#i have to ask if i can use a communal space for it ^^;
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Considering the fact that there's still ongoing waves of covid, bird flu is an active concern, and I'm disabled, no, I don't have in-person social life. And since people refuse to mask up, get vaccinated, or offer virtual participation in things anymore, my attempts to find wider social groups keep getting hamstrung. It sucks. A lot.
I've thought about joining the local French conversation group, but they don't have any covid safety protocols in place. I've thought about going to the weekly free art classes at the comic school, but they aren't covid-safe either, so I just watch the recordings when they upload them on YouTube later. I've thought about going to multiple groups at the local queer community center, but when I asked if they had covid safety protocols, their excuse was that "Ron DeSantis banned mask mandates, so we don't do that anymore," instead of doing literally anything to fight DeSantis. I keep thinking about going back to my theatre & stage combat troupe at the ren faire, but I got sick after the show every single year pre-covid and I cannot risk that "faire crud" being covid proper. I just can't.
I am an active member of a union, but that doesn't count for this poll because I exclusively participate online by video calling into meetings. I play D&D with my parents and siblings every week, but that doesn't count because they're family. I talk to multiple friends and family members every day and regularly check in with folks, but it doesn't count because it's on my phone. I hang out with my housemates and we do all kinds of things together, but that doesn't count because they're the people I live with.
I am being as social as I safely can. It feels really shitty that so many people think it isn't good enough. It feels really shitty to constantly feel like my choices are "be a weird angry shut-in" or "elevate my covid exposure risk." It feels like there's no winning.
If you genuinely believe that it's important for people to have in-person social outlets (and I do agree!), here's what you need to be doing:
Follow the People's CDC's Safer In-Person Gatherings guide (which is due to be updated for 2025 soon).
Get your updated covid booster. People aren't getting their updated vaccines, and it's a problem. If it is available to you, you need to GO. GET. YOUR. BOOSTER. And get your flu shot while you're at it.
Advocate for improved air filtration in the space you want people to meet in. Push for air purifiers if the HVAC system can't be fully upgraded. Help make Corsi-Rosenthal boxes.
At gatherings, provide FREE high-quality N95 masks for people who may not be able to access them. Get some for yourself if you can, and actually wear the fucking things. Over your nose and mouth. Properly.
Stop participating in social dogpiling when people make honest blunders or commit a faux pas. A lot of people have been isolated for years by this point. Social skills atrophy if they aren't used. Is that "weird" person in the group actually hurting anyone, or are they just awkward, intimidated, and out of practice when it comes to social groups?
Stop being a shithead to people who still can't participate. Stop entertaining the belief that people who don't have a robust external social life are "defective" or "untrustworthy." Stop treating people who don't have a robust social life as if they're dangerous, stupid, or shady. Sometimes people just don't have a robust social life. There are many, many reasons. It's not something you should make harsh judgments about.
Evaluate your space for general accessibility. Can disabled people enter and make use of the space? Is it mobility aid friendly? Sensory friendly? Are there things that can help make it easier for disabled people to find, access, and participate in the group? Have you asked any disabled people about how you can make improvements?
Get your fucking covid booster. It's on here twice because data suggests you fuckers aren't doing it. Go get your fucking vaccine.
I know I'm setting myself up for another barrage of, "Ren, it's just some stupid tumblr post, it isn't that serious" comments, but...well, it is that serious to me. I want to participate in social groups again. I want to go places and do things again. I want to go out. But I, and a lot of other people like me, just don't have the option.
You can help give us that option by giving a shit about covid safety and disability justice in your community.
Thanks, Anon!
-submit your poll!-
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it’s actually insane to me in retrospect that viktor got the arc he did. I need to go back and count his screen time minutes, but it’s clear that he’s up there numerically, and his story has so much weight within the narrative outside of just numbers as well.
beyond that, though, is the fact that viktor's narrative is fundamentally one about internalized ableism and the systemic structures that encourage it.
(obligatory disclaimer #1 that I have a significant mobility disability and a progressive chronic illness, but I am only one disabled person.)
imagine this: you are a child. you are disabled. the world you live in is one where you cannot afford healthcare; no one is there to teach you how to even use your cane correctly. your world is inaccessible and, worse, even the people who would normally show class solidarity with you don't, because you are not even able to do what they expect from you. characters like vi, powder, claggor, ekko, and mylo are all shown care and solidarity that viktor isn't — because they are able-bodied and therefore able to "pull their own weight."
this, at least, is an environment that can probably be overcome or mitigated by age and meeting people in your community who do care about you. this is an environment comparable to that of many, many, many disabled people who manage to thrive in a deeply unfair and ableist world.
but then you encounter a man who sees that you have talent and tells you as much. he does not ask much of you and he does not care that you are disabled. all he asks is for some help, which you give, and in return he teaches you the things he knows. what comes of this, after all is said and done and your understanding of the world has been fundamentally changed, is that you do have something you can give to your community, to the world. you have a talent which you can use to make yourself useful. you're not strong or sturdy but you can make machines, and that is always in need.
but you can't skate by on being useful like a normal child. the onus is always on you to prove that you're worth the air you breathe and the space you take up, that it's worthwhile to keep you alive. and the place to go to make yourself the most useful, where the most change can be made, is not a place you have any traditional way of accessing. you, through tenacity and grit, manage to get there anyways. (the show doesn't depict this, but any way viktor would have managed to get to the academy would have involved significant difficulty and possibly deception).
and when you get there, to that towering city of bronze, you find that nothing you do actually matters all that much.
everyone looks at you and sees your disability. everyone looks at you and sees where you're from. no matter how smart or accomplished or helpful you are, your behavior will always be, in their eyes, representative of your people. you could handle the stares, the rejection. but their judgement is dangerous to you and your people.
so, in order to survive, you must be perfect. you must project confidence or at least indifference to their cruelty. you must do as you're told and accept meager promotions and toil away as an assistant. you might be the only disabled zaunite they'll ever meet, so you have to make it count. if you fail, if they decide everyone from the undercity is lazy and useless, it's your fault.
you tell yourself you won't let them get to you. you tell yourself that you believe in your abilities.
it's a convenient narrative, and it's wholly untrue.
you, after all, are only a human being. a lifetime of the chips stacked against you is nearly impossible to overcome.
and so the image you build of yourself is that of a man far more self-confident than you, one who is quiet and reserved but proud of his accomplishments. the man you actually are, though, is one desperate for acceptance. desperate to assimilate. you chase your dreams, yes, but you can't bear to take credit, can't bear to be the face of them. you don't let yourself get close to anyone except the man you've built all of this with, who you love more than anyone else. you don't let anyone touch you (except him) and you don't touch anyone. you convince yourself you don't deserve his love or anyone's, that you're not whole enough for that.
you take it so far that, when you finally have the technology you think can cure your terminal illness, the first thing you try to fix is your leg. not the thing eating at your lungs and cutting short the time you thought you had, but the leg which has marked you as Other your entire life. and even though it doesn't quite work, even though it still causes you pain with every step, you force yourself to run on it — faster and faster until you're outrunning the ships and screaming because you may have visibly "fixed" your leg but it still hurts the same.
and when the system is not only oppressive in the material sense but also set up to make you hate yourself, there is almost no escaping this cycle of self-hatred. throw in the fact that in season 2 viktor keeps getting tossed from resurrection to resurrection against his will and it's no wonder the man did the things he did. it doesn't excuse them by any means, but arcane is not interested in excuses — it's interested in what makes people do the things they do. everything that he did to the people in the commune was a reflection of his own self-hatred, both because he still possessed it after death but also because, since he was programming the hexcore to try and save his life but started with "fixing" his leg, it is designed to make people as physically "normal" as possible. the faceless, identical machine people are a metaphorical representation of the ideology viktor has bought into in his pursuit of self-hatred and internalized ableism. his whole arc across both seasons is a demonstration and condemnation of the ways that systems of oppression reinforce self-hatred in the people they are oppressing.
obligatory disclaimer #2 that I don't think arcane did everything right. I'm frustrated with the direction of season 2 away from the piltover/zaun class conflict and towards the broader league of legends universe. but I do think, as a disabled person with a very similar experience of my disability to viktor, that this arc is well-done and very compelling. in the end, what saves the world is viktor accepting that he is deserving of being loved. I'm going to be thinking about this one for a good long while.
#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#viktor arcane#jayce talis#jayvik#internalized ableism is something that has seriously impacted my perception of myself throughout my life and my ability to thrive#so it's wild to see an arc in a massive media property actually explore it well
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Regarding the Iskall Situation...
I've received a lot of asks wondering about what my take is on it, and since I'd prefer to have it all taken care of in one swoop so we don't have to continue to focus on it, here's my stance on the subject.
A: Yes, I have seen the credible evidence from Kasszki, I read the doc they posted, and I feel awful for them and the other victims that they had to deal with this. I'm glad to hear that the Hermits and others were supportive of them and helped them handle this situation in as professional a manner as possible. I have also seen the credible information from False that Stress left for her own separate reasons.
B: I strongly denounce Iskall's behavior, and I have absolutely zero intention of supporting him as a creator ever again.
C: Please don't pester the creators or the victims. I said it in my initial response to this situation before we knew what had happened, but my opinion remains the same here. Any information we get from the Hermits is a privilege, not a right. Hermitcraft and it's associated fandoms are well known for being healthy, good spaces, and I'm proud to be a member of this community. Now our money is where our mouths are. Please don't feed into the rumor mill, please continue to support the Hermits as you always would and don't pry or demand more details from them. This is a very difficult situation for all of us, and I'm certain it's even worse for all of them. Please keep in mind the Hermits are all grown adults, many of them had professional careers before they joined Hermitcraft, and they are handling this in as professional a manner as they are able. I applaud them for that. As their fans, we need to do the same.
What are my plans for Iskall and Stress in TTSBC?
Understandably, I've received several asks about what I plan to do about Iskall and Stress's characters in TTSBC. I've answered them individually, but I just want to put this here as a one-stop spot for what my stance is so it's clear.
I've always been a 'character not content creator' author. My characters are just that, characters. Does that mean I can completely remove them from the creators upon which they are based? No, of course not. That's not how this works, either. So here's my plan moving forward.
The two stories that heavily feature Iskall in TTSBC, "Run with It' and "Carry me Home Tonight" will remain up. They are timestamped with their dates of posting which was long before any of this came out, and again, they are very clearly meant to be characters, not the creators.
Iskall will be removed from the TTSBC: Wiki, and I will not be writing any new content for his character.
Does that affect the plot of TTSBC? Yes, it does. I'm not going to pretend it doesn't, and those of you who have followed the series at length can likely see where the issues arise...but I'm an author, and I can pivot. I also have an awesome little team behind me of @silver-sunray, @boo-the-ahh, and @khoirkid who are helping me to make sure TTSBC carries on smoothly despite this unforeseen struggle.
Stress will not be removed from the TTSBC: Wiki. As I mentioned in an ask earlier, her role in the story is very minor, and I hadn't planned for her to have any other pieces to herself outside of Hermit-a-Day May anyway...so aside from specific instances where it might be necessary to mention her, she will not be making any more major appearances. This is mainly because I'm a Hermit/Traffic/Empires writer, and I plan to stick to that notion unless future events cause me to pivot otherwise.
Lastly, I would appreciate if we could avoid anymore asks about the situation. If there are any further updates I'm sure I'll find that out on my own, I'm very active in this fandom and I see things pretty quickly when they spread, so if any new things related to this situation spring up, while I greatly appreciate your concern for me and my work, please don't send it to my inbox or in DM.
I'm very saddened by this, as I'm sure many of you are. Hermitcraft and it's associated fandoms have been my safe space for many years, through some of the hardest moments of my life, and with the mess that MCYT has proven itself to be at times, it felt like we were untouchable here. But like Doc said, the Hermits are good, and they are strong. And as their fans and supporters, we need to be the same.
Be good, be strong, and let's make sure our lovely community continues to be the positive space it always has been.
-Amethyst
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Trans Feminism and the Human Domestication Guide
Or
Wishing on a misogynistic star won't make your dreams come true
Thesis: A running theme in some parts of the HDG sphere is the unintentional chase and valorisation of misogynistic standards for women in the pursuit of validation.
“The most radical thing that any of us can do is to stop projecting our beliefs about gender onto other people's behaviours and bodies”
― Julia Serano, Whipping Girl: A Transsexual Woman on Sexism and the Scapegoating of Femininity
I would like to open by declaring my own identities, both as a shield against a particular kind of bad faith criticism, but also to demonstrate that I’m operating in good faith here. I��m a fat, hairy, physically disabled, transgender, butch dyke who writes within the HDG setting with great joy and greater love for the community. I’m also hot as fuck. That established, I’ll continue:
There is a particularly pernicious lie that revolves around the state of women's bodies; that there is a correct way to have one and that those who do not meet these standards are unfeminine or otherwise worthless. It must have a vagina, of course, but it must also be white, thin, able, hairless, youthful, fit but not strong and, of course, soft.
Trans feminism, and by that I direct my attention to feminist speech within trans and gender non-conformist spaces, has managed to, if not defeat, then at least combat one of the great evils of cis sexism, the necessity of the vagina. The ongoing and necessary validation of the girl cock as beautiful, as wonderful, as feminine is a wonderful, joyful thing. We (trans feminine people) exist as part of the spectrum of womanhood, and that means that our bodies also exist within and without that spectrum of womanhood as well.
However, trans feminism of a particular kind has - rather than continue the work done to uplift the gock - has embraced a particular kind of ugly lie we’re taught. In many cases - due to a perceived desire to be as close to flawlessly woman as we can be - the focus will instead fall on a particular kind of trans feminine person who manages to engage with and evoke those standards aside from the obvious. To paraphrase Julia Serano in illustrating this point:
“Whether unconscious or deliberate, the gatekeepers clearly sought to … ensure that most people who did transition would not be “gender-ambiguous” in any way”
― Julia Serano, Whipping Girl: A Transsexual Woman on Sexism and the Scapegoating of Femininity
One of the beauties of the class-G is that it allows the character to experience their body in an idealised form. I recognise and applaud this position, it is beautiful to see a writer able to imagine themselves completely idealised, completely transformed into something that doesn’t hurt. However, therein lies the rub; the ideal depicted displays some of that ugliness, some of the roots of misogyny that thread their ways through our brains like poison and make us into useful fools for its goals.
The thought that brought about this essay is a repeated phrasing that appears across several works within the HDG milieu; that to be hairless and soft is to be feminine. A character will have their body hair, all their body hair bar that on their head, removed and thus will be made ‘girly’. They, and other characters, may remark on how much more they feel like a woman, unconsciously or consciously linking womanhood to that hairlessness.
You may note that this directly plays into another cis-sexist standard of beauty; that to be feminine requires a certain girlishness, a pubescent budding that belies the possibility of cellulite or wrinkles or the consequences of living a life where one is not simply a doll.
What is my objection to that? Surely, every writer has the right to depict their own wish fulfilment fantasies. Certainly yes, but also… one must ask at which point we celebrate their dreams and at what point we ask people to engage with their biases and question what they consider to be true. Women, all kinda of women, are hairy. Women have pubic hair, arm hair, leg hair, chest hair, even facial hair. The seeming desire to be completely hairless is as ‘unnatural’ a goal as any other, as ‘unnatural’ as any expectation set for us by the white supremacist culture most of us are steeped in. To return to whipping girl:
“Rather than question our own value judgments or notice the ways that we treat people differently based on their size, beauty, or gender, most of us reflexively react to these situations in a way that reinforces class boundaries: We focus on the presumed “artificiality” of the transformation the subject has undergone.”
― Julia Serano, Whipping Girl: A Transsexual Woman on Sexism and the Scapegoating of Femininity
It must be noted that at least part of this problem is with what the reader brings to the table. When something goes unstated, we resort to the baseline of our biases and, due to the way society is structured, that baseline is generally white, thin and physically able. Beauty and femininity are racialised concepts, and I think we fall into traps headlong that white supremacy establishes for us. I am not the person to write an essay critiquing race in HDG, but I recognise the consequences of race and the expectations of white femininity on the work. Thus, then, we must consider the text, and the text is very often pretty clear about its characters.
How many protagonists of a human domestication guide story are textually fat? How many are stated in the text to be people of colour? How many of them are, if not stated to be, then implied through lack of mention, white, and thin? These questions ignore the many that are actively identified as those things. (I will pause here to note that Dog of War - notable as the most popular piece of work in the setting - features a protagonist who is both brown and fat, and I’m extremely happy to see it).
Collectively, as writers, we have seen a future where everyone is accepted and have created a world where the depictions of acceptance come with conformity to modern misogyny. We create a world without boundaries, where a person can be digitalised or made into a dog, and our characters are still aping their ancestors of five centuries prior in seeking validation of self. We are, I would argue (and borrowing heavily from Butler), ‘uncritically mimicking the strategy of the oppressor instead of offering a different set of terms.’
This is not, I would like to be clear, an attack on any particular story. You may recognise elements of several stories in this essay, and perhaps there are particular things I am drawing on, however, this essay does not charge the product of the writer's work with anything. That body of text can exist and be critiqued, but does not exist as a thoughtful, philosophical actor. Rather, I would charge us writers, all of us, with being more thoughtful as we engage with what femininity means to us and what is and is not feminine in a world where anything is possible.
Finally, a quote from Gender Outlaw that I direct at myself as much as anyone else:
“Let's stop pretending that we have all the answers, because when it comes to gender, none of us is fucking omniscient.”
― Kate Bornstein, Gender Outlaws: The Next Generation
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🌲 !25 Days of Blockmas! 🌲
The holiday spirit is almost upon us! Starting December 1st, please enjoy this little board of activities I’ve cooked up for the MC:SM community. Blockmas features a handful of fun ways to partake in the fandom along with festive drawing prompts scattered in. Please note everything is optional and you do not have to complete every day to partake! Feel free to use the #25 Days of Blockmas tag so I can see your posts! Have fun and happy holidays!
✏️Day 1: Snow Day!
Toss characters into a nice chilly landscape, snowball fight, or the Icy Palace of Despair. Or perhaps just give them a nice cup of cocoa. ^^
Day 2: Scribble challenge!
Pick a character to draw using only one line. Once you lift your pen off the paper, that concludes the one line! (Feel free to color underneath the scribble!)
Day 3: Secret Admirer!
Slip an ask into the inboxes of your favorite creators and tell them how much their work means to you! Remind your beloved artists why they bring you comfort or inspiration, tell the writers how much their stories made you laugh or cry, etc.
✏️Day 4: Winter Clothes!
Wrap a character in a nice, snug sweater, puffy coat, scarf, or other festive apparel!
Day 5: Storytime!
Grab your blanket and start reading a fic you’ve been wanting to try for a while.
Day 6: The Good, ‘Ol Days…
Vibe and watch a playthrough of your favorite episodes of Minecraft: Story Mode. Alternatively, play the game yourself!
✏️Day 7: Ice Scream!
Turn a character into one of those cursed ice cream treats…
Day 8: AU Appreciation!
Send an ask to a creator about an AU they’ve crafted. You never know what may help them develop the story!
Day 9: Why is this here?
Slip some memes into a mutual’s inbox. Or many mutuals’ inboxes… Or a stranger’s inbox!
⭐️Day 10: Free Space!
Day 11: The Pen is Mightier…
Write a festive snippet about the holidays anywhere in the game! (Beacontown, Sky City, The Underneath, etc!)
Day 12: Kind Comments!
Leave appreciation on a few fanfics of your choice! Tell the authors how much they mean to you ^^
✏️Day 13: Cozy…
Time to keep warm during the snowstorm outside. Snuggle up in a blanket, sip some cocoa, or stay close to the fireplace!
Day 14: They would NOT say that—
Have fun with incorrect quotes or draw over images!
Day 15: Repetition!
Repeat any day of your choice or try one from the remaining list!
✏️Day 16: Gift Giving!
Share the holiday spirit with a few fun presents!
Day 17: Time Machine!
Revisit one of your favorite fics to enjoy the tale all over again.
Day 18: Classic Minecraft!
Have fun mining and crafting! Perhaps play with friends—
✏️Day 19: Ugh, Fine. <3
Give one of your least favorite characters appreciation. (It doesn’t have to be a lot. Just a small doodle will suffice.)
Day 20: Well-Deserved Break! Take a rest. The coming days will be rather artsy so get your pencils ready!
✏️Day 21: OC appreciation!
✏️Day 22: AU art!
✏️Day 23: Doodle a scene from a fic you enjoy!
✏️Day 24: Your choice!
^ For the prompts above, you may use OCs/AUs that belong to others!
🌲Day 25: Recap!
Sit back, relax and take a look at all you accomplished! Enjoy your holidays! If you would like, use this day as another optional Free Space!
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(MAY CONTAIN SPELLING MISTAKES AHEAD!!!!!!) IMPORTANT AS HELL!!!!
Chat I want to have your honest thoughts
I want to create a community specifically for Gender Neutral / trans (ftm) /male reader as there is not enough content for us or there is but doesn't get much recognition
Reasons?
- Many times I see posts that say Gender Neutral and are more inclined to fem (ex: Reader is gn but as a va. and is described as feminine) and that can cause serious disphoria for many readers who want to just read something that makes them feel safe and ok
- For trans readers, it happend that some writings were heavely not respecting trans readers (I read some stories with trans reader but AGAIN were more inclined towards fem readers :/) so I want to create this space so you don't have to worry about experiencing these unpleasant occasions
Last thing about this: you can write what you want!!! I am not saying you can't!!!!!!
.
What can you post?
Basically anything as long as YOU TAG IT TRUTHFULLY AND PUT THE WARNINGS! We do not want accidents.
Many times authors don't tag their things according to their content just to have more likes and honestly it's pretty fucked up
NOT FEMALE READER!!!! IN ANY FUCKING OCCASION!!!!
Who can join?
Anyone, readers and writers all welcome!!
If you have some questions you can comment or send an ask in my inbox! Dont feel afraid <3333
#cod x male reader#ghost x male reader#ghost x reader#kyle gaz garrick#gaz x male reader#gaz x reader#soap x male reader#soap x reader#price x male reader#price x reader#alex x male reader#graves x male reader#graves x reader#alex x reader#nikolai x reader#nikolai x male reader#keegan x reader#keegan x male reader#cod x reader#hesh x reader#hesh x male reader#logan x reader#logan x male reader#woods x male reader#woods x reader#makarov x male reader#makarov x reader#russell adler x reader#adler x male reader#konig x male reader
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genuine question about some identities
why do you think theres so much hate for people who are afab/amab and are also trans women/men, those who are cistrans and multigender people?
ive noticed that when you tell certain queer people you'd think wouldn't be exclusionist that your gender is funky and you're trans bc of it, they begin to use your assigned sex and your biology against you because "you can't be a trans woman if you have a uterus, ur just feminine".
its the same argument as conservatives make it. why is there so much hate?
ppl don't acknowledge my individual genders but instead see how they work alongside each other. ppl don't see me as a trans woman when my gender is woman but will acknowledge me as a trans man because of my sex traits.
these are some very important questions to ask, i appreciate you for sending this ask
i honestly think more people are becoming indoctrinated into transmedicalist and gender critical thinking without realizing it, and it's becoming dangerous. people want to inherently label an afab transfem and/or an amab transmasc as liars, people who are spitting in the faces of others, and shouldn't be a part of our community. other people make assumptions about others' experiences based on their own and don't understand that there is an entire world outside of their perspective, and that world is full of experiences they have no hope of understanding, but can simply accept.
i've gotten a lot of questions about whether afab trans women and amab trans men can exist, it's definitely a hot button issue right now, and i agree with you. if you ask me, afab trans women and amab trans men deserve to have a platform to speak from. if someone genuinely believes their identity is trans no matter what their AGAB is- who the hell am i to stop them? it's important for afab trans women and amab trans men to not speak over their other siblings and try to speak for what it's like to be intersex or an amab trans woman/afab trans man. but that doesn't mean that these people can't exist- they deserve the right to talk about their experience, because it exists alongside the experiences of amab trans women and afab trans men. they're not fighting with each other, they're unique experiences that belong under the same umbrella.
at the end of the day, someone standing there being an afab trans woman, an amab trans man, or a cistrans person is not hurting anyone. the identity itself will hurt no one. ignorance about what other trans people experience is dangerous, and so is speaking over others, but these identities in and of themselves are not harming anyone. it is very possible to go "i don't understand how that works, but if that is how they identify, then i will respect that."
between people becoming indoctrinated into radical feminism and people who are proudly adopting gender critical politics, there is a schism in our communities that don't need to be there. people think they need to "weed out the fakes" in order for us to be accepted by cishet society, which is just not how any of this works. we can't cast aside the queers who are "too weird" or "not really queer" in order to try to make the rest of the community look legitimate
this community has always been here for people whose identities don't line up with the cisheteronormative binary. it doesn't matter what someone's AGAB is- i mean, isn't that the point of the trans community? are we not the "i don't give a shit about your AGAB, i want to know who you really are" community? it's become honestly scary to see how focused the queer community has become on AGAB. people are utterly obsessed with trying to figure out the AGABs of strangers in order to deny them access to queer spaces or kick them out of spaces they rightfully belong in
and it bothers me deeply that people police the identities of multigender people beyond belief. it's like having 1 trans identity is okay but if you dare to have more than one, you're not really queer or whatever. cistrans people, multigender people who are cis, trans wo/men who consider both their manhood and womanhood trans no matter what their AGAB is, transfemmasc/transmascfem people... these identities belong and yet people proudly and gladly wake up every day to do conservatives' jobs for them.
whenever you police another queer person's identity, no matter what your intention is, good, bad or something else- you are doing conservatives' jobs for them. you are not preserving our community. you are not keeping identities sacred or safe or whatever the hell. you're gladly sucking up to our oppressors and spreading their propaganda. it's disturbing how people don't realize this
thank you for taking the time to send this ask, i agree with you 100%. this behavior has gotten out of control and it's time for people to wake the fuck up and realize they've been indoctrinated into transmedicalism, radical feminism, and being gender critical. this isn't the "right" way to behave. it's antithetical to the very foundations of the queer community.
#asks#answers#afab trans woman#amab trans man#amab trans men#amab transmasc#amab transmasculine#afab transfem#afab transfemme#afab transfeminine#multigender#cistrans
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i love how everyone comes to you to ask questions and the way you answer them all is so sweet. your so helpful and genuine which is so nice to see especially on a community like this. its good to know we can have friendly and caring people to support us even with the suffering. i love you and your blog and i hope you have an amazing day! 💖
I try to help as much as I can, I truly love how people find my blog as a safe space<3
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idk when i’ll get to this but i want to get a couple cute little cloud shaped shelves to set up my neopets toys on, and a star shaped corkboard for the pins
#i have to ask if i can use a communal space for it ^^;#there just isnt anywhere in my room for shelves sticking out like that and i do t want to use the bookshelf#bc i have some little prints to go up on the wall too#i want to buy some official neopets hard figures too#so my halloween kacheek from synthaphone isnt alone
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you were raised in comparison.
it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.
you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.
you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.
what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.
it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.
you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.
you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?
a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.
you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.
it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.
something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.
#writeblr#warm up#my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky#i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles#yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help#for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT#and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen#than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say#''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help#i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.''#bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't#actually offer fair support to everyone#we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less.#and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help#bc i DID have it better than other people#and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help.#we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn#instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself
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Okay I’m going to say it, some of y’all treat the KOTLC tag like it’s a tumblr community instead of an organization system that gathers together everything people post and tag as KOTLC
#unless something has absolutely nothing to do with kotlc#no one is in their right to tell you to not tag something at kotlc. just so you know.#you can’t clog up a tag. that’s not a THING#no one talks about this in bigger fandoms. we only have this problem bc it’s a small fandom and people are used to going to the tag#to find the content they want#and if they aren’t finding the content they want too bad so sad.#like I’m not saying you can just tag whatever as kotlc#but if it’s about kotlc in any way. you are well within your right to tag it as such.#Im ALL FOR properly tagging. like don’t improperly tag. that’s just mean#and that DOES interrupt tags :/#but there’s no way for you to post too much about any one topic#the kotlc tag is NOT a curated space. it’s not a place of all these assorted kotlc posts in similar formats#it’s a space for everything tagged as kotlc#so unless you look at the post and are like ‘this doesn’t even mention kotlc or any of its characters???’#you can scroll along your merry way!#kotlc#it’s something that’s come up in both the right and wrong contexts#during tam cam people told ppl talking about just the identity stuff to keep it out of the kotlc tag and that was CORRECT bc that wasn’t#about kotlc. but also during tam cam people put in my ask box that there were too many tam cam meme posts and that they were clogging up#the tag. to which I say A) I was only making like a quarter of those and B) those have to do with kotlc so you can suck it up! in the end I#didn’t respond. but yeah. i get that there’s a time and place for us to be like hey that doesn’t belong here#but whether or not something belongs in the tag has NOTHING to do with how much you want to see it or how many posts are being made about it#thank you and have a nice day. and if you want a curated space of similarly formatted kotlc posts you should make a community#Ik our tag often functions like one bc we are a small fandom. but we are NOT entitled to that.
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Thank you for that Fallout post. I'm a trans man living in Texas and i'm ND and legally disabled, i'm home a lot, but i use media and other hobbies to help cope with my issues and struggles and it works well. i'm healthy about it too.
however i come here onto tumblr and i see some of the most vile and inflammatory shit that could very easily trigger or cause distress in someone over video games. and then to be made to feel like i'm somehow the one in the wrong who had hurtful and upsetting things shown and said to me for simply... playing a game and liking a certain character? i just mostly feel intimidated into silence and i largely avoid the fallout community on here because i dont agree with any of that, and also that i'm not allowed to like or even discuss certain character for fear of being told i'm some evil fucked up person when i didn't do anything bad to begin with.
I’m glad it resonated with you and I’m sorry you feel shut out by trying to engage with a piece of media you enjoy. It really is a shame how much puritan culture invading fandom spaces has ostracized people who just use these things as a creative outlet or to stay connected with a community. It shouldn’t feel like pulling teeth trying to have discussions about liking characters who aren’t “Good People”. I know this is an issue that’s been cropping up in a lot of different spaces, but I notice it much more with things like Fallout because a) I just spend more time in the Fallout community and b) there’s virtually no way to ignore the fact that dystopian fiction involves some moral gray area. We’re all just trying to play in a space together and making it into a moral competition cultivates a really isolating, hostile environment.
#there’s a part of me that’s like. almost nostalgic for how fandom spaces used to function#but that might also be based around my personal experiences snd perception of how fandom used to be#anyway tho. wishing you well anon i hope you find people who can play in the space with you without being weird about it#and it does suck feeling like you can’t even mention liking specific characters otherwise it becomes a mark on your tumblr permanent record#I’ve met a lot of people in this community who are cool about it but it’s usually like… done in private conversations or small servers#hard to have public discussions#which it’s so strange to me considering tumblr is notoriously the Villain Liker website#im a little tired so im not sure my thoughts are totally cohesive. hopefully all of that makes sense#asks
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Thinking of adding a new name to my collection, though Lapis will remain primary. Current prominent contenders are Liegia, Carnelia, Coquina, and also my 2nd birth name, Rabiya. Thoughts?
#What I mean by 2nd birth name is that the current legal name I go by was… my family’s 4th attempt at naming me.#My first name was Muhammad as a boy was expected/anticipated but since I’m AFAB; that went out the door.#So Rabiya was next. And then another name that I hold so dear I won’t mention it.#I love that 3rd name but alas it wasn’t the one we settled it. So now I have another. That one’s… boring though. Overused. Not a fan.#But Rabiya is nice!#I used to go by it in 2021 back when I was first a part of the community here.#Different spelling but same name.#Someone mispronounced it horribly in call once and so CONFIDENTLY too. I just decided I can’t do it anymore. Too white of a space for that.#For the record? It’s Ra-Bay-Yea. Not Rah-BYE-yeah.#Anyway yeah! No wonder I have identity issues now haha. 4th try is… not the charm; let me tell you that!#Lapis is better. Almandine is better.#I can’t really misspeak about it irl as it holds religious significance to the community but this is MY blog so.#here? I can do as I like.#that third name they gave me was. really pretty though; unique too. I use it as a nickname irl.#No-one asked for that rant but oh well. So Rabiya; Carnelia (Carnelian gemstone); Coquina (sedimentary rock) or Liegia (Deftones)?#✧.*🌹
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hey! I love your blog and the things you post. I wanted to say that if you have questions about Halakhah or about anything else that is related to Judaism, I would love to help you! I'm not pretending to be a rabbi or something, but I know alot about Judaism. keep in mind that I'm an ortodox jew and not a conservative)
Orthodox jews 🤝 Every other jews
People I love with all my heart 🩵🩵🩵
(And thank you! 😭)
#ask#jumblr#jew by choice#jewish conversion#personal thoughts tag#this blog loves orthodoxy and i am really grateful for the kindness i've been shown by a VAST array of jews#from reform to conservative to orthodox to unaligned i have been shown so much love and i want to give that love back😭😭#i never know how to respond to this kindness but i want to make sure y'all do know how beautiful and how much i love your lives and judaism#i love seeing how vast - how differently each jew lives and observes and thinks about judaism#i love seeing all of them no matter if i completely agree. it isn't ABOUT agreement!!#we are united ultimately by that love and care - by the community outreach and intercommunity support#we become united when we reach across those superficial bridges in order to embrace each other#and that's what i love about judaism. because you notice how often that theme comes up?#humans can be bad about that! about reaching across bridges. and i know some of us need to learn how to love and BE loved#being loved is just as much a skill as loving and yet it's a skill we often aren't taught in tandem with learning HOW to love#anyway. rant has ranted long enough. but i just wanted to talk about this because judaism often does get this right#and i want this blog to be a safe and loving space for as many jews as humanly possible. because i love judaism and jews...#...and they are my INHERENT equal which will never change. it will never change that this will be what i think...#...and i'm saying that as confidently as i can because i want and try to put the work in to learn to love and be loved by jews
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I have a greyhound and one (absolutely insane) grey/wolfhound mix and I’ve always wondered if Borzoi have similar personalities to greyhounds? Obsessed with your dogs btw, love their curly little butts 😭😭😭
Their butts are obsessed with you too
I think greyhounds and borzoi probably have the most similar personalities in general within the sighthound family! With the caveat different lines and different individual dogs can vary greatly.
A general like of people but not pushy about it, eccentric and funny at home. Enjoy couches and chilling tf out. Do well in “packs” granted their personal space and boundaries are respected.
The biggest differences are gonna be size and hair! Oh and greyhounds are more fragile in skin and bone. Borzoi are a bit hardier in those regards (HOWEVER a borzoi whomst wasn’t grown out properly WILL have weaker bones and be more prone to breaks). I’d say these differences aren’t overly significant if you aren’t doing lure coursing/open field tho.
Greyhound peeps feel free to sound off ✌🏻
#dogblr#petblr#sighthound#ask#text post#I was very tempted by greyhounds when I didn’t have a yard for a baby zoi#but other life stuff came up before I could go that route#and when I had a space in my apartment Charlie worked out so here I am#I prefer long hair#and love giant dogs#so borzoi are it for me#but if you like the idea of a borzoi but aren’t there#greyhounds are great#they USED to be much much easier to get your hands on#but between the Florida racing ban and a couple prolific borzoi bybs….#if you’re willing to pay Ivanhoe like 3k you can get a borzoi anytime rofl#Ivanhoe is the most prolific but there are also bybs in CO and Texas#and plenty of random people doing one off litters#but you don’t know to know until you’re in the breed and community#the bybs are pretty good at looking like they aren’t byb#or checking off a lot of the internet’s good breeder boxes#when they don’t check off really any boxes of a good BORZOI breeder
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"lesbians can be attracted to men" do you fucking hear yourself
#im going to go insane#tired!!!!!!! im so tired!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#imno tbeing nice anymore if you believe in thsi do not follow or interact with me.#the INSISTENCE of including MEN IN THIS FUCKING IDENTITY#cant we just have something . pklease . pleas ethats all im asking#and i dont mean it in a 'lets separate ourselves from the lgbt community!" way to be fucking clear#im just tired of thsi shit#'oh but it used to be an umbrella term!'#cool. things can and will change#we deserve our own identity we deserve our space we deserve our own term#fucking so tired#mine#my talking tag#text#'oh but biromantic homosexuals and vice versa exist!' then just sya t hat😭😭😭
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