#i hope you like this because i gave it a lot of thought
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Hold me, love me, touch me, honey be the first who ever did
Future spouse turn on +18
☆ How to chose your pile?
First clear your mind, take a deep breathe and close your eyes. Ask the question in your head "what will turn my future spouse on about me?". And shall the picture you are drawn to the most will be your pile.
☆ Disclaimer:
Please if you are under 18 do not interact or reblog this reading. This content is explicit and is not for you.
This is a general reading so don't put your life on hold for it. Also, this reading is written for the feminine (women, girls) if you are masculine or identify as a man this reading is NOT for you. This reading is for the feminine collective.
▪︎This reading was done using Raider Waite tarot deck and sexual magic tarot deck.
Lots of love 💕
Arya
Pile 1 - sleeping beauty
Your current energy
I feel like this pile’s energy is quite saddening. I see that you had a project to work on and nothing went as you hoped which made you clash with your team members and caused something unpleasant to face. I see that you feel quite empty and insecure towards your own thoughts. You have many creative thoughts to offer and you are so passionate about them but I see that because your team didn't listen to you or do anything you say it left you feeling unimportant or like a "chair's leg" idk how to explain it but they made you feel like an empty vase. Also you might have been feeling quite stuck and gloomy. I see that lately your self-esteem has dropped and you feel like nothing matter or you don't matter anymore. I'm so sorry for that pile one you deserve absolutely the best. Your thoughts and ideas are valuable and if someone didn't take them seriously that doesn't mean that they don't matter. Also, I see that you might be under a psychic attack or telepathy so be careful. I see that this person who is attacking you is quite naive and they are doing it with their whole will which means they know exactly what they are doing. I see that you are trying to get over them like your mind is trying to wash them off but they are like an ink stain that doesn't really go away. But eventually it will so don't worry. For others (people who are under psychic attack or telepathy) this person is trying to communicate telepathically with you so expect them to show up in your dreams or receivesigns from them. I see that what is between you two is not finished yet. You may see that everything has finished buuuttt it is not. This person may come with a love offer and communicate with you very soon. They may be working on themselves right now. Anyways the period of stagnation is almost over or it will be over by the end of this year.
☆ Placements for you:
Pisces, Capricorn, Taurus, Gemini, Libra, Cancer. Or you have Neptune, Saturn, Mercury prominent in your chart. Or you have 12th, 2nd, 10th, 7th, 3rd, 4th house stallium or your sun moon is there. I see also moon in cancer and saturn in libra.
☆ What will turn your future spouse on?
Right off the bat I see that your future spouse will be in love with your breasts. I see everything related to them. Massaging them, sucking them, grabbing them. They also looovvvee how the bra shape them especially corsets and push up bras and also they love how they look with no bra soo ;) anyways. This person is so down bad for you like they are an animal for that part. I keep hearing the song "Addicted to you by Shakira" weird I never listened to that song before but when I described the song to my sister she gave me the name. Also, your waist and belly button. They like how your waist is shaped. I see also that you are this person's dream girl. They see you as the empress, their empress. They like how beautiful you are whether you think it is true or not. I see that they see you the empress to their empror. I also got the collar bones too. Your spouse is going to see you as something so beautiful and otherworldly. I keep emphasizing on the upper body especially the breasts and waist. I see also that they like watching you getting undressed after an event or a party. They like your whole naked form too but mostly your breasts. They also like your size too, no matter how big or small you are they think that you complete them and the chemistry is off charts. I see that you guys may have wonderful sexual chemistry like you two can't keep your hands off of each other. You see those couple who gives off the vibe that they fuck every two minutes? You are like that pile 1 they adore you. This person also gets horny by the fact that you are intimate with them and only them. They get horny or turned on by dim lights and you getting undressed in front of candle lights. Also this person might get horny when you guys hug. They just feel soo hot and bothered whenever you are around. Their love language may be physically touch. They even get horny when you set on their lap too. I see that they might get turned on when you are applying lotion, perfume or even cream on your body they get weak in their knees.
I hope you enjoyed your reading💕.
☆ Placements for them:
Taurus, Capricorn, Aries, Leo, Cancer, Pisces. Also they have moon, Mars, Venus, Neptune prominent in their chart. Sun or moon or stallium in the 1st, 2nd, 5th, 4th, 12th, 10th. Venus in Aries, mars- moon, Venus- ascendant aspects in synastry.
Pile 2 - Woman posing
Your current energy
I see that you might be stuck on someone with Aquarius placements. I see that you have finally made peace with them and you feel kind of imbalanced by that. I see also that this person kept you stuck and out of place. I see also that you are in a place right now where you can't see the truth and you are very conflicted. This confection is keeping you feeling restless and tired. I see that you are fighting internally your anxiety about them. I see that this person knows how to tick your boxes and keep you on edge. Pile 2, this person's intentions aren't fully good towards you. I see that they are only here for fun and good times but believe me it will only end up with disappointment so be careful. I see that this person is manipulating you into thinking that they are so tired and can't live without you but they are not. They know that you'll get back to them, I see that you need to stop giving them the validation that they seek because each time you return to them it make their ego bigger. You are worthy of more than that pile 2. Also, the energy under the bottom of the deck is quite wicked. This person is doing everything in their power to torture you and manipulate you.
☆ Placements for you:
Aquarius, Pisces, Taurus, Virgo, moon in sagittarius, mars in leo, Venus in scorpio, Sagittarius, Venus in Aquarius. Venus, Uranus, Neptune, Mars, moon prominent in your chart or stallium in the 11th, 12th, 2nd, 6th house in your chart.
☆ What will turn your future spouse on?
I got a lot of 10s in this pile so I guess your spouse really feels turned on by the fact that they are making a family that is going to leave a legacy behind with you. Also, this person really gets turned on when you surrender to them, I see a lot of submission. Doesn't mean that they are dominant but they generally love to see you under them. They might be a soft dom. They won't force you to do anything against your will. This pile is quite vanilla, I see a lot of fluids here. They might feel turned on by your sex fluids or they generally like to play with it. They also get turned on when you tease them. This person is foodie, I am picturing the image of Louis and Peter griffin when they were feeding each other fruits in this scene check it out if you want to. You might feed each other grapes and fruits in general. I'm not getting this person enjoying a specific body part at all. I feel like they enjoy your presence during the act more. Also, they get turned on when you hug them tightly. I feel like this person is quite traditional, they enjoy it when you make dinner for them. I see them getting back from work were you are dressing up nicely and making them a very delicious dinner. Also, this person is into sexting. I see them getting very horny when you are teasing them with your nudes. Idk this person respectively is very traditional and vanilla. I see also that they are very mature emotionally. This person get turned on by eye contact and deep conversations they might spend hours making love and they last very long.
Enjoy your reading pile 2💕.
☆ Placements for them:
Leo, Mercury in virgo and sagittarius, Pisces, Aquarius, Venus in virgo, mars in Aries. Dominant planets in Mercury, Mars, Neptune, Uranus. Stallium/ sun or moon in 1st, 6th, 11th, 12th, 9th house in their chart.
Pile 3 - Lady with flowers
Your current energy
I see that this pile is surrendering to the divine. I see that you are trying to enjoy your life as much as possible. I feel like you are living in a routine, there's nothing much honestly. I see that you are anticipating something. I feel like you want something new in your life, something to break the routine without creeping you off. I see that you always lean towards routine and structure but somehow you desire change. I see that you want change but you are very resistant to it which is creating chaos energetically. Pile 3, set with your self and decide what exactly is holding you back from the change? What is scaring you this much? Writing this down can be really helpful I order for you to acknowledge what is wrong. I see that this duality of wanting change and fearing it is keeping you stuck and confused. But at the same time you are looking forward, you are looking for a sign from the universe or God to intervene and change it. You are deeply feeling optimistic about tomorrow. I see that your energy is quite happy and warm. You might have walked away from something that kept bothering you and now you feel like that thing have no power over you right now. I see that there might be a small health issue that faced you in the previous weeks like cold or fever. But you got better thanks to God or the Universe.
Placements for you:
Sagittarius, Gemini, Cancer, Scorpio, Taurus, Aquarius, Aries. Also, I'm picking up on Mars in Aries, Venus in scorpio, Moon in scorpio. Venus, Mercury, Sun, Mars, Pluto as dominant planets in your chart. Stallium in the 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th, 8th, 11th house.
☆ What will turn your future spouse on?
Well first you got triple 888 which never happened in my readings. It means that you are going to experience infinite abundance with your spouse. I see that this person at first will be soft and sweet. They will make love to you softly, they will demand nude pictures of you and they will masturbate to it. They have breeding kink, they will imagine having a child with you while they are masturbating. They are going to make love like there's no tomorrow but as the relationship preced they are going to get scary honestly. I see that they are going to share their sexual fantasies with you. They will ask you to role play with them and the roles are going to be quite dark. Like, they might role play a r*pe scene or something very dark of course with your consent if you are comfortable with that type of stuff or not. With each day that pass they will show their kinkier side to you. I see them using their belt or whip on you. There will be hair pulling too, and heavy BDSM. I see that they will escape reality with you into the bedroom I see them really praising and encouraging you afterwards. They also might tie your hands. I see wax play too, this person is very naughty and kinky I can't with them. This pile’s future spouse might get turned on by pain. I'm picturing Angelina Jolie when she stabed her boyfriend to feel pleasure while they are doing it. This person might get horny when you are in pain. They might cause you pain too. This person is giving Christian Grey, I see that they like being in control and doing heavy stuff to their partner. Idk pile 3, if you might get uncomfortable with that try to communicate with them. You don't have to face all of this. Also, I see that this person will see you as their lover, I got the lover card and Judgement twice which is quite unusual. I see that it might mean that this relationship is meant to awaken something in you, something you are ignoring.
Enjoy your reading pile 3💕.
☆ Placements for them:
Air placements (Libra, Aquarius, Gemini). Mercury in sagittarius, and water placements (Cancer, Pisces and scorpio). Mercury, Pluto, Venus. Stallium in Air placements or houses and Stallium in water placements.
Pile 4 - Woman looking at the stars
Your current energy
I see that there's someone in your life that is spreading rumors about you. It might be a woman with leo placements or a man with Aquarius placements I'm not sure. I see that they feel very jealous of your achievements and how graceful you are. I see that you are the type of person who is very beautiful. You might be beauty with brains, someone who is very intelligent and smart. This person is spreading rumors about you and the cards are telling me that they will get their Karma so don't worry you don't have to do anything about it. The cards are advising you to have inner strength and calm down before engaging in any behavior that doesn't suit your public image. I see that you might be someone who is quite popular and known but very envied by others. Your skills and dedication are drawing the right people into your life and the right opportunities too. I see that if you are planning on traveling somewhere it will happen but also for that to happen you need to find closure and end a cycle in your life.
☆ Placements for you:
Leo, Virgo, Sagittarius, Aries, Pisces, Aquarius, Libra, Leo. Sun, Mars, Saturn, Venus prominent in your chart. Stallium in the 1st, 6th, 5th, 9th, 12th, 7th, 11th house in your chart.
☆ What will turn your future spouse on?
Okay, first thing is this person is very idealistic, very emotional and devoted. I see that they get horny when you tease them with your breasts like pressing them against him or showing them to him randomly make him sexually frustrated. I see that he gets really horny when they see you dressing up for them. A lot of emphasis on glam, they enjoy watching you dressing up, putting on perfume and makeup. You might be their type honestly. Like they were searching for someone like you and they found you soo it is a win win. This person is like pile 2, they are quite traditional. They don't have any weird kink at all. I see that they lean more to making love unlike pile 3 it was insane but anyways no judgment on my blog. I see that your ass is something that they like, they enjoy the size, shape and how soft and squishy it is. This person gets so horny when you are showering or under water. They see you as someone who is so ethereal like a mermaid. They like your body naked and wit under the shower. They might join you there too. I see that they really get turned on when you whisper in their ear and tease their neck. This person is in their head a lot when it comes to you. They might go to work and sit there imagining you two doing it nonstop and when they return home they'll be like a wild animal. He is so soft, like a soft dom again. I can't with him I try to provoke many cards but all I am getting is the cups suit which is linked to love and emotions. I see that this person is very emotional when it comes to you what matter for them is intimacy and how comfortable you are with them. Also, it keeps them going when you are in pleasure. They feel prideful when you reach your orgasm and moaning their name. Also, I'm getting Nikki Minaj here. He'll totally take it off of you after the party. Also I'm getting the song "something about you by eyedress, dent may" this person sees you like something so beautiful and ethereal. They have a lot of respect for you, they won't curse or cuss at you at all during sex. They see sex as something very sacred and romantic only shared between two people. They don't dare to call sex (sex) they'll say (love making) instead. This person is very poetic, they can and will write poems about you and set the right romantic mood for you two to enjoy.
Take care pile 4 💕.
☆ Placements for them:
Water signs (Scorpio, Pisces and cancer). Air signs (Aquarius, Gemini and Libra). Mercury, moon, Venus as prominent plants in their chart. Stallium in the 4th, 8th, 12th, 11th, 3rd, 7th house for them.
Post date: 24th of Nov -2024 Sun
* Feedback is appreciated
#free divination#free tarot#pick a card#pick a pile#divination#divination readings#metaphysical#tarot community#tarot pac#tarot reading#pick a picture#pick a photo#pick an image#tarotblr#pac future spouse#future spouse#future spouse tarot
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Endeavor Deserves No Sympathy!
I don't understand how anyone can think Endeavor was ever a good dad. It also always comes off as incredibly victim blamie, especially towards Touya, and often Shoto too.
He literally only got married and had kids to use them. He never gave a shit about their well being, never even thought about it until he had the one thing he cared about and was still miserable. I've already gone over the math proving he gave up on achieving his dream himself at 21 at the absolute latest. (https://www.tumblr.com/arceus-insanity/763259515356512256/i-liked-endeavors-character-when-he-was?source=share)
And basic math will once again be used to prove just how little this waste of flesh actually tries.
This time the focus is on how quickly he abandoned Touya and immediately went to emotional abuse via neglect & literally replacing him, and once again risking that more children be born with self-destructive quirks.
For context we only see Endeavor doing anything with his kids that's not him literally walking through and ignoring them in two circumstances. Once when Fuyumi's a newborn and Touya is attempting to crawl (not walk) over to her. And training. Those are the only times he tries to spend with any of them, even after he starts his 'atonement'
Now comparing Touya in the scene of them training and himself as a toddler and all the child imagery this series loves to use instead of actually saving imperfect victims, Touya is at least 3 (probably closer to 4) when he's taken to the doctor and they are informed of his condition
Natsuo is 4 and a half years younger than him.
We know for a fact Natsuo (& Shoto) was conceived after they got the news, not willingly either. Pregnancy takes 40 weeks average, so Touya would still be 3 when Natsuo was conceived. So once again it took this 'man' less than a year to give up and have another child he hoped to use as a tool, and was explicitly making to hurt his existing son. And as I have said plenty of times before, risking that the new kids could be born with the same disorder, I hate how convenient it is that Shoto gets near zero negative quirk side effects.
Want to know what we never see, Endeavor doing something else with Touya and Touya demanding training, it's always him walking past/ away from Touya. Considering all of the shit they've pulled to soften Endeavor's abuse both in the manga and even more so in the anime, they wouldn't skip something like this. It's not hard to tell that Touya's 'obsession with training' is really about spending time with his dad, you know like a human child that literally needs love, proven by numerous studies and research in the real world.
He throws all parenting responsibilities onto Rei, adds more children to that load, and when Touya suffers for it (like everyone else) he does nothing, doesn't even hire a nanny
Another are you kidding me take I've seen is that somehow Touya's quirk issues are worse than Midoriya's and Yuga's. Touya managed to train his quirk to produce blue fire at 13 with zero equipment and less than no help, and only lost control of it, because of the mental abuse Endeavor had inflicted on him leading him to a mental breakdown. And/ or the theory I've only seen once of AFO using his ability to force quirk activation (seen with a passed out chapter 90 during his first confrontation with All Might)
Midoriya was breaking his bones all the way into the Shie Hassaikai arc and was only able to fight because Eri and was breaking support equipment in the following arc as well. Yuga had a support belt all the way back in the entrance exam and was still struggling with that.
Speaking of Yuga let's compare parental effort here, because as much as it backfired Yuga's parents tried a whole lot more. For starters they nearly bankrupted themselves to get him a quirk, so he could feel equal. All For One is a mythic man prior to his arrest, and those who knew of him were shown to be serious long-term villain groups, so they had gone to quite a bit of effort to find that he existed to begin with. They also got him support gear (the navel belt thing) as a kid to help him with said quirk, he literally had it in the entrance exam. Endeavor never looked into that, Endeavor is not only rich too but he's a top hero he would have direct access to support equipment companies that would jump at the opportunity and it never even occurred to him.
Endeavor's name is an irony as endeavour means to try hard to do or achieve something. He never tries hard he gives up incredibly quickly the second there's any road block, but instead of moving on he makes everyone suffer for it. He's a toxic pageant mom who'd rather force their child into a toxic world and a role they don't want than work on himself
And what finally makes him change? Getting exactly what he wanted and still being miserable, and he still expects through his actions his family to cater to him.
Not his son getting a major disability due to his actions, no, he decided to double down, mentally abusing and neglecting the son he supposedly loves, raping his wife who didn't want more kids or participate in this abuse, and again risking that Natsuo & later Shoto might have that same issue. Not when his wife breaks down and permanently scars his precious masterpiece, who proceeds to rightfully blame him, and he just thinks of it as a tantrum despite it lasting a fucking decade. Not when his eldest literally dies as the result of his selfishness. Not literally during any part of this entire process!
Dabi is 23 when Endeavor finally starts to 'try' to be better, that means that for at least 24 years he has only been caring about his fucking precious number one spot in a popularity contest that he couldn't even bother to try to be likeable for, this wasn't one bad decision, this was him constantly choosing to be so insanely selfish that he found ways that shouldn't even be possible for over two decades. And it was all him.
#bnha#bnha critical#mha#mha critical#bnha meta#my hero academia#mha meta#anti endeavor#boku no hero academia#anti enji todoroki#rei todoroki deserves better#dabi deserves better#shoto todoroki deserves better#fuyumi todoroki decerves better#natsuo todoroki deserves better
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Jealous, jealous, jealous.
Summary: Little!reader spending the whole Midsummers playing with JJ and Rafe is feeling neglected.
Warnings: Age regression, slight angst, fluff in the end:)
Rafe took you with him to Midsummers, hoping that both of you would have a great time together, but unfortunately things didn’t go as planned. He was staying aside with his friends, watching you play with JJ for the whole night. Of course Rafe could’ve prevented that by paying you a little bit more attention, but he couldn’t because of how much that event meant for his family and especially for his father. So now he was just standing there and hoping that you would notice him or at least come up to ask for something, but it seemed that you didn’t need him while JJ was there. Rafe didn’t want to be that much of an asshole and pull you away from him since you seemed like you were having a lot of fun. He decided that he would speak about it with you later, in private.
When the party finally ended, Rafe had grabbed your hand, not even letting you say goodbye to JJ.
„Bye, little one!”
JJ shouted, waving his hand, causing Rafe to send him a warning glare. He’s going to have a little chat with your „friend” later. But for now he headed straight to his room, not even bothering to look at you. You could feel that he was disappointed with you or even angry, but you didn’t know what exactly you did wrong since you had been on your best behavior the whole evening. When he had closed the door, you were ready for him to tell the reason for his behavior, but instead he just silently turned around, probably not knowing what to say.
„Daddy, what happen’?”
It was something new—the side that you had never seemed before. What could you possibly have done for him to be this upset with you? You approached him, not touching him yet, just staring, waiting for him to turn around and say at least something. And he did.
„Did you have fun playing with JJ?”
His words weren’t harsh; he didn’t seem angry or furious, just... sad? It sounded like an actual question, so your little brain told you to come up with a sincere answer.
„Yeah! He gave me sweets and played with me!“
Rafe nodded before you saw something that you thought you would never see him doing. His eyes became watery before he finally teared up. In that moment you knew that you would do whatever it takes to never see that again; it was hurting you worse than any of his punishments or harsh words that he had said to you before.
„Baby, I know that I am not the best at taking care of you, so if you want to leave me, I would understand that and...”
He didn’t have a chance to finish. You immediately pulled him into your arms, giving him the biggest hug that you possibly could. You were trying to stay strong and not to start crying yourself, but you failed, letting out a few sniffles.
„I love you, Daddy, I don't want another Daddy, I pwomise.”
You said, and he finally hugged you back, pulling you closer in his embrace. Those words meant so much to him, especially after all the overthinking that he had going on in his head that night.
While he was holding you in his arms, he felt you poking his side and let out a small laugh, quickly catching your hand. He titled your head up, gently grabbing your chin with his fingers. Your face still had a string of tears, just like his.
Oh, you were both such a crybabies.
„No, bunny. That’s my method, and you don’t get to use it on me.”
He said, before quickly poking your tummy just to make you smile. Rafe then leaned down and kissed your cheeks, not able to hold himself back. He was so happy that you were still his. His sweet little girl.
„Let’s get that fancy dress off of you, and then we’ll go to bed. It’s almost your bedtime.”
You nodded, feeling a little tired and overwhelmed from all those new people you had to meet at the Midsummers. Usually it was hard for Rafe to put you in bed, but today you were too sleepy to argue.
„Oh, and also...”
His gaze met yours, and the small, sly smile appeared on his face for a second before he would say something that he knew you wouldn’t like.
„No sweets for a week.”
It wasn’t an actual punishment; he just wanted to have a little revenge on you. Your little pout was adorable to him, especially after everything you put him through tonight. But you didn’t argue with his decision.
After all, you deserved that, right?
Taglist: @tinylilacbun @aew-regression-cove @rafecameronsloverrrrr
#obx#rafe cameron x reader#age regression fic#little!reader#rafe cameron x pogue!reader#jj x reader#jj maybank
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Chapter V | Siri
Summary: You moved to one of the biggest cities in the world - Grand Line to pursue filmmaking career. Soon enough your path will cross with the vocalist of upcoming band called “The Neighbourhood”. At first you decided to be just friends - because it would be easier, but sadly as everything in life sometimes by taking the easy path we regret a lot of things.
Main characters: Portgas D Ace x Reader (female)
Supporting characters: Nami, Usopp, Luffy, Zoro, Sanji, Law, Deuce, Shanks, Buggy, Sabo, Eustass Kid, Koala, Robin, Dave (OC), (more to be add)
Description: Modern AU | Musician Ace
WARNINGS: explicit language, use of nicotine/cigarettes, use of weed/joint, slight smut, sexual content , mentions of alcohol, mentions of narcolepsy, conflict feelings, MINORS INTERACT ON YOUR OWN RISK (18+)
Word Count: 15,6K
<- previous chapter
NOTE: This chapter was rewritten like ten times and still I feel like it could of been better. As you can see from the warnings, there is some smut in it, as I decided to test the waters with it (please read the note at the end, as I don’t want to spoil anything for you at the beginning). I hope that you will enjoy the chapter as I tried to make it serious but also fun and unbelievable in some moments as it is usually in real life. Also a BIG BIG THANK YOU to all of you who comment, reblog, like and follow me it means the world to me 🥹🫶 And thank you for the sweet messages when I shared with you that I haven’t been feeling good this past week, you all are amazing human beings <3333
“It’s great, I was sure you gonna nailed it.” Dave tilted his head looking at me with a big grin spread across his face. I finished editing the footage for the music video last night and called him to meet me today for a coffee. We were sitting on a table for two in my favourite coffee shop. I was nervously biting on my nails, my brows frown not fully satisfied or convinced that the video was good enough.
“You sure? I don’t think it’s there yet.” I breathed out, rubbing my temples as I’ve already had a headache. “And I must send it by tomorrow as I promised Marco, a-and I must work on my short-cut as we start filming next week, a-a-and I don’t have location, I-I have nothing.” I gibbered, clicking on the computer mouse, opening different programs, trying to find a way to make it better. It was not good enough and I didn’t have much time left to sent it. “Why, why, why did I agree to do this?” Stress was taking over me these past days; I thought that I could manage a lot of things at the same time not realising that I was not ready for this yet.
“Hey, hey, hey.” Dave gently grabbed my hand and put the mouse away. He gently stared to run circles on my back trying to calm me down. “The video is amazing; you can’t do it any better than it is already.” He looked me in the eyes, and I could see that he meant what he was saying. “Take some deep breaths.” His tone was gentle. He put his arm around my shoulder pushing me closer to him. “You did great. Hell, I should show you the first video that I did, so you can see what a bad music video looks like.” I giggled at his attempt to cheer me up. I took a deep breath and tilted my head up as I could feel some tears building up in my eyes, ready to fall. “Hey, no crying.” Dave gently whipped the tear that rolled from the corner of my eye.
“I’m sorry, I’m not a cry baby I promise.” I chuckled trying to hold back the tears.
“I know you aren’t. I think you stressed yourself way too much.” His thumb continued to gently crease my cheek. I looked at him and nodded, my lip trembling. “The video is perfect, now save the files and just relax.” He reassured me again, giving me little squeeze on the shoulder.
“You are right.” I saved the files and closed the laptop. “Thank you, Dave.” I whispered, glancing at his sincere green eyes. He slightly nodded and gave me one of his sweet smiles.
“Don’t look at it anymore and just send it to their manager.” Dave let go of me and took a sip of his coffee. I also took a sip of mine and made a grimace. We stayed in silence for a second, as I was lost in my own thoughts, until Dave cleared his throat. “Can I... Can I ask you something?” He rubbed the back of his neck, unsure how to ask whatever he had in mind.
“Of course you can.” I turned all my attention to him.
“Is there something going on between you and I think his name was Ace?” His gaze focused on me.
“What? No, why?” My eyes were shifting between him and the coffee mug in my hands.
“Well, there was obviously some tension between you two on set, so I thought that you might... you know.” He awkwardly shrugged. I puffed and gave him a dismissive wave of with my hand.
“I was just pissed because he was late, that’s all.” I lied, something I caught myself doing a lot lately, especially when it came to Ace. “I hate it when people are not serious you know, and he wasn’t that day on set, so I got pissed.” This was not a lie. Ace did piss me off with his behaviour on set, not only for that, but Dave didn’t need to know.
“Yeah, that was a little annoying.” He agreed with me. “And arrogant.” Dave added. I side-eyed him for a second. “Honestly, from all the guys he was giving the weirdest vibes.”
“What do you mean?” I wanted him to elaborate more by what he meant by Ace being the ‘weirdest��.
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. He is your friend after all.” The regret in his voice was clear as he quickly apologised but I shook my head.
“We are not that close.” I pointed out. “But for real, why did you get this vibe from him? I personally think that Law is the weirdest.” I laughed, thinking of all the awkward situations I have had with Law. He was also the one I have spoken the least with.
“Nah, Law’s pretty cool.” Dave disagreed with me, nudging my shoulder. “Well, I don’t know... Ace was kinda giving me some weird looks.”
“What? For real?” I blinked surprised at Dave. “I didn’t notice anything. Are you sure he did?” Ace might be an ass from time to time, but I didn’t notice anything on set, he seemed pretty chilled with all of the guys.
“I don’t know, you are right and maybe I misread the situation.” I didn’t know what to respond, so I just gave him an awkward smile. “Look I didn’t want to bad mouth Ace or anything like it, I swear.” Dave run his hand over his hair, as he gave me a regretful look.
“Dave, please. You didn’t bad mouth anyone, if he did act like this then he is an ass.” I gently placed my hand on his shoulder and squeezed it. I didn’t want Dave to feel bad, for sharing his view of someone with me. “And I’m not going to tell him anything, so don’t worry.”
*************
I got home and the first thing that I did was to take a warm shower. I took of my clothes and throw them in the laundry basket. Before I got in the shower, I put some music on my phone and left it on the sink. I got in the shower and let the warm water run down my body. It helped relaxing my tensed muscles. The whole room was steamed, making everything foggy. The past few days were quite stressful for me and the upcoming ones wouldn’t be any different. From shooting the music video, to editing it and the stress if they were going to like it, to my upcoming short-cuts, my mind was going to explode. On top of it I couldn’t stop thinking about Ace, no matter how hard I tried not to. In a way he had gotten under my skin. He was so suffocating and hard to understand at times. His whole behaviour was so confusing, one second, he was all nice, bubbly and open with me and the next he was cold, and moody and overall, an asshole. I confidently can say that I’m good with reading people and understanding why they act the way they do, but Ace was another story. From what he had shared with me so far, I knew that he hadn’t had it easy in life. Especially growing up without parents, it definitely took a tool on him. I want to get to know him more and be his friend, but I’m not sure how much he would let me in his life and mind.
I couldn’t stop thinking of the afternoon we spent together on Saturday, if I was to make a cheesy movie, I would definitely recreate it. I was surprised even then how much he opened, but then so did I. Not even Nami and Usopp knew about my mother. Something that Saturday made me trust him and that same thing made him trust me. Part of me started to wonder, what if he regrated opening, as it might have been too soon, giving the fact we have known each other for almost a month. Then the scene with Samantha, and the way he was enjoying it, made my blood boil. The satisfaction in his eyes when I cut the scene right before their kiss, and the cocky smirk he had on his face, like he knew why I did it, only added fuel to my irritation with him. And the audacity to text me right after.
“Fucking Ace” I cursed under my breath as I felt myself getting irritated once again. Rubbing the bodywash up and down my body and the hot water washing it away, my mind was full of Ace. I tried to take my mind off him, but I couldn’t. I felt this warm feeling building up inside of me. I haven’t felt this way in a long time. I ran one of my hands down my neck to my breast. Closing my eyes the first thing that my mind thought off was the feeling of when I was holding onto Ace’s torso while we were on his motorbike. “No, fuck.” My eyes shoot open as I shook my head quickly getting rid of the thoughts. I tried to calm myself as I was getting heated up. I reached for the towel hanged next to the shower door and wrapped it around myself. “Fuckin’ Ace.” I whispered to myself. “Fucking Ace.” I called out louder, as I smacked my hands on the sink. “Fuckin’, fuckin’ Ace.” I got mad at myself for letting him have such effect on me.
“Calling Ace.” My eyes widen as I heard Siri’s voice. I grabbed my phone as quick as possible, which had already dialled Ace’s number. Because of my wet fingers the screen wasn’t responding, no matter how fast I tried to cancel the call.
“Hey, doll.” His voice raspy and low. “You aren’t mad at me anymore?” He snorted.
“A-Ace.” My voice came out like I was out of breath. I slapped myself on the face.
“Uh... doll? Are you okay?” His voice sounded confused. “You sound a little out of breath.”
“So do you.” I quickly replied.
“You caught me in the middle of workout.” He huffed.
“Same.” I looked in the mirror at my reflection making a grimace at myself at the answer I gave him.
“And what are you working out?” He didn’t believe my answer at all, I could of hear it in his voice.
“Running.” I spatted out.
“So, you are working our running... interesting. How many are you running?”
“Five.”
“Five what, doll?” He laughed. “You ran out of words or something?” He teased me.
“Kilometres, five kilometres.” I scrunched my face as I mentally slapped myself, as I couldn’t come up with worse answer than this.
“Wow, impressive. We should run together sometime then.” I just hummed in respond to this. “And what made you call me?”
“I...um...I called you... because...” I tried to think of a quick excuse as I tighten the towel around my body. “Because of the video.” I blurted out.
“It’s done?” He sounded surprised.
“Yes, and you are the first one to know that, remember how you ask me to be the first one to know, there you go. You welcome.” I chuckled, regaining my confidence.
“No, I didn’t.”
“Yes, you did.”
“No, I did not.”
“Ace, you did.” Was he trying to irritate me, and it was working.
“I asked you to be the first one to see it, not the first one to know.” He clarified. I bit my tongue, the audacity this man had was unmatched. “So when can we watch it?”
“I am going to emailed it to Marco, but if you text me your email, I can send it to you as well.”
“No, come over my place and we can watch it together.” I was taken aback from his suggestion.
“I’m extremely tired, so thank you, but no.” I politely decline his offer.
“Take a nap, it’s barely 3PM, I will come and pick you up around six.” He didn’t tell or ask me; he literally commanded me.
“Ace I just told you I’m tired.” I hissed.
“Didn’t I give you a solution just a second ago?” He was testing my patience at this point.
“Ace, I’m not the type you can order around.” I rolled my eyes annoyed.
“Is that a challenged, doll?” He teased.
“Ace you are...” He didn’t let me finish.
“Charmin, I know. Now tell me what your plans for the night are?” I could feel the smug smirk on his face without even seeing him.
“Sleeping.” I spatted.
“I promise I will get you back home the latest around ten.” Ace wasn’t going to give up.
“You won’t take ‘no’ for an answer, will you?” He clicked with his tongue. “Fine, but under one condition.” I sighed.
“Shoot.”
“You send me the address and I come by myself, because I’m not getting on that thing again.” He laughed as I referred to his motorbike as ‘that thing’.
“Sure, I’ll send you the address.” And with this he hung up. I ran my fingers through my wet hair and sighed deeply. I looked at my phone and whined.
“How? How did you hear ‘call Ace’, hu? Explain!” I was talking to my phone like it can respond to me. I didn’t know how to call this, but some cosmetic power out there was clearly beefing with me, as what just happened right now, was made up straight out of a movie.
**********
Around five-something pm, I woke up from the nap I took. I stretched my body and reached to take my phone and check the address that Ace sent me. It was thirty minutes away with the metro.
“Ops, guess I will be late.” I said to myself with a sly smile. Ace could wait for a little bit.
I put a pair of dark blue leggings on and just a white hoodie on top. I grabbed my bag, but first checked if I got everything with me. I left my place and went to catch the metro. After almost forty minutes I was in front of his front door. The area where Ace lived was quite nice depending on which side of it you live. He lived in the middle between the good and the bad side, which I found kind of ironic. From what I have gotten to know him so far, Ace was somehow always in between something. The building where he lived was old from the outside but renovated from the inside. He had sent me the code for the entrance door of the building, so I easily got in. His apartment was on the last floor and there was no elevator, so by the time I reached the seventh floor I was out of breath. I made a mental note to myself that I need to consider started working out. I chewed on my bottom lip as tension started to build up in me before I rang the bell, and a sight left my lips. I looked down as I was playing nervously with my fingers waiting for Ace to open the door. The door swinged open, and Ace stood in front of me. I lifted my head slowly and I was met with Ace’s bare upper body, as only a pair of grey sweatpants were hanging low on his hips. My eyes widen and I immediately looked away.
“You are late, doll.” A smug smirk was growing on his face as he saw me all flushed and avoiding his gaze.
“You are not the one to speak about who’s late or not.” I snapped quietly. He moved aside and let me in. I stepped inside and took off my shoes, kicking them on the side. Ace closed the door behind me, and I followed him. The apartment was spacious. By the entrance, on the left, was a door that was closed and next to it was the kitchen which wasn’t very big and had no door. From the small hallway we went straight to the spacious living room. The walls were anchor grey colour with some naked spots on most corners and you could see the bricks. The two big windows, on each side of the wall where a big TV was placed, were almost touching the floor, and some long off-white curtains were hanged on them. In the middle was a big L-shaped light grey couch with a square coffee table in front of it. In the right spaced corner Ace had a desk by the window, which was quite a mess with pencils and sheets of paper everywhere, even on the ground. By the desk were positioned three guitar stances, only two guitars placed there the third one missing. The corner wall there was covered in posters of different bands and artists. On the left side of the living room behind the couch almost to the corner was another door which was closed as well. The left side wall had another big window but that one didn’t reach the floor like the others. In front of it was big sideboard with a lot of picture frames on top of it. The apartment overall was super clean and tidy, which surprised me a little as I always thought of Ace as a messy guy.
“Wow, your place is amazing.” I said as he offered to take my bag, and I handed it to him, still avoiding looking at his direction. I sat on the couch where I saw the third missing guitar.
“Do you want to drink something? I have like coke and beer.” He came by the back of the couch and picked the guitar putting it back to its place.
“Is it zero?” I glanced at him, his back facing me. His broad back was defined with muscles. I always thought he had a back tattoo but apparently, I was wrong, instead the back of his shoulders was covered with freckles.
“Uh... I have to check.” He scratched the back of his neck as he smiled at me. I slowly nodded and moved my eyes away from his body as he left the room. My eyes landed on the paper sheets on the table and the pen on top of them. I tilted my head to take a better look at them.
“Do you want ice?” Ace yelled from the kitchen.
“Yes, please.” I yelled back. He came soon after with a can of Coke Zero and a glass full of ice. “Thank you.” I whispered as he handed it to me. I poured the Coke into the glass and took a big sip. Ace put the paper sheets away and sat on the other side of the sofa, leaning back as he spreads his legs like a slut, and pulled up his phone.
“Have you eaten?” He asked me without looking at me but scrolling on his phone.
“Uh, no I haven’t.” I murmured, swallowing hard.
“What do you want to eat?” He glanced at me.
“I don’t have preferences.” I shrugged. Ace looked again at me and sighed.
“Doll, relax please. You know you can lay or just lean comfortably, no need to be stiff at all. Feel at home, I mean it.” He threw one of the small pillows on the couch at me and I caught it. I didn’t say anything, I just hugged the pillow and leaned back on the couch. “So, I don’t know... Pizza?” Ace raised his eyebrows waiting for a respond.
“Sure, pizza is good.” I nodded.
“Have you tried this place ‘Pappa Grappa’ they have th-” I didn’t let Ace finished his sentence as I squeaked excitedly almost choking as I was taking a sip of the cola. Ace’s eyes widen at my reaction as he gave me a questionable look.
“Are you kidding me? They are the best! And oh my God, their chicken wings, have you tried them?” I moved to sit right next to him, excitement taking over me. Ace just shook his head in response to my question. I gasped. “Oh my God, Ace. Ace, Ace you must try them. You don’t understand those chicken wings taste like haven, like if haven was food it was going to be this chicken wings.” I grabbed him by the biceps and squeezed it, all my shyness left my body as I was babbling to him about the chicken wings. Ace smiled at my childish excitement.
“Doll, why don’t you take my phone and order whatever you heart desires and I just take care of the payment, hm?” He handed me his phone to take it.
“No, let’s split it thi-.” I insist but Ace shushed me fast.
“You are not paying for anything. Now choose whatever you want.” He leaned back on the couch, both arms behind his neck, eyes fixed on me. I wanted to protest, but arguing with Ace was impossible as he would never back up.
“But next time is on me.” I looked at him seriously.
“Yeah, sure.” He snorted. I couldn’t help but noticed that his abs tensed when he laughed. My eyes moved quickly back to his phone, as I felt a wave of heat hitting me up. I cleared my throat before I spoke.
“What pizza do you want?”
“Your choice.” I nodded to his response and went with my favourite pizza. Once I added the chicken wings as well, I handed him the phone so he could proceed with the payment. “So.. how are you doing, doll?” He put his phone in his sweatpants pocket and looked at me. Even though Ace had a smug look on his face, his eyes weren’t. His deep brown eyes had this soft look, nothing mischievous or mocking behind them, just pure softness.
“Been better, you?” I leaned on the couch, a bit of a space between us. I grab one of the pillows behind my back and put it on my lap as I brought my legs close to me and crossed them.
“Why’s that?” Ace frowned upon hearing my response.
“I’m just extremely stressed that is all.” I shrugged. “How have you been?”
“Same as always. Still stressed about your… short-cuts, was it called that?” He raised his eyebrow questioningly.
“Yeah, I haven’t found a location for the party scene, but I might ask Dave for help, as he might know someone who can let us film in his apartment.” I clicked with my tongue. Ace clenched his jaw as he hummed. “What?” I chuckled at his reaction.
“What, what?” He frowned his eyebrows.
“What was with that ‘reaction’?” I mimicked his jaw clenching and hum. Ace shook his head denying it.
“I never did this. But anyway, aren’t you here to show me the video?” He quickly changed the subject.
“Yes, I need my laptop.” I was about to stand up, but Ace stopped me and instead he did and brought me my bag. I thanked him and took the laptop out of my bag. I took a deep breath as I opened it, and it loaded. Ace sat closer to me this time, his body almost touching mine. “So, I edit it like thousand times, but this is the final edit. I was literally going crazy over it and Dave had to calm me down and reassured me that it is good.” A little giggle escaped my lips. I was too focused on the screen and didn’t see Ace rolling his eyes.
“I’m sure you did a good job.” Ace bit the inside of his cheek. I slightly tilted my head and side-eyed him, before opening the video file.
“Okay, are you ready?” I asked before pressing play. He nodded, his face emotionless. ‘Asshole’ I thought to myself, at lease he could pretend that he was excited to see his own video. I pressed play and the video started. My eyes were moving between the laptop and Ace the whole time, but I couldn’t read his face. His face was like a stone. I started to feel more and more uncertain with every passing second, biting on my nails now afraid of his reaction. What if he doesn’t like the video or worst hate it? My thoughts were running wild, while his eyes were glued to the screen. The video ended and I waited for his response.
“So…. What do you think?” I swallowed hard, the tension he was building was killing me.
“Oh, doll…” He clicked with his tongue, shaking his head as he pursed his lips. My eyes widen at his reaction.
“No, no, no.” I shook my head in distress. I jumped on my feet as I covered my face with my hands. “I knew you were going to hate it, I’m sorry, I’m so, so sorry.” My eyes filed up with tears immediately and my lip started trembling.
“No, no, hell, don’t cry, doll.” Ace jumped from the couch and grabbed me by the shoulders. “I was kidding, please, don’t cry.” He tried to calm me down.
“No, you are lying.” I didn’t believe him, his reaction said it out loud that he wasn’t happy with the video.
“No, I’m not.” He cupped my face in his hands making me look at him. “(Y/N), the video is amazing. I swear upon my dead mother I love the video, doll.” I blinked at him, as a tear rolled down my face. Ace quickly whipped it with his thumb. “Doll, please don’t cry. I just wanted to mess around with you a little, I swear.” He pulled me towards his chest and wrapped his arms around me. My heart skipped a beat. His skin was so warm and soft, yet his body felt so hard and muscular. I froze in his embrace. My heartbeat fastens, we have never been this close before, except from when were on his motorbike but that was different. I took a deep breath, and I got lightheaded. I never noticed how good Ace smelled - a woody, citrusy and musky notes perfectly mixed in one creating this intoxicating scent of a man. Ace let go of me after a moment and took a step back, lifting my chin up with two of his fingers looking at my eyes. “I’m sorry.” His eyes were sincere.
“You really like it?” My voice came out like a whisper.
“I don’t like it, I love it. I knew you can do it.” He moved a strand of my hair and gently put it behind my ear.
“You are an asshole. I hope you are aware of that.” I frowned my eyebrows at him, as I turned and sat on the couch, facing away from him. Ace smiled and sat next to me and pulled me closer to him with one hand. He wrapped it around my shoulder and whispered in my ear:
“I am. But please don’t be mad at me, doll.” His breath was hot on my skin, and I got goosebumps all over my body. I turned my head to look at him our faces inches apart. I slightly open my mouth to say something, but nothing came. My brows still frowned as I was still affected. He was just observing me, not saying anything, his eyes soften again.
“I should be packing my stuff and leave now but be thankful that I’m starving otherwise I would have been gone by now.” I finally told him, turning my head away from him. Ace heartly laughed and nodded agreeing with me. His phone rang and he quickly picked up – it was the delivery guy and Ace told him that he was going to come down in a second.
“Faster.” I yelled after him as I heard him opening the front door. He just laughed in response before closing it. I huffed and looked around. My eyes land on the big sideboard with the picture frames. I got up from the couch and went to look at them. They were mostly of him with his brothers or friends. I picked the one of all three of them as kids smiling wide with one front tooth missing, Luffy looking so much smaller than his big brothers, they were no older than eight or nine years old.
“Snooping around?” Ace said behind me. I jumped a little as I didn’t hear him coming back at all.
“Sorry, hope you don’t mind me looking at the pictures.” I chuckled still holding the frame. “This is super cute picture.” I pointed out.
“Wanna hear the story behind it?” I nodded eagerly as I handed him the framed photo. “So, me and Sabo lost the same front tooth at the same time. I think we were around nine years old. And to not feel left out, five years old Luffy went, and till this day we don’t know how he managed but took out the exact same tooth. Kid was so happy that he was matching with us, until he had to wait two years for the tooth to grow back.” Ace placed the picture on its place and we both laughed when he finished the story.
“This is so funny, but I feel so bad for poor little Luffy.” I cooed.
“Yeah, poor Luffy.” He smiled. “Come on, doll. Your wings are here, don’t want them to get cold, do you?” He pinched my cheek and turned around. Just before I followed him, my eyes landed on a picture that caught my attention. I gasped, Ace heard me and tilted his head to look at me. I carefully picked the frame in my hands. The picture was of a woman. Her hair was long very light strawberry blonde colour, a hibiscus flower was placed behind her left ear. She was smiling, her dark brown eyes were full of life and her face was cover with freckles. Ace came and stood closer to me, not saying anything.
“That’s you mom, right?” I looked at him, he was looking at the picture with so much adoration and softness. He softly hummed in response. “God, Ace she was gorgeous.” I whispered. Looking at her now I understood where Ace got his beauty from.
“I know.” He softly said.
“You look so much her.” I smiled at him. Ace looked at me with wide eyes, full of surprise and shock.
“What?” He breathed out. I put the picture back making sure I positioned it as it was before I picked it up.
“What? D-did I said something wrong?” I blinked confused.
“N-no, you are just the first person who has ever said this to me.” There was both surprise and sadness in his voice. I raised my brows not expecting to hear this.
“Are you kidding me? You are literally like her twin.” Ace swallowed hard when he heard my words. It didn’t take me long to realise that I stuck something within him with my words. I saw his reaction and gently took his hand in mind and gave it a squeeze. “I think there are some very delicious chicken wings and pizza waiting for us.” I wiggled my eyebrows at him trying to distract him from his thoughts. Ace cleared his throat and nodded, shaking the thoughts away. We sat down on the coach, and I excitedly started taking the food out of the bag.
“Could you please bring two plates and a lot of napkins please?” I flutter my eyelashes at him. He quickly got up and did exactly what I told him to do. He came back and handed me the plates as he sat down closer to me this time. “So, are you ready, to try the most tender, mouth-watering, making you taste haven, juicy, flavoury rich, orgasm reaching chicken wings in the world?” I seriously said while looking at Ace in the eyes. He covered his mouth trying to hold his laughter but his whole body was shaking. I opened the box with the wings and smelled it breathing out loudly. I took two and handed one of it to Ace.
“Now, this is not an ordinary chicken wing, so you eat them a certain way.” I lift my finger in the air pointing out how important it was for him to listen to me carefully now. “You grab the wing, you place it in your mouth and then just bite on it and pull out the bone. They are so tender that a gentle bite strips all the meat, you got it?” I pointed my finger at him.
“Got it.” He lifted his hands in the air, like he was under arrest. I gave him a cheer with the wing and nodded letting him know that he can eat now. I did the same, the moment the juiciness and the BBQ sauce touched my tongue I couldn’t stop the moan that left my lips. I leaned on the couch as I was enjoying the taste, my eyes closed. Ace was taken aback from my reaction last thing he expected was to hear me moan. He swallowed and licked his lips, looking at me.
“Doll, you good?” He lifted his head a bit to look at my face.
“I’m having soul orgasm now, please don’t interrupt me.” I lifted my hand to his face to make him stop talking. Ace burst out laughing, he put the plate to the side as he grabbed on his stomach. “What are you laughing at? This is better than sex.” I chuckled.
“Look, doll. The wings are good, I give you this – you were right about them, but…” He took a breath trying to calm himself down. “Nothing can beat sex.” He shook his head at me as he opened the pizza box taking a slice of it.
“Sex is overrated.” I disagreed with him as I took another wing, enjoying the test of it. Ace snorted out when he heard me.
“Doll, all respect here, but if you have slept only with boys who had no idea how to please a woman, that’s on them, not sex.” He winked at me, and I rolled my eyes at his comment. “Why the eye rolling? You know I’m right. Come on, if it’s not that personal and uncomfortable for you… have you never you know… had a mind blowing sex?” He deeply exhaled; his eyes were full of curiosity a little devilish smile playing on his lips. I sighed gesturing him to hand me a slice of pizza. He did and I thanked him, as I took a bite of it. I lifted my finger to tell him to give me a second before I response.
“I’ve done it only once so far, and it was bad, like embarrassing bad.” Shivers ran down my spine as I remembered my first time. My face cringed at the thought of it.
“Sorry to hear that, doll.” He chuckled before taking a bite of his slice. “When was it?”
“Last year.” I replied. “Yours?” I glanced at him.
“I was seventeen.” I got surprised by his answer. “What?” He noticed my reaction.
“Nothing just… I thought… I don’t know… like you are going to say something like fifteen.” I shrugged.
“I wish.” Ace huffed and we shared a laughed. ”But seriously, just because one guy did you bad, doesn’t mean all of them will.” I gave him a look and rolled my eyes at him. “Hey, take it as an advice from a friend.” He pointed his finger at me.
“Sure, Ace, sure.” I gave him a thumb up, as I was taking another wing.
“Hm, come here.” Ace gestured me with two fingers to lean towards him. I did and he ran his thumb on the corner of my lips. “You had a little sauce on you, doll.” He licked his finger clean.
“You could give me a napkin.” I remarked licking my lips.
“Why? I can always clean you good.” He smirked at me. I facepalmed myself, shaking my head as I tried not to laugh. I couldn’t deny it, but I always have fun around Ace. The moment I relax around him it feels like I could be myself without any modesty. We finished eating and I stood to clean the table, but Ace stopped me again and told me that he would take care of it. I checked the time, and it was already 9PM.
“Wanna smoke one?” Ace asked me when he finished cleaning around.
“Oh, I don’t smoke cigarettes. Plus, I have to go it’s getting late.” I half smiled at him.
“Stay the night, you can sleep in my bed, I can sleep here.” Ace shrugged as he sat next to me again. “And I didn’t mean cigarettes, I have some weed… you know we can roll one.” He winked at me, a little smirk playing on his lips.
“Thanks Ace, but some other time. I must search for a place where I can shoot the party scene tomorrow, as I have like five days until it’s my turn to film it.” I leaned my head on the back of the couch and tilted it towards Ace.
“I can help you with this just stay the night, plus I’m ether driving you, as I will not let you go alone at that time, or you stay here for the night.” His face might not seem stern, but his tone was.
“Am I a hostage now?” I lightly chuckled and pouted my lips.
“Hostages don’t have choice, but you do.” He raised his eyebrows waiting for my response.
“I don’t have anything with me Ace, not even a toothbrush.”
“I can give you one. Something else you would need, doll?” He leaned closer to me, his eyes locked with mine. I inhaled and exhaled deeply, shaking my head.
“You are so persistent.” I pushed him on the chest. Ace laughed at me before he got up from the couch.
***************
We shared a joint and now we were laying on the couch, soft music was playing in the background from the speaker. Ace was lounged on the couch, hands behind his neck, his head propped on the back of the couch. I was laying on the couch with my head leaned on Ace’s lap. I felt so high, as I couldn’t remember the last time I smoked weed. The silence between us was terrifically comfortable.
“Ace...” I whispered tilting my head up, to take a better look at him. He hummed in response not looking at me. “What made you believe in me?”
“What do you mean, doll?” His voice raspy and low, almost like a whisper.
“You had never seen any of my work, yet you trusted me enough to direct your band’s first and most important video...” I took a deep breath. “Why?” Ace didn’t respond at first.
“I don’t know, doll. I had a feeling, so I went with my gut.” He finally looked at me, his eyes were half lidded as usually but this time they were so red. He was probably as high as me. I slowly nodded moving my gaze to the wall covered with posters, knowing that I won’t get any further answers from him. As I was lost in my own thoughts I felt his hand on my head, his fingers running through my hair. This made me relax even more. “But I wasn’t wrong.” Ace broke the silence. “You did great, doll. Believe more in yourself.” My heart skipped a beat when I heard him saying this.
“It’s hard, you know?” I whispered. “I can’t shake the ‘imposter’ feeling in me, no matter what people tell me.” I quietly confessed. “It doesn’t mater how good something turns out to be, it is never a hundred percent perfect, you know? Like it can aways be better, yet it can never be perfect. Nothing can ever be perfect...” My voice was so low, I wasn’t even sure if Ace heard me. His fingers moved slowly and gently to my cheek caressing it. I leaned into his touch closing my eyes.
“I know what you mean, doll.” He softly said, voice still low and raspy. “I feel the same, after every show. I have been living with the ‘imposter’ syndrome my whole life.” I was listening carefully to Ace, as he was opening to me again. “I wish... I wish, I have been feeling, as an imposter, only for when it comes music, but... I feel that way about everything, even life itself.” I turned my head to look at his face. His eyes were looking at me. Sadness and doubt could have been read in them. I turned my body to the side and placed a hand on his chest, heart beating steady. His fingers still on my cheek as he was running them up and down slowly. “I feel like I’m bringing the guys down all the time. After every performance we have I’m a mess... and the feeling of not being good enough for anything never leaves.” My heart ached for him. Not only because I knew what he meant as I related to him, but because he didn’t deserve to feel this way. Ace was very talented and a good person as well, even when he was acting like an ass sometimes, but now more than ever I understood why... it was all an act, to protect himself. “Don’t even get me started on the family shit...” He huffed.
“Now I understand why ‘What's eating Gilbert Grape’ is a movie you related to.” Ace huffed again, but this time with a half smirk. I rose up and sat on the couch. I moved closer to Ace, who’s hands were now rested on the back of the couch. His head still leaned back on, he just side-eyed me. I slowly lifted my hand and without words, just with an exchange of looks I asked for permission if I could touch him. Ace barely nodded as he blinked letting me know without words or big gestures that I can touch him. I slowly ran my fingers through his dark locks. His hair was thick and little wavy, so soft in touch.
“Yea, even thought we are the same age with Sabo, I have always been the big brother, and I had to be the man in the house on top of it. A lot of my life choices were based on how it would affect them, but I can’t complain really, can I?” He might have said it like a joke, but the hint of bitterness was as clear as a glass. “You know, I might be twenty-five but sometimes I feel like I’m forty-five, life is so tiring at time.” I only nodded, not sure what to say and not knowing if I should say something in a first place. Ace closed his eyes, and I continued to play with hair by running my fingers thought it.
“You know...” I took a deep breath before I continue. “I might not have siblings or had the exact same difficulties in life as you... but I can always listen and be there for you, as I understand what it feels like, under different circumstances than yours of course, but still... After all what are friends for?” I placed a small smile on my face and swallowed hard, the word ‘friend’ was starting to take a bitter taste on my tongue. Ace opened his eyes and looked at me.
“Sure, doll. I’ll keep this in mind.” A half smile appeared on his lips. After a moment of silence Ace spoke first.
“You look tired, wanna go to sleep?” I didn’t want the night to end, yet. But even high I could sense that this conversation affected him in some way, and I didn’t want to push any further. I just nodded in respond to his question. He got up from the couch and I followed him. Ace opened the door to the room that was behind the couch and switched on the lights. The walls in the room were entirely naked all the bricks visible. In the middle was a big wooden pallet bed. In front of it was a big bookcase covering the entire wall. He had all sorts of books, movies and CDs on it. On the right side of the bed, next to the wall he had two black clothing racks, all his clothes hanged there. The left side had a big window with two white long curtains hanged on both ends.
“Do you want to change in something more comfortable?” He leaned on the doorframe, arms crossed over his chest. I didn’t pay him much attention as I was admiring his film collection, reading all the titles he had.
“You have so many DVDs.” I exclaimed amazed, I knew Ace was a big movie fan already, but I didn’t know about his DVDs collection. I was even more surprised to see that a lot of them were also quite recent movies. “You know streaming platforms exist nowadays.” I teased him and tilted my head to look at him. Giggle escaped my lips, as I saw Ace faced flushed for a first time ever. I quickly stood in front of him and poked him on his stomach, as he was trying to avoid my gaze. “I didn’t know you are such a geek.” I poked him again and he tensed his muscles after every poke.
“I’m not, I just like to collect things that I like.” He grabbed my wrists before I land another poke on him. He tried to give me a warning look as I tried to fight him.
“Geek, geek.” I couldn’t stop giggling as I could see him getting more and more flushed.
“Okay that was it.” Ace said before he yanked my body and tossed me on his shoulder with an ease. I squeaked, everything around me spinning from the fast motion.
“Ace, put me down.” I closed my eyes, still trippy from the weed. “Ace, Ace please.” I whined and begged him. He was laughing at me as I was squeaking and kicking my feet in the air, my arms around his torso as I was afraid that he would drop me.
“Not so confident now doll, hu?” He tossed me up on his shoulder again and I screamed closing my eyes as I thought he was going to drop me. Ace laughed out loud as he gently laid me down on the bed. The soft mattress hit my back as Ace propped his arms on both sides of my body. His face buried at the crock of my neck. Ace couldn’t stop laughing, his body and muscles trembling and tensing. I could feel his hot breath on my neck and goosebumps ran all over my body. He slowly lifted his head and looked at me. Both of us were still high, I could see the redness in his eyes as we locked our gazes. His laughter calmed down and his eyes darken. I felt my mouth run dry as I tried to swallow the burning feeling inside of me. All that could be heard was the muffled music from the living room and our slowed breathing. The deja-vu from the Halloween party hitting my memories. This time I didn’t close my eyes as I did before. He was studying my face the same way I was his. My heartbeat quickens, and I slowly raised my hand placing it on his chest. His skin was so soft. Ace closed his eyes as he drew a sharp breath in. I could feel his heartbeat matching mine. We stayed like this for a moment. I slowly moved my hand up to the back of his neck, the urge to pull him closer to me taking over me, but I still hesitated. Ace wasn’t moving at all and closed his eyes, as his breathing got heavy. His whole body tensed as he tried to move away from me. He sat on his keens on the bed and his eyes shoot open in panic. I push myself up on my elbows with a confused look on my face.
“Doll, have I told you that I have narcol-“ Ace couldn’t finish his sentenced as his eyes rolled back and his whole body went numb. My body rose immediately and caught Ace by the arm, pulling him towards me with all the straight I have had in me. My heart was going to explode as I didn’t know what to do, and the fact that if I didn’t react so fast Ace was going to hurt himself so bad. His body was laying in my arms, as I gently placed him on the mattress.
“Ace.” I whispered trying no to panic, as I had no idea how to help him. The only thing that kept me as calm as it was possible to be in this situation, was the fact that he was breathing steady. I gently tucked a lock of hair away from his face and placed my hand on his cheek and caressed it. My thoughts were running wild, as I had no idea how long he was going to be passed out like this. I pulled my phone out from the pocket on my hoodie and started to type fast what to do in situations like this one. My eyes were moving between the screen and Ace all the time. A few minutes later Ace started to open his eyes. I froze on the bed not being able to move as I didn’t want to scare him or something. He covered his face with his hands and rubbed his temples.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Ace groaned loudly, as he looked at me with worry and embarrassment written all over his face. “Doll, I’m so sorry. Please, tell me are you okay? Did I fall on top of you? Are you hurt?” He sat on the bed but kept a distance between us.
“I-I’m okay, are y-you okay? What happened?” I blinked at him, the shock of what had happened still haven’t left my body.
“I’m sorry, if I scared you.” He shook his head as he cursed under his breath. “I’m narcoleptic, guess I forgot to mention it before.” He mumbled as he scratched the back of his neck, avoiding eye contact with me. I reached and placed my hand on his knee squeezing it.
“Ace, it’s okay. I just got panicked because I didn’t know what to do to help you. Does this happen... a lot?” My brows frowned slightly as I was concerned about him. Ace finally looked at me. He rubbed his chin and shook his head.
“Kinda, but I haven’t had a cataplexy attack in the past eight months.” He seemed lost in his own thoughts. Now that I know that he is narcoleptic, this explains why half of the time he looked so tired or emotionless. “And you don’t need to do anything, the attack passes by itself in a few minutes, and I’m still conscious in the meantime anyway.” He shrugged as he explained to me.
“Does your body hurt? I caught you in time, before you hurt yourself bad, but still I had to pull you quite hard...” I moved closer to Ace, and he snorted.
“I’m all good, doll. Don’t worry I have fallen quite a lot, so I’m used to take hits.” I pouted at him when he tried to turn this into a joke.
“Ace, it’s not funny.” I murmured. “Do you take pills for it?” I softly asked him.
“Yeah, I do. Everyday, as I have type one narcolepsy.” He gave me one last look before he got up from the bed. “If you want to change into something more comfortable take something from my clothes.” He was about to walked out of the room when I stopped him.
“You can sleep in your bed, I can sleep on the couch it’s not a problem at all, or I can call myself uber an-“ He didn’t let me finish.
“Doll, go to sleep. I’m fine, just don’t pity me now, okay.” His face was serious, while his voice was more laid.
“I’m not pitying you.” I quickly replied as I frowned my eyebrows again.
“Good.” He said as he grabbed the doorhandle to close the door after himself. “Night, doll.”
“Goodnight, Ace.” I quietly called after him as he closed the door. I sighed looking at the closed door. He was so stubborn sometimes, most of the time actually. I got from the bed to change to one of his t-shists. I found a simple white t-shirt that looked like it would sit on me like a dress, so I took my clothes off and put it instead. I turned off the lights and got into his bed. The room was not completely dark as the curtains were open and some streetlight was reflecting. I buried my head in the pillows, which smelled so much like him. Thoughts were running all over my mind and all of them were about Ace. I was tossing and turning around until sleep took over me.
**********
In the morning, I woke up around ten something. I rose and sat in the bed for a second, looking around. A yawn escaped my lips as I reached to grab my phone. My eyes widen with shock as I saw I had a message from one of the actors for my short-cut film asking where I was, as we had arranged a meeting today in the morning. I quickly called them and apologised, asking them if they could still meet me in thirty minutes. Thankfully they could so I quickly got up from the bed and dressed myself with my cloths, tossing the white shirt on the unmade bed.
“Ace?” I called out when I stepped outside the room. I looked around for him everywhere, but I couldn’t find him. Finally, I saw a note on the coffee table. I grabbed the note and read it.
“I have some early morning stuffs that I must do, I left you toothbrush in the bathroom. Eat something. There is a spear key by the door, lock it and drop it inside the mailbox. Ace” I read out loud. An unpleasant feeling set in my stomach. I didn’t expect at all to wake up and not to see him. I shook the feeling away and ran to the bathroom, quickly brushing my teeth. I found the spear key and locked the door behind me, dropping the key back in the mailbox. I quickly ran down the stairs and then to the metro station. While I was in the metro, I typed a short message to Ace that I dropped his key in the mailbox and thanked him for letting me stay over last night. It was so cold outside today; I was freezing with the leggings and the hoodie only. I got to the university as fast I could. Running down the hallway I ran into someone’s back accidently as I couldn’t pass by them on time.
“I’m so, so sorry.” I turned to tell them, only to be met with Dave’s green eyes.
“(Y/N), why are in such hurry?” He smiled at me, confusion written on his face.
“I forgot that I have a meeting with my actors for the short-cut and they have been waiting for me for an hour now.” I quickly explained.
“Ohh shit, then run, catch you later.” He sent me off as he flashed me another smile. I returned the smile and ran to the room where the actors were waiting for me. I apologised to them again, but they brushed me off by saying that they understood.
“Okay, let me get my laptop and we can go through the script.” I smiled at all four of them. “Fuck, no” I cursed as realisation hit me. I forgot my backpack at Ace’s place. I ran my fingers thought my hair pulling it as I tried to take some deep breaths and calm myself down. I have everything on my phone as well so it shouldn’t be a problem. They all locked at me confused as I turned around. I explained quickly what I have done, and they shared some looks between themselves. I couldn’t blame them; I was all over the place today.
“I have it on my phone so it shouldn’t be a problem.” I pulled my phone which had only thirty percent battery left. ‘Perfect, just perfect’ I thought to myself, before I started the meeting with the guys.
After an hour and a half, we were done, as we even had some time to rehears and improvise the scenes. I thanked them and told them that I will send more information regarding their rolls tonight. They bit me goodbye and left. With the remaining five percent that I had left, I texted Ace a quick message that I have forgotten my bag at his place, and I really need it as I have everything in it, even the keys to my apartment, and I would be grateful if he could bring it to me. While waiting for a response from Ace, I texted Dave to see if he was still around school. He quickly replied to meet him in the chill aera. I made my way there and he was sitting with some classmates of his. He greeted me with a big smile as always and made me some space to sit next to him.
“How was the meeting?” He asked as he saw my tired face.
“Uh, don’t ask, I made a fool of myself in front of them. They probably think that I have no idea what I’m doing, and they won’t be wrong. I’m all over the place today, I even forgot my bag so I had to work from my phone, which has no battery left.” I complained and I buried my head in the palms of my hands. Dave laughed at me and softly ran circles on my back.
“Nah, you are beating yourself up again.” He spoke. “Also, what Marco thinks of the video? Did he like it?” I almost broke my neck when I raised my head fast, as I totally forgot to sent Marco the video. Dave saw my reaction and frowned. “Please, don’t tell me you forgot to send it to him.” I slowly nodded my head at his question, biting on my lips hard. “Call him and apologies immediately, as this will come out very unprofessional.” Dave handed me his charger so I could plug my phone to charge. The moment it started to charge I called Marco immediately. I explained to him the situation and he told me not to worry much just to make sure to sent it to him by four o’clock today. I thanked him and we ended the conversation.
“Well, that went well.” I exhaled as I sat back down next to Dave. I checked my phone, but I still had no response from Ace. “He gave me time until four o’clock.” I told Dave. He patted me on the shoulder.
“Why don’t you go home and send it now?” He suggested.
“Because I wasn’t at home last night and even my keys are in my backpack.” I mumbled. ‘Why wasn’t Ace responding?’ was all I could think about. “Sorry, what?” I asked Dave to repeat as he was asking me something, but I didn’t pay him attention.
“I was asking whe-“ He got interrupted by my phone ringing. It was an unknown number and I hesitated before I picked up.
“Hello?” I spoke.
“Hey, (Y/N). It’s me Luffy.” Luffy’s cheerful voice filled up my ears.
“Oh, hey Luffy. What’s up?” I was so confused. How did he get my number and why was he calling me.
“Ace gave me your number to contact you, as he said you forgot you bag at his place last night and I must bring it to you as soon as possible. So where are you?” My whole mood changed in the span of a second. Why was Ace making Luffy do this? And the thing that offended me was, couldn’t he texted me and tell me that Luffy will do it? I would have understood him that he was busy or whatever he was doing right now, but this... this hurt me a bit.
“(Y/N) are you still on the phone?” Luffy’s voice brought me back to Earth.
“Yes, yes, sorry. Um, I’m in university but I can meet you somewhere close to your place, as we live close by, and I need to go home anyway.” I suggested.
“Okay, perfect. How does it sound in one hour, as I need some time to get to Ace’s place.”
“Yeah, sure. See you in an hour Luffy.”
“See you.” He said before hanging up.
The pang in my chest was very unpleasant. Why did he do that? I checked my messages, and he haven’t even marked them as read. Did I do something? I started to recall last night in my memories to think of something that might have triggered this behaviour in him, but I couldn’t think of anything. I felt a hand on my knee, I looked up and I met Dave’s eyes.
“Are you okay?” His voice sounded concerned.
“Yeah, just tired.” I gave him a half smile. “Hey, by the way by any chance do you know anyone who might be up to let me use their apartment for my short-cut, as mine is way too small?” I asked him, as this was another thing that I had to stress about.
“I must check with my friends, but I will let you know.”
“Thank you, I will also need some extras so if you know anyone who wants to be in front of camera give them my number.” I chuckled.
“I need your number first, before I can give it to other people, you know?” He winked at me.
“What? You don’t have it?” I exclaimed surprised. Dave clicked with his tongue and shook his head. I gestured him to give me his phone so I could put my number in it. “There you go.” I nodded at him as I handed him the phone back. I looked at the time and decided that I must leave to where me and Luffy agreed on meeting. “Thank you for the charger.” I gave it back to Dave.
“Any plans for tonight?” He asked me before I leave.
“No, but I’m planning to stay at home as I really need one night by myself.” I exhaled loudly as I was really tired.
“I understand. Well, if you change your mind let me know.” He got up and hugged me goodbye.
**********
I waited for Luffy close by the supermarket that I knew it was close to his place. The weather got even colder and at this point I was freezing. I was bouncing on one leg to the other trying to keep myself somehow warm as I couldn’t feel my toes.
“(Y/N).” I heard Luffy’s voice calling and I turned around. He had a big grin across his face. I waved and started to walk toward him to meet halfway. Luffy gave me a big warm hug. “You are freezing.” He pointed out as he handed me my bag.
“Thank you Luffy, you are a life safer.” I sniffed.
“Come on, I will walk with you.” He said and we headed towards my place. “So how have you been lately?”
“Well, been better, very stressed lately. But once next week is over, I will be able to finally relax.” I smiled at him as shivers run down my body.
“Do you want my hoodie as well, I have a t-shirt underneath.” That was so nice of him, but I shook my head. “Are you sure?” He asked, his eyes full of concern.
“I’m sure.” I nodded. “But how are you? Haven’t seen you since Halloween.”
“Prety good, preparing for competition.” He responded.
“What competition?”
“Oh, you might not know but I run marathons. I have already won five, but this one is nothing big, only for people from my university.” He explained.
“Wait, you go to university?” I had no idea that Luffy studied, Nami and Usopp have never mentioned anything, and so did Luffy.
“Yeah, I’m studying animation.” His smile grew even bigger.
“What? Are you for real?” My eyes widen in surprise. I would have never guessed that Luffy was studying something as hard as animation, I didn’t even know that he can draw.
“Shihihih, yes, I am.” Luffy laughed at my reaction. “Don’t worry everyone react like this, I’m not the smartest out there, but I’m not stupid.” He raised his chin. “I might be a little dumb sometimes tho.” He nudged my arm. We laughed together. “But why are you so stressed?”
“Well, your brothers video first, it was a big challenged. And second the short-cut projects, maybe you have heard about it from Nami or Usopp. I need to find a nice apartment as soon as possible where I can shoot my film.” Tension took over my body once again.
“I can ask Sanji. He lives in a very nice and big apartment, I’m sure he wouldn’t say not.” Luffy pulled out his phone and quickly typed something in it. “Done.” He grinned at me. “I will let you know when he response.”
“Oh my God, Luffy you shouldn’t have to. Thank you so much.” I gave him a hug. He laughed again.
“Nothing to thank me for, Sanji still haven’t replied.”
“But still just the fact that you asked him, is so nice of you.” I smiled at him again. Luffy rubbed his chin and turned his head to look at me.
“By the way, is something going on between you and my brother?” Another thing about Luffy was that he was very straight forward.
“No, nothing. We are just friends, that’s all.” The bitter feeling came back, as I answered Luffy’s question. “Why?”
“It was just super strange, like... Ace never lets girls sleep over his place, so when he called me today in the morning to tell me to bring you your stuff, I got quite surprised.” He didn’t seem to give it a second thought, for which I was glad. But also, what he said caught my attention. Why wouldn’t Ace let girls stay over his place? That was strange.
“No, Luffy. Nothing is going on between your brother and I.” I repeated to assure myself more than him. “He just wanted to see the video first and then we just chitchat and it got late, and he offered me to stay over as I was super tired.” Part of what I said was true. “But could you please not tell anyone, as I don’t want people to get the wrong idea, you know...” I looked down at my fingers and nervously played with them.
“Didn’t plan to tell anyone anyway.” He winked at me. We reached my place, and we turned to face each other. “I will let you know when Sanji response.” He hugged me.
“Thank you, Luffy. You are the best.” I said returning the hug. We said goodbye and I ran to my apartment as I was freezing. The first thing I did when I got inside was to turn my laptop on and sent all the files to Marco. I made myself a cup of tea to warm myself. When all the files for the video were sent to Marco I relaxed a bit. I looked the at clock and it was barely 3PM. Instead of wasting time I pulled my sleeves up and started to work on my final touches for the short-cut. I was so focused on work I didn’t realise that almost two hours had passed since I last checked my phone. I had a couple missed calls from Marco, a message from Luffy and one from Usopp. I returned the call to Marco immediately before checking the messages from Luffy and Usopp. The phone rang a few times before he picked up.
“Hey, Marco. Sorry for not retur-“ Marco interrupted me mid sentence.
“(Y/N), great job with the video. I love it and so did the guys. We will release it on Tuesday. You definitely have the talent for it, kid. Keep the good work going.” He ended the phone call so fast I couldn’t process what he just told me. I just nodded to myself before checking the messages from Luffy and Usopp.
‘Sanji said that you can use his apartment, here is his number to contact him for more info.’ I got so happy when I read Luffy’s message. I immediately texted Sanji to thank him and to ask if I could meet with him and see the apartment so I could do my floor plan. Then I moved to Usopp’s message in which he congratulated me on the video.
‘Thank you, for helping me <3’ I texted Usopp back.
I couldn’t stop myself from checking if Ace at least marked the messages as read. He didn’t. Part of me wanted to text him and ask if he was mad at me for something, but I didn’t. He was in one of his moods again. I would just need to wait until he was in the mood to talk with me again, but I’m not sure how much I would want to speak with him then. I tried to shake him off my mind, as I got back to work.
********
The gym was almost empty due the fact that it was Friday night, so most people were skipping today, so they could get ready for a night out. Law glanced at Ace, who was too focused on his bench press set. Ace was clearly disturbed today, as he hasn’t been this moody in a while.
The music was blasting in Ace’s ear as he was focused on his set, not paying attention to anything else. Last night was on repeat in his mind as he couldn’t get (Y/N) off from his mind. The things they shared, how much he had opened to her, something he had never done before with another girl. On top of it he let her sleep not only in his house but in his bed. He broke his main rule, no girls over his house. Especially his bed, as in his mind that meant letting someone in your very personal space. And Ace hated to have people not close to his heart invading it. In the morning when he woke up, he had to go to his room as he had to get dressed for the day, but he had forgotten to take some clothes the night before. He entered the room as quietly as possible and quickly grabbed the first pair of jeans and a hoodie he could see. Ace couldn’t contain himself and took a glance at (Y/N)’s sleeping form. She was sleeping peacefully all wrapped up in the bedsheets, hugging one of his pillows. Ace smiled at the sight of her. ‘Yeah, you look like the type that likes to cuddles’ he thought to himself. He cursed under his breath for even thinking that and quickly left the room. No woman before has been let this close to him. He was letting (Y/N) too much into his life. Not only this, but he has never had a cataplexy attack in front of a girl. Yes, he has had his daily narcolepsy episodes in front of girls, but never to a point where his muscles weakness. Part of him was embarrassed, but he was more concerned about the fact that she had this effect on him. On the other hand, it was good that it happened as Ace knew he was about to lose it last night. The way she wrapped her arms around him wanting him closer, knowing that she wanted to kiss him as much as he wanted to kiss her. God he was going to take her right there on the spot. And the moan that had left her lips when they were eating, he could listen to this for hours. He could only imagine how sweet it would sound to listen her moaning and whining under him while he has his ways with her. Whoever had his way with her must be a fool to messed it up so badly. But it didn’t mater, as Ace was not going to step over that line with her. She wasn’t a girl for a one-night stand, and he couldn’t give her what she deserved so he had to keep his distance from now on. Ace wasn’t a relationship guy, neither he planned to be anytime soon. So, for a bit he must distance himself form (Y/N) for her own good.
Law dropped the dumbbells he was using and went to where Ace was working out. He was in the middle of his set when he saw Law standing next to his bench to spot him. Ace grunted and breathed out loudly, once he finished with the set and put the barbel back. He rose from the bench sitting up, pulling his headphones on the side.
“I don’t need you to spot me.” He spat at Law.
“I can see that.” Law crossed his arms over his chest as he glanced at the added weight to the barbel. “But you kinda going to die on the spot if you fall asleep pushing 160kg, you know.” He pointed out.
“I wish I can go away that easy.” Ace murmured before grabbing his water bottle and taking a sip.
“What’s up with you Ace?” Law face got serious and so did his tone. Ace gave him an annoyed look.
“Nothing.” He replied putting his headphones back before he laid on the bench press for another set. Ace rolled his eyes as he saw Law not moving away, but instead standing to spot him. He finished with his set and got up to add some more weight to the barbel. Law was just looking at him, wondering what got him so heated up. Adding how stubborn Ace was, Law knew that it would take him some time to make Ace tell him about what was bothering him.
“Pushing for a new personal record?” Law looked down at Ace as he loaded the weight. He didn’t get any response from Ace as the music was blasting in his ears.
When they were done with their workout before leaving the gym Law asked Ace if he was up for a drink later, even thought he was sure Ace would tell him to fuck off. Surprisingly for Law, Ace agreed. They bit each other goodbye and left the gym. After ten minutes ride Ace parked his motorbike in front of his building. He let a deep sigh once he entered his apartment and closed the door. He threw his gym bag on the floor and went straight to the bathroom. The first thing that caught his attention was the pink toothbrush he left for (Y/N) on the sink corner. He huffed and grabbed the toothbrush ready to throw it away but stopped himself for a second. ‘What if she needs it again?’ the thought crossed his mind before he had the time to assimilated it. Realising what just went thought him mind, he threw the toothbrush immediately.
“The fuck is wrong with me?” He cursed himself as he shook his head in disbelief of his own thoughts. He stripped himself from the sweaty clothes he was wearing and got in the shower. Ace adjusted the water to the coldest and let it run all over his body. His whole body tensed from the ice-cold water. He bit on his lip hard suppressing the groan that wanted to escape his lips. Looking down at his body Ace cursed under his breath again.
“What am I now? Fourteen?” He hissed as he wrapped his hand around his hard erection. “Come on, go away.” Ace whined as even the cold water wasn’t helping. He ran his hand through his wet hair. Ace closed his eyes as he squeezed his hand around his throbbing cock, letting a low grunt. He took a few deep breathes before moving his hand up and down. The thoughts of (Y/N) occupying his mind once again. This time he let the thoughts of her run through his mind. He couldn’t help but imagine her – down on her knees, looking at him from under her lashes. The way her (eyes colour) eyes would beg him to fuck her mouth. She might not be a virgin, but he would definitely need to teach her how to please him. Ace took a sharp breath just thinking of this. ‘Yes, yes I will teach you everything you need to know, doll’ a smirk appeared on his face when he thought of it. She was smart, so she would learn fast. He would make sure to teach her exactly how to wrap her pretty lips around him.
“Fuck.” Ace grunt as he threw his head back just thinking of her lips. The way they would feel kissing and wrapping around his dick. Ace propped his hand on the wall while fasting the pace around his painfully hard length. To have her, right here, right now would feel like heaven. Ace would be gentle with her, at least at first. He would let her take her time, as she would lick like a kitten the pre-cum leaking from his pink tip. Then the way she would wrap her pretty lips around it and give a twist with her tongue. She would cover it all with kisses while giving him slow stokes, preparing herself to take it. To then watch her struggle taking all of him in her pretty mouth, having to wrap her hand around what she couldn’t take. Ace would lose it then, as he wouldn’t be able to control himself anymore and just start to fuck her sweet mouth. The way he would wrap his hand around her hair, pulling and guiding her how to please him. A loud moan escaped his lips as he felt that he was getting close. The image of her, on her knees, his cock in her mouth, having her choking on it while hearing her begging whines and tears running down her eyes while he deepthroat fucks her. The more he was thinking of it the closer he was getting. If she was here, the way Ace imagined her, he would make sure to paint her face with his cum. Her pretty face, all covered with his hot cum, dripping down on her and her pretty lips. This though alone made his whole body twitched and his hips jerked as he gave himself one last stroke and cum spilled all over his hand and wall. Ace cursed loudly as he threw his head back from the feeling of release. His chest rose and fell with rapid breaths as he tried to collect himself.
It took him sometime to calm himself down as he felt the cold water on his back. He quickly switched the water to a normal temperature as washed his body. Ace cursed himself again. Maybe the reason he was so attracted to (Y/N) was because he restrained himself. If he had already fucked her maybe she wouldn’t have crossed his mind ever again. He just needed to get laid that was it, and he was planning to do it tonight.
Ace got out of the shower and grabbed his towel wrapping it around his hips. When he entered the bedroom, his eyes landed on the unmade bed and his white t-shirt that he saw (Y/N) wore while sleeping. He grabbed the t-shirt, and the smell of her perfume hit him. Ace went and threw it in the laundry basket frustrated. Last thing he needed right now was a piece of clothing that smelled like her. He took his phone and looked at the time. It was already nine o’clock. Ace quickly towel dried his hair and tried to style it but gave up leaving it falling messy around his face. He put a black sweatshirt on with a dark grey pants and a belt around his waist. Grabbing his jacket and keys Ace left his place.
It took him twenty minutes to reach the place where he and Law usually hang out. The bar was very known around Grand Line. Ace entered the place and looked around for Law. He was sitting by the bar and when he saw Ace he waved at him. Ace nodded and walked to Law, taking the seat next to him. Law was wearing a white loose fit unbuttoned shirt with some dark blue pants.
“What are you drinking?” Ace asked him.
“Old fashion.” Law replied while taking a sip of his drink. Ace nodded and turned to order to the bartender who gave him a charming smile. Ace smiled at her and made his order. While making it she didn’t take her eyes off him.
“One ‘Old Fashion’” She said sultry while placing the drink in front of Ace. He just winked at her and gave her an extra tip when he paid. “Thank you, let me know if you would like something else.” She returned the winked and went away. Ace chuckled and took a sip of his drink.
“So, are you in better mood now?” Law wasted no time getting straight to the point.
“What made you think I wasn’t in a good mood earlier?” Ace turned to the side to look at Law.
“Come on, Ace. What’s with you recently? Especially today.” Law crossed his arms waiting for Ace’s respond.
“Nothing, I told you.” Ace took another sip of his drink.
“Ace I’m not buying this shit.” Law knew that something was bothering his friend, and he wasn’t planning to drop it that easy. “Is everything okay at home?” he couldn’t think of anything else that might get Ace this worked up.
“As far as I know, yeah.” Ace bluntly answered. Law rubbed his beard frowning his brows at him. “Law drop it, man. I’m... I’m fine.” Ace started to tap his fingers on his glass avoiding looking at Law. They stayed like this for a moment before Ace broke the silence. “Did you fix things with Robin?”
“Kinda.” Law murmured. Ace raised his eyebrow at him. “She wants something serious, and I’m not sure that I can give her that.” Ace snorted when he heard Law’s response. He raised the glass to his lips to take a sip of it but couldn’t contain his laughter so Ace burst out laughing. Law pushed his shoulder, making Ace look at him.
“Sorry, bro. Just...” Ace started to laugh again.
“Man, what’s so funny?” Law was so confused by Ace’s reaction.
“You two have been on and off for two years, at this point make up your minds.” Ace chuckled. “Damn, and I thought I have it bad..” He murmured under his nose.
“Wait, what?” Law raised his brows confusion. “Is this whole attitude thing because of a girl?” Ace clenched his jaw and side-eyed Law. Now it was Law’s turn to burst out laughing.
“Oh, shut up.” Ace rolled his eyes at him. Law continued to chuckle when he looked at Ace and tried to calm himself. He cleared his throat before speaking.
“It’s not the blonde girl, what was her name Savanna?”
“Samantha and no. She was just a quick fuck, even tho she hasn’t stop blowing my phone.” Ace rubbed his temples.
“Oh, oh, I have a guess.” Law smirk as Ace glanced at him. “It’s the little director, isn’t it?” The way Ace clenched his fingers around the glass told Law everything he needed to know. “Hell, I’m right, it is about (Y/N).” Just the mentioned of her name made his whole body tense. “So, care to share?” Law chuckled.
“Nothing is happening between us, so there is nothing to share. We are... just... I don’t know, not really friends let’s say acquaints.” He shrugged.
“Yeah, sure. Don’t think I’m blind.” Law snorted. “The tension you two had on set could be felt from miles away. And the looks you were giving to the guy behind the camera...” He mocked Ace, who was clearly getting worked up all over again. “So, care to explain exactly what is going on between her and you?” Law was patiently waiting for Ace to start talking. Ace cursed under his breath before looking at his friend.
“She slept over last night.” Ace murmured. Law’s eyes widen as he heard this. That was definitely something new. “We didn’t do anything, tho. We could of but I got cataplexy attack. Which has never ever happened before with a girl.” His cheeks started to flush. “And another thing is that she listens, man. Not only listens, but she also understands me. I have opened to her about some personal stuffs can you believe it?” Ace spat; Law was carefully listening to him. “But that is not like my main problem right now...” He started to massage his temples, deep breath escaping his lips. “I know that I don’t like her, like... you know something serious as I don’t want anything serious, but at the same time I’m weirdly attracted to her, and I think it is because I restrain myself.”
“What do you mean by ‘restrain’ yourself?” Law raised his eyebrow confused.
“I can’t sleep with her.” Ace fussed. “She is so close to Luffy’s friends, and they are the same age, come on. I see all people at Luffy’s age as kids.” He took a big sip of his drink almost finishing it. “On top of it she is Shanks’ niece.” Ace added, giving Law a knowing look.
“Ace it’s just four years. Plus, she seems, well, she is quite smart girl, so I think you are the one who makes it too complicated, not her.” Law couldn’t really see the problem. When they were filming the video together it was clearly that there was some chemistry between them. “Plus, you can always be like fuckbuddies, no feelings attached just sex. Just sleep with her once, and if you continue to feel that way then get all this moody and shit.”
“She will get attached.” Ace whined. “She told me that she had slept with a guy only once, and it was bad on top of it, so basically, she is a fucking virgin.” Law nodded understanding at Ace’s statement. “And she is a very nice girl. You know, I will feel bad to just use her for one night.” He might be an asshole, but he wasn’t that big of an ass, to play with someone like (Y/N)’s feelings.
“So, what do you plan to do then?” Law was carefully studying his friend’s face.
“Distant myself for now. But this time for real, as I tried before but... never mind. I just need to get laid that’s all.” Ace explained, his eyes not leaving now the empty glass. Law decided to not say anything further. The solution was easy but Ace was stubborn, so it was pointless to give him any advice.
A few drinks later, both Ace and Law were having a good laugh; talking about the band upcoming projects, and things that both were interested in. Time flew fast and it was around midnight when something caught Ace’s attention mid-conversation. He squeezed his eyes trying to see better. His eyes landed on a girl, and she looked super familiar from the back. Was that (Y/N)? The hair was the same colour and length. She also seemed to be the same height. He hesitated for a moment before he turned to Law and told him that he would be back in a second. Ace slowly made his way to the girl. If it was (Y/N) what was he going to tell her? Why was he even going to check if it was her, when he literally told himself to keep his distance with her. It was the alcohol. Yes, he can blame it on the alcohol. And if it was her, he could just say ‘hello’ and that’s it, out of politeness. He felt his heart beating faster as he was close to approach the girl. When he stood behind her, he gently tapped her on the shoulder. She quickly turned around, and it wasn’t her. The girl flashed him a cute smile.
“Yes, can I help you?” She fluttered her lashes at Ace.
“Oh, sorry. I mistook you for someone else.” Ace smiled at her and was about to turn around and leave when she put her hand on his shoulder to stop him.
“Hey, not so fast.” She flashed him a smile. “I’m Diane.”
“Ace.” He replied. Ace took a better look at her. She low-key looked like (Y/N), not as pretty, but still nice. “How is your night going Diane?” A smug smile formed on his face.
“Pretty good. Always can get better.” She bit her lip, her tone sultry. “Who were you looking for?”
“Doesn’t matter. Came across something better.” Ace saw the way her cheeks blushed. These cliché lines were always working. Not always, he knew someone who was going to roll her eyes and tell him to come up with something better. But Ace shook away the thought of (Y/N). He had her low-key doppelganger here, so it would work for the night.
“Are you alone here?” She wrapped a curl around her finger and played with it.
“I have my friend over there.” He pointed at Law. “Would you ladies mind us joining you?” Ace nodded his head and looked at the two other girls sitting with Diane, flashing them a charming smile. They all giggled and told him that they wouldn’t mind. Ace turned to look at Law who was looking at his direction. He nodded his head at Law to come and join them. Law got up and made his way to them. He introduced himself to the girls and started to chitchat with them. They were giggling and blushing at him. Law wasn’t planning on doing anything with anyone tonight as he had promised Robin to go to her place after, but still little flirting with some girls wouldn’t hurt anyone. It didn’t go unnoticed by him that the girl Ace was focused on was quite similar in looks to (Y/N). Law has been there before and done that. Trying to fill the void he was feeling with girls looking like Robin, but at the end of the day none of them were her. Law didn’t want to say anything to Ace, as he knew how his friend stands on relationships, but the whole ‘I will keep my distance’ or ‘we will just be friends’ bullshit wasn’t going to work. At the end Ace was either going to end up in the same situation as Law, or maybe worse.
Another hour passed and Law received a message from Robin, asking him where he was. That was his reminder that the night for him was over. He excused himself to the girls and went to Ace to tell him goodbye.
“You are leaving?” Ace asked surprised. His eyes were half lidded since he got way too many drinks tonight.
“Yeah, man. Robin is waiting for me.” Law patted him on the shoulder. “Take care tonight, okay?” Ace rolled his eyes at Law and waved him goodbye. Law took one last glanced at his friend before leaving.
“Wanna go to your place?” Ace smirked at Diane who was sitting in his lap. He ran his fingers up and down her shoulder and neck. She cupped his face and eagerly smacked her lips on his. Ace returned the kiss, taking her lower lip between his teeth biting it. The kiss quickly grew hot as Ace’s hands started to roam all over her body. “Should I take this as an ‘yes’?” He whispered in her ear. Goosebumps ran all over her body and she just nodded her head. She called an uber and they quickly left.
Her hair might have not been as soft to touch as (Y/N)’s, neither her skin smelled as sweet as hers, and the way her eyes were looking at his didn’t spark any flame in him. But she was just for the tonight. And she had similar look to her. He didn’t even need to look at her face. The moment they laid on her bed, Ace turned her on her stomach, bending her over. And something dark took over him. He did care for the pleasure of the girls he was sleeping with. Always taking his time with them, making them feeling good first. But tonight, he was selfish. This girl wasn’t (Y/N). She was a cheap replica, nothing close to what he would feel or do to her if his doll was here. Even her moans didn’t sound anything close to hers. But again, this wasn’t the biggest problem. The biggest problem was the fact that (Y/N) wasn’t leaving his mind. And this was something that has never ever happened before. Somehow, she had found her way to get under his skin and he needed to burn her from there as soon as possible.
next chapter ->
END NOTE: I really hope you guys enjoyed it. I know that the 'smut' part wasn't anything wow, but I'm just testing the waters with it. At first it was totally different and it wasn't planned to be for Ace, but now I'm happy that I decided to write it for him, as in a way it suits his character more. Please let me know what your thoughts about it and what could I change in the future for when I'm writing a smut (u can either comment or message me). Also I felt so awkward writing it, but is it a fanfic if there is no smut in it? Feel free to comment and reblog, much love <333
#one piece ace#portgas d ace#portgas d ace x reader#fire fist ace#ace x you#portgas ace x you#ace x reader#ace x y/n#portgas ace x reader#one piece#monkey d. luffy#one piece luffy#one piece nami#one piece sabo#one piece usopp#law one piece#trafalgar law#trafalgardwaterlaw#one piece x y/n#one piece x reader#one piece x you#one piece zoro#portgas ace smut#sanji vinsmoke#sanji one piece#roronoa zoro#luffy x reader#monkey d luffy#marco the phoenix#ace one piece
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Okay so, ima type in what I typed to my friend here.
"Yeah Ima be so dead ass. ||Mel and Ekko carried the final for me, ESPECIALLY Ekko."
Yeah, they should have just kept [Viktor] being Ryze. That made more sense to me than whatever this is. And I am all for mlm rep, but yeah, this felt WAY too, Jayvikky. I liked it better that they were brothers to parallel Vander and Silco, who also found each other and became bros, but it seemed like they went with how popular JayVik was and stuck with it. And Jayce being strung with Viktor for wherever they went felt...kinda nonsensical. I'd rather that Viktor was thwarted and too far gone to then just suddenly have a change of heart and go with Jayce. I imagined that he would have a contingency where he, incase his body was destroyed, would then later rise again to try and enact "Glorious Evolution". It would go well with the themes of his beliefs anyway because every time he dies, he comes back stronger in a new body. I feel like that would better set the ongoing conflict and fit well with the game and why he looks the way he does currently.
I also don't like how quick he and Mel's reunion was considering how much he favored her along with his odd and sudden dislike for her decisions-- Seriously, where did that even come from!?"
[Thought it over further. Him calling her out on her actions isn't the issue. It's the timing and how this transpires that confuses me. He just came from a post-apocalyptic world where Mel, Viktor, and everything else came to mind. The lack of time for them to truly talk made the scene felt out of nowhere and not at all fleshed out. He goes on to place part of the blame on her when literally it wasn't. She DID manipulate but only politically. Everything else was on he and Viktor. Then, when he DOES confront Viktor, the vibes are different. Viktor hurt and caused a chain of events that led to several lives being taken to ensure survival and his "Glorious Evolution", why is this essentially overlooked? Maybe when I review this again, it will make more sense, but as of now, the way Jayce treats both Mel and Viktor is VERY questionable.]
"I would have been pretty happy if He at least gave her a hug, a kiss, something to make their relationship seem consistent with what we were shown. I know that he's been gone for a while and a lot more cold, but this was a very odd direction to go with. I am super happy about Cait and Mel fighting side by side and that Mel may be the main character for a new Noxus related show! [Which I knew they'd set up!] but this series, after seeing it in its entirety, DID suffer too much from the pacing issues. I assumed at the First Act that it was quick paced to go with how they've all been shifted into places they didn't see coming, but the pacing issues continued to bring down the quality. 3 seasons would have made way more sense and would go well with the 3 ACT formula they had used. I hope they learn from this and refrain from making similar mistakes.
[I responded to my friend who posted these images above] I knew they'd make a callback to this line eventually, and I am genuinely surprised people are not catching this obvious set up to Jinx living. Also, I am betting that Heimer did "die" but only that alternate version of himself. [Though obviously I could be wrong, though a life of various lifetimes where he helps each version of the main cast sounds very Heimerdinger of him, especially since he didn't wanna leave.]
The biggest letdown for me has to be Jayce and Viktor's story. It just...doesn't make sense with what we have been shown. Also, if Viktor KNOWS bad shit would happen when bringing Hextech to life and all, why TF would he give it to Jayce then???? Or if he STILL wanted magic to be tampered with shy doesn't he comvince himself in a way HE KNOWS would prevent what happens next, surely NOT EVERY timeline has it where you continue on the path of destruction! You see what I mean!?!? Leave the time crap to Ekko, man. This new inclusion makes no sense! And he does this in VARIOUS timeliness for some reason. Man, I wish it was just a random ass mage or Ryze, this added stuff kinda kills the finale for me🫠
I feel that making Viktor time travel ruins a huge aspect of the story, ngl, especially when Jayce argues that people can "craft their own path." The story also shouldn't have ended with what I could only assume both of them "dying" or traversing time instead. Also, the way Sky was treated and essentially replaced with Jayce feels....very very weeeeird."
[I believe that the ending just didn't land that well. I feel, now thinking over every character, Ekko, Mel, and Jinx carried this season HEAVY. These 3 were the most interesting parts of the season, honorable mention being Singed cause he be doing what he MUST. Also, what was the point of introducing Loris if all he was gonna end up being was a random guy who reminded Vi of Vander? I guess nothing is wrong with this, but when you're already stringing for time, these inclusions make no sense... I liked him, though, RIP Loris🤧. Oh, and Caut barely facing consequences is KINDA CRAZY but it goes with the themes of forgiveness/ acceptance. The Cycle would never end, after all, but yeah Vi and Cait made up WAY too fast and just shows that this needed another season. Let me know your thoughts!]
#arcane season 2 spoilers#arcane season 2#Arcane#arcane vi#viktor arcane#arcane mel#jayce arcane#arcane jayce#arcane spoilers#jayvik arcane#arcane jinx#arcane lol#arcane league of legends#arcane discussion#arcane discourse#arcane viktor#arcane vander#arcane loris#arcane caitlyn#meljay#mel merdada#mel medarda#jayce talis
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Sonadow fan child mega dump
Still working on the ideas, still not 100% sold on a name... Im trying to picture Sonic and Shadow's playful banter on kids names, making fun of each other's suggestions.
Naming:
I originally thought Sky or Star or even "Terra" which is Earths name. You guys gave a lot of really good ideas, too, thank you so much!!Sunny is cute, too and Rouge calls Shadow "sunshine" a lot. Maybe something to do with water or planetary stuff, given Shadow would have looked out of the ARK with Maria a lot.
I even thought about "beauty and the beast", naming her bell relating to how Bell was "like maria" or rather, the concept of clarity bells and chimes and the sound/mysticism of bells in history as spiritually healing.
Plus it's funny to think of her being like Sonic and pulling a "DING! times up!" and destroying Eggman's future projects.
"Beauty and the beast?? Isnt Maria your sister--" "I won't entertain your crude humor. Bell accepted the beast for who he was, not what he was called or what he looked to be. Despite what she was told about him, she wanted to offer him a chance to be happy. A chance we all deserve... Regardless how it ends, the beauty of that story, at least to me, is not the romance, it's about love. Love isn't strictly romantic. She saw his heart and showed it to him, and he learned that the world might label you, but it's you who decides to accept or deny that label." "Heh, you should start a podcast-- call it stuck in a PODcast :)" "I hope she get's my humor." "And what humor is that?" "I can be very funny, Sonic. You're just... too slow." ":0"
Story one, the failed son:
He's created in the lab, hidden from GUN, but using their resources. Shadow's basically desperate because a child, to him, represents Sonic's immortality. Sonic will die one day, and Shadow fears what that means--but he also is living through the child. He wants a better version of himself, a "pure" one.
Doom's blood is removed, but several embryos fail completely. He finds a new "stabilizer" in the way of a chaos emerald shard, which Sonic would have never allowed, had he known. I think at some point Shadow would become as obsessed as Gerald, which causes Sonic to back off a bit...
Basically this creates a chain reaction:
Shadow abandons the kid with Sonic, after Sonic learns about the shard and warns Shadow that this could be a disaster. Shadow hides on the ARK, fearful that one day he will be the only one strong enough to destroy/stop his child, should he lose control to the Chaos energy coursing through him. Using the power only harms him, but really, it's turning him into a uncontrollable vessel of chaos, like biolizard.
Somehow Shadow hopes that losing any attachment to the kid will allow his destruction to be easier, but to Sonic, he gave up, accepting the kid as doomed. Sonic resents this deeply, even if he doesnt outright say it...He wonders if Shadow could have helped him manage his powers.
Ultimate power:
In reality, the child's need for validation is the very reason he would lose control in the first place, desperate to control his powers. Sonic would try to convince him he can just be his normal self, not to use the powers, as they damage him each time. But the kid eventually loses it and tries to draw shadow out of the ARK by destroying everything he can, until Shadow can see him from space.
"You love this planet more than me... Then defend it, coward--"
Damn, the fight scene would be awful-- I picture him warping in and just decking the kid, how heart wrenching. I'm sure Sonic would be stuck between, unsure what to do. I'm not sure how it ends?
Myabe they remove the emerald and he dies? or he becomes goop like Chaos? maybe a chao egg is left behind, which might hint at something bigger within Shadow himself??
Idea two, Birth:
Basically, Shadow's body evolves to grow an egg, maybe a normal Blackarm's thing that happens from time to time, maybe something to do with some Blackarms leftover idk, but point is he ends up hiding and pretending to be at GUN or on missions until finally Sonic tries to track him down and finds him laying in some forest, in labor. Technically this is Mpreg, but visually they look the same.
He reassures him, but Shadow can't understand why sonic isn't horrified.
"What do you want me to do, call you a freak and leave? I'm sure all mobians are freakish to humans, just like humans are freakish to mobians-- Hey, my little brother has two tails with a messed up joint that lets him fly! And your dad turned into a giant demonic root ball, even that comet was made of living goop all glued together, Shadow--laying an egg is the least of your worries!"
He jokes that he can have a melt down about the pregnancy being hidden later on, instead he'd rather focus on helping him. He has 3 small eggs but one begins to grow roots like the Blackarms and it takes over the other two, only making Shadow more distressed.
He wonders about taking it to the ARK, working with the commnader until they can determine that it's safe, but Sonic jokes, "You can try, but you know I won't let you take 'em, hehehe" But Shadow can feel the serious threat underlying. He doesn't want it to be treated like a monster either and wonders what the best course of action is.
"Do you really think humanity will accept this child if it looks anything like the Blackarms? If I looked any more like them?"
Story elements:
A lot of this story would be focused on Shadow's gradually rising tension as the egg grows, while sonic seems to be in a weird state of normalcy, but also struggling to actually comfort Shadow.
"Yknow, knuckles was born in an egg." "Sonic... we have no idea what's inside of this... I wasn't suppose to be fertile, let alone this! This sint a joke, sonic! What twisted creature could come from this-- what if this is just another facet of Doom's plan?! I already lost control of my mind, now I don't even have control over my body?!" Maybe Shadow and the commander already talked. He'd want to know why Shadow's suddenly requesting so much time off, only for the professor and Shadow to reveal everything. To their shock, the commander would support shadow... "Maria was like a sister to both of us... I think in her eyes... this might be my niece or nephew." The words make shadow tense, he wasn't prepared for this conversation, let alone the commander's unusual response. "You know I hate failing, Shadow-- Ive already failed her enough. I won't fail anymore. *Ahem* I expect a full report, given you've already met my grandchild..."
Remember, the commander offered shadow to come see his grandchildren in shadow the hedgehog (2004), so I'd like to think he's trying really hard to be better.
Really feeling this scheme
Guys can you help me with sonadow baby names
I have no idea what to say, but I want it to feel meaningful to Shadow, but maybe they have a real name and a "cool" name, like Sonic, Tails, y'know?
Might go with a girl? I just wanna make one to know what that looks like.
Thinking Navy. Maybe Ashen color. I think there'll start Ashen purple, later becoming darker, indigo-navy color, possibly stripes but idk, they would still have Blackarms DNA
#shadow the hedgehog#sonic the hedgehog#sonadow#shadonic#shadow fankid#fan child#fan kid#sonadow fanchild#sonadow hc
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Catbatfam Wayne family lore pt2 (Mostly Tim cuz I had thoughts)
Next door to the Wayne family are the Drake household. Now, you know how fanon Tim Drake has horrifically neglective parents to the point where he should definitely be dead by 6 years old? Yeah Kitty Timothy has that. Since he is just a cat, they pile food in a few bowls and then leave. They have an automatic litter box (DANGEROUS. ESPECIALLY FOR KITTENS.) so he's not getting infections, but he's definitely running out of food before the weeks are over and they pop back in (also the food is stale. Gross)
Timothy is a well behaved pet regardless, essentially hoping that if he's cute enough they'll stop leaving him to his own devices. Never works. He becomes a real good hunter, and no one ever finds out about the rat infestation. So he's pretty independent, but not feral. He also gets into the habit of watching the streets from the window, catching Bruce walking past multiple times.
(Sometimes the Drakes forget to pay the power bill for a little. Thankfully they gave him his own cat room, and he piles blankets that he lies under with only his nose poking out.)
One day, he has ran out of food and he must've over hunted because the rats aren't there. But Bruce is outside again. And Tim is hungry. So he starts screaming, yelling and rubbing his face against the glass. Bruce stops and runs up to press his nose against the glass, proceeding to break into Drake Manor and steal their kitten
Martha and Thomas are once again rushing to the vet, and once again contacting lawyers over animal neglect. The poor thing is half starved! He's got scratches and illnesses from the rats! He has signs of prolonged exposure to the cold! Bad pet ownership!
They now own 5 cats. They never planned on 5 cats, and the kittens all get along like a house on fire. They're all similar ages, only a few months in between them, with such different personalities.
Dick won't stop hissing at strangers but turns into a loud and clingy kitten the second he's near family. He's curious and constantly overestimating how far he can jump. He's often in the living areas, perched over the fireplace or becoming one with the couch. He's also the most prone to going full Zoomies. He will be running in circles for the next 10 minutes actually.
Jason isn't loud but he's clumsy (he trips on the stairs like. A lot. They think it's because of the lack of tail) and he prefers the library and the kitchen to any other room in the manor. (Some servants will open random books and leave them out, they have lists of which ones he does and doesn't lay on, called "Jason's Favorites") he gets along with Alfred, who also frequents the kitchens.
Tim, despite being initially quiet and loving, has taken a more aloof stance once he's sure they won't just leave he hangs out in the offices a lot, to the point where they get him a little laptop toy (it's actually a real laptop. They enjoy looking through his search history: "afwgvbndnnnnnn nnnn") he does love pets, but won't actively push against someone. He will, however, linger in a room and stand juuust close enough that you could pet him. If you wanted to. Yknow, no pressure or anything. He's a little stalker cat, and prefers to watch everyone from above.
And all of them sneak out. Together. They use the doggy door, of course, but sometimes they all just vanish and then come back in using the door. Literally how, they have CAMERAS. Martha loves her grandbabies but she swears they're giving her gray hair. She's only in her thirties! She should not have gray hair!
Once again though, another video surfaces on the internet. Tim is sitting on a box, watching Dick and Babs play while Jason bats at Bruce's tail, when another cat literally falls on him. A Bengal with a large bell attached to her collar that darts away at Tim's affronted screech. She crouches down, tail flicking, before rolling around like a dog asking to play. Tim watches, unamused.
They end up playing anyway. Bruce also catches her at one point and licks the shit out of her fur, which is dirty as all hell. A post from a tired nurse reveals the kitten to be Stephanie, though Crystal Brown records herself fondly saying hello to her "dear Stephie" and asking how she got outside. Stephanie responds by rolling onto her back and purring.
Tim starts regularly showing up at her window, where they either watch pedestrians or play fight with the window between them (have you ever seen videos of kittens doing that? Cute as shit. They end up bonking their heads against the glass every single time) they officially don't do much more though, as Stephanie is supposed to be a strictly indoor cat. (More videos emerge of Stephanie breaking out while Crystal is at work. Poor nurse is fighting a loosing battle)
After a few weeks, the family relaxes again. Surely that's it, Bruce and his weird kitten collecting is over now.
Then he comes home with a silent Burmese kitten.
Bruce where do you keep getting these. They find nothing on her. As far as they can tell, she's a stray, but she's not injured or ill in any way. There's no identification and she won't speak at all.
(Did you know that cats don't meow into adulthood? Meowing is a baby noise. Cats actual noises are outside of our hearing range, all we can hear are "FUCK OFF LEAVE ME ALONE!" and "IM BABY GIVE ME LOVE!" Cats are taught by those older than them to keep meowing so that they can communicate with us.)
They take her home, and she follows everyone around. She walks on silent feet, often scareing the absolute crap out of however spots her (or trips over her)
One day she's watching Dick intensely, watching the way that Thomas interacts with him. She pads over, sits, and stares at him. He stares back. She tilts her head. He blinks and then Dick calls his attention away by meowing at him. And Cass stares at the both of them. Then she hops up on Thomas's lap, props herself up on his chest with her front legs, and meows at him. He's delighted, she loves being able to ask for shit and communicate, Dick is mostly just grumpy that Thomas stopped petting him.
Then, again surely that's it. Surely. We definitely have the room but Bruce we went from 2 cats to 6 in a month. Slow down. Martha is it just me or does taking care of these cats feel like we just chose to have children in a more convoluted way?
They are wrong.
#catbatfam series#martha wayne#thomas wayne#bruce wayne#dick grayson#richard grayson#jason todd#tim drake#timothy drake#steph brown#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#cass cain#batman au#batman#dc
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I gotta ask as I’ve just recently read some of HungryHero and I gotta say the writing is fantastic. As a writer myself I want to ask what gave you the idea to write the story to begin with? If someone hasn’t asked already of course
I’m glad you enjoyed it! I really do enjoy writing for that au (as difficult as it might me).
The main thing for HH— and any au I have— is derived from personal trauma or stressful parts in my life, along with just general curiosity or interest. I use my stories more as a form of a coping mechanism. Also, I just use it to have fun with any idea that comes across my head.
The idea for HungryHero initially came after an extreme change in my life, which made me very upset and angry and I needed an outlet. This was at the time where Sonic.exe became popular again, so I also wanted to make a fairly edgy AU (inadvertently originally making him an exe).
The idea that initially kickstarted the whole “cannibalistic Sonic” idea came from a small web comic We Need to Talk About Tails. Eventually morphing into the original version of HungryHero.
After the first act was completed, I took a small break, eventually coming back to it and realizing exactly how dark, edgy, and out of character it was, so I completely rewrote it to be more in line with how the characters would act in each situation. While my AU’s are often mostly not cannon, I still like to keep them at least somewhat consistent to their cannon counterparts, it makes things a lot more interesting.
Sonic does still get mischaracterized in HungryHero as some crazy murder cannibal (fair, he was like that for a while). But more recently he’s been written with the thought “what would happen if Sonic began craving flesh?” Knowing how Sonic usually acts, and adding a little bit more emotion in order to sympathize with him better
I still get shit on for HH because it’s my most popular AU. A lot of people don’t understand that it’s not SUPPOSED to be cannon, so they shit on certain plot points and facts (that are often outdated). If they just hate him because I made him trans. As if that’s even the main focus of the damn story.
Even with the struggles, I still love this AU to death, and I hope I can continue it for everyone who’s been waiting.
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hi, I hope you are well!
i have a askk
what about Genshin Impact characters with a fem!reader who has powers similar to Gojo Satoru?
Hey! Sorry for the late delivery 😭
You didn't specify which characters you wanted so I just put the ones I thought fit on my proposal 👁
Characters: Wanderer (Scaramouche), Lisa, Diluc, Xiao, Thoma, Lumine/Aether (both travelers).
Content: It can be interpreted as platonic or romantic, some swear words perhaps, mention of violence typical of the Jujutsu Kaisen canon, reader is gn but more like male because Gojo is a man.
Comments and reblogs are very welcome ♡
[Name] was a complex individual. He/She came to Teyvat along with the traveler, apparently being from a noble family from his/her and the traveler's original world. Yet, his/her incredibly strong strength and abilities coupled with his/her arrogant personality make the residents of Teyvat confused.
"What the f*ck are you doing?" Wanderer, or Scara, as you call him against his will, while you two were on a mission, looking for mint for the traveler.
"Can't you see? Water fall! Hehe~" you laughed foolishly as your technique prevented the water from reaching you, making a small waterfall above your head.
Scara let out a sound similar to a grunt mixed with a deep sigh.
"Why in the world traveler just have to put me with you?"
“Oh, stop complaining. I bet you’re secretly having fun.”
“Having fun? What in Teyvat makes you think that’s fun?” Scara narrowed his eyes at [Name], clearly exasperated.
“Well, you’re still here, aren’t you? If you really wanted to leave, you would have found a way by now.”
For a moment, the Wanderer was silent, his prepared response dying in his throat. He stared at the waterfall, and as much as he wanted to deny it, there was something... comforting about the scene. Something so simple, yet so absurdly peaceful that he couldn't help but let his guard down a little. He looked away, sulking.
"You're insufferable." he finally muttered, though his voice sounded less sharp.
"That sounds like a compliment coming from you!" [Name] replied with a wink.
Scara gave him a long, sharp look. "If you don't find the mint in ten minutes, I'll throw you under the waterfall for real."
The traveler was worried that you would end up killing each other. Surprisingly, you are always cursing each other but you have never gotten physical.
Perhaps it helped that the traveler made it clear to the Wanderer that you were the strongest in your world. Scara is not stupid, he doesn't pick fights with the stronger ones. Yet, he learned a lot about the kind of person you are.
"I'd like to find those artifact books before the traveler gets mad at me. I mean, Lumine/Aether can even cry!" [Name] said with an overly dramatic air, leaning forward slightly as she stared at Jean.
Jean just shook her head and sighed. Despite everything, a slight smile played at the corners of her lips, evidence that she did, in fact, find [Name]'s antics amusing.
"You never miss a chance to put on a show, do you?" Jean commented.
At the top of the stairs, Lisa watched the exchange with a mix of amusement and curiosity.
Leaning against the banister, she looks at [Name]. “Hmm, if I were crying, would you comfort me? Honestly, I would love that.”
[Name] looked up at Lisa, eyes shining with provocation. “Ah, Lisa, but you never cry! You’re too strong for that.”
“Aha, really?” Lisa smiled and laughed softly.
When Traveler asked if you really thought Lisa was that strong or were joking, you just shrugged.
Honestly, Lisa could be really strong!... or it could be pure flattery too, who knows?
“What kind of bartender doesn’t like alcohol?” [Name] asked, arching an eyebrow as watched Diluc with a wry smile, fiddling with the dessert glass you had just finished devouring.
Diluc paused for a moment, the cloth falling onto the counter with a restrained sigh. He stared at [Name] with an expression that was on the edge of patience, his eyes narrowed. "I don't think you're the ideal person to judge me," Diluc retorted, his fingers touching the glass gently. "Being the psychotic for sweets that you are, I mean."
You made a dramatic movement of placing your hand over your chest, simulating an expression of exaggerated offense.
"Aaah, but that has nothing to do with it! I don't own a wine cellar!" You replied, turning your face away.
"If I work as a gravedigger, do I need to be buried?" Diluc said dryly, placing the glass back on the shelf with precision.
"That doesn't even make sense!" [Name] exclaimed, shrugging. "You're just making things up because you have no arguments." the sarcasm was clear in your voice, but there was also a subtle glint in your eyes that suggested you was enjoying the exchange.
Diluc let out a sigh, looking more tired than irritated.
"Tell me, [Name], why exactly is someone who clearly doesn't enjoy alcohol here in my wine cellar, filling my counter with candy crumbs?" he asked, taking a step towards the counter to organize the bottles with meticulous precision.
[Name] made a dramatic gesture with the hands, smiling teasingly. "Oh, it's nothing. I just like looking at your face and your red hair~"
Diluc huffed, crossing his arms and glaring at [Name] with a mixture of irritation and resignation. “[Name], don’t you have anything better to do than break into my wine cellar and distract me while I work?” he asked, his tone exasperated but low enough not to draw the attention of his employees.
“No, actually, I don’t,” [Name] replied, with a mischievous smile that contrasted with Diluc’s scowl. “Besides, you have to admit that company does lighten the mood of this place. It’s so… melancholy. It seems like someone here is carrying a lot of grief.”
Diluc’s eyes narrowed, but he didn’t bite at the provocation. He slung the cloth over his shoulder and grabbed a fresh bottle of wine to organize the shelves, turning his attention back to his work. “If you think this place is gloomy, maybe you shouldn’t be here. I’m sure Jean or Albedo would love to hear your unnecessary comments elsewhere.”
“But neither of them have that hair,” [Name] replied, plucking an imaginary strand out of the air and twirling his fingers theatrically. “You know, you could use a little more lightheartedness. Maybe I should bring you some sweets next time. Something that matches your hidden charm.”
“I don’t need a lightheartedness, and certainly not your sweets scattered all over the counter,” Diluc retorted, finally turning to face him. “Why are you really here, [Name]? It can’t be just to tease me.”
[Name]’s expression changed for a moment, the playful smile softening. “Maybe I enjoy your company, Diluc. It’s refreshing to see someone so… genuine. No matter how grumpy they are.”
Diluc was silent for a few seconds, his red eyes fixed on the you. He sighed, as if admitting a silent defeat, and went back to work. "Do whatever you want. Just don't leave any more crumbs on my counter."
[Name] laughed, leaning forward to support him with her elbows. "I knew that deep down you like me, redhead. You just don't know how to admit it."
"In your dreams..." Diluc replied, but the corner of his mouth almost threatened to form a smile.
You're honestly annoying. But he likes you. But he doesn't admit it.
"You really don't talk much, do you?" [Name] commented, leaning forward a little. "But that's okay, I'm good enough for two." Your voice was filled with a confidence that didn't go unnoticed.
"I'm also the type who doesn't have the patience for a long silence. In my world, being the strongest is something that comes naturally. No one dares to doubt that, and I can assure you that my power is something... unquestionable."
“You talk too much.” Xiao finally replied, his voice low and somewhat harsh, as natural of his voice. “And yet… you have no idea what it means to truly carry the weight of eternity.” He pause. “I am a Yaksha, you know. We are more than just strength.”
"You have this aura of mystery, this... silence one. I'm very good at noticing details. And you, my friend, are full of them." You say, your tone naturally laden with arrogance, but Xiao sharpens his eyes.
"Very presumptuous for someone young." Xiao says, but shakes his head in the end.
It may not seem like it, but he is not bothered by your presence.
You tend to talk a lot, he honestly doesn't mind. It may seem like he's not listening, but he is.
He cares about you. Even though you keep saying that you are the strongest in your world. He wasn't around to see your displays of power, so he doesn't believe it.
He knows your arrogance will get you into trouble. That's why he's always around.
“Thoma, it’s been a while!” [Name] exclaimed with a wide smile, your eyes shining with amusement as you saw Thoma’s blond head in the distance at the shop where the Kamisato Clan’s caretaker was buying some items for the day.
Your voice echoed through the street, carrying an unmistakable confidence, as if you had just met an old friend after a long period of absence.
Thoma, who had been distracted by picking out some ingredients for dinner, looked up quickly, immediately recognizing [Name]’s presence. He smiled back, his expression friendly and relaxed, his eyes sparkling with a hint of humor.
“Oh, ah! [Name]!” he exclaimed, raising one of his hands in greeting. He took a step towards [Name], with his usual welcoming smile.
"How have you been, Thoma?" [Name] asked with a mischievous smile. "Continuing your mission to solve all the problems in Inazuma, as always?"
Thoma, for his part, chuckled softly, leaning forward slightly, his eyes shining with amusement. “I try. But what about you? How’s life in Teyvat? Still enjoying your… ‘games’?” Thoma’s tone was friendly, in no rush to get serious about any conversation, but it was also a bit teasing. He knew [Name] had a tendency to make fun of situations and people, though he could also tell that behind that arrogance was something else, something more human.
“Ah, you know… Life is much more interesting when you can joke around with others. I can’t help but be amused by the situations you and your Kamisato Clan get yourselves into.”
Thoma laughed, his smile now wider, he had grown accustomed to this dynamic of teasing and teasing between them. "I know, I know. But if you need help with any problems, you know where to find me."
"I know," [Name] replied, smile turning into a more relaxed expression, but still with a glint of mischief in the eyes. "I just hope you don't get into too much trouble with your duties. I don't want you to be too busy to help me when I need it."
You two act like you've known each other for ages. It honestly surprises everyone around.
Thoma cares about you just like Xiao does, but he personally believes that you are capable of handling yourself even without ever seeing your displays of power.
You've known each other for a long time. A really long time. Like, since birth.
Aether knows you like the back of his hand. Your family has always been rich and famous in the world you came from, your clan being the largest. Yet, you know the twins by literally sneaking them into your house.
"Come on, come up!" A child [Name] insists at the small window of your room. Aether was crouched on the lawn and whimpered.
"I can’t do it! It's too high!" Aether says.
"Ugh, you crybaby!" [Name] grumbles.
You then start to rummage through your room looking for something. You grab a stool, quickly climbing onto it and leaning against the window. "Give me your hand."
"U-Uhh, but what if I fall??" Aether says hesitantly.
"Hurry up!"
Even though he was scared, Aether closed his eyes tightly and grabbed [Name]'s hand.
"I won't let go. I'll never let go." [Name]'s words made Aether open his eyes, seeing those deep vibrant blue eyes, and a smile. Not malicious like usual, but honest. "See? You don't have to be afraid of anything."
You didn't really let go of him. You never let go of him.
And he couldn't be happier about it.
You two will find Lumine. And you all will go home, together.
“Tsk, this is ridiculous.” [Name]’s voice was cold, but filled with a quiet anger that made even Lumine feel uncomfortable.
You had always been the type of person to keep himself in control, but when your emotions boiled over, it was clear how unpredictable you could be. Lumine watched as your made impatient gestures, she can count on one hand the times she's seen you so upset.
“That fatui trash thinks he can mess with you? Good news, he CANNOT,” [Name] continued, voice a bit louder than usual, revealing a fierce anger that rarely displayed.
You was referring to Tartaglia, who had tried to approach Lumine with a sly smile, his intentions veiled, as always. Lumine didn’t respond right away.
She leaned forward a little, looking at him with a surprised expression.
“Why are you so upset about this?” she asked.
“Because no one has the right to treat you that way,” you said, still carrying an inner strength that could not be ignored. “I will not allow some piece of weak trash to think he can do whatever he wants.”
“You really need to stop getting so angry over that small thing.” Lumine says, but quickly shakes her head. "I can take care of myself, you know."
“I know you can defend yourself, Lumine, but sometimes the world needs to remember who’s really in control.” [Nome] spoke with renewed confidence, but this time it was more of a statement than a threat.
"You don't have to worry, [Name]. I can take care of myself." Lumine said in a soft but firm tone.
[Name] watched her for a moment, and for a brief second, the gaze softened. "I know, Lumine. I know." You finally murmured.
Like, yeah. No one messes with the ones you care about.
#genshin impact x reader#xiao x reader#aether x reader#lumine x reader#genshin impact lisa x reader#lisa x reader#thoma x reader#scaramouche x reader#wanderer x reader#diluc x reader#genshin impact imagine#genshin impact x you#genshin impact xiao#genshin impact thoma#genshin impact lisa
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I was so tired yesterday I knew if I read it I wouldn’t do it justice, so had to wait till I was better rested.
I feel like this was a theme for all of us before the summer. I felt that comment in my tired bones 😂 Hope all's good with you, though! Missed ya a lot, friend 🤍
“Out of the two of us, you’re the way bigger wreck. Some would even think it’s your husband who died, not mine.” broke me
I'm glad it broke you! I was rather proud of that line 😂 Plus, I think she made a great point for Beau lol
I love Beau asking about the dating, and doing it about face as soon as he realizes other guys have made inquiries.
Haha yes! Beau was hearing that and going, "Dammit! And here I thought I was being an honorable gentleman by giving her time to grieve. Meanwhile, these cockroaches are already hitting on her like damn vultures! Her husband's body ain't even cold yet..." 😂
And the vibrator line – Quinn got apology cookies for the laugh that I cackled out and woke him!
Oh, she definitely was pushing boundaries there 🤣 And yay, cookies for Quinn!!! 🍪
I know it was meant to be sweet, but very, very bittersweet – beautiful!
Ooof, right? Part of what I loved writing about this series were these really tragic moments between them. There's always this "wrong place, wrong time" dangling in the air and tons of "what ifs". Well, hopefully the stars align for them... 😉
And BTW, you have the paragraph
Ah, thanks!!! That one got away from me. Finally corrected it after months... 😂🙈
I swear to the Gods, when I read “He was making up for lost time as best as he could, even if it meant taking you out every night for the rest of your life.” the next thing I heard in my head was “ because he doesn’t have much time left to do it,” and that stopped me cold. Foreshadowing, or too much Dateline – I’m not sure. But it gave me chills.)
Ooop, we'll see where this story leads... Might not be death that will haunt her and cause a rift 👀 (Or maybe it will 🤷♀️)
Quoting all these lines back to me? You're making my writer heart soar, woman! 😍❤️❤️❤️ (On a side note, I really loved the metaphor with the cassette tape. He really is her B-side 🥰)
“Not at all, Sheriff. You know I always appreciate your input,” (that double entendre got Quinn another cookie!)
I imagine Jenny internally also snorted pretty hard at that one 😂
And man, you ended on kind of an ominous note… I’ve got a real bad feeling. Whatever happens, at least they have that soft moment between them.
Yup, let's hope it won't be the last! 🤞
Polaris – Chapter 7
Series Summary: When Beau Arlen moved to Montana, he left behind a past he wasn’t proud of. But when a series of murders requires the FBI’s help, Sheriff Arlen‘s ghosts come back to haunt him one by one. With a wrong turn waiting at every crossroads, it’s hard to make the right choices and find his way back home – back to you.
Pairing: Beau Arlen x FBI Agent!Reader
Warnings: 18+, fluff, angst, serial killer, mentions of cartels, grief, smut
Word Count: 7.2k
A/N: The chapter where we find out why Ted is on Beau's punch list aka The One With Ted... 😂
Series Masterlist || Main Masterlist || Tag List
Chapter 7: Storm Coming
May 2021
“I sold the house,” you said, your voice ripping through the quiet of the car during another starry stake-out night.
“So you’re homeless now?” Beau joked and peeled his eyes away from the front window view and glanced at you from the driver’s seat, his hand resting on the steering wheel, the other one in his lap.
You chuckled. “Yup, but I got a hot plate now in my motel room and one of those Italian moka pots. So, you know, some would say I’m living the dream.”
Beau snorted in amusement before he pensively rubbed his mouth with two fingers. “You didn’t have to sell the house, you know?”
You heaved a sigh. “Yeah, I kinda did, though… I didn’t like staying in there anymore. It’s just… too many memories, I guess? ‘Sides, I’m always down here anyways. Actually considering moving here.”
Beau frowned at you, his nose scrunching. “What, to Mexico? Are you nuts? Over my dead body are you doin’ that.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you had a say in it,” you retorted rather playfully and put a shocked palm on your chest in mock.
“Damn right, I do,” Beau scoffed his reply with a teasing grin. “Who do you think is lookin’ out for ya, huh?”
“Wait, you think you are? That’s what you believe?” You snorted a laugh, entering banter territory with him.
It was usually how you passed your time during most of these stake-outs – laughing, teasing, and the occasional talking about your problems. You’d never known Beau like this before. He was your husband’s best friend, but he had been more of an acquaintance to you. Now, after months of spending close to every day together, it felt like he was your best friend. Since Randy’s death, he’d been there for you, even if it was mostly out of guilt.
“Yeah, what d’you think?” Beau countered challengingly.
“Oh sweetie, you’re not looking after me. I’m looking after you,” you stated confidently. The smile that twitched on his lips seemed to actually agree with you. “Out of the two of us, you’re the way bigger wreck. Some would even think it’s your husband who died, not mine.”
“Are you calling me a girl?”
You coolly shrugged your shoulders. “Either I’m calling you a girl, or I’m calling you gay. I’ll let you pick.”
Laughingly, Beau scoffed and muttered, “You wish I was gay.”
However, you still heard his mumbled reply and responded, “Actually, I wish you were a girl and that I was gay.”
Beau stared at you and leaned back against the door for a better view of you, his brow raised and the corners of his lips drawn slightly upwards in amusement. “What are we even talking about?”
“I don’t know,” you admitted with a shake of your head.
The two of you then burst into loud laughter that filled the entire SUV. For a moment, all your sorrows and hardships seemed to be forgotten, carried away to the desert with the nightly breeze. Then, the familiar and comfortable quiet took over the car again.
“I’m moving out of the house, too,” Beau said, his eyes focusing on the barren landscape and desolate road ahead. “I’m giving it to Carla. I mean, she didn’t ask me to. God knows she can take care of herself… But I want Emily to keep living in the home she grew up in, you know?”
“Yeah, I get that. That’s really nice,” you said quietly. Your soft smile then morphed to a grin. “So you’re homeless, too, huh?”
Beau laughed, throwing his head back into the seat. “Yeah, guess I am. Maybe we should live together?” he suggested half-jokingly.
“Like roommates? Ugh, God no!” You scoffed in abhorrence. “We’re way too old for that. You’re over forty, I’m barely in my thirties–”
“You do know I know exactly how old you really are, right?” Beau teased.
You decided to ignore that jab and continued, unbothered. “It would be seriously so sad. The Widow And The Divorcee – sounds like the worst sitcom on the planet. ‘Sides, it’d be super awkward if one of us starts dating again.”
“Fine, maybe you’re right,” Beau relented with a soft chuckle and then glanced at you sideways. His heart gained speed in his chest. “You ever think about it? Dating? Gettin’ out there again? Been nine months.”
You twitched your shoulders, choosing not to look at him. “I don’t know. Is nine months long enough after your husband died?”
Thoughtfully, Beau licked his lips and let out a small sigh. “I don’t think there’s a timeline, or a right and wrong. I just think it’s one of those things that when you’re ready, you’re ready.”
“Well, consider me not ready then, I guess,” you replied honestly.
“Alright,” Beau accepted, bobbing his head. “But I still think you should try again at some point, you know? You shouldn’t be alone for the rest of your life. First of all, it’d be a total waste, ‘cause, I mean, look at you. And secondly, you’re barely in your thirties, after all,” he repeated your earlier joke with a soft grin.
You felt the heat creep to your cheeks in the moonlight. As you looked at him, you could see his smirk, making you laugh. “Noted,” you replied and were thankful for his pep talk. “I mean, there’ve been offers.”
Beau quirked one eyebrow, a hard lump forming in his throat as his chest tightened. “Offers? Like plural? Who?”
“Well, just some of the guys from our team. Cody, Jordan, Ted…” you named a few. “Also a few locals. Remember those guys we played pool with a few weeks ago? Two of ‘em asked for my number.”
“Huh. That is plural…” Beau pursed his lips and couldn’t keep his brow from wrinkling, his grip on the steering wheel stiffening. “Well, you know, when you’re not ready, you’re not ready. Shouldn’t force anything. No rush, darlin’.”
Smooth, Beau thought wryly with an internal sigh.
“Right, I know,” you agreed. “I do miss sex, though. Getting kinda bored of my vibrator.”
Beau choked on his spit. “Jesus…”
“What? Am I not allowed to talk about it? I thought we were friends. You’re supposed to care about my well-being and happiness,” you argued, frowning.
“I do care. Just… Can we please not talk about that?” he begged and exhaled a deep breath, pinching the bridge of his freckled nose.
“Fine. I miss having women around…” You shrugged and muttered, “Didn’t peg you for a prude.”
“Okay, let’s just get one thing straight – I’m not a prude,” he clarified in defense, his cheeks turning a deep shade of red.
“Alright, also noted,” you quipped, smirking to yourself. Sometimes you enjoyed making him a little uncomfortable. His blushed cheeks could be quite cute. “What about you? Have you still not talked to Carla? I’m sure you can win her back if you tried. You’re a lot better now.”
“Well, thank you for the, uh, vote of confidence, but it’s really over, I guess. We just talked about all the divorce proceedings last time. I actually think she started datin’ someone recently,” Beau told you.
Your eyebrows rose in surprise. “Really? Who?”
“I guess some rich tech guy. I don’t know…”
“And you’re good with that?” you questioned in disbelief.
Beau scoffed a humorless chuckle, shaking his head. “Ha, no… But what am I gonna do? Kinda shot myself in the leg with that one. I don’t blame her for moving on. It’s been over for months now.”
“That sucks. I’m sorry. I was kinda rooting for you two,” you admitted.
“Well, thanks, but we weren’t you and Randy,” Beau said. It made your brow knit.
“What d’you mean?”
“C’mon, you know what I mean,” Beau replied as if it were obvious, but you still shook your head. He sighed. “You and Randy would’ve never gotten divorced.”
“You don’t know that.” Honestly, you doubted it yourself, but you were too curious to find out what he meant by his statement.
“I do know that,” Beau insisted with certainty. “You guys had that once-in-a-lifetime kinda love. The kind that made other people jealous, you know? Your love made every other relationship pale in comparison. I always figured once the honeymoon phase was over, you’d settle and be less vomit-inducing, but that never happened. Me and Carla were never like that. Not even in the beginning,” he explained, a small, soft smile shaping his mouth. “You guys were special. True love. The stuff folk singers write cheesy songs about.”
“I guess we were,” you mused quietly, the memory of everything Randy was to you causing tears to well in your eyes.
“Hey, I’m sorry,” Beau apologized as soon as he noticed the sadness on your face. He reached his hand over to your side and squeezed your thigh gently, just above the knee.
“No, it’s alright,” you brushed him off, swallowing your heartache down. “But hey, if Carla wasn’t your once-in-a-lifetime, maybe she’s still out there. You just haven’t found her yet. I mean, that’s kinda a nice outlook, right?”
Licking his lips, he bobbed his head, his gaze focused on his hand on the steering wheel. “I doubt it.”
“Why? Never say never,” you said encouragingly.
“Well, maybe I already met her, and it’s too late now,” he replied. It sounded more like an actual fact than a hypothetical theory. You found yourself wondering.
“What, did you have like an old college flame? The one that got away?” you teased lightheartedly, but he only grew more serious.
“Somethin’ like that,” he replied vaguely, rubbing his mouth with his fingers.
“Look her up on Facebook. Maybe she’s divorced, too. You could reconnect or something,” you suggested. He nodded but didn’t seem too convinced. You then shot him a hesitant glance from your periphery. “So, now that Carla’s moving on, are you gonna start dating now, too? Jump back into the game?”
“I guess so… Why?” A part of him was curious to hear your response, while another part reminded him that his desired answer was only wishful thinking – and completely insane on top of that.
“That fiery brunette lady at the bar last night seemed really interested in you. Maybe you should hook up with her if she’s there again tomorrow night?” you proposed in earnest.
Wide-eyed, Beau blinked at you in incredulity – like you had lost your goddamn mind. “I’m sorry, what?! Hook up? Who are you right now? Are you tryin’ to set me up?”
“Yeah.” You shrugged simply, not seeing what the big problem was. “Don’t look at me like I’m trying to convince you to get a tramp stamp above your ass with a dirty needle. I’m just trying to be a good wingman… woman. Randy would’ve tried to set you up, right?”
Beau sighed frustratedly. “Yeah, he would’ve,” he admitted in a grumble and then barked, slightly more furious, “But you ain’t him. And I don’t want you to be, so stop it, alright?”
“Geez, I’m sorry. I was just trying to help,” you mumbled defensively and raised your hands in surrender, unsuccessfully hiding your upset over his reaction. He felt guilty when he saw the small pout on your face.
Beau rubbed his forehead before dragging his palm over the rest of his face. “I know. I’m sorry, too,” he said and let out a deep breath through his nose. “I just-… I guess I’m just waiting, okay?”
“Waiting for what?”
Beau squeezed his eyes shut for a moment. For you to be ready, he wanted to say. But he couldn’t very well do that now, could he?
“For Christ’s sake, Y/N…” he breathed exhaustively. That was all he managed to say. With his palm on his mouth, he rested his elbow against the car door, gazing out the window.
“Why are you so upset?” you asked, your brow woven with confusion.
“Switch subjects,” he requested.
It was a phrase the two of you used whenever you didn’t want to talk about something anymore. When someone pushed too much, or the topic got too emotional and you needed a break. The only rule was to always respect the request, so you had no choice but to let it go after that.
“The Texans game sucked last night, huh?”
That elicited a snort from him, and he looked at you with a warm smile. “Yeah, goddamn awful.”
“How many times are you gonna watch those?”
Beau’s question broke your concentration. Your gaze snapped from your laptop screen to his concerned face. You’d been rewatching the victims’ videos for four days straight now, trying to find more clues. Maybe even something that directly led to Diane.
“I keep thinking maybe I’ve missed something,” you mumbled and stared back into the computer, your teeth gnawing on the pen between your lips. “It’s 48 hours each. We have twenty-four victims. I keep watching them sped-up to get through them all, but maybe I should slow ‘em down. I mean, I’ve watched them full-length, normal speed a couple of times before, but maybe I should watch ‘em even slower and really focus, you know? There’s gotta be something there…”
Bobbing his head worriedly, Beau pursed his lips and took a scan of your desk. He counted eight empty cups of coffee and five cans of energy drinks. There were bags under your red eyes and your hands were jittering. He knew you hadn’t slept a lot. He tried to hold you in his arms, but as soon as he dozed off, you snuck out and went back to work.
Beau shut the laptop. “You’re cut off.”
“Hey!”
“Y/N, you need to sleep. Just look at you, darlin’. This obsession isn’t healthy. I’m taking you home,” he declared sternly, ignoring your protests. You were pretty sure he had used his dad voice, too.
“Y/N, you need to sleep. Just look at you, darlin’. This obsession isn’t healthy. I’m taking you home,” he declared sternly, ignoring your protests. You were pretty sure he had used his dad voice, too.
“I need that woman in prison, Beau.”
“You startin’ to sound like Jenny…” Beau quipped under his breath.
“We’re running out of time. There’s only one day left before the next victim drops,” you stated and tried your best to keep your voice steady as it broke off towards the end.
“I know.” Beau clasped your shoulder and squeezed gently. “And we’ll get her. I promise you. But you’re no good to any of us if you’re exhausted and losing it right now.” You nodded and rose from your chair. He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you flush against him, kissing the top of your head affectionately. “How about some dinner, huh?”
You grinned warmly. “What, like a second date?”
“Exactly like a second date,” Beau said and mirrored your grin. He was making up for lost time as best as he could, even if it meant taking you out every night for the rest of your life.
Your phone buzzed on the table, your brow quirking at the number. Eagerly, you picked up and wound yourself out of Beau’s embrace. “Special Agent Y/L/N… Uh-huh… Great, thank you.”
Beau pursed his lips. “We’re not going out, are we?”
“‘fraid not, Sheriff.” You shook your head and chuckled at his groan. “That was IT. They’re finally done and sending over the IP addresses.”
“Alright, guess I’m gettin’ take out,” Beau announced with a small sigh, knowing the two of you were in for a long night – and not the one he had planned.
You smiled and pecked his lips. “Thank you.”
August 2020
Beau’s heart thudded frantically in his chest as his knuckles tapped your front door in the early evening. The sky was a color spectacle full of azures, indigos, and apricots as the summer sun slowly set. His boots only stood on that same spot not even twenty-four hours ago. It still felt like a surreal nightmare he couldn’t escape, his hope to wake up soon a ceaseless prayer.
He’d stayed with you all night, held you as you cried yourself to sleep. Beau awoke on your couch with your head resting on his thigh and a strange feeling in his gut. He couldn’t help but think you were beautiful, even in a state of utter turmoil, shoving said thought swiftly down into the depths of his darkening soul.
But he’d spent all day thinking of you, plagued by guilt and torn by misplaced feelings. He’d sat through hours of interviews, going over and over the events of last night till his mind spun like a hamster wheel. He was forced to fill out forms, sign documents, and recount each unforgettable step. He’d listened to lectures, sermons, and admonitions. His captain gave him a tongue-lashing that sounded like mere white noise before he was sent home with a suspension – investigation pending.
Only he didn’t go home; he came here.
At home, his wife and daughter were waiting – for a husband, a father, an explanation. None of which he could provide. Beau wanted to wallow in his grief, his guilt, his loss in peace. He lacked the strength to be strong, play pretend, and act above it all. He wanted to be punished, sent to perdition, and held accountable for his lapse of judgment. A suspension wasn’t good enough. It barely patched the abysmal gaps in his heart.
The only suitable punishment was you. Witnessing your suffering was his personally crafted hell. You were the broken remnants of his destruction, the shattered pieces of his idiocy, the explosive fallout of his arrogance.
And you hadn’t answered a single call or text of his. His torturous worry was part of his penalty.
Consecutive rings of the doorbell and incessant knocks remained unanswered. For a moment, Beau rested his forehead on the door. He felt helpless and clueless all the same. You had friends and family to take care of you, probably better suited and closer to you than him, but somehow he felt burdened with the responsibility.
He took the spare key out of the left-side planter and barged inside. The ground floor was deserted. Last night’s uneaten dinner still sat untouched on the table. It felt like a whiplash against his bare back.
Bolting upstairs, he found the door to the main bedroom ajar. He pried it open slowly, the sight of you delivering his second lashing. This time, he felt the sting burning through to his heart.
He found you curled up in bed, on your husband’s side, in your husband’s t-shirt, with your wedding photo album clutched tightly in your arms. His breath halted for a moment; his heart did, too.
Did he do this? Was this all his fault?
“Y/N?” His deep voice was quiet and careful as he spoke. Slowly, he walked over to your side and knelt down in front of you. “Darlin’, hey… You need to get up. Eat somethin’.”
Beau was sure you hadn’t moved all day. He didn’t ask you if you were alright or how you were doing. The question seemed insulting. The answer was obvious. Your phone was lighting up on the nightstand with a million unanswered calls and messages, his own among them. Your beautiful eyes were vacant, red, and empty. You didn’t cry, however, not anymore. You were dehydrated and all out of tears at this point. You never looked at him, not even a glance.
“I want him back,” you whispered, your voice coarse from screaming, crying, cursing.
Beau nodded, licking his lips. Caringly, he caressed your head, brushing a few strands of messy hair out of your face. “I know. I hope you know I’d trade places with him in a heartbeat if I could.”
For the first time your eyes found his. Your gaze was scathing and piercing. “Tell me what happened.”
Beau let out a harrowing sigh. He had rehashed the story all day long. He wasn’t sure if he could do it again, but maybe this version was the most important one. Who deserved the truth more than you?
“Y/N, I don’t think this is such a good idea, darlin’,” Beau tried to reason, mostly for himself. He wanted to hold on a little longer, the idea of you hating him tearing him apart. He wanted to spare himself the additional guilt, the anger, the hurt.
“Tell me or leave.”
Beau closed his eyes and nodded hesitantly. “Okay, alright.” He took a deep breath and settled down on the floor, leaning his back against the wooden bedside table. “We were closing in on that biker gang. Few murders, arms trafficking, drug deals… You know the drill. I’m sure Ra-… he filled you in.”
Not that long ago, Randy had asked you for advise on the case. You gave him your contacts in the DEA and a number to a CI.
“Your DEA guy warned us. Said the gang was working closely with the cartel down in Juárez. But I had my own intel that only a few members were meeting at the Hatcher warehouse in MacGregor. It was supposed to be a small deal. But I figured it could lead to bigger things if we shook ‘em down, you know? But fuckin’ Harper told us no like usual. Refused to give us back-up. Said to pass the case on to the DEA. But Randy and I worked our asses off the last few months to get even this far. We were so close. I didn’t wanna let go… So, I suggested we go in anyways. It was supposed to be only three guys from the gang. I knew if we were smart about it, we could easily take ‘em down, you know?”
You rolled onto your back and propped yourself up on the bed. Shaking your head, you chuckled humorlessly and grabbed the half-empty whiskey bottle from the nightstand. “‘Course you did. It’s not the first time you broke a rule or shit on authority.”
“Yeah, and I was right every single time,” Beau bit. His anger wasn’t geared at you but at himself. He knew he was in the wrong. He flew too close to the sun and got burned. But he still felt the need to defend himself, even if it was unjustified.
His gaze drifted to the dresser and the patch of wall above it, decorated with photographic evidence of yours and his partner’s life together. The wedding, dates, vacations, holidays – it was all there. Beau had watched it all, start to finish. He wished he could rewind the tape and cut off the ending, all so you could have the love of your life back. He didn’t know yet your cassette had a B-side. One that featured him.
“You got fucking lucky, is all,” you scoffed.
“Randy backed me up on it!”
“Of course he did! You’re his fucking partner! He would’ve followed you anywhere if you asked him to,” you snapped, shaking your head. You gulped down some whiskey then and locked your jaw before you met his eyes again with a glare. “And? What happened then, Beau? Was it only three guys?”
“No.” The word was almost inaudible. He shook his head with a harsh swallow. “They were meetin’ with a few cartel members there. My intel never said anything about that. When we were inside and saw what was really going on, it was already too late to get out. They made us, bullets started flyin’… They got a hold of Randy and… shot him.” A tear escaped down his cheek, his throat closing as he tried to choke out the last bit of the story. “I had to leave him there. I barely got out myself. I’m sorry, Y/N. I know this is on me.”
Your lips twitched with a bitter smile. You didn’t look at him, just rubbed your tired eyes. “Damn right it is. Get out.”
“Y/N, please–”
The storm in your eyes made him stop as you met his gaze, his useless apologies becoming stuck in his throat. “I said, get out. I ain’t asking a third time. You’re the reason my husband is dead. You’re the reason I don’t even have a body to bury. So, get the fuck out.” Like a snakebite, your words were targeted, sharp, and venomous.
You finally got out of bed and prodded towards the en-suite bathroom. The truth had been what you needed to switch the fighter inside of you back on. You knew what you wanted to do then and were determined to get it.
“Y/N–”
“Do you know what cartels do to bodies, Beau? To rivals? To law enforcement? ‘Cause I just came back from a job where we found forty-eight decapitated bodies, left to rot inside the walls of a house. Still haven’t found the heads yet. Probably never will,” you told him and stared him dead into his dark green eyes. “Ever seen that before, desperado?”
Beau bit his lips, averting his gaze. “No.”
“Yeah, didn’t think so.” You scoffed and crossed your arms over your chest. “Now, leave. Please. Get the fuck outta my house. I don’t wanna see you anymore,” you spat and slammed the bathroom door shut behind you.
Beau then grabbed the whiskey bottle you’d left and walked out of your home. It was the first of many nights he started to drink himself to sleep, but at least it kept the nightmares temporarily at bay.
“Theodore.” Beau forced a bright smile onto his freckle-dusted face, although the stiff features could barely fool anyone. At least, they wouldn’t have fooled you.
“Beau, good to see you again.” Ted smiled and did a more convincing job of it as he waltzed into Lewis and Clark County’s Sheriff’s Department. It almost seemed like he meant it. “I was surprised when Y/N told me you got a gig as a sheriff here.”
Translation: I was surprised because you were such a fuck-up back in Texas.
Beau feigned a chuckle. “Yeah, I bet you were.”
“Hopefully, you’re givin’ the DAs here less headaches,” Ted jabbed under the disguise of friendly banter. He then turned to Jenny with that same shit-eating grin. “Your sheriff is a little troublemaker.”
Sweet Lord, Beau wanted to whack the bastard.
The blonde deputy coolly brushed the accusation off. She shrugged and playfully nudged Beau’s arm, sending the Texan attorney a smile. “I prefer him that way.”
“Hey, there she is!” Beau smiled with frazzled relief when you finally hurried into the station. A little while longer, and he definitely would’ve thrown a punch.
“Hey, Ted. Thanks for coming. How was your flight?” You greeted him with a warm smile and a quick hug.
“Good, good. Never been to Montana before,” Ted said and then let his eyes wander up and down your body. “Look at you. You look great!”
“Oh, uh, thanks.” You subtly cleared your throat. You could physically feel Beau stiffen next to you. In your periphery, you could spy a tightly clenched jaw and a few strained muscles in his neck.
“Mind if Y/N and I borrow your office, Sheriff Arlen?” Ted asked and emphasized his title. “Considering the nature of this case, I’d like to keep it as private as possible. Don’t want anything to reach Ms. Newton’s ears.”
Your hunch had been right. Several IP addresses pointed to Diane, some to public Wi-Fi’s. You and the team still needed to connect her to the other states and find out where she’d been staying there, but you could definitely trace some posts in recent weeks to her home in Montana. It was enough for an arrest warrant, but you still needed more evidence.
Additionally, it had all come together a little too easily. It seemed like a giant trap you were walking into. Diane wanted to be caught. But why?
“Why don’t I just join you? I’m sure Y/N here doesn’t mind,” Beau suggested with a tight smile and then snaked his arm around your middle, pulling you closer. “Ain’t that right, darlin’?”
Internally, you sighed a little at his obvious territorial pissing, but you were willing to throw him a bone. You stretched up and claimed his plump lips in a fervent kiss that Beau only all too happily reciprocated.
“Not at all, Sheriff. You know I always appreciate your input,” you replied with a dirty smirk at the double entendre.
As Beau looked down at you, he mouthed ‘God, I love you.’ You grinned in response.
“Happy to give it to you,” he said with another sweet peck of your lips. A triumphant and slightly cocky grin graced his lips as he looked back at Ted.
“Oh, so you two are back together?” Ted realized, his brow rising to his hairline. He’d never seen you two together but certainly had heard the whispers down in Mexico from your old task force. He’d been the DA for those cases as well. You’d never explicitly told him about you and Beau, though, even when he had tried to pry a little on those dates you went on.
“Well, I’m a hard one to quit,” Beau quipped almost proudly, like a peacock showing off his fan of feathers.
“As are cigarettes and many other vices,” Ted shot back with the same stupidly proud grin.
Translation: You’re an ass. And a failure. She deserves so much better. I’m ‘better.’ But maybe that didn't need a translation.
Beau should’ve known it was hard to out-argue a lawyer and ground his jaw. After all, he’d been married to one for many years.
You, on the other hand, shared a wide-eyed and baffled look with Jenny that bordered on amusement. You had almost gasped in shock. You hadn’t expected such a fiery reply, sure the men would stick to their Southern manners. But, oh well, everyone’s packing in fucking Texas…
“Why don’t you two go ahead? I’ll join you in a minute,” you ordered more than you earnestly proposed and shooed the two men down the hallway towards Beau’s office.
“Sure it’s such a good idea to lock those two in a room alone?” Jenny teased, her eyes lingering a little too long on Ted’s perfectly formed ass as he sauntered down the hall.
You couldn’t blame her. You had checked out Beau’s in the same breath.
“It’s only for a short time. They’re not gonna kill each other,” you laughed it off. Jenny arched a doubtful eyebrow at you. “That quickly,” you added a correction. “So, what did I miss here?” you asked and nodded towards the two men, closing the door to Beau’s office behind them. All you heard last was them talking about the recent Texans game.
Ugh, of course, they’d end up by football…
“Dick measuring contest,” Jenny supplied wryly.
“Ah, figured…”
“Well, better them than to lock Agent Y/L/N and the sheriff into the same room,” Poppernak joked with a soft chuckle as he appeared next to you and Jenny, chiming into the conversation.
You gaped at him in mock-shock. “Mo! I can’t believe you just said that,” you chided playfully.
His cheeks turned crimson red. “I’m sorry, Special Agent Y/L/N,” he apologized in a fluster.
“Mo, I told you to call me by my first name,” you reminded him with a smile. “Or I’m gonna have to start giving you silly names like Beau does.”
“Oh, I love Sheriff Arlen’s nicknames,” he quickly defended with a nervous laugh.
“Do you?” Jenny tilted her head with a questioning eyebrow.
He shrugged. “They’re clever.”
August 2020
“Old Fashioned,” you ordered with a look at the bartender, feeling Beau’s confused eyes and crinkled brow wander up to you. “Couldn’t have picked a nicer bar, huh? This place is a dump. You know that, right?”
Beau clicked his tongue and took a sip from his Ranch Water. “What are you doing here? Thought you never wanted to see me again.”
You let out a small sigh but didn’t meet his gaze. “Carla called me. Your family is worried about you.”
“I didn’t tell her where I was. How did you know I was here?”
“I didn’t. Carla said you haven’t been home in three days. Figured you’d gone on a bender. This is the fifth cop bar I checked out. Finally got lucky,” you said and thanked the bartender as he placed his drink in front of you. You settled down on a barstool next to Beau.
“Quite the effort. Sure I’m worth it?”
Your tongue swept over your lips. “Beau, look at me.” His forest-green eyes found yours upon your soft plea. “I’m sorry I put all that shit on you. It wasn’t fair. It’s not your fault, okay? His death isn’t on you. I know you loved him like a brother.”
“I did.” Beau took another sip of his drink. “But it is my fault. I was reckless and arrogant. We both know it.”
“It was a set-up, alright? I talked to my DEA contact. Cody said your intel was wrong. They knew you and Randy were closing in on them. They wanted to get rid of you,” you explained.
Beau smacked his lips. “I still shoulda known better. I should’ve seen it was a trap.”
“Maybe,” you admitted. You couldn’t say you would’ve done the same thing, but you knew Beau would’ve never purposely put Randy in danger if he had even the faintest idea. “But it could’ve happened to anybody. This was bigger than you knew.”
“It wouldn’t have happened to you,” he stated quietly. You couldn’t argue with that. You were more by-the-book than he was. You would’ve never gone against a superior’s order. You would’ve respected it.
“Look, just go home. Talk to your wife. Get some help,” you said. “You missed your suspension hearing, but I spoke on your behalf. Told them it wasn’t your fault. The DEA backed me. Harper’s gonna reinstate you. Just come back as soon as you’re ready.”
Beau nodded slowly. Even if he didn’t say it, you could tell he was thankful for your efforts. “I can’t go home.”
Your brow furrowed. “Why? I’m sure Carla will understand. You need to talk to someone about this. Go to therapy – and not the alcoholic kind. Losing a partner is not something you get over quickly. You need people in your corner, including your wife.”
“You mean the wife that lets criminals out on the street?” Beau’s gaze was focused on the glass in his hands. The wrinkles on your brow deepened. “The guy that shot him… Carla’s his defense attorney. Was, at least. He was supposed to do time, but two months ago, she got him paroled.” With a dark chuckle, he emptied his glass.
“Beau…” You knew he had always struggled with Carla’s job, making you sometimes wonder about their dinner conversations at home. “It ain’t her fault more than it is yours. She’s just doing her job. You know that. You’ve been together for so long, you’d think you’re used to it by now.”
Beau scoffed a chuckle and gestured to the bartender for a refill. “I was a young cop back then. Wasn’t on the job as long. I didn’t know it would bother me so much. Still lived in that hopeful bubble, I guess.”
You smiled knowingly. “You mean the ‘I didn’t think I’d see as much shit and injustice as I do now’ bubble?”
He snickered softly. “Yep, that one. Just didn’t think it’d be this hard, you know?”
“I get it. I mean, me and Carla butt heads all the time over this stuff. But we do it in a competitive fun way and then get drunk,” you said with a light chuckle. “Guess it’s different when you’re married, though, huh?”
“Yeah, it is…” he sighed.
“Still, go home. Talk to her,” you encouraged but could see your words of wisdom fell on deaf ears. “By the way, the funeral’s on Saturday.”
He turned his gaze away from his glass and found your eyes. “You need any help with that?”
“Maybe you can give a eulogy. You knew him best. I think he would’ve really liked that,” you said with a warm smile. No matter your own feelings, you knew deep down Randy would’ve wanted you to forgive his partner.
“Yeah, I can do that. Anything you need, okay?” Beau clasped your hand that laid on the bar counter and squeezed reassuringly before dropping it again.
You smiled appreciatively and teased, “Maybe show up sober. Or at least close-to.”
Beau chuckled a little. “I promise.”
You stood up from your seat then and put some cash for your drink on the counter. “Alright, I’m heading home. You need me to call you a cab?”
“Nah, I’m good. I’m just gonna finish this drink, then I’ll head out, too,” he said.
“You sure? Don’t make me come back here,” you threatened playfully.
Beau laughed softly. “I won’t. Thanks for everything, Y/N. I mean it.”
You sent him a smile and gave his shoulder a squeeze on your way out. “You’re welcome. Get home safe, okay?”
However, Beau couldn’t keep any of his promises. He made it home after three more drinks and woke up on the front lawn of his house. Carla wasn’t happy when she found him in the morning as she brought Emily to school. But Beau couldn’t stop. Every time he closed his eyes, the tragic events flashed before him like a horror movie, witnessing Randy’s death in a never-ending loop. He kept seeing his partner get dragged away, heard the shot over and over again like a rain of bullets without a ceasefire.
The guilt was eating him alive. The guilt of getting his partner into this mess in the first place. Of leaving him behind. Of surviving and coming out alive when he didn’t deserve to.
So, Beau kept drinking to forget, even though he knew it was a futile endeavor. The memory would never fade, but at least it was blurred.
Your heavy breaths echoed through the small trailer. His mouth moved down the column of your throat, leaving a wet path of ravenous love bites in its wake.
“Fuck, baby,” you moaned wantonly, his grip on your flesh punishing as he kept you pressed flush against him while he devoured you on the little dining table. Your ass sat on the wooden surface, your crossed ankles locked tightly behind his muscular back.
“God, you made me so happy today,” he growled against the shell of your ear, his rising length rubbing against your core through layers of denim.
“I can see that.” You giggled, your hands dangling in his hair. “There’s no need to hate him so much, you know?”
“Says you,” Beau quipped and unzipped your jeans, eagerly pulling them off you as his mouth sucked your clavicle purple and blue. “That slimy coyote always had it out for me.”
Beau removed your panties as well, tossing them behind his shoulder where they landed in the kitchen sink. “Whoops.” He grinned charmingly but was unstoppable, freeing his throbbing dick as he shoved his jeans and boxers barely over his ass. He didn’t bother to slip out of them all the way, too impatient to wait any longer to enter you.
“Still, I’m already yours. I’ve always been yours,” you said and braced yourself on his broad shoulders as one large hand on your back pulled you closer to the edge of the table. His other hand grabbed his cock, twisting his fist along the hard, long shaft a few times before he glided his cockhead through your slick folds.
“Not always.” With one harsh thrust, he pushed inside you, your tight walls fighting to make room for him and adjust to his stretch.
You gasped at the pleasurable burn that coursed through your body and ignited every sizzling nerve. He dropped his head to your shoulder, giving both of you some time to get used to each other. You could tell you were in for a wilder ride tonight. You always loved when he fucked you rough and hard. There was something raw and animalistic about the need in his hypnotizing green eyes.
Beau then claimed your lips with one fervent kiss, enough of a spark to cause a wildfire. He met your gaze, hands gingerly cupping your cheeks. “But I love that you’re mine now. And I’m sure as hell gonna make you mine tonight, darlin’.”
You crashed your lips against his, your kisses frenzied and untamed as his hips began to slam into you. His pounds into your pussy were relentless as you swallowed every inch of him. You gripped him tight, already feeling your first orgasm bloom. It accumulated like dark, violent storm clouds on the horizon, forecasting roaring thunder and heavy rainfall.
“Oh God! Fuck, baby!” You screamed as your climax tore through you like a hurricane, your cunt gushing on his cock and pulsing around him. Your nails dug into his shoulder blades and scratched down his back as you came undone.
Beau groaned into your ear, squeezing his eyes shut as he barely held on himself. But he didn’t let up and kept up his furious pace, not ready to stop yet. “Shit, keep doing that. You’re so fucking tight, Y/N,” he grunted against your skin, your sensitive flesh barely withstanding his ruthless pumps. “Want you to come again, darlin’.”
With his declaration, his hand slipped between your sweat-clad bodies. You came close to losing your mind as he thumbed furiously at your clit, the stars already starting to twinkle in front of your eyes. You could feel yourself get shoved to the edge once more, staring down the steep cliffs of white-hot ecstasy.
Your mind was consumed by need, his grip on your hips bruising as you exploded. You cried out raucously, your whole body quaking in his hold upon your eruption, the aftershocks so powerful they could cause cracks in your bones.
Beau spilled his seed deep inside of you, his body stuttering in rhythm with yours as your earthquake took him down with you. Hazy gazes met each other with lazy smiles as ragged breaths mingled.
“Fuck, that was good. I think that one might make it into our Top Ten.” Beau chuckled gravelly and placed a gentle kiss on your temple.
“Hmm, not sure. We have a few greatest hits.” You giggled and bit down on your lower lip with a mischievous twinkle in your eyes. “Can I tell you something?”
Beau cupped your cheeks, thumbs caressing the heated and rosy skin as he lifted your gaze. “Anything.”
“Just between us, you’re the best lover I ever had,” you confessed with a wide grin. The corners of his mouth rose to match yours.
“Well, between us, I’ve never loved anyone like I love you. You’re it, darlin’. You know that, right? You’re the love of my life,” Beau revealed, making you smile brighter than you ever had before.
“I’m not sure about the sex, but this moment, right here, is probably gonna make it into the Top Ten,” you said softly as a few tears stung your eyes.
“Good.” Beau smiled and pecked your forehead.
The buzzing of a phone shifted your attention. You recognized it as yours, and Beau was quick to retrieve it from your jeans pocket in the pile of clothes on the floor.
“It’s Jenny,” you told him before picking up. “Hello… What?! Uh-huh, we’ll be right there.”
Beau’s brow furrowed as he watched your features flicker through an array of emotions. “Bad news?”
“Uhm, honestly, I don’t know,” you said and swallowed some of your confusion down, gathering your thoughts. “Jenny said Diane just walked into the station and gave herself up. She is ready to confess but only wants to talk to us.”
“Us? As in us two?” Beau’s eyes narrowed. You nodded. “Well, that doesn’t sound fishy at all,” he commented wryly.
“Yup, I don’t like it.”
Chapter 8: Chemical Bonds – JUNE 26
A lot of revelations and foreboding in this one... 👀 Also, I just love having Beau say the word "coyotes" for some reason 😂
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A Better Man, Part 10 - Walkthrough
Summary: A year later two momentous occasions are pending. First, the three partners of Shield Renovations await the dropping of all charges against them. Secondly, there is a wedding soon to happen.
Length: 4.7 K
Characters: Bucky, Steve, Sam, Winnifred, Andrea, Lily, Natasha, Bruce.
Warnings: Fluffy fluff with a final touch of anxiety from Bucky.
Author notes: I hope you liked this mostly sweet story of a shy man falling for the right woman. Although there was some darkness, it also showed Bucky’s qualities that made him the better man.
<<Part 9
Part 10
One year later
The three partners sat in Bucky's office late on a Friday afternoon, waiting nervously. The courier was supposed to bring the confirmation directly to them but according to Hope Van Dyne, he had left the District Attorney's office well over an hour ago.
"Maybe he got into an accident," said Sam, cracking his knuckles and getting glares from his two friends at the sounds. "Well, why else would he be late? Don't those guys go all out on their bikes? It's gotta be that or someone trying to stop us getting cleared completely. Pierce could still have people on his payroll."
"You watched that movie again, didn't you?" asked Steve, rolling his eyes. "That Premium Rush one? There are no corrupt cops wanting to screw us over, okay? Both Natasha and Maria said that as far as the NYPD is concerned, we're reformed. They're all rooting for us, plus ever since we did Tom Benson's renovation, he's managed to refer a dozen other clients to us. Our reputation is sterling."
"It will be fine," said Bucky, searching his pockets in vain. He looked at Steve. "Give me some gum, will you?"
He reached into the chest pocket of his Shield Renovations and Construction polo shirt, pulling out a package of gum and handing a strip to Bucky. Another hand appeared in front of him, and he placed one in Sam's hand before taking one himself. Although all three of them gave up smoking, they still needed a substitute vice when they were stressed, and gum was the vice of choice. They sat quietly, chewing away, then the door opened, and Hope came in with a large envelope.
"It's here," she said.
Bucky put his hand out, taking it from her, then she left. At the time he hired her it was because Mrs. Parker said she was swamped but in reality, Hope Van Dyne was her hand-picked choice to replace her. Knowing that the operation was close to being wrapped up, Mrs. Parker had stumbled across the capable administrative assistant on her daily commute, befriending her and offering her consolation over the antics of the younger woman's employer. Even though May Parker contemplated retiring from the FBI to continue working with the company, another undercover assignment was offered to her and she felt compelled to accept it. The last they heard she was working at a private golf club and resort in Florida, keeping an eye on a retired high-level politician who seemed to have a lot of foreign dignitaries visiting him at all hours of the day and night.
"Are you going to open it, or what?" asked Sam, interrupting Bucky's thoughts.
With an irritated glance at his friend, Bucky opened the envelope and pulled out three sheets of paper, handing one each to Sam and Steve. They all read the words on the papers then at each other, slowly smiling.
"We're good," said Sam. "Fury has come through. We're completely legit!"
"We can travel," said Bucky. "I was worried that it wouldn't come through before the wedding and we couldn't go on our honeymoon."
"I can propose now," said Steve, then he blushed.
"Wait, what? You're proposing to Natasha? Does she know? Maria never said anything about a proposal."
"Of course, she doesn't know," answered Steve, pushing Sam in the arm. "Dumbass. It's a proposal. It's supposed to be a surprise."
Sam rubbed his arm, then grinned, offering his hand to Steve. "Congratulations, man. She had you wrapped around her finger from the very start."
"She did not. What about you and Maria? You wanted her to move in within a month."
"Did not. Her lease was ending, and I was being nice."
Bucky watched and listened to their bickering, then crumpled up a post-it note and threw it at Steve. His two friends stopped talking, switching their attention to him.
"Now that we have our confirmation that the charges are all dropped and expunged, I'm going home," he said, standing up. "I'm going to hug my daughter, read her a story and tuck her in, then take my almost wife to bed."
"You can't," said Steve. He ran his hand through his hair. "You're coming out with us for your stag. It's all arranged. Andrea knows that you'll probably crash with me tonight."
"Guys ... I didn't want one."
"I know, but the troops did and a good general always supports his troops. Just so you know, we're meeting at a sports bar that has twenty different burgers, a hundred different beers, and games galore. No strippers, no hookers, nothing that you or we would ever be ashamed of." He gestured at Bucky's company shirt. "I have something for you to change into."
He left, coming back with one of Bucky's favourite shirts. With a sigh, Bucky changed, while Steve and Sam changed theirs. They locked up, since Hope had already left, and headed to where they could hail a taxi. After a short ride they arrived at their destination and made sure that Bucky walked in ahead of them. It was full of every guy who worked for them, including Thor, and Peter Quill. A beer was put into Bucky's hands, then Steve stood on a chair, holding his beer up.
"In a week, Bucky gets married to Andrea, a woman that stole his heart from the first moment he saw her. Sam and I met her two weeks before, quite by accident as she was taking her baby girl, Lily, out for a walk. We were having a smoke break, and this breath of fresh air approached us, then stopped, smiled, and asked where the nearest park was. Sam, being the smooth operator he was, asked about Lily, then gave Andrea advice about child raising, based on his experiences as uncle to his sister's two boys. She thanked him and walked away, leaving us feeling a little colder and in the dark without her presence. Two weeks after that, Bucky joined us, and it was like a light went on in his head and his heart. Those of you who witnessed this special time knew that he was a changed man. In his opinion, he's become a better man since then. To our better man, Bucky Barnes."
They all repeated it and drank to him. He smiled shyly and looked at all of them.
"After my surgery, we decided to change the name of Barnes Contracting to something new. It was Andrea who suggested Shield Renovations and Construction. She said the shield would represent protection, something that she felt with us. She told me of how you all waited at the hospital during my surgery and told stories about us, about how we gave you all a second chance to be better men. Obviously, you all wanted it, because you bought into our limited scope of operations and when we went legitimate you stayed with us. We wouldn't be where we are today without you all. Thank you for believing in us and in yourselves. We're only as good as the people who work for us, and right now, I think we have the best of men as our employees."
He drank more of his beer, then received many handshakes and shoulder squeezes from everyone as they began to party. For several hours Bucky nursed his beers, drinking only three in total. After making sure Steve and Sam got home okay, he took a taxi to the brownstone and paid the driver, looking up at the building in the dark. He sat on the top step and opened his phone, flipping through the gallery of photos he took of the renovation, finished seven months before. In many ways it was a record of the second part of his and Andrea's relationship. The job became a labour of love as he steered the renovation alongside her, making sure she was involved in all the aspects of doing it right, the first time.
Everything new had to be done to last a lifetime, and everything old that he kept from the original had to be restored to the highest quality. When the project was finished, and they took the walkthrough together before moving her furniture back, she turned to him.
"You are moving in with me, right?" she asked. "This is all so beautiful, that you must have done some of it for yourself."
"It was all for you, but I am moving in with you," he replied. "My apartment was what I thought Dot wanted, and I stayed there because it cost a lot. It was more of a home with you and Lily there but this is the home I want to live the rest of my life in."
He placed his hand casually in his pocket, feeling the edge of the ring box, then drew it out, when her back was turned as she opened the butler's pantry door and went inside. When she came out, he was down on one knee, with the box opened towards her, and she gasped in surprise.
"Will you marry me? Will you stand with this former criminal and keep me on the good path that I've tried to stay on since I met you? Will you let me be Lily's father in name and not just practice?"
"Yes, yes, and yes," she replied without hesitation. "I'll marry you. The path is wide enough that you'll never fall off, not with me at your side. As for Lily, Brock has given up his rights to her. He never wanted her, except for the money she would bring him."
As he slid the vintage engagement ring onto her ring finger, he gazed at her face, then stood up. When she looked up at him, he saw only love, something he never saw with Dot. That was the night they made love for the first time, a perfect melding of hearts, souls, and flesh that made his dick thicken as he thought of it. Even though they picked up their relationship from where they left off, he didn't push Andrea into anything she wasn't ready for. Some of their make out sessions became steamy but, in his heart, Bucky knew they would be together in every way when the time was right. Waiting just made their first time incredibly special.
The selfie of them in the kitchen with her showing off her engagement ring was the last of the renovation pictures. Sighing as he closed the gallery Bucky thought of when he sold his apartment condo, paid his mother back for the renovations and invested the rest, including starting up a college fund for Lily. In the seven months they had shared the brownstone he lived as he always wanted, without worry and fear of the law coming after him, with someone he loved more than anything.
Standing up, he entered the code on the door panel, closing and locking the door behind him. Slipping his shoes off, he hung up his jacket in the closet and made his way up to the second floor. Checking in on Lily first, he grinned at how she was sprawled out in her "big girl" bed. At 19 months she was walking and talking, and still just as friendly to almost everyone she met. The guys at the warehouse loved seeing her whenever Andrea stopped by. It was hilarious watching a bunch of grown men trying to entertain her by making goofy faces and sounds to get her attention. She had her favourites; Clint, the father of three who was now their foreman, and Scott, who was in a serious relationship with Hope. He knew magic and could make Lily laugh and clap her hands at his simple tricks. Surprisingly, at least to Bucky, she liked Luis, who was teaching her Spanish, even bringing some Spanish language children's books to the warehouse to read to her whenever she climbed up on his lap. Of course, she had soft spots for her godfathers Sammy and Steeby. Every time they were over at the house, she went from one to the other, scamming them out of candy or money. His mother's love for the little girl was as strong as if she had been related by blood. Nana always got hugs and kisses, giving them back in turn. If only Andrea's parents saw her more, it would be perfect. Although they had finally met there was still an element of disapproval from her mother, over their daughter being a single mother, living with a man who was not the father of her child, even though the biological father was an absolute bastard. On the other hand, her father had tried since that meeting to stay in touch with Andrea, often coming over and doting on Lily.
Moving towards his daughter, Bucky gently tugged the blanket over her, then put a stuffed animal under her arm. Kneeling down, he kissed her on the head and whispered his usual saying to her.
"Sleep tight, little star. In the morning, I'll catch you in my hand and make a wish to love you forever and always."
Getting up from his knees, he stood at the doorway again, basking in the love he felt for this toddler. From there he quietly entered the bedroom and stepped into the ensuite bathroom to remove his clothes and brush his teeth. He always kept a pair of sweatpants on a hook and put them on, then slipped under the bed covers, spooning behind Andrea. She made the sweetest sound when he draped his arm over her waist.
"I thought you were staying at Steve's?"
"I only had a few beers, so I came home. Besides, he snores when he's had too much."
She rolled over, kissed him sweetly on the mouth, then snuggled into his chest.
"I'm glad you're home. It was hard to get to sleep without you. Did you have a good time?"
"Yeah, it was good to see everyone outside of work. Thor and Peter Quill were there as well." He kissed the top of her head. "In a week we'll be married."
He could feel her smile forming on his chest, then she looked up at him again.
"Are we going to announce the baby?"
"I think we should wait. You're only six weeks along. Although they'll probably figure it out when you don't drink any alcohol."
"Probably," she yawned. "Natasha thinks Steve might be proposing to her. She said he's been acting quite mysterious lately. Did he say anything to you?"
He couldn't help but smile. If he lied, Andrea would know it. If he didn't lie and she told Natasha, Steve wouldn't be happy with him.
"It was brought up, but he won't say when it's going to happen. You're not going to tell her, are you?"
She didn't answer but by her regular breathing he could tell she was asleep. He didn't even get a chance to tell her about the charges being dropped. That could wait until the morning. He kissed her head again and closed his eyes, feeling like he was the luckiest man in the world.
💍 💐
One week later
Having his head down between his knees wasn't helping Bucky breathe, even as his mother rubbed his back soothingly. Sam and Steve stood there, wringing their hands, hoping that their friend wasn't about to pass out just 10 minutes before his wedding. Winnifred looked up at the two of them.
"Get him some water," she said. "Send Dr. Banner in."
"Yeah, good idea," said Steve, relieved at the suggestion. "Sam, you get the doctor, and I'll get the doctor." Sam looked at him, then slapped him lightly upside the back of his head. "What the hell?"
"We can't both get the doctor," replied the other man.
"Boys, focus," said Winnifred. "Sam, you get the water. Steve, you get the doctor. Go."
She shook her head. For 34-year-old men, they still had their dumbass moments where they acted 14.
"I don't know why I'm like this," gasped Bucky. "I want to get married. I love Andrea and want to be with her. I feel almost like I did whenever I saw blood. Ma, why is this happening now?"
How he got that torrent of words out when he could barely breathe made no sense to Winnifred, but she wasn't about to call her son out on it. He always had been a sensitive soul, and she was sure this had something to do with it. Bruce Banner arrived first, accompanied by Steve.
"What's the problem?" he asked.
"He feels like he's going to faint," said Winnifred. "Said it's like whenever he saw blood before."
"Bucky, do you feel like you're going to vomit?" asked Banner.
"Yes ... no, I don't know. I just don't feel right, like I'm going to pass out at any moment."
"Hey, look at me." Bucky raised his head. "Tell me three things that you see."
"Um, the chair ... the mirror ... um, um, the carpet."
"Good," smiled Bruce. "Now, three sounds. What can you hear, right now?"
Bucky breathed in heavily. "My breath. The sound of music outside." He focused more on Dr. Banner. "A siren, far away."
"Excellent. Just breathe, steady in for five then out for five. Now I want you to move three body parts. Can you do that?"
"Yeah."
He sat up and moved his head from side to side. Then he clenched and unclenched his fists. Finally, he stuck his feet out in front of him, then brought them back to their original position. Sam appeared with the water.
"I had to wait for the bartender to show up ... oh, you look better."
He gave the water to Bucky, who nodded his head and sipped it, then took a longer drink. He kept breathing in and out, following Dr. Banner's example. The older man patted him on the shoulder.
"Feel better, now?"
"Yeah, I do. Thanks."
"No problem. It was just a little bit of anxiety you were feeling. If it happens again try the 3-3-3. Three things you can see, three things you can hear and move three body parts. It redirects your brain to stop the anxiety. Works every time." The doctor stood up. "Just give him a couple of minutes. Winnie, are you walking him down the aisle?"
"I am now," she said.
"Just support him. He'll be fine once he gets to the front. I have to say this is a nice place for a wedding. Very picturesque."
He left and Winnifred kept rubbing Bucky's back. Finally, he nodded and stood up.
"Okay, let's get married."
The wedding planner arrived to tell them it was time. Together, they walked to where the outdoor ceremony was set up in the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens. Sam and Steve walked towards the officiant first, positioning themselves at the front, then Bucky walked out with his mother, stopping at the first row of chairs to kiss her on the cheek, before he joined his friends. Then Natasha and Maria appeared, with Lily in front of them, her tiny hands holding a basket of flower petals. As When You Wish Upon a Star played, the little girl, wearing a lacy pink dress, scattered her petals, stopping to put some in people's hands along the way. Bucky felt his heart in his throat, as his lips trembled, seeing his daughter taking her roll so seriously. Then she saw him.
"Dada," she cried, dropping the basket, and running to him, making everyone swoon at the sight, as he picked her up and kissed her.
"You stay with me, and we'll watch Mama together, okay?"
She nodded then pointed to where Andrea waited while the music to A Groovy Kind of Love started. He laughed at first, then began to cry at how beautiful she looked. She stood alone at the other end, then she looked to one side and was joined by her father. Kissing her on the cheek, he walked her down the aisle, a big grin on his face. There were more kisses when she arrived to where Bucky stood, from her dad to her and Lily, then a handshake to the groom.
For such a memorable moment in his life, Bucky could never remember much of the ceremony itself. He remembered how Andrea looked while they gazed at each other as if they were the sun, moon, and stars personified. He remembered saying "I do" and putting the wedding band on her finger but everything else was a blur until they kissed. Lily had already wiggled out of his arms to go to his mother, making everyone laugh. When he was told he could kiss the bride he placed his hands on Andrea's cheeks, then kissed her softly and sweetly, wanting it to last forever.
More flower petals were tossed at them as they walked down the aisle and led everyone to the pool beside the Palm House, set up for cocktails. They left briefly for photographs amongst the flowers blooming nearby. When the late afternoon turned into the evening, and the light became more golden as sunset approached, the Palm House was opened for the reception. The glass walled structure, filled with more colourful flowers, and festooned in fairy lights, seemed magical in appearance. Lily was entranced by it and clapped her hands in pure joy.
The first dance for the couple was to You Make Me Feel Brand New, the third song they ever danced to when Andrea had to nudge Bucky into finally kissing her. Everyone who had been there from the start of Bucky and Andrea's relationship, watched with soft smiles on their faces at the tenderness between the couple. That song was the one most suited for the wedding dance, although the other two songs made it to the set list. It wasn't all 70s and 80s music, as they made sure there was something for everyone, including some sultry Spanish style songs that brought out Steve and Natasha, in a repeat of the first time they danced.
If anyone noticed that Andrea wasn't drinking, they didn't say anything, although Winnifred and several others suspected that Lily would have a sibling early in the new year. The toddler held out for a long time, dancing with her parents and with anyone she asked. No one turned her down. When she finally conked out, a bed of sorts was made for her using a cushioned bench and Steve's borrowed jacket as a blanket. She slept there, oblivious to everything around her, until her parents made their goodbyes, and Winnifred lifted the little girl up in her arms, carrying her out to the limousine that took them home to her apartment.
The party went on for some time. Steve, after a quite energetic dance with Natasha, suggested they go out to the pool to cool off. They sat on a bench on the far side of the pool, overlooking the dark water, which reflected the lights coming from the Palm House.
"What a great wedding," she smiled, resting her head on his shoulder. "This was such a beautiful place to have it."
"It was," he agreed, looking up at the night sky. "We could have a great wedding here."
"You have to ask me first," chuckled Natasha.
He looked at her. "I'm asking."
It took her a moment to respond then she lifted her head up to look at him, aware that she could hear her heart beating loudly in her ears.
"What are you asking?"
"If you'll marry me. I think we could have something amazing together."
It was what he said to her the night of their first date.
"Yeah?" She swallowed. "Maybe, but there are complications."
He tilted his head slightly, smiling at that answer. "You already married?" She shook her head. "Engaged?"
"I could be, to the right guy."
"Natasha, I'm the right guy for you. I knew it from the first moment I saw you standing inside our office. I wanted you then and I want you for the rest of our lives." Gently, he traced her jaw with his fingertips. "Say yes to being amazing together. Say yes to the guy who loves you for the incredible woman you are."
"Steve?"
"Yeah?"
"Yes. Now shut up and kiss me."
Pulling her onto his lap, he kissed her fiercely, holding her as if he never wanted to let her go. Reaching into his pocket, he brought out the ring box and opened it. Natasha almost stopped breathing at the size of the diamond. She knew business was good, but this....
"It's not hot, is it?"
"Baby, I'm a legitimate businessman now. This didn't fall off a truck. Legally bought and paid for."
She admired it on her hand, then they stayed out there for some time, kissing and enjoying each other's company. When Sam appeared across the pool to say they had to close things up, he grinned at them, knowing that he would be repeating his own version of a proposal soon.
🌃 🌌
In the hotel room, Bucky, and Andrea, were catching their breath, laying on top of the rumpled duvet with their legs intertwined and her head on his chest. Their wedding clothes, strewn everywhere, weren't a priority, until his phone signalled a text message. Climbing off the bed, Bucky picked up his jacket, searching for the phone but it wasn't in any of the pockets. My pants, the phone must be in my pants. Where are they?
Andrea watched with amusement as he looked for his pants, then she got up and lifted her dress up from the floor, pulling his pants out from underneath it and reaching inside one the pockets to retrieve his phone, placing it in his hand. He grinned, kissed her, then opened the message, which he showed to Andrea.
Steve: She said yes.
"What should I say?" he asked.
"Congratulations, now go celebrate," suggested Andrea. "Then come back to bed and put it on silent."
He sent the message, put the phone on silent and tossed it onto a chair. Climbing back on the bed, he hovered over his wife, then stopped. His wife ... this woman was his wife and in the new year, she would be the mother of his child. How did he get so lucky?
"You okay?" she asked. "You were somewhere else for a moment."
"I was right here, thinking of how lucky I am that I have you in my life. You changed me, changed everything for the better when you walked past Barnes Contracting."
She shook her head, caressing her face.
"All I did was take Lily for a walk. Grandma said it was important to know the neighbourhood and your neighbours." She shrugged. "I just figured it would be good to know who had businesses in the neighbourhood as well. She was a teacher and knew lots of people."
"What was your grandma's name?"
"Lily Dugan," she answered. "She was a widow. My grandpa, her husband, died when I was little. She always said there was no better man than him. That's how I feel about you."
Bucky felt a lump in his throat. Dugan was the name of his dad's friend, who worked with him at Barnes Contracting. He remembered him, a big burly man with a large moustache and genial attitude who always made him laugh, even after the incident. Then suddenly, he wasn't around anymore, and his parents were sad for some time. Was it a coincidence or fate that brought Andrea past the very building her grandfather had worked at? It didn't matter, not in the long run. Placing one hand on Andrea's, he moved it so he could kiss her palm, then laid with his head on her chest as she ran her hand through his hair. He was right where he wanted to be; in the arms of the woman he loved, the woman he would always say made him a better man.
THE END
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Euphemia and James - Writer's Notes
Earlier this year I wrote a fic titled "Euphemia and James," a story exploring Euphemia Potter and infertility. This is the most deeply personal story I've ever written, and it took a few weeks to write it because of the emotions it stirred up for me, but honestly, being able to write this took years of processing emotions. I decided to share some of my notes on this fic in this post, and it includes this lovely cover image from @livelaughlovetoread. This story is also unique in that it's written in second person POV. It wasn't intended to come out that way, but that's how it came out. See below the image for my notes:
Euphemia and James came from these lines from the extra-canonical writings on Pottermore/whatever they call it these days:
"[Fleamont] sold the company at a vast profit when he retired, but no amount of riches could compensate him or his wife Euphemia for their childlessness. They had quite given up hope of a son or daughter when, to their shock and surprise, Euphemia found that she was pregnant and their beloved boy, James, was born."
If you don't know anything about infertility, I envy you somewhat. Studies have shown that a diagnosis or experience of infertility is similar to receiving a cancer diagnosis or losing a close loved one. It took me a while to realize that a lot of the feelings I had surrounding infertility was actually grief and mourning.
So, I put it all into this fic. There are a few points I want to highlight, if you decide to read the fic or want to see some lines, and my feelings around it all:
"When you meet Fleamont Potter a year into your job at the apothecary, you have no intention of marrying him."
I more or less shamelessly wrote Euphemia and Fleamont's relationship to be similar to mine with Mr C. In fact, Mr C aka @rawr-gorg-smash read this work and we were both sobbing messes by the end of it.
"It will happen when it happens, they say. It will come when you least expect it, they say. That’s what everyone says, and you’re ready to punch the next person in the face who tells you to just “relax.”"
Infertile people will get advice like this frequently. It's meant to be helpful or sometimes soothing, I think, but all too often it's an empty hope. Sometimes, bodies just don't work right, no matter how much relaxing you do.
"It’s not polite to ask. Everyone knows where magical, adopted children come from. They are Muggleborn children who are delicately extracted from their birth homes and replaced with Squibs, or sometimes not replaced at all."
This part is world building by me - the idea of adoption in a magical world seemed odd to me. How would infertile magical couples adopt if they can't use potions or charms? I wouldn't put it past them to just take a Muggleborn child, modify memories, and go. I won't touch on real world adoption-there's a lot to unpack there-but this idea gave me some thoughts on magical adoption.
"It seems selfish to want more, when you already have so much. You question, for the first time in your life, if you really want a child."
I have heard people say things to this effect: it's so selfish to want your 'own' children or to want children and bring them into this world, or some variation of that. If this is what you believe, you and I are going to disagree and I'm not going to try to convince you otherwise. But it's something I and many other infertile people have considered. The thing is, people have had children and will continue to have children throughout terrible periods of time. Does it make sense? Not necessarily. Human actions don't always make sense. To me, though, it speaks of hope. Hope for a better tomorrow, for a world that we will build that will be better for the next generation.
"Now you wish for a living child. There are no longer any expectations on your baby or the kind of person they’ll be. You want a living, breathing baby in your arms you can dote on, educate, feed, and guide through life."
I'll say that one of the few silver linings of infertility for me has been re-grounding my expectations of what kind of child I might have. It once was wishing for a boy or girl, or a kid who likes to read, or a kid who won't be into extreme sports, but now it's just a kid I want. I want to love them because they exist. That's all.
"It’s a shame that you only got nineteen years with your son, the one you wished had been born twenty years prior, so you could treasure twice as long with him."
One of my fears for having children later in life is not having enough time with them. Then again, young parents die. Even children die. If nothing else, whatever time I do have, I hope I use it to love whatever family I have to the fullest.
That's all I have for now. If you made it this far, read the fic, commented on it, left kudos, or a bookmark, thank you very kindly for your time. Of all the things I've written, this felt most like putting a piece of my heart into the world.
#euphemia potter#fleamont potter#james potter#euphemia x fleamont#cw infertility#infertility#cw pregnancy#pregnancy
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reread tiphs dialog recently. i love them lots
#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#lobotomy corp spoilers#lobcorp spoilers#i cant help it. the boxes....#i never know what to tag as spoilers and what not to. so just to be safe#tiphereth#tiphereth lobcorp#chesed#chesed lobcorp#do i do all of them..? some of them are smaller. ahh itll be okay i hope..#netzach#netzach lobcorp#ill stop there. there is gebura yesod and malkuth but its just one drawing for both#just general thoughts of mimicking others and trying to potray what maturity is. the dialog from story 1 when you meet them i think abt tip#talking abt being stern stoic and strict. then netz talking abt yesod and the two behaving similar like that#just thought some others would be cute. trying to get used to how id draw her. ah the gebura tiph one was a loose idea in gebs story to#where the two talk and tiph advises against asking to much and to hold onto that hate iirc. been a bit. then the idea of her able to replac#parts. then the degradation of the soul after being destroyed. maybe tiph might check up on her or peek in to see how shes doing considerin#the idea to hold onto hate was advice She gave. iirc. anyways the concept of having black coffee to look cool and grown#they put the shortest next to the tallets in the same layer. had another idea to have the two tiphs stack atop one another to be as tall as#chesed and gebs but i got too tired. its a cute idea though might do it later. another thing i wanted to do later on was pertaining to#singing a song of homeland and lisa stating she wanted to dance. that and the backdrop from c comand being a giant stage. preformance arts#malkuth is there because the three all do a command team. lots is stuff and responsibility. feel like tiph would have beef w her . also an#iirc moment i recall something abiut the two teams havinf a rivalry or competition of sorts? kind of funny what beef u got w some kids bro#more likely pertaining to the agents inside of the teams itself to be honest. i think id be cute is malkuth would give some help tips thoug
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Our usual. Those words bothered her in a way she couldn't identify, maybe because there was a usual. A routine of sorts that had developed between the two. She would have to correct that, as much as she was kidding about finding him a girlfriend while he was gone, she'd have to consider doing it to make sure that would break this up. He wouldn't be able to hang out around her office all the time if she set him up with someone else to occupy his time with. Though for some reason, it made her a bit sad that he wouldn't be around as much once she did.
Sipping from her coffee, she noticed the way he bit his lip and raised a questioning eyebrow. What was so funny? but she dared not ask glad that he had changed the topic to his case. "Hmm. I'm sure with you they'll have their shit solved in no time. Just need someone that knows what they're doing. Thanks," she made a sound between a clicking of her teeth and a sigh as she thought about it. "I don't do divorce things, never have but I don't know. I felt bad when she came to me, I was her last resort. He's a cop and making her life hell," shrugging she put her mug down" Time to make his one." Thinking it over for a moment, she put the cinnamon sugar back in the cupboard and finished off the coffee as it was. "Hmm," was the respond she gave as she listened to him tell her about his allergy. Genetic. Well that sucked.
"Please don't." She held her hand up. She loved Dolly, the thought of her barking until she ate made her anxious. "I do eat," she began to say a bit faster than usual as she came up with a lie. Words spilling faster than they ever had before out of her. "I just haven't gone grocery shopping. I usually have a lot of food around, fruit too, this case just has taken a lot of my attention right now. Please, don't have her do that. I'll be eating a lot when she's here after this disposition I'm going out for groceries." Hoping that it would be enough to have him drop the matter.
"Oh, thanks." The words were said with surprise. Someone had to find comfort in it. There were times when it couldn't lull her to sleep. When it would bring the nightmares on instead of help. "You didn't have to do that but thanks. I'm glad you were able to get comfortable."
There he went again, we. That is where we're gonna go. He was so sure in including her,like it was a guarantee that it was happening and she would be a part of it. "It sounds lovely." She didn't want to add that it would be a shame that she wouldn't see it, seeing as when he got back, she'd have him occupied with a shiny new person when he returned. That was neither here nor there, no one would miss her once she got her replacement hired and the office fully up and running. She would once again be that person someone vaguely remembered once. "Wildfire," she repeated with a smile. "Now that sounds like a horse that would definitely kick me."
As much as she thought about getting rid of him from her life, when it was time for them to part now she felt the odd sensation of missing him already. Shaking it off, she nodded. "Great, I'll be waiting. And you have my word," she held up three fingers on one hand, despite never having been a scout. "I'll walk you out, gotta unlock the door for the Holden's anyway." Though he had tucked one side in, she couldn't help it, just like last night, and reached over and tucked the other side in too. "There, even. Better." Holding the door open for him, she gave him a small smile. "Have a safe trip and again thanks for letting me borrow Dolly for the week. I'll watch over her well. Promise. "
As if to give her confirmation he merely nodded his head and chuckled. "Gotta choose your words wisely around me. I find loopholes." Wally kid just enjoying his time with her in her kitchen. "Gotta admit this is quite a change from our usual. I actually like it." Shaking his head he didn't want to inconvenience her. "No, it's okay. Poptart is fine. Though the fact you know I like toast and jelly is freaking me out a bit. Not in a bad way." he added not wanting to make her feel like he was mad or anything. "It's usually me who notices things. I'm glad you didn't say peanut butter and jelly." His hand did the kaput gesture and laughed to himself.
He nodded as he kept chewing and smiled biting down on his lip to keep from laughing. She had the cutest pair of bunny teeth and that made him want to scream. But didn't he kept his composure. "Right? I can only imagine what type of chaos I'll be walking into. Though maybe it won't be that bad. Case hasn't officially closed so maybe I can offer up help after all." Cheating cases made him feel queasy. Never were truly easy so he hoped for her sake that this one would be a breeze. "I hope that it won't get dragged out into court. I know sometimes it's not so black and white but they wouldn't have come to you if they didn't have confidence you could get this case done and over with without the dragged on notions."
There she went again taking him by surprise knowing something so deeply personal that he hadn't noticed she even knew it. "Mhmm. That would be deathly allergic. But I do carry my epipen so if I happened to ingest some I'd be okay. If I didn't have it then we'd be screwed. Don't worry you can put it in your coffee." Just for good measure he scooted over a bit to be a safe distance from it and smiled going back to his poptart. "Unfortunately I got my grandfather's allergy. Skipped my mom but trickled down to us. Mine is the most severe though. My sisters just get itchy."
"You don't eat?" His shock was audible the more he thought about it and shook his head. "I'll have to tell Dolly to come bark at you at breakfast and lunch and dinner so you can have your meals." He'd do that too no lie. Dolly was easily trainable since she was a former K9 in training.
He smiled that smile that told her he was happy she slept well. "I'm glad. Weird thing. I never can sleep in a new place. Can never get comfortable but last night was different. Your bed is heaven though just saying that." Then remember he had made the bed. "Oh that reminds me I made your bed. I didn't want to leave like that and I tucked the ends underneath the mattress." Wally was neat and organized most times and that did go down to the way he made his own bed.
"They do," he laughed thinking the change in topic was peculiar. "They can never sit still. It was a passion project when we all moved to the islands. My sisters loved horses and Di also grew up riding them so Andy went and bought the land and built the ranch ground up." Normally he was the one asking the left field questions. "They have a ranch actually. That is where we're gonna go. It's in Kaneohe. Which is about 2 hours and change from Lahaina to Kaneohe. So, we don't go often only if it's one of the kids birthdays or when we want to make it a weekend thing. Sometimes I go to keep an eye on things. Their ranch hands keep it running. They stay on property. Andy built them a giant house so they didn't need to go back and forth." One thing was certain, they were paid fairly and treated like family. "You'll get to meet them when we go after I come back from LA. Finally will get to meet Wildfire's filly. She's one."
He pulled his hair behind his ear and shot her a grin. "Good luck." As she said that his phone dinged telling him he was to be headed to the air field. "Actually, perfect timing. I'm gonna head off. I got Jamie to agree to bring Dolly to you before dinner and bedtime so take care of my furry best friend. Enjoy your week and I'll see you for adventure week." His grin was bright as he hopped off the counter and landed on his feet.
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My hot take is that marcanne has as much potential for toxic yuri as any other calamity trio ship and it's not nearly as soft and fluffy as one may think
#amphibia#marcanne#anne boonchuy#marcy wu#in one hand: marcy kidnapped her. by giving her AS A BIRTHDAY GIFT something that was meant to benefit HER#(yes she didn't know it would work but the point is that she thought about herself first. even though it was her best friend's birthday)#she never wanted to come back. she wanted to keep her with her forever. she was happiest when they were together#most importantly she saw what she did as a good thing. as something good that she gave to her#yet still lied to her. After what happened with Sasha#she still lied to her. became another person to betray Anne#then she fucking died for her 😭😭😭#on the other hand. you have anne#she looked after her. she certainly loved her. but she didn't care much about the things that were important to marcy#nor did she care about her feelings or needs. she and sasha third-wheeled her for years#even though marcy came first#she could only really see her once sasha was gone#you have to remove her from the equation for both of them to flourish and connect#because the shadow of sasha's abuse oppressed them for so long. anne and marcy reuniting in S2 looked a lot like two people escaping#abuse together. healing together. coming into their own. becoming better people. they get to know themselves and each other much more deeply#now that they're free. only - they aren't free. they're constantly thinking about sasha. when sasha comes back they welcome her#they reproduced the toxic patterns she left of them#though i'll recognize that in anne's case she healed a lot more from sasha's toxicity than marcy#and you can see that in how her way of relation to marcy is a lot healthier than marcy's way of relating to anne#anne is now truly and genuinely connecting to her friend. marcy is still lying to her#pushing down her feelings. ignoring her own needs. pretending everything is okay. lying lying lying#anne was the only one who could escape but marcy couldn't quite move on yet. she couldn't be free#hope this makes sense i'm writing it at 4am i'll delete tomorrow if i realize it sounds dumb
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