#i have several more drafts but i haven't had the time to finish them ... maybe someday

[retquits]

Hi! Where can I read/find the Hayden and Monroe fic? I love them sm

it's on ao3! it's called fleeting touch, because the premise is about the little fleeting moments of falling in love, and the theme is ... well, touch 💛

i posted it back in september but was just too shy to say anything here (๑﹏๑)💦 but i've been gaining confidence by posting monroe more often! here's a snippet:

[jojo-schmo]

hi jojo! im just wondering but ive been wanting to make a comic for a little while but im not too sure where to start 😅. i really love your style of art and your forgotten land roleswap, and i was wondering if you had any tips for beginners?

Hello, hello! Thank you for enjoying my Forgotten Land Roleswap comic, it means a lot! <3

I'm very honored that people have been asking me for tips and advice. All of this is coming from a hobbyist who draws these comics purely for fun outside of my regular day job. Some of my methods would probably deal psychic damage to a professional, LOL. But I'm more than happy to share some things I've personally learned! :)

First of all, the book, "Understanding Comics" by Scott McCloud ROCKS. It literally gave me a new dimension to understand the medium of comics and how it presents ideas and emotions to readers! And I haven't even had the chance to finish it all the way! I'm very happy I own a copy and I recommend having one of your own if you can, but it's archived here if you want to read it :D

I also like analyzing other comics and thinking about how they get information across to me as a reader. It's helped me learn more effective ways to visually tell a story, like what to include in a frame, how zooming in or out affects the feeling from the panel, maybe building a scene by focusing on other stuff if someone is talking a lot... etc.

ANYWAYS-! Some other tips I've learned through my personal experience-

I had to overcome a lot of negative self-talk in order to tackle a huge comic project like this and stay committed. I was a pretty severe self-deprecator for most of my life so far, and getting help has allowed me to catch myself when I'm slipping back into those habits, look in the mirror, and go, "NO, JOJO! You pour your heart into what you make and that is a wonderful thing! You are appreciated and loved and you deserve to have fun making something you are passionate about!!" Some examples of the negative self-talk I catch myself in....

"I'm a noob at writing and making a story interesting... What's the point of even trying?"

When it comes to starting a project, whether it's 2 pages or 2000 pages, is to just jump in and start! It's okay to be a little insecure or nervous about your technical art skills, writing skills, etc... But writing a "bad" scene is better than no scene- because you can always edit a "bad" scene down the line, but what can you do with nothing? Nothing!! I also put "bad" in quotation marks because I am trying to use that term less, and instead call them "early drafts." or "works in progress."

The first Roleswap scene I fleshed-out was the first Bandee boss fight, in May 2022. I made this drawing on an impulse, getting my ideas down on the page without thinking about the technical stuff like comic panel borders. I consider it like a "pilot episode" almost, haha. The final project is going to be very different from how things play out here. But it got me interested in the concept and excited to see where I could take it, and I made the decision to commit to an entire game plot's worth of AU comics!!

Also, what's the point in trying you ask? The point is to have fun! Making a fan comic in my free time means I don't have restrictions like deadlines, nobody's telling me what I can and can't write, and I can make the story as long or as short as I want! I have full control, which means the world I'm writing is all mine to create! Yes, with a fan comic there is a pre-established world with existing characters. But a universe like Kirby has enough open-ended concepts for people to take basic concepts in the world and take them to whole new levels! I think that's why there are so many amazing fan interpretations of Kirby characters and OCs. The rules are so vague, you can just make up your own a lot of the time!! And it's a wonderful exercise to learn skills for someday building an original world with all original characters from scratch! Magical!!!

"I'm not good enough to make a comic. I don't understand perspective or color and other stuff. Anything I make will look bad.

I once read a two panel comic on here. I can't find it anymore but I remember most of it. First panel showed the artist looking at what they're drawing on their tablet, looking defeated and sad. "Man, I don't even know how to draw this....."The next panel was like them smiling and shrugging, I think rainbows and sparkles were coming out of their tablet, ".....I GUESS I'LL JUST HAVE TO DRAW IT SHITTY!! :D "

IF ANYONE KNOWS THIS COMIC I'M REFERENCING, PLEASE TELL ME AND I'LL LINK IT!!! Because it permanently and positively changed my brain chemistry.

No kidding, making the decision to just do my best even if it's not perfect, helped me a LOT. I was always waiting to "reach a certain level" to tackle a huge project because I felt like I'd never do it justice at my current state. Except I had been telling myself that kind of stuff for years and I still didn't start any projects!!

So the day I said, "Oh well! If I draw backgrounds shitty, then it is what it is! I'll learn from it and draw the next background a little better," Was the day I could commit fully to the project. I'll keep studying how to draw them better for my own benefit, but I won't let my skill issues stop me from even trying!

And for my limited confidence in full-color art, I solved that by making the comic in black and white with no-to-minimal shading lolol. Because I can only address one skill issue at a time before it takes me 25 years to finish this HAHAHA.

It saves a BUNCH of time to work with skill issues rather than against them! Because at least experience is gained in other ways, and who knows, maybe that new knowledge will help address the skill issues someday! So identifying your personal skill issues and deciding which one to try to grow stronger, and which one to work around, could help with big projects!

"Nobody will read this. I'm going to put months or years of my life into a dumb little thing nobody will even care about."

Learning how to draw for my own enjoyment instead of somebody else's was one of the biggest breakthroughs I ever made. Enjoying the feeling of being challenged artistically and just doing my best, even if it's not technically perfect, is the reason why I was even able to start this!

And just because someone doesn't directly like, comment or whatever on a post doesn't mean nobody saw it! I used to get really down on myself for the lack of engagement on my art on other websites.

I was a lurker for pretty much my entire teenage years and never posted my own stuff or commented much. But that didn't take away the fact that I really enjoyed the things I saw online. Those positive feelings were real to me, even when I didn't know how to articulate it in words. Granted, I grew up into a Words of Affirmation main, and I use words to tell people the positive things I think about them as much as I can! But I know not everyone prefers words to express themselves. So I think about the people that I don't know enjoy my work- that just because I don't see it doesn't mean I didn't make a positive impact on someone by sharing my stories.

THIS IS GETTING LONG-- UHHH, STORY TIPS!!

If you work best on technology, start building the story in a Notes app, or a Google Doc! If you work best with pen and paper, start a notebook and rearrange stuff as you need to!

Or if you're chaotic like me, a mix of tech and paper!! I bought a notebook with ring binding so I can remove and rearrange pages of drafts as much as I wanted to! Like here's two very rough concept pages of one Chapter 1 scene made months apart.

I'd say planning out the biggest basic plot points and then filling in between as I went was most helpful! I also have separate notes for character motivations, important story-changing events, etc... So I can have my own reference when I'm writing new scenes!

Okay this was a lot, sorry about the yapping! Hopefully it helps even a tiny bit. If you have any specific questions I'm happy to talk about my experience in the creation process! Or elaborate on anything I said above.

And finally, because I'm not a professional there are probably plenty of other tactics that could work better for some people. My ADHD probably doesn't help with the chaos of my process either, HAHA. But thank you for reading this far and enjoying the peek into the rainbow glitter and soap bubbles that inhabit the right side of my brain, heehee.

[frownyalfred]

20 Questions for Writers

I was tagged by @lurkinglurkerwholurks

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 146! It would be a larger number if I hadn't deleted all of my Supernatural fics back in the day. There were at least 30 of those, maybe more...

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

913,163 - I'm hoping to hit a million soon!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Batman, Superman, Justice League, Star Wars, Marvel

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Take Care of Business Everybody Wants You It Was Always You a sky of honey Anything Like Me

5. Do you respond to comments?

Not anymore :/ I have a really hard time keeping up with writing if I'm responding to comments. I hope my readers understand.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmm. Probably lonely town? Dick is getting de-fibbed in the alley by Bruce, and it's not clear if he's going to survive or not.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

here as I am is hilarious if you're into jealous!Clark. otherwise the weight (salmon ladder fic) always gets me.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Yep. Mostly on borderline, but on other fics too. I love how, as I've gotten better at writing, it's changed from "wow this sucks, your writing is awful" to "you suck because you chose to have [character] do this." Luckily I think most of the hate filters over here to Tumblr, where I can happily block and forget. These days, I mostly get people commenting about how I'm wrong about something. Wrong about something I researched and triple checked before posting...

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yep! All of them, I think? At least, I haven't balked at much yet. I'm not really into the excrement related ones, so I think that would be one of my no-go's.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Yep! bloodletting (Mandalorian/Star Wars and DC Crossover) and a few Marvel/DC crossovers.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yep, a few times. What I'm more pissed about is all of my textposts being monetized over on TikTok and IG. I could be making bank off of those, considering the reach. And several of them are basically mini-fics.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! Tons. Check them out here. There's also some podfics and related works there.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not really. I've made attempts but I'm really bad at it. I tend to write spur of the moment and follow my gut on where the conversation/action goes. Planning out a fic with a partner would do them a disservice, I think.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I really love Superbat, but Codywan is right up there with it. Something about Cody being a loyal BAMF soldier and long-suffering big brother gets me.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

My vampire AU. Not because I don't want to continue but I cannot decipher my notes as to what should happen next.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I'm very quick, I can type up a full draft in a few hours. I like natural, snappy dialogue and I think I'm good at it. I don't shy away from weird or uncomfortable situations. I'm comfortable with writing a lot of sex/etc.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I write too quickly, sometimes I get ahead of my plot. My dialogue and descriptions can sometimes be a little too bare, or I overcorrect and become too flowery. My fics take on the tone of whatever I'm thinking about at that time.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

If you're confident in your language abilities, go for it. If you're just plugging it into google translate, consider why you're doing that first. Is the addition of this new language actually something someone would say in that moment? Or are we just using it to signal to the audience that they speak another language? Is there a way to show this without telling? That being said, I love using Mando'a in my Star Wars fic, and I've studied it for a while now to be able to do so.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Supernatural

20. Favourite fic you've written?

Probably borderline or a sky of honey. Both took a ton out of me and I'm proud they're whole and standing on their own right now.

---

I'll tag anyone who wants to play! Go wild.

[smokinghorse]

do you know perchance any fanfic where it shows jean's reaction to being told that harry has amnesia... i am hungry for combinations of words.

or or what is your idea of how it happened??

I haven't read any fanfics in like a year so if there is one I wouldn't know, sorry. :( As for my interpretation, I think it involved a lot of nights at home alone fighting with himself, trying to determine whether or not Harry's amnesia is actually real. I think a part of him maybe already knew Harry truly couldn't remember shit but he was in such deep denial that he just didn't want to believe it and maybe tried to come up with excuse after excuse. I think a part of him felt hugely resentful of Harry for forgetting him so easily. Whether or not it reflects reality, Jean definitely felt abandoned, as if their partnership truly meant nothing. I think he likes to sit in bed a lot, just trying to fucking process the fact that this all happened. Jean is by no means a "victim" here, and neither is Harry. But being so close to someone and having them forget you is always devastating regardless of the cause. In this case, he's sacrificed a lot for Harry, and to have Harry forget about him, to Jean, just feels like the ultimate betrayal. The biggest cosmic joke god could have played on him. for him to give his entire life to his partner, to do so much for him, only for Harry to literally forget about his entire existence and all the time they spent together, yet somehow managing to retain seemingly "less important" parts of his past. Jean definitely ends up spending more time than usual ruminating about Harry. "It's torture, caring for someone who doesn't want to help themselves. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy." kind of thing. He starts questioning his own existence, maybe thinking he's pathetic for giving so much to someone who just can't seem to get their shit together. Harry is also a reflection of his future in a way, he can see himself going down that road and he's scared shitless of ending up in Harry's shoes because they are reflections of one another they are the same person in some ways (not in all ways, and not literally, obviously). My unfinished comic Chain of Grief is partially about this, and it's also partially about sensory association and memory, and how everyone you've ever known and loved leaves their mark on you in some way, some bigger than others. I've taken a break from updating it because my life doesn't really permit me to work on things like I used to as I have a lot less free time, but I have by no means given up on it and fully intend to finish it at some point. I have a lot of important things I want to say about Jean but unfortunately art takes time. I've had a lot of these writings planned for years and they went through several drafts while others were kind of made on a whim.

I might make a full post on this later bc I have a lot to say but for now this is basically the short version of what I think happened.

Also! Thank you for sending in this ask! I love asks. This was fun to answer.

[hassedah]

Hi, I hope requests are open!

I was wondering how the boys would react to meeting mcs family (let's just assume they have family lol) I feel like that may be very, very chaotic and fun

Vladimir meets MC's family:

Hi! How are you? I hope you are well! ^^

I'm back again. I have quite a few requests pending. I'll try to publish them quickly. Several of them are already in my drafts and are almost finished ^^.

I'm going to make a separate answer for each character with this request, given everything I've written for Vladimir and the fact that I like each character to have roughly the same length of response.

The next one to come out should be Beliath, I'm halfway through for him.

I hope you enjoy it! ^^

Take care of yourself and have a nice day! ^^

-----

Did he tell you he was stressed? Maybe a dozen times since you left the manor. Vladimir is sitting in the passenger seat next to you, you must have hired a car to take you to the town. It's a short hour's drive, but for once, Vladimir seems much less stressed about the car journey than the idea of meeting your parents.

"It's all right, darling. They're not going to eat you, you know, you are trying to lighten the mood by joking.

-I know!"

You give him a quick look. Vladimir is clinging to the door as if his life depended on it, and he can't help shaking his leg.

"Do you want me to stop the car? -No, I'm fine. -All right, if you change your mind, let me know. It'll make us a bit late, but my parents will wonder what I've done to you if you turn up so distressed. -We can't be late, it's impolite. -It's OK to be a bit late and it's better than having an anxiety attack in my living room, isn't it?"

He nodded. He wasn't as stressed when he left the manor, well, he was, but he didn't feel like he was running out of air. He spent more than an hour looking for the right clothes to wear, you saw her change outfits more than a dozen times before you decided to choose clothes yourself from her wardrobe. He's comfortable in it, which is the main thing, in your opinion, but he's worried about looking like a fool in front of your parents with his clothes from another century. Maybe they won't even let him in the house. After all, what kind of parents would let a monster like him anywhere near their child? If his parents had understood that the person who had transformed him was a vampire, he would never have been allowed near him.

Vladimir groans. He gets even more anxious by himself. Your parents won't know that he's a vampire, how could they? You haven't told them and it's not written on his forehead… well, he'll always look strange… What parents could leave their child with someone as strange as him?! His clothes are anachronistic, the way he talks is strange.

"Calm down Vladimir, you're worrying me. Are you sure you don't want me to stop the car? -No, I'll be fine. -I assure you my parents will like you. And it's only dinner, it's nothing formal."

A dinner party! Not formal! A first dinner at your partner's parents' house is very formal. He would have known perfectly well what to do in the 19th century, but in the 21st century! He has no idea, and he's already afraid of the mistakes he might make. How should he address them? What subjects are allowed to be discussed? Where should he sit at the table? He can't just sit anywhere, there are rules to be respected! He hasn't even brought a present for your parents - you said it wasn't necessary, but he feels it's really impolite. Perhaps there's still time to turn back? His chest is compressed with anxiety and he's struggling to breathe. You let go of the steering wheel with one hand to take his.

You, you would have preferred to wait a little longer before Vladimir met your parents. You had gone to see them alone on several occasions and you had spoken to them about Vladimir many times. They began to insist on meeting him. You often told your parents that Vladimir was allergic to sunlight and therefore you couldn't come for lunch. It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't the whole truth either. It was several weeks before they asked you to come for dinner one evening, and you tried to put the date back as far as possible, mainly so that Vladimir would have time to get used to the idea of meeting them. But they were so insistent that you couldn't keep them waiting for more than a week, on a moonless night.

"They're very nice, you'll see, but a bit protective," you try to reassure him. But I think that's normal for parents. They're also likely to make some not very funny jokes. If you don't feel well at any time, you can go and lock yourself in my room. Normally you'd be sitting next to me, so you can shake my hand if anything goes wrong. -Yes… I'll do everything I can not to make you feel uncomfortable with my presence. -I'm not talking about that, Vladimir. You won't cause any problems, I know that. My parents are going to ask you questions about you, about what you like, about your family. -No! No, I don't want anyone talking about my family. -I'll try to deflect the conversation if that happens, don't worry."

You squeezed his hand, then stroked his palm, to reassure him, and it seemed to work, because he relaxed a little. You weren't far from your parents' house and after another ten minutes or so you saw their house looming up in the dark street. You stopped just in front of the house before turning to Vladimir.

"Can we go now? you ask softly. -Yes, I think we can. -All right, then. You'll see, they're nice people, I'm sure they'll like you. -I wouldn't be so sure if I were you," mumbled Vladimir as he got out of the car, "not many people like me… -Don't be silly, everyone at the manor loves you and I've even fallen in love with you. That just goes to show you're someone to love, doesn't it?"

Vladimir gave a little pout without answering. You waited for him by the car and he came over to take your hand in his, and you smiled, leaning in slightly to kiss his cheek before approaching the house.

"It's a small house," Vladimir whispered in your ear as you approached the door. -Yes, I don't live in a castle. -I… I just want to say that even my country house was bigger "

You laughed softly.

" Damn, I really don't know how to express myself. I…. I'm making it worse for myself, aren't I? -That's OK. You make me laugh. You leaned in to kiss her again. I know you're not just saying that to be mean or to brag, I know you."

You rang the doorbell. Your parents only took a few seconds to arrive, almost as if they'd been waiting in the hall to let you in. There was a lot of talking, about your route, your health, the weather, all mixed up with more or less noisy and awkward introductions. Vladimir remained stubbornly beside you, with a smile on his face that you couldn't have described other than uncomfortable. Remembering that your partner is not used to so much commotion, you slipped a hand behind his back to reassure him, and he moved a little closer to you, your shoulders almost touching.

"I'm delighted to meet you," said Vladimir, glancing at you briefly to make sure he wasn't making a mistake. I am honoured to be invited to dinner. -Don't be so formal, young man," exclaimed one of your parents. We're not going to eat you. -I -Vladimir finds it difficult to use informal language. There's not much he can do about it, I think he'll be more comfortable if he keeps talking like that. -Do you really think so? It's strange, but so be it. Come on in, let's get off the porch, it's a cold."

You were pushed inside the house by your parents, who were still talking. There was a strong smell of food in the house and you were already certain that your parents had prepared your favourite dish to celebrate your visit. You all headed for the dining room. Vladimir sat right next to you while your parents sat opposite. His face was icy, a look he always takes when he's stressed and anxious and which often has the misfortune of making him appear extremely arrogant and cold. You grabbed his hand under the table to stroke it and try to help him relax, but he only squeezed your hand before turning his face towards you, you were sure your parents wouldn't see, but you could read the anxiety in his dark eyes perfectly.

The start of the meal went off without a hitch, except for Vladimir who, being rather fussy about food, didn't touch many dishes. The conversation went pretty well too, despite your parents' insistence that your vampire fill up his plate a little more.

"Really, you don't eat much, don't you like it? asked one of your parents after Vladimir had turned down another piece of meat with a contrite smile.

At the remark your partner opened and closed his mouth like a fish out of water. You immediately stepped in to save him.

"Vladimir has a small appetite, he never eats much. -All the same," continued one of your parents, "it's not good for your health. -I… it's very good… but I don't eat much… MC is right… -It's obvious, you're just skin and bones. -That's not a very nice comment, firstly, and secondly, it's not polite to comment on what people eat either. You're making Vladimir feel uncomfortable.

There was a pause in the conversation as you stared alternately at your parents, beside you Vladimir sighed with relief before taking your hand under the table to thank you.

"Ah, sorry, young man. We didn't mean to hurt your feelings. It's just concern. -It's nothing, nothing at all," mumbled Vladimir.

The meal resumed on less delicate subjects and Vladimir began to relax again. He spoke very little, however, content to answer your parents' questions. When the subject of the manor came up, things got complicated again.

"So, you all live in your house together, is that right? -That's right. -And it's your house? MC told me it was a manor house. -Yes… it is my mansion… -How well do you know your flatmates? I mean, seven people, that's a lot of people it can't be quiet every day. -We have been living together for several years…" replied Vladimir. We get on quite well, even if there is sometimes friction… -It can't be easy to keep everyone happy. I suppose it must be a lot quieter when everyone goes off to work."

You were going to tell a lie, but Vladimir's face betrayed you before you even had time to open your mouth.

"Don't they have jobs?! Your parents' exclamation made Vladimir stiffen in his chair, he moved back a little to press his back against the backrest and you intervened once again to save him. -Of course it is! Everyone has a job. Except Ivan, but he's younger and it's hard for him to find work in the current economic climate. However, he helps us a lot around the house, he does the cleaning, he tends the garden, he always goes shopping for us with Beliath and he's a very polite and very nice boy. Isn't he, my darling? -Y… yes… Ivan is a very helpful boy."

Your lie and your smile worked because your parents relaxed almost immediately before smiling at you again.

"Oh, we were scared for a moment, I thought they were all living in your house without paying. -MC didn't tell us about it, but what do you do for a living, Vladimir? -I… I work… Vladimir glances at you, immediately understanding his distress, and you smile at your parents. -Vladimir is a writer, it's difficult to find a job when you can't work during the day. And he writes very well, by the way."

It wasn't a total lie, of course, Vladimir had never published a single book, but he did write. However, you didn't often get the chance to read his stories because your partner didn't feel comfortable enough with his writing to show them to you.

"Oh, really… It's an original job… but it can't bring in much money…," worries one of your parents. -Money's not a problem, the house is completely self-sufficient," you reply. -The house may be self-sufficient, but you're not living on love and fresh water. -Our food comes from the garden. -The garden… and what do you do in winter? -We store the produce," you always reply, while Vladimir seems to be trying to become one with the chair. -And what about the meat? -I think that if we needed meat Aaron could take care of it without any problem," you answer, giving Vladimir a knowing smile. -Oh… yes, Aaron would have no problem with that. -And we've got enough money anyway to buy meat if we need it."

The discussion suddenly turned to the rising price of meat and the growing vegetarian lifestyle. Vladimir grabbed your hand under the table during the discussion and you began to gently stroke the palm of his hand to try and help him calm down. Slowly, you succeeded, at least until the discussion turned back to your vampire's work.

"I could never have done this job myself, I need to move around to feel good. Do you even do sport? -Er… no. I… I don't do sport. -Not even a little? It's very bad for your health. You should be careful. -I… I don't like it… but I used to go horse-riding. -Horse-riding. It's an expensive sport!"

You ignored your parent's comment as you turned to Vladimir with a smile.

"Did I? You never told me you'd been horse-riding," you reply, amused. -Everyone went riding," protests Vladimir. I even had my own mare. -A mare? But horses cost money to keep! How could your parents afford to buy you something like that?"

You ignored your parent again as he continued his tirade to ask Vladimir.

"And what was her name?"

Vladimir blushed and looked down.

"Oh come on, tell me. I promise I won't laugh. -You're lying, I was three when I named him. You're going to laugh. I know you too well… -Oh come on, what name could a three-year-old boy give his horse… Cherry? Raspberry? No, too modern… Artemisia? Aphrodite? Penelope? -No… I don't think you'll be able to find… -You don't? -I'll tell you… later…"

You smile before leaning over to kiss his cheek, the simple gesture enough to make him blush profusely, he stammers something you don't fully understand but he takes your hand under the table to kiss it gently. You are taken out of your bubble by your parents' discussion, which resumes. The clock is already striking twenty-two and you've just finished your meal. It's been a long dinner and you can feel that your partner is getting more and more tired and already just wants to crawl back into your bedroom to get some rest. However, your parents still have a lot to say and a lot of questions to ask.

"And do you dress like this every day? -Er… yes. -It's original, you must stand out in the street. -I… I don't get out of the house much. -Oh, yes, that's true. MC told us. Your flatmates must be surprised to see you dressed like that. -He's very handsome like that," you retorted immediately to end the discussion."

Your tone is dry enough for your parents to instinctively understand that the discussion is not appropriate.

"I'm not saying otherwise, but it's -Impolite to criticise people's dress? I suppose. -Yes, it is, sorry, bunny, I didn't mean to offend you."

The discussion changes again and Vladimir seems relieved, raising the eyes he had lowered during the discussion to look at you. You smile gently at him to reassure him and this is almost enough to make his unease and shame disappear completely. You talk again for several minutes as you eat the dessert, time passing slowly for Vladimir, who has to keep himself from asking when you're finally going to come home. He was happy, however, not to be included in the discussion, that is, until one of your parents asked him a new question.

"And your parents? What do they do? Do they live near here?"

Vladimir squeezed your hand so hard it almost hurt, you didn't need to turn your head to him to know he must have changed colour at the question. You shook his hand in turn before smiling at your parents and to divert the conversation.

"I saw on my way here that he was planning to build a new road through the forest. -Ah, don't tell me about it," it exclaimed immediately, sitting back in his chair. It's another stupid idea. They'll do anything these days, as if there weren't enough roads already… "

Without listening any longer, you turned your head towards Vladimir and stroked his hand under the table. He seemed lost in thought.

"Do you want to go out for a moment?" you whispered, leaning close to his ear. -I want to stay with you," he replied almost immediately. -All right, then. Don't worry, dinner's nearly finished, just the coffee left and I promise we'll go home straight away."

He simply nodded in reply. The subject never came up again, as your parents had obviously forgotten about it and were complaining about the traffic problems on the road and the many traffic jams on the way into town in the mornings. During the discussion, Vladimir had moved his chair closer to yours and you were almost shoulder to shoulder. After a while, your parents finally served the coffee and Vladimir had some tea, because to his great relief your parents had some. He felt like he could fall asleep with his eyes open so he didn't hear when one of your parents asked him a question, and you had to squeeze his hand to make him pay attention to what was being said.

"Can you cook?" repeated your parent. -No… I had servants at home. -So… you've never cooked?" asked your stunned parent. -Servants?! -Well…"

Vladimir gives you another pleading look to get him out of this situation.

"It's Béliath and Raphaël who cook at home."

However, your parents don't listen to you for a second. Your partner's revelation seems to have shocked them so much that one of your parents immediately continues on the subject.

"Can you cook pasta? -Well… you need water, I suppose and… fire… -Supposed to? -I… I've never cooked pasta… -You've never cooked pasta! But everyone knows how to cook pasta! -I… it is complicated… I… -But who cooks in your flat? finally asked one of your parents, turning to you. -Raphaël and Béliath, as I've just told you. He cooks very well, so don't worry about the food. -It's crazy not to have cooked before. -But I've cooked before. It's just something complicated. -It's not complicated to cook pasta. -MC, please. -Vladimir doesn't need to cook. Aaron, Ethan and Ivan don't cook either and nobody has a problem with that. -But come on, sweetheart. Cooking pasta isn't complicated! -I wouldn't let Ethan cook pasta if my life depended on it. If it were up to me, Ethan wouldn't even set foot in the kitchen to make himself a cup of coffee."

Luckily, your distraction worked and your parents started asking you questions about Ethan, who wouldn't be able to make himself a cup of coffee without setting fire to the kitchen. It certainly wasn't very nice for Ethan, but you didn't have many scruples: if it would allow Vladimir to be serene again, you would be able to claim anything. The meal went on for a while, the cups of tea and coffee had been empty on the table for a good hour when you finally managed to make your parents understand that you were going to leave.

They walked you to the door and kept chatting, so you stayed in the driveway for another long half-hour, repeating several times that it would be a long way to your house and that you couldn't stay any longer, before one of your parents came up with a new topic of discussion that made you stay five minutes longer. Finally, you managed to get out of their grip and finally got in the car to go home.

The way back was completely silent, Vladimir seemed as exhausted as the time Aaron had forced him to train in combat, his head resting limply against the headrest and he answered the few questions you asked him in very short sentences, finally he even stopped answering you and when you turned to look at him, you could see him asleep with his head leaning against the window. You only woke him up once outside the manor house and even though the night was still far from over Vladimir decided to go to bed almost immediately. You followed him into the bedroom to rest with him.

Vladimir breathed a sigh of relief as he collapsed into your bed. When you joined him, he immediately snuggled up to you.

"I thought the evening would never end," murmured the vampire. It was hell. -Oh, my darling, you're not going to like this… -What?" asked Vladimir in a worried voice. -Well… it's polite to invite my parents to eat here too… -Please, forget politeness," muttered the vampire. I don't ever want to leave here again, I don't ever want to be invited to a meal. It was horrible, I'd forgotten how much I hate dinner parties. -All right, all right, I forget," you smiled, starting to stroke her hair gently to soothe her. No more dinners, and if anyone offers to take you out to eat, I'll bite them. That's fine with you."

Your vampire nodded, his face completely buried in your neck. You laughed before shifting to kiss the top of his head.

"But I'll only do it on one condition. -What's that?" mumbled the vampire in a muffled voice. -What was the name of your mare? -Lady Princess Cherry Rose Camomile? -That's a pretty long name for a mare," you joked. -My parents said exactly the same thing…"

You laughed again before kissing her again.

"My poor darling, you've had an exhausting night. -I made a lot of effort for you. I didn't even complain about the car journey. It just goes to show that I love you. -I love you too. You saw how I saved you several times from my parents' questions. If that's not proof of love, I don't know what is. -Yes, that's true. You're my hero and mine alone."

[wannabelilybriscoe]

author interview

Thanks for the tag @leavesthatarebrown! Work's been a right bitch today so I'm going to use this as an excuse to take a break and pretend I'm on Hot Ones with you oop careful around the eyes, darling. :)

total works: Only 2 eep

total word count: 275,728 (apparently I can't write short form except when it's poetry)

your top 5 stories by kudos/likes? I fear my stats are not impressive or exciting because I only have two stories. I feel like the new kid around here.

A Song for the End of the World 

The Road to Love is Covered in Ice and Slush

do you respond to comments? Yeah, embarrassingly quickly, too. Comments make me so excited and I usually read them several times, then read them again later.

what's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending? Angstiest of the two is the zombie one, of course. As for the ending? Well...I stand by the Happy Ending tag, despite the fear I have apparently instilled in readers. :)

what's the fic you've written with the happiest ending? The Road to Love has a very happy sappy ending.

do you write crossovers? Nah. Although I have been threatening (myself) to write a Marauders band AU where they guest on Sesame Street. It would be as stupid as you expect it to be.

have you ever received hate on a fic? No, everyone has been exceedingly lovely!

do you write smut? No, I'm too embarrassed! I’ve only done fade to black. Respect to all you freaks who just go whole-hog, truly. Although! I did just write my most explicit scene to date for an upcoming chapter of ASFTEOTW but it's draped in flowery similes and symbolism. Me, peeking through my fingers at my doc: ahhh tasteful nudity.

have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge. I think my fics are too indie for that.

have you ever had a fic translated? Nope!

have you ever co-written a fic before? When I was ohh I think 15? My bff and I co-wrote a Naruto crackfic and I'm not sure if it's still out there but in my mind, it's gone to the winds of time. Now let's never speak of this again.

what's a wip that you want to finish but don't think you ever will? I started a story where Remus and Sirius are both doing the solo parenting thing and they meet in a parenting subreddit. It was supposed to be a heartfelt comedy but then it started to hit too close to home as someone who drove herself crazy on parenting reddit for a while there. :)

I also have like half of a very stupid one-shot called "Cormac McLaggen Saves the Day" written and well maybe I'll finish it one day and maybe I won't. That one would be for the Dramione fans.

what are your writing strengths? *checks notes* Reviewers have called my writing vivid, which I think is pretty neat! I've also been told I write suspense well. And I like to think that I'm good at characterization. I've had quite a few people tell me they like how I write Remus and Sirius. That makes me really happy because what I care most about when reading is how well I can connect with the characters. Feels good to know that people are connecting with the characters as I'm writing them.

what are your writing weaknesses? There are probably some weaknesses I'm blind to, but I can definitely say my impatience. I'm like a child when I finish a draft lol I just want to publish it and go looky looky at what I've done! But then I find a bunch of stuff I want to edit after. So, if you're someone who reads a new chapter as soon as it's published, my apologies, you're getting the raw thing. I wish I could be better about sitting on my writing for longer. But also, it's my fun writing so I'm choosing to not feel too guilty about it.

what are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? The only other language I'm fluent in is French, so I only feel confident writing full sentences in that. Otherwise, I only sprinkle in the odd word in another language. Wouldn't feel comfortable doing more unless someone who spoke that language could help me.

what's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to? I wouldn't mind writing something Dramione sometime but I think it would be harder for me to get inside their heads, for some reason.

what's your favourite fic you've written? How do I pick between my two children? I like them both for very different reasons. I've poured so much thought and research and love into ASFTEOTW. It's definitely more ambitious than The Road to Love. But The Road to Love just kinda flew out of me effortlessly, and it was so fun and comforting to write. Ahh they're too different, I can't pick!

I don't know who hasn't done this yet...seems like most of my moots have? Please take this as an open tag!

[reality-of-woes]

WOES DOCTOR WHO - AUDIO SPECIFIC DR INTRO

A/n: If you saw my unfinished draft post of this.. no you didn't!!!!!!1!!!!!!!11 anyway Woes first DR intro everybody clapped everybody cheered (^_^)

●Personal Info:

Name: Sygnisaktralen [Sygnis for short, Tral to my younger brother]

Age: 320

Nameday [Birthday]: Late spring

Gender: Agender [He/Xe]

Sexuality: Bi, Aroaspec

Regeneration: 0 [<< Still on my first body]

Chapter/House: Drome, House Highwheel

Species: Gallifreyan, unranked [<< not Time Lord rank, basically]

●Backstory:

I was loomed [basically like. Genetically created in a big tube??? Thing???? Don't worry abt it okay its scifi bullshit lol] into House Highwheel by the recently appointed Housekeeper and her wife, a senior member of the Chancellery Guard. I was loomed specifically to reach Timelord status, & at first I seemed perfectly capable, a well behaved child and very fast learner- if easily distracted. However, as I grew it became apparent that I had severe errors in the weft leaving me very unwell for weeks at a time. This, combined with the schism madness I later developed, led me to miss the mark in my education and fail the time academy entrance exams, letting down my cousins and leading to my dissolution as an adult. Instead I went to study art and history with the Patrexis, and after graduating earned a position as an aide in the Arcadia City archives. My love of history and the arts, plus the connections my job gave me, were what eventually led me to meet the Cardinal and cemented my place in my DRs story.

●Timeline + Other Fun Things!!:

° My first shift takes place during the events of Gallifrey S2, and follows them through to the most recent installment [Time War Era] with minor canon deviations [mostly to allow for my place in the story.] At present that's roughly 200 years from start to finish, but it'll increase exponentially as the War goes on & audios keep getting put out.

° I have a pet cat in this DR! He is as-yet-unnamed (since I don't actually get him until like. 50 years in, maybe more) but he's truly the handsomest boy,, I already lobve him <3

° Despite the fact that Gallifreyans can't really have autism as such, I've kept all of my autistic traits in and scripted my Sp/In to be Pythian Era history :3 you have no idea how excited I am to see the Pythia ruled alternate universe. I will be insufferable!!!!!

° I am romantically interested in the main cast yeas yeas it's true.. haven't scripted anything specific but. I mean I call them my partners in every other post I'm not fooling anybody tidkgyirschkchkuxg 💀💀

° Looking into the schism as a child made me go mad, giving me permenantly overactive telepathic senses that I had to learn how to control alongside my general education. I scripted this in to mirror my CR experience with my disabilities, since there's not really a way to carry them over into a genetically modified alien species 1:1. It's also the other reason I was sent to study with the Patrexis, since they're known for their telepathic aptitude :3

[theothin]

Okay, so.

It's 5:30 pm. As with most Friday nights, I get in my car to drive to a 6 pm Magic the Gathering draft.

It takes a couple of tries to get the car to start. I don't think much of it - the car is about two and a half decades old, and it's had trouble starting before, although not normally this bad. When I start driving, it feels sluggish - I assume it'll function normally soon, but the "soon" keeps not happening.

(I later learn that I really should have taken this more seriously.)

I get onto the main road, and start making my way towards the game store. I start to notice the car being oddly... jittery when it's stopped, particularly the steering wheel. I tell myself, well, hopefully it'll do fine to get me to the MTG event and back, then I can get it looked at over the weekend.

(Horrible idea. Never listen to this instinct.)

On the way, I stop at the red light, then the car has trouble starting back up. I restart the ignition, and it's around this point when I start to smell something funny. Hopefully something from my surroundings, I tell myself.

(Othin, you fucking idiot.)

A bit further, and the smell hasn't gone away. Also, something looks funny. Is that... smoke? Inside the car? Okay, I wasn't imagining it, that's definitely smoke. Emergency procedures, abort mission.

First things first, gotta get off the main road. I take the next turn onto a side road - and it's only two lanes, one in each direction. I go a bit up the road, looking for a proper place to park, and it doesn't take long of failing to do that before I go okay, no, enough waiting, I need to get out of here. The other cars can deal with it.

I park, call my dad, and explain the situation. He says it sounds like I'd had a big oil leak, and if I drove that much without oil, my engine is probably toast. Given how old the car is, that would probably be the death blow to it, although we'd already expected it wouldn't last much longer regardless.

I call Triple A, at 5:49 pm, to request a tow truck. They ask if I'm in a safe location - I interpret the question as being about immediate personal safety and say yes. (I later learn that blocking a two-lane road does not qualify as a safe location. Maybe if I'd said no, things would have gone differently.) It takes a bit of time to figure out how to explain where exactly I am, since I don't know which municipality I stopped in or how best to describe my street location, but after a few minutes they go sure, we'll have someone over there within the next hour, and they'll call when they're on the way.

In the meantime, I call my dad back, for more of his car expertise. He says it should be fine to sit in the car so I'm not out in the cold, I just shouldn't turn it on. It still smells horrible, so on his advice, I lower the windows, and sit there, waiting.

Around 6:30, I haven't heard anything, so I call back to see if there's any updates. The automated message says the expected arrival time is 7:21.

I don't have headphones with me, so I wait until it feels okay to put the windows back up before taking the opportunity to watch anime, and pull up the next episode of Yuyushiki. Meanwhile, my dad texts me, I mention the road, and he goes wait, that's dangerous, you should really wait on the grass by the road instead. I tell him I don't think I'm likely to get hit, but at his insistence, I reluctantly comply, after finishing the episode. Back to shivering as it gets increasingly cold.

Around 7, I call again, and the automated line still says the expected arrival time is 7:21. Around 7:10, there's still no word about the driver leaving, so I call and ask for a live rep. The rep tries to check in with the tow truck, but comes back after several minutes to say that there was no number available for the driver himself, and that he attempted to contact the company they'd contracted for the word directly, but wasn't able to reach them. The rep says the driver is showing me as next on his list, and the only alternative would be restarting the process with a new driver, which would put me further down the list. He suggests waiting at least another half hour before trying anything like that.

I am getting skeptical of these time estimates, and extremely tired of shivering outside. I call my dad and ask him to come, he says sure. He also suggests calling the police to let them know about the road I'm blocking and get their help with keeping other cars from crashing into me, but I say I don't want to do that while I'm alone and wearing a dress. He says he doesn't expect it to be an issue but doesn't push it.

Dad shows up, goes wait, you meant the straight part of the road? I assumed you meant the twisty part further up, no one's gonna crash into you here. (In other words, rather than shivering, I could have spent that time in my car watching another episode of Yuyushiki.) Still, it's getting dark, and he says we should set up the reflectors he put in our cars, for exactly this sort of situation. It turns out they're only in his car, not mine, so we set up his reflectors.

Dad goes hey, want to see if the engine got messed up enough that we can see just from looking at it? I go sure, why not. We pop the hood and, instead, see a huge fucking pile of twigs and leaves, right in the middle. Dad speculates that it's a bird's nest and starts pulling it out. While he does, we start hearing some sort of chirping sound. We both speculate that it's a bird, but he notices that it's not a bird and not coming from the car itself - it's a baby squirrel in the pile of nest he'd pulled out. Doesn't seem like it went well for it.

We wonder if that was the whole problem. Dad doesn't notice signs of significant oil spilling, and he checks the oil level but says it's fine. We give it a shot, and the car seems to start normally. We drive a bit down the street together, but I notice it still feels pretty clunky. I suggest switching cars so he can evaluate mine. He notices the light saying "service engine soon", asks if that's been on since I left home, I say yes. He says he doesn't want to drive it without checking how serious that is and goes to look it up in the manual.

While I'm waiting in Dad's car, I call Triple A again, and explain that we've moved the car slightly. By this point they've ditched the first contractor and are sending a new tow truck from a different company. While I'm talking with them, Dad comes back with a question about my car, I say I don't know and that I'm on a call. He keeps trying to get more of an answer from me but I'm not sure what else he expects, eventually he gets frustrated and goes back to my car.

I'm waiting on hold for the rep to try to get more info from the new driver, and text my dad to ask what he wants. He says I should hang up and we should just drive the two cars home. I ask if he's sure the car is safe, he says no but he doesn't want to keep waiting.

Around 8:30, we start driving in each other's cars. Dad takes the lead, and is in the middle of driving my car up a steep hill when it gets stuck. He instructs me to carefully drive past him, then turn around to meet him at the bottom of the hill. He decides it really isn't fit to drive home but that it should go somewhere that isn't in the middle of traffic, and finds an area that's blocked off for construction. Dad speculates that in addition to the nest getting caught in stuff, there may have been other issues from things like wires getting chewed on.

(While he was driving, I could smell that awful smell from his car, behind him. I swear I can still smell it.)

I call Triple A yet again, to explain where we moved the car this time. They say it might take another couple of hours for the tow truck to arrive. We go, no, we're not waiting that long. Dad asks about the procedure for unassisted towing, and we end up putting the keys with the car to leave for the tow truck to use. Dad also has me call the police's non-emergency line to tell them about the car we're leaving and why, so they won't take issue with it in the meantime.

Around this point, Dad asks about the friend I was talking to. I go, what are you talking about. He says, on that phone call. I say, I didn't have any phone calls with friends here, all my calls were to him or Triple A. He says, wait, that's who you were talking to? I say of course. He says, so when I told you to hang up, you hung up on Triple A? I say yes, that's what you insisted I should do. He says whoops.

We return home around 9 pm. I get out of the car first, spend a while waiting by the door for my dad to catch up, and remind him that I no longer have a house key with me, since it was on the same key ring. He goes wait, you left your house key with the car? I point out that really, it was both of our mistakes, since he was using the key ring as well, and was the first one to stash it.

Dad says we'll need to go back for it, after a much-needed chance to pee and eat dinner. I also use the chance to start making a document of things to remind myself to keep in mind about cars: supplies to keep on hand, warning signs to watch for, things to keep clean, and also the value of having someone else in your car every once in a while so they can point out things you've overlooked. Bunch of things he'd been trying to get me to keep in mind forever, that never seemed as important until I'd gotten a chance to really see the consequences first-hand. Once I finish the document, I'm thinking of printing it out and taping it somewhere visible while I drive, so that maybe I'll remember to think about it more often.

It's a pretty quick drive back to the car. In part, because my dad drives really fast. While zooming down the hills we'd been stuck on, he points out that this is why he'd really wanted me to be careful, because people sometimes drive like this on them. I point out that maybe he should not do that.

We get the house key back around 10 pm. While we're driving home, I get a call back from the police, saying it's fine to have the car there for now, but it will get in the way of the construction vehicles, so we've gotta deal with it by 7 am if we don't want to risk the police towing it instead. Dad points out that tomorrow is Saturday, the cop says it'll be fine if the construction isn't happening that day, but we do need to make sure it's gone by their next work day.

Back home, I call Triple A again. They say they've switched to using a third contracting company, but this one finally has someone dispatched, along with a tracker. Next time I check in, they say they've picked up the car. Around 11 pm, I get a notification saying it's been successfully delivered to the repair place we asked for.

A learning experience, in a number of ways. But also, man, what a mess.

[biffhofosho]

Haven't seen you post in a while. Hope you're doing ok 💖

Ah! Thank you for caring <3 <3 <3

Yes, I'm sorry, I haven't. :( I have been very well, don't worry (as I hope you are). I'm on Tumblr every day checking in; I just haven't had anything to post. I confess I have been writing a ton, but for the first time in half a decade, it's been for another artist. .-. I feel a little guilty/unfaithful about it lolsob, so I haven't published anything, but I also can't stop until it's done, even if it never sees the light of day here. My muse might need an exorcism. >.<

I've also been missing MX an inordinate amount. Like, maybe an unreasonable amount for what it is. Maybe Kyunnie's cb will cure a little of what ails my heart. Perhaps this is my escapist coping mechanism. I still have so many stories I'm burning to complete for them, but I promise I will. Just gotta finish consuming the forbidden fruit of another. ;)

Let me check my archives and see if I have something close to completion that I can share. There's... more than there probably should be in my drafts folder, and I know several things are super close.

Thank you again for your thoughts! Please take care of yourself, too!

[box-architecture]

which are the aus You have more on your ming latetly?

A mixture of them!

I'm staring at the Dreambur AU I have (Strangers Vassal) and wondering if I should post what I had planned for it to look like. I'm struggling a lot with writing it, partially because I don't have a lot of people to bounce ideas off of, partially because it's an AU that would have a lot of fight scenes, something I don't have a lot of experience in and am unsure how to proceed with.

I really enjoy the concept of it, and I want to write for it, but it might once again turn into a bunch of shortfics in a series rather than the longfic I originally wanted. It's disappointing that I can't seem to consistently write longfics, but if I don't accept the limitation I might risk not getting anything done at all, and that's potentially more disappointing.

The Communication Knife AU is almost always on my mind. It's evolved from just pure demons and rotations to being a huge comfort that I can just idly think about throughout the day.

It's really neat, because I started out as a Dream-centric multishipper who wasn't sure if I could vibe with Punz and Sam closing the triangle, but after marinating in the idea, it's now really important to me that they become something too. They grow from two people fighting around their relationship with Dream to something based on trust and blunt honesty and Forgiveness Withoit Forgetting. They can be deeply affectionate with each other in a way thats different from their relationship with Dream. Not bad, not in a way that excludes him, just different.

The AU has also tentatively opened me up to exploring 2nd Gen characters, something I've literally never been capable of before. I have a lot of vague ideas for who gets together post-main story, and how those relationships works and why. Ponk/Foolish/XD is a ship for example, and I've designed a possible child for them? As well as designed Fooshs Totem children? It's always a maybe for if I actually want to give people kids, and it's not really the point of CKAU, it's just really fun to explore the rest of the smp in this sort of fix-it au and how it impacts their lives in the After of it all.

It's also helped me expand my Minecraft Lore and Worldbuilding Bible (how in my headcanon the mineacraft world works and its history/lore, including tying other media's like Hermitcraft and Maricraft to the dsmp to make everything part of the overall world.)

Writing CKAU post-story had also, ironically, made me enjoy benchtrio more, as I get to talk to my friends about their interpersonal dynamics and how they work and how they end up finally at peace. Especially considering Tubbo and Ranboo are bitterly divorced for a long time.

I had a lot of small ideas for a DNB Mass Effect AU in a similar vein to To Tear Asunder being my Dragon Age AU, but I feel really guilty getting into that when I haven't even finished the Philza fic or the Techno fic I have for the latter. I have significantly less people to bounce ideas off of for To Tear Asunder, which is why I struggle with it sometimes.

A lot of my writing in the beginning was done through utilizing my manic moods, but now that I'm better medicated/no longer constantly manic, it's led to me going a lot slower with writing. Demons (PWP stuff) are a lot easier to write, because they require significantly less scene set-up when I can use the sexual act as a template, and being horny-brained isn't particularly difficult.

(Also. No Plot Nessecary. Hence the Porn Without Plot. Plot is really exhausting to write sometimes.)

Obviously it's a lot better for my health that I'm no longer manic, but it's still disappointing that I can no longer work myself into a tizzy and write 30 pages of something (before collapsing and being unable to do anything at all for the next several days.) Give and take and all.

I briefly was very insane about Benchtrio fucking Dream in various ways. I made a whole Teacher/Student AU about it that's in my drafts, god willing I get my new laptop and can finish that up. I really enjoy CNC and bodice ripper type stuff, so it's pretty fun to explore crack AUs where Dream is just trying to be normal and the 3 most abnormal people in the world come into his life.

I'm not really a fan of the Tommy/Dream dynamic where Dream is preying on the Poor Helpless Child, especially because it has a habit of taking itself Very Seriously. I'm not looking for serious and dark and the villainization of Dream. It's a lot more fun for me to explore a strong, confident, and very tired 20-something desperately trying to figure out how to deal with the 17-18 year old being horny on main. Also it's just really interesting to me when the younger character takes advantage of normal social and power dynamics and subvert them so they can have the older character sub.

^I'm not sure if the explanation there is perfect or makes sense but I'm always happy to try to talk more about it if you'd like.

I have a little more of the Warden Hybrid!Dream type stuff in my head that I wanted to write out, mostly just a lot of Porn With Minimal Plot for purely kink reasons. I also have a Dream/Ravager fic I'm supposed to be posting, but God only knows when I can finish it. I need zoomies.

[emeraldspiral]

So I don't know how this happened, but after years and years of trying to write a book and abandoning everything I ever attempted because I couldn't get through even one completed first draft, I finally finished one way back in 2018 or 2019. Even more shocking, I managed to get through several rounds of editing with the story still in one piece. Then I got it to a point where I felt like it was as good as I could really get it without soliciting any feedback. So I posted it on Critique Circle and after all my feedback came in and I'd done a few more revisions I got it to a point where I actually thought it was polished enough to start looking into publishing. It was sometime in March or May of 2020 I think when I sent out my first queries to about 4 or 5 agents and I was shocked that one of them actually requested a full. I was expecting dozens of flat rejections or non-replies before seeing even a kernel of interest.

While waiting to hear back from the agents I'd queried I tried working on a few different stories, but then I started thinking about a bunch of things that were bugging me about my book and getting new ideas I thought would improve it greatly. So I decided not to query anymore agents and instead start a new round of revisions. Based on how the writing and revision process for me had been before, I was expecting this to take me maybe a month or two. But somehow it's been FIVE FUCKING YEARS and I still haven't gotten through even one single completed new draft.

I'm sure part of it is that the pace I was working at slowed down dramatically because during that 1-2 months I was waiting to hear back from agents I broke the habits I used to have to maintain a steady, reliable flow of productivity and it took me an excruciatingly long time to pick them up again.

But I think mostly the reason for all that time vanishing and leaving me with nothing to show for it is that I did the same thing I always do where I keep coming up with new ideas, but to implement them I have to go back and start weaving them into the narrative from Chapter 1, and half the time those ideas don't even stick and I go back to what I had before or replace them with something else. And regardless of whether it's a big change that requires massively rewriting or throwing out entire chapters or just altering, removing, or inserting a few lines here or there in a couple of chapters, I still ultimately end up disatisfied because there's still a ton of stuff that I don't like that none of these changes ever actually seems to solve. There's still scenes I want to throw completely out but I can't figure out what I could have happen instead to accomplish the same thing. There's still plot points that are vital to the story but I don't know how to make them happen in a way that doesn't feel contrived without having to add a lot of detail that has to be explained in a lengthy monologue. I keep wanting to add more detail to make everything feel really fleshed out and fully realized and thought through but I still want the story to feel simple and streamlined and not overly-complicated.

So the current status of my book is that it's in a million pieces and it feels like there's no end in sight to this fruitless quest to put it back together again. And this is a feeling I'm used to experiencing with every other story I ever worked on, which ultimately led to me giving up on it and trying something else. And I thought this time it would be different because the experience of writing it initially felt really different. A lot of it came together very naturally and the pieces fit together better than I imagined. The fact that I actually managed to finish the story and revise it as many times as I did and still have it end up in one piece, and actually showed it to other people was just leaps and bounds beyond anything I'd ever accomplished before. I used to look at my folder full of story ideas and get exited about the next one I wanted to write because I thought finishing one story meant I could finish others. But now when I look at that folder I just imagine myself ending up here again, right back where I always end up, unable to finish anything because there's always a million little problems I can never figure out how to fix, so it feels pointless to even try anymore.

[thesymphonytrue]

Hiiii! You know I love your longer fics—the Ghosts and Echoes series and your wing au fic! And I was wondering how you stay motivated to work on longer fics. And come up with manageable plots that are still interesting to read. (Sincerely someone working on a longer project while also experiencing writers block 😅)

HIIII!!! 🥰 thanks for the ask, @ascreamintothevoid-blog <3 <3 <3

Aw thank you so much!! I had fun writing them!! And your comments kept me going when I hit roadblocks, honestly!! 😅

MOTIVATION: oh man motivation for longer fics....well...I'd say with my first long fic, Ghosts, I kind of kept into it blindly and then had to finish it, it was my first fic I'd posted for the White Collar fandom and while I had about 50% of it finished, if I hadn't gotten such encouraging comments, I don't think I would have ever finished it. The comments gave me such motivation, because people were reading my story and liking it and I was just....thrilled 😭🥹 On that vein, maybe I crave human interaction or feedback on my stories too much, but with all of the long fics I have written, I have started posting them when I'm about 50-80% finished writing it....then the reader feedback helps me get to the final sprint to the end. so...THANK YOU to anyone who has commented on my longer fics, it really helps with motivation! 🥹

The other two, I definitely had to do more "scheduled writing" to finish them---I made a goal of writing a chapter per week while simultaneously editing a previous chapter. It was a reasonable goal at the time and helped me through the slumps of not being "inspired"---I just would sit down and word vomit into my draft and then clean it up later 😂 Long fics feel like a marathon. They are fun, but exhausting!

PLOT DEVELOPMENT: Okay, so plot. LOL. I struggled with this, because, ya know, fanfic is so often inspired by just ~vibes~ 😂 Let me take the wingfic AU as an example for how I developed the plot, so there will be spoilers for that below if you haven't read it:

Normally my fics start with a vibe-like inspiration and then I kind of weave the plot around that. With longer fics, I figure out my climax of the story, and then scatter the characters and make their individual trails to get there. If that makes sense?

So let's take Neal in the wingfic for example. His climax in this story is after having searched for belonging, he finally finds his "family." That was the basic goal. Then, I had certain moments I wanted in the plot: the wing sacrifices, for example, so I placed those moments in the plot. THEN, I connected those moments. The connecting of the moments is the hardest for me lol. ( I do outline in detail long fics in a journal and draft several outlines before settling on one. )

Then, after I have my main characters plots developed, I start weaving in the villains and side characters. In this fic, I had never planned on developing Peter's father, John, until I started writing----then all of a sudden his story just appeared in my head and had to be told. So I had to adjust my original plot, but his story made the plot much richer, so perhaps he was meant to be there all along. It's weird. But most of the time plots like that just...it's like the characters actually tell me their story in my mind and I'm just listening to them.

and hrmmm making them manageable and interesting? Well, to me they don't seem riveting because I know the whole story. LOL. I have to remember that the reader is only seeing what I have shown them so far, so they likely will find it more exciting than I will writing it. I keep it manageable by limiting the characters and character POVs...and...by not getting into macro plots (like social justice for Flyers like I wanted to, but it was just too much for me to handle).

OKAYYY long answer but I hope that helps!! Thank you so much for the ask!! I actually have been struggling with lack of motivation/writer's block lately (seriously, my mind is EMPTTTYYYY for fics rn 😭) and this helped me remember how fun it is to write and makes me want to get back to it.

Also good luck on your longer project!! you can do it. Just baby steps and small chunks at a time---that's how I stayed at it, a tiny bit of writing per day, and when you need a break, take a break! the inspiration will flood into your brain when it's ready 😎

[siriuslylantsov]

HELLOOO, dear alisha. it's been a while. but here are my thoughts as promised (i cannot find the draft so i'm doing it again). ALSO TELL HOW HAVE YOU BEEN WHATS GOING ON WITH LIFE <33333

i can finally say i've finished all the series up until now that i'm watching DDBA when it comes out. CRAZY to think my last ask i was only halfway through iron fist. also i have a really shitty memory so i'm probably missing things.

now on to more serious business, my ranking of all the series:

daredevil (love of my life)

HOLY FUCKHOLYFUCKHOLYFUCK, third season???????????????????

absolute masterpiece, i'm pretty sure it was my favourite season. mygod i was INLOVE with agent nadeem. mygod was i crying when he was killed off. i was also crying my eyes out at that last scene with all three of them sitting together, and foggy writing their names on a napkin.

sigh

2. the punisher (also love of my life)

AMAZING, both seasons. though maybe i have a slight predilection for the first one because of david. they made such a great duo.

and i totally see the karen/frank thing. in my opinion they have way more chemistry but whatevs.

3. jessica jones

i don't wanna talk too much about the ones you haven't seen cause i don't wanna spoil you just in case but i can say that i definitely liked it wayy more than i was expecting. season one was cool but i feel like it improved as the seasons passed, at least for me.

4. the defenders

was great, thought i was going to like it better. i was genuinely waiting on the edge of my seat to see matt in the nypd shirt cause i had seen the gifs on here, lol.

5. luke cage

great, second season was GOOOD. the ending? uhmmm. anyway. had some good fucking characters, though.

6. iron fist

my god, that man was insufferable, but i have to say when the series was ending i was starting to not hate him as much.

amazing how in each series i managed to be severely attached to at least one character. sigh, i love fictional characters <3

i also watched some series that aren't technically from the defenders saga but the site i was going off of told me to watch them and i did. i watched she-hulk, echo, and hawkeye. loved them, especially she-hulk. i think that's controversial, i remember people really shitting on it but i was having the time of my life watching it. AND HAWKEYE MY GOD DO I LOVE A CHARACTER WITH A BOW!!!!

NOWW

DDBA, WTF. they let me be happy for just about fifteen seconds.

FOGGY??? HELP??? i was heartbroken and also i had gotten spoiled before starting to watch it, in the comments of an edit of matt and him. i couldn't see anything with my eyes all full of tears. i genuinely HOW COULDD THEY DO THAT IN THE FIRST EPISODE and i understand but UGHHH. i saw some theories of people online saying that in the comics foggy fakes his death and i'm hanging on to that thread of hope but wth.

now the psychologist and matt. GIRL, BRING BACK KAREN I DONT CARE WTF. i used to be such a matt/karen hater so i'm taking this as some kind of karma against me because what is this. tell me what you think ofc but in my opinion they don't have an ounce of chemistry. i don't dislike her as a character (i don't really like her either cause i haven't seen much of her yet) but... just. bring back karen, marry her to matt and i don't care anymore.

he had so much more chemistry with that one woman in that singular scene where he was negotiating that guy's sentence than with heather.

HELP I JUST WENT TO LOOK HER CHARACTER'S NAME AND SHE'S SEBASTIAN STANS PARTNER? didn't know.

to finish with this ask i just wanna say i'm a bit confused about fisk getting out of jail. i don't know if i've missed somewhere where they explained though i don't think cause i looked it up and people were just as clueless. but i don't care i'm loving the show.

YAYYYY, glad to be back to bombard your askbox. hope you don't mind.

p.d: have you watched stranger things?? (i'm not having a phasei'mnothavingaphasei'mnothavingasteveharringtonphase)

p.d.2: sad i can't be more detailed, my memory is indeed shitty. but that's a plus kinda cause in a few months (now really) i can watch everything again having forgotten 90% of everything.

p.d.3: i had to uninstall discord cause of lack of space and i just realized i had a message from you from february :(( my phone is on its last breaths.

p.d.4: what would be your ranking? with the ones you've seen ofc. though i would recommend all the series tbh.

OH MY JO this is the ask of all asks, the dd talk of all dd talks

putting this under a cut because yap city 🫡 and some ddba spoilers

quite literally nothing has been going on with life 😞 ive got like exams! in a month... yay....

the third season is incredible i loooove all of his with religion issues and speaking off i need ddba!matt to go to church please this is so important

and i LOVED the maggie reveal oh my goddd i need him to go see his mom in season 2 pls. when he mentioned her in the bank ep in ddba i almost cried. PLEASE GO TO CHURCH

nelson murdock and page 😕😕

also YAYYYYY PUNISHER let me talk i loved season 1 i ate up the entire thing, like learning more about what billy did and the whole system was crazy, that being said i wasnt a fan of season 2. it felt too condensed, the two plot lines going on at once was so messy like billy on one side and then william lamontagne jr on the other and the girl??? i liked her a bit, but im also just a sucker for father daughter plots so that probably played into it

did you LOVE when billys face got cut up by the mirror

are you also a big fan of frank with a beard i love frank with a beard frank with a beard is my fav thing im so glad we got a good chunk of frank and his sexy sexy beard in ddba

its WILD how quickly i grew to hate iron fist in defenders without even watching his show or seeing him anywhere else, it says a lot about his character.

umm i dont think ill watch any of the other netflix gang unless they somehow show up in ddba s2 then i might have to but for now i dont think i will

so my ranking still stands 1. daredevil and 2. punisher (idk where defenders goes)

oh my god i LOVE hawkeye and i love kate and yelena so much 😭😭 i think i watched upto the matt ep in shehulk but thats it and i still havent watched echo, so you BET i was surprised when i heard fisk got shot in the head??

OH FOGGY MY BABY 😭 it didnt get spoiled for me buttt i knew it was coming. the trailer, the photos, there wasnt enough of foggy to like ease my fears. this one shot of karens face covered in blood was the final straw for me, i just didnt expect it to happen TEN MINUTES IN LIKE LET ME FUCKING BREATHE. that heartbeat track while matt fights dex will haunt me forever i fear

and for the fake death theories im TRYING not to get my hopes up, id really like to believe it but the swiftie in me has been clowned too many times by rep tv theories to fall for shit again.

elden henson is set to return for s2, in what capacity tho idk

theres also this blank space of time that i want back, like the blip and the years of nelson murdock and page and just them serving lawyer, i really wanted all of that but they just get right to it and i feel left out.

OHHH HEATHER i agree with you, theres such a lack of development on their relationship AND her character. now this could be considered bad writing but i think its intentional, its meant to reflect matts overall disconnect to her. there is no chemistry there whatsover and hes hiding so much. like i would not be sad if she were to die and considering theyve been together for quite a few episodes that shouldnt be the case.

but also thank you heather glenn for the matt murdock shower sex scene i will forever be grateful that i got to see matthew murdock WET

omg wait whos sebastian stans partner??

no cus same i have no idea how that happened with fisk but im justtttt choosing to ignore it

i have some annoyed thoughts to get out about that mf. this big baby is soo pissed that matt is back as daredevil when his ass has had a DUNGEON and has been THREATENING people to stay loyal to him, ohhh im a different person now shut the fuck up man stop lying also i cannot believe hes mayor im so annoyed

and his TASKFORCE HIS MF TASKFORCE I HATE POWELL I HATE THE PUNISHER EMBLEMS STOP TARNISHING MY MANS NAME

im so excited for frank to BEAT their ASSES in the finale FUCKKK im gonna bust i caught a clip in one of the trailers of frank with an axe I KNOW THATS RIGHT 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

i am alsoooo loving the show, i know everyone was worried that they wouldnt get the netflix feel and tbh it isnt like the og show at all but i really like what theyve done and im so happy with how its going

have you seen much of the s2 set photos im so excited

i have seen stranger things!! i felt super left out when s4 came out in 2022 that i decided to binge it before volume 2 came out. ive got a shirt and poster on my wall! its kinda fizzled out since then but i expect the phase to come back when s5 comes out (later this year i believe?? im SO excited) oh my i love steve i love his hair i think hes killer

omg babe its okay dw about it im glad youre back 🤗🤗

also WE HAVE TO TALK TLOU ITS IN TWO DAYS IM SHAKING

[practically-an-x-man]

2, 8, 14, 15, 19 for Bolts and Blasters?

Oooooh thank you!! <3

Even More Fic Writer Asks

2. How did you come up with the idea?

Ooooh, man, it's been long enough now that I honestly don't know! I've had bits and pieces of this plot for years now, it's been floating around in my brain basically since I started writing fanfic (though not near as sophisticated as it ended up being), so it's hard to say where specifically I got the idea.

I will say that like most of my early fanfic ideas, it started more as a way to help myself sleep. I have fairly severe insomnia, and one of the techniques I tend to use when my thoughts just won't slow down is to pick out a story and "jumpstart" my dreams, in a way. A lot of my earlier fanfics, or at least my earlier fanfic ideas (some of which I wrote in that original form, some of which I revamped, some of which I still haven't written), began as a sort of mental catalogue to occupy my mind until I could convince my brain to get to sleep.

^^ This is getting a little off-topic, but that's still a technique I use! I've held onto some of those original ideas and I do revisit them from time to time, or I'll envision whatever chapters or scenes I'm focusing on writing at the time. It doesn't always help, but it can usually keep my thoughts from spiralling out of control.

8. Did you cut something out of the outline or an early draft? What was it and why did you decide to cut it?

Hm.... I've talked about this before here and there, but I basically rewrote the whole third act and cut out the sequel. Originally, I approached Hux's comatose state after Exegol in a different way, and I had a whole convoluted sequel plot planned to resolve it. But... by the time I got up to that point in the fact, it felt both more poignant and better for the pacing to instead play with this whole "linked hearts" idea and finish out the fic through that.

Aside from the OC revamps I've done (like original-idea Nikoletta versus written Nikoletta), I'd say that was the biggest overall cut/change I've made to a story I've written! Usually I've got the ideas pretty well locked in by the time I started writing it, but this idea was with me for so long that my writing style ended up evolving with it, so I ended up cleaning up the ending actively as I wrote it instead.

14. Talk about the fic’s opening scene & how you approached it

Ooooh, so the opening scene basically involves the old "trapped in an elevator together" trope, which leads to Indie and Hux's first meeting on a personal level (they'd interacted here and there professionally, but that's not the same).

Honestly... when I wrote that, I didn't know how to approach it. I had plenty of ideas for once they'd met and the way their relationship would build, but didn't have a way in place for how they'd actually meet. Not to mention, it needed to be a good hook for the reader, and it needed to place Hux in a position where he'd be able to connect with someone on a personal level.

Basically, I needed him to be vulnerable enough to lose the façade and open up enough to Indigo for there to be intrigue between them, but not so vulnerable that the adrenaline response led to a shutdown of its own. The elevator trope, goofy as it may be for a fic like this, actually ended up working well for that! Maybe I wouldn't open the fic that way if I wrote it now, but it was definitely a good opener for the skill level I was at when I started it.

15. Talk about the characters’ struggles & how you decided on those

Oh boy, there's so many struggles they go through XD It's a long fic! And both of them are kinda basket cases!

The biggest overarching struggle that both of them go through is a struggle for identity, particularly in how identity is shaped by one's upbringing and the stressors in their life. Both of them struggle with the roles imparted onto them by their parents, they struggle with the identity others see them as when that doesn't align with who they want to be, and they struggle with finding identity that doesn't involve war after they've both been raised into it. With all the different internal and external struggles they go through, it all goes back to that central theme.

As for how I decided that... I typically build my OCs as vessels for the canon characters' stories, as a way to reflect their themes and explore a lot of those deep emotions in their characters, and I always thought that Hux was a character with a lot of interesting, underutilized themes. Look at his backstory in the books, look at the glimmers of potential story in the concept art, even look at the way they choose to complete his arc in canon - I thought there were a lot of neat threads there, but the writers bailed out at the last moment instead of seeing them through. He clearly has a lot of issues of his own when it comes to his identity, and separating that identity from his father's, so I built Indigo off of that same central theme in a way that would entangle both of their stories.

19. While editing, did you kill any darlings? What were they?

Hm... not really? You could say I killed that original sequel plot I talked about, but that wasn't exactly a "darling" of mine. It was a neat idea, but it worked better as a self-indulgent, not-quite-polished "daydream catalogue" to help me sleep than as a full written work.

The next-closest would be the alternate reconditioning plot after Indie gets captured on the Judgement, but... I didn't kill that one. That's Torment. I literally wrote and posted both ideas specifically so I didn't have to kill that darling, because I loved it too much to fully let go of.

In general, if I'm pleased enough with an idea to consider it a "darling", it will live on in some form or another. Either I'll work it into the story somehow, or I'll just slap it down in a oneshot and call it an AU.

[ruemilley]

thoughts on The Blog + 2024 year in reflection + next year goals

hi there, long time no talk. if you don't remember why you're following me, it's probably because i wrote a lot of mp100 fanfic like five years ago. i haven't posted much on this blog this year besides reblogging some fundraisers and i want to try and use this more. hope you're doing well!

i think i tend to be pretty precious about what i put on this blog, because in my mind i wanted it to be creative updates and art only, but more and more i realize that i really enjoy reading what artists i follow are up to and thinking about whether it's creative or not. so i want to try and post more casually too. sharing what im up to + occasional reblogs. i hope you enjoy that kind of stuff too.

i made a tag on the blog for stuff ive made called.. #stuff ive made. so it'll still be easy to find my art and writing. ill probably make a pinned post with that info in a little bit.

ok, so other orders of business, how was 2024 for me?

2024 was pretty good for me. it was not quite what i thought it would be-- i had a few different goals at the beginning of the year that i ended up shifting on. i also cannot find my new year's resolutions from last year which is surprising because i pretty much always make them.

however, i made some general accomplishments that im pretty happy with, such as:

switching from misc freelance scrambling and part time work to a 40hr/week job, with way better pay

going to water aerobics twice a week fairly consistently, which is the first time i've consistently exercised maybe ever

taking my health more seriously in general

finishing a rough draft of a comic script (which i then put aside, due to next accomplishment)

finally dipping my toes into game dev which i have always wanted to try but was always too scared to

cutting way back on social media usage and being stricter with how much time i spend on my phone

generally Putting Myself Out There more and making friends in da city

so i'm pretty pleased. however, as i think at the end of every year, i still feel my creative output is not what i wanted it to be. admittedly i did draw more than i have in a while. i worked on several projects and got a few things off the ground. but not much i feel i can share. i feel like i consistently did more, but my output was just very slow. this is partly from working on larger projects and things that are time consuming, but man, i want to prioritize this stuff more.

i also find that i am struggling a bit about what i want to be working on creatively. i have ideas but everything's a bit half formed. i think this year i've unearthed some insecurities about the quality of my work and ideas-- i think previously i just told myself that if i sat down and did stuff i would be a savant, i just hadn't gotten around to it yet. this was definitely just from a fear of failure. ok, so i did sit down and do some stuff and it was kind of just ok-- at least to me. what now?

so, i need more time to work on stuff and i need to develop my Artistic Voice or whatever. point one is a bit easier to find a solution for, even if it's scary- im planning to cut back my work hours in the new years and set aside fridays for personal project time only. this is mostly stressful because everything on earth is only getting more expensive but i think i just need to do this. if i don't i will always wonder what if.

...point two is vaguer. how do you develop an artistic vision and goal? admittedly, i think i put way too much pressure on myself to have consistent creative styles and interests. but at the same time, out of all the things i love, there has to be something im drawn to creatively, right? even if i haven't realized it yet? besides anime fanfic epics?

well, probably just in the doing things will emerge. i'll focus on that for now. this seems like a similar question to high schoolers asking how you get an Art Style, and not realizing that's just something that naturally emerges when you draw a lot. you can certainly point it in certain directions, but it won't settle and be yours unless you do it a lot.

okay, what else. i have some other personal goals i won't share here, but one more i WILL share here is i think in 2025 i really want to engage with less passive media. i love to put on a youtube video essay and play a game on my phone. lots of half attention to things that don't deserve my whole attention. i think that's ok sometimes to relax and unwind, but i feel like i missed out on so many cool stories by doing that. i feel good about this goal because it's less about Reading Twenty Five Books This Year Because That's Good For Me and more about experiencing stories because i want that.

this year i read stone butch blues and i remember thinking at the end of it, why am i not reading things like this all the time? why am i not devoting myself to experiencing beautiful works of art? why am i more likely to put on ten hour let's play of a mediocre PS2 game that no one has ever heard of than to watch a two hour classic movie that will emotionally resonate and maybe change my life?

...well, it's partially because that gets emotionally exhausting. it's ok to chill out some. but i don't want to pacify myself all the time. i need to think about how to make this a Measurable Goal or whatever, but i'm excited about it.

i think that's all i will put here. i hope you have a good new year's and that 2024 wasn't too painful for you. i feel as though most of the internet was cruel and disheartening this year- endless windows into the worst of humanity. things that were painful to read, while also knowing they would be thousand and thousands time worse to experience. even so, i saw a lot of kindness too-- people reaching out to help, and the generosity of my friends and family. i hope you saw some of that too. here's to 2025.

[striveattemptfail]

ao3 wrapped [writers edition]

stolen from here. answering everything myself bc i'm too impatient to wait for people to ask me things lol. all stats are as of publishing this post ✌️

(cw: gifs included for some answers)

——————————

1. How many words have you written this year?

20,488 according to my stats page

technically speaking though i've written way more bc i have a bunch of wips i haven't posted yet 😅

2. How many works did you publish this year?

nine (9)!!!

i wish i could round this out to 10 before the year ends but i'm 90% sure it's not gonna happen 😔😔

3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

You'll be there to push me up the hill — poolverine — 154 kudos — 900+ hits

it's chockfull of my personal movie!deadpool headcanons and things i want for post-canon dp&w

i only wish i could've squeezed in even more scenes to include russell and x-force but i barely managed to finish it on time for poolvertober so alas

special shout out to: Feel your way — poolverine — 113 kudos — 1.1k hits

i haven't written smut in literal years so i'm both shocked and grateful that i 1) wrote it at all, and 2) finished + posted it lol

4. What work of yours has the most hits?

for 2024: knee deep in the couch seat and you're not eating me out — 1.5k hits

in general: Just take my hand, and let’s enjoy — miragen & kuroko — 8k hits

5. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

knee deep in the couch seat and you're not eating me out — 8 comment threads + a lot of very sweet comments on tumblr and twitter (ಥ‿ಥ)❤️💛

i rushed to post on time for that day's poolvertober prompt so i wasn't very proud of it

but i'm so glad that a ton of people liked it anyway!

6. Favorite title you used

knee deep in the couch seat and you're not eating me out — insp. by chappel roan's casual

i saw the honda odyssey scene, then i heard the song, and I Immediately Knew i had to bastardize these lyrics for a fic lmfao

once again, apologies to ms roan /o\

i just!!!

does this not embody those lyrics?!?!?!?!?!!!

7. If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most?

i haven't repeated an artist for titles this year!

in general though, i use red velvet english lyric translations the most LOL

8. Pairing you wrote the most for this year?

wade wilson/logan howlett aka poolverine

it's not even close

i'd be embarrassed but tbh i'm just shocked i even managed to finish one (1) fic at all

much less publish several of them!

i meant it when i said the poolverine brain rot might pull me out of my misery era (no jinx!)

9. Favorite pairing you wrote for this year?

poolverine

mustard and ketchup old man yaoi has me in a chokehold but i'm not particularly upset about it looool

10. What work was the quickest to write?

chaos, we so catostrophic — poolverine + blind al — 1.1k wc

i finished it in one frantic session filled with 10-min sprints 😅😂

my original idea for that day's poolvertober prompt was getting too long to finish on time, so i spent ~2 hrs in a haze laughing at myself while i thought about how funny it'd be for blind al to shoot a glock inside the apartment lmfaooo

11. What work took you the longest to write?

maybe it's a little too early (to know if this is gonna work) — poolverine — 5.2k wc

the dang &1 scene took me way too long to write bc i couldn't figure out a sideplot for it

did it need a sideplot? no.

would it have bothered me to no end if i didn't set the scene properly? yes.

and that's not even getting into the fact that logan and wade kept getting horny instead of keeping things cute and sweet like i originally planned!

i rewrote each scene multiple times bc they couldn't be serious smdh (=_=)

12. How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year?

uhhhhhhh—

*checks phone*

*checks laptop*

—a lot.

at least 20.

definitely more.

i'm too lazy to count all of them between the fact that i have multiple draft files of the same fic + many of these are wips i've been sitting on for years

whoops soz

😁😁😅😅😅🥴🥴🥴🥴🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

13. What’s your longest work of the year?

You'll be there to push me up the hill — 5.4k wc

despite being the longest and hitting a wall with a few of the scenes, it was relatively easy to write

like i said, it's just filled with personal headcanons ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

all i had to do was verbalize whatever the hell goes on in my head and put it on paper lmaaaooo

14. What’s your shortest work of the year?

Back Seat — poolverine — 380 wc

it was supposed to be 300 words flat so it could be a triple drabble but these two idiots don't know how to shut up lol

ngl i completely forgot about this fic so this is likely the correct answer for q.10..........

.....that said, i'm not rewriting my answers bc i'm lazy whoops /o\

15. What WIP are you taking into next year with you?

.......wasn't this already asked in q.12? lmao

i guess i'll give a special shout out to the poolverine professor/student au from an outsider pov bc the premise is so funny and i have it all planned out already

will i actually finish it? who knows!

certainly not me ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

16. What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag?

actually informative tag: Canon Compliant — 8/9 works

fandom specific tag: Logan Is So Done (X-Men) — 4/9 works

17. Your favorite character to write this year?

i love writing wade wilson aka deadpool bc our inner monologues are very similar

babbling on and on and on happens effortlessly

(it's the rampant adhd lmao)

both of us also have a crude sense of humour so writing the stupid crap that comes out of wade's mouth is easier than with other comedic characters bc i have the sense of humour of a 12 y/o boy and luckily wade usually does too lol

the problem is i am not near as witty as him, nor do i have the wherewithal to actually write how brutal he truly is sometimes, nor am i acquainted with pop culture enough so he can break the fourth wall effectively

which now sounds like i shouldn't be writing him at all but WHATEVER! IDC!!!

i still love writing him as a ramble-y, annoying prick bc i am a ramble-y, annoying prick myself LOOOOOL

18. The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?

logan howlett aka wolverine

i know i wrote in his pov more than wade, but still

writing logan is hard for a simple reason: i'm not like him

my biggest self-critique is that it just seems like i gave logan adhd

his internal monologue is filled with run-on sentences when it really shouldn't be

and then his actual dialogue is just.

constant grunting.

lmfao.

i do understand and relate to him in some ways, but there's also a reason why i haven't really gotten into him as a character despite being adjacent to the x-men franchise for most of my life

he's a complex dude and i'm honestly just grateful i haven't received flames yet (omg i'm in old fart) for not writing him with the care he deserves

19. What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?

honestly i wouldn't mind staying on the poolverine train for another year

it'd be nice to branch out to other ships i enjoy (tbh i can't believe i haven't posted anything for jayroy, or more wlw)

but if poolverine wants to keep their hold on me for even longer, who am i to stop them?

LOOOOOOL

20. Which work of yours have you reread the most?

everything bc only a third of them were beta'd lol

21. How many kudos in total did you get this year?

as of drafting this post: 1,099

hopefully by the time i publish this i'll break 1.1k! 😩🙏

ETA: I'VE BROKEN 1.1K KUDOS FOR THIS YEAR WOOHOO \o/

22. Which work has the most comments?

it's a tie!

You'll be there to push me up the hill — 18 comments total

Feel your way — poolverine — 18 comments total

23. Did you do any collaborative works this year?

unfortunately no 😔😔

i've had tremendous help from @broosepayne and @comatose--overdose with idea bouncing though!

24. Did you write any gifts this year?

again, unfortunately no

25. Did you receive any gifts this year?

nope!

which is just fine since i couldn't give any gifts 😅😅

26. What’s your most common category?

m/m

shocker, i know (<- sarcasm)

i actually have some m/f and f/f wips but none of them are anywhere near complete or polished enough to post 😩😔

27. What do you listen to while writing?

for the past few years, it's usually playlists from this channel!

28. Favorite work you wrote this year?

You'll be there to push me up the hill

refer to q.3 for why lmao

(can you tell i'm running out of steam trying to finish this? /o\)

29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

it's a tie between

“He believed that I, a hero, could still save someone after I refused to save him.” Piotr’s eyes wander back over to where Wade is, whose hands are in the air as he enthusiastically elaborates on something to a very patient Laura. The two siblings laugh at something he says. “Wade is not perfect,” Piotr finally rumbles, “but perhaps what he is doesn’t need to be.” (via You'll be there to push me up the hill)

and

And with a body aching from a day’s hard work, a full belly, a dog on his lap, and a man he realized was dangerously close to falling in love with sleeping peacefully by his side, he thought, I think I could live the rest of my life like this. (via tanoshii omoide — victuuri — 600+ wc)

30. Biggest surprise while writing this year?

it truly is the fact that i wrote AND published anything at all

i've been in a slump (creatively and otherwise) bc of my aforementioned mentioned misery era

jotting down ideas has been the extent of any creative endeavours for a very long time

finishing anything was a shock

actually posting them even more so

the fact that it happened more than once is nothing short of a miracle tbqh

mr reynolds and huge jacked man put crack something in this year's old man yaoi and i am very grateful for it!! 😂😂

WOOH i finally finished! if anyone actually reads this: you're a real one and i thank you<3