#i have iud and i don't fuck so it's not like it's a concern for me but still

[thevagabondexpress]

i need to extend a massive shout-out thank you to dairy farmers of america for buying up all the billboards in west virginia that used to be pregnancy care and especially unexpected pregnancy in an anti-abortion state care centers and putting ads for my favorite comfort drink up there instead. you made my road trip to canada 100% less dysphoric and generally uncomfortable

[strawberryblue-blog]

nsfw alphabet w Marc Guiu please 🙏🏼

A to Z —Marc Guiu.

summary: NSFW alphabet with Marc. warnings: YES. +18. smut, headcanon. words count: +850.

A - after care (what is it like after sex?)

He will probably be quite concerned. He'll want to know if you're feeling okay, if you need anything, if you're in pain or he might even help you clean yourself up.

B - body part (favorite part of your body and his)

In him maybe it's his back and abs, he works hard to maintain them and thinks it's something attractive about him. On you, he loves your smile madly and the way it never disappears from your face.

C - cum (anything about cumming)

Since you are already in a steady relationship, he will definitely come inside you (with birth control methods like the pill or IUD).

D - dirty secret (some dirty secret).

Maybe he has a little (healthy) obsession to dominate, he likes to be in control of the whole situation, to punish you, to insult you (only sexually) and something like that. All as long as you accept and he doesn't hurt you, of course.

E - experience (experience in sex)

He has a lot of experience, he may have acquired it over time or maybe he got it from porn or research.

F - favorite position (to fuck you)

Missionary with your legs over your chest to enhance the experience.

G - goofy (how serious is he during sex?)

He's pretty playful. Anything that pushes you over the edge and you can't take it anymore, he likes to tease (in a good way), etc.

H - hair (how do he/you take care of his/your privacy?)

He likes to have some, because he doesn't shave it often. He doesn't care about you at all but he know that you always try to keep it clean and free.

I - intimacy (what is it like during sex?)

It can get a little rough and wild, definitely the best sex with Marc.

J - jack off (masturbation, how much do he/you masturbate?)

Once or twice a week, in the shower maybe or in the morning when he wakes up very aroused but nothing more.

K - kink (fetishes during sex)

Saying dirty, dirty things to you. Using dirty nicknames on you, taking your face and saying them to your face, hitting your ass, even boobs.

L - location (places to have sex)

Anywhere. No problem with doing it outside the house, in the kitchen, in the car, in a hotel, in the yard, in a public restroom. Anywhere.

M - motivation (what excites him/you?)

When you sit on his legs or rest your body on his body, spooning type. Definitely feeling your ass on his crotch would turn him on right away.

N - no (what wouldn't he do with you?)

No to sharing you. Man or woman doesn't care. He couldn't see you with someone else.

O - oral (how does he like to give/receive?)

He prefers to receive. Blowjobs turn him on so much, if you blow him then he'll fuck you as a reward until you can't walk.

P - pace (how does he like to do it?)

Hard, deep and fast. He's an animal, he may come too fast but it won't take him long to come again and again.

Q - quickie (do he like quick sex?)

Yes. They don't bother him, in fact they tend to turn him on and help him to lower the tension.

R - risk (would he take risks? which ones?)

Any risks. He wouldn't mind getting caught, it's not a bad thing. It shouldn't be embarrassing as long as they never disrespect other people.

S - stamina (how long does it last during sex?)

He can last too long even until he sees you in tears (of pleasure). He could do it multiple times, fingers, mouth, cock, friction, etc.

T - toy (use toys)

Sometime or other he has used ties, blindfolds and handcuffs. For now that's all he has in mind but he would like to experience more things.

U - unfair (how much does he like to provoke you?)

Very much, he likes to provoke you. Kissing your nipples for hours while you squirm under him and beg him to touch you.

V - volume (how loud is it during sex?)

He is loud. Because he likes to talk he is usually a bit loud with his moans, gasps and words.

W - wild card (small random story)

The drive home was getting quite long as they were returning home after a dinner with Marc's mates. You were new to the city and you were still amazed at how nice London was but at this hour it was always chaos and right now you were stuck in traffic as the dark night surrounded you.

Marc's hand was on one thigh as your gaze was intent on the lights of the city. A squeeze on your leg made you turn your head.

A flirtatious smile appeared on Marc's lips and you narrowed your eyes.

"No, Marc" you said as you noticed his intentions in his bright eyes. His fingers began to knead your skin, giving tiny little touches beginning to feel your system warm up.

"Shhh" he murmured moving closer towards your neck and kissing your shoulder a little and then your neck. Your body bristled as you felt his wet lips begin to suck on your exposed skin as a gasp escaped from your side.

"We can't, baby" you stammered as his legs hid in your skirt and caressed your center.

"Just let me do it, you enjoy" he whispers into your lobe before licking it.

X - x-ray (how big is it and how?)

Big. Very big. Maybe that's why he's so sure of himself because he knows what he has and he also knows how to use it very well.

Y - yearning (how long can desire last?)

His appetite is usually very high but sometimes he needs some love and he understands that not everything is sex.

Z - zzz (how is his sleep after sex?)

Due to all the adrenaline of the moment it takes him a while to fall asleep but then he is a rock and in the morning it will be hard to wake him up.

[writefinch]

FRIENDLY CHAT

Hey! Sorry to pull you in here before your break, we just need a quick chat. So, long story short, uh, a customer complained that you point-blank offered him a condom.

This isn't the first time. You know it's against company policy. You're only supposed to get them if the customer requests it first. Like, you're not even supposed to have them on display. I know that part is stupid, but if the regional manager checks the tapes and sees condom bowls in plain view, I'd still get written up.

No, no, absolutely not, I'm not going to write you up. I don't think it's necessary and you know it goes totally against my management style. I want to talk through your concerns.

I wanna remind you that we take all the recommended industry-standard precautions. In fact we go above them! First off, you're fully vaxxed, and that's the end of ninety percent of things to worry about, period. You've got an IUD on the company health plan, even though your T-shots probably suppress it. The customers get a physical screen in the waiting area. All us boys and girlies get tested every three weeks, twice as frequent as the industry standard.

That's already extensive, it makes you safer than the vast majority of people in our line of work. If we did any more, customers will get the wrong idea. They'll think we're an unclean brothel with unclean customers. It'd remind them too much of all the you-know-what from the past few years.

Yes, you're not wrong about that. Breakthrough infections happen, and people get sick. But you know what I'm gonna say? You're very robust, you know that? You've been here for what, eighteen months, you've been pulling long hours and beacoup extra shifts and you've barely caught a sniffle. The testosterone must be helping!

Now you might not stay this lucky forever, that's why we have six paid sick days and a flexible admin rota. Usually when you catch something it'll be a mild itch and trouble peeing. You won't even wanna rest, and yeah you won't get the full rate for paid clients, you can still get paid to do the laundry and the paperwork for a week while it clears up.

Every year I get a couple of colds from my kids and take three or four days off, and every year I always get a VD from one of the clients and spend a week washing sheets and cleaning dildos. You know what that gives me? Two or three days rolled over into vacation time!

Yes, you can get unlucky. You can get a couple of back-to-back infections. I tell every boy and girl who starts here the same thing: before they take out a loan on a new car or move out of their toxic roommate situation, make sure to get two weeks pay in a savings account. Even if you do have to dip into your rainy day fund, you know full well that there's always extra shifts to pick up around here.

Yeah, you can catch something nasty. You can have a bad reaction. We all remember how scary it was before the vaccines were available. But here's the thing: you drive to work, right? You're on the freeway twice a day. Forty-thousand people die every year in car crashes, and tens of thousands more get life-changing injuries. You don't spend every day worrying about that, right?

You just get on with it and live your life.

Look, I'm really sorry about this whole thing. You're really special to me, you know that? You're a genuine friend to me, I mean that. We get on really well, all the girls love you, you're a hit with clients and that's why I jumped on this y'know? This job is only as fun as the people here make it, and I don't want to see you written up for something that can be talked out.

Discipline here is so stupid. I'm fucking sick of the owners hassling girls, and boys, out of working here and then crying and bitching when we can't meet customer demand.

I said I'd be out of here as soon as I get my HVAC cert but if they put us all through that again I'll just quit on the spot. That's why I want to look out for you. You've helped me through some really difficult times, on shift and off. I wouldn't have been able to get through junket season without you. I'm serious, if you hadn't joined when you did, there'd be gun laws named after me.

Thanks for listening, and again, I'm sorry for even bringing this stuff up. Just promise you'll keep what I've said in mind? We've all got to look out for each other here.

Hey, once you're back from break, can I have your help with something? I've got a no-refusal client and well, all the other girls refused. What? No I don't want you to take him, c'mon man I'm not gonna let you off a written warning to guilt you into picking up my shit, honestly! No, I'm the supervisor on shift so it's up to me.

Anyway he's not into boys, even pretty ones like you, sorry. But he's a real charmer, so would you mind sticking close in case he starts throwing up or throwing hands? If I have to hit the panic button I think Sergei will throw him out of a window, and nobody needs that headache.

Thanks, I really appreciate it. We'll be in the spa room, so let me know when you're ready to play pool boy…

[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 3799

good lord.

the last, like, 36 hours have been so fucking stressful.

tw: friendship problems, toxic friendship. end marked by a meme or something.

i have had a fandom friend for about two years. she's been sweet and fun and silly and good to talk to, but any time i have taken more than 20 hours to reply, she has some at me accusing me of abandoning her when i reply. so i have had to spend many days in the last two years stressing over how to reply so she believes me that i have been just BUSY and not ignoring her or abandoning her.

this has happened multiple times. everyone i have spoken to about it has told me to block her. i have always given her another chance to be kinder and more understanding while resolving to be more communicative. i have done so. but this was my last straw.

i have done my absolute level best to be kind, respectful, and pacifying in my responses to not set her off again. but she's taken my words and actions in bad faith time and time again and i got tired of it.

so this time i told her point blank a few things, like i have done nothing wrong, she has impossible standards (of wanting to talk to me every single day and never going more than a day without messages), she should get therapy, and that i am capable of and allowed to feel more than one feeling at a time (just because i went to bed happy doesn't mean i'm not fucking upset about losing a friend).

but i told her that her needs and my abilities didn't match. i would not be able to live up to what she needed from our friendship.

i have spent HOURS crying about losing her as a friend. HOURS. time i will not get back. effort i will not get back. and while im happy i got to be her friend, i wish she believed me.

i've had to block her on all of the platforms where she and i were connected. if she gets better and owns her own shortcomings, separation anxiety, and abandonment issues, she can contact me somehow. until then, it's not my responsibility to worry about.

and yeah, i'm fucking sad.

but i still wish the best for her. and she's a good person, but she needs to get help. she's been toxic for me. i don't use that word lightly. but us not being friends is probably for the best for both of us. (the good news is that she's been making more friends recently, so her ditching me because i wasn't capable of living up to her needs won't leave her friendless. and that's good, because i know she worries about that.)

so. that's been most of the last day and a half for me.

anyway, after dealing with that, joel and i spent the day playing arkham horror. we finished the campaign we've been working on for a while, and it was both exhausting and frustrating because joel's character was defeated during either two of or all three of the scenarios we played today. my character was NOT built for fighting, so being the only investigator left and getting all the enemies on me at once did not work well lmao

also tmi here lmao

but also today, i have been feeling pressure on my bladder ALL DAY. i've felt like i've needed to pee but i haven't peed much when i've gone. and i started bleeding today, but it's not like a normal period bc the blood is all fresh, so i'm super concerned that my IUD has gotten dislocated?? which could potentially be reeeally bad 😅 so i gotta go to the doctor and check with some imaging that it's in the right place. i hope they can get me in tomorrow or sometime this week/weekend.

done tmi lol

and joel and i went out this evening after finishing our games and went in search of card sleeves, chips and dip, and dinner. we were successful in our endeavors, and we came back around 10:45. joel requested i wrap the gifts he got for our friends and i very happily sat and wrapped a bunch of gifts. i did GREAT. really proud of two of them. it's pretty impressive, i gotta say.

and now joel and i are in bed. my heart is still sad but my shoulders are lighter. gifts are wrapped, i've got one thing to worry about, and that's about it because my insurance will pay for my doctors appointments.

and i did talk to leo today on and off - his shift was today, so i talked to him while he was there a tiny bit and then after he left. man's horny on main and i fully understand lmao

so that's been my day. i'm so tired.

[btsqualityy]

Hola!!!! Drabble is going to be lit! So can we see Eunji finding out she’s pregnant with SoSo at one of her postpartum appointment. 😊

"Hi Eunji," Dr. Lee greeted her as she walked into the examination room, where Eunji was sitting patiently on the bed. "How are you?"

"Hi Dr. Lee," Eunji smiled. "I'm doing ok."

"And little Myung?" Dr. Lee wondered as she sat on the small stool and looked up at Eunji.

"He's great," Eunji nodded. "He's a chunky boy so he loves to eat so I feel like I spend most of my time these days just feeding him."

"Ohh, I remember those days all too well," Dr. Lee chuckled. "So, I know this isn't your first postpartum appointment but I still wanted to do a check in with you and see how you're feeling emotionally as well as physically."

"Well, I've been better emotionally than I thought I would," Eunji began. "I thought I'd struggle establishing a bond with Myungie because I've never really thought of myself as being maternal but I didn't have anything to worry about. I love him so much and I love being his mama."

"That's great," Dr. Lee nodded.

"Physically, the recovery was definitely difficult since Myungie was a chunky baby," she sighed. "He's almost five months old but I still don't feel like myself."

"That's typical," Dr. Lee said. "It can take up to a year for you to feel like yourself again."

"Trust me, I can't wait," Eunji sighed.

"Are there any concerns you wanted to address with me?"

"I was hoping that maybe I could explore some birth control options with you?" Eunji said. "Preferably long term ones."

"Sure, we can definitely do that," Dr. Lee nodded. "Are you thinking of an IUD or the implant for your arm?"

"Absolutely," Eunji nodded. "Though I love being a mom more than I though I would, I'm not looking to add anymore babies to the family right now."

"That's fair," Dr. Lee smiled. "Lets get you to produce a urine sample first and then we'll go from there, alright?"

"Ok," Eunji nodded. After peeing in the provided sample cup, Eunji waited for a little while before Dr. Lee made her way back into the room.

"So, something came up on the results from your urine sample and we won't be able to give you any birth control today," Dr. Lee began.

"Why not?" Eunji wondered.

"You're pregnant, Eunji," Dr. Lee announced and Eunji just stared at her for a few seconds before she burst out laughing.

"Good one, Doc," Eunji huffed. "Seriously."

"I am being serious, Eunji," Dr. Lee confirmed and the smile slid right off of Eunji's face. "I'd like to examine you so that we can see just how far along you are."

"O-ok," Eunji stammered and before she knew it, she was laying on her back while Dr. Lee inserted a small probe.

"Looks like you're about 6 weeks," Dr. Lee announced as she pointed to the screen. "There they are."

"Oh my god," Eunji muttered to herself as she looked. "I'm really fucking pregnant."

"Congratulations," Dr. Lee said.

"I'm gonna murder him," Eunji murmured to herself, silently planning out her husband's murder in her head.

[leaveherwildliketheflowers]

Summoned to jury duty for the first time today and I am bored out of my mind. Normally I would kill for this level of down time but, you know, in the comfort of my own home. Anyway, using this as an excuse to get some thoughts out here. Putting in a cut to save your feed. TW for suicidal thoughts and weight mention.

Last week in therapy I was finally able to verbalize how I experience certain feelings/situations. It only took 4 years 😅. T was very kind and gentle and said it is textbook CPTSD responses and that I'm in fact not "crazy". It was nice to have that validation since I have spent my whole life convinced I make these things up since I don't have a "why" behind the feeling. But idk where to go with this now. I suppose that's a question for T.

I'm very determined to be the break in my families generational trauma.

Grief is a fucking bitch.

I really miss my twins. I miss them every day but that ache is stronger lately. There was a rainbow on my drive downtown this morning and I know they sent it for me 🤍

M is the absolute best. She searches for me now and gives me the biggest belly laughs when we play. It melts me. She is everything my shattered heart needed.

M loves to play with my necklace that has the twins handprints on it and I really love that.

Mood is better since IUD removal. Not perfect, but I don't want to kill myself daily so that's progress.

I want another baby.

I'm within 3 pounds of my (healthy) pre pregnancy weight. I clarify healthy because I intentionally gained weight before getting pregnant and I have no desire to be at the weight I was in the thick of the eating disorder. I gained a lot of weight in pregnancy. Like double the recommended gain. It all came off without trying. Aside of lugging M around and taking a daily walk I really haven't been exercising. I absolutely have not watched what I eat. I'm not sure if this is good or concerning, but I'm trying to take it for what it is. Maybe my body can maintain itself at my healthy weight without my intervention? What a wild thought.

[ghoulangerlee]

Ohhhhh my god I feel you on this whole bc shot thing. I've been on it for a little over two years because I'm trans and getting my period was so bad for my emotional wellbeing I had to do something. I didn't wand an IUD, and I forget to take my medication a lot so the pill wasn't ideal. I was told by two different obgyns that they wouldn't consider removing the uterus becsuse at the time I was only 21 and ""What if you chsnge your mind!!!"" 🙄🙄🙄🙄 so I really dint have a whole lot of options.

On one hand I like not having to worry about the whole thing for 10/11 weeks at a time but on the other hand I also really like not having feeble bones! I've been taking calcium supplements but the pills are huge and I worry it isn't covering the issue entirely. I don't get enough calcium to begin with becsuse I can't drink milk and stuff, so I worry that it's a bandage on a knife wound so to speak.

Last time I was at the clinic for my shot I raised the issue again and the doctor there was like "wait you're literally trans and have no plans for children why the hell don't we just get rid of it????" And I'm just sitting there like why the fuck did the last two people I see not give me this option!?

Anyways I need to discuss the idea more with her but oh oh to get this fucking thing out of me....oh to dream....

Sorry rambling in your asks but this sucks and I sure hope we both get the cool fun and fresh resolution :)

oh my god anon, i feel you. i've been on it for...almost 5 years now? I think around August 2019 is when I started it finally. It was unfortunately the only option we could find for me. I actually can't have any bc that has actual estrogen in it because of my high blood pressure and the family history of blood clots. And like, at first it was fine and dandy! I was okay with it because after 7 weeks of a heavy cycle I was so exhausted and just ready for it to be over. And it's been gone! pretty regularly for the last several years.

Sometimes if I'm incredibly stressed it will sneak up on me but it's like, leagues better than it was. Max 3 days and barely anything at all. So, very manageable for someone who y'know. had it much worse (to the point it would cause my iron to drop significantly all the time).

I hate obgyns who refuse to do things because "you might regret it later on" like, no actually I think I'll regret having this thing inside my body I don't intend to use and having to stay on the shot for the rest of my life. I'm in a same-sex relationship, I don't ever intend to physically carry a child, I just want the thing gone lmao. I've told obgyns that in the past and yet they still insisted on telling me that I might "regret" it.

So, my surgeon did mention that viactiv is a good supplement, which is apparently a chocolate calcium chew haha. My biggest concern is that I have osteoarthritis and being over 30 now, my bone density doesn't come back as fast as it does for someone in their 20s. My doctor is also concerned about it too. I mean like also the weight gain is terrible too, like holy shit it's been the worst (strong ass bc, strong ass side effects I GUESS)

THOUGH APPARENTLY there is a bone density therapy that they can do which will help with keeping your bones strong. I didn't know about it and no one ever thought to mention it to me when they started talking about my bone density lmao. Normal Calcium supplements make me extremely nauseous and I can't take them, so I just stopped lmao.

And I think from there, that's when I sort of decided I wanted to look into getting rid of my uterus for good. Like, I don't plan to have kids, I don't need it. Why should I continue this shot, why should I keep putting myself through this.

Also, idk if you've experienced it, or if its just because I been on it for so long or if it's something else entirely, but in place of the period I just get cramps :) really bad ones :) it's great and what I've always wanted from bc haha.

honestly that's a good doctor, why haven't they suggested it sooner? Literally the surgeon I'm seeing is, ironically, the first obgyn I saw when I switched insurances and go to where I go now, and from the beginning she was like "you're in a monogamous same-sex relationship whenever you want the surgery we can just take care of that" and idk I wasn't in the right place then, I think, to consider it.

yeah it's a long process from my understanding, we're building a case right now, as my surgeon called it, gonna have some imaging stuff done, a few more tests and then we'll set the date and just. remove it. thankfully, no early menopause for me (ironically the One Thing i was most worried about?? I don't know, I've got so much going on, I didn't want to even consider dealing with menopause bc guess what the treatment for that is-- the same damn shot I'm trying to escape lmao) ANON!!! I wish the best for both of us!!! Let me know how things go!! (if you're comfortable!!)

[por-siempre-aqui]

So E and I didn't end up going to LACMA but its okay. Maybe we will get the chance to eventually.

I really like him so far. I feel extremely comfortable talking to him. I told him about a dating couple experiences, he told me about a couple of his. He told me I need to stay away from homeless sexuals. I hate that the term fits. S had nowhere to go and another guy J who I dated also ended up being homeless for a while.

Some people don't have places to stay or family that loves em.

He told me he likes that I'm not a loud city girl, I'm a shy suburban valley girl type and that he can tell that I'm nurturing. It's not the first time I've been told that they can tell I am a nice girl or I have a very loving nature.

It's nice to hear. He told me that I'm very understanding.

I said that's kinda my thing.

I really liked that when we were in the ramen place he made sure to keep making conversation and he asked me questions, even though I didn't feel comfortable talking because I was so stoned I didn't care. Also I didn't have to worry about driving myself because he drove the entire time.

I think I kinda fucked up because I ended up telling him about S and our break up. I didn't feel stupid for being honest, but maybe I revealed too much too soon. And that was on the drive to the ramen spot.

Before we went into the restaurant he made sure to smoke me out and he also brought a canna drink.

After we finished smoking I was too stoned to walk so we hung out in the car for a bit. Then to pass the time we decided to kiss for a bit. Before we knew we were heavy petting. And then we kind of realized we needed to slow down, the ramen was really tasty I actually really loved their broth.

After ramen he luckily knew a place where he could park and we could make out for a while. We went to his backseat and we kissed for a while and then he turned his attention to my skort lol. I was wearing a skort with garter fishnet tights plus black panties lol.

I looked and felt sexy af

It gave him easy access and thankfully he is very attentive. I mean I definitely felt like he owed me he's been talking about making me feel good since we started talking four years ago.

He found it very hot that I was very wet and he wasted no time making sure I would relax and let him make me feel good. He assured me that pleasuring me turns him on, and I can relate because same.

And he took advantage of that. When I bent over to give him some attention he did not neglect my needs! He made sure to finger me and not only that, it felt fucking amazing while he was doing it!

And I made sure to return the favor and then he would stop me to make out with my sloppiness, he told me I was making him feel too good and he would try to one up me. He said 69 is gonma be really fun with me. 🥵

Now that I know he can make me feel good in that situation I am excited to explore more together. I brought up STI testing and explained why it is a concern of mine. He said he's happy to get tested together. He said he only has sex with condoms on and he's only had sex without a condom on twice. And he is someone who is sexually experienced so I find it very responsible very mature and hot.

It's a huge weight lifted for me because I was used to S telling me he didn't want to use a condom, he wouldn't even try and when I would bring it up it turned into an argument.

E doesn't wanna have a baby scare, neither do I. I'm not currently on BC. I'm still on the fence about the copper IUD. But I'm gonna have to try again at planned parenthood. Tbh right now I'm just happy that we are on the same page about safe sex. It's gonna make it more enjoyable.

I'm feeling great. He's not my bf I'm not his gf. It was a lot of fun. Hopefully we can continue to have fun and eventually have fun sex together.

[legitalicat]

I am a recovering alcoholic. I am a year and a half sober. I drank heavily for about 1-2 years. I'm talking like 4-6 8oz cups half full of vodka (that is a lot of vodka). I found out today that my liver is enlarged, most likely due to my past drinking.

At 24, I am facing the very real possibility I have fucked my liver, and the rest of my health, up. My dad told me I shouldn't really be concerned, but I've been sick for a while now. It's been really bad the last few months. I'm not sure if my symptoms (which basically boils down to my entire digestive system is angry) and the enlarged liver is related. Fuck I'm not sure if my liver being enlarged is even related to my drinking, but that's what I'm thinking.

I spend a significant amount of time with pain in my abdomen. I spend a significant amount of time in the bathroom. I don't eat as much as I should, and what I do eat is probably not what I should, but they're usually the only things that don't make me cry.

Again, I don't know if all of this is related to my drinking. But I'm scared either way. I'm scared that, once again, a decision I have made has significantly impacted my health (I have lessened fertility due to an incident trying to get an IUD, a decision I made against all advice out of fear). And I'm scared that if it's not related to my drinking, whatever God or maker is out there has decided that after a life of misery, I get to deal with this too now that I'm finally happy.

And if you wanna know why this scares me so much, look up what all can cause an enlarged liver. None of it is great I can tell you that.

I don't really know why I'm putting this here. I guess this is my attempt to shout something out and get it off my chest without worrying everyone else I love. Maybe I want to connect with someone, anyone, who deals with this too. Or maybe I'm just so fucking angry and women are not allowed to be outwardly angry without running the risk of everyone writing them off for being crazy or dramatic. I don't know.

But fuck.

[words-writ-in-starlight]

I got an IUD placed a week ago and I am still in a great deal of pain and as such I’m exercising my right to regress to a small child who just wants to talk about X-Men.

[jadedsnowtiger]

Just a dribble, of Daddy Dicks life.

There wasn't much Dick was afraid of, he had learned long ago though hard training to control his fear.

But Rachel was one of them. Nothing was scarier than a woman. Especially one that was starting to experiment with her sexual sides, losing that battle to her inner demon. 

Rachel outright scared him. She was trying her hardest to talk through her emotions and feelings without understanding them. It was hard for her to express what was going on inside her head.  

Rachel had chosen him to be the one to talk to. He was the one she trusted most to talk to, and it was not easy, they both blushed and laughed though most conversations.

But it was then Dick noticed she was spending more time behind closed doors with male team members that really made him worry. Not that he didn't trust them. They were his kids, even if they didn't want to be adopted. 

But the father's side of him was concerned.  Over the last two weeks Rachel had started to relax more and he was finding her in difficult positions. 

The first time he was going through the dining room, after a long patrol he catches Rachel wrapped in an octopus type hug from a topless Conner.

Not that he didn't trust Superboy, he fully did. The young man was very much his superfather's son. He was very open to his emotions, and would talk or ask about anything without shame. 

"Night terror." The blue eyes turned as Conner noticed him. "I was watching static and she came out in a panic."

Dick nods, "Where's your shirt?"

"Sleep naked."

Teenagers, fuck where the original Titans this bad?   Yes. Dick grew up besides the likes of Speedy, The Flash, and himself.

The second time Dick and Kori where heading to there bedroom for a afternoon nap, when they passed Tim's room. The sounds of laughter coming from the other side of the door.

"Take off your skirt." Tim's voice laughed though the door. "

"Don't you dare!"  Rachel voice ran out.

"Oh, I will and you will sit there and enjoy it."

Kori led him away as he looked to the door in fear.

The third time he knew he died.

Dick walked towards Gars room, the kid was late again for practice. He was fully determined to make him suffer.

"Man, I am telling you, I cant use condoms they don't work on me."

"You wanna be with her." Conner spoke.

"Its.. look ... my penis is ..You know, like a dog?  It came with the body upgrade, like my elf ears."  Gar sounded bashful.

Dick felt the world leave him.

The fourth time, he realized she was no longer his little baby.

"Daddy?"

A timid Rachel  came into his office, closing the door behind her for privacy. 

"What's up?"

"Dad, I.."  she looked so flustered, she must have taken a long time to work up the nerve.  " I would like to get an IUD."

Dick wasn't expecting that, no wonder Rachel was so nervous. 

"An IUD?" 

"Birth control, you know."  She spoke as if in trouble, she was so red in the face.

"I know, it's common to go on some form of it." Dick nodded, as he walked to her side.  "Can I ask who?"

Rachel blushed, looking away. 

"You can't sleep with all three of them, Rachel."

She looked up, her face full shook. "What? No, no. Dad. Just Gar."

Rachel's eyes watched over him,  she was fighting to remain calm. " Why do you think I am with everyone?"

"You and Tim last week, he was yelling at you to remove your skirt."

"Oh."  Rachel laughed for a second. "Okay maybe hearing that behind a door was the best. It's not what you think."

"Oh, try me."  

"Tim likes to wear dresses when he's behind closed doors."  Rachel shook her head. "He's trying to decide on what style he likes, so when I wear something new, he tries it on."

Dick was taken back, that was a bit to unload at once. Rachel was so accepting, how could she be the thing that people once feared.

"Conner?"

"Is my big brother." Rachel smiles at him. "Big, warm, soft, its like cuddling a hairless bear"

Dick laughs, as he kisses her head. 

"Alright,  why do you want an IUD and not the needle?"

"It's a needle, dad." She said dead panned. 

[kandadiff]

Runnin' with the Devil 1

-

You watched your husband from your place on the couch and pulled your legs into your body in an attempt to warm them, your mind wandering to just a year ago. Where you were in the warm arms of Jay Park, spoiled with champagne and as much sweet things as you could fill yourself with. But now . 'Nothing like how it used to be,' You thought. You missed Jay, he made you laugh, not that you did much of that these days. How could you? When you were in the same house with your biggest enemy?

Your eyes wandered over to the massive ring that stood out on your finger, making your hand look even smaller then it already was. The huge diamond complimented by the other diamonds that rounded the rock, gold encasing their holding and a small red dragon engraved within the main diamond. It was no mistake what this ring truly symbolized. You belonged to him now, The Red Dragons and the Kwon Family.

Your mind floated to when the Red Dragon rescued you from the Brotherhood. You were with Jay on his arm at one of his lavish parties that he threw every year to keep the peace between the families that ran the state. Except instead of the night being filled with the sound of laughter from to much drinks and music from the DJ, it was swollen with blood and gun shots. At first it was Jay that grabbed you when he heard the first gun shot ring out into the air made by some hired man. He pushed you to his second in command, Jackson, and you were with Jackson for a long time until a bullet went through his chest and your face became streaked red. Another Brotherhood member, Chan Bang, grabbed you and seemed to bring you toward the masked intruders who in shock all you could do was watch as they shot down people like it was a sport. Most of them laughing as they did so. You fought against Chan, but maybe it was the excessive alcohol your drank that made you unable to get out of his iron grip or the fear of being next. One of Chan's close friends, Hyungjin brought Min and Suzy, a short bubbly girl and a baby faced angel of a girl who were dating another brotherhood member, and you watched as the masked man shoot both of them point blank as they begged for there life before he pointed the gun at you.

yA pop rang out in the air and instead of you going into the pile of bodies with Min and Suzy, it was the masked man. POP! Another one shot down Chan, you came loose from his grip as he fell into the piles. However before you could run the shooter grabbed you. "Let's go!" his voice was rough but his touch was gentle yet urgent. He led you through the ballroom avoiding the gunshots with skill, as though he was trained for this his entire life. You knew who he was, everyone did. Jiyong Kwon, son of YoungHwan Kwon leader of the Red Dragon's and next to take over. Once you were outside he rushed you into a car and drove as fast as he can while cops sped past him heading to the bloody scene which would later be called THE BALLROOM MASSACRE.

He brought you back to his lavish penthouse and brought a doctor (thats how you reconnected with me) to check on you and him. Physically, you were unhurt minus a few scratches but mentally- you were not. He suggested you stay with him for a few days until everything cooled down. And during that time, the news of the event, soiled your mind more and more everyday as more and more bodies were counted as dead. People you knew, people who you laughed with, cried with, loved. Gone. No news of what happened to Jay - you presumed he was dead. Only seeing Jackson on the TV, beat up and on crutches. Through all that Jiyong was there for you, one drunken night bringing you close, spilling secrets to each other with the only witness the fire that burned in the fireplace as you drank. Those few days turned into months and soon you found yourself in love with the man especially when he drafted another peace treaty with the other mafia families and excited those who killed at the Ballroom Massacre.

Which is how you ended up with two children babbling upstairs. You aren't sure how you became pregnant - not at first at least. You were careful or at least you thought you were. You used condoms, even had an IUD. But one day you were feeling nauseous and bloated and tender and he suggested going to the doctor. He made me come to the house and take blood, a few minutes later you found you were pregnant. And though Jiyong tried to hide it, we argued or were cold with each other every time we saw each other. 7 months later you gave birth to Anastasia Min-Lee Kwon and Apollo Taehyun Kwon and you were married at a huge ceremony in the city that was more protected then the royal family. But like all good things, that too must come to an end and thats when your life, which seemed to be going to well fell apart in your hands.

"About" stomach turned as you thought about that day only a week and a half ago. You sat in my house, a smaller less extravagant house then yours however the garden that surrounded it was a perfect place to sit. A gazebo gifted to us by Jiyong after I helped you after the massacre, is where we sat. Eating at the small table watching while, Marceline and Salem played with the babies, your nannies enjoying that they are getting a quick break in this picturesque area.

You smiled hearing the sound of your babies laughing, happy to hear it without your father in law interrupting the noise, you were about to comment on it when I interrupted your thoughts. "I wish I could have protected them better." Your eyebrow raised at the serious of my tone but before you could ask I spoke again "with Marcie mostly," I clarified "Salem - he doesn't know all that Marceline knows." I hadn't really gotten into what happened in the past before I showed up back in this town. But I left with a man named Negan and came back with a little girl and a friendship with Mr. YoungHwan Kwon and a body guard only known to you as Suga.

You weren't sure what to say so you said "We do all we can, you know. You're a good mother." You looked at me concerned seeing something clearly on my mind. "Whats wrong?"

"I'm sorry, adi." Confused you just looked at me waiting for me to explain. "I wished I could have protected you too."

Your mind flicked to the bloody mess of that night and you shook your head, in an attempt to stop thinking about it. "You couldn't have known, you weren't even there."

"I wished that I could have protected you from Jiyong," I said and your mind swirled in even more confusion. "I should have warned you when he took you from Jay. But I didn't want to believe he would do that- I was so stupid. Yoongi told me but I didn't believe him. Then when you got pregnant- Yoongi and me were trying to have Sunday. He was so happy when he first held him, I don't think ive ever seen him happier. The smile didn't leave his face for weeks and even now every time he speaks about the kids his face still lights up the same way it did all those years ago. He even tattooed there names on his chest, that was the first thing he did out of the hospital. I saw the same thing in Taeyang when he had his son, and in Bom and her husband; just pure unfiltered joy." You raised an eyebrow about to ask what that had to do with anything when I looked at you. "When I Jiyong told me you were pregnant, that look - wasn't there. It was something else; something darker, like he had just accomplished his master plan. Then I remembered you told me you had an IUD and you wore condoms. So after I took your blood, I went into your bedroom and searched until I found the condoms and went to the sink. I filled all of them with water and each one had holes in it. I told Yoongi about it and he questioned the other doctor on Jiyong's payroll - after about an hour with Yoongi he admitted to drugging your wine and taking it out."

Your heart sunk, no, your husband wouldn't do that to you. I was mistaken - it had to be some kind of joke. You shook your head but I nodded.

"Its true." I said "and he found out I knew, thats when you caught us arguing. He knew after getting you knocked up, you'd marry him. He pretended he was the perfect husband so why wouldn't you?" You looked down at your ring instantly feeling nauseous.

"Why didn't you say something?!" you shouted bitterly catching the attention of the nannies. I waved at them to continue and told you to stay quiet. "Why should I?!"

"Because he's listening." I said motioning to the ladies. One of them carried a small device pinned to her chest, it was supposed to be just a pin but I knew what they were. A little transmitter like Negan used to use.

You're heart beat fast in your chest and you forced yourself to be quieter. "why didn't you tell me?" I motioned once again to the kids. "Oh please, Jiyong wouldn't kill kids." I sighed and unfolded a small series of pictures. There you saw pictures - candid shots of mine and Yoongi's small family, shopping, eating, taking them to school along with a phone number written in Jiyong's district handwriting along with the words 'Keep my secret and ill keep yours'. "What does this mean? who's phone number is this?"

"Negan's." I said simply and before you can ask why can't he know I stopped you. "I didn't just leave Negan. I escaped from him, he wouldn't let me leave and he killed everyone who tried to help me or talk to me. His entire fucking compound is decorated with the body parts of people I used to be friends with. He wanted me to rely on him and only him. He wouldn't even let me out with Marcie without him. When I left he told me he'd kill Marceline in front of me if I didn't come back to him. For the next week he killed a woman every single day, just cause they sort of looked like me. The day I got out of that town he killed a woman and her son because he thought it was me and Marcie in disguise, the little boy was only 4 years old and he shot him in front of his mother and strung her up on a tree in the park. Imagine what he would do to them" I looked at the laughing children, "or Yoongi, I know if I ever see Negan again I'm dead but I'm not going to let him find out about anyone else."

For a while you were silent, sitting in the news that shattered your view of your once perfect family. "Why now?" You asked after a while.

"We're leaving - it's the only safe option and I want you to come with us. Take your children and come with us. You aren't safe there." I said and you let out a shaky sigh "Yoongi is the best at disappearing; we'll be untraceable." You heard the nannies in the distance telling the kids its time to go inside and I stood up. You eyes wandered to the children running towards you while the nannies, wheeled the baby carriages over towards us.

"Mommy!" Marceline shouted holding up a handful of flowers "Look!" The nannies approached at a quick speed, to quick for your liking; if you were going to meet me, how were your going to know where?

"Look like its time to go Mrs. Kwon" one of them said to you "Mr. Kwon is calling."

"Good;" I smiled acting as though I didn't drop that bomb on you. "Have a good trip home," I lifted your twins out of there carriage and kissed each on the cheek. "say goodbye to your aunt." My children wrapped there small arms around your legs shoving flowers into your hands and pockets, causing you to laugh and hug each of them. I hugged you tight and picked up a flower that fell from your pocket and put it in your hand where you felt the soft piece of paper wrapped smoothly around the stem. "I hope to see you soon."

Now a week and a half later you still had the piece of paper buried in the small flap under the felt of your jewelry box watching as Jiyong laughed with TOP at a show they were both watching wondering how your life got so fucked up.

-

[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 3777

work was stressful. my first student was stressing me out about her work. i'll be working with her again tomorrow.

the other two were fine.

kendall was having a bad day so i offered her the whoopie pie i brought to eat around lunchtime. i hope she enjoyed it.

after work i went to get my IUD placed. yes i was told it would cramp. yes i was told to take advil or tylenol before i went in. i was not told i would want to throw up. i was also too stressed to even think about remembering to take advil or whatever before. so i yelled "fuck" on the table and stayed there in pain until they were done.

anesthesia should be required. if they can do brain surgery while someone is awake and not have them feel it, they can do it for when the doctor manually opens your goddamn cervix. NOT fucking okay.

i managed to be home and do a few things without too much pain before needing to rest again. i helped with the quilt. i watched a few episodes of oak island. thankfully everything else feels normal, and also thankfully the cramps now feel like normal cramps. given they feel like bad cramps, my periods used to be way worse than this. thank god for modern medicine.

anyway, i'm fucking exhausted and i'm hungry. i don't want to eat because that's a decision i would need to make. so i will just go to sleep.

have not texted joel today but leo is concerned about my health but is happy that i was able to do something for myself, even if it took him as motivation to go see the doctor (it did). (i desperately didn't want to go but i wanted him to raw me so i made the appointments to see the doctor.)

that's all. thanks, buddy. ❤️

[hephs-thighs]

Can I just say, from the bottom of my heart: FUCK THIS.

Do we really need to be trying to make people even more afraid of birth control pills?

Birth control pills can cause mood changes as a side effect, but NOT for most users. More people report they have a positive effect on hormonal mood changes than negative! Meaning they are more likely to HELP with depression!

They absolutely can have side effects, they're not the right choice for everyone, but it varies significantly based on pill type and between individual patients. If you're concerned about side effects, talk to your doctor! Or at the very least look up information on legitimate medical resources.

"Literally depression pills" - FUUUUCK YOUUUU.

It's like saying Tylenol is "literally nausea pills" because it's possible for a minority of patients to experience that.

Also: Your partner should never be thanking you for taking birth control, because you should never take birth control for your partner's sake!

You should only take birth control if it's the right medical choice for YOU. If your partner is so whiny and entitled that condoms are a deal-breaker for them, go ahead and break that deal! You don't need them!

Pills are not 100% effective, and they become even less effective if you're not taking them at the same time every day or if you miss a day. Condoms add barrier protection which will significantly reduce the likelihood of getting pregnant on the pill.

Condoms also protect you from STDs. Unless you and your partner got fully tested before starting to have sex, you don't know they don't have one. People can spread STDs without having symptoms. If your partner is trying to harass and guilt you into having sex without a condom, you cannot trust them.

That being said, birth control pills (and other non-condom contraception - IUDs, implants, shots, etc.) can be a great option for many people. Many people take them for their positive side effects on acne, menstrual pain, and more.

TL;DR - Don't let bullshit Tweets influence your medical decisions and don't let your boyfriend talk you out of using condoms.

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

She's 17 and ran off with her soulmate boyfriend.

Her father instead of getting a norplant birth control instead banned her from seeing the soulmate. Instead of trusting she has common sense or self control banned her from seeing her soulmate. So she ran away on her own.

Completely cleaned her closet out and all her room but her mattress. Her father didn't even notice she was packing over a number of weeks.

The FBI decided he was neglectful and mentally abusive to his daughter and decided the safest place was not in her father's care.

Until he gives his daughter the respect she deserves the law enforcement will protect her. Her soulmate has actually gained custody of her through the foster care system and is paid to take care of her through the foster care network.

She has Medicaid and food stamps and a nice new home surrounded by military families. A house i paid for. She also has an IUD but had yet to have sex before she was protected and she and he both had STD tests willingly before having consensual sex. If they have or have not had it is not my concern. I know an IUD implementation is extremely painful for about a week. Our bodies try to reject it so its like being in labor for 4 days. It was for me and walking was the only thing that helped. I had one. But she chose that because it lasts up to 10 years.

Its a lot of cramping plus they scrape the area to implant it. Removing doesn't hurt. It's just pressure and takes 5 minutes. They're worth it. But many people aren't aware of the pain.

She was informed but chose it anyway as she was a virgin and wanted to see the pain of having labor and contractions. She's not looking forward to having a kid.

So her father owes her an apology for calling her stupid and trying to convince her she is. And her mom as well for not trying to defend her. Or allow hee to go behind her fathers back with her consent. Like "go with 5 girls and 5 of their soulmates to the movies and ice cream after and invite him if he would like to go"

A dozen kids trying to fuck in a movie theater is gonna be a problem. A dozen kids trying to fuck anywhere is a problem. And theres no reason a parent couldn't tag along and sit behind them.

There isn't. A 17 year old is still a child. That is why she is in foster care.

I don't like to see children running away. But i hate more that they're abused and shut down and not given a chance to live.

So i do have multiple systems set up for runaways so they are not on the streets. Are protected and safe and have a legal guardian. If the oldest soulmate is 15 they may be taken into foster care or adopted by a member of the family. Preferably a grand parent but also any one in the military.

This way they are given respect but they must have long term birth control that is longer than one year to qualify for free housing.

I buy them a small house. 200-300 square feet. They can actually use a truck to move and they live on their own in the yard of their guardian. Who is responsible for emergencies, Dr appointments making sure they have food and clothing and bills paid and teaching them life skills If both are under age 18.

If one or more is over 18 i buy them a large regular size home. 1,300 square feet. Which they can also move with a larger truck. A manufactured home or trailer/mobile home. Double wide. Usually used. But in like new condition. If available. If not then new. Usually then it's a bit smaller like 900-1000 sq feet.

But it's in their name with a charity lein. So they own it But they cannot sell it. If they want another home they turn it in and we pay cash according to the condition of the home so they can have a down payment for a larger or newer home of their choice.

Then the younger kids at 18 can turn in their tiny homes for a larger manufactured of 1300 sq feet.

So they have to be reported missing by a parent and of a certain age and maturity and certain home conditions. Then the FBI must be contacted and they take control of the case.

4 of the search warrants were on their new home to ensure there was no drug use. Abuse. Neglect. Messes. Things of harmful nature. We use search warrants because they are adults, living like adults. So to respect them like adults we use search warrants. We can't just go in and look around and poke in their stuff cause we're nosy. We can do up to 10 in the first month. They sign off on it. Then the next 11 months of the year we can do 12. Then its only 1 per year after but those are welfare checks. After the first year.

So the search warrants they get a copy and are sealed. It's a way to parent them. It keeps child welfare from interfering with the foster care Because it's an unusual foster care situation and the foster care system is over loaded with real abuse cases, it takes them from having to do in home checks.

They also go to marriage counseling for 4 months.

Its quite rigid. Very boot camp.

But their home is free. Don't work a job and instead work on their home and relationship for 3 years. Then at 3 years they may work at a regular job. They dont get much cash from us. Either.

But they do get some food around holidays and birth days and anniversaries.

Its already created 10,000 jobs.

I was told by the FBI this sort of runaway situation would occur. I asked what they needed and this is basically what they said. About 4 years ago. So I said do it. They said they didn't want search warrants but something similar. I said do them as that the 1st year because it's very adult like. And hopefully they realize the 2nd year how nice it is not to have them So they keep themselves good.

So they said okay.

So realize treat your kids with respect or they have a place to go and be on their own.

I was on my own at age 2. So don't think I won't allow some 4 year old all pissed off to find a new home. Because i will.

[justholdingstill]

after showing up to the clinic today only to learn that nobody told me that i was supposed to purchase said IUD myself from the pharmacy and bring it to the appointment with me, spending $100 i hadn't budgeted for on it (and that was after it was covered 75% by my insurance, which...fucking ouch if you don't have that???), i never ended up getting the thing inserted at all because it's not the right time in my godforsaken body's stupid unpredictable cycle.

i'd be more annoyed that i took a day off work only for nothing to happen, but the gynecologist with whom i was scheduled with for the procedure was light-years better and more conpassionate than my current referring gyno in terms of actually talking to me about the procedure, the risks, and what to expect, and being genuinely concerned that i've literally never had a normal period, plus that i live with some degree of internal pain more days than i live without it. i think i might ask her if she can take me on as a patient when i go back in in 6 weeks.

it's so exhausting and rage-inducing to think that I had to go to a random walk-in clinic doctor and beg to even get that first gynecologist referral at all, after my GP had told me that there was "no apparent reason" to refer me to a specialist, despite not having been able to identify another cause for my persisent pelvic pain after extensive testing. because i was just supposed to say "oh well, it's a mystery!" and live like that indefinitely, i guess.

getting an IUD put in to (hopefully) help with the chronic pain of (strongly suspected) endometriosis at the same time as getting my meds adjusted to (hopefully) help with this (bad like it hasn't been in years) depressive episode that i can't seem to shake promises to make this an extra-special and interesting week.

i'm fucking nervous.