazy . He burst into your room bringing the bright light from the hallway with him. You felt the irritation slowly building. Removing your hand with a sigh you look over to your right at the door. ‘Couldn’t pick up your phone’ he asked with a particular edge to his voice that brought out your annoyance to what seemed to be instantaneously. ‘I was sleeping’ you said letting acid seep into your voice. ‘For a fucking day’ he yelled. That’s it, you thought sitting up it bed which was followed by a gush of blood below causing you further annoyance.

“I’m not dealing with your shit today. 1. I spoke to you yesterday afternoon and its only 10 am meaning it wasn’t a whole fucking day. 2. Becca told you I wasn’t feeling well and instead of coming in here and asking if I’m okay you choose too come in here and yell at me like your my daddy. 3. Your not my daddy 4. My hormones are all over the place and I literally feel like i am dying so unless you plan on helping and not being an ass I suggest you leave.’ Oscar who you never ever send away looked more hurt than even mad that you yelled at him. He never took that kind of disrespect from anyone being the gang leader he is. ‘Okay, well.. what’s wrong? ummm... how can I help?’ he asked. ‘ you cant’ you replied. “Y?N...” ‘I have to go to the store and get some stuff.’ You swung you legs of the bed and tried to stand up only to be meet with crippling pain. Before you could even fully bend over to hold your stomach Oscar was there pushing you back onto the bed. ‘Your not driving like this’ he said. ‘Tell me what you need and ill get it for you’ he finished. ‘ you cant, ok its personal girl stuff’ you replied shyly. ‘ I didn’t ask you what it was. I said to tell me what you need’ he sternly answered. After writing a list that and handing it to him he said he’ll be back in 15 minutes. You took this time to take some pain medication and crawl to the bathroom just barely managing to take a shower while he was gone. Rebecca poked her head in to let you know she was heading out so you knew it was time to leave the shower so you could let Oscar back in. Standing in your room trying to figure out what to wear you decided on a pair of black leggings and one of oscars hoodie that you stole from him. You just needed to be comfy. As you were pulling the hoodie down over your head you heard the door buzzz. Heading out the the front door you pulled it open to find Oscar with 4 shopping bags. He walked past you to the kitchen and put them on the counter. ‘What exactly did you buy Oscar I only asked for a pack of pads and a soda” you asked quizzically, with what you were sure was a confused look on your face.

‘Well you said always overnight but they had 2 different kinds and I didn’t want to call you so I got both and then i got you some Advil, i mean I don’t know if that works for that kind of pain’ he said gesturing towards your stomach ‘but, i got it anyway and the lady at the store said it was good and suggested i get you something sweet and I couldn’t decide on one, so i bought one of every candy and...’ he didn’t get to finish his rambling because you walked over to him and kissed him lovingly to interrupting, he responded by holding your neck firmly in place and meeting you with the same level of passion. Pulling away for oxygen you looked up into the liquid brown eyes of Oscar Diaz and all you could say is ‘I love You’. “Go sit down mama I’m making breakfast” was his response. “Ummmm...I kinda wanted ice cream for breakfast’ you said. ‘Ice cream is not breakfast. No wonder i cant get cesear to eat any real food’ he teased you. Knowing you looked after the younger Diaz while he was locked up. ‘Hey. I eat real food but today my a baby maker wants ice cream so, I eat ice cream’ you joked. Walking over to the couch in the living room knowing he will never let you eat the ice cream first.

Settling down under the black throw that was on the couch you began to flick through Netflix trying to find something to watch. Settling on a romantic comedy. It wasn’t t long before Oscar walked over with your plate in hand. You couldn’t help but laugh as he approached you in Rebecca’s -queen of the kitchen-apron. Your attention then turned on the intoxicating smell drifting off the plate in his hand and settling in your nose. Homemade fluffy pancakes, eggs and fried salami (Oscar knew you weren’t a bacon person). He handed you the plate and placed his on the coffee table before heading back to the kitchen to remove the apron and grab your drinks. By the time he returned you were already half way through your meal. As he sat down to begin his meal. You were full and much more happy, you still couldn’t escape what you could only assume to be a stabbing taking place in your stomach but this is as happy as you were gonna get. You were content. Watching Oscar eat you eyes drifted to the santos tattoo on is neck and dirty thoughts began popping into your head. Just filthy thoughts, scooting a little closer to your man you kissed it midway him bringing some eggs to his mouth. He paused looking at you from the side through those long eyelashes with a lifted eyebrow.

That put your hormones in overdrive, you wanted him now! ‘ I liked the breakfast’ was all you could manage. Shaking his head he returned to his meal. You kissed his tattoo again, then licked it and then began sucking it. You hadn’t realized Oscar had put his dish down when he lifted you onto his lap. You were face to face, sitting on his lap you noticed he was a little hard. Biting your lip and now staring at his lips thinking of all the possibilities you could do with his mouth he smiled. Damnit the dimples. At this point you couldn’t blame the full wetness on the blood. Ugh, why did you have to have a period. ‘Hi’ he said still smiling. “Hi” you smiled back, clearing your throat “ummm... I really, really liked the breakfast” you continued. “I appreciate the gratitude and the delivery of it but, I don’t think you should start something you cant finish right now in your current state” he replied. ‘Oh’ you answered climbing off of him bringing you knees to your chest. You know his rejection was well placed and he was right but with your hormones all over the place it hit you harder than you expected. ‘Hey, hey he said moving it closer to you. You know I would do absolutely terrible things to you Mi amor, but your not at 100 right now and I don’t want you feel like you have to have sex for me to stay. Okay? He asked. ‘Yeah, umm.. that wasn’t for you but, Okay.’ nodding you moved over to curl up next to him as he finished his meal. Peaking up at him every now ad then you started thinking about how you both had changed.

You knew Oscar essentially Your entire life. Your dad’s were cool and so Oscar spent a lot of time in your fathers auto shop learning, since your dad never had a son he welcomed the apprenticeship. You were no tomboy and completely against anything other than reading. It wasn’t that far fetched you and Oscar began dating in high school. You remembered the first time getting your period and trying to explain what was happening to him; you not even knowing yourself. ‘So your bleeding’ twelve year old Oscar asked. ‘Yes’ you replied. ‘From your Vagina’ he whispered. ‘ yes’ you whispered back. “So... why does this happen?’ He asked. ‘Well my mom said when you are growing up it happens when you don’t have a baby. I think’ you replied. ‘So, your body is hurting you because you don’t have a baby?’he asked. ‘Ummm... yeah, I guess’ you answered. ‘So why not just have a baby? Said Oscar ‘ I asked that too, my dad said because he’ll kill me. So I guess I’m suppose to just suffer in silence’ you answered.

The memory bought a smile to your face and a small giggle escaped your lips causing Oscar to glance down quizzically at you now cuddled up next to him with your head on his shoulders. “ I was just remembering the first time I got my period and you thought having a baby would be the answer to all my menses related problems” you answered his unspoken question. ‘It still could be’ was all he replied shaking his head’ Smiling, most likely remembering the memory too. ‘I’m sorry I yelled at you earlier’ he continued. ‘It’s just being me...well people... its hard...-I know’ you cut him of. ‘Being you is hard and you not only have to think about you but the gang as well , Cesar....Me. I know you, your head goes to the worst possible scenario automatically. I know how worried you get. I should have checked my phone. I’m sorry too” you said pecking him on the cheek. With a quick nod of the head he returned his attention back to the screen. He wasn’t a man of many words. You two watched movies for the rest of the night. There were far and few instances when you had Oscar to yourself. When he was Oscar and not spooky. You relished these moments, these feelings and saved them for times when being is girlfriend seems less than ideal. For tonight, it’s enough to just cuddle up with your man and watch a movie.

[spookypotato]

Maybe a fic where after Sirius’ ankle is broken initially ( like the first couple of hours after) they think he won’t be able to play again because the doctors thought it was worse than it was and the team are told to prepare for the worst and we get to see their reactions :(

Sorry lol I’m just OBSESSED with your writing, I get so giddy reading them bc they are so so perfect

Thank you so, so much! It means a lot someone enjoys my writing that much. And please dont apologise for giving me good ideas to write and compliments that make my day!💛

Okay, I don't know if this is what you wanted. But I hope you like it anyway! Sorry I took longer than last time. I haven't forgotten about any prompts, I just had a bit of a block.

Characters, again, by the wonderfully talented @lumosinlove! Thank you!💜

The lights were too bright. But Sirius tired to open his eyes anyway. James was sitting next to him. How the hell had he gotten into his house?! Then memories came back, cracking of bones, emergency sirens, a stadium erupting in booing noises.

He was in the hospital. His foot hurt a lot less than he expected, but it was also in a splint at the moment.

As soon as James noticed, that Sirius was awake -or at least had his eyes semi open- he hugged him rather aggressively.

"Mate, idiot, I thought you were dying!", James voice was muffled by the pillows.

"I did tell him, that you would 100% survive, though.", Remus interrupted Sirius thought process.

Not really being able to say anything yet, he just took in the scene he was presented with.

The cubs, off to the far left of his room, had probably just stopped playing a game with Olli. The cards were all over the table and Sirius couldnt even try to guess what they had been playing. But they were all facing him now.

Next to them Kasey sat a bit further away, but clearly in a position were he could look into Logans and Finns cards and observe the game.

In the middle of the room stood Kuny, Nado, Dumo, Thomas and pretty much their whole team. They barely fit into the room.

To the left stood Arthur and Moody, both relieved at him being awake. They had probably been discussing something about the season.

Right on his bed sat James. Still hugging him. Sirius wouldn't put it past him, to just stay like that for the next few days. Lily was sitting next to his bed on the right, reading her magazine. She was clearly not surprised about James' behaviour.

And then there was Remus. Probably sitting the closest to him after, off course James. Right to his left. There was no magazine or playing cards or even his smartphone anywhere close to him. He might have just arrived. Although he did look a bit too tired for that. Remus looked relieved, but also somehow pained.  Sirius didnt know if it was, because of his ankle or because of something else.

His thoughts were interrupted by James, again. "Sirius, are you with us?"

Now the whole room was staring at him.

"Ouais, je suis réveillé.", it came out as a raspy sound. "Can I-", he coughed. "Can I have some water, please?"

James got his water not even a split second after, from his bedside table. He almost spilt the contents over the hospital sheets.

After he drank the entire cup in one go, he put it back next to his bed. He only realised now that there were flowers and chocolate there.

Chocolate- how ironic. No one in a hockey team would ever gift another hockey player chocolate. It wasnt on their meal plan. How long would he be gone, if he was allowed to eat chocolate?! He would be able to play again, right? Panic went through his entire body.

That moment a doctor came in. Everybody looked at her expectantly.

"Mr. Black", she started, "you broke your ankle, and you were in surgery, a few hours ago. I'm glad to see you have already woken up. That's a good sign. I have to inform you however that there were complications with the surgery, so you'll probably not be allowed to leave for at least the next week. Also-"

"I'm sorry, doctor, but that wont be possible.", Sirius interrupted her. "We have a very important game this weekend, and not only do I need to play, but I need to practice. I can stay no longer than today."

I would have been funny, that Sirius Black tried to debate with a Doctor about his body's state, but in this situation the doctors expression seemed to morph into a sad one.

"I wasnt suggesting it, Mr. Black. You will stay here, for at least a week. After that, we'll check on your state and if we decide to let you go home, you'll have to rest for at least 10 weeks to let the bone fully heal"

"But-", Sirius tried to say, but was cut of by the doctor again.

It was like a child complaining about not being allowed to have a certain toy.

"Once your bone has fully healed, you'll need to learn how to properly walk on it again."

"And afterwards I can start practice again?", Sirius sounded like he at least tried to accept his fate. He wouldn't be able to play the whole season.

"I dont think that will be what's happening. I'm sorry to inform you, but at the moment, it doesn't look like your ankle would handle the pressure of being on the ice in a professional state again."

"Does that mean he can never play again?", James asked, his voice sounded a bit shot.

It was only then that Sirius realised again, that he wasnt alone in the room.

"As it is now, no. I'm sorry. It could potentially change, but it is highly unlikely", the doctor told them. Even she didnt seem as neutral now as when she appeared. But then again, all of gryffindor loved their lions. She was probably almost as devastated as any other person in gryffindor.

"Thank you", was the only thing Sirius could choke out. This was all to much information at once.

As the doctor wanted to leave, James got up.

"Cant you bloody do something?! Anything? Please? We need him. Anything?"

The doctor just repeated herself. "I'm sorry, but as of now, the only thing we can do is wait how Sirius body reacts to the injury." With that she left the room, Arthur and Moody following her.

James sat down again. And hugged Sirius tightly and awkwardly, because he was still lying on the hospital bed. "Please tell me if you need anything, Pads.", he whispered.

The rest of the room hadnt said a word until now. Sirius was thankful for it. But they were all staring at him. Waiting for some kind of reaction.

"Guys, I'm fine.", Sirius lied. "How did the snakes game end? I want every detail."

He didnt listen. But he was pretty sure someone explained.

So many emotions were running through his mind.

He was furious. At Snape for hitting him. At the world for making it happen to him. At the doctors for not doing more. At himself for blaming everything else except himself.

He was sad. This was it. His career was over. He would maybe sit on the bench during games, if the team would even let him. He probably wasnt even part of the team anymore. He would be able to come to the first few games. And then fewer and fewer. Until the crowd had forgotten him. Until the team had forgotten him. Until he was just an ex-hockey player, sat in this massive house, alone and unwanted, all over again.

"Sirius.", a gentle voice pulled him out of his thoughts. "Sirius, are you listening?" It was Remus', his hand now on Sirius' arm. As he looked down Loops pulled it away.

"Yeah, no, a bit, sorry." Sirius replied, " I was a bit lost in thought." As the rest of the team almost gave him a another sad look, he added "Just thinking about your new training plans and how exhausted you will all be. Next time you need to show the damn snakes not to mess with lions." This was one of the first times he wished, he could be exhausted with them.

The team didn't laugh. Logan moved his chair closer to Sirius bed.

"Next time we'll win. For you."

"Wow, if I would have known it just needed at hit, to get you more ambitious, I would have been down months ago.", Sirius joked. It wasnt funny. He didn't even laugh himself, although he tried. It came out as a short, bitter one.

The team was staring at him again. It was horrible. He didnt want their pity. He wanted to get back on the ice, now. But he couldn't. He would never be able to skate again. In his life. It was over. Everything was over.

[solitaryhowl]

So you want to buy Wolvden?

I can already tell I’m going to ramble (I absolutely did oops) but bare with me, and I’ll try to make this as useful as possible. I’ve only recently rejoined the Wolvden hype and had a browse at social medias, tumblr posts, etc and thought I’d make my coming back from the dead post at least kind of helpful or just chip in a bit.

For context I was an alpha tester a few months back (account was reasonably removed because my part time job kicked into gear a bit and I simply didn’t have the time for it among other aspects of my life at the time) I won’t be disclosing any specific information about the game, or any ‘spoilers’ or reveal anything at all because that’s not my business for a game not out yet, and a lot has probably  changed since I last played it but here’s my 2 cents given what I experienced, in vague terms - as well as a cheeky little ‘worth a buy?’ from me at the bottom.

So something I’ve seen said a few times; Wolvden is hard /  to the point where it’s not fun. Wolvden is definitely harder than Lioden but I wouldn’t say the difficulty is at a ‘this isn’t enjoyable anymore’ level entirely, not to at all say those opinions aren’t valid because they absolutely are, and it was a pain in the neck sometimes with how the RNG processed certain things and how exploring was and pricing of different things, so my take is that Wolvden is probably not going to be a win for everyone who loved Lioden or all browser game players. It is more difficult and there are more factors to take into account, and it does take longer to make progress, but honestly that’s why I loved it and why I’m still excited. It really hones in on the complexities of living in the wild and all the things that could go wrong with a wolf pack, and it just has more depth and flavor.

It’s definitely a lot more specific in several regards and requires more attention to keep your pack fit, healthy and fed than Lioden so it will very likely require more maintenance than a casual Lioden pride, so if you like the idea of a game that’s more challenging, unpredictable at times, and encourages you to be more vigilant with your pack to get it going pretty well then Wolvden is the bees knees. Lioden is definitely more lax in most ways compared to this game, so know what you’re getting into beforehand whether you give money into it for EA.

The Developers were extremely understanding and helpful when it was brought to their attention if something was in fact too difficult, or unfair, and did make adjustments accordingly so the game was less punishing, but keeping it to a degree of difficulty that makes it interesting so I trust them to listen to the players and make a game that we love, but just know that yes Wolvden will 100% be ‘harder’ and sometimes more frustrating than Lioden or similar sims.

Not as much have I seen this, but some have stated that it’s simply not worth buying a game that’s broken or just isn’t functioning to a level where they should pay. I cant speak on this because I have no idea what the state of the game is now, but honestly I expect imperfection completely. We’re paying for Early Access, even standard opening for the very first time without EA for any game is going to yield bugs and kinks, and the Developers from what I experienced were amazingly attentive towards any bug reports that we sent in and listened to feedback on things that were going wrong, so if you’re not comfortable purchasing something that isn’t in mint-condition most likely then Moon Moon or official release is probably more suitable for you. Everyone deserves to have the experience they want, so if you’re unsure about buying a game that won’t be absolutely perfect then official release is only a few short weeks away so that might be a good path for you to take!

This is getting long so I’ll try to put a bow on it - Is it worth a buy? My personal answer is yes, but it will heavily depend on the experience YOU want as a player and what you want to get from a game. The difficulty is higher, it’s challenging, progress can be slow sometimes or require more work, and RNG will be more against you than ever and force you to work more to problem-solve for your pack mates. I personally love it that way, but you might not and that’s totally cool! I’m not sure how friendly this will be for progress for ‘casual’ players who only have an hour or so to give in, but that’s the same with any sim game from what I’ve experienced; they all require some dedication to a degree.

There’s more detail to the care and live of your wolves so it does make you sink a bit more time and consideration into it, and I expect the community to be quite vocal and hopefully nicer than Lioden’s and involved, and can only hope for the best outcome for this game and the players. My advice right now would be to not stress too much about getting a Full or Half Moon package if you can’t get one with the knowledge that Golden Cones will be discounted throughout EA, so even a Moon Moon or Crescent Moon package is great and then just additionally buying any extra cones you want for the price difference of the packages will work out too if you’re worried about not getting as good of a game experience. Most of the ‘decent’ ID’s will have been taken so if you’re fine settling with a random one then Crescent might be a good way to go!

If you actually read this random post then congratulations, we’ve probably crossed the 2 hours gap until the second wave of EA sales because I can’t say anything in less that 2,000 words ;) I hope this was at least a tiny bit constructive to someone and if for any reason someone wants to ask my empty brain a question feel free to send an ask through, have a great afternoon folks~

[captainshyguy]

not to be a little melancholic but i've been thinking a bit about all the people that have come and gone in my general social circle like. not just irl, but online too. the close friends, who eventually left, and the ones on the outskirts, but were always there. at least, for a time. the people you never quite talked to, but were in your bubble, in your life, if just for a bit. the people who will only be icon, words on a screen to me. the people who will forever be 14 in my memories, because its all i have of them 

its just...its weird yknow? not even getting into social circles from school, friends you grew apart from, friends of friends of friends in your class that you had an odd connection with

but online its like. i’ve been in a few online communities in my time. the penguins of madagscar community on fanpop, one for the same fandom on deviantart, the agents of shield one here, then the maze runner, then star wars, then mario, then star wars again...i’d say ‘and hollow knight now’ but lets be honest, i haven’t made....many friends or even mutuals through it solely X]

i guess my point is like. all of these communities were different people. and over time, whilst i’ve generally stayed put (until i was physically the last one left, and jumped ship, like fanpop) people just. they left yknow? maybe it took a couple of months, maybe a couple of years, but they did, and its such an almost...odd thing to experience

im not saying people cant leave, not at all but it just made me think how many people i’ve known, how many i’ve been friends with, how many existed in my orbit. how many i only have pieces of. and i guess...how many people’s orbits i was in. the person i was in the past lives on through each and every one of then, and i have no idea what stuck. what’s their ‘luke’ memory, their takeway. heck, some of them wouldn't even have it by that name. 

one thing im glad about in a way is like. from each of the communities that like. meant something to me, i managed to grab a few people almost. a few that also dug their heels in, a few that are still in my orbit, however close or far, but they’re there. they’re posting actively or somewhat actively and i know where to find them. and thats nice 

it just makes me wonder sometimes yknow?? how many people currently in my circle, currently in my orbit, will eventually leave one day? who will stop posting, who’s icon i simply will never see again.

i do hope, with all my heart, that all the ones that i fell out of touch with are doing well 

(im musing about specific people under the read more, WILL get long kjdfhnd) 

from my primary/secondary school i dont have anyone exactly. the closest i have is one guy i was pretty fond of but not like. romantically. i follow his youtube and whilst i dont really watch the videos seeing his face pop up every now and again is nice. but man i do think back on those secondary school friends. funnily enough by the end whilst i liked my “official” best friends i honestly ended up more fond of others. sarah, priya, shriya, zarah, zi yu, kyle. danny, introducing me to treasure planet, hiding away with him and his friends to watch films in forgotten rooms when it was near the end of the year, then liam, of course, man..its weird he was my best friend in the first few years when i moved there, then we got put in different classes so we just didnt see eahc other much. but that fondness was always, always there. god, and jake....i wonder if he thinks back fondly to the two of us pretending to be transformers. i wonder if im still jazz to him. god, and then sophia, just, not even hanging out but having our little ‘hot buttered toast’ song. i hope thats the memory she has of me. (i haven’t even listed everyone from this part, and i couldnt! it was a 7-8 year period of my life! right during my brain developmental stages!!)

its weird i was in love with ryan for nearly three years. a lot of those memories are soured knowing one of my friends spread it around school and everyone secretly knew, (and looking back i was way out of his league like, morally lol) but still. maybe once or twice a year i’ll dream about him, and for a brief moment, im there, sitting with him in geography as he shows me magic tricks, during that period i do genuinely think he liked me too (before it wore off for him lol) and im still in love. 

from college, man....ewan was like. i have a feeling he was leading me on since he had a girlfriend lmao, and was just flirting for fun bc he saw i was shy and was trying to get me to react, but it never felt like bullying yknow? i dont think he was actively trying to make fun of me. so i dont know, it was nice, it felt nice and it still kinda does. 

khairun.....im so glad i still have her. i’m still a little gay for her. i remember sitting with her on the bus, riding for hours as we were on the geology trip, and she would ramble about the game of thrones video game and she’d squint so happily and her eyes would sparkle. she talks about dark souls now and i only see her messages, but i can still feel her enthusiasm. or tanisha and fatima, my other geology friends, my maze runner friends. seeing the scorch trials with fatima in the cinema. joking about newt and thomas with tanisha. sitting around the table with my actual friend group, in the big lounge chair reading the tolkien dictonary, joking about the flash with bindiya. sleeping around maddie’s house and playing would you rather. 

heck, i didnt even touch on teachers!!! teachers i connected with so much on a genuine level!!! mrs chambers, mr hauge, mr wrght, miss lloyd, mr hutchinson, miss petra, mrs young! mrs mohammed, mr santa maria, mr longdon, miss langley, mrs maize, miss davies. i know with teachers, the kids must start to blur together at a point. but i just....i hope, at least. with those first two, they’ll remember me, just a bit. i keep having dreams where im in my old school, and i try to find them., i’ve found mr hague a few times. but until about a month ago, whenever i got to geography, miss chambers was never there. im glad i finally found her. 

then fanpop...lexii, having the same birthday as me, talking with kait and roleyplaying as penguin ocs in high stakes situations. dating dylan fkjdngjdh, rigging the club’s presidential election. its weird, i dont have a lot of memories from this time. just....just people? people posting their ocs, people drawing ech others ocs. kaitlyn, anya, kait, dylan, lexii, imaneasel, mya, peacebaby, madascargirl, kate, starslight, imogen, tressa, sammi, crystal, cc, syliva, jasmine, hikari, amber,  yellow, steff, lilly, blue, richard, monique, sharpey, hannah, icicle, ratking, cian i- god, there was so many of us. theres more, i can think of more names. there was so many

anya did what i did pretty much and went to deviantart then kinda dug her heels in and didnt leave, though i don think she’s more active on toyhouse. and yet, i still see her art there, so its nice. having her throughout the years has been nice, watching as both of our art improves. she’s always been a bit ahead of me. then cian i’ve been talknig with pretty much every day for about 6 months now, thats been nice 

and then here, man! the agents of shield fandom! man! i dont remember a lot of names honestly besides the ones who stayed, and sam. i hope sam’s okay. y’all who stayed, who are still mutuals, the hm....five of us i think? though the one ofy’all i was closest to isnt around as often X[ but still. im happy y’all are here 

some of y’all that have been around long enoguh will know i was best friends with kacie for a while. from....i think that was my brief stint in the dan and phil fandom. she. well. she’s okay, the last i heard of her. but my overtalking screwed that up i think. my last message from her, a few years later, was amicable at least. i still feel awful about that if i think on it too hard

i think i only picked up ronan from the maze runner, at least, that i talk to, yeah, right, there’s two others that are still about but i dont think we’ve ever held a convo X] 

and u current peeps! from mario, star wars and.....im not quite sure where for some of you! i love u all! especially y’all that have been around forever, just, liking each others posts every now and again., i dont know how many people you all follow, but i follow less than a 100. i might only be a blip on your radar, but i like seeing y’all, genuinely. thank you for being in my orbit. i hope i’m a comforting or at least. nice reliable presence in yours, for as long as we all stick around.  

[fairycosmos]

Hi C, I'm in a really dark place rn esp bc of quarantine, so I'm probably not gonna make it these next few months sadly, sorry to lay this on you, but I just wanted to say this before. I relate alot to you about many of the personal/emotional things you talk about in your asks and your blog brings me comfort when I decide to come on here. I'm shy so sometimes I reblog the stuff you reblog from the source haha. I hope you learn to feel truly happy and that you never get to my point. Love , V x

hey, this seriously breaks my heart to read 😞 i’m not stupid enough to believe that anything i say will be enough to absolve you of the weight you’re carrying. clearly you’re dealing with a lot of pain and mental exhaustion, maybe to an extent i cant even imagine. so i know words from a stranger aren’t any kind of solution. but i have to try any way because i care about what happens to you, and i want you to know that you’re not in this all on your own. maybe i could be a mediating presence. maybe all that matters is having some time to pause. to give yourself another perspective to consider so it’s not just your mind trying to convince you that it’s all so black and white. cause it’s not, i promise. you can be 100% certain, in this moment, that these next few months will be rough/ impossible to survive - and still make it through them anyway. a sense of impending doom is not always accurate, nor is any ‘helplessness’ you see in yourself. and when you have depression, most of the time those perceptions are wildly inaccurate. it’s coming from the same place as all of the other toxic thinking processes: the self hatred, the shame, the anxiety. it’s not a reliable or factually concrete basis to act on. look, everything i talk about in my asks, i believe whole heartedly to be true for you, too. i dont say these things lightly at all. especially when i bring up how mental illness distorts your reality and your ability to make an accurate judgement of your future, and even more so when i talk about all the different types of treatment that are out there and that really do work given the time and effort. even if they’re not immediately available to you right now, just simply surviving through each day will eventually get you to a point where you can begin confronting your issues and growing beyond them. just as people do with physical ailments, the same is possible for mental ones. you can cry, you can want to give up, you can be numb and hurt and not know what to do next. as long as you make it to the next moment. if you need a little help to be able to do that, then that’s fine. most people do. there are many hotlines still open, online communities offering support, mental health professionals working from home that you can contact. even if you have to force yourself to. if you’re already seeing someone, you can call them any time and let them know you’re struggling. then maybe you can set up a plan together, to enable you to manage the heavy thoughts/emotions when they flare up instead of being overwhelmed by them. if not, you could call a friend or loved one if that’s an option just so you have someone to vent to. i’m sure they’d rather you do that than hurt yourself. a lot of ppl are feeling the strain of this isolation, but that doesn’t mean we can’t stay connected in other ways. it doesn’t mean we’re beyond help. it’s okay, whatever you need, it’s okay. i know it seems like bull shit, and i know it doesn’t feel worth it right now. i completely understand, i’ve absolutely been there too. but i would hate to see you permanently harm yourself, or worse, over an episode (that has been significantly worsened by quarantine) that can be worked through. you cant trust your mind right now, or the urges you’re having. i dont want to give you all the cliches about how there’s so much waiting for you, about how suicide is an extreme solution to a temporary problem. i get that they’re annoying. but part of me does believe all of those old sayings, at least a little bit. you can recognize that you’re in a dark place right now, and that it’s being exacerbated by current circumstances, and thats a really good sign. it means some part of you know there’s more beyond that, that improvement is both possible and in some ways, inevitable. whatever ‘point’ you think you’re at, you’re not. you’re not a lost cause. you didn’t survive everything so far, for nothing. so please, please don’t get lost in the notion that killing yourself is a guaranteed act, because it’s not. it’s easy to believe that when you’re spiraling, but spirals always come to an end, through self awareness or natural progression or medical attention. listen, you’re here and you’re trying and that is quite literally the entire point. you’re worth so much, and so is your life. i couldn’t be more proud of you, and i want you to stick around so that someday you’ll see it for yourself. i’m really glad i was able to bring you some comfort. it makes me want to cry that you sent this and that you’re thinking of me. so know i’m thinking of you too. that so many people care for your presence even if you dont know it. please reconsider, please try to regroup and look at your options. if you want to talk, dont hesitate at all to message me. i know you said you’re shy, but so am i! and i can relate a lot to what you’re saying. i’ll be here. take it one day at a time love, and if that feels like too much, one hour at a time. even a minute at a time. the rest doesn’t exist yet. im sending you so much love, and my dms are always open. get some sleep, eat well, find something you enjoy that allows you to breathe, - a view from a window, a tv show, a memory, laying in bed. not a cure,  i know, just a small reason. and then for now, keep going. whatever that looks like for you. i believe in you so much x

[thestuckylibrary]

Group Ask 137

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Anon 1 said:

hey I’m looking for a fairly recent fic I think I don’t remember a lot of it but buck was abused by Pierce (and Rumlow I think) and he’s living w Steve now and they’re like pressing charges I think Carol Danvers is in there as a detective ring any bells ?

free-2bmee sent in tell me how to breathe in and feel no hurt* by Cafelesbian (WIP | 73,395 | M) *rape/noncon, sex work

Anon 2 said:

I found a fic through here but then lost it. Identity porn with Steve and Bucky. They are email buddies at work, and check each other out in the cafeteria, and hook up at an anonymous sex club, but don't know that they're all the same person?? Steve is a veteran if that helps? Thanks!

princessniitza and sergeantbucky-barnes sent in Time After Time* by elle1991 (complete | 124,026 | E) *graphic violence, major character death

Anon 3 said:

There is a fic I can’t find all I remember is it’s a high school au and Bucky lost his arm because he was beaten up by someone I don’t remember. And becka started her period and Bucky called Nat over to help. Bucky likes to throw knives at walls. Bucky never took off his prosthetic so it broke an tony had to fix it. Thanks if you know it!

Anon 4 said:

hey! i’ve been looking for this fic for weeks but i’ve had no look. i think they find bucky, but steve kinda goes hitman and natasha helps until she realises it’s not food for him and then sends him to live with bucky on a farm. i think i remember smashing a jar or something. thank you!

whitewolfbucky and orchidsrule sent in  The Ghosts Of Who I Used To Be by Brenda (complete | 107,289 | M)

Anon 5 said:

hey! i looked through all the tags i could think of and im sure i saw it in this blog but i cant find this fic where hydra covers the sun and everyone thinks they killed steve but he's actually posessed (?) by an alien creature and invades the white house???

bluetree76, free-2bmee and dolphinqueen10 sent in Such Great Siege* by eyres (complete | 41,446| M) *graphic violence

Anon 6 said:

Looking for a fic where Bucky tutors Steve and Steve realizes he really likes Bucky buts he’s worried about what his teammates think

Anon 7 said:

I’m looking for a fic where Steve and Bucky have a one night stand and end up accidentally breaking into someone’s apartment and it makes Steve mad so they don’t keep up and then sam and nat set them up on a fake date so they come up with a fake dating plan and Bucky is shocked by the assholes Steve has dated I’ve looked everywhere and I can’t find it

princessniitza and yetanotherobsessivereader sent in Keep Making Trouble ‘Till You Find What You Love by Rena (oneshot | 41,788 | M)

Anon 8 said:

I don't remember this one very well but... in this fanfic Bucky was a university/collage student (maybe he was studying law but I'm not 100% sure), he borrowed Steve's sunglasses and apparently looked cool in them, they had a discussion about favorite musicians (talked about Elton John, maybe the beatles).. yeah so I don't remember anything relevant from this story apart from those little details, so it won't surprise me if you couldn'tt be able to find it

free-2bmee sent in Sugar Sweet by ColorCoated (complete | 173,400 | E)

Anon 9 said:

Hi, I've been looking for a fic for the past month. In it, Bucky and Steve work in the same office. And Bucky lives far from the office so he has to commute every morning for more than an hour. At one point in the fic, the trains stop working because of the snow, so Steve invites Bucky to sleep at his place. I already looked through the office tag and I try to look through AO3 in a search bar with a combination of words including commute, snow in... I figured someone might remember the fic.

Anon 10 said:

I read a fic almost a year ago on ao3 that I’ve never been able to find again. 40s Steve listed Bucky as his spouse on his draft card and Bucky took it from him and made him change it. Bucky stuffed it in his uniform, and sometime after TWS, Pepper found his uniform and then found the draft card tucked away in it, and that’s how the Avengers all found out about Stucky. I appreciate your help, thank you!

Anon 10 said: (rape/noncon)

I'm looking for this fic where Steve is raped. I don't remember much, but I think he chooses to be abused to protect some people, children maybe. Not sure if it's HTP. And then he goes back home and Bucky realizes he's not okay, I think he hides in the bathroom or something. Thank you for whoever can help!

lindsey-of-north sent in You can have my everything by Builder (oneshot | 9,103 | M) - heed the tags!

Anon 11 said: (polyamory)

Hi- firstly thanks for all you guys do- the library is amazing. I've tried my best to hunt down a fic but had no joy- any chance you can help please? The gist of what I recall is, Bucky is hired as a live in support for Steve, given a big handbook on how to cook and clean+ he sleeps in a separate room initially. Peggy and Angie are a side pair, I think they come for breakfast. There's some Steve/ Nat/ Bucky also but Stucky is the main pairing. Hope that's enough to go on. Thank you massively!!

Anon 12 said:

Hello, I'm looking for an au fic where pre-serum Steve just moved into his new apartment and has to call Bucky to repair something. Bucky is the repairman if the building. At one point Steve makes up a story about rats and Bucky goes along with it, knowing that there aren't rats bc he has traps set up around the building. Steve's also an artist who just got a new job w/ a higher salary, therefore new apartment. Thank you!

time-lord-no-more sent in Apartment 409 by 74days (oneshot | 4,395 | T)

Anon 13 said:

hi, sorry this is so vague but im looking for a fic several weeks ago that’s a modern au where steve comes home from the military for a little bit and he and bucky have reunion sex and that’s literally all i remember but if you or anyone knows it that’d be great!

Anon 14 said: (polyamory)

Hi! I think there was a stuckony fic but i cant remember the title in which it was a srries in which Tony was mad that either Steve or Bucky at his cupcake and refused to give him kisses and the sequel was them (Bucky and Steve) getting revenge for it. But i cant find it.

itsagentromanoff sent in  Chocolate Cakes and Coffee Cups by imperialstark (oneshot | 1,647 | M)

Anon 15 said:

Trying to find this story. Steve is a girl married to Bucky goes through project rebirth gets changed into a guy

Anon sent in Change is Hard (and Harder, so much Harder) by Dogtagsandsmut  (complete | 18,409 | E)