#i have like 8000 words written lol

[dpsisquared]

Houses Dimileth sickfic where Byleth falls sick and the only person around to take care of her is FeralMitri

Ooh I kinda sorta wrote a little bit of this! (I don't feel like editing to make sense independently, so in this fic she doesn't remember him when she comes back.)

"Oh, dear," Mercedes said when she saw Byleth's limp form in his arms. She cast a healing spell, and he breathed a sigh of relief when the blood stopped pouring from her wound. "Hm, the rest seems to be magical exhaustion. Can you carry her to the infirmary, Dimitri? I'll be there as soon as I make sure there are no life-threatening injuries to tend to here." Alone in the infirmary, he carefully placed Byleth on a bed and fidgeted. He decided he should put a blanket over her. Whenever he was ill, his parents or nanny always laid him in bed under the covers, so it was probably what you were supposed to do. He rummaged in the cupboards for a blanket. When he went to spread it over her, though, he realized her boots were still on. Taking off someone's boots wasn't intimate, right? No one would want to sleep like that. Gingerly, he sat next to her in the bed and slid her boots off, all too aware that it required him to touch her leg. His gaze roamed up her body, for once not in a lascivious way, but appraisingly. There wasn't any active bleeding, but she was covered in dried blood and grime. Glancing at the blanket again, he sighed. It wouldn't do to put her to bed filthy, either. She's a tool, he reminded himself, a weapon. You have to maintain your weapons. That's all it is. He filled a basin with water, removed her dirty cloak, and wiped down her exposed skin, taking extra care near her healing wound. He brushed out her matted hair. Finally, she was in a state to tuck in so he could be rid of this distraction. Although... He probably shouldn't leave her alone. Pathetic, scoffed Glenn, still a lovesick puppy. For a woman who doesn't even remember you. The battle with Randolph was over, but a new battle was coming to a head. The Dimitri that had loved Byleth was a growing threat to the Dimitri that was committed to the dead. He had listened to the voices when he saw the professor earlier. It was clear something bad had happened, but he didn't offer his help to her. The result was Byleth being injured and unconscious, all to save him. She could have died, and what would that accomplish? Her death would be on his hands just as surely as if he'd swung the axe. It was his punishment to bear, not hers. Then there was the creeping doubt about his ghosts-- a seed that Byleth had planted five years ago that was now coming into bloom. When he had first confided in her about the voices he heard, she had told him of instances of similar afflictions among her father's mercenaries, and gently argued against the critical comments of the ghosts. Her logical, blunt way of speaking was convincing, and he had just started to reconsider his priorities when his stepsister revealed herself. When he lost Byleth, though, any hope of a life for himself tumbled over the cliff with her. Even since they'd reunited, her sensible suggestions had influenced him. She told him that he'd need to eat and train to reach Enbarr, while his ghosts only ever suggested more bloodshed. In five years, he'd achieved nothing but the barest definition of survival, while less than a month after reuniting with Byleth, he had an army and a true chance at striking back. Could he even achieve his revenge listening to his father and Glenn? More likely, he'd challenge a hoard of enemies and die a pointless death long before reaching the emperor. Is that what happened today before Byleth changed fate? Is that perhaps what the ghosts truly wanted? What he truly wanted? No, he wouldn't leave her alone, no matter how it displeased the ghosts. Independent of his confusing feelings, she had proven herself useful and loyal. He dragged a chair next to her bedside and settled in for a long wait.

-----------

"Di-- mitri?" He had sat on the floor with his head laying on the bed, trying to get a bit of rest while still being able to hear her breathing. "I'm here," he said softly, too softly for a monster like him. He was regretting his decision to stay with her. "You're--" she hacked and coughed on her words, so he picked up the glass of water on the table and tipped it into her mouth. Playing house again, I see, sneered his father. She's a tool. He needs her, only as a weapon. "You're okay?" she asked.

[yaminerua]

I'm not too happy with it, but that's what first drafts are for and I'll return to it at some point to fix up what I don't like about it. But I think bc of the nature of the prompt I set my expectations too high bc I wanted to achieve more than I managed with it lol

As always, prompts are by @a-literal-toaster-wtf

anyway the direction it ended up going in the end fits with both the Moonlight and Argue prompts so I'm smushing them together again

Rimmer knows better than to ask if Lister meant it, but his curiosity has other ideas.

Words: 7377

****

The Drive Room was quiet, which was a welcome relief of sorts after the chaos of the previous month.

A lot had happened over a very short period of time and if he was being quite honest with himself, Rimmer hadn’t even really begun to scratch the surface of properly processing most of it.

It had been an emotional rollercoaster from start to finish, a pendulum swinging repeatedly between good and bad so quickly there had been almost no time to process one type of event before it had already wildly switched over to the other, and while the good had only sort of – for the most part – been just ‘okay’, with brief peaks of something genuinely positive occasionally poking out above the mediocrity, the bad had largely ranged from only mildly inconveniencing at its best to genuinely life threatening  at its worst.  This had gone on for a couple of days but it had felt like so much longer.

For Rimmer, personally, it had been utterly exhausting.

He had gone from initially feeling ecstatic, incredible even, at upgrading his hologramatic projection to diamond-light, to almost immediately fearing for his very existence when his lightbee battery had just about burnt itself out trying to maintain it and that had only been the beginning of his troubles.

For the rest of the encounter with the feral cats he had had to remain plugged in to a power socket at all times lest his battery completely deplete and bring his borrowed extra time as a hologram to a humiliating and, this time, very permanent end.

Things had even reached such a low at one point that he, Arnold J. Rimmer, champion of self-preservation over all else, had genuinely considered just giving up.

It had been a strange thing to experience, and an even stranger thing to have Lister try so hard to convince him to change his mind. It hadn’t made sense. The stupid git had always joked about switching him off before but then, when he had actually been ready to let his light go out properly, for good, suddenly it hadn’t seemed so funny to him anymore. Suddenly, he had seemed to put a lot of thought into trying to convince him to stick around.

Certainly, it had worked in the short term. His little moonlight speech had been enough to snap him out of his existential crisis and convince him to keep on going but once the dust had settled on the whole mess and life on board Red Dwarf had begun to return to normal not even being declared a god had been enough to keep doubt from slipping like a traitorous little serpent back into his thoughts.

The fact of the matter was that as heartfelt and moving as Lister’s speech had seemed at the time, now that the danger had passed and Rimmer had the benefit of distance to pick at it and examine it under the negatively-tinted microscope of his own mind, he simply didn’t believe a single damn word of any of it.

Lister had lied to his face to get out of a crisis before, and the memory of that still stung harder than Rimmer would ever like to fully admit. The cold, hollow disappointment that had dropped into his gut when the others had all admitted that they hadn’t meant a word of any of the uplifting positive nonsense they’d tried to feed him on that psi-moon all those years ago still sat heavy like a stone that couldn’t be budged.

He wouldn’t put it past him to do it again. He just knew better than to ask for confirmation. Sometimes it was simply better to assume and never find out for certain, than to ask and be disappointed to learn you were right.

Frowning at the screens agitatedly as he sat at his station on the back right of the Drive Room, Rimmer slid up the sleeve of his tunic to glance at his watch for what felt like the thousandth time and exhaled a sharp, irritated breath through the nose.

The stupid gimboid was late.

It didn’t come as a surprise, of course (Lister was almost always late after all) but it frustrated him nonetheless. He had been sitting waiting for his shift monitoring the screens and supervising Red Dwarf’s course to end for what felt like an eternity now. He was beginning to suspect Lister might have forgotten completely that there even was a shift to take anymore.

Having Holly restored had largely removed the need for them to cycle through shifts at the helm but today had been an exception. Holly was undergoing a full system detox of sorts, mostly to try to reduce the already ridiculous level of slowdown the ancient old computer had been experiencing since being rebooted. It had had something to do with uploading all of his old files again. There was an awful lot of garbage in there to sift through. The long and short of it, however, meant that for a few hours he would be offline and therefore incapable of overseeing the navigation of the ship which in turn meant that it fell to Red Dwarf’s remaining crew to continue to handle things as they had been doing during his prolonged absence and take shifts in the Drive Room until Holly came back online.

Flicking impatiently, restlessly, through the various navigation screens and scan readouts, Rimmer’s frown only continued to darken to a scowl.

There was a moon somewhere up ahead which was anticipated to be a reasonably decent supply of some much-needed raw materials for the ship and they would likely have to make a quick stop to visit it for those very reasons, and that ordinarily wouldn’t be a problem at all but right now any mention of moons only served to drag Rimmer’s mood back to Starbug’s dimly lit cockpit, to thoughts of turning himself off and being done with it all, to the image of Lister’s concerned face trying to make an at the time convincing, heartfelt appeal for him to reconsider.

He wanted to forget about it already, to put it behind him and just lock the bitterness away with everything else but it was still too recent in his memory, still floating around in the forefront of his thoughts whether he wanted it to or not.

The heavy thud of approaching footsteps sounded suddenly behind him and he straightened up in his seat, expression hardening as the familiar sight of a scrappy leather jacket finally came into view.

“What time do you call this?” he snapped furiously, pointing angrily at his watch. “I’ve been waiting nearly twenty minutes for you to come and take your shift!”

Lister simply flashed him a half-apologetic half-apathetic smile and shrugged nonchalantly as he made to take his own seat up front.

“Sorry, man. I lost track of time.”

Rimmer’s nostrils flared, anger igniting like a gas exposed to a flame. “That’s no excuse, Lister! Holly’s system clean-up isn’t scheduled to end for another hour at least so you knew you had to be here! I’d put you on report for this but it wouldn’t be much use would it?”

 “Hey, you’re starting to get it now, aren’t you? Only taken you a couple decades,” Lister said, grinning impishly before brushing the empty snack containers he had left from his last shift off his seat and plopping down heavily with a grunt.

 “Anyway, what’s new? Anythin’ I should know about?”

Rimmer eyed the trash on the floor with disgust, his lip curling, but he bit back the urge to comment on it for now. Kryten could take care of that later if Lister wasn’t going to make the effort to.

“As a matter of fact, yes,” he said stonily, pulling up the display screens at his own station again. “The scanners indicate there’s a small moon up ahead that possesses some useful materials. Probably about 6 hours away at our current speed. We’d be fools not to make use of its resources.”

“Gotcha. When we get within a good range we can nip down in Starbug and grab some, yeah?”

“Yes, try not to be late for that too won’t you, Listy?” Rimmer sneered, eyes boring contemptuously into the back of Lister’s chair.

He could almost hear the infuriating grin in his voice when Lister next spoke, and his hands curled tensely into fists at the sound of it.

“Can’t make any promises, Rimmer.”

He bit back the urge to fire back some sort of retort, instead choosing to roll his eyes and click his tongue and not waste his breath on such a pointless argument. Lister was just trying to wind him up as always. He wouldn’t give him the pleasure of succeeding.

Silence settled on the Drive Room for a few awkward moments during which Lister had expected Rimmer to get up and leave him to it, presumably to go strutting off go reprimand Kryten for something, but the longer the seconds dragged on without him seeming to make any sort of effort to move, the more he wondered why.

“Are you stickin’ around or…?” he asked eventually, peering up at Rimmer’s reflection on one of the darker monitors.

Rimmer answered him without looking up from the current readout he had been skimming over, his tone icy.

“I’m just making sure you’re actually doing your job and not about to fall asleep at the helm again.”

“Hey, that was one time!” Lister cried, positively scandalised even if Rimmer did sort of have a point. “And besides, Holly will be done and back online soon so there’s nothin’ to worry about.”

“Even so, Lister, it only takes a moment of inattention to bring about catastrophe.”

Lister fought the impulse to roll his eyes. “I’m not gonna fall asleep, okay? I’ve already had me nap. That’s why I was late in the first place.”

“Well, see to it that you don’t, alright?”

“Alright!”

“Good.”

With that, Rimmer promptly stood up, brushed the creases out of his blue tunic and turned swiftly to leave. He’d almost made it completely through the doorway and into the hallway beyond when he froze mid-step and paused, seized by a sudden irrepressible urge to do the one thing he had told himself over and over that he wasn’t going to do, to ask the one question that had been roiling unpleasantly in his gut for the last few weeks and which he had desperately tried to tell himself he didn’t want to know – didn’t need to know – the answer to.

The two of them were alone now, with no likely interruptions expected for a while yet, which only made the temptation harder to resist.

Lister seemed to have noticed his hesitation, turning slightly in his seat to peer curiously over his shoulder. “Rimmer?” he said uncertainly.

Rimmer’s fingers tightened where they rested against the doorframe, gripping the metal so hard his nails could have left indents, his mind fighting a losing battle against his own burgeoning ill-advised curiosity.

He knew better than to ask this, he tried to tell himself firmly. He knew better than to repeat the past and seek confirmation of something he already knew without being told. He knew better…

Apparently he didn’t know better.

Sucking in a shaky, tense breath, trying to steady himself ahead of what was sure to be inevitable disappointment, he let it out harshly and turned his head, only a fraction, back in Lister’s direction.

“It was a load of old tot wasn’t it?” he asked, feeling the knot of anxiety twist and coil unpleasantly in his gut, hearing the tight, strained quality that had entered his voice.

Lister blinked blankly for a moment, not understanding.

“What was?”

“What you said back on Starbug!” Rimmer snapped, all pretence of self-restraint and cool control dissolving instantly as he whipped round to fix Lister with the full weight of his glare. “On the desert moon. You only said that to keep me from offing myself.”

Understanding dawned on Lister’s features and dropped into his stomach with all the putrid unpleasantness of a bad curry coming back to haunt him. He shrugged stiffly, trying to shake off some of the tension that had suddenly gathered in his shoulders.

“Well, yeah,” he began, already dreading where this conversation was going. “But—”

“You just cobbled it together from some of your corny old movies,” Rimmer cut in, ignoring him, the bitterness in his tone so palpable he could almost taste it in the air. “Didn’t mean a word of it did you?”

Lister brought a thumb and forefinger up to pinch his nose in resigned aggravation. He’d just woken up. He didn’t need to deal with this.

“Where is this coming from, Rimmer?”

“You know fine well where it’s coming from, Lister!” Rimmer all but spat, his features distorted, brows furrowed deeply over dark, scowling eyes. “You were just trying to come up with something to make me feel better in the moment. Just saying whatever you thought would work.” He narrowed his eyes and swallowed hard, the muscle in his jaw flexing visibly with tension.

“Just like on that psi-moon,” he added coldly, acrimoniously.

“Oh smeggin’ hell, Rimmer,” Lister groaned, shaking his head and dragging the hand at his nose down his face raggedly. “Not this again… That was decades ago!”

“And I’m expected to believe things have changed since them, am I?” Rimmer scoffed derisively, raising a dismissive eyebrow in dubious disbelief. “That you aren’t still capable of lying boldly to my face and then taking it all back once the danger’s passed and you can drop the pretence?”

“Rimmer, I wasn’t—”

“You just didn’t want to have to feel guilty if you let it happen did you? Any other day of the week you just can’t wait to let me know exactly how much you want to get rid of me!”

Lister stared incredulously down at the controls in front of him. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He knew fine well the kind of mental acrobatics Rimmer could perform in his own mind in order to twist and distort things to make himself miserable but he had really thought, really had hoped that that little moment on Starbug had been a step forwards for both of them. Now it seemed he had been sorely mistaken. Even after that, even after the trouble he had gone to to try to get through to him, Rimmer still couldn’t seem to accept anything other than abject contempt as fact.

He sighed, sitting back defeated in his chair, not willing to look Rimmer in the eye.

“But I don’t want that,” he said quietly, more softly than he intended to, the ridiculousness of this entire conversation weighing down heavily on him leaving him world-weary and exhausted.

Rimmer’s features twitched into an indignant snarl.

“Yes you do!” he snapped, and Lister let out a loud, audible groan of exasperation at that.

“No,” he responded firmly, insistently. “I don’t.”

Rimmer didn’t say anything for a good few moments. His expression was livid, nostrils set to maximum flare as his whole face seemed to contort around his curled lip and scrunched up nose. He rolled his jaw from side to side, tight and stiff, sucking his lips in over his teeth before opening his mouth with a pointed click of the tongue.

“Well, you certainly did before,” he said eventually, his voice hard and flat.

Lister frowned, confused, and finally turned around to look Rimmer incredulously in the eye, holding his dark, accusatory stare evenly.

“What? When?”

“All those times you threatened to turn me off in favour of swapping in Kochanski,” Rimmer said matter-of-factly, like it was obvious. “How about that?”

“Rimmer, that was years ag—”

“Or how about when I went away, then – as Ace or with the Quantum Skipper?” he cut in, not allowing Lister even the slightest moment to get another word out. “You didn’t try to stop me there, did you laddo? In fact you seemed quite happy to watch me go, get me out of your hair. ‘So long smeghead and good riddance!’” He accompanied that last remark with an exaggerated, sarcastic wave of the hand, his voice momentarily switching to a mocking mimicry of Lister’s accent before his expression hardened back into embittered, icy scorn. “I bet you celebrated for weeks.”

Lister looked at him, flabbergasted and speechless, beside himself with disbelief at this point. How long had he been holding onto all this anger for? He’d never let on about any of it before. How was Lister supposed to know this was how he’d really felt about all that the whole time?

“Rimmer, I thought you wanted to go?” he stated, quite unsure of what else to say.

Evidently, it had been the wrong thing to go with.

“Of course I didn’t want to go you stupid goit!” Rimmer shouted, brandishing a furious hand around, gesturing wildly, his voice pitching upwards into something almost hysterical. “Why would I want to do any of that? Go off and get myself killed gallivanting around as a ridiculous-looking poncy git? No thanks. Not for me.”

Lister could feel his resolve waning under the weight of Rimmer’s reproachful, unwaveringly accusatory stare. It was like talking to a brick wall, and maybe the brick wall might have listened to him better.

Rimmer was near-incandescent rage, his eyes positively burning with a sour, hurt kind of fury that had clearly been smouldering away in secret for years waiting for a chance to erupt. Now that it was forcing its way out and dredging things up from long ago to shed light on them again in new and unexpected ways, Lister didn’t really know what to say.

He tried to heave an apologetic shrug, but nothing really felt sincere enough to make a dent in Rimmer’s rancour.

“Sorry, man. I didn’t know.”

“Poppycock!” Rimmer spat, and the immense pressure, the seething venom behind it almost made Lister flinch. “You couldn’t wait to get rid of me! You made it perfectly clear on that psi-moon that absolutely none of you like me and not a thing has changed! There I was, ready to turn myself off and be done with it all and you still couldn’t say it. You had to go and make Kryten give the most unconvincing nod the entire universe has ever seen! And then when that failed you threw together some nonsense to do the job instead!”

“It wasn’t nonsense!” Lister all but shouted back, defiant, but it was useless in the face of Rimmer’s stubborn, pig-headed belief in his own version of events.

“Of course it was nonsense, Lister! Flowery words to make me feel like I had some worth! And I went along with it for a while but I knew better than to fall for your little ‘moonlight analogy.’” He brought two fingers up to punctuate those last words contemptuously with air quotes. “I knew you didn’t really mean it. I just knew better this time than to ask.”

“Rimmer—” Lister began, but he barely managed to get another word out before Rimmer steamrolled over him again.

“Just admit it, Lister! Be honest for once in your stupid, pathetic life!”

With a sharp, echoic crack, Lister’s patience snapped and his whole face crumpled into a scowl, fingers curling around the edge of his seat, digging into the fabric.

“What,” he growled, his tone challenging, combative, his eyes wide and piercing beneath his deeply furrowed brows. “You’d rather I didn’t give a smeg then? You’d rather I hadn’t bothered at all?”

Rimmer’s expression faltered, briefly, wavering under the intensity of Lister’s stare but he recovered himself quickly and returned his gaze in kind, holding steady.

 “I’d rather you’d meant it—” he began, pressing on uninhibited as Lister tried to interject.

“I did—”

“—but you don’t and I’ve had long enough to rationalise that myself now so there’s no point pretending anymore. Just admit it.”

Lister huffed a sigh, harsh and tired and strained, and with it he felt all the fight drain out of him.

“Rimmer. I meant it,” he said, and suddenly his voice sounded small, almost desperate.

“But—”

“I meant it.”

There was a sense of finality to Lister’s tone as he uttered those words and lowered himself slowly back down onto his chair, a dangerously warning edge to his voice that demanded that Rimmer stop talking nonsense and listen to him, and Rimmer found himself feeling decidedly off-balance all of a sudden, the overwhelming burn of sincerity in the dark brown of Lister’s eyes catching him off-guard and extinguishing whatever biting, sceptical remark had been waiting to climb its way out of his throat next.

In an instant, all that pent-up anger and unrestrained bitterness seemed just to evaporate into thin air, leaving Rimmer a gaping, wordless husk, too beside himself with disbelief to even begin to string together the words necessary to formulate any kind of response at all, let alone a refutation of Lister’s claim.

He had been so confident in his belief that Lister couldn’t possibly have meant a word of anything he had said, had even expected him to agree with him as easily as he had once before, so this continued, defiant refusal to yield to Rimmer’s accusations was quite the unexpected surprise. He hadn’t expected him to fight back quite so passionately. It was enough to almost make him question whether he had somehow got it wrong.

Feeling decidedly unsteady all of a sudden, Rimmer walked stiffly over to the navigation console and lowered himself heavily, somewhat dazedly, into the vacant seat to Lister’s right, where the Cat usually sat.

He didn’t meet Lister’s gaze, the intensity of it now too great to look at directly. Instead, he looked down at his hands, clasped tightly as they were on the edge of the console desk, knuckles blooming white with tension. He ran the argument through his head again, trying to find holes to pick in it but the more he replayed it the more unshakably resolute Lister seemed. He’d never seen him look quite so gravely serious before.

Beside him, he heard Lister let out a drawn-out, long-suffering exhale and could see out of the corner of his eye the way he repositioned himself to face the front again, busying himself with various screens and displays, trying to shake off the uncomfortable tension that had wound up tight like a spring inside him.

In spite of Lister’s unyielding insistence in his own sincerity, Rimmer still couldn’t quite find it within him to believe it. Not fully. Not yet. There were still too many things he couldn’t make sense of, things he needed more satisfactory answers for.

He swallowed thickly, the tightness in his throat still, as of now, unwilling to abate.

“You said you needed me,” he said quietly, after a protracted, suffocating silence, his expression pinching into something confused yet desperate to understand. “But I went away before and you were fine. You didn’t need me then.”

Lister exhaled slowly through the nose but it wasn’t the same aggravated sigh as he had let out a few moments ago. This time there was something oddly distant, oddly gentle about it.

“You don’t know that,” he said quietly, fingers flexing nervously on the console controls, eyes fixed deliberately on any space other than Rimmer’s face. “Maybe that’s when I realised I did.”

Rimmer’s brow furrowed slightly, pondering the implication of Lister’s words.

“So, what, you’re saying you missed me?” he asked, incredulous, already beginning to feel the acidic burn of bitter resentment growing in his gut once more. “You actually expect me to believe that? How stupid do you think I am, Lister? Why would you miss me? You don’t even like me!”

Lister’s voice remained low, calm, defeated in a disarmingly honest way that Rimmer didn’t quite know how to take.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought too,” he said with a half-hearted shrug. “But it’s true, man. I don’t know what else to tell you.”

Rimmer mulled it over, really gave it some thought and tried to consider taking Lister at his word, but the more he tried to make sense of it the more he felt like he was adding two plus two and ending up with three plus change.

“But it doesn’t make sense!” he cried, shaking his head vehemently and finally turning his head to face Lister again. “You compared yourself with the Sun but the Sun doesn’t need the Moon! The Sun shines on its own power. I doesn’t need any help from some dull, dead little space rock.”

Lister didn’t say anything but Rimmer saw his eyes momentarily flit in his direction and the anxious, unsettled way his adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as he swallowed and he felt a miserable little pang of triumph at feeling as though he had finally backed Lister into a corner he couldn’t talk his way out of.

A self-satisfied, condescending little smile pulled at the edges of Rimmer’s mouth but it didn’t reach his eyes.

“So tell me, then, Listy,” he began, straightening up to fix Lister with a cold, interrogatory stare. “What does the Sun need the Moon for that it can’t get anywhere else? What would the Sun be without the Moon?”

He waited a moment, watching the way Lister’s jaw set and the way he closed his eyes and breathed in a steadying, shaky little breath and his eyes flashed with bittersweet satisfaction at his own petty little victory.

He opened his mouth to speak, to discredit any argument that might seek to say the Sun got anything beneficial from the Moon’s presence, but whatever words he had been going to say never made it out into open air.

The moment he had so much as sucked in the breath, Lister cut in, curt and blunt, knocking all the wind out of Rimmer’s sails with a single word:

“Lonely.”

Rimmer blinked, mouth hanging open uselessly until he found the presence of mind to remember to close it. “What?” he asked, tentative, uncertain he had heard him right.

Lister opened his eyes and there was something pained in his expression, something so achingly sincere as he spoke his next words that Rimmer found that he genuinely, honestly didn’t know what to say in response.

“The Sun would be lonely,” he said again, and something strange flipped in Rimmer’s chest at the sound of it.

What? Lonely? That didn’t make any sense. Lister hadn’t been alone. If anything Rimmer had been the one on his own, jumping uselessly from universe to universe deeply regretting ever having left his old one behind, mourning the very real possibility of never seeing it ever again. Lister was saying he’d felt lonely? What a load of utter nonsense. He’d had Cat and Kryten. And Kochanski! He had been the farthest thing from alone!

“But…” Rimmer started, floundering helplessly for something to say. “But there are still other planets…”

“Yeah, but they’re not the Moon are they?”

Lister turned to face him then, an odd, tender shimmer in his eyes, the faintest hints of a gentle smile playing at the corners of his mouth. He looked tired, resigned, but there was an openness to his expression that Rimmer wasn’t used to seeing, like he had pulled back the shutters to give him a glimpse of something he hadn’t been aware of the existence of before.

“And there’s a difference is there?” Rimmer asked, his voice suddenly tight with the tension of trying to fight the traitorous little tremor that threatened to worm its way into it.

Lister held his gaze evenly, letting his shoulders slacken slightly as he let out another deep, defeated exhale.

“Yeah…”

So Rimmer had been wrong. It felt strange to have to accept it, felt impossible even now to really comprehend that there had perhaps been genuine truth to Lister’s little pep talk after all and that it hadn’t just been a string of nonsense he’d thrown together to deal with a crisis. He had meant what he’d said about Rimmer being something he needed to keep around, something that had become genuinely vital to his own continued existence, exactly as Holly had said he would be.

Rimmer didn’t know how he felt about that. His artificial heart ached in his chest, too overwhelmed to really take it all in quite yet, but at the same time still too doubtful to fully believe it. He’d been let down before, hurt by the withholding of open affection too many times to count, and even after all this he was still waiting for the other shoe to drop, for the inevitable let down that he had been pessimistically anticipating this whole time.

“So you need me then…” he said slowly, surrendering to allow himself at least to accept that as a concept, however incredible it still seemed. “But you still don’t like me.”

“I like you just fine, Rimmer.”

The admission was so staggeringly unexpected it almost winded him. That strange little agonised pang seared across Rimmer’s chest again and he hated the way he recognised it as the desperate tug of hope in the face of something utterly unbelievable. His lip curled.

“Now I know you’re lying,” he said coldly, dismissively.

“I’m not!” Lister said, eyes wide and earnest.

“Then why couldn’t you say it before? Back then? When I was about to throw everything away? I gave you numerous opportunities to say it, Lister. To name me one person on this stupid smegging ship who likes me and you didn’t say it.”

“Because I knew you wouldn’t believe me if I did, you daft smegger.”

A little ring of truth, hollow and undeniable, rang through Rimmer’s mind there and he couldn’t find it in him to try to deny it. Of course that was true. What reason did he have to believe otherwise?

He didn’t say anything in response and Lister regarded him for a long, quiet minute before inclining his head in a half-shrug and looking down to fiddle idly with a fraying thread from his gloves.

“Listen, Rimmer, I know you,” he said quietly. “You wouldn’t have listened to me. I had to find another way to get through to you and I just thought, you know, after what the Cat said to you earlier that maybe moonlight was the way to go.”

He shot a glance in Rimmer’s direction again, casting his gaze over the rigid, wound-up tension in his form, the tight line of his jaw, the deep crease in his brow, the doubtful, desperate look in his eyes. He thought back to those moments on the psi-moon what felt like a lifetime ago now, ran his mind over the things he had said, the strange race in his pulse that had jolted rapidly into existence as he’d reached out to touch a man he’d never thought he’d come to care about. He hadn’t fully been lying back then, it had just been much easier to take it back than to lean into it, to pretend he hadn’t meant a word of it.

Look where that had got them now. 

“I wasn’t tryin’ to lie to you, Rimmer. Not this time.”

Rimmer stared at him for a good long while, hazel eyes searching every last minuscule part of his expression, trying to find some indicator of deception, some tiny shred of dishonesty. He felt a little lost, a little out of sorts, like he was floating adrift in unfamiliar seas with no clue how best to proceed. He didn’t know how to navigate any of this anymore.

They had never been this honest with each other before. It had always been something of a standoffish, antagonistic relationship that they had had over the years, pockmarked with all the scars of distrust and petty jabs. Every scrap of vulnerability, of open emotional honesty, had been forced out by the emergence of dire circumstances or had slipped out, unbidden, unfiltered, whilst in an alcohol induced haze.

They had danced around addressing those deeper layers, those moments of almost genuine connection, the missed opportunities for closeness, and had largely remained stubbornly reticent, reluctant to stop hiding behind the familiar safety of the old pattern, to dare to really try meet each other where they were.

They had known each other for so long, and yet only now did it seem they were even beginning to make any sort of progress, to start to peel away the top layers, prickly and defensive as they were, and see what more lay underneath.

Still, it was hard to shake off what has long-since been the previously established norm, to try to slot something new and unfamiliar into the picture.

“I still don’t believe you,” Rimmer said quietly and Lister nodded, solemnly understanding.

“I know.”

Silence, heavy and thick, settled over them like a suffocating blanket, the weight of all of the revelations hanging suspended in the air between them, crystalising into something more solid, more real, with each passing second as it gradually, finally began to sink in. 

Lister sounded so remorseful, so regretful of his past actions, so sincere in his wish to be believed now and Rimmer was almost ready to actually consider it, to risk trusting him again, just this once. What good did it do Lister to admit to something like this, after all? After all this time, why try to swim against the flow, to change the dynamic? What did he gain from it? Why lie about something like this… unless it wasn’t a lie?

He liked him? Lister liked him? In spite of all their complicated, smegged up history, in spite of all the ire and bitterness and petty disputes and rancorous arguments, in spite of every foul word or contemptuous look he’d ever shot at him, Lister somehow, in his own perplexing little way, had come to like him. And he had missed him when he had gone away.

Something light and fluttery flitted around in Rimmer’s chest, making him feel decidedly light-headed all of a sudden, a bewildering feeling after the grim, heavy weight this whole conversation had been. He felt, tentatively, looser somehow, unburdened by the crushing pressure of his own doubts and insecurities whispering in his ear, telling him he was worthless and despised. Lister had no reason to stand his ground and defend his word unless he really had meant something by it and that knowledge was something of a comfort, a warm little nugget of hope that maybe he could trust him on this one little thing if nothing else.

Beside him, Lister shifted in his seat, stretching his shoulders and rolling his neck before settling back against the padded backrest and breathing out deeply. He seemed largely to have shaken off most of the discomfort of the last tense few minutes, confident that the worst of it had passed now.

He cleared his throat and decided to test whether the waters had calmed enough to return to some sort of normalcy again.

“Hey, since you’re still here, d’you mind checking the console on Cat’s side?” he said, tilting his head slightly to his right but keeping his eyes on the screens in front of him. “Think a few things were on the fritz there the other day.”

Rimmer’s face opened with alarm, eyes widening and regarding the console in front of him in horrified disbelief. “What!?” he cried, utterly appalled at the lazy lack of urgency Lister seemed to show towards the situation. “And you didn’t think to mention it? Or even try to fix it yourself?”

Lister shrugged, raising his hands innocently to brush off the responsibility. “Hey, man, don’t look at me! It’s the Cat’s station! I don’t use it!” His lips quirked into an impish, lop-sided grin as he turned and indicated with his eyes towards the console again. “Just give it a look over will you since I’m obviously very importantly busy here.”

He poked his tongue out teasingly beneath his teeth and Rimmer rolled his eyes at him and shook his head, peering down to get a better look at whatever it was Lister believed was wrong with it.

“God, I have to do everything around here, don’t I?” he muttered, but it was only half-hearted. In actual fact he was quite relieved to have left the tense atmosphere behind and lapsed back into something more comfortably familiar. “Where is it?”

“It’s there, Rimmer. You’ll see it.”

Rimmer frowned, sensing something odd, playful, in Lister’s tone and he straightened up to regard him suspiciously, an eyebrow quirked high on his brow.

“Lister… I don’t see anything wrong with any of the controls.”

The smile on Lister’s face only broadened and there was a twinkle in his eye as he shot Rimmer a faux-apologetic look.

“Must’ve been my mistake then.”

“Clearly.”

“You can keep lookin’ if you want.”

“I’ll pass.”

That was what he said, but for a good several seconds more Rimmer did still cast his gaze one last time across the whole console just in case there really had been something he’d missed.

Finding nothing, he sat back the chair and pondered, belatedly, whether Lister had just been messing with him, deliberately trying to steer them away from the uncomfortable precipice of vulnerability they had previously been balancing precariously at the edge of.

He had to admit the familiarity of their usual level of bickering was a welcome return to normalcy after how tense and uncomfortable the last while had been. It had toed a line there, taken a tentative step over a border neither of them usually went anywhere near. Things were out in the open now that hadn’t been made clear before. Something important had changed. It just goes to show just how long they’d been stuck in this situation together by now. Even the most stubborn immovable souls in the universe could begin to grow if given half a chance and a couple of decades.

He should really be going right about now. He had already wasted far too much time lingering about in here and he had plenty of other things he ought to be getting on with but somehow he found himself loathe to peel himself away, content to sit in the little bubble of quiet a little longer.

Lister was humming now, some tuneless little ditty, and he was drumming his fingers on the console absent-mindedly as he flicked through different display screens that only continued to read the same as they had before. For all that he was getting on in years, there were still many things about him that hadn’t changed. He still left a mess wherever he went, still turned up late to his shifts and lost interest real quick if things weren’t interesting enough to hold his attention, and he still drove him up the wall with his terrible singing and mediocre guitar playing.

Rimmer would never admit it, not even if he was dying a second, permanent death, but he had missed this. He had Lister’s stupid, deeply frustrating personality more than he had expected to while he’d been away and there was something pleasantly surprising to find after all this time that the feeling had in fact been mutual after all.

God, the effort it had taken to even get to the point where that could be made known, though.

Rimmer huffed a short, sharp little breath and regarded Lister again, straightening up in his chair.

“Lister,” he made to say, but whatever had been about to follow never made it out.

One of the screens in the middle of the console flashed suddenly and a familiar gormless old face flickered into view, the tired lines of his mouth pulling up in the faintest of smiles.

“What’s happenin’, dudes? What’d I miss?”

Lister’s face broke out into a wide grin at the greeting. “Hol! You’re back online!” he exclaimed, a barely disguised note of relief in his voice.

“That I am, Dave,” Holly said with a self-satisfied little nod. “Clean and fresh and fully operational.”

Rimmer rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest, shaking his head. “Sure, if you can call what you are these days ‘fully operational’…” he muttered.

“You what? Are you doubting my superior capabilities again, Arnold?”

Rimmer made to respond but Lister waved him silent. “Rimmer, don’t get him started,” he said before turning to Holly again and loading up a few screens. “Here, Hol, there’s a moon up ahead with some useful resources. Think you can get us close enough to it on your own?”

Holly’s brow furrowed into a frown at the very thought that such a request would be troublesome for him.

“Sure can, Dave,” he said confidently. “Could even do it with me eyes closed.”

“Please don’t…” Rimmer groaned, bringing up a hand to pinch the bridge of his nose frustratedly.

“And speakin’ of moons,” Lister said, pulling himself up out of his chair and leaning forwards to give Rimmer a firm, friendly pat on the shoulder. “There’s a moon in here too that needs to loosen up a bit. C’mon, Rimmer, let’s leave it to Holly.”

“But—”

“Come on!”

He was reluctant to obey but somehow felt himself being tugged along anyway, drawn away by something intangible and invisible but powerful all the same. It was like being caught in a gravitational pull, like being dragged into the orbit of something too irresistible to break away from and it hadn’t even been the first time that had happened.

Every time he had tried to go away before, to leave in search of something better, he had always felt himself being inexplicably drawn back, returning without fail to the comforting – if highly aggravating – familiarity of being in Lister’s company.

Maybe Lister had been onto something with the whole Sun and Moon thing, about him being moonlight. Maybe he really was a moon, tethered to the pull of its nearby sun. Maybe he was the light that existed because of that.

He had always assumed that if Lister had meant what he had said at all then he had surely meant it literally; that Rimmer was the moonlight emitted from a lightbee moon to reflect back the memories of the Rimmer that Lister had once known but he wondered now whether there had been more to it than that – whether moonlight encapsulated something more, something broader about their relationship to one another.

Perhaps it wasn’t just him that moonlight represented but them, the sum of the two and everything that they made together by being in each other’s company, both the good and the bad.

Moonlight was the arguing and petty bickering, the sarcasm and the scorn, but it was also in the quiet admissions and personal stories, in the knowing looks and rare smiles. It was David Lister and Arnold Rimmer and everything that passed in between. It was something that had been sorely missing when he had been away, something that couldn’t exist without both of them.

“The Sun can’t make moonlight without the Moon, and the Moon can’t make moonlight without the Sun, so who’s making the moonlight?”

“They both are…”

As Rimmer followed Lister out of the Drive Room, let himself be pulled along into his orbit as always, he felt himself begin to feel lighter than he had felt in some time, the bitter weight of all that doubt he had been holding onto since that night stranded beneath the sands of the desert moon falling away with every step, and when Lister turned to flash that same old gerbil-like grin he’s always worn, he found himself momentarily dazzled by it, felt something warm and pleasant bloom suddenly in his chest, radiating out to fill every last bit of him, warming him from the inside out.

Distantly, as the unconscious beginnings of an unwitting smile began to tug on the corners of his lips, Rimmer thought – with a note of fondness he would surely come to anxiously ponder the meaning of later – that the sun suited Lister rather well.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

reading roundup: April 2024

oh my god you guys I've read SO MUCH this month!!! I got BIG into reread N.K. Jemisin's tremendous Broken Earth trilogy and it's been jaw-dropping, and I have been reading a HEAP of comics and manga a

on the extremely off chance there's anyone following me who doesn't think comics, manga, graphic novels, etc don't count as "real reading" lmao lol get out of here??? you're on the Reading 1000s of Pages of Old Batman Comics blog. go feel the whimsy of reading a whole graphic novel in one afternoon and maybe you'll calm down.

ANYWAY!!! what have we been reading?

Earthdivers Vol. 1: Kill Columbus (Stephen Graham Jones, Davide Gianfelice, Joana Lafuente, 2023) - Stephen Graham Jones is one of my all-time favorite authors, and I was super excited to check out his first comic series. Earthdivers takes place in the wasteland of the 22nd century, where four Native survivors have hatched a plan to try to stop the disasters that are killing the world: use a time-travelling cave to send one of their number back in time to kill Columbus before he can launch the colonization of North America. it's a one-way trip, and the time traveler will have to be ruthless to achieve their goal. beyond the attention-grabbing hook of killing Columbus, this story dives (you see what I did there) deep into an exploration of what it means to sacrifice everything for a cause and find the will to be ruthless in pursuit of the greater good. I'm not 100% sure I tracked all of the twisting threads of time travel in this first volume, but the hook is compelling and Gianfelice's art is beautiful, so I'm really looking forward to seeing the series progress!

Spoiler Alert (Olivia Dade, 2020) - at this point I've written 8000+ words about this book on my patreon and it's becoming difficult to figure out what else to say or how to say it briefly. this book ties itself up in knots with its contrivances and makes both of its protagonists look dumb in the process. I don't like either of these people but - spoiler alert! - I still think April can and should do better. Olivia Dade please call me I just want to talk.

Delicious in Dungeon Vol. 1-3 (Ryoko Kui, trans. Yen Press, 2017) - I don't need to explain Dungeon Meshi. surely you've seen the gifs of Dungeon Meshi. all that matters is that I fucking love Dungeon Meshi, this shit rules and it's going to be so hard to hold off on reading Volume 4 while I try to prioritize some other books first. this world is great, the characters are a delight and a joy, and the way that Kui is so fascinated by the food and biology and exploration of adventurer fantasy tropes in her world makes my brain go wheeeeeeeeee!!! I'm having so much fun.

The Fifth Season (N.K. Jemisin, 2015) - historically I've very seldom reread books, but I'm starting to think that I need to change my stance on that. revisiting the Fifth Season years after I first read it, with the time to really enjoy it and also the maturity and perspective to actually appreciate what Jemisin is cooking, has enhanced the experience immeasurably. a thing that really struck me this time was how artfully Jemisin depicts the way orogenes are conditioned and groomed from the jump to be subservient and scared and willing to settle for life at the margins of society; it's not something that I could totally understand the nuances of when I read this book fresh out of my first year of college. this novel and its sequels are so brilliantly devastating, I cannot say enough great things about them.

My Pancreas Broke, But My Life Got Better (Nagata Kabi, trans. Jocelyne Allen 2022) - I did it, I'm officially caught up on all of Nagata's works that have been translated into English! and man, I'm still worried about her. the experience of reading My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness hasn't quite been replicated for me; I think that was a once in a lifetime event, although I've certainly found a lot that I relate to in Nagata's subsequent struggles to sort of out anxiety, independence, art, and figuring out what kind of relationships she event wants to have in her life. at this point I feel like I'm just reading the illustrated life updates from a friend I haven't seen in a long time who stresses me out because her life is a mess. which is still interesting! but god I hope something good happens to this woman soon.

The Obelisk Gate (N.K. Jemisin, 2016) - The Fifth Season is a book about the end of the world and of one woman's personal apocalypses that happened prior to that. its sequel, the Obelisk Gate, is a book that's extremely preoccupied with the tedium of figuring out how to run a halfway-functioning society in the midst of the apocalypse, which is genuinely fascinating stuff. and it's also a book about the fear and desperation and sheer levels of exhaustion that might drive someone to decide that, fuck it, maybe the world should end and we should be done with all of this, actually. it's also a book about devotion and dependence and destruction and devouring people you love in a VERY literal way, which it must be said is pretty sexy. the stuff that pops off between Essun and Hoa in this book makes me think of Octavia Butler in the best way; I think she would have adored them. I'm so excited to get to the final book and see how this all pays off, because the first time I read it I barely understood a single goddamn thing that was happening.

I Hate This Place Vol. 1-2 (Kyle Starks, Artyom Toplin, Lee Loughridge, 2022-2023) - a short and spooky comic series that wraps up in two tight little volumes. I have some gripes with the pacing, but it makes for a fun afternoon read. a mid-tier streaming service is going to adapt this into a live action series within a couple of years, mark my worms. personally I'm fancasting Mackenzie Davis as Gabby and Samira Wiley as Trudy.

[plothooksinc]

For the WIP meme: 🗣️ 📄 ❔ 🤔

🗣️Talk about your favourite WIP

This is actually super hard. Like I love all my WIPs! (Nobody ask me which WIP I hate b/c the answer is "lol none"). Picking a favourite... well, Infinite Ricochet is the easiest to write currently and I'm looking forward to making readers scream dropping the actual plot, but.

But.

I just finished a reread of The Zaibatsu Project and honestly, cyberpunk samurai? I have so much going on in this and I'm proud of myself for taking a bunch of 19th century characters and going "nope you're all from 2029 now" and realising just how much plot I had on the go and that, actually, the last chapter I put up wasn't so terrible or poorly received after all (and I'm struggling to work out why I ever thought that.) It reminded me where I was going with it and I am very encouraged, and it is by far my most ambitious WIP and if Watsuki hadn't taken a sledgehammer to everyone's motivation to do anything with the Ruroken fandom I might actually write this a lot faster than, uh, one chapter every three years '_' Anyway, yes. Cyberpunk samurai, choc full of The Cure references, chess references, and conspiracy theories that drove people nuts on LJ back in the day back when I was writing it in serial installments. <3

📄What’s a WIP you never finished that you would like to go back and revisit?

All of them. But as I've been asked this one multiple times, let's go with Snowblind. It's the closest to being finished out of all of them, and the last time I updated I got a reviewer in her 70s going "Please don't take another 13 years to update, I probably wont' be here to read it," sob. So I whittle away some time on this one. (On them all, actually. While I'm focused mostly on Infinite Ricochet, I have indeed written 1-2 pages on everything else on my way through.)

❔Choose a random WIP and talk about it.

Infinite Ricochet, unlike its predecessor, is a sprawling take-your-time fic wherein there is a plot and I'm slowly going to keep ratcheting up the tension until people are screaming on the rollercoaster all the way down, but I wanna take time to explore relationships along the way. Like I set up certain dynamics in NRFTW that I want to play with. Literally reconstructed one of the main characters. Gave them all even more trauma! I sort of left off with one open plot thread on NRFTW deliberately which could have been left open ended, but then I thought of a bunch of other stuff and went "...hey, what if." And it's messy. It's so messy here at the start because I'm trying to lay the foundations for everything that comes later, and there's a lot that comes later. So sometimes I'm like "...is this scene really necessary" but also "no I can't jump straight to the plot because pacing let's let them breathe first" but also "oh god, the characters are talking again and I can't get them to shut up." And then trying to get from these personality/foundation-laying scenes to pick up speed with actual plot relevant stuff is surprisingly hard?

My outline for Infinite Ricochet is 8000 words long. And it's only two thirds of the fic, because at that point I went "...and by the time I get to this point the plot will look entirely different" so I stopped. Safe to say I have a lot planned. And if I can get it to work I (and hopefully everyone else) will have so much fun (for a given definition of fun), but it feels a little right now like trying to herd cats so. Wish me luck. 8|

🤔Do you have an WIPs where you wish you had chosen a different fandom/character?

Nope! I'm not a hugely prolific writer, so any time I do start publishing a fic I've already thought long and hard about my choices. Places, everyone.

Thank you!

WIP meme questions here.

[ashtraythief]

The fact that Underneath is the first fic you’ve written is so crazy to me. I remember reading it before you edited it, and it did not give me first fic vibes in the slightest. You knew how to write really awesome banter and great storylines even back then on your first fic! Okay, that’s talent. I can’t remember if you talked about this, but how did you get the idea for Underneath? Was it something you were thinking about for years before? Where did you get the idea to have Jensen keep this big secret?

Aww thank you, nonnie, that's so lovely of you to say! ♥️ To be fair though, even then I had a couple of people who helped brainstorm and shape this fic. I remember when Aly told me to cut 8000 words because they sucked. That hurt 😅 (she said it more nicely and it was ultimately the right decision but it still sucks lol)

So when I started Underneath I was watching a lot of White Collar, Burn Notice, and Leverage and I was obsessed with the whole undercover thing. And I think I read a fanfic where one of them was undercover? I think? I went back years ago to try to find it, but I couldn't so I honestly don't know if I imagined that fic lol. But I think that all made the perfect storm and mob fic was at its height back then too, so somehow this was the locigal conclusion. And I really liked the idea of the inner conflict and everything being gray instead of black and white. And then it took on a life of its own. And here we are 😅

[tomato-fendo-writes]

Fun Fax: OLM Chapter 7

this. freaking. CHAPTER. being the first foray into the “slice of life land,” it drove me half INSANE and it was left unfinished until i was done drafting up to chapter TEN. truly embarrassing how hard this chapter was to write, as i had so many doubts and tiny rewrites that i wanted to scrap the whole thing multiple times hsdjkfd

again i was wrestling the timeline like an animal during this chapter but i landed on something im okay with sdjf. was gonna be 2 weeks into their stay instead of 1!

Jin and Kaz’s conversation was rewritten and tweaked more times than i can count 💀 could not decide how i wanted it to go really, but this is supposed to the first nice-ISH thing to happen between them, so i couldnt go too off the rails and be overdramatic again.

i ALMOST cut Lee’s little section in the middle, cause i kinda hate that we have all 3 perspectives this chapter, but i just couldnt find a way around either of those. oddly structured in my opinion but okay

the breakfast scene itself was written far before anything else in this chapter, and was in fact one of the earliest entries to drafting this fic in the first place! i stupidly lost the date to it, but i think most of the last section was largely written in february 2023

yeah remember what i said about 7-8000 word chapters recently? yeah this is what i was talking about at the time sdhfjk. had to make it this big because nothing in this chap could work as it own chapter, and would feel weird in others. huge chapter it is!

unfortunately, a lot of what i want to say about this chapter development wise is actually kinda spoilery 😬 theres some subtle and not-so-subtle things introduced in this chapter that will come up again later, but i have to keep my mouth shut!! i will say tho that a reconsideration on when to bring up a decently important plot point is one of the reasons this chapter took so long lol

[fictionfixations]

event

at one point i was planning on writing the twst events

but now im not too sure and it feels like it'd just follow the same storyline (even if dialogue parts might be different here and there)

(im probably better off writing the parts that are different, and summarizing the rest. god.)

(..ive written 8000 words of the halloween event. majority of it is literally the introduction of each dorm. and the farthest ive gotten is 1-19. i regret everything. AND i have to write more because i ended up making yuu an existing character, which i hadnt before bc i didnt know what to do with them. so i skipped the whole beginning part. *headbang*)

so anyway here are names.

--------

Twisted Takes: Spectral Part/ner (ghost bride. this is a little more important because it would've had a hint to who idia's.. okay well this is for a reincarnation series. so it would've had a hint to who idia's reincarnation was without directly spoiling it. ..i like the title i made for this. partner. part/ner. part 'her'.)

Twisted Takes: A Night to Remember (the halloween event. i just wanted to write kalim being scary and showing a bit of his not happy-go-lucky self and surprising everyone, honestly.)

miraculously, though, no one remembers this moment (or if they do they dont pay it any mind. lol. or maybe ill just take it as events running off in an alternate timeline somewhere anyway since they dont play a big part) (..also. i feel like i should say. he's both in the horse club [for self-explanatory reasons] and the pop music club. [also dazzled by lilia's screaming- sorry singing])

Twisted Takes: Endless Fantasy (endless halloween. i think i got so lost trying to understand what was going on in this event. probably wont write them. ...but they got possessed...)

Twisted Takes: Starry ~ Starry ~ Night ~ ☆ (Wish upon a star. (Vincent) Starry Night. the song. title pending. the event feels important but idk)

Starry, starry night Paint your palette blue and grey Look out on a summer's day With eyes that know the darkness in my soul

Twisted Takes: Phantasmagoric Affair Fairy Gala

i have nothing to put here (the one with leona, kalim, and jamil i think. ruggie too but he's not the one dancing. like cmon some jamikali dancing hehehe. remembering their reincarnations cause this is spring. .....and book seven takes place near-ish or during spring i cant remember. but ..)

ignore the events that are missing

(watching someone play glorious masquerade. the twistune with them dancing has won me over it looks so fun, agh..)

[catsandbats13]

Okay so it’s not quite finished yet, but I’ve written like 8000 words of it with three chapters, though only two are fully written.

Seeing as this is my first ever fanfic and I’m writing smut for the first time, I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing in the slightest 😅 I’m mostly just writing it for fun

However I do still want to publish it once it’s done, so I was hoping maybe I could get someone on here to beta read it for me? I just want some feedback on it and maybe some writing advice if you have any

You don’t have to be a writer to beta read it for me, you just gotta be a fan of Stan x reader lol

If anyone is interested in doing this for me please let me know! I would appreciate it so so much!

I couldn’t sleep last night so I stayed up until 5 am writing over 2000 words of a Stan x reader fanfic 😅

It’s like I was possessed by the spirit of a writer cause I legit couldn’t stop, normally it takes me way longer to write something I actually like

I’m hoping I can get enough of it done today that I can post it on here 👀

[derryqueenx]

Used as Bait sequel fic for the hurt bingo prompt ‘Gagged’? Don’t think I really need to give much more info on what we want from that HA :D :D PLEASE

Gagged.

Word Count: 3030

TW: Where to start? lol tied-up, gagged (duh), small violence (nothing crazy or graphic) unwanted pet names/physical touch, swearing.

(I’ve added the blue to indicate what’s already been submitted since I’ve been getting a few questions on it! Whatever isn’t marked off or underlined is still available for your submission!)

Send through your prompts and any NoelJulian related characters (if you have one in mind! If not I’ll just write whatever I feel works best for said prompt)! The Free Prompt square is if you want me to write a fic based on something that’s not already written! You can send them in and just say it’s for the ‘free prompt’ bingo. Let’s cause our favourite characters some hurt (with small comfort. I’m not a monster.)

After the events at the club, Lyle had brought Vince back to his house, which proved to be much easier for the other man given Vince had still been feeling the affects of whatever they’d drugged him with up until about an hour ago.

Vince’s lifeless and helpless body had been lugged around gracelessly; being thrown over the shoulder of one of the guys who had been holding him upright, then tossed and buckled into the backseat of Lyle’s car where he was forced to listen to the man rant on about his ‘future plans’ and horrible music taste, before once again being thrown over Lyle’s shoulder and dumped onto the couch like he was nothing more than a decorative pillow.

At the time, Lyle had simply stared down at Vince for a few minutes, all while the smaller man could do nothing to hide himself away from the unwanted gaze, or even flinch when the other man carefully brushed a few strands of his hair off his forehead in a way that could very easily be mistaken as comfort, but Vince felt anything but comforted.

He wanted to shout at him. Wanted to run. Wanted to call for Howard. But he couldn’t. And that fear mixed in with his current rage was all he held onto for the next few hours as he lay on this couch in the same position, front down and head tilted enough so he could purely stare ahead at the red rug before him, and he focused on that feeling.

Focused on just getting back to Howard.

So when he finally started to feel a small tingling sensation in his fingers, that feeling turned to hope.

Thankfully, Lyle left him alone eventually. Saying something about getting ready for the night and disappeared up the stairs where Vince heard the shower running. Now with Lyle distracted, Vince knew he had a chance.

He had no idea where he was, but Vince knew Naboo would be looking for him. If the smaller shaman wasn’t the one to suggest it, than Howard would certainly not even be letting the man get some beauty sleep until Vince was found. And Bollo wouldn’t have been too fond to find out Vince had been taken either.

Safe to say that Vince, ever the optimist, felt pretty confident in the theory that he wouldn’t be here for too long.

Taking the small window of distraction that he had, Vince slowly started gaining control of his limbs again, starting with the fingers and working their way down the body until eventually he was sitting upright on the couch, head spinning only a little as he tried to regain his composure before standing. Last thing he needed was to finally have some control again, only to immediately pass out from moving too quickly.

As he stood, Vince didn’t even bother to do a surroundings check and instantly moved as fast as his body would let him over to the back door. It was glass and allowed Vince to glance out onto the patio and oversee the large hectares of yard that Lyle had. Taking that into account on top of the huge mansion he’d been brought to, as well as the fact that Lyle had just, you know, spent nearly 8000 on Vince, It wasn’t hard to conclude that Lyle must have been very rich. “Well, you’re about to have wasted a lot of money on yours truly, mate.” Vince muttered to himself as he quickly got to work on the door handle. “I’m worth at least 10,000.” He continued, talking to himself as a distraction from the immense amount of nerves and adrenaline he was feeling right now.

He quickly discovered that the door was locked, but that wasn’t going to slow him down. He moved on to the nearest window, finding that to be locked also, until finally he was scattering around to every window and door he could get his hands on. Surely one of them would be open?!

“Uh, finally up, I see.” Lyle’s venomous voice startled him, causing Vince to jump and spin around to see the man standing in the middle of the living room, watching him.

“Get the fuck back, you creep.” Vince held his hand out in front of him, creating as much of a physical barrier as he could between them as Lyle took an ominous step closer, hands held up in a mock surrender.

“And what exactly do you plan to do if I don’t, hmm?” He teased, the corner of his lip twitching with a smirk.

Vince quickly glanced around the room, trying to find whatever was closest to him that he could use as a weapon of some sort. Finding nothing of use within his vicinity, he settled on just grabbing whatever he could reach. An apple. “Give you a killer black eye, for a start.” He threatened, really hoping that it sounded more threatening than it felt, but judging from the amused look Lyle gave him, he realized it probably didn’t.

Lyle chuckled at him. “Put that down before you make this worse for yourself.” It was said in the same amused tone and expression, although Vince could nearly taste the warning element behind it. But he didn’t falter.

“You can’t keep me here.” He spat out, taking a few small steps against the wall to try and keep the separation he had at the moment.

“Of course I can. I own you, now.” Lyle said matter-of-factly, to which Vince just scoffed.

“You don’t own me. No one owns Vince Noir!” He paused. “My friends will be here any second now..” He tried instead, believing that statement with his entire heart. “And it’s not going to end very well for you when they do get here. They can be a bit… protective.” He smirked proudly, hoping that that would scare some sense into the man before him.

“And how do you propose they find you?” He raised an eyebrow.

“One of them’s a Shaman, yeah. He’ll track me.”

Again, Lyle laughed at Vince like he had just told a comical joke. “It’s a little hard to track something that you can’t locate, isn’t it?” Vince just stared back at him in confusion, unable to register what he was suggesting. “Think about it. I bought you at a Shaman Auction. You don’t think that maybe I’ve got a Shaman of my own?”

A small sliver of doubt and panic started to bubble up in his chest even though he hadn’t pieced all the puzzle together yet. “I don’t-“ He started, but Lyle cut him off.

“Come on, I’m sure you’re a smart boy. You can figure it out.” Lyle baited, staring intently at Vince as the smaller mans hand holding the apple started to lower as he thought, possibilities running through his head as he glanced around the room trying to find the answer he was looking for.

Why wouldn’t Naboo be able to find him? A tracker potion would work just fine, wouldn’t it? What did he mean ‘not able to locate’, it shouldn’t be that hard to locate Vince. Naboo’s potions always worked. The only time Vince ever remembers them not working was… today. At the club. When Naboo couldn’t open the door because there was already a spell in place… “No…” He whispered out in disbelief.

Lyle clicked his tongue at him. “Barrier Protection Potion from my dear Shaman.” Lyle point up to the roof, drawing a circle in the air to indicate the circumference to which the barrier went. “This place is practically invisible to anyone looking for it that’s not invited. It also helps with keeping my pets indoors.” He grinned proudly at Vince at that, and Vince jumped to action.

He shot around to the window directly behind him, pulling on it wildly as he tried to break the lock or the glass or just do something. No way was he staying here longer than he already had! “No, no no no no..” He muttered to himself in frustration every time the window refused to budge. “NO!” He screamed, resorting to punching onto the thick glass pane, whether in irritation or trying to break the glass, Vince himself wasn’t sure. “Howard!” He cried out, the overwhelming flooding sensation of panic sinking back in.

He couldn’t stay here. No, this isn’t what was meant to happen. Not to Vince Noir. Nothing bad ever happened to him! He was meant to live with Howard and go on adventures together and make dumb decisions that they’d look back on one day and laugh at. Not stuck in some rich guys house as-.. as-.. as whatever he wanted!

He spun back around, realizing a bit too late that it was a bad idea to have his back to Lyle, and noticed the man had moved much closer in that brief moment. “Get away from me!” He screeched, pushing himself up against the wall in a failed attempt at creating distance once more.

“You don’t get to make the decision around here, pet.” Lyle purred, the never-leaving smirk still plastered on his face as he reached his hand up, and Vince wasn’t about to stand idly by to find out what his intent was.

“Don’t call me that!” Without giving it a second thought, Vince used the cap of his thick boots to kick into Lyle’s shin with as much force as he could. The man gasped out in pain, leaning forward to grip onto his stinging shin as Vince tried to make a run for it. A part of him still held hope that maybe Lyle was lying. Maybe he could still get out. He just had to find the right exit.

He didn’t get more than a step past Lyle when the man wrapped a strong arm around Vince’s torso, pushing him back against the wall with enough force to almost wind him as he grunted out in pain and shock. Lyle pressed himself up against Vince in a split second, pressing him between the wall and his own much larger body as a hand came up to wrap around Vince’s petite throat, not squeezing, but threatening, as he glared daggers into Vince’s panicked and wide eyes.

Vince wasn’t a fighter; Never had been, and he’d never been manhandled like this before. Maybe if he knew how to fight back, or wasn’t so frightened and alone right now, he could’ve gotten away. But as fate would have it, that wasn’t the case.

“You’re not off to a good start, pet.” Was all Lyle seethed out before he tightened his hand around Vince’s neck, squeezing enough to get a good grip before then pulling Vince’s head forward, and slamming it back against the wall in one swift motion, knocking the younger man out instantly.

…

When he came to again, it wasn’t one of those moments where his brain was fuzzy and he wasn’t able to remember what had happened. He woke up in a sudden jerk, all memories of his previous encounter with Lyle flooding back instantly as he eyes shot up in a panic.

He was in a different room now. He couldn’t tell what kind of room it was – it was bare. The walls were painted in different shades of beige and dark pink and brown, and the floor seemed like it was previously covered with carpet before it was ripped up to display to hard concrete underneath that was also covered in various stains and mismatching colors, and the windows were covered by stray bits of wood that appeared to be nailed over them to block out the sun. All in all, it looked like the start of a construction site.

Once Vince had taken in the room, the next thing his eyes landed on were Lyle, standing just in front of him in the open doorway, arms crossed over his chest as he looked at Vince with a disappointed expression. As soon as Vince spotted Lyle, he jerked, his body not liking the idea of another scrimmage and trying to get away, only to be quickly re-introduced to the fact he couldn’t move.

At first he thought maybe he’d been drugged again, but as he looked down he realized it was much worse than that.

He was tied to a chair.

His wrists and ankles secured tightly with rope to the arms and legs of the metal chair he was seated on. He gave them an experimental tug, testing to see just how tightly he was stuck here, and nothing budged. Not even a small bit of leeway to not cut off circulation – Lyle had really wanted him to stay put. To make matters worse, Vince realized he was no longer wearing the suit he and Howard had spent all afternoon picking out, but was now stuck in just his boxers and undershirt.

He was starting to feel a little exposed.

“I did say I liked them feisty, didn’t I?” Lyle started speaking, unfolding his arms to instead cross them behind his back as he started walking further into the room. “Reason being..” He continued, stopping just in front of where Vince was sat, his hand reaching forward to grip Vince’s chin and force the man to look up at him. “The feisty ones are the most fun to punish.”

The fact that the basement was already equipped with the chair he was currently tied to did not go over his head in the slightest, and the faint smell of copper in the air didn’t go unnoticed either. Vince was able to deduce that the mystery stains on the wall and floor were probably blood, and this was more than likely not Lyle’s first time having someone in Vince’s position. Logic should be telling Vince to play along with whatever he wanted and not give him any more reasons to get angry, but logic was never Vince’s forte.

Vince snarled at him, shaking his head away and out of Lyle’s grip as he glared up. That small part of him that had been scared earlier seemed to have been taken over by the adrenaline again, as all he felt welling up inside him was defiance. “My friends are going to find me.” He stated, certainty laced in his voice. “You can keep me here all day, it wont matter. They’ll come for me.”

Lyle tilted his head to the side as he studied Vince, that amusement once again creeping into his expression. “All day, you say?” He hummed out in consideration, reaching into his pants pocket as he fiddled around for something. “Well, that might just work out. I do have some guests coming over tomorrow, and I don’t want you causing a scene.” Vince watched in concerned curiosity as Lyle pulled out the tie that Vince had been wearing earlier from his pocket, along with what looked like a t-shirt rag.

“Wait- what do you mean?” The panic was coming back in rather quickly as he tried to lean back and away as much as he could, which obviously wasn’t a lot considering his current position.

“I mean, I don’t want my guests being distracted by the loud noises of my new pet. It’s been a rather big day for you. How about I leave you alone to think everything over, yeah?” Lyle started bunching the rag into a ball, and Vince’s brain quickly was able to fill in the blanks to the end of this scenario rather quickly.

“Woah, woah, woah- hang on, wai-“ He was cut off with a wince when Lyle grabbed a hold of the back of his head, tugging harshly onto his hair to keep his head still. Vince had nowhere to go, nothing to fight back with, and was about to be stripped of the last remaining thing he had left. In a moment of pure desperation and determination, he decided to at least put these last remaining seconds to good use as he glared up at Lyle through gritted teeth.

“Howard’s going to kill you.”

Lyle just grinned back at him. “I’d like to see him try.” And with that, Lyle shoved the dirty rag into Vince’s mouth, ensuring it was far enough in to be useful, and whilst keeping a hold onto Vince’s hair roughly, he secured Vince’s own tie over it between his teeth, keeping the rag in his mouth, and tying it together at the back.

Of course, Vince desperately tried to push the rag out, wiggling it around to loosen some of the tension, but if there was one thing Vince was able to figure out already about Lyle, it was that he was pretty good at knots. The rag was already uncomfortable in his mouth, and Vince could predict his jaw aching in only a few minutes, and just hoped that Lyle didn’t plan to leave him like this for too long.

As Lyle turned on his heels to walk out again, he made a casual comment over his shoulder. “I’ll check in on you again tomorrow night. That should be enough time for you ponder over your current situation.” And Vince’s eyes widened. Tomorrow night?!Vince wasn’t sure what time of day it was right now thanks to the windows being blocked off, but he knew tomorrow night didn’t sound nearby. It sounded a fair while away, actually. Surely he couldn’t stay here alone until then?

He cried out in dispute but all that was heard throughout the room was the muffled sounds thanks to the gag. He pulled at the restraints again, trying anything to get Lyle’s attention to confirm that he didn’t actually mean that, right? He wasn’t going to leave Vince here all day..

He couldn’t see Lyle’s face, but he was able to sense the smirk even from where he was sitting. “Welcome to your new life, Vince.” He commented, flicking off the light switch as he closed the door behind him with the click of the lock, leaving Vince alone in pure darkness, unable to move or talk. Just left alone with his thoughts, and the pure sense of dread that was washed over him.

-

I know i said it would be a few more days until the sequel, but i had a look at the prompts and if i waited until this one was sent in that meant i would've had like, 4 stories in a row of pure whump hahah So i'm gonna try and break them up instead! Hope you liked it anon!!

[twinkskeletons]

You know a lot about fob right. Did Pete really write infinity on high about Mikey Way (I would look it up myself but I don't like mcr boys sorry)

oh man. well. i neither know nor care much about this tbh and also don’t particularly feel like reading an 8000 word manifesto lol . of all the mcr guys i probably have the most built up resentment towards mikey as before i had to learn every single fashion choice gerard makes it was endless sunsets and waterparks and “every fob song after 2005 was written about this one twink”. from what i do know most of ioh is pretty clearly about fame and the media and their relationship with fans etc etc. the only petekey connection im really aware of is that some lines from bang the doldrums are taken from one of petes livejournal posts that many assume is about mikey. i think thats kind of it but i really could not care less abt this guy so havent read like. the full string cork board u know

[hereliesbb]

I am struggling so much with writing.

I have 8000 freaking words written to this third part of my prompt a thon fic from last year (Falling into Place/trusting the process) I really like the story but BETH.

My characterization of her is just so off. Up until this point I haven’t cared too much - just wrote her how I wanted but since this season started I’m just like not able to move forward until I get this right. and even then if I do somehow manage to feel confident of how she’s portrayed, what about the other two parts of the story where she’s already open and OOC? does this make sense?

Sorry to anyone who is still waiting.

I think it’s time to suck it up and use a beta reader. lol. I don’t know why that terrifies me so much when it didn’t use to. I’m weird. help.

[anakinthetrashking]

BnHA One-Shot Fic Recs (pt2)

 I AM HERE! With more recs for you! The last post was all about DadMight, such a beautiful genre *wipes tear from eye* This time its DADZAWA! if you happen to follow me, you might know that i really really(really) love Aizawa. a lot. So im going to try to keep this to only 10 recs, but,, well,,,, we’ll see anyway leTS GO

Aches and Pains by Badwolf36 Rating: G     Category: Gen     ~2700 words Summary: In which Izuku isn't willing to admit how much pain he's in, and Mr. Aizawa is just as much of a softie for his students as he always is. I’m always SO WEAK to stories that deal with the very real consequences of breaking all of your bones. Poor Izuku. I enjoyed the details of how he’s feeling, the way that the reader’s awareness of his pain waxes and wanes along with Izuku’s (temporary distractions can only do so much, A+ for realism there). Also, soft Dadzawa while not mushy-ooc-Aizawa! Conclusion: I love this and also want Aizawa to make me hot cocoa when there’s storms and i cant sleep!! (sidenote, everytime i see this username my brain shorts out bc my old ff.net account was also Badwolf## lol)

My Neighbor Shouta-ro by Hound_of_Heaven Rating: G     Category: Gen     ~2,700 words Summary: Yamada Hizashi, on Christmas Eve of the year he turns 19, jokingly presents Aizawa Shouta, also 19, with a Totoro kigurumi. Everything that follows after is pure chance. Heeeeeeeeeck this is ADORABLE. I- You guys- this is so pure and so precious and so!! go read it, i died. such fluff.

constrained by my own mind (im not fine) by CamsthiSky (tumblr: @camsthisky ) Rating: G     Category: Gen     ~1,500 words Summary: Midoriya Izuku is a problem child, and for some reason, Aizawa Shouta cares too much to let him fend for himself when the kid is obviously dealing with something First of all this is written by one of my fav Batfam writers!!! I was so hype when i saw this posted and OF COURSE IT WAS JUST AS WONDERFUL IF NOT MORE SO THAN I EXPECTED!!!! A+++++ in character for both Izuku and Aizawa. Izuku is jumpy and anxious and stressed and i love it. That the way Izuku started out, and while i am eternally happy at how much his life and social reactions have already changed, stuff like that doesnt just disappear in even a year, so I love fics that address that and expound on all the progress that he would have to make behind the scenes. and having Aizawa as the catalyst to begin getting actual help? *chef’s kiss* This checks boxes and then proceeds to cover the page in checkmarks LOL

remember from here on in by aloneintherain (tumblr: @captainkirkk ) Rating: T     Category: Gen     ~8000 words warning: spoiler heavy from manga chp 215 Summary: Aizawa glances from All Might to Midoriya quickly. It sounds impossible—he’s never heard of a quirk that can be handed down like a family heirloom—but at the same time, it makes perfect sense. Midoriya’s inability to use his quirk at the start of the year. The strange, familial relationship between All Might and Midoriya. The slow malnourishment of All Might’s body, like his power was being siphoned away. “You’re …” Aizawa begins.“I’m All Might’s successor.” Midoriya’s proud but shaky voice rings clearly down the empty corridor. Aizawa finds out about One for All. Awwwwwwww yiiiiiiiissssssssss!!!!! reveal fic!!!! one of my all time fav tropes!!! Plus it expounds on some future theorys/possibilities(Spoilers!!!) and you get some great interactions between Izuku and Shinsou, and plenty of opportunities taken to wear out our already worn out catepillar-sensei. poor guy needs a break but would do anything for these kids. Incredible characterization, great feels!!

Those Hardest to Love Need it Most by DancingintheStorm Rating: T     Category: Gen     ~8,200 words Summary: Shouta gripped the phone tight enough to make the phone case groan. “So it’s true. Midoriya was Quirkless.”“Until soon before the entrance exam,” Nedzu confirmed. “That’s not relevant now, though, because—““Relevant?” Shouta hissed. “Midoriya is barely functional, socially. He doesn’t trust any adult. He thinks the whole world hates him. He apologizes for everything except breaking the law, and I’m sure I can trace every single one of those things back to his Quirklessness. You call that irrelevant?”  Aizawa visits Aldera Junior High and finds out some disturbing truths. Yes. Just. Yes. Righteous anger abounds, local anxiety-child is told for the first time that his life has worth, more at 10 (I LOVE THIS ONEEE)

The Gaunlet and friendships and how memes tie the two together by averypassionateperson Rating: T     Category: Gen     ~3,500 words Summary: Shinsou walks into his first day in the Hero Course hoping to get politely ignored. He walks out having gotten into a sanctioned fistfight with the entire Bakusquad and a whole lot of new friendships. Also, memes are responsible for most of this. This fic is SOOOOOOOOO much fun. Always sure to bring a smile and honestly all I could want from a fic about Shinsou’s first day in 1A!!!

like light through a window by achievingelysium   (tumblr: @queenangst ) Rating: T     Category: Gen     1,139 words Summary: The first time Shouta sees what Hagakure looks like, it’s because she’s covered in blood. Coming from one of the best Dadzawa writers around, is a delightfully haunting fic centered on Hagakure!! The Dazawa is of course, spot on, the premise makes your heart ache as it plays out like a movie in your mind. So smooth to read, while so emotionally painful. Ouch. It is a fic with imagery that has stuck in my mind like a plant with deep roots, bc i keep thinking about it despite my too-much-fanfic-reading-adhd-muddled-brain. I feel like i had more to say but tumglr erased the paragraph i had originally written. D:   (side note, as i am keeping these posts to 10 fics... this fic came from her series of 30 min fics which you can find here on tumblr ao3  its an absolute goldmine of one-shots, go check it out)

a frozen pond, dark and deep by walking_through_autumn Rating: T     Category: Gen     ~3,800 words Summary: In the aftermath of Endeavour's battle against High End, Aizawa escorts Todoroki to his home for special leave, and they have a conversation that has been long in the making. (Or: Over two car rides and the mystery known as bubble tea, Aizawa divulges information, Todoroki returns the favour, and trust is built over unexpected similarities.) This fic felt just as quiet as the two characters it surrounds, which was really nice. Even deep emotional grieving can be quiet, since everyone feels things and reacts to things differently. It was a brilliant way to chip away at these character’s walls to let light shine through without creating an earthquake event to destroy the walls completely, you know? and it works off of canon so well. ah yes seeing the process of Aizawa realizing that hes has adopted another child is my fav    anyhow i enjoyed it very much!

but still my heart is heavy (with the hate of some other man’s beliefs) by honeyandsunshine Rating: T     Category: Gen     ~3,500 words Summary: Nemuri jerks a thumb to the side window, presumably the one with the best view of the front gates. When Shouta looks, a small crowd, all of which he can recognize from his class, are gathered around a sleazy looking man with a camera and a microphone. Half their quirks are activated. Bakugou and Todoroki are smoking. From the bushes nearby, a rather enraged stag emerges. As he gets up, Shouta just hopes they haven’t already killed him. Or:Class 1-A defends their own. Aizawa suffers, but looks after them anyways. I love how this doesn’t go the way you expect it to. and how much Aizawa loves and trusts his class full of gremlin heroes. The Dadzawa is so soft, his logic is sound, my heart aches, and i kinda want to cry. really, really, really great you guys

bend, don’t break by heyhamlet (tumblr: @hey-hamlet ) Rating: T     Category: Gen     ~4,100 words Summary: It started, as it always seemed to, on what was supposed to be a pleasant day. ---A Christmas shopping attempt gone wrong, Aizawa and Midoriya have to survive a strange nightmare quirk, all while trying to work out how to get out of there alive. Aizawa is injured, Midoriya is panicked. It's less a question of what could go wrong, but more what could go right. Another fic that has not left my soul since i read it. Some of it is truly terrifying in a way that I hope never haunts my own nightmares. and honestly isnt that reason enough to read it? While near death experiences bond people together well, nothing beats being trapped with someone in a nightmare that is feeding off of your deepest fears! If Aizawa wasn’t considering adoption before, he certainly is now. Found family before the monster finds you...0.o go read it, its a treat from another top notch writer!

well, thats 10! the next post will probably be misc. bnha one-shots. Enjoy and don’t forget to give the writers your souls love and comments!

[brooklyn-etc]

Project Cedar - Update #1

hey friends! since camp nano begins tomorrow I figured now would be a good time to introduce my new wip! it still doesn’t have a title, so for now we’ll call it Project Cedar after the town it takes place in, Cedar Creek. this novel kind of just sprang up on me out of nowhere. within the first week of getting the idea, I had written 8000 words that were actually… good words?? I was very surprised at how quickly I came to understand the setting and the character dynamics. however, since I’m not outlining this book, I’m starting to slow down in the drafting process to make sure I establish a clear direction, clear goals, etc. so that the book doesn’t go off in random directions. I’m still learning a lot about this book, but I figured I’d share some of what I do know!

What’s happened so far:

after Elle’s father is involved in an embezzlement scandal back home and her parents’ reputations are trashed, they move to a distant relative’s cottage in a very small town called Cedar Creek in rural Georgia for the three-month span of summer. with her parents’ relationship growing more and more strained, Elle tries to stay out of the house as much as possible. while exploring the woods around the cottage, she sees Vivian canoeing across a lake with a backpack full of supplies—food, flashlights, etc. this piques her interest, so the next day when she sees Vivian leaving from the cemetery behind the old church down the road, she follows her. & that’s where we’re at! it doesn’t sound like much, but it’s 8500 words so I promise more stuff has happened lol. anyway, to the fun stuff!

Characters:

our two MCs!

Elle is our first-person narrator, and the story is told retrospectively. she is very introverted, observant, a bit cynical, naturalistic, very Impressionable. she is fifteen when the story begins but turns sixteen during the course of the book.

Vivian is vibrant, confident, a bit mysterious, has unpredictable moods, leader type, avoids talking about herself so she talks about other people a lot. she is seventeen and lives with her older brother, Wren (eighteen) and his three Quite Large dogs. 

Excerpts:

We followed a single winding road through miles of woods, and I could count the number of buildings along the way on one hand. My father drove with one hand on the steering wheel and the other picking at a loose thread in his jeans. I could tell he was growing more nervous with time. He occasionally glanced at my mother who’d remained silent for most of the ten-hour ride, at first with her nose in a book, but now just resting her head on the window, her blonde hair hiding the side of her face like a curtain. In the reflection, I could see her eyebrows pinched together either in curiosity or contempt. It was as though she was trying to see something beyond the expanse of scrawny trees and pine needles surrounding us, something far past the horizon.

The water lapped against the shore lazily, and pebbles lolled back and forth like babies being rocked to sleep. The girl became still as if she were waiting for something, listening. She placed the paddle across her lap, let the canoe bob gently in place. She turned to look at me. She didn’t seem surprised to see me standing there in the trees. It was like she knew I was there all along. My voice caught in my throat. She was bare-faced and freckled, and probably a couple years older than me. She grinned, the whites of her teeth flashing in the dark, before she began to paddle again. A faded red life jacket trailed in the water behind her.

Oop—here’s an excerpt from a flashback of Elle’s old friend Grace, who may or may not make an appearance in Cedar Creek later on in the book.

It was late November, still warm enough to wear shorts but not warm enough to drown in your own sweat. We flanked the road that stretched from behind the school, a barb-wired fence cutting between us and a pasture. There were some cows laying in the shade under a tree, two brown, one black, their ears twitching away flies, tails slapping the earth. They watched us a moment as we passed, heads following us in lazy unison. Soon they returned to gnawing on tufts of dried-up grass with their gazes focused on nothing in particular. A cattle egret landed on a wooden post ahead of us. Grace swatted it away.

that’s all I have for now! I’m not sure how seriously I’ll be taking camp nano, because I’d rather do what’s best for the book rather than try to get as many words as possible, but we’ll see!

Brooklyn

[kiwiana-writes]

for the fic writer meme: 6, 9 & 10 for kinkverse please and thank you 💖

Thank you so much for this! I love that this question encompasses like a quarter of my total wordcount, and I’m going to pretend that’s why my response got so long and not just because I’m incapable of shutting up 😂  Putting the answers under the cut because... kink.

[10 Questions Every Fic Writer Secretly Wants to be Asked] || [ASKS OPEN FOR THESE]

6. Which scenes did you cut, and which were added in kink!verse?

Technically, every single story after the first one is an added scene considering it was supposed to be a one-shot 😂 But in terms of specifics, I don’t really have an outline for any of these other than a like, kink or theme for each episode, but some stuff that changed while writing include:

-The service top/let’s explore what gets you off conversation originally happened in person and it just. wouldn’t. work. Honestly I can’t even remember HOW I had the idea now to switch it to phone sex but once I did I wrote the whole thing in, like, four hours.

-The very quiet sex fic was on the outline as a different kink -- it did start with the silence thing, it just then segued -- but I just couldn’t make it land in a way that I was comfortable with, so I ended up scrapping a huge chunk of the fic and just expounding on the whole “stay quiet” thing. It’s still probably my least favourite of the ‘verse for that reason 😂

-The attempted con-non-con was originally going to be a lot... not darker, exactly, but a much tougher read, with David actually asking to be tied up and Patrick having a full-scale panic attack. But, look. The world sucks right now, and fanfic is ultimately my happy place, and trying to write it was just not good for me mentally. So again, cut a bunch of stuff out and rejigged it.

9. Which idea came to you first in kink!verse?

-So the very first part was a prompt: You know what I want? I want sub David going to a club in Toronto to get his fix of being being whipped and told he’s a good boy, and finding brand new babydom Patrick, who has never done this before but DAMN does he want to put David on his knees. Which I, uh, may have some real life experience with 😅so I was like “yeah sure I’ll write that why not.” But the first thing that made me go “oh, okay, this is going to turn into a series isn’t it” was thinking about stay here and think about what you’ve done because... come on. 🔥 

10. What are some facts readers may not know about kink!verse?

-Readers who found it after it was already a ‘verse might not realise that the first part was absolutely intended to be a standalone! (And in fact, if you read some of the earliest comments, my responses to people asking for more are oh, maybe... fucking el oh el.) I think it took me, like, 12 hours to say fuck this is going to be a series isn’t it, and five days before I realised I was going to end up writing a fic for every episode. (At the time I said a fic for every episode, maybe an exception for 4.08 because I’m allergic to angst, unless I can figure out how to sexily write, like, sad self-flagellating masturbation or something and, uh, that’s basically what I did end up writing for 4.08 sooooo.

-I know I’ve talked about this before but I am functionally incapable of writing in order. Before I published part two of kink!verse I’d written snippets from 6.02 and 6.08 and what eventually became 4.12, and I TRY to mostly write in order now (at least in terms of writing the next episode; within that, scenes are still all over the place lol) but I’m one of those people who HAS to get something on paper when I’m thinking about it or it floats out of my brain forever.

-My intention was to stay in David POV for the whole series but 5.01 and PARTICULARLY 5.02 were... not going to work from David’s perspective without it getting real uncomfortable real fast. So I switched it up, and it’s probably going to bounce around a bit from here on out because like I said, some future episodes already have chunks written.

-I wrote 500-ish words of part one from Patrick’s POV for a Tumblr meme a while back.

-There’s a reason I keep hammering home not taking kink advice from fic, there’s a reason I was not willing to tolerate any comments about how if Patrick had been pegged he’d have realised he was gay earlier on the fic that mentioned that he’d tried pegging before, there’s a reason I’m as careful as I can be about making sure everything that happens in my fics would be acceptable in real life (while also trying not to write 8000 words of really boring discussion every time): I actually worked in a BDSM-focused sex store for a year, and part of my job was literally to educate people who were new to BDSM on stuff like safewords and aftercare and safe/sane/consensual vs risk-aware consensual kink and all sorts of practical things like that. Turns out even years out of that job it is really really hard to switch my brain off when it comes writing that stuff.

-I am definitely keen to write a Patrick/Rachel prequel in this ‘verse but probably not until after the canon series is complete. And I know views are a lot lower on anything not David/Patrick hello Elevate fics but sometimes the heart wants what it wants 🤣 

[pseudowoodo]

M, T, and U for the fic asks?

thanks! this got really long so i put the second two under the read more. questions are from here

M: Got any premises on the back burner that you’d care to share?

lol so many. here’s my list of wips

dair

a prequel/dan pov to my ues dan/brooklyn blair fic

libeled lady au

gentlemen prefer blondes au

sabrina au

the 100 au (s1 only lol)

seblaine

got a few chapters left of my s3 mckinley au and then i’ll probably do more little s4 one shots. i’ve got part of a glease one written

i have like 8000 words of a roman holiday au?? i think it was for one of the seblaine week promps last year but i didn’t finish in time. it needs a lot of work and i haven’t decided whether to stay true to the movie ending or not

a fuller version of post-series seblaine at nyu together

other

i know i’ve already written a room with a view au for dair but i also have one for jess/rory lol. it’s a modern au though, set between s4 and 5 when rory goes to europe with emily. the big difference from canon is that luke moved to nyc to help take care of jess when his dad skipped out so neither of them know the gilmores when they run into rory in italy

a zutara fic where aang doesn’t reappear to defeat the firelord so zuko and katara, who beat azula as planned, are now stuck in the middle of the fire nation cut off from the rest of the resistance. high stress fake dating ensues.

i’d forgotten about half of these so let me know which sound interesting! i can do the wip meme thing of posting an excerpt

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

not really? the only thing that’s an automatic no for me is first person fic. i’m also generally not a fan of arranged marriage/imprinting/soulmate au stuff, all those tropes that skip over the getting together part and make it mandatory. that said, i have liked fics with each of those so it’s not a dealbreaker.

U: Share three of your favorite fic writers and why you like them so much.

i mean, margottenenbaum’s gossip girl fics are like half the reason i still devote any thought to gossip girl. they’re so incisive and perfectly capture who these characters are, or who they could have been, and there’s always at least one line that just knocks you out. shout out to according to keats and fitzgerald, the fic that made me love serena, and without a key, the fic that made me love nate and was one of the things that inspired my own s1 role swap au.

similarly, i think xsaturated’s glee fics are most of the reason i’m into seblaine at all. i originally quit glee after s2 and wasn’t part of the fandom so these fics were what made me fall in love with blaine and sebastian, both the characters and the ship. shout out to a caution to the birds, the first glee fic i ever read and still my favorite, and this blaine/jesse friendship fic, which is a delight.

another favorite is chash, who is so unbelievably prolific i still can’t wrap my mind around it. there was a several year period where there would be at least one new chash bellarke fic a week and they would always brighten my day. they’ve got a hallmark movie like comfort to them and honestly, the further divorced they are from the show the better.

[bow-woahh]

Spop Fic recs (Catradora)

(finally)

Hello Catradora trash can's today I finally give you what I've been promising for MONTHS - a fanfic rec list. Because, if you didn't already know, I read A LOT of Catradora fanfic, probably too much and although I'm definitely not the best judge of...anything, I really wanted to make this post, so here it is, weeks late.

(it's a long one though)

I’ve written my full opinions n shit on like the first 10 multi chapters and one shots because there’s a lot lol, and some I remember better than others (tbf I've re read all of them at this point), but yeahhh. For the others, I’ll describe it in less detail and a bit more jokily lol.

I'm sorry I haven't just linked all the fics bit I just want this to be out of my drafts loll, and I can assure you most of these are pretty easy to find, I apologise for the laziness though haha

Also I’ve tried to find the all the authors tumblr or other social media, but I couldn’t for all of them which sucks, so if you happen to be the author and I left you out, please comment :)

Anyway, Y'ALL NEED TO GET ON MY LEVEL SOOO WITHOUT FURTHER ADO HERE YOU GO:

(here's a key first)

Key:

(o) = ongoing

(f) = finished

[G]=General

[T] =Teen and up Audiences

[M]=Mature

[E]=Explicit

Multi-chapters:

1. Upper West Side by ceruleanstorm (o) 100,000+ words

@princessofgayskull

[Modern AU] [T]

This fic is so amazing!! It goes so deep into their psychology and past and damn is it hilarious at time. Also, I love the premise of it - Catra is a Uber driver and Adora ends up as her passenger. It's a fairly slowburn as it goes deep into the two girls' lives and really gives time for the relationship to develop naturally and that is honestly really appreciated because it makes the good moments between the two even better and more rewarding if I'm honest. A lot of angst though. All the other characters we know and love are also written amazingly in it too, and are made equally important. All in all, I love this fic and everything about it!

As of writing it has fairly infrequent updates, but each chapter is 10-20k+ words and has 9/12 chapters so...there’s a lot.

2. For my Sake by doublepasse (f) 100,000+ words

@doublepasse-writes

[Canon Compliant][E]

The story and world building is just - WOAH. This one is quite the slowburn but boy is it worth it. It's set a couple months to a year after season one, where Catra finally captures Adora but the tables turn very quickly when capturing her nearly results in her death, which Catra (unsurprisingly) didn’t want. The story has some BIG plot twists and is definitely one of the best canon universe Catradora fics I’ve ever read and the ending was very satisfying, but also open ended, BECAUSE there’s a part 2 coming and I couldn’t be more excited!

(Also, there is one chapter with nsfw content in it, but it has a sfw version)

3. Skinny Love by Maychup (o) 89,000+ words

@maychup

[Canon Compliant][M]

Another amazing fic that takes place in the canon universe that has such great world building, and is very plot heavy. It takes place days after the S1 finale and goes from there basically. The premise of it is similar to many fics and one shots you’ve probably read - sleeping with the enemy. From the first chapter it seemed like it could have easily been a five chapter easy redemption fic but nooooooo, it goes a lot LOT deeper. I feel like this fic did such a great job on character development, Catra’s specifically, she grows so much throughout the fic. She is also such a mother to all her Horde pals in this and I love that haha.

At the time of writing, it’s still ongoing, and boy am I excited to see where it goes. It’s also super angsty and has a fair-ish amount of smut so be warned!

4. The Heiress and The thief by Fuhadeza (f) 58,000+ words

@fuhadeza

[Regency AU][M]

As it says in the fic summary, it is literally the She-Ra regency AU I never knew I wanted likeeee, it’s so good! Premise - Adora is taken by Lady Brightmoon, leaving her boarding school, and her best friend behind, Catra, and everything is fine until her old friend face resurfaces. This one had me screaming at times (most of them did, but this especially). It was a really enjoyable read and I honestly loved the way the author dealt with love and the way Adora dealt with her feelings and just ahhh- read it.

5. Faded with feelings by yesimgay (f) 24,000+ words

[Roomates AU][T]

This fic. I read this a WHILEEE ago but to this day this is one of my favourite fan-fics ever like it’s hilarious, and fluffy and unproblematic and sometimes you need that tbh. Everything you need to know is established in the first chapter but the way it is done feels so natural, as if it’s just Adora‘s or Catra’s thoughts and I love it. Also the premise is GREAT - Catra has ADHD and smokes weed to help with it, and Adora accidentally takes an edible, which is when shenanigans start to ensue.

6. Dream of Me by DBsean (f) 18,000+ words

[Canon Universe][T]

Although it is on the shorter side with only five chapters, this was another fic that was so so good in quality and premise. For whatever reason, Catra and Adora start sharing dreams, enabling them to share moments together that they (unfortunately) can't have in real life, due to them being on opposite sides of the war, and in turn - enemies. The angst in this fic literally KILLED ME, and the characters dialogue is so good as well! I also recommend you check out some of the authors other fics, they're all great!

7. we've been making shades of purple out of red and blue by darklady21(o) 19,000+ words

[Roomates AU][M]

Another Roomates AU, bUT instead of being best friends, the two barely know each other, or interact at all...GREAT RIGHT?!? Honestly though, I think the author did a great job in making it not seem too rushed, especially in the setup and establishing how although they know each other, they DONT know each other, so the first couple chapters are basically that stage where they are learning more about each other and leaving stupid post it notes around the house, and it just feels so natural and great! Updates aren’t super regular, but there’s already nine chapters (as of writing) so definitely check it out, as well as their other works too!

8. Razorback by Starr_Reborn(o) 22,000+ words

[Canon Divergence AU][M]

Apparently, the author wrote this with the intent of it being fluffy. From the title you can tell that is NOT the case. At all. This one HURTS. This is very very angsty, and also has some themes of rape in it, so if that kinda thing triggers you I might wanna skip out on this one. It is a really good fic though and stands out from a lot of the others because of the way it is written. Chapters aren’t usually longer that 1000 words and the writing style is quite disjointed at times, and it a lot of the time a stream of consciousness. At times it can even be a little confusing or hard to follow, but I find it makes it even more interesting, and also means it will probably be a fic I come back to once completed. It is genuinely so unpredictable, I have no clue where it’s going, but I really love it for that!

9. Sunflower by TechnoSkittles (f) 6000+ words

@technoskittles

[High School AU][G]

Oh, BOY. Oh boyyy. This fic - it's 8 chapters and only 6000 words yet the story is just- Ahhh READ IT. It's so good! And like the author in general is so amazing at writing like check out all their works (especially their latest one shot omg I loved it). Anyway, read this, it's not too long, it's cute and also genuinely surprising, the ending was not something I saw coming AT ALL, so YEAH!

10. I like me better when I'm with you by lesbians_harold(f) 22,000+ words

@lesbians-harold

[High School AU][T]

Just a nice, fun, fluffy high school, friends to lovers AU. Catra moves to Adora’s school senior year and the twos friendship is quickly rekindled, after a rocky start albeit. Adora is a big ol’ jock and Catra draws which is a headcanon I LOVE. It’s written so well, and the characters are also written well too! It is a lil angsty at times, but not to worry - but it does pay off, I assure you.

11. I thought we were best friends by vanilla107 (o) 45,000+ words

@vanilla107

[University AU][T]

Breakups. Lots of breakups, and angst. This one will mend your heart then hurt you. BE SCARED. But go read it. I mean it. It's good!

12. Dirty Dancing by LilLegalLoli94 (o) 9000+ words

@lillegalloli94

[Dancing AU][M]

Basically lots of (sexual) tension after years of not seeing each other because Adora moved to Brightmoon Dance Academy. It's good. Real good.

13. Back to Black by eveynull (f) 6000+ words

[Canon Universe][T]

(Post War) Gays go and visit their past, staring angst, and featuring your favourite co-star - fluff!

14. how things are supposed to be by maggiesbombshell (o) 11,000+ words

@yeunslegacy

[High School AU][M]

A jolly slowburn that will hurt your soul because (internalised) homophobia and gay.

15. Some things you don't see coming by Trashibesensei (o) 20,000+ words

[High School AU][T]

Adora being a big ol' jock, and Catra being a big ol' gay. I’m not even gonna explain it, you have to find that out yourself.

16. A quarter after three by Maychup (o) 11,000+ words

@maychup

[Youtuber AU][M]

Adora's gay panic settles in when she bumps into her childhood bestie, Catra, live streaming in the streets of LA. My favourite part of this fic has to be the YouTube comments she gets. This one will make you laugh. And go AWWW CUTE.

17. A Song to My Heart by DemiRebel (f) 8000+ words

[Neighbors AU][G]

The cute girl next door keeps singing loud, and it sounds BELLE, so what else would you do other than creepily listen?? 10/10 for premise.

18. Occupied by Nny11 4000+ words

@nny11writes

[Modern AU][T]

The most hilarious soulmate AU I've read tbh. One word - bathrooms.

19. Whispering Dreams by dragonesdepapel (f) 7400+ words

[Canon Universe][T]

Adora finds a wounded and sick gay so obviously, she helps her out, much to her protesting. This fic will honestly make you go through the five stages of grief. Big ol' oof.

20. Why you SHOULD bring in your untrained cat to the rebellion by locuas (f) 6800+ words

[Canon Divergence AU][G]

This fic is a literal joke. But it will probably be the best crack you will ever read, so. READ IT.

ALSO HERES A LIL SELF PWOMO OF MY MULTI CHAP:

What drove her insane, 13,000+ words (f)

One shots:

1. hang tight (all you) by TechnoSkittles 9000+ words

@technoskittles

[High School AU][T]

This is a fic that will break your heart and mend it. It's about Adora coming to terms with her sexuality throughout high school in a pretty unsupportive environment, added onto the fact she has a crush on her best friend. It's paced so well, nothing feels rushed and although it's only 9000 words, it manages to flesh out characters that aren't even in the show, and it obviously does a great job with the topic at hand - sexuality and homophobia. Like it honestly touched my heart, reading it I genuinely wanted to cry. I loved everything about it, from the moment it started to the last line. It's just written in a way that is probably relatable to so many people who are or have struggled with coming to terms with themselves, and shows how for some it's really not an easy thing. It's also written beautifully, and I PROMISE you won't regret reading this! Definitely check out some more of their works too, they're all great reads!

2. you're my favorite song (and it's stuck in my head) by artemiswords 16,000+ words

@artemisbye 

[High School AU][T]

A belle valentine's day fan fic which I just,, ahhhhh this is some of the best 16k words I've ever read, it's so nice and fluffy! Premise - Catra has to take the bus to school, and ends up sitting next to this cute girl on the bus, Adora, and listening to TayTay (Swift), sharing earphones with this complete stranger. Obviously, Catra develops a crush, but she is sure Adora is straight. It's written so well, and is such an enjoyable read, with so many great moments and dialogue. Music is a very prevalent theme (which you can tell from the name tbh) in it, and the amount of song references in it also make it feel so fleshed out in a way, like their both just teenagers with somewhat questionable music taste. Just all the exchanges they have are great, especially the ones over text and social media, there were so many funny moments too. DEFO, recommend if you wanna read something nice and lighthearted!

3. The Interlude That Never Ends by FMLClexa 2000+ words

Twitter: catrxs

[Historical AU] [M]

Angst. Quite angsty. But also fairly fluffy, it has a good balance. And the writing style is just so - it gets your heart wrenching despite being fairly short, and is also very poetic, and I don't know about you, but I love things like that! The fic is a historical/soulmates AU where they are bound to fall in love, no matter the period they're reincarnated in. It's one of the most creative fic ideas I've ever read, and the concept is executed so well, which makes it even better. And it's, so so damn sweet ahh, read it read it READ IT!

4.  is there a knife in your bed or are you just happy to see me? by ceruleanstorm 6000+ words

@princessofgayskull

[Canon Universe][T]

This fic was everythinggg, it is so cute, like it’s basically 6k words of fluff! Also, if you didn’t already notice, the title (and the fic) heavily references the fact Adora keeps a knife under her bed (I DIED when that happened in s2).  Set post war, Catra sneaks away from her post to visit an overworked and stressed Adora in Bright Moon and cuteness ensues. I honestly just love everything about this fic, we need more fluffy and funny fics like this! The dynamic the two have in this is perfect and the dialogue and general writing style of it is great! And Adora’s internal dialogue in this honest to god had me dead. Needless to say this is one of my fav Canon Universe one shots.

5.Girl’s Become Lovers (Who Turn Into Mothers) by A_Zap 2000+ words

@azapofinspiration

[Canon Universe][G]

This has to be one of the cutest, well written, fic I’ve read! Catra brings home the only survivors from a tragedy her and Scorpia stumbled upon, but one thing Adora doesn’t expect is for them to be children. The,, emotions in this are so raw and powerful. Even though they obviously have these new little people in their life though, their problems don’t just go away, they still have their own issues, and have to deal with them while looking after these kids. In general they handle mental health so well, and Shadow Weavers lasting effect on Catra SHOWS and it shows hard. Honestly, it made me want to cry at some parts and the ending was EVERYTHING, so reAd IT.

6. baby, i'm a house on fire (and i wanna keep burning) by wittchers 7000+

@huremsultan

[Medival AU]

A really fun fic to read, with a very original premise: after the Horde defeats the kingdom Bright Moon, Hordak is crowned, Queen Angella was killed, and Princess Glimmer is missing, which leaves Lady Adora forced into an arranged marriage with Lord Catra, to keep her people happy. Obviously, being an arranged marriage, with her enemy, she ain’t too happy about it, nor is Catra. But they have to put up with it, and each other. Honestly, like the development of their relationships is sooo good, and there is the perfect balance e of angst and fluff (if you can call it that?) so don’t worry it won’t kill you! Like ahh, the emotions in this - so well described with so little words. And the ending is great, in general it’s great!

7. Adora Casts: Zone of Truth by Hemogobbler 2000+ words

@hemogobbler69

[Canon Universe][T]

Literally just 2000 words of utter cuteness and hilarious dialogue haha. Premise - Catra has just defected recently, and is still warming up to Adora, is still slightly shut off from her. So, to try remedy this, she gets a truth serum from Madame Razz, and slips it into their food, leading to them talking honestly about their feelings for the first time in a while. I just love it so much because I feel like this is genuinely something Adora would do, and also something I’d probably do in her situation - Catra opening up is a rare occurrence! Also, as I said, their are some really funny, laugh out loud moments, which out of context are so weird, yet somehow manage to make a lot of sense. Anyway, if you just had a bad day, I think this fic would definitely lift your spirits.

8. bloom by kimah 4000+ words

Twitter: whitehotmoons

[Modern AU][G]

A post break up fan fic where Catra's therapist suggests Catra write down her feelings, which leads her to write the things she hates about Adora, and their interactions they've had since their break up. The way it's written is so... angsty but like, not? I'm bad at this. Literally, reading this I really felt Catra's pain, and I just wanted to give her a hug at times. Adora too. The small details the author outs into the characters makes the characters all that more realisitic too, and I love it! Seriously though, the angst, will, get, you.

9. I do adore by thankskelley 6000+ words

Twitter: cosmicsporks

[Modern AU][G]

A Catradora fake dating AU. Is there anything more you need in life? Catra and Adora are are roomates, and one day, Adora bursts in, saying she finally came out to her parents, and also that her parent had assumed they are dating... leading her to ask if Catra could pretend to be her girlfriend for while. What could possibly go wrong? Hmm?? I've always loved the whole fake dating premise (to all the boyss) and with characters like Adora and Catra, (especially Catra like she is a TEASE) I always thought it'd be great. Who doesn't love oblivious gays? Their dynamic in this is also great, especially all the flirting and teasing. BUT, of course, it also a bit angsty too. I can promise you you'll love it!

10. Chocolate and Roses vs. Heartache by Trashibesensei 9000+ words

[High School AU][T]

Another high school AU...I know I have a problem leave me alone. This time, if you couldn’t tell by the title, there’s some heartache involved, because: this Valentines Day, Adora doesn’t spend it with her best friend (now ex bestie) Catra. Even despite her popularity that she now has due to being the star player of Bright Moon’s soccer team, she can’t shake of how much she yearns for her old friend. Somehow, even with all the angst, it is still sO fucking FUNNY, the way Mermista was written was great, and she had some of THE best lines. But yeah, it’s so pure and just - Catra needs a hug, Adora needs a hug, they need to hug EACH other tbh! It had a very nice and hopeful message, and also kinda surprised me with the end.

11. someone you like by caela 5000+ words

[High School AU][T]

As a gen z, or x, or whatever the fuck I am, I always appreciate a fic where the characters say stupid shit over Instagram to their crushes which results it getting a date to prom. Although I can assure you that would never happen to me. But this So FUCKING cute and funny so READ.

12. this is what it's like when we collide (this is how you bring me back to life) by azul (7daysoftorture) 5000+ words

@bluelipgloss

[Canon Universe][G]

This galaxy brain fic is amazing and that’s ThE TEA. Catra gets a wish stone from Hordak and we all knowww, WHO she (subconsciously) craves - Adora, which obviously leads to hell breaking loose, because, disaster gays. Anyway read this it’s great and made me feel forget about the cruel world we live in.

13. Five Times Catra was a Cat and One Time the Cat was Catra by sunscreams 2400+ words

@catradoramma

[Canon Universe][T]

A BELLE, well written 5 + 1 which is just pure fluff (some hurt/comfort too) and Catra being Catra (so a loveable pain in the ass) after joining Adora in Bright Moon.

14. Vital Signs by SereneKarma 2000+ words

@serene-karma

[Modern AU][G]

Like a dumbass Catra breaks her leg and gets put in hospital, but hey - it’s okay as long as she’s got a cute nurse to look after her! It’s pretty funny just based on the concept alone so read ThIs BiSh.

15. You put the cracks into my moral code by Littleamethystc 3000+ words

@littleamethystc

[Gang AU][T]

Catra is a hotshot mafia member, Glimmer and Bow are the PoPo, and Adora is underestimated as HELL. It’s also pretty funny, like the whole concept is just perfect, so check it out!

16. The Best Gift I Could Ever Ask For by blueninjasharpshooter 1500+ words

[Modern AU][G]

Just a short n sweet fic of Adora celebrating her birthday which she forgot, and also Adora has a pocket knife in her boot, which is so accurate lmaooo. As well as having the most accurate character portrayals, AWWWWwwwww, was my reaction to the end of this fic, so read it to find out wHY.

17. but i still don’t wish death on ‘em (i just reflect on ‘em) by ayushi_writes 1500+ words

@ayushipop

[Canon Universe][G]

(Post S1) A year after the battle of Bright Moon, Adora and Catra are standing on a cliff, and Catra finally has a chance to end it all. But WilL she?!?!  Let’s just say, Catradora are the queens of promises.

18. Whiskey and Eggnog by briony8969 3500+ words

@briony8969

[Modern Christmas AU][G]

A cute Christmas fic where a nervous Adora goes home for the first time in months with her new friends from college, scared of what they’ll think but more scared of a certain SOMEONE she hasn’t spoken to in months. So basically: sexual tension gAlore.

19. She's a Regular by BaronVonChop 1500+ words

@baronvonchop

[Coffee Shop AU][G]

Adora is gay. Catra is gay. Catra works at a coffee shop (badly), and Adora goes to said coffee shop soo much, that it gets on her friends nerves, coz she very obviously likes to flirt with a Catra. It’s funny too. That’s it. That’s the fic and I love it.

20. Hand in Hand, We Make Our Way to The End by thethirdphiladelphiavireo 6500+ words

[Canon Universe - Soulmate AU][T]

Catra and Adora figure out they are soulmates after years of not knowing what it meant, but OBVIOUSLY, cannot communicate like mature humans, because - same.

21. How Do You Tell A Girl You Really Like Her Eyes? by Gay_Panic 1000+ words

[Canon Universe][T]

(Pre Canon)Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, a very gay, very wholesome, very nice first kiss fic. They are very gay for each other in this one, they don’t even care if KYLE catches them kissing.

22. Tender Moments by yesimgay 1500+ words

[Canon Universe][G]

(Post-war) Catra still feels guilty about everything she did to Adora in the past, so instead of sleeping at the foot of the bed as usual , she decides to sleep next to Adora...So there’s fluff, lots of fluff, and it is very tender.

23. Perfectly intertwined by dragonesdepapel 2000+ words

[Canon Universe][G]

On Catra’s first official day in Bright Moon, Adora drags her to a festival and they do cute things and it’s cute, and you should defo read it.

24. a girl without freckles is like a sky without stars by dear_universe 900+ words

@catralovesgirls

[Canon Universe][G]

More bed sharing because I CANNOT help myself, I love fics like these! Catra can’t sleep without Adora on her first night at the rebellion, so, she knocks on Adora’s door and things go from there.

25. Something to remember you by by DBsean 3000+ words

[Canon Universe][G]

Adora sneaks back into the fright zone in attempt to retrieve something, when Catra catches her. It’s cute af. Despite the circumstances.

26. Skiffs & Ships by mysteryinc 900+ words

[Canon Universe][G]

(Pre-show) Just two gals being pals who missed each other a fuck ton while on separate missions. It’s pretty cute.

27. Starstruck by InvisiblePinkToast 2500+ words

@invisible-pink-toast

[Canon Universe][G]

(Pre-show) A lil bit of angst, and nightmares, and a little bit of fluff, Stargazing and bed sharing - what more could you need?

28. a truth so loud you can't ignore by adverbialstarlight 2500+ words

@adverbialstarlight

[High School AU][T]

Catra ignores the growing feelings she has for her best friend, until the truth is so loud she can’t ignore it (see what I did there?) But for real tho this fic really gave me angst that hurt my soul then fluff that healed it, so we StAN.

29. Horde kids are just Like That by gerti 1500+ words

[Canon Universe][T]

(Canon Divergence) What would happen if when Adora defected the Horde, her and  Catra where still girlfriends? Read this to find out because it’s FUCKING hilarious lmaoooo, like it’s so absurd but somehow still makes perfect sense.

30. The First Step by oldmountainsoul 2900+ words

[Canon Universe][T]

(Post S1) Apologies which end in getting shoved out off trees are now exclusively for the Catradora fandom only.

31. (You’re My) Haven by giraffewrites 400+ words

@giraffewrites

[Canon Universe - Pre Canon][G]

(Pre-Canon) Adora only kisses Catra when she thinks she’s asleep, but my girl Catra ain’t playing no more so one night she just goes in for the KILL, Aka, cute dorks just being cute dorks.

32. Beyond the Screen by SereneKarma 5000+ words

@serene-karma

[Youtuber AU][G]

If you can't tell I really like YouTuber AU's. Catra being the angsty gal she is starts a YouTube channel to rant about her old best friend who practically vanished when she was 15, and her viewers (who definitely have no life) end up finding her.

33. come on, sugar, don't you leave early by thesqian 1500+ words

Twitter: @crnkgmeplys

[Modern AU][G]

Two gays at a gay wedding, who clearly have some shit going on, but it’s okay because gay weddings always bring gays together. I said gay a lot in that sentence. Read the fic, it’s short n sweet and cute, so you can’t go wrong!

34. but we could never stay away (from each other) by adorassword 1500+ words

[Canon Universe][T]

Catra and Adora have a nice, not so nice chit chat on Adora’s balcony late at night, - these two need LOVE, and I needed a hug after reading this coz damn. Damn.

35. bad ideas by ranpoandpoe 1000+ words

[University AU][T]

How we all wish thinking about your crush at 2am would go. That’s the only context I’m giving, so READ IT.

Also, here are some of my fav one shots I’ve written:

Two Sides Of The Same Coin 1000+ words

[Gang AU][T]

If I was perfect 2500+ words

[Modern AU][T]

And check out my Catradora week series, however my fav is:

damn you, unrequited love 7000+ words

[Modern/Sixth Form AU][T]

Here are some more series packed with fics that I’ve really enjoyed too!

Catradora Oneshots by clicheusername5678 @hey-adora

Catradora Tumblr Prompts BY sunscreams @catradoramma

if I grind my teeth at night, would you hear it? By poetroe

in the bottom of a coffee cup  + pieces by inkwelled (their stuff is great)

Twitter: adorascatrq

Anyway, I hope you guys appreciate this, it took quite a while lol. I had a lot of fun making it, and I hope you check out some of the fics on the list (maybe all if you're a crazy mf)

Until next time (: