#i have tried to learn Mandarin Spanish and French

[lostbabybunno]

Do you speak any languages other than English?

I've been known to speak nonsense

[draconym]

Since you all had so many kind things to say about my spouse on this post, I will provide you with ten Spouse Facts:

He has a pet rabbit that we found as a stray, which he has clicker trained to do various tricks. He also wrote the rabbit a theme song which he frequently sings to him (when he is not baby talking at him). The rabbit loves this.

He plays the guitar, piano, and dizi (Chinese transverse flute). When I got very sick a few months ago, he wrote a song for me and has sung it to me nearly every day since. He also wrote a (beautiful, heartbreaking) song for his mother who has dementia and whom he visits every day, because music is retained much longer than other kinds of memories.

He doesn't have a car. He is anti-car. He has two bicycles: a Raleigh Record Ace (with a custom paint job featuring a rabbit) and a Lightspeed. He has a lot of biking gear that makes him look like a Pokemon trainer.

He eats raw onions whole like they are apples.

He got serious about baking as a hobby a few years ago, when he was irritated by the imprecision of bread recipes for not stating the optimal temperature of warm water to proof yeast. He created a gas displacement chamber out of jars and aquarium tubing and ran a series of experiments to find out the answer himself. We ate a lot of bread that month.

He taught himself tablet weaving in an afternoon. He also knits, and one time he sewed himself an entire ballroom gown for a Halloween costume because they don't make ballroom gowns in his size.

He's conversational in Spanish, French, Japanese, and Mandarin.

He learned to beatbox in his college a cappella group. (I also beatboxed for my college a cappella group, but my parrot prefers his beatboxing over mine.)

The first time we met in-person was at a Humans vs. Zombies nerf gun LARP. I asked him out to dinner a few weeks later and at the end of the evening I said "let me know if you want to do this again" and before I even finished the sentence he said "I want to do this again."

The last time he ate eggs was about twenty years ago, when he ruined a batch of chocolate merengues and then tried to recombine them with the yolks, creating Chocolate Scrambled Eggs. Apparently it was terrible.

[sweatervest-obsessed]

Violent Delights Have Violent Ends

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!reader

WC: 1.8k

TW: Serial killers, murders, blood, referencing to infidelity,

A/N: This has been something I have been thinking about for a while. I hope y'all enjoy it!

Spencer did not realize that someone could know more about anything intellectual than he did. It honestly baffled him, when Hotch called him into the office, to introduce the two of you. 

“Spencer this is Doctor Y/N Y/L/N, Doctor Y/L/N, this is Doctor Spencer Reid.” 

He gave you a small smile, and a slightly awkward wave. You were beautiful, there was no doubt about it, an absolute plus to the fact that you were intelligent. He was captivated by your eyes but quickly coughed and looked back at Hotch. 

“Doctor Y/L/N—”

“Please Agent, call me by my first name after the initial introductions, Doctor makes me feel a tad bit ridiculous after like the second time.” You couldn’t have been more than twenty four, Reid deduced. 

Hotch smiled at you, nodding. “Please, call me Aaron, or Hotch, I feel the same way about agent. Reid,” He turned towards Reid. “Y/N, is going to be a consultant on this next case, and you two will be working closely together.”

Reid was suddenly excited by the prospect of working with a consultant. He usually dreaded them, but something about you made him excited to actually be able to converse intellectually with someone on the team. 

But luckily for Morgan, you were not what anyone was expecting. You all had boarded the jet, sitting around and chatting since you had a long flight from DC to Oregon, not really willing to get into the details of the case just yet. 

“So, Doctor Y/L/N, what made you choose Shakespeare?” 

You rolled your eyes. “Agent Morgan, if you keep using my official title, you’re going to be talking to the wall. Wanna try again?” 

His jaw dropped slightly, enjoying the banter you were providing. Derek Morgan was far from ugly, far from it. But he simply wasn’t your type. But that did not mean you couldn’t flirt back. 

“Well then, Miss Y/N, why Shakespeare.” 

You smiled, “Shakespeare is just another language. And I already speak French, Arabic, Spanish, some Latin, a little Greek, and I’m learning enough Mandarin and Cantonese to get by on my next trip to China. So understanding Shakespeare from a linguistic point, I’ve already got covered. Especially since it was something I could read easily from a young age.” 

JJ and Emily had stopped their conversation and turned to face you, eagerly listening in to what you have to say. 

“But, from a theatrical point, his writing is so incredibly intricate. There are layers upon layers of text and context and subtext throughout all of his plays and sonnets, not to mention the fact that Shakespeare can be transformed, moved from one thing to another incredibly easily. You have to factor in that he was a misogynist, anti semitic, probably-most-definitely racist, among all of the other things, but adapting his works throughout time is something I have a special interest in, particularly his portrayal of woman and how that has been changed throughout productions over the years, mainly focusing in comedies and this strange need for him to have happy endings end in weddings.”

The jet was all staring at you, while a smirk slowly slid onto Derek’s face. “Looks like you got some competition here, Pretty Boy.” 

You shrugged at Derek, and looked back at your phone. “I appreciate competition more than meaningless run-around conversations Derek. If you’re going to profile me, then just profile me. Or google me really. There’s no need to prod and pretend like you’re not trying to find out whether or not I’m single. If you wanted to ask me out, you should just ask me out.” 

Jaws on the plane dropped. Derek tried to stutter out a response but was cut off by Emily, smirking over at him. “Besides consulting on murder cases, what do you actually do with a PhD in Shakespeare?”

You looked up at Emily and shrugged. “Whatever I really want to do. It’s just flexible enough that I can bullshit a job I want and take it, excluding present company. Usually I consult in England with the Globe Theatre and the Royal Shakespeare Company, I also guest lecture Shakespeare for younger audiences, like high schoolers and first years in college because I’m still young enough that I could be considered nerdy by a high schooler, but have college freshmen not be able to talk to me because I’m just good enough to get away with it.”

“What did you get your undergrad in?” Spencer spoke for the first time to you since you met him, you smiled a little bit. 

“No one really asks me that.” You looked over at Spencer. “I have a bachelors in Directing with minors in English Literature, French, and Classics, and then I went on and got my Masters in Art History, since the visual aspect of the Arts is what interests me so much.” 

Rossi nodded, “Makes sense considering I’ve seen your thesis–very impressive.” 

“What did you write about?” JJ looked over at you. 

“I–” You started but Rossi interrupted you. “Actually, if any of you had done any research, or were familiar with the Theatrical Arts, you would know that her thesis was an incredibly well-received production of Hamlet that delved into the female psyche and experience.” 

Your jaw dropped slightly. “I-I didn’t think you, any of you would have even known that. Let alone had time to go and see my production?”

“Well, I have a fondness for the arts.” 

You shook your head. “Or incredible timing.” 

“Wha–timing?” JJ scoffed. 

“Well,it’s— the program was in London, and it was only running for a few weeks…”

“Rossi when the hell did you go to London?” Derek finally spoke up, slightly captivated by you, but not in the way Reid was. You were something else, something completely new, which meant he could learn, and you were something he wanted to learn everything about. 

“Well, right before I rejoined the BAU, I did a lecturing series over at Scotland Yard, and everyone had been discussing this production by the youngest female director to ever direct at the Bridge Theatre. I loved your use of, what were they, silks?” 

You nodded, slightly embarrassed, mostly in awe. 

“Ah yes, your usage of silks and the columns. I was on the floor, part of the cattle that was moved around. Very innovative use of that space, very impressive.” 

“I’d have to agree.” Hotch spoke up, and you turned to look at him, eyes even wider than before. He smiled at the look on your face. “When we got this case, and we were requesting you as a consultant, I watched the recording. Very good work Y/n.”

“W-wow, um, thank you so much Age–Hotch. I really appreciate it–from the both of you.” You smiled at him and Rossi. 

“I would love to hear all about this production, if you don’t mind me asking.” Emily slid across the aisle, taking the seat across from you, JJ doing the same, crowding Derek. 

“Well, as Rossi said, it was about the female experience, and my Hamlet, was absolutely incredible, really took on the queer aspect of the role since Ophelia was still a woman, and–” You explained the concept, the design, the thought behind all of it. Every single person on the plane was simply obsessed with you by the time you were done, asking questions when they were curious. It confounded Spencer how he had never really paid attention to that section of the world of academia, and he was almost beating himself up over it, because he had missed you this whole time. 

-------------------------------------------------------------------

“Eyes look your last, Arms take your—this is Romeo’s death monologue before he stabs himself. And this other one, is ‘Be buried quick with her, and so will I’, which is Hamlet trying to fight Laertes after he learns of Ophelia’s death…And..this is the one from this morning ” You turned to the sheriff who was just trying to make sense of the fact that you just were able to comprehend and relay Shakespearean information after reading the images of the victim's blood used on the walls, so calmly. “Sheriff?”

“Sorry, yes. Yes” 

You frowned a bit, “They’re getting more violent. This is Brutus finding out Portia is dead–’with meditating that she must die once, I have the patience to endure it now…”

Reid looked over at you, “All of them are the men’s reactions to the death of their beloved.” 

You nodded and sighed. “That means, uh…If he has a list,” You walked over to the white board and started writing the names of the fictional couples on it. “He still has Antony and Cleopatra…Macbeth and Lady Macbeth,,,,and….”

“And what?” The sheriff looked between you and Reid, as you turned a little white. “The um. The last couple dealing with murder/suicide of each other is, uh, Othello.”

Hotch gave you a look. “Explain.” 

“What do you know about Othello?” 

Hotch furrowed his brow.

You took his silence as permission to ramble. “It’s just a theory but, it’s regarded as not only one of the most tragic endings to lovers, even beyond the stupid miscommunications of Romeo and Juliet, because Othello kills his wife, believing she had cheated on him, suffocating her to death on their marriage bed, and then once he realizes he’s been tricked by Iago, he kills himself next to her body. It’s horrendous.”

“If I had to guess, He’s forcing the husbands to kill their wives, and then he kills them..” Spencer followed up, analyzing the pictures across the tables. “Based on the way they were positioned—he’s setting them up as a series of muder-suicides, just like Shakespeare.” 

“Actually.” You picked up one of the pictures and handed it to Hotch. “I think it’s a woman.” 

“You just stole Reid’s line.” Derek mused from the doorway, handing you a cup of coffee, which you gratefully accepted. 

Reid huffed and rolled his eyes. “It’s not my line.” 

“It is.” Hotch said dryly as he analyzed what you had just told him. “Y/n, can you please get me a list of the monologues left, so we can try and figure out who might be his next victims, so we can try and link the victims we do have.” 

You nodded and sat down at your laptop. It was bugging you slightly at how much you enjoyed working on this case, working with the BAU, working with Doctor Reid. 

This was the most action your PhD had seen since you had written it. 

Part 2

[guilty-pleasures21]

Jason Todd submissive? Please I'm obsessed 😭🙏🏼 (I don't speak English, sorry Google translator JAKSKAKSKK)

— 🐏

Ahh! My first request! I tried my best based on what I understood of the assignment and I really hope you like it 😅!

Also, I speak French, a little bit of Spanish, Mandarin (though it's been ages! 🫠) and Punjabi, so don't worry about having to translate these if it's easier for you! Although I'm only comfortable writing in English, so I hope this is still all right!

Also, also, I know most writers on this site write in Y/N format, so you guys can just let me know if you prefer that format or 3rd person and I can change it accordingly.

Interrogation practise

I feel like Jason wouldn't let you try to dominate him, so you'd just have to try to trick him into it 😉.

Part 1 - the interrogation

Part 2 - the revenge

Part 3 - the roleplay

Warnings: bondage, explicit descriptions of sex (male x female).

----------------------------------------------------------

     She gave the knot a final tug, then looked up at him. “Is this okay?” 

     “That’s perfect, baby,” Jason assured her, shifting in position to get himself more comfortable. She stood up and moved to stand in front of him. She’d asked him to help her practise her interrogation techniques - she was always too soft when it came to questioning criminals and she wanted to learn how she could improve on her weaknesses. She’d tried asking some of the others before - Bruce, Cass, Dick - but they were all either too impatient or too violent for her tastes. And even though her boyfriend could be … a little hot-headed at times, he was always gentle when it came to her, helping her use her own unique talents to better improve her crime-fighting style. 

     “Okay, so, how should I start?” X asked him. Jason let his gaze trail over her body, his eyes lingering a little too long on her tanned and tone legs, bare beneath her little shorts. He dragged his gaze back up to hers, trying not to think about how very helpless he was right now, tied up to this chair in front of his pretty little girlfriend, just waiting to torture him. He shook the thought away.

     “So, you want to start gentle,” he coached her patiently. “People are already scared of the big old Bat, right? So you want to convince them that it’s better for them to talk to you instead.” She nodded in understanding.

“Okay, so … What should I be trying to get out of you in this situation? Give me a storyline.” He smirked, amused by how seriously she was taking the situation. She was so cute, his sweet little girlfriend. 

     “Hmm … Maybe you could be trying to find out where the Riddler’s hideout is?” Jason suggested. “I could pretend to be one of his goons.”

     “Okay,” she agreed. She cleared her throat, taking a moment to get into character, then raised her head again, clasping her hands behind her back and strolling over to him. “Look. You and I both know things are going to get a lot more … unpleasant when my boss gets here. So, why don’t we help each other out?” 

     She placed her hands on the back of his chair, bending over so that her lips were just a breath apart from his. “You tell me where the Riddler’s hiding and I’ll make sure the Batman goes easy on you.” 

     Jason’s lips curled at the ends as he appraised her and he raised an eyebrow in challenge. “Oh, sweetheart. You’re going to have to do a lot better than that to convince me.” 

     “Hmm,” X considered, her dark eyes trailing down his face and landing on his lips. “What would you like me to do for you, Mr Todd?” 

     F*ck. This was a bad idea. Why had he agreed to this? Oh, right: because she’d given him that pretty little look of innocence that drove him mad whenever he saw it, her dark and curly eyelashes fluttering up at him, her full and rosy lips twisted down in a pout. But shit, they’d barely started and he was already regretting his decision. He should have made them do it the other way around instead; he should have tied her up to his bed while he ‘demonstrated’ the proper technique to her. She dragged a finger down his chest, her eyes following the path she made along his hard muscles. 

     “What would it take …” she slid her legs on top of his, settling herself in his lap, “... for you to tell me where the Riddler is hiding?” She wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned forward, her breath tickling his ear as she murmured into it. 

     “Hmm? 'Sweetheart'?” His head fell back with pleasure as she chuckled at her own words before nipping playfully at his ear.

     “Ah, f*ck!” Jason shifted in position, struggling against his binds so he could free his hands and run them all over her deliciously bare thighs. God, she was hot. X straightened and moved one hand to cup his face, her lips so close to his, but still so painfully far.

     “Why won’t you tell me, Jace?” she whined, pouting at him pleadingly. Then her lips twisted into a grin and she dragged her thumb across his lip before beginning her mouth to his. “You know what I’ll do for you if you do.” 

     He leaned forward, meaning to kiss her, to close the distance between them and lick up the sweet taste of her. But she pulled away again and he growled in response. “X!”

     X giggled and stood up, curling her fingers around his shoulder and moving to stand behind him. 

     “This is an interrogation, Jason,” she reminded him, bending over and sliding her hands down his chest appreciatively. He was so hot, her big and strong boyfriend. “You’ll get what you want when I say you get it.” She nipped at his ear again and he sighed, wriggling his legs to try to free his ankles from their binds. She pressed her lips to his neck, the soft moans escaping from her throat driving him crazy as she made her way down to his shoulder. 

     “Mmm, Jason,” she mumbled, her voice low and seductive in his ear. She straightened, her hands returning to his shoulders as she stood over him. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to maintain his self-control - and his control over the situation he’d landed himself in. 

     “Princess,” he called to her, his tone sweet, lazy - like he was the one still in charge. “Why don’t you untie me and we’ll see what we can work out?” She pursed her lips, pretending to think about it as she moved to stand in front of him again. 

     “Hmm, I don’t know,” she admitted, grabbing his shoulders again and bending over him, her dark hair falling forward to frame her sweet face. “I’m having much more fun trying to work things out like this.” 

     Her eyes fell to his chest, to the sharp lines of his muscles pressing against the soft fabric of his shirt as he sat there, hands bound behind his back as he looked up at her. “It’s too bad you still have your clothes on though - we could have had so much more fun if you’d taken them off first.” 

     He sighed and let out another curse as she shot him a wicked smile. Then he watched as she turned around and went over to the kitchen, grabbing a knife before making her way back over to him. His heart started picking up its pace in his chest and he couldn’t decide whether he was terrified or thrilled by the idea of what she was about to do next. “Princess.” 

     She ignored him as she walked back over to him, her steps slow and precise. Then she grabbed the collar of his shirt and traced her knife over the soft fabric before slicing it down the centre. She stood back and licked her lips at the sight of his bare chest, setting her knife aside before climbing back on top of his lap. 

     “Mmm, Mr Todd!” she chuckled, running her hands down his chest and leaning forward to bring her lips to his ear. “Looks like the Riddler’s got his men working on an extensive exercise routine.” She curled her fingers around the waistband of his pants, wriggling back a little to give her hands more room, and he felt his body start to heat up in anticipation. 

     “Does he have a gym? At this secret hideout of his?” She traced her fingers over the outline of his cock, already starting to harden in his sweatpants, and let out another little laugh. “Maybe you could take me there sometime. How about that?” She nibbled on his neck as she slid her hand into his underwear and wrapped her fingers around his cock, sliding them up and down teasingly. 

     “F*ck,” Jason groaned, his head falling forward at the sensation. X pulled back to look at him, brushing her thumb across his bottom lip. 

     “What’s wrong, Mr Todd?” she asked him, delighted to finally have the upper hand over him. “Still not convincing enough for you?” She lowered her lips to his, but continued to dodge his attempts to kiss her, chuckling when he groaned in frustration. Then she leaned forward to pull his lip between hers and sucked on it before letting him go again.

     “Ah, shit!” Jason exclaimed, his breaths getting heavier as he started to become more aroused. He let out a choked gasp as she brushed her thumb over his tip and began circling it gently. “X. Don’t … Stop it, sweetheart.”  

     “You want me to stop?” She shook her head at the thought, lips still curled into that devious smile. “Don’t you remember what I said, Jace?” 

     She brought her face back to his, smirking at him in the way he’d always smirk at her when he was teasing her, pushing her to the very limits as he played with and pleasured her. “I’m in charge tonight.” 

     His head fell back against the seat as she continued twirling her slender fingers around his cock. He should never have agreed to this; he should have known the moment she’d asked him to help her out, that mischievous glint sparkling in her eyes as she'd gazed up at him. Had she planned this all along? Had she wanted to tie him up just so she’d be able to dominate him for a change? Dominate him in the way he’d always dominate her? X frowned, feigning confusion as she looked down at the frustrated crease between his brows. 

     “You’re feeling a little dry, Jace,” she informed him, removing her hand from around his c*ck and pushing herself off of him. He swallowed hard as she lowered herself to her knees and pulled his pants down, licking her lips hungrily at the sight of his cock exposed before her. “Let’s see what we can do about that, hmm?”

     “X, don’t … This isn’t how an interrogation works, sweetheart,” he informed her, trying to keep his tone gentle so she wouldn’t be tempted to challenge him. She glanced up at him quickly, then fixed her gaze back on his cock, her eyes lighting up with delight. 

     “Hmm?” she mumbled, reaching forward to grab hold of his dick. “I’m just trying to use my strengths, Jay. Like you always tell me to do?” She turned her face up to his, grinning at the feeling of his cock throbbing in her hand. Then she leaned forward and dragged her tongue across his tip, licking him up slowly. He bit down on his tongue, trying to stop a groan from falling out at the sensation. He could do this: he’d been in much, much worse situations before and he hadn’t cracked then. There was no way he was going to give her the pleasure - the satisfaction - of knowing that she was the only one capable of breaking the unbreakable Jason Todd. No way in hell was he going to let her have this! But then she wound her tongue around his shaft, closing her mouth around him and letting out a low moan that danced along his skin. F*ck. He pressed his lips together, barely muffling the groan that managed to escape his throat. 

     “X, don’t … don’t …” he panted heavily, struggling against his binds as she continued sucking his cock, her pretty little mouth taking him in so nicely. She pulled her head back slowly, dragging him out of her mouth, then lowered her lips to his balls, her fingers continuing to work on his tip as she suckled on him gently. 

     “Don’t what, Mr Todd? Are you not enjoying this?” She licked one of his balls, curling her tongue around it before pulling it into her mouth to suck on it. 

     He was definitely not enjoying this - not at all! He was the one who was supposed to be dominating her; throwing her around and teasing her until she was begging him for relief, her perfect little breasts bouncing up and down as he brought her to the edge of her pleasure and back down again. He never hurt her, of course - never forced into anything she wasn’t comfortable with. But it was just one of the only times he finally felt in control of something in his life and he was f*cked if she found out how so very aroused he was right now. 

     She chuckled, knowing exactly how much he was enjoying it - and exactly how much he was hating the fact. She’d wanted to try it, just once, but she knew her boyfriend would never have agreed to something like this, proud as he could be. So, she’d devised this clever plan, playing into his ego to make him think that she was just so innocent and so desperate for his help. She pulled his dick back into her mouth, moaning against his tip when it hit the back of her throat before letting him go again. Then she stood up. 

     “Okay. You’ve had your fun,” Jason relented, the muscles in his shoulders flexing deliciously as he pulled against his binds again. “Now untie me, X.” She rearranged her features into that innocent expression that drove him crazy every time she used it on him. 

     “But you still haven’t told me where the Riddler’s hideout is,” she pointed out, eyes wide as she waited for his response. He huffed in irritation, his chest heaving up and down as he glared at her. He looked so hot like this, jaw clenched in anger, strands of his dark hair falling into his mossy eyes. There was no way she was going to let him go so easily - not until she was completely done having her fun! He kept his mouth shut and she shrugged. “If that’s how you want to play.” 

     X started taking her clothes off, taking her sweet time removing each piece of clothing and dropping them into his lap. She smirked when she saw his Adam’s apple bob up and down and her eyes fell back down to his cock, the tip glistening now with the prec*m starting to leak out of it. She slid her hands up her abdomen and squeezed her breasts when she reached them, her body entirely bare before him now. 

     “What’s wrong, Jay? Are you gonna come all over my clothes?” She blinked at him sweetly, feigning innocence before bending over to murmur in his ear. “Why would you do that when my pretty little p*ssy is already waiting for you to fill it up?”

He let out a choked gasp at her words. “F*ck!”

She straightened and giggled at the thunderous expression on his face, his thick brows crashing together over his darkened eyes. Then she flicked her hair over her shoulder and straddled him again, wriggling her body against his as she ground her hips into his slowly.

     “F*****ck,” he groaned into her neck, his dick so painfully hard for her. “Shit, baby. Faster. I need you. Now.” She twisted her fingers into his hair and pulled his head back, forcing him to look up at her again. 

     “You just don’t listen, do you, Jason?” She flicked her tongue out, licking his lips before giggling and tugging on the skin of his neck with her teeth. “We should do something about that.” She slid her hands down his hard chest, pressing quick kisses down his neck before licking a stripe back up to his ear. 

     “Shit, baby. Anything. I’ll do anything you want me to.” He began thrusting his hips against hers, desperate for relief. “You want me to tell you where the Riddler’s hideout is? I’ll tell you. Gotham … museum … or whatever.” Had they agreed on a location? He couldn’t remember. And he didn’t really care, either way - all he needed was her, her tight little p*ssy clenching around his dick, her warm and wet walls squeezing him tight as he unloaded himself inside of her. She giggled as she bounced up and down on his lap, clearly delighted by how desperate he was for her. Then she took hold of his chin, tilting his face up to hers so she could look him in the eyes. 

     “Really? You’re not just lying to me so I’ll give you what you want?” Jason shook his head quickly, doing his best to focus on what she was saying. But f*ck, she felt good, her p*ssy already dripping for him as she waited for him to fill her up.

     “No!” he reassured her. “I promise. I … Shit. Please, X. Please, sweetheart, I’ll … F*****ck.” His head fell forward as she stopped her movements, his dick pulsing and throbbing with desire. Then finally, she reached down to take hold of his cock, sliding it through her already drenched folds in preparation. He suck in a breath at the feeling of her warm and sticky c*m, then let out a grunt as she started easing him inside of her, his hips thrusting into hers as his body begged him for relief. 

     “Slow down, Jay!” she laughed. “You wanted to hold out against me, right? You didn’t want to give me what I wanted?” She grabbed his hair again and pulled his head back so he was forced to look up at her, at the wicked curl of her lips.

     “And I asked you so nicely, too!” she continued, letting go of him and lowering her lips to his. “Should I wait? Should I just stop and wait for the Batman to come and deal with you?”

     “F*ck, no! Don’t … Shit.” She wouldn’t actually stop, would she? Not when he was already halfway inside of her? “I’ll tell you. I’ll tell you anything you want to know, baby. Please, just …”

     He lowered his head to her shoulder, brushing his lips along her neck and murmuring against her skin. “Come on, sweetheart. Please? I’ll give you anything you want, baby.” 

     “Hmm, anything?” she asked him, her body tingling at the low rumble of his voice, at the way his thick cock filled her up so very nicely. She held his head in her hands, guiding his mouth to her breast as she ground herself into him, her p*ssy pulling him deeper inside of her with every roll of her hips. She shivered as he closed his lips around her nipple, dragging his tongue around it and suckling on it in just the way he knew she liked. “Mmm, shit, Jay.” 

     She moaned at the way he licked and sucked on her breasts, his cock brushing up against her walls every time she moved. She slid her fingers into his hair and tugged on the strands, pulling his head back again to see that dazed look on his face again. Her nipples tingled at the way his eyes had glazed over from pleasure, his pupils so wide now that the beautiful green of his irises had disappeared almost entirely. She giggled at the sight, then pressed her lips to his, moaning into his mouth as she kissed him deeply. He raised his hips to thrust himself into her repeatedly, his dick hitting that one spot that had her curling over in ecstasy. And then she hit her breaking point, her body shuddering and shaking against him as she came. She gripped onto his shoulders, trying to maintain her balance as her p*ssy pulsed around his dick, clenching it tight and begging for him to fill her up. His hips stuttered as his c*m gushed into her, the warm and sticky liquid shooting into her vagina and leaking back out again. X whimpered at the feeling, curling herself around him and burying her face in his neck as he unloaded himself inside of her. Then finally, he leaned back against his seat, the tension leaving his body as he finally got his release. 

     “We … are never doing that again,” Jason panted warningly, his green eyes boring into her as she straightened. His eyes fell to her breasts as she tried to catch her breath, the beautiful mounds glistening with sweat just waiting for him to lick away. 

     “In that case … I guess I’d better take advantage … of right now,” she joked, delighting in the way his dick was still buried inside of her. Jason growled, baring his teeth at her in a snarl. 

     “X. Untie me - right now,” he demanded, not playing around anymore. X sighed and got up off of him, her body protesting at the sudden emptiness inside of her. She knelt down to undo the ties around his ankles, then moved to take care of the one binding his wrists together. He jumped up as soon as he was free, shrugging his shirt and pants off before grabbing her and lifting her up in his arms.      

“Just you wait, sweetheart,” he growled in her ear, carrying her over to his bedroom. “It’s my turn now: and I don’t care if it takes me the entire night to get what I want from you.”

[grif-hawaiian-rolls]

Random Chorus headcanons i wanna write out so i dont forget em, part 1:

-The average height of chorusans is on the shorter side of human average height- you have more people who are under 5’8 than over, and very few people who are 6ft or more

- the height skew is partially because of the gravity on chorus being slightly different from earth, not really enough to be Noticed especially in an age where artificial gravity and space travel are common but Enough to cause a slight leaning in the graphs of averages (chorusans also tend to be stronger than your average human from earth because of this too! Little wins)

-its also due to the food and nutrients available to the isolated colony at war with itself like thats a given. The people of chorus aren’t malnourished, mind, but the exact ratios of certain vitamins and proteins and shit weren’t in their “ideals” the way they would be for a more regulated inner colony or a even an outer colony with more consistent imports

-Andersmith is an outlier at a solid 6ft tall, and he knows this, and its part of why he works so hard to be Eloquent and Well Spoken, bc its hard for people to dismiss you as the dumb muscle when you talk like you have three degrees in literature (his in-progress history degree that got interrupted and put on hold when he joined the New Republic is Not related to this, he’s just Like That)

-The age range in the Federal Army of Chorus is a good 5-6 years older than the range in the New Republic— shocker, the rebels are the teenagers and young adults fed up with the existing system and challenging it while even the more sympathetic feds are older and working within the system to the best they can

-again, outliers are a thing but broad strokes, broad strokes

-the Federal Army has a ridiculous categorizing system and requisition forms for everything. Yes those two fed in s13 were being assholes to Kimball about it to bc they didnt have any respect for her, but it is a genuine thing (theres normally just the understanding of doing the paperwork later when a commanding officer snaps at you. They weren’t treating her like a commanding officer) Simmons would have drooled if he had seen it I think. It’s color coordinated!

-Lopez was the only one of the reds and blues who actually learned this system. Donut, Sarge and Wash all kinda half assed it and got either Lopez or one of the Feds they worked with to do the actual paperwork for stuff…. which is to say, Anton and Lopez did the paperwork, and Neko sat with them and translated Lopez’s spanish into english when he felt like it (the armory got really good at figuring out what the spanish words for certain weapons and munition were because Neko is half assed as a translator at best)

-theres actually a decent number of non-native english speakers on Chorus! The number of them that have spanish as their first language is… laughably small. Lopez cannot catch a break, sorry buddy

-French is one of the more common native languages, along side English! Followed by Italian and then Portuguese and Mandarin Chinese (theyre tied)

-Chorus has an insane pizza scene post civil war. Second only to the pastry culture. Grif would singlehandedly fund them both if he could. He certainly tries

-MRE and field rations like jerky are still pretty stable foods regardless of culinary exploits, because it’s both easy and familiar. Its gonna take a while for Chorus to get back on its feet in terms of self sufficient farming again, but honestly having access to the alien temples now really really helps

-Chorus adopts a bit more Sangheili/Forerunner culture than most human colonies because of said temples, and bc Santa is straight up helping them rebuild their government with President Kimball— plus as they are technically neutral, not part of the UNSC/UEC/whatever the fuck its called, they have a bit more freedom in how they deal with aliens diplomatically and politically (Tucker hates his job as a human-sangheili diplomat so much. He’s supposed to be retired damn it) (the alternative is leaving it to Santa alone though, so Tucker does it and just whines about it in true Tucker fashion)

-I’m a firm believer in Chorus having WACK wildlife, but also i think its funniest if its also like, a lot closer to earth than you’d expect??? Theres still like spider wasps that both bite and sting with a venom that paralyzes your lungs and you slowly suffocate to death— but their natural predator is just… a normal fucking bird. It looks like a big ass pigeon with gills, so the lung paralyzer doesn’t work on it or some shit idk

-SANTA’S TEMPLES ARENT THE ONLY ONES - look. Look. Hear me out. Santa’s true warrior temple system isnt alone, it just survived the best. Thats why it has such a weird range from like the PURGE to just Long Distance Call to Everyone to Interior Decorating. There were other temples that required a different “test” like the Gateway to gain access to them. The Great Key is still the skeleton key to all of them but not all of them demand a True Warrior of Strength and Clarity. Most of them are hella busted tho; and didn’t survive the tests of time but that just means theyre more prone to Shenanigans if you do find and trigger them

-Santa is hella integrated into a lot of Chorus’ tech. It wasn’t super intentional, honestly, but a lot of what they’re working with otherwise is outdated, gerry-rigged and field stripped to hell and back. Santa’s set up get referenced because it is the best maintained form of accessible (when he’s feeling generous enough to share blueprints and not annoyed with being roped into things that are Not His Job) tech to build off of as theyre repairing and updating infrastructure, and that overlap in how it works means he can really easily access a lot of stuff! Which would be concerning! If he cared. But he doesn’t so, no one has bothered to figure out a work around

-there’s also a lot of coding and programs that read and sound like Epsilon’s work because… a lot of them are? Theyre based on shit he left behind, both intentionally and on accident (look he meant to delete that one code but he just didn’t get around to it okay? He has other shit going on) and again even the ones that aren’t Epsilon’s doing, theyre built by chorusans to communicate with his and are often based off of his as a reference for how to make it work, so he’s part of Chorus now too in a way that’s really bitter sweet! He left behind more of a legacy than he ever realized

[ego-meliorem-esse]

Do you hc America to speak other languages or is he a fully English bimbo? To my knowledge, NASA requires Russian fluency, I don't think many other US-government level agencies require another language but I could be wrong. I know Spanish translations of official documents are increasingly accessible but English is still the de facto language.

What I will say is that the notion that Alfred, as a superpower in the modern age, does not speaks several languages is absurd to me.

The languages i hc him to know, besides English, are:

Spanish - first and foremost. Though Alfred does have more of a Mexican dialect when speaking Spanish, which slightly annoys Antonio. As it should.

German - very good at it! Gets the accent almost perfect. For Alfred, German was one of those easier languages he learned. With most nations, Alfred speaks English. And not really because he doesn't want to or try to speak their language, but mostly because it's rare that other nations expect this dude to speak their native languages. Not with Gil tho! Their conversations are full of German-centric memes. Alfred is a big fan of Mitten im Leben. Unapologetically so! He knows enough German to understand the shitty acting in the show.

Mandarin - this on is very straight forward, it's good business. He uses it too much for diplomatic purposes to find joy and interest in speaking it. Sad really, as its a fascinating language.

Russian - also very straightforward, he works at NASA for commissions and contracts and its very common to speak it. Even besides that, the Cold War required it as well. His Spotify playlists are full of post communist songs of Russian, Polish, Yugoslav origins but he'll die before show it to anyone.

Japanese - He stutters and takes his time when speaking Japanese. He learned it but rarely uses it nowadays.

Korean - man, he tries. It's a relatively new language under Alfreds belt. But his problem is that he sounds very flat when speaking Korean. Nowadays he uses it more than Japanese though!

French - oh this is a very fun one for me to get into. Contrary to popular headcanoning, I hc him to struggle with it. He does understand most of verbal French, but as a child he started learning it and at that point he wasn't really all that interested in other languages. He had other shit keep his focus. So, while he did hear a large amount of it growing up, he had few attempts to speak it himself. Even during the American revolution, when he made his way across the pond to woo his french patrons, he was mostly spoken to in English. In their minds he was not very cultured. A mixed race country bumpkin putting his big boy pants on for the first time. As annoying that was for Alfred, he had other shit to worry about. And Matt rarely spoke French when living with Al and Arthur so there wasn't really an opportunity there for Alfred. This is one language that he is constantly passively learning, which is hilarious bc it's one of the first ones he should have known lol. I get that this is a very niche hc and makes little sense but i find joy in it. And also in François' frustration.

Plus a limited knowledge of other languages. Alfred is trying to make time to learn more languages, but finding time for it is a challenge.

I'll expand on Alfreds knowledge of both specific classifications of Algonquian and Iroquois languages in a later post.

All that said, Alfred is, in heart and soul, an "English bimbo" 🙏

[omniglitch-au]

For the original 10, which languages on Earth would you most like to learn. And if you know another language besides English, what are they?

"I already know a bunch! Pretty useful for sea rescues in international waters and prank calls, hehe. But I'd really like to learn Māori at some point! Their culture's pretty neat."

"You ask that as if we did not have access to universal translators. And as if I am not already fluid in every single language spoken on planet Earth."

"I am pretty fluent in Spanish, French and German. I'd like to learn Mandarin Chinese as well, since it's the second most spoken language on Earth."

"Rath taught me a bit of Spanish. I ain't really interested in learning anything else. I got my nerd-siblings for that."

"I speak Latin pretty well. It allows me to read some of my books in their original form. I've been thinking about learning Korean and Italian as well."

"I speak English really good!"

"I made Rath teach me Spanish. Fellas and girls love a guy who speaks Spanish!"

"I'm actually fluent in Japanese! But I don't really have the desire to learn any other languages right now."

"I tried learning Klingon, but all that memorizing and wading through text just isn't for me."

"*Happy barking*"

((It seems like Wildmutt has no idea what this is about. He's just happy to be here.))

[notriverforkdemongirl]

Intro as to who I am and what I like.

I’m under 30, bi and perchance a demigirl. Perchance.

I use she/they pronouns but I don't really care so like. Just call me whatever. As for my name You may call me kilometre.

Im either gonna be a director or a detective. Detective bc I think I could be really good at solving clues or director bc I cant handle how little movies abt the batfam there is and I could be so much better than *ahem* sack znyder.

I love dogs, cats, sharks, and like literally every other animal except dolphins.

My favourite dog is my dog's who are my favourite puppies ever I love them so much, my favourite cat is my cat even tho she tries to maul me and my favourite shark is all of them.

My favourite superhero is spoiler, with batman in a close second and the rest of the batfam in third with the supers in fourth.

My favourite movies are Into The Spiderverse, Across The Spiderverse, The Amazing Spiderman 2, and Under The Red Hood.

My favourite tv shows are xmen 97, ultimate spiderman, arcane, batman beyond and like every dc TV show ever.

I like PJO and have read all the books (except for the magnus Chase books- I'm in a reading slump)

I have so many ideas for art but I suck at it so they never come into fruition but I'm kinda alright at writing so there's that. But I am trying to do like simple drawings so pls don't judge my horrendous drawings I'm trying ok

My favourite colours are light pink and dark red.

Im currently rewatching Titans, Young Justice, and Arcane.

Im learning German, French, Spanish, and Mandarin all at the same time but im very bad at all of them.

Please recommend any and all media I could consume (even tho I already have a long list of media to consume)

I hate Devin Grayson with a passion so please dni if u support her and her work.

Also I love mushrooms and my favourite country is not America.

I really really love DC and Dan mora's comics and my fav robins are Jason, Steph, and Maps :D

Also my bestie is @stargazinglesbian go follow them rn

And to finish it off heres a photo of me

[lemonthepotato]

Narratives Schools Teach Us About Language Learning That I Dislike

Maybe this is rich for a monolingual to say, but I hate this narrative we’re told growing up that English speakers are just “lazy” when it comes to learning other languages. It’s a lie, and honestly, I think it just blatantly ignores the reasoning why English is so widely learned… cough, colonialism. The school system? Not wanting to teach us things that might us uncomfortable or break the historical narratives? Never heard of that before. Sarcasm.

No, other countries aren’t just super intelligent compared to English natives (I find intelligence narratives in general rooted in… many things). The reason why someone living in Wales might not speak fluent Italian is the same reason why someone living in Japan probably doesn’t speak fluent English, why would they? Well, also the fact English education in Japan is the equivalent of Spanish education in American classrooms… not very good, but mainly the lack of a need to speak it.

And that’s not laziness, it’s that the human brain is wired to go with the more practical options, the ‘easy’ ways. This is why I believe motivation to be a myth, something I have been reminding myself recently as I go through a pretty fucking difficult time in my life. Motivation isn’t something you strive for in order to be productive, it’s something that makes you want to be productive. Does that make sense? Motivation is the reason we do things, it can’t be forced.

It’s not lazy for someone living in America to not know fluent French… because they don’t live in France, so the chances that they’ll need to speak French, unless they’re living in certain parts of Maine or Vermont or something, are low. The same is true for other countries.

I don’t think language learning should be shamed into people. From a young age, it’s driven into us that the lack of proficiency is our fault, not the system’s, based on a lack of discipline. My high school forced us to take two language courses, and sometimes you wouldn’t even end up where you wanted regarding that.

I feel like this narrative just further discourages people from learning other languages- you’re not “skilled” enough. If you don’t have the time to learn it, you’re just not “motivated” enough. Let’s ignore the fact that unless your only hobby is being a polyglot (based tho) you have other shit to attend to- you’re just “lazy.”

I think the easiest language for someone to learn is the one you can immerse yourself in easiest. After putting myself through two weeks of nothing but Japanese content with minimal grammar study, I also think ‘immersion’ is overhyped. I think “you’re not immersing enough” is the new form of shaming, honestly. But I’ve learned from my mistakes, so I’m learning about Spanish grammar before I immerse. Spanish? Yes, I’ve switched to Spanish. Why? Well, growing up I tried learning many languages, and ended up giving up and throwing 5 years into lazily ‘learning’ Esperanto. Didn’t really work, I could form sentences but vocabulary was lacking and relied on google translate. I truly believe duolingo doesn’t work, even for ‘easy’ languages.

But, anyway, I felt shame for the fact I couldn’t learn a ‘harder’ language. But you know what? Don’t let anyone shame you out of learning an “easy” language. I wanted to learn Japanese and French too because I felt like I would’ve been too lazy or basic learning Spanish, but let me tell you, there is nothing wrong with learning an “easy” language. I don’t even believe there are languages “easy” for English speakers based on objective difficulty.

I think it’s about how much you can expose yourself to the language more so, though, yeah, obviously an English speaker will struggle more with learning Mandarin Chinese than French. But like. I think having a “beginner” language that you learn is perfectly fine. You’re learning a language and that’s okay. And also, don’t let people do the opposite either, and shame you out of learning a “harder” or even more obscure language. Just do what works for you.

I’m focusing more on Spanish because it’s easier to expose myself to; that’s all. Sure, learning Japanese sounds like fun, but it’s not practical. I think it’s okay to look at a language, study it a bit, but not aim for total fluency. I think you can appreciate a language without focusing so much on the end goal. Yeah, sure, if you want to learn Frisian (a language pretty close to English, so probably ‘easier’) but you think you’ll get more coolness points for learning Korean… you can do that. But you don’t have to start now. You can look at a language and think “I like this. I’ll study this from time to time. I appreciate this language” without feeling like a failure for not understanding it.

This goes for non-native English speakers, by the way, or people who speak very different languages than English. You’re not a failure for not understanding it. I also think there’s a discussion to be had about the opposite; shaming people for NOT speaking English. I’ve actually heard stories of people going to Japan and being upset that they can’t communicate with Japanese people. Yeah, uh, you’re in JAPAN? What are you expecting?

So, fuck it, I don’t care if learning Spanish will make me “basic.” Not everyone has to be a hyperpolyglot and there seems to be a weird internet measuring contest of who can learn the most languages. Also, I find it really funny when people assume I can speak Irish because I’m Irish. It’s actually very hard to learn Irish unless you live in very specific parts of Ireland, trust me.

What the fuck was I even talking about again? I went on a tangent about how I was basically like a weeb but for American culture growing up and then deleted it. Try growing up on the internet and not developing a half-American half-Irish accent. Btw despite people telling me that, I was never really aware I had an Irish accent. I used to not really care about my culture growing up, honestly, especially since I’m detached from it, but I kinda like being Irish, now. Will I ever learn Irish, though? PFFT. No. Irish class in high school KILLED my motivation because not only did I want to learn Spanish & French but got stuck in the Spanish & Irish classes, but I’m convinced that language teachers don’t even know or care about the languages they’re teaching.

Anyway, I swear I had a point with this post… see, sometimes I want to make well-structured essays on this app, but I’m just too incoherent, man. Oh, speaking of languages, considering Co09 the flip side came out and sucked, it made me curious if there was any Spanish fandubs of the original games. And you know what? There was a trailer for one a year ago, but it has like, 1,000 views, which sucks! Oh, yeah, another reason why I want to focus on Spanish > Japanese is that a lot more media I like is available in Spanish than Japanese. Also, Spanish has, like, an easier barrier of entry? Japanese has kanji.

You know, a lot of people shit on kanji, but I think I can acknowledge “it makes things 10x harder for me, but that’s okay.” Like, for me, the thing with kanji isn’t even the amount of kanji, it’s how many strokes some kanji have! I have poor eyesight 😭 at the same time, though, removing kanji from Japanese is like… I think it would get confusing fast because from what I’ve heard, it’s like, uh, okay, what’s a metaphor I can use? Imagine removing contractions from English but if 80% of English was contracted. Actually, avoiding using contractions was something I did as a young teen… for some reason. I just felt a need to speak “proper” or else I was bad or improper. But it’s just awkward. Sorry, “it is” just awkward.

Another thing- I’ve kinda grown to hate Esperanto. It’s really hard to immerse yourself in a conlang, and honestly, I should’ve just spent those 5 years learning Spanish instead of losing confidence. If you’re going to learn a language that’s very similar to English, kinda easier for an English speaker, why not learn the one that’s actually practical? Also, I know I said language learning shouldn’t be about impressing people, but I just- I don’t even like Esperanto anymore! I’m kinda embarrassed about it, frankly. It’s not even a good auxlang. Though, I will say, people who say Toki Pona is better as an auxlang are kinda funny. Imagine you’re in a burning building and trying to communicate with your Spanish friend in Toki Pona. You’d spend more time thinking about how to say “fire!” than running out the building. So, honestly, I think Esperanto is better in that regard, but I think Toki Pona is a better language because it accomplished its goal. To be fair, though, I think Esperanto kinda gets an unfair rep. Like, yeah, it didn’t age the best, but back then, there wasn’t really any social media, Zamenhof was polish, so it’s not like he could make the perfect auxlang with all languages considered. Nowadays, if you want to know more about a language, you can just use google. Back then, Wikipedia didn’t really exist.

Also, really depressing fact about Esperanto is that people were killed in WW2 for speaking Esperanto. I wonder how much of Esperanto’s lack of success has to do with the historical repression/censorship of the language. To be honest, I don’t even know if it’s possible to make a “good” universal auxlang.

But honestly, I find the fact English is such a widely spoken language more depressing than anything. So many non-natives learn English because it’s inescapable.

The moral of the story is that if you speak another language and want me to learn it, just refuse to speak English to me. The social pressure will be too embarrassing and I will buy 10 Swedish textbooks or Bengali or Serbian. Okay, I have no idea why those were the first three languages I thought of.

Anyway, I hope nothing in this post comes off the wrong way. Overall, I think that people being colonised into learning English, and then the education system putting individual blame onto English young children for not being “smart” or “motivated” enough to learn a foreign language, is, er… definitely problematic. I also think it’s bullshit to get mad at foreign people for not knowing English, too, obviously. Just like, be chill, god damn. Language learning should be done out of a genuine desire to learn a language.

[hughiecampbelle]

Being the Smartest Roy Would Include:

A/N: Loosely based off this Peaky Blinders headcanon I wrote ages ago. I love writing baby Roy!Sibling :)

Logan takes all the credit, of course

You were smart even as a baby

You playing consisted of matching colors and shapes, counting, naming all the right animals. You were speaking and walking and talking at such early rates, too. It was impossible not to notice or compare to your siblings

Your mother, the woman between Caroline and Marcia, brought you to doctors, unsure of what to do. Of course, they'd have to wait for you to get older to test your IQ, but there was a lot of good news. You were excelling at a rapid rate

You were given tutors young since you surpassed your peers with the smallest bit of effort. You were bored in your classes with your peers, so much so that you skipped a few grades a few times. By the time you were 8 you were already in a 5th grade class, 13 by the time you graduate High School . You were graduated from an Ivy League by the time you're 18 years old

Kendall was more than happy helping you with your homework, even if it was mostly pretend help with silly questions you got wrong on purpose

"Does that make sense?"

"Yup, thank you Ken."

His smile made it all worth it - even if you had to erase and fix his work after he left

Your language tutors taught you Mandarin, French, Italian, German, Spanish, and Russian. Languages are your favorite thing to learn. Your father is very proud when you can talk to investors, no matter how young you are, in their mother tongue

You like teaching your siblings as well

Shiv listens to you, go on and on about the different cases and grammar, and fun words you can teach her even if she's only half listening

"Do you wanna know how to say cat?"

"Sure."

"Gatta."

"Cool."

Despite your sister's tone, she really was proud of you. You worked hard, and you deserved all this recognition. Besides, you're something of a secret weapon for the family

Roman uses you as his own personal Siri. He asks you things you know, things he thinks you should know, any genius should know

"The meaning of life is complicated. . ."

"What good are you?"

Connor is in awe of you. He never really had the focus for school. It was never his thing, but you amaze him. He'd been reading to you since you were a baby. At first those playful baby books, but as you grew, the books got thicker and thicker until you wanted him to read War and Peace. He eventually had to give up, letting you read it on your own

"How many pages do you have left?"

"300. I'll be finished in an hour."

The older you grow, the more you realize your intelligence has saved you from your fathers wrath, especially when you compare your childhoods. You were never hit or slapped, Logan always treated you like an equal, or at least as close to an equal as he could manage. That created some issues in itself. . .

You were seven and already aware of the amount of money your father had, was making and losing, etc. Poor deals would keep you up at night, worried you'd lose everything and your father would blame you. Gently, you'd have to tell him not to take it, not wanting to make him mad. It was too much stress for a child

Connor tried his best to let you have a childhood. He took you and the rest camping, to the park, the playground. He took you out for ice cream on the weekend and played with real toys, not the educational kind, between classes and tutors. You could turn off your brain with him and just be a kid. It wasn't often that you got to

Being the youngest and the smartest creates some rifts between you and your brothers and sister

You know Kendall is named successor, but you have an awful feeling your father will take it back and give the title to you

You didn't want to run the company, you'd had too much say in it already. You were practically your fathers advisor from the time you were six. If anything, when he retired, you wanted to retire too

You wouldn't dare tell Logan this, of course

He'd call you lazy, stupid, question your intelligence and drive. That was your worst fear, was letting him down, like the rest of your siblings

You fear the only reason he even stands you is because of your mind, your brain, that if you had been born with an average intelligence he would want nothing to do with you

One night you ask your sister this, who tries her best to gently let you down

"Just be grateful you're as smart as you are, okay?"

Roman calls has you as "Baby Genius" in his phone

He has been working your entire life to make as many jokes as possible about your intelligence. You never get tired of them though, instead coming up with comebacks just as quickly

"Give it a break, Poindexter."

"At least I'm capable of chewing gum and walking at the same time, idiot."

He treats you like a person, which is all you've ever wanted. You never wanted special attention or treatment because you're so smart, you just want to be treated like normal

Your father, of course, wouldn't dare. He doesn't want to waste your time, your intelligence. You were born this way for a reason, and he will not put it to waste. He expects more from you

It's exhausting. Not just because your brain never stops, it's always working and worrying and overthinking, but also for the way you're expected to be and act and live from your parents

You're basically your mothers show dog - do some math problems, say something smart, get a treat, and then go back to your crate

Both your parents think your siblings are a bad influence on you

"Y/n, stop fooling around!"

"We were just laughing. . . "

"Well stop it."

Tom is constantly trying to one-up you, but you're just too smart. Not only with math and literature and languages, but art, music, politics, etc. When he talks stupid you can't help but correct him

Cousin Greg is constantly giving you math problems to do on the spot, which he then checks with a calculator to be sure

"What's the square root on 945,678?

"972.45976."

You never have problems with forgetting anything because you also have a photographic memory. This works both in your favor and not. You remember anniversaries, birthdays, things people have said in passing, but you're also forced to relive every time Kendall has gone off script and every time your father has lashed out

You'll never forget the last words your father ever said to you, about how much you wasted your potential, that you were a failure like the rest of them, that he was embarrassed for you and about you. He never should have praised you as much as you did

All you said was that you thought he should leave Waystar to Ken, Shiv, and Rome, that you would be done when he was. You figured you'd get it over with before he made any decisions, not wanting to be left in charge. Of course you had no idea that was the last conversation you'd ever have

On that paper they found, it had been your name instead of Kendall's, underlined at first, crossed out in the end. You have to reassure your siblings that you knew nothing about this, that you told him you didn't want the company. They still don't fully believe you . . .

Being as smart as you are comes with perks of course, but overall it causes a lot of pain. You're not as close to your siblings because they think you're your father's favorite. You try though, you try to keep up the relationships, to be close to them

[solacescastleglow]

✨📚🌿My Dream Self 🌿📚✨

Well, let's see what I'm working for. I've always had an idea of who my dream self is, but never written it down in such detail. I don't think it's cheating that I'm solidly on my way to embodying a lot of these :)

Body + Health

they are on low dose testosterone and have had top surgery. they have also done voice training to keep their voice in a neutral range.

they no longer have chronic pain or fatigue, and they have found a way to live happily within the boundaries of what their genetic disabilities allow them to do.

they're physically fit and strong.

their skin is clear of acne, but there are signs of experience (scars, freckles, some wrinkles). their dark circles are gone.

Mind + Values

they are in love with their body.

they are free from their childhood trauma. all parts of them fully believe that they are safe.

their abusers have been exposed for what they did, but out of a refusal to ever be like them, my dream self doesn't take revenge and instead lets them suffer the natural consequences of everyone knowing.

they have recovered enough from burnout and have put up enough boundaries that they are once again able to engage in politics without it harming their mental health.

they have joined a local mutual aid group, serving the people of their community gives them joy.

they will never let anyone take advantage of them.

they value security and stability, and their actions reflect that.

they are kind to strangers, complimenting people on the street and offering to pay for people's food.

they know themself to be resilient, but live a life where that isn't the only option.

they have hope, not because they are naive, but because without it the world is a horrible place and they will be the change they want to see, g-ddamnit.

Habits + Lifestyle

they are high maintenance to be low maintenance; they get pedicures every month, eyebrow waxing every 3 weeks, and use tricks like dyeing their eyebrows and eyelashes to avoid wearing makeup.

hygiene is very important to them, and they make sure to have a shower at least once a day. they wash their hair twice a week and double cleanse their face, body, and hair every time.

they brush their teeth (and scrape their tongue) twice a day and have twice-weekly 'everything toothbrushings', which also includes oil pulling, water flossing with hydrogen peroxide, and a hydrogen peroxide rinse.

they have a simple but effective morning and night skincare routine. they remember to put on sunscreen, and have found one that doesn't feel icky.

they dedicate 30 minutes first thing in the morning and last thing at night to reading.

every evening, they cook meals for the family, and they're always delicious.

every tuesday, they take themself on a date.

every sunday, they plan the week out meticulously, mostly time blocking and meal planning.

once a month, they have a digital detox day.

their routines are so streamlined and easy that doing them is like second nature. they don't even have to think, they just do it.

Hobbies + Skills

they are physically active, and their favourite sports are fencing, badminton, and indoor rock climbing. they also enjoy pilates, yoga, and rowing and have tried horse riding.

they are c2 fluent in french and are proficient in auslan, hebrew, german, welsh, spanish, and mandarin. learning languages is a hobby for them.

they can mend their clothes beautifully and use embroidery techniques to make the mending visible. they know how to use both an electric and a treadle sewing machine and use them frequently to make historical fashion pieces.

learning is their number 1 passion. they love researching things relevant to their interests and remember everything they read. they study philosophy, history, and politics.

they can play guitar and piano decently well and do so regularly.

they play logic games like chess and sudoku.

Finances + Career

they are a speech pathologist working in private practice. their schedule is flexible and their work is rewarding. they specialise in AAC and get to spend lots of time making people's communication systems and advocating with their clients.

they are a published children's book author, and their series is a household name in their community. children at their temple come to them to give thoughts on the last book and ideas for the next. they work with cultural consultants so that each main character is properly represented.

they earn enough through work and investments to fund their lifestyle and save for retirement, at least $150,000 a year.

they have a high interest savings account with $10,000 in case of emergency.

they can afford to pay people for things that would otherwise take up time, like cleaning the house.

Environment + Material Things

they live in a townhouse in an inner suburb and co-own a holiday home in the south of france with a group of friends, which they go to once a year.

their garden is thriving and they have a grape trellis in their back garden.

their home is their sanctuary, it feels safe to be in and it's filled with beautiful things. there are fresh flowers on the table and pretty painted walls, and everything is clean.

their home includes a beautiful library with all kinds of books, but especially classics. their most precious books have been custom bound.

they have a private collection of antiques, from family heirlooms to bought pieces. some are kept in archival boxes, while others are restored and used for their intended purpose.

their fashion sense remains impeccable. they dress in their own style regardless of what's trendy and make many of their own clothes so everything can be exactly how they like it. they always overdress slightly, and have a good amount of eveningwear in addition to their day closet. their wardrobe matches their lifestyle.

they have a small but meaningful jewellery collection, filled with inherited and new classic pieces.

Community + Relationships

they are engaged in both their local and religious communities. they live in a world where there doesn't have to be conflict between the two.

they have friend groups of all different kinds, with people from different generations, backgrounds, identities, and abilities.

their closest friends also believe in relationship anarchy, and won't abandon them for a new romantic relationship.

they go to pub trivia with friends.

they have healed enough and have enough money to foster children, and though it's limited to one at a time, they consider them all their kids.

they love and take care of their cats more than words can say. their cats live a luxurious life and get lots of cuddles (if they want them).

[uriekukistan]

What languages do you think your favourite TG characters speak :0

wait okay so this is funny bc i have hcs that a lot of characters are illiterate bc so many of them didnt go to school, but anyway

urie the type of guy to speak fluent english but pretend he doesn’t when he visits the us just to piss off americans. respect bro

i think that eto is a hyper-polyglot. she speaks like 12 languages for no reason. she would learn languages that are known for being difficult, like thai or something just to flex.

in canon, hide tried to learn english to understand a song he liked, so i think he definitely at least knows basic english. following that, he probably tried to learn spanish and/or korean after finding some artists he liked (in my mind its bad bunny and twice).

ayato and touka think that kanji is enough foreign language for them (juuzou too)

akira probably learned french or italian. she just gives that vibe.

after kaneki told hinami that kanji comes from chinese characters, she probably tried learning mandarin. she thinks its cool how she can tell what some characters mean without looking them up because of the kanji she knows, but also forgets their pronunciation sometimes (me too)

nishiki is a science person so he probably learned latin to know like. stuff idk im not a science person i just know latin is useful for that.

in my mind saiko likes kpop, so she probably learned korean. not from a conscious effort, just from consuming media.

why can i see kaneki learning some ancient language? not latin, that’s too mainstream. like sanskrit or something. hieroglyphics. idk he just strikes me as the type. but also he references kafka so much in the beginning of the manga, i bet he learned german just to read him in his original language

shirazu the type of guy to do the duolingo klingon course. idk i hc him as a big sci fi guy, so i can just see him doing it.

mutsuki doesn’t actually know how to speak anything other than japanese, but he learns other languages scripts because he thinks they’re cool or pretty. he’s particularly fond of georgian and thai scripts. spends a lot of time making his handwriting super pretty.

takizawa just looks like the type of guy to learn german. idk why, he just. pre-ghoul takizawa looks like all the dudes who major in german at my uni

[thatonebritishheadmate]

do list them im curious

Apologies for the late response. Keep in mind once again, these are the languages I spoke back in source. Our body is only fluent in Portuguese and English.

Without further ado, here's every language I've learned, pretty much in chronological order as much as I could:

Every version of English that has ever existed since 1066. Naturally.

Several Celtic languages I picked up from my brothers.

French, which is likely the second language I use most on a daily basis after English. I might've also picked up some older versions simply due to how long I've known him.

Portuguese. I have more of an accent from Portugal when I speak it, since that's who I spent the most time with.

Latin. A lot of my magic has spells in this language, so eventually curiosity brought me to learn the whole thing. (Also because it's a cool sophisticated scholar language to know)

Spanish and Dutch, both from colonial years. Always a good investment to know what your rivals are saying.

Hindi, from when India was part of my territory.

German. I learned it before WWI, right after they'd started making a name for themselves and we became industrial rivals.

Japanese, I feel like it's pretty self-explanatory.

Italian. This one's on the weaker side, I basically just learned as much as needed during WWII, never bothered coming back to it.

Russian, you could say it was in high demand during the Cold War.

Most recently, Danish. The Scandinavian languages in general were always in high demand but low priority for me, and I kept putting it off. I finally came back as a way to sort of connect with my viking roots.

Bonus

Due to my interest in linguistics, I'm sure I must have made at least one conlang during my lifetime, though I couldn't tell you any specifics. Plus, there's several languages I only know a fraction of:

Romanian, I picked up some things from my time with him.

Norwegian and Swedish. Before committing to Danish, part of the reason it took so long was indeciveness; I couldn't pick between the three, so I absorbed only a bit from all of them at the time.

Greek, from my mythology phase. It was the first time I actively tried to learn a language rather than just passively absorbing it, I gave up soon after.

Some Arabic and Turkish from my interactions with the Middle East.

Mandarin and Cantonese, both around the time of the Opium Wars, as one might imagine.

Finally, bits of several languages from the many colonies in Africa and Asia.

[iheartchv]

Hi, I was wondering If I could get a cod matchup?

Im Ecuadorian-American. I’m an INFP, and I speak English, Spanish, and French. I’m also starting to learn Mandarin Chinese.

I’m 5’8, with dark brown hair that almost looks black, and brown eyes.

I have a HUGE extended family, but they don’t live in the US. Im from New York.

Personality-wise, I’m very shy and quiet, being selective of who I make my friends. Once I do though, I become very close to them. I’ve been described as a hidden treasure, like a pearl one might even say.

I am a bit of a nerd, (I even wear glasses, but they’re not too strong), I love playing COD (if you couldn’t already tell,) and Magic: The Gathering. I also like to draw, but have a mini panic attack when I see the prices of sketchbooks and charcoal pencils.

My music taste can only be described with “emotional whiplash,” because I love songs that sound very happy but have super dark lyrics. Aside from that, I love pop, Latin and Afro pop, EDM and RNB 

My love language is mostly gifts and quality time. If I’m really close to someone, it’s physical touch. In public, I’ll do something discretely, like holding somebody by their pinky. If it’s hidden, like under a table. I’ll be a little more daring, like putting my hand on their thigh.

Hope you have a good day! Take care of yourself, and sorry if this is a lot to take in!

//i tried to finish this before going to work; wifi at work sucks big time >3>

🤔 I'll match you with...

König 👑

I think you'd be paired with König

Scenario time:

Let's say you're in the military (your choice of what field/what you specialize in)

König and some of his Kortac comrades came by to talk with Captain Price

Kortac was thinking of borrowing some of TF 141 for a mission

König walked around the base, looking for those he saw fit; you were one of those soldiers/specialists

That's when he met you

And when his eyes met yours, for some reason, he felt something wash over him.. it was strange

🤍

At first it might seem like nothing is happening between you two, what with you both keeping to yourselves

Until he sees you with a sketchbook and a pencil

He sees it move across the page, his interest piqued

I headcanon that König is a creative person

I mean, look at his gear

It isn't military grade but it does and serves its purpose

So he'll come up to you, trying to gather what he needs to push himself to get to talk to you

"What are you doing?"

Despite him being a big man, you didn't hear him behind you

You jumped, your heart pounding from surprise

"Oh, did I frighten you?" He playfully said, although he was masking that he wanted to apologize for scaring you

"N-no..."

Silence for a second

"Just... practicing some shadows and shading..."

There is a landscape on the page

He's amazed at the skill you have though he's trying to be subtle about his interest in you

"That is... very good"

🤍

You two would make a cute couple

During briefings or meetings, I can see you touching him under the table

And König would try not to be flustered

Under his mask you'd know he was blushing

Your eyes sparkle with mischief

His eyes would look at you, tell you that you would be getting it when the meeting or briefing is over

One of König's love languages is gift giving

If he sees something that reminds him of you, he'll get it for you

Or he will make something for you

Quality time is another one of his love languages

Being alone with you is all he'd ever want

It don't matter if he watches you draw or play a game, you both do something together or not, he'll just enjoy being around you

Hugs and cuddles from this giant teddy bear 🧸

Forehead kisses, on top of your head, open mouthed kisses everywhere

He'd sigh

"I adore you, liebling"

His hands would run through your hair, trace over your facial features as if he was memorizing you, burning every single detail into his memory

Who would've thought there would've been someone so gentle underneath his tough exterior?

❤

[charlotte-family-apologist]

I need more Sonya headcannons basically everything on her tag is so negative rn it actually driving me crazy

Yeah I noticed that, it's kinda making me sad lol

Her mother, Erica Blade, is a nurse, and her father, Herman Blade, was a major in the special forces. She is the oldest child and has three younger brothers. She was only a couple minutes older than her twin, Daniel Blade. Her middle brother, Liam Blade, is three years younger, and Scott Blade, the youngest, is five years younger than her.

She was taught that there is a logical, scientific explanation for everything. Had a crisis during the first tournament.

Told kids at school that Santa Claus wasn't real.

Her favorite song is "Never Let Me Down Again" by Depeche Mode.

Started learning Tae Kwon Do when she was six and was on her school's gymnastics team.

She was born June 21st, 1962.

She is effortlessly fashionable- like she doesn't even try and she looks good. Usually wears jeans or cargo pants with like a wife beater. If was considered acceptable, she would wear just a sports bra as a top. Only buys new clothes for work, everything else is thrifted.

Her work partner that Kano killed was actually a childhood friend who went into the special forces with her.

Somewhat of a polyglot. Speaks fluent Spanish, Mandarin, German, and French. Started to learn Italian from Johnny and Min from Kung Lao and Liu Kang.

She and Kung Lao got along really well (I know they barely interacted in canon but I need these two sass lords to be friends) and would have gossip sessions whenever they met up. Even tried to recruit him to the SF but he declined, though he does help out if she calls for him.

Loves cafes. Has a ranked list of the ones she's been to and the baristas at her favorites know her by name. If she's struggling with work she'll go to one and do paperwork in one of the back tables, ordering a new drink whenever she finishes the last one.

Likes to try new foods but can't cook from scratch. Makes a mean box dinner though.

[catchyhuh]

LUP AND LANGUAGE!!

just our special guy today because i’ve realized i have very complex thoughts about my main man’s polyglotism and the way i see it utilized in canon and in fan work from time to time. i will be rambling, i will be going off target, this is a promise SO LET'S GO!

so baseline, lupin was bilingual from almost birth, with the whole mixed upbringing and all. so we know that, from the start. french dad, japanese mom, you-- i mean it would be jarring to somehow not know a lick of either. I MEAN THEY GOTTA TALK TO THE BABY SOMEHOW

when he was about 4, the Horrors began. you can’t be much of an international thief only speaking two languages that are… really only primarily spoken in their countries of origin (canadian french is very different you know) so they started piling on more: spanish, italian, english, german, they tried cantonese too, but he had so much trouble with the tones that they dialed it down to mandarin, and he… still had trouble with the tones, because even as an adult that’s a LOT of voice control that he tends to lose when he’s overly happy or upset. so yeah it was hard for a FOUR year old to manage it

it’s kind of funny though; the first language he could really speak was japanese, and the language he usually defaults to, the language he THINKS in, is STILL japanese. all those language courses just for him to stick to ol’ reliable

however, certain words pop up in french first for him; usually numbers. by the time he was learning to count, his dad was more adamant about him speaking french more, so numbers (and colors) register as french in his head before he runs them through a little translator in his head and goes “TWENTY” at top volume. if somebody is describing a math problem to him in japanese, even though he’s most comfortable IN that language, he has to redo the whole thing in his head in french to really get his answer. yes, it’s miserable for him

the language he speaks SECOND most often is usually english, but more for a comedic beat than anything. ironically, lupin uses english the way some english speakers use french, in a way to be goofy and overdramatic about mundane shit. but also if you buy into the “jigen was born in america” thing then it just makes even MORE sense he’d be speaking it semi-often

the thing about his french is that while it’s still deeply ingrained into him, he… very rarely sees it come up in interactions. even when IN france, he sort of subconsciously removes his personal connection to it out of the picture. it’s like speaking portuguese in brazil, or speaking russian in, uh, russia. more of a needed skill than a part of HIM, really. in order to truly unlock his French Mode, he’d need to be around someone speaking french OUTSIDE of france, because, weird as it may sound, that’s just how he’s connected to it. and then he’d talk to them for a bit, start slipping into it naturally, and he might accidentally lock himself into it for an hour or so after they’re done talking. this is really the only kind of instance that gets him to slip up around any of the other four, because in his mind, why would he be speaking in french when he knows he can better communicate with the sorry bastard in front of him in another language?

i leave you with one final note to a question you could maybe be having idk: so, how many languages CAN lupin speak? and the answer to that is uh. i don’t know. many. whatever is plot relevant. are we like counting piglatin too or