#i hope everyone enjoyed this little countdown i have so much love for him and it's overwhelming and idk what to do with it sometimes

[taehyunghobi]

➺ HOBI COMEBACK WEEK COUNTDOWN: D-DAY! ☀️ ^♡^

[erwinsvow]

𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐰𝐨, 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞

summary: jack abbot thinks he's too broken to fix. you just want to take care of him the way he takes care of you.

author's note: here it is! the first longer night shift reader and jack fic ♡ i hope everyone enjoys!

word count: 3.7k

tags: night shift reader x attending jack, comfort and angst, people are making bets (guess who wins!), patient death/loss, age gap relationship (implied but no ages specified!), idk i went a little crazy for two hours

it’s not an easy thing to take care of him. 

he knows that. there haven’t been that many people in his life who have been able to manage it. his wife was one, robby’s sort of another. jack has this thing—he has to at least try to take care of those around him before he can accept any of their help for himself. it’s almost a test of worth, to determine that it’s not a burden he’s placing unduly on anyone. it’s an exchange, he decides, a fair exchange. that way he’s not forcing anyone, because he knows how hard it is, how hard it can be. robby sees a side of it. his wife saw another.

and out of the black, heading into the blue, you are beginning to see it. he doesn’t know how it happened this way, just knows that the sweet resident who had come onto his night-shift because the day shift was beginning to be too much, was now the very reason he doesn’t head straight up to the roof after a very, very long night. 

he knows it’s not easy, that every time he loses a patient, he glances at the clock. the moment someone’s life was over, and the very moment that is going to ruin the lives of all the people who loved them. before he’d start the countdown—how many hours left on this shift? how many until he can go to the roof and breathe, scream and yell and sit in silence and watch the city wake up beneath him. 

it’s selfish. he momentarily checks out after time of death is called. robby does moments of reflections. maybe that’s how he’s able to manage it sometimes, break up the grief into little pieces throughout the day. 

jack isn’t like that. he’s always been the kind to bury, nestle it somewhere deep inside and keep adding, adding, adding. add until it’s about to burst, and then go to the roof and let some of it out. maybe if he tried robby’s way, he wouldn’t have felt like this for so long.

where can so much grief go? there’s no outlet for it, not the way jack does it. some of the things he buries are lost inside him forever, no escape, no exit.

and then you come along. 

jack’s prided himself in the fact that he’s good to the residents. they get more confident under his tutelage, make decisions more firmly, make them quickly and execute them correctly. that’s why robby had sent you over to him, hadn’t it? because you doubted yourself too much. because you felt like you weren’t making the right call.

from seven in the morning to seven at night, the place is crowded. it’s all hands on deck but there’s just a smidge too many hands, especially when there’s students. you were able to blend into the background for a couple months, but it’s just plainly wrong to let it hinder your education.

that’s why robby had sent you to him, right? for your education. to make you a better doctor, better than you already were, which was saying something. 

because jack abbot thinks that you’re incredibly gifted. gifted in the things that he can’t teach someone, in ways that he can’t explain. you have a special touch. patient-care is your forte. if he had to pick the nicest resident, it would be you. but you don’t believe in yourself. 

and he had sent himself to the task of fixing that. it’s what jack does, what he’s always done. patch it up and send it out.

(you’re a little different—he wants to make you believe in yourself more. he wants you to prove it to yourself. make yourself say it and mean it, not just because he’s telling you. that you are capable, that you were meant for this. that this is where you belong. that you have a safety net in the form of your attending—that he’ll be there with an outstretched arm, waiting incase you need him. you won’t, he knows. but you still need to feel him there. it’s working, he knows it is.)

it had been working perfectly fine so far. you build your routine, get yourself settled, start answering trauma calls with a run. 

one time he has you and ellis start the incoming together. tells parker to ask you questions, justify all of your decisions to her, but let you call the shots. when the charge nurse tells you the details, you head straight outside. you pull a yellow gown for yourself and the gloves in your size—those ones are baby blue. and then you pull another gown and the black gloves—the ones in his size. he watches from the nurse’s station, watches ellis take them and watches you look around, like you’re waiting for him to show up. he doesn’t, not this time.

you handle the case perfectly. oddly enough, he can’t seem to remember any of the specifics about it, even though he’s the one who signed off on your detailed note. 

jack watches from the door. you’ve got your back to him, and ellis looks up and sees him, but he shakes his head. he wants to see how you do without him, after so many with him. and you’re perfect—just like he knew you would be. the nurses move in tandem around you, listening closely to your orders. ellis asks questions and you answer, and you don’t sound like your answers are questions themselves—though you had at one point, not too long ago. 

that’s something he’d worked you out of, he thinks, a certain smugness seeping into his veins, satisfaction rolling through every muscle. 

you look out the other door, the opposite of where he’s standing. you stretch your neck like you’re trying to see what’s out there, and then you turn your attention back to your patient right away.

and once the patient is stable, that’s when he comes in. you’re doing it again, looking out the wrong door and as much as he wants to deny it, as wrong as it is, he knows you’re looking for him.

“good work, doctor,” he says, and you jump a little. you turn to look at him, but he’s looking at your senior resident for the assessment.

“dr. abbot, i-” 

“she did great,” parker comments, and you stop to beam at her.

“thank you.” ellis peels off her gloves and gown, black gloves that had been meant for him going into the bin. she gives you further instructions and you nod, and when it’s just the two of you, he finally turns to meet your eyes.

and the way you smile at him blows him away. it’s all over your face—from your gleaming eyes to the cheeks that must hurt, the lips that he can’t stop thinking about. there’s something else there too. neither of you want to say it, though you try.

“thank you, dr. abbot. i-” the words falter and die on your tongue. but in your joy, how pleased you are with yourself for once, you find the confidence he’s been wanting you to have all along. “i was looking for you.”

and jack swallows hard. it’s one thing to have a flirtation, to teach you, to mentor you. to make you cups of coffee and tea and buy a box of those protein bars that you like the best, because the other ones taste weird. to defend your yellow cup with his best glare, to stop in the aisle at costco and buy a duplicate pair just incase he ever needs to replace it. you love that yellow mug, and well, he loves—

“dr. abbot? you okay?” 

and it’s normally him asking you that.

“i’m fine, kid. you did great.” 

“so did you.” 

-

when jack walks by dana at around seven-ten, her and the other nurses go remarkably silent. 

“yes?” he asks, grabbing the black thermos from the counter where he’d been finishing his notes. it’s also from costco—chipped and bent all over the place, little flecks of silver making an appearance around the bottom. you’d made a joke about it once—even your cup is salt and pepper. and now he thinks about it every time he picks it up.

“what? i didn’t say anything,” dana replies, settling an ipad back in the charging port, moving around papers at the station. “but just so you know, the pool’s up to three hundred.”

jack sets his cup down a little harder than he means to, forearms resting on the sterile counter.

“what pool?” he demands, and dana shrugs. if he didn’t love her so much he would kill her.

“i’m just saying. if you’d like to help your favorite nurse contribute to her retirement fund, then you can—”

“oh? i can what?” 

it’s just not this easy for him anymore. you are full of all the good things that he so clearly lacks, made of so much sunshine it’s pouring out of you. you have love in stores, ready to be doled out at any time, to anyone. patients, coworkers, even the medical students you just met a couple minutes ago. he hears you—offering the flashcards you made for boards and the interview tips that got you to match at your top choice. 

he is entirely unworthy of your love. he knows it, deep down. loving him would break you. trying to piece him back together would drain you dry. and he doesn’t want to do that to you, you deserve better. maybe he can take care of you at work, but outside of these four walls, if you saw what he was like with idle hands and an empty apartment, or if you saw him up on that roof-

“dr. abbot?” 

your voice seems to always be enough to snap him out of it. 

“goodbye, dana,” he says, walking up next to you, thermos in hand. your eyes briefly glance down at it, smiling. “what’s going on, kid?” 

“remember what you had said? about breakfast?” and you smile at him like getting breakfast with jack abbot sounds like the great thing in the world right now. it’s almost seven-thirty and you probably haven’t slept in fifteen hours, and yet you keep smiling, big eyes blinking at him while you wait patiently for an answer.

“yeah.” he clears his throat, looking back at dana momentarily. she’s smiling at him, and then she turns to smack the side of robby’s arm, pointing him the direction of you two. “that sounds great. after you.” 

he shouldn’t have said yes. he knows what’ll happen if you start thinking that you can fix whatever is wrong with jack abbot, and he would like to avoid that entirely. but you beam at him again like you had earlier with ellis, and jack is a lot of things, but one thing is he is not, is a jerk. he won’t disappoint you about this, not when he’s secretly relieved you’re eating after shift. he’s seen you with sugary granola bars and pastries when you should be filling up on protein after a shift like this.

so he follows you out, ignoring the exchange of money behind him. 

breakfast is nice. you get chocolate-chip pancakes and he makes you get eggs too, and then hands you strips of bacon from his plate too. he hasn’t seen you like this before, and he tries to soak it into his memory. 

(something deep inside says that he should cut the tether before you get too attached. it’ll only hurt more to prolong it, to let it linger. the possibility of something between the two of you. and then you offer him a bite of a pancake drenched in syrup and everything in his head goes silent.)

breakfast becomes a weekly recurrence. there’s a twenty-four seven diner he loves just up the road from the hospital, and he’s been before with shen once, robby a couple times if their schedules lined up. it’s not particularly unusual to see him there with you, though he feels like he’s committing some sort of a crime.

you wear pullovers from your alma mater. the backpack you bring to work is the same one you used all four years of college and medical school, a fact you are very proud of. when he looks at it—his chest hurts. it’s hardly worn, looks like it’s in great condition—a couple of pins tacked on the side where your water bottle sits and a pocket for your badge and wallet in the front. he has to force himself to remember that you’re younger than any woman he’s seriously talked to before. his wife had been two months older than him, something he used to tease her about all the time. 

would you do that? would you tease him about the age difference? or would you prefer to ignore it, set it aside and try to forget about it? it’s a heavy question for breakfast after twelve hours on. 

you take him to another place that you like, too, closer to your apartment. you both eat bagels and sip on juice—orange for him, apple for you—and that’s where you learn more about his time as a medic. the breakfast burrito place near the park is where you tell him about how you’ve wanted to be a doctor since you were twelve, that you thought you’d had a calling for pediatrics and you’d even been the president of the peds club in medical school. and then you’d rotated through the emergency department third year and completely changed your plan.

you share a stack of waffles—chocolate chip with strawberries and whipped cream, at your insistence. he doesn’t know how he’s supposed to say no to you, not when you ask him so sweetly. he learns about your kitten and how you’ve always been scared that you’re going to do the wrong thing and until very recently, that you’ve just been playing pretend and you’ll get caught one day. 

and back at the diner is where he tells you about his wife. and you listen intently and nod and hold his hands when his voice breaks and run your fingers over his knuckles. you don’t let go of his hand the entire walk back to your apartment, and outside the door, you give him a hug. and the two of you stay like that for a while. that’s when you and jack kiss for the first time. slow, steady, a kiss that you’ve been dreaming of for months. it takes all the air out of your lungs and when you finally go inside, you realize your shoulder is a little wet and your lips are swollen. 

even hours later, jack can still taste apple juice on his tongue.

another week after that, you both answer the incoming trauma together. it’s six-thirty, so someone might come and take over, but it doesn’t work out that way. it’s a man who got t-boned at an intersection on the way to school drop-off. his wife and daughter are getting their cuts stitched, you think, and the patient had been slurring at you when he came in. thank god i put her behind her mom today. thank god, thank god- and jack does something he doesn’t always do. 

“get the mom, get the kid. let-let them talk.” 

and while you do the ultrasound and the e-fast and order for type and cross-match, you hear his daughter crying and a wife telling her husband how much she loves him. 

and you and jack try everything, everything you can think of, but sometimes, there’s just no coming back. he doesn’t even make it to surgery. jack walks out first, and then you, and you see his daughter turn away from the medical student that’s tending to her wound, standing up with hopeful eyes like you and jack have good news for her.

and you feel incredibly broken. your day hasn’t even started yet. and you lock eyes with jack for a second—just a second, and he stares back at you, hardened, in a way you haven’t seen before. you’ve both lost patients, lost patients together. sometimes it’s just different, in a way that you can’t explain. 

it must have been an hour, an hour and a half you spent in the trauma room. the entire day shift is there now. 

“head home, kid,” jack says. “i’ll talk to the family.” 

you bring your hand to his shoulder, pulling back until he turns to face you. 

“i’ll talk to the family.” 

it’s not an easy thing to take care of. he tries to tell you something but you shake your head at him, the hand on his shoulder lingering. people are looking, he thinks. but then again, he’s never cared that much. and in this moment, neither do you. 

you head over to the family, excuse the nurses and the student doing the stitches. you pull the curtains, and all he hears is sobbing. 

and when you come back out, he know you held it together in front of them, but your shoulders are shaking, your chin is wobbling. and in front of all those people, he brings you in for a hug. 

a real hug—like the one you had in front of your apartment. jack’s grip is tight on you, his arms caging you in, covering everything so you can’t see anything, can’t think about anything else but him. he rests his chin on your head, and closes his eyes, and then the two of you walk back to the lockers together. 

it’s not an easy thing to take care of him. and somehow, without ever telling you, you know all about how to do it. you know a lot of things about him. you know what this job does to him and that if he had gone to tell that family they lost their father and husband, that he would’ve ended up on the roof this morning. you know that jack abbot doesn’t halve any of his burdens, that he’s been afraid to rely on you like how you rely on him. to need you in the way that you need him. and you know that he won’t tell you what he needs, but you’ve gotten somewhat adept at figuring him out, just like how he has with you.

that day you leave holding hands. neither of you are in the right mood to go out for breakfast, so he elects to take you back to his apartment, an arm swung around your shoulder the entire walk there. you’re still a little teary-eyed, wiping them away at his front door while you head inside with him. 

you’ve never seen the inside of jack’s apartment, but he’s mentioned it in one of your many conversations. the record collection, his wife’s plants that he takes care of, the kitchen that’s too big for one person. 

the morning light hits the place beautifully. you stare out of his window while he heads to the kitchen, and you look around. first the records, then the plants, just like he’d described. there’s pothos and peace lily and little succulents along the windowsill. you look at the rest of it—incredibly fitting. a brown leather couch and a bookshelf with medical textbooks and a couple of mystery thrillers. you laugh to yourself, imagining jack curling up with one of those books at night.

when you turn back, he’s cracking eggs and laying out strips of bacon on the pan. you head over to the other side of the island, taking a seat on one of the stools. 

“no pancakes?”

“you’re gonna get cavities, y’know,” jack says, and you smile at him. 

“it’s worth it.”

“i love your smile the way it is right now. don’t go changing it on me.” and that does make you smile, staring at jack making breakfast for the two of you. it all feels so domestic. like you’re just walking into the life that was meant for you all along.

you’ve only been on the night shift for a couple of months. 

how could he have been so stupid? trying to fight what you did to him when it was like gravity, like the tide, like every other force in this world that he knows about and cannot control. you’re exactly where you’re meant to be, and so is he.

“mel texted me. she won the bet,” you say, setting your phone down. you lean against your hand, inhaling the smell of the first of many home-cooked meals you’ll eat, made by jack abbot.

“that so? i thought dana was a shoo-in.” 

“dana got the timing wrong. thought it’d happen during the night shift. but technically, you hugged me at eight-thirty, so..” 

“and what was the winning combo?” he stares at you, probably for the millionth time since you met him. and still, somehow, it’s enough that you feel it in your bones. you want to look away but you don’t. “you want toast, kid?” 

“yes please. she didn’t say, but i’ll ask. later.” 

you and jack settle at his wooden dining table ten minutes later, a plate full of protein and a promise that he’ll get you something sweet when you wake up later. jack lifts up his pant leg and takes off his prosthetic, setting it against the chair and relaxing a little bit more. you can see his shoulders loosen up. when he catches you staring, he smiles back.

“what?”

“nothing. do you have juice?”

“i think there’s some apple in there. i can-”

“no, i got it.” you get up, walking towards to the fridge. “i thought you didn’t like apple.” you know he doesn’t—he prefers orange. 

“i changed my mind.” you smile back at him, finding the apple juice and setting it on the counter. 

“cups?” 

“the cabinet on your right. no, your other right.”

you laugh and open it up, your laugh dying in your throat as you stare at two yellow mugs sitting front and center in the cupboard. you pick them up, bringing them over to the table with jack, and stare at him.

“oh,” he says. “i can explain. it’s incase-” but you don’t want to listen for another second, so you sit on his lap, pressing your lips together and forgetting all about breakfast and apple juice.

♡ thanks for reading!

[fastandcarlos]

The Littlest Surprise » Daniel Ricciardo

caption: hello im a new f1 content creator and would love some feedback if you enjoy my fics tysm 🩷

summary: you’ve not been seen at the paddock for a while and the fans are getting worried, little do they know the reason for your absence is about to make everyone’s dreams come true

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by schecoperez, georgerussell63 and 842,420 others

danielricciardo: always a pleasure to have the fam on my side, excited to show the little ones what uncle danny gets up to 🥺

49,302 comments

username1: is this yet another race y/n won’t be at this weekend??

username2: I cannot wait for the day that this man becomes a dad

username3: if y/n doesn’t hurry up and make him a dad…daniel i’m happy to offer my services 😊

maxverstappen1: how big is y/n/n now! she looks so grown up 🥺

danielricciardo: @/maxverstappen1 she’ll be 6 soon, where does the time go??

oscarpiastri: don’t forget your little adopted aussie nephew

landonorris: and your british nephew too!!

danielricciardo: @/oscarpiastri @/landonorris hey! i might be a bit older but not old enough to be your uncle thank you

username4: anyone else think something might be going on, daniel posting about his family without y/n there is strange

username5: @/username4 let’s not overthink this too much, y/n might just be busy

username4: @/username5 it’s been ages since we last saw her, you gotta admit it’s a bit sus

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by lewishamilton, alex_albon and 629,301 others

danielricciardo: another great weekend of racing, nice feeling to be back on the podium…man how I missed hearing that champagne pop 🏎️

38,402 comments

charles_leclerc: congrats brother, nice to be up there with you once again

username6: y/n not distracting you anymore to stop you getting on the podium??

username7: @/username6 wtf? why would you suggest such a thing?

carlossainz55: always knew you’d be back up there one day, long may it continue!

yukitsunoda0511: you gotta give me some tips bro, those manoeuvres were lethal today 🔥

pierregasly: danny ric just doing danny ric things

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by ynusername, charles_leclerc and 922,547 others

danielricciardo: hey team! just wanted to clear up some things after miami this weekend…me and y/n are absolutely fine, had some things going on that I promise we’ll explain soon ❤️❤️ for now tho, here’s an update on life recently ☁️✨

92,174 comments

ynusername: 🥺🥺🥺🥺

username8: I knew you guys would be okay, take as long as you need my two favourites!!

username9: a big screw you to those who doubted you…real fans love you guys

landonorris: I love you guys, here if you need anything brother ❤️

username10: hope whatever is going on clears up soon, we’re missing you guys around here🩷

lilymhe: tell y/n to gimme a call! ily guys ✨

visacashapprb: can’t wait to welcome y/n back into the paddock soon - see you for race week!

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by danielricciardo, iamrebeccad and 310,409 others

ynusername: it’s been a long few months, but we finally feel ready to share with you our happy news. pregnancy has been tough, I’d love to say it has treated me well, but it hasn’t. I cannot thank daniel enough for being by my side and helping me out whenever I’ve needed him…baby spam incoming ⛅️🍼

ps. each of us chose a picture to share, guess who chose what 🙄

28,461 comments

danielricciardo: words cannot begin to describe how proud I am of how brave you’ve been, the worst of it is over now my love, the countdown to baby ricciardo starts now

danielricciardo: ps my photo is way cooler than yours is

landonorris: omg I can’t believe you guys didn’t tell me, uncle Lando reporting for duty!

carlossainz55: the biggest congratulations you two, you’re going to be the best parents

carmenmmundt: so glad to hear y/n is doing better, may the rest of your pregnancy be a dream ✨

lilymhe: the strongest girl I know - so excited to see you become a mum 😍

username11: all my manifesting has paid off, baby ricciardo will be the luckiest

oscarpiastri: AUSSIE AUSSIE AUSSIE!!

estebanocon: my spidey senses were spot on, I knew a baby was on the way!

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liked by danielricciardo, lance_stroll and 102,585 others

ynusername: life lately 💫 exhausted but loving all the little things (including daniel 😂)

17,492 comments

username12: y/n looks like she’s living the dream, mum life suits her well 🥺

danielricciardo: im definitely not a “little thing” how else did we end up like this?

landonorris: @/danielricciardo excuse me sir you are about to have a child, sort your humour out

maxverstappen1: glad to see you’re feeling more like yourself again y/n, brunch on me soon!

ynusername: @/maxverstappen1 yes - let’s not tell daniel #gatecrasher

danielricciardo: @/ynusername you know your comments are public…right?

username13: anyone else wishing they could brunch with y/n too??

lance_stroll: sending all the good book recs your way!

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 738,603 others

danielricciardo: babymooning 🍼 the smile says it all, so happy to have my girl back on her feet and feeling like herself again…making the last few memories just the two of us 🥺

83,500 comments

ynusername: thank you for the best couple of days and being my personal taxi driver

username14: look at his face - you can tell daniel is buzzing to be a dad

pierregasly: where was my invite?? I thought we were friends

carlossainz55: and mine!

georgerussell63: me too!

landonorris: looks like we were all forgotten!

visacashapprb: enjoy the break daniel! you and y/n absolutely deserve it 🏁🩷

username15: i speak for all your fans when i say keep the holiday photos coming pls

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by ynusername, georgerussell63 and 920,355 others

danielricciardo: mum and dad 🔥🥺

tagged: ynusername

58,429 comments

landonorris: adopt me pls, im less problematic than a baby

danielricciardo: @/landonorris debatable

lewishamilton: so glad to see you both so happy, good luck with everything

charles_leclerc: wow!! y/n looks insane (suppose you look alright too daniel!)

ynusername: mum and dad?? i can definitely get used to hearing that 🤩

alex_albon: it’s not fair how adorable you two are, this kid is hella lucky!!

username16: pls keep the baby spam coming, you guys are the sweetest 🍼💫

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liked by lilymhe, yukitsunoda0511 and 109,446 others

ynusername: the many faces of a man who has just remembered he’s just signed up for no sleep for the next 10 years 😂

tagged: danielricciardo

23,201 comments

danielricciardo: after all I’ve done for you, this is how you repay me? you just wait my love 🫢

ynusername: @/danielricciardo this was too good of an opportunity to miss

carlossainz55: make the most of that middle photo whilst you can danny

georgerussell63: you have NO idea how much I just laughed at this y/n 😂😂😂

schecoperez: speaking from experience, you could not be more correct y/n #dannynosleep

username17: embarrassing dad before even becoming a dad 😬

oscarpiastri: call me for anymore embarrassing daniel pics 😂

danielricciardo: @/oscarpiastri no one asked for you to show up here

username18: I just want you to be my mum and dad instead 😭

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by oscarpiastri, carmenmmundt and 113,999 others

ynusername: can you believe this man is really about to become a father?? 🤦🏻‍♀️

32,694 comments

charles_leclerc: sometimes i really do wonder what you see in him y/n

landonorris: the biggest clown known to man, still the world’s biggest kid 😂😂

danielricciardo: is that really how you want to talk about the father of your child? I thought you were supposed to love me

ynusername: @/danielricciardo i do, ily very much 🥰

username17: not y/n releasing all the humiliating photos of daniel now they’re about to be parents

username18: y/n’s clearing the phone album for baby spam and giving us daniel spam in return

logansargeant: more to the point, this is the guy you chose as the father of your child??

lilymhe: the two of you are perfect for each other y/n ❤️

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by ynusername, oscarpiastri and 1,403,407 others

danielricciardo: welcome to the world baby ricciardo 💕

after a lot of hardships and tricky times, y/n and i are beyond excited to share with you that our little one is here. everyone is safe, loved and doing well, my heart has never felt so full 🥺

tagged: ynusername

 ˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗

[writingwisterias]

Okay so hear me out ( hello first, where are my manners )

but rly hear me out : Leon and the reader, the reader is pregnant, and the baby is born on September 30th. Like I can’t be the only one who thought about it ? Anyway, please don’t die I love your stories.

stay hydrated folks

Hello!

I actually love this, I could feel the angst and fluff. I will try not to die 🫡 I hope you enjoy and have a good day! And everyone that sees this is your reminder to drink water or anything please (Not proof Read I'm sorry it posted before I got the chance!)

I'm so sorry for how late this is please forgive me! I wanted to flesh it out a bit

Warnings: Fluff, Angst, Pregnancy, Child birth (Not graphic), PTSD, Establsihed Relationship

ID!Leon Kennedy x AFAB!Reader

The red circle on the calendar was just a constant reminder to him. Not only because of the impending arrival of his child. But also of that one fateful night -- the day that changed his life. He would spend the entire year trying to forget about it and think of anything other than this. It was the devil's work he swore in that doctor's office when the date was announced. He watched you freeze, a fake smile now replacing the real one you had when you entered the office. Leon hated that one date could still have so much effect on the two of you. 

You grasped his hand during the rest of the appointment, and you watched as he sunk into himself, his eyes turning hazy as he dissociated. Your fingers squeezing his desperately trying to get him to come back. You would never blame him, the horrors he had been through were enough to break a thousand men and he was still here. You had asked him years ago to explain everything to allow the secret he had kept so long to be heard by someone he trusted to help him heal. Since then the pregnancy had turned into a nine-month countdown to the date. The small kicks he felt every night fought desperately against the feeling, the reminder. The life you were carrying to involve him in a never-ending circle of happiness was already trying to heal their dad. Leon was too good of a man to let this affect the relationship with the child, besides due dates can be wrong all the time. Sometimes the baby will come later, he might be lucky.

You watched him become nervous as the countdown began as you were in the final weeks of the pregnancy. It became a routine for Leon to stare at the red circle every morning as he made breakfast and coffee. Only getting worse since the date was only a few days away at this point. The nursery was completely decorated with things you had both collected yourselves and had been given in the baby shower. All of the baby grows were washed and put away, a large stockpile of diapers in the changing table ready to be used up. You were both just waiting on the baby. 

“Good morning” You spoke softly as you entered the room. Your voice is now the only thing taking his attention away from the calendar. Leon smiled at you, his oversized shirt draped over your body. “Morning” He mumbled, hand instantly smoothing the fabric smiling at the little kicks that greeted him. It wasn’t unusual for him to be awake early, his military timer being one of the things that never left him. Despite your attempts to train it out of him in favour for a few more hours in bed. “What’s for breakfast today? It smells good” You hummed sweetly looking over at the hob. 

You tried to hide it, you really did but Leon didn’t miss the twinge of pain in your face. The small adjustment you gave yourself as pain washed over you. “Are you alright?” He asked ignoring your previous question entirely. His touch was gentle a simple reminder of his support. You nodded muttering a small ‘yes’ despite your features clenched together displaying otherwise. His hand moved gently on your lower back, the movements distracting you from the pain. You knew what the date was but you also knew what the pain meant. You just didn’t have the heart to tell him yet. After spending the whole night hoping that maybe it was just a Braxton hix and they would fade away eventually. However, the world wasn’t that kind. “Love, please don’t lie to me. Not when you are this close” 

“The date-”

“I know the date…I don’t care not right now. Tell me what’s happening” 

You turned to him, finally able to stand up straighter now the pain had subsided. Leon knew what you were getting at, he’d read all the books and leaflets the doctor recommended. All to be able to recognise the signs. Leon ensured that he was as prepared as he could be but now it was happening he froze. Panic rose in his system as you had yet another contraction in front of him. The timings were too close together, you had waited for hours as he slept. Hoping it won’t fall on this date. For his sake. 

“Do we need to leave?” He asked, his voice catching in his throat. You nodded a soft chuckle leaving your lips as you held onto him, fingers digging in his arm as you let the pain subside. To his credit he worked quickly, gathering the bag and items you had prepared and putting them into the car. He was careful as he led you towards the car. One eye on the road and the other on you, pride swelling in his chest at how well you were handling yourself. He thought he would be more lost today, that the date would distract him from being present with you. It did occasionally, every time someone would remind you both of the fact the baby was arriving on your due date he would go silent. Get lost in his mind again. Only to be brought back by a softer comment from you or your touch. The same way you would normally bring him back after spending years with him.  

When getting himself coffee or ice chips for you; he would make sure to avoid the ER, the screams triggering his flashbacks. You were proud of him, he never let it show. Despite the circumstances, you knew he would be the best partner you could get in this situation. 

You tried to hold back from making any sound but the more you needed to push the louder you got. He didn’t blame you, he could see that you were trying for his sake. The hospital was already proving to be challenging with all of the other mothers throughout the day going through the same process just a few rooms down. Leon could feel your attempts to be silent in the way you gripped his hand. You saw Leon wince at every moan and flinch at every scream you made. It didn’t help the baby was progressing slowly meaning the process was dragged out. It seemed like the entire day was attempting to make this harder for him. 

Yet despite everything he still helped you through it, complimenting your progress and how well you were doing. “You can do it, You are doing so good” He whispered in your hair, placing kisses not caring for the sweat that coated your skin. His kisses were cold and welcomed against your sweaty skin. You shook your head exhaustion lingering in the corner ready to take over. The final moments were the hardest for him. Leon tried so hard not to let it affect him but the room was suddenly too loud as it now filled with the baby’s cries, the nurses praising you as you also cried. The wails reminded him of all the distant ones he heard as he ran around the police station, of all the people he couldn’t save as he was trapped inside. Your deeper groans of pain sounded similar to Marvin’s as he spoke helping Leon out of the station. 

You felt his presence, but he wasn’t there, his eyes watching over you with that hazed look again. You wouldn’t hold it against him; it was enough that he was here physically. You knew he hated the hospital, the sounds of everyone injured and in pain. You’ve spent countless times trying to force him to get his sickness checked out by doctors instead of googling the symptoms. However, you knew that once the noise reduced, he would come back, and he would enjoy the moment. 

Guilt washed over him as he held the baby the small bundle watching him with curious eyes. You were asleep, having some well-deserved rest. The machines beeped around him, the noise of the hospital fading as he looked back into those blue eyes. They were so small in his arms, their head cradled perfectly in the palm of his hand. This is what he endured and fought for that night, the chance to have a life at the end of it. To have happiness and love surround him in even the smallest ways. Leon didn’t know he was going to be tracked down and blacked mailed by the government for just surviving the events of Raccoon City. Neither did he know that he was going to have to sign his life away putting what he assumed as pure luck into training. He had just watched you champion this for 9 months, endure days of morning sickness, all of the growing pains without a complaint. Looking forward to the future when you can finally hold the baby. He supposed in his own long-winded way he did the same. 

All the nightmares suddenly didn’t matter anymore, not when a positive thing overtook them. Soon to be interrupted by softer cries in the night. The small bundle he held in his arms wasn’t just a new birthday to celebrate for them but for him as well. For the new Leon that wouldn’t let that one night dictate the rest of his life, haunt him forever. It was his chance at a rebirth, at a new beginning. Not only as a husband and father but just as himself. 

[keeryhours]

real love, baby - chapter four

Billy Hargrove x female! reader

Main Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Billy Hargrove Masterlist

Summary:

Everyone at school sucks, and Billy takes some time to think.

Warnings:

Pregnancy, bullying, shitty parents, abuse

Word Count: 2.2k

A/N:

I’m so excited to be posting again!! I hope you enjoy this little chapter 💕

10 weeks pregnant

Baby is the size of a kumquat

Still nothing, you thought to yourself as you stared in the mirror. You wondered when you might see a change. You were rapidly nearing the second trimester, the weeks seeming to disappear faster than you were prepared for. Before long you wouldn’t be able to hide it anymore.

You wondered how your parents were going to take the news. Not well, that was for sure. You wondered if they would kick you out, leave you stranded and homeless while pregnant. You knew Billy would likely be no help in that scenario. Maybe Wayne would let you crash on their couch.

You cared about this baby deeply already, and you were not going to let anything bad happen to them.

You had a countdown on your calendar for the ultrasound at 20 weeks - the big one. Where you would be finding out if you were having a son or daughter. You thought it might be a boy, Eddie thought it was a girl. Either way, you were excited. You wondered if Billy had a preference, or if he even cared at all.

You rubbed your hand over your stomach affectionately, trying to wrap your mind around there being a real human baby in there. It was still so surreal, especially because you looked the same and the only thing that felt different was how often you were nauseous, and having the sorest boobs on the planet.

You wished you had the father to be excited with you. Billy. You imagined how different things would be if he was by your side, talking about baby names and looking at the cute little clothes at the store. Walking around school with his arm around you like he wasn’t ashamed. You knew that was only a fantasy.

At school, things were still a mess. You were surprised one of the teachers hadn’t called your parents about the ‘rumor’, because the whole school definitely knew by now. It was common knowledge that the Freak was knocked up - by another Freak, according to the Hawkins High population.

Eddie didn’t care. He stuck by you even amidst the gossip, knowing that it made it look true. He didn’t care if the whole town thought he was this baby’s father. He loved you as his best friend, and he loved his little godson or goddaughter. He walked around quoting The Godfather far more than you could tolerate.

You didn’t address the rumors, but you also didn’t go out of your way to pretend they weren’t true. Why did it matter? You were pregnant. Everyone would know soon enough either way.

Your teachers had definitely heard. They looked at you differently now, with pity, but Mrs. Hyde didn’t make you run in gym class anymore, so that was a win. They treated Eddie differently, too, just in a less nice way. They were harder on him in class, he couldn’t get away with anything anymore. His work was being graded much more harshly and the teachers were all short with him. He didn’t complain. Mostly.

“I can’t believe Mrs. Click really gave me an F on this!” Eddie exclaimed, flicking the front of his stapled essay. “I actually worked hard on this.”

“She’s a bitch,” you said simply, slamming your locker shut. You caught sight of Billy at the end of the hall, his eyes darting away from you the second you looked at him.

You started absentmindedly placing your hand on your stomach when you were worried or anxious, or deep in thought. It comforted you, but your classmates definitely also noticed. Billy noticed.

“Yeah, well,” Eddie scoffed, “I don’t really want to repeat my senior year a fourth time.”

“I thought this was your year?” Gareth teased, making Eddie give him an unamused look.

“It is.”

The bell rang signaling the start of class, and you closed your locker. You began walking with Eddie, Gareth, Jeff, and Grant down the hall towards your next class. The guys had become much more protective, always by your side. You weren’t thinking of much until Jason Carver stepped in front of your path.

“Hey, Freaks,” he said, a cruel smile on his face. His friends snickered behind him.

“What do you want?” Eddie asked, completely unamused.

“I was just wondering how the baby was doing,” he said mockingly. “I feel bad for it, having a freak and a slut for parents.”

“What did you just say about her?” Gareth asked, pushing through to stand right in front of Jason.

“Gare-“ you attempted to calm him, but no one was listening to you.

“I said, it’s sad this baby has a freak and a slut for parents,” Jason repeated slower this time.

Gareth was fuming. Before you could do anything, before you could stop him, he was pulling his arm back and hitting Jason right in the nose. Jason cursed as he stumbled back, hands covering his now profusely bleeding nose.

“You’re gonna pay for this, Freak!” he yelled as he stumbled off with his friends.

Principal Higgins came pushing through the crowd, his face red with anger. “Mr. Emerson,” he said. “My office. Now.”

Billy watched the whole thing from his spot next to Tommy, Carol, and Tina, who were giggling to each other. He couldn’t help it - he felt guilty. This was his fault. At least partially.

He knew things would be better for you if he told the truth, but he couldn’t bring himself to do that. He could put an end to it right there, step up and say “The baby’s mine, if you have anything to say to her say it to my face first.”

He didn’t understand why he was so cowardly. He was just like his dad said - pathetic, a failure. Billy felt it in his bones, the words his father would say if he knew. Not only what he’d say about Billy, but about you, too. If he thought it was bad at school, Neil Hargrove finding out was an entirely different beast.

He wondered what your parents were like. Did they know? Were they supportive? Or were they shitty just like his own?

Billy didn’t know what the hell he was going to do. It felt like there was no right decision, no decision that would make everything better. Truly, he wanted better for you and for the baby - his baby. God, he wanted better for this baby than he ever had. Could he do anything about it? He didn’t feel like it.

Like he was doomed to pass on his own trauma and bullshit to this kid no matter what he did. It already had his genes, which was bad enough. What was it they called it in psych class? Generational trauma? Could he continue the cycle even without being there?

He imagined himself with a son of his own. He would never treat his son the way Neil treated him. He thought of his son playing basketball just like him, going to his games and coaching the little league team - the idea made him laugh a little. He couldn’t imagine himself doing that, but- maybe.

What if it was a girl? Would he even know how to be a girl dad? He knew he would scare off any guy who ever looked her way. Men were dogs, he knew that too well.

Billy was lost in thought for the rest of the day. Tommy noticed something was up, but didn’t push the matter. You were on his mind so heavily that when he nearly walked into you leaving the school, he almost thought it was a figment of his imagination.

“Billy,” you said. “Hey.” You looked like you’d been crying. It made Billy’s chest ache.

“Hey,” he said softly. “Uh…are you okay?”

You just looked at him. “What do you mean?”

Billy looked around. “After earlier? With Jason?”

You shook your head. “It’s nothing. Nothing I’m not used to. Gareth’s in some trouble, though,” you said, laughing with no humor or joy behind it.

Billy felt like shit. He looked at you, eyes scanning your whole body. He still didn’t see anything different about you. Well, maybe one thing, he thought as his eyes lingered over your chest. He was only a man.

“How are you feeling?” he asked. “How’s…the baby?”

You sighed. “You don’t have to ask if you don’t really care-“

“I do care,” he said quickly. “I care.”

You looked at him, eyes examining his for any sign of insincerity. You found none. “If you care, then why-“

“Look,” he said, “I care about you. I care about this…the baby. I want to know how you’re doing. If I can help.”

You scoffed. “Billy, what would have been helpful is you stepping up to be a father instead of leaving me to fend for myself. What would have been helpful is you being here for me instead of leaving Eddie to take the flack for something we did. You know, not being a total deadbeat asshole.”

Billy’s eyes were wide. He wasn’t expecting all that from you. He had never heard you stand up for yourself so confidently and completely before, and he felt a sense of…pride? behind the guilt he felt for knowing your words were true.

“I’m sorry, okay?” Billy ran a hand through his disheveled dirty blonde mullet. “I just…you don’t understand.”

“What don’t I understand?” you asked. “That you don’t want to let this ruin your place as the King of Hawkins?”

“That’s not it,” Billy said firmly. “You don’t know anything about me. You don’t know how bad this would be for me if my dad-“ He stopped himself, not willing to continue.

You could physically see the turmoil behind his eyes. Something was clearly scaring him. “What will your dad do, Billy?”

He just shook his head, unwilling to say any more. “Nothing. Forget I said anything.”

And with that he turned and left, leaving you standing there wondering what had just happened. Wondering what he meant by that - you knew nothing about Billy’s personal life. It seemed like no one did.

Billy took deep breaths as he hurried out of the school. He couldn’t let anyone know he was about to start panicking - especially not his dad. Max was waiting by the Camaro when he got there, bored and playing on her skateboard.

“What took you so long?” she asked, hopping off her board and picking it up underneath her arm. She headed for the passenger side door as Billy unlocked the car.

“None of your business,” he said, making Max roll her eyes.

“Ooo-kay,” she said, buckling her seatbelt. Billy started the engine and tore out of the parking lot, speeding down the road towards the house.

“You seem pissier than usual,” Max finally said, causing Billy to tighten his grip on the steering wheel, knuckles turning white.

“Not now, shitbird,” he said, voice low, dangerous. Max knew better than to push it when he was like this.

Both Billy and Max tensed when they pulled up to the house and saw their parents were home. Great, Billy thought, just the person I wanted to see.

They both had their guards up as they walked into the house. It was quiet. Never a good sign.

When Neil flipped on the living room light switch, it startled them both. Billy sighed internally - he wouldn’t dare on the outside.

“You’re late,” Neil said. “I told you I expected you both back home right after school today.”

“It’s my fault,” Billy said quickly. Max looked up at him, worry in her eyes. “I had to talk to someone after school about a project.”

Neil scoffed. “You think I believe that shit?”

“He’s telling the truth. I saw him,” Max lied, and Billy wanted to hug her and scream at her at the same time.

Neil’s gaze darted to the redhead. “Nothing from you, Maxine. This has nothing to do with you. Go to your room.”

“But-“

“Go,” Billy hissed under his breath. Max looked up at him with something like pain in her eyes, but she turned and did as they said, gently closing the door to her bedroom.

“Billy,” Neil said as he stood, slowly walking over to his son. “What did we talk about?”

Billy clenched his jaw. “Respect and responsibility.”

“Exactly,” Neil said. “And are you displaying respect and responsibility?”

Billy wanted to hit his father in his stupid smug face. He dreamed about it. He dreamed about finally repaying him, repaying what he deserved-

His thoughts were cut off by the pain in his jaw. His head jerked to the side as his father hit him, the taste of blood springing to his tongue.

“Billy?”

“No,” Billy finally said, working his aching jaw.

“Sorry, I didn’t catch that,” Neil said mockingly. “What did you say?”

“No, sir.”

Neil looked at him a little longer, then patted him on the shoulder, stepping back. “Good. Remember that.” He turned and began walking off. “Dinner in 30, Billy.”

Tears welled in his eyes as he turned and walked into his own bedroom. He didn’t dare let anyone see. He thought about the baby again - his baby - he would never let anyone hurt them. Never. He could be a better father than Neil, show him what a father should be.

He made up his mind. He wasn’t going to be a coward anymore. He was going to be a father. And he was going to let everyone know.

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[jeminie-rising]

onigiris for valentine's

[ Inumaki Toge x Reader ]

link to AO3: [ onigiris for valentine's by JEMINIE ]

summary: "Perhaps he didn’t get a bag with a purple ribbon, but he looked at his own colour on the ribbon that was tied on your hair."

Or, it's valentine's day and you give everyone a bag of cookies with ribbons of their favourite colours apart from Inumaki. He then realises that his ribbon was actually in your hair all along.

warnings: Inumaki Toge uses sign language, Soft Inumaki, Inumaki says more than just rice balls ingredients, fluff, toge and reader being complete idiots in love, no smut!, they're both so in love, Not actually unrequited love (they just shy), Yuuta is so supportive, love confessions (finally), slow burn

characters: inumaki toge, The Inumaki Clan, Fushiguro Megumi, Itadori Yuuji, Kugisaki Nobara, Zen'in Maki, Panda, Yuta Okkotsu

word count: 6,623

authors note: hi, i know i know. It's the end of February and why am i posting a Valentine's themed one shot?

WELL BETTER LATE THAN NEVER!

sorry, i wasn't in the mood to write about love during the month of my ex's birthday lmao. so not only was i late, but this one shot might not be as good as i would have hoped. I shall come back in the future to fix it, hopefully

In the meantime though, ENJOY xx

and reminder:

sign language in this fanfic, like in all the others, is based on japanese sign language, not ASL.

this is part 3 of the Holidays with Toge series but can 100% be read on its own

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Don’t wait for someday. She’s thinking the same thing as you. - kids that fly

It has been weeks since New Year’s Eve. January seemed to pass in the blink of an eye and even worse, it seems like nothing really has changed. Not the classes they took, not the amount of times Itadori begged for you to help him out with English, not the missions you took up with your classmates, and not the way Inumaki treated you.

You started to believe everything that has happened was a figment of your imagination. His little trick and tease during the countdown to the very last second of last year, was nothing more than his way to pull a joke out of you. It’s not that it was something out of the ordinary. He liked to pull pranks on people with Panda all the time. Something Maki had to deal with every day, being the only other classmate they had that was present. Unfortunately for her, the mysterious fourth second year was always absent, making her the only and biggest target of Inumaki and Panda’s annoying plans.

But exactly because of it, they moved on from Maki and started widening their target to the first years. They started with Itadori, quite the gullible one and easier to get forgiveness from. A safe bet, you’d say. They managed to make him believe he was invisible for an entire afternoon. Even miraculously got help from Megumi, who did not want to get involved. But because it came natural for him to ignore Itadori, he indirectly added to the two’s bit.

They managed to pull one on you too. But in comparison, your prank seemed quite mellower. One day, mid-january, you came back to your room after class only to see it filled up with Christmas decorations when you were sure you put them down just the previous week. Even then, you were certain that you never really owned Santa curtains and elves bedsheets. It took you a whole two days to bring down everything.

Up to this day, you weren’t sure how it was that they entered your room. 

“I can hear you both snickering there,” Maki warned the two solidified prankers of the school, “if this is one other prank you’re planning you will–”

“It’s not!” Panda was quick to defend himself, “Toge was just making a joke.”

“If you two have so much time to joke around then might as well use that to train the first years.”

You and Nobara couldn’t help but smile at that idea. Training with a second year other than Maki? Definitely! 

Maki was a force of nature. She may not have any cursed energy but she made up for it with raw skills and talent. Nobara swore she would take ten Pandas over one Maki any day. And that she did. Maki wasn’t even done sparring with her before she ran towards Panda to start their training. You only looked at her, a little bit of betrayal in your face for leaving you behind.

Maki looked at you expectantly, now that Nobara was gone, you were next.

“I, actually–”

“Hey, guys!”

Everyone turned around but only the second years reacted to the newcomer. 

“Who is that?” Itadori asked, almost appalled, as soon as he saw Maki actually smile.

Megumi, who was the only one from the first years who has been in the school long enough to know, smiled proudly as he answered Itadori, “That’s Yuuta Okkotsu, the last of the second years of the Tokyo Metropolitan Curse Te–”

“Yeah, yeah,” Nobara interrupted him. “That’s the last of our upperclassmen then?”

“I guess...?”

With a groan Nobara let down her shoulders, “ugh, so there’s really no handsome guy in this entire school uh?”

“Hey!” Itadori pouted, but Nobara was already waving her hand, shooing him away.

“I think he’s kinda cute,” you admitted.

“Yeah, in a sick Victorian kid way,” Nobara was looking at Okkotsu from the midfield with the rest of her classmates. He was quite far from them, but she could already observe him without problems from where she stood. “He looks like he’s ready to go at any time, are we really sure he’s a special grade?” 

Megumi scoffed at her question. There was little to underestimate about Yuuta Okkotsu, and his grade was not one of them.

“Hey guys come here!” Panda waved for the first years, “let me introduce you to Yuuta Okkotsu, our classmate and friend.”

Everyone gave a small nod, all with their own reasons as to not make the first step, but overall, the cursed energy he emanated from that distance was enough to keep them away.

“Don’t worry, he’s not gonna bite,” Panda reassured them.

“Not him anyways,” Maki added, making Inumaki chuckle.

“Hello, I’m Yuji Itadori!” The pink haired boy was the first to introduce himself, you couldn’t help but wonder if he trusted Panda enough to do it or he really was just that kind of guy to not care about his own safety. The times you went on missions with him made you think it was the latter.

“Nobara Kugisaki,” she simply said, studying him with her gaze. She only let a beat pass before she added, “You’re really a special grade sorcerer?”

Yuuta could only smile at her, and with the most casual tone he answered her, “uh, yeah, I am.”

“He doesn’t look like one, does he?” Maki snickered, knowing exactly what hid behind the false appearances.

“I guess…” Nobara continued, still quite skeptical. Her reply mostly being for his appearances. “Well, my friend here thinks differently.”

Your eyes widened, “I didn’t say anything!”

“You said he was kinda cute!” Nobara reminded you. Your eyes were almost falling out of your eye sockets.

You were not the only one. Everyone present was quite taken aback by that comment. Not really expecting that at the moment. Yuuta couldn’t help but glance towards Inumaki, the boy’s face was half hidden, but he knew his friend enough to notice that little frown between his brows forming.

“And I guess you must be [name], right?” Yuuta tried his best to break the ice that was formed. You frowned at him, confused as to how he could possibly know your name. Catching on your reaction he continued, “Sorry if that sounded weird. I was away for missions, but my friends kept me updated about everything and everyone… Inumaki especially talked to me, so of course I’d know of you.” 

“Oh, well, yeah that’s me,” you chuckled, then turned towards Inumaki, his gaze was avoiding yours. He spoke about you? You quickly shook the newly forming delusions away. He must speak of every single one of you.

That’s just the kind of person Inumaki Toge was in your eyes. Sweet, kind, considerate, and so loving and caring about other people. To the point where he would limit his entire life to a few ingredients just to make it a little bit safer for everyone around him.

“Why are you here anyways, Yuuta?”

“Well, I wasn’t around for Christmas and New Years, at least on Valentine's Day I could spend it with my other single friends!” Yuuta cheered.

“Single?” Panda asked skeptically before whispering, “Is that safe to say for you?”

Yuuta could only chuckle, but you, Nobara, and Itadori were left confused. Itadori was the only one mouthful enough to bother to ask, “does Okkotsu-senpai have a girlfriend?” Others hesitated to answer, and when they did Itadori was quick to add thinking he got it wrong, “or boyfriend? …Partner, perhaps? …lover?”

“Yuuutaaa,” a screeching voice came out of nowhere bringing the three first years ready for combat, sensing the cursed energy around them becoming heavier out of nowhere.

“Calm down,” Maki warned, and you weren’t sure if she was referring to you first years who were instinctively in fighting positions, or Yuuta and whatever entity that was slowly appearing from behind him.

Everything within you, every training combat and exercise was pushing you over the edge to attack, but you hesitated. You pulled yourself and your instincts back, knowing well that if it was an enemy, your second years would be the first to react. With a deep breath, you calmed yourself down.

“Rika, it’s okay,” Yuuta was… reassuring the creature?

You frowned. Unsure how to react and even less sure what to think. Was that what made him a special grade? Was that even a cursed technique?

“Yuutaaa, why are they flirting with youuu?” 

The voice seemed to reverb until your bones, chilling your spine. But the tone seemed like that of a child throwing a tantrum, something about it seemed odd. It wasn’t until Panda started explaining the situation that Nobara placed her hammer back in her belt and Itadori let go of his tight fists.

“Sorry for having spooked you,” Yuuta apologised quickly after the explanation.

“It’s alright!” Itadori was the first to smile at him, “I understand your predicament.”

“Predicament uh, big words from you,” Megumi scoffed. “Trying to impress or something?” 

“Shut up,” Itadori gritted his teeth.

The second years all laughed, and Yuuta went back to the topic he was hoping to have since he came, “anyways, I was hoping we could all do something for the fourteenth? It’s a Friday so we all could go do something after classes…”

“I think that’s a fun idea!” Itadori cheered at the thought of being able to go out with his friends, “Maybe we can watch a movie?”

“I would love that!” Yuuta smiled fondly at the pink haired boy, “It’s been ages since I’ve been to the movies…”

“I’m going if we’re not watching one of those weird movies with long ass titles you like,” Nobara sighed.

“I heard they’re making a release of rom-com movies for the week of Valentines,” you brought up the ad you recently searched. It was in your plans to invite Inumaki for a date, but you knew that was never going to happen. This group activity could be the closest thing you could get to seeing him during Valentine’s day.

“Perfect!” Itadori looked through his phone to buy tickets for everyone before anyone could even agree on coming.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

You were a coward.

Or at least that’s what you have been thinking of. Hiding behind the opportunity of hanging out with everyone to avoid confessing your love and asking Inumaki on a date. Both Panda and Nobara have been cheering for you since the winter holidays to take a step, and you were sure that this Valentine’s was going to be your perfect opportunity. However, it all went to smoke when Yuuta came around (you pathetically excused yourself). Or maybe he gave you the opportunity to see Toge on Valentine’s day without having to confess your feelings. 

With this new motivation you thought of what you could possibly do to make the day a little bit more special for him. Maybe a Valentine’s gift was going to be enough? Or was that too forward?

You thought of giving him chocolate. But only giving him while giving others nothing felt kind of weird. So you started making everyone some cookies, something different from his but still made from the heart. But by the time you made everyone a pack of cookies, you noticed how his chocolates paled in comparison to homemade cookies. Sure you didn’t want his gift to stand out, but now it seemed like it was too little.

You racked your brain over what else you could do, but before you realised it, the first few rays of sun came through the window and you knew you had no more time to do anything else. You still had to prepare to go to class and fix the kitchen. With a calming breath, you told yourself that you’d have time during the lunch break. So without battling yourself over it for longer, you quickly cleaned the utensils and counter you used.

You almost didn’t make it to class in time, but fortunately, your training as a sorcerer was helpful to you in more ways than just fighting curses. Classes that day went smoothly. Well, not smoothly, more like they were just background noise for all the thoughts you were getting for later than day.  

“Hey let’s have lunch at th–”

“Sorry but I have to do something right now!” You said running away already, giving them no time to say anything. 

“Where is she going?” Panda asked, confused to see you running away.

It wasn’t often that everyone would have lunch together. Usually it was first years with first years, and second years among themselves. Often everyone would have their lunch alone too as they had their own things going on. But that was one of the rare times when Okkotsu was home from his long term missions, so they all decided to take advantage of that by spending more time together.

“We don't know either…” Itadori admitted.

“Girl things?” Megumi offered it as an excuse but he honestly didn’t care much. Compared to Itadori, he trusted you to do stuff on your own without getting in too much trouble.

Inumaki stayed quiet, not even offering an ingredient as an addition to the conversation as he usually does. The only one noticing his gaze fixed on you running away towards the dorm rooms was Yuuta.

“She’s probably okay,” he reassured his friend by putting a hand on his shoulder. “She doesn’t seem the kind of person to go through troubles by herself.”

“Tuna tuna,” the boy replied, his gaze lowering to the chocolate he hid in his pocket.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

Other than your absence, the break went quickly and without a hitch. Everyone had a laugh sharing stories with each other. While for the afternoon classes, you were, once again, tardy, but nothing too outrageous to get the teachers to complain. Their annoyance seemed dissipated thanks to the sweet smell that came from the big paper bag you had with you.

Itadori couldn’t help himself, he had to ask about it. He leaned to the side and whispered closer to you, “What do you have there?”

“It’s just a little gift,” you giggled to yourself.

“It’s for Inumaki-senpai, isn’t it?” Nobara leaned in to join the conversation.

“Aww dang,” Itadori pouted back into his seat, his groan a little too loud catching a stern look from their teacher. He lowered his voice again, hoping it would be low enough to not be reprimanded despite knowing he could be heard anyways, “I wanted something too…”

“Just wait for later!” You tried to keep your voice low.

Patience wasn’t one of Itadori’s virtues. He kept poking at you during class, after class, on the way to the cinema, and when they were in line to claim their tickets. The others weren’t phased by anything at this point, especially when it came to Itadori, but Yuuta was new to the bunch.

“You guys seem like a good pair,” he said, smiling at you and Itadori. There was only a beat, before he realised his choice of word and had to add, “I meant that as a like platonic pair –like good friends–”

“Yeah,” Itadori laughed, “I imagined.”

“But what are you guys doing?” He asked, “Is this a normal occurrence?”

“More than you’d think,” Maki sighed. 

“It would stop if you could finally spill the beans,” Nobara poked at you. “What are you hiding?”

You looked at the remaining line for the movies. There was still quite a line, pairs of people for the most part, and those that weren’t were a group of girls celebrating in pink –galentines, you thought. There would be enough time before your group’s turn so you decided to take the opportunity at your grasp.

Putting down the paper bag, you started grabbing the elaborated pink bags tied each with a different coloured ribbon. Analysing the colours of the ribbons, you started to distribute them to all the different members of the group.

The green one to Maki. You assumed she’d prefer a darker chocolate flavour, given how much she enjoyed coffee in the early mornings. Similarly to Megumi’s, which was tied with a teal ribbon, who received coffee flavoured cookies from you.

In your hand you still had a red ribbon confection and there was no question to who it would go to. Even Nobara was eagerly looking at the bag with her favourite colour. The girl grabbed it from your hand before you could even offer it to her. Soft and chunky cookies inside, just like she likes them. Similar to hers, but bigger in size, was Panda’s. His bag was also the biggest one among the ones she held. A black ribbon wrapped around it tightly. 

After giving Panda his bag, there were only two more remaining. Yuji awaited his turn impatiently, his feet marching in place as a way to stimulate his eagerness. You almost wanted to keep his bag to tease him, but his face made you guilty enough to give his next. A bag adorned with a pink ribbon, and different flavoured cookies inside to reflect his chaotic nature. 

“Yaaay! Nothing beats homemade cookies!” He celebrated them above everyone’s head the moment he had them in hand.

Everyone chuckled at the boy, his enthusiasm contagious to everyone. But it wasn’t enough to keep Toge distracted for long. He looked at the last bag you held in hand, and could smell the sweet sweet cookies that fought their way out of the white ribbon.

“And this one…” you held the bag in front of you, “is for you!”

It wasn’t only Inumaki who was speechless, but among everyone was Yuuta, who hesitantly reached out for the bag you were handing him, “Me…? I–I wasn’t expecting anything… we–”

“Of course you get some too!” You laughed as if it was an obvious thing.

“Uh… how about Inumaki-senpai?” Itadori pointed out what everyone was thinking.

At his question, a dust of pink blush, similar to his ribbon, tainted your cheeks. You were trying to avoid doing this in front of everyone, but with everyone’s eyes on you, you had no choice. You opened up your purse, instead of the paper bag, hesitantly, hoping for an escape. And there it was, like the Gods answered your prayer.

“Next!” The lady called out for them.

This was enough to grab everyone’s attention to the cashier lady. In between busy choosing the movies and which seats to take, you took this opportunity to grab the purple tupperware from your purse and push it against Inumaki’s side.

“For you,” you whispered. “Happy valentines, Inumaki-senpai.”

You didn’t even let him say anything before you rushed your way after the other first years, who were arguing if it was better to have all seats in one row or take two rows of equal numbers.

“She gave you… tupperware?” Panda peaked over Inumaki’s shoulder, “Are the cookies inside?”

Inumaki could only shrug his shoulders. Some part of him wanted to have a cute bag with a ribbon too, but he shoved that feeling aside. He was about to eat cookies you prepared for him, who cared what they came into?

He carefully opened the tub but instead of the sweet smell of cookies he smelt the familiar scent of… onigiri?

The two looked at the tupperware container holding two rows of onigiris carefully placed over purple sheer paper. There was a moment of silence between them as they stared at the rice balls, before Panda started laughing dropping on the floor, catching the attention of people around them.

The silver haired boy could only frown and send a kick to his friend, “Bonito flakes!”

But the panda only laughed more at the unintended pun, “t-that’s right! There are bonito flakes –This may be the best prank ever!”

Toge looked back at the tupperware to notice one of the onigiris to have bonito flakes on top of it. That wasn’t common to have from store-bought onigiris –these were home-made, he concluded. With one look he searched for you among the first years, unsure truly how to react or feel about the gift he received. Although, once found the little bow on your head amongst the others, his doubts were somehow cleared. 

How could he not have noticed before? 

“What’s your favourite colour, senpai?” You once asked him once when the flowers were blooming and offered a various range of colours for him to pick on without having to speak out loud.

Inumaki looked pensive for a bit. Then pointed at a violet that was by her hand, “tuna mayo.”

You followed his finger with your gaze. For a second you thought he referred to your new set of nails, but then noticed the violet in between your pinky and ring finger. 

“Violet?” You asked to clarify.

He gave a single nod, “Salmon.”

“It’s a pretty colour!” You affirmed, “they’re similar to your eyes…”

Inumaki was once again grateful for the collar that hid his face and his red. Hoping to change the attention from himself to you, he pointed his finger back at you, “mustard?”

“Me?” You asked before thinking about it. You aren’t sure why you had to think about it. You knew what your favourite colour was. It has always been white. The infinite possibilities white could hold is far too alluring for you to not have it as your favourite colour. But after seeing the purple in Inumaki’s eyes, you hesitated for a bit. What were possibilities compared to the certainty that you found in him? “W-white,” you finally admitted after a moment too long.

Inumaki looked up at the sky, his gaze pensive and they looked farther away than where you ever could, but then he pointed at the clouds. You could only nod, smiling at him. 

“Yes, like the clouds.”

He then looked down at the ground. Picking a single daisy, he offered it to you. 

“Yes, like daisies.” You reached out for it and twirled it between your two fingers, “and mongolias… and jasmines –my favourite!”

Inumaki looked at you, his head tilted, “Mustard?”

“Yeah, I love Jasmines, they smell like comfort!”

Inumaki seemed to think about something for a bit, then brought his hand to his hair, he grabbed a few strands from his bangs and looked at it making cross eyes you giggled at. Then he looked through his bangs and directly at you, “Mustard?”

You frowned slightly unsure if you understood him correctly. This seemed to not translate to you in his ingredients, so he shifted his body towards you and clearly showed his hands. Back then, he was already studying sign language from the book you have gifted him on his birthday. He was still quite choppy on his sign language but he was getting the hang on it quicker than you did.

You knew his intentions and with a focused eye, you followed his hands as he unzipped his collar down. A sign of vulnerability from him, you learned. You tried to not get entranced by the snake fangs by each side of his mouth and forced your eyes to follow his hands instead. With all his fingers together he twisted the tips of them against each other. Colour.

“Colour?” You repeated his sign out loud and he gave you a nod.

He then pointed his pointer to his teeth showing his own fangs. The small smile he formed as he signed and flicked his finger, made you almost forget what he was trying to say. You shook your head trying to regain focus, but poor Toge assumed you didn’t know that particular sign and looked up instead to point at a new cloud. Then back to your daisy that still rested between your fingers. 

You nodded and repeated the sign for the colour white by grinning your teeth out and flick your pointer finger against it. “White,” you spoke out before bringing your two fingers at each side of your cheek as you dropped your hand down, your two fingers met at the tip of your chin. “I like the colour white.” Before a pause you added without sign language, “My favourite.”

He couldn’t avoid a smile at your words. He pointed at you before repeating your own sign. You. Bringing his fingers to his chins, highlighting his snake eyes, and dropping his hand to meet his two fingers to the tip of his chin. Like. Then he pointed at his forehead.

“Y-You…” You gaped before finally realising, “...r hair.”

He nodded and you could not keep in a smile, “yes, I do like your hair colour.”

White was your favourite colour. That was not something Toge would forget anytime soon. That was the colour of his hair, the colour of the flowers you smelt like, the colour of endless possibility. Ever since that afternoon at the field of flowers with you, he has seen the colour in a different way. 

He looked at your ribbon again, the one that held your hair together, but it wasn’t white like it usually would be to match your uniform, it was purple instead. His favourite colour. The same colour as the paper that held all his onigiri safe. Perhaps he didn’t get a bag with a purple ribbon, but he looked at his own colour on the ribbon that was tied on your hair.

✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

The movie was a hit. Everyone fell in love with the characters as much as they fell in love with each other. Itadori in particular was ecstatic over the ending.

“I can’t believe she wasn’t dead after all!” He jumped as everyone followed on the way back home, “I still don’t understand how it happened…”

“Of course you don’t, simpleton,” Megumi commented a few steps behind.

“It wasn’t said in the movie!” Itadori fought him.

“There are implications!” Megumi scoffed.

As the two argued between themselves you couldn’t help but laugh. It was nice to have a moment with them like that. With studying and missions, it was hard to find a time where everyone could act like normal kids –as normal as a sorcerer could get anyways. Having a literal panda walk with you guys didn’t really keep the attention away from the group. You could only guess the things going on inside people’s heads. But you assumed, just like you did when you met him for the first time, that people thought he was just one of those people who liked to get into anthropomorphic animal costumes. 

You looked behind you to check on the said friend, beside him, of course, there was Inumaki who already had his eyes on you. You knew it was too late, but you still looked away and hoped he didn’t pay mind to you. After giving him his valentine's gift, you weren’t sure how he would react, but he hasn’t said anything and that made you more anxious.

“You should make a move,” Yuuta approached him after witnessing the very short interaction.

“Tuna?”

“You never know when it’s too late,” the boy shrugged. “Sorcerers like us don’t have the privilege of time.”

Toge couldn’t look away from his friend. He was right, with all the missions you both had to go through, even more now after Sukuna’s return, there were no promises of a tomorrow. He only had today and his feelings. And with nothing more than that, the boy gave his friend a thankful wave as he caught up to you, who walked ahead of them.

You, in turn, hoped for any kind of reaction for your gift, a comment, a sign. You weren’t really expecting a grand thank you, but nothing seemed a bit too much. Sure you walked away the moment you passed the gift, but part of you was hoping for even a nod from the distance. 

You felt a tap on your shoulder and you knew it was him.

“Kelp,” he greeted you with a gentle nod.

“Hey, did you enjoy the movie?” You asked, hoping that the question would lead him astray from the thought of your onigiris. But it only did so much as he nodded again.

“Tuna tuna,” he changed the subject again, pointing at your purple ribbon.

You followed his hand, something you found yourself accustomed to at that point. “Ah yes, it’s new, do you like it?”

He paused before nodding at you, “salmon.”

“Seems like you hesitated there,” you chuckled, teasing him, but it didn’t seem to budge him at all.

“Onigiri,” you heard him say, that new word made you almost snap your head towards him in surprise. You weren’t quite sure if he meant that literally or if he was using new food-related words to communicate his thoughts. With a slight frown you tried to look for the answer in his subtle expressions.

“Onigiri…?”

He nodded, grabbing the tupperware you gave him from his bag, “onigiri.”

“Oh,” you nodded, “yes, onigiri.”

He then placed the tupperware back into his bag, allowing him to use his hands for signs. You watch him as he placed his left hand flat over a pointer finger directed towards you. With one single movement, he pointed towards you. Why?“Why onigiris?” you asked clarifying, he hummed at your interpretation. “Well, I thought you’d like to have onigiris, I just assumed they were your favourites since you chose the ingredients to be your vocabulary… Did I get it wrong?” “Bonito flakes!” Your worried expression made him shake his head as quickly as he could, hoping to shoo away your doubts. “Tuna mayo.”

“Yeah,” you chuckled. The sound of your light laughter was too soft for Inumaki to hear over the chatter of the people around. Especially with Itadori having a full conversation with Nobara right in front of you. He had it in mind to curse them to shut up for a second, just to hear your giggle better. But he quickly moved that bad idea aside when you spoke again. “Each of them have different ingredients inside, I made one of each of the ones you mention the most –There are two of tuna mayo, your favourite.”

Toge could only smile fondly at your words, his chest fluttering with affection towards you, even more than before. He thought about the savoury snacks he had in his backpack, and then of all the cookies and chocolates that were being exchanged throughout the nation at that moment, and he felt like he had the best deal out of all of them. You didn’t simply give him chocolate, like he initially would have wished for, but took time to think about what he would have liked most and actually make it. He puffed his chest lightly at the new treasure he held in his bag, eager to take a taste of them as soon as he could.

“Do you like it?” You asked, looking at him, as you all walked down the street, now closer to your school, “Maybe I should have given you cookies too…”

“Bonito flakes!”

“So you’re okay with it?”

He smiled at you, and he looked around before placing a hand on your shoulder. You looked at him in slight surprise, but his gaze was directed towards Panda, “Tuna tuna.”

The friend smiled at him and gave him a single nod, as the others continued to walk away. You saw Panda pulling Itadori away by his hood. Something about wanting to watch being mumbled away. Without Itadori and the rest, there was a soft silence around you, realising how much quieter things were when it was only you and Inumaki. Nothing awkward, just peaceful. But what did warrant for such quiet and for your friends to go ahead without you both? Your delusions were already jumping everywhere, and you had to push them away before you could get ahead of yourself.

Your gaze turned back to Toge, who had his eyes already on you. “Is there something wrong?” You asked unsure. You felt like there was something to be said, but couldn’t bring yourself to take the first step to leading the conversation.

He shook his head, before zipping down his collar. You were quite sure that he was going to use Sign again, so you followed his hands closely to focus. But to your surprise, he brought his fingers to your chin and gently pulled your face up to meet his eyes. 

This simple gesture was enough to cause you to sweat cold. You fidgeted with your fingers hoping to distract yourself from his, that were still on your chin. 

“Inumaki-senpai?” You asked hoping he would finally get to the point. You weren’t sure how much longer you could handle being so close to him without breathing.

He took a step back, much to your health. But his gaze was still fixed into yours, silently guiding you to not look away. Not that you could even if you wanted to, his eyes were as hypnotising as that of a snake luring a prey.

Then he did what you didn’t expect him to, he began to open his mouth.

“I…” he attempted, “have been practicing.” 

You swore your heart stopped the moment he opened his mouth and began to beat only at each word he spoke. Unsure if you were supposed to ruin the moment, you kept quiet, not daring even to move a muscle, afraid you might miss something.

He seemed to be thinking about it for a bit, then with careful breathing, he spoke again, “I have been practicing, to not infuse my words with cursed energy.” He paused as he breathed in a big chunk of air. You wondered if it took a lot of him to do so.

“That’s amazing, senpai,” you said before you even realised you were talking. Perhaps when Inumaki could talk, it was you who was rendered speechless. You looked for words to say as he smiled at you clearly quite proud of himself. “Since when?”

He paused before answering. For the first few times he did so, you thought it was because he was thinking about what to say, but it seemed like he was actually selecting which words to use. Despite him keeping from infusing his words with cursed speech he still deliberately thought of words that were still relatively safe to speak, just in case. 

“Since New Year’s Eve,” he carefully enunciated his syllables.

You couldn't contain your own smile, “You’ve made amazing progress!” 

He smiled back at you and gave a small polite bow, “Tuna mayo.”

You giggled at his favourite onigiri ingredient. Perhaps he was still more at ease with speaking like that. And to properly show his gratitude, he was going to do it with ease.

Then he took another deep breath in and nodded to himself. You watched him patiently, hoping for more words from him. It was cold, middle of february but spring was still so far away from arriving in the hills of Tokyo. But you paid no mind, you could stay there for an entire day and a night if it meant that you could have a conversation with Toge.

“I wanted to be able to speak properly with you,” he said after having attentively selected his words. He imagined everyone would practice their speech to themselves and to a mirror before giving it, and although he did so too, it still didn’t feel enough for him. Nerves got to him quickly as he inched closer to where he was aiming. He looked at you, hoping to gain courage from it, but it only made him even more nervous. 

In the long pause, you assumed he was done, so with a small smile you tilted your head, “that’s sweet, Inumaki-senpai.”

“Wait–” he shook his head, “Ikura.”

Your eyes widened slightly, shutting up. It was faint, but you felt the tingle of a cursed energy in his ‘wait’. It didn’t hurt, you noticed, his cursed speech never did hurt you. But it was an odd sensation crawling into your skin and grabbed onto your very muscle cells, forcing you to comply by pure force. There was worry in his eyes, as he noticed it too, but you smiled at him hoping to reassure the boy. With a single nod from you, he was able to breathe again. Perhaps your actions too had the same effect on him as his cursed speech. It took so little from you for him to change emotions and follow your silent commands.

“I wanted to tell you so many things,” he continued his thoughts from earlier. For the first time ever since you’ve known him, it was him speaking and you were listening. It was a dream that you never thought would be real. It made you so grateful for your world of curses, spirits, and impossibilities.

“I like the colour white too now,” he admitted out of nowhere, remembering that one afternoon in the field of flowers. 

“And I don’t actually like fish eggs…” he said, recalling that one time you offered some to him and he could only grimace at you. You never knew why he did, but now you knew it wasn’t directed at you.

“I don’t like morning assemblies,” he admitted before carefully selecting his next few words, “that’s why I never go.” –That’s why you never see me. He wished to say, knowing from Panda how often you looked for him during the assemblies. But if he said those words he was scared you would go blind, or worse, you’d never see him specifically.

He took a deep breath and then, just as he practiced, “I wanted to thank you for Christmas,” he said remembering how it was her idea to bring everyone to visit him, “and that I am sorry for taking your last grape on New Year’s Eve.” You tried to hide your smile at the memory. At the time, you were stunned and flustered, but looking back it was quite silly. But if that memory was not going to make you blush, his next words would have been enough to do so.

“And that you looked very beautiful.”

He smiled looking at you. Perhaps because he started to get the hang of it, he wasn’t feeling as nervous as earlier. But the more he spoke and the more he looked at you, he could only find more courage to spill all his secrets. To give you everything he had. To tell you every single thought he ever had selfishly hoping you’d keep them all.

“I was going to tell you on New Year’s Eve,” he continued before chuckling to himself, “but we got interrupted.”

The memory of your silent conversation on New Year’s Eve came back at you. The way he held his fingers on each side of his cheek close to expressing how he felt. You kept your eyes fixed on him, afraid to even blink. Afraid that in that fraction of a second where you blinked, your lashes might swipe him away from you or miss his words.

You had a vague feeling of what was to come. He was so close to telling you so many times that you developed so many ‘What-If’ scenarios that all of them resembled the one where you were in at the moment. You prayed to all the Gods looking over at you two, to the saint of Valentine’s day, that nothing would interrupt you anymore.

“This might be nothing compared to your onigiri, but…” You watched him as he pulled a chocolate bar from his pocket, and with another deep breath in, a solemn look, and a fond smile, he offered both the chocolate and his feelings to you, “I like you.”

[stargazedwinchester]

ִ ࣪𖤐◞ ꙳ ๋࣭ ⭑ `seen, sam winchester ༘♡

summary: you're charlie's sister, and whilst your visits to the bunker are becoming more frequent, you're oblivious that someone has a little crush. word count: 902 pairing: sam winchester x fem!reader thank you for requesting @sweetiecelin <3 I hope you enjoy!! part 1

⛧°. ⋆༺☾𖤓༻⋆. °⛧

There’s been a shift in the atmosphere when you visit the bunker now.

Dean has been more attentive — Sam more so. It feels strange coming from men that usually live in their own little world.

Charlie hasn’t said a word of it. Whether she’s noticed, too, or she’s completely oblivious.

But Sam? Sweet, sweet Sam. He’s trying his hardest to accommodate to you every single time you visit.

Upon entering, Charlie races down the stairs, tossing her duffel on the floor, greeting the brothers with huge bear hugs. You walk down comfortably, unaware of the hazel eyes staring at you dreamily. “Hey, Y/N. How’ve you been?” Dean greets, pulling you into a warm hug. His familiar scent has become a soothing one. Looking up at Sam, he flashes you an awkward smile. His dimples show lightly as he tucks his hair behind his ear. “I’m good. How’re you guys?” You reply to Dean, reaching your arms out to invite Sam for a hug. He hesitates for a mere second, but then wraps his brawny arms around you. You can practically hear his heart skip a beat.

Pulling away, you can see his cheeks are flushed primrose, and luckily, Dean isn’t facing him to make fun of him.

You’ve been talking with Sam for a few weeks, basically from the first day he brought up the underlying issues. Texting back and forth, an undeniable crush.

Dean glances over at Sam, who’s been gawking at you since you pulled away. He furrows his brows, catching Sam’s eye. He shoots him a nervous glare, and Dean nods at your question. “We’ve been good, haven’t we, Sammy?” He pats his brother on the back. “Y-yeah.” He presses his lips together tightly.

Yourself and Charlie are staying at the bunker for a couple of nights. A case has hit the news a couple towns over, so the brothers decided that everyone—including you—gets involved. The more the merrier, right?

⛧°. ⋆༺☾𖤓༻⋆. °⛧

It’s later on, some time after 11PM. You’re all slouched on the couch, eyes glued to the TV. Dean has a beer in hand, his arm hanging over the arm rest. Charlie is sitting next to him, and yourself and Sam have your own sofa. A blanket drapes over you, covering yours and Sam’s lower half. A game show is playing; a hundred thousand dollar question has flashed up onto the screen.

“It’s A.”

“You haven’t even read the question!” Charlie shoves Dean playfully. He tuts. “I don’t need to read it when I know the answer already.”

The presenter finishes the question, and the timer for thirty seconds begins to countdown. Dean and Charlie bicker among themselves, Sam deep in thought about the question whilst you’re glancing up at him, admiring him.

His brows furrow and lips frown a little, his full, undivided attention on the screen before him.

Sam’s clearly put some sort of effort into his look today. He smells as if he’s just showered, fresh laundry and a little bit of cologne. You can’t help but lean into him, his scent makes you feel so comfortable and at home.

“It’s B.” Sam blurts, a few seconds before the timer runs out.

Dean and Charlie remain quiet in the last couple of seconds before the timer runs out. The silence between everyone is humourous, Dean concentrating on the screen.

B is correct.

Dean huffs, wafting his hand in the air, taking a swig of his beer. “You cheated.” He darts at Sam, making him chuckle. “Well, maybe if you read the question right, you’d see that-”

“Or, maybe, you let other people win for once.” Dean interrupts, causing a huge squabble between the brothers. Charlie is baffled by how quickly they can get into a fight over a fucking TV show, but is cackling nonetheless.

There’s no wonder why she loves them so much, they’re like a family to her. It’s something you’ve not exactly grown up with, since you never really knew them. All you had was Charlie, and that was more than enough. But there was always a missing piece when it came to it, and that missing piece was right here.

You glance up at Sam, who’s still going back and forth with Dean. You can feel his body vibrate with laughter. A deep, hearty laugh escapes his mouth as he reaches for his temple. And for a moment, he looks happy. Content. He catches your eye, his gaze softening as you’re looking at him with hearts in your eyes. He hesitates for a mere second—before placing his arm around your shoulders, testing the waters. You lean in, resting your head on his chest. Dean notices, flashing the pair of you a knowing smirk.

“Just face it, Dean. Sam’s the smart one here. No offense, Y/N.” She points over at you. “None taken.” You say, chuckling at Dean’s reaction. Dean laughs once. “Ha! Alright, y’know what? This game’s rigged anyway. I’m gettin’ another beer.” He stands up, Charlie following behind him.

The clamor fades out as Sam glances down at you again, as if making sure you’re still comfortable against him. When your eyes meet, he flashes you a warm, gentle smile. One that’s just for you. His fingers tighten briefly on your shoulder. Neither of you say anything. You don’t need to.

And for the first time visited the bunker, you don’t feel like you’re just Charlie’s sister.

You feel seen.

[2i1han]

Slowly, Then All at Once

2 : since then

pairing: classmate!leehan x fem!reader │word count: 8.9k

genre: fluff, a bit angsty, slow-burn, young adult, coming of age, romcom

tags: boynextdoor , non-idol au, high school/college au , first love , neighbor!leehan , extrovert!leehan , cold!leehan , extrovert!reader

characters mentioned : kim leehan , park sungho , anton lee , sakai moka , kim minji , ham jinsik , kim woonhak

warnings: no warnings! sfw

synopsis : you and leehan have always known each other—classmates since ninth grade, always familiar but never really close due to leehan's indifference. but when his brother enters the picture, and you ending up in the same building as him, everything starts to change. unresolved situation that were once buried begin to surface, and leehan must decide: let go or finally take a chance.

a/n : hi, everyone! this is the second full part for my series. and, i just wanted to say thank you to all those who read the first part and supported it ! i love you all so much 𖹭 i hope you'll enjoy this part as much as i enjoyed writing it.

playlist : seasons/wte , the first words/song yuvin , a little bit more/jinho , everyone adores you/matt maltese , so let's go see the stars/boynextdoor , but i like you/boynextdoor , so tender/say sue me , bad/wte , light/wte , chocolate/bol4 , some/soyou , would you love me/stella jang , everyday/haebin , star drawing/yuziii

the countdown to graduation had begun. it's the first weeks of october, and the air is starting to get cold, as well as the trees turning bright orange. five months left, and summer vacation was already waving hello from a distance like a blessing. but instead of enjoying the thought of freedom, everyone was drowning in piles of textbooks, mock exams, and late-night study sessions for the csat entrance exams. the entire school felt like it had turned into a pressure cooker, students running on caffeine and stress as they prepared for college entrance exams.

and you? you were no exception. while others buried themselves in past papers, you were sacrificing sleep at ungodly hours, struggling to piece together the perfect art portfolio for your university application. between exam prep, graduation rehearsals, and finishing last-minute school requirements, you barely had time to breathe.

so when the weekend rolled around, you decided to reclaim a small piece of your sanity. you swung by moka's apartment, planning to meet up with her and minji— your first proper hangout in weeks.

moka sat at her vanity, delicately patting powder onto her face like she was about to go on a magazine shoot instead of a casual outing. she glanced at you through the mirror.

"how's your portfolio going?" she asked, dabbing her nose with a fluffy brush.

you sighed dramatically, flopping onto her bed like a tragic indie. "it's fine… i guess. i just don't think some of my existing pieces are good enough." you groaned, rubbing your forehead. "that's why i'm still trying to make new ones."

moka immediately turned to face you, her expression is a mix of disbelief and exasperation. "you can't be serious." she put her powder down as if you had personally offended her. "y/n, you're literally at the top of your class when it comes to art. even the professors are obsessed with you!"

she wasn’t wrong. you had consistently won every art competition, and teachers practically worshipped your skills. but self-doubt was a clingy little parasite, and no amount of external validation could change the way you fixated on the tiny flaws in your work.

you just shrugged it off, knowing that moka will again hit you with the every art has flaws.

"yeah, whatever." picking up your phone from the bed, you scrolled through your messages. "is minji still not coming?"

moka hummed in response, too focused on applying her false lashes to spare you a damnm

right on cue—

ding dong.

"speak of the devil," you muttered, tossing your phone aside before getting up to open the door.

as expected, minji stood there, slightly breathless, her denim jumper speckled with dried paint. her hair was in a messy bun, strands of hair flowing like they had given up on being tied.

"sorry i'm late," she panted, stepping inside. "extracurriculars ran long."

you closed the door behind her, eyeing the paint stains on her clothes. "mhm, looks like it," you said, plopping back onto the bed as minji took a seat on a wooden chair—probably to avoid ruining moka's fluffy pink bedsheets.

"so," minji stretched her arms, "where are we heading?"

"the new café on the next street," moka announced, wiggling her eyebrows. "i heard their pastries are the real thing."

you perked up. "sweet. i've been craving sugar." you lazily raised your phone above your head.

on the other hand, minji groaned. "i'm on a sugar diet, but fine." she crossed her arms. "where did you even hear about this place?"

that's when moka's expression shifted into something far too smug for your liking. "my friend told me," she said, twirling a strand of her hair. "i wasn’t interested at first, but then she mentioned that the barista there is handsome."

you and minji immediately shared a look.

"...ewww," you both deadpanned, cringing.

"the pastries better be actually good, or we're leaving you behind," you warned, stifling a laugh.

moka just shrugged, grinning. "gladly. more eye candy for me."

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

the three of you stepped into the café, immediately greeted by the warm interior, a contrast to the chill autumn air outside. the place had a cozy ambiance—soft lighting, large window panes letting in the golden hues of the late afternoon sun, and walls painted a light coffee brown. it wasn't a huge place, but spacious enough, with about eight tables spread around the room. the scent of freshly brewed coffee and baked pastries hung in the air, making your stomach grumble slightly.

you glanced around as the three of you settled at a four-seater table by the window, the perfect spot for people-watching and rating cars driving by.

"i'll order. what do you guys want?" you asked, tapping your fingers lightly on the table.

moka and minji hummed in thought, their eyes drifting to the digital menu displayed on the right wall.

"just a hot cocoa for me. and for the pastry… let’s just get a whole tiramisu cake," moka decided, leaning back in her chair.

minji nodded in agreement. "that'll do. i'll get an iced americano."

"alright," you murmured before pushing yourself up from your seat and heading toward the counter.

the café wasn't too crowded, only about three other customers were seated inside, all quietly sipping on their drinks. you were the only one at the counter, so you took your time glancing at the overhead menu, even though you had already decided.

i'll just get what moka did, you muttered under your breath before shifting your eyes left and right, scanning the empty counter. you were mildly curious about this so-called handsome barista moka had been fawning over.

and as if on cue, the door to the employee's room swung open.

there he is. the legendary ‘handsome’ barista.

you blinked, suppressing a chuckle. if this was moka's definition of handsome, then water must be dry.

the guy was tall, his jet-black hair falling slightly over his forehead in a way that looked both effortless and intentional. his skin was clear—flawless, even, and his nose was sharp enough to cut glass. fine, maybe some points there. he wore a light cream polo under a black apron, the typical café worker drip.

he caught your gaze and immediately approached, his expression was smooth and light.

"what'll you have today, miss?" his voice was gentle, and polite, almost overly refined like he was a nobleman in disguise.

you almost wanted to laugh, but instead, you matched his energy with a small smile. "two hot chocolates and one iced americano. all medium-sized."

"andd… pastry?" he tilted his head slightly, still smiling.

"one whole tiramisu cake," you confirmed.

the barista nodded enthusiastically before punching the order into the register. "that'll be 43,000 won, miss."

you handed him your card, watching as he swiftly swiped it before handing it back.

"thank you. you can take your seat; i'll bring your order to your table," he offered, gesturing toward the seating area.

you nodded and turned around, only to be met with the sight of moka practically jumping with excitement, her eyes locked onto the barista like he was a rare artifact in a museum.

rolling your eyes, you made your way back and sat down next to minji.

"he's not even that handsome," you commented, scrolling through your phone absentmindedly.

moka's head snapped toward you so fast you feared she might get whiplash. "this is exactly why no guy approach you anymore," she deadpanned. "do you know how many hot guys in school have tried to get with you, only for you to brutally reject them and tell us that they weren't ‘handsome’?"

minji, ever the slightly neutral party, simply nodded in agreement. "i mean… she's got a point." shhe paused for a second before stealing another glance at the barista. "he is handsome. you're just bitter."

you sighed, sparing another glance at the guy, who was now carefully scooping out the tiramisu from the pastry window. "fine. i'll give you two some credit. his skin is nice, and he's got a decent nose. other than that, nothing special."

minji leaned back against the windowpane, while moka let out an exaggerated ugh. her dramatic reaction was short-lived, though, as her smile suddenly creeped back in two times wider than the last. you didn't even have to turn around to know what that meant.

the barista was approaching.

"here's your order, miss," he said, setting the tray down with grace.

moka, in true moka fashion, didn't even glance at the food. her attention was zeroed in on the barista's face, studying every detail like she was going to write a dissertation on it.

you nodded in thanks, ignoring the way the barista's gaze lingered on you for a good three seconds before he walked away.

as soon as he was out of earshot, moka sighed dreamily. "oh my god, he's so handsome."

you picked up your fork and stabbed your slice of tiramisu with a blank expression. "sure."

moka's face flattened as she swirled her straw in her drink. she exhaled dramatically before giving you a pointed look.

"is this all just because of your poor eyesight?" she asked, as if genuinely concerned for your well-being.

minji, mid-sip of her iced americano, nearly choked, letting out a half-laugh, half-cough.

rolling your eyes, you adjusted your thick-framed glasses, the same ones you had stubbornly worn since middle school, despite constant suggestions (or rather, bullying) from your friends. "please. i'm planning to switch to contacts soon."

moka gasped, clutching her chest like you had just declared peace. "finally! maybe then you'll see the world properly, or, see hot people properly.”

you raised an eyebrow. "the world, sure. hot people? questionable."

minji snickered while the other one groaned, shaking her head in disappointment. "you are a lost cause."

she then propped her chin on her hand, a dreamy look spreading across her face. "even his name is handsome," she dragged out the syllables in front of you.

"park. sungho."

minji side-eyed her. "wow, how do you even know his name?" she scoffed before you could ask the exact same question.

moka rolled her eyes like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "duh, it's on his name tag. didn't you see?"

minji snorted. "i barely looked at him. ask y/n, she was at the counter."

both of them turned to you expectantly.

you blinked at them before shoving another forkful of tiramisu into your mouth. "nope, didn't notice."

moka's jaw dropped "unbelievable. you were standing right there!"

you chewed slowly, shrugging. "was focused on the order. priorities."

minji let out a snort while moka threw her hands in the air. "whatever, you're so boring. let's just enjoy this before i lose my mind." she said, stabbing a fork on the cake.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

by the time the three of you had inhaled the cake and drained your drinks, minji let out a satisfied sigh, wiping her mouth with a napkin.

"mhm, okay. this is actually the real thing," she said, stretching her arms.

moka leaned back proudly, folding her arms. "told you."

you hummed in agreement as you swirled the last bits of your hot chocolate. the tiramisu was, in fact, perfection. even the coffee was good, like it was made by someone who actually cared about their job. you hated to say it, but maybe moka's handsome barista had some redeeming qualities beyond his face.

just as you reached for a napkin to wipe your mouth, something caught your eye

something was written under it. your brows furrowed as you turned it over.

a number?

and a note underneath: "you look pretty."

you stared at it. then, instinctively, you looked back to the counter. sungho was busy now, his sleeves rolled up as he worked through a growing line of customers. his face remained completely focused, but he glanced over.

you immediately looked back down at the napkin.

minji was already pulling on her coat, and moka was, of course, checking herself out in her pocket mirror.

"all right, are we ready to go?" she asked, running a hand through her hair one last time.

"yeah, sure," minji yawned, stretching her arms.

you casually crumpled the napkin in your palm and shoved it into your pocket. no big deal. nothing to see here.

as the three of you stepped out into the street, you shook your head, exhaling sharply.

moka nudged you as you walked. "you're being weird. what's up?"

"nothing," you said quickly.

moka narrowed her eyes suspiciously, but minji cut in before she could pry.

behind you, inside the café, sungho briefly glanced toward the window, watching you disappear down the street.

then, with a small smirk, he returned to his work.

"where are we heading now? it's only 3 p.m.," minji asked as she lazily stretched her arms above her head.

moka didn't even hesitate. "the mall. come on, let's go."

minji hummed in approval, already pulling out her phone to check for any new sales.

you were just about to nod when a sudden realization hit you like a brick to the face. your sculpture. the one that was due tomorrow. monday afternoon.

"oh, crap." you stopped in your tracks, causing both of them to halt and turn to you with raised eyebrows.

"what?" moka asked, her excitement fading slightly.

you let out a tight-lipped sigh. "i just remembered, i have an unfinished sculpture in the art room. i need to finish it today. you guys go ahead without me. i'll catch up if i can."

moka's eyes immediately narrowed. "absolutely not."

here we go.

"come onnn, we barely even go out anymore! just this once, prioritize us over some lump of clay," she whined, dramatically clasping her hands together like she was pleading for her life.

"it's not just a lump of clay, moka," you deadpanned.

six pleases and ten ‘we barely go out anymore's later, moka finally sighed in defeat, crossing her arms.

"fine. but next time, make sure you don’t have any unfinished tasks, so we can enjoy the day properly, okay?" she looked at you almost pitifully, like you were some overworked corporate employee instead of a graduating student.

you chuckled, pulling both her and minji into a quick hug. "i promise. take care, both of you."

minji patted your back. "you too. don't let the clay take over your life."

with that, they waved goodbye, and you made your way to the bus stop, waiting for the ride that would take you the very place you had been trying to escape all week.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

by the time you arrived at the art room, you fully expected to be the only student who had procrastinated this badly. but as soon as you pushed the door open, the atmosphere inside shifted.

there, seated at one of the workstations, was leehan—completely engrossed in his sculpture, his hands steady as he gripped a sculpting tool.

you walked slowly, carefully making your way toward your own workspace, which just so happened to be right next to his.

of course.

leehan barely glanced at you, but when he did, it was through the gaps of his hands as he continued shaping his piece. his focus remained stable, and, predictably, he didn't say a word.

not that you were expecting him to.

it had always been like this for the past three years. silent. neutral. two people coexisting in the same space without the need for conversation.

so, treating this as just another normal day, you sat down and got to work.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

thirty minutes passed, and your sculpture was already coming together nicely. the texture was smooth, the facial anatomy was decent, and all that remained were the arms and legs.

meanwhile, leehan's progress… was questionable at best.

you snuck a glance at his work.

it hadn't moved. at least, not noticeably. the proportions were off, the limbs were… concerning, and at this point, it was starting to look more like an artifact from a horror museum rather than an academic project.

he was struggling.

you furrowed your brows. why did he even choose an art strand? was he actually passionate about it? or was this some twisted form of self-inflicted suffering?

whatever the reason, you couldn't ignore it any longer.

"do you need help?" you asked, more out of pity than actual expectation.

and honestly, you weren't expecting an answer. if anything, you thought he'd ignore you like always.

but then, like some kind of miracle, leehan put his sculpting tool down and mumbled:

"yes, please."

yes, please.

your brain short-circuited.

it wasn't just a yes. it wasn't just some bare-minimum grunt of acknowledgment.

there was a please.

was this for real? or had the painful silence in the room finally driven you insane?

but before you could spiral into that thought, you shook it off. whatever, not important. you had a job to do.

you nodded, moving over to his table as you examined his sculpture up close.

"do you even know basic anatomy?" you asked, tilting your head at the poor, disfigured limbs of his creation. it was... unique.

leehan barely glanced up. "i'm bad at it." his voice was quiet, almost as if admitting this was painful.

you hummed in response, crossing your arms.

"well," you sighed, picking up a sculpting tool, "lucky for you, i don't suck at it."

leehan smiled to himself. an actual smile.

not a forced one, but a real, genuine, pleased-with-life kind of smile. but, thankfully for him, you didn't notice. you were too busy sculpting, completely focused on saving his poor project. and honestly? he was probably relieved. if you had seen it, that carefully crafted, too-cool-to-care exterior he had built over the years might've shown some cracks.

instead, he simply stood beside you, watching as you worked with effortlessly.

"watch how i do it," you said, not even glancing up.

leehan obeyed without question, his gaze glued to your hands and the clay.

minutes passed, and the disfigured limbs of his sculpture were slowly reshaped into something actually recognizable. you worked swiftly, skillfully, and before long, you placed the sculpting tool down with a satisfied sigh.

"there," you said simply.

leehan leaned in, inspecting the piece with his usual unreadable expression. but even though he tried not to be expressive, you could tell—he was amazed.

"thank you. a lot," he said, his eyes locking onto yours.

for a second, you weren't sure how to respond. compliments weren't exactly his thing, and hearing him say a full, properly structured sentence felt almost weird. so you just offered a small, awkward smile.

"it's nothing," you muttered.

then it's followed by silence.

it wasn't awkward, per se, but it felt different from your usual shared quiet. like something was waiting to be said next.

you hesitated before speaking. "why..."

you nearly stopped yourself, figuring leehan's free trial of words had probably expired. but when you glanced at him, you noticed that he was listening. actually waiting for you to continue.

so, you did. "why did you take art classes? i notice you struggling a lot with it... even when we're still in middle school."

the question seemed to shrink his usual confidence, or whatever distant, broody aura he carried. his fingers twitched, and his posture stiffened.

then, finally, he exhaled and looked away, focusing on the sculpture rather than you.

"my mom," he said, "she wants me to take arts."

"ohh" you simply nodded. you weren't going to push.

but you still did "don't let anyone stop you from doing what you really want," you said, keeping your voice casual.

leehan's eyes flickered down to his sculpture. for a moment, he didn't move, just absorbed your words in silence. then, he gave a small nod.

the conversation ended there, followed by another silence again. and you took that as your cue to return to your table.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

it was 6:30 p.m. when you finally finished.

your sculpture was done—polished, covered, and ready to be presented tomorrow. meanwhile, the person beside you? still in the exact same spot you left him in.

except, now, his project had actual progress. thanks to the sketch you had given him as a guide, the limbs no longer looked like they belonged in a horror exhibit. he still had a long way to go, but at least he wasn't completely lost anymore.

you packed your bag, hesitating for a second.

should i tell him i'm leaving?

you never did before. not once. usually, you'd just slip out without a word, and he never seemed to care.

but maybe, after today's surprisingly human interaction, it felt weird to just go without acknowledging him.

so, after a moment of internal debate, you finally spoke up.

"i'll get going," you said, pointing vaguely toward the door.

leehan looked up slowly.

you expected him to do his usual nod—you know, that tiny, barely-there bow that was less of a gesture and more of a muscle spasm.

but instead, he actually said something.

"okay."

not just a nod. a full, verbal response. it's flat, but at least it's a thing.

you nodded back, stepping toward the door.

as you left, you didn’t notice leehan watching you the entire way, not turning back to his sculpture until you had fully leave the room.

he has to figure it all out on his own now that his art genius classmate had left.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

ring. ring.

after a few rings, minji finally picked up.

"hello?" you said, pressing the phone to your ear while speed-walking toward the bus stop.

"hello? what's up?" minji's voice crackled on the other end.

"moka isn't answering her phone. are you guys still out?" you asked, adjusting the strap of your bag.

"nah, we just got home. her phone died," minji explained. "we're at her apartment. you coming?"

"mhm," you hummed. "i'll be there now."

"alright. don't get kidnapped. take care."

"wow, thanks for the reminder," you chuckled before hanging up.

you sat onto the bench at the bus stop, letting out a sigh. the bus was taking forever. long enough for you to consider filing a complaint. but instead, you just leaned your head against the metal pole of the shed and jammed your earphones in.

then— knock, knock.

you flinched, pulling out an earbud.

standing beside you was none other than moka's handsome barista from earlier.

"hey," he greeted, smiling slightly.

you quickly sat up, smoothing your clothes like that would somehow make you look less caught off guard. "oh, hi! uh… you're the barista from earlier." you pointed.

he chuckled, nodding. "mhm."

"are you… also waiting for the bus?" you asked, mostly just to fill the silence.

sungho let out a short laugh and shook his head, lifting the small bag in his hand. "just dropping something off."

ah, a delivery or something. not that it mattered. you were a little too preoccupied pretending not to remember the note. the one he casually slipped under your tissue at the café, complete with his phone number and a compliment scribbled underneath.

you thought about bringing it up. you really did.

but then again, what were you even supposed to say? "hey, thanks for the note, but i nearly choked on my drink when i saw it"?

yeah. no.

so instead, you awkwardly nodded. "i see. well… take care, i guess."

sungho, just nodded. he took a step back like he was about to leave, and you were about to sink back into your seat when—

"what's your name?"

you quickly looked back to him. but, before you could respond, the bus's headlights flickered behind him.

"seo y/n," you answered, flashing him a smirk.

sungho's lips curled up slightly to a small smile as the bus doors hissed open.

for a second, he looked like he wanted to say something else, maybe a take care or a see you around. but the moment passed.

instead, he just watched as you stepped onto the bus.

and when you turned back for a quick glance, he was already walking away, hands tucked into his pockets, disappearing down the street.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

"really? you met him?" moka whined, dragging out the words like she was personally offended by fate for not being there.

"yup." you threw a chip into your mouth, acting as nonchalant as possible, though moka's growing excitement was making that difficult.

minji sat on moka's bed, scrolling through her phone with the energy of someone who had heard this before. meanwhile, you and moka were sprawled on the fluffy rug, surrounded by snacks that were supposed to be for a "movie night" but had instead turned into a tea party.

"ugh, lucky. what'd y'all talk about?" moka leaned in, eyes gleaming like she was waiting for some heart-racing, k-drama-worthy story.

you frowned, trying to recall anything that might be considered even remotely interesting. "uh… he said hi, mentioned he was dropping something off, asked for my name, and… that was it."

silence, then-

"that's lame." minji finally spoke, still not looking up from her phone.

moka smacked her leg. "shut up, minji," before turning back to you with a grin "oh my god, he wants you."

you blinked. "that's a reach."

"no, because look," moka sat up with determination. "why would he even ask for y/n's name? he doesn't even know her!"

"well, no shit," minji scoffed, rolling her eyes. "why else would he ask for y/n's name?"

moka glared at her. "you're ruining the fun."

minji shrugged. "i live to bring logic into chaos."

you just shook your head, laughing. "anyway, forget about sungho. something weird happened today."

moka barely looked interested, probably expecting another "i lost my paintbrush again and i swear someone in the art department is gaslighting me" story.

but then you said the magic name.

"leehan-"

and suddenly, both of them snapped their attention to you so fast you thought you heard a crack.

"leehan?!" moka practically screeched, throwing her snack bag aside like this was now the most important conversation of her life.

"why? what happened? did he ignore you again?" minji raised an eyebrow. "thought we left that nightmare back in 10th grade."

you sighed. "no, that's the weird part. he actually… talked to me."

moka's jaw dropped. "what?"

"like, full sentences. he asked for my help with his sculpture."

moka gasped like you had just told her the school was burning down. "HE SPOKE? VOLUNTARILY?"

"yes! and not just a one-word answer. like, actual conversation. he even made eye contact."

minji snorted. "his dialogue options unlocked."

"he leveled up socially," you added. "well, he's already leveled up socially, i just meant, when it comes to me."

"okay, but what if it's a one-time thing?" moka waved a hand dismissively. "like when an npc suddenly gets good ai for one mission and then goes back to walking into walls."

you wanted to argue, but, she might be right. a part of you was curious, though. maybe it was just today, or maybe leehan had finally decided you were worth acknowledging as a human being. who knew?

so you just shrugged it all off. "guess we'll see."

and after that, the conversation shifted into something else entirely—probably a debate about whether or not one of your professors secretly lived at school. you spent the rest of the night laughing, overanalyzing everything, and eventually crashing at moka's place for a sleepover.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

and guess what? moka was right.

because by the next morning, leehan had officially reset to his factory settings.

you were sitting at your desk, mentally willing something, anything— miraculous to happen. maybe he'd give you another full sentence. mybe he'd iinitiate a conversation. but no, the universe wasn't that kind.

leehan did approach your desk, though, standing in front of you with his usual blank expression, looking down like you were nothing more than an obstacle in his path.

still, you held onto hope. you flashed a small smile, waiting for some sign of acknowledgment. instead, he just unceremoniously dropped a folder onto your desk.

you blinked.

it was the proportion guide you lent him last night. but underneath it—your portfolio.

your soul left your body for a second.

your portfolio. the one with all your hard work. the one that, if lost, would've made you spiral into an artistic breakdown and probably quit life to become a potato farmer. you must've accidentally handed it to him, and if it weren’t for leehan returning it, it would've been gone.

you almost teared up. this was an act of heroism. you looked up at him, smiling wider this time.

"thank yo—"

but before you could even finish your sentence, he turned and walked away.

you sat there, stunned.

what was that? just last night, he was behaving like a functional human being, and now he was back to being as soulless as a department store mannequin.

moka was right. again.

and just like that, life resumed its usual routine until graduation. back to square one. same old leehan. same old you.

after grad party

every graduate was at the venue, celebrating their long-awaited escape from the prison sentence called high school. of course, college was just another prison, but at least there was a vacation buffer before the next round of suffering.

you had successfully submitted your portfolio and got accepted into k-arts—your dream university. minji had also been accepted into the same university as both of you passed your portfolios together, while moka, despite sulking for two weeks over being separated from you both, eventually forgave you.

"you guys still suck for leaving me," she muttered, munching on a piece of pork.

minji sighed. "oh my god, moka, you're going to snu. people would kill to be in your spot."

"okay, but who am i supposed to bully now?"

"you'll find someone," you assured her, patting her back. "you're very talented in that area."

she sniffed dramatically. "i know, but it won't be the same."

the three of you laughed, clinking your glasses together in a toast.

tonight was lighthearted, fun, and stress-free. a concept that had been nonexistent throughout senior year. no last-minute projects. no looming deadlines. just pure, uninterrupted joy.

you were at a table with your friends, laughing, playing games, living in the moment.

and then there was leehan.

seated at the table across from yours.

you weren’t paying much attention to him at first. but then, something felt off.

you could feel his eyes on you.

at first, you thought you were imagining it. but every time you glanced up, he was looking at you.

and not in his usual indifferent, "you are but a speck of dust in my world" kind of way.

no.

this time, he looked, different. his expression wasn't blank. it was full of emotion, thoughts running through his mind. he looked deep in contemplation, like he was having an inner monologue straight out of a coming-of-age film.

your forehead started to burn under the intensity of his gaze.

what the hell is going on with him?

he didn't look away when you caught him. he just, kept watching, like he was trying to figure something out.

you tried to play it cool, raising an eyebrow at him as if to say, what?

he didn't react immediately, just kept his gaze steady. then, after a long second, he blinked and looked down, breaking the moment.

your heart was beating a little faster than it should have been.

trying to shake off the weird tension, you simply nodded at him, before turning back to your friends.

minji and moka, of course, immediately noticed.

"oh-ho," minji smirked, taking a sip of her drink. "what was that?"

"what was what?" you asked.

moka gasped, gripping your arm. "was leehan just staring at you?"

"no," you lied too quickly.

"yes, he was," minji confirmed, narrowing her eyes in suspicion. "and not in his usual i have no interest in your existence way too."

moka let out a dramatic gasp, shaking your shoulders. "oh my god, what if he likes you?!"

you let out a snort. "yeah, and what if i suddenly become a billionaire? let's stick to realistic theories."

the night went on, but even as you laughed with your friends and enjoyed the celebration, a part of you kept replaying that moment in your head.

because for the first time in years, maybe ever—leehan looked at you like you were more than just another person in the room.

THROUGH LEEHAN'S EYES

the hall is bustling with graduates—cheers, laughter, the screech of chairs against the polished floor. it's the kind of noise that usually fades into the background, something i could easily tune out.

but tonight, everything feels louder. the clinking of glasses, the bursts of conversation, the music playing through the speakers. the air smells like a mix of catered food and perfume, a scent that's oddly overwhelming.

i should be celebrating.

i mean, i managed to survive three years of this painful art strand—something i had no real passion for when i first chose it. the reason behind my decision was so dumb that i start laughing at myself whenever i remember it.

but even though i spent countless nights regretting my choice, i don't regret all of it.

well… except for some things, like i didn't valued it.

i look up, eyes naturally scanning the room, and then i see her. y/n.

she's sitting at a long table across the venue, laughing with moka and minji—who, let's be honest, have been a pain in the butt since 7th grade.

it's that time of the year again.

people are moving on, going to different universities, starting fresh. some are staying in the same city, some are leaving. everyone's talking about their future like it's something so clear, and exciting.

but tonight, none of that feels real to me.

instead, there's this weight in my chest, a combo of regret and guilt that i can't shake off.

because this might be the last time i'll ever see her. and i don't want things to end like this.

i get so lost in my thoughts that i don't even realize i've been staring at her for too long. too long to be casual.

and then, she notices. her laughter slows, her eyes directed towards me, and for a split second, i think she's about to say something, but she just nodded.

shit.

i panic and quickly look down, pretending to be interested in the tablecloth or whatever nonsense anton is talking about beside me. my heart shouldn't be beating this fast over something so small, but it is.

despite the chaos around her, the crowd, the music, the noise—she stands out.

it's always been like that.

like she exists on a different frequency than everyone else, moving at her own pace while the rest of us struggle to keep up.

like she's the only one truly living in the moment while i’m stuck in my head, always thinking, always hesitating.

she's always had this annoying ability to make everything else fade into the background.

and maybe that's why, even back in 9th grade, i couldn't help but notice her.

9th grade

"good morning, teacher," we all greeted before settling back into our seats.

"good morning, everyone. settle down," the teacher said, adjusting his glasses. "now, before we begin, i'd like to introduce a new student who will be joining us for the school year."

a wave of excitement rippled through the classroom. people started murmuring, whispering to each other like buzzing bees. i quickly turned my head toward the door, just like everyone else, but with the number of students shifting in their seats, my view was blocked.

having a new classmate sounded exciting—a small breath of fresh air after being stuck with the same faces since 7th grade.

then, with a small nod from the teacher, the new student stepped in.

she was a girl.

short hair, cut just above her neck, with soft, wispy bangs framing her round, slightly chubby cheeks. a pair of thick, round glasses perched on her tall nose, making her look a little nerdy but in a way that suited her.

then, she spoke.

"hello, everyone! my name is y/n. i'm 15 years old and just moved into the neighborhood down the street. i hope we can all be friends!"

she gave a light bow, her voice bright and clear, effortlessly filling the classroom.

and that's when i knew it.

i'm cooked.

my heart started pounding so fast i didn't even know what was happening anymore. it was like my brain short-circuited, and my body decided to go into emergency mode. my ears burned hot, my hands turned ice-cold, and before i could process it, my head snapped toward the window in an attempt to distract myself.

this was bad. really bad.

i heard the teacher assigning her a seat, and i prayed—please don’t be near me, please don’t be near me—but then

"you can sit there, next to that boy by the window."

shit. that was my seat.

but just as i was about to internally combust, a voice from the back spoke up.

"sir, han taesan sits there. he's just absent today."

oh, thank god. taesan thank you.

the teacher nodded and assigned her a different seat. i let out a silent sigh of relief. disaster avoided.

or not.

because during break time, she approached me.

i wasn't even looking at her, but i could sense her presence. i felt my muscle went tense, my back straightening reflexively. she was standing right in front of me.

"what's your name?"

oh my god.

i hesitated before looking up. and then—she smiled.

i can't stutter. I CAN'T STUTTER.

"...leehan. kim leehan," i blurted out before immediately pretending to be interested in the random writings on my notebook.

she didn't seem to mind my awkwardness. in fact, she continued talking.

"are you alone? you can sit with us!"

panic.

if i sit with her, i'll die. there's no way i can eat properly without choking at least five times in front of her.

without thinking, i shot up from my seat. "no, i'll be out. thank you," i muttered before making a quick escape. i did not look back. i went straight for out the room to find woonhak like my life depended on it.

for months, i avoided her. not in an obvious, rude way, but in a way that would save me from embarrassing myself.

every time i caught a glimpse of her from across the room, my heart started racing. i didn't know how to deal with it, so i did what any emotionally constipated 15-year-old would do: ignore her.

but then i started to notice that she was ignoring me now too. at first, i thought it was a coincidence, but the more time passed, the more obvious it became.

and honestly? it sucked.

had i ruined my chance of even being friends with her? was she annoyed with me? did she hate me now?

it was all my fault.

i kept overthinking it until i finally decided. enough is enough.

i needed to face my fears and actually talk to her. for once, i would initiate the conversation, not her.

so, i took a deep breath and walked up to her desk, where she was sitting with her friends.

thump thump.

i could hear my heartbeat—it was almost deafening.

kim leehan, calm down. this is not the time to back out.

she turned to me, blinking. she didn't say anything, just waited.

this was it. my once-in-a-lifetime chance.

"y/n, i just want to say tha—"

interrupted.

of course. of course, someone had to cut me off right at that moment. nd out of all people, it just had to be ham jinsik.

i took a step back as he effortlessly inserted himself into the conversation.

tall. handsome. confident.

there was a small pang in my chest, and i hated it. i watched as jinsik stood there so easily around y/n, talking to her like it was nothing.

meanwhile, i could barely get a single sentence out without feeling like i was going to collapse. of course.

jinsik was perfect, the perfect match for her.

i turned back to my seat, forcing myself to focus on my classmate behind me, while batting an eye on jinsik's back periodically. but before I knew it, she was standing in front of me again.

"hey," she said.

i froze.

"sorry about earlier. you were saying?"

there it was. that stupid, dumb leehan who turned into an unfunctioning robot around her.

okay, play it cool. don't let her notice.

i gave her the most casual, indifferent expression I could pull.

"…i forgot," i said flatly.

lies.

she paused for a moment, then simply nodded. "okay then."

and just like that, she turned back to her friends. i watched her walk away, my stomach physically feeling sick.

that was it?

we never talked or interacted again after that. i tried so hard to forget about it—to forget her.

but every time she was around, i felt everything all over again.

i thought we'd never cross paths again after 9th grade. but then, i overheard from them that she was going to seoul high school.

and so, like the absolute fool that i am, i shot my shot.

i took the entrance exams. i applied for the same course as her.

art, my biggest enemy.

but despite that, despite all my regrets, my awkwardness, and my absolute inability to function around her. i still got in.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

everything was a blur. one moment, i was a freshman still trying to figure out how lockers worked, and the next, i was a tenth grader, dragging my feet towards my classroom like a sloth that just learned about capitalism.

my brain was running at full speed despite my body moving at half capacity.

"what if we're in the same class?"

"you absolute goober, isn't that what you wanted?"

great. my inner voice was bullying me again.

i shook my head and picked up the pace, trying to act normal. but the moment i reached the door, i caught a glimpse of her.

inside the classroom.

instant panic. i did a full stop, took a step back, and stood behind the doorframe like some poorly written side character who wasn't supposed to be here.

okay, breathe. don't make this weird.

after a good minute of overthinking every possible interaction i could have with her in the next ten months, or 2 years even, i forced myself to straighten my posture and activated my signature move— dumb leehan exterior™. the ultimate defense mechanism. no embarrassing actions shall be performed under its influence.

i stepped in. and of course, she looked at me.

oh, god. oh, god.

do i look back? no. yes? no, okay, fine, i looked back. i knew the risk. my brain was about to explode, but i still did it.

after the long vacation, i'd be lying if i said i didn't miss her presence. so, in a rare moment of bravery, i nodded at her. a simple, casual, nothing-to-read-into nod.

and then, like the genius i am, i walked straight to the farthest seat possible from hers.

…"by god, i am an idiot."

what the hell was that? now she thinks i'm a loser.

i groaned internally but shrugged it off, pulling out a book to distract myself. a fish encyclopedia, of all things. because nothing screams casual high school student like pretending to be deeply invested in the migration patterns of a corydoras (except i'm actually deeply invested to it.)

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

12th grade

it was 1 p.m. i had been here since 11 a.m. and had made zero progress on my sculpture. at this point, the only thing i had successfully created was a misshapen lump of clay that looked like it had personally witnessed the fall of rome.

frustrated, i turned to anton, my classmate and the only person who tolerated my nonsense in the class.

"man, how do you even do this?" i whined, aggressively poking my sculpture.

anton took one look and started laughing. "leehan, that thing looks like it's about to build itself and walk away."

i rolled my eyes and flicked his shoulder. "shut up, i'm genuinely stuck here."

anton smirked, crossing his arms. "then why'd you even take this class if you suck at it?"

"dumb, personal reasons," i muttered, waving him off. "whatever, i'll figure it out."

anton just chuckled, pointing toward the door. "alright, goodluck with that. i'm heading out. see ya."

i nodded, barely paying attention as i slumped back down, staring at my sculpture like it had personally offended me. then, somewhere between my frustration and self-pity, a thought hit me.

me and y/n haven't had a real conversation in two years.

we talked, sure—about projects, pair work (which, of course, made me internally combust every time), but a real, genuine conversation? nada.

and now, graduation was near.

i wasn's sure if i'd ever see her again after this. once, i overheard her talking about universities with a classmate. she mentioned busan. and let me tell you, i was devastated.

this was my last chance. i needed to talk to her before it was too late. just once.

but before i could even mentally draft a script, the door swung open. i looked up, and of course— the classic.

it was her.

she walked in, slowed down, and went straight to her station.

okay, okay. this was the moment. no ham jinsik around to ruin it. no distractions. i had to say something. anything.

and then, she spoke first.

"do you need help?"

her voice was softer than i remembered. possibly a trap.

wait—i was supposed to initiate this. but whatever. this was a blessing. i just needed to respond in a cool, interesting way.

"yes, please," i mumbled, immediately fidgeting with my fingers.

yes, please?

what kind of medieval peasant answer was that?

but before i could cringe myself out of existence, she walked over to my table, standing right in front of my disaster of a sculpture. and next to me.

this was bad.

not because she was this close (which, okay, also bad for my heart), but because she could see my embarrassing project up close.

her eyes scanned it. she was going to judge me. i could feel it.

"do you even know basic anatomy?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

ouch. but that was fair. "i'm… bad at it,"

she exhaled through her nose, something almost like a laugh "well, lucky for you, i don't suck at it."

and then, just like that, she started molding the clay.

i watched, completely in awe. her hands moved like she actually knew what she was doing. my monstrosity slowly turned into something that actually resembled a human sculpture. a miracle.

i glanced at her hands—long fingers, soft palms, steady movements.

wait, no. do not admire her hands, leehan. abort.

i suppressed a smile. if she caught me grinning like an idiot, i'd never live it down.

minutes passed, and she finished fixing my mess.

"thank you. a lot," i said, and for once, it sounded genuine. not my usual dumb act.

the moment felt still, like everything else faded out. i might've even gotten tinnitus.

then, she dropped the biggest bomb of the year.

"why did you take this class if you're bad at it?"

crap, anton asked the same thing. i should've prepared for this. think of a good lie, leehan. think.

"my mom… she wanted me to take arts." sorry, mom.

she nodded, saying something about not letting anything stop me from doing what i like. and then, just like that, she went back to her station.

the entire afternoon blurred past.

before she left, she handed me an anatomy guide. i barely touched it—just flipped through it while it's laid on the table, so she wouldn’t suspect anything.

but the moment she walked out, i actually opened and lifted it. like a normal person.

and then, something under it slipped out. a portfolio.

i picked it up carefully, not wanting to leave a bit of dent on it. her university portfolio.

i didn't open it. that was hers. so, i just shoved it into my bag.

it was almost 7 p.m. now, and i knew i wouldn't be leaving anytime soon. i sighed and pulled out my phone, calling my brother to bring me dinner.

and as the evening crept in, i sat there, staring at my half-finished project.

i admit it. i was a fool.

i've been a fool.

all the effort y/n and i put into breaking the ice—especially her efforts, was wasted. three years, gone. and for what? because i was too much of a coward?

i wanted to tell her everything.

that i secretly admired her all this time. that i wanted to know her more. that i wanted her sns number, at the very least.

but when i looked up, she was already getting ready to leave.

she walked out with moka and minji, her silhouette disappearing through the exit.

and just like that— that was it. the last time i'd see her.

to be continued...

[scarletlizzard]

Epilogue

Sessions Series

Paring: stalker Wanda x female reader

Tags Minors DNI: stalking, mentions of a knife, smut, smidge of somnophilia, fingering, strap on use (R Receiving), surprisingly fluff. This type of relationship is super toxic, okay!!

Masterlist

A/N: Thank y'all so so much for reading this series. Truly has been so nice seeing everyones comments and reblogs (the tags kill me every time)! This was my first series and hopefully there will be more, I really enjoy writing and am happy to share with you kind people. Let me know if you have any questions, would love to know what you think!! Thanks 💚💚

New Years Eve 2018

Your senses were heightened as you became aware of a set of eyes on you. Her gaze fixated on you from across the room, behind the crowd of people that swarmed around you. You watch with a familiar spark in your chest, a sense of safety that your shadow was watching over you.

"They're about to start the countdown, I'm going to find Maria!" Natasha yells closely to your ear, breaking the eye contact you held with Wanda.

You give her a small smile and nod, "Alright, find me after!" Before kissing her cheek and giving her a short hug. You watch your best friend push through the crowd until you can no longer see her red head, and your eyes travel back to your shadow. Panic settles in when you realize she's nowhere to be found.

Around you people begin pairing off, touch hungry ones scanning the crowd for a last chance at a kiss before the New Year. A touch on your shoulder makes you smile and turn around, but instead of seeing your Wanda, you see a drunk man attempting to balance himself in front of you.

"Hi sweetie," he slurs, resting his hand on your shoulder. The '2019' glasses he wore took up most of his face, a drink in his other hand sloshed onto your shoes.

"I'm sorry, I'm looking for someone..." You groan and try to push his hand off of your shoulder. To your suprise, he keeps it there.

"I'm somebody, you found me!" His words slur together as he presses closer.

"Seriously? Get off!" You raise your voice and put your hands on his broad chest, pushing him back. It's only a second later that you feel a body pressed against you from behind, the intoxicating scent wrapping around you.

"Hey man, I'd back off." Wandas husky voice sounds from behind you, but she moves to step in front of you as the man steps forward again.

He laughs and holds up his drink towards her, "We're just having fun, you wanna join in?" He slurs again, and Wanda makes a face of disgust.

"Just go away before we do something we'll both regret," she threatens. It's then you notice her hand is behind her back, settled on what you know is a blade hidden underneath her jacket.

Instinctively you reach out, resting your hand on top of hers. You watch as her shoulders drop and her grip on the handle softens. A blush creeps up your neck as you once again realize the affect you had on her.

Who, really, was the mouse?

"Fine, fine, you two are no fun," the man mumbles with a shrug, leaving the two of you in the crowd.

Before Wanda can turn around, you wrap your arms around her stomach, hugging her from behind. You feel soft vibrations from her back as she chuckles, turning in your arms.

"Okay, little mouse?" She asks softly, her demeanor changed in an instant as her green eyes meet yours. You nod and slide your hands up to her shoulders.

"I was hoping you would show up," you bite back a smirk as she leans in. The crowd begins counting down, signaling the seconds to midnight.

10... 9... 8...

"I'm always there, you know that," Wanda rasps in your ear, placing a soft kiss just below.

7... 6... 5...

The thought doesn't bother you, of her always being there watching. Waiting. Instead of dread, you felt comfort. You knew she would always be there. One hand cups her face as she continues to leave soft kisses across your jaw.

You would take any bad, as long as you had this good. As long as you had Wanda.

4... 3... 2... 1...

As cheers errupt around you, shouting, "Happy New Year!" You waste no time pressing your lips to hers, your fingers tangling into her soft brown hair. Wanda holds you tightly against her as she slips her tongue into your parted mouth. You savor the flavor of mint on her tongue, biting down softly on her bottom lip. She groans into the kiss, and you can't help but smile.

"You're going to be the death of me, little mouse..." she sighs onto your lips, and you nod.

"You love it..." You giggle, causing her to laugh. She pulls back with an unfamiliar look in her eyes, lips parted like she wants to say something. You wait, but only watch as they pull into a crooked grin before kissing you again.

***

January 2019

Wanda peers through the darkness into the windows of your house, her figure disconcernable against the shadows.

You walk around, a prickling sensation on the back of your neck, knowing someone is watching your every move. Despite the comforting warmth in the room, a shiver runs down your spine, knowing your shadow was just outside.

But instead of fear, instead of unease, you simply walk to the front of the house and stare out the window.

Wanda remains concealed, her presence a silent observer in the stillness of the night. She looks with curious eyes before realizing what you were doing, and a smirk forms on her face.

Your hands move to the locks, opening them up with a 'click'. As you stare off into the shadows, a sense of vulnerability washes over you, the feeling of leaving the windows unlocked. You have to lock and unlock it three more times before you're comfortable.

"Little mouse.." A whisper in the dark, a body next to yours as you stir in your sleep.

You could've sworn it was a dream as her hand traveled down your body, cupping your clothed pussy. She ran small circles over your clit, the clothing between become wetter. You felt your skin burn under the covers, aching for her as she teases you. Then her hand slides inside of your pants, rubbing against your now sensitive clit.

You awake with a start and attempt to sit up, but her other hand immediately covers your mouth and presses you back onto the pillow. Your hands fly up to her wrist that held a hand over your mouth, your breathing ragged as you attempted to figure out what was going on.

"It's okay, pretty girl. Just let me take care of you.." Wanda whispers, slipping her fingers inside of you. Her body presses further against you as she moves her wrist, her fingers pumping in and out of you at a quicker pace. Your moans muffle from her hand on your mouth.

"Such a good little mouse.." She praises, trapping your moans into the palm of her hand. "You were just begging for me to sneak in, needed me to come fuck you huh?" Her tone is condescending, but you only groan in response as her lips attach to your neck.

"That's it, just like that," Wanda chuckles darkly as you squeeze her fingers tightly, her thumb moving circles on your clit. "Now I want you to be a good girl and cum on my fingers, okay?"

As she sucks the skin on your collarbone, you follow as she commands, coming on her fingers and biting down harshly on her hand. Wanda moans at the feeling and the way you fall apart for her. You knew by the sound of her belt unbuckling that it would only be the first of the night.

***

February 2019

"So you and Wanda, huh?" Natasha laughs, shaking her head. "Was the therapy that good?"

Your face turns a dark shade of red as you think back on your sessions, the dark road it led you down. You shrug and take a sip of coffee, "I suppose it was..."

There was no way you could tell Natasha everything. You wouldn't. The Cat and Mouse game you and Wanda played was special, just for the two of you. But there was no way you could hide your feelings for her anymore, or the marks she left on your body, from your best friend.

"You're happy?"

"For the first time in a long time," you answer honestly. Through the whirlwind of emotions Wanda caused you, you knew you were.

"Taking your medication again?" Natasha raises an eyebrow as you tap the side of your cup 4 times absemindetly.

"It'll never go away..." You refer to your compulsion, "But I'm learning to cope with it."

"Good! Now, when are we going to go on a double date?" She smiles widely at you.

A date... you couldn't imagine Wanda taking you on a date. Maybe you could sit at a nice restaurant and she would watch from across the street. Maybe four rows away from you as you sit in a movie theater. Would it always be this way? Always about the chase?

"Hopefully soon," is all you say, a small smile planted on your lips.

***

May 2019

The microwave beeps from across the kitchen, and you set your glass of wine down before walking over and pulling out a bag of freshly popped popcorn.

Wanda watches hidden in the shadows as you grab a second glass, filling it up and topping off your own. She raises an eyebrow at the sight. Jealousy seeps in through all the cracks of her chest. She knew for a fact that Natasha was with her girlfriend tonight, and you never had anyone else over, especially this late at night.

Two glasses of wine sit on the counter along with a bowl of popcorn as you grab your phone. Her heart races as she sees the smile spread across your lips as you stare at the small screen.

A vibrate from her pocket distracts her from you.

Wanda takes her phone out to check the text, shaking her head with a sigh. She laughs at the message with the ridiculous nickname. It was only fair, she supposed.

You - Want to watch a movie, kitty?

She looks up from the screen to see you standing by the window, waving at her. Wanda tucks her phone back in her jeans and walks towards your house, where she finds the front door unlocked.

"Do you ever get tired of watching?" You ask curiously. Wanda now sat next to you on the couch, her arm wrapped around your shoulders as you leaned into her warmth. New and uncharted territory, the most normal interaction the two of you had privately. It felt so natural. You longed for this.

"No," she answers sternly, reaching into the bowl you held and tossing some popcorn into her mouth.

In the months Wanda had revealed herself as your shadow the two of you became closer, but she still felt out of reach. You noticed during sex that she would never let you touch her, and you craved to reach out and caress her. You didn't know why, and any time you tried to ask her, she would shut it down and become distant. Wanda still watched, too, every night. Any time she wasn't in the room with you, you could feel her eyes on you. By now, you didn't mind it, but you were starting to want... more.

"What if you... didn't have to go far to watch me?" You ask casually, keeping your eyes on the movie that played in front of you.

"What do you mean?" Wanda asks, and by the tone of voice, you could tell she knew what you meant. She wanted to hear you say it.

You lean forward to set down the bowl on the coffee table and move to situate yourself to sit on her lap. Your legs straddled her thighs, and your hands rested on her shoulders. You let the nail on your finger scratch up and down the side of her neck softly.

"Baby.." You whisper to her, feeling her strong hands grip your waist. For some reason, Wanda loved when you called her that, and you saved it for times like this.

You grab her jaw in your hand, tilting it to the side so you had full access to her neck. Your lips descend upon the soft skin, tongue licking a stripe to her pulse point. Wanda shifts beneath you, fingers fidgeting against your hips as you begin to bite down and suck.

"Is that what you want then, little mouse? Did you fully think about what that means?" Her voice is laced with lust as you trail down and leave another mark. "It means you'll never be alone, you won't sleep alone. It means I can use you whenever I please..." Wandas hands travel underneath your shirt, exploring your back.

"I know.." You mumble against her skin, your hips rolling slightly down against her to find she was definitely packing.

"It means you'll belong to me. You'll be mine, completely," Wanda growls as you leave another mark, her senses failing her as you continue to grind against her.

But you stop suddenly and remove your lips from her neck, your hands on either side of her face.

"I always was, baby. I am... completely," you whisper and look into her eyes, finding that same look she gave you on New Years Eve.

Wanda kisses you passionately, slipping her tongue into your mouth the second she can. Her hands travel your body before she's pulling your shirt over your head, you do the same for her.

"I need you so fucking bad," you groan against her lips, the ache between your legs growing as you throb around nothing. Wanda nods and hums in response, lifting you up and laying your back on the couch.

She slides her hand into your panties, feeling just how badly you needed her. "All mine, huh?" Wanda chuckles as her fingers pump inside of you.

"Completely," you moan out as she begins kissing your chest. You reach around her to undo her bra, sliding it away so you can feel her breasts pressed against you.

Wanda marks your skin as hers, fingering you until you're falling apart underneath her. You watch with wide eyes as she takes her fingers out of you and puts them into her own mouth, sucking your juices off of them.

"Mmm, you taste so good, pretty girl.." Wanda gushes and then chuckles as a whimper leaves your mouth. She then leans down and kisses you in a quick and sloppy kiss, letting you taste yourself on her tongue. She parts to unzip her jeans, sliding them off of her before lining her strap up between your legs.

Wanda slides in, filling you up completely with her faux cock. The position, the closeness, this was all so new. Usually you were bound or on your stomach. This was different. It was so much more intimate. She moves her hips slowly against yours, a low moan escaping her throat.

"So good, detka.. always so fucking good," she groans and lets out a few Sokovian curses as she thrusts harder into you. Her arms rest on either side of you, holding her weight above you. You take the opportunity to wrap your arms around her.

She tenses and begins to pull back, but your legs wrap around her hips tightly to pull her closer into you. You both moan at the feeling of closeness, her being deeper than ever in you, and Wanda finds herself lost in you. She lets your hands roam the skin on her back as she fucks you.

"Baby - feels so good!" You cry out in her ear, the weight of her body pressed down onto you as she grunts against your neck. Your nails scratch down her back, causing a guttural moan to escape her lips. You throb around the plastic cock at the sound of it, wanting her as close as possible.

"I know, I know... so good... Christ," she praises you and moans in agreement, pace picking up. You can feel the muscles in her back flex as she pounds into you. The way she's moaning into your skin, you can tell she's close.

She fills you completely with every thrust, hitting that one spot that makes you see stars over and over again. Your fingers feel every inch of skin she'll let you touch, from the few moles that spread along the top below her shoulders to her back dimples on the bottom. You let your nails mark into her skin again, and Wanda feels on cloud 9. Pure bliss.

"Fuck, pretty girl I'm gonna cum," Wanda moans in your ear and picks her head up to look in your eyes, finding only pleasure written on your face. You nod at her words and hold onto her back, your legs still gripping tightly around her hips to bring her desperately closer to you.

"Me too, baby, I-I'm so close!" You gasp, feeling her lips on yours.

"Fuck, fuck! Always.. so good, fuck, I love you so much.. oh God," Wanda moans into your mouth as she thrusts into you, fucking you hard into the couch. You don't have time to register what she says before the tight coil that had built up inside you releases. A wave of pleasure crashing over you.

The two of you come at the same time, the sounds of your moans and Wanda chanting your name as she slaps her hips into yours. Wanda slows to a stop once she's sure she's taken everything she can from you.

Your chest moves rapidly as you look up at her, her jaw tense as she lets out one last groan. The muscles in her back tense up as your fingers trace small circles on her skin, and she begins to move away.

"Stay... don't move, please?" You whisper, pleading with her. Wanda sighs and gives in, too tired to move. Your heart races as you replay her words over and over again in your mind.

You bring your other hand up, stroking her brown strands of hair that splayed across the two of you and closed your eyes. Wandas arms wrap tightly underneath you as she rests her head in the crook of your neck.

She had never let you hold her like this before, touch her like this. You knew what she said was true. Her words were not just words spoken lightly. Maybe she hadn't meant to say it then, but you knew she loved you. You knew she would never let you go, even if you didn't love her back.

But you did. With all of your mind, body, and soul. Everything that you were, are, and will be.

More than you loved the special bottle of red that sat on the counter, more than the feeling of a paintbrush in your hand, more than I Love Lucy, more than counting to four.

Wandas breathing slows against your neck, her body fully relaxed as you caress her. You had never seen or felt her so at ease before.

"I love you..." You whisper as you hear soft snores fall from her lips.

It doesn't take long for you to fall asleep after, the sounds of her quiet snores and slow breathing along with the comforting weight of her body on top of yours, lull you to sleep.

Dreaming, hoping, there was a way Wanda would give in to you.

To let the game fade away.

But when you awake in the morning, you're alone on the couch. A blanket covers your naked body, hopes and dreams fading away into reality.

Wanda was gone, and the worst part was you knew she would be back, out of reach again.

You give yourself a moment on the couch, only a moment to cry, before wiping your tears and shaking the sounds of her soft snores out of your mind. The way her body melted into yours as your hearts beat insync, the way she kissed you lovingly, the words "I love you" slipping from her lips in a desperate, intimate moment. It was all a game, after all.

The wine glasses and popcorn bowl were missing from the coffee table. Curious, you wrap the blanket around your body and walk to the kitchen. The dishes were clean and sitting on the drying rack. It was then you saw on the counter a glass of water and a bottle of your medication along with a paper and pen. You slowly pick up the paper, an old receipt you had lying around, and read the note:

I'll be back later with some boxes. Don't forget to take your medicine.

The curved letters tug at your heartstrings, the next lines causing another spark to ignite in your chest.

I love you

I love you

I love you

I love you

If the game was still afoot, Wanda was winning, because you were utterly and irrevocably hers.

***

October 2019

In the sunlit room, you stood in front of a canvas, wooden brush in hand. Each stroke, movements precise and deliberate, guided by a vision taking form in your mind. You inhale the scent of oil paint as you take some more on your brush before leaning in, adding intricate detail to breathe life into your creation. Time seems to stop as you lose yourself to the creative side of your brain.

You don't hear the creak of the door opening, or feel Wandas gaze on you as she stands in the doorway, admiring you.

The large button down you wore loosely was covered in paint, a work of art in itself from all the leftover paint of paintings you had done. You hummed along to the music, playing softly behind you, tongue between your teeth and brows scrunched together as you concentrated on the small details.

Wanda can't help the crooked smile on her face as she takes in the sight of you in your element. Her heart pounding out of her chest as you brush a piece of fallen hair out of your face. She walks closer, setting her hands on your waist.

You gasp at her touch, the feeling of her nose tickles your ear as she kisses your neck.

"Baby.. you scared me," you giggle and rest a hand on top of hers, leaning back against her.

There it was again, that feeling Wanda would never get used to. The feeling that wanted to drop her to her knees right there and whisper devotions between your legs, something she did more often since you had moved in with her.

"I got tired of watching," Wanda jokes, a rumble in her chest as she laughs. You turn yourself in her arms, resting your hands on her chest.

"I don't mind you watching... but I prefer you touching," you whisper the last part sinfully, the word darkening Wandas emerald eyes. She picks you up easily, you squeal with excitement, and wrap your legs around her waist.

And there on the floor, in the room Wanda had transformed into your art studio, she whispered those devotions against your skin and between your legs.

You lay on the cloth tarp that covered the floor underneath your canvas, drawing patterns on the skin of Wandas stomach. You turn in her arm to look at her.

A jaw sculpted by God, green eyes blessed by the angels, and a smile gifted from the Devil.

The sun shines on her face, highlighting smudges of green paint on her cheek. You giggle and let your fingers travel to the colored paint stripes spread across her body, a handprint on her shoulder.

"You're my favorite work of art," you murmur to her, feeling her thumb brush the paint on your hips. She smiles, your favorite crooked smile.

"Little mouse?" Wanda asks, her voice low and calm as she stares into your eyes.

"Yes, baby?"

"Marry me.."

And it's not a question, it's a statement. A declaration. You didn't need a moment to think, because you already knew you were hers, forever.

"Yes," you say anyways, nodding your head. Wandas' smile widens, and she lifts you on top of her, kissing you the best she could without letting her smile go.

***

Christmas Day 2021

The snow crunches under Wandas' boots as she watches you walk from the kitchen to the living room, a towel on your shoulder. Your hands fumbled with something unseen, hidden from her view. Your brows furrowed in concentration, and you shook your head, mumbling something to yourself.

And then you looked up and saw her. The widest smile overcame your face. You radiated pure joy.

Wandas' heart sped up at the sight of you as she carried wood and walked towards the front door.

"Reminiscing, kitty?" You purr as you greet her at the door with a kiss and a hug, she hums against your lips.

"You don't miss it, little mouse?" Wanda chuckles and kisses your jaw, the wood dropping to the floor.

"Not when I have all this..." You sigh happily as she kisses down your neck, her hands moving under your shirt.

A cry from the other room interrupts the moment.

"Mm, those boys always know when to start, don't they?" She mumbles, "I knew when I heard twins, they would be trouble."

Wanda hears a radiant laugh escape your lips, and she gives you a crooked smile in return. You cup her face in your hands, the ring on your fourth finger on the left hand is cool against her cheek.

"I loved you then, and I love you even more now, Wanda.." you whisper, breath fanning against her face.

"I love you even more, little mouse.." she says softly, giving you one last kiss before walking into the living room, your hand in hers.

[yellowjestertfs]

Altered State: Part Six + Epilogue

Story is finally finished I can't believe it. Sorry this last part took so much longer then the others. I had a epilogue written but I sort of hated it and so decided rewrote the whole thing which took longer then I would have liked. As always Part Five, Four, Three, Two and One are already up. Thank you so much for everyone who has read what at this point is basically a book length story. I had so much fun writing it and would love to eventually write an Altered State 2.0 though I am going to try to stick to shorter projects in the meantime (Will see if I stick to that). Hope you enjoy and don't hesitate to reach out!

I like you, Leon, I have always liked you and not just in a friend way or a sexual way” Edward felt like he was going to throw up but he pushed forward. Watching Leon fight Hunter had solidified his feelings. They were too intense to let lie even a moment longer, his friend had to know how he felt even if he didn't feel the same. “but also like you in a -“

Edward didn't realize his feet were off the ground until he was already flying through the air. He let out a scream but it was too late. The metal claw wrapped tightly around his waist dragged him quickly and roughly through the air towards the towering contraption on the street like a harpoon reeling in a big fish. 

Edward’s whole body shook as the metal chain fully retracted the claw into the mech’s arm reattaching firmly. His head hurt and he suspected he might have a concussion. Edward struggled but his 5.4 strength was pathetic compared to the pressurized machinery holding him. 

Edward turned to face the pilot. A large colored plastic dome that looked as if it had been salvaged from a playground, sat on top of the mech distorting the appearance of the person inside. The floating name tag above their head however was visible and made Edward’s breath catch. “Alvis, Level 20 Technocrat”

Edward internally groaned. It was clear something had happened to Alvis besides him gaining 20 levels and a mech. He looked physically different. Through the semi-transparent plastic Alvis looked like a baby or a sickly child. His head was now mostly bald and extremely oversized, especially for his tiny body. His eyes were bright with a vast intelligence but the rest of his face had somehow gotten uglier.

“Alvis, what are you doing?” Edward asked, kicking his feet as he fruitlessly tried to escape.

Alvis ignored him. Instead he looked over Edward with a hungry gaze then in a voice amplified by a mic hidden somewhere in the mech said “wow you really are a pretty one. I’m starting to understand why that lout is so obsessed with you. It’s too bad your both assholes.”

“Let’s talk about this Alvis! I think there has been a misunderstanding.” The grip on Edward grew tighter making his words come out strained.

“Misunderstanding” Alvis’s nasal voice shouted “You and Leon are the worst most selfish roommates ever. You ignore me, you touch my things without asking and you fucked in my bed!” The last accusation came out as a screeched and Edward paled. He had no idea how Alvis knew that but it would make reasoning with him a lot more difficult. 

“I’m sorry about that. Put me down and we can talk. You don’t have to do this” Edwards said trying his best to work his charm though it was hard dangling in the grip of a giant robot talking through a barely transparent colored plastic spear.

Still, diplomacy seemed the only way. Edward tried to focus on his sage sense but he didn't understand what he was feeling. Alvis’s true desire had something to do with a basement, not particularly helpful at the moment. The countdown for the quest was down to a minute and thirty seconds. Edward had regained just enough energy points to use an emotion bomb on Hunter but the act had drained him of his reserves. A single point had regenerated since then and he was due to regenerate another soon, though that was still too little to use any of his techniques. He had no doubt Leon would try to play white knight and save the damsel from King Kong but he would only get himself hurt. Besides having a giant robot, Alvis was eight levels ahead of both of them with a whole host of abilities or techniques to be sure. 

Edward wasn’t particularly surprised by the level gap. Video games were one of the only things Leon and Alvis had in common. He knew Alvis was a power gamer, someone who focused on making his character as strong as possible while bypassing other things like the story. Edward always thought that approach took the fun out of the game. Edward also knew Alvis was brutal with the power he had, quick to kill an NPC or even his own allies if it amused him or served his ends.

“I don’t have to do this?” Alvis asked in a mocking tone. “Don’t you understand, don’t you ever think with more than your dick. They sent you here to stop me because they know what I am going to do. It’s awake now and there is no putting it back to sleep. If they want to give us power then they need to live with the consequences.” His words became increasingly forceful and a bit deranged.

“Alvis I don’t understand what you are saying, who are they, what is it? Can you give me some proper nouns here?” Edward could see his charisma start to take hold, making Alvis more talkative. Alvis had never been the easiest person to get along with but Edward suspected his new class might have driven him a touch insane. He supposed such a sudden increase in intelligence might do that. 

Alvis chose to ignore all of Edward's questions and continues with his madman’s rant. “I overloaded it once and so much had already changed under the surface. But of course you can’t see. Its getting smarter more complex, leaning from those who join. If that was just one frat house imagine a whole block, imagine the whole campus, the whole city. You and Leon are blinded by the glamor, I won’t let myself be, I can’t. The game speaks to me, its voice is getting louder. It wants to make our desires manifest but they don’t want it to. They are going to kill us, kill it kill our god. We can’t let them, we need to help it, help it, help me, I’m going to kill you.”

Edward blanched. It was clear something was seriously wrong with Alvis. His words were choppy and halting and at times sounded as if someone else was speaking. Still there were nuggets of truth hidden in his rantings things Edward could learn about how the game worked or at least how Alvis thought it worked. The “critical mass” notification from earlier must have been from when Alvis had played the disk for the frat and added them to the game. Adding that many players had updated the game to version 1.2. It seemed Alvis wished to add more players to update the game again, though Edward didn’t know why. Could that be the purpose of the device? Did Alvis truly think the game was alive?

He knew if he had time he could calm Alvis down and get a proper answer out of him, but he didn't get the chance.

From above there was a sound like an airplane taking off. Leon, in all his naked glory flung himself from the hole in the second floor. He had grown, a lot, he looked like a superhero, flying forward fist extended in a high ark, surging over the front yard and landing onto the street just in front of the robot. The concrete cracked under his bare feet and a shockwave blasted out from where he landed which rocked the mech but didn’t topple it, nor did the grip on Edward loosen.

Leon looked pissed, an expression made scary by his now hypermasculine square face adorned with a mustache and stubble. He looked like a Norse giant or an especially large and pissed-off gay porn star.

A crack had appeared in the plastic bubble over Alvis. Through it Edward could more clearly see  the Technocrat’s face which seemed surprised by Leon’s demonstration of force and anger, but not concerned. Leon rushed forward, in his giant form he was almost two-thirds as tall as the massive machine though still substantially less wide. Edward knew Leon would try to pry him free of the machine, and so did Alvis. The mech's other hand pivoted slowly on rusty loud gears, then suddenly sprung forward as if the mechanism had become butter, likely due to one of Alvis’s techniques. The arm slammed into Leon mid-charge and flung him back into a car parked on the street, denting the vehicle and causing its alarm to go off. The few college kids who had gathered on the street filming the fight on their phones cheered at the blow. 

“Leon stop” Edward yelled. He knew he could talk both of them down if they stopped for a second, but the two were too busy with their masculine antics to listen to him. Leon picked himself up from the ground. If not for his Animal Endurance and Armored Skin, he would likely be dead. As it was Edward could see Leon now had a limp. He charged once again, his giant body causing the ground to shake under his pounding feet. 

Alvis activated another technique and every piece of technology within a large radius around him exploded. Cars, street lamps, fire hydrants, and even the phone in Edward's pocket all deconstructed themselves into component parts and flew toward Alvis like he was a magnet. A large car door flew into Leon, throwing him off his feet and the metal components and electronics of Edward’s phone dug painfully into him as they tried to reach Alvis by tearing a hole in his leg. 

Leon was stubborn. He got back to his feet, dodged a wildly whipping electrical line then charged at Alvis, using a flying telephone pole as a javelin. The wooden pole smashed into the center of the robot toppling it onto one leg. Alvis furiously worked the controls, preventing the machine from falling, but in the process the claw around Edward’s waist loosened enough for him to slip out. He fell to the concrete rolling painfully.

Leon saw this and tried to run to Edward but was kicked away hard by the mech’s foot, Alvis’s attention fully focused on Leon thanks to his Punchable Face perk. Edward ran away from the mech, his Effortless Grace allowed him to do a decent job dodging the flying technological debris but he still accumulated a series of cuts in the process. He would have given anything for a few of Leon’s perks at that moment. 

“You destroyed my car!” Leon yelled accusingly, ripping up a mailbox from the ground and hurling it at Alvis. A laser shot from the mech’s other hand and sliced it in half. 

“You used my game system without asking” Alvis shot back voice slightly distorted by the speaker. 

“Those are not equivalent things!” Leon yelled. The two could have been siblings fighting on a road trip if they were not both hulking behemoths capable of taking down a house. “And I smashed your stupid machine,” Leon shouted up at Alvis, trying to get a reaction. 

“Which one?” Alvis asked cooly. Edward’s heart sank. He should have known someone as paranoid as Alvis would have multiple contraptions set up. He saw Leon’s eyes go wide as well. Edward suddenly remembered what he had felt with his sage skill. In the basement, the machine had to be down there.

All it took was one look at Leon and his friend knew. Edward made a break back towards the frat house. The surges of debris had slowed allowing him to reach the house in a matter of seconds. At the front door Leon had kicked in, Edward risked a look back and saw Alvis had attempted to pilot his mech to go after him but was being physically held back by Leon pulling on a leg with Herculean strength. On instinct Edward cast out with his captive serpent technique, burning the two energy points that had regenerated on Alvis before rushing into the house. 

Edward sprinted to the door he had seen with his sage perk and was grateful to find it unlocked. It was clear the basement was used normally for storage. Boxes, dusty shelves and other junk filled the floor expect for cleared out area where the contraption sat. It looked like the one from upstairs only slightly smaller. Satellite dishes hung from the side and in the middle was yet another copy of the “Altered State” game disk. Edward had no idea how Alvis had gotten multiple. 

There were only twenty seconds left on the quest. The machine was working up to something big, a loud whirring noise came from the center part of the machine and the LED lights along the edges began to blink faster and faster. Edward grabbed a rusty length of metal from the ground, maybe once used in some scaffolding or as a fire poker. Outside he could hear the clash of titans, metal slamming into reinforced skin. He hoped Leon was alright.

It was amazing to him how much he and Leon’s lives had changed because of this game. In the course of a day, Edward had gone from an insecure ugly nobody drifting passively through life to someone with the power and autonomy to take what he wanted. Leon was always a superhero trapped in the body of a fat kid. Sure he could be quick to judge and a little immature but he ultimately wanted to do so much good but rarely could. The game had allowed him the opportunity to become what was always on the inside. And the game had brought them together. It was so silly to Edward that he had spent all that time dreaming about having someone special in his life when he already had it all along. He wanted Leon and only Leon. 

He thought again about the quest reward offered for spoiling Alvis’s plans. A love potion. He imagined giving it to Leon, imagined his friend looking back at him with the same amount of love he had for him. He lifted the length of metal ready to smash the machine, but hesitated. 

It wasn’t the ethics of a love potion that stayed his hand. No, the game wouldn’t have given him the Snake Charmer class if Edward was morally opposed to bending wills. Instead, it was what Alvis had said.

If he understood correctly, which was far from a sure thing, this machine was intended to bring more people into the game. Alvis seemed to think it would only affect the surrounding city and with one machine smashed it might be even less effective. Yet even so Edward wondered if he could really deprive others of the opportunity he had gotten. Sure there were those out there like Hunter and the guys in the frat who would abuse the power but Edward firmly believed there was more like Trent and Tag or him and Leon who wouldn’t. Edward knew it was stupid to trust Alvis. He was a weasel and without a doubt had his own motivations that were less than pure, and yet ultimately they agreed on the outcome that had to occur.

Plus there was the fact that Alvis seemed to think the game was alive. Edward was pretty sure that belief was due to his roommate having gone fully insane, and yet with all he had seen, he struggled to fully reject the idea. If so would Edward stopping the machine kill it, or doom it to a life of simple servitude? Was Edward willing to do all that to be with Leon?

In the one second before the countdown hit zero Edward was left with the agonizing decision so many have faced before. His desire for good and his desire for love waged war. In the end he made his decision with a deep breath and a step back as he watched the countdown hit zero and accepted his fate to live life without love. 

The machine let out of loud nails on a chalkboard screech, shook violently then sent a beam of light into the ceiling. For a few seconds, there was nothing then Edward blinked finding his vision suddenly filled with a rapid series of notifications and to his surprise tears. The two remaining quests marked themselves as failed though luckily he didn't become a Wretch for it.

Instantly Edward’s mind went to Leon. He felt a strange cocktail of mourning, guilt, and acceptance which made his stomach hurt. Mourning for the potential life of love he could have had with his friend, guilt for what he had just unleashed, and acceptance knowing that whatever came next he had to accept. He needed to let this dream, this delusion of anything more with Leon die.

He pocketed the copied Altered State disk then left the basement resigned to his fate, feeling uglier then he ever had before.

-

Leon, for about the hundredth time that day, had no idea what was going on. As the countdown on the quest reached zero and a grating mechanical noise emerged from the house behind him Alvis let out a sinister laugh, face twisting into an evil satisfied grin. “Looks like your boyfriend chose chaos over you,” the technocrat said. Then he pulled a lever on his mechanism and the cockpit shot out like a rocket, blasting Alvis and the mechanical core of the mech high and far into the air before a parachute deployed and Leon’s evil roommate drifted slowly to the ground laughing all the way.

Leon didn’t have time to watch Alvis’s descent. A wave of notifications blinded him coming at first in rapid succession before coming slower like the last few stubborn popcorn kernels in the microwave. Around him, he heard the other students on the street yell in alarm and confusion. 

“The player count for this version of Altered State has reached critical mass. The system has upgraded itself from version 1.2 to version 1.3.”

“The player count for this version of Altered State has reached critical mass. The system has upgraded itself from version 1.3 to version 1.4.”

“The player count for this version of Altered State has reached critical mass. The system has upgraded itself from version 1.4 to version 1.5.”

“The player count for this version of Altered State has reached critical mass. The system has upgraded itself from version 1.5 to version 1.6.”

“The player count for this version of Altered State has reached critical mass. The system has upgraded itself from version 1.6 to version 1.7.”

“The player count for this version of Altered State has reached critical mass. The system has upgraded itself from version 1.7 to version 1.8.”

“The player count for this version of Altered State has reached critical mass. The system has upgraded itself from version 1.8 to version 1.9.”

“The player count for this version of Altered State has reached critical mass. The system has upgraded itself from version 1.9 to version 2.0”

When he focused on any of the notifications two smaller ones popped up.

“A full list of changes is available to all players with above 100 in intelligence or with a technology-based class. Thank you for playing Altered State.” 

“Altered state is a product of the HunkTech corporation. Any unauthorized tampering with any version of this product will result in an immediate correctional effort.”

Leon felt something shift and then pop within his brain as if he had rapidly descended into the deep ocean. The appearance of the UI superimposed onto his vision by the game changed becoming more sleek and modern. Before it had looked like a 90’s RPG with blocky text and bold bright colors. Now however all the lines were clean and simple, adjusting themselves into a more unobtrusive and intuitive places in his vision. New tabs also appeared on his UI, there was one for stats, another for his quests, and a third for his inventory, which was currently empty. Another tab had a list of contacts. Edward, Ruth, and some of his more friendly acquaintances were on there along with most of his professors, though his family and friends from home were missing for some reason. Looking closely he saw he had the ability to start chats with any of them or invite them to a party. There was also a tab for achievements, one which had a map on it, and the last tab which was an auto-populating journal that listed with detailed information all the classes, perks, items, abilities, and game related things he had encountered. Leon knew he could, and would spend hours reacquainting himself with the new features and the changes to old ones but first, he needed to find Edward. 

The bulk of Alvis’s robot still lay on the street, dented from the multiple places Leon had hit it with thrown debris or his own fists. The road and surrounding front yards were marred from the battle, big chunks of electoral and water lines having ripped themselves up from the ground and flooding the street with dangerously electrified water. Leon heard some loud voices coming from the other side of the street and slowly made his way over. 

As he navigated the debris he felt himself slowly shrink back down to his usual size, his Size Up ability having finally run its course. Leon felt suddenly weak without his boosted strength and inhuman muscle size, though he knew he was still clinically speaking totally jacked.

Leon felt his breath catch as he saw the source of the commotion around. The dozen or so onlookers who had been filming the battle now stood on the street all talking over each other with panic or disbelief. A few stared blankly into space with the familiar glazed look of reading a notification or checking out their stats. 

Sure enough, all the onlookers now had name tags floating above their heads which listed their name, their classes, and their level, which for all of them was level one. A few houses down a group of sorority girls walked outside looking for answers. All of them too had classes now listed above their heads, some made sense like the Cheerleader, Bookworm, or Pop Star class; while others seemed more bizarre like a short blond girl with the level one Radiant Knight class or another with the Park Pigeon Lady class. 

More people came out of their homes or got out of their cars, nearly all of whom had classes now listed above their heads. Leon even saw a dog on a leash that now had the class Best Boy above its head and a squirrel that ran by with the class Nutcracker.

“Leon” he heard a familiar voice yell. Leon turned to see Edward making his way towards him. Leon felt like scooping his friend up in a hug and never letting him go but Edward seemed strangely sheepish and hesitant so he kept his distance. 

“All this, was it really Alvis’s plan?” Leon asked gesturing to the confused level one people around them. 

“Part of it at least I think.” Edward said surveying the chaos with an odd detached look on his face “Did you get him?”

Leon shook his head “He got away.” 

“That's alright. I got him with my captive serpent technique.”

“What does that do again?” Leon asked. 

“Prevents him from being able to cum.” Edward said handsome smile slipping onto his face for a moment.

“Oh, he’s not going to like that.” 

A dark sad look came back over Edward’s face and they stood there in awkward silence, the first Leon could remember since they had first met.  “So, what now?” Leon asked trying to bring a lightheartedness back.

It didn't work on Edward. “I guess we just go home,” he hesitated and looked like he was going to cry for some reason “or you could go out to a party and pick up a girl if you wanted. I’d understand.”

“A girl?” Leon asked laughing “What are you talking about?”

“I saw a level one cheerleader. She was really pretty. I’m sure you could pick her up now with your body and stuff.” Edward said, spitting the words out like they were burning his mouth on the way out. 

“Edward,” Leon said trying to interrupt his friend. 

Edward kept going. “I’m sorry about our hookup before. It was fun and all but I know you probably want something more serious and -.” 

“Edward” Leon said again louder stepping forward.

Edward continued stubbornly adverting his gaze away from Leon “And about what I was saying before, I don’t know what I was thinking. I know it was just physical between us and that I kind of forced you into it with my perks and that you wouldn’t want anything more with-“

“Oh, will you shut up already,” Leon said placing one large hand over Edward's mouth, feeling the erotic thrill of the touch. Edward tried to say something but his words were muffled by Leon’s fingers. He looked up at Leon with eyes that looked so sad and hopeful and tired all at the same time, eyes that made Leon’s heart melt. 

“I like you, Edward. I like like you. Yeah, I want things to be like they were before. I want to play video games together and hang out every day and tell you all my stupid jokes. But I also want to do other stuff, like snuggle in bed with you, and kiss you and I really want to have sex with you like 100 times a day.” Edward gave a weak laugh from under Leon’s hand, still obviously unconvinced. Leon’s no-fear perk made him bold and he continued to dump the thoughts that had been brewing in his mind all day. “Edward if something happened to you I don’t know what I would do. I care about you a lot, you're like my favorite person in the whole world. And I don’t really know what that all means, I still don’t think I’m gay but I want to have sex with you and to be your best friend and I guess that's basically like being a boyfriend. He said the last part as a question, suddenly feeling incredibly vulnerable and fragile, a thing he hadn’t thought he could ever feel with his physical size and strength.

He lifted his hand away from Edward’s mouth to reveal a brilliant charming smile that dimpled Edward’s face adorably. “Do you really mean it?” He asked like a boy opening presents for Christmas.

“Of course I do,” Leon said returning his own grin. Edward wrapped his arms tight around Leon’s naked back, hands barely able to meet with how wide his shoulders were. “So is that a yes to the whole boyfriend thing?” 

“Of course it is you dork,” Edward said. He laughed melodically and Leon lifted him off the ground spinning him in the air. The two kissed, slow and passionate and oh so right. Leon felt like he had beaten the game like this was what all the questing fighting and discovery had been for. Some of the people outside turned to stare at the two gorgeous men making out, though most were too preoccupied with their new classes and the quests they had just been given to notice.

Leon knew things were about to change. That the life he knew, the world he understood were now things of the past. Yet in that moment none of that seemed to matter. Leon couldn’t see the chaos around him, nor the displays superimposed onto his vision. All Leon could see in that moment was his lover, his best friend, his roommate, and now his boyfriend. He knew that so long as they were together everything would be alright.

-

Epilogue

“I’m not drunk” Edward slurred in a way that made it very clear he was completely sloshed. He slumped over into Leon’s lap eyes glazed over not from reading notifications but from the copious tequila shots and evidently very dirty Shirley he had just consumed. 

“Sure your not,” Leon said patting his boyfriend’s head efficiently. “I’m just going to chat Tag and ask him to make you one of those detoxing drinks. 

“Uhhh” Edward groaned into Leon’s lap. “Those taste like dog food. I should not have -” he hiccuped loudly “tried to keep up with you.” 

At least twenty shot glasses sat empty in front of Leon and he didn't even feel a slight buzz. Tag had invited him to the bar convinced his latest creation would be strong enough to get Leon drunk and while the drink, a mix of every alcohol imaginable, was strong enough to fry a liver from smell alone it was no match for the combination of his Metabolizer perk and his level seventeen Relentless Constitution perk which made him resistant to things like temperature, pressure, sickness, and poison. 

Leon was secretly a little miffed that he would be relegated to being the designated driver for the rest of his college years though the trade off’s offered by his class were more then worth it. Besides at the moment Edward was drunk enough for the both of them. 

Leon placed a dinner plate-sized hand on Edward's back and started to rub up and down causing his boyfriend to moan appreciatively. Leon felt an overwhelming urge to protect Edward which he knew was due in part to his genuine feelings towards his boyfriend and also the result of Edward’s level 17 perk, Protect Me, which compelled the men around him to protect him in times of distress. 

Leon navigated the tabs of his UI, a thing that had become second nature in the month since they had started their Altered State Journey, and opened up a private chat with Tag. “Could we get an order of your detox drink in the back? Edward's real housewife sloppy drunk.”

A moment passed then Tag sent a personalized emoji doing a thumbs up, and sent a message saying he would be there as soon as he made one for Trent as well.

A level eighteen weatherman with the bland generic handsomeness of a TV newscaster glanced their way as he walked by, bringing a pocket of cold air with him causing Leon’s nipples to perk up. Because they were going out Leon had managed to squeeze himself into a pair of XXL jeans though he couldn’t bring himself to put on a shirt. With his Naked confidence perk no one minded his lack of dress, least of all his boyfriend. 

As if alerted to the state of Leon’s nipples by a silent bell Edward sat up and began to massage Leon’s pecs, which had grown to the size of softballs to match his 62 strength, and squeeze it like a stress ball. His grip had some actual strength behind it thanks to the lean muscle he had managed to pack on from a few gym sessions aided by Leon’s Personal Trainer perk. While Leon barely felt the pressure of Edward’s grip through his naturally armored skin he did feel the effects of Edward’s Euphoric Caress. After two weeks with lots of physical contacts, the perk no longer overwhelmed him, though it still made him shift in his seat and his dick stiffen to attention. 

“That guy was totally checking you out.” Edward slurred in his drunken state, grabbing a fist full of Leon’s chest hair and tugging on it like an inquisitive child. 

Leon rolled his eyes. “Are you kidding he was totally checking you out.”

“I think he was checking us both out, maybe he could be our special unicorn,” Edward said giggling to himself before hiccuping loudly again and laying his head back into Leon’s lap. 

Early on the two had agreed that they were both secure enough in their bond to allow the other to have some fun on their own. Edward who was not lacking for willing and eager sexual partners had taken advantage of their arrangement a few times, though Leon had yet to. His feelings regarding his sexuality were still too confusing and there was still too much he wanted to explore with Edward for him to feel the need, though he didn't begrudge his boyfriends escapades. Edward had gotten it into his head that they should bring a third into their sex lives to spice things up and was now on a full blown hunt for a “Special Unicorn”.

From the other side of the bar, two glowing orbs of light trailing glittering sparks behind them flew towards their table. They spun in place before growing brighter and larger resolving into the shape of Tag standing and Trent hovering, as he now always did, in front of them. 

Though Leon hadn’t met either before they had been assigned classes on that fateful night he knew from Edward that Tag looked relatively the same as he had a week ago. Tall and fit with dark skin and tattoos, he wore a tight black shirt and baggy jeans that hugged his ass and crotch. Leon still wasn’t gay but being with Edward had given him an appreciation for good-looking men like Tag.

So far as Leon knew there were only two effects from the game that had changed Tag’s appearance so far. The first were the few workouts he had led Tag through which thanks to his level 13 Personal Trainer perk were much more effective at building strength. The second came from a special juice shot that Tag now drank daily which boosted his charisma a few points, making his face more handsome and his dick slightly larger.

Above his head, Tag’s tag displayed his name and his class, a Mixologist, though it didn’t show a level. This they had discovered over the course of the month since that fateful day was due to the fact that Tag’s class was considered a profession. Profession classes were often based off artisan occupations or other skilled jobs and gave related bonuses. Profession classes were less common but Leon had seen many in the month since Alvis’s machine had gone off like the Seamstress, Carpenter, Perfumer, or the Barber class which Alexi had received, making his haircuts even better and giving small stat bonuses to anyone who received his services. Unlike embodied classes which gave abilities or Conduit classes which gave access to Energy Points and techniques, profession classes didn’t level up. That meant they didn't gain perks or attribute points naturally. Instead, they had access to skills. 

Tag had reported that there were hundreds if not thousands of skills available. Things like walking, breathing, eating, or sleeping all counted as skills and were available to be leveled up by those with profession classes. Increasing a skill made a person better at that thing and also gave passive or active bonuses at each level depending on the skill. 

Not all skills were created equal, however. Profession classes gave huge bonuses to relevant skills. In the weeks since he had gotten his class Tag had managed to level up his Mixology skill to level fourteen while his sex skill, a thing Tag assured him he was doing a lot of, had only leveled up once. 

Tag theorized there were ways of boosting skill progression or even having more than one profession class at a time though he hadn’t yet figured out how to do either.

“I told you those Dirty Shirley’s were too strong,” Trent said taking in Edward's slumped drunken state. Though he was significantly shorter than Tag he hovered a few feet in the air on a pair of iridescent fairy wings making Tag have to look up to meet his disapproving gaze. 

Tag gave Leon a sheepish glance then walked over to Edward whose eyes were half closed and were muttering something to himself. “Yeah still working on that recipe. Just give me a second and I’ll fix him up.” 

Tag reached his hand into a small bag on his hip much further than should have been possible then removed his hand holding a large glass. He reached back in and procured a mug of hot coffee liquid, an egg, and half a lemon. Trent helpfully freed up Tag’s hands by making each ingredient float in the air with a wave of his hand as Tag pulled them out.

Leon knew Trent had specifically picked the level fifteen technique out of the three offered by his Pixie class that allowed him to warp the space of containers in order to make something for Tag to carry his mixology supplies around in. At the moment he could only work his technique on small bags but Trent had told him and Edward that once he had enough energy points he could do the same to a whole room or even a building, warping the space to make them bigger on the inside then the outside. 

Tag added each of the ingredients to the glass, stirred it exactly three times in each direction then offered it up to Edward. Leon sat Edward up and took the glass placing it to his lips, The unappetizing brown slightly lumpy looked like it tasted like dogfood but Leon knew the effectiveness of Tag’s brews and so tipped the liquid back between his boyfriends pillowy lips. Edward gagged before gulping the concoction down with a sour look on his face. 

Instantly color returned to his face and he sat up on his own, eyes focusing with their usual intelligence. “Have you really not found a way to improve the taste?” Edward asked wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and scowling at Tag. 

“Next on my to-do list,” Tag said sitting down on a stool next to Edward and giving him a cheeky grin. 

“As if. You just like to watch us suffer.” Edward said playfully shoving Tag.

Trent stayed hovering in the air on his wings but descended a few feet down and floated closer to the table so he was next to Leon. “I think the raw egg isn’t even necessary. He just add it to be a dick.”

“How dare.” The tag said in mock outrage. Leon watched his friend's banter with a smile. Once he might have joined in with his own playful jabs but ever since he reached level 20 a few days ago and earned the perk Stalwart Presence he had found himself content to be a more passive observer in group conversations. A pillar of good-natured strength rather than a participant. 

He felt strange about how that perk along with his level 8 No Fear perk and in some ways his Tip Top Testosterone perk were changing his personality. Sure he might be becoming a better person but it felt wrong to have that forced upon him rather than undergo that development himself. 

Edward too had received perks that changed his personality. His level 20 perk, Shed Your Skin, had made him more sociable, friendly, and flirtatious. The shy reserved Edward he had once known was now a thing of the past. In a way their dynamic had completely shifted and yet underneath it all they were still fundamentally the same people, at least Leon hoped. 

“It's been a few days since we have seen you, what have you two been up to other than fucking like bunnies?” Trent asked with an impish grin. He too had received a personality-adjusting perk at level 20, making him more playful and mischievous, better in line with his Pixie class. His appearance had had also changed as he leveled. Besides for the obvious wings he now had his face had gained a puckish handsomeness from the charisma he received at each level plus a perk that caused his ears to now end in points. 

Like how level five caused a rapid and drastic change to one’s body it seemed to be a universal thing as well that level 20 caused a change to one's personality. It was one of the reasons that a sizable amount of people given classes were hesitant to advance them. Level 20 it seemed was also a sort of soft level cap. Afterwards the game no longer provided the same regular relatively simple quests that were so useful in leveling up fast early. Instead, one was forced to level up relying on the XP gained from doing tasks related to their class or from XP rewards granted from rarer situational quests like event quests or combat quests. Edward and Leon hadn't yet gotten another of those and in the week or so since they reached level twenty and though both had earned enough XP to reach level 21 it had taken a few days of determined effort, a much slower process compared to their earlier rapid assent in levels. 

For Leon that meant he had to spend a lot of time in the gym or playing sports to earn Juggernaut XP, while Edward earned XP by talking to people, specifically men. With some experimentation, Leon had also discovered that intense sex provided him with XP while Edward received XP through foreplay. They did plenty of both, for their development of course. 

“I’d say this one is more a jackrabbit than a bunny,” Edward said gesturing to Leon with an equally devious grin. “It’s been weird trying to settle back into my old routines though.” Edward continued somewhat more seriously “I mean it’s just kind of hard to focus on my lessons when I know half my classmates can shoot lasers out of their eyes.”

All at the table nodded at that. Alvis’s device had caused the activation code for Altered State to be blasted onto every TV, phone, and device with a connection to the internet on campus and the surrounding areas. The code had remained long enough and had happened at a busy enough period to ensure that most of the the student body and faculty who lived in the area had joined the game and given classes. This had also overloaded the system and forced the game to update itself eight times to version 2.0. 

In the ensuing chaos the university had shut down. It became the fascination of international news as what first was first being reported as mass hysteria quickly became a story about the supernatural powers the local residents now possessed and the video game they claimed to be in.

The school had made the bold choice after only two week of closure to resume its usual functions, now with a dedicated department to honing and utilizing these new abilities and with lots of research grants given to those with professional classes. 

Tag had been given a generous stipend to pursue his mixology by the school. He often told the others how strange it felt to buy alcohol on the school's dime, though that didn’t stop him from doing so copiously and with a great generosity for sharing the results of his experiments.

Those however like Leon and Edward whose classes were not particularly beneficial to anyone but themselves were still expected to attend their usual course schedule. There were of course many who ignored this edict, too enwrapped by their new reality or afraid of it to attend class. However, there were also surprising number of people who were content to live life as they had before, mostly ignoring the video game display now permanently superimposed onto their vision and making little use of the perks and abilities they did earn.

Leon and Edward were somewhere in the middle. While they attended most of their University classes their focus had definitely shifted to experimenting and advancing their Altered State classes and enjoying the fruits of their efforts. Their educations just no longer seemed quite as important, especially when they received guaranteed increases to their intelligence each level. 

“I know what you mean,” Trent said agreeing with Edward's comments about classes. “My Early American Literature class has become impossible to focus in.”

“Why’s that?” Edward asked, “Did the professor get the pilgrim class?”

“No worse, he’s a DILF.” The table was silent for a moment and Trent rushed to clarify “that's his class I mean, and he’s high-level too.”

“That's a class?” Edward exclaimed surprised. “What type of perks does it give? Is it charisma or strength based?” He asked, a bit too excited for his curiosity to be purely academic.  

“Maybe both” Trent guessed. “He’s gotten all muscly and handsome over the past few weeks as he’s leveled up. I’m not sure about perks but his hair turned this really sexy salt and pepper at level eleven I think.”

“Oh my god, what time is your lecture?” Edward said all pretenses of casual curiosity gone as he turned to Leon with object joy on his face. “Maybe he can be our third! I could seduce him, you know I could.” 

“Maybe,” Leon said though the idea did intrigued him.

“What are you boys talking about?” A voice said from behind. Leon turned to see Ruth and a long-faced girl he recognized as Olivia, one of the Dagahir player who had fought Hunter with. She had been granted the Shieldmaiden class while Ruth had gained the Girl With a Giant Sword class, which as the name suggested had given her the ability to summon and wield a sword that was nearly the size she was. The sword, which was thick and silver with red ornamentation stood point into the floor next to her. Some gave it curious looks as they passed but most ignored it, as it was no longer an uncommon sight to see individuals carrying weapons granted by their class especially not to the mostly classed student patrons of the bar. 

Leon scooted his stool a bit more towards Trent to make room for the newcomers at the table. The others knew Leon’s friends they would be coming and shifted as well to make room for the two women. Trent flew over the table to hover by Tag so that Ruth could lean her sword on the wall he have been hovering by.

Since that fateful day Leon had attended a number of Dagohir meetings, ones made significantly more interesting now that a majority of the club had been granted classes most of which happened to lend themselves to medieval combat in some way.

“Trent was just telling us about this DILF class,” Leon said trying to involve the newcomers into the conversation. 

“A DILF class?” Ruth asked, “What department is that in?”

 “English” Trent said and Ruth’s eyebrows shot up. 

“That's the professor's class, in the game.” Leon clarified.

“Ahh,” Ruth said looking suddenly thoughtful. As soon as the two newcomers had arrived Tag had busied himself making them drinks from the supplies in his physics-defying bag. He hadn’t bothered to ask what either wanted, one of the perks of his class was that he usually knew on instinct.  “Don’t you think it's weird how gendered the classes are?” Ruth asked. 

“What do you mean?” Tag asked as he handed her and Olivia two white drinks that looked like Pina Colada complete with little paper umbrellas. 

“I mean just look.” She said gesturing at her and Olivia’s Shieldmaiden and Girl With A Giant Sword classes floating above their head then at a table in the corner of three goth girls labeled the classes Vampire Huntress, Vampire Seductress, and Vampire Priestess. “Don’t you think it’s strange that classes would specify gender in them? Plus from what I have seen the classes assigned to women tend to lean more towards fighting while all the guys classes sound like they could be gay porn categories.”

Trent snorted at that but Tag looked thoughtful. Edward shot Leon and meaningful glance and Leon nodded. Edward had informed him of what Alvis had said and while they originally chalked it up to the rantings of a madman they had started to reconsider the notion that the game might be alive in some form. There were just too many coincidences and and incidental happenings for someone not to be in control of the game, and from what Alvis had said it was unlikely to still be Hunktech. 

Ever since Alvis had escaped that night neither had heard or seen from him at all, and while his stuff still remained in their apartment neither had high hopes of him paying his share of next month's rent. Edward was convinced that Alvis had skipped town but Leon wasn’t so sure. Edward still maintained his Captive Serpent technique on Alvis mean the man hadn’t climaxed in at least a month. He doubted his incel roommate was to happy about that and suspected he would try to force Edward to release him sooner or later. To be safe Leon had gotten the local locksmith who had received the Locksmith profession to install new locks now imbued with extra strength.

“Also,” Ruth said filling the empty science her questions had left “have you guys seen a single hetero couple.” That stumped the table as all wracked their brains trying to think of if they had seen any. Leon had heard of a number of other individuals with sexuality-bending class features like Edward had though all seemed orientated towards same-sex relations.

“So you think the game has a gay agenda?” Trent asked smirking. Ruth only shrugged, face stoic. She had become a rather serious person, and Leon was realizing she might not actually be a great friendship match for the ever-playful Trent.

“To the gay agenda,” Edward said raising his Dirty Shirley in a toast breaking the tension that had begun to bubble. He took a sip of the Dirty Shirley Tag had made for him earlier and his eyes instantly took on an intoxicated look. Leon suspected he might need another of Tag’s detox drinks before long. 

Leon stood up from the table. While the shots he took earlier might not have gotten him drunk it did give him the need to pee like a fountain. 

“Kiss before you go, babe?” Edward asked sweetly. Leon shook his head ruefully. He knew firsthand the power a kiss from Edward had gained after the Snake Charmer had reached level 19. A perk called Venomous Kiss made it so that Edward’s saliva now contained a non-lethal toxin that caused any man who injected it to want Edward desperately and irresistibly. The toxin naturally wore off after half an hour or if the antidote, located in Edward’s sperm, was consumed. Leon had been under the effects enough the past few weeks to know that while extremely fun it was also nearly impossible to control himself while under the effect and that a kiss now would likely result in them having sex in the middle of the bar, scandalizing their new friends.

“Maybe later babe.” He said excusing himself from the table and heading towards the bathrooms in the back. He maneuvered between a level eleven Combat Medic and a level sixteen Exorcist with glowing red eyes, apologizing profusely as he brushed up against them, mindful of the space his 250 pounds 6’5” body took up and also feeling slightly scared of what the Exorcist who’s eyes glowed a malicious red might do if pissed off.

A table of low level guys gawked at him as he passed. One with the class of Nudist who was predictably nude whistled at him as he passed. “Flex for us” he practically begged. Leon gave a rueful smile, a slight bicep flex then went into the men's room. His level 18 perk, Mr. Olympia made his muscles extremely appealing to onlookers, and requests for such displays were not uncommon, though Leon still felt embarrassed being so openly objectified. 

Inside the bathroom, Leon approached the unoccupied of the two urinals. He fished out his dick from his pants which had grown even bigger with added levels thanks to his Grower and Shower perk, a jaw filling nine inches. In his peripheral vision, he could just make out the tag of the man peeing next to him. A level fourteen Big Dicked Wonder. Though it violated all urnal  codes Leon couldn’t help but cast his gaze down to the man's penis. 

The class name was no lie. The man’s dick looked like a prosthetic. It made Leon’s thick dick look like a shrimp. He felt his mouth began to water and had the sudden overwhelming desire to put the guys cock in his mouth. He suspected the sensation was a result of one or more of the man’s perks but didn't really care. 

The man saw his looking and gave a cocky wink. Leon felt like he was going to swoon. Maybe this would be his first encounter without Edward or even better maybe this man could be the third Edward had been searching for. He knew Edward at least could handle this big dicked wonder with his Charmers Basket perk and Leon could only hope his athleticism would let him as well.

Leon’s horny thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a muffled sobs coming from one of the stalls. He turned and felt his mouth fall open in shock as he saw the name tag floating above the stall. Hunter, level six wretch. 

With a deep sigh he stepped away from the Big Dicked Wonder and marched up to the stall, wrapping on the door twice with his fists, the natural ridges of bone grown up over his knuckles from his Brass Knuckle perk made a loud noise on the metal door that echoed around the bathroom. 

“Occupied,” a high nasally voice said from the other side sniffling. 

“Hunter opens up, it's Leon” he called.

There was a pause then Hunter shouted “Go away” from the other side of the door.

Leon sighed, then activated his inner strength ability and checked the door with his shoulder, snapping the lock and causing the stall door to slam open with a crash. The Big Dicked Wonder gave them a sidelong glance before somehow tucking his massive dick back into his pants and hurrying back into the bar.

Inside Hunter sat on the toilet with his pants around his ankles and his head in his hands. He looked nothing like the fit frat president he had once been and even less like the raging roided out muscle bull he had become. His limbs were shrunken and spindly, face blotchy and his dick sitting flaccid between his legs was minute, like a sad baby carrot.

“Don’t look at me.” He shrieked when he saw Leon “Haven’t you done enough.” 

Leon felt a wave of both intense satisfaction and pity. He wanted to both laugh and also to help his poor pathetic former rival. He chose the more compassionate of the two. “Hunter let me help,” Leon said in as calming a voice as he could manage. 

“No! You made me like this. Just go away” Hunter said voice cracking as he buried his head in his hands, to hide the tears Leon suspected. 

Leon opened his mouth and then closed it. Edward with his 61 charisma would undoubtedly know just what to say to calm Hunter down and get him to open up. Leon however had no such ability and so instead chose to just stand there and wait for Hunter to say more, blocking any path out.

Eventually, when it was clear Leon wasn’t leaving like he asked Hunter did. “Cassy left me. She’s a Flower Power Hippie now that makes plants grow just by being near them and I’m this.” He gestured to his shriveled skinny body then stifled a few more sobs.

“Hey, at least you're level six,” Leon said trying to comfort him. His words only made Hunter sob harder. 

“I had to pick up trash on the side of the road and give food to homeless people,” He said as if recounting traumatic memories from war. “And all I got were these stupid perks that made me feel all guilty and stuff for the way I acted.”

“How awful,” Leon said though his sarcasm was lost on Hunter.

Hunter looked up at Leon’s towering bulk which filled the entire stall with a mix of disgust, admiration, and jealousy. It was a strange reversal of the way not too long ago Leon might have looked at Hunter. “I wouldn’t bother with these quests except these stupid notifications tell me if I reach level twenty I get to change classes to something called a Repentant, which has to be better than the Wretch class,” Hunter said. It was clear he had been itching to confide in someone. “I’ll never get there though.” Hunter said again slipping into self pity “My level six quest is impossible. I have to apologize to someone I wronged.” 

Leon did his best not to laugh. “You could apologize to me,” Leon said and Hunter looked up confused. “You know for trying to strangle me,” Leon clarified.

“Oh,” Hunter said. He took a second to compose himself as if he was about to receive a lethal injection. “I’m sorry for trying to kill you, two times I guess. My memory is a little hazy after I got that class and I wasn’t thinking clearly but the first time I guess was my fault or whatever. I just felt threatened by you and took it out in unhealthy ways.” 

Leon was surprised by the genuineness of the apology. So too was Hunter, his face twisted in confusion then into a smile as the number above his head changed to a seven and he leveled up. The physical changes were small, Leon suspected Hunter was only receiving a fractions of stat points each level, but his pale skin grew a shade more rosy and his body which looked like it could be knocked over by a breeze grew a bit more hale. 

“That felt kind of good,” Hunter admitted sitting up straight. “Maybe I should apologize to Cassie as well.” 

“If you want I have a whole table of folks you could apologize to out there,” Leon said gesturing outside. 

Hunter opened his mouth to say something but a colossal boom drowned him out. The entire bathroom shook and Leon only stayed standing due to his level 16 Indomitable perk. Hunter cowered into himself and lifted his hands to shield his head. “Stay here,” Leon said before rushing out of the bathroom into absolute chaos. 

It took a moment for Leon to process what he was seeing. A hole had been blown in the side of the bar. While most of the students were hurriedly fleeing out the door Leon’s friends along with a few other high-level students were actively engaged in combat. Leon cursed when he saw with who. 

A notification filled his vision. 

“Combat quest: defeat Alvis, level 32 Technocrat. Reward for success: XP, Spiked Pauldron of the Bashful Basher.” 

Under the notification were two options.

“Accept this quest. Yes or no?” 

Leon quickly accepted the quest and then joined the fray. Trent and Edward were in the process of evacuating the bar, Trent causing pieces of rubble to float into the air and Edward calming people with his words. Tag had ducked behind the bar and was furiously mixing drinks. That left only Olivia and Ruth facing off against Alvis. 

Their third roommate had clearly not been stagnant over the months since his plan had come to fruition. He had made some serious upgrades to mech, which was no longer a blocky behemoth but now a sleek smaller suit armor that moved with alarming swiftness.

Beams of white energy shot from a cannon on the mech’s back harrying Ruth and Olivia. Olivia deflected each one with her shield while Ruth dodged them swinging her gigantic sword with impossible ease. Each hit of her sword were blocked by a holographic hexagonal shields that swung up around the mech before becoming invisible again. 

Leon felt felt his Sentimental Strength perk activate. The perk lent him a boost of strength when he felt intense emotions, like sadness or pain or arousal as Edward had been delighted to discover. At that moment all he felt was rage. 

Leon charged forward and roared, his voice dropping several octaves and becoming thunderously loud. Olivia who was had been slowly pushed back by Alvis’s onslaught surged forward and Ruth redoubled her efforts, both bolstered by his level fifteen ability Battle Cry which granted a boost of strength and courage to allies who heard his shout.

Alvis seeing Leon turned to face him. He dismissively activated a technique which caused an electrified net to spring towards Ruth shocking and entangling her. The level sixteen Combat Medic from before rushed to her side as did Olivia, blocking the beams of energy sent to finish Ruth off. 

“Look who is all grown up. You got bigger” Alvis said, amplified voice sounding more sane then it did the last time they faced. 

“And you got uglier,” Leon said though he couldn’t actually see Alvis through the thick metal of the suit. “What do you want?” 

“I want your boyfriend to release me from that chastity spell,” Alvis said swinging a metal fist at Leon. Leon activated his Inner Strength ability and caught it, though the force still sent his feet sliding back into a table flipped over by the blast. 

“Not going to happen,” Leon growled. 

“Then I’ll just have to kill you both,” Alvis said bringing the mech's other hand over his head to smash down onto Leon. 

“That’s not going to happen either,” Leon yelled diving out of the way. He rolled behind the bar right next to Tag who wordlessly handed him a faintly glowing yellow shot. Leon downed it and felt his muscles swell slightly and his mind speed up. He nodded thanks to Tag then dove over the bar. 

Trent and Edward having finished evacuating the students ran up to his side while Olivia helped Ruth to her feet and the two came to join as well so that they were all facing down Alvis, ready to give the technocrat a true fight. 

Most great adventures in video games tend to end with a defeated bad guy, a kingdom set back in order, and a victorious hero. Our’s ends with a bar fight with a mech. That's because real life tends not to be so simple, and because this was not the end for Leon and Edward it was only the beginning. 

[blouisparadise]

Here are some amazing bottom Louis fics that were posted or completed during the month of November. We hope you enjoy this list. Happy reading!

1) Countdown | Mature | 2,057 words

Note: The main pairing is Louis/Tommy Shelby.  

Tommy Shelby, pack alpha of the Peaky Blinders, has taken notice of The Garrison Pub’s new barmaid, an omega named Louis.

2) When The Going Gets Tough | Explicit | 2,486 words

Harry is going into unexpectedly early rut and right then, his new boyfriend Louis decides to be a dick and make him jealous.

3) The Things Nobody Talks About  | Explicit | 4,883 words

Twenty eight year old Louis Tomlinson walks past his stepsons room only to see the boy asleep spread out naked in bed with only a pillow covering his manhood and his arm over his face. His sheets are disheveled and it looks like he had a good time before passing out, but the reality is probably less exciting. England has been having a terribly hot summer and they don’t have air con. Louis stands at the door and looks in at the boy as he lays there. He has tattoos littering his fit wide chest and down his beautiful body and his long legs are spread out on the bed. He looks very inviting, Louis is sure he wouldn’t appreciate waking up to his overly horny stepfather ravishing him. Louis was married to Harry’s adoptive dad who passed away last year. Louis and Harry decided to continue living together even without his dad being around because they got on really well and have always been close. Louis and his late husband married when Harry was just nine years old so Louis became kind of another dad to him. Now Harry is an eighteen year old uni student who is home for summer break. Louis is still single and doesn’t get out much after becoming widower.

4) I Fall To Pieces When I'm With You (Cherry Kisses) | Explicit | 4,924 words

Where Louis lives in the country side of London and has a sort of long distance relationship with Italian Harry.

5) Do You Think We'll Be In Love (Forever)? | Mature | 4,983 words

Louis is the babysitter for Harry's children. The alpha invites him to spend the weekend with them at the summer house and there they put an end to the desires and fantasies of the two.

6) Eyes Full Of Stars, Heart Full Of Sins | Mature | 5,453 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

As their soul-tying ceremony approaches, Louis reminisces about his relationship with Harry, how they fell in love amidst the war, and how an uncertain foundation still led them to undeniable love.

7) Raise You Up, Pin You Down | Explicit | 5,679 words

Louis felt a bit distracted by the movement of the alphas lips, wet and pink. He gulped. “You can’t just pick up a stranger like that!” His green eyes flashed mischievously. “When I see a poor little helpless omega like you, I have to help. It’s in my nature.”  Signs of another smug look tugged at his lips. When Louis can't, for the life of him, reach the bar to get his drink, he's surprised with a little help from a handsome and cocky stranger.

8) Just Keep Holding Onto Me (And I’ll Hold You) | Explicit | 7,058 words

Harry, Louis, Zayn and Niall reminiscing and grieving together after Liams funeral.

9) I Used To Call You My Best Friend Way Back Before You Were My Everything | Explicit | 6,670 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

“Okay, this is going to sound insane, but I really can’t stop thinking about you.” Louis’ eyes widened and his heart skipped. “How do you mean?” he whispered. “I mean. I kind of, like, want you. And like. I don’t know if I can have you.” “Oh, yes you absolutely can,” Louis gained confidence at Harry’s sudden lack thereof. “What? I was supposed to look after you, and now, not only have I gone and put myself in a position to not be there for you, but I also just. Want you. What would everyone think?” “Harry, I—I want you, too. Who cares what anyone thinks? Do you mean my parents? They’ll live, considering they love you more than they love their own sons sometimes.”

10) Wild Love | Mature | 7,206 words

Louis don’t know how he ended up like that, he was just taking photos to post online, and now he has an feral alpha on top of him, scenting all his determination out, suddenly there seems cozy and a good place to be.

11) I Dig Your Cinema | Explicit | 7,331 words

Harry Styles is a famous actor in town. Louis Tomlinson doesn't care about him at all. Well, at least that's what Louis thinks. But when Harry's on his knees in front of Louis in the bathroom of a night club, he begins to draw different conclusions.

12) Free Falling | Explicit | 7,710 words

Harry came to London for a visit after meeting Louis at Superbloom, but he never really left. Now, sharing a life and a bed with Louis, he’s fallen deeply in love - but he doesn’t know if Louis feels the same. Navigating daily laughter and longing, Harry faces the uncertainty of their undefined bond. Is he truly part of Louis’ world, or just a passing chapter? As doubts build, he wonders: will their fragile connection deepen into something real, or will it slip away before it ever truly begins?

13) Always Yours | Explicit | 8,018 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Jealous and Possessive Harry when someone new arrives in their group and has a crush on Louis.

14) On a Night Like Tonight | Mature | 8,635 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Pop star meets star football player, aka Taylor Swift/Travis Kelce AU.

15) Airplanes & Apple Pies | Not Rated | 8,987 words

Harry & Louis are strangers flying home for Thanksgiving. They bond as the only passengers in business class - things may or may not get a little heated...

16) Cross My Heart And Hope You Die | Explicit | 9,347 words

Something about this man is getting under Harry’s skin in a record time. “Aren’t you going to introduce yourself?” he questions after a moment of silence. Tomlinson exhales a cloud of smoke, smirks and then shrugs. “I know who you are. You know who I am. What’s the point?”

17) Home | Mature | 9,988 words

Louis has a crush on Harry, and Harry has a crush on Louis and they obviously don't know about each other.

18) Lights Go Down | Explicit | 10,449 words

Note: The main pairing is Louis/Zayn Malik.

Louis is in need of the perfect dom, and the best dom in the club has just parted ways with his regular sub. Can Louis be the sub Zayn wants?

19) A Flicker Of Hope That I Wanna Keep (Please Don’t Leave) | Mature | 12,230 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Harry is in love with Louis, and he had thought Louis felt the same until he accidentally left his journal in Harry’s home. He knows he shouldn’t have read it, especially when it only proved to be a reality check he didn’t want. Once Harry finds the green-eyed, curly-haired, gangly fucker that’s stolen Louis’ heart, he’d like to have a strong word with him.

20) Our Sacred Place | Explicit | 15,842 words

Harry knows that, if he wants to keep something from his husband, he has to do it carefully, considering Louis' curious nature. Mia, their daughter, feels capable of helping her dad in this mision so that everything devolps successfully.

21) We’re Leading Each Other Out Of The Dark | Not Rated | 16,187 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Harry leaves and never looks back, only for him to eventually come home to find Louis and a little girl that looks exactly like him.

22) Meet Me At The Rat Hole | Explicit | 16,934 words

Harry's voice drifts into a nervous ramble. “I mean, I know it’s not my place, but he deserves someone who’s gonna make him laugh, not just… not just be there, and—” Shane holds up a hand, cutting him off, his face twisting into a sneer. “Oh, I get it now. You want to fuck him.” Harry and Louis are best friends. Harry is in love with Louis. But Louis has a boyfriend named Shane. He suuuuuuucks. Harry and Louis want to go see the Rat Hole. but again, Shane sucks. Let's see what happens.

23) After Hours | Mature | 17,605 words

"I want you to take me all night when you get back," Louis whispered against Harry's lips. "You think you can handle me all night?" Harry teased. "You know i can." Louis replied confidently, a smirk curling at the corner of his lips.

24) Wolves, I Hear Them Calling For You | Mature | 18,392 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Harry was in love with Louis, but the omega definitely didn't see him that way. Or maybe he did.

25) Raspberry Juice | Explicit | 18,657 words

1. Louis will take the farthest bedroom down the hall. 2.Louis’ room is off limits. 3.No going through Louis’ things 4.Will share food, just ask first. 5.Louis will take two showers. One in the morning and again at night. So, don’t hog the bathroom at either time. 6.Only one guest permitted at once. 7.No parties. Ever. 8.Keep listening/viewing entertainment at low volume. 9.If you're gonna pop your knot, I don’t need to hear the experience while it’s happening. 10.Be out of the apartment every third Thursday-Sunday of the month so I can help my omega with their heat. This list was perfectly fine when Harry first moved in. But Harry's somehow grown attached to the scent of his roommate's omega...even if he's never seen them. He's desperate to catch a glimpse of the couple, to force his wolf to understand the omega is taken. He has no idea it will end in him getting a taste of his own.

26) Limelight | Mature | 20,056 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

During his first semester at Boston University circa 1989, a shy, socially awkward Harry meets a kind, outspoken Louis. In an attempt to show Louis how he feels, he creates a mixtape of songs. But Harry’s deep anxieties cloud him, and he can’t seem to understand whether or not Louis even wants him around, let alone likes him back.

27) In The Spotlight, In His Arms | Not Rated | 20,115 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Popstar Harry Styles and uni student Louis. Harry accidentally goes live on Instagram and his phone captures Louis sleeping peacefully. That’s how he introduces Louis as his boyfriend to the world. The world falls in love with Louis Tomlinson but will everyone really? Slight angst, insecure Louis, but lots of fluff and Louis is so easy to fall in love with.

28) Waiting For The Winds To Change | Explicit | 21,366 words

After leaving his husband, Harry retreats to a remote beach house owned by a friend to escape the tangled mess his life has become. Looking for nothing but a few weeks of peace and tranquility by the water, Harry plans to get his thoughts in order as he prepares to start his life over again. When a stranger arrives, seeking refuge from an approaching storm, Harry is thrust into a whirlwind romance full of self discovery, some hard truths and more than just a few realisations. As the waves come crashing in, their little bubble bursts and when Louis’ own secrets are revealed, Harry must decide if he’s ready to jump head first into something that could inevitably leave him heartbroken and right back where he started.

29) One Last Time | Explicit | 24,295 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Louis is a werewolf, and Harry is a vampire. They’re supposed to hate each other, but they’re too busy fucking to care.

30) My Everything | Explicit | 31,061 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

They got to the building and right before the door of the elevator opened to the lobby, Harry grabbed Louis’ hand and brought him to his chest. “See you later, my love?” he brought Louis to him for a soft kiss. Louis smiled, blue eyes studying Harry’s face closely before he moved his tie back, patting his chest tenderly. “Go save the world, Agent.” Harry chuckled and pecked his lips again. “You’re ridiculous.” Louis scrunched his nose happily, “See you at lunch?” “Always.” He pecked his lips again before the door of the elevator opened to their new day.

31) No Bananas In The Library | Not Rated | 36,436 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Sometimes it all starts with a dare, sometimes the dare comes later, and sometimes the dare is actually the push someone needs to be brave enough to talk to someone. Louis wouldn’t say Harry is his enemy but that loud frat boy can be incredibly annoying, always disturbing Louis when he tries to study, and Louis has certainly told him so. And he’s always eating his disgusting bananas. However, one day Harry approaches him to say that he wants to get to know Louis.

32) In Dreams You're Mine | Explicit | 37,530 words

Harry age 10, and Louis age 12, meet on a seaside holiday and become the best of friends. Their visit to a fortune teller sets off a series of events that changes their lives and dreams forever.

33) I Want You To Need Me | Explicit | 37,609 words

For Harry, finding his soulmate had always been his life goal. For Louis, soulmarks don't matter as long as he loves the person he’s with. And he truly loves Harry. Fate brought them together, on Harry’s 18th birthday, and they couldn’t stay away from each other, even if they tried. Louis is sure their marks will match, their love is that strong. But how will it affect Louis when Harry’s mark doesn’t match his and Harry decides to go find his one true love?

34) Wherever You Are (That's Where I'll Be) | Mature | 50,151 words

Harry took a deep breath, his fingers tightening into a fist. “I... I haven’t been sleeping well. Actually, I haven’t been sleeping much at all,” he admitted, his voice hoarse. “It’s been getting worse for weeks now. I think it started with nightmares, but now... it’s something else.” Dr. Sinclair leaned forward slightly, his eyes focused on Harry. “Something else?” “Voices,” Harry whispered, almost as if he was afraid saying it aloud would make them worse. “I’ve been hearing voices, even when I’m awake.”

35) From Underneath Your Glow | Explicit | 53,524 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

With years of bitter experience and a tuition debt that would outlast three generations, Louis did what anyone in his position would; he developed an almost flawless five-step system for scamming alphas.

36) Forever Yours | Mature | 54,130 words

Harry and Louis are very much in love and expecting their first baby together. Everything is perfect until it's not anymore and hearts get shattered, promises broken... Five years later, Harry comes back after realizing the life he left behind was the one he should have chosen all along. Is it too late or can he get his family back?

37) Total Distraction | Explicit | 57,805 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Love On Tour just finished and Harry finds himself being shipped off to Mykonos for three weeks alone. He expects to spend them bored and lonely until Louis comes sashaying down the beach and changes his life forever... or at least for the next three weeks.

38) Midnight Doesn’t Last Forever | Explicit | 63,658 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

When Harry learns that his beloved grandfather has passed away, he also discovers that he's inherited the lake house that he so fondly remembers from childhood. However, it comes with a stipulation - he must be legally married before he can take possession of it. Enter his best friend, Louis, who is an accident-prone freelancer who has a desperate need for health insurance. All seems to be going well with the plan until Louis finds himself in an unfortunate accident that robs him of his memories of Harry and their marriage of convenience.

39) As The Summer Fades Away | Explicit | 66,491 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

Harry and Louis were not supposed to be. And that was a fact Louis had been very aware of for the past decade. It was just the way the universe was. And Louis knew there was no bending and pushing that would change the facts. Harry was his neighbor and his father’s best friend. A constant in Louis’s life for years. Sturdy and unmoving, with an ever present frown pulling on his mouth. Unattainable. When Louis landed back in Texas after graduating college, he learned that sometimes the universe could bend a little at his will.

40) I Love It Better If I Repeat It Many Times; Firefly, Firefly, Firefly  | Not Rated | 65,661 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

“Louis, don't marry him.” he gasped loudly as the alpha cornered him at the engagement party. Louis watched behind Harry to make sure that no one was paying attention to them. “Please don't.” he begged, Louis' blood was boiling, he roughly pulled away from the curly’s firm grip. He couldn't believe his audacity. “What's wrong with you? You just asked Naomi for her hand, you asshole!” He yelled through clenched teeth, still looking behind his back. Harry shook his head for a few seconds, holding his hair that was ruined in a flash. “I can't believe it. You’re-” “I know you don't love him. I saw it in your eyes, Lou. Please.” The brunette omega fell silent, opening his mouth in astonishment, the ring he'd received from Rowan identical to Naomi's weighed heavier against the accusation that fell from the alpha on him. Harry took a step closer, they were practically already close from a start, right now, their chests were brushing. He watched his pleading gaze, his large, warm hands clinging to his arms, Louis felt his mark burning. “Harry-” “If you ask me, I won't get married. If you ask me, I’ll give up on all of this.” His heart along with his knees went weak.

41) I Know Your Love’s Not Real | Mature | 67,890 words

Note: This fic was written for the Bottom Louis Fic Fest. Check out the full collection here.

With a simple bet that could’ve given him his ticket out of this town, Louis finds that taking the virginity of the nerdy alpha came with lots of difficulties and consequences. One being his lack of patience, the other being a broken heart.

42) Bring Me To Life | Explicit | 143,572 words

Louis no longer wants to live and his plan to leave the world behind was almost a success. Almost. That is, until Harry, a vampire, saves Louis' life and grants him immortality with his bite. However, Louis is far from grateful when he wakes up to his new reality. Harry had envisioned the creation of his first offspring very differently and now has to deal with a suicidal young vampire who hates him and constantly tries to end his own existence. As they navigate their tumultuous relationship, they begin to uncover secrets about Louis' family that could change everything they thought they knew.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

You can find other monthly roundup fic rec lists here.

[starrihan]

Happy New Year, Kiss Me - New Years with Enhypen

-> Pairing: Enhypen x afab! Reader

-> Plot: how you would spend New Year's with the Enhypen members

-> Genre: fluff, Heeseung's is slightly suggestive, Jake's is very suggestive

-> Warnings: drinking, use of nicknames (love, darling, sweetie, baby), hyung line scenario's take place at Jay's new year's party

-> Word Count: 3,143, each one got progressively longer as i continued writing (350-500 words each)

-> Notes: Happy New Year! I hope you all enjoy reading these as much as I enjoyed writing them! Hope you all have a wonderful new year and lets hope 2025 goes better than this year did (for me at least) 🤧

-> Here's a link to all my other masterlists!

༄ ༄ ༄

Heeseung: 

The New Year’s party was something you had been looking forward to. After all the anticipation of Christmas had passed, you were ready to welcome the new year with open arms. You made your way to Jay’s house. He hosted the New Year’s party every year, always making it better each time. 

You arrived at the party shortly after it began, fixing your hair in the car before knocking on the door. 

“Hey guys! Y/N’s here!”

Jay says, opening the door and giving you a hug as you walk in. You make your way to the kitchen, where you find Sunghoon and Jake. 

“Hey Y/N! You look amazing!” 

Sunghoon says, pouring you a glass of champagne. 

“Thank you! You both look really handsome as well!” 

You sip at your drink, making your way around and greeting everyone you knew until you finally found the boy you were looking for.

“Heeseung! Finally!” 

You walk up to the tall, brown haired man who was talking with a couple of his other friends. 

“Y/N! It’s so good to see you! I’m sorry I was a bit distracted! You look really good!”

He says, pulling you in for a hug. You just chuckle and tell him it’s alright, joining the conversation and laughing amongst the group. 

As the time approaches 12 a.m, you look around, watching everyone break away into pairs, presumably with the person they plan on kissing. You realize that the only other guy without a partner is Heeseung. He looks down at you and smiles, 

“Guess you’re my New Year’s kiss, Y/N,”

You smile up at him, nodding as you watch the big flat screen tv countdown. 

60 seconds…

30 seconds…

10 seconds…

3…

2…

1…

“Happy New Year’s!”

The whole house erupts as everyone looks to their partner, sharing a quick kiss. You look up at Heeseung who is already leaning in, closing your eyes as your lips meet. The kiss doesn’t last for long, but you can feel yourself relaxing into his touch, hands holding his face as he pulls away and flashes you a smirk. 

“Your lips are so soft, we should do this again sometime,” 

You laugh as you playfully hit his chest at his flirty tone, but not before giving him a flirty reply back,

“Let’s see where the end of the night takes us~”

༄ ༄ ༄

Jay:

You woke up in the morning to help your boyfriend, Jay, prepare for the party that was being thrown in your shared home. It was your job to decorate while he got drinks and snacks. 

You spent the morning taping up streamers and making sure the centerpieces looked right. You had provided little hats and glasses that say 2025 on them, loving little corny accessories. 

As the day progressed, you got yourself ready for the party. After showering, you got started on your makeup, waiting for your hair to dry. After finishing that, you fixed your hair before slipping on a silver sequin dress, one that you knew Jay would not be able to keep his eyes off of. You had decided to keep your outfit a surprise, wanting to see his reaction to you wearing it for the first time before the party started. 

“Wow, you look absolutely stunning,”

He says, awestruck, taking your hand and having you do a little twirl. 

“I’m glad you like it! I’ve been dying to show you!” 

You say, embracing him and pecking his lips.

“C’mon, the guests will be here soon!” 

You say, making your way downstairs to greet the first round of guests. 

“Y/N! Jay! You guys look beautiful!” 

Jake exclaims, walking in with his girlfriend, a big smile plastered on his face. 

“You guys really out did yourself this year!” 

He makes his way to the kitchen, pouring him and his girlfriend some drinks. 

You enjoy your night talking to your friends and Jay, relishing in the compliments you were getting at the successful party you managed to throw, yet again. 

“1 minute till midnight!” 

Jay yells, grabbing everyone’s attention for the New Year’s tradition. As the countdown reaches 1, you look to Jay who's already looking at you. 

“Happy New Year my love~”

“Happy New Year Jay!”

You both say to each other, leaning in for a passionate kiss, one that lasted longer than most people’s. You smiled at him, taking in the feeling of being together for another new year.

“We’re really good at this”

“Yes we are”

༄ ༄ ༄

Jake:

You looked at yourself in the mirror, fixing your hair and making sure your makeup was on point, matching the style and color of your black and silver dress. 

“My baby, looking stunning as always,” 

Jake says, leaning on the door frame. 

“Almost makes me wanna keep you here all night…”

He walks behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his head on your shoulder, giving your cheek a quick peck. 

“Do we have to go? You look too good…”

He whines, hands traveling up and down your sides now, trying to entice you to stay. You laugh as you put your hands over his, stopping his movements.

“Jake, it’s your best friends party, we have to go! Besides, if you behave, I’ll show you what’s under this dress,”

You say back to him, staring into his eyes through the mirror. He buries his face in your neck, smirking as he trails kisses up towards your ear. 

“I guess we can go then. What’s a few hours anyways when we’ll be up all night?” 

“Let’s go you horn ball,”

You say, grabbing the car keys on your way out. You walk up to the door and knock, Jake right next to you as you’re greeted by Jay and his girlfriend. You head to the kitchen, talking with Jake’s friends as he pours you and himself a drink. 

You find yourself pretty tipsy but the time midnight rolls around, finding ways to tease Jake due to your own pent-up state. 

“Weren’t you the one who told me to behave before we left?”

He quirks an eyebrow at you, finding your wondering hands amusing. 

“You gave me too much to drink… you know how I get when I’m tipsy”

You say, cheeks flushed and vision slightly blurry, staring at Jake as he holds your hand, gesturing to the tv. 

“Only 5 more minutes, yeah? Then we can head home and I can give you what you’re so desperately needing,”

Voice dripping with honey as he whispers seductively in your ear, your need for him increasing with every passing minute. The countdown begins, you’re so eager, staring at Jake and almost kissing him before midnight. He laughs and holds you off, waiting till the last second.

“Happy New Year’s baby, now come here”

You don’t even say it back, smashing your lips onto his in a hungry kiss.

“Beautiful, happy New Years! Can we go home now?”

He laughs and nods, letting himself be dragged out the door while shouting his goodbyes to all his friends. 

“Let’s see what you have on under that dress,”

(whenever i read/ write stuff about Jake that has him saying shit like this I always picture this emoji 😛)

༄ ༄ ༄

Sunghoon:

Sunghoon is a very punctual person. So he was rightfully annoyed when you were taking your sweet time getting ready, thus making you guys 15 minutes late to Jay’s New Year’s party. 

“I’m sorry! My hair wasn’t working with me and I couldn’t get my eyeliner right!”

You say, scrambling into the car as quickly as your heels would allow you to. He just sighed and started driving,

“You had more than enough time to get ready.” 

He said sternly. You sighed back in response. You couldn’t argue with him, he was right. You did have many hours to get ready, and you still somehow managed to be late.

“You’re right Hoon, I’m sorry.”

He could sense how apologetic you were, resting his hand on your thigh and giving it a little squeeze. 

“It’s alright sweetheart. It’s only Jay, he won’t care. Plus, we can be fashionably late now. You do look gorgeous.”

He says, and you smile, feeling at ease as you pull up to the party. 

“Please don’t let me drink tonight, I still haven’t recovered from the Christmas party,” 

You say, stepping out of the car and walking up to the front door, hand in hand with Sunghoon. 

“Don’t beg me to give you one when you get bored then.”

You walk into the house, immediately greeted by Jay and Sunghoon’s other friends. You all congregate in the living room, laughing and exchanging stories as if you hadn’t seen these people just 5 days ago. 

“Jay you always make the best drinks but I can’t have any today. I don’t want a repeat of the Christmas party…” 

You laugh sheepishly, recalling the light-headed state you were in that had Sunghoon worried sick that you were going to throw up. You go to the kitchen to grab a snack and Sunghoon follows you in, back-hugging you as you pop a couple of candies into your mouth. 

“Can I have one?”

You laugh as you place a candy in his already open mouth, following it up with a quick kiss. 

“Hey! Save the kisses for the new year!” 

He says playfully to which you roll your eyes, heading back to the living room. You watch as everyone yells in excitement, getting ready to kiss their partners as the timer hits 10 seconds. You all count down with it, shouting “happy new year!,” before looking at Sunghoon, smiling before planting a loving kiss on his lips. 

“Happy new year, my love. I can’t wait to spend another year with you.”

You say, arms around his neck still, his hands squeezing at your waist.

“Happy new years baby, I love you.”

༄ ༄ ༄

Sunoo:

You had decided to spend new years with Sunoo's family this year. You spent last year with your family, so you only thought it would be fair to have this year with his family. 

“Sunoo, baby? Are you almost ready? Your family is waiting for us!” 

You said, hurriedly grabbing your belongings. They had invited you to spend the weekend with them after new years, so you had to make sure you had everything you’d need packed. 

“Yes I’m almost done! And why are you packing? You have everything you need at my house?”

You stare at the little bag you have, only a couple makeup products and new skincare items in there. You were so nervous, you forgot that you basically live there too.

“You’re right. I’m sorry I’m just nervous. We’ve spent a lot of time with your parents but I’ve never met your entire family before.” 

You look at him and sulk, fidgeting your fingers and looking down at your pathetic bag. He walks over to you, holding your hands in his. 

“It’s okay sweetie, they’re gonna love you. And even if they don’t, who cares? I love you.” 

You smile as he places a chaste kiss to your forehead. 

“Let’s go, I’m ready.” 

You nod as you make your way to the car, grabbing the little bag of stuff anyways. 

Upon arriving at Sunoo’s parents house, you sigh as you mentally prepare yourself. You knock on the door and are immediately greeted by Sunoo’s mom who pulls you in for a big hug. 

“Y/N, my darling! I’ve missed you so much! Come in!”

You smile as you feel more at ease. You slip off your shoes as Sunoo greets his mom. You look around to see that mostly everyone is distracted, having conversations amongst their own little groups. 

Sunoo takes you around, introducing you to every one of his family members. You slowly warm up to everyone, being able to make conversation on your own and even being invited out by his other family members for future events. 

As the day passes by, you realize that there’s only a couple minutes left until the new year begins. You start to feel a little shy, the idea of kissing Sunoo while all his family is present is a little bit anxiety-inducing. He can sense your unease, calmly gripping onto your shoulders and pulling you close. 

“I can see that you’re still nervous baby, but it’s okay. They’re all gonna see us kiss on our wedding day anyways, right?” 

You smile and nod, blushing as you wrap your arms around him and bury your face in his neck. The countdown begins and you two join in, staring into each others eyes at the final ‘3, 2, 1,’ before gently leaning in, sharing a short but sweet kiss. 

“Happy New Year Y/N. I’m so lucky to have spent another year with you,” 

He says, leaning his forehead on yours. 

“Happy New Year Sunoo. I’m even luckier~”

༄ ༄ ༄

Jungwon: 

This was the first New Year’s that you would be spending with Jungwon. You had decided to just spend it together at your apartment. You had been invited to a couple of New Year’s parties but you wanted your first one with Jungwon to be special and a little more intimate, without the social pressures of dressing up and making conversation with people you barely know. 

You had decorated a little bit, wanting it to feel a little bit more celebratory than just another night in. You kept it simple though, a couple streamers and silly little party hats to take pictures in. You finish setting up the table with some snacks when you hear a knock on your door, running faster than you’d care to admit to open it. 

“Jungwon!!!” 

You yelled, jumping into his arms for a hug.

“I’m really excited to see you too baby but can we go inside? It’s cold out here…” 

He says as he laughs, entering the warm apartment. He’s welcomed with the familiar scent of your home, sighing as he places his bag down and gives you a proper hug. 

“I missed you baby. I’m so glad we’re spending new years here, together, instead of at some lame party.” 

“Don’t let Jay find out that you called his party lame otherwise he might lecture you on the difficulties of being a good host.”

You both laugh as you break away from each other, Jungwon walking to your living room while you walk to the kitchen. You grab the bottle of champagne you had bought, walking out with it and two champagne glasses in your hands. 

“Even though we’re not at a party, a little champagne is always fitting for the occasion!”

You say as you set the glasses on the table, Jungwon helping you with the bottle.

“Ooh! Can I pop the bottle?” 

You nod as you sit back, letting him pop the top off and laughing when you see a bit of smoke coming out of it. 

“I thought it was gonna spray everywhere,”

 he says, disappointed. 

“I’m glad it didn’t.”

You spend the time sipping away at the champagne and watching trashy reality tv shows, cuddling up under a blanket. You’re so immersed in your activity that you almost miss the clock flashing to 11:59 pm. 

You tap Jungwon and put your glass down, turning to him in excitement.

“1 more minute!!!”

You guys both giggle as you start a mini countdown to each other. 

“3!”

“2!”

“1!”

“Happy New Year!!”

You both yell to each other before leaning in for a kiss. You let it last for a while, not having to worry about the duration of the kiss. 

“I’m glad we decided to spend our first new years like this. I couldn’t have asked for a better way to celebrate.” 

He says, cat-like eyes disappearing in a big smile that engulfs his face. 

“You took the words right out of my mouth.”

༄ ༄ ༄

Niki:

You and Niki hadn’t been together long. You guys met about 8 months ago, but only start dating 2 months ago, so everything romantic still felt pretty new to you both. When you had gotten the news that you’d be going to a New Year’s party that Niki’s friends were throwing, you were very excited yet nervous, to say the least. You’d met his friends before, but never all together at once. 

You were getting ready at your house, opting to start early since Niki would be coming to pick you up. You looked in the mirror as you finished doing your hair, making sure everything looks right. You hear your phone go off besides you:

“Hey darling, I’m outside.”

You read Niki’s message and smile, grabbing your purse before making your way to his car. You find him standing by your door, having already opened it for you. 

“You look gorgeous m’lady,” 

He says, smiling as you laugh as his playfully formal demeanor. 

“You’re looking quite dashing yourself, good sir,” 

You say as you walk into the car. He closes the door for you and you make your way to the party that was at Jake’s house. 

“You look really beautiful. I can’t wait to spend this new year with you.”

You blush and look away, fingers playing with the hand that he kept on your thigh. 

“You're too cute Niki. Thank you. You look really good too! The suit suits you,”

You laugh at your own joke before arriving at Jake’s house. You walk out of the car and head up to the front door, Niki following behind you. Without even knocking on the door, the door flies open revealing an excited Jake. 

“Y/N!! You’re here!” 

He says, dragging you inside. 

“Hey, what about me?” 

Niki sulks as he walks in, jokingly bitter about not being greeted by Jake. 

“I’m glad you guys could come! Thank you Y/N for coming out here tonight. We were all so excited to have you!”

You smile at Jake’s sweet words, leaning your head on Niki’s shoulder as you all engage in conversation. 

The night goes smoothly, playing games while the adults drink champagne and you and Niki stick to drinking cider. 

“Get ready guys, 5 minutes till midnight!”

Heeseung says, going over to his girlfriend. All the boys go to their significant others, waiting for the countdown to begin. You stay next to Niki, anticipating the countdown. You guys had kissed before, but with you both being so busy and still new to the relationship, you weren’t used to it yet. 

The countdown begins, everyone getting excited and yelling as the numbers go down. 

You look up at Niki, who is smiling down as the final 3 seconds pass, leaning down to capture your lips in a sweet kiss. 

“Happy New Year darling.”

“Happy New Year Niki~” 

༄ ༄ ༄

-> Here's a link to all my other masterlists!

[phantomamour]

𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐨𝐚𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐞, 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐭

racer!billy the kid x reader •*⁀➷ countdown to abu dhabi

cw// none really. a good amount of flirting, but really all just fluff to start off the countdown

“You don’t have to come with me. It’s too cold out there anyways.”

“If it’s too cold for me to sit on the sand, then it’s especially too cold for you to go surfing, Billy.”

“It’s more so swimming than surfing, baby. No waves out there.”

The Bahrain Grand Prix wasn’t set to start until six, and with Billy not needing to be at the track until noon, he was determined to get in the all-too-beautiful waters along the city's edge. If it wasn’t for Billy’s love for fast cars, you think he may have gotten his fill of adrenaline in life from surfing. You never complained about the many early mornings you had accompanied him to the beach in Miami, Singapore, and Mexico last season, as he’d always wrapped you up in his jacket and a blanket on the sand. Leaving you with a soft kiss before you’d watch him ride the waves with a smile that could only be beaten by the one he sported inside his car.

You knew his desire to go out now was fueled by just how antsy he was to race; he needed to be in the water more than he needed to pace the paddock. After months off, the season's first race was a thrilling experience, and he’d snagged a starting position in the top 5 after a great qualifying session. In his excitement, he’d barely been able to sleep the whole night despite your attempts at tiring him out. Even with the tired look in your eyes from your many exhausting attempts at getting him to relax enough to sleep, he knew that his offer for you to stay in bed would only be met with more protest as he wrapped his team jacket around your shoulders and tucked a blanket into his bag. 

“Are you looking forward to the race?” you asked as you walked hand-in-hand down the steps to the beach from your hotel. You already knew the answer –of course, he was– but you also knew him well enough to know that he needed to get it off his chest as he nearly vibrated next to you, able to tell that he wasn’t shivering from the cold.

“I think this is my year, baby. Maybe it’s foolish to think that, but… I feel good about it. Yesterday went well, and maybe my hopes are too high, but I think I can at least get my first win this year.” He sounded hesitant, in all honesty, but you knew that with him freshly out of “rookie” status, hoping for much more than a win was what took too many drivers down later in the season. He had yet to win a grand prix in his F1 career, and you knew he was anxious to get that moment on the top of the podium like he had in F2. 

“Well, I will scream the loudest out of everyone when you stand up there this year. Maybe even flash you a little,” you teased before he laughed with his head thrown back, arm moving around your shoulder and holding you tight to his side as your feet sunk into the first step of sand.

“You better not do that until we are in the privacy of my room. That view is exclusively mine,” he insisted as he led you to a small flat of sand, “This okay for you, baby?” When you nodded in response, he quickly pulled out the blanket from his bag and wrapped you in it where you had sat down in the sand, still a bit cold as the sun rose over the horizon. You couldn’t help how you stared as he took off his hoodie; he had trained harder than ever over the winter break, and now your eyes got to reap the rewards. His toned chest and strong arms warmed you right up even as the sand tried to steal every bit of it beneath you.

“Feeling a little objectified over here,” he smirked at you as he rested the hoodie over your bare feet. 

“You can objectify me later in return. Right now I’m enjoying the view too much to care.” He laughed as he flexed his arms, only to receive a handful of sand to the chest with your own laugh.

“Show off. Go get in the water before I drag you back to the hotel, and find a better way to spend this time before we go to the paddock.” He hummed in response, feigning having to think it over before leaning down to kiss the top of your head.

“I’ll be back. Stay warm, and come get me if you want to go back earlier… Then I’ll find a few different ways to heat you up,” he spoke softly, a slight tease in his last words as he ensured your blanket was still wrapped snuggly around your shoulders. You watched as he made his way down to the water, the muscles in his back catching your attention as he lowered himself beyond where you could see. This was everything you wanted, everything he had worked for, and you had done your best to support him through it all. You’d wake up well before sunrise any day to see the smile that racing brought to his face and stay up far past midnight to listen to his antsy rants about wanting to win a race.

There was nowhere in the world you wouldn’t follow him, and while he had been worried about high hopes, you had just the same ones for the season ahead of you two. 

[astrolynnworld]

blue confessions

pairing: matt x reader

summary: matt confesses his feelings to the reader at the countdown of midnight

warnings: fluff! new years, confessions, love, romance.

a/n- should of been posted yesterday but oh well 🫠

word count: 979

i do some last minute cleansing and preparations as i get ready to start my year anew and fresh.

nick had invited a few friends over so we can celebrate our last hours of 2023 together.

i finish getting ready and put on my coat so i can head over to the house.

everyone arrived at various times but i was one of the first people to get there.

i’ve been friends with the triplets for about 7 years now, at first i met nick but he soon after introduced me to his brothers who i’ve been close with every since.

especially matt, matt is really like my best friend. since day one, matt & i have have a different type of connection where we understand each other on a different level

he’s always been there for me, as i have with him.

“hey!! happy new year” nick says as he opens the door to let me in

“happy new year!” i say while going in for a hug

“wow it’s been in a long year.” i continue

“tell me about it.. a lot has happened this year, from hitting 5 million subs to going on tour again.. it’s been a crazy year”

“yup, sad to see it end but ready to watch it go” i laugh

from the corner of my eye i can see chris coming up the stairs

“oh hey chris! happy new year” i say as i walk in for a hug

“yup! new year.” he greets back, “where’s the food?” he proceeds to ask

“chris shut up. it’s on the way, you can wait.” nick answers annoyingly

i chuckle at their banter

“where’s matt?” i ask out loud

“he’s probably in still his room getting ready, you can go check on him if you want” nick responds

i nod and make my way down the hall to his room.

i do my little signature knock that i do so he knows it’s me

“come in!” he shouts from the door

i open the door and walk in to give him a hug

“heyyy matt!!” i gleefully say

“why are you so happy?” he asks with a confused face

“cause it’s new year’s eve!!” i respond with more enthusiasm

“big plans for 2024?” he asks

“no plans, just hopes and wants.” i respond

“yeah? what do you hope and want?” he asks again

“i kinda hope for a genuine connection and relationship..” i say shyly

“really?”

“yeah. i just feel like im tired of meaningless flings or situationships. we’re only getting older.. i want something real” i say

“i feel you 100%” he reassures

“yeah.” i look down, “but anyway! do you have anything you’re looking forward too?”

“not really. i just wanna let the year play out how it’s supposed too.” he replies

“yeah i see th-“ im interrupted as the door swings open

“our friends are here. stop hiding in the room” says nick

“we’re not hiding” matt says as he gets up to make his way to the living room

i follow shortly behind

after a few hours of party games and jokes, we just hang around to enjoy our last few minutes of 2023

i go in the kitchen to grab some water and shortly after, matt follows along

he nervously stands there in silence for a bit pretending to be occupied before striking up a conversation

“before the year end i kinda just wanted to let you know that i really do appreciate our friendship” he says sentimentally

“aww matt, that’s so sweet.”

“i know i don’t really say it often but i do love you. maybe in more ways than i should to be honest.” he looks down

“huh? what do you mean?” i ask

“well you’re the person i can count on the most, other than nick and chris. you’re always there for me when i need you to be and i feel like i relate you on a deeper level. you just understand me as a person and i love and appreciate you a lot for it.”

i go in for a hug, “matt i love you so much! you’re gonna make me cry”

he hugs back but doesn’t seem fulfilled

“matt what’s wrong? you seem unfinished?” i ask still embraced in his grasp

“cause that’s not all i want to say. i just don’t know how to say it” he says

suddenly we hear our friends in the other room start the new year countdown

“well you better hurry before the new year begins” i chuckle

“six.. five” we hear from the other room

i stare up as he looks down at me with his mouth agape as he prepares himself

“two.. one-“

“i’m in love with you” he spills

“HAPPY NEW YEAR” i hear from the other room as i stare at him in silence

“this is probably the worst timing but i really couldn’t keep it in anymore. i can’t go into another year feeling regret for every day that i don’t confess to you how i fee-“

i break his monologue with a kiss

“i love too matt” i look up at him with a smile

“are you being serious?” his confused look making me chuckle

“yess matt. of course i do! like you said, i understand you on a deeper level. and i know you understand me just as well. i enjoy every second i spend with you and i love being around you, you always make me feel special. i also kept my feelings tucked in but i love you just as much” i confess

he smiles and places a kiss on my lips while placing both hands on each of my cheeks

“can i be your boyfriend, y/n?” he whispers into my lips as he holds my cheeks with both hands

“i’d love nothing more” i smile up at him

———————————————————————

a/n- hope you guys enjoyed this cute little story

[darlingsaybonvoyage]

Star 1117 (Kim Seungmin x Reader)

(In which Reader finds out a secret Seungmin had been hiding)

Content Warnings : Non-Idol!AU, GN!Reader, Felix is a bad friend (I promise to write him in the fluffiest fic ever next!), misunderstandings, hurt/comfort, happy ending

(Heavily inspired by Star 1117, if you couldn't tell already, but these songs also fit the vibe! I cried a little writing this. I was gonna wait to post, but I'm a bit excited. It's my longest one-shot yet, so I hope you enjoy!)

(also a part in screenshot 10 says Monday, I meant to put Wednesday :'] aaaaaAAAAH-)

(also also don't focus too much on timestamps, the only ones that matter are the lock screen timestamps!)

SS: 16

WC: 646

Seungmin couldn’t help but be constantly checking for your location since he left. He wasn’t sure if you remembered you could see his, and he forgot to let you know that he had been on his way as he had done what he could to get on the earliest flight available, but he let you know he was close once he realized he hadn’t told you his change of plans.

Now he waited at the seats by where he boarded off the plane, checking your location, and feeling his heart sink as midnight neared, but your location still said you were at your apartment. Maybe you had grown angry that he didn’t let you know earlier. You were angry that he didn’t communicate with you, and you were finally fed up. He hadn’t meant to not tell you, things had just been so chaotic that he honestly forgot. Though, it seemed like this mistake was gonna be the straw on the camel’s back. You weren’t moving from your location, and you weren’t answering your phone. Tears sprung to his eyes as he saw that the clock now read 23:59. He’d begun to lose hope that you’d show up. Resigned, he put his phone away and stood from his seat, ready to go outside to look for a taxi when he heard your voice call for him, and he thought he was going insane. He paused for a moment, when he heard you again, clear as day.

“SEUNGMIN!”

His head whipped in your direction, eyes widening as he saw you through the crowd. You, who suffered crippling social anxiety, doing your best to run through everyone to get to him. He started running to you without realizing it, calling out your name. It seemed as if people realized what was happening, and they started making space. Neither of you stopped until you crashed into each other’s embraces, arms wrapped around one another in the middle of the airport. No one said anything as you two breathed heavily. You were the first to pull back to get a good look at him. You saw the tears. The way his eyes held so many emotions, but love seemed to shine through the strongest. 

“You idiot.” You croaked, your own voice hoarse after having cried the closer you got. “Why did you wait to tell me you were almost here?” Seungmin let out a wet chuckle, wiping at his face. “I genuinely forgot. I haven’t slept in days.” He admitted. You could tell he was being honest, the bags under his eyes being a dead giveaway. You placed your hands over his cheeks and wiped at his falling tears. “I think I made it just in time.” You said as the crowd surrounding you began to countdown from ten, and Seungmin let out a sigh of relief. “I’m glad.” He leaned in close to your face, lips hovering just above your own. 

“I promise to be the best version of myself from now on. I almost lost you, and I won’t let that happen again.” He whispered, his breath warming your skin.

“I promise to never let you go again. Not now, not ever.” You whispered back ever so softly as the countdown neared to midnight.

“Three!”

“Two!”

Your lips locked in a kiss that was full of longing, and was equally tender and passionate.

“One!”

Happy shouts and cries welcoming the new year surrounded you both as you simply shared a kiss, one full of promises to be better. To be kind to each other. To love each other as long as time allows it.

You both pulled away from the kiss, now admiring each other in the middle of the happy chaos surrounding the two of you. You couldn’t have asked for a better way to start the new year.

Nothing would keep you apart ever again.

(If you've read this far, thank you for reading. I hope you have a wonderful 2025. Let's make this year the best one yet!)

[the-universal-sun]

In the spirit of the holiday (NYE, Any other cultural tradition), how do little Ford and Stan handle NYE? Do they have any traditions from their childhood they've rekindled? Or start a brand new one? An example I know of being, some people eat black eyed peas on NYE. So I wondered about your ideas/hcs that these two may have during this time! (And if you get to this long after these have past, that is 100% okay. No rush, no pressure :)!)

Sorry if this is a lot! I kind of split it between general new years stuff, little stan, and little ford stuff. But thank you so much for your ask! I know you said I could take my time, but I had so many ideas I had to get them out. Don’t worry, I’m working on the asks from December, I’ve not forgotten about you lovely people!!!

But I loved this ask! I had to look up some new years stuff because my family and I don’t particularly celebrate, and it was fun reading about all the different traditions people have!

I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!!!!

As always I’m open to helpful comments and critiques!

-_-_ -_-_ -_-_ -_-_ -_-_ -_-_ -_-_ -_-_ -_-_ -_-_ -_-_ -_-

-They didn't care about NYE celebrations for 40 years, why celebrate alone or in another dimension? They didn't see a point to it until they were reunited and their relationship fixed. Now, they celebrate New Years not so much for the passing into a new age, but they celebrate being together for another year, of another year being twins again

-They do have a small party at the Shack for New Years, nothing big, just Fidds and Tate (who leave early) Soos, Wendy, Melody, the Twins, and the two of them (Gompers and Waddles too)

-If they're both big, they will indulge in some champagne when the clock strikes down, but only one glass as a celebration, neither caring for the taste

-They'll do Karaoke before the countdown- at Mabel and Soos' insistence, but both Stan and Ford have a blast singing the certified Old People songs they grew up on

-They didn't really do much to celebrate NYE growing up, so they'll basically do anything Mabel suggests will be a fun way to celebrate, smashing plates and making resolutions to name a few

-Taking a page out of their Mom's handbook, Stan will insist they eat Lentils on New Years for good luck, which Ford will refute as unscientific and therefore he shouldn't have to eat any. It's totally not because he hates Lentils

-If one twin is regressed during NYE, then the other will be their caregiver, knowing how loud and how high the energy will be during the festivities, it would be chaotic and stressful, for both of them, with Stan and Ford regressed together

-Both Stan and Ford, if they're regressed, will wear noise cancelling headphones to block out the sounds of the fireworks going off in town. Neither can stand loud noises, Little Stan's afraid of them and they remind Little Ford too much of his fights during his 30 years of travels

-They both love the lights the fireworks give off, so they'll stand by a window or on the porch with the headphones on and just watch the lights explode at a distance

-If Stan's regressed:

-Little Lee will insist on eating the 12 grapes under the table at midnight, Mabel told him that it's a tasty way to bring in luck for the new year, and Lee's not taking any chances

-Ford has the make him slow down eating the grapes, afraid he'll choke if he eat them too fast

-Poindexter and Shanklin 2 get hate made specially by Lee and Mabel, so they don't get left out of the fun times. The hats are shiny and glitter-laden, perfect hats for ringing in the New Year

-He doesn't sing during Karaoke, but he's clapping along and cheering for everyone that is

-Ford does give him a corner in the living room away from all the energy going on to give him some quiet time, Lee can get overstimulated so easily, so this little corner is a place where he can get away from the noise and excitement but Ford can still keep an eye on him

-He has some coloring books and crayons, a few blocks, and some noise-canceling headphones if the party gets too loud for his quiet corner

-Dipper joins him a couple of times when everywhere is too loud, silently stacking blocks and watching Lee knock them down gently

-He's allowed more sweets than he usually is, but even with Ford keeping an eye on him, Lee somehow eats an entire plate of Mabel's New Years cookies and manages to get one of the twins to supply him with severals cans-with straws-of Pitt Cola

-He's running around and stumbling into furniture. He earns some ouchies which he tearily begs Ford to kiss better

-Of course Ford kisses his Little Lee's bruises and scrapes

-He passes out right as the ball drops, dropping from his sugar high and exhausted from staying up hours past his bedtime

-Ford takes several pictures of Stan passed out and curled up on the couch, dressed in a warm dinosaur patterned onesie-the hood pulled up over his head-clutching his stuffies and snoring away, cookies crumbs and drool and spilling out the side of his mouth

-He hangs it up in the hallways the next stay, much to a rather grumpy and Big Stan's annoyance

-If Ford's little:

-He's dressing up Dr Mittens, not in a party hat, but in some smart and formal little dress ware, a suit and vest to match his own-Stan made the little suit-they have to look sharp for the celebrations and all

-He keeps his noise-canceling headphones on around his neck all night, pulling them up when things get too loud and hiding behind Stan or under his arm if things get to be too much

-He's begging and pleading with Stan to not eat the Good Luck Lentils he made, he finds lentils to be so yucky and gross on his tongue. The good luck isn't worth it

-Stan lets him get out of the lentils but ONLY if he eats grapes at midnight. Ford agrees, but only if he can sit at the table and eat them slowly

-Stan gets him a new fun bag of jelly beans as a little treat, but he can only eat one of every flavor, which is still around 20 flavors, so much more than Little Sixer would normally be allowed to have, but it's the holidays

-Stan does count out the jelly beans and then immediately goes and locks the bag in his room, he's not risking Ford sneaking and eating more and getting a stomach ache

-It's hard to stand firm on that, Sixer's puppy dog eyes and his little "Pwease, Buddy?" drives a stake through Stan's heart, but he stand firm and gives his brother some cookies shaped in the new year and a slice of some sort of almond cake Melody made

-It's the same as his jelly beans, but Ford's sweet tooth demands he eats it all

-He sings a song or two with Mabel during karaoke, she picks the Sid the Science Kid theme song and a BABBA song for them to sing. Ford tried to act embarrassed, but Stan knows his Little Buddy loves that show

-Stan finds the animation creepy, but who is he to judge

-Ford insists on getting in his pajamas and taking a nap a few hours before the countdown, he wants to be well rested enough to witness the ball drop. Stan helps him get dressed in some warm pajamas-space themed of course-and gets Dr Mittens changed into his regular clothes, too. They settle down in Ford's little napping tent and Stan reads a few chapters of a book-right now it's "A Boy Named Bat"-Ford's out by chapter two

-Stan promised his Buddy that he'd wake him in time to see the ball drop, and he does. Ford's grumpy from his nap being interrupted, but he's so excited to see the NYE ball that he forgets all about it. He's jumping and waving his hands excitedly, counting down loudly with everybody

-When the ball drops he's practically shaking Stan and pointing at it, chattering loudly in his ears, and at Mabel's suggestion, presses a slobbery kiss to Stan's cheek to ring in the New Year

-Even Stan can't pretend to be grumpy about that, his smile was caught in the picture Dipper took of the moment