#i have school tomorrow but i stayed up to draw this
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I bought nasb today
#its on sale for only 5 dollars if you have a switch#usually its like#60... so get it if you want it idk#anyways#i have school tomorrow but i stayed up to draw this#OHHH ON UM#thursday though me and my friends are gonna watch a movie in the gym im so excited#we all did good on our finals so the school set it up :3#anyways this meme is my life i love that it comes back every pride month#last year i did a ddlc one hehe#art#my art#invader zim#nickelodeon#dib membrane#zim iz#zadr#zim and dib romance#okay im gonna go to bed maybe#you know what that means...
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when the twig and the crepe
#south park#creek#sp creek#tweek tweak#craig tucker#why did i stay up and draw these#i have school tomorrow#last few hours of November break
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whats the point in life if everybody stops liking me the moment I start feeling even just a bit sad
#i am so so so lonely i feel like curling up and dying#and kinda like im gonna be sick#i don't wanna go to school tomorrow .. not if everybodys gonna ignore me#not even just my friends ignore me. everybody does#today i lived through that one scene in serial experiments lain where lain walks into class and her chair is missing from her desk#and nobody acknowledges it or anythign#my life always feels like a sel episode and im very scared and lonely#sorry for vent posts but i do not have anywhere else. i wanna die and i have no energy i feel sick#and i just haven't been able to draw properly for the past few days somehow#i can't execute any of my ideas and now school work is gonna start piling up#but the worst part is i feel all alone. im so alienated at school and its just like nobody in this world wants me around at all#i don't wanna go to school tomorrow .. why go into school if im gonna be alone there#but also why stay at home if ill be alone at home??? idk dude why is any of this even a thing#i should just find other people to talk to. i hope this year will be the year i stop being shy and find people that accept me#i really hope so#oh so this is#cw vent#i always forget to tag stuff nowadays
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update: i am becoming more and more sick as we speak
#kinda makes sense tbh considering ive allegedly been around two sick people for like a week now#and by allegedly i mean definitely#but still picture me doing the shocked pikachu face#or like the confused tom from tom and jerry face#whichever you prefer#anyway yippie if i get worse im not gonna go to school and im gonna get some work done maybe unless i collapse#like maybe i could wrap myself in a blanket and take my tablet and work on the posters in peace or draw ocs or work on my-#animation assignment some more#finally a good excuse to stay home#and im only half joking#if i still could do school online i would#not having to use public transit saves me so much time and energy#anyway hoping i dont wake up tomorrow dying but also i will embrace that possibility if it comes#but also i could force myself to go to school even if im sick and push thru#but also like maybe i dont want to make other people sick??#anyway#personal
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sunglasses pro more like. More like cringefail pro amiright guys. *cricket noises*
My favorite guy who didnât survive parkour prison đ
#i totally dont regret staying up til 2 am to draw him.#i have school tomorrow#sunglasses pro#sunglasses guy#Sunny pkciv#Sunny parkour civilization
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Now that I've been out of school for almost 2 years I have this weird thing happening to me where I don't get the daily anxiety that came with school anymore. But now whenever I need to research something or learn about something that I'm not really into, I suddenly do get that school study anxiety/executive dysfunction again and it's messing with my brain because I don't know how to deal with it anymore. In school at least I felt it daily which also wasn't good but I knew the feeling and I knew what to do with the feeling. But now I don't anymore. Or more like, I'm so sick of it. I'm out of school, this feeling should have stayed in school but it didn't! It's still following me and I can't make it go away
#just#i don't think i've done or felt much in the last few months#because i stopped going to uni and i only went to work like once or twice a week#but now i have an internship#it starts tomorrow and this last weekend i've suddenly started feeling all this anxiety and Obviously i don't like it#like#what if i can't deal with working five days of the week for eight hours?#what if i stop drawing again because i'm too tired to do it when i get home?#i needed to look up some stuff about something (staying vague cause i don't want to say where the internship is)#and i just#didn't#because i still have adhd#and i should be excited about this internship and i Am but i'm also already stressed out because i feel like i'm not prepared#i Could have prepared myself#but i have adhd so my brain said no and so now i don't know what i'm supposed to know tomorrow#and it feels like i'm in school again trying to study for an exam and failing to do so#and it just sucks#lea's random thoughts#adhd#like just#i don't want this internship to feel like school all over again
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art app stop crashing challenge
#i probably shouldn't have started drawing rn bc i'm on a roll and i'm not gonna wanna stop#which if i end up having no self-control i might stay up til a stupid time..and i have school tomorrow....
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Wants and Needs
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Pairing: Sugar Daddy!Joel x Reader
Summary: Bills are high; your dadâs boss wants to help. How you pay him stays between you and himâfor now.
Warnings: 18+. Protected piv. Explicit power imbalance in an exchange of sex for money, so dubcon, technically. Soft dom!Joel. Sex toys. Squirting. Oral (f!receiving). Overstimulation. Daddy kink. Age gap. Praise kink.
Note: Bohananâs is a steakhouse in San Antonio, TX.
Word count: 8.4k
You wanted a car. Joel needed to cum.
It wasnât the arrangement a girl your age shouldâve made, but what could you do? Your dad drank half of your college funds away, and your mom was long gone.
The next best thing was Mr. Miller, your fatherâs boss. Heâd understood better than anyone what money could buy. What it might do. For him, it was pleasure. For you, it was a futureâor what little remained after bills and loans and exorbitantly-priced car repairs bled you dry.
You took the job at the firm on a whim. You didnât want to be a lawyer anymore, though your dad and Joel were. You didnât want to be done with law school, though 3L had already long since ended, and that dreaded so-called âminimum competencyâ test was drawing close on the horizon. In short, you couldnât afford to pay for bar prep.
With Joel, you could.
It was true that tax law paid pretty well, but a part-time job would never really be enough when your family was treading water at all times. Your dad liked to gamble and drink, and your brothers got all of their brains from him.
You got the short end of the stick, plus the receiving end of another. Lucky for you, Joelâs felt pretty good going in.
Today you were somewhere south of Austin. Your truck wouldnât start last week, so youâd agreed to come along on this business trip knowing full well what you planned on asking your boss as soon as you had a moment alone.
âCDP hearing atâŠ9:45.â You checked the itinerary twice.
âAlright.â Joel nodded.
âLunch with Javier, Ezra, and Dave at twelve.â
âMhmm.â
âPhone call with Revenue Officer Acacius at 3:30.â
âFor theâŠ?â
âMartells.â
âOkay.â
âI finished Lucien Floresâ Form 433-F for your review and left notesââ You stopped to tap your finger on a short white pile of papers between you and Joel on the desk, ââin the margins. Still need bank statements from him.â
âLovely.â
Joel eyed the stack at first, but his gaze strayed a little.
âYou should probably plan to talk strategy with my dad before Mayor Garciaâs audit tomorrow, too. Looks like a couple non-cash contributions are being disputed now.â
For a second, your eyes flitted up to him, too. It was brief.
âSure. Whenâs your daddy free?â he said.
You blinked, then scanned the schedule.
âLooks like fiveâŠor six, maybe. Heâs got a consult withââ
âI wasnât talking about your father.â
You looked back up. Joel was smirking, of course. His hand had drifted a comfortable, innocent distance past the papers and across the table, to you. The pair of you happened to be in one of the glass-paneled conference rooms nearest the hotel lobby, so he had to be discreet.
He never let his fingers stray too long on yours in public. Presently, his thumb grazed your knuckles extra slow.
Posing a question, maybe.
You didnât have the time to be tactful now, unfortunately.
âI need $2,700.â
Joel, your boss, your daddy, whatever, had to pause at that. He didnât move his hand immediately, but he did stare harder. Longer. He searched your face for the joke.
â$2,700?â he repeated.
âYes sir,â you answered out of habit, wincing only a little, âMy truck stopped running last week, and itâs justâŠa lot.â
The cost. For Joel, it wasnât even a drop in the bucket, but in your world, it was a make-or-break, fuck-your-whole-budget-for-the-next-six-months kind of bad. Suddenly, your cheeks felt warmer than they did before, and you forced yourself to look away. Peering out across the wide and gently rolling terrain of San Antonio and trying to pretend there was something thrilling to see. Youâd almost forgotten how much you hated asking this.
âI can make the deposit tonightââ Joel started.
âNo,â you interrupted. You wanted to turn but couldnât. You just shook your head and kept staring out there, âNot now, I meanâŠI need to earn it over time, I justâŠâ
You stumbled over the words. It was like your lips, your tongue, and your teeth were all suffering from the same sort of embarrassment pervading the brain, and you couldnât bring your mouth to form the sentences right.
Iâm not asking for a handout. I need to earn the money.
However âearningâ may have been grossly misconstrued in the context, it was a labor all the same. You didnât love it, but you didnât hate him, either. Joel was nice, albeit old enough to be your father, and it didnât seem that he was nearly as predatory or perverse as he couldâve been. Youâd been working for him for two months now, and the idea had been your own when the cash had gotten tight.
Back in April, youâd explained to him, calmly, that you couldnât take the bar exam unless you got some extra money quick. That you wouldnât accept his charity, but youâd pay him back in other ways. Joel had been against it at firstâyou were the daughter of his best friend, after allâbut eventually, his carnal needs won out over his sense, as every other man wouldâve done, you guessed.
At first, youâd started slow, but that hadnât lasted very long. You fucked him regularly now, though never had you asked for an amount of cash this big out of nowhere.
Joel blinked and put a hand on his hip, like he always did when he wasnât sure what to say. The silver in his soft, dark locks shone more in this light. Heâd lost the smirk.
âYouâve doneâŠplenty.â Now sounding sheepish.
You tried to protest again; Joel stopped you.
âI mean it. Hey, look at me,â he said next.
You did, hesitatingly. You turned from the window, and out of instinct, folded your arms over your chest. Joel paced closer to you and then he was watching. Pausing.
Brushing your arm with his and glancing once over your shoulder to make sure no one else was around to see.
He leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to your temple.
When he pulled away, your skin was practically ablaze.
âMr. Millerââ
âJoel,â he corrected, quiet, âAnd youâve done enough. Let me cover the car just this once, okay? Sweetheart?â
You didnât realize you were pivoting again. That your gut was doing somersaults and your heart was ready to climb up and out of your throat. Your neck was burning.
It wasnât even anger you sensed was simmering under the skin until you turned back to him, and your eyes flashed with ire before the words were even spoken.
âI donât need your pity, Mr. Miller. I said I want to pay.â
âItâs Joel. And I said youâve done enough, soââ
Ire morphed to something more in a blink.
You didnât mean to say it, but you did.
âFine,â you huffed, suddenly exasperated, âIf youâre so fucking opposed to me paying my way for this one simple thing, Iâll get another guy. Forget I asked.â
It was a low blow, for sure. Joel knew how badly youâd wanted this to stay between just you and himâand he would never dream of seeing you âearning your keepâ with anyone else. His expression said as much as soon as heâd heard your words; his whole face hardened at once.
But then youâd turned to leave. You didnât care what he wanted to tell you, and if you did, you certainly werenât brave enough to stick around to hear Joel say it then.
So you left. He had a full, busy day ahead of him anyway.
You woke up wet.
In an effort to avoid your boss, youâd run errands all day. Buried your nose in a sea of Civil Procedure notes as soon as you got a second alone, almost vomited seeing the Erie Doctrine, and went back to your hotel room to try and study there. Once you had, you napped instead.
Now your clothes stuck to your skin; the sheets around you were soaked. You peered over the big white duvet holding your body interred and saw smoke overhead.
Or steam.
Yes, definitely steam. It was drifting from the bathroom, where the door was thrown open. You shifted up to sit.
âTess!â you yelled, âShut the goddamn door, Iâm boiling.â
As a law clerk, you werenât afforded the luxury of a suite to yourself, so you shared it with the other new grads on work trips like these. Tess Servopoulos loved long, hot showers and never closed the fucking door. You groaned.
And, feeling depleted of all energy from your studies and the stress and the steam searing every inch of your skin, you flopped back in the bed. You kicked the covers off your legs. Youâd just lifted a hand to wipe the sweat from your forehead, when an awful, fresh realization dawned.
You glanced at the clockâ3:37.
âFucking hell,â you hissed.
You were supposed to meet your dad at two to get some paperwork signed. You needed to have that filed with the court by four. He was probably engaged somewhere else by now, whether it be a client, a conference, or a couple white lines in the bathroom of a partners-only club downtown, and you wouldnât have a hope of reaching him here. You rubbed your face and groaned again.
Youâd set an alarm for 1:30âyou knew you had.
Where the hell was your phone? Why was it so warm? What if heâd called? Aw fuck, heâs probably blown that thing up to hell and back by now. Maybe he was drunk. He had to be. Where was Tess? Where were your pants?
Youâd made it up to your feet, clumsily, and faced a full-length mirror. Your bottoms were gone. You closed your eyes and screamed inside, remembering why they were.
âGlad youâre getting some use out of this.â
The second you heard it, your lids flew open. You turned.
And, standing in the warm yellow glow of the bathroom lightâholding the culprit, your vibrator, like a prizeâwas Joel. Naked as the day he was born, save for one thin towel around his hips, and grinning. Moisture glistened on his chest and pooled about his feet, and his hair was smooth, tamed, and combed back neatly from his face.
He waved your silicone toy in the air, and immediately, you regretted giving him your room key the other day.
âI thought we agreed youâd wait for meââ
âWhat the hell are you doing here?â
Your voice was thick with sleep. Joelâs own was slow, dulcet, and kind as it always was, even when teasing. When you grit your teeth, he just set the toy aside.
âIâm sorry. Bad timing. I saw yourââ
âNo.â You threw up both hands at once, suddenly out of breath and fucks to give, âYou know what? I donât care. You need to go. I have to be down at the courthouseââ
In twenty minutes. You cut yourself short and hurried off to find shoes. You could wear other pants. Ask another attorney to sign the forms if you couldnât reach your dad. Forget that his boss and yours had just caught you with the vibrator heâd bought you last month and try not to feel too humiliated knowing he knew what youâd been doing. It didnât matterâJoel didnât matter. You slid on a mismatched pair of slacks and set off toward the door.
Then you had to stop. Joel beat you there, quick as ever.
âListen. Hey.â
âWill you stop?!â
You pushed at his big and wet, stupidly broad chest. You felt the small grey hairs on his pecs tickle your palms, and for a second, you thought you heard a chuckle.
âYouâre gonna make me lateââ
âHey, hey,â Joel said again. Of course it sounded fatherly, âI already signed the POA for Morales, hon, youâre good.â
Youâre good.
âYou what?â You stared at him in disbelief. How did he even know you needed Frankieâs power of attorney signed in the first place? You figured your dad wouldâve mentioned it, but still, it wasnât really Joelâs form to sign.
âThe case is mine now,â he clarified, reading that look, âWasnât my first pick, but it is what it is. And your dadââ
Your dad was probably lagging wildly behind on his own caseload, so heâd pushed one off on his friend. Again.
âYou canât keep picking up his slack,â you gritted out, âOne of these days itâs gonna bite you both in the ass. You know he shouldnât be forcing these jobs on you.â
âI offered.â
âYou caved.â
âHeâs my best friend, what do you expect me to do?â
âNot let him use you! Heâs making you feel bad for him.â
âAnd what if I did? What if I did pity the bastard?â
You scoffed. Then winced, inwardly.
I donât need your pity, Mr. Miller.
From the look on Joelâs face, he seemed to be remembering the same. He shook his head.
âThatâs notâŠâ he trailed off. He rubbed his jaw with his hand and started to move from the door, deflating some.
His other arm extended to you, wordlessly, and already anticipated what was sure to follow. You swatted him off, then walked to the bed. You considered sitting but didnât. Instead, you crossed your arms like you always did and turned away, facing the window with a cool, flat affect.
By now, Joel knew better than to take that for what it seemed. He crossed the room to you, treading softly.
His voice turned gentle again, like an apology: âHoneyâŠâ
But your gaze was already fixed outside. You frowned.
âDarlinâ,â Joel continued, undeterred, âCome on.â
And you didnât need to see his face to hear the rest: âLook at me, please,â with eyes all comfort and warmth.
âDonât you have a phone call with an R.O. or something?â Briefly, you recalled Acacius and a stream of other items from the checklist youâd covered that morning, and you had to stop yourself then from straying too far. You blinked once, just as Joel was approaching from behind.
âI cancelled,â he said.
You sighed, âMr. MillerâŠâ
You knew he hated doing that.
âJoel,â he pressed. Adding, âSomething came up.â
You wouldnât even ask. You shouldnât care. You felt him standing there, fanning hot breaths across the nape of your neck, and you really couldnât have taken that worse. You visibly tensed, hands balling into fists at your sides, andâhell, he wouldnât quit moving now, would he?âJoel bent down. He hesitated, as if gauging your reaction in time, then descended further. He kissed your shoulder.
You cracked; it never took much from him.
For all your inane, ancillary plays at feigning indifference, one movement of Joelâs mouth and your resolve was lost. You clung to words, weakly, but all the rest fell away.
âWe donâtâŠwant your charity. Me or my dad. Alright?â
âI know.â
Joel kissed your skin again, then pulled at the strap of your blouse. It fell limply away, and his lips reattached.
Exactly when heâd walked you back to the bed, you couldnât be sure. By the third or fourth kiss, your stomach was tight, knees weak, and your eyes drawing closed; it didnât matter to you or to him what had passed before. Your bodies found the bed and blended together.
Tangling, in a way. Tearing blindly at clothes and not saying too much apart from Joelâs soft, sweet words:
âThatâs it.â
âI know.â
âGood girl.â
Good girl when he kissed you. Good girl when he stripped you bare. Good girl when his hands roamed the broad, naked expanse of your body and let your own do the same to him. Good girl when your fingers hooked the outline of the towel and tugged it away, your vision filled with a sight youâd come to like more and more each day.
âThatâs my girl,â Joel murmured. He cradled your head while you gripped his base, ââSâyours, baby. All yours.â
Yours. Mine. You werenât sure you had the sense or self-possession to even know what that meant, especially here. Joel wasnât a boyfriend. He wasnât a lover, at least not in the traditional sense. He wore dark wool suits like your father and worked from dawn until dusk every day, practicing law for longer than youâd been alive. Still, the smile above you was sweet. It coaxed you gently as you slid your hand up and down his length, like he sensed this was more like a lesson for you. Learning experience.
âRemember, spit a little first,â he instructed. Then, to demonstrate this point, he brought his fingers to his mouth and wet them quickly. He slipped his touch down to yours and met your gaze while he joined you there.
He rubbed and slicked himself up and he did it with ease. You followed his lead and watched his face contortâcrowâs feet pinching even tighter at the sides of his eyes as pleasure began to pool in his gut. He looked pretty. Youâd never thought to tell him this, but Joel really had an unparalleled face. It was an old and beautiful thing. For this reason, you couldnât bring yourself to tear your gaze away, maybe to wet your own fingers. Instead, you slipped your hand between your legs, where his hips had come to rest. You worked a slow, light touch against your folds; you were drenched, and it didnât take long for your fingers to be, too. You moved them back to Joelâs cock.
âLike this?â you ventured.
The man answered with a grunt, at first. Then a grin.
âYeah. Yeah,â Joel nodded, quiet but emphatic. Trying not to smile too big as he let your touch take over for his, âJust like that, sweet pea. Get it nice anâ wet for daddy.â
You wanted to whimper at that. Something mustâve flashed in your eyes at the intonation of the last word, and the look mustâve suffused your whole expression, because the next thing you knew, Joel was lowering his body to yours. Petting your hair, letting you rub on his shaft as fast as your soft, lithe hands could manage.
âFeel that, baby? Feel how much daddy missed you?â
You did.
Your brow pinched, and you wanted more of that. More from him: those tender, edifying words of praise being mumbled your way while your touch worked him over. Maybe you couldâve helped it, but then again, in this state, maybe you couldnâtâyou whimpered for him.
Wriggling your hips against the bed to get your warmth pressed flush with his own, and squeezing him tighter:
âIn me, daddy. Please.â
You angled his cock in your trembling grip to plead as much. You knew he liked being the one to push in the first time, so you didnât move too far with that push, but you begged him with your gaze. You felt him tense a bit.
And just when you sensed he might let you have your way, he moved off. Down. Sliding his torso away from your own, to go lower on the bed, and smirking again.
âI think she needs my tongue first, doesnât she?â
You wanted to nod. Instead, you flinched. You crawled away from his hold before it could secure itself firmly on either one of your legs, and you had to snag your bottom lip between your teeth to contain that blossoming need. It almost spilled from your mouth in a moan before Joelâs could reach your lower half. Then you scrambled to sit up
âNo,â you choked out.
This wasnât new. While you shook your head, Joel lifted a brow and stood from the bed. He reached behind him.
The night stand.
You closed your eyes.
âThis isnâtâŠsupposed to be for me.â you sighed.
In a second, Joel was back where he started, and you didnât have to steal a glance through your lids to know what he was holding. Slotting himself gently into place.
âDonât,â he started, sharp, ââsay that. I mean it.â
You knew he meant it, but you also knew better than to accept at face value what he said, moving down on you.
This wasnât part of the deal. Joelâs money was meant to serve his pleasure, not yours. Letting him take you any other way seemed to blur the lines between transaction and affection, and though youâd done this before, it still didnât feel right. You couldnât bear having his focus here.
Evidently, though, he could. Heâd snatched your vibrator from the night table and lowered his torso to your legs, lips twitching the tiniest bit. âOpen up. Let me see her.â
Joel was on his stomach, eyes glowing with intrigue.
âLet me see how much sheâs missed me, baby.â
The grey matter in your brain mightâve trickled through your earsâthe whole thing went to mush at his words. You pushed at his hands, then the top of his head, but clearly, your will was weak. You wanted this. Needed it.
âThatâs a good girl. Let daddy have it,â Joel drawled.
You wanted to cry. Or maybe hide. His index and middle fingers prodded at your folds, pulling them apart, and for a moment, you couldâve sworn youâd stopped breathing. Joel kissed the slope of your mound with a quiet kind of reverence. The salt-and-pepper stubble on his chin brushed your clit, and your back arched reflexively. Then, remembering why youâd come to this arrangement in the first place, you felt a wave of guilt supplant that pleasure.
You clawed at his head and shook your own, weakly.
âNo. W-wanna make you feel good,â you choked out.
Not me.
Not here.
Just let itâ
âFuck,â you keened through your teeth. Joelâs lips made contact with your slick, drooling cunt and, in a second, sucked your nub in between them. He flicked his tongue.
Joel groaned, then pulled away to meet your gaze.
âFeels plenty good fâme,â he assured you in a murmur. Eyes glossy, âSheâs so fuckinâ sweet, honey. So pretty.â
Then, as if to punctuate his point, he slid his tongue down the whole wet mess of your slit, and he moaned. He curled the muscle and invaded your sticky, sensitive, precious warm flesh with vigor and forceâmaybe a little desperationâand you whined at the feeling. Your toes curled tight. It was doubtlessly a sight to see: Joelâs old and weathered head against your young and supple skin, the wiry greys of his chin rubbing your cunt like no manâs his age shouldâve been. He took you gently. Forked his fingers over your folds to hold you open for him and then, over and over and over again, just licking stripes. Squelching noises only seemed to goad him on while he buried his nose and savored your taste without reserve. Your stomach clenched with that pleasure, then swelled.
âThatâs my girlâso good for me,â Joel said, as though reminding you, gently, it was okay to relish the feeling.
Once more, he suckled your clit in his mouth, rubbing the tip of his tongue in a quick back-and-forth motion, and the next sensation hit without a breath of warning.
Your belly twisted again, then flushed with hot pleasure.
âMyâ fuck,â you cried, shuddering with a climax you didnât know was coming. You held his head and whined.
Joelâs tongue didnât stop. Your vision blurred. Whatever reprieve you mightâve hoped to find came in the form of his lips drawing back, momentarily, only to sponge little kisses on your still-pulsing heat. Your body jolted back.
âI câ Iâm done. Iâm done,â you blurted out.
Joel nodded against you. Humming through his kisses:
âI know. Keep going.â
Keep going.
So simple.
Still, you couldnât breathe. Your sight was inundated with stars. You felt Joelâs stubble on your slit again, only this time, the pleasure was tripled. Your legs trembled, and your hands made fists in his hair. Joel kept on kissing.
And kissed again, again, and again, until your fingers in his locks pulled taut to the roots and your hips were bucking up in his face: âToo much, tâoh fuckfuckfuck.â
Then came a buzz. Skirting your legs in a blink, before diving to meet Joelâs mouth on your clit. You shrieked.
âI know, I know,â Joel joined, as though soothing a wound while he maneuvered the vibrator. Lifting his head and then kissing your thigh, âI know. Youâre alright.â
You wanted to sob; you felt ready to burst. You trusted Joelâs judgment but had never been subjected to this sort of pleasure. What if it was more than you could take?
âIâm here.â
Joelâs words were slow to crawl off his tongue, but their intent was clear. You writhed once more, and he was kissing your skin, rubbing your thighs, and taking the toy to your clit with a warm, devoted touch. He wasnât cruel.
He had a glint in his gaze when you met it, like he knew you wouldnât accept this feeling aloneâbut he wanted you to. He wanted the indulgence to be your own and an end in itself. There was care in his touch, tender praise with every caress, and you guessed this was intentional. Joel needed you to know this was more than only his.
You felt more naked than youâd ever been: soaking the sheets with your last release, fresh arousal trickling out, Joelâs spit mixing with your nectar and sweat and pressing you down in the bed. And nudging you, gently.
ââSâokay, baby. Youâre alright. That feels nice, doesnât iââ
âKiss me.â
It came out faster than you could even try and stop it. You werenât sure why you said it. The words were acerbic on your tongueâyou hated ever sounding needyâbut then your mind and your mouth and your worries were all silenced at once when Joel came clambering up for you.
His lips were wet and grinning as he kissed you. He held the vibrator hostage between your legs while his body pressed tight against yours. His movements slowed.
Then, as if heâd crawled in your head and read your mind:
âItâs okay to need me, baby. Itâs okay to want this.â
His hips made that assurance even clearer. Joel reached down and took the vibrator again, increasing the friction between your groin and his while he pressed the buzzing toy to your clit. You whined into his mouth at the feeling.
Your eyes rolled back, and the pleasure soared. This morning, you mightâve bristled at the words heâd just spoken, but here, in this bed, it felt okay. It felt safe.
Joel felt safe, for once, and you werenât sure how to keep that idea from stickingâhow to reconcile the notion of swapping sex for cash with a man for months on end, and then this. Your stomach churned. He held your face and kissed you more, and your clit throbbed and ached. Before you could ponder your thoughts a second longer, a white-hot pleasure washed over, and you came again.
âGood girl,â Joel cooed.
Throbbing even more this time.
âThatâs a sweet girl. Thatâs my baby.â
All but aching with desire. Feeling it double.
âCum for daddy, thatâs it. Keep going.â
Feeling it trickle down your legs.
âSheâs feelinâ real good, huh?â
You could barely breathe.
You whined. Felt something splinter between your thighs and then more of it, more of you and that slick, oozing pleasure and Joelâs groans, overjoyedââMaking a fucking messâa daddy, isnât she? She feel that good?ââand by âthat goodâ you guessed it was more than normal.
This was more warmth than usual. Somewhere in the midst of your own mind-numbing pleasure, youâd let out a spurt, sticky and wet. It now coated the hairs on Joelâs tummy, and while his skin shone, his eyes were brighter. He flitted a look to you, gaze flaring, and slid down. Low.
Back to where he was before. Moving the buzzing pink bullet aside and letting his mouth assume its place.
Of course, you yelped.
âJoel!â
You winced, both from saying his name and feeling so raw. Joel grinned at the sound and suckled your clit.
It was drenched. You and Joel, too, were doused all over and practically gleaming under the rays of late afternoon sun then pouring through the window. For a second, you cast a look outside like you had before, but it was only to brace your body for the bliss at hand. You stared and felt a crude, carnal shockwave seize you head to toe. It traveled fast and made you release, again, or else just continue the same flow as beforeâand this time, into Joelâs waiting mouth. He lapped at you feverishly now.
He squeezed your legs and licked you dry. He worked in merciless circles, like his life might have depended on making you stay at this peak. All the while, you were tearing at his hair. Riding his face as your body fell apart.
That was alright. This pleasure was yours for now, but there was still time yet to make it worth his while, you reasoned in a half-intoxicated state. Your legs vibrated as you started to crawlâlimpâback up in the bed and, numb with elation and a desperate need to please, you stretched your arm toward the night stand. You huffed.
You reached blindly but got it. The box. Weak fingers found the first plastic strip and tore yourself a square. Then, lifting it to Joel, you ignored the last stabs of pleasure between your legs. This was fun, but still his.
âGo on,â you told him, breathless, âFuck me.â
Joel quirked a brow. He took the condom, still panting himself. He brought the latex to his tip out of habit, then:
âYeah? Are you sure?â
âUh-huh.â
Your head was swimming. Somewhere entrenched in the furthest recesses of your brain you could feel it, that dizzying, self-centered pleasure. You pushed it back.
You suffocated it, and you spread your legs wide for him. You let him lay you down and tug the rubber over his cock, then nudge at your hips to situate himself in just the right way. How he liked it. He seemed to be content, and your heart swelled. In this airy, buoyant state, you felt more at ease to speak, sure that heâd understand.
âThis should cover some of it, right?â you panted out.
Joel slowed.
âWhat?â
You sucked your bottom lip between your teeth, eager to keep going. But you steeled yourself, just barely, then.
âSex. Now,â you said, âItâll cover some of my car repairs.â
Instead of nodding like youâd expected, Joel only blinked. Then you opened your mouth to speak again, and his body stopped you cold. He planted a hand beside your head on the pillow and raised his hips; you felt his heat leave with it. You reached for his backside immediately, to try and pull him back into that pre-missionary position heâd held, when Joel brushed you off. His face was hard.
âMoney?â he quipped.
âYeah,â you started, then remembered how you talked outside of the bedroom, when he seemed more serious, âWeâll go again. All week. You can even put it in myââ
Joel balked, like youâd just slapped him across the face.
âNo,â he said, sharp.
âNo,â he repeated, more to himself this second time. Almost as though he couldnât believe what you were suggestingâand making him guilty by association.
Joel clenched your pillow like a vice and shook his head.
âYouâre not getting paid for this,â he finished, and when your gaze penetrated his, confused, he squeezed harder.
âThought you wanted it.â Joel added, almost shamefully.
âI do! I doâŠI justââ you sputtered.
âWhat? Think you need to offer up a week and a half of fucking to make it worth my time? Is that what this is?â
Well, in a way, maybe.
You werenât sure what to say. Former dizzying bliss was dwindling fast, and now you were facing him cold. Sober.
Increasingly irritated, again.
âI just need money, Mr. Millerââ
âItâs Joel, hon,â he bit back, for the fourth time that day. His eyes flared with something more, maybe annoyance, but then he was tempering it just as fast. He ran a hand through his damp grey hair and shook his head, pausing, âItâs Joel. I know you need the money, baby, but itâsââ
âItâs what we agreed,â you protested, âWhat I needââ
âWell itâs not what I want!â Joel barked.
Anger surged again, and this time, evidently, the feeling was harder to keep at bay. He was scarcely able to rein in his features, settling on a grave little scowl instead of a frown, and he sucked in shorter, shallower breaths through his nose. You felt him let your pillow go.
âForget itâthe cash.â Joel grit his teeth even tighter, âForget these payments and the goddamn allowance Iâve had you on. I canât do that anymore. Itâs not right.â
Your heart sank.
You didnât know what to say.
Luckily, Joelâs voice resumed on its own.
âWhatever you want, whatever you need, sweetheartâŠâ
He stopped. Silence followed, then stretched on for one full, terrible minute. In that interim, you could see his chest rise and fall fast. He was trying to slow it down.
âWhatever you need paid off, Iâll do it. Anything. You donât have to touch me again. It was wrong of me to allow that in the first place,â he rejoined, tone cooling.
Sounding guilty, too.
Above you, Joel didnât seem keen on holding your gaze, so he fixed his stare someplace on the headboard instead. Then he moved off your body, slowly.
In spite of the distance he attempted to give, he was still crowding your space. Looming large and bare and weary as youâd ever seen him, knees shuffling back awkwardly through a mass of cotton sheets while his eyes shifted low. Away. The rest of him filled your lungs with a heady cologne scent and your stomach with a thousand tiny bladesâyou were hurt that he wasnât sticking to his end of the bargain. You were mad that he was trying to claim the moral high ground now, after everything youâd done.
Mostly, though, you were just upset that you felt like you were losing someone close. That Joel Miller was more of a confidant, friend, and father figure than your own dad had ever been, and that got all fucked up over money. Your lips pursed, and something stung behind your eyes when you reached for him again. Your throat stung, too.
âThe reason I agreed to do this,â Joel went on, and the ache in your head worsened when he winced from your touch, âwas âcause I didnât want you getting âhelpâ from anyone else. I was selfish. And thatâs not an excuseâŠâ
He started to move off, hand dropping from yours.
ââŠbut itâs the truth. Iâm sorry.â
At length, Joel found your gaze, and the eyes said it all over again: Iâm sorry. You mightâve believed them, too.
But you were you, and you couldnât help but press:
âWhy?â
Your voice was small. Joel was trying to stand from the bed, but you grabbed at his hand again and made him meet your eyes. Confusion was painted across his own.
Kneeling in front of him, curious, you tried to clarify.
âWhyâd it have to be you?â
Judging from Joelâs expression as soon as you did, you got the sense that this question made him feel dumb. He frowned, but he held your stare and answered anyway.
âBecause I wanted you first,â he replied, âBefore all this.â
Your stomach twisted. He did?
You didnât need to ask twice to know what that meant. What heâd said, in words and with a look, was enough. Still, it was always in you to know more, to be sure, so you crept a little closer. You let your hands roam up andâ
âNo,â Joel said, as soon as your fingers reached his side.
Youâd just wanted to feel him, maybe prod him further on what heâd just said through acts that didnât require verbal articulation, but he refused. He backed up in bed.
âThis isnât aboutââ he started, low.
âSex. I know,â you answered for him. Then your touch grazed his thigh, and you were dying to have more. To be told in a way you both knew and understood. To touch, âYou want me to believe you reallyâŠliked me before?â
âMore than you know.â
There was that blunt, open pragmatism in the Joel youâd always known. Perhaps guided by natural inclinations, or else your hand on his leg, drawing higher. Moving closer.
Showing skepticism through your eyes and the hint of a playful, disbelieving smile starting to curl at your lips.
âWhen you met me?â you teased.
Youâd known of Joel for years, and had met him a couple times as a teenager at various firm holiday functions. You probably hadnât exchanged more than ten words altogether before starting law school a few years back.
âHell no,â Joel answered, fast, âWhen you started work.â
His gaze was timid again. It was fixed on his thigh where youâd started to slide your index up the warm, muscled expanse of his skin, and though you could tell he was more than hesitant, you wanted to know. Wanted to feel.
It wasnât so easy convincing a man youâd been working forâand fucking, largely without feelingâto pay bills that you wanted him here and now. But you needed to try.
That maybe, somewhere along the way, youâd come to want him, too. That cash wasnât the only thing at stake.
You crawled between his legs, then straddled his hips.
Your lips smiling still as you did: âHow much?â
Joel blinked back. Dazed.
âWhat do you mââ
âHow much did you like me? When did it start?â
Joel sighed when your heat rubbed his. He tried grabbing ahold of your hips, when you glanced down and saw heâd already discarded the last condom. You couldnât have that if you wanted to continue this talk.
You reached back and grabbed another.
âDarlinâ,â Joel said, strained, âWe shouldnâtâŠâ
âSays who?â
Youâd already worked the rubber halfway down his length when his heavy-lidded gaze locked with yours. You saw lust there, mixed with worry. Curiosity. You kept going.
âSays your dad, if he ever finds out what Iâve done to his little girl,â Joel replied, closing his eyes at the feeling.
You had the latex worked down to the base of him when you smiled. Felt him seize your hips, lids fluttering open to find you in their soft, glossy stare, and you felt better. Like clockwork, you went together and joined, at last. You felt Joel squeeze your backside and groan when you first sank down to take him whole. You shuddered, too.
But you tried to steady your voice as you spoke.
âSemantics, Miller,â you told him, only faltering a little, âThings you are âdoingâ to his little girl. Not just âdone.ââ
There, you had a point. Surely your father would have had some choice words for his business partner and best friend if he knew how far Joelâs cock was currently stuffed inside your tight, wet cunt. It might even piss him off, if he werenât too drunk to receive the news himself.
Joel blinked hard, signaling that he knew this too, and presently watched your body swallow all eight inches at once, after youâd raised yourself up to just the tip and sank back. Your ass fell to his groin with an obscene sort of squelch, and your walls involuntarily clenched. You both let out sounds of pleasure, and held on tighter.
Your hands on his chest for stability, while one of his own held your hip and the other fumbled around for your clit, gliding through the sheen of your arousal on his front. You rocked your hips and felt how much it really wasâhow youâd drenched his whole abdomen with your last release. You smiled at this and stared, pleased with the pretty, sticky display youâd laid bare all over Joelâs belly.
When Joel wasnât watching you ride, he stared there too.
âNot so âlittleâ anymore,â he mused quietly. Then he looked up to find your eyes, seeing them as glazed as his, âAnd I âlikeâ you, hon. Present tense. Not justâŠâliked.ââ
Alright.
âHow much?â
You wanted to say it with some confidence. Nonchalance. Then Joelâs cock nicked a particularly sensitive ridge inside your walls, and that thought was gone as quick as it had come. You gripped the flesh of his upper chest and rolled your hips harder. Let out your breaths in little fractured whimpers while you rode him more. Another sweet feeling twisted low in your gut.
With just a glimpse of that, Joel moved his hand from your heat up past your hips and waist, to squeeze one of your breasts. His fingers were wet. You could feel them, equal parts warmth and wanton yearning as the pads pinched your nipple and gave it a firm tug. He grunted.
Clearly, there was more to it than just the touching and feeling for himâJoelâs eyes drank in the sight of your skin as it glistened with the arousal heâd just smeared. He thumbed at the wet, stiff peak and swallowed. And, just as you were about to adjust the rhythm of your hips bouncing on him, his free hand joined the first and pulled you down. You cried feeling his cock wedge deep; your hands fell to either side of his body when he yanked your face down to his. He fucked up into you from underneath
You squealed, soft, âJoel!â
He kissed your open mouth. Made you lay flat overtop him while he fucked your dripping hole. You whimpered.
âJoelââ Again.
âI like you so much, sweetheart,â he said, in answer to your last question, lips close, âDoes she like me too?â
As if to save him the trouble of a swift reply in words, your body told him instead. You squeezed around his cock, and with another desperate cry, bit his shoulder. He hammered your poor, aching pussy with a groan of his own, and he held your body down to his. Grinning.
Kissing the side of your head while he pounded away. Stroking your hair, âIs that a âyesâ? She like her daddy?â
Drool was bound to slip out of your mouth any second. Your lips were locked in a permanent âoâ while he drilled from under you on the bed. Still, you managed to nod.
âUh-huhâoh, fuck, fuck, da-ddy. Yes, daddy.â
You squeezed your eyes shut as another blistering wave seared your insides. Joel was relentless with his thrusts now, driving himself in and out without stopping or slowing. He mustâve known you were close. He was too, judging by the sounds of his grunts and hushed tone.
âLet daddy take care of her then, baby. All of her. OK?â
His words trickled through your ear as sweet as honey. His cock was less kind, but that was okayâyou liked it.
You loved him here. Taking care of you. Her. Everything.
And, in this half-coherent state of fuckdrunk pleasure, you were tempted to give in to whatever he begged.
It would be so easy. Joel cradled your face in his hand, practically beaming with pride while he fucked you over and over, and your legs were spread, walls were stretched, eyes practically rolling back, and you felt more secure than youâd been in ages. Joel could care for you.
He rubbed his thumb over your cheek and hummed.
âDaddyâs got you,â he said, voice all warm assurance.
Nudging you closer and closer to your peakâand perhaps some other form of surrender. Release.
Submission?
Joel wouldnât be so bad for that.
He could fuck you well and leave you content. Make you forget what it meant to be strapped for cash and saddled with guilt and worry over bills every month. Joel could provide, for now. His eyes said as much; his fingers threaded through your hair and rubbed your scalp. He cupped your face, all fifty-six years in his own looking as handsome as theyâd ever been. He felt good. He felt safe.
You were hot. Your legs trembled and ached.
âIs that something youâd want?â he pressed.
And, still holding Joelâs gaze with a heavy-lidded, fucked out look of your own, you surprised yourself by nodding, slowly. Your body was spent, but the curve on your lips, then his, was sincere; Joel nodded back as he grinned.
âYeah? You mean it, sweetheart?â
He flipped you both over and got on top, never breaking apart. You wound your legs around his back and let him cup your cheeks again, and from this angle, you felt it. You wouldnât try and fight it now; you just kissed him.
Then you came for a third time, walls clenching and squeezing and gushing again, smearing Joelâs front as he fucked you right through it. His groans were a little more subdued than yours, but in their timbre, you could hear his desperation. He emptied himself inside you, in the condom, and kept holding your face all the while.
You felt a low pulse between your legs. Then another. And another. And another. Joelâs hips began to still, his hefty greying belly bumping lightly against your skin while he drained what was left in his balls, and you swore that his bones mightâve creaked from the sheer force of those final thrusts. He seemed exhausted. Somehow, though, the man looked even better in this stateâhaggard and worn as he was, the face above your own was soft. Smiling, faintly, and kissing you constantly.
You couldnât pretend you didnât enjoy it; you were far too tired and fucked out of your mind to protest right now.
Joel trailed a path with his lips from your chin to your ear. He kissed the hinge of your jaw and sank himself deeper.
âMr.ââ But you caught yourself, shortly, ââŠJoel.â
He lifted his head, not apologetic in the least.
âMaybe just one moreââ he started.
âNo,â you finished for him, sharp.
Still smiling, but with your eyes on him in a thinly veiled threat. Joel accepted that and kept his dick where it was.
What followed was gradual but natural enough. A little awkward as you broached that uncharted territory of remaining in the otherâs presence after the deed was done, but Joel didnât seem like he wanted to leave the bed, and you had nowhere else to go until dinner with your dad at eight. There was a moment you wanted to separate your body from Joelâs, if only to slip off to the bathroom by yourself, but the man just held you closer.
âYou think your old man will mind if I joined tonight?â
Here the fuck we go.
âHeâll kill you.â
You pushed hard against his hold without getting so much as an inch of give. Joel had to fight back a chuckle.
âOh, yeah? Why?â
âBecause,â you began in a huff. Wriggling with very little success in his arms, while you were pinned in missionary, âI smell like you. You smell like me. My dadâs a drunk, but he can sniff stuff like that out in a heartbeat. Too risky.â
You punctuated those words with a still more serious look, but before you could nudge at his chest again or say something more, you were forced to swallow a scream. Joelâs grip tightened even more, and he moved to stand up from the bedïżœïżœïżœwith you still in his arms and impaled on his cock. He started to walk to the bathroom.
âGreat. Showerâs got plenty of room for the two of us.â
âJoel!â
âGlad I donât have to keep reminding you of my name.â
His voice was smug. Your gaze was hard. Joel was still hard himself, amazingly, and you almost groaned when you felt the head of his cock bump somewhere soft and sensitive inside. He toted you into the big, bright room.
âIf not tonight, how âbout tomorrow? Just you and me.â
He would never stop this shit. He reached for the faucet.
âStill too dangerous. You know that,â you chided. Your resolve only wavered a little when you felt the hot water start to pelt at your back. Joel closed the glass door, âBesidesâŠI need to focus on figuring my shit out right now. Work and bills and getting myself a rental car soon.â
Joel paused. He turned, still holding you.
Then, just as swiftly as heâd stepped inside, he carried you right back out of the shower. You whined in protest.
He took you over to the bed and set you down. He left to find his wallet and keys. You mightâve been tempted to voice your displeasure in some other wayânamely, by marching back to the bathroom, locking the door, and bathing aloneâbut before you could speak a word, Joel was back. He looked down at you and held out his fist.
âWhatâsââ
âYour dad and meâll be up to our eyeballs in bullshit working the Garcia audit tomorrowâand I know you donât want him seeing us leave together anywhereâso we can meet at Bohananâs at six. How does that sound?â
You blinked.
âI donâtâŠhave a car.â
Joel opened his hand. Keys dropped out.
In a single glance, you could see they werenât his.
Joel drove a garish Super Duty F-450, not an Audi. The cogs were quick to turn in your head, but clearly not fast enough, because Joel was closing your fingers over the keys before you could breathe so much as a syllable to him. When you did, it came out more like a stutter. Palpably mad but far too rattled to get much out:
âJoel, I-I canâtââ
âIâve been meaning to buy one anywââ
âYouâre insane,â you started to push the keys back, and for some reason, your heart was thudding extra hard as you did. You went on, unblinking, âYou donâtâŠneed to.â
âI want to.â
Joelâs hands were warm when he pressed both of his palms to secure yours between them. He could probably feel the way it shook a little, but he didnât seem to care. His gaze was too busy trying to find, and hold, your own while you swallowed and stared and racked your numb brain for any words of defiance. At length, nothing came.
All you could do was meet that look. In the soft brown irises above, you could see it allâthe need to comfort, and care, and provide where he could, offer better than the hand youâd been dealt and maybe, interspersed with those feelings somewhere, a simpler need in him to give.
For once, you wanted to believe it.
Fun fact: This fic was inspired by true eventsâŒïžđŻ My life đ«đ€Șđ€đ Like reader, my truck is also busted as SHIT and needs $2,700 in repairs!!!! Unlike reader, I will not be sucking and fucking Joel Miller to recoup my losses (not asking for donations, just wanted to give yâall a giggle at my misfortune LOL)
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#ENOUGH BULLSHITTING WE NEED MORE GLUCOSE GUARDIAN JOEL ON THE TL NEOWWWWW#đ«”đŒđ#iâm begging yâall to write more for this very particular and off-putting dynamic bc i love it dearly#joel miller smut#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller imagine#joel miller one shot#joel miller tlou#the last of us fic
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Can u do one abt Sae Itoshi being a girl dad?đ„č
AYAYYYA when I saw that I had to make this request immediately + Nagi and Rin are with you!
Bllk Boys If they become a girl father
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Sae Itoshi
Sae wakes up early in the morning to help his daughter get ready for kindergarten. Normally calm and reserved, Sae doesnât complain when his daughter insists on putting a âprincess crownâ on his head while heâs combing her hair. Seeing himself in the mirror wearing a pink crown, he smirks slightly and says:
âDoesnât this make me too cool?â His daughter, with a serious expression responds âNo Papa, itâs just perfect!â
On the way to school, his daughter bombards him with questions like, âWhatâs your favorite color, Papa?â Sae, instead of his usual short answers, takes a moment to think and says, âMaybe blue⊠but your favorite colors might be betterâ
Sweet Details:
Saeâs daughter proudly tells her friends, âMy dad is the best football player in the world!â Even though Sae tries to stay composed, her admiration secretly makes him incredibly happy
While teaching his daughter how to play football, she somehow manages to dribble past him and score a goal. Sae quietly mumbles âMust be the genesâ but deep down, he feels proud beyond words
His daughter loves drawing pictures for him. One day, Sae takes one of her drawings and puts it in his sports bag. Before an important match, he looks at it for motivation.
At night, Sae softly hums a traditional Japanese lullaby to his daughter as she falls asleep. Itâs one of the few moments where his stoic exterior melts into pure warmth and love
Nagi Seishiro
Nagi plans to spend his weekend morning sleeping in, but he wakes up to his daughter poking his cheek with her tiny hands
âDaaaad! Wake up! We need to have breakfast and play!â she says with boundless energy. Nagi groans and mutters âUgh⊠five more minutesâŠâ
But when his daughter furrows her brows and sternly replies, âFive minutes? No way, now!â he canât help but smile. âAlright, alright you winâ he says, picking her up and carrying her on his shoulder as they head to the kitchen
Despite Nagiâs lazy tendencies, his daughterâs energy and demands always win him over. Sometimes, he even finds himself unexpectedly having fun while playing with her
Sweet Details:
Nagiâs daughter might be hyperactive, curious, and constantly looking for things to do. Although it clashes with his laid-back personality, Nagi learns to adapt and becomes more active because of her
Nagiâs idea of a âdaddy-daughter dayâ often includes binge-watching cartoons, ordering pizza, and him trying (and failing) to braid her hair. While heâs not the best at hairstyling, heâll do anything to make her laugh
Nagi easily gets drawn into her imaginative world. Whether itâs pretending to be a king, a monster, or a hero saving her, he goes along with it. Afterward, though, heâll collapse on the couch and say âThat was exhaustingâŠâ
His daughter loves to challenge her dad, saying things like âLetâs race! If I win, you have to buy me ice cream!â Nagi reluctantly agrees and usually lets her win. But sometimes, his competitive side sneaks in, and he plays seriously
Despite his lazy nature, Nagi is fiercely protective of his daughter. Just the thought of her getting hurt makes him unexpectedly serious and determined to keep her safe
Rin Itoshi
One evening, Rin comes home from training, exhausted. As he opens the door, he hears a small voice shout
âDaddyyyy!â
His daughter runs up to him with bright eyes and says, âLetâs play soccer Daddy!â Rin looks at her, a bit startled, and replies
âAt this hour? You have school tomorrow, young lady.â But when she pouts, he sighs and gives in, saying âFine, but only for five minutesâ
Before he knows it, theyâre out in the yard playing. She manages to dribble the ball and score between his legs. As she jumps and cheers, Rin smirks slightly and says,
âI guess we shouldnât tell your mom we played this lateâ
Sweet Details:
Rin tries to be the âperfect dadâ and takes everything very seriously. He wants to provide the best environment for his daughter. However, whenever she hugs him and says âYouâre the best dad ever!â his stern exterior softens
Rin teaches his daughter how to play soccer but never pressures her. Instead, he encourages her to enjoy the game at her own pace. One day, when she pulls off a tricky move, he mutters to himself
âMust be the genesâ
Rin is extremely protective of his daughter. If someone bothers her at school or hurts her feelings, Rin steps in immediatelyâthough he tries to handle things calmly and rationally
At night, Rin often tells his daughter bedtime stories about famous soccer players. At the end of every story, she snuggles up to him and says âBut youâre the best one Daddyâ For Rin, itâs the highlight of his day
Princess not: Rin affectionately calls her âMy Little Lionâ because sheâs just as determined and stubborn as he is
Enjoy!
#bllk fluff#bllk#bllk x you#bllk x reader#blue lock x y/n#blue lock x you#bluelock x reader#blue lock x reader#bluelock x you#blue lock x female reader#itoshi sae#bllk sae#sae x reader#itoshi sae x reader#sae itoshi x reader#sae itoshi#nagi x reader#nagi seishiro smut#nagi x you#nagi seishiro x reader#nagi seishiro#nagi smut#rin itoshi x you#rin itoshi x reader#rin x reader#rin itoshi#itoshi rin#itoshi rin x reader#bllk nagi#bllk rin
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Hey! I love your Theo fics and I was wondering if I could request a Theo x Hufflepuff, granddaughter of Newt Scamander reader? I think it could be cute!
Maybe he notices her one day minding her business, and one of his friends calls her weird for the same reasons Newt was called weird in school? Whatever you like! thank you!
Weird
Theo Nott x Hufflepuff!reader
wc: 950
a/n: Sorry this took so long! Hope itâs ok.
Requests open
Theo was in the library with his friends. He wasnât doing any work of course because he was distracted talking with his friends. They were talking about the quidditch match that took place yesterday.
Theo quickly glanced around the library and his eyes landed on you. You were sitting there reading minding your own business. Theo thought you were pretty. He admired your beauty. He thought you were so cute and loved how you werenât bothered by others.
Draco caught sight of Theo looking at you. He decided to speak up. âYou know thatâs Y/L/N, sheâs weird. She talks to animals and what not. Iâd stay away from her if I were you,â Draco warned.
âMaybe sheâs just misunderstood,â Theo reasoned.
âNah mate iâd listen to Draco, sheâs a freak,â Blaise commented.
âYou guys are mean,â Theo responded.
âTrust us, we would never steer you wrong,â Draco threw an arm around Theo.
âOk ok I get it,â Theo put a stop to their conversation.
âWe are just looking out for you,â Draco explained.
âYeah yeah i know, letâs drop it please.â Theo grumbled.
Theo and his friends continued hanging out in the library for a little while longer. Theo however was busy thinking about you. He couldnât get you off his mind. You intrigued him.
After Theoâs friends left he decided to go up and talk to you, despite what his friends told him. You were minding your own business, reading your book.
âMind of I sit here?â Theo asked.
âUm sure go head,â you replied. You were shy and a little nervous but he seemed nice.
âYouâre really pretty you know that,â Theo charmed.
You blushed at his words. You didnât think anyone noticed you.
âWhatâs your name?â you asked.
âTheo,â he said with a smile.
âIâm Y/N.â You stuck your hand out for him to shake, which he did.
âIâve seen you around school, Iâve always wanted to say hi,â Theo began.
âWhy didnât you?â
âI was always too nervous, and now I just thought hey, itâs worth a shot.â
âWell Iâm glad you did,â you answered.
âMe too.â
âSo what are you reading?â Theo asked.
âOh this? Iâm just reading about the care of magical creatures.â
âInteresting!â
âReally? Cause I find it fascinating.â
And maybe it was the way your eyes lit up or the smile on your face but Theo could have sworn he died and gone to heaven. You were simply stunning and so lively. He liked to look at you when there was a spark of joy in you.
âForgive me if this is too forward, but would you like to have a picnic at the black lake with me tomorrow?â Theo requested.
âIâd love too!â
âGreat!â
ââââââ
Tomorrow came fast. Theo couldnât wait he was so excited to see you again. He planned out the whole thing. He brought a ton of food and he even got you flowers.
When you arrived at the black lake Theo gave you the flowers.
âThese are beautiful, thank you!â
The two of you sat down on the picnic blanket, and Theo started to serve the food. What Theoâs friends might think if they saw him here with you was in the back of his mind, but he tried to ignore it and enjoy this time with you.
âAnything for you.â
You smiled at him, feeling really good about going out with Theo. He seemed really nice and you were excited to get to know him.
After the both of you ate you decided to just enjoy each otherâs presence and talk.
âSo what do you do on days you donât have class?â Theo asked.
âWell I like to read, sometimes I go on walks around the castle. Then thereâs spending time with my cat. I also like to draw. What about you?â You answered.
âThatâs interesting! I usually hang out with my friends. Iâd love to see your drawings sometime!â
âReally? Iâm not that good,â you shrugged.
âI bet you are,â Theo implied.
You smiled at him. âMaybe someday.â
âWhat do you read about?â
âMostly animals.â
âYou really like animals donât you.â
âWell my grandfather is Newt Scamander.â
âReally? No way.â Theo was impressed.
âYep.â
âThat makes a lot of sense.â
âHahaha.â
âHave you ever gone swimming in the black lake?â Theo asked.
âNo I havenât,â you replied.
âDo you want to swim with me?â Theo grinned.
âAre you crazy?!â
âCome on,â Theo said lifting his shirt over his head.
You laughed at him. You were a little shy but you quickly stripped down to your underwear, ripping it off like a bandaid.
Theo did his best to avert his eyes from your body. You were breathtaking and he just couldnât help it.
âLast one in is a sweaty oaf.â Theo called out.
You squealed as you jumped into the lake. The water was cold and it felt refreshing. You swam over to Theo.
Theo watched as droplets of water fell from your lashes. Theo went and held your waist.
âIs this ok?â Theo asked.
You nodded.
One hand came and brushed your hair out of you face then rested on your cheek.
âCan I kiss you?â
âYes.â You replied.
Theo placed his lips on yours in a heated kiss. His mouth explored yours. Your lips were moving in sync. When the need for air became to strong you pulled away.
âYou are a really good kisser,â Theo complemented.
You giggled, âThank you.â
Theo was quickly falling in love, and he didnât even know it yet. The last thing on his mind was what his friends would think. He couldnât care less about their opinion because he found someone he enjoyed spending time with.
#theodore nott#theo nott#theodore nott x reader#harry potter fanfiction#theo nott x reader#theo nott fluff#theodore nott fluff#theo nott x fem!reader#hp universe#theodore nott x y/n#theodore nott x you#theodore nott imagine#theo nott imagine#slytherin boys x reader#slytherin boys imagine#slytherin boys#theodore nott fanfiction#theodore nott oneshot#theodore nott scenarios#theodore nott fic#harry potter x reader#harry potter fanfic#harry potter#theodore nott one shot#slytherin boys fanfiction#theo nott fanfic#theo nott x y/n#theo nott x you#slytherin#theodore nott scenario
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you and all of your new perspective
for @steddiesongfics using 'new perspective' by noah kahan
also on ao3
rated m | 3,513 words | no cw | tags: rock star eddie munson, good uncle wayne munson, mutual pining, yearning, post-vecna, love confessions, idiots in love, first kiss, implied sexual content, getting together
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Heâs looking down at the letter and wondering how the hell heâs supposed to be normal about Eddie visiting him.
In Hawkins.
Where Eddie swore heâd never come back to the moment he got his ticket out of here.
âStarinâ at it ainât gonna make him not come,â Wayne says from across the counter. âSurprised he didnât call ya to tell ya.â
âHeâŠhe left a few messages,â Steve explains, setting the letter down and resting his face in his hands. âI just figured he wouldnât come if I didnât call him back.â
Wayne raises a brow, gives him a look that Steveâs perfectly familiar with by now. Four years of weekly dinners with a man thatâs well aware of your feelings for his nephew leads to some knowing looks and light teasing.
âOnly reason heâd ever step foot in this town again is for you and you know that,â Wayne says as he opens another beer. He has three every Friday night, but no longer indulges during the week. Ainât so young anymore, son, and I gotta stay active to keep up with all your chores, heâd told Steve when he asked. Steve thinks the doctor told him to take it easier. âI donât think he even told the kids.â
âDonât see why he would. Theyâre all over. Heâs probably seen them on tour.â
Steve tries not to sound bitter. He woke up in his own bed or whatever the saying is. He canât blame Eddie for doing exactly what he said he would, following his dreams, getting the hell out of Hawkins the moment he could. The kids did the same, but at least they visited.
âWell, theyâve been houndinâ him to come visit you.â
Steve lifts his head. âThey what?â
âThey just worry âbout ya,â Wayne shrugs. âSo do I.â
âI went on a date last week! Robin visited two months ago! I see you every Friday!â Steve stands and starts pacing. âIâm gonna go visit Dustin at school in a month. And Will has his freshman exhibition that weâre all trying to meet up at. Itâs not like Iâm lonely.â
âSon, I think the only person lonelier than you is Eddie,â Wayne gives him that sad smile he gives whenever they talk about Steveâs social life. Itâs like he knows itâs pitiful, and he knows Steve knows itâs pitiful, and heâs making sure Steve knows that he knows. âAnd heâs stubborn as a mule, but he cares too much about ya to let you suffer.â
âWho said anything about suffering?â
âItâs implied by the way the kids talk about you.â
âHowâs that?â
âThe word hermit has been used a bunch,â Wayne explains. âNow, Iâm gonna finish this beer and youâre gonna stop workinâ yourself up over something thatâs still days away.â
Steve rushes over to his calendar, holding up the letter, then checking the calendar.
âHeâs gonna be here in three days!â Steve yells. âI canât be ready by then!â
âWhat the hell do you need to be ready for? Itâs just Eddie,â Wayne is smirking again and Steveâs tired of his teasing, but heâs not gonna say anything because it doesnât do any good to draw more attention to it. âHe ainât expecting a welcome committee. Maybe a balloon or somethinâ; You know he likes the show of it all.â
Steve groans.
He does know. Eddie loves dramatics, thatâs what makes him such a good performer on stage. Thatâs what makes him a great DM.
Thatâs what made Steve fall in love with him.
âI donât even know where to get balloons,â Steve says, resting his forehead against the wall.
âThe new Wal-Mart should have some,â Wayne pats his shoulder. âWe watchinâ the game or standing around havinâ a crisis in your kitchen?â
Steve breathes in. He breathes out.
âIâll have a crisis tomorrow, I guess.â
âThatâs my boy!â
++++
The crisis does come the next day, but this time Wayne isnât there to make it worse or better. He considers calling Robin, but he knows sheâll just tell him to use his good cologne and try not to be weird. He even thinks about calling Dustin, but immediately shuts that down when he remembers that Dustin is the one who called him a hermit to Eddieâs face.
He finds balloons at the store, and adds streamers to the cart on a whim. Heâs sure Eddie will love it. Eddie loves that kind of shit.
He also grabs a pie crust and apples because he remembers Eddie saying how much he loves apple pie with vanilla ice cream one time nearly five years ago.
Okay, maybe itâll be weird that he remembered that.
He goes to put the apples back when Joyce bumps into him as sheâs reaching for a bunch of bananas.
âSorry honey!â She throws her hands out to catch him, even though sheâs the one who almost falls. âI wasnât paying attention. You doing okay?â
âYeah, howâre you?â Steve gives her a small smile, trying not to show how panicked he is.
âSweetie, you look stressed. Is something wrong?â
âNo! No, just preparing for a guest,â Steve says, unsure if Eddieâs told anyone else in Hawkins he would be visiting and not wanting to ruin any surprises if he intended on doing that.
He doesnât even know how long Eddieâs staying; He didnât say in his letter or voicemails. Wayne hasnât mentioned it either, which means he probably knows exactly how long heâs staying.
âOh, is Eddie staying with you?â She asks, brows furrowing. âI assumed he was staying with Wayne. I helped him find an apple pie recipe for his visit.â
Steve looks down at the ingredients in the cart, the evidence of what heâs going to make even more obvious now. Joyceâs gaze follows his and she bites back a knowing smile.
âAh.â
âAh?â He asks.
âUh huh,â she says, nodding. âI would make sure to get the green apples. He likes sour more than sweet when thereâs ice cream.â
Steve looks over at the green apples and back at the red apples he was planning on buying. Joyce winks at him before she grabs the bananas and starts to walk away.
âEnjoy the visit!â
Steve doesnât respond.
He grabs six green apples and shoves them in a plastic produce bag.
Heâll make the damn apple pie and Eddie will love it. Steve will pretend the apple pie isnât filled with the love he can barely contain for the man, and maybe Eddie will enjoy it and leave as if he never came.
Maybe Steve can make it through this visit with dignity.
****
Eddie shows up at three in the afternoon on a Wednesday. Technically, itâs 3:03, but Steve wasnât watching the clock or anything. That would be ridiculous.
He looks just like he always did, just like Steve expected. Heâs smiling, and playing with the ends of his curls. Steve is never gonna make it through this visit with dignity.
âStevie!â Eddie rushes in for a hug, and it should be more awkward than it is. Eddie didnât exactly leave on the best of terms with Steve. They really only spoke a handful of times over the last few years, and most of those were forced by Wayne or Dustin. But itâs like he never left, like heâs been hugging Steve every day for years.
Steve soaks it up, falls into it and doesnât care how it looks. If Eddie has a problem with it, he doesnât say so. He holds Steve tighter, his breath warm against his neck.
Eventually, Steve invites him inside and it does start to feel awkward.
Eddieâs a rock star now, and despite how normal he looks, heâs different. Heâs here to see Steve, but is he here out of guilt that it took him this long to visit or because he actually wants to?
Steve talks about work, and his dinners with Wayne, and spends more time than he should explaining Robinâs degree program even though he knows Robin already talked to Eddie when she got accepted. He goes on and on about what everyone else is up to because his life is pretty boring in comparison and he doesnât want to bore Eddie away.
âSounds like everyoneâs doing good, but I already knew that,â Eddie eventually says when Steveâs rambled for much longer than he planned. âHow are you?â
âI told you, Iâm fine,â Steve says. âKinda boring around here, honestly. Howâs the tour been?â
Eddie laughs and Steve tries not to let it hurt. He doesnât think he means it in the way Steveâs taking it and thatâs a Steve problem, not an Eddie problem.
âI called you 37 times,â Eddie says instead of answering him. âEvery city we had a show. The first few I figured you were just busy or asleep. I didnât think about time zones. But then I started to realize you were avoiding me.â
He isnât mad, or at least he doesnât look mad, but Steve feels like he needs to apologize anyway.
âYeah, sorry. After a while, it kindaâŠâ
âSeemed worse to call since it was so long?â Eddie asks, small smile falling from his face when Steve nods. âItâs never a bad thing to hear from friends, though. You couldâve called the bus phone anytime. Left a message. We got an answering machine because Garethâs mom always calls when weâre on stage.â
âRight. Good to know,â Steve says. Which, it is good to know, but he doesnât plan on calling unless thereâs an emergency. He canât look as desperate as he feels and if he calls once, heâll call twice, and then a hundred times. âWhat city was your favorite so far?â
Eddie tilts his head, looks him over for a moment before responding. âI liked Boston. All the kids were front row. Except El, she somehow got backstage. Still not sure how. Missed you, though.â
Steve feels his face heat up at the words. Eddie always said things in a flirty way, even though he doesnât really mean it that way. Steve canât let himself think that he means it that way.
âItâs a pretty big trip, so. I couldnât miss work.â
Itâs a shit excuse because he absolutely could miss work. Itâs a grocery store in a small town, and he doesnât care that much about it.
âThey couldnât find someone to cover a couple days for you?â Eddie sounds hurt now, and Steve canât let him think that heâs the problem.
âI didnât ask. I-â Steve has to be brave now. Wayneâs voice is in his head telling him to just tell Eddie why heâs been so distant, why he hasnât been the one to reach out. âI was scared to go.â
This seems to throw Eddie off balance. His eyes squint and forehead wrinkles adorably as he tries to do mental gymnastics to find out why Steve of all people would be scared to visit him. Steve is known for throwing himself in the line of fire, being the first one to step in when everyone else is scared. Too bad this type of courage is different.
âAre you scared of flying? I didnât know, maybe we could have figured out a hired car.â
âNo, I donât mind flying,â Steve admits.
âThenâŠwhy were you scared?â
âBecause if I let you in, youâll see how much I miss you and if you see how much I miss you, youâll see how much I love you. And then youâd never wanna have me around and it would be just like everyone else I love who leaves because Iâm not enough to keep them around,â Steve lays his head back against the couch. The Wayne voice in his head is suspiciously quiet.
So is Eddie.
Steve isnât going to talk anymore; Heâs said enough.
Eddieâs hand covers Steveâs. Itâs warm and surprisingly soft, and bigger than Steveâs. He never realized that before, not even when he held his hand while he was in the hospital after Vecna or when he watched him play guitar for hours while he was trying to gain his confidence back.
âPeople donât leave because you arenât enough, Steve. They leave because the world is big and they want to be a part of it. Everyone wants you to do that, too,â Eddie says softly, carefully. âI think most of the kids hoped youâd leave Hawkins once they did. Dustin thought youâd come on tour with me.â
âWhy would he think that?â Steve doesnât remember ever having a conversation with Dustin that would make him think that, but his memory isnât the best.
Eddieâs lips curl up into a smile and he leans forward.
âYou know youâre incredibly obvious, right?â Eddie whispers even though theyâre alone and thereâs no need to be quiet. âYouâve always been easy to read.â
âWhat does that mean? Read what?â
âYou wear your heart on your sleeve and itâs been right there with Eddie written across it since I was in the hospital, sweetheart.â Eddie points to Steveâs arm. He looks down as if he would be able to see the heart Eddieâs talking about. âYouâre an open book.â
The timer in the kitchen goes off and Steve jumps up. He rushes to the oven, grateful for the distraction.
âIs that apple pie?â Eddie asks from a few feet away. Steve really shouldâve known he would follow him.
âYes, itâs gotta be perfect.â
âYou made apple pie for me?â
Eddieâs right behind him now, and when he turns, thereâs no space between them at all. Steve smells the airport on him, the rental car, the cologne heâs worn since Steve bought it for him before he left Hawkins.
He looks up and sees the years that have passed in smile lines on Eddieâs face, in a single gray hair that Eddieâs probably keeping because it makes him look cool. Steve hasnât found any gray hairs yet, but heâs only 25. Eddie always said Wayne went completely gray by 30, so his genetics wouldnât be as kind to him. Steve kinda hopes heâs right. Eddie would be beautiful with gray curls.
âJust like I said: heart on your sleeve,â Eddie whispers, leaning in until his lips are just barely brushing against Steveâs.
Heâs waiting for Steve, to see if heâll finally give in after years of near-silence, after whatever flirty and semi-codependent friendship they had before Eddie left to be a rock star.
Steveâs spent enough time waiting, and he thinks Eddie probably has, too.
His lips press against Eddieâs, sure of their movements despite the anxiety crawling through his chest and the unfamiliar taste of him on his tongue.
Itâs full of hunger even though it only lasts a few seconds. Steveâs wanted this, wanted him, for so long, he puts everything he has into this moment. If itâs all he gets, he wants it to be perfect.
âYouâre kissing me like youâre sending me off to war,â Eddie says when theyâve caught their breath.
âFeels like I am,â Steve admits, corner of his mouth turning up in a sad smile. âAt least a little.â
âI think the odds of me dying on stage are probably extremely slim,â Eddie laughs. Steve doesnât laugh with him. âSteve? Whatâs wrong?â
Steve pulls himself away, ignoring the way his chest aches at the separation. Heâll have to get used to that when Eddie leaves.
âYou have a whole new life. Youâre a rock star, Ed. I canât force my feelings on you now.â
âWho said you forced anything on me?â
âI made you apple pie!â Steve exclaims, pulling away so he can breathe again. Having Eddie in his space alters his brain chemistry, maybe his DNA. âI bought all your favorite things so I could try to convince you Iâm worth staying for, even though I canât compare to going on a world tour with your band. I cleaned out the guest room and made sure I put your favorite shampoo in the shower as if you would even notice that. As if it would be enough to keep you around.â
Eddie steps closer, but Steve steps back.
âYour life is different now. Itâs good. I wouldnât add anything to it, and I donât know why I even tried to make it seem like I would.â
Eddie steps closer, and thereâs nowhere for Steve to go. Heâs boxed in against the counter, and Eddieâs face is red with anger. Heâs not scaredâ he could never be scared of Eddieâ but he does swallow around a lump in his throat and try to take a deep breath to calm his racing heart.
âMy life is different now, youâre right about that. My life doesnât even feel like mine most days. I belong to fans, and the guys, and the record label. But you know what does feel like mine?â Eddie leans in close enough that his breath is hot against Steveâs face. âHow much I love you. How much I have always loved you. Youâve always felt like mine, Steve.â
Itâs a hell of a confession, and definitely not what Steve expected from this visit.
The Wayne voice in his head decides to speak again. Except this time, itâs something heâs said to Steve in person before.
Heâs surrounded by people, but he seems pretty lonely. Kinda like he still needs a certain someone.
Steveâs brows crinkle as he thinks about the words Wayne said after a phone call with Eddie during the first part of his first tour nearly two years ago. The words were accompanied by a look that Steve has since come to recognize as his sad puppy look.
The same one Eddieâs giving him now.
Steve canât help it; He laughs.
âYou and Wayne could bottle that look and sell it to people who need someone to feel bad for âem,â Steve says. He cups Eddieâs cheek in his palm, rubs his thumb against the angry red that turns into a flushed pink. âI donât know how you could love me-â
âSteve-â
âBut!â Steve interrupts. âI know you wouldnât have said it if you didnât mean it. And you wouldnât be here if you didnât want to be. If you didnât care, you wouldnât have taken the time to come back here at all, let alone stay with me. I wonât understand it, but Iâll believe it.â
âThat was easier than Wayne said it would be,â Eddieâs smile grows slowly, lighting up his face and the room.
âHeâs been buttering me up for years,â Steve shrugs.
âDoing all the hard work, more like,â Eddie leans forward, rests his forehead against Steveâs. âHe mustâve been sick of hearing me yearn for your love.â
Steve rolls his eyes. âYou know, you could have come back sooner. You didnât have to wait until I was convinced Iâd be alone forever.â
âAnd you could have called me to let me know I could visit sooner.â Eddie pokes the tip of his nose with his finger, smirking as he leans away to look back at the apple pie on the oven. âEspecially if I couldâve been having apple pie on every break.â
âIt might not even be good,â Steve says as he wraps his arms around Eddieâs waist.
âIs there vanilla ice cream?â Eddie pecks his lips.
âMhm,â Steve kisses his cheek. âAnd you can have some if you promise to sit down and tell me everything about the band.â
âYou wanna waste time hearing about Gareth drooling over every woman who looks his way? We could be making love on the couch.â
Steve raises a brow. âWe wonât be making love anywhere but my bed. And it wonât be until weâve talked more.â
âFiiiine,â Eddie rolls his eyes, but grabs for the pie cutter on the counter. âCut me a piece of pie and Iâll do my best to resist taking all your clothes off.â
âI never said you couldnât do that,â Steve grabs the pie cutter.
âSo I can take your clothes off?â
âShirt only. And after pieâŠweâll talk.â
âI thought after pie weâd be done talking.â
âHow long are you staying?â Steve asks as he puts the slice of pie onto the plate and hands it to Eddie.
âFour days.â
Steve tilts his head side to side, considering what he can accomplish in four days.
In any other situation, he might be worried about how quickly he throws off his shirt. In any other situation, he would probably insist on talking to Robin before throwing his heart on the plate next to the scoop of ice cream Eddie just put next to his steaming slice of pie. In any other situation, he would take things slow and get to know rock star Eddie who left Hawkins to be someone.
But heâs finding that heâs okay with speed-running things.
Heâs got a new perspective on Eddieâs visit, and maybe a new perspective on what their future will look like.
Steve drops his pants. Eddieâs eyes widen.
âEat your pie. Weâll talk while we make love on the couch.â
#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#stranger things#steddie events#steddie song fics#steve harrington x eddie munson#wayne munson#rock star eddie munson#getting together#pining#idiots in love
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The Princess and The Pogue | J. M.
Pairing: JJ Maybank x reader
Summary: Your daughter comes home from school telling you about a local OBX fairytale. It turns out itâs about you and your husband.
Listen to But Daddy I Love Him for full experience
Requested by @idontevenknowbsblog
A/N: This turned out way longer and more angsty than I had anticipated but Iâm a sucker for the angst. I just canât help it. Iâm sorry this took me a million years to finish!
As I am an adult, all characters I write for are written as adults. Any minor characters will be aged up to the general range of their actorâs age.
Warnings: allusions to domestic abuse, controlling parents, forced engagement, so much fucking angst, only kinda proofread
Word Count: 3.5k
-
Your daughterâs tiny feet press against the back of your seat as you head home after picking her up from school.
âMia, stop kicking,â You laugh, âMommyâs trying to drive.â
âSorry, Mommy.â Your daughter giggles. âIâm just so happy today!â
âIâm so glad you're happy, Baby.â You smile at the five year old in the rearview mirror. âWhat did you do at school today?â
âWe got to draw all our shapes today and we sang the alphabet song a bunch of times!â
âOoh sounds like a fun day.â
She claps excitedly. âOh and Kylieâs older sister told us a fairytale at recess!â
âA fairytale? Very cool. What was it about?â
âDid you know a princess used to live here? A long time ago. She ran away with a pogue because her evil king father wouldnât let them be together.â
Your eyes widen at her words, a small smile forming on your face as she tells the story that takes you back to what seems like a lifetime ago.
-
âMom, Iâm headed out,â you yelled through the foyer.
âOk, hun.â Your mom poked her head over the stairwell. âJust donât stay out too late. We have that business lunch with the Cameronâs tomorrow and itâs very important that you be there.â
âIâll be back in a few hours,â you promise, âbesides Iâm just going to hang out with Sarah.â
âWe just love that you and Ward Cameronâs daughter are friends. It looks so good for your fatherâs business for the families to be close. Especially with you set to inherit the company someday.â
With Ward Cameron being the biggest real estate developer in the Outer Banks and your dad owning the biggest construction company, the two men worked closely on most of their deals. They were also the closest thing to friends that either of the men had. The two richest men in the island made for a powerful team.
âGlad I can help you keep up appearances,â you muttered under your breath.
âWhat was that, hun?â
âAlways happy to help the family.â You gave your mother a forced smile and made your escape, slipping outside and into Sarahâs waiting car.
âReady to go see your man?â She grins at you and you return the gesture.
âGod, yes.â
-
You hadnât expected to fall in love with JJ Maybank. Considering the very different lives the two of you led it was surprising the two of you ever even crossed paths, but that was one of the perks of being Sarahâs friend. When she fell in love with John B and got involved with the pogues she dragged you along with her.
It wasnât like you had anything against the pogues. In fact, you had admired them from afar your whole life. Their freedom and adventures were something you envied, forever stuck in your kook bubble. You didnât have a choice but to follow the plan your parents had created for you.
JJ, on the other hand, hated kooks with a passion. He had a hard enough time with Sarah joining the group and when she brought you in, arguably the even bigger kook princess with the even bigger kook king of a father, he vowed to himself he would never accept you. After all, you represented everything he hated, the life he always dreamed of but would never attain.
He would sneer and call you âprincessâ, his voice dripping with disdain, doing everything in his power to piss you off, but you didnât mind. You loved his passion and the way he would do anything to protect the people he cared about. You ignored his insults, treating him just as well as you would anyone else.
Before he knew it, your soft words and beaming smile had softened JJ. He began to actually look forward to your presence in the group, feeling sad when you couldnât get away from your parents to spend time with them. Then, one day the two of you were the only ones to show up to a pogue hang out. You ended up spending hours just talking and getting to know each other. The rest was history and you had been together from that day forward.
Unfortunately, you knew that your parents would never let you spend time around a pogue, let alone be in a relationship with one. So, like Sarah and John B, you and JJ had to keep your relationship hidden. Thanks to the help of the pogues, the two of you had been successfully seeing each other behind your parentsâ backs for over a year.
-
âIâll be back to pick you up at 8:00,â Sarah reminds you. She pulls up to the little cove where you and JJ liked to meet. âWe only have a couple of hours tonight because of that lunch tomorrow. Donât want our families to get suspicious.â
You nod. âGot it. Iâll see you then.â You slip out of her car. âTell John B I said hi.â
âWill do.â
She pulls away as you make your way around the rocks hiding the entrance to your spot.
âHi, princess.â Your boyfriend grins at you in the orange light of the sunset, pulling you into a hug.
âJJ,â You breathe him in, soaking up the comfort he gives you. âI missed you.â
âI missed you too, baby. Four days without you is four days too much.â JJ leads you over to the blanket on the sand, sitting back so you can settle between his legs.
âI know. Iâm sorry, I just couldnât get away much this week. My parents are going crazy about this lunch tomorrow.â
âArenât they always crazy?â JJ jokes, poking your side. You squirm a little bit, trying to escape his prodding.
âI mean, yeah. Theyâre just extra crazy this week.â You settle further into his chest, JJ giving up his attack in exchange for wrapping his arms securely around you. He nuzzles his head into the side of your neck. âBut, itâs okay because at least we have right now.â
âHow long do we have until Sarah comes back to pick you up?â
You let out a sigh. âTwo hours.â
âThatâs it? Damn.â
âIâm sorry, J.â You look back apologetically, but he just shakes his head.
âHey, donât apologize. We just have to make the most of the time we have, like usual. It wonât be like this forever.â
âRight.â You give him a small smile, turning back to face the sunset before he can see the doubt in your eyes. You hoped JJ was right, but you had no idea how things would ever change.
As expected, your time together flew by too quickly and before you knew it Sarah was back to take you home.
JJ was reluctant to let you out of his embrace. âWeâre still on for tomorrow night, right? After you finish up with all your kook business?â
âOf course, baby. I wouldnât miss it.â You give him one last goodbye kiss, distracting him long enough to slip out from his arms. He pouts, but lets you go, knowing if it was your choice you would never leave.
-
You stare numbly at the wall, unable to will yourself to move from your position balled up on the bed. You arenât sure how long you've been laying there looking at nothing. You didnât feel anything, having cried out all your tears hours ago. A buzzing sounds from the other side of the room, your phone going off once again, but you donât pick it up. Itâs probably Sarah calling again to see if youâre okay after what happened at lunch. Youâre not.
Having sat in silence for so long, you jump when you hear a rattling at your window. It takes you a minute to clamber over to the window with the lights out in your room. You hadnât realized how dark it had become outside.
You peek out warily, trying to determine the source of the noise. âShit.â You mumble under your breath as you realize JJ is perched in the tree closest to your room.
You unlatch the door so he can climb inside, turning away from him quickly. Youâre thankful for the darkness in that moment as you scramble to make yourself look presentable, flattening your hair and wiping at your face. You pull down the sleeves of the massive sweatshirt youâre wearing, one you stole from JJ months ago, making sure you are completely covered.
âJJ, what are you doing here,â you whisper, âWhat if someone sees you?â
âI was worried about you. You were supposed to meet me hours ago, remember?â He sounds frustrated.
âShit. Iâm sorry. I totally forgot.â You run your hand down your face stressed. âI didnât mean to stand you up.â
âYou forgot? Y/N, Iâve been calling and texting for hours.â JJ moves closer, but you step back. âI thought something bad had happened.â
He takes another step back. Again you back away, trying to keep him from seeing your face. Brows furrowed, JJ moves towards you again. This time you canât move away fast enough, bumping your dresser as you try to get away.
âWoah, wait.â JJ takes your face in gentle hands. âHave you been crying?â
âItâs nothing. Iâm fine.â You try to pull away, but he doesnât let you off that easily.
âBaby, whatâs going on? Is it something I did?â The worry in his eyes brings a fresh wave of tears to your eyes. You shake your head, willing them not to fall.
âNo, no. You havenât done anything wrong.â
âSomething with Sarah?â You shake your head again.
âYour parents?â That stills you. âIt is your parents. What is it? Did something happen at lunch?â
You donât answer.
âTalk to me, baby. I canât make it better if I donât know whatâs wrong.â JJâs voice is so sincere and his touch so soft. He really thinks heâll be able to fix whatever the problem is.
You gather your strength and gently pull away from him, not wanting to see the look in his eyes when you tell him.
âMy father and Ward Cameron have decided that it is in the best interest of their respective businesses for our families to be officially joined.â
âWhat on earth does that mean?â
You feel like you're going to be sick, but you force the words out anyway. âI am set to be married to Rafe Cameron.â You keep your eyes on the floor, waiting for JJâs response. He stays silent.
âI had no idea they had this planned until my parentâs announced it at lunch.â
âWhat do you mean youâre marrying Rafe Cameron?â He tries to keep his voice calm. But you can hear the venom behind his words anyway. âYou canât just marry Rafe.â
âI donât have a choice, JJ. They practically signed my ownership papers over to Rafe right there.â
JJ is pacing your room now, hands constantly running through his hair. âHe canât just do that. Youâre an adult, Y/N. Tell him no.â
âI canât tell him no JJ.â He stops in front of you, the look on his face half shock half anger.
âWhat are you talking about? You canât just tell me that your father is marrying you off to Rafe and not even try to fight him on it.â You turn from his intense gaze, unable to handle it any longer.
âY/N-â JJ reaches for your arm to turn you around and you flinch back hissing in pain. Your sleeve rides up, revealing a number of dark bruises.
âI tried talking him out of it, JJ. He made it clear saying no wasnât an option.â
JJ seethes, body tense with anger. âHe hurt you.â Itâs not a question which is just as well because you have no response.
âIâm gonna kill him.â He growls.
You lay your palms flat against his chest. âNo, youâre not. We canât make this situation any worse than it already is.â
âHe canât just get away with this!â JJâs voice rises with his anger and you shush him quickly, looking back at your door.
âPlease, Y/N.â His voice cracks on your name. âThings canât just end like this.â
The pain in his words breaks your heart. You let the tears fall freely, unable to hold back the emotion any longer.
âIâm so sorry, JJ.â He cradles your face in his hands like he did at the beginning of the night. âThereâs nothing either of us can do to change this.â JJ brushes his thumbs against your cheeks, brushing at the tears. âYou should go.â
âNo, Y/N.â He has tears running down his face too. âI canât leave you like this.â
âPlease, JJ. You have to go before something wakes him up. I donât know what heâll do if he finds you here.â
JJâs eyes flit down to your wrists, taking in the bruises once more before he nods slowly. He wonât be the reason your father hurts you again. You lips press against his slowly, both of you pouring all the love you have for each other into the kiss.
âI love you,â you whisper against his lips.
âI love you, too. Always.â
With those last words, he slips back out your window, closing it quietly behind him. You watch as he climbs back down the tree and crosses the property. As he finally fades out of blue, you sink down to your floor, your knees unable to hold the weight of your body as itâs wracked with sobs.
-
You donât leave your room for days. All you can do is lay in your bed and cry, mourning the loss of the man you love and the life you had planned.
If it was up to you, you would never leave that room. Unfortunately, your parents have other plans. They parade you and Rafe all over town, making sure everyone on the island knows the two of you are âmadly in loveâ and engaged to be married in the spring. The whole pageantry of it makes you sick.
The cherry on top of the whole ordeal is the engagement party that you parents planned for the weekend. They rented out the whole club and invited every kook on the island. Youâre pretty sure itâs your own personal hell.
Sarah pins one last curl to your head. âDone. You look beautiful.â
You give her a small smile that didnât reach your eyes. âThanks, Sarah.â You were dressed in a white sundress that your mother had bought for the party and Sarah had done your hair and makeup to perfection. The whole look was stunning, but you just feel like a trophy being shown off.
Sarah gives you a sympathetic look. âYou ready for this?â
âNo. But I have to be.â
It takes everything in you to keep a smile pasted on your face as Rafe takes your hand and leads you out to the throng of people. Everyone smiles and hugs you, offering their congratulations. You do your best to seem gracious and excited, but all you feel is emptiness and the faces move before you in a blur.
You make it two hours into the party before you canât take it any longer. The panic that has been creeping up your throat all night takes hold and you have to break away. You excuse yourself from Rafe, claiming a need to run to the bathroom. He gives you a harsh look and makes you promise to hurry back, but ultimately lets you go.
You hurry away from prying eyes, not letting yourself break until you get inside. Chest heaving, you gulp down air like youâve just run a marathon. One of your hands is pressed against your chest, the other braced against the walls to hold you up as you stumble towards the bathroom.
Before you can make it more than a few feet an arm catches you around the waist, pulling you into an alcove you had never noticed. You stumble back, trying to pull yourself together, not wanting whoever grabbed you to see your harried state.
âHey, hey. Itâs just me.â
Familiar hands rub up and down your arms, grounding you. You look up to see the blue eyes that you love so much.
âJJ,â you whisper, breaths still coming fast and hard.
âItâs okay, baby. Just breathe.â
JJ holds you close as you will your body to calm, feeling safe for the first time all night.
âWhat are you doing here?â
âI had to see you, talk to you.â
You sigh, looking at him with sad eyes. âAs happy as I am that youâre here, you have to go. If anyone sees you. My father, or Rafe-â
âWhat if you didnât have to worry about them anymore?â
âJJ, weâve been over this. I canât break this engageme-â
âWhat if we just left? You and me. Right now.â His eyes bore into yours, willing you to see the possibility.
You canât act like you havenât had the same thought yourself, but you just didnât see how it would be possible. âHow would that work, JJ? My father controls my whole life. My money, my future, everything.â
âYou donât need anything he has to give you, Y/N.â His voice is pleading.
âJJâŠâ
âWe can figure it out. You have a degree, I have experience. Weâll get jobs. Weâll make it work.â He reaches a hand into his pocket. âI know I canât give you a life like this-â
âI donât want a life like this.â
â-but I will do everything in my power to give you a good life, to make you happy.â He holds up a simple, beautiful band of silver. âWill you marry me?â
You stare up at him with wide eyes. âAre you serious?â
âIâve never been more serious about anything in my life. Say youâll marry me. We can leave right now. I have a plan to get us off the island. Your parents wonât know until itâs too late. Just say yes, please.â
âYes, yes.â You nod vigorously. âIâll marry you.â
You rip off the gaudy ring currently on your hand and JJ replaces it with the silver band. He kisses you so deeply you think you see stars.
âI love you, JJ Maybank,â you whisper when you part.
âI love you too, Y/N Y/L/N, so much.â
You could stay in that moment forever, but you both know you donât have time to waste. JJ begins to pull you to a side exit, but you stop him. Thereâs one last thing you have to do before you leave.
You find a piece of paper, scribbling out a few quick words and titling to your father.
Have fun explaining to the Cameronâs that your daughter ran off with a pogue
Y/N Y/L/N
You set the folded paper on the center table, placing Rafeâs ring next to it.
âReady to get off this island?â
You grab JJâs hand. âGod, yes.â
-
JJ was right, the two of you figured it out. You both found jobs on the mainland and created a happy life for yourselves. You and JJ got married a few months after you ran off and Mia came along a few years later.
You had kept in touch with the pogues of course and they let you know when your father and Ward Cameronâs businesses had come crashing down, forcing the two men off the island. They had no power anymore, so eight years later you decided to move back to your home. People had gossiped at first, but they moved on to the next big thing when they realized that neither you nor JJ cared what they had to say. You wanted to be in the place where you grew up and fell in love, and you wanted Mia to be surrounded by the friends that you called your family.
Mia was just about bouncing in her seat by the time you got home. You hurried to get her out of her carseat so she could rush inside and see her dad. Fridayâs were always her favorite because JJ got off work early and was already home by the time you brought her back from school.
She pulled you along by the hand as she continued on about her fairytale. âThe evil king disappeared and they lived happily ever after.â
JJ scooped Mia up as the two of you entered the house, making the little girl squeal in delight.
âDaddy!â
âWho lived happily ever after, Mia-mine?â She giggled as he burrowed his face in her little belly.
âThe princess and the pogue!â
JJâs eyes met yours over Mia, giving you an intrigued look.
âKylieâs older sister told her a fairytale at lunch about a couple that used to live on the island.â You tell him with a knowing grin.
âA fairytale? Thatâs awesome, baby.â JJ lowers Mia back down to her feet. âHey, why donât you go wash up and Mommy and I will make you a snack.â
âOkay, Daddy!â The little girl runs off happily.
You make your way to the kitchen, JJ coming up behind you and snaking his arms around your waist. âSo the princess and the pogue, huh?â He smirks as you turn to face him.
âWho knew weâd become an OBX fairytale?â You reply.
âIt makes sense. It doesnât get much more âhappily ever afterâ than this. Right, princess?â
You give him a gentle kiss. âRight, pogue.â
-
Writing Masterlist
#jj maybank#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank fic#jj maybank angst#jj maybank fluff#jj maybank fanfiction#jj maybank x y/n#obx x reader#obx fic#obx fanfiction#obx#outer banks#outer banks x reader#outer banks fanfiction#outer banks fic#stars writes#starryblueeyesandstarryblueskies
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unhappy ending - 7dream
wc: 2.2k
summary: 7dream as angst tropes/plotlines (a.k.a. the dreamies as things that make me sad)
warnings: not proofread, extreme angst, hurt/no comfort (mark: cheating, manipulation, toxicity) (renjun: hospitals, depictions of illness and having an unwell appearance) (jeno: depression, depression related habits) (donghyuck: enlistment, death, murder?) (jaemin: this one kinda has comfort? dystopia, implied death, suggestive/after sex) (chenle: a lot of toxicity, being used) (jisung: getting played, heartbreak, ghosting)
an: who let me do this. i am hurting so bad and im the one that wrote it ?!?! this is why i hate angst guys im never doing this again. gonna write the fluffiest of fluff now
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cheating!mark texts you every morning and night, sending sweet messages with the occasional song lyric or spider man quote, be it motivational or romantic. itâs arguably your favorite part of the day, looking forward to the message of the day and the next. itâs quite confusing however, when he texts you one day saying âgoodnight angel, sleep well! gonna be in the studio tomorrow, iâll pick u up on the way <3 love you gorgeous, see you tomorrow minjeongâ⊠when you ask him about it, questioning who this minjeong is, he immediately shuts down any idea of cheating immediately. when you sit in the studio with him the following day, heâs in the booth recording some chords on his guitar when you look at his phone. unsurprisingly, thereâs messages from a âminjeong <3â. upon opening them, you see texts and texts that go on for months. of course, you immediately start screaming at mark, sobbing and punching him with frustration at his unfaithfulness. with a big pout and gifts ready, he kisses your tears away, rocking you back and forth in his arms so sweetly, cooing as he convinces you itâs no one, bringing you to stay with him and ignore the many âi knew itâ texts from your friends.
memory loss!renjun sits in the hospital bed, skin pale and sickly as he draws in a sketchbook with shaky hands. thereâs countless cords and tubes attached to his body, the abundance of technology being the only thing keeping him alive. the nurse standing next to you places a hand on your shoulder, startling you and forcing you to turn away from the hospital doorâs window.
âif youâd like, you can try again today. heâs been pretty stable recently.â her smile doesnât even attempt to reach her eyes, and you know sheâs only doing it to try (terribly) to comfort you.
you nod gently, reaching for the door handle. âmm. thank you, iâll do that.â
when you open the door, he looks up, eyebrows furrowing as he looks at you. âwho are you? what are you doing here?â
you sit next to him, reaching for his hand, but he flinches and pulls it to his chest. ârenjun⊠i- iâm sorry. i should have asked. iâm your girlfriend, weâve been dating for three years, can you remember?â
he looks you up and down judgmentally, though it isnât too intimidating when heâs as skinny as a twig. âno, iâm sorry, you must be mistaken. iâm very much single.â
just like that, your skin heats up with frustration and you have to fight back tears. turning on your phone, you turn it to him, showing your lock screen of the two of you. he only looks more confused, so you unlock it and begin scrolling through your gallery, swiping through photos upon photos of the memories between you two.
âdo you really not remember any of this..? weâve been dating for the past three years, we met in high school, donghyuck introduced us.. please tell me you remember, any of it.â your voice quivers, the tears falling freely now.
he shakes his head, albeit weakly. âno, iâm sorry i donât remember any of this. are you sure you know what youâre talking about?â
from your bag, you pull out a small framed piece of canvas paper. on it is a bouquet of your favorite flowers, renjunâs signature in the bottom corner. âjunnie, do you remember painting this?â he nods gently. âyou made this for me. itâs my favorite flowers, and you gave it to me on my birthday.â
âthat.. doesnât sound right. i create art for myself, not to gift to other people. i wouldnât do that. how did you get that.â
you canât even see whatâs in front of you, heaps and heaps of tears falling from your eyes. this is the third week in a row, trying to help renjun regain his memories, and the third week it failed. no matter what you say, what you show him, itâs like you never existed. the nurse opens the door, suggesting you leave, and as she helps you out you leave the painting with him, hoping and praying heâll be able to remember you and all the love you had for each other.
overwhelmed!jeno was the sweetest to you, always being there for you when you needed it. no matter what he was always a call away, if you needed him he was there. he paid attention to your every need, and kept tabs on just about everything relating to you. favorite color, movie, flower, clothing style, everything. he was genuinely the best boyfriend you think youâd ever encounter. he treated you so, so good, rubbing your feet when you were tired, taking care of you when sick, and buying you the cutest of gifts âjust becauseâ. you were the same way with him too, yâknow. whenever he felt overwhelmed, whether it be from the attention of his peers or even his own thoughts, you always knew how to calm him down. he found a home in your arms, as did you with him. everyone around you could see how perfect you two were, saying that love was real because of you. it was like everything was perfect as long as jeno was by your side. however, every couple has a rocky patch, and it just seems that you guys couldnât make it through. sometimes, jeno got too burnt out taking care of you, despite it being something he enjoyed, and fell into habits of not taking care of himself. he grew eye bags, sleeping all day and didnât look or act anything like himself. the outside world along with all his responsibilities at home, and his own, nagging, overwhelming, intrusive thoughts became too much, and he found it a struggle to love himself, let alone another person. with all the love in your heart, you had no choice but to part ways with him in hopes of him getting better and finding himself again. you hoped that his future had you in it, but you doubt you can be in the picture when he enters the right state of mind.
bf!donghyuck who spent the past year living his best life with you, taking you out on extravagant dates and vacations to make as many memories as possible before his enlistment. he bought so many gifts, took so many photos, and left so many marks in your shared home to make sure youâd never miss him. despite joking about it all the time, he was scared and upset about it as well. whole writing a letter for every month he was gone, more than half ended up having tear stains on them. tucking the final one into the box and leaving it somewhere for you to find, he grabbed his bags and ran to the car, sitting in the passenger seat while you drove him to the site. the whole ride was filled with tears and pointless arguments, the dread consuming you both. a whole year and a half without your soulmate, the love of your life was something you truly couldnât bare. once you arrived, you helped him grab his stuff and make his way to the place where you would depart. right before he made his way to the hundreds of other men he would be going with, he dropped his stuff and held you tightly in his arms, kissing all your tears away and blending them with his own, promising that it would go by quickly, like he was never gone. for the first couple months you believed it, uncovering pranks and hidden gifts from him throughout the time he was gone. however, the third month came, and his gift this time wasnât funny, or cute at all. when you opened your tv that morning, the news channel popped up, the reporter giving a solemn expression as he relayed the news that your loverâs base, the place donghyuck was stationed at, had been attacked, majority of the soldiers there being killed. a list of names was revealed, and with your heart beating out of your chest and nausea waving through you, your eyes trailed down the list until it stopped. lee donghyuck, age 24, was in the list of soldiers who had died. your entire lifeline, the one who owned your entire heart, the man who reminded you of the warm sun, had lied to you. he was gone, and wasnât coming back.
dystopian bf!jaemin is someone who you admittedly donât know too well. the world is overheating, on the verge of ending, and the sky is bright orange, air smoky in the mid-day when you meet him. with 30 minutes left on earth, the announcement ringing through all devices and televisions in the world. laying on the hood of his car, watching smoke billow through the sky in the distance, he turns to you with a smile.
âyâknow, iâm really happy i met you, girlfriend.â his skin is bare, a dirty blanket covering both of your exposed bodies. at this point, you couldnât care less about your skin being dirty.. thereâs thirty minutes until you die, and with your boyfriend of about five hours, the only thing youâre concerned about is getting all your firsts checked off before everything ends.
you smile back, resting your head on your arm. âme too, boyfriend. this couldnât have gone any better.â he pulls you in ever so gently, kissing you once again. itâs quite embarrassing, being in your twenties and having never experienced anything romantic, but you and jaemin are in the same boat and you both can agree that itâs really nice.
âtouchĂ©. say, why donât we get to know each other with what time we have left, hm?â his hand caresses your hair, putting a strand behind your ear. you can feel his hands shaking against your skin, and you try not to let it but it makes you all the more nervous about whatâs to come.
âof course, shoot.â pulling your shirt on, you sit up and he follows suit.
with your last thirty minutes on earth, you share the stories of your parents who succumbed to the wrath of the decaying planet and all the other funny stories of your lives. the end felt so lonely this past month, and as your phone alerts you of there being a minute left, you feel whole again despite your sadness and fear. finding someone so similar to you, relating to him and connecting with him in such terrifying moments makes you feel a lot less empty. as you count down, saying goodbye to your short life, you watch the world around you, including yourself, burn while in the arms of someone you never thought youâd have.
toxic!chenle who always kept you on his arm, yet thatâs all he ever did for you. he never addressed you or looked your way, but he never let you create any distance between you and him. if anyone asked, you were âhis lovely, beautiful girlfriendâ, but as soon as heads turned you were nothing but an annoying pest who kept clinging to him. you asked to be loved, to feel appreciated, and heâd look at you, an unconvincing pout on his face as he held yours lovingly and convinced you heâd change and give you the love you deserve. heâd take you out on a date, spoiling you with every penny just to make a post about it and then kick you to the curb. he didnât love you, you knew that, but his attention was everything to you. he treated you so well when eyes were on you two that it was all you needed to stick around, giving him all your love when to him you were nothing but a shiny new toy to parade around to his friends.
heartbreaker!jisung who reached out to you one day, saying he was a friend of a friend who wanted to get to know you. youâve never had that happen to you before, being wanted, so you began talking to him. he was so sweet, a cute, shy boy whoâs fails at flirting and romantic gestures were extremely charming. he swept you off your feet quickly, taking you on many dates and buying many gifts for you. this dragged on for a long time, and you were so happy to have someone by your side that you didnât even think of the fact that he never asked to make it official until your friend brought it up. thinking things were going well, you called him and suggested giving your relationship a title. immediately his line went silent, giving you no response, only being able to hear his hyperventilating, before he hung up. you texted him and called many times, begging him to tell you what was up, but it all fell on deaf ears as he eventually blocked you on everything. you were left heartbroken without closure, only hearing what happened when a friend of his reached out, apologizing on his behalf. allegedly, he said he was too scared to have a real relationship and couldnât be a boyfriend to you. you couldnât believe your ears, or, eyes. he made you feel so loved, so seen, all for him to back out because he was too scared to love, too unready.
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â âââââ
perm taglist: @chenlezip
#mejaemin#nct#nct dream#nct x reader#nct dream x reader#nct angst#nct dream angst#mark lee#mark lee x reader#huang renjun#huang renjun x reader#lee jeno#lee jeno x reader#lee donghyuck#lee donghyuck x reader#na jaemin#na jaemin x reader#zhong chenle#zhong chenle x reader#park jisung#park jisung x reader#mark lee angst#renjun angst#jeno angst#haechan angst#jaemin angst#chenle angst#park jisung angst
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First Crush - 6
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After the park, all Abby could talk about was her day with Bucky. Even when her eyes were closed, she kept chatting away, past her bedtime. Part of you found it adorable & the other part had you worried. Abby is way to attached for your liking.
Jason was an absent father, but that still doesn't mean Abby didn't miss him or wasn't affected by his death. He died in a plane crash. His daredevil ways that first attracted you to him was the same reason you were alone now. He wasn't brave & heroic, dying for his country or on a mission. He was foolish and selfish, hot-dogging it when he lost control of his aircraft. Most people dropped the subject after you say he died in a plane crash, assuming it was work related. He was stupid. Always chasing the next high. The next rush. He had a wife and baby at home. He should have been thinking of you and Abby.
You couldn't deny the attraction you felt to Bucky, but look at his job. He was an Avenger for God's sake! The bad guys he chases were much worse than your common criminals. The risks were much higher. You were second-guessing you decision in exposing Abby to Bucky. Not that you could truly stop it. Abby was drawn to him at first sight.
*****
"There you are." Bucky enters your office & sits in the chair opposite your desk.
Pushing your lunch to the side, "Hey Buck, did you need something?"
"For the past couple days I thought I'd see you in the cafeteria."
"Sounds like high school," laughing, "I was studying in the library." Bucky frowns at you, "I usually bring home lunch so i eat in my office. It's easier."
Leaning forward, "Well, tomorrow, would you have lunch with me? We don't have to stay here. We can go to this diner around the corner. Their burgers are pretty great." He picks up that you're unsure. "C'mon, doll. I know you want to."
You laugh at his ego. I mean, he wasn't wrong. "Ok."
"I'll swing by around 1p. Is that too late?"
"No, that's fine."
"Then its a date."
"It's not a date. It's lunch." He doesn't say anything, just gives you a look. Its a date.
******
The following night at the gym with Sam, Sam broaches a subject that the others were shying away from. "I saw you leaving with Y/N earlier."
"We went to the diner for lunch."
"So, what's going on with you two?"
Bucky shrugs, "Just 2 friends having lunch."
"MmmHmmm. Do you know what you're doing?"
"What do you mean?"
"Y/N's a special breed. She's a single mother. She don't need you wasting her time. You take on extra responsibilities if you start dating her."
"Relax."
"I'm just saying, you can easily find someone else to kill time with. You string her along, she's not the only one you'll be hurting. From what i hear, her daughter is obsessed with you."
"We went on a picnic & lunch. We're still figuring out what this is."
"And that's fine. Just keep in mind she brings more to the table than just herself."
"Ok, got it. Lecture over?"
Sam shrugs and leaves the gym.
*****
"Mama?"
"Yes."
"When am I seeing Bucky again?"
"I don't know, baby. He's very busy with work." You feel a little guilty at how badly Abby wants to see Bucky & you've been having lunch with him everyday for the past couple weeks. He's been dropping by your office with his own lunch to spend time with you.
"Can I asks him? I can draws him a letter." You laugh but stop when you see the earnest little look on her face.
"You know what? That sounds like a very good idea. Maybe you can invite him over to watch a movie & then dinner?"
Abby screams, climbing on the couch to give you a wet kiss on your cheek. "Bucky comes to my house??"
You release a deep breath, "Yes, you can invite him here." She runs off to her room to draw his letter. You lean your head back on the couch hoping you made the right choice.
*****
LIke clockwork, Bucky shows up at 1pm for lunch with you. You slide Abby's drawing across the desk to him. He has a smile on his face even before he opens it. When he opens it, his smile freezes and he looks between you and Abby's drawing. You cover your lips with your fingertips while you watch him, trying to suppress a smile.
"Doll, you're going to have to help me out here. Wh...what am I looking at?"
"What? You can't figure it out?" Bucky is put on the spot. "You're lucky Abby isn't here." You tap the left side of the picture. "What's this?"
"It looks like guts and eyeballs."
"Bucky!!"
"I don't know."
"It's spaghetti and meatballs."
"Oh! Ok. So this is us," indicating 3 stick figures in the middle. "And...I need help again. "This isn't brains."
"Jesus! You're terrible at this. It's a bowl of popcorn. Abby is trying to invite you over for a movie and dinner at our place."
Bucky laughs so hard, he has to rest his head on your desk. "So, I'm not invited over to commit a murder, because I don't do that anymore."
"My baby does NOT murder people! I'm not sure I want you over anymore."
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry." He grabs your hand from across the desk & kisses your knuckles. "Please don't take away the invite. I want to come over."
"Will you be free this Saturday?"
"Yes, I leave next week for a mission, but I'll be here on Saturday."
"Ok," you text him your address. "Maybe 3p? It'll be after her nap & we can watch a movie before dinner."
"Thank you, I'll be there." He give you his charming smile & you have to look away. You hope this isn't a mistake.
Next Chapter
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w/c: 2.4k tw/s: f!reader, alcohol, underage drinking, characters 17/18 (high school grad age lmao), emotionally neglectful parents notes: so incredibly selfship coded sorrynotsorry i need him in ways i cannot describe, thank u my loves @t-tomuras & @heartsyougave for always helping me i will love u in every life mwah + archive link if you prefer <3 + ode to a conversation series
you were a good baby. your mother had gone on and on about it when speaking to your family, their sweet coos of how adorable you were was always followed by how easy you were. no colic, hardly ever sick (your mothers favourite fact that you'd started sleeping through the night before any of the other kids in her mama & me group), the happiest, giddiest baby if the photos decorating the house were anything to go by; pictures of you giggling in the sink for a bath, babbling while you crawled through the house, squealing with two tiny teeth poking out of your gums when you'd play with your animal blocks.
you were a good child. your parents bragging to their friends about you constantly; not clingy, not whiny, so independent. every report card was a testament to your friendliness, your teachers gushing about how well you played, well-behaved, quiet, how they always trusted you to stay attentive as the rowdier kids tugged at your belongings.
you were a good teenager. quiet. reserved. smart.
relaxed. easy. unbothered.
the kind your parents friends adored.
the kind of teenager that didn't kick up a fuss when they'd forget to pick you up after school, or when your hobbies were brushed aside, or even when they told you they'd booked a trip, only two weeks long they assured you, promising you'd be okay without them. you were a good teenager, you'd be able to take care of yourself.
in return, you reassure them, too, you'll be okay. you'll be good. you'll make smart decisions.
you don't kick up a fuss, don't even mention your graduation date, right in the centre of their trip, when your parents will be preoccupied with sunshine and drinks and dancing.
you're a good kid. you don't cling. you don't whine. you don't cry. not the kind of kid your parents have to worry, or think, about.
"i've never done this," you think your voice wavers, either with excitement, apprehension, you don't quite know.
"never snuck around? i know, i've been trying to get you to come party with me since my fifteenth." the tension around you melts, even as you glare at your best friend, your shoulders sagging with every ounce of stress slowly abandoning your body staring up at him, your lips even tugging a little at the corner.
"this is far different than sneaking over to your house, oliver."
"well, duh, we're stealing alcohol this time," stretching the final inch to the cabinet above the fridge, he grasps two bottles from the tall cupboard, inspecting the labels with a firm grip around the necks of the bottles, "vodka okay?"
you shrug, you didn't know what vodka tasted like, only knew that this was expensive. this is your long-awaited teen rebellion, isn't it even better if it's not okay? if your parents return home, aghast at a house full of empty bottles and broken glasses? (you know they won't. you know you'll wake up tomorrow and tidy your mess, you'll be the good kid you are.)
pressing your back into the cold steel of the fridge, you stare up at oliver, reaching for one of the clear bottles, inspecting it like he had, the percentage on the front of the label meaning nearly nothing to you, "i've never had it before."
"you've never had anything," oliver teases, odd eyes glinting impishly when you crack a tiny grin at him. in all your years of friendship, he had never failed to make you smile, always drawing out a bubbly person, the you oliver knew like the back of his hand.
you'd been upset since your parents left, even more so this morning since you got to school, your dim eyes meeting his shining with energy, blue and green radiant, eager for the end of this chapter; he'd seen the dejected look in your eye, the small line of tears gathering in your waterline when you asked him to come over after the ceremony.
if oliver had asked you, he's certain you'd flash a smile at him, say you were fine, you were good, assure him not to worry. he knew you better than that.
"i have so!" immaturely, you snatch the second bottle from his arms, something about his teasing always riling you up easily, always having you act like a stubborn child even as you played at being an adult for the night. setting the bottles down, you debate getting martini glasses down, somehow using plastic cups feels too immature for your newfound rebellion, your sprouting adulthood.
"name one thing," the lid cracks easily in oliver's hands, his lips splitting into a grin when you stutter over your answer, "tell you what, let's play a game instead."
placing two plastic tumblers on the counter (deciding against the glass, deciding they're too grown up for a teen rebellion) letting oliver fill them with the alcohol and juice until they're nearly overflowing.
"name one thing you haven't done, and if i've done it, i'll drink it."
"⊠you mean never have i ever." you stare blankly at him, leaning a hip on the counter.
"i guess you can call it that."
"quit acting like you invented the game," again, his eyes sparkle when your lip curves even more at his stupid jokes, finally seeing a flash of your teeth.
"i mean, can you really prove i didn't?"
"let me see if i understand this brand new game," holding the bottle in one hand, and your glass in the other, you wander from the kitchen to the living room, sitting cross-legged on the floor, waiting for oliver to follow suit before continuing, "never have i ever: invented a drinking game that was already invented before."
you give him a pointed look, your first giggle of the night breaking through the air as he rolls his eyes and takes a sip of the drink, grimacing a little at the flavour, the cups poured with far too much vodka.
"my turn."
"good luck, is there anything you haven't done?" you repeat in the same tone he'd used on you in the kitchen, playfully jabbing at your best friend.
he was a horrible influence truly, almost completely opposite to you; rolling his eyes at you from across the maths classroom, knowing you'd offer to help him later, winking at you from across the soccer field whenever he scored while you studied on the sidelines, revving his car beside you whenever he caught you walking along the street, his list of athletic achievements at graduation was longer than anyone else, while your name had only a few listed after, oliver earning cheers and screams from his teammates and every fan he'd earned in the school, you on the other hand had only heard him calling, whistling and cheering your name from the crowd, whooping still when you walked back down the stairs from the stage with hot cheeks.
with a playful glare, he speaks, "never have i ever: stolen my parents vodka."
"that's cheating, you've stolen plenty of their drinks."
"never vodka before. and, as the creator of this game, i declare you must drink."
rolling your eyes, you take a mouthful of the drink, grimacing like oliver had at the awful taste, the liquid dancing from your tongue down to your stomach, already making your fingers tingle at the exhilaration.
"you like it?"
with your face still scrunched up, you shake your head, trying to think of any universe where people would choose to drink this, oblivious to his gaze washing over you, both of you still in your uniforms, your mascara smudged at your waterline, your fist clenched on your thigh, willing yourself to like the abhorrent drink he'd made.
"you get used to it," oliver laughs, taking another short sip of the drink in his own glass, the taste not as polarising after the first drink of it.
"i don't believe you," you tease, following his suit, taking another small sip, hoping to force your taste buds to adapt to the taste quickly, pausing your drinking only to continue the game, "never have i ever rejected the person i fawned over for a literal year just because she asked me out first."
he pouts before taking a sip, mumbling under his breath like a petulant child.
"what was that, huh?" your cheeks are warm, the tips of your fingers already tingling with each mouthful more, already nearing the bottom of your glass, oliver's now empty after this drink.
"i wasn't fawning over her." he mumbles like a brat again, leaning over you to reach for the bottle, topping up your glass then his own, making no comment to the fact his crush had all but vanished the moment she'd approached him beside your locker after school had ended, ren leaning between the two of you to flirt with your best friend, the glimmer in his eyes dimming the more she spoke, seemingly only bright when he'd glance at you over her shoulder.
"never have i ever fallen asleep during one of my matches." he nearly tips your glass all over you, pushing it closer with a very pointed look, the memory from your first year of friendship always fresh in your mind, only ten falling asleep beside the soccer field, staying up all night the day before after your first sleepover of many at the aiku house, oliver had too much energy for a child, and you still stand by that now.
"how many times are you going to make me apologise for that?" dramatically, you sigh and roll your eyes, having a mouthful of the drink he shoved towards you.
raising the drink to your lips, you swig your losing drink.
"never have i ever kissed someone."
glancing at him over the rim, you think you can almost see two of him, something that would once terrify you, two olivers? you can't imagine living in a world like that. now, it makes you feel a little warm, a fuzziness flowering over your spine that you hope is because of the alcohol. you hope it's just because he's the one in front of you right now and for no other reason. not when you knew oliver's dreams, his plans, and your own ambitions. both of you planning to abandon the town you grew up together in for bigger, better things.
"that's cheating." both blurry oliver's glare at you, slurring his words ever-so-slightly.
"no, it's not!" you're quick to defend yourself, nearly tipping backwards onto the floor, batting away his hand trying to pass you the bottle as punishment for lying, goading you into doing a penalty shot.
"is too! what about that guy you dated?" oliver knows his name, hadn't forgotten it since you told him you had a boyfriend a year ago.
"sota? we hardly dated for a fortnight."
"you never kissed him?"
giggling, you shake your head, your eyes sluggish to meet his again when you take another sip.
"did you want to?"
"kiss sota? not now." you make a disgusted face at him, similar to the one you'd made after your very first drink, sticking your tongue out dramatically, "at the time, i don't know, his lips didn't look soft like yours do, though."
"you look at my lips?" your face is hot, from the alcohol, from your loose lips.
"what? no." fuck, you said that way too fast, the lie making your body hotter when you glanced at his smiling lips now, flashing his teeth laughing at you, a large hand clutching his stomach, your embarrassment more hilarious than normal with the vodka running through his veins.
"it's okay if you do, i think about kissing you, too."
you freeze, mid-stretch toward your glass, stuck between wanting to clear your dry throat with the alcohol, something to keep your hands busy and to remain frozen like a deer in headlights, as if your movement is what you'd heard instead of his words. to keep you from staring at his eyes. when had you two gotten so close?
despite your proximity, oliver leans closer, leaning his forearm on the table beside you to inch further into your space, his hair tickling your forehead.
"you want to kiss me?" it's all but a whisper into the room, loud enough for him to hear, but not enough to disturb the atmosphere around you both.
"do you want to kiss me?"
you don't move, you don't want to disrupt the air as you both lean forward into the other, losing yourself in his gravity.
your lips are barely an inch away from his, your eyes stuck on his soft pink smile, you think you've been staring at his lips since he cheered for you walking across the stage at 10am, his beaming smile at the forefront of your mind.
"yes." you don't remember saying the words as soon as your lips move, too preoccupied by the sensation of his mouth on yours, of his hair between your fingertips, of his hands on your jaw, your saliva becoming his and his oxygen becoming your own. your head feels weightless, his hands steadfast on you all that's keeping you from floating away.
you don't know if you're too intoxicated by the alcohol or him but it feels so different from how your friends had described their adventures in kissing, how strange and alien it felt to taste someone else, to breathe (you keep forgetting to inhale, oliver's touch on your warm skin stealing the oxygen from your lungs each time you think to suck in some air), where to put your hands, how to use your tongue.
all of their stories felt nothing like this. nothing they described could live up to this.
you sigh against his lips, melting into his body, a million thoughts racing through your mind and somehow not a single thing floating to the forefront except the feeling of his touch on your mind. a deep want panging in your gut when his lips part, his tall frame crowding closer to you, your head tilting back almost until you're laid beneath him on the floor.
you almost think this is too much for a friend to just help a friend learn how to kiss, almost pull away to break the connection between your bodies, almost remember his plans to leave here. to move on.
you break the kiss after what feels like hours, certain your eyes are crossed and glazed when you stare up at him, his hands still cradling your jaw, yours slipping from his hair down to his shoulders, averting your eyes thinking of him moving on, forgetting this kiss while it would haunt you for your life.
© all works belong to @a-ikuoliver, @gwen0m, and dlirious on archive of our own, do not plagiarise, translate, repost, feed my works into ai or recommend my work on other platforms, or bind my fanworks for sale.
#oliver aiku x reader#aiku oliver x reader#aiku x reader#bllk aiku x reader#aiku bllk x reader#ăaiku <3ă#ămercury writesă
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â±Drawing Stars Around Your Scars | Oliver Queenâ°
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Pairing: Oliver Queen x reader
Warnings: injuries and mentions of blood
Summary: Oliver would do anything to regain your trust. . .
________________________________________________
âGood Night, Doctor Y/L/N.â Ella, one of the nurses at the nursesâ station waves me goodbye and I return the gesture with a tired smile.
I just got out of an eight hour surgery and I canât wait to get home. I make my way through the busy halls of the hospital and down to the parking garage without changing out of my scrubs.
Itâs freezing outside and when my fingers curl around the cold leather of my steering wheel I shiver.
I pull out of the underground parking garage and make my way home.
The streets of Starling City are busy, even at this time of day, which is why it doesnât take long for me to be stuck in traffic.
I sigh and turn on the radio, humming along to the Christmas songs that are playing before my phone rings.
I glance at it and smile, answering the call on my carâs hands-free. âSpeedy, what are you doing up this late? Itâs a school night.â I tease, but my smile quickly vanishes and turns into a concerned frown when I hear the girl crying softly on the other end of the line.
âIâm sorry, Y/N. Are you still at work?â she say quietly.
âNo, Iâm not. Are you okay? Whatâs going on?â I ask, drumming my fingers on the steering wheel, worried.
When Oliver vanished at sea five years ago, Thea and I grew extremely close. While she grieved over her brother, I grieved over my best friend and partner in crime.
We grew so close in fact that sheâs like a baby sister to me now and whenever sheâs in trouble, or feeling down, Iâm usually the one she calls since Moira and Walter are both emotionally unavailable.
Thea doesnât answer right away, so I promt her softly. âSpeedy? You still there?â
âIâYeah, Iâm still here. Itâs just. . . Ollie. He not home, again! And heâs acting like a complete stranger. I donât even recognize him anymore itâs justââ she breaks down in tears and I make a u-turn the next chance I get, heading toward the Queenâs manor outside the city.
This isnât the first time sheâs broken down over Oliverâs return and how different he is compared to five years ago.
âC-Can you come over?â she hiccups and I tell her that Iâm already on my way.
The traffic thins out once Iâm out of the city, staying on the phone with Thea the entire time until I pull up outside of her familyâs manor.
The security guard at the gate greets me with a polite smile and letâs me in without hesitation.
I get out of the car, the gravel beneath my feet crunching as I walk up to the front door, which swings open before I get the change to ring the doorbell.
Thea basically jumps on me, pulling me into a hug, and cries into my shoulder.
I hold her tight and waddle us inside, away from the cold and let the door close behind us with a gentle click.
âThank you for coming,â Thea whispers, her grip around my shoulders not letting up.
âOf course. Anything for you, Speedy,â I reply just as quietly, rubbing my hands over her back.
We stay like that for a few minutes, enjoying each otherâs company before she pulls back, her eyes roaming over my outfit.
âYou just got off work, didnât you?â she asks, guilt scrunching up her face. âYou must be so tired. Iâm sorry for making you come here.â
I wave her off and squeeze her shoulders. âHey, no. Donât be sorry. I am tired, yes, but youâre more important than sleep,â I joke softly which earns me a small smile.
Thea sighs and uses the sleeve of her sweatshirt to wipe away the remainder of her tears. Then, she eyes me hopefully before asking, âHave you had dinner yet?â
I shake my head and she pulls out her phone, waving it around for emphasis.
âDo you want to order some takeout then and watch a movie with me?â
Tomorrow is my day off, so I donât mind staying with her, especially because sheâs home alone and it seems like she could use some company right now.
âSure,â I agree easily, âbut I need a shower and some comfy clothes.â
Thea nods adamantly and pulls me upstairs and into her room.
âUse whatever you like in there. You know the drill,â she says gesturing at her en-suite bathroom. âIâll go and find some clothes for you.â
I thank her and smile, going into the bathroom and stripping out of my scrubs before stepping into the enormous shower.
A knock on the door lets me know that Theaâs found me some clothes and she cracks it open just enough to reach inside, placing some clothes on the floor before closing the door again.
I finish quickly, shutting off the water before drying off and putting on the fresh clothes.
I frown when I pull on the pair of gray sweatpants, figuring that they canât be Theaâs because sheâs a head shorter than me and the sweatpants are oversized, even on me.
The same goes for the sweatshirt and when I pull it on and a familiar cologne surrounds wafts around me, I know why.
These are Oliverâs clothes.
I shiver involuntarily and canât help but bury my nose in the fabric of the sweater, taking a deep breath.
Iâve missed this smell, Iâve missed Oliver, but I havenât really admitted that to anyone since he came back.
Weâve always been best friends, but since we were teenagers I knew that my feelings for him werenât solely platonic.
I never acted on them though because I knew we could never work. While he was a millionaire playboy, I was a nerd, passing all my classes in school with flying colors and getting into med school before even turning twenty.
I also hated how he hooked up with anyone he had a chance with, and I swore to myself a long time ago that Iâd never let myself be just another one of his conquests.
Now though, things have changed. Oliver has changed and I have, too. Weâre both grown up and it seems like heâs left behind his playboy lifestyle.
Every time I see him nowadays, heâs calm, well spoken, and a true gentleman. He no longer drinks or takes drugs, and Iâve caught him shamelessly staring at me quite a few times now.
Itâs something he didnât used to do, and it gets my hopes up that, maybe, he secretly feels the same way about me as I do about him, but then he goes and blows me off time and time again, without answering any of my texts or calls.
Itâs gotten to the point where I donât even agree to hanging out with him any more because I know heâll leave me hanging anyway, but still, every time he asks me to dinner, or offers to buy some coffee my heart flutters and I feel my cheeks grow warm.
âSo, what do you want to watch?â Thea asks when I exit the bedroom, throwing myself on the bed next to her.
âI donât care,â I say honestly, checking my phone before leaning back against the headboard.
âOkayyy.â Thea hums in though. She scrolls through some movies on her TV before settling on Elf.
The opening credits start rolling and I get even more comfortable, patting Theaâs head playfully when she rests it on my shoulder.
Fifteen minutes into the movie, our food gets delivered and we eat on the bed in silence, continuing to watch the movie.
Thea eventually falls asleep and I sigh, turning off the TV.
I get off the bed and drape the comforter over her, chuckling softly when she frowns in her sleep.
âNighty night, Speedy,â I whisper before leaving her room.
I make my way down the dark hallway toward the grand staircase, ready to go home, but the sound of breaking ceramic makes me stop in my tracks.
I squint in the darkness, straining to hear where it came from before deciding to investigate.
The sound most likely came from Oliverâs room and because heâs not supposed to be home, Iâm curious to see what caused the slight commotion.
Maybe the Queens got a cat I donât know about?
I highly doubt that, but then again, Theaâs done some crazy things over the last couple of years, lashing out every chance she got to mask her grief.
I slowly open the door to Oliverâs room and peek inside, freezing when I see a hunched over figure by one of the bedside tables.
Theyâre picking up what looks like shards of a vase, stacking them neatly before getting back to their feet.
A quiet grunt escapes them and once theyâre upright with their back turned toward me, I recognize them, or should I say him?
Itâs Oliver in his vigilante suit and when I take a closer look I notice heâs clutching at his side with one of his hands.
Heâs hurt.
I turn on the light with an annoyed sigh and put my hand on my hip, watching him spin around with a dagger in his hand.
âWhat are you doing here?â he asks in his fake deep and gravelly voice and I just raise a challenging eyebrow in return.
âDrop the act, Ollie,â I say calmly, watching with mild amusement as his eyes widened.
âIâ What are youâ?â he stammers before his shoulders curl forward and he whispers, âHow did you know?â
He takes off his hood and even though I know itâs him underneath, I still feel a chill run down my spine when his exhausted eyes meet mine.
Iâve known heâs the Green Arrow ever since he returned to Starling City. I mean, how could I not know?
All the sneaking around? His sudden interest in his familyâs business? The constant bruises and cuts on his face?
And letâs not forget how he physically changed over the last five years. Where he used to be a thin, athletic kid heâs now a broad-shouldered hunk of a man and Iâd be lying if I said it makes him less attractive.
âCâmon, Ollie,â I scoff, crossing the room to look at the injury on his side. âYou do know who youâre talking to right now, donât you?â
Oliver hangs his head and stays silent, allowing me to pull up his bloody clothes to get a better look at his side.
The wound isnât too deep, but it will need stitches and judging by its frayed edges Iâm guessing itâs a graze from a bullet.
âDo you have any medical supplies?â I ask. I have a small emergency kit in my car, but Iâm too lazy to get it right now.
Luckily, Oliver nods and points at the bedside table where he was just crouching, picking up the shards of the shattered vase.
âTake off your shirt and lay on the bed,â I command without looking at him. In times like this, my doctor-ly instincts kick in and I donât care who my patient is. All Iâm focusing on is getting the wound cleaned and stitched up.
Oliver does as I say and once Iâve gotten everything I need from the bedside table, I turn to him, sucking in a breath when my eyes land on his exposed upper body.
Itâs covered in scars and a tattoo I didnât know he had and I can only imagine what he went through to look like this.
Thea did say that over twenty percent of his body was covered in scar tissue, but actually seeing it up close makes my stomach twist.
Watching me with a knowing look, Oliver gently wraps his fingers around one of my wrists which brings me back to reality.
He smiles reassuringly, silently telling me not to worry about whatâs happened and I return the smile albeit a little weakly.
I take a deep breath and square my shoulders, getting to work on cleaning the wound and the area around it.
It continues to leak blood, no matter how many times I wipe at it and after a while I just give up, getting right to stitching it up.
âThis might hurt,â I whisper as I press the needle against Oliverâs skin, but he not so much as twitches when the thin metal pierces his skin.
I work in silence, focusing on the work at hand before Oliverâs head rolls to the side to look at me directly as he says, âIâm sorry, Y/N.â
I hum, not taking my eyes off my hands and brush off his words, thinking heâs referring to right now, making me stitch him up and care for him, but then he continues.
âIâm sorry for blowing you off so many times over the last couple of weeks,â he says quietly. âAnd Iâm sorry for cutting you out of my life right before getting on the Gambit with my dad.â
I clench my jaw and finish the last stitch. I stare at my hands and take a deep breath.
I tried to forget about that.
The days before getting onto that cursed yacht with his father, I called Oliver out on his hypocritical behavior and his playboy attitude which lead to him basically ending our friendship.
I cried for days, missing several important college classes, but then the news of the Queenâs Gambit sinking sobered me up and I forgot all about our falling out.
I cried some more then, this time for a different reason, but as time went on I grew numb to it and put all my energy into med school.
âItâs fine. . .â I whisper, moving to get back to work, but Oliver grabs my hand, making me look at him.
âNo,â he says with furrowed eyebrows. âI was such an asshole and you were right. Youâre always right and Iâm really sorry it took me this long to apologize .â
I chuckle weakly, not liking the sudden tension between us and avert my eyes. âIâm not always right,â I argue,
Oliver squeezes my hand, getting me to look at him again. âWell, maybe not. . .â he says with a small smile. âBut you were right about what you said andâ againâ Iâm sorry itâs taken me this long to admit it. I felt backed into a corner when you called me out on my shit and I didnât know what else to do other than lashing out at you.â
âOllieââ I try to stop him, but he cuts me off by squeezing my hand again and continuing.
âY/N. Iâve been through. . . a lot. . . over the last five years, but Iâve also had a lot of time to think andââhe bites the inside of his cheek and scratches at his eyebrow nervouslyâ âand youâre honestly the only constant in my life. The thought of you and sometimeâs even Thea kept me going when I felt like giving up and I swore to myself that if I ever got the chance to, Iâd make things right between us. . . Iâd do what I should have done a long time ago.â
I gulp and try not to pull my hand from his. âWhat are you talking about, Ollie?â
He canât be saying what I think heâs saying, can he?
Oliver sits up, grimacing slightly when the stitches on his waist strain against the movement, and swings his legs over the edge of the bed so heâs sitting next to me.
The heat radiating off his body makes me shiver involuntarily and when he places my hand against the scar on his chest I gasp softly.
âI donât want to spend another day worrying about what ifs and maybes, so Iâm asking you now, Y/N, would you do me the honor of going to dinner with me? As in like, a date, you know?â He stumbles a bit over the end of his sentence but his question takes my breath away nonetheless.
My brows furrow and I feel my heart clench at the conflicting feelings running through me at the moment.
âI donâtâ I donât know,â I admit.
Even though this is all Iâve been hoping for since we were kids, I canât help but have doubts about his intentions.
What if he hasnât changed as much as I think he has? What if heâs still a narcissistic playboy?
I donât know if I could stand being used by him, so I shake my head and move to back away.
Seeing the doubt on my face, Oliverâs eyes soften and his hold on my hand tightens ever so slightly.
âPlease, Y/N this is notâ Iâm not. . .â He trails off, biting his lip in thought.
Then instead of trying to explain himself, he takes a deep breath and closes his eyes briefly.
âThis scar,â he says quietly, pressing my hand against the uneven patch of skin on his chest for emphasis, âis from a guy named Kovar. He. . . tried to stop me from leaving Lian Yu and pressed the hot tip of his gun against my skin, right here.â
My eyes widen, not only because no one knew he wasnât alone on that island, but also because heâs actually telling me what happened.
Since he came back, heâs barely spoken of his time on Lian Yu and the fact that heâs willing to open up about what happened makes me trust his intentions.
He moves my hand down his chest, against a long, gnarly looking scar that follows the downward slope of his ribcage right over his stomach.
âThis one is from when I first stranded on the island. There was this guy, William, or Billy, Winterââ
âNo, Ollie, stop.â I cut him off, shaking my head. âYou donât have to tell me any of this just to prove yourself to me.â
Itâs clear heâs struggling to put into words what happened if his overly tense muscles are anything to go by and I donât want him to feel like heâs forced to share his trauma in order to get me to trust him again.
âBut I want you to know,â he argues weakly, letting go of my hand.
I shake my head and move closer, tracing my fingers along the edge of the scar.
It makes Olive twitch slightly and I smile at the effect I have on him.
âAnd you can,â I assure him, skimming my fingers over his warm skin before brushing over the scar on his hip that looks suspiciously like a shark bite.
What the hell happened to him on that island. . .
âJust not now. Not all at once and not when youâre so obviously not ready to talk about it yet,â I continue, mesmerized by the way his muscles twitch beneath my touch.
I continue exploring his skin, raising an eyebrow at the tattoo on his chest before skipping over it and touching the scar on his shoulder.
They all look like they never healed properly and I get a chill, thinking about the possible infections that could have killed him, but then my train of thought is suddenly silenced when Oliver brushes his lips against my own.
Not realizing how close Iâve gotten while inspecting every little detail about him, I pull back with a surprised squeak and place a hand on his chest to stop him from closing the distance between us again.
âShit,â he whispers, bringing a hand to his lips. âIâm sorry. I shouldnât haveââ
âItâs okay,â I say with a soft chuckle. I take his hand away from his mouth and lace our fingers together. âJust. . . Take me to dinner first.â
Oliverâs cheeks turn red, a rare sight, and I squeeze his hand before straining to press a kiss to his forehead.
âRight. Sorry.â He meets my eyes shyly and I smile at him when he tries to suppress a yawn.
It makes me yawn as well and Oliver gets to his feet. He kisses my knuckles and lets go of my hand.
âI need a shower,â he explains before nervously scratching at his eyebrow again. âWill you still be here when I get out?â
I melt at how vulnerable he sounds and nod, slipping under the covers of his bed. âOnly if you donât take too long.â
Oliverâs eyes widen comically and he springs into action, gathering some clothes before rushing into the bathroom.
________________________________________________
God, the chokehold this manâs got me in. . .
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