#i have that headcanon

[mountainshroom]

If she has no fans call the ambulance cause I am dead

[o0kawaii0o]

Getting ready for the party 💃

[business-as-usual-bats]

Read a fanfic where Tim Drake thinks Bruce ignored his birthday, then on some random day was like, "Happy Birthday, Tim!" And Tim was like, "It's not my birthday...?" And Bruce was like, "Uh, according to your birth certificate it is, though?"

And the birth certificate shows a date with a different month and day than Tim thought was his birthday, and he realized his parents just FORGOT when his birthday was and essentially picked either a random day or a day more convenient for their schedules or a day they could remember better-

Tim, this whole time, had a completely different birthday than what he'd been celebrating his whole life, and he is so MAD. Like no shit his life doesn't make any goddamm sense he's been a fucking Pisces this whole time

[gilsart]

math nation does this happen to you too

[daydreamerwonderkid]

Bruce used Awkward Flirtation. It's a Critical Hit!

Reference under cut

[nouverx]

"I want to eat you" is their love language and you can't change my mind

[olailamajnoon]

Bruce, who has a problem expressing emotions because he was teased for them in school as the "crazy Wayne kid"

Bruce, who used to clutch Alfred at night and wet himself due to his nightmares.

Bruce, who got flashbacks till his mid-twenties everytime he walked down an alley.

Bruce, who would hug a weeping Dick Grayson and stay with him until the night terrors were over, humming a soft lullaby that Bruce's mother sang for him

Bruce, who hardened his mouth and his life to keep the anger in check after Jason, because he knew if he didn't every criminal would pay.

Bruce, who sees Damian chopping up shrubbery and thinks "I was far worse as a child inside, it's a good thing he's letting it out"

Bruce, who can't walk by a homeless child in the street without calling his special Wayne Foundation liaison (who he keeps on speed dial) and asking her to find "one more spot"

Bruce, who sees Selina petting kittens and robbing the rich and thinks "if I could have had a life with her, that would have been nice"

Bruce, who looks at Cass' x-rays and sees her knit bones and swears to god he will break the bones of whoever's responsible for her upbringing

Bruce, who gives Tim projects that he himself can do faster because he sees attention-starved Tim trying to please him

Bruce, who looks at Clark smiling and thinks of what he can buy for his birthday to make him smile just like that.

Bruce to his parents in their graves after not being able to catch a criminal: I'm sorry. I've failed you. I'll try harder.

People who don't know Bruce: why is that man so unfeeling.

Bad DC writers: idk just that way i guess

[novaneondream]

Anyways what kind of music do you think Eri listens to

[raphaerolo]

What if a Jedi's eyes glowed to match their lightsaber tho

[redactedrem]

Headcanon where after so many arguments between the batkids and Bruce over his paranoia and complete disregard for his kids privacy, the entire family had compromised with (in the healthiest way possible) downloading life360 on their phones and that's how they all keep track of each other.

Now Bruce knew that this is mostly for his benefit and is supposed to be a healthy alternative for his unhealthy paranoia and helicopter parenting, but what he wasn't expecting was for his kids to start keeping track of him.

He's putting gas in his car and Dick calls him because apparently Dick has been watching him drive around on the app? And Bruce is currently at a gas station thats right around the corner from a Taco Bell and now Dick wants him to get food for everyone since he's already there.

He's driving home from a meeting and Steph calls him because her and Duke were shopping in the area and wants to know if he can pick them up, when he asks how she knew he was on the same street, he gets a "Oh I just like to stalk everyone on the app for funsies." as an answer.

Jason calls him and he can barely get out a hello before Jason cuts him off, "Bruce why the fuck is your phone battery on 5%, charge your damn phone" which completely stuns him because why does he know that. He clears his throat before answering. "Jason, what?"

"Everyone can see each others phone batteries on '360, now charge your phone." Is all he gets before Jason hangs up on him.

[heavenbarnes]

thinking about your older bf!simon that cannot cope with being far from you.

when you’re in the shower, he’s sat on the lid of the toilet on his phone (watching those rug cleaning videos) enjoying your faint singing under the stream of water, the smell of your body wash on the cloud of steam- ready to pass you a towel or get your back.

when you’re at your desk, working from home or studying, he’s just on the other side of it reading the paper with one outstretched leg tangled with both of yours. he’s dead quiet when you’re on a call, just happy to be around.

when you’re doing laundry, collecting the clothes in the hamper and crouching to stuff them into the washer- turning around and accidentally colliding with a thick wall of muscle.

“sorry, love”

he steps aside but you can hear his soft footfalls as he continues to follow you throughout your home.

when you’re both watching something on the couch, what starts as his pinky locked with yours turns into his arm around your waist. that turns into your head on his chest, which culminates with you falling asleep in his lap with his cheek on your head and soft snores emanating from his lips.

when you grocery shop, you push the trolley but his chest is to your back, arms either side of you and hands clasped over yours on the handle. you can thank his military training for his uncanny ability to tell exactly when you’ll stop walking.

when he wakes up in the middle of the night, on a rare occasion when you’ve managed to slip out of bed without him realising, he’s immediately in a panic calling your name.

“in here, my love”

as soon as his heart settles, he realises the bathroom light was probably a dead giveaway. you’re taking a wee, you’ll be back in a minute.

that doesn’t stop a sleepy simon from leaning in the doorframe, shielding his eyes from the big light as he waits for you to finish up.

even on the short walk back to bed, you can feel fingers twisted in the back of your shirt- almost like you’re leading the way.

minute you’re both on the mattress, you’re being wrapped up in his arms, slotting you perfectly into the curve of his front- almost like you’re made for him.

(and you are)

[mellosdrawings]

I've been thinking about teen!Crewel too much recently.

[technically-human]

First meeting

[yizhouism]

i feel like caleb would pray long and hard for your first child to be a girl—an except replica of you

jokes on him though! because not only is his first child a son, but his son also came out looking exactly like him: dark hair, purple eyes, the slant of his nose. it was like looking at mirror image of himself, except... oh... he had your smile. needless to say, caleb was smitten with his son. he still wanted a girl though!

the second time around, you and caleb were still not blessed with a daughter. and although your second son was all you in appearance, he was all caleb in personality, which of course meant that your second son was a mama's boy through and through!

he wanted to be everywhere you were at all times. your second son clung to you like a koala, crying every time caleb came near because that meant that your attention wouldn't be on him but his father. obviously, caleb wasn't having any of that and so came the long and hard months of setting boundaries with your second child

eventually (and with your eldest playing as mediator) they found some common ground! doesn't mean that they don't butt heads though, but it's all affectionate and part of their love-hate dynamic

your third child was finally the daughter caleb had prayed for. and while she wasn't a mini you, she was the perfect blend of you and caleb—a testament to your love and partnership

as the princess of the family, she was spoiled like spoiled spoiled, more spoiled than you ever were. how could she not when she had two brothers that spoiled her to death AND a father who was an absolute simp for her?

despite all that, her favourite man wasn't any of them, but instead her uncle zayne! when asked why she'd furrow her brows and say that her brothers and father smothered her too much. but late at night she'd whisper in your ear and say that uncle zayne was pretty, really pretty

needless to say the one-sided rivalry between caleb and zayne (and your sons and zayne's son) only intensified 😞

[wally-lake]

*Markiplier voice* WAS THAT THE BITE OF 87!?!?!?

Dunno wanted to draw how Michael + his friends/the bullies reacted after the chomp.

what a day that must've been for those kids