#i have to censor myself this month
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wahgifs · 9 months ago
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© cham_outside - one and two
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magentagalaxies · 6 months ago
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vent incoming:
got my grades back for my courses last semester and most of it was to be expected, mostly A's, maybe an A-, etc. but i honestly can't get over the fact that my independent study (the buddy cole documentary) was for some reason given a B. like sure getting a B isn't bad per se, I usually get at least one B every semester and i honestly don't really care about what my exact gpa is as long as i can graduate, but come on. this school put me through months of psychological torment over this project and didn't even have the nerve to give me a B+??? i'm still coping with the self-doubt they forced on me and this bullshit is not helping!!
#honestly it's kind of hilarious ngl. especially bc i also got my documentary work counted as an independent study the previous semester#and the previous semester even tho i barely worked on the doc itself#(mostly just planning and putting together the crowdfunding which was still a lot of work but like compare it to the past few months)#they were willing to give me an A (my school doesn't do A+ so this is the highest mark possible)#vs this semester. like i'll admit my final assignment was late and could have been more polished#but i was literally on tour in documentary-mode 24/7 for several weeks. i filmed an entire comedy special! i put together a live interview!#not to mention having to fucking negotiate with my own college censoring the footage they'd promised me of an event i put together#and play nice with a professor who literally outed me on twitter in an attempt to cancel one of my best friends#at this point the ''B'' feels more like a petty grudge than anything else#like ok we can't get away with *actually* fucking over jessamine's grades bc clearly ze did do the work. but let's just give zir a B#like i will admit the audio quality in my final isn't great. and i could have used more polished footage in some sections#but counterpoint: 100+ students were arrested at a protest while i was editing and i was having a mental breakdown#the fact that i finished *anything* is goddamn impressive especially after they essentially conditioned me to hate myself any time i was#working on a project i loved!!!#due to the aforementioned student arrests my college did put out an option where we could change any letter grade this semester to pass/fai#so anything passing wouldn't impact our gpa if we didn't want it to. so i could just change the B to a ''pass''#but really what's the point. ''B'' is still a good grade and my GPA is fine (3.65 on a 4.0 grading scale. 2.0 is required to graduate)#it just sucks that after what i went through last semester i feel like nobody takes it seriously#i was reminiscing earlier about how it's honestly kind of funny how after that professor outed me on twitter#i was at the hotel with scott like an hour later sobbing and having an existential crisis about my relationship to gender#and scott was so supportive but also awkwardly being like#''i know i should offer the crying child a tissue but where the fuck are the tissues in this room what do i do''#and he just handed me a full-on towel instead like oh my god he was trying his best but also so clearly out of his depth#but of course i then had to remember how when i told that story to a different professor to be like ''this is how much scott cares about me#this guy called me fucking UNPROFESSIONAL for crying in front of the subject of my documentary?????????#like yeah maybe so but how DARE you call me unprofessional when a different professor tweeted my full name and gender without my consent#in an attempt to fucking cancel one of my friends for ''misgendering'' me for using pronouns i'm fine with him using!!!#i don't think i'm ever going to be able to forgive my college and i don't know how i'll be able to get through one more semester#that experience genuinely changed things about my psychology that i'm not proud of and i need to work through#so if i have to miss a goddamn kids in the hall event because i have class this november i am going to set something on fire
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dimiclaudeblaigan · 8 months ago
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If there is at least one thing I can credit FE for doing better than Tales in localization, it's not trying to actively go out of their way for an entire game to avoid subtext or direct text between two men that is romantic or implied romantic. Funny when it's so present that the attempt doesn't even work; infuriating that it was attempted to begin with.
So as much as I often have issues with some of FE's localizations, at least they have a leg up on loc Tales for that.
#DCB Comments#imagine changing entire sentences and vocal tones just to try to avoid it#if anything I'd say at least in FE the locs just... keep what's there like#they could've toned Soren and Houses Yuri down and they didn't. they just kept their lines or in some cases#especially with Houses Yuri I'd say leaned into them#have to specify bc Houses Yuri got to keep his bi agenda. Vesperia Yuri had the unfortunate issue of#the loc not wanting to keep his gay and trying reeeeally hard to avoid it#including altering entire sentences to avoid any woe is them misunderstandings about men having feelings for each other#meanwhile Houses Yuri is free to call men cute and lo and behold everyone loved that for him#they removed and altered a LOT of Vesperia Yuri's personality traits#(including any ability to express real sadness or fear bc woe is them if he's not a cool edgy man)#but they also really changed his tone toward Flynn PLUS some of what they say to each other#and twisted it to make it sound like Yuri was either angry or wasn't actually emotional abt him#forget the way they brought Grant George in for the DE release and made him sound just completely DEAD with zero personality#like. I can tolerate playing Houses dubbed despite my gripes with it (story based stuff)#it didn't feel like they were trying to alter LBGT+ aspects and they even for some rly leaned into it#basically if you haven't played Vesperia Yuri is... really gay coded. the loc pretended not to notice#in fact he's queer + gay coded bc and doesn't fit male gender norms and the gacha games LOVE that with his hair/outfits#Rays mind you is JP only bc it was shut down very quickly in the west and Vesp Yuri's story in Rays is uh#basically it centers around Flynn he loses his shit to protect Flynn and they do the usual like#don't-admit-it's-gay-outright in fictional media by using the ''Yuri's important person'' shtick#but he activates a special power in the middle of utterly raging to get Flynn back from their enemies#funny thing? that game never made it to that arc. I was told in about five months the western ver would've gotten that#but in some way I'm glad it didn't bc who knows how they would've tried to spin that#It's BAFFLING to me how you can get characters in Tales like JAY but the locs shake in their boots at the idea of queer gays#but given how allergic fictional media is to admitting a male character is gay -gestures to Ike and Vesp Yuri-#I'm not surprised I'm just actually angry that the locs try to censor homosexual relationships as much as possible even when they barely ca#if anyone does know Vesp Yuri and is confused on why I'm calling him gay coded despite what the dub did with Judith feel free to ask#bc I do ship them a little bit myself! but I just recognize that canon wise I really can't see him as anything but gay-demiromantic#but again at least FE locs don't shake in their boots anymore abt same sex pairs including men (side eyes Lucius/Raven)
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heartual · 10 months ago
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eugh
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vanyafresita · 10 months ago
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actually, you know what ? im glad my ex gf ghosted me, i dodged a bullet it seems
#this was two years ago and just a few months ago i started getting over it#on the one hand yeah it fucking SUCKS i wish i had had some type of warning instead of radio silence suddently from one day to the other#on the other i was ready to move to texas (me: poc queer fem presenting nd bitch) and was looking seriously jobs over there#and like- i fucking HATE the usa but she was really scared about leaving the states to come to europe- so i was willingly to travel there to#be with her and not put her through that (ive been traveling since childhood so im used to it- but she has certain mental stuff going on and#taking her away from her family and her childhood city was going to be really tough- of course i'd sacrifice my life for hers)#and like im so sorry to everybody who is stuck in the usa right now bcs ur country is treating yall so poorly i feel genuinely bad#but as someone who was planninh to work over there as a teacher..... IM SO FUCKING GLAD I DONT HAVE TO SET FOOT THERE 😭#every single thing i hear about the education system there seems hellish- as well as the teachers' conditions and wages#like over here its not all rainbows and flowers but at least i dont have to worry about school shootings or getting fired for recommending#books from a banned list 💀#ESPECIALLY as a poc latino queer linguistics and literature teacher- i'd love to talk to students about a big range of things- i cannot#imagine having to censor myself or dance around a subject becs “kids are too dumb to understand queerness” “youre trying to groom them”#“dont brainwash em you commie” like ma'am im trying to help your child develop basic empathy and respect for those who dont look like them#like i hear some serious worrying stuff from teachers over there i hope u guys are holding up somehow 😭😭😭#anyways idk how the phrase in english goes but in spanish we say cuando dios cierra una puerta- abre una ventana#(<- trying to look for the positive in getting ghosted by the girl of their dreams)#its fine guys anyways#yeah that was the first LD relationship ive ever had- never trying that again#also i found out im arospec so im definitely not getting into a romantic relationship lmfaoooooo#only QPRs for me now if anything lol#vanya strawberry flavored
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woodfrogs · 1 year ago
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mothers will see you grow up and form your own opinions and express them and go "is anybody gonna argue with her" and not wait for an answer
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feyarcher · 1 year ago
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I think my new personal youtube rule is going to be that I unfollow and stop watching anyone who says 'corn' instead of 'porn' or says 'shit' and then censors the back half of the word. I understand that this comes from tiktok and has been imported into youtube not wanting to promote/ put pricey ads on videos deemed "mature", but I'm a full grown adult and I feel like I'm losing my mind from this trash. And I just have to tap out of it at this point.
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takoto · 3 months ago
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Went somewhere important today
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wkiwf · 19 days ago
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i love this new era of life im living in
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ricoka · 6 months ago
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thought I'd feel sad about not being able to salvage what I thought was a friendship but I realise it's actually such a fucking relief that they're gone from my dashboard
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sneefsnorf · 7 months ago
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OH HEY!! do you have final thoguhts on ultrakill and gabriel and the v's and everything :333333 <- my agenda
machine. ive spent my life loved and revered by my people and my church. i trusted my institution and my Father because i never had a reason not to, machine. the council and the people had such high expectations of me and i always rose to meet them. my achievements were many. everything was perfect. and then you took it all from me, machine. i failed ONCE. i wasnt what the church wanted me to be exactly and they tore their love away from me. its not fair. not in the slightest. ive been thinking a lot. ive been reflecting on the churches and the institutions of mankind. so many of them have warped the word of the Father into whatever will give them the most power. they use his teachings to break down and bully those they hate. they grind them into the ground and humiliate them as much as they can, not just for their own self-gain, but for the sake of hatred. this is what the council has done to me, machine, and now i have joined your ranks. all their love for me revoked as soon as i couldnt be what they wanted, thrown from the gates of heaven like the queers and the freaks. i've joined your ranks, machine. i'm less than a person now. and i am filled with so much rage.
anyways thanks for driving me to the abortion clinic machine i really appreciate it
#sneefs asks#cathartidae#sorry for answering your question in writing from gabriels perspective i have issues stemming from how i was treated by a catholic institut#i have issues. im also need to do insane things to him like [EXTENDED CENSOR TONE]. sorry#ANYWAYS its a really good game and i love it lots. i really wanna play it myself but i dunno if my mum would be too pleased with me playing#an incredibly violent first person shooter. she's not too big on those games and i'd be playing it in the same room where she's doing her#phd. she would not appreciate it. which i totally get so ill probably play it once i move out in a few months#ANYWAYS i do wonder how intelligent the V models are. are they mostly just programmed to understand combat pathfinding and basic puzzles?#because if i was designing a robot that needs reaction and processing time as quick as V1 i would only give it the bare minimum for#it to function as intended. being able to understand langauge and emotion or do. idk complex maths calculations seems like extra shit i don#need my killing machine to do#but then there is the thing where V1 can scan text and understand which parts are important. and V2 bowed before their first duel. and she#had such ATTITUDE in the second one. cuz yeah they have emotions and stuff. i do wonder a lot about whether they have theory of mind#ability to recognise or even create art. all that stuf. there is that scene with mirage that is incredibly conceptually abstract and deep#but im not sure how closely that relates to the V models' own brains/GPUs/whatever they have#i think thats probably just something ive picked up from the fandom portraying V1 as not as emotionally aware or intelligent as gabriel.#(at least in a way we understand as humans) anyways id love to know more about V1's thought process independent of the player and how she#experiences emotions. anyways. awesome game. bangin graphics. bangin story. bangin soundtrack#also i would do CRAZY things to a hideous mass i mean WHO SAID THATTTTTTTTT
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a-very-fond-farewell · 8 months ago
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ok the vibe is: I’m just a silly little guy in a dreadful little world. time to go back to my roots (*eats croutons straight from the bag*)
#sneaky niki#it’s update time on yours truly#lamb loose liveblogging#I’m using that tag in case anyone reading my current fic needs to know where I’m at#I did rest a little bit. thank you for asking#no. unfortunately my hand seems to be getting worse. I still need to take a shirt on of notes for my IRL stuff tho#*SHITTON of notes (y u censor me text-predictive keyboard??)#so I’m trying to pace myself a little#but I did write something for the fic!#yay me :D#turns out my circadian rhythm is fucked anyway. so I still wake up at 5am every morning no matter what#they will scoop me off the floor one of these days#in the meantime.............. I’m like. I’m 200k words in as I check the draft for the entire project and#fellas is it gay to hyperfocus on two trash idiots so much you end up writing 200k words for them??#in like....... 5 months??#on the bright side. I’ll meet a friend this weekend after 4 months apart :D#I’ve self-isolated so much that I don’t know how I’ll manage. but I’ll be in a bookstore for the first time in 4 months! can u believe it??#still. city scary. full of women I won’t be able to stare in the eyes. I’m easily affected.#also so many dogs I will never have the courage to ask if I can pet#anyway regarding the fic#I’m trying to map out ch18 now#all I can say is: SDY u cvnt. absolute trash of a man. I will avenge you#also backscratchers and a man walking on a roof are somewhat involved??#let’s hope I can plan this out the right way before word-vomiting all over it#so. that being said. I hope anyone reading is having a good time#if not I still hope you can get some comfort from your pets or plants or projects#or people. yea. those too. (notice how effortless that was. very much a people’s person me. obviously)#Niki out ~<3
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furrysmp · 8 months ago
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congrats to everyone that is still following me after I saw I had way too many followers to not have at least one antisemitic person following me, the fact that you don't think I murder children for fun is truly a comfort
#I wish this was /s but no genuinely#Had 22 followers. Every time I reach past 20 at least one is antisemitic#I now have 15 followers#thanks for not hating me for being born in a country once btw#Like listen I don't mind if you mass reblog propal stuff. That's good#Just please make sure it's not the posts that talk about how israelis are all evil and want to murder everyone#And maybe reblog. One post about how there's a lot of antisemitism in propal spaces#And how you don't want to make the jews on your blog scared or uncomfortable over that#Just one post. It doesn't have to be praising israel bc fuck knows I hate our current government so much#But I see posts about how secular jews in israel are actually european colonizers roleplaying#And I think about how 100 years ago my great grandparents moved here#And how I'm genuinely scared for my sister who is visiting friends in the uk in a month#And how I'm scared for myself if I ever leave this country again#Because apparently me not wanting to die is controversial in all my political spaces#Except for pro israelis leftist spaces#And that's really sad#That I don't feel safe with yall anymore#Idk#I once joined a mcytblr discord server#The first day I'm there someone asks to “censor i/p” and gets the response “just don't look at the vent channel”#So. I looked.#Not a single person in that server cared enough to say “but it's not all israelis” at the people raving about i/p#Like people out there saying I on a personal level would be happy to murder people because of where I was born#I still get squirmy killing spiders that have rather painful bites. I could never hurt another human on purpose#And they just kept agreeing with each other in the most echo-chamber-y way#So. I left that server#And now I barely do mcyt fandom stuff because I'm scared of getting attention#I don't want attention on my blog or on me as a person#Because at least one in 20 followers will cheer if I get murdered#And that's fucking heartbreaking
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picturejasper20 · 7 months ago
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Wow... people having to identify themselves to a government because of they are part of a group that is seen as ¨other¨ or because they want to learn about a certain topic...where i have seen this before...
I don't know... maybe what it is considered one of the biggest red flags in steps of dehumanization of groups, mainly minorities?
Btw, this is what the people behind KOSA are trying to impose in all the United States of America.
[Image ID: News politcs article about USA politics that says ¨Kansas governor passes law requiring ID to view acts of 'homosexuality' online, vetoes anti-LGBTQ+ bill¨ /.End ID]
Link to the article: https://www.advocate.com/politics/kansas-veto-age-verification-gender-affirming-care-abortion
Edit: Since this gained more notes, for those who don't know KOSA is, it is a USA bill that was reintroduced on May 2023 (last year). It is called ¨Kids Online Safety Act¨ (KOSA for short). It has been introduced and reintroduced for a while now since 2022. It is meant with the intention to ¨protect kids¨ by restricting their use of internet by pushing age restrictions and people having to present their ID to use internet or access certain websites, quite similar to the Kansas state bill that got passed. Many groups and people have criticized this bill for the potential censorship it can come with it and do more harm to the kids than help them. Possible censorship that has been suggested this bill can bring is LGBT+ content, politics and news, mental health search, political and social opinions in general (adults included). What is more, it has been put into question the possible invasion of privacy for both minors and adults by having to share an identification to use certain websites. That people could get censored or doxxed by doing this.
As for the bill itself, there was a hearing earlier today in the Senate. ( April 17th-Wednesday). It could take a while before it gets voted and has to pass different stages. Then it would take months (18 months) to be implemented if it gets passed.
I'm not American myself, so i'm not sure how much i can do about this. What i do recommend is making calls to senators and people involved in pushing this bill to make clear your disapproval of it. Try sign petitions or just telling others about it.
Some sources: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kids_Online_Safety_Act https://www.stopkosa.com/ https://www.badinternetbills.com/ https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2024/02/dont-fall-latest-changes-dangerous-kids-online-safety-act
Website to keep track of the KOSA bill movements and cosponsors of the bill:
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reversesymmetry · 1 year ago
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I made the decision to go two weeks between shots instead of doing them every week and not to be dramatic or anything but I kinda wanna kill myself
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idolomantises · 4 months ago
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Wasn't sure when it would be the best time to discuss this, but since the ending is drawing near... yes, Bugtopia is ending.
It was a decision I really wrestled with myself for months over it, before finally concluding that letting it end after 40 episodes was the better option. Just to be clear, webtoons did not force me to end the series. They even offered to give me a pay raise to continue the series. It was my decision due to a multitude of personal factors. I'll just repeat what I said on my patreon:
I just want to say, first of all, thank you all so much for patiently waiting for my series to release and for supporting my work as I began developing the series. Bugtopia was a series I genuinely loved and adored and it made me feel so incredibly happy that people were turning their heads towards a series about weird bugs and their natural lives.
However, as you can probably guess, it pains me to say that I am concluding the series after season 1. I had 4 seasons planned with new characters to introduce, but unfortunately, I cannot see myself continuing to work with Webtoons and I want to pursue other projects.
This decision was due to a compiling number of issues with the company, the final straw was when they had a mass layoff, fired my editor that I've been working with for two years, and did not inform me for a week, leaving me in the dark until they randomly assigned me with someone else. My new editor is great and I'm glad I'm working with someone so patient and understanding, but this decision to fire my previous editor, the one who got me the job to begin with, without prior warning made me feel disrespected and disregarded, and it killed all motivation I had for properly completing the series.
I also felt incredibly overworked, I was spending vacation days working on comics and avoiding time with family just so I could get something done for webtoons once I come home. I feel like so much time was being wasted away for a company that paid me so little that I had to work twice as hard building up funds on my patreon. Bugtopia just ate up so much of my time. The pay also didn't make up for it. It's commonly assumed that webtoons authors make about $800 for the episodes they do, but that's not true. In fact, you can make far less depending on the amount of panels expected for your contract. It doesn't help that the artwork i did for banners and promotions were all things I had to draw and didn't get paid for, and the work I gave was either tampered with or scrapped, making me feel like I spent more hours of my day wasting time. There were also comics I had to censor and scrap, likely due to another series being in hot water for its racially insensitive content. But it was just extra work I wasn't being paid for. It also frustrated me because I was seeing other series with far more explicit content getting away with a slap on the wrist (turns out you can't say "fuck" anymore without it being hit with a mature rating, disappointing!)
In all honesty, it just felt like webtoons needed me more than I needed them. I was making more money from patreon in a week than I was making from webtoons in a month.
Personally, while I don't really regret my time with Webtoons and met some great people along the way, I honestly don't think any artist should work with them. You will be severely overworked and underpaid, and will barely be featured in ads unless your series becomes an instant hit immediately. It doesn't really matter how successful you are, you're just a product to Webtoons, put yourself above the corporation.
I have tried my best to provide you all with a satisfying conclusion to Bugtopia, even if some episodes may feel rushed or incomplete, but I completely understand if the conclusion isn't to your liking and I do apologize, but I could not continue working on this series if this was the mistreatment I was going to continuously get. I owe a massive thank you to my editor and assistants for helping me complete the series, I truly don't think I could have ever finished it without them.
Though I am done with Bugtopia, that does not mean I want to stop projects entirely, so please don't feel bad for me. I have a lot of upcoming projects and ideas in the works, and I'm still continuing the Monsters and Girls series.
Will Bugtopia ever return... possibly. I retain complete ownership of the series after a few years, and I wouldn't mind continuing the canvas series (or possibly starting over). Unfortunately I don't think I can continue the Webtoon Original as it belongs to webtoons now, but never say never I suppose!
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