#i have so many thoughts that i think are just 'i am more oppressed in society and it bothers me that u don't have to think about this'

[tumblasha]

maybe i'm just being misogynistic

because there's no reason why i shouldn't like you

because i've met people who interrupt me before

because i've met people who talk too much before

because i've met people who travel to a country and don't know the language before

and they're ... fine?

there's so many aspects that i don't like in people across the world that just happen to be compounded in you. i value my friends for being people who Listen to me [1], for being people who wouldn't cut me off when i'm trying to say something

i value natural curiosity. if you wonder something and need to know the answer, why should i be the force that stops you from asking a question?

and your job is anthropology, you're an ethnographer. you're supposed to be curious and invade ask about people's lives like this. your Job is a direct descendant of the people that take take take stories out of people's communities.

but knowledge is supposed to be shared! the job can't be all that bad right?

and it's not like boys are socialized to ask questions [2]

and i'm jealous. because i feel like i have a delay in getting to know people [3]. and you manage to make people like you because you make them talk about themselves. you're able to invite people to your birthday party in a country that you've spent six (6) weeks in because you know how to make people like you

and how could i do anything you do? i can't go to a country where i don't speak the language (guilt). i can't bring myself to care enough about new people to ask them questions about their lives. i can't do it because i get overwhelmed and i need my ipad enrichment time [4]

but lately others have been catching on. they shush you when you're speaking over the waiter. they finish their sentence when you ask a question. sometimes they don't even answer your question. they look at Me when i'm talking and i put my hand out to shush you every time you interrupt me.

maybe i'm just being misogynistic. because you're a girl who talks a lot. i'm not either. and why should you have to burden my hatred?

---

[1] i almost had a falling out with a friend in high school bc they acted in a way that showed that they didn't listen to something i said. mind you this was in my (soft spoken) era. nobody could hear me say shit

[2] it's actually Impossible to receive gossip from a man. they never ask questions! follow me for more fun facts :)

[3] historically it takes me two (2) years to find Actual Friends whenever i switch schools / cities / places

[4] everyone should play hello kitty island adventure and stardew valley

---

tl;dr: i hate people who interrupt me or ignore mre and maybe i should just get over it

[pyrriax]

i think i'll spontaneously combust when i hit 20k posts on this blog. what the hell. (my queue is putting in the work. also the multiple reblogs of the same posts because i have a Point to make.)

[marlshroom]

i will never ever stop thinking about the disability allegories in gravity falls. i cant ever stop thinking about disability allegories in other media and gravity falls is no different. im feeling chatty today, so lets see if i can articulate all my feelings on the matter.

the most interesting thing that stuck out to me with thisisnotawebsitedotcom.com was this snippet on fords medical paper:

we hear about this kind of attitude towards disabilities often, maybe you have heard about autism being referred to as the "next evolutionary change in humans." we can especially see this when a person has a disability, but is also very capable in other fields. there are so many cases in the medical or educational field of a child having specific needs, yet they are ignored due to them being "gifted".

in a vacuum, ford's extra finger may not be considered a disability, the sixth finger allows him more movement and dexterity, and ontop of that, he's a genius. its just an extra finger right? its not like it hurts him. but it does hurt him. he is a child living with a limb difference, he is constantly ridiculed by his peers. they call him a freak and physically harass him.

this is where we dip into the social model of disability here. i know sometimes that can cause a little bit of discourse, but i think its interesting to note here! please if you have a limb difference feel free to add your perspective or correct me where you see fit. if you don't know what the social model of disability is, its the perspective that disabled people would not be as limited in their abilities if it wasn't for the oppressive society that they lived in(think people in wheelchairs could do more things if infrastructure had disabled people in mind). ford wouldn't be experiencing abliesm in his life if limb differences were something people were educated about. then we get to bill cipher. in theory, his ability to see the 3rd dimension is almost a super power. but in the book of bill its literally stated that it is illegal for anyone to mention the possibility of "up". he is forced into abusive medical practices where he is being drugged to suppress his ability. no one in his dimension has the same perspective of him, he is completely alone, and even worse, the people who should be protecting him like his parents and doctors are abusing him(not that his parents are evil for this obviously. they don't have a choice and i assume they want what is best for him, what were they supposed to do? yet it still had this horrible impact on bill).

this social model can be applied to bill cipher. he has this ability that in a vacuum would be considered amazing, but he lives in a society(rip) that oppresses this. they have to, because bill trying to let his dimension see the stars killed every last person. which makes me think that whoever was in power here probably knew this would happen. its unsure if bill cipher knew the true extent of his damage would be, but i am of the belief that he didn't know how bad it would really be.

i just find all of this very interesting. i really love when a story tackles a topic such as disability. its so obvious this is what alex hirsch is going for and its such a unique take that i don't see often in media, as a disabled person myself. feel free to lmk your thoughts :)

[weirdmageddon]

the original post i want everyone to see is way out of my hands now, so i’ll repost this again here as new but separate post. it touches on things i want to go into more depth about.

@wasabikitcat gets this idea. this reply—thank you so much for not just understanding what i was going for, but putting my exact thoughts into cleaner words on the bad reading comprehension site.

i can't believe how misunderstood my point was about “spirituality” (i didn’t know it was that much of a loaded phrase!), but thank you for putting what i meant into more nuanced terms.

it's something that can be hard for me to put into words, and maybe i gave people the wrong impression by using the word "spirituality", since words mean different things to different people. i just haven't seen people discussing it so i wasn't sure how to really put it. but regardless of terminology, this reply is exactly what i'm getting at. and this is coming from someone who has a very scientific mind. i wouldnt even consider myself a traditionally “spiritual” person in the normal connotation of the word.

edit: this one as well!

i see this as a cultural/political factor that we shouldn’t ignore, because this sense of meaning has driven people's motivations since the beginning of human civilization.

there's a primal aspect that hasn't really left us but there seems to be no room for it in our modern culture because half of these “guides” seem to be driven by “i cant wait for civilization to collapse so MY ideology can rise from the ashes" and the other half of it seems to be driven by greed. and often they are hand in hand.

i would really like to see actual enlightening ideas stemming from buddhist thought, analytical psychology, collective unconscious, and archetypes to take off in the public consciousness. (completely divorced from jordan peterson. just the original jungian stuff)

i am especially supportive towards getting people interested in carl jung's works. his idea was to get people to understand, "what myth am i living?" based on the same archetypes and symbols that recur time and time again throughout human history that we can all collectively recognize regardless of culture. so it's a sense of meaning based in the self. i don't want people being sent down reactionary paths when looking for meaning in their lives.

i think it would benefit people to who feel lost especially in uncertain/unprecedented times like, with those “there's got to be more to this, something deeper,” insinct. i see that people are looking for this but get taken advantage of or manipulated.

but on this deeper sense of meaning in life thing, the Left isn't doing a great job at providing an option for “lost” people looking for meaning that the Right seems to be having no trouble with. i wonder if this is why we've seen so many of these lost young men flock to reactionary commentators?

this reminds me of an excellent point contrapoints made in her video about jordan peterson, saying,

“The last thing I like is that you talk about deep shit. I was watching a video where you and a couple of zany goons were talking about Plato and Aristotle and the meaning of life. And I thought, ‘Huh… on the Left, we don’t really talk about that kind of thing. All we talk about is how society oppresses people.’ And that might not be enough. Because people need to have a positive purpose in life. I mean, personally, I don’t give a shit. I’m pretty happy to sit here watching the same three seasons of Strangers with Candy until I die. But other people, like Dostoevsky, Camus, other white guys who talk about lobsters…they have this need to have purpose in the face of suffering, and like, not just complain about patriarchy. I guess it’s easier to not complain about patriarchy when patriarchy isn’t the thing that’s making you suffer. But I do think that an education that only teaches people about oppression is inadequate. We spend four years teaching undergraduates why capitalism is bad, and then we say, ‘Well, you’re educated now. Good luck getting a job under capitalism, bye!’ …And that really kind of sucks! But you know, I think that’s a point that can probably be made without comparing transgender activism to Stalin.”

speaking of her, this is a related post i wrote earlier on young men being radicalized and how to approach communication

and by the way, if you are interested in learning jungian psychology and want to see what it’s about, here are some resources to get you started:

i think the jung subreddit has a great collection of resources on its about page.

i highly recommend Demystifying Jungian Psychology to start. it’s meant for beginners. it is available in english and spanish. you can currently find the book in the comments section here. since sometimes these links lead to a 404, i don’t want to link directly to the google drive page. i want you to have a link to the original thread in case it gets broken.

[rainbowsky]

Sorry I've taken so long to address this, I've had a very busy day and didn't have time to finish this post (which I started yesterday).

I'm talking, of course, about the incredibly controversial situation surrounding DD right now. I've gotten some messages about it so I figured I'd give my thoughts in a bigger post so that I don't have to keep repeating myself.

(CW: racism, spoilers FPU)

I know that by now most people are aware of the situation, but I'm going to start from square one for those who are just catching up on the topic.

There is a scene in Formed Police Unit where Chinese UN peacekeeping troops need to rescue a group of citizens who are surrounded by terrorists. In order to accomplish this they disguise themselves as people from the community. This being Africa, the troops were disguised using blackface.

Yes, I am saying that DD and his castmates appear in the film in blackface.

I am not going to post a picture of that here. It's just something I can't post on my blog. I understand that many of you will want to see for yourself so I'll link a clip of the scene, which was posted on Weibo. Please be aware before clicking - this is full-on blackface. Always take care of yourselves, and if you think it might be upsetting to you don't click. You don't need to see it to be a 'good fan'.

Background

For those who may not know, this movie was filmed years ago, in 2021. During those years I have seen many anti attacks against DD, claiming that he is racist and has worn blackface. Here's the photo that was circulating back then.

At the time I thought the makeup that he was wearing was likely anti-reflective black paint or camouflage paint such as is used by snipers (which he played in the film). I assumed that he was wearing his own hoodie over part of a military costume, because he was wearing a cammo shirt and what might have been combat trousers.

I was certainly not expecting full-on blackface from this movie.

There's no getting around it - this is extremely difficult to look at.

Blackface is widely viewed as offensive and racist. It shouldn't be hard to understand why. Putting on another person's ethnicity like a costume is deeply insensitive, particularly when you consider that BIPOC (black, indigenous, and other people of color) are so frequently targeted, exploited and marginalized. For those in positions of privilege and power to put on the appearance of the people who they oppress and exploit... it's just shocking and awful.

Blackface is most frequently talked about in an American context, but it's actually a problem globally - including in China. More on all that here.

The film

I have not actually seen the film, so I don't know much about the context beyond what is being discussed in the fandom. As I said earlier, in the film a group of UN police officers need to infiltrate an area in the community, and they take on disguises in order to do so.

In promotional media this film is being presented as based on true stories from real missions*. It seems the situation in question really happened on a Chinese peacekeeping mission, and the UN troops disguised themselves as black citizens in order to infiltrate and extract the endangered captives.

*I'm going to give them the benefit of the doubt on this because it doesn't change how I feel it should have been handled.

This is important context that is being conveniently left out of much of the backlash about this situation. People are outright claiming that DD plays a black person in the movie - that he wore blackface to perform a role that a black actor could have played. This simply isn't true, and people making these claims are antis and liars. There's simply no excuse for not knowing the full context.

Having said that, I don't really think it matters how it ended up in the film. I do not think there is such a thing as a palatable or appropriate use of blackface. In this day and age it is nearly universally understood to be racist, and it's extremely controversial.

I can understand if they were trying to be accurate to the mission that they were portraying, but surely there are other ways they could have accomplished this scene (perhaps with the clothing but not the blackface). 'Historical accuracy' isn't as important as cultural sensitivity, not by any stretch of the imagination. In the interest of respecting audiences they could have adapted the scene to make the use of blackface unnecessary.

I really see no excuse for anything like this in 2024.

Audience reactions

Chinese sensibilities around these topics are very different from what we are used to in the West.

According to fan repos audiences initially didn't recognize any of the actors, and once it became apparent that they were in disguise, laughter erupted around the room. In fact, most fans are laughing a lot at the photos and video even on social media (although some Chinese netizens have been upset by it and have voiced complaints to various stakeholders).

It is also being widely discussed on Chinese social media as an exciting scene of heroism in the film.

I feel the need to point out that the laughter and mockery is a huge part of the harm, here. As if it's not bad enough that these actors are performing in blackface and presenting a perversion of black ethnicity, it also becomes an opportunity for audiences to mock and disrespect black people. It's become an opportunity for social media to be filled with racist jokes and mockery.

Roadshow statements

There have been some clips circulating of PR and roadshow moments with black cast members and some black audience members who have spoken up in support of the film and to thank the cast and crew for telling the story. Here's one example.

International fans have been dismissing those statements as ignorant or coerced, which I think is offensive and deeply fucked up. There's no planet on which I'm going to - with a totally straight face - say that a black person's response to the movie is not legitimate just because it doesn't comport with my own view.

This is a complex issue and there are inevitably going to be a lot of different perspectives. I hope people won't exacerbate the problem by supplanting black voices on this issue with their own, no matter what's being said. If there's any manipulation going on, let's assume it was in their choosing supportive black figures to speak for the film rather than claim that the black spokespeople are insincere.

China has a lot of issues with racism, there's no doubt about it. It's a huge part of why so many people try to whiten their skin, or why they mock each other when their skin gets tanned/darker. There is a lot of sinister, fucked up stuff going on in China around race - both in the country and in their dealings with other countries.

But we can't claim to speak for black people in China, particularly when they are speaking for themselves! I would hope this is extremely obvious!

Where's DD in all this?

It's understandable that bystanders will react to what they're seeing and might immediately deem it unacceptable - and DD along with it. Their reactions are valid, but as fans I hope that we can look at him with a bit more empathy. I hope that we can take a moment to try to see things from his perspective.

DD has been interested in and an avid fan of black culture since he was a small child. We've all seen how much he immerses himself in hip hop, street dance and the accompanying music and fashion. And yes, he's been accused of cultural appropriation in the past for wearing locs and durags.

However, I think fans need a bit of perspective here to get a sense of where DD might be coming from. Here's a guy who loves black culture, who has close friends who are black, who regularly works with black artists and who supports black artists, in a culture where racism against black people is prevalent and often extreme.

I think DD would probably be amazed to hear the accusations of racism against him. He likely has very few people in his orbit who are anywhere near as supportive of or as closely connected to black people as he is. He likely stands out in his circle as being particularly into black culture and connected with black artists, and probably regularly faces ignorant questions or digs from people around him about his close association with black artists and culture.

Not just because of racism alone, but also due to the racist parallels the government tends to draw between black culture, street dance, hip hop, etc. and criminality/moral degradation*. It's likely that ignorant people in his orbit have expressed concern or wariness toward him because of these associations.

*That is, until breakdancing became an Olympic sport, then they were suddenly onboard with some of it.

I'm not saying that he doesn't have a lot of learning to do (and if this situation becomes what I think it might become, he'll have a big opportunity to do so), I'm just saying that his ignorance isn't mean-spirited. He's coming at this from a totally different angle than any of us are, and he is immersed in a totally different cultural perspective than our own. In his world, his interest likely makes him a bit of an anomaly.

So those painting him as a horrible racist... it's just not how I see it.

The element of choice

I've heard many people say that DD 'didn't have any choice' about this role, that turning it down would not have been an option or that he would be under some kind of threat if he didn't take this role. I don't agree with that characterization of things. I don't think it's quite as 'gun to the head' as a lot of fans paint it.

I think it's more likely that he simply didn't realize that the role would involve blackface when he accepted it, or that he thought that blackface in this context - to infiltrate a terrorist cell and save civilians - would be fine. We don't need to depict China as forcibly compelling actors to take unwanted roles if we want to make sense of this. There are simpler, more logical explanations.

DD wouldn't have been the one deciding how to depict the scene - he didn't have that power in 2021 - but I also doubt he would have had a major problem with it given everything we know.

We must overcome our Western tendency to see things only from our own perspective. This has a totally different cultural context in China, and the voices we listen to about it should not be issuing exclusively from white faces that are not at ground zero of this situation.

Final thoughts

This film has had me worried from day one. I think most people have been expecting it to be full of offensive portrayals and propagandistic fuckery. There are so many ways in which a Chinese film about the UN is potentially a sticky, tricky mess. This blackface thing is likely just one problem on a towering pile of problems.

However, I'm not going to sugarcoat this - this has the potential to be a real shitshow for DD, and I am concerned. Especially if this film gets an international release.

We need to brace ourselves, because I don't think this is going to just disappear. DD has endorsements with international brands, and this could definitely cause backlash for those brands unless the issue is addressed and the scenes removed. There's no planet on which brands like Chanel and Lacoste can afford to have one of their spokespeople plastered everywhere in blackface.

If this film gets an international release and those scenes are left intact, it's possible he will lose some brands.

Let's hope it doesn't come to that, but let's face it - things like this have consequences, and that's why it's so important for producers and artists to be sensitive about what they're portraying.

While I think there's some endorsement risk here for DD, and the potential loss of some international fans, I want to be clear about one thing: I don't think this will threaten his career overall. In China this just isn't an issue in the way it is internationally.

I do hope the film team addresses this issue in some way, ideally by removing the scenes. They just finished doing a massive edit to remove ZZH from the film, surely they can handle something like this. But let's not hold our breath...

Everyone has the right to make up their minds about DD. As I've often said, being a turtle isn't for the faint of heart. That's not just because turtles are frequent targets for bullies, or because we have to constantly live with uncertainty and doubt.

Being an international turtle also isn't for the faint of heart because there are a lot of cultural and political minefields to navigate, and many ideological differences to adapt to. There's a huge learning curve and a lot of unknowns, and turtles who want to survive have to make peace with the fact that we and the boys are from different worlds in many ways. We may never know where they really stand on issues that are important to us.

However, in this case I feel confident that I know where DD's heart is on this issue. He simply doesn't hold hatred, disrespect or disdain for black people. Quite the contrary.

I think we'd all just feel a lot better if he had a good grasp on how to be a better ally.

And while we're waiting for that, I think we should put our money where our mouths are and learn more about these issues ourselves, both in China and locally at home. We want DD to be a better person; let's be better people too.

Edit: more on this here.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

i am confused

Making this its own separate post + expanding on it so it doesn’t get lost in the quagmire that is the book 7 part 8 update 💀

Feel free to let me know your own thoughts or theories too, I’m just rambling here.

***Spoilers below the cut!!***

So like… Is anyone else confused as to how Silver can use his UM Meet in a Dream so many times with NO ONE making a comment about how he's building up a considerable amount of blot???????

Vargas Camp seems to suggest that using one's UM typically uses up a considerable amount of magic compared to a non-UM spell. (The boys felt it would be dangerous to cast UM without at least a sizable magestone.) This is not true of all UMs though; Kalim's Oasis Maker, for example, allows him to offer up a small amount of magic to produce a great amount of water. So let's say for argument's sake that Silver's UM is similar to Kalim's and does not require a ton of magic per use. (Edit: this detail is confirmed true in the recent update.)

But??? That still doesn't make a ton of sense???? Silver was in constant battles against Silver Owls while in Lilia's dream, meaning he is physically being chipped away at. No matter how physically fit, capable, or well-trained he is, Silver is only human and his stamina and perseverance has its limits. He also suffered immense emotional distress in Lilia's dream after realizing that he is the son of the man who killed Malleus's mother ON TOP of having doubts that he is worthy of Lilia's love AND fixating on how no matter how hard he tries, he can never truly "pay back" his father. I guess it can be argued that the pixies healed them on their trek (+ there was that one scene where Lilia and co. rest in a Silver Owls camp) and that Silver "got over" his feelings after Sebek shouted at him about how much Silver is loved... Even then, that's not really a good explanation??? Silver climbed up those daunting mountains surrounding Castle Blackscale--mountains which have oppressive magic that harms humans. This is POST-pixie encounter, so he'd still be walking in with damage from that, not to mention the blow of lightning magic he took from Maleanor???? I'd also think that while Sebek's pep talk (well, pep shout) helped clear Silver's head, it wouldn't invoke a sudden character change on the spot; Silver would no doubt still have lingering feelings and would need time to properly sort them out and reconcile with them. They haven't been addressed in full yet, at least not until Silver can like get some closure on his own terms, maybe by sitting down and talking with Lilia about everything they learned. (That's definitely a topic for post book 7 though.) Now think about how many times Silver is expected to use his UM. At minimum, he has already used it 4 times (to show up in Yuu's dream, then to hop into Sebek's dream, then Lilia's, then Idia's). In the most recent update, Silver has used it no less than an additional 4 times (to jump from Idia's dream to Epel's, then to Rook's, then to Vil's, then to presumably a Scarabia boy's which is where the next update will likely pick up). THAT'S ALREADY 8 TIMES????? And he has like 11 or 12 more dreams to visit, including having to jump back to Idia’s dream and then prep for fighting Malleus???? It's like 20 times Silver is expected to use his UM, with very little down time in between because... oh yeah, TWISTED WONDERLAND IS ABOUT TO HAVE ETERNAL NAP TIME IF THEY DON'T HURRY TF UP 🤡 That's not even mentioning the increased loads each time Silver casts his UM (since they're collecting students like Pokemon to gang up on Malleus). If previous UMs imply anything, more people should make it more difficult to pull off a spell. Ruggie had to use a magic-enhancing potion to control a whole statium, Cater is strained the more clones he creates at any given time. Jamil's hypnosis magic cast upon a group causes him to accumulate blot so much faster. Shouldn't this be a major concern for Silver??????? Should I be concerned for Silver????????

Don't get me wrong, I love that we're able to dream hop and see what each of the main cast characters are dreaming of, but 💦 I don't know if I should be worried or not about Silver's health???????? Because I could see why the devs would just hand wave it off in this instance (cuz how else are they going to travel to each dream and save the world? They're kind of on a time crunch here...), but at the same time I can see it going the other way and sort of breaking immersion?? Unless this is all intentional and they're going to jumpscare us with a Silver OB or him struggling against it later in book 7 💀 (I mean... the guy hasn't gotten his limited SSR for book 7 yet, so maybe it'll be related to this???)

Or is it just possible for him to break the limits of his magic since this is a dream...? We’ve seen other characters OB at will and be able to seemingly stay rational while in that form... but if that's the case, then why does Silver still feel tired and physically worn down in Lilia's dream after fighting so much? Why do they worry about taking too many hits and actually dying within the dreams? Can't he theoretically stay at "perfect" health after using his magic so much???

Does it not count as using “real” magic since they’re in a dream and therefore have much more flexibility in how they spellcast?? Or is it that it’s their dream!selves casting so it’s not real magic since it’s not their physical forms spellcasting…? Is blot accumulation slowed since Silver is technically sleeping and rest helps with healing from blot?? But then how does that impact their real bodies if at all?

I DON'T KNOW, I'M CONFUSED OTL

[nevesmose]

So I don't want to leap right into saying "please create fascist symbolism for me" but sure, feel free to give it a try if you'd like to!

There are definitely a lot of elements you could play around with. Like the Aberdeen city council logo recently had a "futuristic" redesign that feels quite dystopian to me whenever I see it...

Why are the leopards so skinny and oppressive looking now? Why is it purple? Where has the crown gone? To be honest you could redesign the city flag with the purple colour and simplified coat of arms elements and it'd end up looking the part...

Purple on grey/black with the simple blocky towers and the much more aggressive, jagged looking flory-counterflory pattern would give it a suitably unpleasant vibe imo

In this house we support Aberdeenshire Shortlisted Design B

🫡

Also I figured it out, when you see it moving Design E doesn't just look generically fascist but in particular it looks like something a monarchist Helghast faction would use in a Killzone game.

[burningcheese-merchant]

When Burning Spice was introduced a lot of people made comparison with Capsaicin, and even thought they were related. You have any thoughts on that?

I do, and you're all probably going to be very disappointed lol

Not only do I NOT vibe with the idea that they're related, I'm actually really annoyed that it's as popular as it is lol. It doesn't even make sense. Burning Spice was in prison for thousands of years; when, where and how did he have a kid? At what point in time did this occur? Capsaicin is a young man. A regular mortal, outside of his "Spice Overlord" thing. I ask you all again: when? Where? How? WHY? Has anyone ever actually thought this through?

"ThEy LoOk SiMiLaR" okay, and? So fucking what? Neither of them own the concept of "long hair" or "muscles" or "sharp teeth". Pitaya has those too, and he has an arguably more substantial connection to Capsaicin because they're actually from the same fucking area. Happenstance. Lots of characters in this game have similar attributes, that doesn't necessarily mean anything

"ThEy'Re BoTh SpIcY" Refer to point A. Do you all think all the nut-based cookies are related, too? That's the logic you might as well be operating on. Correlation is not causation

"Blah blah both jail" you know how many characters in this whack-ass phone game count as felons, bro? How many of them SHOULD count as felons lol? The Cookie Run universe might as well be one giant Alcatraz with all the shit these little affronts to God get up to every day, I ain't making them all each other's relatives because of it

They're the wrong ages for them to be family. Burning Spice was serving a life sentence since long before Capsaicin was even thought of, he literally got out after the guy was already a grown ass man. They're not even from the same fucking CONTINENT! Capsaicin has probably never even HEARD of Beast-Yeast! Even that little comic the CRK Twitter account posted makes fun of all this shit!!! The Wild Spices mistake Cap for Spice from behind, and then get confused when he turns around because THEY VERY CLEARLY DO NOT KNOW WHO HE IS AND HAVE NEVER SEEN HIM BEFORE! Wouldn't an army know if their general had a son, even if it was only mentioned in passing? Wouldn't THIS army have a vested interest in having their general's son around if he existed, and stop at nothing to bring him home should he vanish, to gain favor with Spice and because of how powerful Capsaicin is and how useful he could be to them?

I wouldn't be so bent out of shape about all this if it wasn't LITERALLY FUCKING EVERYWHERE!!! I cannot enjoy any content of Burning Spice OR Capsaicin without having to endure a fucking barrage of "hurr durr father and son" posts!!! I just want to ogle my hot, sexy, deliciously evil spice man BY HIM-FUCKING-SELF in peace, I never asked to have to hear the exact fucking same "hi son I came back with the milk" joke over and over and over again

I know I sound like a massive dick right now and I'm truly sorry. You are more than welcome to think of these two as related in some way if you wish. I am not your mother, nor your leader, nor your god, I'm just some cringe loser on the internet. Enjoy this game and its characters in whatever way you choose. I even actually like a good bit of the father/son art, a lot of it is cute and funny. I'm able and willing to say that with complete sincerity.

I just wish I didn't have to feel like it's being forced on me. That is one of the biggest issues I have with this fandom: how oppressive it often feels. You MUST ship this particular pairing, you MUST headcanon these characters as family, you MUST take this one-off joke that was clearly just a goddamn joke and preach it 24/7/365 like it's the gospel truth that Devsis themselves wrote on stone tablets and delivered from the top of Mount Sinai. And then when someone doesn't want to do that, everyone else descends upon them like a plague of fucking locusts. I actually saw a Dad Spice + Son Cap post on here with the person who made it saying something like "ok since everyone agrees that these two are family [...]" and I just got so fucking irritated. No, actually, not everyone agrees. Not everyone agrees on a lot of the fanon that's shoved down the entire community's throats on a regular basis. PLEASE stop acting like they do. I still remember when people would get flat-out harassed for not acting like Herb is Sea Fairy's son (old ass drama lol).

Say what you will about me, I'm just one person and you can block me or whatever dumb tags I use for my dumb shit. There is NOWHERE I can go to avoid this. Twitter? Plagued. Tumblr? Plagued. Even fucking reddit is on this nonsense (only in my personal opinion). But that's what I get for acknowledging Reddit in any capacity lol

I shall once again sincerely apologize for my harsh tone here, I am not attacking you personally or anyone who headcanons these two as relatives. I am just generally, profoundly frustrated and I need to get it out. I appreciate you taking the time to ask me an honest question, I hope you can forgive me for my painfully honest answer

[drdemonprince]

Your post about "transitioning to escape gender but then there's more gender" has been rotating furiously in my mind since I saw it. When I first realized I was trans at age 15, I identified as agender, but I knew I wanted to go on T and get top surgery so I decided it would be simpler to tell everyone I was a trans man and that just kind of became the truth. Now 10 years later I'm sorta starting to feel like I wanna actually be agender again, but the idea of an identity shift like that at my current age is terrifying and idek who I'd tell, or how I'd do it, and I don't think I wanna stop using he/him exclusively, and I have no idea why I'm telling *you* this other than that I'm scared to talk to anyone I know about it because it feels like somehow admitting that I was wrong about the gender I fought like hell to become, even though i don't really think that's the case I think my sense of self might just be continuously evolving... but I just wanna say you talking about having a gender shift like once every several years is helping me process this rn and feel like I'm not faking anything now AND wasn't faking anything before.

Dog i am right there with you. As a kid I always thought gender was bullshit, the coercive nature of it disgusted and scared me and I rebelled against it the best that I could. I loathed being assigned to any gender category, I never identified as a "girl", but I didn't really identify with any other category either. Puberty terrified me (and of course, it does most young people, but it felt like it would only more deeply entrench the category that I was assigned to in other people's minds, it made it more difficult to escape). I had trans friends as a teen but it did not occur to me to transition because there was really no end goal that I wanted to head toward, I just knew what I wanted to avoid and not experience. I coped mostly by degendering my body with a fairly androgynous style and way of presenting myself to the word and mannerisms, but also by starving myself which was not so great, and not sustainable. I considered transness for myself, even trying on a friend's binder and presenting masculinely at certain queer events, but it seemed to me at the time like just another way in which to obsess over gender, a foolish coercive socially constructed thing that i was trying to avoid.

In my 20s, I learned more about nonbinary people and figured that explained things pretty well. I was enamored with the transition journeys of some other trans people, largely trans women more than trans masculine ones (with some trans-effeminate faggot boy exceptions), but I still didn't want to take on all the expense and uncertainty and hassle of navigating the medical system for myself. I didn't think that the pursuit of being happy merited taking on so many risks or fiddling with myself so much. I saw it as an extravagance I didn't deserve, I guess, and I also couldn't locate a target outcome that seemed desirable enough for me. I was still dealing with an eating disorder and recovering from some trauma and didn't really think about my life in the long term. I guess I still don't, haha, whoops.

Eventually I came out as nonbinary, and nobody really gave a shit. There is a lot of useless, solidarity-breaking discourse that happens online about essentially who is "more" oppressed, binary trans people or nonbinary people, and a lot of that fight amounts to the two groups shouting about the ways in which they annoy one another without there being any cogent analysis of power and where oppression comes from (let alone how much those two categories overlap).

But I will say that being a they/them was far more difficult than being a trans guy socially and institutionally, because your identity is completely illegible to every system around you. "binary" trans people struggle under this too, but i have found there are some immense benefits to having a socially and institutionally legible target gender. nobody would fucking actually they/them me. not anyone. not even other trans people and queer people. there were no public gendered spaces for me. there were no spaces for me. there was no way to move through the medical system, professional life, and other public institutions as a nonbinary person. i was still just a cis woman in everyone's eyes. including the people who claimed to support me. and it was massively frustrating.

and so i think ultimately, i took my frustrations with not being at all able to escape coerced gendering as a nonbinary person and combined that with the affinity i do feel for queer men and the general sense of misery i was still experiencing in my life and decided what the hell, i'll round myself up to being a trans guy. i upped my T dose, i dressed more masculinely, i eventually got a super masculine hair cut that really squared off my jawline and got me gendered correctly, and i started more consciously inhabiting queer men's spaces.

and it was pretty dope. for a while. i felt the rush of having gotten away with something. when people effortlessly gendered as male i felt freed at last from the pressure to be a woman. i was no longer being coerced into being something that i was not. i had escaped the enforced category so much that people couldn't even see the history of that category being pushed onto me. there was relief.

but then. as always happens. people made little comments about my handshake being too weak for a man. the hypermasc dudes at the leather bar rolled their eyes at me and all the other effeminate dudes swanning around the bar. the people who picked me up off the apps or at the sauna would always let it slip, eventually, that they had a lot of experience with trans guys, or had most recently been dating all trans guys, and it would make me feel like a stock character to them, yet another category into which all kinds of assumptions had been projected. a type not a person. a few people said my haircut made me look like i was in the military or described me as actually masculine, which was equally jarring because it was so incorrect. people tried to affirm me by saying i was such a dude, i was such a man, i was such a fag, i was such a gay bro, pawing all over me leaving the mark of all their assumptions and oversimplifications behind. i had tried to run away from gender and there i was just BASTING all the time in everybody's goddamn assumptions about gender. trans people didn't talk about it any less than cis people did, they were just as fucking confining to be around.

it honestly feels really dirty. when people try to affirm your gender constantly and can't stop talking about it, when people look past you and see only your body, your history, or the role they have typecast you in, when people use your body as an outlet for their own gender or sexuality explorations, when they keep trying to measure every single facet of existence up into being masculine or being feminine or being toppy or bottomy or any other gendered type, it's claustrophobic.

as a trans man i tried playing this whole gender game and the second i started winning i began to feel even more disgusted with myself. it wasn't a victory or an escape, it was a capitulation. exploring with my identity and presentation has brought positive things into my life and my health has gotten better as a result, and i've made wonderful friends who, like me, are disaffected by this coercive gendering system. so i don't regret any of that. but trying to make myself legible under the existing gendered system was a fool's fucking errand. i wish i hadnt done it to myself and i wish i hadnt had it pushed onto me. to be clear, it was cissexist, binarist society that forced it onto me; even when other queer people coated me in their gendered assumptions that is obviously a byproduct of societal conditioning, and it's conditioning that ive reinforced in my own behavior and outlook toward others plenty of times too. we all do it, and we are all wronged by the existing coercive gender system.

i dont even care how i fucking identify anymore and i have no intention of changing pronouns again or anything, i'm so bored of it, i just actually want off this fucking thing. im not interested in trying to make others understand what i am anymore or in who i am even being simply categorizable, i dont want to obsess anymore over how i am perceived or to attempt engineer my appearance and mannerisms to broadcast an identity to anyone. i dont even want to fuck anybody right now at all because im so sick of how much that's a gender pantomime for people. i want off this fuckin ride man im so done.

it's kind of freeing, to hit this point of complete gender apathy, and i think it is a pretty common stage of identity development for a lot of queer people who have explored multiple identities and roles over time. there is no category that i actually am, or that anyone is, there are just the frameworks that society has given us to work with to understand ourselves, and the ways in which we flatten who we are to be able to make sense of the world using those frameworks. but who i actually am is so much more contextual and mutable than all that. i am a different person in the classroom than i am on the train platform than i am in the bedroom than i am cuddling on the couch than i am when i'm working out than i am when curled up on the floor crying than i am at a big furry convention. who i am continues to change as new people come in and out of my life and age and change and my body alters and as the weather turns. who fuckin knows man it's nothing and everything. i want to let it just be

[erabu-san]

You are literally French. What would you know about any of this, an issue and drama stirred up by anericans.

Blackwashing exists and is used by bigots that hate white people. Its used to erase the ethnicity of asians just because people dont think they are "poc enough" because of their pale skin. Its used to demonize people with pale skin because its becoming more and more the norm to view anyone with pale skin as evil. That anyone who is "too pale" isnt enough or a human being.

They arent real people, and their skintones are fine as is. You wouldnt go up to, for example an albino or mixed race black/poc person and tell them they arent "dark enough". They dont even need to be special like that to be pale. Some just are pale.

Whether you think there should be more characters that are dark or not is not the issue. Its that you think they wouldnt be/arent good enough as is with pale skin that shows how much of a bigot you are.

Blackwashing is not the progressive act you think it is. Its obvious that your only experience with it is through genshin drama. You obviously know nothing about how much red haired pale characters & asian ones are substituted with black characters. How characters are simply replaced in the name of "diversity". How this forced inclusivity and diversity is just bigots trying to "get revenge" on the white people they hate so much, and to tick off DEI boxes on their little bigoted checklist.

You tell me to educate myself but its actually YOU who needs to be educated.

Many are complaining about sumeru and natlan characters with names similar to gods in cultures of our world that are pale when their inspiration is dark skinned. Claiming they want representation and for it to be accurate, to reflect our world on a 1-1 scale.

Yet these same people will make xiao, zhongli, Ei, and many more asian characters darker " because asians can be dark skinned too". Yet so can mostly dark skinned races be pale.

So why cant you (gen) respect such characters, who are gods and divine beings based on a culture where pale is more beautiful, and gods of such cultures are pale?

There is hypocrisy in everything to do with blackwashing. Its okay when its done to pale characters because in real life black people have been oppressed? But these characters are not real, nor are they a reflection of our reality, as far as we have seen they dont even have racism in this fictional world.

It is one thing to explore a character like with the recent hatsune miku trend, atleast there most people arent going at each other's throats saying black miku is better than japanese miku(as far as i have seen)

Seriously how can you even begin to justify this. And who ever told you that dark skinned characters "scare white people" is an absolute fucking liar trying to justify their own bigotry towards white people.

No black washing IS just as disgusting as whitewashing. Neither should exist, and you shouldn't feed into the stupid circle jerk of bigotry that both of them are.

Aaaah that's what I like ! Yes ! Thank you for telling me your opinion, explaining what is wrong. I absolutely love to learn, and I prefer to read this long text calling me ignorant and explaining why that just a simple text of you saying you are annoyed by a fanart.

Thank you for telling me ! First yes I am french, and indeed my culture has more an european pov. But again, I also grow up as a minority "race" with my parents culture !🙏 in france, i don't look like a french. Well. Still I am aware that it doesn't remove anything from what I said

And I totally agree with you, some are just pale !! It just happens I draw Kinich black because I like it like this. Is Kinich true inspiration are actually pale ? Tell me more, I wish to learn !!

Tbh when you talk abt gods being pale is beautiful, I thought about Nahida. I did research when she were out and yes, I do agree, there is character who are fine as they are.

And because I live in France I also see "dark skin scare white" as a true fact. It happens and it is harmful. 🧍 not only in France tho, in country where pale skin is portrayed as beautiful, people who have tan skin are less represented even if it is the majority. I suppose the contrary happens too !!

"Character are not real" and yet you are annoyed, I guess it is the action of "blackwash" that make you mad, more than "a fictional character w diffent skin tone" tho! My opinion is fiction does affect real world, as do real life affects fiction, and this is something I won't debate on

"They don't have racism in this fictional world" sorry but it does in Sumeru. 🙏 about this one npc she is reject by forest and desert because of them being mixed, desert not being access to book and even Cyno said his scholarship was complicated because he is from desert

If you wish to continue, please send me DM with arguments. I don't know if I would change my mind of not drawing Kinich pale, but I am super interested about what you have to say !! 👍👍

[leftneb]

alr here's me yapping about the landoscar Detroit: Become Human AU @lyslsstuff and I have cooked up over the past week or so

(decided to make a full post about it bc a. I have many MANY thoughts about it and b. you people are clearly not normal about this either) (affectionately)

first off have another WIP (peep the blue blush and the lines on their faces I'm totally normal about it yesyes) I unironically had to hide their heads a couple times because the sheer homosexual glee on their faces was making me nauseous (this is how I know I've succeeded as an artist)

the main concept goes: oscar is an F1 driver, and lando is one of his android mechanics. unbenoknownst to the general public (and pretty much everyone except like. zak brown) is that oscar is also an android

androids are very much banned from f1

lando starts out as a normal android, just following his programming and minding his own business really. altough the au plays out after the android revolution androids are still mistreated, just in subtler ways. technically they're not owned by anyone (but they're only allowed to exist when employed) and there's no segregation in public (but there's no laws against it) and some people are vaguely accepting (guess what there's no hate crime or hate speech laws either)

basically I went with the game's commentary on capitalism and treatment of minorities and made it a lot more actual c: we're not oppressing you (but we're also not not oppressing you)

the real plot begins when lando (accidentally) finds out that oscar is an android, which both of them proceed to be completely normal and not disgustingly in love about for the rest of eternity

one of my favorite things about this au (and this was completely unplanned it sorta just happened on it's own) is that the car is basically the 3rd main character. the way I'd explain it is basically: rk800 connor in the game is able to reconstruct entire events (crimes in his case) by examining details and piecing it all together. both lando (being a mechanic) and oscar (actually pulling functions out of the thing) are intimately familiar with the car, like they KNOW it on a personal level pretty much, they can reconstruct every single thing that is happening mechanically by hearing the sound it's making alone

for oscar this is sort of unfortunate because he is suspiciously good at telling when something is wrong (way before anyone else can really). but it also makes both of them emotionally attached feel connected to their machines which I think would be a genuinely interesting aspect of having androids in motorsports

thought I had while writing that paragraph: since irl the cars are usually identified by their drivers' numbers ("car number 4" and such) it could be that oscar litterally just calls his car "81". like that's just it's name. very creative ik

for the enjoyers of the original game I'd add that oscar's deviancy arc (in the sense of which impulses he recieves that lead him to disobey his programming) is most similar to markus' while lando's is more akin to connor's

bonus details that I can't really fit in a paragraph but want to add anyway:

android movements being inhumanly smooth conveniently mirrors oscar's irl driving style (minimal movement)

oscar normally has his pain receptors on despite being able to disable them. something about wanting to feel human (refuses to turn them off after crashes he feels were his fault despite mark scolding him about it)

yk the thing where both of these idiots are always dressed for opposite weather? yeah here it actually makes sense they were just programmed that way

I have no idea where lando's name comes from androids don't have names by default. they just get called "it" for the most part except oscar sometimes slips up and calls lando by his given name (that sounds very trans when I put it like that) which everyone else collectively goes "who the FUCK is lando" at

android transgenderism

I will not elaborate on that (note: I am trans. I will project this)

fun fact the piece that started it all ^^ was quite litterally just me seeing a picture of lando and going "dbh vibes" despite my knowledge of the game consisting of maybe half a playthrough I kinda-watched in 2021 (tubbo played it on stream lmao). it's safe to say that I may have hyperfixated on it a little tiny bit taking into account the 10 hours of playthrough I've watched and 2283 words of google doc we've written since that fateful day. whoopsies

also want to conclude this by saying that I purposefully didn't give too much away about the AU plot-wise because the hypothetical fic that hypothetically may come into existance at some point is hypothetically still a ways away and I don't want to spoil it too hard. consider this a director's commentary if you will

lmk if you wanna be added to the tag list for posts related to this au btw!!! I absolutely love hearing people's thoughts on it (though I am gonna be a bit busy in the coming weeks)

tag list (more people asked me to talk about this than I anticipated soz if I didn't respond directly I hope this makes up for it) @roosterhouse @wisteriagoesvroom @kpiastri @kingkestrel

[thyfleshc0nsumed]

hey crazy question, since you said there is no evil what would you call hitler evil? trump? mussolini? genghis khan? jeffrey dahmer? jeffrey epstein? KKK members? IDF? and if they're evil then i guess you're telling me child rapists are the only ones that shouldn't be called evil? why is that?

I'm gonna ignore your bad faith misreading of my ideas and your attempt to insinuate I am a child abuser and answer your first question for other ppls sake, cuz I think it is a reasonable thing ppl might be grappling with.

In a word, no.

In a few more words, I think the question fails to properly interrogate what I mean when I refer to evil. 'Evil' is a component of a moral framework, and I feel that moral frameworks are by and large shallow and not very useful in furthering for understandings of the world around us, or very conducive to creating material change, from an individual scale to a societal scale.

The central idea I put forward in that post is that it is not some grand moral badness that enables violence and abuse, but rather systems of power. All of your examples speak to this. You mention the wealthy, political leaders, a state backed by a global superpower, and a group that was comprised of people with systemic power over their victims.

Viewing them merely as "evil" is frankly uncurious and in some ways, cyclical and thought terminating. It begs the question: "they're bad because they're bad because they're bad."

We have NO disagreement in the fact that what those people do or did have produced violence and harm, many on a scale which is difficult to fully comprehend the magnitude of. It is equally difficult to understand even how one could act with such cruelty towards fellow human beings. But just because it is difficult to understand does not mean it is impossible. They didn't do those things because they were born with some kind of evil gene or soul.

They, like you and I, were created by the context of the world around them. If Adolf Hitler died as a child, would Germany have been rid of its antisemitism or have lost its imperial ambitions? Would war have been averted? Certainly not. There were specific, relatively measurable conditions which allowed fascism to flower. If not him, someone else would have helmed that movement.

If Adolf Hitler were born in another place and time, he would not be Adolf Hitler in any meaningful sense. A person is more or less a sum of their environment. People cannot exist outside the context that they do in fact exist in.

And so to then declare someone as 'evil' amounts to saying just about nothing. It's zero sum. If people do harm simply because they are evil, then what can be done? Create a list of them and then systematically exterminate them?

Many people have twisted my words and claimed that what I am saying is that we should expose our bellies and allow bigots to gut us, or that I equivocate violence against oppressors and violence against the oppressed. This is categorically untrue. When violence is brought against you, violent response can be prudent.

But what happens after the relations of power have been altered? When the abuser or oppressor no longer has the power to harm you? Is there reason to harm them besides to punish or sate a desire for revenge? If they no longer have the means to do 'evil,' then what purpose does violence against them serve besides for the sake of our own bloodlust?

You will not see me shed a tear for Israeli settlers killed by opposition forces, or for abusers killed by a victim defending themself because those relations of power are still in place. Settlers can leave, soldiers can dodge the draft, and abusers can stop abusing.

But if they settle, kill, and abuse because they are 'evil,' then what choice did they have to begin with? And what can be done to stop colonialism, state violence, and abuse in the future? Are evil people just going to stop being born?

The framework of evil adds nothing, gives no solutions, and hinders progress by giving us amnesty for not looking at our own relationship to power structures. But a materialist, analytical framework provides us tools to deconstruct those structures and hopefully move beyond them.

[agatharkn3ss]

The meaning of the Macbeth witches

As I continue raking the episodes for all the cool hidden messages, let's address the painting that Agatha has in her living room and, in her Agnes O'Connor delusion, she thought it was a one-way-mirror.

By now lots of people have identified the painting to be "Macbeth and the three witches" by Francesco Zuccarelli, based on William Shakespeare’s play “Macbeth”. I think it provides a fantastic insight into the characters and the direction of the show. Long post, but worth it!

(I am using lots of sources but not referencing them, because it would make this post a lot longer. Hope that's ok!)

The Three Witches (aka Weird Sisters, Weyward Sisters or Wayward Sisters) serve their mistress Hecate (nod to our Triple Goddess). They reveal to Macbeth his prophecy, which will eventually lead to his demise, and they hold a striking resemblance to the three Fates of classical mythology. The witches generally symbolize the supernatural in Macbeth and they call into question the nature of free will.

Why include this painting at all? There can be multiple meanings but I think the most obvious reason would be to continue the feminist theme of how witches/women are portrayed and therefore mistreated – highlighting the tendency to marginalize and discriminate women who uphold their individuality.

 In the painting the three witches are shown as repulsive and ugly, with one of them holding a stick with a snake wrapped around it. And in the play they represent pure evil, as they drive a “noble and heroic man” into a power-craving ruthlessness which induces him to betray his friends and nation. However, people start to catch on that the treatment of the witches reflects the oppression and misogynistic values women experienced in the past.

We could probably draw some parallels with our witches. Lilia is driven out of every village she passes through for accurately predicting tragedy. Jen is called an inconvenient woman and bound – likely because of being a successful midwife. Agatha is being thought of as the evil, “most infamous” witch-killer. Lilia even goes as far as saying that Agatha is the very reason why those stereotypes even exist. But as the layers peel off, we get to see that she is a much more complex persona than just your “black” or “white” character. It is becoming clear that both Agatha and Lilia have shared a huge amount of prejudice and backlash just because of their unique abilities – not only because they can’t control them, but also because they are different. Lilia hates this discrimination and eventually hides from it like a “coward” (as Agatha noted), even though she might enjoy the things that make her a witch (like flying on brooms), while Agatha embraces the negative perception and uses it to her advantage, to create this defence wall around her and make people fear her. In their different ways, they both end up being slaves to those stereotypes.

I think there is also a bit of foreshadowing here, because it is interesting to set up this narrative and then introduce the character of Teen aka Billy Maximoff – the boy who (as we saw in Wandavision) was named by papa Vision specifically in honour of none other than William Shakespear!

Shakespear is not only the author of Macbeth, but has also been widely criticised for his treatment of women characters in his plays – they are shown to be emotionally weak and inferior to men. Even women in power are portrayed by him as manipulative, not to be trusted and with questionable morals (sounds familiar?). There are so many papers that explore this, but I think this one illustrates is best:

“In Ancient Greece, Hecate was a Goddess, who used to bless people with good luck, health, wisdom and victory. People often used to put a statue of her at crossroads or entrance-ways to scare the evil spirits. In other words, she was a goddess of ‘positive energy’. (...) In Macbeth, Shakespeare too presents Hecate as leader of the negative force who hatches a plan with the three weird sisters to misguide Macbeth towards a deadly end by keeping him in illusion. (...) Doing so, he denounces her godliness and demeans her stature by using the male centric religious perspective that causes much harm to women’s body and mind across time and space.”

While I don’t at all want to suggest that Teen is in any way set up as a misogynist, there is still that moral superiority complex - we see a glimpse of it in episode 5 when he essentially says he is better than them: “So that’s what it means to be a witch? Killing people to serve your own agenda? No, not for me.” Then of course he completely contradicts that in the next moment, when he literally buries the witches in the ground.

He seems to completely ignore the fact that it was him who wanted the Witches Road in the first place. The initial reaction of every single witch in the coven was always the same: “The Road will kill you.”, “The Road is a death wish”, “It’s a dead end. Literally”. Billy CHOSE to ignore this and actively pressured each of the witches to join. He needed them to serve HIS own agenda, knowing fully well that some of them could die. I hope he will soon realise that he is no different than the rest.

We can immediately see how he really is “so much like his mother” who chose to trap the Westview citizens, then when they got their identities back and told her about their torment, she literally tried to gaslight them by telling them they were fine and “at peace”. Then had the cheek to excuse her actions and show her superiority to Agatha by showing her the bodies of her original coven saying “You see the difference between you and me is that you did this on purpose” – the irony being of course that Agatha clearly couldn’t control her powers in that moment, so I doubt this was on purpose - same in Alice’s case

 (sidenote: I think the reason Wanda thought that, was because she entered her mind and saw that Agatha probably blamed herself for it, maybe even believed that if she tried a bit harder, she would’ve been able to control it).

So…. Why use that painting in the interrogation scene? I’m sure there are many possible hidden meanings, but my interpretation is that in that moment Agatha/Agnes are playing exactly to take advantage of the stereotypes. Billy claims to know who she is. But really, he just knows those stories that she allows people to believe. He calls her out for not having “respect of her peers” or a “fulfilling home life” – as if that is what every “respectable” woman should want. Instead of feeling embarrassed, she immediately latches onto that and reminds him that this is exactly what makes her dangerous. “Hey, you know those three ugly witches? They brought Macbeth down just with their words!”. I am sure there could be further meanings if you really look deep into it. Could Teen be interpreted as Macbeth himself, surrounded by witches and relying on their help?

Another element here is of course Rio, standing on the other side of the “mirror”. The painting itself has allusions to death: the witch in white is often compared to a ghost and “the dark sky above the mountains is a metaphorical representation of death lurking around the king, around Macbeth, around every man confronted with his own destiny.” Yet again, we might be getting another hint as to Rio’s true identity (let’s face it – is there anyone left by now who doesn’t think she’s Lady Death?)

It is not entirely clear where Rio is at this point (she can’t be standing behind a painting?) and Billy doesn’t acknowledge her presence – he likely hasn’t even realised Rio intervened when Agatha kicked him to the floor. At one point he asked why she was looking at that painting (although, he might have said it as a misdirection, to bring her to reality). So maybe in this “Agnes of Westview” show, Rio really is equal to a ghost, hiding in plain sight and lurking through a window of Agatha’s mind. She is the only one who appears to actually SEE what Agatha is seeing (“Is this really how you see yourself?”), even goes as far as provide her with more “evidence” (fake victim/flower photos). She seems to know Agatha’s thoughts on the case even before she voices them – sometimes it looks as though she’s actually putting those thoughts in her head (what was that about the three witches defying the concept of free will?...) . Finally – Rio times it to perfection when she shows up at Agatha’s doorstep, (mis)quoting Pride and Prejudice and clearly aware of the sad scene Agatha had just experienced. So maybe Agatha is the Macbeth of the story? Is she destined for self-destruction?

I have yet to form my theory on Rio' involvement and her intentions. But I can’t help but think that her appearance is not quite as it seems – that we are “looking at it the wrong way” - is it a painting or a mirror?

To finish this off (phew!), I particularly like this one analysis of the Macbeth painting that points out the different sublime elements – the repulsive witches, the grandeur of nature and the loneliness of the hero. I think it fits Agatha's position as it concludes:

This theory of the sublime opposes the sublime with beauty as two exclusive concepts (like light with darkness) while recognising that both can provide pleasure. Sublimity may evoke horror, but the knowledge that the perception is a fiction can be pleasureful.

Edit: I have also spotted the clock in that scene states 3.33. There are more nods in the show to number 3 and Shakespeare uses the symbolism of trinity throughout the Macbeth play as an idea that tragedy/death comes in threes (3 witches, 3 apparitions, 3 murders etc.). So I feel there is some foreshadowing here as well (e.g. Agatha's wearing a jersey with no3 in the same episode that Alice dies).

Witch 1: Thrice the brinded cat hath mewed. Witch 2: Thrice and once the hedgepig whined. Witch 3: Harpier cries “’Tis time, ‘tis time.”

[aranock]

I'm tired.

Just sort of in general I am exhausted. I know I put on a brave face a lot, but the hate does get to me. The constant unceasing hatred both offline and online gets to me. I'm human idk what to say. Been thinking a lot about the Bilbo quote, I might be paraphrasing, "I feel like too little butter spread across too much toast."

It's pride month, I should be feeling happy right? I convocated finally after a brutal long degree I should be feeling happy right? I like how my body looks for the first time in my life shouldn't I feel happy?

And I know that's not helpful, that feelings are not a should thing. And yet I feel it anyway :/. Not that I do not feel happy, I would say on average I am better than I have been at any other point in my life. But it does get to me.

I was invited to dinner with a former family member, a blood relative that breached every boundary I placed and even went so far as to accost me in a public space. It's hard watching someone lose all love for you the more you become yourself. Being told I'm an embarrassment to my parents by creeps online stings a lot more now that I had a blood relative say it to my face while aggressively yanking my jacket so I couldn't get away. I know its a lie, I know that this person saying that hurt my parents as much as it did me. Alas, anxiety rarely responds to facts or evidence.

Everytime it feels like I'm fine and over it; this person manages to weasel their way around boundaries to fuck up my mental health for a week. And the thing about chronic illnesses like mine is they flare up quite horrendously when you get stressed and anxious. Anxiety means waking up to acid burnt throat from reflux.

It makes my voice dysphoric all day.

I think deep down one of my greatest fears is that I am unlovable, that everyone around me secretly hates me and is just waiting for the excuse to finally be rid of interacting with me. I am terrified that I am a burden. Mortified by the false belief that I am broken.

Despite how horrific my childhood adolescence and some of my early adulthood were, my family was at least a safe place. I recognize that I was privileged to have that. With that said I think the reason this whole thing has rocked me so much is that it violated that one last place I felt safe. It has made me doubt the love of those I never thought I would.

Sometimes transphobia feels like drowning, and if you try to swim for air everyone decides to shove you further down cause actually it's proof you are faking needing breath.

I text someone anytime I go run errands, just to make sure someone knows. Had too many experiences of hate. I get anxious when I go to get groceries; will this be the time I get hit by a vehicle driven by a far right transphobe, am I going to get called a slur again, will the store staff get suspicious of me and search through all my groceries to make sure I actually paid for it. But please, tell me how I don't know what its like to be oppressed. When men sexually harass, catcall, creepily hit on, follow me around clearly I am not at all experiencing sexism. Obviously the real worst thing in the world is that women "cancel" people on the internet, and trans people exist. Did they think sending me hateful articles would suddenly make me go "oh yes clearly its all in my head, please genocide my community, I stand for nothing and have the moral backbone of a slug."

I don't really know why I'm writing this, I dont usually feel or desire to express something like this publicly. I will probably delete it later. Maybe I disappear into writing cause its easier to deal with the feelings that way. That at least then someone gets something out of my pain. That maybe it helps to condense emotional mountains to the mole hills of short strokes of a pen or presses of a key. To let them explode outward in a flurry of thoughts and words that others look at and say "I too have felt this, you are not alone, you are not wrong for feeling this way."

Anything to take the weight of it all off my chest for a second.

Because I am tired.

I'm exhausted really.

I don't want to be brave or strong or resilient. It's tiring to bear the weight of that and a billion projections. Atlas does not bear the heavens upon his shoulders because he is strong or brave. He bears it because he has no other choice. Because people put it on him.

I just want to exist; that is apparently too much to ask for as a trans woman.

If you are concerned, please don't worry I'll be fine, I was fine every other time after all. This too shall pass. But right now it hurts.

And I have had my fill of hurt for many lifetimes.

[diabolicalworldwriter]

Jesus, I just got to the point in Words of Radiance where Kal is in prison and Dalinar basically says "You're not going to end racism by being radical and acting upset about it. You can't just expect us to treat you like an equal because you're not one. Play nice and maybe the racists will grow to respect you"

I.

Buddy what the fuck

In general I think I've found that I'm... Not as fond of Dalinar as I used to be. Don't get me wrong, he does some great things and he's constantly trying to improve and I appreciate that. Flawed characters make stories interesting and I think Brandon does a fantastic job of writing him. However, he is overly strict and judgemental (Still not forgiving him for hating on Adolin for trying to express himself a bit more through style in ROW; let my boy dress up a bit if he wants), he struggles to accept other ways of doing things (we could look to Adolin again, being "too friendly" with those he commands and Dalinar going "noooo they might respect you less if they think you see them as an equal individual"), and while he talks about how he wants to change how everything works, if someone tries to defy convention in a way he doesn't approve of he shuts them down. (Kaladin pointing out very fair issues with how dark eyes are punished severely and light eyes get away with everything only to be talked down at until he shut up and fell in line, for example.) He wants change and has power to bring it about but won't do anything too radical for it, I guess, and that frustrates me. He tends to support systems as long as they work for his own goals, even if they're still exploitative and deeply unjust, while also complaining that everyone else is being exploitative and unjust. I dislike that he acts like he's doing Kaladin such a favor by treating him as almost an equal. "I'm sticking my neck out by treating you like a human, act civil and don't try to speak too loudly about the injustices yet, you might make the others uncomfortable." Dalinar isn't like other light eyes, he's so quirky and different and sometimes acts a bit less classist and racist!!! Aren't we lucky!! Idk maybe I'm stating my point a bit too strongly but damn. He's giving "yeah I'm a stubborn old man but really I'm quite progressive, I don't even go out of my way to hate crime people"

Words of Radiance, while I enjoy it, is rather difficult to get through because it's just so many main characters who I generally appreciate being awful to/supporting or ignoring awful behavior towards Kaladin and if he reacts they're like ":0000 how dare he attack first" (I appreciate Zahel chewing out Adolin for antagonizing and then fighting Kal in shardplate because goddamn Adolin I love you but that sucked.)

I'm finding Elhokar a lot more unlikeable on this reread as well. He's meant to be unlikeable of course, so good job on that, but Jesus he can be the worst. Honestly standing beside my past thoughts that what Moash did wrong was not in turning on the system that oppresses him and all the dark eyes, but just that he knowingly hurt Kaladin and other people who cared about him repeatedly and severely to do so.

I'm on board with killing horrible leaders (especially if it seems the only way to remove them and stop them from causing harm: people shouldn't have to suffer and die as part of a leader's learning curve and character growth, and going "they're working on it" when people are actively suffering is garbage. I'm still sad at Elhokar's death but I'm not sad that he's no longer king) but I draw the line at abusing and killing one's friends and I am just hoping he comes to terms with what he has done wrong and improves in book five.

Anyways that was long and scattered I'm sorry lmao you should have heard my rant to my poor cousin, I was rambling for like half an hour.

[ghostflowerhotpotch]

Miles' Drawings Compilation

Sure you don't, champ?

Okay, this will be less of an analysis, and more of a collection of frames showing the drawings of Miles; I will also take notes of how many times someone appears, appearance and other details.

Let's dive in!

For this, I would looking for frames on 3 times on the movie; his sketchbook at the beginning, the wall on the subway, and his sketchbook again in Gwen's hands this time around.

We start with Miles drawing on this sketchbook.

Okay, while looking for frames I realized that some pages weren't completely show or were just being flipped, I captured as much as I could, but again, I am not doing this in any professional fashion, just pressing pause a bunch of times at half speed.

Complete Pages

First Page we see, Gwen is front and centre in a page solely dedicated to her.

For the appearance of this shot, I am pretty sure this is based on Gwen going down the portal, the last time he saw her.

Gwen appearances: 1

Gwen is the taking most of the page, but Aaron is here too, alive and looking just like another dude, as he remembers him.

There is some lettering around in the other pages, tho is hard to see.

We have one mysterious person that is mostly being obscured by Miles's head, so it will go as undefined character.

Some ketches of a street.

Gwen appearances: 2

Undefined character: 1

Aaron appearances: 1

Landscapes: 1

Lettering: 2

Okay! At first appearance, Gwen is only taking a quarter of the page; we also have Noir's first appearance, and Miles doing some Lettering, and finally some light doodles close to the spine.

Gwen appearances: 3

Undefined character: 1

Aaron appearances: 1

Landscapes: 1

Noir: 1

Lettering: 3

Doodles: 1

Okay! This entire a mostly Gwen only page, there is some words there but I think that would be more calligraphy than lettering, but would count it as lettering to not have too many numbers to keep track of.

And to give some chance to other things to score points.

Gwen appearances: 4

Undefined character: 1

Aaron appearances: 1

Landscapes: 1

Noir: 1

Lettering: 5

Doodles: 2

Once more Gwen is the biggest thing on the screen, but we have more people this time around! Thought Rio and Jeff some to be just sketches with lineart while he is putting full color to Gwen. Another point for lettering and doodle, which also, isn't that such an adorable little alien?

Gwen appearances: 5

Undefined character: 1

Aaron appearances: 1

Landscapes: 1

Noir: 1

Lettering: 3

Doodles: 3

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Once again Gwen is the bigger piece, but is also Peter's first appearance! I wonder how he would feel knowing it took this long for him to show up here.

Gwen appearances: 6

Undefined character: 1

Aaron appearances: 1

Landscapes: 2

Noir: 1

Lettering: 3

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 1

Double whammy this time around, Gwen appears big on the top corner, but also on the other page, apparently dancing. We also have a small hooded figure that I think may be Miles himself but I am not sure, and 2 people who I can't be sure who they are, so I will have those last three as Undefined characters, and finally, some more landscapes.

Gwen appearances: 8

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 1

Landscapes: 3

Noir: 1

Lettering: 4

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 1

Gwen being at the top of the page is not surprising at this rate, but I had also realized now that until this point, every drawing Miles has been actively working on has been Gwen's, except for the second page. I may add the total number at the end of this post because I am already counting a lot of things already.

Some lettering and Landscapes are here as well.

Gwen appearances: 9

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 1

Landscapes: 5

Noir: 1

Lettering: 5

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 1

Not only Aaron comes back, with Miles writing "Rest in Power," on it, I found this detail interesting because this phrase is also used a lot for people who struggled with systematic oppression; which there is a big chance was Aaron's case.

In the comics, Aaron and Jeff were criminals initially, with Jeff reforming once he became a father. We aren't sure what exactly is Jeff and Aaron's backstory in this universe; but I wouldn't discard the possibility that it was the same; with Aaron feeling he may had no other option not just because he already started this path, but because he couldn't get out due to circumstances.

Aside of this, we have another two drawings of Gwen.

We also have a drawing of Miles fighting against Dr. Oct, I wonder if this is suppose to represent the battle at the collider, or a new fight he may had with her.

Gwen appearances: 10

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 2

Landscapes: 5

Noir: 1

Lettering: 6

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 1

Miles: 1

Gwen is taking most of the page in this one, but we also have Peni's first appearance alongside her first robot. Also, on top of Gwen it says a small note of "Buy more Red!"

Gwen appearances: 11

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 2

Landscapes: 5

Noir: 1

Lettering: 6

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 1

Miles: 1

Peni and SP//dr: 1

And Noir is back! You know, considering he was the second one to appear, and the first to reappear, I wonder if Miles liked Noir that much, or maybe he is going it as art study of some sorts, since he is quite literally void of color.

Gren Goblin Appears! I didn't even register this before, I guess it does leave you with an impression.

Gwen appearances: 12

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 2

Landscapes: 5

Noir: 2

Lettering: 6

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 1

Miles: 1

Peni and SP//dr: 1

Green Goblin: 1

(FINALLY! This page goes on so quickly it took me multiple times to get it, jeez if anybody has a better idea of how to capture frames, please tell me in an ask or something please.)

Okay! So multiple people this time around, we can see Gwen a couple of times (because of course,) Noir is back (and I think my theory of this being black and white study is becoming stronger,) and on the other page we can see that Peter B is back again. Some equations as well, perhaps he needed to do it on the fly? Seems off to use his sketch book for this but oh well.

Gwen appearances: 14

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 2

Landscapes: 5

Noir: 3

Lettering: 7

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 2

Miles: 1

Peni and SP//dr: 1

Green Goblin: 1

The following pages were the ones I couldn't get complete because they were obscured when full on display, or there was never a chance on that shot to seeing the entire page.

Half Pages

On this one, we see this is the top part of page three, which is another Gwen drawing, surprise surprise. This means now she went for being in a quarter of the page to taking half the page.

Gwen appearances: 15

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 2

Landscapes: 5

Noir: 3

Lettering: 7

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 2

Miles: 1

Peni and SP//dr: 1

Green Goblin: 1

This one was hard to get, but we can see that before his hand got on top of the drawing, there was a doodle not just of Aaron, but Aaron as the Prowler!

Gwen appearances: 15

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 3

Landscapes: 5

Noir: 3

Lettering: 7

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 2

Miles: 1

Peni and SP//dr: 1

Green Goblin: 1

And finally, of course our final doodle of this sequence would be a big, beautiful close up of Gwen. Honestly his memory is impressive.

Gwen appearances: 16

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 3

Landscapes: 5

Noir: 3

Lettering: 7

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 2

Miles: 1

Peni and SP//dr: 1

Green Goblin: 1

With that, we go to the next part, the wall!

Mural

Since this one Miles just adding more drawings and such, there is really one frame to analyze. I could in theory talk about who he draws first and in which order, but I decided not to in hopes I can include all drawings in one post without hitting the limit of pics.

Is a big difficult to see everything, specially if seem in one go, so I did a breakdown of each character here.

The wall is interesting because unlike the Notebook, everyone except Aaron appears an equal amount of times, while Aaron only appears 2 times instead of 3, I found interesting how Miles drawn him both as the uncle he remembered, and the Prowler. I think even if he was technically a bad guy, Miles preferred to remember his uncle for the enterity of who he was, the good at the bad.

Also, front at centre we have Gwen, Aaron and Peter for the most part, which were also important key players last movie.

And I just notice, but this is the first time Ham appears in Miles's drawings! He is also the last one; huh, maybe not too much into cartoony art style?

Gwen appearances: 19

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 5

Landscapes: 5

Noir: 6

Lettering: 7

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 5

Miles: 1

Peni and SP//dr: 4

Green Goblin: 1

Ham: 3

Miles Notebook in Gwen's Hands.

. . .

I wasn't sure if they were going to show different drawings when Gwen had the books in her hands, I thought it was worth taking a look in case something was different, but it would make sense to just use the ones they already showcased.

What I did not expect, was to catch a continuity error.

Notice it yet? The page on the left actually had those exact same drawings on a right page earlier, in fact that page was suppose to come after the page on the right,

This is not really the first continuity error I had caught, I thought of doing a post about it, but with the news of the overworked animators I felt almost like an insult point out the mistakes when they were already working overtime to finish this movie. Perhaps at one point in the future when things had calmed down.

And if the last paragraph didn't made it clear enough: I don't want to hear anything against the animators for any possible mistakes I may point out or not in the future, I had dealt with far bigger bullshit than this and all things consider the people working on this movie deserve an award for multiple reasons.

With that out of the way, I came to see that actually, Ham DOES appear in the notebook! Miles shoulders made him difficult to see him as well as the explosion, but here he is!

Gwen appearances: 19

Undefined character: 4

Aaron appearances: 5

Landscapes: 5

Noir: 6

Lettering: 7

Doodles: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Peter: 5

Miles: 1

Peni and SP//dr: 4

Green Goblin: 1

Ham: 4

And here we have the only drawings that didn't appear before, which is of course, another big one with Gwen on it.

Also, we had seen Miles do some lettering, but, is it just me or this is the first time he has done it with her name?

On the other page we have a bus ticket, that upon closer inspection, is the Hudson Valley ticket from the last movie! This one in particular seems to be going TO Brooklyn, which means this is the ticket he had for when he, Gwen and Peter were coming back. No wonder he keep that one!

There is also a last mysterious person I have no idea who may be, I think maybe Genki? I don't remember his hair being that long but maybe it was like that at point? Will be put as a mysterious person in the final tally.

Final countdown.

Okay! The numbers may be a bit off, and I guess one could argue how many things could count as doodles/lettering, but the results seems to be this!

Gwen: 20

Lettering: 9

Noir: 6

Aaron: 5

Peter: 5

Undefined character: 5

Landscapes: 5

Doodles: 4

Peni and SP//dr: 4

Ham: 4

Rio: 1

Jeff: 1

Miles: 1

Green Goblin: 1

Miles's parents tied up with Green Goblin in appearances, which is kind of funny, but I guess he doesn't spend that much time with his parents, and he has them always in his corner so is not like he misses them like the rest. Green Goblin was probably because it could be interesting to draw.

Then we have Ham and Peni on the lower end of characters that appear, this makes sense since they didn't interact that much with Miles inthe last movie.

Landscape, Doodles and Undefined Characters come after it on the numbers, but I don't think there is much to talk about those.

Peter and Aaron being tied isn't that surprising all things consider, what it is surprised is that Noir of all people appeared more than them; I insist it can be explained by Miles trying to do black and white drawings.

Lettering is the second thing that appears the most, this number can varied depending if you lump together Grafitti style with Caligraphy or not, or even on the fact that there were some words that I didn't count for this. I think is safe to say the number would still be high one way or another.

But nothing is topping Gwen, who appears AT LEAST, 20 times in Miles's drawings.

Wow.

And Gwen is still the one who won the poll in who has crushing harder, and the worst part is that even with this number she winning makes sense.

They are both so stupid for each other, I love it.

Well, this post was more work than I expected, but it was a lot of fun either way, and this pics will be useful for references later.

I encourage people to reblog this post specially since I believe regardless if you ship Ghostflower or not, this information can come handy for anyone interested in the contents of the notebook or for fic reasons.

Thanks for reading and stay awesome!