#i have enough to hit the 50/50 rn and it’s killing me

[electric-plants]

4.2 is going to finish downloading for me in like 20 minutes so this is me manifesting the ability to resist pulling for furina for her entire run i am strong willed and have so much self control

[itsyourstarboy]

Streamer!Honey Headcanons Pt.5

First Part

AT LONG LAST.... THE STREAMER!HONEY HEADCANONS FINALE

Note: This may be the last part, but it is not the end of Streamer!Honey!!! Just the long-winded headcanon posts. I have more planned for the future ^^ mini-fics, shitposts, all sorts of shenanigans <3

—

The punch became a meme. Honey hates it, and Guy hates that Honey hates it.

But god if it isn’t hilarious.

It took a good few months for Honey to stop beating themself up over it, and now they are able to look back on it and laugh. They even have a GIF of the moment as an alert for gifted subs.

—

Charity streams!!! Honey loves doing them. It’s fun, and for a good cause.

And, though it’s fun, sometimes it can get out of hand.

It was meant to be a joke! But, before they knew it, they hit the donation goal...

♡♡♡♡♡♡

HFDJSFEJGGFJSK

IM FREAKING OUT

CANTWAITCANTWAITCANTWAIT

I can’t believe they’re actually doing this 🤭🤭🤭

I DONT KNOW IF MY GAY LITTLE HEART WILL BE ABLE TO HANDLE IT

The sound of the door opening made chat go mostly still.

Honey, very reluctantly with an embarrassed scowl on their face, stepped into camera view.

They stood stiffly, pondering how they ended up here. Here, on stream, in front of thousands of perfect strangers...

Wearing a maid outfit.

Not even a comfortable one! It was frilly, and itchy, and the skirt was way too fucking short.

OMFGNO I FCKING CANT-

🤣🤣🤣🤣

I CANT BREATHE

OH MY GOOOOOOOD

You look so cute!!!

THIS WAS SO WORTH THE MONEY

IM WHEEZING AND I CANT FIND MY INHALERR

HSGJJFHZJAHHAHAHAH

Oh 😳😳

WHY IT LOOK KINDA GOOD THO??

[HONEY’S] TOO HOT THEY KILLED SOMEBODY

“I hate everything,” Honey muttered, as they tried to tug the dress down. It was bad enough that it was so revealing, but it also wouldn’t zip up all the way.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

It would only get worse, however, as the next goal would add thigh highs.

And the one after that would add...

SAY NYA RIGHT FUCKING NOW

AaaaawwwWWWW WHAT A CUTE KITTY

You mean “right fucking meow?”

THEY LOOK SO PISSED LMAO

SAY NYA RIGHT FUCKING MEOW

They’re gonna kill us 😭😭😭😭

IM QUEER

With what? Their wittle paws?? 😽😽

This is my phone lockscreen now

Simp

“Yeah, you all better enjoy this, ‘cause I’m never doing it again.”

Doubt it, this is the fastest we’ve ever raised money

NOOOOOOOOO

Still waiting for you to say nya

NYAAAAAANTS INGONYAMA BAGITHI BABA

ITS THE CIIIIIIIIRRRRCLE OF LIIIIIIIIIFEEE

“I’m not saying that.”

tf you’re not-

★someone donated $50★

SAY NYA BITCH

Honey heaved out a sigh that bordered a growl, and very blandly, “nya.”

As Chat cheered and went practically feral, Honey could only be glad that this couldn’t possibly get any wors-

They froze as they heard the Jaws theme start playing.

“Oh f-”

HE’S HEEEERE

YEEEEEEEESS

HoneysHeaven: wowah 😳

THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER

HOLY CRAP SOMEONE TAGGED HIM ON TWITTER 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

HoneyHeaven: hey there Honey ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

SOMEONE SNITCHED????

Honey braced their elbows on their desk and hid their face in their hands. “Go back to working.”

HoneysHeaven: I will if you promise to still be wearing that when I get home 👀👀

“I’m burning it as soon as this stream ends.”

NOO YOU CANT BURN IT YOU LOOK SO SEXYY 😩😩

The boy just wants to see you all dolled up Boo, let him have his treat

“The next 15 minutes are going to be hell.”

HoneysHeaven: oooh the next goal you put on a collar, hm? 😏😏

Guy ur killing even me rn

OH WAIT I JUST GOT GUYS USERNAME

HoneysHeaven: Honey can you send me like $70

“I am not sending you money.”

HoneysHeaven: awww cmon 🥺��� my break ends in 2 minutes I just want to see you in a collar

ITS FOR CHARITY

DONATE TO THE CAUSE

“I’ll put you in a collar,” Honey grumbled with their arms crossed tightly.

HoneysHeaven: wouldn’t be the first time 😉

HOW DO WE RAISE ANOTHER 500 IN 10 MINUTES

AYO WHAT????

—

Guy likes interrupting Honey’s streams unprompted. He loves seeing the smile on their face. The gentle one that they wear while doing what they love. It makes him want to smother them in kisses.

Sometimes when he does this, he forgets about the mask and glasses. There have been plenty of times where he’s nearly accidentally exposed his face to the world, and it gives his honey a mini heart attack each time.

Honey made the executive decision to rearrange their setup so that the door was no longer in view. That way, Guy could spontaneously enter as much as he pleased.

—

Honey was still streaming when Guy returned home from work. They had told him in advance that this stream would be dragging on a bit longer than normal.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

Honey looked up as they heard the door click open. Guy entered, waving a paper bag around.

“Honeeeey,” he sang, “I’ve brought you somethiiiiing.”

is that the boy i hear 👀👀👀

EVERYONE SHUT UP I NEED TO WITNESS THIS

DETROIT CAN WAIT THIS IS IMPORTANT

Honey eyed the bag skeptically as Guy drew closer, “should I be worried?”

“No,” Guy laughed, stopping right outside of the camera’s view. “I brought you donuts!”

“Ooh, really? What’s your motive?”

“Wha-? Motive!? Why do you think I would have a motive?”

Honey raised an eyebrow at their boyfriend and smirked.

Immensely offended, Guy scoffed, “what, am I not allowed to bring the most important person in my life a treat? Purely out of my own volition and the kindness of my heart?”

“I was joking before, but now I’m actually suspicious...”

“Just take the donuts, Honey,” Guy softly spoke with a warm smile, holding out the bag and leaning forward.

When Honey’s hand brushed against his own, Guy leaned closer, his other hand cupping the back of their neck. He held the bag up to hide his face from viewers as he placed a gentle kiss on his partners cheek.

Honey, growing ever more flustered, let out a nervous chuckle as they pushed Guy away and accepted the gifts.

AWWWWHDWSAIHDGDKDSBIDS

ITS HAPPENING

OMG

NO

DID HE KISS THEM??

WHERE IS THE CLIP I NEED TO SEE THAT AGAIN

When you’re so lonely you’re living vicariously through someone in your screen

UH YEAH THATS THE POINT

OF COURSE

I GOT THE CLIP I GOT IT

Chat wouldn’t stop talking about it for the entire rest of the stream.

And for the next 4 streams after that...

—

Chat knows that Guy is important to Honey. No other roommate of theirs has ever become such a big part of their life, everyone knows that they have to be something more.

They stopped bugging Honey about it after a year. It's just kind of common knowledge that these two have a lot of chemistry, but asking straight up about their relationship won't work.

Not that having an answer would change anything, Chat loves seeing how happy Honey is with Guy.

—

It took a little over a year for Honey to agree, but finally they are streaming a game with Guy!!

They're playing Raft. Honey in their streaming room, and Guy in the living room. They're communicating through discord, and Chat is having a blast.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

"Did you finish building that engine yet?" Honey asked, filling a chest with some items.

"No, I thought you were going to do it," Guy answered.

"I literally told you to go ahead and make one two minutes ago!"

"I was busy distracting the shark while you were scavenging all that shit underwater!"

We should get them couples counciling

Guy can't keep being shark bait ooh ah ah 😭😭

I still don't understand the point of this game

It's his destiny

Raft

raft

The point is raft

RAFT

"Honey, I think I'm dying. My hunger bar is low."

"Then eat something, we have plenty of food."

"I don't think I can make it back in time," Guy whined.

"Wh- where are you??"

You could practically hear Guy's pout, "I went back on the island because you were mad at me."

"I am not mad at you," Honey responded, exasperated, "where are you at on the island?"

"Uhmm... I'm in a place with lots of trees."

"Okay, I'm bringing you some shark meat."

"The shark is dead?"

"Yeah I killed it."

[HONEY] MOVE FASTER WE CANT LET HIM DIE

They are playing the game so wrong I am ripping my hair out

Tip: multiple sails will make you go faster

They can play however they want to 😡

The only right way to do anything is the [Honey] and Guy way

"Oh shi-" Guy started, "I'm dead."

"You're fiiine."

"No, my character just collapsed from hunger."

"Don't be dramatic, I'm almost there."

"I'm not being dramatic!! I died!!!"

"A little death never killed anybody."

Honey found Guy's character, limp on the ground, and picked him up.

"Alright, you big baby, I'll take you to the bed."

"Oooooh," Guy sang impishly, "you're carrying me to bed?"

"Yep."

"What are you gonna do with me once we get there?"

"When we get there, you are gonna build that goddamn engine!"

Upon arrival to the raft, Honey discovered something...

"Where the fuck is the bed??"

Guy coughed out a laugh, "oh, uhm- I might've taken it with me when I left."

"Why would you do that!?!?"

"Because you were mad at me!!!"

"I swear to god-" Honey dropped Guy's carcass on the raft and went to collect materials to make another bed.

"Honeeeeey," Guy whined, "this wooden floor is hard."

Honey sighed, "I'm making you a bed, hold on."

"Come lay underneath meeee."

AGDKSGAKBFK

Boi he wants them under him 👀👀

Can't believe they let Guy die, I'll never forgive them for this 😢🤧😖 /lh /j

Our boy really stepped up his flirting game 😳😳😳

Too bad [Honey] is too oblivious

They're not oblivious, they're an asshole

A distinct sound of sharp teeth chomping into their hard work caught Honey's attention.

"Fuckin' hell," they murmured, "the stupid shark is back."

"Hurry up making the bed and I can kill it," Guy offered.

"I thought you were making the bed," Honey retorted.

Guy scoffed, "Honey!!!!"

"I gotta stab the shark, hold on."

Cold blooded

Yeah

They don't deserve Guy I'm gonna kidnap him

That shark is an endangered species!!!

DoNT YOU DARE GUYNAP OUR BELOVED BOY

Finally, finally, Honey returned and placed Guy's character on the bed. He sprang up immediately.

Guy's cheerful voice started up, "yayyy, thank you Hone-" and was cut off with a yelp.

The shark had glitched through the bottom of the raft and attack Guy. It scared him half to death, but Honey?

Honey was laughing hysterically.

And it was music to Guy's ears.

Gasping for breath, they kept trying to say something, but continuously fell into a fit of giggles.

Guy was barely able to form his own words without laughing, trying to feign offense at his honey's joy in seeing him hurt. But hearing them laugh so heartily? He couldn't help but melt.

And he didn't want to just hear it, he wanted to see it.

"I'm coming to get you, Honey!" He announced, just before darting towards their room.

"No, no no!" They tried to object, but it was too late as Guy came bursting in.

They were in his arms and on the floor in an instant, tears streaming down their face as they tried to breathe.

Their face hurt from smiling, and they tried to calm down, but as soon as their breathing slowed Guy started to tickle them.

"Guy-! No!! Stop it!" They squealed and squirmed, but to no avail. Their previous laughing fit left them exhausted.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I feel like we shouldn't be watching this

HES SO CUTE????

GUY FACE REVEAL!!!!!

EVERYONE SHIELD YOUR EYES

TURN OFF YOUR DEVICES THIS IS ILLEGAL

Wait I think I've seen him before!

When all settled down, Guy and Honey were nothing but a mess of tangled limbs on the floor, just barely out of frame.

"I love you, Honey," he said softly.

Honey smiled, "I love you too."

—

When the couple realized that Guy was no longer anonymous, Honey made him start carrying pepper spray while he worked.

Gotta keep the boy safe.

The End.

A/N: Thank you for reading the Streamer!Honey series ♡ I've loved writing it, and it makes me so happy that you all loved it as well!

[beeben]

hi, i was a previous victim of ultimatehater/realultimatehater, i can go message you off anon if you wish

i have a gif aesthetic side blog and in my main blog i post media edits. i posted a gifset from each hh on my main, and reblogged some of them to my aes blog bc i have more followers there.

anyways RUH sent my over 50 death threats that i decided not to acknowledge at all. i did delete them so i have no evidence. many of them felt ai generated, just generic 'your edits are ugly, no one likes you, kill yourself' messages. nothing really outside that, i didnt receive any doxxing/rape threats

anyways i DID answer one ask, and then she proceeded to claim i somehow edited the ask???? that is literally not possible, and more concerning people believed it???

BUT ALSO before ultimatehater was deleted, if you went back enough to her blog, you can see her original url was a bunch of numbers. before getting to hazbin discourse she baited scott vs the world fans, calling them pedophiles. it seems she just wants drama and rn she's making some bold statements in her new blog, that i'll be completely honest and also is just my opinion, i think she is lying.

I feel the same thing ngl.. i don't like to discredit someone's trauma but shes been copy pasting the things she's said to me and then sending them to other people unedited. I genuinely think shes a troll, and attacking random people with fandom blogs hoping to lure in and harm a child. It seems that way from the types of media she obsesses over (hazbin hotel/helluva boss, she ra) ive never heard of scot vs the world but id guess it's probably in that same category tbh. Im really not worried about her claiming to doxx people, claiming to add people to a hit list, i dont believe it. What i do worry about is children interacting with her and thinking she is legitimate. Thats what i mean by luring children. Shes goading people into responding to her and hoping they take her seriously. Children online who watch shows like hazbin hotel (most likely with unrestricted access to the Internet) are EXACTLY the type of "im more emotionally mature than my peers" type of kid that gets pushed into these harmful and frankly predatory groomer esque situations. Even if she's a troll and this is all fake, traumatizing children isnt. She's trying to perform a power play on these kids who are just beginning to understand themes like rape or abuse or racism or brutality and care about them so emotionally as children do, and trying to use it against them. Trying to hurt them

[bonnielunkas]

okay hear me out, hurricane paranormal society dashboard simulator

actually that's a dumb idea forget i said anything

0 notes

🎮 gamerswag39

jesus fucking christ i'm so upset rn. literally got a call over NOTHING. so what if the animatonics are moving at night that doesn't mean shit man. they move at night at my location. they move at night at the pizzaplex. they moved at night in the 80's and 90's. they just do that. and then they had the nerve to get mad at me for not wanting to deal with it? like? just get a technician to deal with it if it's that big of a problem?

📞 phone-a-dude

lmao didn't they like. kill night guards in the 80's/90's

🎮 gamerswag39

yeah? jake our boss's husband literally got assaulted by mangle?

📞 phone-a-dude

yeah i remember him talking about that lmao

📞 phone-a-dude

just checked some company records my dad almost got killed by chica back in like 93 lol

🎮 gamerswag39

didn't your dad literally kill those kids?

📞 phone-a-dude

lmfao yeah

💙 stanleyblogs

238 notes

⚙ exo-gurl

Alright, today's the day guys, gonna be showing off the exosuit in my robotics class. (Made it with a bit of help from @ history-with-shelly but no one in my class needs to know that. Thanks btw Shelly, you're a real one.)

⚙ exo-gurl

I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD I'M GONNA KILL REED STRAIGHT UP TOMORROW. IT IS ON. SIGHT. THEY ARE SO DEAD.

⚙ exo-gurl

HEY SO GUESS WHO HAS A BUNCH OF BROKEN BONES AND DIDN'T KNOW UNTIL AFTER GETTING INTO A REALLY NASTY FIGHT

🖥 coding-and-cats

you're welcome 👍

⚙ exo-gurl

YOU ARE LITERALLY THE REASON THEY'RE BROKEN IN THE FIRST PLACE. DIE.

749 notes

🌀 tgirl-sonic-the-hedgehog

Me and my gf are going on a date later hopefully nothing weird or paranormal happens!

🌀 tgirl-sonic-the-hedgehog

Hey what the fuck is Faz-goo and why is this random kid I don't know warning me about it.

1,253 notes

🔧 cob-rulez

not to name names, but istg i'm this close to dropping one of my friends. he literally went like, 50 in a school zone, almost ran over tobes' boyfriend, and he didn't even fucking apologize? he just kept driving like that didn't happen? like? wtf?

(pete when you see this i'm really sorry my friend almost hit you)

🏈 absolutely-footballin

YOU WERE IN THAT TRUCK TOO????

🔧 cob-rulez

yes unfortunately.

💛 aimees-corner

And this is why I've been telling you to drop him for the last few years.

🔧 cob-rulez

in my defense i haven't been in a truck with him before i thought everyone was just like, exaggerating when they said he's a terrible driver

💛 aimees-corner

Need we forget all the times he's ended up on the news? Enough to where there's a whole post about it?

🛻 trucks-n-shit

gang i'm like, RIGHT HERE.

🌐 certified-hurricane-moment

Certified Hurricane Moments in history

🔧 cob-rulez

HELLO?

13,572 notes

🧃 applesauceboy

Okay so I kinda always figured? I was adopted? Since me and my parents don't look alike at all. But WHAT DO YOU MEAN I HAVE AN OLDER BROTHER I JUST NEVER KNEW ABOUT? I'm hanging out with him right now and like? How did we just never know?

🧃 applesauceboy

His name is Devon btw if like, any of you guys know him.

📓 kaiju-fanboy

I work with him, I guess? He joined the paranormal team I'm in because he accidentally killed a classmate once.

🧃 applesauceboy

HUH?

OZ YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THAT LIKE IT'S A NORMAL THING?

👾 gregorygaming

oh yeah I know him too lol. apparently he went to that abandoned freddy's out in the woods with his friend and said classmate and the classmate put on a springlock suit and bled out? but then devon went back a week later and his classmate was there and they were fine and then everyone just moved on like nothing happened.

🧃 applesauceboy

WHAT

🧃 applesauceboy

NO WAY YOU GUYS ARE BEING FOR REAL I'M GONNA ASK HIM.

🧃 applesauceboy

WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE ACTUALLY DID THAT SHIT?

136 notes

🦊 yargfoxyforever

hey guys what does it mean if my cousin has blue eyes and his name is freddy and he's really nice

💖 m4rl3y

Alec please stop borderline shit-talking my younger brother I really don't see what the issue is

🦊 yargfoxyforever

chat, Does She Know?

💖 m4rl3y

Alec what does that mean

💖 m4rl3y

Alec

14 notes

🐻 mnm-fazbear-facts

Hey guys, Mandy here with some exciting news!!!! I'm gonna be visiting Utah next week to see my friends!!!! I'll let you guys know if I can learn any cool info on this trip!!! See you guys in a week!!!! ^v^

🐻 mnm-fazbear-facts

Guys I think I'm being haunted.

102 notes

🧢 thegreendemon

WHO TOLD MY BROTHER ABOUT KELSEY

🧢 thegreendemon

@ kaiju-fanboy @ gregorygaming YOU TWO.

46 notes

🌹 heather-the-musical

This close to kicking this random blonde dude out of Film Club, he's annoying when it comes to directing and he can't use a camera to save his life.

🌹 heather-the-musical

No fucking way he just showed me literal footage of a Freddy's just to prove he's a good camera man. What the fuck.

🌹 heather-the-musical

IS THAT A GHOST?

263 notes

💀 tomb-and-gloom

like this post if you love yuri

5,048 notes

🍀 sir-gee-oh

stuck on a phone call with matt. ignoring him isn't enough i need to kill this guy.

[gynandromorph]

anyway honor mode-wise I still haven't hit level 11. nothing majorly close to a tpk but I've been getting maybe a little tiny bit too cocky. I haven't been casting aud and bonus hp spells as reliably as I shojld. I tried picking up the concussion grenades in the audience hall as one does and it turns out in honor mode they just fucking explode if you try to touch should. did this twice on turn one before understanding and it wiped out like 40-50 hp on every party member. 2 of them downed before i could just walk backwards out the door for a take 2. on the flip side I did acquire the runepowder bomb from the iron hands. made ethel unvore the child but i could still go kill her. counselor florrick almost straight up attacked me in the streets for saving her ass because I freed wyll while sacrificing his father in the process. I tried to save him but the guy who activates the ability to even go to the Iron throne glitched out and wouldn't speak to me. he just kept telling me I'd tormented him enough and to leave. so I grabbed the code myself and just blew up the foundry without saving Duke ravengard or fighting anyone. I did try tho. I got to keep the runepowder bomb that way. in addition to the barrels. gortash is the least threatening fight in front of me that isn't a pain in the ass to get to rn. orin kidnapped gale. and uuuuhh that's about it for tonight. I respec'd multiple characters into having the alert feat again because I'm a stupid bitch full of hubris. I think I should go harvest xp from some of the guild/stone lord plot, their fights were also Not Particularly Scary

[companionwolf]

tonight's delta green recap:

- grab the weird photos and fucking GO

- Jay being careful and efficient w the previous point while Jacob goes FUCK FUCK FUCK * tears them off the pins + shove them in pocket* is so. Correct it makes me want to bite (positively)

- this night at the opera interrupted by Wolfs Soup Time: The Soupening (I forgot to eat until now AGAIN yeehaw)

- if Jacob and Jay have to jump out of a window tonight I-- wait the fall damage is A LOT what the shit . I mean it makes sense but DAMN

- they're trying the downstairs window and . Jacob. Jacob. I said ROLL LOWER yesterday. Apparently you didn't listen -_-

-

- however. that would be very IC of him.

- JACOB CAN YOU ROLL LOW FOR THINGS THAT ACTUALLY MATTER (he just failed the Athletics roll -_-)

- lethality 2% ( 1 or 2 = dead) ... BUT HES NOT I GOT A 3 AND A 50. HE JUST. IS UNCONSCIOUS. YAAAY.

-

Honestly my handler nails him here. This is so in character it makes me lol.

- oh Jesus he has 3/13 hp rn . Jacob.

- operation ambush the cops is now underway, please hold for resolution

- me for literally 15 min just now trying to make a tactical decision re Jay's turn:

-

This sounds bad but I'm having fun! ^_^

- no context but MY HANLDER REMAINS THE BEST HANDLER

- COP 1 HAS BEEN SHOT IN THE FACE BY JOY LETS FUCKING [DABS] GO

- handler has deemed cops are not innocents and therefore we don't have to SAN roll unless we kill them (:

- shoutout to cop 1 for having a gunshot wound to the face but still barely missing shooting Jay in the head while also in the fucking dark

- JAY RUSHES OFFICER 2 #YOLO. Also they said 'hell' which is a big thing for them. They don’t usually swear.

- cop 2 rolls to fight back and loses; he is scratched by Jay and not really hurt at all but. at least he lost fight back?

- JEAN FIRST AID ROLLED AND MAX HEALED; JACOB IS .. [I push his slowly waking consciousness back under. He will not be helpful right now. I pat his head affectionately.]

- JAY HAS BEEN SHOT.

- JAY HAS SAID A 2ND SWEAR WORD.

- JEAN THREW A FUCKING HAMMER AT COP 1 AND KILLED HIM IM --

-

- OH SHIT THEY HIT AND ROLLED MAX DAMAGE; COPS ALIVE BUT HURT BAD

- JOY SHOT ABOVE COP IN THE FACE AND HES FUCKING DEAD NOW

- combat over; 2 hrs 20 mins. please GOD can we have some guns now.

-

- I can just imagine the group going back to Sunday like 'so here's what happened' and he just goes [SIGH]

- going to Jean's motel to do surgical things (they have relevant background)

- so because Jay's Thing(TM) is Forensics, they know they a) all left enough blood to get checked against by records b) either they have 2 weeks or 48 hours and c) they are on record; they don't know about everyone else

- does it count if Jay says the fuck word but it's just them using someone else's words? unsure wolf is unsure but lol'ing

- surgery time for Jay! Then the woman they found at the apartment & Jacob.

- surgery success from Jean; Jay is at 12/13 health & the apartment woman is also like. Better now. Jacob's turn.

- surgery roll from Jean for Jacob succeds as well, yaaaayyyy

-

- eepy time for Jay and also wolves. bye

[omanu]

useless words by me

happy new year to those who celebrate. i have some kind of cyst right on top of my butt crack and its been painful. cant sleep or sit well and ive been taking antibiotics since the 30th and on the 31st to today it popped on it's own, during new years lmfao. i was supposed to have gone to a friend of a friend's house to celebrate this shit of new year, i didn't really want to go in the first place, i hate commemorating things, but there was going to be a kareoke machine so i was convinced. didnt actually end up going cuz the cyst had gotten worse, i was glad i didnt go pw otherwise id have dirty underwear until the morning (today) and it's just gross as fuck. i wasnt on the mood bc its sucks to be on antibiotics. so instead of going w my friends i stayed with my mom and cousins at my cousin's. it was fine and chill i ate a fucking lot. i prepared a chocolate mousse and it kinda flopped but it was good. imxlxkk im just kind of in my feelings cuz at some point my 15yo cousin started talking shit abt elvis probably bc to get a reaction out of me, and it did, but i was being sarcastic most of the time and just kinda dealing w it in a joking manner but she felt so righteous so i started pointing out the hypocrisy in her taste cnjccj idk why i care, i just like him so much, so it sucks, simply as that. and it's all a bunch of lies like xjdjdk i cant even say much, everything about him that ppl complain is only based on some takes that are not true at all. i understand not liking him for priscilla but like,, the woman herself loves him still, and the anachronism is unreasonable. other than that, putting the industry's blame on him just doesnt work, he was literally just a guy. he could have been a better person in terms of social justice but this applies to all fucking celebrities TO THIS DAY so like,, whats the point of getting mad at him specifically??? weird. ik it doesnt matter if you dont care about him but i like him a lot so im gonna feel bad for all of this misdirected criticism.

so, my night ended on an uncomfortable note bc of this shit + i was feeling sorry for my cyst situation and how i spent the last three months sick and im still gonna be sick for a while – different sicknesses since october and i still dont know if im well enough – and im worried about the next few months cuz im unemployed rn and i need money to see my j-hope and taemin as well and i lent money to my sister while she didnt deserve it and i need to keep filling my schedule w classes and courses to get my degree by the end of this year and i didnt want to go through it while working but i guess that's what i'll have to do to see my king hoseok. and with all the low self-esteem that the end year parties bring as usual, im feeling terrible about my own self so yeah it checks out, the usual new year sentiment. amazing.

anyways, for all of this,, with all of this, it made me realize that i wish i had someone to talk about elvis and my feelings about some stuff cuz it only matters to me and to someone whose validation on me would make me feel comfortable since they know me and have the same standards as me. im feeling sorry for myself for losing the only person that had my heart and brain and ears, it really sucks, you guys. i have been lonely ever since and it only hurts me. nobody knows me. it's my fault but not only mine. wish i had someone. that's all i wish.

and i think 2025 is gonna be worse but im gonna try a bunch of things to make me overcome my state i need to get out of here and live the lonely bearable life i envisioned for myself until i kill myself when i hit like 40-50. sounds about ok.

[dndidgaf]

I never get asks, so i'm just gonna answer them all. Wall of text, my answers under the cut

PLAYER

Race: I don't think that I've ever played a common race before. I default to uncommon/homebrew races for better roleplay.

Class: Rogue....... Maybe Artificer.

Playtest: I'm going into a new campaign, and I can't wait to try out the Chaneler class (I definitely spelled that wrong). I can't remember who it's by.

Party Comp: Sometimes. If my party is really tanky and gets themselves on the brink of death a lot, I might consider being a Cleric or Bard. On the other hand, if my party is mostly spellcasters, I might take on the role of tank. In both cases, I only do it in drastic situations. My usual character is an ambush, stealthy, works behind the scenes kind of character. Level One: I heard about it through friends and we make a group. They really helped me out in making a character, and it was a fun first session. Horrible character build and usage on my part though. Skill: I'm good at roleplay and combat, although I find combat more fun. I guess I would say that my specialty is teamwork. I look at my party's strengths and weaknesses and work around and with them. I also usually work better with smaller groups. I do add flair into combat though, like that time I sliced that priest in half and peeled him like a banana.

Scheduling: Long campaigns, by far. Oneshots are fun, but the angst that comes with longer campaigns takes the cake.

Feat: I roll my dice until they hit a low number, preferably under 5. I then keep that die untouched until I need to roll something important, then use the die. Rolls high every time. I always forget to do it though.

Nat 20: My friend AJ (player) rolled a 27 (19 + 8) on a deception check trying to convince an NPC that they don't exist. Charlie (the character) went invisible and all proof of their existence was wiped from the face of the earth. NPCs and PCs alike had no memory of Charlie. Charlie stayed non-existent for the rest of the session until at a critical battle, where they scored a crit against the enemy (not quite the big bad, but close) and was the reason we won the fight.

Initiative: In my next campaign (I'm the DM), I've planted a traitor. This traitor is going to kill a child. I can't wait to roleplay the child being killed by her role model, who is a scummy, greasy, rat man. I can't wait to kill my players' hearts.

Crit Fail: Somehow, no. I've come close, but I've never had a character death.

Diamond: No resurrection. My party's character deaths have all been before anyone had access to the Revivify spell. After that, we could handle ourselves enough that we didn't need it.

Backup: I have a binder full of cool characters that could fit into any situation, but I usually have at least 3 backup characters specifically for one campaign. Don't judge, I get bored easily.

Dungeon Court: Back when I was a kid, my dad tried to run a dnd game with the rest of the immediate family, which consisted of my mom, me, and my brother. Thing is, my dad didn't know anything about how DnD works, and he was drunk and high. That was not a fun game.

Dice: I have a horrible dice curse. Any dice that I touch or are on my person for more than 10 minutes doesn't roll higher than a 10. Expensive dice tend to roll better. Once I get a new set, I immediately hold it over a candle and chant "Natural Twenty" for 10 minutes while the candle is surrounded by crystals and flowers. After this, I leave it on the Dice Altar, highest side up, for a week. This usually rids it of it's curse temporarily. For a typical set, I have to renew it every month. Considering that I'm a dice goblin and that I own over 50 sets (I can't afford more :')) , I set aside a day to purify all my dice sets and rotate them on the altar.

DUNGEON MASTER

Leveling: I start my party at 3-5, depending on experience. I use milestones; it's good motivation to stay on the plot. I'm DMing for 7th level players rn.

Prep: I get the bare bones of the story all written out, then just improvise and wing it. It goes better that way. Less DM Depression.

Screen: Character sheets of PCs and NPCs, dice, laptop for homebrew, and speakers for ambiance and music.

TPK: Yes, unfortunately. I decided to let all characters come back as reborn, which saved the party, kept some continuity, and added some good roleplay.

Session Zero: I usually ask players for two flaws and one secret. This keeps things interesting, as I can exploit these. It makes inspiration easier to give. I also love horror campaigns, so I usually ask players what their boundaries or triggers are. I want my players to have fun, so I do what I can to make that happen.

Homebrew: I love making magic items or finding them on tumblr. I use a lot of the stuff people put out. I also have an initiative system where players in blocks of five (1-5, 6-10, 11-15, 16-20, 20-25, you get the jist) take their turns together. It makes combat more fun and dynamic.

CHARACTER

My character's name is Doodle. He is a warforged rogue that escaped from a facility known as A.R.G.O. He was never told what the acronym means. He wears a red scarf and a beige handkerchief over his right eye from a past injury.

Background: He usually uses his time on self-maintenance. Tighten loose screws, fix oil leaks, adjust lenses, buff or replace plating. After an accident with his lens caused it to give him shattered vision and migraines for about two months, he's not taking the chances again. He also loves talking to another PC named Charlie (same one as before)

Vibe: Doodle is the polite one of the group. In social interactions, he ends up becoming a voice of reason. He has anger issues though, and he tries to conceal them, but his only coping mechanism is killing. He was made for it, after all. Our party doesn't discuss dynamics, but I wish we did.

Downtime: We don't get much downtime in game. We usually hop from one adventure to the next, trying to stop the big bad as fast as possible. In his few spare moments, he meditates to calm his anger. Sometimes this doesn't work very well though, so he has to resort to... other means.

Secret: For context, Doodle was kidnapped by the big bad and a clone replaced him. Doodle was tortured, and it scarred him for life. He is merciless in battle, like he is trying to pay back the pain that was inflicted on him. Anger is replacing is fear, and he disgusts himself. Doodle acts nonchalant, but he is secretly resentful that his party members didn't notice and left him to be tortured for weeks.

Heart: He hopes for a better life. One where he doesn't have to fight. That faint linger of hope is what keeps him going. This is easily used against him, though.

End: His perfect ending would be to defeat the ARGO company, settle down, and find family. He is aro/ace, so he isn't interested in marriage or children, but he still loves the idea of spending time with his friend's children.

If you've gotten this far, thanks for reading! It means a lot

d&d player asks

FOR THE PLAYER

Race: What's your favorite race to play? Is there a race you default to or play more often?

Class: What's your favorite class to play?

Playtest: What class (or subclass) do you want to try out?

Party Comp: Do you think about party composition while building a character? What role do you usually fill in your party, if any?

Level One: What was your first experience with D&D? How did you hear about it? What was your first game like?

Skill: Do you prefer RP, combat, or something else? Is there a part of the game you consider yourself best at?

Scheduling: Do you prefer to play in long campaigns, oneshots, or something in between?

Feat: What's one habit, trick, tip, etc. you picked up from another player?

Nat 20: What's the most memorable RP scene you've been a part of?

Initiative: What's an RP scene you're looking forward to playing?

Crit Fail: Have you ever had a character death? What happened?

Diamond: Have you ever participated in a character resurrection (for your own character or someone at the table)? What happened?

Backup: Do you design backup characters? What's your process? Have you ever had to use one?

Dungeon Court: What's the worst D&D experience you've ever had?

Dice: Do you have any dice rituals? Preferences? Collections? Does such thing as dice luck really exist?

FOR THE DM

Leveling: What's your ideal starting party level? What leveling system do you use? What level are your currently (or did you most recently) DMing for?

Prep: How much prep work do you do? How far out do you prep?

Screen: What do you usually keep behind your DM screen?

TPK: Have you ever had a game go completely off the rails? TPK? How did you adjust?

Session Zero: Is there anything specific you ask your players to have before you start playing (e.g. a secret about their character, a backstory event, etc.)?

Homebrew: Do you have any table rules or homebrews you use? What are they?

FOR THE CHARACTER (A/N: You may want to specify a character for these!)

Background: Does your PC get up to anything that you don't narrate often? Any background habits, activities, plots? Do you share these through other avenues (e.g. a group chat, table cross-talk, posting online)?

Vibe: How does your character get along with the party? Does your group talk about party dynamics outside the game?

Downtime: What does your character do in their downtime? How do you bring this up during gameplay?

Secret: Is there anything that you know about your character but your character doesn't know? What is it? How did you come up with this secret?

Heart: What drives your character? Do they have a theme, question, mission, etc. that they're holding onto? How did you pick it for them?

End: What's the ideal ending for your character's story and the game? Are these the same, or different?

[athenamikaelson]

I'm wildin with this one rn. It's okay if you don't want to write it! Klaus Mikaelson x reader who can't get hurt (if that makes sense??) The Mikaelsons get kidnapped, reader comes for them and gets stabbed pretty badly but they just go "I mean that's fair." and keep going and later at night they're all just trying to process and Klaus spends the night with them asking a million questions?

Klaus Mikaelson x Reader

Request- I'm wildin with this one rn. It's okay if you don't want to write it! Klaus Mikaelson x reader who can't get hurt (if that makes sense??) The Mikaelsons get kidnapped, reader comes for them and gets stabbed pretty badly but they just go "I mean that's fair." and keep going and later at night they're all just trying to process and Klaus spends the night with them asking a million questions?

 Warnings- Kol being a dumbass, swearing, blood.

Word Count- 1,342

Walking into the witch’s quarter I’m surrounded by tombstones and mausoleums. Looking at my phone again to see if Nik had responded to any of my texts or call. Nothing. Great.

Not that Nik, or any of the other Mikaleon’s would answer giving the fact that the witches had something to do with their disappearance. 

When I had first realized they were all missing I had tried calling all of them, even Kol who doesn’t even know how to use his phone. That’s how desperate I was. When I couldn’t find where they went I did a location spell that led me here. As Nik says, “Dead or alive witches are a pain in my ass.” He would always look at me after he said it though and tell me I was an exception. Not that I always believed him though. I know I’m a pain in his ass. But for some reason he still loves me. That really doesn’t help my god complex.

Walking through the rows of graves I try to close in my hearing to notice anything out of the ordinary. I am in a graveyard so that doesn’t really help. I continue walking for what feels like hours, when in reality it’s probably been like 5 minutes. Goddamn I hate exercise, Nik is lucky I like him. 

“To our ancestors we pray, please take this sacrifice and give us the strength to defeat our enemies!” I hear coming around the corner of an old grave which must’ve been over 100 years old. I peak around the grave, which just touching it gives me the creeps. Not to my surprise I see a group of maybe 7 witches surrounding an altar. Fucking extremists. Why can’t they find a different hobby other than sacrificial murders? What did catch me by surprise though was the whole of the Mikaelson gang chained up against the walls. Jesus Christ that’s impressive. I mean chaining up ALL of the Mikealson clan. That takes some balls. 

“You know darling, if you’d just unchain me now I’ll consider not ripping your spine out and strangling you.” Kol’s voice broke the silence. I visually roll my eyes. Classic Kol.

The witch who seems to be around mid 50’s, the eldest of the group I presume, walks up to Kol and puts what appears to be a necklace with a ruby like gem on the end, in Kol’s face. 

“As long as I have this gem darling, you and your bastard family aren’t going anywhere.” The witch mockingly says. Which earns a growl and pulling his chains from Kol. 

“This is ridiculous, you psychotic witches. Unchain us now or I swear to-” Nik yells at the witch. 

“You’ll what? What will you do Niklaus. You’ll yell? Pull on those chains? Tell me, what will the bastard child do?” That bitch snarckingly says. Oh I know that bitch didn’t just say what I thought she said. Ok I’m killing this bitch. I can’t take on 7 witches by myself though. I need my man. I just need to get that damn necklace from that old bag. Shouldn’t be hard enough. 

I walk behind the columns to the other side where Nik and his family are chained up. 

“Hey babe.” I whisper to Nik. Nik whips his head around and his eyes visibly widen when he notices me so I just send him a big smile. 

“Y/N? What the bloody hell-” Nik is about to question me before I press my finger to stop him from talking and press my other finger to my lips to signal to him to shut up. 

“I’m saving the day.” I smile as I walk out of the shadows to the old witch. Múltiple, “Y/N?”’s come from the Mikaelsons while just a laugh comes from Kol.

Oh shit I didn’t bring a weapon. I look around quickly before I see Bekah kick a large metal poker at me. Picking it up and sending her a smile I walk up behind the bitchy witch. 

“I know you didn’t call my boyfriend a bastard, you whore.” Before she can fully turn around I whip the poker at her and hit her in the face, knocking her down. Which unfortunately gets the attention of the other witches. I quickly rip the necklace of her neck and freeze. 

“Fuck. What do I do with this?” 

“Break it love. Bloody hell do I have to do everything?” 

“Shut it Kol, also.. thanks.” I throw the necklace on the ground and stomp my foot on it, breaking it into pieces. 

In a second all the Mikaelsons rip off their chains. The younger witches all freeze, scared expressions on their faces. Ha. I’m about to turn and hug Nik who starts to walk my way before I feel something hit my stomach. I feel a sudden pain and my shirt starts to dampen. I reach my hand down and pull it back to see it covered in blood. I look up to see Nik looking at my stomach before he looks at me, frozen. 

“Well I guess that’s fair.” Everything goes black.

I woke up surrounded by darkness. I try to get my eyes to relax to my surroundings but nothing happens. My mind is foggy until I remember the blood. I reach down to see that I’m in one of Nik’s shirts. I pull it up to look at my stomach, which is covered in dried blood. But no wounds. I throw my legs over the bed and walk towards the door. Light bombards my eyes as I peer down the hallway. I can hear voices coming from the dining hall as I make my way down there.

Nik and his family are all sitting in different areas drinking red liquids. Which doesn’t take a genius to figure out what that was.

“Hello Mikaelsons, I LIVED!” I make myself present to the vamps. Elijah and Nik both stand up and look at me worriedly, while Rebekah sat there with a questionable look and Kol was sitting smirking in the corner. 

“Y/n, you must still be tired and sore. I believe it would be best if you went back to sleep.” Elijah tried to reason with me as he started to walk towards me. I quickly stopped him with a raise of my hand. 

“Eli I’m fine. I am doing good. Walking and shit, you know. I’m feeling fire.” I walk past Eli and sit down next to Bekah which gets me a smile thrown at me and a disapproving look from Elijah as he comes to sit down back in his seat. Nik just stands in the same spot looking me over. His eyes held longer on my stomach where my wound was. 

“Y/n, come with me please.” Nik starts to walk upstairs before I can object.

When I make it up to our shared bedroom I barely have a second before Nik’s arms wrap around me surrounding me in a hug. 

“You scared me.” His eyes come to meet mine, I nearly break down when I see tears breaching the edges of his eyes.

“Hey, I’m fine now baby. I’m ok.” I reach up to brush away the tears threatening to fall onto his cheeks. 

“When I saw you fall to the floor I thought my world would end right there.” I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss his nose.

“You really think you can get rid of me that quickly?” A hurt look crosses NIk’s face after I say that. 

“How could you even joke like that? I mean you alway make these jokes after bad things happen? God you’re so much like Kol. And the thing you said when you got stabbed! Most people would scream or cry. You just made a sarcastic comment.”

“I don’t know man. I’m built differently I guess.” I quickly press a kiss to his lips which he quickly returns before I pull away. Confusion crosses his face. 

‘Don’t. Ever. Tell. Me. I’m like Kol.”

[gwoongi]

wordless pt.1

jeon jeongguk / reader genre: hitman (john wick?) au, sugar daddy au, fluff, pining, angst rating: mature words: 4.1k warnings: mentions of blood and violence, unconventional relationship, angsty themes, smoking mention a/n: this is jeongguk as john wick because i’m trash and i cant finish one story at a time. these prompts r from here btw :) im gonna do all 50 but im too lazy rn so here’s the first 10 :D

Sometimes, saying “I love you” is inappropriate, and given your circumstances, you think it might send Jeongguk over the edge if he hears them again.

Parts: One, Two, Three, Four, Five

Now, it definitely was not a stretch to assume that everything in Jeongguk’s life was indeed unconventional. People didn’t need to understand that what Jeongguk did for work was something that, by the law, was considered unprofessional and inhumane, and so when asked, Jeongguk sufficed for “boss of a company”, and questions weren’t asked. If they were, Jeongguk came up with a slightly more conventional lie, to make up for the reality that was Jeongguk working on the clock, killing nobodies for a bit of cash.

Taehyung, his right-hand man, had expressed how unconventional Jeongguk seemed to be over a dinner in Venice, a little restaurant tucked away unconventionally in a street that did not belong to America. Jeongguk spoke four languages comfortably, and had parents retiring in the Canary Islands. Jeongguk donated money to women’s charities and mental health services, and helped bribe his cousins into Ivy Leagues when racism prevented them from entry. Jeongguk was a Joe-Exotic in the making and owned a rescue black panther named Elio, and had houses across the globe for use when working. And, Jeongguk was dipping his toes into playing house with a sugar baby who was only five years younger than him, of whom he had met in a stakeout which involved the hit being on your brother’s head. Unconventionally, you led him to his target, and afterwards, dined with him in a Thai restaurant.

Things in Jeongguk’s life were far from ordinary, but perhaps it was the denial of mundane comforts that kept Jeongguk going. If he went back to normality, to working a shitty customer service job like when he was seventeen, dumping trash into overflowing piles behind the off-license he worked at, things wouldn’t be the same. Jeongguk would feel alien, like he didn’t belong. At least here, amongst the pain and the bullets and the years worth of trauma packed in his wrinkles (which, yes, if he looks hard enough, he can see some cursing his twenty five year old skin), Jeongguk felt like he sort of belonged. In an unconventional way.

Having met Jeongguk during his line of work, there were difficulties in being Jeongguk’s sugar baby. For one, he always felt guilty for having murdered your brother, even though you heavily supported the hit. Your brother was a jerk, a bully with money, someone who had wronged your entire family, turned off your younger sister’s life support when there was a chance of her survival. Asshole, he deserved it. Secondly, Jeongguk was impractical and irrational and often acted selfishly, meaning he was often out of the country on work, only available in whispers for a few hours and then he was gone, compensating with a few sums of cash.

He tried his best. Jeongguk, despite technicalities including his work and his past and his occasional mean streak, genuinely cared about other people. When he could, he made the effort, otherwise not attempting to make promises to you that he could not keep. Jeongguk knows that he got really lucky when he found you. You didn’t ask questions. Nobody was better for him.

However, Jeongguk was selfish, and broken, and in refusal of fixing what was wrong with him. When it was of convenience, Jeongguk drew comparisons to the last girlfriend he tried to entertain. One who wronged him, and died when he tried to repair everything she had destroyed. Jeongguk carries that with him like the tattoos on his skin, a permanent memory, and something that often disturbs what could be and should be between the both of you.

Jeongguk is worthy of love, and capable of loving. On days where Jeongguk is free to lounge without the guilt of not working, you find it is so easy to love him. But, it can’t be that way. You couldn’t just tell him that. Telling him that you loved him would be inappropriately unconventional. Sometimes, saying “I love you” is inappropriate, and given your circumstances, you think it might send Jeongguk over the edge if he hears it again.

(1) Holding their hands when they are shaking.

Jeongguk is in his living room, his right leg bouncing like a spring as he cradles an infant glass of whiskey. His eyes are glazed, yet wide, staring at the Seoul city draped in darkness and neon, and without even looking inside, you know that his brain is spinning, thoughts chaotic and loud.

“Hey,” you call out to him, and his eyes stutter to the left to catch you in the doorway, “I heard you get up. What’s wrong?”

Jeongguk shakes his head gently. “Nothing, baby, go back to bed. I’ll be up in a minute.”

Jeongguk often makes comments without expectancies. You stand in the doorway that connects the living room to the long hall that stems into bedrooms and bathrooms, and watch him for a moment. His whole body vibrates like a speaker, his hands trembling as the glass drains and he reaches for a second, or a third, or maybe a tenth. You want to sigh, without being patronising, but you know that any sign of sympathy is mistaken for that whenever Jeongguk is around to make the judgement.

He looks back to the skyline and frowns, his attention panning from the window to his phone that buzzes blue, but he ignores. Stepping across the cool wooden floorboards, you approach him sleepily and take a seat next to him on the sofa. Neither of you move, but he recognises you’ve moved. He bristles slightly, like it was unexpected.

“You can take your time,” you suggest to him, and his hands ache in his lap as he sets the glass down on the coffee table with a careless thud. He scoffs, devoid of emotion, and dips his head so his chin is near his collarbones. In his lap, those hands shake. “Maybe don’t drink so much tonight.”

“I’m clearing my head,” he insists weakly. Those hands still shake.

Brows creased with a pinch, you swallow the unease and reach for his hands. Jeongguk doesn’t say anything as you do so, enveloping his hands in yours, and so suddenly the shaking ceases. Like trying to block the shakes from reaching his wrists, your hands keep his safe.

“I know,” you understand honestly, because you do know what he’s going through. “How about tea, or something? To calm down, calm down the mess that’s up in there.”

Your chin is on his shoulder, and he smiles softly. “Are you calling me messy?”

“Nah, I’m calling your brain messy,” you reply. “It’s a cruel fucking brain.”

“Hate my brain.”

“Today, we hate it.”

Jeongguk’s head turns slightly so that he can see you, and in his lap, his thumbs brush across your skin.

“Thank you,” Jeongguk says quietly, attempting a smile that doesn’t quite convince. It doesn’t necessarily have to, not tonight anyway. His phone continues to flash like a light show, Taehyung’s name in bold. “Fuck. I’ll take the call, and then I’ll come back to bed, okay?”

You nod, “Mm, okay. Want me to make a drink?”

“I don’t need it,” Jeongguk concludes. “Not today.”

(2) Tucking the sheets around them when they stir during the night.

Sometimes Jeongguk wakes up in the night due to nightmares, but tonight, it’s different.

Beside him, you stir uncomfortably and kick his leg for the fourth time. He huffs and looks over, trying to figure out if you’re awake and indignant, or lost in the dream. He settles on the latter when you strain out the name of your brother and his heart swoops with a dull ache.

“You’re just dreaming, baby, come on,” Jeongguk mutters quietly into your ear, holding you in place to calm the thrashing. “He’s not here anymore, I’m here. Y/N.”

It subsides after a few minutes, making it the longest you’ve gone on record. He looks into your sleepy, upset eyes as you break awake and brushes the hair out of your face. He tries to smile for you, and maybe you can’t see in the dark.

“I’ll get you some water,” Jeongguk suggests gently. “Hm? Sweet thing. It’s just a dream.” He says this into your hair in a hug, leaving a kiss on your temple as he breaks. “You’re fine.”

“I’m fine,” you breathe uneasily, and he separates to get a glass of water and returns to find you sleeping again. What relief Jeongguk might have is exhaled as he sets the glass on the bedside table, stroking your hair until he moves away with the sudden realisation that this is not a normal exchange.

Before Jeongguk decides to leave again, he makes sure the bed is made and that you are safe; he tucks the duvet in tightly and presses a kiss to your forehead before grabbing his coat by the front door and leaving your apartment, one tucked in the city so far that Jeongguk finds it a hassle to visit.

(3) Travelling long distances just to see them.

For three days now, you have been in Colmar, and Jeongguk is beginning to feel lonely. It had been his idea to send you away, when the heat on his long, long fued with a rival colleague threatened your safety. In return, you got a new apartment that Taehyung had found closer to Jeongguk’s own when your address got leaked, and Colmar could be considered a vacation if you pretended for long enough.

With tensions cool and the coast somewhat clear, Jeongguk picks the skin around his fingernails as a distraction before deciding that enough was enough. He missed you, and missed how you were always around for him when he needed you most. This is what drives him to jumping on a plane in his company’s name, and flying to France.

A small boat passes underneath the bridge you are standing on, and your hands dig into the barrier as you arch to smile at the tourists beneath. One catches a glimpse of your denim skirt and cherry print blouse in the sunshine and extends his hat with a wave, and you wave back. France is nothing like Seoul, and is indeed warm and fruitful and unique. The sun is hot, the sky is clear, and the streets are filled with an atmospheric buzz of friendliness, the smell of coffee and some food you don’t know yet entrapping your senses.

“Madame, je peux vous prendre en photo?”

Hearing the voice, you turn your body left and prepare to face the tourist, but instead you are welcomed with the sight of Jeongguk dressed in black, sunglasses sliding down his nose with a smile. He does hold a camera in his hands, although teasingly.

“Oui,” you quip, posing cutely and Jeongguk takes a photograph anyway, to humour the moment, to print when he gets back to Seoul. You join his laughter as he peers at the photograph and he walks without looking up towards you.

“When did you get here?” you ask him, a round of laughter from the little boat making you turn to stare at them with a giggle.

“Bout an hour ago,” Jeongguk replies, and he shuts off the camera and puts it in his coat pocket. It’s only a small camera, probably cost him a crumb to buy from a vintage store. He meets your eyes with a comfortable smile and rounds in, pressing your lower back against the bridge barrier and circling your arms around you. Carefully, then, he kisses you, tasting the suncream on your skin as his lips wander from yours to the skin around your face.

“Miss me?”

“Terribly,” Jeongguk responds. “I am so bored when you’re not around. You always have something to do, always have something to say.”

You hum in response. “I’m glad I’m of some entertainment for you.”

“Oh, for sure,” agrees Jeongguk. “I don’t think I’ve used my brain so often when I’m away from work as much as I do when I’m with you. Did you know that you’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met?”

“Wow,” you exclaim with a smile. “Hire me.”

“Ha!” he remarks, kissing you again and taking your hand in his. He moves, back in the way you came. “Over my dead body.”

(4) Making their favorite meal when they are having a hard day.

“You.”

“Not now, Y/N, I’m working,” Jeongguk replies non committedly. He fists his hair.

“Not up for discussion right now,” you huff, and he has the nerve to glare at you which only makes you uncomfortably angry. “You haven’t eaten in fourty eight hours, and I’m not about to be held responsible for your death when you die of hunger, so get your ass in the kitchen before I dump this food over your stupid head.”

He challenges you. “You’re brave talking to somebody who could destroy your life like that.”

“Do it, I literally have nothing to lose,” you answer. “Please eat something. I made it with love and care.”

Jeongguk relents, sighing at his paperwork but nonetheless moving away from his home office and following you like a child towards the direction of the kitchen. He feels bad, you know he feels bad, and he circles his arms around your body as you walk, stumbling into the space of the kitchen and smelling the familiar aroma of pork rice stew. Alas, he sees the bowl steaming in his spot at the table and his eyes follow you as you hum and set start to washing the dishes.

“Y/N-”

“No words, just eating,” you instruct. “Bone apple tit.”

He grins, then, and takes a seat. “You know that’s not the phrase, right?”

“Tell that to Twitter,” you sigh.

(5) Giving them a kiss before going to work and they are still in bed.

Jeongguk prefers to see you when he doesn’t have work the next day, because leaving when you’re asleep is an asshole move in any dictionary. So, when one of his men phones him at four in the morning and relays the horror that someone’s died on his property, Jeongguk has to fight the demons that almost convince him to hand the job over to somebody who gives a fuck about the intruder stuck on his barbed fence.

He gets up, anyway.

Next to him, in the bed that belongs to you because this is your new apartment, Jeongguk stares down at you and feels a tug in his stomach. Guilt, it follows him everywhere like a ghost.

Before he leaves, he likes to give you a little kiss for the morning, so the tingling sensation reminds you that despite being an asshole and leaving without properly saying goodbye, he still gives several shits about you, and will be back when he can be.

(6) Tucking your head into their neck during a hug.

Jeongguk wants to hang Taehyung for making him remember the reasons why you had to move across the city to a new apartment.

It had, of course, been Jeongguk’s fault, and when the notification came from an exhausted worker in his line of work that the alarm system in your apartment had been triggered for an intruder, Jeongguk remembers all he saw was red.

The front door was forced open, a body indent in the wood and the front porch ransacked and littered with shards of glass and bullets. Inside was no prettier, with mess scattered everywhere and photos smashed on the floors. The carpets were stained with red that Jeongguk prayed was just wine, the glass coffee table in two pieces and a knife covered in red on the floor. Jeongguk and his men, along with the few police officers Jeongguk could actually trust in this god-forsaken hellhole, noticed that the blood belonged to one of the intruders who lay dead on the stairs.

Nobody knows how Jeongguk got through the apartment so fast, and why, without any hesitation, he murdered the remaining intruders without suggesting questioning and torture. That was his go-to when it rarely concerned you. He wanted those stupid enough to even try and go after you to really fucking regret it as he picked off fingernails and made them suffer for hours or days. This time he just killed, and moved onwards, calling your name like a mantra.

Jeongguk could have cried when you emerged, petrified, from inside one of the closets. Upon seeing you, Jeongguk collapsed his gun on the floor and stepped towards you protectively, pulling you in tightly for a hug. Sobbing into his neck, you hugged him tighter, feeling finally safe when his hand held the back of your head, like you were a precious thing that was of value.

You were of the highest value to Jeongguk.

“Fuck you,” Jeongguk barks suddenly, and Taehyung shrugs and exits the office. All he had asked was if he loved you.

(7) Lightly kissing on top of a freshly formed bruise.

There might be the assumption that Jeongguk comes home with more bruises than you do. Which is true, technically, and there’s no hesitation from your end in nursing them to a comfortable recovery.

On rare occasion, Jeongguk comes home and finds you exhibiting a new purple blob on your skin. Like today. 

Jeongguk hasn’t seen you in two days, and when he lets himself into your apartment with the key he has glued to him at all times, he follows the silence and light to the bathroom. You sit on the edge of your bathtub, gently rubbing cream on your knee in little circles.

“What happened here?” he asks quickly, and you continue rubbing with your tongue poking out between your lips.

“You’ll laugh, don’t ask,” you mutter.

“Hey, I won’t laugh,” Jeongguk says. He rests his weight against the doorframe, “You open the front door the wrong way again?”

Ha! You laugh humourlessly. “Worse!” You look up at him sadly, “I tripped in the parking lot carrying my groceries. It’s on camera and everything, I want to die.”

Jeongguk pokes the inside of his mouth to resist laughing. “Well, fuck. That’s your leg ruined.”

“I know,” you pout. “Good thing you’re my sugar daddy- wanna pay for cosmetic leg surgery?”

“I like your bruised up legs,” says Jeongguk.

“Me too, but not these ones.”

“Bruh, that’s enough cream on your skin,” Jeongguk exclaims, moving forward to snatch the cream from your hands. “More is not better. Come on, you’re okay.”

“It hurts.”

“Boohoo,” he sighs. You don’t move. “Ugh, whatever. Come’re.”

Jeongguk drops the cream tube onto the sink but it clatters into the bowl. He’ll move it later if he remembers to, and he pretends it’s hard to pick you up off the bathtub and carries you swiftly out of the bathroom and into the living room. Things have barely moved since he last came to visit; the swarms of paper still invade your coffee table and your laptop is on sleep mode by a half-empty coffee cup filled with hot chocolate, because he knows your standing on coffee. Everything is a lot messier now that you’ve decided you want to go back to school, but at least Jeongguk knows it keeps you busy when he’s away.

“Oh,” he says suddenly, as you’re sat down with one leg up around him still. He pokes at a spot on your leg and you squirm, “there’s another one.”

You peer to look, “Oh, yeah, that one’s you.”

“Oh.” He pauses, “Pretty, though.”

You huff like a little baby and he dares you with raised eyebrows. That keeps you silent and Jeongguk moves his body at an angle to the right, sweeping to kiss the bruise better, the bruise that he made a few nights ago with tender love and care.

“All better,” he assures.

“It feels better already.”

“Mm. Magic.”

(8) Buying them something unrequested because it made you think of them.

“So, I was at a school fayre today.”

“Really?” Jeongguk sits with his laptop on his legs, and your legs are tangled around his body like some sort of jungle maze. He rarely works on his bed, not unless the work is sudden and he can’t help it. You’ve just come in, dived on the bed and claimed his waist as something to squeeze your legs around.

“Yep. Like, one of those little craft things where students sell their shit and make money from it. You know, supporting local artists! It’s really cute, if I was good at something I’d have participated.”

Jeongguk thinks of things you’re good at, and there’s a lot. “Aw. There’s always next year.”

“Yeah,” you reason. “Anyway- point is, is that I got you something.”

Jeongguk stills for a second, glancing over his right shoulder to see you, “Me?”

“Yep. You.”

“What did you get?” he asks, and then he’s back to checking blueprints.

You untangle your legs and slide off the bed, retreating to your bag slung across the room by the bedroom door. From here, you take out a small little pin-badge and when you’re sat next to Jeongguk again, you fiddle with it until it catches his attention.

“What’s this?” asks Jeongguk.

“It’s a badge of honour,” you claim, and you slip it into his palms. He fingers the front when he examines it, reading the little words of “Number One Dad” and he stares up at you. “Like it?”

“It’s for me?” he asks again.

“Yeah. You can wear it and like, I don’t know, think of me,” you shrug.

Jeongguk thinks for a moment. Even though it’s stupid, and cliche and a little bit embarrassing, he still thinks it’s funny and thoughtful.

“Want me to wear it to work?” he asks you.

“Oh, absolutely,” you encourage. “I’ll get Taehyung an uncle badge if he gets pissy.”

“Hey, you’re mine and he’s not allowed a relationship to you, no matter what definition,” Jeongguk pouts. “He wants a sugar niece, well...he’ll have to look somewhere else.”

You gape. “Wow. Who thought you had it in you to be so possessive.”

“Please, with a pussy like that of course I’m possessive,” he teases. He’s joking.

“My power,” you sigh anyway, and jump off the bed claiming that you’re hungry. Jeongguk looks at the badge again and pops it in his breast pocket before he loses it and regrets it.

(9) Participating in their hobby even if it doesn’t personally interest you.

Jeongguk’s bored out of his brain.

He has no idea how you can be so fascinated by this stupid game where you’re essentially in debt, but he still sits and watches you tour him around this weird island that is inhabited by ducks and an ugly gorilla villager dressed in pink. And to think that he had a part to play in all of this, because his bank account definitely helped pay for this Nintendo Switch and game.

“Do you like my beach?” you ask him. It’s literally just sand and one coconut tree, and a few shells by the water. Oh, there’s a beach chair on there too, but it makes little difference. “I’m poor, I can’t afford furniture yet.”

“Can’t you just make it?”

“I can, but I’m sick of making axes to collect wood,” you explain with a grudge against the fact that tools now break in this Animal Crossing game. Jeongguk hums like he’s invested, and he tries to be, because he cares about you too much to unintentionally hurt your feelings by displaying his crippling disinterest.

“Oh. Makes sense.”

“Can I show you my hybrid flower garden?”

He sighs. “Yeah, you wanted to show me all of your island, right?”

You nod enthusiastically. “Once you’ve had a tour, I can make you a profile and you can play too. You can live next door to me!”

“Why can’t we share a house?” Jeongguk presses.

“Because I don’t think it works like that, babe,” you confess. “Anyway. Here’s my garden.”

(10) Sitting in comfortable silence while eating a meal.

He’s tired. You’re tired.

The radio plays quietly updating Seoul on the fires that spread across the city today, and Jeongguk smells like smoke and salt. He keeps his head down as he eats his meal, something he brought home with him to make up for the fact that he’s been absent for almost a week now. You have so many things to say and he has so many things he needs to say to make up for everything, but nothing is said tonight.

You know he’s having a hard time, because Jeongguk’s been smoking again. He smoked on the balcony earlier, and once again in the bedroom. There are now ashtrays around your own apartment, and you don’t even smoke. Jeongguk takes a drink of bourbon and swallows it dry.

You look up at him from across the table, not wanting to press the issue when you know it’ll end in an argument, and then sex to make up for it. You’re both too tired to fuck today, too tired to speak. Just being in each other's company is enough for tonight. The only words he says are goodnight and something you don’t catch as you’re drifting off to sleep. Jeongguk’s awake all night, the fires burn until early hours, and the smoke smell is still there in the morning even when he isn’t.

[allkinds-oftrash]

Ya girl is watching the latest HSM series ep and Imma live blog it hshshs and will add my reactions under the cut so it doesn't end up a long post. Anyways, let's goo:

AHHHH THE MORNING SHOW WITH GINA AND EJ WE LOVE TO SEE IT

They really said we're gonna let life imitate art with Nini and Olivia huh

Ricky was SUPPORTIVE??? Damnn I really thought we gonna get a classic Ricky tantrum....

But also wow sir that sounds salty and should definitely talk to someone abt how you're feeling...A therapist maybe 👀

I know we needed to contextualise how Ricky felt abt the song but I really wanted to see Nini's interview in full!!

Sebby you're so cute I do wanna see yall do DEH

Shjshshs not the rights not being available for another 5 years 😭😭

I dunno how they're in great shape and closer to the Menkies Gold after not having a single proper rehearsal, but go off Miss Jenn

Omg honestly Kourt's costumes are always amazing and on point Imma excited to see it

Kourt is such a simp we love to see it

Carlos is so pissy this episode we love to see it shshhs

Also love the way Seb calms him down and keeps him nice it's such a funny dynamic

"We had 20 people make our Belle dress over 50 hours" Okay North High shut the fuck up

I'm calling it now the reason North High knows so much is cos Howie is the leak and Kourt has been unwittingly telling him. The way her phone keeps going off as they discuss how North High knows everything is really good foreshadowing if my prediction is right

Also like her phone went off just as Carlos said "How did they know that?" THAT'S PEAK FORESHADOWING

If Howie ain't in North High, I dunno what Tim is doing

GSJAGSHAH KOURTNEY MAKING ABS FOR EJ I CANNOT

"I have abs" We know sweetie

"I PADDED THE THUSH FOR YOU" "AWW THANKS KOURT I NEEDED THAT" THIS INTERACTION IS EVERYTHING THAT WAS SO FUNNY!! I love that it is now canon that EJ has abs but no butt love that for him

Okay but like damn these costumes are great!! North High can fuck right off with its high end ones I just wanna see lowkey homemade costumes by students; I'd watch a Broadway show if I wanted to see professional costumes okay

Damn Carlos has killer eyesight clocking in that mask in the trunk

GINA BBY DON'T SAY THAT AND HAHSGSH NINI NUDGING HER WAS SO FUNNY

Nini's little look over at Gina was like "Omg you guys my girlfriend is so cute and dumb" GINI STANS HOW WE FEELING?

Miss Jenn don't be that naive, your boyfriend probably put them up to it

That Insta page is prophetic with their timing tbh; all the info is a leak obviously looking at your Howie but like the timing of it all. Those kiddos don't know that they are discussing the stolen mask at this exact moment (Kourt has put down her phone after Carlos snapped at her so Howie doesn't know they are talking abt it rn)

"We don't dance with the enemy" *cuts to her dancing with Zackey later*

SEBBY WEARING THE TEACUP COSTUME OMG HE'S GOING MAKE SUCH A CUTE CHIP (yes I am still mad Seb/Joe was robbed but Imma fangirl over the costume anyway)

Wtf why does North High look so expensive - they are literally in the same district as East High right??? How did they get this much funding

North High is a very artsy and rich for a public school; they should have had Nini go here instead of YAC tbh (like this campus feels like what YAC should have been) NOW THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN AN INTERESTING STORYLINE

Seblos' dynamic IS ON POINT THIS EP I really love my bois so much and their back and forth is hilarious

Shhshs DIANE who loves volleyball and North High okay I totally believe it

WHY ARE RED AND ASHLYN SO KINKY EVERY DAMN EPISODE TIM THESE ARE UNDERAGED CHARACTERS STOP IT

Shshsh we love Gina knowing herself and practicing self control by volunteering to be the lookout

Omg yall listen to Carlos and stfu they are so lucky no one saw or heard them yelling Wildcats

Oh no no no no no Miss Jenn you gonna get sucked in; this is gonna be so messy

Omg I saw someone post about this scene before I watched the ep YALL ARE RIGHT THAT BOI HITTING ON GINA IS SO FINE Babes go for that one, not EJ

NOT THEM FAKE DATING UGH E W TIM STOP MAKING ROMANTIC PORTWELL A T H I N G I honestly do not understand how some of yall can ship it romantically knowing Sofia is a whole underaged babey and Matty is a whole ass grown man - like I get the appeal of the Wonderstudies getting together and they do have chemistry but the irl age gap is creepy and outweighs the appeal of shipping them romantically

As I always say; Portwell/Wonderstudies should be a BROTP not an OTP

Ugh Brotp Portwell would have clocked Lily right away; romantic Portwell making googly eyes at each other isn't helping anyone

Living for Nini getting the recognition she deserves - I really like her solo arc this season she's so much more interesting without Ricky tbh

Aww Kourt you simp I love her and I'm so happy she's happy I wanna be wrong about Howie being a North High kid

Where is the mask??

OHMYGOD THESE KIDS COMING IN LIKE A HORROR MOVIE

Lily really wishes she was Jesse St. James huh; you could never Lily so stop

Andrew Barth Feldman and his cute little French accent I love him so much

Hnng Miss Jenn gonna get manipulated by this hoe. Omg wowow Zackey really is a hoe, making out with another girl before the show THE AUDACITY OF HIM SAYING MISS JENN WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH I WILL THROW HANDS WITH THIS MOFO

Wait the kids didn't steal it BUT WHAT IF ZACKEY DID

Ssjsgfajhdfg I CANNOT WITH ANDREW'S ACCENT but I can't tell if its really bad or really good but I'm also confused why didn't they just cast a French person as Antonie shshhs Antoine is adorableee and a little shit the best type of character

Lily is so annoying b y e sis bye and Olivia Keegan is talented I just wish they didn't make her character such a cartoony villain type

"How about if we bop to the top" SEBBY I LOVE YOU AND NEVER STOP BEING SO CUTE I SWEAR and Awww Carlos called him Honey I am s o f t

Hnng why do these fools are really gonna give into North High calling them chickens

OHHH NO SHE DIDN'T JUST SAY THAT ABOUT ASHLYN FUCK A DANCE OFF I AM ABOUT TO THROW HANDS WITH A 16 YEAR OLD

"She told us not to dance with the enemy. She's better than this" No Sebby, she's not *cuts to her dancing with Zackey* AND OMG THE WAY I SAW THIS EDIT COMING BEFORE IT CAME

Ooooh I like this song wayyy more whatever the mess The Mob Song became (when I first heard it drop on Spotify yesterday) Around You is such a great song musically and lyrically very relevant to these two and gosh I love their voices together

They have so much chemistry damn, go home Mike (well he technically has oop) and Mr. Mazzara

YES YOU DO MISS JENN YOU ALWAYS HAD IT

Oh god this is the scene from the trailer; she's gonna make a move on Ricky isn't she?? Leave him alone Lily he doesn't need a 3rd girl to be confused about he needs a therapist

Lily shut the fuck up with quasi; STOP TRYING TO MAKE QUASI HAPPEN

"I love Nini's song" Sure, Jan.

...Okay yes you should have called him out but don't bait him LIKE THAT oop there's the scene from the trailer

Ohmygod is Andrew Barth Feldman gonna hit on Ashlyn

Okay this is so cute but also I am VERY annoyed with the way this show handles its characters like they aren't relevant or important unless they get into a relationship or a love triangle?? That's such a shitty way to give out screentime and arcs to characters. Is it not enough to develop the characters on their own and strengthen their friendship???

HUH TIM why you so obsessed with compulsory heterosexuality??(well also homosexuality for Seblos but they are the only ones I'm not annoyed with their relationship cos its a hella big step for Disney to have a gay couple and their relationship isn't in our faces or overshadows the plot and its just spinkles of cuteness every time they interact - they are honestly who Rini wishes they were; besties in love. They are a couple that Tim should be taking notes from; leave the relationship drama in the background, focus on the theatre and friendship aspect of everything)

My mini rant aside; this is a very adorable interaction between Ashlyn and Antoine.

"TOM HOLLAND ON STILTS" GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE WITH THAT COMPARISON I AM SCREAMING ANTOINE THAT'S SO FUNNY

This is so funny he keeps picking out the hottest guys of the group; as if he himself isn't the French version of Big Red they look super alike ngl shshsh

WHY YOU RUIN IT WITH THAT ANTOINE I WAS ROOTING FOR YOU

Drama between Antoine and Red is already spicing up shshsh I cannot

Why are you so dramatic with the shuffle Lily gtfo of here...also this doesn't make sense?? She wasn't even on a BATB playlist; what if a non BATB song came on ahahah

Good to know they aren't big fans of The Mob Song like I am Awww EJ you cutie, okay I will appreciate the OG Mob Song just for you

OH WAIT HE PROLLY LIKES IT COS ITS A GASTON LED SONG TIM GIMME THE EJ SOLO I DESERVE IN THIS NUMBER

I'm being robbed of Gaston for the last 7 eps I at least deserve an EJ solo for compensation

The way the set looks straight out of Broadway but also like omg the blue lighting and fancy stage gave me intense flashbacks to that Glee episode where Vocal Adrenaline sang Bohemian Rhapsody

RICKY STOP BEING SALTY AND ACTUALLY COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND LIKE A NORMAL PERSON

OMG THE SUBTITLES SAID ITS HOWIE SINGING AS THE BEAST I FUCKING CALLED IT

Howie you hoe you gonna break my girl Kourtney's heart

Yeah...still not a fan of Antoine's Dance Remix

Yall know Gina would kill the dance number if she wasn't wearing that fit

Okay but it's Gaston led song WHY DOES EVERYONE BUT EJ HAVE A SOLO IN THIS SONG??

First the Beasts led it (Howie sounded better than Ricky ngl), then the Lumieres (their voices worked hella well together; I always forget what a talented singer Frankie is THEY NEED TO GIVE HIM A SOLO SONG) and now the Belles are going at it (Ashlyn's voice is superior)

BIG RED BEING JEALOUS AND SALTY IS SO FUNNY ITS LIKE A PUPPY BEING ANGRY I CRI

...Did anyone really win, Lily??? STFU

CARLOS IS RIGHT AND HE SHOULD SAY IT

Oooh I did see someone talk about this when the Rose Song dropped last week, apparently its illegal to add songs to a musical you're doing for a school play; I really thought the show would brush past that irl rule but I guess they are playing into it

THE WAY EVERYONE TURNED TO EJ FOR THE SPORTS METAPHOR I AM D Y I N G AND HIS FACE WAS GOLDEN! ITS LIKE THAT LISA SIMPSON MEME SHHSHSH

Okay Nini is being a little pissy about leaving her song out of the show and its a little selfish to wanna keep it at the risk of being disqualified but I also understand why she's hurt

Everyone is dog piling on her right now being against her idea and it feels like they are being against her song and her herself instead of them not wanting to be disqualified. Also like she poured her heart and soul into the song after Miss Jenn lowkey rushed her to write it. So I can see why this feels like a rejection of her and her song and why she's so hurt rather than her seeing the big picture right now

It doesn't help that Ricky said the final blow causing her to walk off

Okay maybe Zackey gets some rights for being chill and wanting the kids to be peers

THIS MOTHERFUCKER I KNEW HE WAS SHADY Also the way I gasped even though I predicted he stole the mask halfway through this ep shshsh

Stab him Miss Jenn STAB HIM

Bitch why you so threatened by East High if yall have such a Broadway-esque show planned??? They honestly should have stuck to the Little Mermaid; I really wanted to see the aquarium

"It's just a song Ricky" "A song can mean everything" Do you get deja vu? Anyone else getting intense flashbacks to Jan when DL first dropped and all the drama happened 👀

YES PLEASE STAY CO ANCHORS Gosh I love them so much esp once you take the romantic connotations out of their interactions

ROUGE GRAND I'M SCREAMING

I love this long take of checking in with everyone's relationship status (still hate how romantically focused this show has become but still a cool shot)

I K N E W IT I WAS RIGHT

Okay but like looking at Kourtney's face I have never wanted to be wrong so bad GOD I HATE IT HERE I really think he likes her and I hope they work it out

Nini setting up her own music acc feels like when Olivia rebranded her whole IG to be just for her music stuff - love this for both of them

AHHHHH SHE'S NINA NOW YALL

I know everyone loves her as Nini but like I have always loved the name Nina and it really suits her to be honest also shows how she's growing up now and kind of leans into the lyric "I won't be confined to your point of view" from The Rose Song because Nini is the nickname Ricky gave her so it shows that she's outgrowing him too and I love that for her!

Overall thoughts; they really crammed all the North High drama into one ep huh. Personally would have liked it if all of this was spread out throughout the last few episodes; like different hijinks for every episode. I'm just a big fan of properly setting up the overall arc over the season instead of patching it together closer to the climax/end of the show. Cos now it lowkey feels like two different seasons - 2A felt like The Rini/Rina Show esp with YAC storyline and whatever was going on with Rina and now 2B is finally feeling like what this season should have been all this time

[liquidlikecats]

SIKE not really time to talk to the 3 bitches here who also play 3h. And by talk I mean that I'll put my thoughts on my current run out here and yall do whatever

So rn im doing AM lunatic classic and uh.... It's been an Experience TM. Battle prep is more important than ever. It's like 50% of the battle imo. You'll NEVER catch me going out into the field without checking everyone's battalions, weapons, combat arts and abilities.

It'ssss been fucking tricky. A big part of the last two battles I've done (Gronder and Anettes Paralogue) has been timing the enemy reinforcements. Learning that I can't do a certain thing like putting a unit someplace or killing a specific enemy until I've cleared a region out lest I'm overwhelmed by a new wave of enemies. Been a key factor with those two.

Oh and the first battle post ts? When you get to mop those damn thieves up? Took me several tries. P much every battle does actually. It was reaaaally fucking difficult to keep Dimitri and Byleth alive in that terrain and with the God damn boat load of enemies. Also had to play around a bit and see since I was missing four crucial units (Dedue, Petra, Hapi, Yuri). It was... An experience. That aged me by like 10 years.

Battles usually take me over an hour and they can get really fucking intense. Beat Gronder earlier but the fucking alliance reinforcements were tricky so it took me several attempts til I caved and reclassed Mercie, Anette and Ashe. Dedue was my fucking mvp tho, he was insane.

Made him a wyvern lord since I'm not a fan of armored units and he's doing amazing actually! He's got two big bad axes, the aegis shield and a lance and ever since I've slapped quick riposte on him he's been tearing thru his enemies like nobody's business. Well, also thanks to the +20 hit which I have for every single lion, courtesy of the snipers only run I did.

Felix is a wyvern lord as well! Wanted a change of pace. I was considering making him a war master, but I'll save that for my next run. He's fucking nuts, got 100+ avoid when waiting. I also gave him the chalice cuz he's my special little boy and making me very proud.

Yuri's a sniper this time! It's been a change of pace alright. Lowers his spd but his dex is p good. He's got way less avoid but he does have deadeye and canto so it's not actually a problem. Well, once I'd fixed his strength. He does have 88 crit which is really nice.

Something I haven't really had to rely on in previous runs (hard/normal) is having a secondary class ready. Byleth's got trickster, Anette and Mercie are maining gremory atm but also make damn fine valkyres, Ashe's got swordsmaster/assassin while Yuri has sniper/assassin.

This run is teaching me a Lot about flexibility. Changing up entire setups for big battles to make em work smh. And the timing of divine pulses. In previous runs I'd pulse it immediately when something didn't quite work out (like failing to kill an important enemy) but now I just wait and see. I don't have enough pulses to waste em on anything but preventing death and shit like that can be made work.

I think that's most of my thoughts for now? I currently play in one battle sessions since they're so intense. Now gonna go do cleanup after the Gronder battle (new month and all, gotta prep for the next one). I always take screenshots of how they're all doing at the very end of my run, maybe I'll post some of those once I finally get there.

[carbootsoul]

i was tagged by @katarahairloopies!!! thank u :mwah:

name: leo! @/zeitgeistofnow on ao3, @lazypigeon & @timetohope on here, altho i’m considering uh switching back to not having an art blog :/ i have to think abt it.

fandom(s): ace attorney is my main one rn bc i’m replaying the games with a friend of mine and it’s reminding me how invested i am in the characters!! a lot of my recent fic is atla stuff, altho i’ve been distancing myself from the fandom bc i’ve kinda exhausted my interest in it. finally i’ve been reading a lot of mp100 fic but i don’t think i’ll ever write for it. i just love how dumb all the characters r (with the dubious exception of ritsu)

where you post: ao3!! tbh i always get suprised when people say they write/read fic on any other platform like i haven’t messed around w wattpad or ff.net since middle school... catch up........

most popular oneshot: going just by “one chapter” as the definition of a oneshot, the firestarters, bc it’s fluffy and modern au :) i wouldn’t necessarily call it a oneshot tho bc to me a oneshot shows like, one scene? so like by my definition and your sweet sweet sun makes me crazy (i wanna lay you down and see how you amaze me is my most popular!! (also @ kit u thought UR fic titles were unnecessarily long??? i’ve hit the ao3 LIMIT for characters in titles. it’s about the aesthetic

most popular multichapter fic: sdkjflakjlkj it’s two crowned kings; and one that stood alone, which is a w359 fic i wrote back in late 2017. it’s literally the last fic i haven’t orphaned from when i actually wrote podcast fic (i have 4 other podcast fics but they were all borne out of nostalgia and written after i stopped participating in the fandom). i rewrote all but the last chapter? the last two? about a year ago and i fucked up halfway through so like chapter 6 and 7 are repeated and there’s something missing but i’m too lazy to fix it. no one’s going to read it now anyway :) it WAS the top minlace fic for a little while tho which i take great pride in.

favorite story you’ve written so far: oh that’s a hard question akfsldkfj i honestly like most of them!! and i write a LOT so there’s a lot to choose from. tonight, we are young is def one of my favorites- it was fun to write and i got to explore the ways zuko and yue r similar, which i LOVE to do outside of a zukka/yukka view. you can lean on my arm as you break my heart  is one that i’m really proud of? the whole “cooking as an expression of bato’s love” is definitely some of my favorites. a lot of my ace attorney fics would be categoried as my favorites if i hadn’t improved, too, if that makes sense. like they’re no long my favorites because i can see where my writing is shitty and it bothers me, but if i had written them a month ago they’d be my favorite.

fic you were nervous to post: figures 1-5: killing gods def!! it’s a lot more purple-prose-y than most of my fics and it was also written before i’d kinda like emersed myself in the atla fandom so i didn’t have as good a grasp on the general understanding of zuko’s character as i do now. tbh it’s one i’m rly happy w tho!! i have a few people leave really nice comments on it and rereading them makes me really happy. also it was the start of me hating the position of fire lord and being at least passively anti-it in my fics.

how you choose your titles: they’re almost all song lyrics!! only 14 of my 50 words AREN’T song lyrics and about half of those are from before i started writing ace attorney fic lol. sometimes i go into a fic with a song in mind for the vibes and then i usually go with lyrics from that (like in ‘cuz we’re the greatest /they’ll hang us in the louvre), but otherwise i usually pick an artist i’ve been listening to and go through their songs until i find a lyric that fits. sometimes the lyric doesn’t even really fit the fic and i just chose it at random or because i searching up the word “fly” in my spotify library or whatever. honestly i like coming up with titles? i know a lot of fic writers hate it but being able to just use song lyrics is v soothing for me and while i know that most people won’t search out a song just bc it’s a fic title like.. seeing that the title of a fic is a hozier lyric does affect how i read it and i kinda like that.

do you outline? i outline my long form/multichaptered fics with varying strictness. usually anything over ~8k will have some kind of outline. sometimes i go into it with every single scene planned out, sometimes it’s just notes on the side of the google doc that say “it's about MORE family. about how it's not betraying your existing family to find more” and “scenes i want to include: [...]” and “vampires... ngl kinda hot.” i’m trying to outline super strictly less bc i’ve found it’s less fun? but i do try to keep a plot arc in mind. since most of my fics are more character-driven than plot-driven, that usually just means keeping track of what character development i want to happen or what is motiviating the characters. 

complete: um everything posted on ao3 i guess. also the MULTITUDE of orphaned fics out there asksfjldkj i always click ‘leave my pseud on’ so if u look up my username you see all of my fics and then a. lot of other ones.

in progress: - a fic titled ‘dad phoenix’ that is actually just a no DL-6 au with defense attorney miles edgeworth and single dad bartender phoenix where neither of them want to date for A While but phoenix gets wrapped up in one of miles’s cases. it’s about family. it’s about writing teenagers. it’s about the background franmaya which is ALWAYS what i’m here for in wrightworth fics - a franmaya werewolf/vampire au because i’m ~gay~ and love rivals to lovers and also franziska and maya both being angry their older brothers r dating each other. - my secret santa fic!! which i can’t talk about much but it does feature toph and zuko and also piandao and jeong jeong???? idk where they came from but they are Part Of The Fic Now also i forgot iroh existed for half the fic and wrote piandao as zuko’s father figure and now i’m in too deep. - a 5+1 bakoda fic (maybe a bato/hakoda/kay fic??? i need to decide. that’s part of why this fic is still incomplete bc i can’t decide which relationship dynamic i prefer) that’s 5 times bato said he loves hakoda and one time hakoda said it back. possibly i have already written him saying i love u back and i need to change the title a little. - retail au klapollo where klavier works at an overpriced boutique and apollo comes in to buy earrings for nahyuta’s birthday. klavier gives him a punch card (one that the store doesn’t actually offer anymore as a bid to get apollo to come back) and all of apollo’s family come in to use the punch card and also give klavier variations on the shovel talk/find out if he’s actually into apollo. - a LOT of atla fics that i don’t think i’ll ever finish :(

coming soon/not yet started:  - i want to write some blackmadhi bc they’re.. cute..... and it’s a good excuse to also write athena and i love her - my stuff for yueki week!!! i have NOT prepped enough but hopefully i’ll remember in time! i wrote the prompts in a way that kinda set up stuff i’ve already wanted to write (don’t look at me lol) so hopefully i’ll get at least two or three fics finished in time. - i want to rewrite the wrightworth fic i have about them not getting married bc it was interesting and i like what i wrote about but i think i could have written it better and made it more interesting. rewriting fics is hard tho bc i’m never sure if it makes sense to just edit in the new work or to repost it? and then if u repost it do u delete the old one? conflicting so i might just not

do you accept prompts? totally!!! a disclaimer tho i’m not super into writing atla stuff anymore (most of the atla stuff i’m still writing is  something i made a commitment to finish) so if your prompt is an atla one i probably won’t do it :/ basically anything else is fair game tho!! podcasts/aa/sa/uh i don’t remember anything else but like if you search a fandom on my blog and come up with more than two posts about it chances r i’d be happy to write fic for it!

upcoming work that you’re most excited about: oh huh i mean probably the no dl-6 au!!! it’s the longest ace attorney fic i’ve written already and since it’s wrightworth it’ll get more attention than any franmaya fic i write. my standards r so high now tho after getting to much feedback from atla fans... love u all... obviously i have no choice but to pressure my atla mutuals into playing ace attorney. pls ask abt it bc i WIll Give You A Sales Pitch about why you’d like it in relation to atla

tagging: i’m not rly tagging anyone!!! @deadflora if you still consider urself a fic writer also consider urself tagged! also any of my other mutuals who write fic i just can’t think of anyone rn

[gmsguild]

multiples of 10 for the character asks!!

Thanks Hannah! Answers will refer to my main character, Sahar, my tiefling wizard in a home Tal’Dorei game, but she’s away from the party rn since I’m DMing (our group rotates DMs between arcs). Other folks, if you want to hear more about some of my other characters, let me know! Sahar’s gotten the most playtime recently, but Keoren the halfling monk, Astara the aasimar cleric, Squall the water genasi druid, or Kallisto the minotar barbarian (among others) are all also fair game (some are less fleshed out than others) 10. If your character had time to pick up any artisan’s tools, game set, instrument, etc., what would it be? So this isn’t an actual instrument/mechanic in the game, and it’s never come up in game, but Sahar can sing. Like, really well. She grew up in a troupe of traveling entertainers and learned from a young age, but she stopped when her troupe died (onset of the Tragic Backstory phase, hit me up for more on this I’m an asshole to my characters) and hasn’t really sung in the last few years. She enjoys dragonchess (keeps her mind active). I think a piece of her would like to paint more (she’s proficient in forger’s tools, it’s just a different sort of art) or pick up the lute and start singing again, this time accompanying herself. 

20. What is the biggest mistake your character has ever made? It’s hard to say whether the late teen years/early 20s spent as an assassin were a mistake since she really didn’t have a choice in the matter? I think at this point she’s starting to view the years she spent working for the Clasp after escaping her Tragic Backstory phase as a mistake. She didn’t have to stay in the life of crime, but she did and she’s not wholly sure how she feels about that? She’s not exactly a law and order gal, but her alignment has been shifting steadily from the neutral evil/True Neutral that she started at in the Tragic Backstory phase towards neutral good/chaotic good and I think she’s questioning whether or not she’s done more harm than good in her life and how she can make up for that. She also really really regrets leaving behind her baby sister in Ank’Harel when she left to try and find work but it’s been almost 10 years now... that’s a fun knife for a future DM rotation to stab me with. 

30. What would most people think when they first see your character? Violently purple tieflings with blackwork partial sleeve tattoos and ice-blue eyes aren’t exactly a common sight in Tal’Dorei. And recently, she’s spent a lot of time in small towns that tend to be a little more judgmental and less cosmopolitan than the big cities. Fear, fascination, disgust, awe... all are fairly common reactions. 

40. Where does your character feel the most at home? Sahar has never settled down in one place. She grew up a nomad, and the Tragic Backstory and her recovery from that left her living a very nomadic lifestyle with her two siblings (triplets!), and now she’s living on the road with her party. She feels most comfortable with a good book or some new spell she’s working on, a nice warm drink, and a cozy spot in an inn by the fire with a few friends. But anywhere with family, chosen or blood related, is home to her. 

50. Who in the party would your character prioritize rescuing, in dire circumstances? That’s a tough one, because Sahar is developing Feelings for one party member but also feels like she has to be the Big Sister to our warlock... She’s also an intensely logical person so like, she’d probably go for whoever she thought had the best chance of helping her save as many people as possible. In a split second decision, it would depend on who she was closest to but I think a big piece of her would pull towards our party warlock since she reminds her of the baby sister she left behind.

60. What decision would the party have to make in order for your character to consider splitting off from the group? It wouldn’t be a single decision. She’s had some concerns about the amount of killing the party does, but at the same time she doesn’t want to leave folks with grudges out there because that’s a knife in the back waiting to happen...  Anything in which children are harmed. If the party knowingly harms children, she’s out of there.  70. What is your character’s biggest pet peeve? People trying to talk to her when she’s ritual casting or absorbed in a problem. She likes to focus. Don’t distract her.  80. How does your character feel about receiving/giving orders? Are they more of a leader, or a follower? Prefers giving. Hates taking. She spent far too long taking orders under threat of torture or with the lives of her siblings held over her head, and she’s started to gain enough confidence to assert herself and she’s very aware she’s Smarter Than You. She’s a team player, but not a follower. Not anymore. She won’t let herself be.  90. Who is your character’s biggest rival? Her siblings Rhana and Zepar in the friendly rivalry sense. There’s some light competition between her and the other spellcasters in the party to do the most impressive shit, but that’s more in her head. And in a less friendly rivalry... she’s got a nemesis or two from her past she wouldn’t mind returning to the Dark Side to kill slowly and painfully. 

100. What, currently, is your character the most curious about? So because of the structure of our group, rotating DMs, she’s split off from the group to do some research in Westruun on a puzzle cube the party nicked off the dead body of a hag they killed, so she’s pretty excited about that. She was a little too curious initially and almost opened a portal to the Hells and freaked out about that for about a week, but now that she’s in a safe place with other trained professionals, I think she’s gonna let that curiosity flow

Whoo! Sorry that’s so wordy that was fun! Thanks! (everyone go check out Hannah’s @drinkingdeadpeopletea sideblog it’s got some great critical role and naddpod content and some other cool shit and she’s a great human!)

[macgyvermedical]

“Let’s Get to it, Nature Boy” a “Lidar+Rogues+Duty” Medical Review

A lot of times I sit down to write these reviews and think something like “wow, there’s a lot to unpack here.” Fortunately for this review, the only thing I thought was that somewhere an NSA agent is definitely going to have to read this because of all the alarming keywords. Hope they like clavicles.

Let’s get to it. Spoilers ahead.

The main story centers around Mac and Desi going on a mission to recover the body of LCDR Robert Reese, an old friend of Mac’s who was presumed dead when his plane crashed in an unauthorized part of Azerbaijan. While there they find that Reese is still alive, though injured, and that a group of American CIA operatives has found a cache of white phosphorus-based chemical weapons which they intend to sell on the black market. Mac and Desi manage to subdue the operatives using homemade tranq darts, prevent the white phosphorus from ending up in the wrong hands, and get Reese back home safely.

The main medical situations in the episode include Mac’s diagnosis and field treatment for Reese’s fractured clavicle, the potential use of white phosphorus as a chemical weapon, and the morphine darts.

A little spoiler for you, the morphine darts are what I’m mad about this week.

The Clavicle:

But let’s start with that clavicle break. The clavicle is the thin bone that makes up the front part of the shoulder, attaching at the shoulder joint and sternum. A broken clavicle is a pretty common sports injury and occurs when the patient falls either directly on the outside of the shoulder, or falls on their hand or forearm and the force travels upward. Due to how close the bone is to the surface, if the bone segments are displaced, deformity from the break is often visible or palpable (feel-able). 

^^The bump is where one of the ends of the bone segments pushed over the other. Euagh.

It’s entirely possible that Reese fell onto his shoulder or forearm when he detached his seat from the parachute, so this (or anything consistent with a fall) is a pretty expected injury. While most remote first aid guides would tell you to sling the arm or wrist (slinging the wrist only takes pressure off the shoulder and reduces pain), the splint Mac makes for it- a version of a “figure eight” splint- is also a real way of splinting a clavicle fracture. The figure eight splint would work much the same way it does in the episode, pulling the outer (distal) part of the clavicle up and back and putting/keeping it in a reasonable place to heal. It would also have the advantage over a simple sling of leaving the affected arm free and somewhat usable (though still not weight-bearing)- something that would be important in a remote and hostile environment.

The thing I’ll nitpick about this scene is the fact that Mac seems to know immediately without looking that Reese has a clavicle fracture, where the break is, and the best way to treat it. Reese was holding his arm awkwardly, looked like he was in pain, reported that he was banged up, and Mac knew that he’d recently fallen out of a tree. Together those would still only point to a shoulder injury, without specifics. Mac would still have to look at it (like, skin level look at it) and probably touch it to know it was a clavicle fracture (and not, say, a dislocation or other fracture) before splinting it.

I understand a lack of assessment was a decision likely made for time’s sake, but assessment is a really, really important part of the process- and it would have made a significant difference in treatment. A figure-eight splint is only helpful when the break is in the middle or closer (proximal) third of the bone, because the strap has to go somewhere that’s not directly over the break. A day after the injury, where they would have been in the episode, there might have been significant swelling and bruising which might make it difficult to know where the break is, and if that figure eight splint would be appropriate.

I probably would have gone with the sling either way, but I see why they did the figure eight (both from a cool TV thing(TM) standpoint and for mobility). Its the lack of assessment that’s the problem, not the intervention for once.

White Phosphorus:

I’m sure you all know the feel when your primary (academic) fascinations in life are toxicology and chemical weapons, so you’re constantly paranoid that you’re one google search or tumblr post away from a SWAT team showing up at your apartment.

About 3 years ago I did a lot of internet research on white phosphorus in order to write a Criminal Minds tag that followed up an episode where a character was tortured with white phosphorus salve (please excuse the minor errors in hospital realism, I had not yet graduated nursing school when I wrote it), and I was really excited that this episode might give me reason to talk about what I learned.

I guess it didn’t exactly, but I’m going to talk about it anyway.

White Phosphorus (known from here on out at WP) is a waxy, yellowish substance useful as a chemical weapon because of its versatility and plethora of uses other than terrorism. It doesn’t occur naturally, but is created and used extensively in industry as a necessary component in the production of fertilizer, cleaning chemicals, munitions, (illegal) fireworks, older rat and cockroach poisons, and certain food additives. Most common exposures are due to industrial spills, not terrorism.

WP can contaminate food, water, and soil as particles, or air as smoke. Eating or drinking contaminated food or water can cause severe gastrointestinal distress and fatal damage to the kidneys, liver, and heart in doses of about 50-100mg. Breathing the smoke can cause airway irritation and coughing, but is rarely if ever fatal at typical concentrations. Exposure to intact skin is also usually not thought to cause lasting damage, though as you’ll see in the next paragraph, that doesn’t happen often.

Another way WP can enter the body, and probably more relevant in the context of its use as a chemical weapon, is through burn wounds. WP tends to burn or explode on contact with any air above 86F (30C), and can cause extensive partial and full-thickness burns. The burns may have a characteristic yellow wound bed, and can pose a hazard to both the patient and rescuers due to the fact that unspent WP particles in the wounds can spontaneously re-ignite. Wounds must be kept damp until the patient is decontaminated to avoid re-ignition of the particles, and the careful use of copper sulfate or silver nitrate as an antidote can make the decontamination process a lot safer and easier.

Note that I don’t recommend googling this unless you have an exceptionally high tolerance for human suffering.

Instead, enjoy these curated pictures:

Picture “A” is of the yellow wound beds, and “B” is all the unspent WP glowing under a UV light. 

The WP passes readily through the burn-damaged tissue, and if the patient survives the burns themselves, can still cause fatal damage to the kidneys, liver, and heart.

Before we move on, I would like to point out one last particularly horrifying aspect of WP poisoning: It does not kill quickly. Initial symptoms of severe gastrointestinal distress may last up to 8 hours, after which a latent period similar to the kind seen in radiation poisoning lasts for about 3 days. Organ failure then develops, which if severe, usually results in death unless dialysis and a liver transplant can happen fast enough.

Tying this back in, you can see why the team didn’t want this getting into the wrong hands.

Morphine Darts

So now we’re finally here at the fun part. And by fun I mean... well, poorly portrayed?

Because honestly? Morphine could take these guys out, or at least make it difficult for them to fight, which would accomplish the goal of leveling the field a little. The problems in this scene lie, as they usually do in TV, in:

The route of administration-

Repeat after me, kids: If you are chucking a needle at someone, you’re hoping against hope to hit a muscle. Did I say “neck needle” anywhere in that sentence? Good. You should know how I feel about them by now.

I know they were going for the needle to have hit the exterior jugular, delivering the dose of morphine IV and therefore making it reasonable that the person could be quickly subdued afterwards without alerting his friends to the guy running around chucking needles at people. To give you an indication of how difficult it would be to do this, however, placing a 18g IV catheter into the exterior jugular (placing an “EJ”) is something RNs are not allowed to do in hospitals because there’s too much room for error. No one, not even MacGyver, could reliably throw something 20 ft and hit the EJ perfectly.

Plus, there’s a lot of really important things in your neck that you don’t want to just forcefully stick needles in randomly. While insulin needles are very small, it would still be safer and more effective and reliable to stick them in large muscles like the thigh or butt, which can also take considerably higher volumes of medication without injury.

The dose-

The validity of the needle chucking contraption notwithstanding, the needles they use in the scene are U100 insulin needles (not exclusive to insulin, that’s just what they’re called), meaning if you filled the entire syringe, the total volume would be only 1ml. Morphine comes in IV concentrations up to 15mg/ml. The most filled syringe I saw in this whole scene was to about the 0.15ml mark, so even assuming they used the frankly ridiculously high concentration of 15mg/ml, that would only be about 2.25mg/dose.

I say “only” because the starting dose of morphine for acute pain clocks in at around 4mg for otherwise healthy people. How much of an impact morphine has has a lot to do with size and tolerance, too. Some of the antagonists in this scene were big enough they probably wouldn’t have been knocked off balance by (or possibly even felt) 2.25mg, let alone felt “10 shots of vodka” as the scene suggests. At the peak of effectiveness, it might have given Desi a slight advantage in a fight, but wouldn’t have taken anyone down.

The time to onset/peak-

The last thing about these I’ll say before I step off (never!) is about the onset time. The “onset” is the length of time it takes, on average, for a drug to begin working, and the “peak” is when it is most effective. This is different between drugs and routes. Morphine’s IV onset is rapid (and at the speed this would have been pushed, probably would have made the person briefly dizzy and nauseated), but it still takes about 20mins to “peak”, so assuming Mac *did* impossibly manage to sink an EJ from 20 feet away and there was a high enough dose to do something, anyone in this scene would still have had plenty of time to alert others or fight before they were incapacitated. The best thing throwing a needle at someone in this scene would do is provide some distraction while Desi takes them out manually.

More realistically, morphine injected into the muscle takes at least 10 minutes for onset and up to an hour to peak and doesn’t have as rough of side effects, meaning overall that no matter the dose, morphine is a really poor choice for a tranq dart (but admittedly, if its what you’ve got, its what you’ve got. Also who decided just leaving it lying out in a supply closet was a good idea? The fact that it hadn’t been stolen yet is a miracle in itself.).

R E F E R E N C E S

So there you have it. If you liked this and want to take a look at other MacGyver reviews I’ve done, you can find them here: Awl - X-Ray + Penny - Duct Tape + Jack - CD + Hoagie Foil - Guts + Fuel + Hope - Wilderness + Training + Survival - Father + Bride + Betrayal

[Patreon] [Ko-Fi]

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Tommy

Ali: okay I need Ali: like fucking Ali: total seriousness from you right now Ali: can you handle that Tommy: whoa Tommy: alright yeah Tommy: unless you're preggo I ain't keeping that to myself for the next 9 like Ali: god no Ali: i know you're gay as hell so the birds and the bees don't worry you none but if anything you should KNOW that means I'm good right now Ali: but this is going to sound like as much of a joke Ali: but it ain't, yeah? Tommy: what you and your girlfriend do or who ain't none of my business but obviously we ain't here for that, are we? Tommy: I'm sitting down, go for it Ali: sure, sure, I'll make you go red later Ali: preferably when I can see/laugh but no, it ain't so Ali: fuck Ali: so this is weird like Ali: beyond Ali: you know Joe finally made an apperance here yeah Tommy: you're scaring me, Kat Tommy: unless he came out I don't reckon I'm ready to hear this Ali: I can't say if that's unwarranted or not, like Ali: soz Ali: basically, he came to me for a drugs hookup Ali: like, that's what the fuck weird enough but you know Ali: do you Ali: so I sent him to Drew, you know, Meena's brother? Ali: he deals now Ali: and then he hit me back up and shit Ali: you gotta tell me if this is some kinda sick joke but the boy sounded deadly serious, like HE was scared Ali: he said Joe asked for heroin, Tommo Tommy: nah nah he's gotta have it twisted Tommy: like he's pretty so he don't have to be the smartest, yeah Tommy: it'll be like a bad brain day so he needed to go harder than his prescription maybe but Tommy: not that fucking hard Ali: I wanna think that but Ali: he looked sick, Joe Ali: and idk how they could've had that miscommunication like smack is smack it's not like, nah I want this type of pill not that Tommy: probably got his slang fucked up Tommy: he's like an old man you know Tommy: sometimes Ali: he ain't that green Ali: fucking hell, even Ro could list a few names for it Ali: I literally do not know what to do Ali: because as soon as he came back, basically Ali: he's gone Ali: said his uni friend was in a car crash or some bullshit Ali: maybe it ain't but the timing reeks of it Tommy: fuck Tommy: this is so bad Tommy: did they see him, ma or da? Ali: nope, mum was taking rocky to the park or some shit whilst dad did the shop so they're all due back any time and I've gotta pass on the message Ali: minus the drugs, presumably Ali: what the fuck Tommy: don't say shit to them Tommy: she'll fucking Tommy: alright, where are Bea & Fraze like right now? Ali: idk Ali: not here, he waited long as he could to sneak out like he was never here Ali: should I tell them Ali: I swear to God I ain't got no wires crossed Ali: I've got all the messages from Drew, it's black and white so unless he's a real mentalist and just taking the piss Tommy: you deffo ain't that green & jesus all signs really are pointing to proper smackhead Tommy: Meena's brother's loads of things but I don't reckon he'd go this hard just to get your attention Tommy: no shade honey Ali: my thoughts exactly Ali: unless he's one of those people who's ultimate fantasy is to be murdered and I'm the master criminal for the job Ali: it just isn't something you lie about, unless you're totally cracked in the head yourself Tommy: we can kink shame him later like Tommy: but you gotta hit up the IT couple with this Tommy: I can try & talk to Joe but a screen's easy to ignore if you ain't shooting up heroin so I dunno reckon my luck's out Ali: I don't even know what the hell he's gonna say Ali: but I can't just Ali: sweep that one under the rug, can I Ali: Joe was like, gone, and not in a this is a bad brain day way like a Ali: I don't know Ali: let's say there was no putting the kettle on and convincing him to stay 'til the 'rents were back, like Tommy: we can't just Tommy: I'm here for this Tommy: and you can say like a skaghead Tommy: might have to Ali: fuck Ali: how Ali: why Tommy: I dunno Tommy: who's he with Tommy: what's he do Tommy: who the fuck is he Tommy: what's he playing at Ali: all valid questions but who knows Ali: none of us Ali: it was so easy to say like, 'don't blame him' when he didn't come home ever but Ali: it's weird, we're taking like any possible excuse not to be here Tommy *~ Yeah Tommy: do you want me to come back? Ali: no Ali: you should stay there Ali: if there's an intervention I'll buy you a ticket Ali: god knows you can't be missing out on that drama Ali: but realistically Ali: you know this family, what's getting done Tommy: cheers Tommy: but you ain't told Fraze yet, you know he's done crazier than get on a plane to start shit Ali: true Ali: Jesus Tommy: if throw us & the lovebirds in a group chat that's the best it can go Tommy: she'll calm him down Ali: I truly hate this family Tommy: you & me both, Kit Tommy: Drew isn't gonna say shit is he? Ali: I don't think he would Ali: like what's he got to gain from that Tommy: like don't tell your girlfriend I said so but use your feminine wiles if you have to, yeah? Tommy: if ma finds out about this it's gonna properly wreck her Ali: that's why I'm kinda glad he left 'cos it was fucking obvious Ali: but still, what are we gonna do Ali: lock him in a cupboard legit, let him out when he's ready to behave Tommy: she lost it enough over you all summer no way she can handle this Ali: are you saying I should've done smack Ali: got my moneys worth like Tommy: I'm not not saying it Tommy: fucking hell Ali: ah a summer of regrets Ali: seriously Ali: I wanna puke Tommy: you had the best time Tommy: but summer's well and truly over now Tommy: should we pray to sexy Jesus or what Ali: yeah, put down the needle, Joe Ali: it can't hurt, we're in theory catholics so Ali: say sorry and he'll do anything for us Tommy: so out of my depth with this Tommy: this school is well straight edge and there's no religious imagery anywhere Ali: 'cos real rockstars don't go stage school, babe 💔 Ali: maybe he was just gonna smoke it? ehhh Ali: literally the best consolation I've got for any of 'em right now Tommy: I don't wanna be a rockstar honey, that's you Tommy: maybe it was for a 'friend' lol Ali: don't Ali: if he asked drew for a condom too we'd have to dash to the airport like it's love actually Tommy: I wouldn't make that boy use protection but enough about me Ali: THOMAS Ali: behave Ali: this is so serious Tommy: I'm sorry but I'm not used to the kind of gay panic where I'm a gay just panicking like Ali: if you could send me a video of you flapping your limp wrists about, so I know it's real, tah Tommy: least I can do Tommy: I'm really fucking scared, you know Tommy: like, it's Joe Ali: me too Ali: I'm not trying to be a hypocrite but it's fucking heroin Ali: like how are we at defcon1 Tommy: he's not gonna die, yeah? That's only a just say no tactic, right? Tommy: like its not cut with rat poison anymore or Tommy: whatever the fuck Ali: I mean Ali: it's a risk with all drugs but like Ali: you kill off too many punters you get a rep so let's hope his shit is clean-ish Ali: and he knows how to dose Ali: though how the fuck this is even a conversation we're having about JOE Ali: just Tommy: that's a point what did Goldilocks give him 'cause I know he ain't stocking that Tommy: ma would've kneecapped him if he was dealing that hard Tommy: shit Tommy: I dunno Tommy: how is this our real life Ali: he said, Drew, this is, that he just gave him benzos Ali: but it sounded like he got like 50 which he surely did not go through before he left Ali: so he's either got on a fucking plane with 'em or he's left an emergency stash here Ali: do I check his room like that paranoid mother or Tommy: 50 like 5 0 Tommy: Christ almighty Tommy: yeah you should before you tell Fraze Ali: like that's a months worth Ali: idk why he'd get that many just to see him through, even if Drew was being a dick and seeing how much money he could get Ali: probably wiped out his supply of, like Ali: I will Ali: watch me get the blame for them, hope he's written his name on like it's houmous in the fridge or something Tommy: this is so fucked Tommy: how big is his bastard habit Tommy: like I can't Ali: you don't think Ali: oh God oh God Ali: is he online rn hold on Tommy: you think he's Tommy: shit Ali: I'll phone him fuck this Ali: and I'm telling Fraze like, right fucking now Tommy: you have to Tommy: if it's Tommy: we're out of time Ali: okay shit, I'll stay on here to you so you ain't left in the dark but I am also on it Tommy: yeah alright Ali: [a while but not forever] Ali: made him facetime me and he was at the airport, like he said Ali: basically, there's a 'fuck school is nearly here' party so he got that many for it and he reckons 'cos he's got a prescription for 'em, he just filled up his empty box and no one's gonna know, he'd gone through so like Ali: he had got away with that Ali: he seemed more with it, genuine Ali: I dunno Ali: I wasn't getting 'phone the ambulance now' vibes from him, it was reassuring, I wouldn't bullshit you on that Ali: not when it could be so bad Tommy: fucking prick Tommy: I thought like Tommy: thank god Ali: I know Ali: he was having a fucking coffee like Ali: I don't reckon you'd go spend your last in a fucking airport, even if you were done with life Tommy: bleak wouldn't be the word Tommy: next time I see him he's dead though Ali: seriously Ali: there's still the heroin issue but Ali: at least he's not actively killing himself like right this second Tommy: are we 100% that Drew's not just a really really shitty dealer Tommy: like did he say heroin Tommy: I'm grasping at straws and I fully hear myself but Ali: sadly I don't think he's hearing the H bomb just to say he ain't got any Ali: if he had a load to shift, I'd buy it Ali: but Ali: not buy it buy it Ali: this isn't a convoluted cry for help Tommy: don't make me laugh right now Ali: soz Ali: I can't help being such a natural comedic talent Tommy: yeah yeah genius we know babe Ali: gotta milk it whilst I'm still a kid Ali: the shine really gonna dull when I hit 16 Tommy: I'm sure your girlfriend is living for your prodigy status Tommy: I'm beating the boys off (yeah also a euphemism bye) & its only hard work Ali: good for your art, I'm sure Tommy: good for me Tommy: sod my art Ali: sorry Ali: I'll be happy for you when I'm coming down from my heart attack Ali: I am Tommy: me too Tommy: no worries Tommy: we can celebrate me being a hoe any other time Ali: we will 💚 Ali: thanks for not letting me/Joe die alone though Tommy: come down one weekend with your love interest Tommy: I promise to make it super but not intimidatingly gay Tommy: kinda my thing Ali: 'sounds good man Ali: maybe Halloween, bet you do some mad gay shit Tommy: 'course Tommy: Ali, you know I love you, yeah? Tommy: like being dramatic is also my thing but I mean Ali: 'course I do Ali: I can put you down as having me as favourite too, yeah? Ali: say it back if so Tommy: obviously Tommy: Rock's cool but he can't hang like you so Ali: get in Ali: 'til his bed time is past 8pm he can suck it Ali: love you too Tom-tom Tommy: I'd love to go to bed at 8 sometimes Tommy: this school is fucking knackering Ali: I bet Ali: worth it though Ali: yeah Tommy: maybe Tommy: probably Ali: more worth it than here would be Ali: definitely Tommy: full of more fit lads definitely Tommy: at least that are out Ali: god bless Ali: can't all be turning straights Tommy: so last century Tommy: trust you to find one in the first place Tommy: everyone's got more labels than the wardrobe dept usually Ali: 😏 Ali: your bubble is gonna burst so hard man Ali: enjoy it whilst it lasts Ali: seriously Tommy: I'll blow another one it's alright Tommy: that and my own horn of course Tommy: soon as I'm out of here Ali: it's a party 🎊🎈🎆 Tommy: any and everywhere we tread honey Tommy: and you know the drill, whoever's asking I'm dancing like Ali: 👍 Ali: let you get on with all your beating now Ali: keep you in the loop vis a vis whatever the fuck is happening with this Joe thing but Ali: twiddling my thumbs 'til then so Tommy: cheers 🐱 Tommy: laters yous 💛 Ali: 💚