#i ignore the various other red flags

[moonchildsfae]

but daddy, he supports public libraries !!

[moonstonejpg]

ours (k.bakugou x reader)

—“your hands are tough, but they are where mine belong in"

sum. bakugou is having a bad week, thankfully his girl is always there to make the bad days a little better cw: a little angst, fluffy ending

i hate hate hate paparazzi!! loosely based off of this and the song ours by taylor swift

It had been a rough week for Katsuki.

First, the hero rankings were announced, and he found himself at #15—not even in the top ten. And he swore it didn't bother him, that the rankings were just a stupid popularity contest. But you saw the way his shoulders slightly slumped in disappointment and the way his fists clenched so hard that the half-moon imprints of his nails in his skin stayed for hours after you had smoothed his fingers out.

It broke your heart to see him like that—and then yesterday he got into a silly fight with Izuku, one that was filmed and taken way out of context by thousands of people on the internet. Which in turn prompted the resurgence of people saying he didn't even deserve to be on the list at all, let alone at #15.

bakugou is mentally unstable lol

i worry about his gf tbh, those anger issues are a huuuge red flag

right?! i hope that poor girl gets out of that

she seems so sweet, he’s probably threatening her or something

It was just one hit after another for him.

And now, as he stares out the window at the crowd of paparazzi with a clenched jaw, the only thought in your mind is how this is strike three. All he wanted to do was take you out for a nice dinner to thank you for being so supportive this week, but he couldn't even do that without a swarm of media leeches waiting outside.

"Kats, we don't have to go. We can just stay here." You say quietly, worried eyes set on his tense shoulders.

"No," he growls, "I'm not letting them ruin this too." He positions himself in front of you before taking a few hesitant steps out the front door of your shared apartment building.

His warm hand envelopes your own, fingers threading through before tugging you behind him, half shielding you with his large body. The flash of the cameras and the noise of the crowd makes your vision blur, but Katsuki is moving fast, fingers tightly gripping your own while his gaze is laser focused on the awaiting black car parked on the other side of the street.

Everything is moving so fast, the shouts of the various reporters melting together around you. But you can't hear a word they say, the sound drowning out any specific words, until—

“Why him?”

And you nearly miss the step below as you freeze. The question has you rearing back as if you'd been hit, your eyes dancing towards the sound of the question. You see him right away, a male reporter who is nearly frothing at the mouth for a reaction. The reporter leans forward, eyeing you hungrily as he waits for an answer. And usually, you wouldn't give them any time of day, the daily harassment towards you and every other pro-hero and their significant other almost daily a good enough reason toignore any of their probing questions. But how could you ignore this?

“Why him?” you parrot back, white-hot anger burning through your body at a rapid rate. You don’t think twice before you’re ripping your wrist out of the blonde's hand and taking angry strides towards the reporter. You're nearly toe-to-toe with the man, and while he is a full head taller than you, he shrinks a bit from the look on your face.

Katsuki comes up beside you, gently tugging at your wrist.

“It’s not worth it.” He says lowly, looking down at you with something like sadness tinged in his eyes. And your heart cracks, picking up on the one thing he isn’t saying but you know he’s thinking.

That he’s not worth it.

And you can’t have that, you can't have Katsuki thinking that he isn’t worth any of this, because he is. He is worth everything, and despite being in each other’s lives for years now, the fact that he still doesn’t see that is devastating.  

Your body begins shaking from a mix of anger and adrenaline as you look at the crowd around you. A slow hush falls over the crowd, as if they are waiting with bated breath to see what you have to say.

“Because he is the kindest human I have ever had the pleasure of knowing; kinder than any of you will ever be. And what has he ever done to you to make you so obsessed with twisting every move he makes, every word he utters into something that makes him look like the bad guy? And for a quick buck? You all should be ashamed of yourselves.” After shooting a glare around the crowd, you keep your chin high as you grab a stunned Katsuki’s hand and drag him towards the car.

You gently push him in, keeping a hand smoothed over the back of your dress as you crawl in after him, slamming the door shut with more force than necessary.

The car ride to the restaurant is eerily quiet, and as the adrenaline begins to leak out of your body, your brain catches up to what you did. And yeah—they did need to be told off, but you start to wonder if this is something that will get him into trouble.

You weren’t a hero and you didn’t have a lick of media training, why did you think causing a scene would be a good idea? The thoughts spiral in, and you want to bury your face in your hands as dread slithers its way into your stomach.

When you get inside the building, you are ushered towards the back of the restaurant by the host, presumably to where your table is located. But before you round the corner, Katsuki is tugging you into a dimly lit closet, fingers making quick work of the lock. Even after the door is bolted shut, he stands and faces it, as you just watch the outline of the gentle rise and fall of his shoulders.

“Kats?” You say quietly, a hand hovering over his shoulder. “I’m sorry, I just—”

He shakes his head, a disbelieving laugh pushing its way out of his mouth.  

“No, you—” He shakes his head again, then turns around to face you, his body crowding you up against the wall. His eyes are dark, twinkling with emotions you can’t place. Both of his hands come up to gently cradle your face, and you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding.

“Have I ever told you that I love you?”

You blink up at him, confused.

“Not only was that the hottest thing I have ever seen, but—well, that was the first time anyone has stuck up for me before.”

“I would do it again—anything for you really. You’re worth it. And I know that’s hard for you to believe, but you are. They can say whatever they want, but I know in my heart that I do not deserve you, and that you ” You say quietly, eyes locked on his. He smiles, eyes shining, before leaning down to press a gentle kiss to your temple.

“Oh, my sweet girl.” He whispers in the dark of the room, thumbs caressing your cheeks.

“I love you Kats.”

“I love you too. Now, how about we ditch this place?” He asks, leaning back to tug at his tie, before bending forward to loop it around your neck. “I think that new ice cream parlor is open. So, sundaes on me?”

You nod, a giggle escaping when he bends down and tugs the ends of the tie, your body falling into him. He lets out a gentle laugh, the sound like a gentle breeze on a hot day. It has your smile stretching across your face, your heart singing in response.

He reaches down to unlock the door, but when he flicks the lock back, nothing happens. Katsuki tries again, but again, nothing happens. It doesn’t budge, not the second time he tries or the fifth, or even the tenth time he tries. On the eleventh try his hand slips from the lock, his eyes colliding with yours.

It’s silent for a few seconds, and then a laugh bursts out of him, followed by another and another. The sound has the grin staying locked in place on your face, relief flowing through you at the change in his mood.

“We—we’re stuck.” He gasps out, hands falling on his knees as he hunches over, deep laughs spilling out of him. It isn’t long before you are on the floor next to him, trying to catch your breath around your own laughter.

[cairoblair]

LADS men and their red flags

(a/n: this is my opinion of the LADS men’s red flags in a relationship based on my understanding of their characters and their dynamics with MC)

Rafayel

Manipulation

I think Rafayel would have a tendency to guilt-trip through passive aggressive comments. When he’s upset, you might get the cold shoulder, but more often than not he’s making a snide comment about the situation or about something you said. He’ll do this until you finally make up, and he’ll apologize for his actions, but that won’t stop him from doing it again.

Xavier

Jealousy

Xavier simply can’t stand seeing you around other men. It doesn’t matter if they’re being completely platonic with you, it grinds his gears. He won’t necessarily start a fight over it - he tends to avoid conflict - but you’ll know. He’ll shoot the man a hard glare or pull you closer, or even blatantly interrupt your conversation to drag you away. He can’t stand the thought of any other man getting your attention. He’ll try to make it up to you when you get upset about it, but don’t expect him to change.

Zayne

Lack of Affection

Zayne is not very outwardly emotional, so getting affection from him can be difficult when it’s not just the two of you. In private, he has no problem with you being all over him. But, in public, especially around his colleagues, he almost seems like he’s ignoring you. He might leave his hand on your waist or leave his fingers intertwined with yours, but other than that, his attention seems to be anywhere but you. He’s trying though - he’s not used to being openly affectionate. (thanks astra.)

Sylus

Lack of Communication

Usually, Sylus can’t go very long without seeing you, or at least talking to you. But, when he has a business deal or a meeting to deal with, you may not hear from him for days on end. It’s complete radio silence - no calls, no texts, and not even a response to the various ways you’ve tried to reach him. He’ll suddenly pop back up with no explanation at all, as if nothing ever happened. He’s not secretive about his work necessarily, but the last thing he wants is you getting involved. In his mind, it’s better to keep you in the dark. He’ll be sure to spend plenty of time with you when he gets back, but you’ll never really know when he’s going to disappear again.

Caleb

Controlling

He can’t help it. It comes from a place of love, it really does, but he has a hand in every part of your life. He’s always tracking your location, monitoring who you’re spending time with or talking to, or behaving like a helicopter parent with a troublesome kid. Sometimes, he’ll change your schedule or delete something from your phone without your permission or knowledge, but in his mind, he’s only trying to protect you. Even when he’s away for work, he’s somehow able to be present in every aspect of your life. He knows you’re capable of taking care of yourself, but why would he let you when he can easily do it for you?

[resande]

SCAM ALERT

all arists watch out.

Ok so “storytime”😂

I got a commission on tumblr of two portraits. With selfies n all. It seemed pretty normal. Then they sent me 200$ through paypal in advance, ignoring the price, which was cheaper than this, because they “wanted to show me appreciation for my art in general And to make sure i do a good job with the portraits. (I had this happen before, with a smaller amount of money than this and it was legit, that commissioner was a total sweetheart). So because of this, i didn’t see it as a red flag.

Then i received an email from “paypal” Which again, seemed legit (until later on i looked at some subtle details, and realised it’s not the real thing).

Told me my account needed to become a business account and some long bullshit and short story short they told me to send the customer the money back from my own sources, and send the receipt back to paypal, so they can let the pending go and for security reasons and idk what else bullshit they sold in that thing. Or else, legal actions that will lead to arrest will take place if not done immediately.

I was talking the entire time with the customer and sent the money (that i made from previous commissions) to them and all said and done.

Then another email from paypal which wrote that the company took 500$ from the commissioner’s bank account and hold the summ in pending,

next to the other 200$ summ, again “on my account.”

Told my peers abt this and they opened my eyes cause that was a full on scam.

The thing is, the commissioner acted as panicked as me and it was easy to not see it from an objective point of view, since i was under pressure for hours on end. Also not eating anything today and panicking isn’t a great combo.

Told them i reported the emails to paypal and they blocked me on tumblr.

After that, searching the @ on tumblr, i see other two artists that were scammed at the same time

As me and posted their @ publicly and also other various scammers, which i’ll attach below.

So yeah i feel pretty fucking ginormously stupid right now and if i’ll look back on this the next week, i’ll laugh my ass off but right now? It was pretty much psychological torture for more than 5 hours on a broke ass student lol. And i was always the one to tell my people to take care of these kinds of situations because they get trickier and trickier by the day. Plus that was my first full on scam ever so i had nothing to compare it to.

So. Yeah. Take care and take a step back everytime so you can see it from other perspective or just talk with someone you trust immediately. I’m not really well right now mentally but i’ll get around.

Down below i’ll attach screenshots of the @ of the scammers.

Oh yeah and the commissioner also sent me screenshots with sending money to paypal too so it seemed pretty real too. That added to the whole thing.

[goodlucktai]

WAIT WAIT WAIT ok im sorry you can ignore this ask and the other ask too BUT I've been on a baby casey & f!leo fatherson kick brainrot lately and I just think prompt 27 would be heatbreaking and wonderful all at once, ok but fr love you big fan 💕🫂

dialogue prompts

27. “Breathe... breathe. Look at the stars, kid.”

it's @soldrawss birthday and i JUST found out because apparently i am a huge joke to her /j

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SOL i hope your day was lovely and that you enjoy this small offering

x

They’re barely home for an hour when Casey’s breath catches in his throat. 

It’s sudden enough that he chokes mid-word and starts to cough, his body trying to clear its airway except that there isn’t any blockage there to dislodge. When he finally manages to suck in a breath that fills his lungs halfway, it rattles in with an audible reedy wheeze. 

Maybe no one noticed, he thinks hysterically, and lifts his eyes to find his entire not-family staring at him from their various positions around the room. 

“You good?” Mikey says, wrapped hands already up like he was ready to make the save if Casey keeled over. 

“Fine,” he says, or tries to. It comes out sounding so hoarse that he might as well have just opened his mouth and croaked at him like a mutant bullfrog. 

Mikey’s brow furrows beneath his dirtied orange mask and he whips around to look to his big brothers for guidance, the way he never really grew out of doing, even after the end of the world. 

Leo is already moving, pushing himself upright off the cot that Raph just set him down on. He waves the instant chorus of “Leo, I swear to god”s away and limps over to where Casey had stationed himself by the handwash sink. He starts to limp over, anyway, and one of his legs folds beneath him immediately, and he would have eaten concrete if it weren’t for all the hands that shot out from all sides to catch him. 

There are still hands to catch him here. It’s nice. 

The tightness in Casey’s chest is unbearable now that he’s given it a second of attention. What he mistook for anxiety and adrenaline was maybe not entirely that, after all. He’s usually better about catching the warning signs—if he’d run the system update that’s been haunting the corner of his HUD for the last week like he should have done, the program designed specifically to monitor his asthma symptoms would have thrown up its own red flag by now. Multiple flags in multiple colors, even, impossible to ignore and more annoying by the second until Casey admitted defeat and took himself to the medbay. 

As long as the update is queued, taking up memory, there’s a ghost in the CPU. As long as there’s a ghost, his family still exists somewhere. They’re not gone, they came here with him. They’re alive and the world didn’t end and Casey can breathe. 

Later, he’ll feel really stupid about this. Later, he’ll hate the way he snatched up Leo’s hands the second they moved into his line of sight and clung to him like a scared little kid. 

But right now he is that scared little kid. 

“Hey, Space-Case,” not-sensei says with sensei’s crooked smile. He almost definitely has a broken cheekbone, and two black eyes, and he’s smiling like he doesn’t feel any of it. “Sounds like you’ve been holding out on us. Slow and steady, life’s not a race unless you make it one.” 

Casey knows what it sounds like when Leo is worried, can hear the upset under the polished glass surface of calm. It shouldn't be comforting to know that, but it’s comforting to know him. He ekes in a breath, it scratches all the way down and it doesn’t feel like it makes a difference, but the success emboldens him to suck down another. 

“You were breathy on the ride home, I thought it must have been from all the smoke,” Leo goes on. “But I guess that was a trigger. Do you have an inhaler?”

“Y–” Casey starts to say, and coughs again, and Leo’s fingers tighten around his before he can panic. “Belt,” he gasps. 

“Okay, that’s enough from you,” Leo says a little shortly. Which isn’t very fair, Casey was just answering his question. Then he realizes Leo’s clipped tone is probably because Casey’s dizziness is overpowering his ability to stand upright.

“Going down,” Leo says to someone else, and instantly, Casey’s controlled fall is arrested halfway to the floor. 

The last time Uncle Rapha held him, he was much smaller and Raph was much bigger, but somehow it feels the same. He leans back in Raph’s lap, the solid plastron behind him bracing him upright, and clumsily tries to help Leo paw through the pouches on his belt. The third time Leo bats Casey’s hands away, Raph reaches around and holds them still. 

“Let’s let the boss work,” Raph rumbles softly. It’s a miracle that he has any softness to spare for Casey, of all people, who closed the door and left his brother behind it. Left his brother in the dark where the monsters live. “We’re still breathing, right, big man?”

“R—Right,” Casey says, but it’s barely got enough air behind it to count. 

“No inhaler,” Leo announces, already turning to address someone else in the room. “Donnie, metal cabinet by the door, third drawer down, should be one in there.” Turning back, he leans in and pins Casey to the spot with a look. “Keep breathing, Case,” he says. “That’s your only job. Don’t slack off now.”

“Why do we have one?” Mikey asks in a voice that shakes. Casey manages to split enough of his attention to regret scaring him. 

“Red used to have asthma when you were all just little turtles,” Splinter says quietly. “He outgrew it, but Blue always says—”

“It’s chronic, not curable,” Leo says in a falsely bright tone, the cadence of an ancient argument. He catches the box his twin throws over and wastes no time ripping it open and shaking the inhaler into his palm. Within seconds, it’s primed, and Leo is curling one hand behind Casey’s head and bringing the mouthpiece to his lips and ordering, “Deep breath.” 

He obeys, feeling the medicine go to work, and holds without exhaling for as long as he can. It’s not long, barely five seconds. Leo shakes the canister and has it ready for him again when he’s ready to suck in another desperate puff. 

“Okay,” Leo says, studying his face with back and forth flicks of bright gold eyes. “You’re okay, Casey. Breathe.” 

“Breathe… breathe,” sensei says, large fingers combing Casey’s hair back from his sweaty forehead. His hand is calloused from the hilt of his sword, rough with scars that didn’t heal well, and gentle. 

“Look at the stars, kid,” he adds, their family’s little joke. There hadn’t been a clear night since the war started, the skies overcast with smoke and ash and pollution from the Technodromes, but every single room Casey had ever lived in had glow-in-the-dark constellations on the ceiling. 

“Look at the stars,” sensei says. 

There aren’t any, Casey wants to cry, maybe would if he had the breath to. There aren’t any anymore. 

Instead he inhales and exhales, carefully, counting each second in his head. The tension seeps out of the room like water through a sieve. Splinter is talking about hot drinks, April is talking about calling her mom. Four bright lights stay sat, a constellation that Casey is somehow in the middle of. 

“I haven’t had an attack in years,” Raph murmurs. He’s rocking Casey very slowly and doesn’t seem to realize he’s doing it. “Since I was—six or seven, maybe. You kept one this whole time?”

“Correction, the medication expires, so he has consistently replaced one this whole time,” Donnie says, and sways disinterestedly with the force behind Leo’s disgruntled shove of his shoulder. 

“Oh,” Raph says. “But why?” he asks a moment later. 

“So I could say I told you so when you ended up needing it,” Leo replies disingenuously. 

Casey could say that sensei carried an inhaler in his kit every time he went into the field. Even after Uncle Raph died, he stayed in the habit. It saved Casey’s life once, the day they discovered he had asthma in the worst possible way. Sensei didn’t say I told you so to anyone. That was never the point.

“He loves you,” Casey says. “That’s why.”

For a moment, none of them speak. Then Mikey’s smile fills the room like stubborn sunshine finally breaking through rain clouds. Donnie says, “Intelligent beyond your years. I understand now why Future Me kept you around.” Leo seems to be considering the pros and cons of sinking into his shell and never coming out again, hunched small and embarrassed beside his big brother.

Casey can’t see Raph’s expression, but he can imagine what it looks like. He knows the feeling.

Casey was loved by Leo once, too.

[diejager]

psst! hi! are you willing to do a scenario where (civilian or soldier (your pick)) reader tries to run away and hide from yan!Ghost/konig

Failed Escape

Pairing: Yan!König x reader & Yan!Ghost x reader

Cw: smut, DUB-CON/NON-CON, spanking, fingering, kidnapping, training/mind break??, isolation, tell me if I missed any. Cw: 0.9k

König

Yan!König was meticulous in the location of your home, it was well-thought out and planned months prior to your taking. It’s a secluded cottage in the Austrian alps, between two imposingly beautiful mountains covered in green flora and cute wildflowers. A few fawns and deers would skip around your grounds, grazing on the fires and hydrated grass of your garden. It’s miles away from civilization, unpaved roads marking the way to the closest highway and other cottages within a mile or two.  

Yan!König who doesn’t bother to install extreme measures to your home because you’re housebroken, trained into loving you house and fearing to run. It doesn’t matter if you’re a normal civilian or a trained specialist, his sheer size made it impossible to run or defend against. But if you did try to run, ignoring all the blaring, red flags that bellowed in your mind about stepping outside the white-fenced walls, you’d wish you could outrun him. 

Yan!König’s ruthless in his punishment. If he caught you before you crossed the fence, he’d be more lenient with you. He would strip you down to your panties and lay you on his lap, hand striking your ass. He’d coo when you cried, his warm thumb rubbing soothing circles over your red cheeks, fingers dipping into your leaky cunt, his large digits hitting your spongy wall while you squirmed, his elbow digging into your back to hold you down. 

“Look at how wet you are, Maus, you like this don’t you? You like being spanked, ja?” 

If he caught you outside, your short legs failing to outrun him, König would be meaner, cruel even with his punishment. He has you tied and blindfolded in the cold and humid basement, bringing his gloved hand down on your naked slit. His slaps left your cunt slick and swollen, and you a crying and overwhelmed while he bullied his hard cock into you, fucking the anger and frustrations away. 

“It hurts, Maus? This is your punishment, take it!” 

Yan!König will have to spend additional time training you, utilising the wide arrange of tools in his well-equipped basement to help him train you. From different types of whips to metal and padded hand-cuffs, and from various sizes of dildos that fit the pre-programmed machine to a manual of torturous knots and binds to hold a person. König has all and everything to ensure that you’d be reeducated in ways of living and manners. 

Yan!König doesn’t do this because he enjoyed it - perhaps a lie with the sadistic glint in his eyes - he does it because he needed you to understand how much he cared about you, how much your life with him was a blessing and how much you could be happy with him. If only your training stuck.

Ghost

Yan!Ghost wouldn’t let you catch a glance of the world outside the four walls of your prison. He has locks drilled into the front and back door, some could be unlocked by a key and others by numbered and lettered combinations. He had every wind bolted shut with the occasional sliding windows for fresh air if you needed it, but they were all too small to squeeze through and too high for you to reach with anything but on the tips of your toes.

Yan!Ghost didn’t buy a house in some remote area of the British Isle, he found a rustic house in a calm and safe neighbourhood in Manchester, a pretty two-story home with a basement and newly-painted white fences around the house. Most neighbours were quiet and kept to themselves, it was another thing he made sure of before turning this place into a safehouse for both of you. He kept the house’s layout, but reworked the basement, building a third bedroom with a small kitchenette, a hotel-like living room and an even smaller bathroom fitting a single person at a time. 

Yan!Ghost who stopped you before you can reach the door, his bone-breaking hold on your wrist, wrenching you away from the hallway before throwing you onto the couch. He was fuming, face red with rage and narrowed eyes, his tall, imposing figure seemingly bigger and damning as he loomed over you with clenched fists. He might’ve been cruel and demeaning, possessive in an erratic and sporadic way, but he’d never lift a hand against you. Simon wouldn’t stoop as low as his father did to control his life. Granted, he used degradation and intimidation, but never physical violence.

“What ‘ave I told you, love?”

Yan!Ghost would force you back into the basement, imposing all the rules and regulations he had when he first took you, his words became the law and his hands the chains. He might let you have a few freedoms in your prison, but he would always be watching, either from the numerous cameras he installed in in the basement and around the house to keep and eye on you at all times, or from his seat beside you, an arm around your waist and his face buried under your head. 

Yan!Ghost suffered just as much as you were in these moments, having to subjugate both of you to this torture he played in the early days. Listening to you cry and bemoan your life before meeting him made his heart chip away while he shushed your pains, cradling you as he carded his fingers through your locks. Watching you flinch and stuttered when he approached you, his trembling hands inches from your shaking figure, red-rimmed eyes and puffy cheeks staring back at him while he tried coaxing you back into his hands to sooth your cries. It hurts how much you tried to escape his love and care, he was the perfect lover: gentle and patient.

“Why can’t you love me? Aren’t I enough?”

Taglist: @sae1kie @yeoldedumbslut @tallmanlover @distracteddragoness @vxnilla-hxrddrugs

[miguelhugger2099]

The Best Thing

Summary: Miguel O’Hara, star Quarter back of the Nueva York Spiders, lives lavishly with all he could want. What he didn’t want is a little girl popping up at his doorstep claiming to be his daughter. The Game Plan AU. Next>>> Football Player!Miguel x Ballet Teacher!Reader, Gabriella is Miguel’s daughter, No warnings Art: On the right: ethiobirds on tumblr! Left: rusticfurnace on twt A/N: First chapter! DC: for myself and for my fwiends on discord :3c

Star Quarterback of the Nueva York Spiders, Miguel O’Hara was proud of his ability and status. He had a loyal and passionate fanbase, women lining up for a date and money that could last lifetimes. It was hard work, but he enjoyed it nonetheless. To be in top shape, he started his mornings exactly the same. He woke up at 6:00 am, takes a shower at 6:05. Breakfast with his usual protein smoothie at 6:30 and then a quick morning workout until he headed to his next football game in the playoffs. On the field, his team destroys the other one, winning in a landslide. Miguel tries to make the final win by running across the field, passing his teammates and curving past the enemy team that has been tackled. The cold December air nips at him as he rushes across the green landscape, his chest burning since he’s pushing his body to its limits.He spots one of his friends in front of him, Peter B. Parker with his hands up, running towards the goalpost as well. Miguel ignores it, speeding up to make a touchdown all by himself and taking that win proudly. The crowd roars in cheers, fans jumping up and down and waving the red and blue Nueva York Spiders flag. Miguel smiles, eyes scanning the sea of people and he breathes in the air–all of it fueling his pride. He takes off his helmet, sweating running down the sides of his face, his hair sticking to his skin. He bathes in the adoration of thousands of people, the cheers of his name while his team walks away to the locker room and leaving Miguel be. After a few days, Miguel throws a New Year party. Models, his teammates and other friends of his attend his penthouse. Miguel meets with his new fling, a pretty black haired model. He stops her before she leaves, his hands helping her put on her fur coat. “I have to catch the last flight they have to Paris. The shoot started early and my agent isn’t one to be messed with, you know that.” She turns around to face Miguel, her hands resting on his chest. “I’ll miss you.” Miguel takes one of her hands off his chest to kiss her knuckles. “I don’t want you to miss me too much so I got a little something for you.” Dana gasps, her surprise evident. “Close your eyes.” Miguel whispers and she does as he says, smiling to herself. Meanwhile, Miguel takes a step into his walk-in closet, shelves filled to the brim with the same Chanel jewelry but different names labeled under each one. He mumbles her name to himself, searching through the alphabetical order of various different women’s names. He plucks hers off the shelf and returns back in front of Dana. “Open your eyes.” He whispers and lifts the bag up to her. Dana gasps again, grabbing it and lifting it closer to see the brand name. “Oh my God! Channel!” She squeals. Miguel’s smile tightens. “Or Chanel.” He corrects her. Dana lifts herself up to kiss him and Miguel returns it with his hand on her cheek. “I’ll see you, Mikey.” She brushes her lips over his before slipping from his arms and waving him off with her fingers. Miguel rests his hand on her lower back, teasingly running down to rest on her ass. “See you.” He says smoothly and opens the door for her, watching her leave down the hallway. The party continues without a hitch but just a bit before midnight, He sees Peter walking towards the door. “Woah, Parker. Where’re you going?” Miguel stops Peter before he exits his penthouse. Peter pauses and his shoulder sinks slightly before turning to face Miguel. “Is it past your bedtime?” Peter sighs again, knowing what other bullshit Miguel might say. “It’s New Year’s Eve. I wanna see my wife, kiss my kid.” Surprisingly, Miguel takes out his hand for a shake. “Alright. Thanks for coming. Happy New Year” Peter stares at his hand for a moment before taking it. “Happy New Year. See you at practice.” He says while the shake turns into a quick hug. Peter feels a hand shove itself into his coat pocket and Miguel takes out Peter’s wallet with a loud laugh. Peter rolls his eyes. “Mig, give it back. Seriously.”

Miguel opens the wallet, peeking through the credit cards and dollar bills. “I’m trying to find Peter’s man card but it looks like MJ already took it from him.” He laughs and slaps the leather wallet back in Peter’s hand. “Lighten up, Parker. Live a little.” Peter shoves it back in his coat pocket. “This isn’t living, Mig.” He frowns and leaves the penthouse, the air between the two friends being a little tense. His other teammates beside him laugh, muttering how it was funny and to not think about it, patting him on the back. Miguel turns to the celebration. “Who’s ready to party?!” Miguel shouts, the attendees cheering and clinking their champagne glasses, welcoming him back to the crowd. Far into the end of the night, Miguel shoves the rest of his friends out his door after the party had ended. Their protests fall on deaf ears as it finally turns quiet once the door shuts. He sighs and looks down at his bulldog Santos barking. He breaks into a smile. “Santos, I haven't seen you all night, papa.” Miguel rests on one knee to pet the sides of Santos’ head. “You want a treat?” He hums, grinning as the dog pants and barks once more. Miguel jumps towards the kitchen and grabs a football shaped cookie and pretends to duck and swerve around Santos like he would on the field. “Come on, Santos! Defenders are coming around!” Santos runs to the other side of the living room, barking as Miguel shouts out. “He throws!” The cookie is thrown and Santos jumps up, devouring it in three bites. “And touchdown! They’re going crazy!” He mimics the cheers of the crowd with a laugh but it slowly dies down as he realizes there’s no sound. No cheers and no one else in the room. Just him. He sits down on his couch with an exhausted sigh.

The next morning, he decides to rest before heading into practice later in the afternoon. Santos is beside him on the couch, Miguel aggressively patting his body. “Now for our favorite part of the day–the new special on Miguel O’Hara.” He smiles and scratches his legs on the coffee table in front of him, Santos grunting and resting his head on his front paws. Miguel clicks the remote control for his TV to turn on on the sports channel. It opens with high praise calling Miguel the king on the field and acknowledging his agility. Then, it moves to an interview–an exclusive–of Miguel’s passion for the game. He smiles through it all, admiring himself and the answer he gave. “Beyond that field, nothing else matters.” The host shrugs. “If nothing else matters, why does that championship ring elude O’Hara?” Taking a jab at the fact that the Nueva York Spiders somehow managed to slip up just before the championships. Miguel’s demeanor changes to annoyed, turning up the volume as the host continues to critique the man. “Some of the experts say, he’s too selfish when it comes to–” Miguel speeds up the broadcast, making the host sound high pitched and squeaky until he pauses. “Time is ticking, Mig. Ticking on your career.” Miguel shuts off the channel, throwing his remote to the other couch. “Blah, blah, blah! Whatever!” In the middle of whining to himself, he gets a call from the lobby. He rests his arm on the back of the couch. “What?” He grunts. The caller is one of the doormen, Larry. “Mr. O’Hara, I have a visitor here at the reception. A Gabriella Monroe here, sir.” Miguel racks his brain for a face to the name but he comes up short. “I don’t know any Gabriellas.” “It’s a young lady.” He says, almosting invitingly. This catches Miguel’s attention. “Is she cute?” “Oh, yeah. Very.” Miguel becomes excited, anticipating for another woman on his roster. “Well, don’t make her wait. Send her up.” Before Larry can respond, Miguel hangs up the phone. Back at the lobby, Larry chuckles to himself. After a few minutes, the doorbell rings. He hums to himself and swerves his way to the door and opens it. He brushes his hair back, his elbow leaning on the doorframe. “Hello.” He purrs. He looks left and right. No one is there. Thinking it’s some prank, he shrugs and lifts himself off the doorframe. “Goodbye.” He mutters, but as he shuts the door, a tiny and squeaky voice pitches in. “Hey!” Miguel finally looks down and he sees a little girl holding a doll and a pink tote bag–a pink suitcase behind her. She smiles up at him, her teeth a little crooked and her dark wavy hair resting a little over her shoulders–a pink headband at the top of her head.

Miguel’s smile drops to disgust, visibly disappointed. “I don’t want any girl scout cookies, kid.” He kneels down to her level and flexes his bicep. “I gotta stay healthy and strong. Indestructible. Just try and hit me.” The little girl's smile drops as well, her bushy eyebrows furrowing into one of confusion. Still, Miguel urges her on. “C’mon! Try.” Gabriella shrugs, balling up one of her hands into a fist and punching his chest. Miguel laughs, her attempt feeling like a tickle. He imitates her punch. “That’s cute. Real cute. Bye.” He chuckles and closes the door. He tries to walk away from it but the doorbell rings again. His playful act dies out and he storms back to open the door–the little girl staring up at him through her eyelashes, a frown on her face. “Look, I don’t know what you’re selling, kid but I have a hundred right here.” He pulls out two hundred dollars from his pocket and shows it to her but she shakes her head. “I don’t want any money.” She murmurs. “I want–” Miguel stuffs the money back in his pocket, seeming like he finally knows what’s up as he cuts her off. “I know, I know what you want.” She perks up. “An autograph from Miguel O’Hara! Everyone wants them–babies, ladies. You’ll sell it but I'll give it to you for free–just for you– because that’s just how I am. Generous, aren't I?” He chuckles. “Be right back.” He enters back inside but she scurries inside with him after seeing Santos inside. The small bulldog huffs as he sits a little away from the door. She drops her stuff to the floor and kneels down to pet him all over, Santos reciprocates her energy, shaking his body happily. “You have a bulldog! Hey, there baby!” She squeals, Santos licking her chin and neck to show his appreciation. Miguel hurries up to her, shaking his hands as he awkwardly tries to stop her. “Woah, woah, easy, niña. He might attack you, he’s vicious.” He mutters with irritation. She only giggles. “Yeah, with kisses.” Miguels drops his irritation, now bothered by the fact that this child is alone. “You can’t just run into a strangers’ home, kid. There’s weirdos in this world. Didn’t your mom ever teach you that?” The little girl gets up from the ground with her head down, a little ashamed. “Yeah…” She mumbles, looking up at him guilty.

“Where is she?” Miguel asks. “On an airplane.” “An airplane? Then who are you here with?” “My father.” She crosses her hands neatly in front of her. “Then get him because he’s probably running around looking for you. She shakes her head. “He’s not looking for me.” Miguel sighs. “How do you know that?” “Because, he’s looking at me.” Miguel squints in confusion, a soft mumbled ‘wha..?’ “Hi. We’ve never met before. You were married to my mom Tempest, Tempest Monroe?” She speaks meekly, unsure–maybe even a little afraid. “My name is Gabriella. Gabriella Monroe.” Gabriella approaches with a weary smile, her head trying to look up at him. Miguel slowly connects the dots. Connecting into something that makes his heart drop when she speaks next. “I’m your daughter.”

A/N: the first three chapters will follow exactly how the movie goes and from then i'll take bits and pieces from it so it can slide into a miguel x reader :) also,,,,, no fanart of miguel as a football player, sad. taglist <3: @maiyart @aphinthestars @byjessicalotufo @mochi73 @peachey-pie @beezusvreeland @scorpihoooe @having-a-time @slut4oscarissac23 @iamperson12280

[olailamajnoon]

The Gotham Zoo was being attacked by Condiment King and his sidekick Spice Girl, who sprayed ketchup and mustard, along with a secret mixture of hot sauce, onto unsuspecting people.

The air smelled overwhelmingly of a spicy tang that burned everyone’s nostrils. Civilians wandered around in various states of sticky horror, their clothes splattered with bright red and yellow. A disgruntled man waved his tie in the air like a white flag of surrender.

“This tie cost $300!” he shouted, his face as red as the condiment on his shirt.

“And this is a limited edition concert tee! You can’t buy these anymore!” another woman cried, fanning the shirt as though it might somehow un-mustard itself.

Nightwing walked and lounged beside Batman, his boots sticking faintly to the ketchup-coated pavement. “You know,” he said, “you’d think the Gotham Zoo would stop hosting ‘Free Hot Dog Day’ after last year’s pretzel riots.”

Batman’s mouth was set in a grim line. His eyes tracked Condiment King, who was being shoved into the back of a police car.

“HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF NOW, GOTHAM?” Condiment King bellowed. His triumphant scream echoed through the chaos as the officers shut the car door on him.

Nightwing crossed his arms and shook his head. “That guy’s really committed to his brand, huh?”

“Don’t encourage him with your jokes,” Batman muttered.

“Batman! Nightwing!” Spice Girl’s sultry voice cut through the commotion like a knife. She sauntered toward them, ignoring the two police officers flanking her. Her ketchup-streaked outfit—a mix of spicy reds and yellows—seemed designed to withstand condiment warfare.

“I just want you to know,” she purred, looking Batman up and down before sliding her gaze to Nightwing, “the thing with Condiment isn't the exclusive kind of thing.” She winked at them both, her lips curling into a suggestive smile. “I’m open to other arrangements.”

Nightwing gave her a Look. “Yeah, baby, you make me so hot!” he purred.

Batman was silently shaking.

Spice Girl tittered and tilted her head. “You too, Batty. Think about it. A life of spice...you can’t live on bland justice forever.”

Behind them was a loud snort. Catwoman was perched on the edge of a ruined hot dog cart, clutching her stomach as she doubled over, barely able to catch her breath.

Batman’s jaw tightened.

“You’re ketchup to my filet mignon,” Spice Girl called out behind her as the police dragged her away. “Batty! You and I could be...explosive together!”

“Explosive diarrhea, maybe,” said Nightwing.

Batman turned on his heel, cape swirling behind him, and stalked off. His face was covered by his cape, which was unusual, unless something unusual was happening on his face.

The sound of Condiment King yelling about “revolutionary relish” trailed off as the GCPD cruiser drove away.

[esotericpluto]

your life 5 years from now

from left to right; intuitively choose the pile you feel more connected to. To make it easier, you can take a deep breathe, close your eyes and ask for guidance to your deities or guides. These are all general messages, so just take what resonates and leave what doesn't. This reading is timeless. If it resonates, feedback is always appreciated and motivates to keep doing pick a card readings. You can donate here.

dividers credit: @animatedglittergraphics-n-more

pile 1

fully intuitive, no cards

I feel like you will have a lot of success in your life, mainly financially. You will be very financially stable and living out your dreams. I see most of you will be in your desired career and learning everyday more about it, advancing in it and adquiring new skills. I see some of you investing money in various ways too, as buying properties, jewels or art pieces. Others might be investing in actions/stocks as well and building a diverse portfolio.

For some people in this group (mainly those who will be 25 plus in 5 years) I'm seeing that you will be building a family too or preparing yourself to build one, however I do advise you to be very careful with the partner you pick as some of you might be investing in a rotten apple without realizing. Do not ignore red flags and be 100% sure this person is fulfilling you and doing more than the bare minimum, as you do not want to regret the person you build a family with. Some of you might even receive warnings of this through dreams, so dream journal and study dream analysis.

Overall, I see, especially for women who picked this pile, that you will be highly successful. I see you having very close friends who are there for you and who are successful themselves, so no jealousy or envy in the scene. I see you all going on trips and nice fancy dates together and truly uplifting each other up.

You will be extremely well educated by then and might even be beginning to take on a PHD by that time. I also see you taking some free courses here and there and truly building yourself up and becoming very well read. You will be a real catch and grow into yourself both physically and mentally. You will be very grounded in all aspects of yourself. I am also seeing some travels around the world and possibly owning a cat or two.

pile 2

2 of cups, 10 of swords, 4 of wands, 7 of pentacles

For those who picked this pile, you will be entering a harmonious time in your life after a long era of suffering and worrying. I see, however, that all this depends on you. You will have to remove your blindfolds and actually take control of your life and make a decision once and for all about yourself and the direction of things. This might be working on yourself, working on limiting beliefs, putting end to toxic behaviors and thoughts you have about yourself or others, going to therapy and doing shadow work. For some of you, this will require the end of friendships/a relationship that won't serve you anymore and you will have to put yourself first, choosing yourself over them, even if hurts you for a while.

For others, this might indicate you are going to be entering a new relationship after worries of never finding the ideal person for you. However, I see that you will be plagued by fears that the relationship won't work or that the person will leave eventually and that you'll have to start from zero with someone new all over again. This is a valid fear, but you will only be allowing these thoughts to drain you out of life and happiness if you don't address them. Not only that, but you will end up easily minsunderstanding your partner or jumping to conclusions that will only put a strain in the relationship. You have been hurt before and you didn't deserve that, but be careful to not project the aftermath of that pain onto innocent people.

I do feel like this partner could be the end game for you, but only if you are willing to truly work through these issues and I'd recommend starting now. When the time comes, be willing to be open with them about the things you have been through as they'll be open minded and understand you better than anyone has. Consider going to therapy too and even couple therapy with them if you have the chance. People tend to think couple therapy is only for when things are going through rough patch or to "fix" things, but the truth is that every couple can benefit from couple therapy and it can help them heal from expectations and fears they carry on from childhood or past connections.

Working through all this will require some time dedication and patience from both, but I see it strengthening the relationship and even possibly leading to marriage and a lot of happy moments together.

I also feel like you might be going through a lot of tiring moments when it comes to your career in 5 years. I feel like most of you will still be trying to find a career/workplace that fits you and where you feel welcome. Others might even not be enjoying your job/employers for being too strict, non-understanding and draining. While you should be collaborative, you should never take abuse or energy draining vampires. You are strong enough to leave and find a better job for you, there are enough of them out there for you and you might even find a better area or truly follow your childhood dreams.

Your efforts when it comes to work will definitely pay off after a while and you will even receive a financial bonus/reward due to this.

I see a lot of celebrations. I feel like some of your friends or even family members like cousins and siblings (i'm also seeing an younger aunt possibly) getting married, engaged or having children. You might also be going to parties or hanging out with friends, trying to maintain a healthy social life. I'm also hearing to keep family close.

pile 3

Lovers, Temperance, 6 of cups, 5 of cups, Knight of Cups, 6 of wands, 7 of pentacles, 3 of cups

So I feel like for most of you 5 years from now this will be a time of self-love and balance in your life. I also see that you will be surrounded by life, with a stable partner/relationship (possibly already marriage for some of you) and expecting a new family member/child, whilw trying to balance things out in your life and home to make space for the new family element.

Because of this new addition to your newly founded family, I feel like you will be reminiscing a lot about your own childhood and how things went with your parents. I feel like they committed many mistakes that you feel resentful over still and that you'll fear repeating. It could also apply to anyone who might have hurt you during your childhood and you fearing the same happening to your kid. However, you're going to choose to look at this as a new beginning and as a way to give someone else the childhood they deserve, since you didn't have yours. I feel like this will help you heal your inner child and release the unwarranted guilt you might feel.

I feel like around this time you might even receive texts from ex partners trying to reconnect, which you will of course decline since you'll be in a happy relationship expecting (although this could also apply for people adopting/using surrogacy btw). Some of you, old friends will reconnect and want to catch up with you. I'm hearing to be careful with who you let back in, but a few of them will be trustworthy and you'll miss them in your life. I feel like some of them might just try to get into your life again for their own benefit and to ask you for money, so be careful. This could also be a family member for some of you.

Overall, it will be a time that you'll see many things come to fruition and you will feel truly victorious. I see a lot of happy joyful moments and celebrations, especially when the little one gets in the picture. I think it will be a very united and bonded family which is adorable.

There will be one month or two that you might need to go into introspection/solitude until you feel better and ready to face the world too. I feel like for some of you this could sadly be some form of postpartum depression, but I see you getting counselling for it and overcoming it without many struggles.

You will be pausing your career for a bit with this, however once you do get back I see people welcoming you with open arms, missing you and wishing you the best. I see you will also be able to get promoted/salary raise in a few months after you get back and so will your significant other, bringing more abundance to you two especially after being a bit tight on finances to make space for the baby.

[backinotomehell]

Lot of Pretty Boys, Lot of Funny Business

Synopsis: Parties weren’t particularly your thing and neither were self proclaimed gentlemen… or were they?

Pairing: Clavis x GN!Reader (minor mention of Emma x Chevalier)

Warnings: swearing and suggestive themes

Word Count: 1.9k

Could mother not have made things easier? She could’ve just chosen someone for you to marry like all the other nobles in Rhodolite do but noooooo… She’s a modern woman who wants to drag you out of your clothing business to attend a match making tea party that is being hosted by one of her friends. ‘You deserve the right to pick your person!’ she had told you while ignoring any protest of you deserving the right to be single in peace.  

The tea party you had to admit was quite gorgeous, as if it was a painting burst into real life. Classic Rhodolite roses in various shades of pink and white were everywhere carefully decorating the large Willow trees in spirals and dried petals lay on the ground as if individually placed. Soft lighting provided by lanterns and the sun taking its time to sleep as it fights to stay up like it's trying to listen to the music provided by the pianist for a little longer. The scene may have been even better if it were not for all the people. 

Observing from the back you could tell there were a lot more people than usual, this had to be the influence of the recent engagement between Lady Emma and King Chevalier. A love as if it was straight out of a romance book. A commoner melting the heart of a cold prince and overcoming trials and tribulations for their happily ever after. It’s got everyone thinking they now have a shot at finding the one, especially with the other famously single princes including Prince Luke. If you have to hear another one of the princes’ names from your team though you may just fire them all (you would never do that, they’re too good and you need them they don’t need you).

“Hmm? Now why would such a lovely looking person be all by themselves in a romantic event?” A playful airy voice graces your ears, standing in front of you was a man with violet hair and golden eyes. His sharp features were focused on you playfully as if you were prey. Studying him and his clothing carefully you note the small leopard badge decorating the violet scarf.

If you have this correct from your teams inability to work sometimes, this would be Prince Clavis. Rumour in the store says that although he’s handsome and claims to be a gentleman, don’t fall for him unless you wish to be traumatised by one of his pranks.

And now he’s approached you. Perfect.

“Has my beauty left you speechless?” He tilted his head to the side and wow, they weren’t wrong about him being handsome.

“Oh! Ah no! Just wondering why someone would approach me, I’m sure there are others who would be interested in you. I’m only here for potential clients,” It’s bullshit and you knew it. But were you really gonna tell a prince of all things that your mother dragged you?

“Well consider me a potential client, I am Prince Clavis,” Client? Where’s the red flags? This man wants to spend money? And with the money potential you introduce yourself back. 

But wait a minute didn’t one of the brothers design and make the clothes for the royal family? Ah Shit.

“I do not think you would need my services, after all I’m a designer and I hear one of your brothers already takes care of that role for the royal family.” Expecting disappointment you instead note the look from playful to down right mischief in his eyes . “Yes, my baby brother Yves is very talented but alas he is not here tonight and a fine gentleman such as myself needs a partner in crime with a talented hand and 15 minutes. Nor would he condone the fun we will have together if you stay longer.”

Fifteen minutes of fun with the help of your talented hands? Is he asking what you think he’s asking? No matter how handsome someone is you wouldn’t give your body away like that!

“Fifteen minutes? I’m sure you'll finish in two!”

Despite the initial shock and remark from you, this doesn’t stop the third prince as he loops his arm into yours and quickly takes off with you away from the party and further into the woods, “Haha! Well that’ll still give me thirteen to focus on you! I’m sure you’ll be smiling by the end of tonight!”

Oh he’s a giver. Well I guess two minutes won’t be bad for the thirteen you receive in return.

~+~+~+~

Were you a pervert?

Did you need to get laid by the end of tonight like mother thought you at least needed?

Maybe leaving the store more and chatting to people and not clothing might need to become part of your new routine. Prince Clavis has you making alterations to his trap. He wasn’t lying when he said he was a potential client. Thoughts of being the madman run around in your head as you quickly set to work sewing a pearlescent coloured and very busty corset onto a cover for the manhole Prince Clavis is working on, giggling as he digs deep and concerningly deeper until you nearly couldn’t see him.

Where was this trauma your team talked about? On the walk over he explained his plan once you were out of earshot of everyone, when you got to the location he laid down his coat for you to sit on as he went to work so your clothes wouldn’t get dirty and his conversational skills were fun. He could keep up with you. No, he matched your energy perfectly.

“So Prince Clavis, what’s your thoughts on King Chevalier and Lady Emma? I must say my staff have been overjoyed with the news and to be honest, I’m getting a little tired of hearing it.”

“Haha! The castle staff have not stopped gushing about him either, I’m going to kill him!”  The next dig with his shovel sounded a little louder contradicting with his cheerful tone, "and please, call me Clavis."

Scratch that, he out matched your energy.

Finishing up the stitch and taking the moment look around to notice there’s a shoe here, a stocking over there and is that a pair of panties? It’s as if you’re trying to catch an actual pervert. Or as Prince Clavis -sorry- Clavis has told you, Prince Jin, the first born is who you're pranking. You can’t lie, maybe King Chevalier was the best pick out of all the brothers to rule the kingdom.

“Wow! Well look at your talented self! This is perfect! Not too obvious and not heavy enough it’ll drag the cover down,” being too lost in thought and taken by surprise, Prince Clavis crouched down and leaned in close to you to inspect your work. His body heat from shovelling warms up your cold body from sitting down and sewing.

Not because you got complimented by a pretty man and definitely not because of the gentle touch of his gloved hands on yours as he takes the cover from you and places it over the manhole. He uses rocks, dirt, leaves and whatever he could find to make the cover less suspicious.

You were in a trance as you watched him work his ways, as ridiculous as this whole situation was, it was cute and although it may not end like anyone thinks it would. It would be a fun story to tell at least once life went back to normal for you; and him back to his princely duties, or whatever this was. Spending time with him was fun though and it felt like years since you hadn’t thought about the business or responsibilities. In a matter of a short time, he brought out the playful side to you, hopefully when reality crashes back you can find someone just like him.

“Are you falling for me? Although I am a gentleman please be aware I am also a villain. Many have tried to capture my heart but they all ran away,”

“Ah yes, I’m sure they all really fell in love with you while you asked them to help create near death traps for your brothers,” they didn’t but lord knows you were. As you push yourself to stand, picking up his coat as well and dusting off what you can before passing it back to Clavis as you continue, “Unfortunately for you Clavis my job is done now though and alas I must run away as we-OAH! MMPH!”

In an action all too smoothly, Clavis had used his coat to pull you in and maneuver both your bodies to behind a tree close by . His body pressed against the back of yours trapping you between him and the tree, a gloved hand around your mouth and another pressed around your waist just above the hip.

A quiet “shh” behind your ear has you thinking maybe you’ll be the one to finish in two minutes. Taking his hand off your mouth and down to your jaw he guides your head to spot a tall figure in the distance. As much as you would like to care, the position Clavis has you in makes you prepared to be a parent.

“Our victim is here, just in time,” another whisper into your ear sent goosebumps along your arms. Trying to focus as you watch how Prince Jin shatters any resemblance of the prince role you had in your mind. Although it's dark now, cogs in his head can be seen turning as he first makes his way to the shoe, then the stocking, excitedly making his way to the pair of panties and shoving them into his pocket.

Wait what.

The first prince shoved a pair of panties… into his pocket? 

Clavis could feel your draw drop and made it his task to keep it closed, a gentleman wouldn’t want you to eat a fly afterall. 

You watched in near horror as Jin looked as if he was the luckiest man in the world as he spotted and started making his way to the corset. Time had started to slow down as he took that first step onto the cover.

His hands immediately flew into the air as he fell forward, his face dropping letting out a shout and tanned skin turning pure white, “CLAVIS! YOU HELLCAT!”

You were gone, as soon as Prince Jin took the first step into the trap you burst into a fit of hysterics. Clavis joined soon after, holding you close to him as you both felt pure bliss in partnered villainary.

Inside the trap Jin acted mad but in truth he just wanted to be a wingman to his younger brother and there was also a bottle of fancy wine with his name on it once he returned to the castle.

~+~+~+~

It had been a couple of months after the matchmaking tea party and although you started to go to more parties, much to your mothers joy and fathers dismay, you had not been able to run into Clavis again nor anyone like him. The same routine of work started to feel boring as you continued to steer the business into the right direction which should’ve been more exciting. Did you let the one get away? Work returned as your one true love and you stayed single to now your mothers dismay and fathers joy.

Well that’s until you receive a letter from the Kingdom of Lelouch. To both parents dismay.

~~~~ a/n: omg omg look ma i posted something! was honestly considering Jin or Nokto for this one it was honestly such a tough call phew.

[jeff-rees-jones]

Have a happy, healthy new year...

My older brother only made it to 38 and he would have been 65 now. None of us know how long we have left and most of us are waiting until the time is 'right' for us to do whatever it is we think we'll enjoy doing in the future, and then we're gone.

Over the years I've taken many courses, from various modes of counselling to all kinds of therapeutic work as both a student and a tutor and one thing I have discovered to be true is that each and every one of us has issues, some large, some small, we are all a little fucked-up in one way or another and more importantly, it's all about how we deal with those issues that will decide how we function in life.

Find someone to chat with, share your feelings, but after that you have to be prepared to make some changes, otherwise the same old behaviours will bring about the same old problems, and it isn't always other people, sometimes it's you.

Here are a few tried and tested small things that have helped me along the way, things you can do to improve your days and the quality of your life and your relationships, small steps but they work very quickly if you can stick with them.

So far I've failed at every single one of these more than once but hey, let's not make it all about me! This stuff works...

Happiness is a choice every single day.

You are perfectly free to be who you are and to love who you love.

Whatever age you reach, you will never feel grown up.

Learn to be alone and learn to love, or at least like who you are.

Try and feel gratitude for even the smallest stuff in your life.

Lower your expectations of people, no one can live up to your ideals.

Set your boundaries from the start in any kind of relationship.

Judge Love and friendship by what people do and not what they say.

Don't take shit from anyone, speak up and let them know how you feel, but do it kindly.

Try and choose being kind over being right.

Do not... Repeat: Do Not let anyone bully you.

No response is a response.

If they wanted to, they would.

Let them go.

Be good with your word.

Be consistent.

You don't need to be skinny to be attractive or to be loved.

ALWAYS keep secrets that a friend has shared in confidence, even if they turn out to be a *shit-bag.

*(Other words are available)

Never make someone a priority if they only think of you as an option.

Sometimes chocolate and wine can be the perfect food choice.

Don't ignore red flags in someone's behaviour, they're showing you who they are.

When someone shows you who they are...believe them, don't make excuses on their behalf.

The best predictor of future behaviour is past behaviour. (read that again)

Sometimes punching someone in the throat is an option.

Don't carry the past with you, it's too heavy and you're not going in that direction.

You are never too old and it's never too late.

Holding onto anger only hurts you.

You are already good enough.

You deserve love and respect.

Sometimes the kindest thing you can do is to include someone.

Everything changes, everything.

It eventually gets better.

Stay hopeful.

[sadceline]

THE ENHYPEN HOST || 5

|| Reverse harem || ft. TXT, Mingyu (Seventeen) & BTS

WARNINGS: foul language, explicit content, group sex, humiliation, sex in public, threesome, foursoome, rough sex, red flags, immoral acts, unprotected sex, morbid jealousy, comedy, parody, possessiveness, violent quarrels, arguments, betrayals, lies, femdom sometimes. GENRE: +18, reverse harem, comedy, enemy to lovers, friends to lovers

SUMMARY: You moved to Seoul to start over after a bad experience, and everything seems to be going well, you even manage to work for HYBE. You discover, however, that you owe them almost a billion won, money you don't have and don't know how to recover: but don't worry because Hybe itself offers you a solution.

Your body in exchange for paying off your debt.

Do you accept?

PREVIOUS CHAPTER:

READ THE FIRST CHAPTER:

"Don't you have a nutritional regimen?" I ask, looking around.

Jay crosses his arms over his chest before shaking his head. "We know how many calories to ingest."

"We make spaghetti! She's Italian, she'll be able to cook them well!" Sunoo proposes.

"I don't think we can eat pasta, and we went overboard on carbs yesterday." Puffs Jake worriedly.

"It's not that bad come on…" Sunghoon replies, peeking out from the hallway, perhaps he has just returned.

"What do you say?" Jay asks.

"I mean, we don't have any TV appareances this week, right?" Heeseung adds.

I get it, Sunghoon wants me to cook so he can make fun of me, right? Heeseung too I guess. I can already hear them saying, "she's not even good for cooking."

I wonder how he heard the argument if he wasn't even in the kitchen.

I don't try to hide my annoyance with him, blatantly ignoring him as I check in the various kitchen counters. I don't even give him a sidelong glance.

No matter how unconscionably handsome he is, he called me "prostitute", and I will not easily forget that. He is the only one who cannot save himself even with his pretty face.

"Let's just do it." Heeseung continues.

Sunoo nods, Jungwon laughs nervously. "Are you sure?"

"Let's start eating normally again tomorrow. - Jaeyun says, nodding in turn. - By the way, could you take care of the groceries from now on? Our manager said there won't be the people who took care of these works before, I guess because you are there."

No problem Jake, if you're the one to ask then.

"I'll make you a list." He tells me.

"What would you cook now?" Jungwon then asks.

Actually, there is not much to improvise an italian pasta in this kitchen, and if I have to choose from the most famous dishes on the peninsula, I have to rule out pesto - which I don't know how to make and the one from the korean supermarket isn't good; also my beloved tortellini, I don't think they exist here, so the choice falls to carbonara.

The ingredients are variable and the substitutions easy to find in Korea: for example, if there is no pork cheek I can use pancetta, and instead of pecorino romano you can use the far more consumed and common parmesan cheese.

"Do you even have pasta here?" I sigh, confused. The counters are full of korean stuff, rice, condiments.

Sunoo puts a finger between his lips as he thinks, I pause to look at how beautiful and elegant he looks in person. "Maybe? We had it."

"And where is it?"

"We cooked it the night Heeseung went crazy." Jungwon reminds to the others, visibly embarrassed.

Jake and Sunoo burst out laughing, in completely opposite ways, Sunghoon mumbles amused, Jay just smiles, Niki does not seem amused. New connection? No, to tell the truth, the others say a lot, too.

"Was he going crazy?"

"He gets … irritable sometimes." Jungwon explains.

"Sometimes when? I should know!"

Heeseung chuckles, seeming satisfied to have caught all eyes. "Anyway, should we go buy it?"

"Sure." Jake replies ironically.

"I don't mean everyone, of course."

They're talking about me, I know. "I'll get changed and go."

"Do you have your things in Jay's room?"

"Yes." Jonseong answers for me.

Jake, who actually already knew the answer, twists his lips. "You shouldn't go into other people's rooms during someone else's shift."

How cute, why does he say things like that? Careful Jake, you've awakened a long-hidden part of me.

"It doesn't change anything, does it?" I ask him in a tone a little too smug, to the point that everyone turns to me.

I die a moment realizing that I'm not really in the right situation for answers like that.

I live with seven guys now, let's not forget, whoever they are.

"Instead it changes!" He retorts very belatedly, Jake.

"Instead it doesn't change shit." Jay blurts out, annoyed by the skit.

Heeseung coughs. "So I was saying, let's go shopping?"

"Shut up, the grown-ups are talking." Jay replies.

The oldest of them all (Heeseung) is so surprised that he starts laughing, and actually so am I with him.

"She should keep things in all the rooms." Jaeyun proposes.

Jongseong rubs his forehead unnerved. "What's the point? It's a waste of time."

"I don't even have enough things to distribute them in five rooms." I add, honestly amused.

"You don't have five things?" Sunghoon asks, with a bully grin that erasing my smile.

"That's not the point!" He brings them back to order, Jay.

"Look then the next day she goes to someone else's room, what's the big deal if she does it for a second on your day?" Sunoo then asks, turning to an embarrassed Jake.

"It changes for me."

"Then keep things in Jake's room too, the others don't mind." He fixs everything, the good leader Jungwon, democratically.

"Fine for me." Jake nods.

"Of course is fine for you." Jay comments.

"So, I was saying, shall we go shopping?" Heeseung resumes the conversation.

"Go who?" Asks from the back of the kitchen, Niki, whose voice practically thunders.

"I can go alone."

"Of course you should, isn't because we don't want to accompany you - says Jungwon with ears adorably reddened - but because we would be recognized."

"I disguise myself well." Heeseung explains.

"You can't accompany her on my shift." Jake replies, again with this.

"I said I'm going alone." They ignore me.

"But why, are you jealous?" Heeseung asks him.

Oh no, here we go. What a fucking situation, thank you very much. It's not that I doesn't know, he asked that in a disgusted tone, as if it's something negative - it's also obvious why, and I… get hurt, again, way too much.

But why? What do I care, after all?

It's just that in front of others, who treat me as a human being anyway, I feel ashamed. I feel very ashamed.

"No, I just don't like to share. I can disguise myself too."

Heeseung mumbles in disbelief. "They would recognize you in a second."

"You too!" Jake responds curtly.

"Yah, use honorifics when talking to someone older!"

"The question is - Sunghoon interrupts them - why all this?"

"This is escalating. Go alone." Jay practically commands me, I nod and flit into his room.

With the door closed behind me I feel anxiety pressing in my chest, but what's going on in there? And is Jake sincere? I mean, really? Why is he so possessive? And anyway, isn't this somehow insulting to me? We don't even know each other, in fact it's like I'm an object he wants to appropriate.

The strange thing is that, it is a time service.

I don't like this situation, I don't like these feelings.

But still - as Sunghoon said, why? He can be an asshole Heeseung too, but he wanted to accompany me too, right? I stop mulling it over as I get dressed, rejoin them who have scattered and turn to Jay.

"Keys, please."

"Go with Sunghoon."

"What?" No way, and why is he telling me this?

"He can't stand you, and he's a stubborn guy. Make friends."

"Are you asking me to seduce him?" I improvise comically.

He looks at me ruefully. "No, to make friends. That guy hangs out with Wonyoung, I really don't think he's going to give in - he crosses his arms over his chest, looks thoughtful - but Jake? What have you done with him? Has he asked you to fuck?"

Is he giving me the third degree? What about Heeseung anyway? Why is he interested in me? If he doesn't mention it means he's certainly playing with me, bullying me like Sunghoon, but in a funny way sometimes.

"Jake is peculiar, huh?" I ask amused.

Jay is not in the same mood. "You find? Anyway, don't do it if you don't want to, you did it yesterday. It wouldn't be a problem if you refused."

"I don't think he has those intentions." I say that but I don't know if I mean it.

It seems unlikely to me anyway that he wants to do it right away, maybe he wants a friend to worship him, and in return, he'll give her a chance to sleep with him sometimes? Why is this idea so specific?

This scenario is not bad…

"Okay, that's better."

"But why with Sunghoon? I can go alone, it's not far. It's not even that late."

"Does it bother you that much? Sunghoon, I mean."

"Exactly."

"Make friends with him, in my opinion you have the ability. Show that you are not interested in him, he will trust you in time."

Me? The ability to be friends with Sunghoon? But then why do I have to be one even if I don't like him? He doesn't like me either.

"He called me prostitute."

"He didn't know you yet, though."

But why is Jay's tone so authoritative? It makes my knees shake and not only. I look at him in silence, then lower my gaze like a child who has been scolded.

"If he hurts you or hurts you, I'll take care of it. But try, at least."

"Okay, but Heeseung could still come." I say, and I know I shouldn't, but I'm still curious.

"And why him?"

"He was the one who proposed."

"And you shouldn't care, right? We decide who does what, that's fine, don't make unnecessary problems for yourself."

How cold he became, all of a sudden. Did I make him angry? Why don't I feel guilty?

Okay, I will remain curious. I apologize.

He gives me the keys and a reassuring look, and as I reach the door I find myself slamming my shoulder against Sunghoon's arm. I stagger, but I don't fall. He doesn't even apologize, just glares at me and adjusts the black t-shirt he is wearing.

He is not happy with this choice either; I get the impression that it was some kind of punishment. Not that it's all that much better for me.

However, I can't help noticing how he has changed, that he now wears a tight black t-shirt, a black cap, and a raised mask almost over his eyes. He is handsome, darned if he is, even though only his eyes are visible.

They make so much of his broad shoulders, his height, his simple presence.

"Come on." He says, rudely opening the door for me.

I walk past him with my head held high, who cares.

Let him complain all he wants, I just have to buy the ingredients - still, I can't help but wonder why he gave in to their will, or why they wanted to force him.

"Why didn't you stay home?" I ask him, as we wait for the elevator.

"They have to give you a credit card, so we're paying for now. No one trusts you to leave their card so someone should have come anyway."

"You could have made a transfer if it was necessary. But I have the money for this expense, I didn't need it anyway." I mumbles, entering first.

He snorts as well, looking annoyed. "I don't care what you say, I'm here now, so stop complaining."

"I don't care what you say either, let's be clear." I reply.

When we reach the ground floor, exiting the building where the penthouse is located, I walk toward the nearest supermarket indicated by Mappe but he grabs me by the collar of the long-sleeved cotton t-shirt I'm wearing.

"Where are you going?"

"Let go of me, we have to go this way!" I protest, still being held by the shirt.

He mumbles in disbelief. "What? No, let's go with the car."

I'm not listening to him, I'm reminded of something I didn't ask Jay: why didn't Jake drive me, it being his shift?

Damn, I really don't want to go along with him, my body rejects the idea of getting along with him.

"Why didn't Jake come? It was his shift."

He doesn't leave me; in fact, he starts dragging me by the collar. "Because he's an idiot. The shift thing, absurd…" He shakes his head in disbelief.

"Yes, but leave me."

He doesn't listen to me, just keeps walking, and I'm forced to follow right behind him. "Really, you're not even that beautiful."

"Neither are you, actually."

I reply, but I don't think so at all. I have to lie, I have no weapons against him, practically.

"Bullshit." He sneers.

I snort, he still holds me back. "Seriously, if I had to choose in order who to fuck, you'd be the last."

"Aside from that, I'm sorry to disappoint you but I'll never sleep with you - he says, laughing heartily. - Secondly, if I wanted to sleep with you, I'd only need, to be generous, thirty seconds."

I laugh too, unsure though. "That's what you'd like."

"I don't like you enough to challenge you." He ends the conversation, having reached the parking lot.

He lets go of his grip on my shirt almost throwing me against the car, however, I realize that he was not violent at all in pushing me, on the contrary. I even notice his gaze become surprised when he notices me banging against the car, but I think he is worried about the latter.

"Then stay with the doubt." I reply, before getting into the car.

"Are you trying to use reverse psychology?"

"There are girls who do not desire you. They exist."

"Really? I don't see any."

They all have bigger egos than each other, it's obvious.

"What? Can't you tell when someone doesn't like you? Are you… kind of stupid?" I ask him, as he starts the car.

He chuckles coldly. "We don't have that confidence, stay in your safe zone."

"Then don't insult me. Don't make fun of me. If possible, don't even talk to me. You'll be crossing the line of bearability anyway." I reply, looking fixedly in front of me.

"If you hadn't wanted that, you wouldn't have come here."

"Then I should have asked you for the money for the lawyer, the trial, and the inevitable compensation."

"You should have worked something out with your parents, they would have been able to advise you." He says all calmly, while driving with a relaxed air.

"But what do you know?!" I ask loudly, very loudly.

But how? What's the matter with me? I shouldn't listen to him, annoying me is his goal, and I'm letting him win.

"We don't all have loving families to support us if we want to skate or become idols. - I continue, I'm really fed up with it. - You talk so much because you are rich, does it seem easy to procure a billion won?"

"But what do you know?" He asks, in a much, much colder tone of voice. I have never heard him so serious, I have chills.

"I don't know anything, that's why I don't talk out of turn!"

"You just did."

"You started it! I know you think I'm some kind of crazy person who wants to live the fan dream, but as true as that may be, it's not like I haven't looked for other solutions."

"And you don't care what we think of you in the end?"

"It's obvious, I think about it all the time. - I rant, looking at him. - But let's be honest, is the opinion of some singers I have a crush on more important, or a debt that can potentially lead me to criminal prosecution if I don't pay it back? If you have parents who love you, and protect you, surely you are more comfortable, but I don't have that fortune nor do I have the strength to take on a lawsuit that I will lose regardless."

Sunghoon does not move his gaze even once in my direction; on the contrary, he remains silent for a long time. My words hang in the air, no feedback, no reaction, I am genuinely hurt by him.

I wasn't hoping to touch his heart, but at least to reconcile the situation, explain my motives, show that I am not the opportunist he thinks I am.

However he doesn't care, evidently, he parks as if nothing happened in the parking lot of a large supermarket and then gets out of the car. I stay a few seconds inside, still shaken, even if he doesn't care I have to at least be the one to console myself, to tell me it's all right, or the tears will come out and Sunghoon will have won, again, like the kids that tormented me as a child.

I breathe deeply, swallow, and then get out of the car. I must endure, I must behave. To do so, I have decided that from now on I will ignore him, pretend he doesn't exist.

I just have to find the ingredients.

At this time of the afternoon, on an ordinary weekday , there are not many people. They're all at work, it makes sense, and that's good for Sunghoon, whose six feet is pretty conspicuous anyway, especially in South Korea, where ladies stare and chatter loudly when they see a tall guy.

"What do you need? What do you need to cook?"

I don't care what he says, I proceed toward the relevant departments, and although I see him keeping up with difficulty, I have no intention of backing down. This guy is a soulless monster, that's why his room looks like this.

"Why don't you answer me?"

I take a whole piece of smoked bacon, it's not exactly what I was looking for but it will still do. He watches, perhaps expecting some kind of answer, but I advance to the pasta section, where I desperately look for bucatini. Nothing of the sort, I settle for thick spaghetti.

"Oh, you're bothering me." He says, following me like a little dog.

Yes that's right Sunghoon, that's what you are, a dog.

"Do you feel excited because you're ignoring Sunghoon from Enhypen?" He asks amusedly, whispering.

I just put a couple of bags of parmesan cheese in the basket. I don't care, I won't say anything. To me it's as if he doesn't exist, and it's only after a while that I realize I've taken it a little too personally - what else could I expect in this situation? For him to hug me and comfort me?

Of course, though, not even a word of support, not a blink, like a soulless robot. Just thinking about it makes me angry again.

"It needs.... what else does it need? - I ask myself, under my breath, looking at the basket. - Ah! The eggs!" I exclaim, in italian.

He looks at me strangely and annoyed, not knowing what I said, i'n too angry to rejoice.

"You know what? I don't even know why I'm trying to talk to you. I don't care." He blurts out, crossing his arms over his chest as he continues to follow and observe me.

I reach for the eggs, grab some black pepper, at this point I think I have everything. Will the pasta be enough? How much do seven guys eat? In Italy I would say not even two kg would be enough, but considering that these are koreans, idols to boot, maybe a kilo will be enough and more. I'm not that hungry either, to tell you the truth, someone closed my stomach.

I should ask Sunghoon but I won't.

However, I don't even have the number of the others. I have to ask Jay somehow.

I have an idea! I don't want to do it in front of Sunghoon, so I move around a bit taking advantage of a moment when he's distracted to check his phone, pulling out mine and going to the Enhypen's official account, it's the only desperate move I can make.

I write in direct, with my account: how much pasta?

I stay a few seconds waiting, they don't even display, I don't even know if they are running the account. I mean, probably not, however I thought they at least had access - but even so, who knows how many people write to them.

I put my hands in my hair, how annoying. Should I ask him? No, better to get more, at most it won't cook.

I completely lost track of Sunghoon, hopefully he'll leave on his own, I'll pay, I don't care. I can go back to the pasta department, I'll get another packet.

"Looks like you want to make a carbonara." Says a guy, behind me, in english.

I turn around and see him observing in my basket, I narrow my eyes, I think I've already figured out what kind he is, I've met several of them in Korea and they are quite common.

"Yeah - I nod, embarrassed and in a bit of a hurry. The guy in front of me is a nice enough guy, he keeps himself in shape, I can tell from his tight clothes and even though he's not too tall he still makes his figure. - I really have to go now."

"You speak english very well." He tells me quickly, preventing me from truncating the discussion.

I roll my eyes annoyed. "Thank you."

"And you can speak korean, too?"

"Yes."

"Where are you from? I've never seen a girl like you."

There it is, the classic foreign pickup line. There are some guys in South Korea who make it a philosophy of life to bed as many foreigners as possible.

"Look, I'd be in a bit of a hurry." I remind him cordially, taking a short bow.

"Can you at least give me your number? Or instagram?"

I don't physically have the time to think about dating from anyone right now, nor do I have any interest in becoming the next line on his list.

"I'm engaged." I nod.

"Come on, really? We can be friends anyway."

Insistent this guy, it's time to just go.

"No, thanks." I reply, turning around ready to go.

"Yah, how dare you? - He takes it personally, this idiot, grabbing me by the arm, speaking in korean. - Just because I was nice you can't ignore me like that."

If you knew how I'm ignoring Sunghoon from Enhypen you wouldn't be so offended.

"Look, this is not the day. Let go of me." I chill him, with a chilling look.

"I just wanted your fucking contact." He raises his voice, but how dare he? I move my arm forcefully.

Blatant, it's a just as I thought. Since I'm a foreigner, and I'm pretty, he has to convince me at all costs to meet him, it's not even a surprise - it's happened to me before, but I've always rejected overly rough approaches, like this one.

"Are you done fucking? I've been watching you for a while."

I turn around, Sunghoon has appeared behind me. I'm not impressed that he seems to want to defend me; on the contrary, I find it humiliating and don't want his help.

"Are you her boyfriend?" Blurts out the one, who is obviously unnerved by the taller boy's interruption.

"What? - He asks in a disgusted tone. - No."

"Then turn away, you idiot."

"What did you call me?" Sunghoon sneers, approaching the guy, who perceives the height difference much more judging by the way he looks at my roommate.

"I just want his contact."

I see Sunghoon's pupils roll; he's fed up. "And she doesn't want to give it to you, so you're the one who has to turn away, right?"

I know, I know. Sunghoon is an asshole, I know that right now he's only helping me so as not to cause trouble, also because if the guy went too far maybe he would have to intervene and it would be risky in his position, however…

The way he proudly keeps his hands in the pockets of his black pants, the threatening way he looks at this guy, his warm, deep voice, his confidence, it's a little too much for a poor, poor girl like me to handle.

"I'm leaving." I announce, waving goodbye to the stranger and resuming walking, this time toward the speakers.

Sunghoon follows me, the guy doesn't, I guess a little intimidated by him. "But what is it, does everyone like you?"

"I'm too pretty, in fact."

Shit, I forgot the vow of silence, the answer came from my mouth first than from my brain, I didn't have time to reason.

I hear him sneer. "You'd like that. You're talking to me now, huh? Why did I defend you? Are you that dumb?"

Ah, what a nuisance, what a nuisance. I had even avoided him, sowed, but that harassing guy wasted my time and Sunghoon caught up with me.

At the checkouts there is not much of a line, but as I try to get behind an elderly man waiting his turn, Sunghoon grabs me back by the collar of my shirt and makes me change direction.

"Let's go to the checkout machines, dumb."

"We're not close, stop talking to me like that." I reply, starting to pass products over the cash register.

"I'm paying for you, how can we not be close?"

"For that matter - I say - let me pay. When the card is ready I will use your money, or that of someone other than you."

"I'm not paying because I want to do you a favor - he replies, shifting with his hand mine that held the phone next to the pos, using his to pay. - I have to, so don't bother."

We exit the supermarket, look at each other for a split second, then he proceeds to the car. I, holding the bag, look around - I don't know Gangnam, so I don't know my way around, but there are bound to be means of getting back alone.

"What are you doing?" He asks, noticing that I haven't followed him.

"I'm going home alone, I don't want to go with you."

"Do you know how?"

I mumble annoyed. "Yes."

"It doesn't seem real. Anyway, we don't have to talk - he huffs, reaching over to take the grocery bag from my hands. - Besides, they'd bust my balls if I came back alone, I'd have to wait for you to come back with the means. Let's just go."

He says that, but I don't move.

He's not my friend, we don't even know each other, but then why am I so deeply offended? I should just put on a good face, pretend that I don't care, that he hasn't hurt me, but I just can't.

"Yah, are you listening to me?" He starts to get nervous.

"You called me prostitute, you kept teasing me, humiliating me in front of others, you criticized me not knowing me, not knowing anything about me. When I tried to explain how I felt, you didn't bat an eye, I don't want to spend a second with you."

"Would you rather be treated as an object? Like Jake and Jay do? I act the way I am, don't you realize that the only one who respects you is me?"

Huh? What…. say all of a sudden? And why does it hurt? No, they-they don't? They treat me like a human being, don't they? Or do they? And then - he, respect me? I don't think so, on the contrary I think he attacks me just for fun.

"I'm still at your service, no? In order for this period to end quickly and without any side effects, I just have to make sure that I don't make trouble, and that's what I'm going to do. Honestly, I too have feelings, I too am sensitive, I too get hurt-"

"Do you want me to apologize?" He interrupts me, serious.

I don't know what to say at the moment, then I tighten my lips angrily. "No, I have no use for your fake apology. I'm just asking you to treat me normally and I won't bother you, I'll strive to never be a problem for you."

"Did you feel so bad about the thing in the car? - He sighs, as if tired of my unnecessary trouble, as we get to his expensive car again. I don't know why, but I can't answer truthfully, he turns to me. - Is that so? Did you expect…"

"I didn't expect anything. I don't want anything from you."

"Then why are you so angry?"

I don't fucking know, Sunghoon!

"Let's stop talking about it, I don't care anymore."

He sneers again. "Do you want it to be okay between us?"

"What?" I ask, sitting back in the passenger seat as he rests the grocery bag between my ankles and I for a second, not breathing, he's honestly too close to my legs as he sorts things out.

"Then be good."

"Be good how?"

"Are there other ways to play nice in a situation like this?"

Huh? Are you asking me not to indulge or something? It still doesn't make sense, if we assume that I disgust him, however, it might make sense as far as the balance of the band is concerned.

I don't feel like a threat frankly, I just see males being males and therefore wanting to get laid.

"I really don't care that it's good between us." Is my answer.

As he drives off in the car, a warning light starts to go flashes, it sounds like the seat belt light but we both have it, so I see him looking at me confused. I move a millimeter to check that mine is attached properly, but surprise, this one being unfastened abruptly returns to its place, hitting me with the metal part on my face.

"Fuck!" I shout in italian, holding my sore nose.

He bursts out laughing, has a… he has a beautiful laugh. "You dumb, tie her up good."

"Don't call me dumb, I said!" I groan, still with bandaged nose, still sore.

"Did you hurt yourself?"

Huh?

Shit, I don't answer. I have like a thud in my heart.

"No, you can leave." I say, lacing it up properly.

"So you don't care if it goes well with us."

"If it goes well with you, it might go badly with everyone else - I say, not understanding why the pain doesn't go away, it's strong, it burns me so bad. - However, your CEO has been clear on the issue, it's not like I can just refuse."

"He is not our CEO." He explains, as he turns left.

I look at him, am i... sad?

Recently, Enhypen have, in fact, been integrated by Hybe, despite being Belift before, a sort of branch of the former. I have no idea how this was received by the boys, but judging from Sunghoon's reaction, he not exactly well.

"Why are you still holding your nose?" He asks me after a while, never returning to the old argument.

I don't want to admit that it still hurts, so I take my hand away and don't answer.

I see him, turning to me briefly and then looking back at the road. "You're bleeding."

"What?!" I practically scream, lowering the sunshade to check in the mirror: I have a line of blood about to reach my lips.

Meanwhile, Sunghoon has surprisingly pulled over. "Wait, don't touch." It's not advice so much as an order.

"Why did you pull over? It's nothing, he's passing by."

"You're dirtying my car." He reminds me.

Idiot! Idiot! Do you think he cares about you, someone like him?

As he opens the glove compartment in front of my legs, his uncovered arm grazes my thigh covered by too-thin pants evidently, as I perceive this contact as incredibly intense.

I shudder; I have to pull myself together.

He has a small purse inside, pulls out a pack of tissues and hands them to me. "Come on, clean yourself up and I'll go again." What an arrogant tone, as if he were the injured party.

I do as he tells me, use a handkerchief to wipe myself by looking in the mirror, when I finish I close the sunshade. "Okay, let's go."

I tell him, but he is still looking at me.

"More is coming out, maybe I should take you to the hospital?"

"What are you talking about?"

"What if you die in the car?"

"Then it gets dirty, right?"

"No, then I get arrested."

Man, I feel like laughing but I don't want to, with every fiber of my being I definitely don't want to laugh.

I see him take another handkerchief after taking the package out of my hands, roll it up creating a small tip. Then, suddenly, in a totally uncalculated way, he approaches me and, first wipes away my other blood, then uses the same handkerchief to close my nostril.

He has a delicate touch, actually. His focused eyes are quite beautiful. Her breathing, calm and regular, is easier to listen to at this distance, and it is really pleasant. The one not breathing evenly is me, having him so close.

I like the way he touches me, I like the way he dabs the blood gently.

"Are you sure it doesn't hurt?"

Well, to be honest, I don't feel anything now. The only burning is the one that's enveloping my whole body and it's his fault.

"Yes." I answer coldly.

He doesn't even look at me as he stows his purse, closes the dashboard, touching my thigh with his elbow again, and then gets back behind the wheel. "Okay, let's go."

Throughout the trip we don't talk about anything, we don't even call each other names - I don't know if I've been able to accomplish the quest Jay has given me, I haven't even tried really, though, it's definitely different in our relationship now.

Not necessarily for the better.

When we get back to the penthouse, Jake opens the door for us, in a second, as if anxiously waiting. He looks at me, I try to do the same but lower my gaze because I'm still a little uncomfortable with his disarming beauty.

"What did you do to her, you bastard!" Jaeyun asks, grabbing him by the shirt.

"Are you idiot?"

"What happened?" Jay asks, arriving slightly late at the door. Noticing the damage to my nose, he glares at Sunghoon.

"Really? - Rant the suspect. - I didn't do it."

"But what happened?"

"His car hates me." I reply, under my breath, passing them and entering with the grocery bag.

NEXT CHAPTER:

[maxdibert]

this is a very very random question and im a bit embarassed to ask this but i need advice from an older woman and who's prob had more relationship experience

there's this guy i know that keeps messaging me and spamming hearts and stuff like that and i think that if i argue or block him hell come to me personally to curse at me and tell me i'm a creepy-ass emo girl just bc i have dyed purple hair?? i just ignore him lmoa but we sometimes meet face to face and he pouts and asks me why i'm such mean when he. literally. not only has shitty music taste and boring hobbies but he thinks its alright to sit on 3 chairs in the bus with his legs so others cant?? wears the pants in that idiotic manner where you sometimes see a bit of underpants bc its cool?? he asks almost every alt person for a wrist check or dad reveal and thinks its funny? doesnt care about anything? is okay with showing his various vacation photos but never posted any of his girlfriends on his account? he PUSHED SOMEONE DOWN THE STAIRS (that happened years ago and the person is okay but STILL?? GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME) but i can't tell him that especially near a staircase

Girl, his tastes and hobbies don’t matter. What does matter is that this brat has a red flag on his face bigger than China and Russia combined. Stay as far away from him as possible. And if he tries to put you down for having purple-dyed hair, tell him at least you don’t need external validation to feel secure—unlike him, who probably doesn’t even know how to find a clitoris and that’s why he craves constant attention.

Trust me, stay at least 100 km away from guys like that. The only thing you’ll get from him is trauma, and the only thing you’ll achieve is spending money on therapy. I hate to be that person, but I’m always in favor of making sure dumbass guys don’t get chances they don’t deserve. Get yourself a chill, nice guy who won’t destroy your mental health. Word of a messy disaster like me.

[rain77art]

Introduction:

Hi, I’m Rain, (you can use any pronouns for me)

I’ve never really used tumblr before so idk if people introduce themselves on here or not- but I’m going to do so anyway. I created this just to post whatever, my interest, art, etc. mainly cause insta feels so dead? (Except my one friend, they’re my #1 fan fr <3) Feel free to talk or comment about anything I post just nothing rude obviously. Anyway here’s some of my art and interest…

(Cw: a bit of blood in my one art, I’ll try and do Cw for anything that may be slightly triggering just to accommodate for ppl, if there’s anything I don’t put a Cw but think I should, let me know)

1st photo is a human version of Gwen from Spiritfarer, 2nd Rin from The Poppy War series by R.F Kuang, 3rd me (I’m a trans demon), 4th is Satoru Gojo (kind of abstract art? Idk I never went to art school)

So now here’s a list of my interest…

Main: Various characters from various things I like to obsess over, think about, and analyse. Plants. Music (I’m more of a lyrics person, so I like to analyse that too) Tea. Moths.

Music: [Fav.] The Crane Wives, Mitski, Hozier, System of a Down, the Attack On Titan soundtrack [Likes] My Chemical Romance, Ghost, Rage Against The Machine, Slipknot, O. Children, Pinkshift, Depeche Mode, Linkin Park, Death, Anti-Flag, The Sisters of Mercy, Stiffed, Bad Religion, Pink Panthress, The Oh Hellos, Los Retros, Glass Animals (mostly HTBAHB album), Pierce The Veil, Florance + The Machine, The Fugees

Shows: [Anime]- Attack On Titan (Excluding the fourth season), Dungeon Meshi, Jujutsu Kaisen, Banana Fish, Nana, Full Metal Alchemist, Michiko & Hatchin [Other]- The Bear, Arcane <3, Bee and Puppycat, The Owl House

Movies: Everything Everywhere All At Once <3, Parasite, Wendell and Wild, Nimona, Spider-Man (Spider verse movies), How To Train Your Dragon (1+2), Birds of Prey, Ponyo, The Sea Beast, Kung Fu Panda (Only 1 and 2), Puss In Boots (1+2), The Guardians of Ga’Hoole, The Adams Family (1991)

Video-games: Red Dead Redemption 2, Spiritfarer, Bayonetta, The Last of Us, God of War, Legend of Zelda,

Books: The Poppy War (Trilogy) by R.F Kuang, The Jasmine Throne by Tasha Suri, The Wings of Fire by Tui. T Sutherland (My childhood books),

Characters: Levi Ackerman (I love him sm), Hange Zoë, Erwin Smith, Satoru Gojo, Yuji Itadori, Maki Zenin, Ash Lynx, Echo (Arcane) Fang Runin, Sydney Adamu, The whole main cast of Dungeon Meshi, but specifically Chilchuck.

———

Anyway feel free to chat with me if you’d like, I’ll be posting mainly my art but a bunch of random interest as well.

(Ignore any spelling errors, and in terms of commissions, I’ll figure that out soon but for now I’m not doing them, will post when that changes. If you want to use my art go ahead, just give credit please)

[l00na24]

I Got Your Six - Chapter 6

Warnings: PTSD (very brief appearance), Anxiety

Word Count: 11.5k

A/N: We're back :D This time with a huuge one thanks to me not being able to keep the intro as short as I wanted and just couldn't cut the entire thing for reasons... you will probably see why 😅

Enjoy reading! 😋

29 Minutes later, 7:01 PM, Brazil

After I don’t know how many miles because I eventually stopped counting, we finally reached the place we agreed to meet. It seemed an eternity away with how long the drive still was until we were there, not helping my thinning patience at all.

I couldn’t remember the last time when I was so on edge than right now and I hadn’t even met them yet. Every nerve in my body was literally on fire and my stress level past every limit already, like we were on a mission completely gone out of control. For those who knew me absolutely no good conditions for a confrontation like this, especially with my past. But I covered it with the masquerade I had improved to perfection, to hide my rapidly diminishing confidence and all my previous accumulated anger turning into an even faster rising anxiety with each passing second. I wouldn’t let anyone see my weakness.

When our vehicle came to a slow stop, I wished we would have had at least still hours to drive instead of being here. Not making an effort to move when the three boys exited, I drew in shorter breaths and flinched slightly when I heard the car doors closing. My head coming up with something I thought I had buried a long time ago only to surface in the worst possible moment.

Loud shouts, motor sounds, car doors opening and closing with a bang from the force, the movements of a car…

Shit. I couldn’t get a panic attack right now. I’d get through this, whatever it took. It’s just a job like any other.

Lying to yourself won’t help you.

It was far from it.

Willing my breathing to even out a bit and shaking my head to get rid of these unnecessities, I opened my door and got out after I had unbuckled my seatbelt. The men of our team were patiently leaning against one side and the hood of the car, giving me the needed time until I was ready to make the first step.

As soon as they heard me leaving the last temporary safe space I’d get for tonight and shutting my only opportunity to escape, their eyes shifted to me. Ignoring the discomfort it caused, I tried to act totally unfazed by the very situation I had tried to run from for all these past years because I knew I couldn’t face it.

The truth was: I was scared shitless. How they would react, how they would look at me, what they would say, if they would do anything at all…

With an unusual hesitation I forced my feet step for step forward, fighting with all the strength I had left against the impulse to run away yet again, but with the significant difference it was amplified at least ten times more now than before. An unmistakable red flag of my body I was about to cross a line I shouldn’t, under no circumstances.

You can’t always run away. No one will come to help you, this is alone YOUR own fault.

It was an open secret that my boys could see right through the false facade I had put up and the smallest movements I made, from the uneven rise and fall of my chest to my fingers starting to nervously twitch and shake.

🌿🌿🌿

Sensing the waging battle the girl of their group was fighting with herself internally when she followed soundless behind them, Alex wanted nothing more than to put her out of this agony she carried with her for far too long. Hating to see the various indicators written all over her and being forced to helplessly watch how it continued to destroy what was left of her, if there even was still something. He had enough about pretending that everything was ‘okay’ when they could see it clearly wasn’t. Not this time and not now in this absurd situation they had been thrown in.

Normally he was the person instilling fear on his enemies but right now he felt it creeping up his spine and every thought went in circles around the most important question: What if this broke her for good? If she wouldn’t recover from this?

There was no way in hell he would let that happen, Alex owed it to his best friend he had known since childhood to protect his girl and be there for her. Maybe he wasn’t doing it entirely for him if he was honest but a little for himself too… but this wasn’t important right now.

The top priority was to shield her from the possible damage these five people could cause. And he’d do everything in his power to make sure of it. He wouldn’t let anyone hurt her even more than she already had been.

“We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to…” Our group halted when Alex turned around to me, gaining the attention of his brothers beside him and mine. The care on honest display, unfortunately for him, hit a nerve because I couldn’t stand it in my current state, not able to accept it.

“You can’t protect me from everything!” I blew up at him with a hateful glare before he had fully ended, the pressure I was under mixed with my anxiety getting the best of me and announcing itself in an uncontrolled outburst. Immediately regretting my reaction, I cast my sight downwards to avoid the result edged on his face. I didn’t intend to strike right the point I knew would hurt him the most but it was my natural defense mechanism kicking in.

“Sorry.”

They shouldn’t care about me at all and they shouldn’t hold onto me so much like they did, trying with everything they had to keep me off the ledge I was continuously seeking. They deserved everything but me. If I wasn’t here, they would probably live a happy life and their best friend would be still alive. I never wanted to drag them down with me in this hellhole but fate obviously had a different opinion, wanting to punish them for not giving me up and yet none of the boys did even consider it in the slightest. How could they be so foolish?

Sometimes these three were too smart for their own good, the cracks in my defense visible to them as if a light would make me stand out to call out my false play.

It took not more than a short exchange of their sights to have the same thought.

“Come ‘ere.” Mick spoke up and beckoned me with a hand gesture over to him, spreading his arms to the sides in the process.

Not sure what he aimed to accomplish with this, I stood there a little baffled while I contemplated what I should do and trying to gauge his intentions behind it. I was in no mood for any kind of empathy.

“You really wanna leave me hanging here?” He asked when I still hadn’t made a move, pulling up his best sad look and tilted his head with raised eyebrows in hopes it would convince me. He knew exactly what he did. Little shit.

There was nothing I hated more than to see them sad or hurt, especially if it was because of me and if he had gambled on that, his plan was working.

Reject him. Don’t. Give. In.

Letting out a huff, I came to him and put my arms hesitantly around his body. Laying the right side of my face carefully on his chest, assuming he offered himself for a hug.

“See? Isn’t that bad, is it?” Putting one hand on the back of my head to stroke it slowly and the other respectfully on the side of my waist with the utmost care to not place it too far backwards to keep the lines in which I allowed them to touch me.

I couldn’t deny his simple gesture was actually relaxing my nerves a little bit.

“So… we all know I’m not good with this emotional stuff but…-” Mick began after a moment, only to be cut off by Luc.

“Horrible is more accurate.” He corrected him with a smile directed toward me, making a little wink at the end.

“I’m trying to cheer her up, dude! Can you not butt in?” The man currently holding me to his large body retorted in a fake offended tone before he continued, focusing back on me.

“Where was I? Ah! Right, as I was saying… regardless what they say or do, it will not change anything between the four of us. You have my word, okay? Forever and always. Like we promised, little wolf.”

At the mention of the nickname my gaze shot up in lightning speed till it met his, my face blank. I could feel him tensing up a bit, probably because he wasn’t sure how I would take what he said and if he was overstepping a forbidden boundary.

I hadn’t been called this term in literal ages, but it was engraved in my brain for eternity. The very name he had used to tease and mock me in the beginning or when he made fun of me or… to express his affection between the lines.

Mick felt my hold tighten slightly and took it as a good sign, also since I hadn’t pushed him away from me yet, which was very likely to happen at any given moment depending on what he would do. The odds for it happening were even increased given the situation, so he had to navigate his every move very carefully if he wanted to avoid this scenario and ruin everything.

“Remember what he used to say? ‘The strength of the wolf is the pack.’ And we’ve been one ever since you came to us. That’s exactly what we gonna show them. We are all standing behind you on this and won’t leave your side.” It wasn’t a common occurrence of somebody making me speechless but right now Mick had managed to do exactly that. I had forgotten how good with words he actually could be if he wanted, reminding me not to underestimate his diplomacy skills similar to Luc’s.

But what was a pack without its true leader?

The ‘goofball’ out of the four, as she had so fittingly named him after his best and also worst trait, couldn’t watch her struggle any longer. If he could take the smallest amount of weight off her she carried, he would do it without a second thought and give her some air to breathe to keep her from drowning.

He had made it his personal mission straight from the start, but even more so after the tragic loss they had suffered - especially her, to preserve and keep that spark inside they had seen in her. Even if it was through the faintest hint of a smile, real or not, all effort put in was worth it regardless. And whatever he or his brothers had to do to stoke those flames their former leader had ignited in her, they would be there to keep them alive, 100%. They would keep her alive.

That’s why he was the self-proclaimed backbone of the team, with his ever positive and lively personality but also blunt directness. Always a cheeky comment on his lips to lift the mood of the situation and his teammates. He was the unmatched motivator out of them, despite his comical and non-serious, or what some people called annoying, appearance. The lightness he carried with himself a huge benefit for everyone when they needed it, as well as his seemingly unlimited energy that had been equal with their captain’s, after their girl had enhanced it in Vic.

“You know, you could at least pretend I’m doing a good job here.” Mick whispered lowly to me, attempting to convey his message inconspicuously, so nobody would notice but being caught red handed the second he opened his mouth, not acting suspicious at all of course.

“Feel the fear, let it be your friend and it will guide you. Don’t be afraid of it.”

It didn’t take long till I couldn’t tolerate his hug any longer, retreating myself from his embrace without a word when he got the hint and reluctantly withdrew his arms to give me space. The second person close to me I disappointed in a matter of seconds. I could make a world record with this.

“You’re right. Let’s show them that no one fucks with us.” I said when I had brought some distance between us and walked past him down the way leading to the bar. Letting them know I was done talking.

🌿🌿🌿

Mick blinked a few times in her direction, not quite sure if it was the reaction he had been aiming for. He had believed he had done everything right, had been careful enough, well, maybe he shouldn’t have mentioned the last part, but how fast the situation had taken a complete turn and his well-meant support ricochet back left him dumbfounded. He should have been used to it by now since it wasn’t the first occasion this happened, but none of them probably would ever get used to her unpredictable, fast-switching duality from one moment to the other.

“You only wanted to help, she knows that. It’s not on you.” Luc followed his friends’ gaze to the back of their girl with concern in his narrowed eyes. His sneaking suspicion, he had hoped would prove itself wrong, turning out to be true more and more. There would be nothing they could do to prevent the inevitable if it was what he thought, from his knowledge all the signs she had shown pointed to it so far. Her more frequent, sudden mood changes out of the blue, the tension and nervousness in her body language, her touchiness in general, as well as most importantly, she shared way more physical contact with them than she would under normal circumstances. And this fact alone was more than worrying.

🌿🌿🌿

“Let it fulfill you.”

It had been the most terrifying lesson a certain person taught me, but it gave me the needed courage to fight back my anxiety as best as I could for now. To use it as a weapon instead of being used by my fear.

I hadn’t been on an endless amount of battlefields, ran too many times into hails of bullets, put my life on the line for enough people that weren’t even worth it, had made friends with death more times than I could count, ended lives without giving a shit about them and the amount of blood I had on my hands and hadn’t done unspeakable things, only to be brought to my knees now by the very men of my old team.

Nobody in the entire world would ever get me to break the one holy oath I’d die for before desecrating it: I wouldn’t kneel for anyone. Only my enemies will.

Entering the area of what I presumed was an outside bar, the first thing I did was carefully assessing the place. Spotting not much besides a lit-up area on the right looking like a combination of a bar and a market stall with two people sitting at the back of the bar and the barkeeper standing behind the counter. Regals full of various bottles lining the wall behind him just as a multitude of vegetables and fruits on display on the opposite side. Whoever would buy these things in the middle of literal nowhere.

To my left the actual bar, built on a wooden construct and a stairway on the right with some fairy lights hanging from the edge of the roof to give this shady appearing place a more trustworthy look. Its height and a fence made of thin planks of wood allowing to overlook the whole area from each table.

And then a car parked in between. The same car we had seen not too long ago.

Its sight alone making my stomach churn and heighten my senses to full alert. Not wanting to give it any more attention than I had, I kept moving forward while making sure to stay close to the bar to avoid getting noticed just yet from above.

As if on queue when I had crossed over half of the way, loud laugher from multiple people suddenly filled the air that instantly stopped me when I jerked away from the sound of the familiar voices and stripped me of every false confidence I had managed to gather up. Feeling the anxiety skyrocketing but also shifting into a mix of fierce anger and hatred directed at myself because I couldn’t even do the simplest thing. I was so pathetic.

“Is this all you got? Do you give up that easily?”

“Stop being so mean to her, Vic. Can’t you see she’s trying her best?”

“Trying is not enough, we’re not in kindergarten here. Do it better!”

My nails dug themselves into my palms at the memory.

Movement in my periphery snapped me back into the present, registering Luc, Alex and Mick who had walked past and blocked my way with their bodies. It was so unnatural to see them this tense, especially about the awaiting situation, both their posture and faces didn’t have the usual relaxedness I was used to and it stressed me out even more.

They were ready for battle and wanted to make sure I was too with this silent conversation between us before they would allow me to continue. My very last chance to back out of all this.

As always, the first nod came from Mick, shortly followed by Alex and then Luc, giving me their affirmation that they were only waiting for my “Go”. It was like they had known I had exactly needed this to give me the drive to move on and spur the wolf to get ready to pounce.

With the encouragement through my team, I took the time to take in a long, deep breath to gather myself before I gave them my confirmation with a firm nod of my head and sharing a last sight with each other for assurance about our next step.

Our engineer decided to take the lead as ‘the first line of defense’, Luc taking the second position after checking me up and down with his scrutinizing gaze before he left Alex with me who was waiting until I got going too before he went ahead last.

I couldn’t thank them enough for not forcing me into another verbal conversation and instead choosing the option that conveyed so much more than any word ever could and taking a bit of the pressure from me to have to express myself.

🌿🌿🌿

Just when we had reached the stairway, I came to a halt and looked upwards.

You finally get what you wanted…

Please be with me. I need you, I can’t do this without you.

Accepting I couldn’t delay the confrontation I had wanted to avoid ever since any longer, I forced myself to tear my sight away even if every fiber in my body resisted doing it. The emptiness I continuously felt came crashing down like a tidal wave above me without mercy, pushing me back under far out of anyone’s reach to the place I just couldn’t get out of no matter what I did. The very place I had never wanted to be in again after I was shown how it was to touch the sky on the other side. Until I got pulled back under and buried at the bottom with no life left to fight for.

Three sympathetic smiles were directed at me when I looked to the stairs in front, noticing a hand stretching out to me in the same moment. First I wanted to refuse Alex’ gesture but thinking for a second about it, what a bitch I was earlier and what it meant that he was still showing how much he cared about me when he offered to be the anker I could ground myself on – knowing what it took for me to even make this step – I didn’t have it in me to deny him.

Without much protest I reciprocated his gesture, feeling the warmth of his skin seep into mine and giving me some safety. The smile on his face stretched a tad wider when he had my physical assurance I wouldn’t shut him out again and let him help, returning it with his own and brushing a few times over my hand. We are here. You are not going through this alone.

“Don’t jump at each other’s throats.” With a quiet but steady voice I gave them my permission to engage, steeling myself and shoving all emotions in the dark corner where they belonged.

A quiet snort escaped Mick’s lips, conjuring a grin about the irony of my words. There were only two ways this was gonna go, either war or peace. There was no in between.

And knowing my boys, they wouldn’t even let them anywhere near me - not that I wanted it anyway.

I could only hope for the best and that they could control their temper because I would fight tooth and nail for those three and protect them with my life no matter who I was up against.

If any of my ex-mates dared to pick a fight with them, they had to survive the feared wolf first and then things would get ugly very fast – for them.

Let’s not get started if they found any of my triggers…

Before my thoughts could come up with every possible scenario, I chose to distract myself with something way more important, to check I had everything covered I didn’t want them to see while we were slowly ascending the stairs step by agonizing step. Making sure my braided ponytail was hiding most of the unmistakable, angry red scar on the right side of my throat before everyone’s eyes and my two necklaces were concealed under my black shirt. Going lower till the waistband of my jeans in the same color to find my gun and knife in the places where I had put them, ready to use in case anything should happen.

The grip on each other’s hand hardened when we reached the end and entered the bar, sharing a tight squeeze while we walked one after another in a row. All my senses automatically zeroed in on this very moment, making it almost impossible to keep up the mantra I was telling myself over and over.

I can do this. I can do this… I can… do this… I-

I stayed as close to Alex as I physically could to hide myself behind him in hopes it would give me more time until they realized who I was.

The paralyzing fear I had tried to fight in vain before came stabbing me in the back harder than ever and turned my body against me. Feeling like someone was squeezing my throat so tight I could barely breathe. Every step forward being at least a hundred backwards for my strength and self-confidence which had been so laboriously built up. My muscles moving on their own despite the weight manifesting on my feet.

“FIGHT! FIGHT BACK!!”

“Vic, it’s ENOUGH!”

“You’re so pathetically weak…”

Not daring to take a look from behind his back, I kept facing away from the scene to not cave in now and show everyone present how weak I indeed really was.

The atmosphere shifted as soon as we had stepped foot into the place, the one before a storm was about to break lose any minute with us in the epicenter. The hot and cold signals my body was sending me together with the humid climate didn’t do me a favor at all, the sweat clinging to me grossing me out and I wondered why Alex hadn’t let go yet and didn’t seem to care about the stickiness of my hand.

Was he regretting being here? Was he rethinking his choice of agreeing to this? Was he already hating me for dragging them into things they didn’t have to do anything at all with? Would they leave me as soon as we were done here to deal with my past alone? Were they only still with me because they thought they owed it to their dead friend?

What was I doing here? I should have never suggested this mission. What did I thought it would do? I should have ignored this god damn letter. I wasn’t supposed to even be here. Why couldn’t I just go back??

“Y/N?”

The moment my very name shot through the silence like a bullet, the chaotic whirlwind of thoughts was gone and I instantly froze into place. Not making any movement and praying I was mostly hidden for them, so they would hopefully ignore me thinking they had mistaken me.

But luck – fate – wasn’t on my side as always.

Of course they wouldn’t give me more time.

I couldn’t delay the inevitable any longer. It was over.

As slowly as I could I moved around, the hold on me tightening while I revealed myself and shared a fleeting glance with Alex who had his eyes already on me from over his shoulder.

I had to do this now. I wouldn’t cave.

I couldn’t run away anymore.

My pulse accelerated with every passing second and the only thing I wanted was to disappear, desperately clinging to my anker.

It was never meant to happen like this. In fact, it was never meant to happen at all if I could have helped it.

Forced to face the five men from my past after so many years spent to run from them, I hesitantly looked in their direction and deeply regretted it when five sets of eyes found mine. Bringing back up everything again, first and foremost the day I had left them.

Ben, Will, Santiago, Frankie and Tom were also brought back to the fateful events leading to the loss of the most important part of their team at the sight of the person they had never expected to see ever again before their very eyes…

🌿🌿🌿

8 years ago…

5:09 AM, Central America, Nicaragua

Moving uncomfortably around on the chair he was sitting in, Ben woke slowly from his sleep, stretching his limbs and blinking a few times with his eyes. It wasn’t definitely the best idea to try to sleep on the piece of furniture that was too small for his large body.

Noticing the room was still dark, he guessed it was still night, maybe close to early morning.

Trying not to be too loud and wake the other person in the room with him, he tried to shift into a more comfortable position and ease his muscles up he could feel hurting already from laying in this awkward position for probably a few hours.

Ben’s eyes automatically went straight ahead to the bed in front of him, checking if their girl was sleeping soundly under the covers he draped over her before he took the first shift of watching her. That in case something happened or she had a nightmare, one of them was there to help. Just in case. They would make sure they would be there this time.

Still mostly asleep and wanting to close his eyes and turn around again to get a bit more sleep, he listened for anything that would indicate a nightmare or that she wasn’t okay but the room was silent and he also couldn’t make out any violent movement on the bed through his half closed eyes. He was nearly off to sleep again as a thought hit him like a lightning strike.

The bed was empty.

His blue eyes shot open wide and his body followed, nearly tumbling to the floor in the process from jumping abruptly out of his seat in his sleeping but now wide awake state.

The dirty blonde’s gaze shot to the bathroom next, spotting the door wide open and no light shining. Looking back at the bed and trying to figure out if he was dreaming or not.

“Honey?” he asked in his rough and raspy morning voice, waiting for any form of response that never came.

Faster than light he ran over to the switch next to the door and flipped it on. The whole room illuminating and confirming his fear that felt like someone had just poured a bucket of ice water over him. There was no way she was gone.

Frantically he searched the room for anything that belonged to her, like her baggage she brought with her the first day but came up emptyhanded. Nothing. Not a single thing.

Ben had never felt anything like he was feeling now. First the whole thing hours ago and now this? It couldn’t get any more worse, right?

His heart was pounding hard against his chest as he ripped open the door, not caring about anything but her right now and bounding out to the one next to it.

“Guys! Open the fucking door! Wake up!” He screamed loudly, waking the whole hotel in the process.

His knocking only stopped when the door opened and his brother Will was standing before him, not knowing what happened to have Ben this wound up in the early morning hours but already on high alert.

“What the fuck, dude? What’s going on?” Blue eyes already searching each other.

“She’s fucking gone, man!” His little brother was not even waiting a moment to respond.

The opening of another door not far away could be heard and another voice joined them.

“Can you tell me, what you think you’re doing? You’re waking the entire complex, Ben!” Tom’s annoyed voice sounded from the other side of them.

“I just woke up and wanted to check she was okay but she wasn’t there!” Ben explained, making wild gestures with his hands and arms.

“Let’s not discuss this out here, come in.” Will said quietly and gestured with his head to Tom and Frankie to come over in his and Santiago’s room, who followed his request and walked over.

“You better have a good reason for this, hermano.” Santiago warned, sitting on the front of the bed he was previously sleeping till he got so rudely awakened by the young man’s screaming voice.

“We need to go look for her. Something could have happened or what if someone-?” Ben started again but was halted by his brother.

“Calm down, okay? Maybe she has taken a walk or just needed some fresh air.” He suggested, going already over all possible options in his head.

“What is even happening?” Frankie, the only one of the group that still hadn’t really caught on at what was happening asked, leaning against the table on the wall and folding his arms.

“Y/N’s gone! That’s what’s happening and all her stuff too!” Benny shouted back, nervously running a hand through his strands.

Frankie’s eyes grew wide at the reply.

“Her stuff too?” He asked, not believing what he was hearing.

“Yes! Like she was never there in the first place!” The dirty blonde said, shifting constantly around on his feet.

Well, a walk was off the table with that. Will grinded his teeth together hard. This was not good, it was far from good actually. The way things had developed in the past hours only increased the boiling inside him further. Not knowing what was going on, being kept in the dark and things happening that were so out of character for the girl they were serving with for years now. Nothing of all this was making sense.

“Okay, we get it. Let’s all not make any hasty assumptions here.” Will tried to reason and keep everyone from panicking.

Santiago shook his head and angrily spoke something while standing up and shuffling around, probably some curse in Spanish.

“What are you doing?” Frankie eyed his brother.

“Getting ready to look for her, pendejo. What else?” He replied back and unzipped his bag on the ground in the corner to get some clothes.

“Fucking finally!” Ben breathed out and was ready to go, not wanting to waste any more time than they already had. Too much in his opinion.

“You can’t just walk out there like this. We’re still on a fucking mission!” Their captain decided to join in on the conversation to remind them that their reason for being here was not a vacation but way more serious and they still needed to be careful even if they were leaving today, or so it was planned.

“He’s right. We don’t know where she is right now and we can’t just aimlessly walk around here. And we also have a flight to catch.” Will backed up Tom’s opinion on their plan, looking around the group.

“What do we do then? I ain’t fucking sitting around waiting if she comes back or not and I don’t give a shit about that flight, I’m not leaving without her!” His little brother was clearly done with talking, his decision what he’d do already written on his face.

“If she left, someone must have seen her. Let’s try asking around first and see if we can find out anything that will help, okay? She couldn’t have used the car because I still have the keys, so she could’ve only left by foot or a cab.” The other Spanish man in the room voiced his thoughts to the group, trying to intervene before it escalated into a more heated argument.

Everyone looked at each other for a moment, exchanging looks before Tom nodded and straightened his position.

“Alright. Let’s get ready and meet downstairs in 10 minutes.” He confirmed with one more look around them before starting to move toward the door with Frankie and Ben in tow.

🌿🌿🌿

Not needing the full 10 minutes to get ready, the group met 5 minutes later in the lobby of the hotel.

“So what’s the plan now?” The younger Miller wanted to know, already scanning the environment around them in search of their missing girl.

“We split up and try to ask around. Stay in the building, we’ll meet back here in 20.” Tom explained and everyone nodded as confirmation before they began to split, each one taking a different direction to begin their search.

🌿🌿🌿

The Minutes passing by and still no success for each of them, Ben stormed annoyed past the lobby a second time. Huffing from the frustration that grew bigger by the second. They needed to find her. Right fucking now.

“Excuse me? Are you looking for something?” He heard a voice from behind.

Halting his steps, he turned around.

“Yes! Have you seen the girl that was with us when we checked in?” He immediately answered. Registering the female receptionist not far from him now, that was also there when they checked in the first day.

“Yes, of course I did. She paid and checked out already 4 hours ago. Said that someone would still be in her room that was supposed to check out today.” The young brown-haired woman answered politely, offering him a slight smile.

“She- What?!” Ben felt like his legs would give out underneath him at the revelation he just heard and all color left his face.

“Do- do you know where she went?” He choked out, trying to get as much information as he possibly could.

“She took one of the cabs outside but I don’t know where she wanted to go. Probably the airport with the baggage she had with her if you ask me. But that’s all I can give you, I’m sorry.” She elaborated and gave him an apologetic look. Sensing that there was probably a not so nice reason for her leave alone but not wanting to interfere with their privacy.

“That’s enough already, thank you so much!” He thanked the receptionist, turning around and walking a few steps back, tapping his feet impatiently while waiting for the boys.

A few minutes later, the rest of the group turned up at the lobby again where Benny was already burning holes in the floor with his shoes, finally stopping when his brothers came into view.

“She checked out 4 hours ago!” He told them before any of them could ask something.

Not expecting something like this all of them needed a second to process what they just heard. They felt like someone had punched them in the gut.

“Checked out?” Frankie repeated in complete disbelieve.

“Yeah, the receptionist there told me that she paid for the room already too and that she took a cab. Probably to the airport or somethin’.”

“She’d never go alone on a fuckin’ plane, man.” Santiago joined their conversation. Not believing their female teammate would go voluntarily near anything like that because of her anxiety.

“Where else would she go with all her stuff? Another hotel?” The younger Miller shot back.

“You said she took a cab, let’s go and ask the drivers then. I saw some standing outside.” Will said, already turning around to go outside and ask there.

Without protest the others followed hot on his heels, marching out with quick steps and looking for the cabs that waited outside the entrance of the building.

Starting with the first to their left, they moved down the line as a group, asking each driver if they had driven a woman from the hotel somewhere in the last few hours.

Ready to nearly give up, they came to the last one in line. Stopping and repeating their questions for the fifth time now in a matter of minutes, not really believing this one would turn out any different than the others.

“Let me think… hm, yes. I did, actually.” The driver, an older man answered, leaned next to his car.

“Where did you drive her?” Ben wasn’t sure if he should be happy or not, that they at least had a lead where she was now.

“She’s your girl?” The man eyed him questioningly, not sure if he could trust the men in front of him, considering the woman they were looking for seemed to have left them without their knowledge. Normally a clear sign to what this could be leading to.

“Yes, she is.” He answered without hesitation, not needing to think over what he was saying. For him she was and always would be his. No question. She always had been and he wouldn’t let anything change that. Even if he’d never admit it.

Catching the other guys a little bit by surprise upon his answer, they tried to compose their faces, so the man couldn’t see their reactions. All of them knew how Ben was feeling about the only girl in their team, there was enough history between them to tell what was going on. But hearing him saying it out loud, even in a different context, still caught them a little off guard.

“I really hope for you, that you and your friends didn’t do something to her. Otherwise I have to call the police.” The driver threatened them, narrowing his eyes at the group.

“We’d never, I swear! She’s important to all of us and we just wanna know where she went, so we can go and look for her.” Ben answered honestly and looked the man in the eyes with a seriousness you only see when he was in mission mode.

“You’d better. I took her to the airport, looked a bit off and wasn’t really paying much attention, being quiet the whole drive.” He finally told them, adding the little details he had noticed.

The boys exchanged worried and confused looks at that, giving them pause for a moment.

“Thank you, sir. You really helped us a lot!” The younger Miller thanked him and walked back in the hotel followed by the others, making a straight beeline to the elevator.

🌿🌿🌿

“Any ideas?” Santiago asked while pressing the button of their floor.

“Our flight’s supposed to be in 5 hours.” Will informed, always the one in the group to rely on when it came to numbers. Her time missing making his stomach turn more with each second he counted passing by.

“Fuck that, we’re going to the airport now!” Ben huffed, slamming his fist against the wall of the elevator in frustration.

“She’ll be alright, okay? It won’t help if we’re loosing it.” Frankie jumped in, patting his friends’ back reassuringly a few times.

“Fish’s right. We’ll get our things packed up and go to the airport. But there won’t be a guarantee that we’ll get another flight.” The older Miller brother confirmed while stepping out and walking to their rooms.

“We meet at the car in 10.” They heard Tom’s voice in the distance while everyone spread out to their respective rooms, packing up everything in record time.

Before Benny could enter the empty room he carelessly left behind an hour ago, he was stopped by his brother.

“Y/N’s gonna be alright. Whatever is going on with her, we’ll find it out, okay? Everything’s gonna be fine, Ben. There will be an explanation to all of this.” Will came closer and brought him in a tight brotherly hug, holding his little brother to him. Trying to sooth his strained nerves and allowing him to finally break down and let out everything he desperately tried to hold back.

Feeling Benny slowly pulling back, he looked at him intently, not once breaking eye contact.

“Can you help Fish load the car while I get everything sorted with our checkout?”

“Y-yeah.”

“Okay, I’ll see you downstairs in a few.” Will gave him a slight smile and a last pat on the back before walking off to his room.

🌿🌿🌿

After everything was taken care of and their luggage packed in the car in an amount of mere minutes, they were off to the airport.

Under normal circumstances Frankie would drive safely, but their situation was far from anything close to it and he drove a bit faster than he should and “missed” a few stop signs along the way till they stopped after a 10 minute drive in the large parking lot of their destination.

Each of the Delta soldiers was practically jumping out of the car when they were parked, grabbing their things and speeding off, minus Tom, who’s mood had soured over the course of their not planned way back to base.

“She’ll better have a very damn good excuse for this.” He grumbled annoyed while they were on the way through the building, but the rest decided to ignore his comment. There were more important things to be concerned of right now than his pissed-off mood.

🌿🌿🌿

“I’m gonna go over to the counter and see if I can rebook our flight to an earlier one. Maybe someone has seen her too.” Will announced shortly after they stopped in front of a few seats.

“I’ll come with you.” His little brother said and was right beside him in an instant, needing some closeness to him right now to keep him grounded.

Already knowing what was going on, the older blonde accepted his silent request without any protest and gave him a quick nod before walking off together to the ticket counter.

🌿🌿🌿

“Hello, how can I help you?” A red-haired woman in probably her 30’s greeted them with a smile.

“Hello, excuse me but we’re looking for a woman that probably booked a flight here to North Carolina a few hours ago. Have you seen anyone maybe?” Will greeted her.

“Wait, I have a photo of her.” Benny added and took it out of the pocket of his blue shirt, showing it to her.

It was a group photo, made when they were back at base after their first mission together, all of them exhausted but happy and smiling. The boys were standing in a line, arms over each other’s shoulders with their girl in front of them, having the brightest smile on her face they’d ever seen toward the camera. The colonel had taken it for them, being very proud of his best team he had in Delta Force. He had given all of them a copy of it after. Everyone knew from that moment on that they would be a team forever. Ben would never forget that day, would never forget that smile she had back then. The need he felt there to always make her smile like that again.

The woman behind the counter looked at it for a few seconds until she gave it back to him.

“Yes, she wanted the earliest flight when she arrived here.” She answered, remembering her from before.

The Miller brothers shared an alarmed look. She really must have taken a plane on her own, besides her really bad fear of heights.

“Thank you really much for the information ma’am.” Benny thanked her after breaking eye contact and looking back at her with a slight smile.

“No problem. Is there something else I can help you with?” The woman wanted to know and looked at them questioningly.

“Yes, we have a flight that was booked for later. Would it be possible to rebook it to an earlier one?” Will asked and handed her the tickets and his passport to confirm his identity.

“Let me see… yes, the last free possible flight will be in an hour. Will that be okay with you?” The woman said while looking at her computer, typing away and back up when she found something.

“That would be nice, we take it.” Will answered, letting out a breath of relief. Thank god, they didn’t have to wait for hours here or otherwise we wasn’t sure if he could stay calm any longer. He was close to the line he not wanted to cross and didn’t want to risk overstepping it. He needed to stay strong for Benny and the rest of his brothers, be the rock they needed right now, even if it wasn’t easy despite his own worries for their girl and the anger against himself for letting something happen like that. He’d make sure they got on that plane and do everything he needed till they knew she was okay and she was safe. Till he could hold her in his arms again and apologize for what they had done.

“Here you go, just look out for the announcement. The gate is down the hallway and then to your left. Have a safe flight and a good day.” She smiled and handed him the new tickets and the passport.

“Thank you for everything. Have a good day too.” He said goodbye, giving her a fake smile.

“Do you really think she would go on a plane without us?” Ben asked unsure out of nowhere, looking at Will with stormy blue eyes, that grew darker by the second like his brother’s.

The older man wished he would know the answer himself but every information they had gathered so far was pointing toward it. There was no other possible option in this moment. Why did she come here asking for the earliest flight she could get then? It wouldn’t make sense if she went somewhere else and the woman on the counter would have probably told them if she left without taking her new-booked flight. But she’d never go on a plane without at least one of them, hell it was even a thing on its own to even get her to go into it. And now she should have done that alone all of a sudden? Out of nowhere, like it wasn’t bothering her in the slightest and her anxiety didn’t exist? Will’s head started to hurt from all the overthinking he wasn’t able to stop.

“I don’t know, bro. The only thing I can say is, that everything looks like it.” He answered his brother’s question after a short silence with a sigh.

🌿🌿🌿

“How did it go?” Frankie greeted them and searched both of their faces for answers.

“Our flight’s in an hour.” Will answered and handed out the tickets.

“Anyone seen her?” Santiago followed with his question, hoping they’d get more information.

“The woman on the counter said Y/N wanted the earliest flight when she arrived here.” Ben explained trying to temper his mood, lifting his backwards cap to run a hand through his hair and putting it down again.

All of their movements halted and their eyebrows rose comically high on their foreheads.

“Imposible. (Impossible.)” Frankie grunted out in Spanish, not able to hold in his disbelieve any longer at the thought. Turning around with a shaking head while walking a few steps and crossing his arms over his chest.

What made her do that? What was going on with her that she would do something like that? It was so unlike her and in this moment, they felt like they didn’t even know her.

“So, what you wanna tell us is, that she went on a plane all by herself with her anxiety? The same girl that needs at least an hour till we can convince her to get into a fucking thing like that? That would rather walk by foot instead of flying?” The other Spanish man in the group spoke up to voice his thoughts about their newly found out information. Sharing the same feeling with the pilot.

“Look man, I don’t know what the fuck is going on but that is the only thing we’ve got right now and you’re not the only one who thinks how fucked up all this is. All of us know she’d rather die than go near anything that can fly but what if she really did it? There’s no other option what she could have done, otherwise that woman would have told us if she didn’t take her flight.” Will countered with slight agitation in his voice.

“All we can do now is wait anyway.” The captain of the group added and leaned back in his seat.

Not wanting to fuel the tension, the rest of the boys decided to follow Tom’s example and take a seat and wait till their flight would be announced. They’d have 6 long hours ahead of them where they could do nothing but wait and maybe try to get some more sleep.

🌿🌿🌿

8 PM, North Carolina, Fort Bragg

When they arrived back at the familiar soil of the Delta Force base 6 hours later, they didn’t know what bomb would be waiting there for them, ready to leave a devastation in its wake none of them could have been prepared for.

“Look who finally decided to join us!” Deryll piped up smiling upon seeing the missing Delta soldiers returning, still on the security shift with his best friend Marc.

“Did they jail your asses in that airport?” Marc joined his friend, greeting the boys laughing and giving them a wave with his hand.

Quick hugs among the men were exchanged, giving each other a pat on the back.

“The fuck are you talking about?” Ben asked afterwards, not knowing what they meant.

“We were worried we had to take care of your girl now.” Mark continued with a wide grin on his face.

The group of five exchanged confused looks for a moment. Knowing they were clearly missing something here.

“You better watch your mouth, hermano.” Santiago threatened him with a serious gaze.

“So you’re letting her fly on her own now, hm?” Deryll threw in while also grinning at his friend across.

“What is this all about?” Tom asked, having enough of being kept out of whatever this was.

“You’re joking right?” Marc said, still amused over the reaction of the men in front of them, not believing their seriousness.

Another round of looks among the boys was exchanged.

“No, we’re not. So would you mind telling us what’s going on here?” Ben spoke up, making his point clear that he wasn’t joking.

That took the two security men by surprise. Sharing a weird look with each other.

“Y/N said there was an issue with your flight, so she took the earlier one when she turned up alone here a few hours ago and we asked her about you.” Deryll explained, his smile slowly fading.

“An issue with our flight?!” Will repeated, making sure he heard correctly.

“Yeah, why?” Marc confirmed it almost in an instant, getting serious now too upon their reactions.

“Where is she?” The younger Miller brother butted in, his voice growing more desperate and serious.

“Calm down man, she’s somewhere in there.” Deryll told him, making a motion with his head toward the entrance of the base.

“Was talking and joking around with us when she arrived here, so no need to worry, dude.” Marc added to his friend’s comment, hoping it would ease up the sudden tension.

“This just gets better and better.” Tom commented sarcastically, shaking his head heavily and running a hand over his face.

“I don’t know what you’re on about but get your asses in there and look for yourself if you don’t believe us. We’ll see you later.” Marc said, crossing his arms now and opening the door for them.

“Yeah, shouldn’t keep your girl waiting!” Deryll shouted after them as loud as possible with a laugh after they walked through the entrance.

“The fuck was that?” Frankie asked confused as they walked through the base toward their bunks.

“Don’t have a fucking clue.” Will replied, shaking his head at him and shouldering his luggage a bit higher on his shoulder.

“Whatever it was, I don’t like it.” Benny commented quietly and mostly more to himself, clenching his jaw.

“We should probably teach them a lesson next time if we get a chance.” Santiago added, letting his sight wander around the base.

“There’s time for that after we reported back to the colonel. Drop off your stuff and meet at the colonel’s office.” Tom ordered and broke off to his bunk when they reached them.

“Yes, sir.” All of them said in unison before splitting and going to their own.

🌿🌿🌿

A few minutes later, the boys met in front of the building the colonel was in.

“Let’s get this over with.” Tom sighed and walked in first, followed by Will, Santiago, Ben and Frankie.

The group stopped again at his office, waiting patiently while Tom knocked a few times at the door.

Being beckoned in with a “Come in!”, they all entered and shut the door behind them.

“They finally let you go, hm?” They got greeted by Colonel Sanders, standing up from his chair and nodding at them. Motioning for them to take a seat if someone wanted but all declined his offer, making themselves comfortable while standing next to each other.

“I’m sorry?” Tom asked, surprised by his greeting.

“I heard about your ‘flight issues’.” The colonel elaborated, closely observing his boys.

Their once blank faces changed slightly at that and of course Sanders noticed it right away. There was something wrong, just like he had supposed before.

Standing there in silence for a very long moment, he decided to continue.

“I guess by your reactions that there weren’t any, right?”

The Delta soldiers didn’t quite know how to respond, not knowing themselves what this was all about.

“No, sir?” Ben decided to speak up but actually cringing at how it sounded.

“I thought so. You’re here to report back then?” The colonel answered, walking away a few steps from his desk, his gaze still fixated on them.

“Yes, sir.” Will confirmed, giving him a nod.

“Is there anything you wanna tell me first?” Sanders carefully asked, straightening his position and eyeing them more intently than before.

The boys’ faces immediately fell when they thought back to what they had witnessed in the smuggler’s hideout.

“There was a little ‘incident’ when we cleared the hideout of the smugglers.” Tom answered, trying to not make a big deal out of it.

“A ‘little incident’?!” Ben shouted out angrily and glared at their captain, not believing how he could downplay so easily what they actually had seen.

Colonel Sanders heard enough to know it must have been something really serious, for Ben and the others to act like this.

“Y/N didn’t tell me anything when I asked her. So I wanna know from you what’s going on.”

“Where is she?” The younger Miller asked with worry in his voice, ignoring the comment from the colonel and only thinking about their girl in this moment.

“None of you is leaving this office before someone has told me what the fuck happened on your mission!” Sander’s voice grew louder, making it clear how serious this conversation was and catching the guys off guard by the tone of his voice.

“We… don’t really know.” Frankie answered after a moment, looking to the ground with a guilty expression on his face.

“You don’t know?!” The colonel repeated, not knowing what he should think about it.

“We had cleared the building up to the 6th floor and were checking the 7th. Everything looked clear, we even checked it twice each but then she told us to hold our position because she thought it was not clear. We were convinced that the floor was safe too after checking it multiple times and decided to move on despite her warning and not responding through her com anymore. We got to the last floor without any problems or encounters on the way. There were just a few more guys and our target on the last one that we took care of. After making sure we were done, we headed back down where we were coming from and then… we found her on the floor below.” Will explained cautiously, fully knowing what the colonel’s reaction would be.

“Found her?” Sanders calmly asked, hating where this was going.

“She… was just laying there… with all those bodies and the blood around the floor.” Ben tried to get out, the same feeling he had back there, creeping up his body and making him sick to his stomach again.

The older gray-haired man in the room tried to keep his composure upon hearing the revelation, going back to his chair and needing to sit down for a moment.

He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He trusted his boys with his life, they were his best team for a reason. How could they let something like this happen?

“When we got to her, we immediately checked if she was alive and if she had any serious injuries but we found nothing. She only had an anxiety attack and a complete breakdown right after but besides that, she physically was fine somehow. Only a slight scratch on her throat. She slept through the whole drive back to the hotel, where we took care of her gear and cleaned her up a bit since she and her clothes were completely soaked in blood. After, we decided that each of us would take turns to watch her till the next morning to make sure she was okay. Ben woke us a few hours later in the middle of the night, saying that she was gone. That’s all we knew until we tried to find her. We decided to ask around for her in the hotel first and the receptionist informed us that she had paid and checked out already hours ago and took a cab. So we asked some of the drivers outside if they had seen her and one of them said that he took her to the airport, so we went there next after we got everything sorted. My brother and I went to the ticket counter to try and ask for her, which turned out positive. The woman explained that she had been there, wanting the earliest flight when she arrived. That’s everything until we landed and went straight back here.” The older Miller continued his report, making sure to tell everything he knew and lowering his head with an almost pained look.

Now her behavior made at least a little bit more sense but still didn’t explain why she not wanted to be with them anymore.

Colonel Sanders let out a heavy sigh, folding his hands in front of him, trying to think about the best way to tell his boys what their girl had requested from him.

A deathly silence settled over the office until he decided to speak.

“I… have to tell you something.” His gruff voice already a bad omen, sounding like he was about to tell them about her death.

The rest of the men in the room all immediately picked up on the sudden change in his voice, not being used to that kind of tone but already feeling fear creeping up their spines. Not able to say something.

Sanders looked around at each of them before continuing. Making himself ready to drop the already ticking bomb over their heads to explode.

“She requested… to be moved to another team. Immediately.”

Right as the last word had left him, Benny nearly lost it completely. Clearly not expecting anything like this.

“What?!” It was the only word he was able to choke out before he felt his legs nearly giving out under him. He felt like someone had forcefully ripped his heart right out of his chest and left him to die.

His brothers didn’t take it in any different, the ground having been pulled away from right under their feet quite literally. Each of them taking in a sharp breath and needing some support from the wall behind them to keep them upright on their feet. Frankie and Santiago grabbing their caps and lowering them slowly from their heads in front of their bodies.

“This… is all just a bad joke from you and her to get back at us for what happened, right?” Ben tried to convince himself, denying this could be actually true. There was no way in hell that she actually had meant what she said.

“Do I look like I’m joking?” The colonel asked him, his expression unchanged and the same seriousness in his voice than before.

“No…. no, no, no, no, no! That’s- that can’t be…” The devastation was crystal clear in Benny’s voice. His mind completely blanked. He didn’t know what to do with what he had been told a few seconds ago.

All of their faces had turned deathly pale, completely drained from their color in a matter of a second. None of them knew what to say, what to do with that information. They just felt like someone had shot them straight in the head. Never once had any of them even thought about the one impossible thing happening.

“Why?!” The younger Miller screamed and sank on his knees to the floor with tears in his once bright blue eyes that were now swallowed whole by the same darkness that crept up inside of him in that very moment.

“Did… she say anything?” Will didn’t know how he managed to get any words out right now but somehow, they left his mouth without fully registering it.

Colonel Sanders left another heavy sigh and hung his head, knowing full well how his Delta boys must be feeling right now.

“I can’t tell you anything more than this. I’m sorry.” He apologized, hating to have to keep the promise he had given their girl.

“This must all be a mistake! This can’t… be…!” Ben continued sobbing, not being able to hold in his emotions any longer and starting to hit the ground with his right fist he had curled so tight, he could feel the nails digging in his palm and drawing blood.

“I’m so sorry. I wish I didn’t have to tell you this.” Sanders apologized again, not knowing himself what he could do to be there for them.

“Where…? Where… is she?” Having released some of his anger, Ben looked up at the colonel, tears still running down his cheeks.

“I don’t think this is a good idea right now.” The colonel sighed, knowing they probably all wanted to see her but it wouldn’t lead to something good until they at least had cooled off.

“I don’t fucking care! I wanna see her right fucking now!” Benny screamed again, raising suddenly with lightspeed to his full height with his completely shaking body.

Before he did anything he’d regret later, Will was by his side and tried to hold him back and appease him.

“Ben. You need to calm down.”

“No! How can you even stay so fucking calm after this?! Do you even fuckin’ care at all about her?!” His little brother knew fully well that he was crossing a line with this that he shouldn’t but his emotions were all over the place and he couldn’t think straight.

It was the last thread that Will had been hanging on the entire trip back. He couldn’t restrain himself any longer and finally snapped too thanks to his little brother accusing him of not caring for their girl, that was way too precious to him as well.

“You really think, I don’t fucking care about her too?!” He wasn’t able to control his rage anymore, that had been building up gradually more and more inside of him in the last minutes.

Santiago, Frankie and Tom snapped out of their paralyzed state when both of the Miller brothers were about to charge at each other. The look in their eyes one, that promised nothing but death and destruction. But before anything could happen, they intervened. Frankie grabbing and holding back Ben with all his strength and Santiago did his best together with Tom to keep Will separated from his brother.

“You gotta stop, hermano. It’ll be okay. It’ll be fine.” The pilot reasoned with him, looking him dead in the eyes.

“Stop! It won’t help if you jump at each other’s throats! You know that!” Santiago on the other side tried to get through to his friend, knowing he was the more reasonable one of the two right now.

“Enough!” Before anything more could happen, the colonel raised his voice loudly enough to get the attention of all.

“You can be thankful that this has no consequences because of her! Y/N defended all of your stubborn asses with her life when I asked her about what had happened! She even said that it wasn’t your fault!”

His statement felt like another heavy punch in the gut for the boys. Coming back to their senses again, Ben and Will looked guilty to the ground and stopped fighting against the hold of their friends that loosened their grip on them when they felt them relaxing.

None of them dared to say another word, feeling like absolute shit. So the older gray-haired man took it upon himself to continue and try to soothe them at least a little with his words, even if it wouldn’t help the deep gaping wound each of them now had inside.

“Do you think it was an easy decision for me? You think I don’t know how you feel right now too? I tried to convince Y/N to think about her decision at least for a day but she insisted and I can’t deny her that. But we all know that this girl would go through hell and back for you. She’d do anything for her possible to save your asses from whatever mess you drag yourself into. So please try to accept her decision and give her some space and time to think about it. I know it’s a lot right now but you can’t change anything about it in this moment. Go to your bunks and get some rest after all you’ve been through in the last hours. Give yourself some time to process everything and try to stay away from her for the time being. I will keep an eye on Y/N until she decides that she wants you back, you have my promise.”

The boys knew he was right, rationally. But emotionally this whole ordeal was a completely different thing. Especially for Ben, not being able to be with her, hear her voice he loved so much and could listen to from day to night and her laugh that would make his entire day when he heard it, feel and touch her soft skin on his and assured him that she was there with him, to see her smile and knowing it was because of him. All of it had been violently ripped away in a matter of seconds. He never wanted to be a second without her, always wanted to have her by his side and being reminded that someone cared about him, that she was happy and safe. Ben didn’t know if he was able to live without her, how he was supposed to continue from this.

The colonel stood up from his seat and rounded the table to give each of them a long hug, letting them know they weren’t alone in this.

“I’ll see you back here in the morning.” He said and walked back behind his table, watching them as they slowly made their way out with hanging and defeated postures. None of them capable of more than a nod as goodbye.

They went back to their bunks and waited…

…for 8 long years.

A/N: The flashback part had been sitting in my drafts for ages ever since I wrote it along the first chapter of this fic because I wasn't sure when it would fit nicely into the story or if I even wanted to incorporate it at all. But I'm excited to share it with you now and hope it was a good choice to place it here and shed some light to what actually happened from the boys' side of things! 🥰

Buckle up because we are about to go down the rabbit hole! 😎

If you enjoyed feel free to reblog, like and comment! 🥰

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[miirshroom]

Vicariously learning about Netflix DMC from people talking about it, because it does not seem like a piece of media that I would enjoy experiencing first hand.

I've heard from multiple sources about the kinds of changes in this Alternate Universe that suggest it made similar choices to DMC: Devil May Cry in tampering with the magic and worldbuilding. Kindof a red flag for the direction it's headed. The magic system of Devil May Cry is core to its world and themes. Ripping that out and replacing it with science quantum quantum explanations and making most of the demon population humans-but-not makes it a fundamentally different type of conflict, and should make the psychology of the main characters different (and if it doesn't, that's not really much better since it makes them messy in taking actions inconsistent with motivation). So if it's a choice between two different potentials which would both make the characters fundamentally different people disguised with the aesthetic of the familiar characters...it's not for me.

But really the magic thing is bothering me (because I like to dissect magic systems and their consequences)...

...like do the showrunners have the self-awareness to know that they're just swapping out pseudo-psychology for pseudo-science? Do they understand the repercussions on the message being conveyed? I still don't think that I'm particularly likely to watch the series, but a few possible points of conflict come to mind based on the general picture I've gotten so far:

Undermines the original themes of Devil May Cry, which is about fighting and rejecting pseudo-psychology and other forms of religious magical-thinking. It's a whimsical interpretation of existentialism/absurdism - rejecting the absurd by shooting it to death with bullets.

Turns a story about humans coping with their personal "inner demons" - which have manifested in physical form in various ways - into a story about how scientific innovation facilitates a disproportionately violent response towards a perceived external threat. So instead of being based on humans coping with the absurd complexes generated by millennia of religious baggage, it's about what, technological inequality? Half-demons who are inherently more quantum quantum are also inherently more prone to being governed by emotions?

People want to be addressing their inner demons and work on self-improvement - this is good. People be going on a paranoia-driven rampage of projecting personal fears and hysteria onto other sentient beings - this is bad. If the surreal inner demons are now sci-fantasy outer demons with complex and sympathetic thoughts and feelings...this is a different story with different stakes and requiring different solutions. What are you doing.

I dunno, I'm coming to the conclusion that it's actually kindof cowardly that the Netflix DMC won't confront the religious connotations of DEVIL May Cry in favor of it's science-y thing. Devil May Cry (2001) exists in the context of the JRPG tradition of "attack and kill God".....by all accounts that I've heard, Netflix DMC is too ignorant and/or too immature to execute on the existentialist themes of the original series. Belief in literal demons, The Devil, and a mythic war between good and evil is still a part of many present day religious practices - this is not some quaint and harmless obsolete belief system. It affects present day politics. By refusing to acknowledge religious magical thinking as a root cause of the conflict between irrational (emotion based) and rational (logic based) decisions I do not see how the Netflix series can be capable of more than superficial resemblance to the existing body of work of Devil May Cry.

...I guess it's good that people are getting interested from the show and picking up the games though? That's nice.