#i have so much mental and creative energy and it has to go somewhere

[itsmyfix]

damn. it’s really just the fact that jkr ACTUALLY WROTE THEM LIKE THAT. like when you really look at it, there are SO many instances throughout the WHOLE series that shows this homoerotic deeply repressed relationship between two boys in the nineties enduring SEVERE childhood trauma in a way that literally NO ONE ELSE can relate to. like i could write a dissertation on this shit i’m not even kidding.

she may not have made it canon but that’s what she fucking wrote.

and like, anyone else think she’s a little TOO homophobic for it NOT to not wreak of homosexual repression? just saying, in some way shape or form her subconscious saw that relationship and created it.

because at the end of the day, as a writer i can tell you, THAT’S who makes these stories. the writer’s subconscious. it always knows what the storyline is before the author themselves know what it is.

so yes she may not consciously accept their relationship, but whether it develops in the universe she wrote or not- you can’t deny they had some weird repressed feelings for each other. like in a gay way.

and all that is to say— how repressed do you gotta be to be that even your creator is repressed?? that is some gay ass shit right there.

[lazybutsmexy]

Tea

Simón "Ghost" Riley X GN!reader

Warnings: ANGST, hurt no comfort, mayor character death(s).

A/N: is... is this what I chose as my comeback? I'm sorry, I hope to be able to write something fluffy soon.

Read on AO3

"...Ghost?"

"...Yeah?"

Your eyes are locked to the sky. The hues of gray that prelude an autumn shower used to comfort you. Strangely enough, what's most comforting to you at this moment is hearing your Lieutenant's voice answer you back, from somewhere to your left.

"...I have a confession to make."

"...Go on."

You inch your head sideways, trying to peek a glance at his face, but the stiffness of your neck prevent you from doing so. Maybe it's for the best. From the corner of your eye you can see part of his hip and his right leg, over a carpet of dark red that you don't need a creative imagination to think about its nature, or its origin.

You saw him get shot.

"I'm the one that took your last tea bag," you offer, "I'm sorry, I didn't know you'd get so grumpy about it."

A low sigh reaches your ears, and you can catch the hint of an almost imperceptible stutter in his breathing.

"...Never suspected you," he hums, every word calculated as if it could be his last -it may as well be, "you don't drink tea."

"No, I don't," you agree, "but you do." Your lower lip gets caught in between your teeth once again, as it has happened for the last few- minutes? Hours? Who knows anymore? "I wanted to surprise you with-... with a cuppa when we got to t-the safehouse..."

You clearly should've followed his example and kept your sentences short, you think as your diaphragm painfully struggles to keep your lungs filled with oxygen.

"...You make shit tea though," he grumbled - now you can clearly hear the wheeze hidden in his breathing.

"... would've made it wi' luv," your tongue feels heavy in your mouth, and you try not to think of the amount of time you've gradually lost sensation in your body. Instead, you try to peek at him again as you hear a slow ruffle of movement, and this time an ungloved hand comes to your field of vision.

Open face up. Inviting.

You don't think twice and muster whatever little strength you have in your body to move your left hand closer to his.

If the struggle makes you tear up, you don't care. If your pained whimpers break his heart, he doesn't comment on it.

He just grasps your hand as soon as there's skin-on-skin contact, thankful that there's still warmth on your fingers.

Fading, but still there.

"...Didn't say... I wouldn't drink it."

"...Yer' too kind, sir..." Your ears feel like padded in cotton, but you can still hear yourself. If you had any energy - or air in your lungs - you would laughed at how much you started sounding like Soap. "...'s an hon'r to be wi' you, Lt..."

Several seconds passed in silence, and you think you won't get any more answers, and mentally prepare yourself to close your eyes one last time.

But there's something happening with your hand in his.

One squeeze.

Pause.

Another squeeze.

And a last one.

"... waited too long to tell you," his voice reaches you again, watery and choked up, " hope tis' works..."

Go figure, you still had tears to shed. Or is it the rain droplets finally landing on your skin? You don't know. You don't care.

You try to reciprocate, but can only apply three soft squeezes with the pads of your thumb on the soft muscle between his thumb and index fingers.

The choked up sob you hear is a good guess that he received your reply.

"...'m sleepy," your whisper reaches him, and he mourns the lost time.

He's never void of regrets, isn't he?

"...g'night, luv," he tries to sound warm to you, always.

"...g'night, Simon..."

Oh, how sweet his name sounds, coming from your lips in a whisper.

Taglist: @warenai @queen-of-hearts-lemon-tarts @embers-of-alluring

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[peatbogbody]

i'm gonna write essays for each member and since i started with seonghwa i might as well go in age order so next up is joong

the first time i looked up ateez on kprofiles, which i think was during guerilla promos hongjoong immediately jumped out at me just from looking at the pfp (a crazy intense side profile of him with that half n half ponytail. kudos to whichever site editor picked thay). he just radiates Cool.

found the picture! right gif is by @ crimsonzia

he is honestly such a talented rapper. much has been said about kpop rappers as a group, much of it true, but he is just genuinely so good. i'm not a rap expert, just an appreciator, and again i'm lamenting my inability to understand korean to really be able to hear his bars but just in terms of flow and style he's really smooth. you can tell the man has taste in hip hop too, a true appreciator.

meanwhile he's also a not-so-stealth all-rounder, he's a fantastic dancer and performer, and adds a crazy level of intensity to performances that would be like a gaping hole if he weren't here. he's not part of the Demon Line for nothing. not to mention the guitar-playing and also being a great SINGER? i heard somewhere that he will actually fill in for jongho's parts occasionally in scenarios where for whatever reason jh can't be there (no specific source but i believe it). crazy.

gif by @ tyudeongie

i would LOVE to just sit and hear him gush to me about music. i wanna make music WITH him. even though sh is my bias as a performer, hongjoong is who i'd be the most interested to actually meet and talk with. i think he's who i would get along with the best as well. (yes i'm the freak who instead of normal parasocial fantasies like "wanting to date them" has things like "i wanna be their colleague" or "i want them to infodump for hours about their hobbies to me".)(sidenote that i also think my (un)tidiness habits would give sh a conniption and so we just wouldn't work out)

as a mentally complicated weirdo nerd i'm magnetically pulled to other mentally complicated weirdo nerds, especially those with a creative streak, and it's the primary type of person i tend to get along with. yeah i have totally bought into the assessment of joongie as being some kind of nd (an observation borrowed from @storkmuffin). anyways brb unironically donning a "normal people scare me" shirt fishnet arm sleeves and black eyeliner. but yeah i just love a weird little guy--sidenote though he is really not that little yall are playing he is extremely average. he's still 6in taller than me. the short kings title stays firmly in stray kids' hands--anyways yeah i just think hes neat.

in contrast with how cool he looks in performance mode he's got an awkwardness to him offstage, bordering on loser energy, that i just find SO endearing (yeah probably partly the neurodivergency at work again). another same hat! moment for me though i don't think my cool side is quite on his level. im just awkward. to me it seems clear he became an idol because he wants to make music and not the other way around. just sooo single-minded and he constantly says and does stuff that just make me go "NERD". in the asmr interview vid he did, the interviewers were asking him about his hobbies and he was like *sheepish* "i mostly just write songs tbh" but then he was like "BUT! before i came to this interview! i managed to watch a whole episode of a tv drama!" and genuinely sounded so proud of himself for doing like, a normal "fun" thing and like. mood. but it was very freaking cute. (link to vid, that part is around the 1:33 mark)

there is a darker/more serious/sadder side to him too that is more than i want to add to this post rn, but is just another layer that draws my attention and makes the parasociality go brr

i do genuinely love his unit with seonghwa, the pairing of two ruthlessly ambitious people who are also just extremely weird (in different ways) but also quite caring and thoughtful to the people around them? your honor i love them. MATZ the song portraying MATZ the unit as serial (good guy?) arsonists is just...chef's kiss. perfect tbh.

let's all agree to never ask this man to look at another lego in his life though

he's someone i can 100% see as going places after/outside of ateez, maybe writing/producing and i'm quite excited to see what that looks like

next up yunho! it's almost completely written i just need to finish adding some links and pictures.

[kakiastro]

Neptune Pisces 29°

Pisces rules over Jellyfish

I don’t see too many astrologers talking about this transit.

Neptune has been at the 29° and this signifies we are truly at end of an era!

Neptune entered Pisces in 2011 and will leave next year in 2025.

Neptune represents the collective subconscious, spirituality, creative downloads, isolation, the ocean, our mental health, hospitals

29°(Leo degree) is known “anaretic degree” this degree rules over ending of cycles. This leo shines light on what we are finishing up learning.

So what does this mean a a collective?

-oh hunny we are healing! We as a collective have been dealing with serious discussions regarding mental health. People have become more open about it now compared to past generations.

-addictions of all kinds has also been a huge topic these last 14 years! We’ve seen/heard or even know people are working to become sober, have been sober or struggling with it.

-hospital stays, the pandemic literally happened during this transit. Pisces rules over immune diseases and mucus. Isolation, we were quarantined and isolated from the people. Pisces rules over isolation.

-the ocean! Chile.. the orcas. Billionaires passing away in the ocean trying to see the titanic and there’s a new cruise ship that’s set to embark next year. There’s been recalls on fish, heavy rain falls.

-spirituality! Astrology has become mainstream and somewhat normalized especially in the Pluto Sag generation. Even if you’re not into astrology, I’ve seen people become reiki healers, holistic healers. With Uranus being in Taurus, natural healing remedies are popular. Spiritual retreats or just vacationing near water destinations have been popular

-scams! With spirituality becoming mainstream, here comes the cons and frauds. Pisces rules over frauds. Not just in the spiritual community but in a religious communities. With Saturn in Pisces , so much corruption has been brought to light. “Are you in this to enlighten the masses or your pockets?” This is the question that Saturn is checking to see. With Neptune at 29°, this is what we are ending and clearing.

You know what else I’ve noticed? So many spiritual folks leaving and joining religion such as Christianity being the biggest one I’ve noticed. This is interesting because Pisces is connected to Christianity, it’s said Yeshua(Jesus) is connected to Pisces. I’ve also noticed the other side of this where religious people are becoming more spiritual. It’s been an interesting phenomenon to witness as an astrologer and connecting the dots!

-the afterlife! Pisces rules the spirit realm, so many people are embracing there spiritual gifts, even the non believers are starting to believe in something that’s bigger than themselves. Past lives! More people are becoming fascinated with reincarnation and who they might’ve been in past lives. Pisces rules over past lives

-the truth! Chile..what is the truth??? Everyone has their own version of it and reality is somewhere in lost in the sauce, where all just winging it hoping for the best. That’s Pisces energy! Timelines is a huge topic, what timeline are you on? Pisces doesn’t have time because it’s boundless. It’s the void and smoke and mirrors lol

-celebrity! Chile…. The topic of celebrity worship has become a huge topic of discussion and how unhealthy it is. Chapelle Roan is the recent celebrity that’s setting boundaries with fans, I believe she’s a Pisces too lol. Pisces rules over glamour and idols. Hollywood is a Sun 12h(Pisces house). Celebs are people who bleed, eat and shit like us. They just have nicer toilets than us 🤪. I don’t think it’ll ever go away because celebrity worship have been around forever but we are more self aware at how unhealthy it is!!! Also, think of the celebs who have talked about how tough the industry really is.

These are just some of the themes and topics I’ve seen the last 14 years , even more so in the last few lol.

Neptune enters Aries March 30 , 2025 and will stay until 2039! The energy flip is going to be crazy! Pisces is a heavy water sign, so that’s why the energy feels like the your trying to swim through a 100 foot wave lol. Baby that Aries energy is going to be coming in like a wild fire!!

Look up the song “ante up” by M.o.p. That’s the vibe lol. I’ll make another post on Neptune Aries at another date’

Now for you personally, the house Pisces rules in your chart is your own individual story with this transit. Think of it as your own book.

Neptune rules over fantasy, what was theme of your story, who was the side characters that helped you on your mission? What did you learn on your quest? Neptune is the start of your new book and new story.

I’m open for readings! Have a beautiful day y’all!!!

[snnynaturalarch]

with  this  day  being  so  stressful with the elections,  i  wanted  to  say  a  few  things.  my  mental  health  has  been  shit  this  entire  year,  especially  this  october.  but  with  my  birthday  coming  up  on  the  12th,  i  wanted  to  give  some  shoutouts  if  that's  alright.  <3

my  meg  bun  out  there  somewhere  -  idk  where  you  are  bitch,  but  you  know  you're  getting  this  shoutout  one  way  or  another.  first  of  all…  we've  known  each  other  for  like….  four  years?????  WILD  AF.  we've  been  through  a  hella  lot  together.  ESPECIALLY�� this  year.  but  you  know  what?  we  came  back  stronger  than  ever  and  i  am  so  fucking  proud  of  us.  now  this  has  been  the  roughest  year  for  me.  especially  october,  but  you've  been  there  while  i  cried  typing  to  you.  not  to  mention,  you  have  your  own  shit  as  well.  we're  going  through  it  bestie,  but  we  are  going  through  it  together.  honestly,  i  feel  like  we  are  closer  than  before  and  i  just  fucking  love  you  so  much.  i  adore  you.  i  smooch  your  forehead.  i  cradle  you  in  my  arms.  you're  so  incredibly  important  to  me  and  that's  not  changing  bitch.  deleted  or  not,  YOU  IS  HERE  IN  MY  HEART  <3

@gccdgraces  -  MY  RIDE  OR  FUCKING  DIE!!  my  day  one  baby  guurrll!!  the  way  you  have  been  there  for  me  through  so  much  bullshit,  i  can't  thank  you  enough.  i  don't  fucking  deserve  you.  you  have  seen  me  at  my  worst  and  never  left  my  side.  i  admire  you  so  fucking  much.  your  brain  is  so  fucking  creative,  i  don't  know  how  you  fucking  do  it.  but  i  continue  to  watch  in  awe.  you  are  truly  one  of  my  best  friends.  one  day,  i  will  see  your  face  in  person  and  i  will  tackle  the  shit  out  of  you  alright????  my  fucking  best  friend.  my  fucking  angel.  my  platonic  soulmate.  i  don't  know  how  i  can  survive  this  hellsite  without  you.  not  talking  to  you  for  a  month  was  TORTURE  BESTIE!!!  let's  never  do  it  again,  alright???  NEVER  AGAIN!  there  is  a  lot  more  that  i  can  say  about  you,  but  we  will  keep  it  short.  i  love  you.  you  are  my  ride  or  die.  and  we  will  continue  together  on  this  crazy  thing  called  life.

@offorester / @stanfordprepped / @he11fireclubtm / @vamp1r3barb13  -  SAMANTHA!!  SAMMY!!!  SAMMIKINS!!!  SAMMYOOOOO!!!  bitch  wtf,  we've  known  each  other  for  two  years  now??  i  could  be  wrong.  i'm  not  good  at  math.  either  way,  i  fucking  love  you  to  death.  we  both  are  always  in  a  bad  mental  head  space  at  the  same  time,  but  at  least  we  go  through  it  together  kJBRESGB  you  are  too  fucking  precious  for  this  world.  you  care  so  much  about  everyone  and  give  your  all  constantly.  i  don't  know  if  i  have  ever  met  someone  so  fucking  kind  until  i  met  you.  you  remain  one  of  my  besties  and  i  promise  to  never  leave  your  side  <3

@wavrlynatural / @safestkittykatintown  -  my  little  bumbling  bee!!!  i  had  no  idea  how  close  we  would  get,  but  i  am  so  glad  that  we  did!!!  i  can't  even  imagine  life  without  you  now!  you  are  one  of  the  kindest  and  sweetest  souls.  heart  of  fucking  gold  honestly.  throughout  this  hiatus,  you  have  sent  so  many  check  ins  even  when  i  didn't  have  the  energy  to  respond,  just  know  it  meant  the  fucking  world  to  me.  it  still  does.  know  that  i  ain't  going  anywhere  bb  <3  you  stuck  with  me  for  LIFE.  literally  the  alex  to  my  sonny.  i  hope  you  know  just  how  much  i  am  obsessed  with  the  little  world  we  created  together  and  our  friendship.  like  dude…….you  are  so  important  to  me  now.  that's  not  changing  ever.

@broknfeed  -  i  know  you  are  on  a  hiatus  bitch  BUT  HOLY  FUCK!!!  the  fact  you  were  there  when  i  first  joined  indie  and  you  were  preggers???  and  then  you  disappeared  because  parental  duties,  but  then  came  back  after  idk  how  many  years  and  looked  for  me???  DUDE!!!  THAT  IS  SOME  WILD  SOULMATE  SHIT  RIGHT  THERE!!!  the  fact  you're  one  of  my  day  ones  is  wild  af  to  me!  but  i  am  so  fucking  grateful!  also  how  you've  always  checked  up  on  me  during  my  hiatus??  i  have  so  much  love  for  you  that  i  could  just  absolutely  BURST!  i  am  genuinely  so  glad  we  are  back  in  touch  and  just  continuing  to  grow  in  our  friendship.  if  only  we  weren't  hours  away  from  each  other,  i'd  tackle  you  kjrebsgjkbekrg  i  love  you  so  fucking  much  my  bean! 

@bloodsalted / @safetypinned  -  dixon  my  lil  spicy  vanilla  gjresbgkrejg  can  i  just  scream  about  how  much  i  love  you??  cause  i  will!  i  was  so  nervous  when  we  first  started  talking,  but  now???  i  still  get  anxious  kBRKSEJGEJ  why??  cause  you  are  so  fucking  talented  and  i  just??  like  bitch??  how  tf  do  you  do  it??  outside  of  your  talents,  you  have  done  nothing  but  welcome  me  with  open  arms  into  your  life  and  we  have  learned  so  much  about  each  other.  not  only  that,  but  you've  been  there  for  me  when  i  have  been  feeling  shitty  and  i  am  so  fucking  grateful  for  it.  you  have  no  fucking  clue.  you  are  a  literal  gem  and  i  will  fight  anyone  who  tries  you.

@sacrisaint -  ASTRID!!!  tbh,  i  have  no  idea  how  we  got  here.  one  day  you  were  sending  silly  comments  about  sonny  and  meg,  then  the  next  thing  i  knew,  you've  been  literally  going  to  bat  for  me  even  when  i  tell  you  not  to.  from  watching  that  silly  tire  movie  together  to  now,  i  hope  you  know  how  much  i  fucking  adore  you.  i  do  not  take  this  friendship  for  granted  one  bit.  the  shit  you  have  done  for  me????  like  i  just??  i  love  you  to  bits  and  pieces!!  idk  what  i  did  to  be  blessed  with  your  friendship  but  i  am  so  grateful. 

@qapsiel -  sarah  sarah  sarah………..  the  way  this  last  month  has  made  me  feel  like  shit,  but  the  moment  i  came  back???  you  were  the  first  to  get  me  cracking  up  so  hard  with  our  blessing  womb  bullshit.  the  joke  that  will  never  die  and  is  forever  ours  <3  your  writing  is  phenomenal  and  you  are  just  out  of  this  world.  you  getting  me  to  laugh  really  helped  immensely,  you  have  no  idea.  i  love  you  so  very  much  and  i  will  keep  torturing  you  with  tiktoks  <3  CAN  NEVER  GET  RID  OF  ME!

@benbraeden / @hervelle / @gankmonsters  /  your  bajillion  blogs  -  lilly  lilly  LILLY  <3  HOLY  FUCK.  i  remember  meeting  you  when  i  first  wrote  minah  when  i  first  joined  the  spn  community.  you  were  always  so  kind  to  me,  but  now???  i  feel  like  we've  continue  to  grow  closer  and  i  can  never  be  any  more  grateful!  no  matter  if  we  talk  a  lot  or  not  at  all,  you've  always  been  there  when  i've  been  feeling  like  shit  and  you  know  i  am  always  there  willing  to  fight  bitches  who  try  you.  i  adore  you  and  your  pure  heart.  you  have  nothing  but  love  for  people  and  it  is  so  fucking  admirable.  and  i  am  so  grateful  that  you  would  take  time  out  of  your  way  to  check  up  on  me.  i  don't  deserve  your  love  yet  here  we  are.  i  adore  you  immensely  and  that's  not  going  to  change.

@murderdeals  -  my  lovely  little  ava!  i  feel  like  we  have  gotten  closer  the  more  we've  been  writing  together  and  i  can  say  i  am  loving  every  minute  of  it  <3  i  also  appreciate  you  reaching  out  when  i  was  feeling  my  lowest.  you  have  been  nothing  but  sweet  to  me  and  all  i  want  is  to  smoosh  your  face  and  give  you  forehead  kisses  cause  i  just  fucking  love  you  mkay??  you  deserve  the  world  and  i  can't  wait  for  everything  we  create  together.  gonna  soar  from  here  bitch.

@salvatoraes  -  RISSA  <3  THE  OWNER  OF  MY  FUCKING  KIDNEY!!!!!!!!!!  i  don't  think  my  love  for  you  will  ever  stop,  bitch.  we  are  going  through  some  tough  shit  irl,  but  at  least  we  are  going  through  it  together  rebgskebg  i  can't  even  keep  count  on  how  long  i've  known  you,  but  i  know  that  i  am  so  fucking  grateful  for  you  every  single  day.  i  love  everything  we  have  created  together  and  i  love  the  chaos  that  we  bring  amongst  each  other.  and  i'm  sure  you  will  be  owning  another  part  of  my  body  because  i  will  give  you  everything  tbh.  you  are  THAT  important  to  me  okay?  one  of  the  best  people  in  the  entire  fucking  world  and  that's  not  going  to  change  ever  <3

@westwingsolo  -  a  my  love  <3  forever  grateful  that  i  have  met  you.  your  words  always  have  me  crying  and  always  bring  some  lightness  to  my  soul.  idk  how,  but  when  i  tend  to  feel  down,  you  tend  to  pop  out  of  nowhere  and  just  know  what  to  fucking  say.  i  love  you  to  the  moon  and  back  and  i  will  always  be  rooting  for  you  because  you  are  just  that  fucking  amazing.  constantly  giving  you  the  biggest  hug  ever!! 

[bridgertonbabe]

Signing off.

I never really thought I'd ever write a post like this and to be perfectly honest I feel a bit cringe for even making a thing out of this but I felt it necessary to address those of you who follow me and my writings.

In the last month I have been suffering severely from anxiety, waking up to what feels like a ball of dread clutching at my heart and being unable to shift it for the better part of the day. It's all come to a head as of late because I've reached a crossroads in my life where I've realised just how unhappy and unfulfilled I am. Truth to be told I really don't have any aspect in my life that I am happy with and for years I've dismissed myself and my own desires for the sake of others to the point where I have no self worth, no self confidence, and I just feel like a shell of a person. Realising that I can't go on like this, that I can't live the life I aspire to without sorting my mental health out, I've taken the first steps in getting counselling and in going to the doctors to be put on anti-depressants.

While I'm already starting to feel better, I've decided it's in my best interests to take some other steps going ahead; which is I'm logging off this account.

Don't get me wrong, this account has brought me fulfillment in the last two and a half years and I've had so much fun interacting with so many of you but as of late I've become very disengaged with Bridgerton. It's one of several of my hyperfixations which I have become anxious with in the last few weeks, in part because they are what I used to immerse myself in as a means to distract myself from a dissatisfying existence, but now I've decided to make a change in my life for the better, everything that I once used to bury my head in the sand has now essentially given me the ick. Bridgerton is just now one of several things that I feel the need to distance myself from in order to fully focus and concentrate on bettering my mental health as well as getting what I want out of life.

As much as I've taken pride in writing because of Bridgerton, my dream has always to one day publish a book of my own and I need to refocus my energies on writing my own original stories to have the chance of maybe being able to make that dream a reality. I would have so dearly loved to have been able to complete a whole host of WIPs (would have also loved to have been able to just focus on one story at a time but c'est la vie) and I can only apologise to anyone who's been hoping for an update from any of them.

You will still be able to read all of my works on AO3 (plus I've restored a couple I had previously hidden from view), and I won't be deleting this tumblr so all of my drabbles and various posts will still be here for you to browse and read at your leisure.

Though I'm stepping away from this account, I don't necessarily know if this will be forever. I might well end up in a better place mentally at some point and return with a healthier state of mind where I can enjoy Bridgerton again, and I would never rule out contributing writings again - however as it stands, I don't want to promise anything and taking care of my mental health is my main priority for now and the foreseeable future.

I also just wanted to take the opportunity to thank every single person who has ever liked, reblogged, and interacted with me since I joined. I had never previously shared any of my creative writing online and thought it would be nice if even a single person somewhere vaguely liked anything I had to share - but over the last two and a half years I've been given such a boost from the amount of people who have reached out and commented on any one of my silly writings. I don't think you'll ever understand just how much it has meant to me and the love and appreciation will stay with me forever.

That about does it, so thank you all for everything. I wish you all a lifetime of health and happiness.

Signing off,

Shinnie

xxx

[sincerelyamee]

[How I imagine Gojo teaching 5-year-old Megumi about his Ten Shadows technique aka recipe for disaster]

Most sorcerers with flashy innate techniques typically awake their powers around five or six years old - right around the same magnificent age they discover crayons are wonderfully effective for decorating more than just coloring books (RIP white walls everywhere).

Innate techniques in particular have a mind of their own, essentially “calling” to their user like an overly eager pet begging for treats and attention. One day, baby sorcerers just wake up, and bam - suddenly shadows are tugging at their skin or flames are sparking from their fingers, no warning or parental consent form required.

Little Megumi has been feeling the very first stirrings of his Ten Shadows for weeks now. Random surges of cursed energy that are definitely not just from sneaking extra pudding cups. Mysterious but insistent tugging sensations from the shadows, like ghostly hands trying to initiate a game of tag.

So, it’s time he gets some pointers on it, right? At least, that’s what Gojo decided.

On one peaceful morning, Gojo whisks out a whiteboard and markers from… somewhere. With such theatrical showmanship, one would think he was auditioning for Broadway itself. Yet the children serve as the ultimate tough crowd, responding only with raised eyebrows and curious glances.

Still, Gojo strikes a scholarly pose.

“Alright, my star pupil - Today’s lesson is on your badass upcoming technique!” Gojo announces, gesturing for Megumi to sit front and center.

As Megumi hesitantly takes his place, Nanako leans over to Mimiko. “How come he just happens to have a random whiteboard ready? Where does that even come from?” She whispers. Mimiko just shakes her head, too busy stuffing her mouth with chips.

“To start, your very first summons will be these adorable Divine Dogs!” Gojo proclaims enthusiastically. “Though at first, they’re more like Divine Pups…”

His marker zig-zags wildly as he tries sketching two majestic wolves. Emphasis on tries. The end results look something akin to a pair of mutant chickens wearing tutus. That elicits poorly contained giggles from the girls. Megumi simply stares, somehow experiencing all seven stages of grief simultaneously.

“Those are some weird chickens, nii-chan.” Tsumiki blurts out with all the sophistication of a future art critic.

“They look like they survived a nuclear blast,” Nanako adds.

Why does she even know what a nuclear blast is? Kids these days. Gojo makes a mental note to berate Geto later for letting the devil’s spawns watch too much TV. But since he’s Gojo, he forgets about it immediately. For now, he blinks down at his drawings, then back at the giggling, unimpressed kids.

“Clearly you heathens lack the artistic vision to appreciate my creative genius.” Gojo huffs before erasing his previous attempts in stunned outrage.

But Gojo Satoru isn’t one to give up easily, or ever.

Like a runaway freight train, Gojo charges full steam ahead. His Louvre-worthy artistic visions expand stranger the longer the ridiculous lesson continues. With each stroke of the marker, Gojo’s illustrations venture further into worlds unknown by man or beast. Eldritch creatures populate the poor whiteboard as head scratching and sideways glances spread among the children.

Megumi watches in dismay as the hours tick painfully on, the squeaking hamster powering his brain throwing itself from the rusty wheel. The last of his sanity packs its bags and flees into the abyss rather than witnessing more of Gojo’s artistic assaults against nature. At the rate this is going, he half expects his first summon to be a potato with Gojo’s face haphazardly drawn on it.

A glaring oversight dawns on the boy - for all Gojo’s useless prattling and monstrous drawings, explaining the actual summoning process appears a mere afterthought, if the man is even capable of actual thoughts at all. When asked, he simply waves off the question with a dodgy uh-huh. Just as effective as inquiring an orange tabby on quantum physics.

“It’s not that hard.” Gojo shrugs dismissively. “You’ll figure it out.”

Megumi rubs his temples, contemplating if it’s too late to grab Tsumiki and flee this madhouse, perhaps taking the twins as well. No one deserves such ruthless torture. Gojo may be well on his way to becoming another villain overlord with questionable artistic skills, but this? This right here marks Fushiguro Megumi’s very own villain origin story.

Staring blankly ahead in post-traumatic shock, Megumi knows one truth with the certainty of death itself - never, ever again will he make the fatal error of taking a lesson from Gojo. No, he must figure out this Ten Shadows technique solo going forward. Though now Megumi ponders whether deliberately summoning all those nightmarish abominations is something best avoided altogether.

read the whole thing here on Ao3: A Family of Villains - A wacky villain origin story/Kinda a slice-of-life fic exploring the logistics of 18-year-old sashisu being the greatest villains in the jujutsu world while on the run and raising 4 kids. Mostly fluff and humor of course.

[ttaffanartsfandom]

Repost:

(December 23rd, 2023)

DA SUPERRAKOONZ !1!!1!11 HECK YEA 🦝

Introduce (myself added up bc i didn't wanna yall introduce my own oc yet if youd like to assure you it's only just a being authorized with dealing in side character all of a sudden) all of the little creatures I've made fanmade characters that I create in mini versions unfortunately the others modern versions used to be delayed but don't worry I'd just add a bunch of details, biography, paragraph script into my history or maybe some headcanons crucially however this is spoiler admire...so I hope you love my fictions or whatever YOU interesting it besides I had huge ideas about them for a theme inspiration in my head✨️(i hope i didn't forget anything)

Ehh... Let's start !!! Who knowsss

TRAVIA CANON EVENTS:

Name: Talking Ron

Main Character: Protagonist (Hero)

Capabilities Revealed:

Curing (healing) mightily Self-Healer (Regenerative Healer)

Multipontational (massive creative and interests to reserve held by educational activities when you use your psychological control power and strength and your co-ordination skills altogether to keep indeed societies from the future afterward to make a bunch of things that crucially get stronger input towards hearing yourself from worldwide passions)

Force-Field - Blocking inside his protection against his lives will fight the right choice (technological attacks can cause his past protection resolution to revolve unseriously injured in front of his control system behind his enemies as long as he doesn't suppose losing his energy without destroy Ron's life specific motion is mentally breaking down. Thus, for Uses, his controllable mindset overpowering to be managed to better flexibility with surroundings that should stay away from them with no distraction from enemies as you may have been danger) as known as "Flyrokinesis" list on kinetic.

Hacking Mastery - With his watch (automatically rare ! It is what it called "Technopathy", but different physic scientific extract from contractors' beginners are very given to many details from watching to attend to their interaction, perceive discovery(e.g., listens), watches, telepathic anybody. For some reason, it is used to be made up of circumstances like giving examples issues any speculation sometimes when it goes somewhere wherever you go till track down there will glow to leads you and gives another explanation. especially thus selection for courses on any side of equity, presumably that has multiple items inside his watch nor recent collections of submissions from amount of research that would helps your visitors to give them your acceptance once and for all !)

Psionics (legendary character does give him more powerful to those nonviolent to guarantee the world is the bestest thing you've knowledge of empower for. Whenever he gets a bunch of superpowers, such as his gem element on his tourmaline chest>under his crystal shiny made on cosmic force supernaturally strongest gemstone that requires you can glow up to became adolescent resulting in the forward when starts to feel like it restore himself into what is transformation in his rejuvenate happens his long-term life does never ever his disappears deathly wishs his luck< In the beginning of Psionics is that most likely the extreme is the highest abilities he has ever does do he got several manipulations..exactly what's about gotten too much his cleverness.

Psychokinesis (termination of his experiment to prove his true desire for complete existence can control his mind by everyone worried that witnesses attempt from past their wayside another he is willing or thinking to provide certified and focused on his influence of starting gets more inconvenient serenely damages nothing can happen to his powers are in situating. Active disapproval has nothing to do in his doubt manner. Don't get angry, frustrated, or picky to be careful yourself by making worse.)

Hydrokinesis (commonly used to known his hands to remake his imagination to separate him to compete against the water to gives his assurance of tries of strength to make a through sub-power hydration value to create some perspective to socialize your skills. The amount of his vex crisis would've might be much outrageous it came out of explodes and splashes everywhere due on demand).

Pet peeves:

Being late (awake, too late to absurd alarm but cannot hold himself into back comfortably straightforwardly possible to remember to take care himself even remotely to ensure remaining days which is also hating how to express to delayed his time however his watch needs to watch out for intend someway impropriety sincerely falling his behavior cannot be shown up to becoming more annoyed after this happens all day).

Snores (sometimes should shut their mouths, it probably gets worse to hear someone's snores during sleeping temporarily dislike the disrespect of his oversight with a bit extremely unsuccessful).

Losing things (again, maybe his memory might be lost, but reminder he powers can almost chase his passes to his stance then again the beginning of his story can be also annoying to lose every stuff what's leaving..)

Hiding from someone (it depends not to mention his manners were too accessible to reach his target towards their hidden and when it tries to annoy you for not telling what's behind here ? Instead of privacy, it'd like to make sure to save secrets and share each other, but unfortunately, it's getting started frustrating for doesn't understand his trustworthiness. Leads him don't make sense don't make him sensitive he's able to finish his reliability that should get deserved better what they staff will do spread. A rare to prevent the "obscure, not uncertainty"? The minimum offer is not just for constant attention because of the complaints that who bothers them who never believes Ron's thinks that is the case could never underestimate, such like mysterious threat. His responsible are always totally trusted with effective feelings because otherwise to shouldn't been said about bad about left behind his unserious, somehow he super annoyed the fact ignores you doesn't affect your mood without telling the truth nor sticking side).

TRIVIA:

Name: Roy Rakoon

Main Character: Antagonist Anti-hero (actively)

Capabilities Revealed:

Mastermind - Supervillain can do things for evil stuff. (very clever to creating stuff, his mind to bragging the whole thing do super weaponry serialization can be dangerous to continually to outstanding intellect such a brilliant idea thinker with original ideas he recently had several crimes to make increases everyone's lives will be devastating. After his steps forward to the biggest clever, genius thoughts that really did that superior were clearly taken over town to attempt fully professional to be theft, it is possible to fought them back his sidekicks' total brutality especially his powers are too unsafe to pop up in front of others wanna be his idolize is way too powerful to those small special about him to not seem his suspicious nor got caught seems strangely to figure out to stole their life properly to such hidden burglary. Thus, he did for goodly stealing jewelries, store, money, and any of those against crimes to abandon his rights it is for antagonizing himself into supervision and ruining innocent people to all gestures could hesitate for them to not care about their feelings because his selfish reasons were supposed be act not selfishness someway the can happen whenever his owner backstabbing it moreover than that doesn't do best his choice to right things to everyone career a huge innocence not Roy's feelings constantly savages moments all of a sudden.)

Hand-to-Hand Combat: (Karate nor martial art skills indescribable the session kick-off their interaction to be more powerful than weaknesses focuses. The difference between hand to hand combat definition is that weapons sometimes include terrific tools whenever how seems to ranges from beside the phrase do not take actions theoretically terminal skills to comprehend the consequences of his control made up tricky. Technically, it's just some short-term things that would work for him. Psa: His pet naming "Helping Hand" (accomplice helper) is a robotic thing to control with one hand and has only button on it could handle the assistance of sideways to proportion each other to destroy the entire universe hasn't been overcome.)

Survival Skills: (create a built something you imagine can have that much technique to use helping others to survive themselves as for himself rest of environmental issues but helping all thing to do common sense is preventing to try to his skills to operate in any kind of container who wanna do job provides master includes fire, wood, water threshold, camping foodstuffs when it does makes him fastidious sculpture behind people wording his history tries helps by himself none of them often have somewhat to receive his reassure until by then essentially safety due built-up while thousands hours to complete this effort any detail that surely isn't that necessary when he used to learn type of basic whatever chooses.)

Hacking Skills: (create grew fast the technology success abilities takes his business and controls the devices of hardworking to make a earned maximum to built robot, machine, unlike scientific progressive access every world has been hacked out by danger however when he carefully plans crazy things like combinatorial his brutal intelligence and must've getting different from somebody's error connections that might be worth it somehow he learns to do computing complete daily through trial-and-error for became a massive negative demonstration although there's more informing the public story about how he uses self-destructive (to availability for his appear the screen from nowhere the nearest time is all over townspeople started outrageous) appearances came up on his mind by not "seldom" his destruction to manage the world will be devastated to sooner rather perishable throughout at the end of the day filled out of evidences).

Architecture - Structures Skills: (he built anything from structural engineering workout, including the houses like can superspeed understands the construction how initiative usually useful for other company's would hire his moderate approach to his powers and thinks of reasoning against blueprint to drawing and creating something "perpendicular" likely perspective gorgeous model creation that creates himself a million seconds overdue after finishes built-in too quickly nothing can change his potential ways even his pontificate are protests very right nothingness frame in front of other workforce..)

Pet peeves:

Whining or Whiners: (to be fair, he dislikes annoying brats to make him look unusual sensitive his proven that he never should ever complain about ridiculous excessive behavior and stuff cry louder at him and eliminates (fails his proper gesticulation words) to their annoyance.)

Disconnect issues: (really hate the fact that the internet connection went worse and might be extraversion (talkative) to his computation tries really hard to connect the right way to figure it out how rid of the tittle scrap thingy when's thingamajig precisely demolished the error problem with getting point in disappointment and kinda annoying how repetitive itself which is doesn't make sense whose fail his handling is game over. Suddenly..)

Slow Walkers: (beholding himself doesn't giving chance why's waiting too long in the traffic suchlike meant to be more exaggerated can't hold himself to random people is super annoying when it starting to feel like it rages the bombarding of huge boring to move on side way to consideration fact to deal with him to ran faster than slow walkers). Quote roy: "MOVE OUT OF WAY YOU DORKS I TRIED TO BACKSTREET TO NOT BE LATE LATER ON I FASTEST AS I CAN"

Getting exposing secrets: (his hidden will never escape his from caught by others to avoid the temptation called out at person to known what's behind the schemes before someone else could see his suspension after all that begins to disassociate yourself one of blames causing a troublesome exact situation to moment of Roy's exposed to the people asked him so many times, while he's starting to annoying at them because everyone though he is criminal or whatever his mansion what's inside to not be considerate as during the investigation).

TRIVIA CANON EVENTS:

Name: Scientist Ron

Main Character: Contagonist

Capabilities Revealed:

Telekinesis: (A paranormal is the mind control itself whatever happens, his ultimate brain, properly repeatability gets more powerful and single physical system dragging on stronger is allows to hands-on manages to struggling appeal the hearing yourself again thus serving is better to do his magic to multiply on supplies to make a huge forceful commitment towards his manipulation skills can lead optimize with his little "antennae" on his upper ears (protuberance maybe ?) to connect like buzzing sounds tough is roughly Instruments noises, and participants can perceive wiring itself to the muscle meter to suggest what's blowing up. Special Features: To the point of wire electricity thingy, this might living aera nearby voiding empty trespassing center is declared in what called "consent" to giving a partner permission. Unfortunately, this can't hold strict simulation aside them who are judging by step a side clearly doesn't like to hear what they said while the end of the discussion this would be his first danger uses aggression at them least of once than specific to take his monstrosity reminded looks like kind of alien moving into evacuate estate direction property. Likewise, the anticipation of his antennae can actually wiretap his wrap on people's minds (like radiation movements, chemics effectiveness) no matter what cause can be something evacuation.)

Telepathy: (reading their minds who accessed their communications since readers knows what point could ever try to understand and unbelievably impossible to assist hearing thoughts, besides extrasensory very critical plans due prerogative, whatsoever is inspection as extrasensory perception sensitivity measures less pressure to reach his thoughts upon about reaction was distributed primarily covered up).

Multilingual - (Omnilingual with his goggles communicated): (Tons of languages for speakable mechanic speaking out outnumbered monolingual ability is the most important thing that communicated even more activity surrounding your different language techniques that can proceed either everyone has cultural natives for could be globalizing each other somehow the human body seems to reasonable for sure if it hanging disruptive his attention personality apart from personnel something tasks and offering them to share their understandings). As for Omnilingualism: (exact what came from multilingual, but this is way different superpower. However, it can treat itself whatever suppose that can refer to speaking out of understanding to duplication opportunities for the opposite side that begin over relatively quickly about true alternative languages to ultimate power and figuring themselves as known unspoken learnt its possible to get plenty of hobby as for his impression gotten into existence. When he associates the part of forgetting his goggles, it is probably rare somewhat to control factor of the numbers, which is that it truly doesn't influence to transform something erroneously that indicates to prevent how to occur if he show the system disgruntled to the programming codes, exports are supposed to be looked greenish technically types of "error connection mechanism" would look like mathematician in a equation some sort of calculator prototype can actually interact in the features sounds generally do things about like most of uncalled artificial intelligence that proves to produce a human languages especially foreign languages includes speech to keep usual vision at them not to easy to his self capitalized. As for his superpowers in any way to manipulate kinds symbols as he thinks of to processing the whole routine, it made sure if it wasn't going after his separation starts while the other his languages could gets supernatural powerless outtakes (depends) as much he explains how the communication works after all gets never known he shows or whatever that high variations are no big deal which is happens he angered it for the "both" example his establishment once-over or not is coming from his antennae CONTROLS his goggles besides his side face right away, again in the further down is usually aware that it charges itself to the main issue instantly causes overpower madness self-control and then look way difficult person's emotions that is a way wrong to shouldn't and expect yourself from getting insecure for breaking to your promise it is because his owner scientific to approach himself and tries to giving decisions then suddenly bringing about his being overprotective is despicable without any anger or bothered by the problem furthermore mannerisms isn't faulty did determine loss combine the logic may doesn't work the way he act up..).(longest story)

Engineering Skills: (Stuff workability is intended only for position to be better being a worker and at the time of resume anything essential that can be leadership or creativity study for geologically math as for branches algebra, geometry, trigonometry calculus, number theory, combinatorics, probability, arithmetic, topology as for stratification details from subjects skills are chemistry (wording biochemistry) biology (wording botany & microbiology), meteorology, oceanography, zoology, physics, geophysics, history, astronomy, volcanology, computer>(I.T stands for Information Technology), solar system, geography, statistics, analysis, systems theory, and logic, & types of particular discipline rules really happens if he is "co-ordination". Also in engineers nonexistent and several major professionals things can does actively to never stops his compared none to his abilities can take you down from his geniuses fundamental knowledge of the biggest energy ever shown your shocked instead of studying in educational systems for his happiness wanted needs peacefully around being teenage and probably nerdy of course because he used to remember how his memories would've lost his enthusiasm eventually the event of his journal used to be number one for one of his physical activity matches will gets scored by out in front infinitely).

Absolute Intelligence: (IQ reasonably sure is about infinite power to manage his own as problem-solving as compassion in limited acknowledges remain in competent ability to take out of service for the others modern ones and create his psychological terrifyingly be fantasize and cans manipulated on controlling the actions no matter how this entire thing work for him must got to be most fascinating extremely and dangerously hazardous moment of proliferate to able multiply to sooner comes situated has become an proficiency for such massive growth peerless the admired of skills is because of the demonstration superstitious can be worth leading toward your damages can also be harmful for the health purposes whenever he never stops his weakness durably to be stable kinds phrase). Unlikely fluid intelligence or emotional intelligence conflict opposites unexpectedly.

Sonic-Scream: (Super legendary for his constant supreme ability purely for his superpower in the most vicious sense of an extremely powerful scream/shriek of high amplitude for a variety of purposes from his vocal cord and mouth, typically for offensive purposes, like causing destruction procedurally attacks, louds towards crowds unnecessarily didn't get rid of his bad attitude as a affected the enemies from his feelings judgment but not required unless they suffer his wave destruction is getting above them no harsh to be sure to careful what is wrong to negotiate. The contagonist can also direct their screams over large distances and even send them at specific targets because it seems really doubt that people's wordings are craving as his regular personal personnel devolved for starting shouting at them in aggressively nerve is gonna solve his handle).

Pet peeves:

Science jokes (technically): (not technically or technical purposefully. Specifically, it is rare ! Scientists didn't care so much about the comedy shows or jokes, obviously, that it stared to be odd oftentimes. Perhaps meanwhile, he was annoyed by someone who exclusively cared about science comedy when he heard of hatred so can disrespect along in the laboratory for multiple attempts from hearing from his field subjects because of the unserious sentence of his startled face off at jerks). According to the journalist appointment recorded by resources of scientific matters, it is a resume to Alternatively write about the scientist profession not to compromise by each side, making jumping conclusions

Interrupting: (in the laboratory, of course, without any helping anyone to try to comfort him and ambitiously can not resist his problems and bother to truly be focused on his eyes to filled out the chemicals holds his graduated cylinder from the many supplies that uses his plentiful for creation but disliked scared of him to screwed up at this point. Otherwise anyone towards his place to be live is not to make messes up in front of your groups or try help your groups with who's nerdy person and elaborate to arrange because he won't do this either few interruptions this time).

Poking: (out of nonsense matter with one's finger to play with the game in poked your nose and the objected which is currently pushing the way and sticking into eyes, is pure disliked it will be bothering any other annoying stuff how tries to poke around him in his entrance part of the most unknown thing you've spotted in actual reason the kids wouldn't have drained absolute might irritating from reasoning to kids touching supplies unlike poking made him interrupted become an irrelevant when's said with that be said he resigned from typical business to reach the hope gets attention as a downright instead of hoax, a goodly thing is he phenomenally hates pokes during focusing on innovation plans).

Clicking the pen: (stopping his loads somehow shows up to spending time, one's person over next to him to barely see being bored till starting clicking the ridiculous sounds with a big earshot of annoying over his intense reaction to it kept repeating real awkwardly out of his mind couldn't resist this as nervousness to may know what's from misophonia disorder recovery is up a really recognize that tapping dripping has rid of the cruel thing the way the pen nerve be allowed to follow his distraction without got disturbed onto makes himself a erupted inside in angered such as annoying as specified by changing his reactivate on spoke of repetition if it goes to represent a noises sounds probably did his unsettling may not have a bad reputation).

Not paying for things: (never paying attention or listening to inside his instructions unless when they understand it may decide to drift off to the point of view were prevent front of your lines while taking so much hours to aware of annoyance begin that awful same way during the time of his thousands rule of graphic suffering to stopping them to waste their time to living in his potential wordy using rather not just annoying in front of them just because he emerged from his legally group doesn't giving right to and proves everything to enter view on infographic not enough of his boarding pass to time constraints other group's imposition towards his journal while he trying to speak to whole situation instead of anything predictable reasons).

Slow internet: (connecting something wrong to can't make things work that happens to him in general until tried reconnect with other device to hacks his own magic spells and seems like it gets really annoying if goes slow retry another loading screen every time that he sees any kind of emergency wouldn't stopped because the poor hands wasn't surving those whole internet occurrence problem it gives so much confusion slows down around the time to figure his out of the technology could cause this trouble super annoying when making his nerves).

Annoying neighbors: (welcoming or greeting neighbors is alright when you eventually get submitted by random people with no forcing creases to actual reason for the right manner to mark the above them. Unfortunately, when he sees others, strict neighbors can judge the behold gathered to his believers, and they start to guarantee choices to having breakdown was no shortage cannot be associated can also find the annoying any given attention something negative towards his kindness smuggle form interact his place need to be getting out and never see them again with huge pessimistic in disrespecting unwanted stuff to oftentimes bringing to other negativity outright).

Physical touch: (simply rare ! Touching any kind of appropriate way without ramble or whatever thinks that he felt, which is can ever happen some groups touches you it feels inside on risk tickles and turned out he sneeze at them in his irresponsible mistaken could be embarrassing did not wanted to gets ticklish because disliking shoulder touched isn't good for it instead of just called his name better this way rather than annoying touches makes him worse that made it out sicknesses and be careful. Physical touch is not his favorite word for unrelated matters. he gets his disposable away).

Mental Disabilities - Disorders:

Hypersensitivity: (according to his skin, fur syndrome can also have sensitivity medical condition, which is the cause of allergic reactions to affect his body fluid intake of antigen regarding type in known as immediate hypersensitivity as for occur there in exposure in allergy treatment for out of his pimple within hours of another acne is belive and hidden somewhere whenever this does makes him look normal looks natural mention immunity to work together complete both to protect his body unassembled is done possible to see results from his normalized characteristic in short retirement life to giving intoxicated feels wasn't normal for some reason and watch out and do not worry about it, it is safe which is happens his through inside above his system works). In the meantime, as for aggregates called "immune complexes," it formed a rougher pathway.

Schizophrenia: (had a bad mood is considered to have a serious mental disorder in recovering from his distress is technically a chronic reality abnormal in case of his constant a bit extreme disabling inside apart from functioning whenever gets worse and might even be starting having hallucinations once his anxiety, distress portion in some combination sets the impaired daily properties in coursing for behavior in his hold treatment out of unattended can sorting through trusted to due results from begins has multiple overview includes, vomit, delusions, traumatic, effective such a particular for lack of motivation and disliked miserable sounds gotten too deafness instead of privacy in form too far to allows him look absolute secure incompletely dishonesty but the thing is for his schizophrenic syndrome won't even unstoppable inaccessible lifelong for pity totals triggers). According to the main calling of paranoia, (losing his thoughts and worries so much what happens if he feels threatened) which is complete become an paranoid for the effects of being threatened to begin to make him look bad, torture himself, and cooperate with evidence are truly outset for some way judgment one of his group's towards criticism about the composing in generally a representative on his responses to not giving nothing respectability for surely outlook on not settling on in to persecution thoughts, although there's no doubt about his distrust in others ironic disadvantaged actions...

Hypersomnia: (cause of excessive sleepiness and the many reasons when he sees himself into difficulty as a problematic as known, not supporting his good sleep when it goes on overtime to take too much far time and never stops workable ability dominant of vary slightly underlying in his illness and told it was unhealthy for his overnight life instead of making things overall does makes shifting work a lot as for sleepiness conditions for ill ironically and repeatable depression, likely stuff includes insomniac of the rest of doings days often and giving easy to stopped his life-long without fixing hypersomnia for the first might soundly needed for help to get back to sleep until the staff works messy with too little harsh and somehow against his feels super motivated of nothing prepared for battle in every hours until ends the daylight for reasons it's a huge understanding his technique must to do whatever he wants but it doesn't fact the change nothing to command his mind to lifestyle to achieve the all night or all day after break or nothingness because of how long does this take to before the overslept beginning ? Therefore, in the uncalled sleep, as far as away his insomnia is not because of the renamed hypersomnia of the definition so it could resist his shouldering statement, an actual clear up that the most important thing is about him to accepted it than he did on purpose either incident way out of businessman. No wonder why he has under-eye bags happening with his sleep deprivation, having not enough sleep quality).

Anorexia also known as Eating Disorder: Historically under the word is also added atypical anorexia nervosa symptoms examples of his dieting physical obsessing with getting skinny (is an average warped body that feeling himself into fluent about weight, is turning something very low gain from an image yourself to look normal may problems with metabolism to eating healthy foods without troubling to his freedom abdominal bad habits are simply made him forced to be intense fear of faith in gaining weight and specific restrictions of calories and seems to be force to gave him poorly luck to the extreme label spreads of the bodyweight intake someway to approach his body never used to lose every limit to beat the better finding food to insure the health on his diagnosis expects pushing exercising causes of underweight maximum loss below deadly less healthy between heavy metabolic transform energetic whose consciousness in malnourished any kinds of nutrition but his body is common diet for a day of no food in such a afraid of thing to do "decision-making").

Psychogenic sneezing: (caught up by hormones fluid into his virus causes damage from his cells to skeptic the sneeze under his booger to protein amino acids can be helpful for stopped his tissue cramped such a uncomfortable in necessary time of permanent stroke could cause a pain to survive during affects seizure to freeze itself nor does the makes cold even harder. The sneezing is supposed to be rare to use psychogenic to stress react in his psychological condition addictive behaviors that are wide-ranging and side effects of the damaging disease can also be unpleasant if the skin was not before referring strongly fear toward parts sensation is not too normal because when he becomes something way worse the sneeze situation has literal disastrous the only thing just don't started feel nothing unless he has a fever to sniffs really dust type of infection).

TRIVIA CANON EVENTS:

Name: Gang Ron

Main Character: Villainous Protagonist (Anti-villain)

Capabilities Revealed:

Terrakinesis, also known as Geokinesis: (a talking about his villain role, is the most strongest ability he ever had that can control a pair of superpowers to spare his mind to dominate the earth but in the certain way to shown version of his powerful ragging from moving solid rock and other rock to the path sidewalks (street) the road at will escalate the to minded himself could sacrifice to stay on his pro overmuch and it based on his variation materialism and elemantalism due to view elements value to section as a simpler nature at making so much efforts to manage his anger or mind controlling itself to raging the apposed of the generates that step to reward can consume more energy ever known as superior power to collapse whole crowd. For the rare answer that he is also creating on his "watch" that is really based on gangs claims violation standards control over reality members to entire creation a reshape geologic materials to process as such as dirt underneath the ground and then that much deeper knowing where to his interest in closest their communications experiences. For that being said, the massive majority of his dangerous corporations were surprised to cut off from instinct strangers. After that, he powering up got destroyed the big attachment forwarding route distance from his general rest, which is disliked to be known as intimidation to people freaked out at him because it gets close to him moving strangers to having anger reactions to flow and throw at them with his mastery manipulation inconsiderable self-conscious down from his edginess. As a matter of fact, the research above his total brutality loses his control over suffering from negative effects of the most incurred everybody's junk towards his afterthought witness abilities taken too seriously, it can also smashing to elements that makes him not feeling pain with his arm muscles too protective to contain justified legitimate use for located in a sudden progressive to made up his elbows joint although it remains his immobilized for a few longer to get away).

Graffiti Skills (aerosol art): (A well-known wildstyle additional making artistic designer from the owner paintings and creativity written is usually to having the best ability skills to grant his allowance for spray all over the walls without permission although common turning into image of impression stylish perfection symbol is it known by criminality standards brought out to single other surface is considerably illegal to never gets seen who doesn't want to use one of his gangsters with non gang-related visitors of wrongdoings is unacceptably stuff is getting something like to have a fun time with sprayed entire world instead of witnesses attempt from comes by toleration and having habitat the portable sided of wall because everyone's knows are knowledgeable to hearing themselves to wanted them live in peace however the policeman arrived from conference in front of his individual to screwed up at this stage for being unauthorized malicious destruction in public property in the meanwhile the definition of "irresponsible personal in human being" is he doesn't care about their complaining manners was because nothing is about defacement he is being ignorant at the beginning then flashes toward your fought and to tries fight his back and forth into bash into "domestic vi0lence" (sorry if this was unnecessary traumatic warning additionally..because of his suffer "vague" is too pure liability are for overwhelmingly dysregulation emotions) at them acts up to pretend against tidings with his unserious answers is giving up on only time does not work anything essential information after his compassion defenceman is an survivor of another reason that can not be arrested involving the clue of vandalism).

Invisibility with his watch (automatically rare too ! Obviously it is probably creating to grant something item to set up for consent at his separation starts while the operator is making significant changes to make up to possible transforms body in to be shield from disappearance by the time can also pranked otherwise recent to vibe him from others to manage their business instead of business is all need to do to breakdown was durably crashed down from outside used to be security within 24 hours of seen a not visible to clearly nothing to seem strangely consider or overreacting yourself to remember how movements works if there's a temporary one a period time of loses his time by the again during his fun or staff wanted to like to stealing everything without everyone's worry too much as far as it is just a coincidence and there's more thing his watch is actually protection from self-defense so better watch out because hes too mischievously plans are way difficult to make him victory battle matter of time is very tiring to attend to his won appear in facility, either second spot of persons passive or take advantage of choices....even if it too far maybe try to do it next time...).

Roasting Skills: (discovery in the discrepancy in savage roastes is also an insult and descriptive reform for the insecurities to best destroy one of his opponents, and an argument is going soluble behind frustration evidently the position down from negativity is belongs his manners was hesitant try to replicate each of tastes went provoking legit liked made of someone's privacy and other behavior shows that tease them in silence that never truly describe his attention because when he roasts some diffusion includes humorous joke, sarcasm, disrespect, criticism besides his gang groups is capable to be better every savage words to loved to see their reactions without his beyond side consequence to defeating them instead of is best giving them shot and not meant for offense ones doesn't mention any terminating of bringing about attack them during an argument to distinguish the opposition event straight up point).

Porcupine Powers: (speaking of spikes for under his half masquerade mask was based on domino mask in the right side half face mask inside eye view is specially used to throws everywhere or it can breaks stuff to prevent how spiky can causes damage to prove to shown that it sharpen whenever their growing back itself whatever starts inside the mask it occasionally even gets strike frequency into restarting times bunch of his branches includes bracelet, necklace, gloves has spikes in there for sufficient amount of attention to claim his rule of such as breaking the law as an important resolution action would probably rest of his absence to rid of his abysmal a bit extreme presentation right outlook. As for his durability, it took advanced in danger composed to a self-made of armor surviving against the stage from where he begins his enemies, who start missions in type of way at a attack high speed, while his self defense will comes with the last straw toward his commentary which is unsophisticated somehow under his spike mask outcalled purposes to use once realizing that could control and pushed the button throughput is very professional to create some turns on design weapons built up by event with his what's planning on going to be is giving true worthy requirements to feel like moving into his organism (output from self controlling to spot there) and everything).

Trash-Talker (interactions with somebody else could aspersion to be mattered as well as the skill speakable describing the debate an insult spoken to bouts of biting is also incompetent, not an exclusive way to make so much excuses indeed to perhaps that made them less confident without his words given the struggle as much possible unlike forced to uses a acts of nothing how do gets done whenever uses for his stays humorous spirit always totally brutal is actual wildest ones ever wording in speech talks about in front of them instead of bring this up to body language sincerely bad calling names or unnecessary negative words intent face-off showdown skirmish on sending icky stuff have no idea his thinks even coming from is absolutely unfairness. Same with the previous one, "roasting skills" are pretty potential wordy using similarly to understanding more the information and differences between trash talks in heavy way..).

Hysterical Strength is also known as Supernatural Strength to connect with: (The most common anecdotal examples based on hearsay are of parents lifting vehicles to rescue their children, and when people are in life-and-death situations. Automatically, it used to force other items to take away from danger instead and least of stronger thing to picking every single heaviest to show more activation. Another usages: He possesses a supernatural strength. This incredible strength allows them to effortlessly lift massive vehicles, large airplanes, boulders, and even locomotives. Offensively, depending on if there's anything metalized like a massive major could happen to allow his power to exert strength to keep superhighway and his protective effect of victory successfully in among these phenomenon get away deported in situating and any kind of his ability is must've known publicly for all the safety gestures by any time not because he is the hero of saving/rescuing everyone to his savior is the reasonable for his emotions probably subsequent unable curiosity toward a chances of winning the his givens by scenery valedictory. Frequently it can be more romantic way some other's reaction becomes mind-boggling to sees his strength can also made him look attractive figure in front of them and solve their feelings to surround his circumstance sort of personalities behind their captures in this possession thoughts nothing to be concern for it getting holds his life and his disinterested based on it isnt helpful by them because he's too rushed for watches more often and wanted them more behave to him but giving short gently manner..).

Pet peeves:

Interrupting: (On abandoned place at his empty spot where to sitting on the loneliness street as announce himself is also main abandonment in a permanent living direction road nearly downtown. As for his interruption, it is important to let you get away from them to prepare for the best to ignore it, but the main issue is that getting bothered, he strongly dislike who blatantly make a huge conversation about themselves to absolute despise in actual thrown in nonessential annoyance in nonsense matter. It's very pessimistic for his response to provoking intensely doubts about everyone's controlling him look unusual abnormal personal it can treat you knowing how he seems raging at them and pisses his off and needs to picked his piece of joy no matter what he truly cares for everything without socializing in local privilege but does make him happiness no more annoying people so just be careful what sentences do only asked his "permission" rule list but that's his own choice though not them..).

Touching: (Really hate the fact he is suitable for mentioning every part of his physical appearances and such as annoying people who touch plenty of stuff and any other who collect his attention because he emerged them in logic might be made him uncomfortable in different ways either none giving him constant permission to feel his confidence could profound feelings before the touching thingy when's feels twisted and unsatisfied does not work for the historical aspects to try to point at their destination for regrets about it which is complete misunderstood by his values is controversial but it's all about annoying people who rashes to his trust to force him looked off from sticking around into pushing out of privately).

Loud Chewing: (Disrespecting in boundaries with the worst to seen oppressed over relatively established less felt lack of triggers however if chewing noises really get under your skin, you may be suffering from more than just a passing annoyance. You may be allergic to certain sounds it is what it is called "Misophonia" is also considered to suffer given the circumstances to can't handle how wild sounds gotten to be worse noises those who he has might a sound driving you crazy from his reactions can range from anger besides them and dislike bothers everything to make sure they didn't care if they chewing gum for giving him attention because it's such a waisted to watch them back is all things to do control over them in violently whatsoever).

Alarm Clock: (like I said, he is super obnoxious on hearing horrible sounds when he got into his mind blowing up and excessive behavior then he definitely might destroy snooze for good with no distracted of sleepy time directed toward him because he literally annoyed at alarming sounds even though this eventually gets worse to tries he best to sleep without awake or whatever doesn't feel too well to waking really that early someday. Wouldn't be a coincidence for him, or it is just for connecting with emotions to be unnoticeable craziness over his recently woke).

Staring: (Some people just zone out, and you end up in their line of sight. Some people, though, have no tact. Staring feels especially frustrating when you’re already uncomfortable..it is really disliked for begging someone's stares for close up each other is the stupidest known for sure how pretended is trying to figure out to looked away from them. It's no problem at the moment, but embarrassing yourself isn't that big of a deal. He dealt an ignorant face-to-face confrontation judge, by the way..) However, he thought that it made him angered at them and reaction it's with his actual own quote mentions: "What are you looking at ?" or another regular slang: "Tch, what are you looking at me like that.. dork ? Can't you see I'm seeing myself to look desperate before you looked at me like a maniac ? Aren't I saying things to you ? Oh.. well, kiddo, being alone forever isn't my business... except one of my gang teammates would like to join just for freedom.... Sooo.. ehh, buzz off !!"

Talking during the movie: (If someone is next to you talking throughout the entire film, how are you going to hear what the actors are saying ? The same goes for using your phone in a dark theater. It's kinda distracting to everyone else that you have said it is wrong to look up or pull out your phone during movie theater, which disallowed them to stop texting so then again become an outrageous to till now to smash their phone without hesitation because he's too evil-doer for ready destroys any more satisfied himself against crime is no to be afraid of his bravery to take advantage of people's devices mostly admires his regrets and gets annoying sounds since it used to be displayed after the gossiping over him is giving up moreover moving another number doorstep but not anymore).

Talking over people: (Righteousness surely you feel a little bit burnt out being the only person who is carrying the conversation when socializing. It something come to clearly gets annoying that dislikes' way to seem get angry is overcome with them within hours to believe failing patience rather than interrupted and instant back away to leaving alone that cannot stand them to stay on his along space as matter of fact the problem during featuring reaction unexpectedly thing's the only way to stop them in to become silence sometimes he associates nobody should benefit from his generalize about the smelly humans (While talking over them decided to choose from sombody else instead of him is also can be waiting for his patience but not anymore).) His mental disorder is adhd can be sigh on side character does makes him bad situations especially their says on assumptions of what to wanted he needs despite them separate from notwithstanding spitefully...Any other common neurodevelopmental disorders discovered that his neurological trouble can be included Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED), Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), Asperger's syndrome formerly disorder (AS), Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) related to added up. Or May not...soon !

Music Genre & Instruments Interests:

Rock-and-roll: (Musically characterized by a heavy beat and uncomplicated melodies. It first emerged as a fusion of rhythm and blues with country music knows how to play really good instruments and beat the used to be his persona. it also had a polarizing influence on lifestyles, fashion, attitudes, and language. It is often portrayed in movies, fan magazines, and on television. He was really obsessed with it to practice even more activities. In band rock music has put in toward his own interest to point of view is surprises his way enjoyment).

Electronic music: (any music involving electronic processing, such as recording and editing on tape, and whose reproduction involves the use of loudspeakers. It is sure to be different from type of his practical techniques as long as he admits himself to use those instruments work to help it out from his gang-related memberships, which joins up to get into the studio performance).

Heavy metal: (around mid-90s his very young age to be called teenage: A Summary of how did he learns from start to become a professional musician due According to his middle childhood, he wanted to be singer, artist band to carry his own destiny to inspire any kind of famous artists to feel he'll get motivated to be just like them and proceed toward happiness likewise wanna teach himself to use lessons in random notes to make a perfect splendidly blend up recovering his guitar skills of the period time to work a longer hours to practice way such as his flexibility in event exclusive way sort of sources giving him easier until he grew up in glowing up turned out to be well-made just for adjustable a made him look punk figure maybe could be attractive guy rather than be bad guy it might also be mixed-up matter of time for further goes. It stays own lives).

Funk music: (It deemphasizes melody and chord progressions and proves focuses on a strong rhythmic groove of a bassline played by an electric bassist and a drum part played by a percussionist, often at slower tempos than other popular music. Funk typically consists of a complex percussive groove with rhythm instruments playing interlocking grooves that also create a "hypnotic" and "danceable" whatever he feels. Well, It uses the same richly colored extended chords frequently found in bebop jazz, such as minor chords with added sevenths and elevenths, and dominant seventh chords with altered ninths and thirteenths. In the meantime, other percussionists can play funky music, which is badass to give, allowing away while playing the rest of his doings himself to proving all the matters).

Electric Guitar - Bass Guitar 🎸: (It has evolved into an instrument that is capable of a multitude of sounds and styles in genres ranging from pop and rock to folk to country music, blues and jazz. It served as a major component in the development of electric blues, rock and roll, rock music, heavy metal music, and many other genres of music. However, the popularity thing is wanting to separate the music to manage plays with other instruments, especially his favorite guitar without retiring). Another specific short: (Spoiler fiction: one of his metalheads group joins)

[End]

Also a quick sponosor/announcement is shout out to my stepsibling made this MASTERPIECE villain version based on the name "Talking Tony & Friends" image who requested him and it was a huge BANGER AND I LOVED IT SM<3

Designs cartoons were made by the Ttaf official website (merchandise) if you were wondering. (Characters that i drew them) :"D

Characters: Talking Ron, Roy Rakoon, Scientist Ron, and Gang Ron (one of my fanmades that are in scripting them for many examples)

『Layers: infinite (folders) 』

Program I used for very usable software: IbisPaint X (occasionally also using the fonts too)

Hope you really enjoy my authorized writing composition on the dialogue 🫶🏽ngl that took me a week to write/type all of it, and good luck with everyone's reading these, eehh...., that's too bad... if you are lazy enough to read, I'll add some a few explanations (if you have dyslexia) or maybe if you are really interested or satisfied with reading the entire essay.👍🏽

[bouncykhotchillipeppers]

Welcome to a special astrological chart reading for Yunho since it’s his birthday.

✦ Disclaimer I do not know him personally, no harm intended, others may interpret differently. I’ve been studying astrology for six years, and I take this seriously and try my best. Feel free to ask any questions you have! This is not a full chart reading, just a couple of interesting things for his birthday.

✦ Sun conjunct Jupiter in Aries (Fifth House) Sun and Jupiter love to be here, as it’s the house associated with creativity, talent, and activity. It’s what makes us feel alive. Definitely the type of person who thrives on performance and needs somewhere to channel all of that energy. It’s part of his purpose. Very playful but still a hard worker and likes to try a little bit of everything just to become better at it. Competitive. Optimistic yet realistic. Why keep doing something one way when you could do it better? He has a lot of faith that things will go well, and even if they don’t, he’ll just brush it off, learn his lesson, and move on; he takes a philosophical approach to his failures.

✦ Moon in Gemini (Eighth House) He’s sort of everywhere all at once, that Sun in 5H combined with the Gemini Moon makes him so willing to try new things just for fun. Why not? This emphasizes that playful energy, the need for banter. He’s probably good at hiding how he feels, though all emotions and thoughts will eventually surface whether he wants them to or not (as with all 8H placements), so best to be direct and honest with those (even if being direct is not his strong suit). Mimicking others comes easily to him for sure. Hm, he probably does remember that thing someone did twelve years ago that everyone else forgot about… Forgive? Sure. Forget? Never.

✦ Mars Rx in Scorpio (Twelfth House) This placement idealizes strength. People who have Mars in 12H or Mars-Neptune contacts tend to be the type who don’t complain about their problems, or if they do, it’s with the caveat that it does not make them weak. ’Tis but a scratch. Great placement for anyone involved in physical activities such as sports. Charismatic and compassionate. The retrograde is interesting because that directs a lot of the energy inward… He’s not necessarily a pushover by any means, but he is cool with just going with the flow and seeing where that takes him—but it has to be his choice. That Pluto in 1H needs control and mastery over the self. Mars in 12H tends to be fairly passive-aggressive and indirect… “I won’t do this myself, but I will help you do this.” Not a leader nor a follower but a secret third thing.

Mars square Uranus in Aquarius, he’s decisive and willful, action-oriented. He’s not the type to laze around waiting for an answer when he could easily find it out for himself. Yes, there are a lot of contradictions… Adds flavor.

Mars semisquare Pluto is interesting because it’s very much an aspect associated with extreme endurance or survival, good for (surprise!) dancers. His tolerance level is crazy high, both physically and mentally. I wouldn’t say he’s patient by any means, but it would take a lot to reach his limit.

✦ Venus-Mars-Neptune T-Square I would associate this aspect with the Prince Charming type—the ideal man, both in how others view him and what he seeks in others. Venus-Mars contacts are often found in dancers (beauty and action). More charm, more creativity. He needs to do something worthy to give to others.

✦ Pluto in Sagittarius (First House) This, along with Mars, is his chart ruler and the most important planet in his chart after the Sun and the Moon. He’s really an all or nothing type of guy, willing to push past usual boundaries in order to create a new side of himself. Very dedicated to whatever he devotes himself to. He finds the release of this pent up energy and power within himself through creative outlets (fifth house) that he gets to share with others (Jupiter).

✦ Final thoughts Overall, his chart reflects his person: playful and energetic with an intense passion. Such a nice balance because when there’s something too idealistic in his brain, he has another planet to bring him back to reality…

He’s really born to be a performer. I expected nothing less. I do think he’s fairly self-critical more than critical of others, and I hope he knows that we love his dedication and appreciate his hard work.

Thank you for reading! You can check out my other chart readings on my blog or on Twitter.

[earthstellar]

Caminus is a disabled Titan and I love him

His physical body has been completely separated into parts and fully utilised to the maximum possible degree for the sake of his Citizens

He was never going to be able to be fully repaired in the first place, and instead of even trying, he decided to put all of his remaining energy and resources into entering a permanent physical dormancy so his people would have somewhere to live and thrive

The effort it takes him to keep himself operational enough to provide the basics for his Citizens means that the strain severely impacts his remaining cognitive capacity and communicative ability

The Camiens realise the extent of Caminus' love for them, the extent of his devotion to his people being so great that he has given them every physical and mental part of himself to build upon and thrive

Even if those parts were already damaged upon arrival, it doesn't matter-- Caminus fulfils his duty into perpetuity

The most important thing the Camiens derive from Caminus himself is not fuel or power or infrastructure, but his eternal love

He has imbued his people with his creativity, curiosity, a more spiritual approach to philosophy, a cultural emphasis on friendship and mutual aid borne out of a need for resource conservation-- Thus providing environmental and resource awareness via his very state of being

We don't know much about Caminus as a person, aside from his heartbreak at the betrayal of Life Maximo and how the fallout from that was enough to send him away from Cybertron and leave Metroplex behind

But I think we can take some reasonable guesses from what we know of him through the optics of his Citizens and from what we know of his actions in general, and say that Caminus is--at his very core--devoted, loving, creative, sensitive, strong

And he is very much a disabled character. The fact that he is physically and mentally disabled is a critical part of why the Camien culture is the way it is, informed how this society developed, and even lent quite a bit to the creation/revival of Cityspeaking as an art form, which allowed him by proxy to help Metroplex from afar even while largely dormant himself

I don't see Caminus himself discussed very often, but he is absolutely one of my favourite characters

A Titan who brought an entire people and civilisation into existence, while also being physically and cognitively disabled.

He is never repaired. He cannot be repaired.

And that is fine; His love for his people is undying. His spark continues to spin, hidden far below the surface, for as long as love itself can live-- Far beyond any physical or metal tolerances, Caminus loves his people.

Forever.

And even without repairs, that is enough for the spark of a Titan.

(This isn't to romanticise the state of his health and his difficulties, but rather, is to highlight that his personal motivation is primarily his love for his people.)

Being disabled does not stop anyone from loving.

And we actually get to see that with Caminus!

In a lot of media, disabled characters are often highlighted for what they don't have, rather than what they do have and who they actually are as people.

The way Caminus is portrayed, his disabilities are critical to not just his own story but to the stories of all Camien people in one way or another. His influence and the impact of his state of health is massive.

But we also get to know who Caminus is, as a person. He values connections with others, he is loyal, creative, caring, and so on. He has significant compassion and dedication towards smaller beings, and values life. He had close relationships with his respective Prime and his "brother" (Metroplex).

I just really like Caminus a lot, idk I'm at work so this is probably not as coherent as I'd like lmao

[moroser]

[incoming long and personal and dark post]

it dawned on me that it’s april and that means it’s been 6 years since i stopped doing drugs. big achievement. i did weed the whole time, thinking i needed it to keep away from the worse stuff, but i stopped that too, almost 2 months ago now. everything i’m about to talk about i did without anyone in my life (offline) noticing and all by myself.

my entire life has been unstable and so difficult. and i mean difficult and sad. i used to drink pretty heavily, but i stopped when i found pills. i was taking pretty much any opioid i could find, i even stole them. i was text book addict with pills. i had every excuse to keep going with it, it made sense to me at the time. i was in so much pain mentally, emotionally, and eventually, physically. taking them was reprieve. 

eventually, i was taking so many a day, quite honestly i should have died. my brain was blank, i lost my creativity and i stopped drawing, which is the one thing i love the most to do. create. even though i did not stop, the fact i felt nothing in that realm anymore was heartbreaking. i’d spent several nights staring at the ceiling practically waiting to die. i had one dream that i can remember while on drugs and it was of me staring at myself opened-eyed and dead on my bed. it shook me.

the drugs affected my ability to think, cry and feel, then one day on my way to work, after taking so many, i got so sick on the side of the road on the freeway several times. eventually i pulled off into a town i didn’t know and passed out in the parking lot of a gas station for who knows how long. i woke up dazed with the taste of puke in my mouth, and totally dehydrated. i missed work, i was embarrassed with myself. i have no idea how long i sat there for before getting out of the car to walk around. eventually i made it home but i felt like i wasn’t the same after that. 

decided to detox (after trying before, and failing), which was the worst events i’ve been through in my life. took days, nearly a week to get over the worst of the symptoms. i don’t think i slept at all. i was so sick, shakes and chills, vomiting, etc. i let spongebob play for the entire time, that sponge grounded me lol. i’d made it through that time. and i stuck too it, using my desire to feel my creativity again and wanting to be better to my body to stay away from relapse. 

2017 i cleared my system of alcohol, pills, energy drinks, pop, and the only thing i’d let myself use was weed because i felt it would stop me from everything else. and technically, it did. it aided me for a long time. but the passed ~3 years i’ve been so ill with stomach issues and nausea and throwing up that i decided to stop that too. 

so now i’ve been completely sober for 1 month and 21 days. for the first time since high school i have nothing in my system that is altering me the way substance abuse has. it’s been a major adjustment. my focus is shit, my sleeping is difficult and my dreams are insanity. it literally feels like i’m sleeping just to wake up somewhere else because my dreams are so vivid and clear. i wake up every four hours having to adjust and remember i actually live here, not in dreamland. i didn’t dream at all while on drugs or weed, so in a way, i welcome the vibrancy of them. 

looking back, none of those things helped me. they only broke and shrouded my spirit with a darkness i don’t want to feel ever again. i want to be healthy and i want to give my body the chances that it deserves. i want to heal properly. i want to live so much. i want to find someone to be with that will understand me and accept me even with my flaws and history. i feel better already, but i know there’s still a long journey ahead and i can only hope it gets better. i deserve better. i know i’m a good person. i know i have so much creative potential in me and it’s what i want to give my energy and soul to.  

thanks for listening, if you read this. i am proud of myself for getting as far as i have but the support from my friends and strangers online has been a colossal sense of communal help i’ve never had offline. sharing my art has been a big help and just people enjoying it means so much to me. thank you.  

[slightlyaggressiveaffirmations]

Hey I'm having a really hard time getting out of a funk. I haven't put laundry away in weeks, and all my friends are going through things too so I can't unload on them. Not to mention my bff has a baby and now it feels like she has no time for me. I could use some positivity, thank you.

I know those feelings, frond. I had a nine-day period just recently that we all referred to as "Bed-Fest '23", cos I didn't get up or dressed or whatever.

First things first - it's OK to be in a funk. Sometimes we have one. It's totally normal. If you do absolutely nothing else, please remember to take any medication that you have - including anything for depression or other mental illness. Even if you can't shower or even eat - take your meds.

Second, prioritise those tasks that are most important and focus the energy you have on making sure that those get done. After medication, my list goes like this: dog's needs met, food/drink, safe environment, shower, tooth brush, washing clothes, clean environment.

By "safe environment" I mean keeping my kitchen clean and cleaning up after myself so food waste and such is not left lying around, which might attract mice, cockroaches, ants, mould and so on. Making sure my house isn't a health hazard, basically. Whereas "clean environment" is putting things away where they belong, like with your laundry. I also work from my bed outwards with a clean environment - if I'm spending all my time in bed, that immediate area gets cleaned first.

As for getting out of the funk - focusing on getting as much of the self care list done as you can - but not scolding yourself and engaging in negative talk when you do not, is how we start. Go to work, or school or whatever you gotta do, and then use what energy you can bear to do what you can. Then give yourself permission to just be. Do what will give you peace. Video games, reading, Netflix, extra sleep. Treat yourself and have no guilt or shame about it. This is what you NEED right now.

When you've recovered some energy by not forcing yourself to do too much, get creative. I write poetry and I draw in abstract colours. I put my emotions onto the page - whenever I'm in a depression or slump, there's a reason for it. There's emotions behind it and if you have an outlet to let those emotions out and into the world, they will start to seep out of you and ease you out of the funk. Your feelings are stuck inside you and need somewhere to go.

Get back into the swing of life slowly and as you feel up to it. Even if you don't have any friends available, it's good to talk to someone about the progress you're making - so you could even just blog about it on Tumblr. I just report in to my partner and mother. "Today I got two loads of washing done, and then I didn't really do much else, I just read a bunch of fanfic, but I left comments on it all, which is active instead of passive."

I hope that at least some of this advice is helpful. I never know if I have any advice in me until someone asks me a question. The life of an Accidental Agony Aunt.

The Slightly Aggressive Affirmer

[graysparrowao3]

🚀 👓 annnnnd 📗 for the ask game!!! ☺️

Well heckin' beans, I was truly spoiled by this ask game. Thank you Darcy for the ask and for sharing all the details about your Tav! 💛

🚀 Do you like to outline your fic first or create as you go?

(@keepyourstyle was gracious to ask this here, and I got carried away having never thought about it much before. I will be less unhinged and more concise.)

The short(er) answer is I do not outline. I actually think one of the reasons I stopped writing was that all the advice I saw at the time was regarding planning and outlining and I was so bad at it I felt I wasn't capable. Turns out it just in part stifled the creativity for me.

As far as creating as I go, I'll say 2 main things I do:

I start with dialogue that speaks with me, usually moments with emotional content or subtext and just keep adding dialogue all over the place with line breaks between in a non linear way, building, editing, moving it, until a narrative has formed and then I gradually fill in all the gaps with description, action, etc.

I add things that are not yet revealed to the reader, even if I don't yet know them either. The main example is at the start of the "What If" Rolan fic, Lia throws something at Rolan. This turned into a heavy thematic element throughout the story, but I didn't know what she threw at that point. When I'd let it sit for a while it was able to find an organic space in the story for what felt right as it occurred.

👓 What helps you focus when you write?

(@lemonsrosesandlavender kindly also asked this here! I'll add onto it a little differently.)

I used to say music, but actually I find that distracting now. Sometimes I'll put on headphones but not actually play anything, which does help. Basically as few distractions as possible, and nothing interrupting my flow.

Also, the physical space being somewhere I feel both comfortable but not too relaxed, able to give my entire attention to the writing. Giving time and space away to let the creative juices reboot before coming back to it. Not forcing it when I'm too stressed or otherwise not in the right headspace. Making notes whenever a small idea or line pops into my head so I don't forget it and can use it to spring off later when I've got more time or energy.

📗 Do you want to write something outside of fanfiction? If so, what about?

I have written non-fiction as part of my field, broadly with regards to mental health, but my god, if I could ever have some original fiction out there I think young me would think I finally made it.

I always wrote fantasy of some kind. One thing I was working on revolved around siblings and their shared traumas (no surprises I was drawn to Rolan, Cal, & Lia). The other thing I was working on also featured found families but had more romance. Neither are anywhere close to a publishable standard, I've been having a lot of fun just writing low pressure with fanfic and community for a bit, but "want to" have other things written? Absolutely.

[sketchyandirregular]

Finally, I finished the new reference sheets for this little oc series! Now I can scream into the void about them, and then probably go back to alternating between reblogging fandom stuff and sheer radio silence until my next spontaneous oc post. Not that anyone’s in the audience anyway, but yknow, they’re also visible on my Toyhou.se.

Offbeat Avenue is a strange slice of fantasy universe that I’ve been tinkering with for several years. It ultimately revolves around the everyday troubles and chaos of two human-demon halfblood twins, whose measly mentally ill little lives are the somewhat disparate foreground to an arguably unnecessarily vast interdimensional magical backdrop. The titular place is the street which they live on, in a human city with an ambitious tech scene, modern socioeconomic classism, and a mysterious, rumored-to-be-enchanted forest. The main themes include found family, the power of community, and self-improvement.

Being as old of an oc project as it is, it’s just plain convoluted. Somewhere in my dusty old skull is a dream to turn it into an animated show or comic or creative property of some kind, so I’ve been clanging away at it intermittently between the woes of art college and lying motionless in my room after every stressful day of doing things… Well, that and comfort characters is my favorite kind of copium. I assume the sea of fandom-focused Tumblr is an ok place to drop these rambles because I guess it means I don’t have to really confront my fear of putting my work out there, yet. (How does one learn to balance professionalism and being real with an audience? I swear I just feel lame and overshare-y every time.)

Anywho, the main cast is as follows:

HATSUMOTO HIRABAYASHI: A human/demon halfblood that inherited so little magic that everyone decided it entitled him to the family heirloom of an animated snake amulet guardian. Good thing his parents gave that to him before dying in a car crash. Add in a second car crash and “gift” of a bionic eye, and now he feels indebted to the local faceless tech corporation that inspired him in his youth, who’s generously given this high school dropout a rather unfulfilling janitorial job at one of their offices. Hooray. At least he can talk a walk into the fenced-off mysterious forest behind his backyard when he’s sad.

He’s known for being an anxious depressed mess with a nerdy heart in robotics, reptiles, and fantasy. You can tell them apart because upon being thrust anywhere out of his house, Hatsu will always look like he’s hoping he can melt into dust and disintegrate. Despite being 6’7” just like his brother, he slouches practically enough to pass as 5’10’. Sometimes, you could catch him jotting down sci-fi dreams and ideas in a notebook that he will downplay as “nothing”.

Romance-wise, his girlfriend is a witch (belonging to WhiteRabbitTea’s “Storytime” on Toyhou.se) who, in addition to being caught in her own battles, has been trying to convince Hats that he’s strong enough to fight his battles— both the one with his inner demons and the one with his sucky coworkers.

DH (demon hatsumoto) HIRABAYASHI: A human/demon halfblood that inherited so much magic that he hardly knows what to do with all the portals, teleporting, and time on his hands. Too bad his parents didn’t warn him how to use it before he caused a car crash. Add in an existential crisis and inferiority complex from magical soul troubles in his youth manifesting as something akin a Hollywood version of DID, and now he’s very dangerous and maladapted even after Hats’ gf helped separate them with a mirror spell. At least his skills help him be a fearsome mercenary. Hooray?

To the dismay of his brother, he’s known for interdimensional chaos so superficial that it usually entails him opening portals to just use the void beyond as a cooler for vodka. His shark tooth grin is just as infamous, next only to his insatiable appetite. A guy’s gotta get the energy for his demon magic somehow. Other than, he has a surprisingly artistic streak, especially in graffiti.

Romance-wise, his theyfriend is a witch (also belonging to WhiteRabbitTea) in a similar existential “evil twin” situation, who compliments DH’s loud, brash violence with a quiet, poetic glare. They’ve tried to convince DH to stop burning his own paintings, but finds better success at calming him with home cooked food.

WILLA WARDLOW: A little bunny girl stuck in Hatsu’s city after a family trip to study the enchanted forest went up in flames. One traumatizing adjustment later, and she’s sent to live with the Hirabayashi twins, sparking a newfound sense of brotherly responsibility in Hatsu and a newfound protectiveness in DH. She herself wasn’t born magical, but the arcane happenings around her are very inspirational.

Not many know her, since Hats’ anxiety means he tries to keep her at home and out of trouble, but to the rest of the cast, she’s either known as the ambitious witchling—drawn to fantasy literature, role play games, and studying the oddities of her brothers’ neighborhood— or the glue that keeps the twins reluctantly together.

MALLY STONEBREATH: What was once a human was turned into a hodgepodge of cat, wolf, dragon, and who knows what else by an unauthorized homemade mad scientist living in Hatsu’s neighborhood and obsessed with the forest. He, then a baby, was deemed a failure and thrown away like a doll before being found by curious dragonlings playing raccoon. Long story short, he now lives happily with a draconic polycule family in the enchanted woods. Under the cover of night, he likes to wander into the city, inheriting his brothers’ curiosity.

Their family named them “Malice” as an inside joke for how their optimism and naïveté often landed him in trouble. Eventually, their nickname came about as a more accurate way to describe them. Other than that, ideally, no one outside the woods but Hatsu and his few friends know about them at all. Said small circle sees them as a ray of sunlight— the new perspective that Hatsu kinda needs… even if they have trouble understanding how positivity can be toxic.

ELIJAH EMERAGOLD: A teenage elf that doesn’t really remember his bio parents or the demonic force that pushed them to emigrate across dimensions anymore. His main concern these days is managing the bar that his late adoptive human grandad left him, making sure his brother doesn’t get back into depression drinking, and grappling with his sheltered childhood. This latter battle has led him to seek out real battles as a mercenary— a hole that he dug with the help of a shapeshifter, and which constantly brings him face to face with jaded pessimism and questions of morality.

He’s known as the stoic, grumpy counterpart to his brother— someone who bar patrons know not to pester, or else. Unfortunately, his friends know that this murderous silhouette is mostly a facade; he’s really a relatively stand-up, if not pretty stuck-up, silly little guy. His brother, most of all, knows him as the quiet, smart, prone-to-being-overstimulated, musician and archer.

ELLIOT EMERAGOLD: A elf that’s still rather stuck in the nervous, agoraphobic habits ingrained by well meaning parents as refugees from the demon king’s conquests. After the disappearance of his parents and death of the kindly bar owner that took them in, he tends to spend his days steeped in a somber grief, not that most people notice with his warm smile and friendly demeanor.

He’s known as the life of the family bar, entertaining patrons both magical and not with telekinetic tricks and casual conversation. He loves hearing the stories of other people’s adventures and travels— except for that of his brother and his merc friends. He often feels like he failed Eli as an older sibling.

Romance-wise, his boyfriend is Zack (belonging to cnidaria4’s “What Do They Know” on Toyhou.se), a kind of demon, who can, in short, relate to having met a very unfriendly world. They compliment each other well— the introvert to Elliot’s thoughtful extrovert.

AMY MIMIKRE: A pink shapeshifter inheriting the infamous mercenary title of her family, alongside the questionable ethics and logic that comes with having been raised in a life of crime— by which I mean, she’s loyal to a fault to those she sees as worthy company and crew, but also sees no issue in hiring teenagers. The more the merrier, am I right? No interdimensional nomad’s life is complete if they’re always lonely at camp.

They’re known in the verboten underbelly of magic society as “The Pink Thunder”, a vicious predator that can appear either as a house cat or a full on panther depending on the size of your bounty or whether you’ve wronged her. Her friends know her more as a quirky older sibling, who can both give a tough spar when you need a distraction, or even occasionally sprout some kind of odd wisdom about chosen family or having confidence.

Other than that, there’s some other side characters, including a dwarf mayor of a criminal town that runs on a truce agreement, the exasperated Lord of the Underworld, the occasional odd neighbor, and more that hasn’t yet exactly been fleshed out!

I guess I’m done rambling for now.

[ironduke10]

tagged by: @irish-urn tagging: @awakening5 @northernnoir @lilunaire @blooming-gwens

number of stories posted to ao3 for 2024: 3 (2 of those being current WIPs) I'm low volume when it comes to this stuff.

word counted posted for last year: ~55K. Yeah that's light, but I have 3 kiddos to bus around after school to their various things and I get maybe an hour a day for myself.

fandoms i wrote for: Sony's Spider-Verse universe (currently comprised of the films Into The Spider-Verse, Across The Spider-Verse, and someday...2026??...Beyond The Spider-Verse)

pairings: Miles Morales and Gwen Stacy, aka Gwiles, aka Ghostflower, aka those two adorable dorks

stories with the most

KUDOS: THE Talk Between A Father And His Son (451) <- which is really weird because it's just this short little fluff thing on a dad teaching his son about the 5 love languages in a relationship BOOKMARKS (including private): Are You My Mother (146) COMMENT THREADS: Are You My Mother (69)

work i’m most proud of (and why): "Are You My Mother" which I wrote in tribute for my own mother who passed away when I was young (presumably much like Gwen's). In the movie ATSV, when I saw 5 seconds of silent staring between Gwen and Rio and later when Luna Lauren Velez (Rio's VA) explained the cultural significance of Bendicion/Que Dios Te Bendiga in an interview, I thought to myself...I bet I can do this.

share or describe a favorite review you received: I must state up front that my favorite reviews remains the ones from my 11 YO daughter (who is a creative writer herself), when I drive her to ballet or karate and she's going on and on about something I wrote she liked. That's parental nirvana right there. It makes the hours and hours of crafting a story all worth it.

But from an AO3 perspective, I have been blessed with many amazing and heartwarming comments. A lot of my favorites have to do with readers saying they like how I write the parents, or how they can see their parents in what I write, or they have healed because of the way I depicted parental love. All that is great! Because I'm a dad! So it's good to know I can write parents well. But the funniest review I ever got was from my most consistent commenter MasterInsaniac when he said:

"Somehow you have managed to balance the high romance that is Miles and Gwen along with the fact that they are both horny teenagers."

I laughed a lot after reading that.

a time when writing was really, really hard: The 3rd chapter (30K WC) of my Christmas fic (For Everything There Is A Season) was a slog. Man I was burnt out after writing that. It's not like I didn't know where I was going or had a mental block, but it just took so much time and energy to stick to the plan.

On my current WIP (Que Sera Sera) I swear Im 10/11ths done with Chapter 2, but there's this very last scene (not the ending) I'm currently tackling and it's the most pissed off I've ever been at a scene because the prose just isn't coming off in a way that I like. I really hope I stick the landing on that scene so I can publish.

a scene or character you wrote that surprised you: Due to what I do in real life for a profession, when I started doing this fanfic hobby thing, I took to outlining and planning early on. I like to know what I'm getting into when I'm trying to put digital pen to digital paper. However, though I do not like the actual act of writing very much at all, there are some times I admit where it gets random when I write and there are these "Ah-Ha" moments that are super cool to live through. Like a bolt of lightning comes into your head and your fingers just fly and know what to do on their own. That's a trip.

So. When I wrote about the post-BTSV dance for Miles and Gwen that everybody in the fandom is hoping that they get ("Requests and Promises"), I had planned all along to give Gwen some closure on her Peter's death and I had planned to end it somewhere on the dance floor. But then my fingers wrote into Gwen's mouth: "Miles I got another request for you," before my brain caught up and at first I said to myself - "what on earth is Gwen asking that for, I thought I was ending it now." Then my brain caught up and realized "Gwen's going to take Miles to Peter's gravestone. Ohhhhh." And then stream of consciousness pretty much took over from that point on and Gwen did the leading, not me. That was pretty neat to experience.

a favorite excerpt of your writing: Hmm this will be tough to nail down but I suppose it's this moment in "Are You My Mother" when Rio is laying it all on the line and unveiling her true intentions to Gwen in full (that is that she would love to be a sort of surrogate mother to Gwen). I channeled 3 different women in my life, to come up with this dialogue which just poured out of my head. One of those bolt of lightning moments.

“A mother’s love knows no history and has no bounds.  It is unconditional, mija.  It can’t be explained any more than that.  That is my love for you, Gwen.  It just exists.  That’s it.  And it’s not going to be scared away.”

how did you grow as a writer last year: Eh I don't like calling myself a "writer." I'm just a dad who is writing Spider-Verse fanfic at the behest of my daughter who absolutely loves these movies - specifically Gwen Stacy. I had a couple of commenters say that they can tell that I'm getting better, which is nice to hear.

who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer, beta, cheerleader, etc.): I don't want to single out one person as I am lucky to be connected to many talented writers in my fandom on Discord, all of whom I ask for advice - and if they're on Tumblr they're pretty much all linked up top

anything from your real life show up in your writing last year: A very very tiny slice of it. I had a family - that we're really close to - unexpectedly move away from us last year and that was quite painful to go through for my wife and I. So in my Christmas fic, there's a moment where May and Ben move away from George (which was always going to happen), but that little life moment helped me describe George's feelings in a little better detail. Blink and you'll miss it.

any new wisdom you can share with other writers: This is not new wisdom, but I have seen sometimes other writers in a variety of fandoms doubt themselves and be embarrassed to publish. I'd say that you have to write for yourself first and foremost. You're your own #1 customer of the fic you generate. As long as you're happy rereading your stuff, who gives a flying rat's ass about what some negative commenter might say?

any projects you’re looking to starting (or finishing) this year: In 2025, Que Sera Sera is definitely getting finished. I'll crank out a few more Ganke Ghostflower drabbles. Then I'd like to tackle and hopefully complete a 5+1 concept I've had in my head. I always wanted to do a 5+1. Now I hope for my own sanity I can keep that fic on the shorter side...

[emeritus-fuckers]

What's my role in the Ministry? (Ghost account: @gothdaddyissues)

1 - Sibling of Sin or Ghoul? Definitely a Sibling of Sin! While I love Ghouls, they are a bit too chaotic for me!

2 - Which Papa would I prefer to work with? Cardinal Copia / Papa IV - I relate to his energy (awkward, bad jokes, silly, secretly a ho - plus we're the same age)

3 - Introvert/ambivert/extrovert? 100% introvert. I don't have the mental energy to be super outgoing and 'fun at parties.' But if I connect with someone, I will gladly spend tons of time with them in contentment - it just has to be the right people, y'know?

4 - Chores? I love cooking/baking and I love organizing stuff. I keep things clean and tidy. Much prefer indoor chores to outdoor chores.

5 - Travel or stay at home? Unless it's somewhere I REALLY want to go, I'm staying home. I like being comfy.

6 - Freebie? I've been an Admin Assistant for decades and know my office/business shit. I love being creative, especially writing and making things with my hands. I generally like animals more than people (I have many pets, I feed wild animals, etc). I love goth/spooky stuff/ghosts/cemeteries/Tarot cards. I've been a rock 'n' roll girl since the 80's.

🖤💙🖤💙🖤💙

This post is part of the 1000 followers role in Ministry event. Entries (asks) for the event close on 23rd October.

Your role in the Ministry is… Personal assistant to Papa IV

Copia saw how good you were at your job as an Admin Assistant and immediatly made you his PA. He relies on you. He also recognised someone with a similar energy to him.

He enjoys your company too. You often end up working together in contented silence or if you have time just chatting over a hot drink.

You also get to help write some of his speeches for him. He'll often give you tasks/ask for help with things that involve being creative.

He also wants to learn how to bake so you spend a few afternoons a week teaching him. He once opened a flour packet and it practically exploded flour going everywhere. Despite both of you trying to clean it up his hair was still looking a little greyer than usual for the service that evening.

He went through a particulary tough time with work being very busy. You tidied his office for him (which had become messy) and sorted all his work. He thanked you loads and gave you a massive hug. The next day you found flowers on your desk which he had picked from Primo's garden (he'd checked with Primo first).

You also get to spend a lot of time with his rats, they keep you company while you work (especially if Copia is away). You know them all by name and they all know you now.

Since you don't like travelling Copia always brings you something back from tour. If there is anywhere your really want to go he'll find an excuse to fly you out there.

~

Written by Nyx