#i havent read this but i must at some point because this art is SO FUCKING GOOOOD

[thekuraning]

Fic ask

4, 13, 20!

HELLO MY FAVORITE PROFESSOR ELM STAN THANK U FOR THE MEMES!!! hey actually these are all ones i havent thought about so made me put on my THINKIN CAP. and hey actually actually this got really long really fast so im PUTTING IT UNDER A READ MORE!!!

4. a story idea you haven't written yet

Ok so like. I've got these two ideas kicking around in my head from time to time that I'm like. Still kind of workshopping. One is a fanfic and one is an original fic. But basically I've had in my head since forever (10 years of Big Thinking) about a big Digimon sort of odyssey that originally started as a Pokemon x Digimon crossover where I took the Rocket executives and shoved them into the digital world. I have a whole world built for it already and a central sort of issue/theme revolving around a power struggle between the Demon Lords and the Royal Knights. The Royal Knights control HUB City, which is the major settlement in the continent, the Demon Lords control the Dark Lands, and kind of like usual they all want to wipe each other out. There's eventually a viral sort of glitch that starts to deteriorate the digital world and jumps to the real world.

Part of my problem is I've wanted to make it a comic or at the very least an illustrated fic and part of the problem is I'm trying to decide if I want to keep it as a crossover or just slap some new names onto the execs bc i gotta be real, the pokemon world and other pokemon characters. do not feature. at all.

its really just an excuse for me to give petrel a digimon.

anyways they all have full evolution lines planned, i've got a few major story beats, plot points, and the major final twist decided on. i also have 5 amvs that i play in my head on a loop when i drive to and from work.

also in this fic some digimon are gay (stingmon and flamedramon makeout sessions when) and trans (crusadermon, trans queen) ive decided

i think ive posted old art before extending the au to some characters and for my perfworld mutuals if youve seen my sycamore + dukemon art before that specific dukemon is also from this au. ive also got a fic i did publish where i workshopped a little bit of HUB city & a few side characters

i am now realizing i meant to also talk about the original fic i have planned and that one is a short story about a serial killer who murders hitchhikers picking up a hitchhiking serial killer and that one is less planned out but i know they sloppy kiss in the end

13. a fandom you're thinking about writing for

so like besides pokemon and tiger & bunny & digimon there's none i actively have fic ideas for, but some fandoms I think I'd like to revisit are Sonic and Zelda. Actually I had a Zelda fic I abandoned back on FFNet that I'd like to take another crack at one day where the premise was it was a modern setting based on the OOT/TP Hyrule (mostly OOT) where magic and fairies and such are regarded as superstition sort of the same way they are now, and the wondrous races (Goron, Zora, Kokiri/Korok, etc. even the Sheika to some extent) had all died out, leaving pretty much just the human races like Hylian, Terminian, Gerudo, etc. (In this case Termina is legitimately a neighboring kingdom/country and not limbo/purgatory ok??) And the kicker was Link was like. a hardcore atheist. but i think i remember people getting mad at me bc i made his legal name "Mahas" which I MUST IMPLORE YOU. THIS IS CANONICALLY HIS NAME AS OF SKYWARD SWORD. BELIEVE IT OR NOT THERE WAS AN ATTEMPT TO BUILD A PSEUDO LANGUAGE IN SKYWARD SWORD. WE KNOW HIS NAME IS MAHAS BECAUSE IN THE BEGINNING WHEN FI IS JUST CALLING HIM LINK AND NOT MASTER LINK HER VOICE LINES ARE EVER ONLY MAHAS. ONCE SHE BEGINS CALLING HIM MASTER LINK ANY TIME IT APPEARS ON SCREEN SHE SAYS "MAARI MAHAS." SO IM RIGHT OK FUCK OFF IM RIGHT. DIE MAD FFNET. DIE. MAD.

ahem.

im normal now.

anyways yeah i'd like to write for elder scrolls again too i think but like. something more original than the supernatural/TESIV Oblivion retelling crossover i tried once.

You can find that one on my ao3 but im not linking it.

20. in what year did you publish your first fic?

In the year of our lord 2005 (pensive emoji)(raised fist emoji) I published a... fic of some kind to FFNet.

You won't find it anymore, I deleted it a long time ago! I'm not sure if it was 'Rocket Road Trip' or 'The Rebellion,' but it was one of those. I used to write a ton of OC team rocket fics, and this was back in the day when the Rocket Executives had no name so you either thought there was 1 guy exec and 1 girl exec or you thought each exec encounter in GSC was a different person, and that was me. So I gave them all names and threw them into a truck together and i think in the very first chapter they were leaving the Team Rocket HQ and they ran over and left to die the OC who would later go on to be repurposed into Proton except his name was Steve then and he was a special classification of trainer class that I called a "Random Rocket," and the thing about Random Rockets was they all had very generic names (Steve, Bob, Juan, I think there was a Nancy once but she never got to show up in a fic or rp?) but the OTHER thing about Random Rockets was no one knew what they looked like because canonically their faces were all censored with a big ass mosaic effect (this was written, not draw.)

anyways farla cussed me out on 3 or 4 different fics back when she used to cuss out literal children so I deleted all my fics from 2005 - 2008 and then I deleted more of them when I went to college.

don't be like farla.

edit: self-plugging my old FFNet account for the lulz. yes it is i, the original author of Slowpoke Tails and Koffing Fumes.

[shkika]

Having trouble with thinking of something to ask hrmm

What part of the rw lore do you find most interesting? Like..what are your thoughts on it? any twists you've thought up or any detail/s you just wanna rant abt?

The rainworld lore is painfully a lot and painfully little at the same time, like why are the pearls focused on garbage worms and what is noise milking oh my goddd

moon isnt lore on her own but her pearl readings are a massive source of it. so if i had to say my favorite thing would be iterators and the relationship they had with their colonies. the fact they can vary and the fact iterators have different opinions of their parents!! (one iterator talked abt havjng to sit through dark political times awkwardly like 🧍🤷 at some points. thats funny)

ahem I looove it a lot!! for example the way moon worded her existence is sad. the way she speaks about them is sad. like in short “ancients must not try very hard so we do that for them. at least i did” <- smth along the lines

she sounds bitter she dislikes them with a hidden passion even when she has 5 braincells left. Not to mention she calls them parasites with bad takes (sheesh). something people dont really ?? recognize enough or at all imo is that moon almost retired (ancients moving away from her city) and she was happy about it. Until it didnt work out and some stayed and she was pissed again.

now pebbles speaks with softness (as much as he has it in him) he liked them! he liked their art! their music! he liked witnessing their stupid arguments even when they were in his name (he found the citadel he shaded funny for being so angry)

he found a lot of things they did stupid but he also was impressed in other aspects! he liked them a lot to the point the last item that he keeps for comfort and keeps him together as a whole is a hymn of theirs. even when abandoned, he finds comfort in the company they used to bring him!!! how sad!!

Another part of the lore. Hm cycles.

I have no idea how they work. Youd believe at first that when you die. You get reborn. Pain!!! never escaping!!

But that cant be the case it has sooo many plotholes if thats the case.

1 artificers kids died! straight up GONE. theyre dead!! thats why shes so insane you cant tell me theyre just lost somewhere and also pups cant ascend (me when i reach spiritual enlightenment at 10). theyre straight up gone.

2. imagine u defeat the scav kind and he comes back an hour later.. nah. thjngs DIE

3 why did the ancients go crazy over killing themselves then idk!

4 suns was basically crying about how they dont know what theyll do if spearmaster dies. yeah no respawning then.

So then the cycle is being reborn into smth new. great. how does karma play in this. how do you raise it. time? do you have your old memories after u go into a new cycle?? i dont know!! no scug has ever been plagued with dreams of being smth else before. !!! how do you confirm its a thing!! idk!! how do you know you are in a samsara! i wish we got ancients talking about it. in pearls or smth.

i havent ascended with saint yet. (reached karma 10 and bonked the siblings) but i doubt they answer all of my questions

random kiki rw lore fact- did you know that the rot area - (riv gameplay) there is a room in it thats just called terror!!! it upsets me greatly. the place is so different because the rot literally eats his walls. it fucks me up sometimes even if it seems obvious

[lightfulonion]

top 5 serirei moments go

This is a great ask because i really dont have an answer ready jkhskda

Ok! These are my top five serirei moments! I have taken into account the anime, the hot springs OVA, the manga moments that didnt make it into the anime or that havent aired yet*, the official art which probably isnt canon but i cant NOT include them, the fanbook and the omake that i have read ...

*i am an anime-only but i read spoilers so i have only approximate knowledge of whats going on manga-wise lol i havent read everything tho so my opinion is not as well-rounded as id like yet but i made an attempt with what i know thus far (which is enough tbh). i have spoiler warnings wherever i deem necessary but please tell me if i need to add something!! what i included from the mp100 fanbook doesnt contain any spoilers, most of them are related to what we've seen from season 3

Anyway here we go!!!

5.

JK JK JAKSJAKKKALDKJALSJD

I am obviously not counting that since it technically ISNT a serirei moment because Seri isnt present. Obviously. That's the reason.

For real now:

5.

Reigen seeing Serizawa for the first time is a moment ingrained in me because the very first thing that Seri did was protect him using his umbrella aka his only source of comfort and security???? while he went against the one person who he thought understood him??? i dont know if it was meant to be read as an exchange of sorts or as a metaphor or as foreshadowing or all three but it's so incredible..

(spoilers, probably? --->) i think in the manga at some point Serizawa got an umbrella and it was clear instead of white or any other color, so when he was using it he was visible and so many fans were saying that this is a metaphor for him not being afraid anymore and standing on his own two feet as a person :'( anyway this is sort of irrelevant but it's kinda related to Reigen too (i think the umbrella was a gift from him??) And the fact that in the anime he uses the cards Reigen gave him as a weapon opposed to the umbrella Touichirou gave him....... (<----end of spoilers)

Also this tweet seems relevant and lives rent free in my mind

4. from the mp100 fanbook

the farting chair..... i cant like a pairing without them being absolutely ridiculous. Reigen doing whatever ridiculous thing he's doing and Serizawa being either "hm. sure." or "??????" is so funny to me. them going to the bar and getting drunk together and Reigen showing him a trick with Seri responding "i have a test tomorrow Reigen-san.." in contrast to what we've seen in the anime so far with Reigen being dramatic and actually impressing Serizawa is so good....... what do you mean this is more than one moment.......

3. (from s3e9)

this and the way they framed Reigen's wait-youve-never-liked-a-girl meltdown and then moments later showing him googling "how to ask girls out" must be an indicator for something (🤨🏳️‍🌈⁉)..... Also the way Reigen lets himself be a little vulnerable in front of Serizawa shows that he trusts him and that's weird since he is so guarded all the time while trying to show how great he is.. I like that he has someone he can share things with and maybe even be himself with

(the above are from this video)

2. the famous moment they cut-off from the anime (specifically from s3e9) (after no3 chronologically)

when i first saw this i was so sure there was something going on canonically that will slowly unravel. i have only seen bits and pieces of the manga but i still feel there is something here. its a small moment and then it changes scene back to mob. considering this being a little later from no3 it makes you wonder if its building up to something or not?? (the answer is its not but still. behind the scenes maybe?) Moreover Reigen's desire to be a good partner makes me??? I cannot explain correctly what this makes me feel because writing this made me both want to cry AND want to make that one meme with timmy's dad (since it couldn't make it into the anime)

1.?????

whatever??? this is???

I first saw this a year or something ago and it still mystifies me to this day... what was the purpose of this? what is trying to convey?? is this supposed to attract the male-loving fans of mp100??? i literally cant NOT read this as gay... it makes me lose my mind every time i look at it. They are literally gay married... (spoilers----->) they even co-own spirits and such at the end of the manga as far as im aware........ (<------ end of spoilers)

there is no way these guys are heterosexual, i think i drove my point home

There are so many things i like about their dynamic and canon didnt show us as many things as i wish it did (how reigen employed serizawa, what happened when they went for drinks and ended up both drunk etc etc) I love them both and I'm glad that they got to meet and work together in the manga and i got to read about it!!

THANKS SO MUCH FOR THE ASK!!! <3 <3 <3 <3

[oleandy]

@4lph4kidz​ asked, and so i must oblige because i LOVE talking

alright, this is going into silly cringe era of andy homestuck skaiagalaxy oleandy’s life (some inside jokes with friends, my old deviantart user was skaiagalaxy hahah)

obviously, this will go under a readmore, it’s long, verbose to the point of obnoxiousness, and also somewhat personal! but nothing im not willing to discuss

stances, alright we’re ready? okay

hi, i’m andy oleandy and i shipped only rosemary and dirkjune for [checks notes] like 5-6 years.

2014 was a COMPLETELY different era from now, crackships sproinging up everywhere, and shit was a lot more free reign (more to the detriment honestly, but thats not today’s topic)

and due to a very silly, very typical of the era seven minutes in heaven rp i did with a (now ex) friend, i got into shipping it. because why not? it was different, and new and i related to june so much! rn i’m roughly 13-14, right on the peak of realizing i am not a cis woman. so i latched onto june, mega hard. she was a different protagonist! she obviously had her prickles, and she wasn’t always nice, but she still was kind- and had a good heart.

i roleplayed her for a very long time, mostly on sites like roblox.

hey! that’s me! on the now defunct EB: hey karkat! game. really good, had lots of fun there

and then i read strider home for ghostly rejects (a fic about june waking up after a possession and suddenly having the powers of a medium- with dirk being to put it simply, a ghostbuster), and that absolutely latched into a mind, same with a cup of mint tea (fantasy, centaur fic. i’m not sure if i’d recommend it now since i havent read it in a while, so i might have nostalgia lense).

here’s some dave art from the fic actually.

nice to see how much i’ve improved!

but back to the ship

i spent a LOT of time thinking about it, as homestuck goes on (i was SO excited for them to meet, and subsequently heartbroken by their single interaction. such is life lol)

and then in 2016 the credits come

and i was right, june is lost and horribly depressed (same hat. 2016 was a tumultuous year for me- and that'll be for another post). i Immediately project my feelings of being a repressed gay person (and also being a repressed trans person.)

i like to think dirk and june helped fix each other, so even now i kinda. keep some of that in my canon perception- well. they don’t “fix” each other, but friendship is friendship and sometimes i find the thought of them being exes as june realizes she’s a woman nice.

sometimes i make it dramatic, sometimes funny, and often times they simply parted ways cuz it couldn’t work anymore

(obv it still becomes somewhat dramatic on dirk’s side, because he is dirk strider)

i dont really have anything left for this post but id love to continue to talk about it! it’s fun

[ikusayu-no-hana]

kiden!! act i

first off. I watched kiden with the most kasen-biased lens, and even after like 6ish rewatches there are things I might have missed out. second, this is long. hehe. so that's a much needed disclaimer before I unload everything I've been thinking of for the past few weeks.

ofc......this is an abandoned timeline. even so, the only flowers that bloom are those near gracia.

Kokin’s shriek thank you very very very much

they skip half of the plotline of iden and straight away make it clear that everyone knows who the touken danshi are . and the fact that they know they are living in an abandoned timeline. no existential conflicts here?

takayama ukon, I think, as far as I can remember, is the first sute human ive seen that justifies not killing the touken danshi on the basis that they have the same hearts as humans, and are not mere objects. He’s so emptathetic towards them it almost makes me uncomfortable bc well….we know whats going to happen in the end .

jizou running away with gracia is the softest portrayal of a touken danshi denying his duty we’ve ever seen. maybe its the hand holding, treating gracia like she’s fragile.

Urghrjdnf I know it’s a world that came into existence from gracia’s wish but hearing don francisco say “what if we let her be free?” leaves a bad bad taste in my mouth. Sure it may be what she wanted but does she anymore? Isn’t she already supposed to be free in this new world? But then again, would her happiness ultimately lie in her husband living like a depraved madman…..? debatable.

i feel terrible for the honmaru that lost their daisanbutai...all six swords broken in one investigation....*logs in to my honmaru to poke all six of them to make sure theyre ok*

Kokin’s message…

Always always alwaysssssss mouthing the opening dialogue…fuck ive been waiting to hear it in kasens voice forever and ever.

why is kasen so beautiful. like. they really set his wig and did his makeup to make him look divine, like one of those sad noh maidens (thoughts on the op here)

(A bit of an aside, but I find it funny how some of them still have flower petals on their costumes www. Chougi looking fully serious while having a petal lodged in his cape as if just seconds earlier he wasnt dancing. and shishiou scattering petals in his wake as he runs.)

SITTING AROUND A FIRE HOW CUTE. i forgot that this scene in almost its entirety was also in kahakugeki, because this time it’s a completely different setting and theyre doing something other than walking. this feels more lively :)

they discuss a little poetry! specifically the poem kokindenjunotachi recites in the incoming call. kidengumi poetry discussion session in full swing! i still am surprised to find out shishiou also liked poetry bc his former master was an accomplished poet, and also that chougi and nikkari are well-read in old literature. I wonder if that was their own acquired knowledge or from kasen's influence.

feels like everyone has an appreciation (or at least, an understanding) of the arts that kasen likes ("please group me with people who understand elegance").

kasen voice: in most cases the 'uta' you're talking about is not the 'uta' I'm familiar with! (he mustve heard a lot of kotegiri's songs already.)

kikkou truly must be a good cook if kasen is relishing the food he made........mmmm watching them made me a little hungry ngl

who's the sender of the message??? does kasen know????

"well I do have a feeling of who it might be–"

"one of your old friends, perhaps?"

I love how kasen and nikkari have this exchange between them, where nikkari consistently sees right through kasen and his discomfort and frankly cuts right to the point. nikkari’s role here is to act as a foil of sorts to kasen.

I feel like. kotegiri and shishiou bring the much needed light-heartedness to this unit. tsurumaru, koga, mutsu and horikawa did that in iden but in kiden we’ve got like. more somber characters havent we. like seriously in any other setting I wouldnt imagine characters like kasen and nikkari doing an enthusiastic group shout . (kikkou looks at chougi bc hes the only one not doing it lol. and i think nikkari also gestures to chougi to go along w it

so the farmers mention that katō kiyomasa was defeated and bc of that the christians made kumamoto-jo their hideout. looked him up and....this guy was absolutely brutal towards them....stabbing pregnant christian women and cutting off their children's heads. making kumamoto castle a christian place feels like the ultimate fuck you to kato kiyomasa.

seeing kasen give out instructions feels so..........and everyone looking at him. thats his unit. thats his daisanbutai. thats their captain. and hes such a trustworthy captain <3

the reason why nikkari’s so set on poking kasen about his ‘mukashinajimi’ is definitely bc kasen is mysteriously reluctant about to bring it up (shinpaishite iru yo). in kahakugeki kasen begins to say kokindenjunotachi’s name in the first scene when nikkari cuts in and i wish theyd have kept that little bit in kiden. i think kasen......definitely didnt want to face his past. ive said enough abt that in well...a lot of posts. but also, i think he was also a little fearfulof what meeting old friends would mean. itd be too many coincidences, wouldnt it

it just occurred to me that tadaoki, most definitely, like in giden, thought kasen was a geisha just standing in the middle of his way. just like that. thats why hes like ???????????

oh man. kasen. it mustve fucked him up to see tadaoki like that. i feel like having watched kahakugeki took a little shock out of it bc we all expected it, but it really mustve been a massive shocker and eye opener to kasen to see what a fully christian country entailed. (if gracias wish hadnt come true tadaoki wouldnt have to suffer like this would he...? but then neither wouldve been able to make the other happy if their repsective wishes came true) its jarring to see your father, who was once full of pride and one of the wealthiest lords in the country, fall to the bottom of the barrel.

obsessed with the way kasen shows his nervous tics: tucking his hair, tapping his sword, flourishing his cape. kuma does it all so naturally.

???? chougi smile out of nowhere???? i think he only did that in daisenshuuraku stream bc in 4/3 stream he didnt much smile at kikkou kjsndv thank you for that though

chougi and kikkou r literally . team rocket but more cunning and scheming. its like theyve already had experience in reconnaissance together.

if im not wrong kikkou says “even though it’s god’s country, there’s no equality among its citizens” yes king thats been the problem w christian kingdoms throughout history! *cough* europe *cough*

"bluffing is also a weapon of war" go kikkou go!!!!!!!!

i wouldnt want them as enemies ever theyre genuinely terrifyingly good at drawing out information. but also theyre just bluffing it as they go huh lol

still, its impressive they came up with all that on the spot.

DEATH BY KIKKOUS WHISTLE

jk rowling wishes she couldve made draco malfunction as sexy and ruthless as chougi

MAN THEYRE SO ANNOYING D SJKNDV everyone whispering "hidari! hidari!!!!!!" but he still gets slapped. imagine ur just here to protect ur religious country and these meddling touken danshi LIE to ur face and give u weird riddles to solve and u still get clocked while the other guy is having the time of his life whistling at ur misfortune. and the blue cape guy tops it off with “i have utmost respect for ur guys’ devotion to ur faith :)”

theyre so good. chemistry is out of this world. digging my grave as i speak

“where is she?!?!?!?!?” *stomach suddenly starts rumbling* sorry i know its like. a plot point to get tadaoki to where shishiou and kotegiri at the eatery but i couldnt stop laughing

i think its safe to say kiden part i is more of a comedy to a certain extent. to a certain extent only though.

kotegiri is so earnest and it feels like shishiou is his elder brother.

they finally got to sit at the same table T-T

i really like how the three sets of touken danshi move to different places to gather intel; kasen + nikkari going to the crowds near the castle to observe them (i loved the bgm here), chougi + kikkou slyly making their way to the church, shishiou + kote going to a restaurant. it feels characteristic to each of them.

that one guy inthe background doing a double take @ nue

shishiou talks to kogarasumaru a lot for a guy who claims to not like being treated like a kid hmmmmmmm admit u like being spoiled like the rest of us

also i wonder if shishiou simply didnt ask kogarasumaru for an explanation or if kogarasumaru didnt go into too many details or if shishiou simply forgot about what the former meant by a ‘troublesome’ mission. he may be a himbo

nveeeveerrrrrr getting tired of shishious koga impression. ever

and his smile while talking about his jicchan....... :D

shishious the kind of friend that has No Shame and No Reluctance to be full on weird in public settings and honestly good for him ! (kotegiri nodding to the other people in the restaurant wwww like yeah excuse us, im sorry)

shishiou knows archery confirmed.

he’s the first one to sense that the ‘humans’ arent actually humans. its his innate sense isnt it? he’s more knowledgeable than he lets everyone else in on.

i love how theyre all told gracia was taken by a touken danshi but they dont suspect the other members

honestly i dont want to delve too much into the historical figures bc that would make this post longer than i think its goign to turn out :(

kotegiri’s wavering confusion at the sight of tadaoki........i love how touken danshi retain their former master’s bonds and feelings toward the people in their lives. in a rudimentary sort of way kote must have felt like he was looking at his father.

well. can you really blame tadaoki for wanting to kill gracia? actually no this isnt really a story about who bears the blame. if you try to search for moral validity in this play youre going to spend eternity here. its simply a story about desire. in kidens case, gracia gaining something meant making tadaoki lose something, namely his wealth, title, lands, perhaps even sanity. and because of that he hates her. but because of his memories he also loves her. and thats the central conflict of his character.

like ive always thought: in tkrb there is rarely black and white morality, what they define as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ depends upon whether they can carry out their orders and protect history, and thats also apparent in a few later scenes. its the fact that the swords are drawn from so many different stories (+ also the fact that modern morality has no business being applied to the people of yore. also re: the oda swords’ different views on oda nobunaga. hasebe hates the way he did things, but yagen thinks it was fitting for a man of that period) ok ive derailed enough lets go back to the play !

ofc kote follows after tadaoki,,,,,,,,

right before meeting him, a strong wind blows over kasen and nikkari . personally i think that “wind” that notoriously blows in some scenes is a sort of euphemism for kokindenjunotachi -> in the keichou kumamoto chousa in the game he tells us to call him kaze at first. ofc, this is just a speculation but it ties in with later scenes too so bear w me

i love how kokin straight up lies to them ‘i called you so we could recite poems’ kasen is right to see through his bullshit jkdsnvjk. still, i think kokin was sly to have waited until he was sure they were trustworthy and strong enough to handle the mission to formally tell them the details of what happened.

this little exchange between kokin and kasen is my favourite bc it says a lot without many words. its almost like a fight between siblings but not exactly, kokin has this emotional distance that kasen cant get through to. id liken it more to a father-and-son thing. the son never being able to understand his father is such a famous trope isnt it? thats whats happening here. kokin’s got something up his sleeve and kasen is dissatisfied bc he cant guess what it is and why kokin’s keeping it from them.

>ikuzo, aoe. ah, yarou! killed me x2. two of my favourite swords interactignrgksndfjnvdfjnvkjnsd

this bgm slaps

low-level kokin ganbatte

NITOU KAIGAN LETS GOOOOO

ahhh canon that nikkari and kasen spar a lot!!

man kasen is so sarcastic . ‘have you lost your poetic spirit?’ bestie chill he’s doing his best at the level he’s on

NOW kokin trusts them after they rescue him. he suddenly goes all serious and then says those words like theyre coming from his heart.......in this investigation, he specifically asked for kasen didnt he? it wasnt like iden where hizen called for all competent touken danshi. i suppose that was part of his plan as well, to strengthen kasen (we dont get to know if like in iden, the saniwa deliberately also wanted kasen to grow. its simply not mentioned but the mission pays off doesnt it?). what a roundabout way to do it tho. though, kasen wouldve been petulant if he Knew what this investigation was meant to entail right from the start. thats why kokin couldnt fully go into the details right away.

:(((((((((((((((((((((((((((( gracia...........

‘why did that man order my death?’ god this reminds me of musou’s dainibutai’s chapter where kasen just. randomly asks ‘do you think tadaoki wanted gracia......dead?’ its so out of character bc he’s being vulnerable for the first time since the mission, and namazuo tells him ‘it doesnt matter how it happened, if someone precious dies, anyone’d be sad’ (paraphrased from the jp game i didnt play the en version dont tell me im wrong vdbjsndvkjdsfnvkj)

haraiso.......inferno.........they’ve read their dante alighieri

as far as i can make out the touken danshi that perished were......kashuu, yagen, ichigo, nihongou, horikawa, and izumi

AHHHHHHHHHHH jizou’s internal conflict AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

‘just like me, you’re also taken captive’ ah it strikes again, the fixed and unflexible nature of the touken danshi’s duty that is the root cause of all pain in tkrb.

this is so funny and cute awwwwwww. its so hard for jizou to comprehend human relationships. its easy to understand at a superficial level, but hard once you actually are a human. and thats what’s happening here: jizou is getting humanized.

oh jizous so cuteeeeeee

yeeeeee the table scene !!!!!!

i came to the stunning realization that this scene references the scene of The Last Supper. but ofc.......there are supposed to be 13 people in the painting, but ukon and yukinaga and gracia aren’t there. i initially thought gracia would be representative of jesus, but she’s betrayed them and run away right? jesus is the one that stayed and was killed. with that logic, it’s otomo sourin that’s symbolic of jesus since......well........he gets betrayed in the end. this is a table of traitors.

so i looked up what seisan meant and

oh my god it IS EXACTLY THE LAST SUPPER TOUSUTE DID IT DELIBERATELYYYYYYYY

ahhh i really love the proverb kikkou uses here: 郷に って は 郷に したがえ . i didnt get it immediately at first but i did get a sense of it being similar to ‘when in rome, do as the romans do.’ i love this kikkou’s characterization so much

otomo sourin feels like their babysitter rip

theyre so pretty I loved the set-up of this scene

this scene is significant in so many ways 1) we dont have enough scenes in tkrb where touken danshi are subtly given the position of unbending, ruthless, unnegotiable villains. 2) it reiterates what we already know: that protecting history is a touken danshi’s instinct. 3) it makes a distinction between the concepts of ‘instinct’ and ‘justice’ 4) kikkou likes to wave at people 5) chougi is the more passionate one, kikkou the cooler, level-headed one.

yoshitaka says that no one is in the wrong. hmmm

kotegiri’s face as tadaoki is denouncing tama 😭😭😭😭😭😭

  shishiou talking aboutkasen😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

even though he’s a government sword, kokin displays so much human emotion, wanting to save jizou even after they parted ways. it reminds me of kasen when he’s with sayo orz

kasen has this air of resignation as he recites the origin of his name. i feel like shaking him and saying NOOOOOOO cant you see nobody thinks those 36 dead people were your fault?? youre respected and loved just as you are!

‘kasen kanesada, will you kill gracia? you, who was tadaoki’s sword, will you kill the person he loved?’ crying screaming throwing up ripping my curtains apart smashing thw windows tearing out all the pages from my books this line isso bonkers insane . and kokin using kasens full name too

holy fuck kasen has so much of an internal crisis about it its insane.

ofc kokin smiles bc he also Knows that.

ofc kasen bites back w his own questions. thats just how those two are . its like they view human emotions as a sort of weakness, that kasen is inherently weak for not feeling completely sure about killing her, and that kokin is weak and denying his purpose as a touken danshi for wanting to save jizou.

>scene ending with kokin alone, talking to no one in particular (or is he?) wondering if he’s naïve.

>next scene starting with jizou saying ‘kaze ka?’ you see the connection?? The heavenly wind and kokin???? The hecking amatsukaze???????????

God. Isn’t it ironic how jizou prays to his god so that he can preserve gracia’s connection to her god? (note: in kahakugeki he only used one hand for this line, in kiden he uses both)

Hmmm aren’t flowers ephemeral and fragile? I understand where jizou’s coming from, heck my guess for what he’d call her was also a flower, and why kokin calls her a blossom of the Hosokawa, but I cant help but wonder if that’s a way to simply emphasize her weakness and inability to live as she liked, having her life mostly dictated by the men around her. Tadaoki’s the only one who calls her a snake, capable of biting back. The same snake that threw humanity into sin. Ironically enough it’s the person who loved/hated her that could understand her. But then again, its tadaoki’s heart inside jizou that’s also calling her a flower. Honestly she can (and does) symbolize both.

Having no home to return to must hurt…….

Im so happy they can finally fight with real enemies instead of like last time ><

The reason im so glad they paired up Kasen and Nikkari is bc both of them are haunted by the sin of what they killed, and seeing them get along so well, like they know each others intricacies, what the other is thinking, its like a genuine bond.

Ok and now one of the most emotionally charged scenes ever………..

hmmm how to put this simply. it’d be easy to leave it as simply ‘straight married couple argument’ but it begs a more deeper nuance than that. lets see. gracia and tadaoki meet for the first time in what is probably, a long time. all this time tadaoki was so worked about hating her and wanting to kill her and yet his first instinct is to let out all his pent up feelings and.....cling to her........ ‘why did we become this way?’ ..........even though they loved each other and were married for over 20 years, held on even through akechi mitsuhide’s betrayal, tama’s conversion. ….how were they reduced to this? Its precisely because of that bond that gracia asked him to kill her, and precisely because of that bond that tadaoki couldn’t. its so so simple to say what we want to do but when the reality of the situation catches up, can we really stay the same?

and tadaoki’s last words to her were literally ‘my snake’

oughoughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhOUCH rip

and thats her breaking point. shes literally driven to hysterics. and she didnt want to ascertain tadaoki’s heart....she simply wanted to be forgiven (the reasons that cut the deepest are the most simplest ones) for the sin of hating the person she loved.

but,,,,,,,as much as i loved thisscene, as much as i couldnt bear to watch it in consequent rewatches,,,,,this gracia isnt the real gracia.....she just isnt. the humans in altered timelines never are.

‘let’s go, aneue’ ‘where?’ ‘anywhere. maybe even to hell’ <- wtf twfffffffffsdjnfffffffffffffffffff jizou said GOODBYE TO KARMA AND MORALITY I’D FOLLOW MY BELOVED ANYWHERE

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭tadadsifkofjkasensdnfkasjfnkjnsakjfnajnfajsnjcksanfwehfiuhwenudnjfuwfnzsexdrctfvgybhnjkmgbhjnk YOURE GOING TO DIE IN YOUR BEST FRIEND’S ARMS AND YOU PLAY ALONG BECAUSE ITS WRITTEN DOWN YOUVE MEMORIZED IT ITS ALL YOU KNOW 😭😭😭😭😭😭 

tadaoki’s honshin was that he didnt want to kill gracia and jizou and kasen inherited that same heart are you listening!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!111!1111!!!!!!!!!!!!

it physically hurts to see kasen so very nearly crying . its like everytime he meets tadaoki he’s left perplexed and dissatisfied  and so so upset and he doesnt know what to do with all these feelings

ending with all the revisionists so far......ito, ryoma, takeuchi, toyou, those two from tenden/muden, the black armour, oboro manba.......kuroda kanbei.......who’s absolutely digging that long hair............

[ashleyetc]

Doesn’t it seem like a slippery slope to you to say that bad artists can make good art? If we say the art is good, then we are giving a passive endorsement to people who want to experience it. For example, if we condemn a racist but still laude aspects of their work, if we still stock their work in bookstores and libraries, and make it publicly available to anyone but experts on anti-racism, we are only ensuring that more and more poc will be harmed by exposure year after year, giving evil authors a way to victimize their chosen targets even from beyond the grave

not entirely sure what prompted this? but ultimately i kinda think no. like, partly because you cant simply eliminate all art from general public consciousness that was made by bad people- imagine trying to get everyone to forget r kelly exists, or writing a history of opera that excludes wagner while still being coherent, etc. i dont think censorship in the manner you seem to be suggesting is like, plausible, in the internet age, and i think its ethically dubious at best. i am an anarchist, and by this i mean that i am against all authority, and the idea of a specific group of people who get to decide what is Good and gets to stay and what is Bad and must be purged makes me shudder, regardless of any stated noble intention.

i think part of the problem too is you are viewing all art by bad people as targeted and malicious. this is definitely true in some cases, lovecraft's work isnt subtle for the obvious example(thats a little unfair to him but im fine with being unfair to the man), but i think a lot of bigoted art simply isnt intended to 'victimize a chosen target' as you put it. cat's cradle by vonnegut is an incredibly racist book, but i dont think thats due to malice as much as kurt being an ignorant white guy writing fiction in the 50s. i dont say that to excuse it, to be clear, but im mostly pointing out that the book doesnt exist as a racist diatribe (i would also point out that his later novel hocus pocus is pretty definitively antiracist- would that make a difference in your calculus?). the racism isnt the point, in other words (again not saying it doesnt matter).

i think a lot of artists who are awful people simply dont make art about that, too- sure, i find it pretty gross to listen to a love song sung by john lennon, but i think its a bonkers take to think anyone who doesnt feel that way is therefore an abuser themself, or endorsing abuse. for a lot of artists the ways in which theyre awful just dont actually show up in their work.

and i definitely think this is like, on a sliding scale, yknow. like, if someone is monetarily supporting an artist who lets say is using their wealth to push back against civil rights for a particular marginalized group they hate, then yeah, that sucks and they should feel bad. and i sure as hell dont wanna hang out with anyone who tells me 'yeah i know he (allegedly but come on) started his own neonazi hate group from prison but burzum is so good.' but like. i cant get too worked up about someone listening to some shitty old dead assholes music, or reading some old books that yeah are pretty racist. i mean, tolkien's shit is racist, in a similarly ignorant fool way to the vonnegut i mentioned, and i would feel ridiculous condemning anyone reading that when its so ingrained into culture.

idk im open to the idea that im wrong but i havent seen much reason to believe it and i dont think this line of thinking is helpful in the absolute like this, like sure there are important discussions to be had about this stuff, but i dont think youre really looking at it in a particularly useful way.

tldr: nah, its way too complicated for that kind of approach

[sweetcurry]

Seibetsu "Mona Lisa" no Kimi e. (性別「モナリザ」の君へ) - Yoshimura Tsumuji

Genre - Drama, School Life, Romance

Read - volume 2 chapter 9 / volume 6 chapter 29 (7 volumes in the original)

Status - Ongoing

In this world, at the age of 12, children choose their sex. Hinase, on the eve of their 18th birthday, has yet to make a choice, and is still sexless. Regardless, they live a content life with their childhood friends Shiori(boy) and Ritsu(girl). But the "choice" is all Hinase can think about when suddenly both Shiori and Ritsu confess their love to them on the same day and request they become the opposite sex to them so they can have a relationship.

So I havent read most of this yet, I admit. But I have a lot of opinions. I think there could be so much more here in terms of world building and actual nonbinary rep. Like I have a hard time believing that any 12 year old is capable of making this decision independently. Shiori admits he chose to be a boy because that's what his brother did. So would there not just be a bunch of households with children of one gender? Or parental influence, like with Ritsu, she was really good at sports so her parents constantly bought her "boy" things and expected her to be a boy. But sike she actually wanted to be cute and chose to be a girl!

And thats where I have a problem with this. This world, where they author could have done ANYTHING, is still fundamental gendered like ours is and it defeats the point of any of the motivations of the characters. There's such a heavy reliance on gender roles in this (Shiori wanted to be cool like his brother, all the nurses at the hospital are women, Ritsu wanted to be cute so she became a girl) in a story where none of that is supposed to matter until you're 12. And then Hinase is seen as strange and is medically studied and will not live past 20 unless they choose. Also, Shiori's and Ritsu's insistence that Hinase must choose the sex that lets them be in a heterosexual relationship only is just. The author really limited themselves when they could have done anything! Not to mention Hinanse can't understand the romantic love their friends feel for them, which is not a nod to them being asexual, it's implying they are fundamentally wrong.

I don't know. Maybe some of my questions get answered and I just got hasty. But I feel like there could have been so much potential with this one. As a nonbinary person myself, I was excited to see one as a serious main character (albeit a child) where they're not just played as a pretty boy in a dress with the plot never addressing them personally aside from that. I was excited to see a nonbinary person live a normal life. I knew what I was getting into a bit, but the constant beating me over the head with "pick a side" is physically hurting me.

You know, I'm gonna keep reading this. I need the closure.

Overall

5/10

The art is nice.

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom 14-20 thoughts!! I finished up s1 :D these last few eps were actually really really good!!!

-did. did tucker really just say esperanto was a dead language only spoken as a secret code between geeks. google says around 100,000 people actively speak it. oh my god...it being an auxiliary language doesn't mean its 'just for geeks to speak in code' ...it helps bridge gaps between people who don't have a language in common...

-danny really isn't pulling punches when it comes to fighting the ghost-cop possessed people huh. like he SLAMMED KWAN INTO THE CONCRETE SO HARD. HE THREW PAULINA INTO A BILLBOARD. will that...I mean it WOULD carry over to their bodies non-possessed, right? like if the ghost piloting their bodies gets hurt?? itd be so upsetting to be possessed, lose time, then wake up covered in bruises (and possibly, broken bones??) real horror movie stuff im sure wont be addressed in any way

-tuckers parents seem nice! I like them :)

-WULF IS CUTE AND I FEEL BAD. im so glad the gang realized he was only causing trouble bc of the shock collar walker put on him and helped. also, him wearing that big hoodie with the hood on, and thinking its subtle. we can tell youre still a giant wolfie :) THEN GETTING SUCKED INTO THE PORTAL AAAAH :( anxiously waiting to see Him Again....

-DANNY BLASTING HIS PARENTS THINKING THEY WERE OVERSHADOWED LMFAO GET THEIR ASSES. maddie marking how many ghosts she gets with lipstick tallies on the side of her portal gun? kindaaa iconic tho. (ALSO, SHE WAS LIKE, 2 FT AWAY FROM HIM RIGHT AFTER SHE TRIED TO SHOOT HIM. HOW DO YOU NOT RECONINZE YOUR OWN SON??? like sure, he might have diff hair/eye colors. but like, if one of my family members dyed their hair, and was wearing contacts, its not like id be like 'wHO IS THIS STRANGER!!!' ...he still has all his facial features!! same everything!!! I hate it here)

-paulina being #1 girl realizing danny's a friendly ghost immediately. smart queen. lancer and kwan ran away right after he made this sweet baby face at them:

which is hilarious.

-ok. im not saying his bullying is JUSTIFIED, but. dash looked so pleased with the (cute!) poster he just painted, and danny comes thru the wall and spills paint on his nice letterman jacket. his anger is justified maybe 65% of the time so far...(not the way he handles it, but STILL.) at least lancer is stepping in!! and them making a silly little bet was...cute?? until dash pulled out his GROSS UNDERWEAR AND SAID DANNY WOULD HAVE TO EAT THEM???? WHAT THE FUCK MAN. TUCKER WAS SO RIGHT ITS FUCKING WEIRD TO CARRY THOSE AROUND EWWW. THIS KID IS UNWELL. lancer was right, his animatronic setup was SUPER IMPRESSIVE?? hes actually pretty creative. danny meanwhile is stealing the fright knight's design...I hope dash is taking art classes or smth with his sports

-fright knight is the most bestest ghost so far i LOVE THAT DESIGN. I am biased towards knights, and characters with swords, but he fucks so severely. and should sue danny for copyright infringement for stealing his design for his haunted house. if some 14 yr old broke into MY house and stole MY sword, id also be pissed. his evil winged unicorn rules too with its FANGS. and he just CAN SHOVE THE PORTAL OPEN WITH HIS HANDS??? is he the strongest ghost weve seen so far? idk but hes my fav. SOUL SHREDDER IS SUCH A COOL SWORD NAME TOO. ANY NAMED SWORD ALSO FUCKS. 'flaming bedsheets of DEATH' funny king. ALSO he was polite to dash and tucker when just asking for directions and telling tucker 'oh maybe, just a suggestion, maybe be nicer to me and be more respectful :)' I LOOOVE HIM.

-I noticed this in the Ember ep, but jazz has an electric guitar in her room!! talent musical queen!! its cool to see hobbies just in the bg.

-fright knight's murder castle reminds me of the booby trapped murder castle in zexal!! another supposedly 'for kids' show with murder/trap castles! we love that. if you are a dp fan reading this, give yugioh zexal a try. its also got 13-14 year old protags and involves (alien) ghosts. the cardgame is just a vessel for the plot, which is really good. (I just want more people to watch my fav yugioh, man)

-danny. with a SWORD.

-danny doesnt NEED TO WIN this contest, dash didnt STEAL HIS DESIGNS AND STEAL A SWORD. he also got excited to hear lancer got sent to a dimension with his worst fears too just so he could win the contest? DANNY WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!!! BRO MAYBE YOURE 14 AND HAVENT FULLY DEVOLPED YOUR WHOLE BRAIN YET, BUT...THATS FUCKED. this kid casually says the most deranged things, I do worry for my spooky son. once again, therapy needed. that judo toss was great tho. I wonder if he actually did pick up some martial arts stuff from his mom?

-danny can fly 112 mph!!! thats so fast! I love the lil montage of him and his friends testing his abilities and stuff, very cute and a good way to showcase what he can do by now and how much more proficient he's gotten from ep 1!!! I'm sure he's going to get more abilities :)

-im glad...maddie's at least TRYING this ep. I do feel for her because her husband is a man baby. but the fact it took 16 episodes to get a kinda semblance of any kind of real concern or attempts at bonding. hmm. jack's 'BACK OFF SHES A MINOR' @ the ghost trying to attack jazz. also was very funny. and him wanting to make an action figure of her? are the parents redeeming themselves to me? slightly. they gotta Work Harder

-THE GHOST. IS FLYING. THE PLANE.

-fenton machete. but she doesnt carry a PHONE??? ???

-I mean I expected vlad when you namedrop him earlier in the ep, and also the title card picture, and dalv corp being fucking vlad backwards. but seeing him just pull up on a golf cart made me bust out laughing. WITH the gift baskets prepared. why wouldnt you at least be suspicious. also, if he wants danny to be his lil sonboy, why is he so fucking malicious?? dude you are going about this in such a bad way. stop it. get some help.

-maddie not even hesitating to drag danny out. fucking good. danny is so right, go on the internet to date. get a cat. how do you spend...how many years?? has it been since college?? at least 20, right, since the parents/vlad are in their 40s? hung up on ONE girl. my god, man. incel drama queen. her kung fu IS impressive, but dude. 'we both know hes a creep' SO right. it sucks but they do need a phone and shit being in the middle of NOWHERE. also, just stealing his helicopter was great. <3

-'you must be exhausted carrying the weight of that mistake you made years ago' 'well we all make mistakes. maybe I'll make one now!' WHY DID THIS EXHCHANGE SEND ME. AND VLAD WITH THE BREATH SPRAY EWWW BITCH. 'OLD BAIT BREATH' SOO RIGHT. both danny and his mom playing him HAHAH hes so dumb. or rather, I think he thinks with his emotions too too much and is...actually pretty gullible? lmao he believed danny was ready to give in SO fast. (which is sad hes that hopeful, like you have SO MUCH MONEY YOU COULD EASILY GET ANOTHER GIRL WHO HAS A KID. AND WOULD WANT TO BE WITH YOU AND BE SUPPORTED. GET OVER THIS (1) WOMAN ALREADY IM GETTING SECONDHAND EMBARRASSMENT AAAAH)

-GHOST BEAR GHOST BEAR GHOST BEAR. it was also in the title card, but I still got very excited. we love bears here

-SAM'S BAT SWIMSUIT COVERUP!!! her outfits are simply iconic.

-'i'd tell you to go to the mens room, but I don't think you qualify' top paulina transphobic moments. :( and him wearing a tanktop to the swim park? hmmm! (actually I think she was overshadowed by then, so, KITTY top 10 transphobic moments??)

-kitty just piloting paulina around makes me feel SO bad tho, paulina's gonna wake up and be like 'wtf do you mean I was dating this rando' like youre leading danny on to make johnny jealous, and also just POSSESSING POOR PAULINA. dude take your relationship problems ELSEWHERE. last time we saw them, they seemed like such a cute couple!! wtf johnny!! I mean, she sucks for trying to make him jealous, he sucks for looking at other girls...maybe they need a break, but Not Like This. or, you know, just. better communication...

-and the A-listers having a full packet and a stamp system. who organizes this. kwan fucking owning being the new danny though, this is hysterical. THE TUCKER/KWAN FLOWER FIELD TWIRL. UNIRONICALLY ADORABLE. and him giving it his all for the poetry slam. bless his HEARTTTT.

-Star owns. actually, all of the extra characters are shining this ep and I love it.

-INVISO-BILL??? NOOOO THEY DID HIM SOO DIRTY. DANNY SWEETIE IM SO SORRY.

-johnny and danny bein friends and staging a fake fight (which danny takes too seriously, once again this child has aggression he NEEDS TO WORK OUT) I hope these three stay friends, I said it before but danny needs more friendly ghosts to hang with.

-at this point, Danny's ghost enemies are a lot like, I dunno, batman's rouge gallery is the first thing that comes to mind. they all have their own gimmick and unique designs, but most of them are easy to beat after learning the Moral Lesson. I still get excited when any of them show up again, though. 18 is another valerie episode!!!! :D skulker really said you two will get along if I have to handcuff you together <3 and the gym teacher really said, youre married now, have a flour baby! ngl, I'm not really watching this show for the shipping stuff (which I am very scared to look at the fandom for after I finish this watch through- I feel like there's probably discourse/arguing about ships...) but. I'm gonna put my opinion out there. valerie/danny > sam/danny. maybe I just really love the enemies to lovers trope. And the secret identity stuff adds Extra Flavor.

-SKULKER JUST HAVING THE BOX GHOST AND DANGLING HIM BY A STRING. HILARIOUS. and him watching them with binoculars and making his silly little commentary. AND MAKING THE SACK BABY CRY. LMAO. THIS DUDE IS A BABY KIDNAPPER. skulker is super fun

-danny, you just...collapsed the water tower. and then attacked the nasty burger machine...mascot thingy...out of anger..I KEEP SAYING HE'S GOT ANGER ISSUES BUT. HE REALLY NEEDS A LESSON IN MANAGING COLLATERAL DAMAGE!!! So does valerie!! They're both pretty focused on each other. I mean it's good of Danny to say he's trying to make sure PEOPLE don't get hurt, but... (I mean I guess it's not something 14 year olds WOULD worry about, but as an adult im like, who's going to fix that? how much money will that take??)

-TUCKER MAKING BANK. and sam and tucker being super emotionally attached to their flour baby and being pretty good parents. that's cute...also him just straight kissing her and being like. WAIT. O_O JDSKAFHD. his mom baking them into cookies was the funniest possible result. tbh I dont feel like this is on tucker, if anything the other kid's shouldve been more responsible! He was just taking an opportunity to get that $$ which I respect

-Danny being more understanding of Valerie's situation in the end (helping her at her job, too, and trying to keep that a secret for her!!!) And seeing them work together this ep, and also her letting phantom get her out of the ghost zone...was very sweet. LOVE that. more valerie eps pls

-me when I realize vlad's big stupid house exploded because of his own carelessness with changing the ghost portal ectofiltrator or whatever: *pointing and laughing*

-me when I realize it means he's gonna go make danny's life hell for it somehow: >:(

-SCOOBY PARODY!!! I feel like there's gotta be some scooby doo/danny phantom crossover stuff, right? also, 'guys in white' men in black wishes

-'oh, that's right! dad married the love of your life! you're bitter and alone!' DANNNNNYY GET HIS ASS ONCE AGAIN WE ARE POINTING AND LAUGHING AT VLAD

-'jack, you captured the ghost boy!!' UMM. he did nothing <3 'we have a weapon's vault??' YOU HAVE A WEAPONS VAULT??? and jack didnt put a handle on the inside. of fucking course he didnt! why would you leave that to your son!! or expect him to clean YOUR LAB when its where you work with probably dangerous chemicals and weapons and hes 14!! give him normal chores, like, I dunno, vacuuming, laundry, dishes...CMON. I hate it here. But I'm glad Jack is more chill about danny while he's a ghost, and willing to work with him for this ep. AND. I DID ENJOY JACK PUNCHING VLAD IN THE FACE. AND GENERALLY JUST OWNING HIM. the ghost punchy fists are actually amazing. like yeah, just punch a ghost in the face. that rules.

-ep 20 opens with the coolest fucking ghost lady design. her tattoos can come off and fight. MA'AM. I like ur nose ring and your cape maam hello 👉👈😳

-sam's grandma is hilarious and the most valid member of her family and I love her. thats my grandma now. and tucker covering for sam by dressing as her. thats true friendship <3 also skipping school to go to a goth circus. just bestie things! sam's parents are haters but for all the wrong reasons.

-'my family has controlled ghosts with this for generations!' WAIT. WAIT FREAKSHOW /ISNT/ A GHOST? I didn't expect that...he's just a fucked up guy controlling ghosts? anyway watching danny shoot at police cars and rob banks while mind controlled. its like, the most stereotypical 'bad' things lmao. (tbh an evil ghost circus troupe is a sick concept)

this gives off big deviantart emo edit vibes

(I'm going to assume evil circus reaper danny has a lot of fan content. people love an edgy au, except this one is canon (even tho its via mind control...having the protag go evil otherwise might be hard, I guess?) but au where he stays with the troupe...that has to exist, right?)

ANYWAY. excited to start s2!! lowkey surprised by how many notes some of these posts have gotten. I've gone back and tagged them all with 'dp thoughts' so they're easier to find on my blog! ^^ and I will probably possibly do (more) fanart on my art blog after I finish the watch of the whole show, so like. @sanchoyodraws follow my art blog :)

[azucanela]

CANELA’S RECS [HAIKYUU!! & BNHA]

hi everyone! i’ve laid off writing a tad since the end off fluffvember, so here are a few of the amazing fics and talented writers i have encountered during this time. i reblog fics more frequently on my side blog @zurandom​ so feel free to follow me there as well <3 i dont consume much content myself but here are a few i recommend!

BLOG RECS

@dimplesum​ [bnha & haikyuu!!] it really doesn’t matter how short or how long each of her writings are, she never disappoints. i honestly love the writing style and she has produced so much amazing content, when she reviewed one of my fics i was just like :0. she seems so nice and everything she writes is so elaborate and intricately done. one of the best blogs i have encountered, i am honored to be a moot. im really excited to read more of her content!

@marilags​ [bnha, haikyuu!! & more] EVERYTHING. and i mean EVERYTHING i have read by them is astonishing, amazing beautiful. they’re such well crafted ideas that honestly hit close to home for some unknown reason bUT THEY DO. though i only followed recently i know for a fact it is impossible to be disappointed literally just pure talent here. 

@neoheros​​ [bnha & haikyuu!!] timestamps GALORE, all of them are so beautifully crafted i swear. not only has she written for a wide variety of characters, but she also produces such amazing content with several different ideas that all manage to just hit you in the feels. one of the first blogs i followed on tumblr so i definitely recommend!

@svnarintaro​ [bnha & haikyuu!!] a really nice content creator with a ridiculously aesthetic theme for their blog! she has lots of creative and unique ideas and headcanons especially so im really excited to watch their account grow and so glad to have become their mutual<3

FIC RECS

BNHA

[00:00] by @sukiglycerin​ [bakugou katsuki] wholesome, short and sweet, start of the year bakugou fluff. lovely.

bloodlines by @dimplesum​ [monoma neito] i literally did not like monoma until i started reading monoma fics pls. this is very well written!! i adore it!! yes!! 

definitely what it looks like by @todourouki​ [bakugou katsuki] i loved this with a passion. thats it. thats all. it was so well written AND the characterization felt PERFECT. it’s a cute concept and all around funny and i am so glad this was made it’s basically one of my favorite fics. 

new year’s eve(nt) by @sipsteainanxiety​ i havent read everything on this list but from what i have read it’s very wholesome and well written! lots of bakugou content atm hehe. also fun tropes i love it.

the smell of the ocean by @rccket-writes​  not only do i adore the formatting here, but it was beautifully written in all honesty, i just really like the way the words do the word things.

the weight of love by @writeiolite​ [todoroki shouto] hurt comfort? i dunno but its lovely! very well written in my opinion and worthy of a read :D

HAIKYUU!!

[12:08am] by @iwaizoom​ [kuroo] TALENT. PURE TALENT. AND PAIN. they always have really good timestamps so i must recommend just going through the entire count and checking them out but this one in particular hit DIFFERENT.

[3:00am] by @iwaizoom​ [kageyama tobio] again, pure art. i love how there were other characters incorporated into this and all the little things that build it up, its a nice way to recover from the pain i previously suggested.

best to worst to meet your parents by @haikyuuphilia​ bye literally so much of what this author has written is funny i love it, i adore their characterization in this and all their other works pls.

little things they do by @xakusa​ wholesome. that’s it. pure fluff. short and sweet i love it.

stupid polyester jacket by @bbykutos​ written by my lovely wife, it is very well written and very heartbreaking but pls read it and give it some love <3

surnames by @marilags​ [ushijima wakatoshi] for some reason im in love with ushijima and this is definitely one of those reasons. this was such a cute and carefully though out idea. also the presentation of this fic is just goregeous im literally jealous of how nice the aesthetic is but that’s besides the point. this was honestly really relatable because i love my last name and would never want to give it up so INSTANT comfort fic, thank you for writing this :D

why their relationships thrive by @sugawara-sweetheart​  very wholesome, comprised of a few characters these are very wholesome and well written with great characterization! <3

you superglue a lid shut by @1plus1kiyoomi​ bye this was perfect, i lived for the characterization it was fun!!

[dragqueenpentheus]

Okay no one has to read this but i DO have to write it:

PYROC VS FATHER PAUL

Ya bitch needs an art break bc im getting angry about voices existing as i try to keep myself entertained. Today is NOT a god one for sinking into repetitive line work and that’s just about all i have on the table atm

SO! Im gunna do a little thinking about my little meow meows all fucked up by religion. Just a comparison for my sanity and interests. Pyroc is my baby i wrote him for the first time years ago. Five?????????? Whadda hell. Going on six.

ANYWAY john joined religion because of his trauma. His sister died and he felt lost. He was unmoored in this fishing village and looking for reason looking for hope. Hed had his heart broken and trying to make sense of tragedy on his own was totally beyond him. Thats why his interactions with riley in AA are SO good like. He knows that confusion and he knows the rhetoric that’s supposed to combat it. Only it dooesnt work for riley.

The same sort of thing happens for pyrc, only inverted. Loss urns him away from god and religion because its SO strong in his family and not only is he loosing trust in god, but his kin as well. He’s suspicious there’s mre they arent telling him, at the point of his fathers death. And he agrees to, on the surface, absolutely wholly throw himself in to being the second the family and the village need. But he’s keeping his treachery under wraps.

That’s one of the coolest things about father paul imo is like. That slow unraveling of what is. Frankly. An awful half assed plan, driven by fear and loneliness and desperation and dementia and love. Even VERY obvious things like. Taking down the newspaper photo of his young self ‘slip’ by him. I think, on some level, its DEEPLY intentional. He wants people to CHOOSE this. He wants people like bev. He wants people who see him and are in aw of him beating god. Of killing death. He wants to be worshiped and adored and for people to come to him willingly, no tragedy driving them to his arms.

Pyroc also wnats to be worshipped, but he ALSO wants to do the worshipping. He really longs for an element of almost????? But not quite??? Subjection?? He wants to be shown something and for a Great Voice to tell him, unquestioningly and unerringly that it is GOOD. Full stop. And then he wants to spend his life worshipping it. But this booko is an exploration of how….. no such thing exists. And more importantly no great voice exists either. There is nothing wholly good, nothing wholy evil. His lack of faith in himself once he becomes god is him starting to understand that as well. Thats on purpose baked into the lore. The starting point was ‘what if god was a position and in order to get promoted you had to be a murderer. No matter what’. He understands things are not wholly good, at that point. I onder how long it will be for him to realize they are not fully evil as well?

Bc pruitt does hm hm hm an interesting move. Where he takes something the narritve is very sure to communicate is EVIL no wiggle room just fact. Even if its driven by animal instinct its. Evil. And he makes it, not just good, but HOLY. And god i LOVEEEE that for him i ADOREEE that what a MOVE. Driven by desperation and dementia and relief and ‘if god saved me than maybe i can be good despite loving and sinning and maybe if i defeat god then i will be Thee Good’. SO sexy of him. Im really fascinated by his morality. He seems to have an understanding of the shades of grey in some respects??? But if he had a BETTER one with more forgiveness in his heart i feel like hed have left the church anyway after sarah was born??? Even if millie didnt ask him??? That might just be my own sensibilities creeping in but ….. like he culd have seen her on the weekends. He can do other jobs. Hes straight (??? Not totally convinced of this) he could have just dated her that makes me crazy. LIKE OBV HE HAD LINES HE THOUGHT THAT WOULD CROSS AND HE HAD INTERNALIZED THE CHURCH AND THE RULES AND SHE WAS MARRIED AND ECT ECT i know he couldnt have really but. Thye were straight. They coulda.

Im not gunna do fantasy homophobia bc i think its …………….. Boring. But i think some element of??? The vindlegaurd line MUST be passed along and for that particular rules must be applied. But thats also boring as hell :/ maybe i can work in my parthenogenesis lore?????????? I bet pyroc would love building that spell in any universe. That’s the sequal when he goes to magic university in helsin. But yeah i do like the concept that. Anyone can have a baby thru magic its just a time and energy commitment. Just a matter of wanting it enough together. Every baby is so deeply wanted and its mere existence is proof. Thats dope i love that. HMMM to be decided at a later date when im deeper into the story i think. I still havent figured out fully how and where and why orion is going to be invovled and if???? Pyroc and orion are even going to be romantic??????? Im torn im TORn…….

Thikns about john bonding w sarah over science and learning and starts wEEPING…. Like theres some surity beloved. Its just a matter of uncovering. I think sarah felt that same thirst for answers and hunted them differently. Her faith is in logic and science. I loveeee her god. Every scene w her and her dad absolutely RUIN me like!!!!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW LOVED SHE IS!!!!!! I hope at hte very end she saw the blood as the gesture of love it SO clearly was and not him trying to poison her. God i love that she spat it out. GOD. Thats about being gay, btw. Spits the religious offering that could save you across the gasoline soaked church floor like BABE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think we as a collective should talk about the possibiites around sarah/erin more. Bc their defiance combined would be. Earth SHATTERING for crockett.

In the future pyroc gets a kid. Ever since that campaign where Enemy ended up playing his daughter im like. How did i NOT know this idiot wanted nothing more in the entire world than to travel it with his daughter. I dont care how or why hes getting a kid. Hed be so doting and awful abut it. He would need orion as a co-parent for the kids self esteem to be normal levels. thINKS ABOUT PAUL GETTING TO RAISE SARAH AND JUST ABSOLUTELY GASSING HER UPPPPPPPP HANGING EVERY DOODLE SHE EVER MADE ON TEH FRIDGE. BOASTING ABOUT HER SCEINECE PROJECT OT ANYONE WITHIN EYESIGHT EVEN THOUGH ‘WE K N O W JOHNWE WERE ALL AT THE SCEINCE FAIR’!!!!!!!!!!! Let these fuck ups be doting fathers im fucking begging. That scene where paul is like. You take ccare of everyone on the island sarah. Its more than being a doctor. You comfort them.

HM HM comfort is such a thing for Miss Bitch like!! He sees it as a Good Thing. He tries to bring it for riley by asking to hold the AA meetings on island ((also manipulation. Obvously also manipulation. I wouldnt have bene shocked if he was slipping the vampire blood into the coffee every meeting either. But thats just a theory. A game theory.)) ANYWAY he sees comfort as hly. The church gave it to him when he needed it. The angel gave it to him in the cave. Feeling safe and warm is HIGH on his list of priorities and what makes him hand over respect.

I think pyroc has lived a very comfortable life in SO many ways, but in none he. Activly recognizes. A key part of his character arc his him…. Opening his eyes to the world around them. Seeing the privilege he has and being like. Wait. This isnt Right. We have to change thi. And when no one agrees ti shifts to I have to change this. With Violence. A little revolutionary <3 it only costs the life of his whole ass family

Thats more fun comparison ground like…… paul is SO much about I know whats right and there is a cost but i AM ignoring it. Like HE KNOOOOWSSSS he knooooows he just doesnt want o See. I’m not sure if im going to surprise yroc with the ……megadeath of. His whole family. Or if it’s a choice he has to activly make. I think a choice makes it more compelling, more layerd. It has to be in the moment though, becaus ei think thats. A key difference between them. Pyroc wouldnt do it.. hed just leave hed peace out and do what he could in small ways. But he wouldnt do his big stand off with god. Hed shrink his goals in order to not hurt his family. Out of love?? Intimidation?? Some instinct wihtin him that balks at the idea of disobedience??? I think even he doesnt know. But i LOVE john becaue he jsut decides to lie. He closes his eyes and says i am being stupid on purpose. I think thats PERHAPS more compelling than good guy coward pyroc BUT!!!!! Thats who he is rip to ths little man. Cant change him now hes a whole ass child in my head. The PLOT i can change. Him….. not without massive character development <3

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MM set my brain on FIRE!!!! Im so glad nano is coming up. I love sharpening pyroc against the comparison of other AMAZING characters. Father paul hill my beloved millstone <3 anyway sorry to anyone who reads this its literally me unhinging my jaw and emptying my brain out. I had to write stuff that wasn’t novel or fic. A little character time down and dirty. I wil NOT be editing this love and light to future me trying to decode this

[enzo-zzz]

A vent on the fandom + cg

If you dont wanna hear any negativity, please just ignore this post. It includes dissatisfication on the yttd fandom and ongoing belief in it. I'm not going to use very kind words here, so just ignore this post. 3b spoilers included.

I like yttd so much, but the english fandom, i cannot interact because how toxic it is. Even the smallest different of which route you choose, will attract anyone to abuse, harrass, ridicule or humiliate you. And to be truth, there are many of them who are so judgemental, to the point that there is only one thing that are right and the other are wrong. Black and white mindset. The term "canon route" is what fans created itself. I guess there are many of them who are teens or kids, since most of kids who havent grown up yet tend to lean towards black and white mindset, even if they believe they are not. If you find people who keep arguing especially on social media, you can bet that its teens. Adult are too tired to involve in things like fighting with strangers. There is one time when the poll asked your age and the age range quite small to teens age. I guess thats why i think so.

OTHER THAN THAT, THERE'S ONE THING I'M ANNOYED WITH. ABOUT THE CG AND HOW THE FANDOM DECIDES THAT THE MORE CGS, THE MORE CANON IT IS. To be perfectly honest, i'm the one who came up with the analysis that on certain route 2-2 ending the cg is more. But people really use it the wrong way and now thought that anything that has more cg is the canon route. The word canon route is wrong in itself, who tf come up with the term canon route in yttd? Is the reason for creating two route is for one to be canon only, or for sparing different characters, or for having different storyline? (I personally think that on different route, the story will change and the ones who got to live at last is probably different ). Now i see those who misuse that information everywhere. "In sou route 2-2 ending evil joe AI dont even have new cg but in kanna route he has. See how biased the devs are? he should have drawn more if he really meant the route to be the canon one. Kanna route will get happy ending, sou route is bad ending." I think thats stupid. B*tch, he keep reusing his old art here and there. You can check for yourself. Joe and midori has same hand based on the cg? He's just reusing the hand art. The arm in 3b and 1-1 is the same arm he reuse. Sou and kanna 2-2 ending basically use the same sou drawing, he just changed it a bit. Sara in 2-2 kanna ending use the same cg as when keiji try to calm her in front of computer, he just changed the face. Midori and sara on the 3b game screen cg basically use the same cg in the 3b content, but changed a bit. So i can think why need to create new cg when joe is still malicious as the hallucination in 2-2 sou ending? If i want to create something i will also reuse this to save my time.

So if you wanna really use this cg argument, then maybe you can consider why alice memory game got so many more cg than reko's? and how ranmaru gone insane has so many new sprite and pose with the hair like that. And why when dummy is dead they got cg's. Especially the ranmaru dying one, he got moving cg's and how it was put more effort into that. Then that means dummy dying is actually the canon route since when they alive they got no addtional cg? This is my assumption, but i think the devs just do as many cg as it takes depends on how impactful the scene he's working on, not because its canon, thats really a lazy take if he is actually unwilling to do extra route but still forcing himself to do it anyway. Imagine if dummy is dying but no cg, instead a message " ranmaru/mai/anzu died ". Do you think that will really give impact to you? This game clearly hinting that joe is going to be the spotlight of the game, even in 3b. So when sou set the real joe ai in kanna route for sara, the script is written for the real joe to genuinely react to sara. of course thats going to be heartwrenching since joe himself is the very important part of sara's life. When the script is made that way, lacking of cgs will hamper down the storytelling nankidai genuinely want to deliver. All i can say is it come from the heart of the author himself. If it is just only text for something as tearful as that moment and no cgs, it wont really touch the feeling isnt it? It is the same with alice memory game that tells about how alice "kill" midori. I'm not sure how many it is but atleast there is 3 cgs with one of them has variant. The story of how alice kill midori is also important and should have impact, thus the extra CG's. I can say its about being passionate and indulged in the storytelling.

I dont even know if joe will ever heal sara in sou route, but based on how the story still keep joe relevant til the end, then there must be something that need to happen between them in the end right? Nankidai even made sure that sara see the dog keychain in 3a if player probably choose to not ask gin about the dog keychain he's hiding in ch 2. Its also for relating ranmaru and joe. Having closure or conclusion with joe in the middle of game is still valid, and having a closure with joe at the end of the game is still valid. Imo, having closure with joe at the end of the game after all of those suffering involving him makes the better climax or impact for sara chara development since the game build up to highlight joe and mr. Policeman, it can be even better if all of it are to be pull together in the ending.

Even if the devs has route he prefer, he's not abandoning any route he less prefer, only if its true that he ever have a route he prefer. Plus you dont know which route he's prefer if any. He's taking his work seriously, it just some "fans" looking down on him, even to the point calling him biased, he's punishing the one who take another route, treating like he only use his career for egostatiscal reason (it somehow clearly mirrors that you are the one who egostatiscal to the point of wanting to find any excuse to punish other, you just using the devs name to validate your mindset). If he's dislike people who chose that route that much, then why create that route? If he know its tiring to make alternate route, then why still make the choice to let 3 dummy alive route at the end? It will make more work. I can only assume its out of passion, or just that he deep down wants the character to be alive atleast in a route ( idk if this is correct, i just read google translated version of his public fanbox that he's actually very reluctant at first when the time comes and "crying" so hard when he had to kill joe in chapter 1. So the part where he wants to spare some character is only my assumption ). By this punishing logic, shouldnt he not make alice die when you push reko ai to spare gin, and only do it to those who dont push the ai to save gin by killing real reko? I am more sure that the variants is to tell a different story or who to spare, and specifically for who sara actually was.

Happy endings? I'm not sure. I've expected that once from story with a lot of deaths, wishing for atleast the protagonists alive. Anime or story with a lot of death is definitely my jam, but from what i see, most of them has bittersweet ending, it depends on how the author wants it to be. Some author dont mind killing them all till the end, and some author just easily kill them all because they plan to revive them later. And everyone sense is different. Some japanese people sense in storytelling is a bit different imo. As the one being the audience, happy endings is the most common wish the audience wants. But its all up to the sense of the author. This is why i'm annoyed with some kids from overseas who rarely watch or play many things that involves a lot of death from japan suddenly says that this "one happy ending, this one bad ending! Everyone will survive in this route, everyone dead in this route"

Just play any route you like, nothing wrong with that. Whats wrong is to start this war of ridiculing others or have that irritating attitude towards those who play their own first route and start bad mouthing or desperately throwing bad assumption that one route will end very bad just for the sake of feeling better for your choice and to scare others.You do know that when you read a book, you'll only know if the overall story is good or bad until you know the ending right? The ending will conclude everything that happened. What happening in the fandom is now like, you only read 3/4 of the book and already expecting that this one will have good ending and bad ending. What if its not about the binary, but for the difference in direction? Its not that bad if the story of the book is kinda predictable, but with how plot twists become the main part of yttd's charm, its getting more difficult to predict how it will end. There's a lot of story which was masterpiece in every part as seen by fans, until the ending hits. Its what the author wants, but its not what the fans wants.

If you pick fights with others, even passively, the consequence is all on you. Good luck taking care of your mess.

Thats why i'm reluctant to publish any theory because the fandom will always use it as an excuse to pick fights with other and say " i'm more right bcs i got this proof" . U see in my caption i dont want any of those harasser to even digest my theory. If you are one of them get out of my blog.

[mowuune]

UH?? we're actually close to 1k followers ??

I should do something.. what would you guys want 🤔 i wanted to make some sort of thing where anyone could like, participate while doing someth creative and have fun .. (kindergarten arts and crafts time?? Maybe lol)

I could also!!

- Do A Meet the Artist ? My last one here is so old..

- An art raffle ??

- ok ok my real thought: a DTIYS, like i did last time at 500 follows i think? where i provided the lineart and the the colored version so you could either just color it in or redraw it in your style .. was considering doing a sort of drawing where if you're a writer you could write a short thing too .. (IDK i just feel writers get left out of this sort of thing and as someone who also writes.. gjfjfg)

If anyone has anything else they'd like to see though, I'm definitely down for multiple things?

(Rest of post under cut bc I REALLY STARTED TALKING ALOT .. HAHA)

Just wanna show my appreciation, it's been about.. 2 years? 2 and a half? And i remember starting this blog at probably the worst point of my life as a sanders sides content blog (to kinda cope, now that i think about it), thinking nothing would come of it. Nail in the coffin (in a good way, if thats possible ? Haha) was when i read Powerless (hi Elena!) and really the point where I just.. went up from there.

I've met so many cool people, and so many cool people approached me? It feels a little insane! I've spoken about this before but there was a point where I quit drawing because I was getting well. Bullied. About it, and how terrible it was.

And there was another more recent point in my life where I had to claw through my own fear and doubt and other people trying to put me down to try doing what I'm doing now, to actually pursue what I like doing. While I've definitely heard of many other horror stories that I would say are worse than mine, I've had to hear some pretty rough things from people I thought were always right, and I'm still learning that that might not be the last of it.

There are.. quite a few things I just haven't spoken about that have led me to where I am now, but? Honestly if you want to ask me anything, my inbox is open. I'll answer it if I'm comfortable! I'd be down to give some insight, especially as a Muslim/Not Cishet person of color.( since uh. Let's not kid ourselves we tend to have a harder time when pursuing this sort of thing)

(Also Did You Know: I was trying to be an accounting major at some point?? I failed 3 of my courses that semester haha..)

Anyway. Uhm, I guess I'm saying all of this because

1) thank you guys for.. literally proving past me wrong i havent like, made it yet (i know 1k isnt.. too large in the grand scheme) but the fact that I've come to a point where I.. can look at my art and be proud .. yeah.

2) HEY. YOU THERE. The artist (or any creative) that is behind the screen, reading this and may not be at a good point yet, where you're satisfied: don't give up!! I'm rooting for you!! Keep doing what you love, and honestly? It's alright to do it as Something You Just Do. You don't have to make it a Thing. If you love it, you should do it. In what frequency, to what capacity... that's all upto you!

3) YOU, specifically the hijabi/muslim creative behind the screen, possibly Not Cishet.. you can do it. I know people have probably said you couldn't but. You can. I'm sending you all my love and support. Thank you for being here, but more. Thank you for also continuing to do what YOU love despite anything you must have had to hear people tell you.

Anyway uhm, WOW. this got long! Sorry for getting carried away? But If you read this far, thank you again for your support, whether new or old! I appreciate every single one of you 💖 and I hope you have good days ahead! Let me know what you guys want to do when that 1k hits!!

- Momo 💖

[bloopbyoop]

weep woop

ayo. ive read my scheduled email and its time for freewriting shit again. lmao. I want this post to be like a small light from a lit match stick inside a very hollow, icy, and numbing cave. (sounds cartoonish right? I know. Im obsessed with Adventure Time.) I want all people to be genuinely happy.  Spiritually, emotionally, and physically. Upon reaching my 24th anniversary in this world, I finally learned how to truly embrace all my emotions. Some are more overwhelming than the other, but we have to heed in our treacherous yet perplexing minds that everything is fleeting and we are in control. The feeling of extreme sadness fades, but so does joyful states. Everything can change in a matter of minutes or years. You are in control of all your emotions. You are in control of all your life choices. Your actions. Your words. Your perspective. It feels weird to actually write about it. I've wanted to talk about it. I never wanted help from anyone as I firmly believed that I was alone. Sure, I have a family and friends, but it is hard to see that when your head is clouded with negativity. I've even come to the point where I was too overwhelmed, I found being physically hurt less painful. The pain I felt distracted me from what I was thinking. My mind tended to go bonkers. lmao. But bro, I was so good at concealing my bonkers mind. It's easy to fake any emotion that you have. Slap anything sunshine-y or happy to anything and people would believe you. It went on for years. Long story short, thousands of bracelets collected, it became worse. The physical pain could no longer withhold the emotional pain. Couldn't sleep. Couldn't stop thinking. And voila! I found a good amount of self help books (from tumblr) and novels. Novels that brought me to different places. Self-help books that made me understand what I feel and what to do. I've read that taking the easy way out will leave everyone sad. AND IN THE FIRST PLACEEEEEE, I NEVER WANT THATTTTTTT. I want everyone to be happy. I would act foolish and do dumb shit to make everyone happy in a heartbeat. So, that idea made me push a few more years. Later on, the crippling shit came crawling back again to my head, sooooooo I needed new shit to keep me distracted again. Films, series, music, and short clips from YouTube helped me out a lot. Every single time that my mind is going to think like anything that can think of, even to the point that I was just going to think that I might be hungry, I'd watch something. There's just something about silence for me. Because of this new habit of mine, I've learned more about myself. I love different types of things. I like horror. I like thriller. I like comedy. I like romance. I love all types of films, but there is something about the horror genre that interests me. I still can't point out what, but I love watching horror films. With regards to music, I've learned that I love Indie, Punk Rock, Rap, and Pop. We all can't like a specific genre. It's stupid to ask "what genre of music do you like?". It's not actually stupid-stupid, it's just stupid. Ya know? Anyway, passing this phase, I needed to find something again because it's not doing the shit that it was supposed to, I tried investing more time on video games. By investing more, I mean a whole shit lot. I love video games since I was young cuz.... u know.... they keep u... try to guess it! oh yeah. you got that right! distracted! I love the aggressive plays and trashtalks that my friends and I make. The short stories we tell one another. The rants. The lame jokes. The late night we sound drunk but we are not drunk jokes. The roleplays. The lame jokes. The memes. And once again, The lame jokes. Something about lame jokes and the laughs and curses after that always gets me every single time. Oh shoot. Yup Yup. Few years later, I finally noticed the pattern that my sadness is temporary. I got over it one way or the other (or another. depends on how you wanna read it. i dont wanna say another cause i might write about one direction like what im doing now so-). Happiness is temporary as well. But, we are the ones who are actually in control of our emotions. If you wanna feel sad, be sad for a while. You're getting too sad? Try hanging out with your funny friends. Can't do that? Find an alternative. Watch a movie, knit a sweater. Anything your mind could think of as long as it will keep you mentally distracted from being physically and mentally hurt. I do have a few notes though. We cannot and should never assume what people are going through. It may be petty for you, but it may be very crucial to them. So never everrrr say things like: -Some people have it worse than you -At least you have ..... These sheetsss are annoying as heckkk and could really down someone. I know it is not your intention to annoy but people react differently. alsooooooo, it is not okay or normal to hate on things for bandwagon. that is just plainly crazy and stupid. let people enjoy things. anddddddd never suppress your emotions. admit what you feel inside and try to think of a way to resolve ittttt. keeping it to yourself will just make it worseeeeee. find your own outlettttttttt. hihihi ️ alsooooo. being more spiritually full with God's words and ideas really help me to be spiritually happy. ps. im christian but i dont discredit other religion and even applaud other religion's ideas and beliefs. this is a really long, selfish post so i might as well recommend some things I like : Songs with their lyrics that made me go through life. “I’ve got soul but I’m not a soldier” -All These Things That I've Done, The Killers “It's not too late, I'm still right here” -Breaking Your Own Heart, Kelly Clarkson "And the salt in my wounds / Isn't burning any more than it used to / It's not that I don't feel the pain / It's just I'm not afraid of hurting anymore / And the blood in these veins / Isn't pumping any less than it ever has / And that's the hope I have / The only thing I know that's keeping me alive" -Last Hope, Paramore “There is not a single word in the whole world / That could describe the hurt / The dullest knife just sawing back and forth / And ripping through the softest skin there ever was / How were you to know?” -Hate to See Your Heartbreak, Paramore "It's holding on, though the road's long / And seeing light in the darkest things And when you stare at your reflection / Finally knowing who it is / I know that you'll thank God you did" -1800, Logic "Did some things you can't speak of / But at night you live it all again / You wouldn't be shattered on the floor now / If only you had seen what you know now then" -Innocent, Taylor Swift (My bb) "10 months sober, I must admit / Just because you're clean don't mean you don't miss it / 10 months older, I won't give in / Now that I'm clean I'm never gonna risk it // Rain came pouring down when I was drowning / That's when I could finally breathe / And by morning gone was any trace of you, I think I am finally clean" -Clean, Taylor Swift “I guess I always knew / That I had all the strength to make it through.” -Believe in Me, Demi Lovato "I'm addicted to the madness / I'm a daughter of the sadness / I've been here too many times before / Been abandoned and I'm scared now / I can't handle another fallout / I am fragile, just washed upon the shore / They forget me, don't see me / When they love me, they leave me" -I Hate You, Don’t Leave Me, Demi Lovato “I'm overwhelmed / I need a voice to echo / I need a light to take me home / I need a star to follow / I don't know” -Nightingale, Demi Lovato "I'm a walking travesty / But I'm smiling at everything. // Arrogant boy, Love yourself so no one has to." -Therapy, All Time Low "I tried it once before but I didn't get too far / I felt a lot of pain but it didn't stop my heart. / But maybe I'm alive 'cause I didn't really wanna die / But nothing very special ever happens in my life / Take the blade away from me I am a freak, I am afraid that / All the blood escaping me won't end the pain / And I'll be haunting all the lives that cared for me / I died to be the white ghost / Of the man that I was meant to be" -Ghost, Badflower "Are the pieces of you / In the pieces of me? / I'm just so scared / You're who I'll be / When I erupt / Just like you do / They look at me / Like I look at you" -DNA, Lia Marie Johnson Movies and series to try : -The Perks of Being a Wallflower (The book is bomb af. if yall havent tried, ur missing out) -The Kings of Summer -Never Let Me Go -The Art of Getting By -Silver Linings Playbook -Winter’s Bone -The Lovely Bones (The script. The words) -Me and Earl and the Dying Girl -American Horror Story -Black Swan

pps. remember that every one has their own pace and point of view. don’t push yourself too hard, and don’t overthink. give yourself time, and respect all your emotions. analyze them but not more than like 5 minutes as anything beyond that might cause you to overthink and be sadder. and sad is not rad. hehe. you got this. you got you. self love is the best even though it can be tricky to do. nobody else is like you. you’re the only one of you (i just remembered me.......... i might have hummed it while typing it mid sentence). consider other people’s opinion but do not let it cloud your own judgement as you know yourself best. dont let other comment’s define you. spread love. vibe people you vibe with. ayeeee lets go!!! 

ppps this is my last post bc im happier now and know myself better. i no longer limit myself on the age that I want. I want to live as long as how God wants me to be. hehe. 

x :D

[luvreyn]

My Manhwa List (2019) pt. 4

And the list continues ~

The Reason Why Raelina Ended Up at the Duke’s Mansion

Summary:

Poisoned to death by her own betrothed?! Eunha didn’t wake up in a novel’s story just to get killed off again as an unfortunate extra! To change her story she needs a cover… 6 months pretending to be the fake fiancée of the novel's male protagonist, Duke Noah Wynknight. But will this cold-hearted, angel-faced demon of a man really help her avoid another ill-fated ending?!

WHY YOU SHOULD READ:

this is like my second discovered manhwa so it’s very high on my list

plot = 6/5 the plot twists are awesome hail the author

noah freaking wynknight

mc is smart and capable and knows how to use guns she is no damsel in distress my friends

mc knows and uses her knowledge efficiently

adam 

art style - 6/5

the king is awesome

the villain is unexpected bcuz ohmygahd i didnt see that one coming

R A E L I N A

noah being in love 

the reasons and logic are all justified and reasonable

very lovable characters that you would understand

has the right amount of angst/comedy/romance/drama 

facial expressions are on point they are memeable 

in conclusion: read this because this is one of the best manhwa ever like ever i mean who havent read this gem you’re missing out if you havent

My Life as an Internet Novel

Summary:

Every novel has the usual cast: a gorgeous heroine, handsome boys vying for her attention, and a homely best friend at the heroine’s side. Dani, an ordinary student and avid reader of internet novels, is all too familiar with these tropes. But she never imagined that one day she’d wake up at the center of one herself! Her new fictional world is complete with a beautiful best friend named Yeoryung, and four impossibly good-looking boys who all happen to be in her class.  Dani is determined to stay out of the way and not get involved in the twists and turns of the plot. But is she really just the sidekick -- or is Dani actually the leading lady? Anything is possible in the world of a novel!

WHY YOU SHOULD READ:

the mc’s reasons and fears are justified and reasonable 

the characters are all lovable 

plot = 5/5 very diff from iseka-ish stories that just went with the flow of their new life this mc’s reactions are realistic and shouldn’t be invalidated 

art style is decent

yeoryong loving her bff and prioritising her is love

the characters are complex and have their own personality

yeoryeong x dan - i

the bff’s bro is handsome

the male characters are all handsome and cute and understanding

spoiler: they believed in their friend and that’s pure friendship 

their friendship are goals i just want to cry because they didnt invalidate the feelings and fear of the mc 

yeoryeong x eun ji ho

dan - i x chun young

Lady Beast 

Summary:

An arranged marriage that ends in a body swap?! The quiet Princess Elissa has lived a miserable life thus far. To get away from it all she agrees to marry the war tyrant, Duke Ginger of Landall Kingdom. But by some evil curse, the new couple wakes up in each other's bodies! Between royal functions to attend and getting used to their physical changes, can they keep their cool long enough to find a way to switch back? Or will they be stuck like this forever?!

WHY YOU SHOULD READ:

red haired characters are awesome

plot = 4/5 the body switching concept is put nicely and are nicely done 

art style = 4/5 

reactions are funny

ml is husband material

ml teasing the mc 

number question: why are they swapping bodies no one knows

light read so read it you want to just have a good time 

The Contract Concubine

Summary:

As the deadliest assassin in the Seong Empire, Yeseo is stumped by very few jobs that come her way. But when Emperor Ahon hires her to find the spy hiding in his palace, she must also play the part of his new airheaded concubine as a cover. It takes all her patience to keep up her lovey-dovey act with Ahon during the day, and all her smarts to sniff out the enemy at night. If only she could wrap up this job quickly and collect her handsome reward-- but with so many suspicious officials and the tangled web of alliances inside the court, it's hard to tell who the true culprit could be. Can Yeseo catch this mysterious spy before she loses her sanity and blows her own cover?

WHY YOU SHOULD READ:

what can i say, i just love stories that has politics and history

funny and fantastic

A H H O N

it has a lot to offer 

art style = 5/5

plot = 4/5 

i think this has dark themes but surprisingly it’s a light read for me bcuz of the pov of yesuh

who is the traitor who is the spy

the white silver fox dude reminds me of gin ichimaru

ahhon x yesuh

Daughter of the Archmage

Summary:

Mabel’s been mocked her whole life for her nonexistent magical ability, but when she finally meets her true father, it’s the all-powerful archmage, Raquiel! Forced by an imperial pact to let her go long ago, he can now welcome her into his home, with his half-wolf butler, three nymph sisters, a fox halfling, and a kind disciple to watch over her. But dark secrets from his past threaten to catch up with them. Will his magic be enough to protect her? Could she even come into a power all her own?

WHY YOU SHOULD READ:

if you love wmmap, you’re gonna love this

plot = 3.5/5

art style = 4/5

ngl rykell is one of the top candidates for best daddy award

rykell doesnt hate his daughter ok 

sweet and adorable father-daughter moments

maybelle deserves the world

this is a warm and light read if you just want to enjoy reading 

p.s the scanlation team is dropping this because the author said so BUT there’s going to be an official english translation next year (i think jan 2020?) 

a lot of questions that’s going to make you want more

[houseki-no-suffering]

Pssst.... gush about some thing you’ve wanted to for so long but haven’t found the ask to do so! I really like reading your metas or off-the-wall posts.

aw ty!

mmmh usually i just crank out a random meta when i feel like it, which i havent had the energy to do in a while. so have a lot of hcs about gem language, gem society and how it resembles a totalitarian system cause why not, this is already a dystopia. 

goes from cute to shady real quick, have fun

Gem Vocabulary

gems have no gender, they dont age, they dont reproduce. the whole vocabulary about relationships, aging and sex must be completely different in gem language. they probably lack a lot of words we commonly use, and have unique words for things we dont have (like winter duty, patrol duty... i wouldnt be surprised if gem language had unique grammatical features for those)

this is one of the reasons why its so unfair of aechmea to call cairn ‘wife’ and ‘princess.’ the gems have no concept of wife-ness, we dont know if a gem equivalent of marriage exists, but its definitely much, much different from what the lunarians (and us) perceive as one.

do gems have anything akin coming of age? this could be weird bc gems can potentially live forever, but they can also be abducted by the lunarians at any time, so who’s to say how long a lustrous will live? how do you calculate being ‘of age’? is it by calculating the average life-span of a gem? 

how do they measure time and seasons? we know they have winter and summer and phos mentions ‘spring’ in chapter 20, but what about months and lunar phases? do they have words for that or are months just too small a timeframe for the immortal lustrous to utilize? how do they measure time? in hours and seconds? weeks? different units altogether?

Gem Relationships

similarly, gem relationships are codified in a completely different way. we know they have a concept of romance bc dia ships phos and shinsha and makes comments here and there about other gems being in love. 

at the same time, the relationships btw alexandrite and chrysoberyl, padpa and rutile, ghost/cairn and lapis etc are little different from ‘pure’ sibling/sibling relationships or senpai/kohai relationships.

this is not to say that they’re all romantic in nature, but the way they’re codified in canon (especially in the way the characters grief for their partner) makes me think that even if the gems have no blood/physical kinship with one another they have a very articulated system of establishing family bonds.

dia and bort are clearly siblings, but the same can’t be said, for example, for rutile and padpa, even if they were partners and even if they display a similar junior/senior relationship. this means that relationships are predicated on something else in hnk, and kinship, family and romance are all codified in a different way.

think of vulcans in star trek: physical contact such as two fingers touching, holding hands and kissing is unknown of (save for very specific circumstances). and vulcan people have a completely different way of expressing intimacy and romance than humans. 

this makes me think: just how many canonically romantic relationships are there in hnk (if any) that we’re simply unaware of bc the way gems codify and express romance is so different from ours? is romance even common? rare? perceived as weird? useless? 

what about other relationships? the gems use ‘little brother/ older brother’ but what if this is just japanese approximations? what kind of relationships can lustrous language really express and how different are they from ours?

Imagination

as @ruddy-rutile​ pointed out some time ago, the gems lack a concept of fantasy. thats why i posted that panel about alex’s original lunarian designs. sure, it’s funny, but it also makes you think: these gems are not raised to think outside the box and they can do it without being told so only under exceptional circumstances.

of the vast library of texts that ghost (and lapis) used to take care of, just how many are novels and fiction? none of them? a small amount? a decent amount? in a society thats as focused on practicality, efficiency and conservatism as the lustrous’, how is fiction perceived if perceived at all? 

is there art? red beryl’s craft comes very close to art when they express their feelings about ‘fashion for fashion’s sake,’ but it’s an exception that the other gems find hard to grasp.

phos is often told to stop fantasizing about the world and get things done, the only tale we know the gems are told is the actual story of how their world came to be. the gems always talk about real things, stuff that happened, and make and do things that have a practical use. 

even bort’s jellyfish diary is just made up of a recollection of what happened when they tried to feed them. still, the fact that bort names the jellyfish makes you think that these rocks do have potential for fantasy, theyre just not used to it

Totalitarianism and Privacy

to make this even more shady, here’s your gentle reminder that:

- gems’ rooms have no doors. the only door ive been able to find is the one in shinsha’s room (ch 2) and that is because shinsha’s room is closed off to other people and full of mercury. its like putting a patch on smth you dont want to deal with (much like shinsha’s whole character arc tbh)

- the gems have little to no free time. or their free time can be revoked any time in case an emergency occurs, sensei is napping etc. the gems’ time is rigorously managed by jade, euc and sensei. each gem has a place to be and a time to be.

this means that a missing gem can be found at all times and slackers can be identified very easily. they all have a job and they have to follow it. this is not to say that they have no fun ever, but leisure time is rare and (at least as far as we know) its not contemplated when tasks are assigned each day.

the mere fact that there is a morning assembly and tasks are assigned each day makes you think. is this communism? is this totalitarianism? but most importantly, is this a scary dystopia that hits you in the face like a brick the third time you reread ch 2?   

- sameness > equality. i already went over this in the past. gems society underlines sameness and conformity over anything else. the gems think theyre equal but theyre actually ‘similar.’

a system based on equality emphasizes differences so that every individual can do the best with what they have got and get back what they need, according to their personal needs. 

these gems emphasize sameness: everyone is upheld to the same standards, even when those standards dont match with a gem’s unique characteristics (ie phos cannot be a fighter, no reason to keep saying stuff like ‘if only you were stronger/you’re useless’ etc. they’re a rock with an imagination in a world where dull reality is the rule. just make them write theater plays and play with slugs with shinsha, wth)

It’s real 1984 hours:

all of the above means that:

- your sense of self is subordinated to the group. if you dont belong you’re simply a nothing. at times, the gems almost display a collective consciousness (a pretty hostile one too): everything must be decided together and done together

- you are what you do. gems identify completely with their job. thats why a job is so important, thats why this system is so fucked up. self worth is not inherent, it depends on what you can do. talk about a breeding ground for mental health issues 

- you dont have a saying in picking your career or deciding for you future. thats up to sensei (and maybe euc and jade). unless you have a very strong affinity with a certain task (like red beryl and alex)

- youre expected to follow orders all the damn time. no matter how much sensei wants his gems to exert free will, they still prefer to do what theyre told. ill admit, its much easier than taking your life in your hands and decide what youre gonna do with it, but damn if it isnt depressing. and childish

- euclase and sensei are the authority. sensei and euc are the powers that be. in the sense that they assign tasks, they decide on times and battle plans, on purpose etc. lets not forget that euc was the one to take on sensei’s role after he ‘resigned.’ 

i wonder what would happen if euc were abducted and the gems had no one to follow anymore, no orders. who’d be the new leader? would there be one? lets not forget that no matter how gentle euc is, phos is shit scared of them.

- thought police is a thing. to end this meta on what is probably the shadiest note: surveillance is a thing. the gems report on each other, it’s thought police, no sugarcoating this. 

there’s no privacy, no secrets. even antarc reads rutile’s diary. this goes from cute and childish (’you did this one wrong thing, im gonna tell sensei’) to absolutely fucked up (’you did this one wrong thing, im gonna tell sensei’)

[tricewithaz]

how are you feeling about the grishaverse fandom right now? (general populous attitude, hot topics, fics, art, ect.)

Havent been around here for long but honestly?? It could be way worse. Typically im the kind of person that the moment i see something that bothers me (that really bothers me i mean not something i generally disagree with) i take it out of my dash, i unfollow or mute or whatever so i tend to not see things that bother me. Sure there are some hot takes i dont agree with and whatnot but that happens in any context. Its a piece of media, of art if you will, and that in and on itself is subjective. I barely see genuinely immature or straight up harmful content, barely any fetishization (which, coming from kpop and anime..... damn it feels good), at least that i see.

Something ive really taken notice of is critique. Its just so easy to critique a plot line or a character and everyone is fine with it, even if they dont agree. Everyone shares thoughts, feelings, opinions, etc on the books and its okay. Which, again, coming from a kpop fandom, its mindblowing. Youre telling me no ones going to call me racist or misogynistic, no ones gonna say im being disrespectful towards leigh, no ones gonna scream at me for establishing why i dont like matthias' death? Mindblowing. Feels really nice to not feel guilty about disliking a piece of media within the grishaverse.

I must say, ive barely read any fanfic on here, but the few that ive read, the characterisation is just chefs kiss. Not reducing a character to one (1) personality trait? unheard of. Love to see it.

What i have to say about fanart tho ahem *please stop whitewashing Jesper please please please please*. Like just???? why???? he is described as being like, quite dark. And i see a lot of him either being light skin or even if hes relatively dark with whitewashed features. Please just dont. It really says something that youre loyal to everyones descriptions but him??? cmon. On a more bright side, i love love LOVE how all of us *all of us* draw kaz the same. Like, genuinely. He literally was never described as having a scar on his eyebrow and his lip or an even slightly crooked nose. But we all just...... go with it? i think its cute. Zoya on the other hand is ALWAYS different and i also think its cute how were described someone exceptionally beautiful and all of us think of different features. Love to see it.

And as for my opinions on Alarkling. Listen. I dont ship it. Obviously the Darkling is abusive (and excessively teenage edgy for a 500 year old guy but whatever). However, theres some things about him and about his relationship with Alina that are very interesting and i get why people would ship them (out of canon) and why people would want to explore their relationship. I generally just think that its a bit more complicated than Darkling Bad. This is not to excuse people who genuinely try to excuse his actions and argue that their relationship in canon is equal to malina's and even nikolina's (which is another complicated ship for many various reasons).

Another topic of discourse that i have a bone to pick with is Nikolai's marriage to Ehri. Starting with the topic of her age, although described to be "young", Nikolai himself was also described this way back when he was supposed to be around 21. The whole " Nikolai is a creep because theres an age difference with Ehri" point is one that i find pointless mainly because we don't even know Ehri's age. I feel like people also treat this as something Nikolai wants to do and that he's interested in her instead of what it is: an imprisonment in response to a crime against the Crown. Arguably (and as logical as i find it in context) making someone marry you is..... morally dubious at best. Personally i feel like its just another royal arranged marriage. Terrible in concept, but it is something that existed (and still exists but thats not a topic for this post) and that makes sense in the plot (love me that angsty political and romantic conflict and if leigh doesnt make an ehri pov i might throw myself off a window).

And i think thats all i dont think i have many other hot opinions on this fandom. I generally feel pretty comfortable here.

Sorry this got way too long 🤪