#i have enough of them on my own and not enough time/energy to heal you and your family too
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Indigo Child is a term that’s been around since the 1960s.
It often assigns traits and attributes of the child—attributes most likely rooted in Autism and ADHD—and claims them to be the product of special gifts such as magic or in some cases, being an alien from another planet sent to earth to guide “normal” folks to spiritual enlightenment. (That’s where starseed comes from.)
Sometimes it’s used in a throwaway term to simply mean creative and “marches to their own tune” sort of way, but when you get deeper into it, a lot of the time it was being used to deny neurodivergent kids access to mental wellness care, or even physical care.
The children are often put on an unhealthy pedestal and taught to believe that they are “special” and that the reason they struggle to fit in with their peers and to understand social norms isn’t because there is anything wrong with them, it’s because they are {insert pseudoscience new age spiritualism here.}
You’re not Autistic, Autism is bad, you’re just an old soul.
You’re not ADHD, ADHD is bad, you’re just connected to another planetary wavelength, that’s why you can’t focus on anything here on Earth.
It can become exploitative and harmful very quickly depending how far down the new age rabbit hole the adults are.
For example, my “emotional maturity” from about the age of, oh, five, was attributed by an outsider of my family to me being “an old soul” and that meant it was okay for the adults in my life to place their emotional wellbeing and stability on me, because I was secretly older than them and more emotionally advanced.
The chronic pain I started self-reporting from about the age eight or nine wasn’t actually mine, it was the manifestation of my ability to absorb the pain of others and I just needed to become more spiritually enlightened to stop feeling it. (spoiler alert it was EDS and a whole bunch of other stuff)
My trauma and my response to it, ie placating the emotionally immature adults in my life, was twisted into a positive spiritual trait that could be explained in such a way that it made it okay to exploit.
I wasn’t a traumatized child with ADHD learning to manage the emotions of people around me because it was the only way to survive—I was gifted. The universe had made me this way to teach humanity a lesson and to heal it.
I hopefully don’t need to explain how abusive and harmful this is. And regrettably, my experience was not rare. There are survivor groups for this shit and honestly sometimes when I read what other people went through and what they continued to go through (this shit makes you extremely susceptible to joining cults as an adult) I got out relatively unscathed. Traumatized and probably more disabled than I would have been had I gotten help, but nowhere near as bad as some folk.
For some people, it's simply a way of acknowledging their child is different without using a label they don't like (because ableism!)
For others its a pathway to justify serious neglect and abuse and it drives me fucking bonkers to see how quickly people are latching onto it again now that it's being repackaged as self-empowerment and wellness.
You’re not from another planet, Sharon. You’re just bad at social cues. You’re not an angel or a higher being of consciousness sent by the divine energy of the cosmos to sell essential oils. That's an MLM and you’re just another brick in the pyramid scheme.
And these scammers know that. They’re trusting that you’re vulnerable enough that you’ll keep paying to have your insecurities affirmed in a positive, often spiritual sense, usually to the detriment of your wallet, your mental health and sometimes your physical too.
You’re not struggling with the mental toll of the horrors we’re all witnessing—you just haven’t found your female archetype routine yet. 🫠
I’m taking the words “cortisol,” “dopamine addiction” and “vagus nerve reset” away from marketers and influencers and putting them on a shelf.
8K notes
·
View notes
Text
rehyperfixating on a children’s game that came out in 2015, is one of the least popular entries in its series, and has minimal content, the vast majority of which i’ve seen before. the series has been dead for nearly 10 years, nothing has happened recently that would warrant anyone’s returning interest in it, very few of my friends give a shit about this specific game, and those few who played and liked it in the past have no reason to give a shit about it at all right now. i have been coasting through on a playthrough i’ve been doing with a friend who’d never seen the game before and who was kind enough to let me show it to them, but we just beat the game, and after we play the epilogue we will have nothing left to do, and on top of that they really have just been humoring me as they have their own very strong current hyperfixation they would much rather be thinking about. also i am depressed enough right now that literally nothing else except for waiting to play this game with them and playing this game with them and watching them enjoy it at least a little has been able to briefly quiet the constant cacophony in my head screaming how much of a worthless, lazy, constantly-failing miserable excuse for a living person i am and how much better everything would be, especially for myself, if i stopped existing lately. would anyone like to volunteer to 🔨💥⚒️Kill Me With Hammers🔨💥⚒️ because i would really like for someone to 🔨💥⚒️Kill Me With Hammers🔨💥⚒️ right now
#me.txt#delete ltr#and i like hearing my friends talk about and show me their interests but it isnt enoughhhh its not enough right now to make my head SHUT UP#right now the only thing that can give me energy is a hyperfixation like this#but with enough content and engagement from others to keep subsisting me without hitting a wall#SOMETHING THAT IS EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO DO WHEN YOU CANNOT DRAW OR WRITE‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️#BECAUSE WHEN NOBODY IS MAKING ANYTHING!!!!! AND YOU CANT MAKE ANYTHING FOR YOURSELF!!!!!!!!! ALL YOU CAN DO IS CURL UP AND STARVE‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼#immmm so sick of the only thing that makes being alive feel worth it being hyperfixations theres nothing REAL tying me down i cant stand it#because i am!! too broken!!!! to ever achieve any of the things that WOULD give me a real solid tangible reason to keep living!!!!!!#like a stable job!!!! a place of my own!!! a partner whos dedicated to me above everyone else and me to them in return!!!!!!!#a LIFE that isnt just constantly failing over and over and waiting for the shoe to drop and to lose everything all over again!!!!!!!!!!!!#i dont have that!!! and i cant have that!!!!! because im too broken to be able to cultivate and maintain it!!!!!#and the only way. to fix myself enough to be able to do so.#would be to HAVE ENOUGH STABILITY THAT ID HAVE THE TIME AND ENERGY TO PUT INTO FIXING MYSELF AND HEALING#i cant fix myself without stability and freedom. and i cant get stability and freedom unless i’m fixed#so it is. literally impossible!!!!!!!#impossible to create my own concrete solid reason to be here.#impossible for me to even create anything to feed the fixations that are my backup reasons.#theres nothing!! nothing!!! i have nothing new to leap to and ive been dwindling for too long and i think i am about to drown#im just waiting for time to tick out. for me to fuck up too badly to come back from one last time and get found out and punished.#and then? theres nothing left. theres literally nothing else left for me
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫
it’s a hard pill to swallow, but sometimes, you’ve got to step into a role you never signed up for. maybe your mom wasn’t the nurturing, protective figure she was supposed to be. maybe your dad let you down in ways that left scars. maybe your friends only stuck around to take, never to give. the truth? you can’t wait for someone to come and save you. you have to become your own mother.
ask yourself:
if your child was in your shoes—stuck in a bad relationship, getting treated like crap— would you tell them, “stay”? or would you say, “you deserve better than this”?
if your child was chasing their dreams but struggling, would you mock them? no. you’d guide them, push them to be their best. you’d discipline them with love and cheer them on with pride. now, apply that same energy to yourself.
be that mom who says: “get your shit together because you deserve the best life possible.”
but also the mom who says: “it’s okay to rest, i’ve got your back, and i’m proud of you.”
start showing up for yourself the way you needed someone to show up for you. and yes, it’s sad. sad that we even have to do this. but it’s also empowering to realize you can.
personally, here’s my story.
my mom never cared to take my pictures as a kid nor cared if a haircut made me happy or not, it was literally everything up to her convenience. it hurts now because i would’ve loved to look back and see those memories. but i don’t have them. i can count the photos of my childhood—20 pictures in 17 years. insane, right? so, i made a promise to myself: from now on, i will document my life. i won’t delete my photos. i’ll make sure there’s a record of who i was, what i felt, what i achieved. and when i have kids? you bet i’ll take pictures of them. i’ll curate their childhood with care because i know what it feels like to not have that.
but being your own mother isn’t just about the pictures or the memories. it’s about analyzing everything you missed out on and providing it for yourself now. it’s about being selfless enough to let go of bad habits that hold you back. it’s about kicking toxic people out of your life the way a mom would protect her child from bad influences. it’s about prioritizing your healing, even if it’s messy and uncomfortable. you have to heal your inner child. that 5-year-old who was bullied, that 13-year-old who was treated like shit in her first relationship, that 7-year-old who dreamed big but was told she couldn’t they’re all still inside you, waiting for someone to nurture them. and unfortunately, no one else is going to do it for you. no one else is going to come and fix the damage.
i made a pact with myself: when i have kids, i will raise them so well that they won’t ever need to “heal their inner child” at 17 or 18. they’ll be whole. they’ll be loved. they’ll know their worth from the start. but for now, i’m doing that for myself. and you need to do it for yourself too. because at the end of the day, the only way to heal is to become the person you needed all along. become your own mother.
what is the inner child?
the “inner child” is the part of you that holds your early experiences, memories, and emotions. it’s the 5-year-old you who loved to laugh but was scolded for being “too much.” it’s the 10-year-old you who dreamed big but felt dismissed. it’s the teen you who felt heartbreak for the first time but didn’t know how to process it. your inner child carries the wounds, fears, and unmet needs from your past, but also your natural creativity, curiosity, and joy. healing your inner child means reconnecting with this version of yourself, giving it the love and understanding it never received, and releasing the pain it has carried for years.
how do you heal your inner child?
1. journaling: dialogue with your inner child
dedicate a journal specifically to your inner child. write letters to them, like:
“dear [your name at 5/7/13], i remember when you felt [insert memory]. i’m sorry you went through that, but i’m here now, and i’ve got you.”
let your inner child respond. write as if you’re that younger version of yourself—pour out your fears, dreams, and questions. this process can uncover emotions and patterns you didn’t realize were affecting you.
2. therapy: safe exploration with a professional
a therapist (especially one trained in inner child work) can help you identify wounds and patterns from childhood. they’ll guide you in understanding how your upbringing shaped your beliefs about yourself and the world. therapy also gives you tools to reframe those beliefs and meet your emotional needs.
watch “dear zindagi” lol
3. look at old photos and memories
revisit old photos, journals, or artwork from your childhood. don’t just look at them—analyze them. (i wish i could d this but im stuck with 20 photos so… 😭) what do you notice in your younger self’s eyes, body language, or expression?
• ask yourself:
• what was i feeling here?
• did i feel safe? loved? excited? scared?
• what did i need in this moment that i didn’t get?
• use this reflection to understand your inner child’s unmet needs.
4. create new positive memories
your inner child is still alive within you, and they crave fun, love, and freedom. do things your younger self would’ve loved but never got to do: buy yourself a toy you always wanted. go to an amusement park or build a pillow fort. dance around your room like no one’s watching. this isn’t childish it’s healing.
5. practice reparenting
treat yourself as if you were your own child. when you feel sad or scared, don’t ignore it.
ask yourself: what do i need right now? and give it to yourself.
be the loving, supportive, and protective parent your inner child deserved.
6. identify triggers and patterns
notice when you’re acting out of a place of childhood wounds.
for example: do you get overly anxious when someone’s mad at you? do you seek validation in toxic relationships? trace these behaviors back to your childhood.
were you taught that love is conditional? did you have to “earn” attention by being perfect? once you identify the root, you can start rewiring your responses.
7. inner child meditations and visualizations
find a quiet space and imagine your inner child sitting across from you. visualize yourself comforting them, hugging them, and telling them they’re safe. remind them: “you don’t have to be scared anymore. i’m here for you.”
8. nurture yourself daily
make self-care non-negotiable. eat foods you love, sleep well, move your body, and spend time doing things that make you happy. when you treat yourself with care, you show your inner child they’re worth it.
9. forgive
healing isn’t about excusing those who hurt you. it’s about releasing the hold they have over you so you can move forward. write a forgiveness letter—not for them, but for yourself. (they don’t deserve the love i’m sorry)
“i release the pain you caused me so it doesn’t control me anymore.”
10. promise to break the cycle
vow to yourself (and your future children if you want them) just cause your grandma bleed on your mom and then your mom passed it to you does not mean you will make your future kids life miserable too. the generational trauma must break with you. your future child does not deserve it and so your inner child protect you inner child and when you have a child of your own be the best mother possible, i personally would love to make my future kids childhood so memorable and happy that they will feel the need to comeback and relive their childhood that’s the kind of childhood i want to give them
“i will not let this pain define me. i will create a life of love, joy, and freedom.”
healing your inner child isn’t easy, but it’s life-changing.when you reconnect with that innocent, wounded part of yourself, you’ll find that the love and peace you’ve been searching for has always been within you.
11. foster your inner child’s dreams
when you were a child, your dreams weren’t influenced by fear, rejection, or societal pressures. you dreamed with your heart wide open, purely and authentically. reconnecting with those dreams can heal the part of you that felt unheard or invalidated back then.
a. reflect on your childhood aspirations
• sit down and ask yourself:
• what did i want to be when i was 5? 10? 13?
• what made me happiest back then?
• what did i lose interest in because someone told me i wasn’t good enough?
• write down every dream, no matter how “unrealistic” it seems.
hint: those childhood dreams often point to your soul’s calling.
b. start chasing those dreams now
• even if your dreams have evolved, find ways to honor the essence of them.
• wanted to be a singer at 13? start singing lessons or recording yourself.
• wanted to help people? explore careers like psychology, teaching, or coaching.
• don’t hold back.
it’s not about being perfect, it’s about reconnecting with the passion your younger self had.
c. create small wins for your inner child
• maybe 8-year-old you always wanted to paint but never got the supplies. buy yourself a beginner’s set and paint, even if it’s messy.
• maybe 6-year-old you wanted to be a dancer. take a fun dance class and twirl like no one’s watching.
• small wins send the message to your inner child that they are finally being prioritized.
e. validate your inner child’s feelings and failures
• remind yourself:
“it’s okay that 10-year-old me struggled with making friends. i was just a child trying my best.”
• instead of shaming yourself for past actions, honor them.
every mistake was a step toward becoming the incredible person you are now.
f. use your dreams to shape your future
• your childhood passions aren’t just hobbies—they’re roadmaps to your authentic self.
• align your current goals with your inner child’s desires.
• if 7-year-old you dreamed of making people smile, maybe your career or side hustle should reflect that.
• if 12-year-old you loved storytelling, find ways to write, act, or share your voice.
fostering your inner child’s dreams doesn’t just heal the past—it builds a future that feels authentic to you. every time you take a step toward those dreams, you’re telling your inner child: “you were always worthy. your dreams always mattered. and now, i’m making them come true for you.”
#manifesting#manifestation#love#long hair#levelling up#girlblogging#flowers#empowerment#dream life#aesthetic#inner child#inner peace#innerstrength#level up#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#tumblr girls#that girl#girlhood#glow up#grabovoi code#strong mentality#mental health#self love#love yourself#female manipulator#positivity#positive mental attitude#positive thoughts#woman empowerment#empoweryourself
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
❃Astrology observations❃
Masterlist
Not a real astrologer just my observations:)
❃ Aquarius moon femmes tend to be more masculine/tomboyish whether it be their personality or fashion sense they prefer loose fitting clothes. They have this nonchalantness/offstandish energy about them, they also are very sensitive and receptive to energies around them esp after one on one interactions but surprisingly do very well w online interactions💀they could feel like their personality shines brighter online than irl
❃ 12th ruler in 7th natal partners could have animosity towards you esp if you prefer men they tend to have secret intentions/lives
❃ Sagittarius in your natal chart is where you tell the best stories, and gemini can show where others ask for advice/tell their best stories to you(and lowkey try to impress you)
♐︎ in 1st -you ARE the story, there’s never a dull moment ,so many memories are made w you, many stories where you had to be reminded that your that GIRL/GUY✨ (esp by your guides)
♐︎ in 8th- they articulate their trauma very well, the ones that talk openly about their abuse, lots of near-death stories, surgery stories that they almost didn’t make it out of, thieving stories
♐︎ in 11th- the type to bring their friends into every situation/story, most likely to do the best story time vids online, their stories can be eye opening for the collective, people love when they predict the future, stories about the future/goals of humanity, evolution stories, stories about you gaining independence(just like 1st)
♐︎ in 12th- they love to hear about your dreams and conspiracies, they love when you talk about your insecurities and spill your own secrets, your paranormal experiences and things about past lives
♊︎ in 2nd- they love to tell you how hard they work for their assets, “You know I haven’t told anyone this but I feel like I can trust you.” They don’t mind telling you about their illegal activities, people have a tendency to think you took something from them, they come to you for advice on how to approach situations
♊︎ in 5th- the type to have kids come up to them and all their parents business (4th house also), the best childhood memory stories, people try to impress you w their sex stories , they come to you for advice on sex and love matters also, asking for your opinion w fashion & aesthetics, you make them want to try new things🥵
❃ Taurus in the 3rd/4th find it hard to leave their family/home
Cancer risings (4°16°28°) their face and body fluctuate through life but their faces tend to get rounder/fuller as they age
❃ Sending love out to Venus in Pisces/12th house natals y’all are what fairytales are made of🥺 just being in your presence is healing even tho they feel sometimes their deepness and devotion isn’t reciprocated at times idk who needed to hear this but your loving energy transcends the physical barriers you could do a lot of energy work on the other side w/o even realizing it esp while sleeping🧡
❃ I feel bad for Chloe because w that Gemini mars baby everybody always gonna think you doing too much😭 unti you don’t do enough & they’ll still be mad
Finding out Lil uzi has a Gemini mars sent me💀 it reminds of them vids of their security guard trying to keep up w them while they jump all over the place🕺🏽
❃ Sag moon children mom was in her hoe phase when u were conceived. Partying/traveling/drinking/learning was prominent for her at the time
Venus in natal can show you why others envy you
♀ in 2nd- they envy how consistently you upkeep yourself, they see how much money you put into yourself to look good, they hate how materially abundant you are, how easily you make money from your talents/assets, they envy your sugar daddy/baby energy
♀ in 4th- they envy how abundant your family/ancestry is, they envy your mom/your motherly skills, how easily you make a house feel like home, how rich your inner world is, your decoration sense, how easily you’ll be remembered after passing/leaving home, how easily you make money from home
♀ in 8th- they envy how easily others trust you esp w their money & possessions, how beautifully you shed your skin in transformations, sugarbaby placement, how magnetic you are, how easily people become obsessed w you, your way of love making/showing love/spoiling others or vise versa
♀ in 12th- a lot of people don’t even realize that they envy you/ subconsciously send you evil eye, you provoke their hidden desires(this place def has lots of people in their circle wishing on their downfall) they envy how content you are with yourself /and how you’ve healed yourself , your music taste
I feel like prominent Pisces placements tend to lose their teeth more often than Capricorns, could also have dreams of teeth falling out/rotting
❃ Prominent Virgo in natal stay cleaning up other people’s 💩💀 like literally tho at some point in your life you’ve had to be some type of caretaker ie. animals, elderly, babies. But 💩 is more prominent/consistent in your life
But if ur a pet owner or caretaker in general you know that a lot of times the only way they can communicate what’s going on w their body Is through their bowel movements so it’s a blessing and a curse cuz it’s not like your obsessed with 💩 (unless👀) but you kinda have to be😭
Aphrodite in Gemini/3rd house natals have contagiously attractive laughs/smiles, delicate hand and arm movements, and beautiful hands and lips
❃ Every time I have prominent 8th synastry esp moon/mars we always have 🩸 sex eventually 🧍🏽♀️ they be feigning so bad for you that they can’t wait a few more days they need it now! But they always end up saying you put a spell on them like no bro u willingly put a spell on YOURSELF💀
❃ 7th house mercury could attract or prefer younger/pettie people or they are seen as such, also prone to have partners w prominent anxiety
❃ Eros/mars in Aries/cancer/scorpio in composite charts shows lots of crying during sex but for different reasons
Aries cries because ur f*cking/sucking them so good all they can do is take it like a champ and cry happy tears 🥲
Cancer cries because you truly touched their soul🥺 they never thought sex could be this satisfying and comforting at the same time (healing sex like Pisces)
With scorpio it’s kinda a mixture of both w sprinkles of trauma bonding✨
❃ Venus in 8th synastry- adoring eachothers beauty marks esp the house person @ Venus , the house person usually adores the Venus’s insecurities/stuff about themselves that they never picked up on which gives the Venus person a new prospective of their beauty
❃ Mercury synastry can tell you how you were first introduced/heard of each other
☿ in 8th- meeting while/before going through a transformational/traumatic period in your life, you could have problems w people owing you money or vise versa, catalyst for spiritual & sexual growth, meeting before/after having a major surgery
☿ in 9th- meeting through college/highschool,being introduced to/by a different ethnicity friend,meeting while traveling esp abroad, catalyst in spiritual journey, meeting through religious community
☿ in 4th- I have this w my mom while her ☿ is in my 1st so you could also share this w your parents, w cancer and Aries basically representing the womb her PUMPUM told her about me😂obvi she had no other choice but to learn about me I was coming weather she liked it or not😎 so w 1st house synastry I feel like they were kinda forced onto you they’re pretty hard to miss🥴with 4th her aunts/women in her family told her she was gonna have another baby before she even knew🤷🏽♀️
❃ Jupiter in 1st synastry -even the most stubborn person would hear planet person out w this placement 😏 Jupiter boost house persons ego/outlook on life, planet person just makes everything look good & exciting in house person eyes
❃ Pluto in 11th natal- unfriending someone could really feel like a divorce lmao telling people your not friends anymore and they react so crazy like “NO I NEVER WOULDVE THOUGHT💔💔💔” then splittng up your assets (friends/aspirations)
❃ Gemini Venus-girl next door vibe people watch through your window esp w some Pluto energy on your Venus, the song ‘She by Tyler the creator’ was made about us fr😭
❃ Taurus (2°14°26°)moons people think that they own you or that you’re some object they can use anytime they want whether it be your body or your possessions
Also having a Taurus moon could play out as feeling like you didn’t get the support that you needed in ur childhood, the type to have moms that say “I put clothes on your back, food on your plate, and a pillow to lay your head and you’re telling me I didn’t do enough for you??😠😤” like sorry I needed emotional support and understanding as a child that you couldn’t give me🥲 the mom could see the child as spoiled/ungrateful esp with harsh aspects on the moon, but they could also just feel like they have a right to your possessions esp if you live in the same house what is privacy?😀
❃ 6th house synastry is big on planning together,the type to count down the days till they get to see e/o 🥰
Now offering aura & synastry readings
That’s it for now, have a blessed day ✨
#follow for more#astro observations#capricorn#astro#fill my ask box#composite chart#composite#synastry#astrology transits#synastry chart#Jupiter#cancer#scorpio#8th house#1st house#12th house#Gemini#gemini venus#Taurus#aphrodite#sextrology
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
I don't want to be friends with my friends anymore.
I don't want to be in a relationship with my boyfriend anymore.
I don't want to smoke anymore.
I don't want to do anything that isn't entirely full of love. So much love.
I want to be around my family, people that I love and care about and know for certain deep in my heart care about me so much and hold nothing but my best intentions. I want my life to be so full of love and peace and care and to not have to constantly question people's intentions... I want my baby to be constantly reminded that she has a safe space within our incredible family that will always be here for her when life inevitably gets tough.
I want to spend quality time with my daughter and take her to things that she's interested in. I want her to absolutely thrive and have incredible memories from her childhood. I want to be able to look back at a catalogue of good times when I'm doubting myself as reassurance that we are doing okay; I am good enough.
I want to progress in my career and work towards my long term goals, and I want to continue enjoying the challenges and rewards of doing so. I want to be an asset to the team and to be able to make a positive difference in the lives of the people that I see. I want to make a difference.
I want to be my best self.
#i always feel like i alone am not enough for Hollie but i know that my family go above and beyond and together we are more than enough#i am so blessed and am ignoring so many of my blessings and for what#its time now#the next chapter has begun#i dont want to be friends with my NEW friends anymore should clarify my oldest friends arent going anywhere i love those bitches but#ive made some bad friend choices recently and am letting them walk all over me as they please but its getting me down sm#and theyre constantly sniffing coke like its 4 oclock on a thursday mate you have a problem#i have enough of them on my own and not enough time/energy to heal you and your family too#at the end of the day ima single mum working full time (+ extra hours) so my free time is limited and precious#i need to prioritise whats important otherwise it just feels like wasted time#i need to love myself again#and stop putting my entire self worth in the hands of other people#i want a small circle. super teeny tiny.#ramble ramble
0 notes
Text
What you want to hear Vs What you need to hear
Warning: This reading can and will be extremely blunt and a little harsh. Viewer discretion is advised.
DISCLAIMER: Take what resonates and leave what doesn't. If you are seeing this, you were meant to see it. How you take these readings and what you choose to do with them is entirely up to you.
If you need any extra help, a place to talk and heal, somewhere to just scream into the void, feel free to reach out!
Pile 1
What you want to hear:
It's going to be easy, it'll come to you naturally. What is yours will always come to you and will never pass you. All you have to do is be in a receiving energy.
What you need to hear:
So- here’s the thing, don’t fault yourself for believing this. Many tarot readers would often say these same few things creating a false sense of security, a false sense of hope. The truth us, none of us ever really considered just how much work is put into our dreams, our goals, bringing them into reality. That’s why it’s easier to fantasize about it, dream about that golden opportunity falling into our laps. Now I won’t be the one to say it doesn’t happen like that- but I will have to say, it’s very rare. The thing is, the universe only presents you what you are prepared for, and you have to really question whether or not you are actually prepared to handle the weight of your dreams.
We think about all of the nice feelings, the good times, the positive sides to our goals but never do we truly consider the weight, the gravitas of the negative aspects of our goals and this is where you, my dear reader are currently at. There are a lot of hidden aspects in this world, things that people wouldn’t consider and I hope this exercise can help you come to terms with what you are truly asking for. Can you handle the physical workload, numerous late nights? What about your mental health? Are you capable of expressing yourself or are you shoving your pain deep down until they explode? What about your physical health? Are you eating enough? Staying hydrated?
Every aspect of this goal of yours needs to be analyzed. What skills will you need for when you achieve your goal? Work on those. It's going to take a lot of actual effort, a lot of work and it will not be easy at every step but it will get easier and be worth it. You have to put in the physical work, but also the mental and emotional work to be able to handle those negative aspects. Heavy is the head that wears the crown and your head is heavy, but you will succeed if you put in the actual work from the moment you see this.
Pile 2
What you want to hear:
You lover is coming in, just around the corner, maybe in a few days, your true twin flame.
What you need to hear:
Let it go, it isn't going to happen because you aren't doing what you're supposed to be doing and taking yourself and your life seriously, you are living in a fantasy, living in your head and waiting for a knight in shining armour and it’s not gonna happen. You are severely neglecting your life, your health, your mental well being because it is easier to live in the delusion that it is to face reality. It’s like you wake up, check out of life for the day to live in your head with prince/princess charming, and then clock back in at night to dream about your perfect fantasy person. Well, because of that, they aren’t coming in.
They are not going to come in because you cannot handle it. You cannot bear the concept, or even fathom what it would actually be like because you’ve convinced yourself it will happen in only one specific way. Listen, you don’t even have the emotional maturity to handle your dream relationship, you will 100% sabotage your own relationship because you wouldn’t even know how to appreciate it being right in front of you and will choose to live within your daydreams even if they were in your face. You will not be grateful, you won’t have gratitude, you won’t be able to pull yourself from the fantasy that you live in your head enough to actually pursue this person. The universe does not give you what you want just because you want it, you have to work for it, show the universe that this is something you can manage because it’s not about you. Especially since it’s not about you. Have you thought about how your future person would feel? This isn’t to get you to be self conscious in your flaws and insecurities, it’s to get you to face the real world and face reality and start being the person you wish to be in those dreams. The universe will not plop your person on your door step because the universe wants whats best for you and your person. Your person deserves to be noticed and loved as much as you dream about them loving you. If you cannot handle actually having a relationship, the universe will not give you one. You have to do your shadow work, you need to heal your wounds, you have to stop avoiding the real world because you’re dooming yourself to chasing a fantasy that will not come. This is dangerous because it is truly bordering on the level of spiritual psychosis here, pull back before it’s too late.
Pile 3
What you want to hear:
You are wealthy, You are rich, You are that bitch.
What you need to hear:
You can be a little bit of a pompous bitch and you need to tone it down. These affirmations are sending you down a path of delusional grandiose view of yourself, you need actual affirmations and not lies. You can't fuel yourself on coffee and crystals. Lol, let me tone it down a bit. The affirmations you are doing are- ok, but they are subpar. They barely scratch the surface, it’s like trying to go deep sea fishing but using a hook with a buoy attached to it. You are barely getting deep enough to get that fish, leaving you starving.
Take some time to sit with yourself, what is it that you are struggling in? What are you avoiding, what is the feeling you are trying to suppress with these affirmations? Let's do an exercise, your affirmation of choice is “I am rich”, the reason why you are saying it is to affirm to yourself and to also manifest financial wealth, but why? Maybe you are struggling to pay your bills, maybe you have debt you wish to pay off. Telling yourself you are rich is not helping, it’s not affirming anything, it’s lying to yourself. Words are powerful, the brain itself, cannot tell a joke from the truth therefore it will believe whatever we think to be fact and if you believe that you are rich without the funds to back it up, you are creating a dangerous dynamic of you overspending because you believe you are rich and can afford it. This is dramatised to emphasise the point.
If you want to actually manifest financial abundance, you have to have the mindfulness to handle it as well. Why do you think when people will the lottery they blow all of their money so quickly? Because when you go without for so long, living in survival mode for so long, the adrenaline of not having to worry overrides everything and you end up buying everything you’ve ever wanted until you have nothing left, now you are back at square one and probably in an even worse position. You have to affirm the mindfulness, instead of saying “i am rich” say “I am resourceful, I am abundant, I receive wealth infinitely” This not only calls the wealth to you, but it sets the notion that you are mindful and know how to wield that sword. You can’t be “that bitch” by lying to yourself, you can’t copy the look and vibe of Regina George and go around acting like her and call yourself Regina because you aren’t her, you’re copying her, you don’t actually have what she has. Find a way to actually make it yourself.
Pile 4
What you want to hear:
You are doing so well, you are doing amazing and nothing needs to change
What you need to hear:
Go eat a fucking bagel, put some food in your stomach and drink some water before you pass out and meet god. You are doing well in many aspects except for self care. Self care is not just running a bath with nice smelling bombs and cute candles and a cup of tea, self care is treating yourself like a human that is deserving of living, act like you are a parent to your body and see what I mean. Choose yourself bitch. you spend your days fantasizing about fancy foods only to eat a small bag of chips and call it a day. nourish yourself.
You are quite literally running on fumes and I’m surprised you even have enough cognitive capability to pick a pike and read this message. You cannot keep overworking yourself, under-nourishing yourself and expect things to be great for you. How the hell are you supposed to receive an award and give your thank you speech if you can barely hold your eyes open long enough to see where you are. I know you want to be successful, I know you want to experience the wealth and stability, but what use is any of it if you can’t even allow yourself to enjoy it? It is okay to take a nap, it is okay to rest yourself, it is okay to have an off day, it is okay to be bored, it is okay to do nothing. You don’t have to constantly be on your feet, always be doing something to earn the right to existence. You need to find the calm in the slow, find the calm in just existing and being you. You truly do not need to be doing a million and one things, it’s truly okay to be bored because boredom spurs creativity. How do you think we were able to create all of the things we have in this world? How they discovered cheese, how they created music? Because they had nothing else to do.
You can take a break right now and I promise you your life will not fall apart. This is not your cue to go and doom scroll on tiktok, instagram, twitter, shit even reddit. This is your cue to sit in silence, maybe a little bit of classical music and have a cup of tea, a bagel, a croissant, an espresso martini if you’re a fancy bitch and relax. Take a nap, do some soothing yoga, take a break from the grind culture, take a break from being productive, take a break from being stuck in the cogs of capitalism. Go out with friends, take a walk, something where you can experience the slowness of life and enjoy the world around you rather than zooming so fast through things. I see you moving so quickly through life that you don’t even stop to enjoy the beauty that is being alive.
Secret Pile 5
You know this pile is for you if: You are seeing this pile, were drawn to one or more pile, or couldn't choose a pile to begin with but still wanted to see the piles.
What you want to hear:
That career wants you too, that job wants you too, that person wants you too, the life you dream about wants you too
What you need to hear:
That career wants you too, that job wants you too, that person wants you too, the life you dream about wants you too. The things that you desire wants you too.
It is a hard world we are living in and sometimes we struggle to find the will to live, to believe that things will be better for us, to find the motivation to keep chasing our goals and our dreams. Here's the thing, the universe will always reward effort, and you are doing the best you can with what you have and the thing about the best is that there is always room for improvement. You know deep down what you must do in order to call in your dream life. You know if you want that dream person you have to heal your trauma. You know if you want that career you have to heal your fear of being perceived. The life that want you, wants you too because that life wants to exist too and it cannot exist without you at the center however, you cannot be superman without the superman powers. Your dream life, your dream person, your dream career, everything that you ever want are tied to you, and they are tied to the best version of you. The best version of you is the most authentic, healthy (mentally, emotionally), the most bold and audacious you.
You may feel discouraged, you may feel like giving up, but you've got this. Your future self wants you to keep going, to see where they are, to look back at what you've made, to be proud of yourself, and for you to experience the life the two of you created. You are doing this for your younger self and guess what? Your future self is doing this for you. The things you face, are lessons to learn, to make the experiences of the future easier to handle.
#tarot#pac reading#pac tarot#pac#intuitive readings#intuitive guidance#intuitive messages#spiritual journey#spirituality#pick a card reading#pick a picture#pick a card tarot#pick a card#pick a deck#I made this in November and forgot to post it omfg 💀
560 notes
·
View notes
Text
Don't hide from me || Logan Howlett x Reader
summary: You get hurt on a mission and hide it from Logan. Safe to say he is not happy with you.
warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, talk of violence, blood, and injury
wc: 3k
a/n: Hi guys, tw for pet death but we had to put my childhood dog to sleep today. He was 16 and he had a good life but it's rough. Writing has always helped me so I just sat down and wrote today. I'm always a sucker for this kind of trope and I also have trouble asking for help so this was born. Idk if I like the ending but I always struggle with those so oopsie
This was not how you imagined your first mission to go. You had assumed it would be easy, boring in fact. It was supposed to be boring. Maybe a little fighting here or there but nothing serious.
Well you were sorely mistaken. Your hand puts pressure on your side as you lean against a tree. The rough bark digging into the cuts on your suit. You wince as you look down to see a massive gash right in your stomach.
"Fuck." Your breath is labored as you slowly slide down the tree. You don't heal like some of the other mutants can. In fact your powers were relatively tame compared to others but you were still an asset to the team.
You had been training for months and months. Learning to control your sparks into blasts of energy and manipulate the electricity around you. You had never been more excited to receive your suit. Handed to you by Logan himself after your final training day.
The proud look on his face made your whole body fill with butterflies. Logan had been your biggest help. He was a very distracting teacher though due to the fact that he's your boyfriend too but if anything that made him push you harder.
"Come on sweetheart, you need to do better than that." He says with a smirk. He's barely broken a sweat while you've been giving it a hundred and ten percent.
"Fuck off." You huff as you lay down on the mat. Body exhausted from the hours of training.
"You're getting better. Just need to keep working." He steps over you, bending down and holding out his hand.
"One more time and we're done." He helps you up and kisses your forehead. Walking back to his spot he raises his arms and braces himself.
"Hit me." Taking a deep breath you channel all your power to your fingertips. Feeling the jolts of power start to form. With all your strength you fire right at Logan. To your surprise it hits him square in the chest and sends him flying into the wall.
"Logan!" You run over to him but he's already up by the time you make it. A big smile on his face as he wraps his arms around you. A burst of pride in your chest as he kisses you sweetly.
"I knew you could do it."
It made it even sweeter when you were finally deemed ready to join them. You were ready. You wanted to prove to all of them that you could do it but most of all you wanted to show Logan.
Show him that all his extra training helped and that you were strong and you could do this on your own. He had always shown a slight worry about you joining the team. He says it's because he's worried and protective but a small part of your brain tells you it's because he thinks you can't do it. That you're not ready.
So this. Well it almost felt embarrassing. The mission was nothing new to the rest of the team but to you it was overwhelming. Fighting with everything you had and sometimes it felt like it wasn’t enough. You took out soldier after soldier but they kept coming. But you were fine. You never asked for backup. Convincing yourself that you could do this. Thinking back to all your long days in the simulation and wiping away any doubt that lingered in your head.
Logan had left your side early on much to his reluctance so you were on your own. You were too focused on the guy in front of you that you didn't notice the man sneaking behind you. You cried out in pain as he dug his knife into your side.
Without thinking you blast him far away, taking out the guy in front of you too. Pure adrenaline courses through you as you run to safety. Now you're here, the sounds of fighting still rage on behind you. Blood is seeping onto your hand at a faster rate than normal.
"Okay. Okay. Okay okay." Sorry Professor but you'll fix your suit later. Your sleeve was already torn so you tear the rest as much of it as you can off. Turning it into one long strip of fabric. You unzip the top of your suit to get to the wound. They briefly taught you how to patch up injuries more akin to scratches not stab wounds. You tie the fabric tightly around your waist. You groan as the pressure shoots a sharp pain through your body. The sounds of fighting were dying down.
You know you should tell someone but the last thing you wanted was to be taken off the team after your first mission. You wanted to make them proud. You loved being on the team.
The injury isn't that bad, if you could just make it back to the mansion you would be fine. Patch it up with the right material and then sleep it off. Thank god you and Logan didn't share a room. Fuck. Logan. He was going to kill you but what he didn't know won't hurt him.
Just this once.
Zipping up your suit again you take a few deep breaths to calm yourself. Just make it back to the mansion. You walk as best you can back to the jet. Your limping, favoring your non injured side and it's incredibly obvious. Still you put a smile on your face. The team clocks your ripped sleeve immediately. Logan scowls as you get closer making you shiver. Or maybe that was from the blood loss.
"So how was that for your first mission?" Scott beams as he walks over to you. He slaps his hand onto your shoulder and you wince.
"Good. Is it always like this?" He notices something's off but doesn't say anything. Instead he keeps his hand on your shoulder as he guides you back to the jet.
"You alright Sparks? What happened to your suit." He asks when you get closer.
"Long story, some guy ripped it and when I ran to the forest it got caught and just. tore away." You lie right through your teeth.
"Don't worry we'll fix it when we get back." Ororo smiles and you thank god they bought it. Well almost everyone bought it.
As you head up the ramp you feel a hand on your side. Your whole body tenses as pain shoots through your side. You bite your lip hard to keep yourself from screaming. You recognize the hand as Logan's as his wide chest bumps against your back.
"You alright sweetheart?" He asks, a skeptical look on his face as you wave his hand off.
"Yeah, just really tired." You sigh as you sit in a chair.
Some relief spreads through your body as you subtly press the arm of the chair into your side. Putting more pressure as you feel the blood soak through your makeshift bandage. He narrows his eyes as he inspects you like an animal. Your heart picks up as he places both hands on either arm rest, caging you in as he leans close.
"What are you doing?" You shrink under his intense look. He sniffs and a low growl emits from his throat.
"I smell blood. Somethings wrong." Fuck. He's caught you. The rest of the team starts to file back in.
"Yeah there's blood on everyone's suit, there's blood on you." You mumble as an excuse.
"Down boy, we're taking off so take a seat." Scott says. Logan stays put for just a moment longer before he finally backs off, flipping Scott the middle claw as he takes the seat behind you.
You can feel his eyes burning in the back of your head the whole flight home. You were sweating, body on fire as you focused on your breathing. The pain was getting worse and you wanted to cry for help. But you were determined to prove yourself here.
Your brain wasn't exactly working right either. Too focused on not throwing up to think logically. Finally the jet lands. You're so close. Just a little longer. Logan moves to go right back to your side but gets pulled away. You can vaguely hear him telling someone to fuck off as you stumble out of the jet.
You feel like a zombie as you walk back to your room. Stomach growing sick as you struggle to stay awake. Sweat pours down your face, body screaming for help as you barely make it to your room. Your vision goes in and out. The darkness calling to you as you swing open your door. That sounds nice, you can just close your eyes and sleep. Yeah. Then you can fix yourself up. Your vision goes black. The last thing you remember is someone yelling your name.
-
The first thing you notice when you come back to consciousness is how much your body hurts. The second thing was the hand that was holding yours tightly. Clearly you weren't in your room anymore. This bed is too uncomfortable and it smells too much like antiseptic.
The lab. You were in a hospital bed in the lab which means that someone found you which can only mean that Logan knew and you were in so much trouble. Maybe if you keep your eyes closed you can just go back to sleep. The urge to avoid the consequences of your actions was strong but you knew you couldn't. You lied and now you have to deal with it.
Surprisingly it's dim when you open your eyes. The ugly florescent lighting was off in favor of a few candles and a soft lamp. The hand holding yours twitched, holding you tighter. Looking to your side you see Logan laying his head on the bed. Guilt seeps into your soul when you see him there.
"Glad to see you awake." A soft voice says from the door.
"Jean." You sheepishly say. She flicks on the lights and you squint your eyes at the bright light.
"You're lucky that Logan found you when he did." Her voice is gentle but there's anger hidden behind it.
"I'm sorry. I thought." You sigh and look at Logan who was still sleeping.
"I thought I could handle it. I just wanted to be one of you guys." "You already were one of us, but we're just glad you're okay." She checks your vitals once more in silence.
"Am I in trouble?" You ask nervously.
"Yes." Another voice makes your heart jump, the monitor picking it up with a massive spike.
"Logan honey I-" He holds up his hand and silently asks Jean to leave. She gives you one last smile before leaving the two of you alone.
"Don't. Don't you dare." You shrink into the bed as speaks.
"What the hell were you thinking?"
"I-"
"Hiding a fucking stab wound? For what? Exactly what did you think would happen here!" He raises his voice and you look down in shame.
"You are benched. Permanently." He growls, standing up and storming towards the door.
"What! Logan you can't do that."
"Fuck yes I can. Do you understand how stupid it was for you to hide an injury like that? How irresponsible you were!"
"I thought I could handle it!" The machines near you started to go haywire as you yelled back.
"I thought you were dead!" You go silent as the anger fades, he clenches his fists tightly.
"I smelled the blood and I knew something was wrong. The whole time I knew it. There was a trail of blood to your room and I ran and ran and when I finally got there." He pauses. Not even wanting to say the next thought.
"I'm sorry." You whisper.
You reach out for him but he just stares at you. A painful expression on his face as his eyes zero in on the prominent scar on your side. He shakes his head, turning away and walking out the door.
"Logan please." You beg for him to come back but he doesn't.
The lab is silent and lonely. Jean comes back to check on you, comforting you as you silently cry. All you want is for Logan to come back but he never did.
At least not while you were awake. In the mornings there were traces of Logan. His jacket is left on your bed the one you always steal to cuddle with. Snacks are waiting by your table. Little things to show you had still been there. Just not when you were awake.
It was only a couple days later that you were finally discharged. The Professor had called you to his office, letting you know that you were benched until you had fully recovered and you nodded in understanding. You can feel the stares of the rest of the mansion on you as you walk back to your room.
You've apologized over and over to the team and they welcomed you back with open arms. Begging you to never scare them like that again. Your mind wanders and your feet seem to think on their own as you find yourself in front of Logan's door.
All you want is for him to hold you and to tell you it's okay. Before you can knock on the door it swings open. There he stands in all his glory. He stares at you for a moment before pulling you into a hug. It takes you by surprise but you hug him back tighter. You wince as he pushes a little too hard on your side and he lets go instantly. You don't want to let go, he's been gone for days and you need him.
"I'm here to apologize." You say.
"I'm sorry for not saying anything. I was afraid that you would think I'm weak." It hurts to admit but he needs to know the truth. Asking for help has never been your strong suit.
"That I wasn't strong enough and all I wanted was to prove to you that I could do it. I wanted you to be proud of me." You wait for any response but all he does is look at you. Silently he guides you to his bed. Wrapping a blanket around your shoulders that smells like him.
"When I found you, you weren't moving. There was so much blood. You were barely breathing." He shivers at the memory.
He doesn't think he'll ever get the smell of your blood and the sight of you sprawled out on the ground out of his mind. It's burned there. Every time he closes his eyes he sees it. He ran through the mansion. Begging for help with you in his arms.
They kicked him out once he brought you to the lab. He was close to breaking down the damn doors. He had super strength and a raging healing factor but he'd never felt so powerless before. When they finally let him back in he rushed to the bed. He never left your side. Watching and waiting for you to wake up. Begging you to wake up.
Was this his fault? If he had been by your side would he have been able to help? Or is this just the price of this life. To be a mutant and having to fight just to live. Losing you was not an option but it was becoming a reality he had to accept was possible.
"I'm always proud of you. Doesn't matter what you do. I'm always proud." You tug on his tank top and pull him close.
Kissing him with a soft passion, a desire, an apology. He carefully lowers you down to the bed. He lays you on your side as he deepens the kiss, hand ghosting over the scar as he tangles his limbs with yours.
"I'm so sorry Logan." You bury your head in his chest.
It feels so good to be by his side again. He tilts your head up to look at him. He grows serious as he brushes your cheek gently. You're alive but there's still a horrible worry inside of him. Though he doesn't think that will ever go away. Not as long as he loves you and he's never going to stop doing that.
"Don't ever do something like this again. I'm serious sweetheart, I can't lose you."
"You won't." You can't promise him that. Not at all. Bad things happen to those he loves but he'll be damned if he lets anything happen to you. You yawn and cuddle closer to his side.
"How can I still be so tired after sleeping for so long?"
"You really hurt yourself sweetheart," He glances at your side. Knowing that under the blanket was a scar that would never fade. A constant reminder of his own failure to protect you.
"I'm sorry for leaving," He knows it was a dick move to leave has he had done but he couldn't take it. He was so angry. So afraid.
"Just don't leave me again." You say sleepily. His arms wrap around you, his hand rubbing your back soothingly until you fall asleep. He watches you for a while. Not tired himself but keeping his promise of staying with you.
"I was so scared," He admits to no one but himself.
He rests his chin on your head. The sound of your heartbeat echoes in his ears. The sweet reminder that you're okay. He closes his eyes as the nightmares in his mind return. Seeing your lifeless body. The blood. All of it. He tries to shake them away but the thoughts still linger.
"Please, don't leave me. I love you too much to let you go." He whispers his plea to himself, to you, to whoever is listening.
He kisses the top of your head and you smile in your sleep. The comfort of Logan reaching your dreams. That's good enough for him, as long as you're okay. That's all he needs.
934 notes
·
View notes
Text
Finally Getting Help (prt 6)
Masterpost
The Wayne family gathered in the family room once Alfred was done setting up the projector, somehow there was also a plate of cookies and a couple pots of tea on the coffee table. How he’d found the time they didn’t know, he always seemed to be doing just a little more than should be possible but they didn’t question it.
Jazz seemed nervous as she plugged in her USB and accessed the power point on Ghosts and Liminality. The tidal page had a picture of Danny in his Phantom form standing with a group of others, a boy with gray skin and blond hair, a girl with green hair and skin, and a goth with purple eyes and a dark skinned boy who looked around Danny’s age, and Jazz with the title “Ghosts and Liminals!”
The next slide had simple text: “What are they and How are they made?”
With each slide she read the text on the screen allowed and then added any context or anecdotes she thought of, or had prepared.
(Next slide)
Ghosts:
Made of ectoplasmic energy and obsession
Made either:
when someone dies with strong enough desires
An idea gains enough traction to take on a life of its own
Immutable concepts and gods
Must be allowed to indulge in obsessions or they will cease to exist
All have basic abilities such as flight, intangibility, invisibility, and minor shape shifting
On top of basic abilities most will have additional powers based on their obsessions
Immortal unless killed
Love to fight
Liminals
Made when a human is exposed to high levels of ectoplasm for prolonged periods of time
Have some ghostly traits
Ghostly traits vary person to person
Less susceptible to human illness and injury
“The ghosts on the picture are Kitty and Johnny, we’ve had problems with them but would consider them friends now. They’re the ghosts of two humans who died, but there are others, Vortext for instance is the ghost of Storms. Those ghosts who come from ideas are called ‘neverborns’. There seem to be almost an infinite number of ghosts, however not all of them are interested in having anything to do with us so we tend to get the same faces showing up a lot in Amity.
“I don’t know how many liminals there are. I thought they might be new with my parents' research but as I look into it more I think there are more natural sources of ectoplasm then my parents thought.” Jazz explained before going to transition to the next slide.
“I have a question-” Bruce started before Jazz hushed him.
“Wait till the end please! I might answer it without you having to ask,” She scolded, and he felt very much like a schoolboy again as his children snickered.
(Next slide including a image of the glowing green viles in the Fenton’s lab and a glowing green crystal)
Ghost biology
Ghosts do not have any recognizable organs or bones
The only solid part of their being is their Core which is the source of their ectoplasm
Any injury to a ghosts form not done directly to their core is considered minor and will heal
A healthy ghost is fully capable of mending any damage including removed limbs in a matter of hours or days depending on extent of the injury
All injuries not including the Core are considered minor
Ghosts are considered young for at least the first hundred years of their existence and are often not considered adults until nearly 500
A caveat to this is ghosts are heavily driven by emotion and will often be the age they feel they are allowing ghosts to mature much more quickly, or more slowly
When this is the case ghosts are treated as the age they present and behave
Ghosts reproduce by shaping ectoplasm and Wanting a child badly enough
“Believe me it was incredibly scary the first time I saw Danny in his ghost form have something go right through his stomach. It took him a long time to convince me it wasn’t a big deal and it barely hurt. He does have to make sure he repairs the damage Before turning human again though or the damage can transfer over and I don’t need to tell you a hole in the gut is a lot more serious for humans!
“If I’m honest I only know ghosts that have stayed younger then they really are, for instance Youngblood who’s a few hundred years old and could be well on his way to adulthood if he wanted but has remained a child. I assume it can go the other way though, if a ghost is very mature for their age.”
Ectoplasm
Ectoplasm is the energy that makes up all ghosts and the Ghost Zone itself. All ghosts can feed on the ectoplasm around them as well as produce their own by indulging in obsessions. The ghosts Cores produce the ectoplasm like a brain produces neurochemicals when exposed to the right stimulation.
Ectoplasm is a powerful source of energy but unstable. When it is stabilized into an ecto-crystal it is more stable and can be used as a power source safely by ghosts and liminals.
“Most ectoplasm is green like you see in the pictures. But it isn’t the only colour, some other ghosts produce different colours and it is highly tied to what emotion drives them. When it’s pure it usually smells like petracore but it can get pretty foul.”
(next slide)
What are Obsessions
Every ghost has one or more obsessions
They can be very literal things such as boxes, or ideas and emotions such as Love
In rarer cases they may have dual obsessions
Unlike for humans obsessions are very healthy for ghosts
Ghosts need to indulge their obsessions
Sometimes the way ghosts indulge their obsessions might seem evil, however it is almost always just amoral
Obsessions shape every part of a ghost from their powers to thier physical appearance, to befriend a ghost you Must understand and aid their obsession
In very extreme circumstances a ghosts obsession may shift, sometimes this is healthy, more often it is a result of extreme trauma
“With my interest in psychology this was sort of hard for me to accept. From the outside the way ghosts obsess seems really unhealthy but it’s what gives them life. When not allowed to indulge in their obsessions ghosts will dysregulate and go to extreme lengths to try and get their obsession, if that doesn’t work they either go dormant if their core is still healthy enough or they will melt.
“Ghosts change their obsessions very rarely, I’ve heard of it happening as they heal. For instance once a ghost has gotten revenge for themselves, if that was their obsession, their obsession might shift to avenging other people, or even protecting them so they don’t need to be avenged.”
(Next Slide)
Ghost Culture
The Ghosts have a monarchy
The title of the Ghost King is not hereditary but passed through trial by combat
Under the monarch is a council of being known as Observants, and powerful and old ghosts called Ancients
Ghosts respect strength and value power and cunning in combat a lot
Ghosts bond with each other through combat and play fight with family and friends often
“I have down that the ghosts are a monarchy, and technically that is true but the current Ghost King was a tyrant who was locked away thousands of years ago. I’m sure as soon as someone shows up who’s powerful enough to beat him his court will be happy to pick up where they left off with a better King, or queen, though I don’t think the title has to change based on gender.
“I really can’t stress enough how violent ghosts are! Because nothing short of having their cores shattered can kill them, play fighting for them can look Very Much like a murder attempt to a human. A lot of the issues we’ve had with ghosts have come from them just not understanding quite how fragile humans, and for most of them they feel really bad once they know they actually Hurt someone by shooting them. It’s really best for everyone when they’re kept separate and Ghosts can happily tear each other apart in peace.”
Liminals
The result of long term low level exposure to ectoplasm, sudden high doses are almost always deadly
Liminals Can have almost every trait a ghost can, usually having a combination of a few
Commonalities between liminals include
Minor cosmetic changes such as: glowing eyes, pointed ears, and/or sharp teeth
Increased stamina, strength, and aggression
Increased obsessive behaviour
Liminals sometimes develop powers shaped by the strength and type of obsession
“Most of the people Danny and I know are liminals. I don’t want to talk about them in case they don’t want to be outed so I’ll talk about myself and my parents. We all had prolonged exposure after all. My ears are pointed,” She said brushing her hair back so they could see them, “And Danny is a little more then liminal but even in human form he has fangs.
“My parents didn’t realize it but they could to the point they could subsist on their obsession without needing to eat or sleep as often as a regular human would. About a year ago I started developing the ability to tap into and feel other peoples emotions, I can feed on them a little too but I try not to because the Worst ghost we met did that and I don’t want to be anything like her.”
(Next Slide)
In conclusion
Ghosts are not evil even though sometimes their actions are hard to understand
Never get between ghosts when they’re fighting each other but it’s usually safe to yell at them to remind them not to break anything
Never get between a ghost and their obsession
Don’t drink ectoplasm unless you know you’re already liminal
“I have a feeling the section about liminals will be familiar to a bunch of you. I know Damian is liminal though I don’t know how he was exposed to ectoplasm and some of you,” Her eyes skirted across Tim and Bruce. “Are toeing the line. You’ll probably notice Damian and Danny getting really close, and they might get in some really vicious looking fights. I promise Danny is playing at least.”
The family was left silent for a moment, Bruce knew he was thinking about Jason. Who had died, been exposed to.. What certainly seemed to be something like Lazarus water and come back, obsessive, aggressive, and emotional. He wished he’d had this powerpoint a long time ago. It helped understand Damian too but mostly he was thinking about Jason. He needed to reach out again, maybe meeting Danny would be good for Jason?
“So uhhh, ya, that’s the end of the powerpoint?” Jazz said, shifting from foot to foot in the awkward silence. “Any questions?”
Next
#danny phantom#fanfiction#dc x dp#jasmine fenton#bruce wayne#damian wayne#alfred pennyworth#liminal#tim drake#jason todd#trans!danny#the batfamily#danny is pregnant au#finally getting help au#vlad is a creep#dc stands for disregard cannon
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
Oracle!Reader Part 25
Masterlist - Part 1, Part 24
Warning! My au is yandere and can detail gore. This chapter doesn't but previous chapters do.
The setting sun against the soft orange and yellows of the sky was a beautiful sight.
The hot wind cooled down into a warm breeze as people leisurely walked home, while others rushed to finish last minute tasks.
Inside Xinyue Kiosk, a fairly busy staff was running around as the weekend always brought more customers.
The only room that didn't have staff running in and out of was a VIP seating set on the top floor. A beauty for sure, but no one other than the needed servers were allowed in.
Smoke was blown into the air between two imposing figures while waiters placed a variety of foods onto the wide circular table.
“You reported a successful mission, Yelan, and even got your payment.” Another inhale of tobacco through a pipe was followed with a lazy exhale. “Yet that Oracle still walks around without fear. I don't believe the revival of the deceased is possible just yet.”
Scoffing, Yelan popped another spicy appetizer into her mouth and let Ningguang wait for her answer.
“I said they were shot off a cliff and landed with a splatter on the ground. Should I have taken a picture with a Kamera as proof too?”
Ningguang’s claw-like nails tapped on the table as she hummed contemplatively. “I assume you'll resume your hunt to finish the job?”
“My, how perceptive of the Tianquan to guess that I, who was severely injured and recently humiliated by a foreign smart mouth, wouldn't correct my mistake.”
The glowing blue dice in Yelan's hands shatters as the strings pull it apart. The hydro particles sharpen back into string as she lazily followed it with her eyes.
Her confident and unfazed demeanor wasn't suited to her beat up appearance. Bandages hidden beneath her clothing made it bulky in odd places, while her hand was stuck in a cast after it was crushed by the Geovishaps.
“That's good and all, but are you even physically fit to track them down? I know Dr. Baizhu refused you from his pharmacy, and he's the only one capable of healing you fast enough for this.” Ningguang paused to feed herself a few bites of Tianshu meat with her chopsticks. “Not to mention, The Oracle was the one who was healed by him instead.”
“I see you enjoy rubbing salt in my wounds.” Unperturbed by Ningguang’s taunts, Yelan crossed her legs as more hydro lines wrapped around the striking scratches on her arms that were left to heal on their own.
“Not that I'm surprised by that. You always did have a sadistic streak. My rare failures are the highlight of your day.”
Pastel pink lips with a forming purple bruise at the corner were licked despite the pain as Yelan smiled.
“But pain doesn't stop me, you know as well as I do that it only strengthens me further. And I've had more than enough days to regain my energy.”
Concluding the conversation, Yelan pushes herself off the chair and turns away, with the snow-white coat swaying behind her.
The clink of Ningguang’s cup being set on the table was enough for Yelan to slow down. To pause just in time to hear-
“I don't want you to kill The Oracle.”
Yelan came to a full stop at that.
She had tried to ignore how calm Ningguang was throughout the whole meeting. She had tried to brush off the amount of food Ningguang ordered.
Furthermore, she even tried to not question Ningguang's change of vocabulary from calling Y/n ‘the faker’ to ‘the oracle’.
Ningguang only smiled politely, the exact way she knew Yelan despised, as the trinkets adorning the hydro user swayed.
“And no, this isn't a joke.” She never fucking thought it was a joke.
“You'll be able to keep your payment too.” She didn't want the damn payment.
Not a trace of fear could be seen in Ningguang’s maroon eyes that stared into emerald tones that never failed to invoke a chill in enemies.
The click of Yelan's heels were the only sound heard as the tassel attached to her collar bounced.
“Then why are you requesting me to stop my pursuit?” The white and gold of Ningguang's outfit clung to her body like second skin as she took her sweet time answering.
“I was a bit too hasty in my judgment. Something greater than us both showed me my error.”
Annoying.
That's how Yelan found Ningguang at times.
Like she was greater than the rest. As if the Jade Chamber she spent her time in above everyone else placed her above in all other areas as well.
“Are you claiming that Y/N truly is the Oracle? Can the mighty words of the Tianquin prove that alone?”
“Careful Yelan, this kind of outburst isn't like you. I said it was greater than us both.”
Ningguang picked up her cup again and nursed it delicately.
“I simply want you to at least temporarily stop you until I'm sure of what to believe. This is just business, don't take-”
“Yes, yes, I already understand. Don't take it personally.” Yelan had already cooled down at this point.
There was no use in getting worked up over this. Although it was upsetting to find that she failed this job, if the employer no longer wanted it, then she wasn't going to push for it.
Pride and personal feelings should never get mixed up in this line of work, after all.
“I'll reach out to you at a later date for your next commission.” A server placed a piping plate of Cured Pork Dry Hotpot on the table, slipping Ningguang a piece of paper. “Just be sure to give Y/N the correct instructions on how to get here.”
Yelan ignored the Tianquan’s words as she walked to the door. “While I won't take any revenge on Y/N, do not expect me to come running back for this mission when they are inevitably shown to be a scam artist.”
The thought of Ningguang of all people being scammed is absurd. The two words just didn't belong together.
“I'm not one of your employees. You're just a commissioner at the end of the day. You seem to forget that fact.” Green eyes met red as both women masked their own faces with polite sarcasm.
“Don't take it personally.” The soft click of the door being shut left Ningguang in silence, with only the outside's bustle of activity to accompany her.
Amusement was clear on Ningguangs face as she took another long inhale of the pipe.
“Yelan never changes.”
--------------------
You didn't have much time left.
The sun was beginning to get masked by incoming gray clouds that no one seemed to notice before now.
It was funny how the first droplets started to come down on the woman you were arguing with when you asked for the time.
A single request for the time devolved into an argument about how all foreigners were suspicious and that only Morax deserved the title of Archon.
It was typical that you ended up asking the local nut job for the time. What would she even be? Racist? Godist? Archonist?
Maybe it’s ethnocentrism.
So you just blindly believed that the dinner must be soon and left to the restaurant after watching a stream of water single her out and dump her with water.
A shame you couldn't enjoy it with how your stomach was cramped up from the upcoming meeting with Ningguang. You haven't been this nervous since your first meeting with your boss back on Earth.
It made sense. Both people were powerful, mysterious and used people without a second thought.
The chilly breeze slowed your heartbeat as Xinyue Kiosk came into view, approaching the stairs leading up to the entrance, you spotted a very familiar figure next to the waitress.
Not slowing down, you walk up the stairs as jade eyes lock onto you with malice on the verge of hatred. A tsk leaves Yelan’s lips before she turns back to the waitress while pointing at you. “This is the Tianquan’s guest. Lead them to the room.”
Nodding, the waitress waits for you as you move past Yelan who doesn’t spare you another glance. Just as you followed the waitress into the entrance, the rain began to pour without warning.
You just barely caught sight of Yelan slipping on the last step due to the rain as her wet hair stuck to her skin. The door closed before she could see your little smile at her ‘misfortune’.
It was a shame that Teyvat couldn’t help you in more meaningful ways, but these minor instances weren’t taken for granted either.
Following the waitress past multiple tables, you looked around it curiously. Usually the game just cuts straight to the room, so you never got a good look at the restaurant itself. Most of them looked to be regular customers with tables near each other.
Farther in, you could see a shift in the layout and type of customers. Larger tables with big gaps as the customers wore fancy clothing clearly made of high quality silk and cotton. A table with blue hair caught your eye the most.
A bored looking Xingqiu sat next to an older man with navy blue hair. His hair was tied in the most pitiful ponytail you’ve ever seen, but at least his fancy suit looked nice.
It took you a bit but you finally remembered it as the skin from the 4.4 Lantern Rite event. You almost missed how Xingqui noticed your presence and excitedly waved at you before his father began to scold him.
Smiling apologetically, you gave a brief wave back before following the waitress up the stairs. Just how much further was Ningguang’s room? It couldn’t have been cheap, that's for sure…
It wouldn’t be that uncomfortable to walk all this way if people could stop staring at you. Half the restaurant had to be giving you a side eye harsh enough to kill as you walked by.
Stopping at a door the waitress pulled it open as thunder roared outside giving a brief flash of white behind the window frame. Licking your lips, you entered the room while the door shut behind you with a soft click.
“I’m glad to see you’ve made time to meet me, Y/n.” The voice of the source of your stress and anxiety was sweet, if not seductive. Moving your eyes from the fresh plates of food to Ningguang who sat at the head of the table, you smiled sharply.
“You make it sound like I had a choice in the matter.” Striding forward, you took a seat on the opposite side of the table and helped yourself to the food. If you were going to die, you’d rather it be quick and with no regrets.
“I apologize for any inconvenience my request may have caused you. I’m sure many people have wanted to speak to you after your unfortunate encounter with Yelan and Miss Shenhe.” Wow, she wasn’t even trying to be subtle.
Taking your sweet time to chew and swallow your food, you leave Ningguang waiting until finally opening your mouth. “Why don’t you skip the sarcastic pleasantries? I already know your true colors, do you think the Creator is as stupid as you are?”
Fuck being nice and polite. She wants to treat you like some dumb foreigner that has no clue on the connections she holds? Then she can handle you acting like the annoyed and irritated person you currently are.
The smiles you both wear are mirror images of each other, the slightest downward tick of her lips showing her displeasure was far too easy to mimic.
“Then that makes things easier for both of us. Do you know why I invited you here to speak with me, Y/n?”
Again, you leave her waiting for your answer as you pick a few more dishes and savor the flavors. The dishes were wonderful, no doubt about that but…
You missed the taste of the hotpot you shared with the Kamisato’s more.
“I had assumed it was an apology for sending Yelan on me like a bloodhound. But perhaps you were just after certain pieces of information that I might hold.” Your mind wandered back to Beidou who had spoken to Ningguang after you gave that prophecy to Beidou on the Crux.
Although it felt like ages ago, it’s been less than a month since you left the Crux. From what you could recall, the prophecy you gave the crew was that all the monsters, Leylines and other strange behaviors were due to the Creator returning.
Thinking back on it, you did largely gloss over the details to avoid being caught in your lie. Maybe that’s why Ningguang wanted you alive? After all, your words couldn’t be taken lightly after what happened with the Geovishap hatchlings. But she did send Yelan after that incident so unless she was late on hearing the situation, which was frankly impossible, she must have got some new evidence-
“Well, not quite, but it’s related so why don’t you listen to me before casting any judgment?” As if she was anyone to talk but interrupting her wasn’t worth it. Not when you could potentially find something useful.
Ningguang barely touches the food as you scarf it down like a man starved. Instead, she takes a long sip of her tea, purposefully leaving you waiting. Talk about petty, you think to yourself sarcastically as she sets her cup down.
“Recently I had a very unusual dream, I’ve had it once before but in a much different context.” A plain soup is stirred lazily as she stares down at the rippling liquid, she looks pensive with eyebrows furrowed ever so slightly. “Rex Lapis appeared to me the night that Yelan reported a job completed. Now, isn’t that strange?”
You didn’t stop or slow down your chewing as your heart thundered in your chest. Zhongli really appeared in Ningguang’s dream again?! This had to have been what he was telling you earlier about thanking him.
Should you thank him with a smile or a slap for making things more complicated? It’d be easier to decide later.
With Ningguang’s expectant ruby eyes on you, you shrugged your shoulders with an easy smile. “Is it that strange? The Oracle of the Creator that we all worship had just been shot down by the orders of the Qixing that are from his own region. It would be an insult to the Creator to not step in.”
An amused hum leaves Ningguang as she listens to your words. Still not touching her soup, she set her utensils down to fold her hands. “Rex Lapis did not speak to me the first time he appeared to me. But this time he did, only saying one sentence. Can you guess what it is?”
The urge to roll your eyes at the predictable question was strong but your self-control was stronger. “It would be confirmation of me being the Oracle, of course. Anything else would be blasphemous.”
“Do not be bewitched by novelties.”
The absurd and out of place words earned Ningguang your undivided attention. Your mouth opened to portray your shock and confusion, but your lips quirked to the side at the last moment in a disbelieving smile.
“Are you trying to say that, that sentence is what the Geo Archon said?”
“It is indeed.” Oh, you were going to smack Zhongli after this, screw the consequences! “I believe it’s safe to assume that he was talking about you.” A black gloved hand with gold claw like pieces attached were outstretched to you as she smiled down at you.
“It’s just as you said, ‘It would be an insult to the Creator to not step in’ when someone is claiming to be connected to our All Mighty Creator only to be proven false. ‘Anything else would be blasphemous’ no?”
Wow, you were right to hate Ningguang. Her smile became as sharp as her nails as you relaxed back in your chair. You couldn’t give her anymore ammo. Any sign of hesitation, nervousness, or even a waiver of emotional instability is all she needed to corner you.
In fact, this could all be a bluff! Zhongli truly believed you to be the Oracle, after all. Chances are that Ningguang altered Zhongli’s message to test you. Zhongli wouldn’t betray you, he wouldn’t…
Would he?
“And how am I supposed to blindly believe your words? After all, the first time Morax came to your dream you claimed that despite how much you wanted to tell him, you couldn’t say a single word.”
But it seems your reply was just a tad too late, as the heavy pounding of boots on wood flooring came from behind you. Pulling your eyes from blood-red ones to the Millelith guards now behind you, a hand grabs your hair and pushes you down.
The crack of the plates breaking and cutting into your jaw is only overshadowed by the food smearing your mask and skin. The humiliation is what really gets you riled up, but you swallow it down in favor of looking back to the modernized embodiment of mora herself.
“Is this really necessary? I wasn’t even getting up from my seat.” There’s a slight growl to your words that you don’t bother to mask as Ningguang lets her gaze move from you to the guards.
“They have a point. Release them, I only told you to use force if they display hostility.” Ningguang’s tone of voice is even, and not the usual professional kind. The soldier’s grip tightens for a brief, painful moment, before finally letting go and stepping back.
“My sincerest apologies for my misconduct, Lady Ningguang.” The soldier that touched you bowed to Ningguang as you glared at him. “But I implore you to take my reasoning into consideration.”
Pushing away the now destroyed dishes as a few servers cleaned up the mess, you listened halfheartedly to the soldier. “This person - no, this thing is the one responsible for the kidnapping and subsequent death of the most vulnerable children in this region.”
Blatantly, you sneered at the soldier while wiping off the food from your face. How dare he, a full-blown soldier no doubt trained to protect Liyue Harbor, accuse you of being the kidnapper when you were the one who saved them?!
Every soldier that you met when information gathering was more useless than the last!
Ningguang knew the truth, Xingqiu and Chongyun both told you how the Qixing were aware that you were the actual hero. Whipping your head to her, you stared at her to see just what answer she would give.
“Even still, disobeying my orders is enough cause for punishment. Return to the Ministry of Civil Affairs and have them send a different guard who can follow orders rather than emotions.”
The guard slumped at the scolding and glared bitterly at you, as you flipped him off in return. While watching him stomp away, you cursed Ningguang out internally.
She definitely knew the truth but was purposefully keeping her statements vague. Almost as if she was entertaining the idea of you being the one responsible.
“I want you two to guard the door so Y/n doesn’t escape during this conversation. Do not make the same mistake as Zhenhai.”
It was her.
Ningguang’s the one who spread that rumor that’s messing up your reputation. You should have guessed it earlier. Only she could have the intelligence to figure out the truth, the connections to spread her lie, and the power to make it have a physical effect.
But why? What did she gain from it?
Lost in thoughts and possibilities, you didn’t notice how Ningguang observed you. Beige strands rest on her shoulders to flow down her back till the ashen tips pool on her seat. Yet the blood-red of her eyes shine with something akin to fascination as she watches your fingers thrum against the wooden table.
What a delight for the eyes.
The silence is interrupted by the door opening and fake cat ears come into view. A new soldier closes the door behind the Yueheng before standing guard as she takes a seat without asking.
“I hope I’m not too late. It seems my invitation to this crucial dinner got lost in the journey.” Keqing began with a pointed look at Ningguang.
Smiling, Ningguang greeted Keqing in a pleasant but professional manner. “What an unfortunate result. At least you were able to attend now, hm? They are bringing out golden shrimp balls soon too.”
Judging by the slight twitch in Keqing’s demeanor, you can tell that she was simultaneously both annoyed and grateful. What a shame, you could have used her annoyance towards Ningguang.
“A pleasure to meet you once again Y/n, Yun Jin was very thankful for your quick and efficient help.” Smiling once you’re addressed, you nod and squeeze your hands together under the table.
Yun Jin’s name still shot a vague feeling of displeasure through your body. And Keqing acting like it was nothing only further enhanced it.
“Her show was magnificent. I’m glad she was able to successfully perform that day.” Waiters and waitresses brought out some more drinks and refilled Ningguang’s tea without interrupting as you began to speak.
“Let’s not beat around the bush any longer. Keqing, you joined us here to help conclude whether I’m truly an Oracle or not, right?”
Ningguang watched coolly as Keqing’s smile relaxed into nothingness, while her stare became firm. “That is correct. But please, focus on what Ningguang brought up first concerning her dream gifted by Rex Lapis. I’ll be making my own judgment by the end of this dinner.”
Nodding, you shrug your shoulders and twirl your cup without looking at it. “That seems fair. The outcome will be the same regardless.” The confidence behind your eyes is shown in the way you smile and relax into your seat.
“Ningguang, you still haven’t answered my question as to why I should even believe your dream even happened and if so, whether those words are what Morax said. But I’ll let it go for now and focus on something else for the moment.”
Jabbing a thumb behind you at the silent guard, you speak with a mock curious tone. “Just why in the world are people assuming that I’m the one that kidnapped the children when I was the one who saved them?”
Magenta eyes meet red before both pairs turn to you. “And please don’t treat me like a fool.” Resting your cheek on your palm, you sweetly spoke with a threat lingering in your words. “I already know that Ganyu couldn’t convince you both to think it was her who saved them.”
Ningguang sighs as if disappointed in your demeanor while setting her cup down. “The official details on the commission you took on are under wraps, just as the contract requires.” She looks down on you with her calm refusal as she finishes. “The Liyue Qixing isn’t responsible for what circulates and twists when it comes to word of mouth.”
You refuted her excuse just as fast. “I wasn’t asking the Qixing or the Tianqiuan. I was asking Ningguang.” Using your fingers, you begin to count the different instances of hostility.
“I’ve had people insult me, ignore me, discriminate against me, gossip behind my back and just as you saw before, even go as far as to be violent. If I went to Yanfei with this case against your personal guard Zhenhai I’m sure I could get a good settlement and put some bad light on you. Not anything serious, but surely annoying for you and the Qixing.”
Ningguang cleverly disguises her huff of irritation as her blowing steam off her tea, but you were just a little more observant than she gave you credit for.
“Should I even bring up how almost every medical equipment possible was either sold out or out of stock? The coincidence of it happening just as I was released from Bubu’s Pharmacy is a little too much to believe-”
“You’re still doing that Ningguang?” Keqing cuts you off accidentally to send an exasperated glare at Ningguang who only looked at her coldly in return. It seems you found something interesting to use. “It’s one thing to make my favorite dish out of stock, but it’s another to keep a medical necessity out of reach.”
“So I was right to believe that this was also your doing Ningguang?” You said with a laugh as Keqing looked confusedly between you and Ningguang who nearly glowered at you. “You didn’t tell Keqing either? Isn’t that just swell, I’ll fill her in on it while you prepare your excuse.”
The way Ningguang bristled at your insult filled you with spiteful pleasure. Turning to Keqing who gave you a wary look, you began to explain with a smirk. “It seems, while I was being hunted down by Yelan under Ningguang’s orders, the high and mighty Tianquin took it upon herself to ruin my reputation with her lies. You do remember interrogating Ganyu about who rescued the kidnapped children?”
“Yes…” Keqing answers with a suspicious glare as the servers placed fresh food on the table. Just how many damn servings did Ningguang order? “How did you even know-ah it must have been those boys.”
Knowing exactly who Keqing was referring to, you just nod while piling more food onto your plate. “Well the rumor about me being the one to spread it was being perpetuated during my absence and truly came to a head when I finally returned to Liyue Harbor. I have a certain Lady Ningguang to thank for it.” You sneered while pointing at her.
Keqing’s eyes widened as she listened to you, certain things must have been made clear to her too. “That explains why so many people came asking for an explanation on the Geovishap Hatchling incident.” Holding her chin with a pensive expression, she continued. “It also provides a good reasoning as to why you pushed me to give that public response even when our evidence was still shaky.”
… Why did you get a bad feeling at that?
Just what kind of statement was released?
With a fixed forced smile you stare at Ningguang who frowns at you before chuckling. “There isn’t any more reasoning for me to stay silent on the matter. Calm yourself Keqing, you as well Y/n.”
Folding her hands on her lap, Ningguang stared you down as she began. “Yes, I did create and encourage the rumor of you being the true mastermind behind the kidnapping. You were already beginning to become well known by the people considering how close you are to certain people and due to the false prophesy you shared with Captain Beidou.”
“Not false, my prophecy is very much true-”
“And while I am happy to have the children saved, we can’t let you walk around spreading lies about your identity, position and relation to the Creator. Especially after the Geovishap Hatchling incident showing just dangerous you are.”
“I didn’t have anything to do with the hatchlings. I was just as stunned as everyone else.” It’s a weak argument with no evidence showing otherwise, but you couldn’t let them slap that offense on you.
“The statement released about you was connected to the hatchlings.” Keqing cut in with a grimace. “From what we can gather based off your past actions and achievements, you having the ability to puppeteer monsters is the most likely outcome, and we told the public as much.”
Shit.
They were so far off yet closer than anyone else.
“I can’t and didn’t command those Geovishaps. Even if I could, what would I gain from ordering them to do so? It puts suspicion on me. I have no motive, and it was defamation to single me out and slander me in such a way without evidence.”
Turning back to Ningguang you asked with clenched fists nearly trembling with anger. “You haven’t explained everything. What was your goal in mind with vilifying me? Just damaging my reputation is not reason enough to spend precious time and resources on me.”
The food was beginning to grow cold, but you didn’t have the appetite to eat anymore. Ningguang didn’t look at you, but the humor she previously had was nowhere to be found.
“It’s a shame that someone as sharp as you is using their skills for such sad and disappointing reasons.”
“There is nothing to be ashamed of by being the Creator’s Oracle, no matter what trial and tribulations I must face.” Wow, you even impressed yourself with how serious and authentic you sounded.
“So you say.” Lithe fingers took out her pipe and leisurely left you waiting as you stared at her. Only after blowing it into your face did she finish. “What do you think would have happened if the foreigner with such a charismatic presence was suddenly found dead after rescuing children? How do you think the public would have reacted?”
Mind racing at her words, the surrounding setting seemed to fade away as your ears only picked up on Ningguang’s words.
“Now imagine they appear back in the city, injured but alive to tell the tale. Influential people and the like come to visit as their good deeds are spread within the city. A fresh face on the scene with information that even extended to knowing about private conversations I’ve had. How many people with grudges too high and old to handle alone would come, offering a helping hand, a mutual beneficial contract that could help the ‘wronged’ foreigner?”
“Haha… Hahaha!” You’re laughing before you know it. A hand on your mouth, grinning so wide that it could break your face in half. Keqing’s surprised expression as she eats and Ningguang’s stoic expression are barely processed as you keep laughing.
It’s all so funny.
It’s all so fucking absurd.
You weren’t even greatly physically impacted by the lies. It was more like drops of water into a bucket for you.
But that bucket was already on the verge of overflowing and there was no hole for you to drain the water.
The fact that Ningguang needed to lie and make such stupid leaps of logic to libel you just so that the aftermath of your death wasn’t a hassle was simultaneously hilarious and pitiful. Adding in the extra benefit of it forcing you into a corner where no one would be willing to help you was just that to her.
An extra benefit.
Maybe normal people would fall for the lies and not want to associate with you, but people of higher status would know better. They could tell when someone is being purposefully lied about. It was like an invisible mark on you, telling everyone that trying to help you was making an enemy of Ningguang.
That would explain why Xingqiu and Chongyun were suddenly pulled away by their families. All to corner you to being forced to meet Ningguang, forced to accept whatever accusation she wants to slap on you.
“You really are a piece of shit.” You said with a grin once your laughing slowed to a stop.
Ningguang really mustn’t have expected it as her face visibly contorted into shock and her pipe slipped from her fingers. It’s understandable.
Most people in your position would already be begging for mercy, but even those who had more pride and fight would just go on a tirade and rage. To any outsider, you were far too calm for your position.
Besides, who would ever dare disrespect the Tiantquian not only to her face but right in front of the Yuheng too?
“Since you finished saying your piece, I’ll begin saying mine too. It’s clear that you don’t want to see reason or the truth for what it is.” Standing up, you push your seat away as the guards suddenly come to attention. “Since you don’t want to admit that I’m the Oracle, why don’t we focus on Liyue as a whole?”
With hands behind your back, you casually walked around the table closer to Ningguang as she put her hand up to stop the guards. “Let’s start with the kidnapping case. Not only were the soldiers useless in almost every aspect, both within and outside the city, but they also can’t even distinguish petty problems from the serious ones.”
Stopping behind Ningguang you looked straight at the guards as you asked. “What’s more important? Chasing down rouge kidnappers or chasing a musician without a permit?” Both soldiers opened their mouth to answer, but Ningguang stopped them with a wave.
“This has nothing to do with the topic on hand. Stop avoiding your own faults and sins, Y/n.” She raised her cup to her lips as she looked at you with a turn of her head.
“Oh, but it does. It has everything to do with all the points you brought up.” Your hand snatched the cup from her opposite side as she glared indignantly at you. Keqings muffled laughter only made you grin wider as you returned to your seat. “This city has a lot of problems, but I am not one of them.”
“The fact that no one was willing to help me aside from Xingqiu and Chongyun, who both know me to be the Oracle, truly says a lot on how you and the Qixing run this city.” Sitting back down, you place the cup in the middle of the table, just out of her reach.
“So how could I not find it insulting that I, the only person to accept this commission, the driving force behind the operation, ended up the one taking the blame for it all. All for what exactly? To corner me when you didn’t even have proper reasoning to corner me in the first place?”
“We have every right to-”
“Shut the fuck up.” You snapped with a clearly disgusted face. Ningguang wasn’t as shocked this time and sneered right back at you. Honestly, you envied Keqing the most, who was pleasantly eating the golden shrimp balls while watching you both.
“You heard multiple varying information about me and continuously chose to listen to the ones that painted me in the worst light possible. Yet instead of conducting your own investigation, instead of relying on chance encounters, you sent out Yelan to deal with me, basically leaving her to deal her own judgement on me.” Throwing your hands up in the air, you nearly yell at Ningguang. “Who the hell fed only the bad information on me! Did you even tell her about how Beidou vouched for me? Or about how Beisht listened to me?”
“Yelan has all the skills, qualifications, and experience necessary to do a thorough investigation and choose an accurate judgement. You’re free to take it up with her if you want to continue pleading your case.”
This wasn’t going anywhere. It was like talking to a brick wall. A very judgmental and snarky brick wall.
It seems you’ll have to resort to it after all.
“Yet out of all the crimes you could possibly pin me with, it’s the one on the case that I solely took on that you chose? Is it because you knew that no one in this damned city would give a shit about them? Because you knew that while no one wanted to take on the responsibility of acknowledging and helping the homeless, everyone would be more than happy to blame someone tangible for it?”
Ningguang faltered at that, it was brief but present.
“Or do you really hate your origins to that extent? Do you loathe the homeless that you once stood beside?”
Thunder roared outside as your words were spoken. The look on her face veered off the edge of hatred and into murder. The metaphorical slap your words provided weren’t to be taken lightly after all.
Perfect straight teeth dug into her lips as her nails dug into her hands, uncaring for how the blood stained her black gloves till even her gold pieces shined with it.
What a delight to behold.
“How dare you bring up this topic-”
If you can’t reach her level of perfection.
“Spreading this level of nonsense, just how-”
Her level of composure.
“Do you feel no shame-”
“Do you not feel any shame? I’m not the one who left and never looked back.”
Then you’d simply need to drag her down to yours.
“I have done no such thing!” The table shakes when Ningguang slams her hands down on it, making Keqing quickly lift her plate off as the more precarious plates fell off and shattered.
Grinning, you point and laugh at her, blatantly mocking her as she flushes with embarrassment.
“You really are shameless, aren’t you? Floating around in your mobile home like a constant beacon of wealth and success. How do you think people feel when they see you up there? Do you think they look on with awe and envy?”
Standing up too, you rest your hands on the table to lean closer. “Or are you aware how all they can see is a symbol of the selfishness and a reminder of how mora can change a person?”
“It bothers you that no one even acknowledged how much of it sacrifice it was to you to give up the first Jade Chamber. Let alone be willing to do it again with its successor.”
Ningguang’s shaky breath before she sits back down as you mirror her actions is as satisfying as you imagined it. Especially when she no longer focuses on the main topic to instead defend herself. “I’m not and will never be ashamed of my beginnings. I have always kept the past in my mind and actions.”
“Then why did it take an outsider like me to accept the commission to save a girl to save a whole group of homeless kids that we were what? Not missing? Not important enough for the Millelith to get involved in?”
“Should I even mention the underbelly of the docks? Where all the shady deals, vagrant and poverty-stricken people live?” Clapping slowly, you finish with a sarcastic tone. “I have to hand it to you, you really know how to hide them from the public.”
If you were completely honest, you knew Ningguang wasn’t that bad of a person. She was the epitome of a capitalist, and it wasn’t her responsibility to care for every homeless person in Liyue Harbor.
Some people really did put themselves in their situations after all.
“There's nothing I can do for those who do not wish to be saved. Even if they aren't accepting of my help, I still do my part as the Tianquan to keep Liyue running for those who do want to accept my help.”
Food sitting forgotten on the table and Keqing discreetly ordering another plate of golden shrimp balls, not a soul dared to intervene in the growing argument between you and Ningguang.
“So by fixing the problem on the surface, your job is done? The ones who actually need help and want to better their lives are shoved in a corner to rot with the actual bad apples for the next Tianquian to deal with?”
“Twisting my words and shoving even more in my mouth to ‘win’ this argument isn’t the best idea.”
“Don’t get so offended Ningguang, all leaders are like you. Some even worse.” A few political figures from Earth flash in your mind as you speak. Sighing, you refocus back to Teyvat, knowing that your words would be too confusing if you tried to use anyone from Earth.
“Take the glorious Raiden Shogun or whatever other titles she uses.” Sarcasm coated your words as you spoke with a drawl. “Vagrants, the Nobushi and Kairagi are suffering from addictions, diseases and more without aid. Once well respected samurai that fell for one reason or another are left to suffer and commit crimes. Dying by their diseases, stealing from the poor and worse crimes are committed with the only outcomes being to die by the hands of defenders or by Tenryou soldiers.”
In your eyes, Inazuma was a mess. So many people died on the islands separate from Narukami Island. The vagrants were a constant and growing threat, most of the actual problems were solved by the traveler, yet the shogun picked a needless war that resulted in nothing but pain.
Just how did this conversation derail from being about you being the oracle to this? It was tiring and at this point you nearly wanted to give in and just leave.
“Are you saying that you find Liyue better simply due to how it treats its people?” Ningguang asked, the slight smile on her face made you suspicious.
“Liyue isn’t better. Liyue is a standard, and Inazuma is just failing horribly in comparison. But who knows? Maybe in a few decades, it can compare to Sumeru who only recently got their God.”
“So what of the people in Inazuma? Are the Tri-Commision as bad as the Shogunate?”
“Despite the obvious bribery in both the Tenryou and Kanjou Comission, they do, do their damn job, The Yashiro Comission even goes above and beyond in comparison. They’re the reason Inazuma hasn’t lost its entire population.”
“So if you’re really the Oracle then how do you plan to help them?” Ningguang asks it in an analytical tone. As if she plans on judging your ‘plans’ when she’s the fucking Tianqiuan.
“I don’t need to make any plans. I don’t have a position in Teyvat.” The retort comes with a little bite to your tone.
“You seem so certain that you’re the Oracle that I wanted to hear what your plans were for having that position.”
Did she believe that you made up this position for your own benefit? Well yes, yes you did, but certainly not for the financial benefit she seems to be imagining. “Let me straighten something out for you, Ningguang, Cause for as high and mighty you believe yourself to be, you don’t know everything. I’m not the traveler. My job isn’t to bend over backwards to do your job, it’s to prophecy about matters concerning the Creator. If the Creator told me about Liyue’s destruction and ordered me to stay silent, I would happily do so and watch every citizen drown without batting an eye, understand?”
Whatever reaction you were expecting didn’t happen as Ningguang began to laugh. But it wasn’t the mocking or condescending laughter she had before. Instead, she seemed truly amazed or even relieved.
“I understand now. I can now accept you as the Oracle by my own judgment, too.”
The confusion and slight perturbation at her words must have been on your face as she slowed her laughter to a mere chuckle.
“I apologize for what I’m about to tell you. You remember the dream I had concerning Rex Lapis? Well, I may have twisted his words for my own cause.”
You were fucking right, but you couldn’t even enjoy it, since it took you nearly an hour to get to this point in the conversation.
“If you weren’t the Tianquin, you would be in some serious legal trouble Ningguang. I can name at least 3 different laws you almost broke.” Keqing surprisingly spoke up at this moment. Honestly, you had forgotten about her, not that she seemed to mind.
“You can scold Ningguang after she enlightens me to what his true message was. How much mora should I bet that he was confirming me as the oracle?” Ignoring the snark, Ningguang clears her throat before snapping her fingers and motioning to the dirty plates on the table. The workers took the plates away before she dramatically rested her elbows on the now cleared table.
“Not every bewitching novelty is meant to cause harm, some lead to everlasting contracts.”
Maybe you should still punch Zhongli, what kind of help was that supposed to be?! Couldn’t he be direct rather than poetic?!
“That message was vague but clear enough for me to link it to you. Thus, I decided to invite you here to see if you really did deserve the title of Oracle and whether we could trust you or not.”
What a load of bullshit-
“I agree with Ningguang on this. While many things seemed suspicious concerning you, this conversation was helpful for us to see your real motives and future actions.”
And of course Keqing had to agree with the smirking vixen, making you calmly nod in response. This whole dinner felt like a haze to you at least point.
Not only did you have to prove that being an Oracle was real, attack Ningguang on several personal points and proceed with many, many leaps in logic. Just to find out, that she fucking knew the truth all along!
You weren’t even going to get compensation for all the troubles she caused, either.
It was clear to you why no one wanted to mess with Ningguang outside the usual bankruptcy. She was too annoying and petty as hell for anyone to want to deal with.
“I recognize that I did you a disservice by having Yelan investigate you before this dinner. For that, I do apologize and even have an offer for you.”
If it wasn’t money or connections, you didn’t want it.
“I’ll provide you with monetary compensation as long as you give a detailed speech and answer questions about the Creator’s return in my ‘mobile home’ as you called it.”
“If you didn’t know or remember, my presence and journey here is supposed to be discreet-”
“How does 5 million mora sound to start?”
… Maybe Ningguang wasn’t that bad after all.
“When do I have to give this speech? If it’s just the members of the Qixing, I’ll do it, but not publicly.”
Distantly you can hear Keqing sigh as Ningguang smiled pleasantly at you but you couldn’t hear it over the imaginary clinking of mora coming into your bag.
Money is what forced you to accept Ningguang’s offer for dinner. Much like on Earth, money is power.
It's done, it's finished and I'm even more tired then before. My last chapter was when my semester was ending and my new chapter is just as my semester is going to start. Please blame my job, my bills and Sandrock for the reason behind why this one took so long. I've been writing small things, mostly on Wattpad since it's just easy, but I feel like my writing style is constantly changing. Or it's just me again. But whatever the case, I've just been doing that to not get too rusty. Ningguang is hard to write for, mostly in relation to the reader rather then with other people. Not sure why, it just feels that way. It was a struggle to end the conversation with her but ultimately it works. Ningguang is just too canonically powerful to not have the upper hand in every way. Even still this chapter was also hard to write because I had to use so much thinking and planning to keep things consistent not only to the game but also to the other chapters. My au isn't one of extreme violence so I'm aware that it's harder to become engaged or see how threatening this version of Teyvat is. Quick update before I post, I either will answer everything or nothing as my youngest cat might need to go into surgery soon. The little vacuum ate metal while I was at work and the vet already said that if he does get surgery he might not make it.
Taglists is open as always and hopefully won't be struck down by Tumblr! [Tumblr made some changes to the tagging system so I'm not sure if it's working like before. If your name is there and not in italics yet you weren't tagged then let me know.]
@vvyeislazzy, @nikqi, @the-dumber-scaramouche, @etherisy, @yourlocalstranger123, @ra404, @iruiji, @goldenglow149, @haru-tofuu, @lsleepysimpl, @bebobeboben, @yuyuzi-ling, @amidst-the-tempest, @resident-cryptid, @mxd1zzy, @mochicurls21, @nervouseaglelover, @thedevioussmirk, @yumuramma, @kwqsla, @undecidingfate, @ehjane, @game-savvy, @akiramirae, @liansh3ng, @fluffy-koalala, @formacoon, @sxftiebee, @khxii-i, @ursinaw, @chuuya-brainrot, @sweetbills, @kazuchaos, @snowfoxnix, @bluebelony, @shellofthewell, @pencil-of-ashes, @ghostlyintervention, @taiformaifoe, @goaudduck, @carminerin, @maddysflowers, @zenith-of-all-zenith, @crazydreamcat, @leafanonsforest, @grimreapersscythe, @leylanx, @sapphireknown, @help-whatdoimakemyusername
@zhonglisfruityass, @mer0n37, @victoria1676, @mochinessss, @sinnful-darling, @emilymikado, @pix-stuff, @esthelily, @luxie963, @emmbny, @starsofabundance, @kbar1013, @xxblackroses623xx, @chxrlxtteee, @aludicpoet, @yandematic, @atrcclovsxoxo, @0lshadyl0, @esthelily, @t-rex-red, @ck123, @steadybreadbluebird, @118gremlin, @stratonia, @time-shardz, @farelady-fate, @valeriele3, @francisnyx, @byakuren100, @waveto-earth, @flyingpansaurus, @silverstarred, @iamapotatoe, @ghosthii, @beloveddroplet, @uchihaeirin, @ibelieveinsleep, @idk098, @thefirstonetoeverlikemeback, @toramune, @haaaaaades, @horologiumwise, @melovaaaa, @alittletiredcry, @aphxdea, @atsukawolfcat, @desirabletravel, @pinkpainc, @eccedentesiast-sapphic, @yuyuzi-ling, @hyperfixationwhore
@juuuuuj101010, @avalordream, @kurayamioterasu, @tottybear, @koiikuno, @lynx-of-skies, @quacking-simp, @synthe4u, @kascar-chronicle, @hug4helios, @hug4helios, @silverstarred, @koiikuno, @ithoughtthinks, @remiivx, @lemonade7255, @melpomenelurks, @average-yandere-enjoyer, @mnhao, @fuji-sen, @altumsomnum, @hehothrowawayfae, @unofficialabortive, @magnum0pus2231, @xxnessinessiellexx, @multiliker, @intpessimistic, @kitsunelivesyet, @extremelytoastybread, @mercy-not-merci, @silvermoon617, @evaline-ethan, @fallintothechasm, @imgonnaeatthatglitter, @bunniotomia, @3noa3, @astro-stars, @beary-kalkus, @yourfavepookiebear, @original-person, @alexx197197
#whisp's amateur work#sagau oracle au#genshin sagau#genshin impact#yandere genshin impact#yandere genshin x reader#yandere#genshin x reader#genshin impact x reader#yandere ningguang#yandere keqing#I thought I made that tag?#genshin impact sagau#sagau x reader#sagau cult au#sagau#oracle au#yandere genshin imagines#yandere x reader#me just bashing inazuma in the last half#I feel like the inazuma archon quests needs to be revamped#but woohoo! Natlan!#I really hope the tags work
506 notes
·
View notes
Text
Messages from your inner child - Pick a pile
Pile 1/ Pile 2/ Pile 3
My Paid Readings | My insta | My October goal
Liked my blog or readings? Tip me!
Hello everyone ! This is my another pick a pile or pac reading so please be kind and leave comment or reblog, and let me know if it resonated with you!
Note : This is a general reading or collective reading. It may or may not resonate with you. Please take what resonates and leave what doesn't. And it's totally okay if our energies aren't aligned!
How to pick : Take a deep breath and choose a pile which you feel most connected to! You can choose more than one pile, it just means both pile have messages for you!
I worked really hard on this pile please show some love by leaving comments, likes and reblogs!
Pile 1
(The cards I got for you guys - 3 of pentacles , 6 of wands)
Okay so the first thing i feel and heard is you inner child is quite proud of you and your growth, i also heard "in the process of healing" so many of you could be already healed or trying to heal, your inner child feels complete from this accomplishment of yours, I also heard for some of you, your inner child say "the love you always craved was already inside of you", why worry, when things are starting to fall into it's place, i know its hard but know the way i see you grow, from all those phases, hardships and you grew to be that exact person i always wanted to be, so own up to it, you deserve it all, and much more, for some of you your childhood could have been harsh or one of your parents too hard with you. I feel happy when i see you smile or laugh or when you bright up the room, i know someone worthy of us will see it, you have learnt a lot, haven't you? i see that growth in you, how mature you have become, but one thing hasn't changed is, your kindness, i am glad to see that in you, I feel so grateful to you and others around you that they love you, i see you walking towards your goal, path. I see our work we put in at times, became so rewarding and fruitful, all thanks to you. i also hear your inner child saying "don't be lazy okay?, we have so much to achieve" but along with that rest, don't stress too much, i feel and know you would do great! You could be the elder sibling or parent type of your loved ones~
with love.
Gosh your inner child is quite sweet and yet gave mature vibes, this pile gave me earth sign and Aquarius sun/moon/rising energy.
Pile 2
(The cards I got for you - king of pentacles, 9 of wands, 4 of pentacles, the empress)
Okay so the very first thing i feel and heard for this pile is, you could have had lots of expectations on you from very young age, like you would have to understand the family situation, and this group had "mature beyond your years" and the energy of this pile is heavy you could be the most emotional and sensitive and yet you learnt to hide it better, or there were times, grown ups around you didn't listen to you, or most of the times you were misunderstood, I also feel this pile could have gone through hard school life or home life, contemplating if you are not perfect you could not be loved, this group might also had big dreams when you were a child and wanted to see yourself in luxury, and experience what your inner child could not, I also feel there some people around you who "bullied or teased" you like making comments that are hurtful and them still making it or making it seem like it was a joke, which could have lead to your insecurities. Anyhow, let's dive into your reading. I heard your inner child say "you are perfect and more than enough as you are, you don't have to try to fit in because were never meant for that", "you were meant for more, to be unique", damn to those who were against you and your dreams, and know i am proud of you, and we will reach where we always wanted to be, i see your inner child being emotional and the energy here is heavy and mysterious, like i feel you did emotionally go through a lot, but i see your innerchild giving you some messages i am hearing "we got this", "we did it", "we made it", "we have to be successful", such a determined energy here, but i also hear , to go easy and be kind to yourself, you don't always have to the bigger person, you can make mistakes that is okay", i also see you patting your inner child back and them giving you a reassuring hug. Like they are telling you its all going to be okay, I also feel you could always have had liked luxurious items. A very random message but anyways, i feel your innerchild telling you it's okay to not be okay at times, you are also a human, be kinder to yourself everyday, love yourself the way you love others. Your inner child talks a lot, and its adorable and i also feel your voice or emotions could have been shut out. So they feel proud when you stand up for yourself.
That's all my lovelies, *i am closing the reading by sending virtual hugs to you pile 2*, just keep going~
Pile 3
(The cards I got for you - 9 of cups and page of pentacles)
Okay so the very first thing i feel is your inner child being totally satisfied. for some of you in this pile could have been the naughty kid lol they love your chaotic yet that honest energy, they also like that you have been healing and working on your growth, they like your chill energy and the friends you have made, they like how you trying to be more confident in your body, they feel so loved and cared for, your inner child is literally beaming with satisfaction, i also feel some of you could fulfulling your childhood dream more likely studying or making a career or name for yourself, I also hear your inner child says that they love you, all those tough times actually helped you becoming better, i see and feel your innerchild loves creating art or express themselves through the same like art, music to express how you actually feel. Okay so random, guys did you ever manifested something like something close to you and your innerchild or wrote it in journal i feel its going to be coming true! but anyhow, this pile has light hearted energy and your innerchild still is inside you so embrace it, and do try to once in a while pamper them~ I hear your innerchild say "good changes and your wishes will come true, just be true to yourself".
Thats all for you pile 3~
Thank you for stopping by! Take care and remember you are loved <3
#tarotcommunity#tarot reading#tarotblr#tarot cards#pick a card reading#pick a pile#thetarotwitchcommunity#divination#pac reading#future predictions#inner child#futurespousereading#witchblr#divine guidance#self love#meditation#intuitive readings#tarot blog#astro notes#psychic#intuitive tarot reader#astro observations#pick a card#pick a picture#spiritual growth#free tarot readings#tarot exchange#pick a photo#pick a tarot#future spouse
415 notes
·
View notes
Text
🌴Favela🌴
Astrology Observations
She comes from the favela
Hills of Santa Teresa
Underneath the Redeemer
And the sun in the sky
──────⊱◈🇧🇷◈⊰──────
🌴 - Pisces in your big 6 (Sun, Moon, Rising, Venus, Mercury, and Mars) make the native to be a big dreamer! Their dreams and spiritual world is endlessly beautiful 🥰🥰
🌴 - Why do I have a feeling Libra and Cancer placements cry at happy endings?? Is their energy right there! They don't like when good things end 😀💔
🌴 - Sagittarius Placements especially Venus/Mars/Mercury so blessed, these planets give a tropical aura to the native 🦋🦋🦋
🌴 - Taurus/Pisces/Libra Placements need to live artistic lives, life is poetry, life is art, life is music, you are a muse in your own world 🪭🪭
🌴 - Jupiter/Saturn in the 9H or at 9° 21° degrees are blessed with very good knowledge! They're always the wise one in the group! 🏛🏛
🌴 - If you have multiple aspects to your Sun, you can often have personality disorders lime bipolar disorder! Always in a change of a mood💣💣
🌴 - Those with fewer aspects to planet Mars in their chart don't get angry that fast. They're more calm and peaceful 🦭🦭
🌴 - People always say sister signs belong together, yet here I am a Capricorn biatch always getting in arguments with Cancer placements!! I got enough!! No hate to cancers tough!! Everyone is different 😊🫶🏼
🌴 - 2025 will be a very changing year for me omfg😭 I will have Scorpio Rising in my solar return next year! If I'm gonna make it out alive I will make more solar return observations
🌴 - Imagine having a favorite planet in your birth chart and that planet is being the one with the less aspects 😭😭? Sun is my fav planet and I have like 3 aspects this is bullshit already
🌴 - People with Venus - Mercury aspects are appreciated for their voices! You have a very beautiful one!!👏👏
🌴 - When you have Saturn in late degrees like between 20° to 29° usually means Saturn has to finish something in this life💞
🌴 - Moon in your 8H and Moon in Scorpio natives are the first ones to heal you! Usually, when you have people around you with those placements, it means you need healing💆♂️💆♂️💆♂️
🌴 - Venus in the first degrees between 0° and 10° need to focus on themselves first! You should always be your biggest priority
🌴 - Mercury at 9° and 21° is so talkative, and they always speak so fast and jump from subjects to another
🌴 - Scorpio, Cancer, and Pisces in the 2H usually become addicted with the thing they buy/spend money on
🌴 - Moon in the 9H is a very beautiful placement to have if you love traveling around the world this placement gives you the chance to do that (Moon at 9° 21° too)
🌴 - It is known that people with Capricorn/Aquarius Placements have beautiful legs! Take care of all your body parts in order also in order to love yourself take care of your body
──────⊱◈🇧🇷◈⊰──────
She come from the favela
Ask me 'e aí beleza'
──────⊱◈🇧🇷◈⊰──────
🌴 - My Mom has her Venus in the 5H and she loves to do a lot of sports, she is so hard to beat at any ball game like she always wins 😭😭
🌴 - Moon in your 10H or at 10° 22° degrees can indicate your feelings are exposed to the world or the people around you! And you may be afraid to show them your true feelings
🌴 - Saturn in water signs always make sure to not speed the natives healing process! It always comes with the time
🌴 - Aries/Gemini and Leo Placements are possibly the most curious people you will ever meet because they learn things everyday
🌴 - Moon between 5° and 10° can be the most active moon placement when they're surrounded with things they enjoy
🌴 - Juno asteroid between 10° and 19° degrees can indicate a spouse who's gonna teach you a lot of things
🌴 - Lilith between 20° and 29° is usually when Lilith feels the most powerful because she feels like she can run the world, is empowering
🌴 - Capricorn and Pisces placements can find comfort in isolating themselves if they actually need it!
🌴 - I don't think there is someone who can understand Aquarius Moon natives feelings better than themselves, because is their inner world after all
🌴 - Not an astro observations but since this post is targeted around travelling, there is a legend that says when your soul is in love with a country/place is probably because there is someone waiting for you in that place or country Do you think it is true guys?)If the theory is true my soulmate is living on the other side of the globe 🤡🤡🤡
🌴 - If Gemini or Mercury sits in the 6H you probably like to talk or to spread awareness and warnings about specific things like maybe a conflict or a war or any other crise
🌴 - Sagittarius Mars can have a good accent when they try to speak a foreign language it work if your Mars is also in the 9H or at 9° or 21°
──────⊱◈◈◈⊰──────
F A V E L A 🇧🇷
──────⊱◈◈◈⊰──────
🌴 - If your Pluto sits in the 11H or at 11° 23° you can attract envy from people around you especially friends are the first envy targets
🌴 - Saturn/Capricorn in the 12H can feel so tiring! Is usually because it is a very deep placement to have for the 12H topics make sure to rest
🌴 - I love how ambitious are natives with Saturn in the 6H or Saturn in Virgo/Saturn at 3° 15° 27° degrees, they really make the job done
🌴 - In my opinion Saturn really loves the middle houses like 5H/6H/7H/8H because it teaches the native hard lessons through learning where in other placements Saturn will mostly do lots of practice with the natives like the 1H or 2H
🌴 - Saturn in Aquarius/Saturn in the 11H/Saturn at 11° 23° will teach you how to value your true friendships and in the same time to learn how a friendship is suppose to work
🌴 - Lilith in Sagittarius/9H and at 9° 21° Most times can end up losing their faith or beliefs or simply changing them! (This can not apply to everyone)
🌴 - In the Vedic astrology placements in the 9H and 12H like Venus, Moon or Sun can find their spouses usually a bit more later in life
🌴 - In the Vedic astrology your nakshatra plays a big role in your personality, appearance, beauty, which one is yours? Mine is in Chitra 🫶🏼 find your nakshatra here! You'll need to do a nakshatra calculator first
🌴 - Aries Sun/Moon and Rising natives are so naturally charming, I swear their faces play such a big role in their beauty, especially the eyebrows
🌴 - I think is easier for mercury in fire signs to call and tell you everything instead of writing messages, I think they wanna say it face to face
🌴 - Moon and Sun can be introverted in the 2H/4H/6H/8H/ and 12H because these planets usually are more mysterious in those houses
🌴 - Jupiter in Virgo/6H and at 6° 18° have so much luck when they're looking for a job! It might actually be manifested into your subconscious
🌴 - If someone has their Jupiter in the same sign as your Venus, they can be so much into you without realizing it is something that grows over time
🌴 - Virgo Moons think more logical than others because they loveee to keep it in order, everything has their own time in this space
🌴 - If you have your 11H connected to the 8H your *fake* friends may want to use you for money, take care of such people (How they can be connected? Look if the ruler of the 11H is making an aspect with the ruler from the 8H)
──────⊱◈◈◈⊰──────
🇧🇷 Deep in the colors and the streets
Lost in the funk favela beats
Prisioneira 🇧🇷
──────⊱◈🇧🇷◈⊰──────
🌴 - If your 7H is connected to the 10H can indicate your spouse can be the breadwinner and the provider in the relationship (How they can be connected? Look if the ruler of the 7H is making an aspect with the ruler from the 10H)
🌴 - Your 7H Lord/Ruler and its aspects can also tell you a lot about your spouse and your relationship with them.
🌴 - Mars in the 1H/3H/10H tend to really be turned on easily, I swear they're always there ready for something to happen
🌴 - Chiron in Virgo can indicate someone who may be very controlling and strict even with themselves but also with other people
🌴 - Virgo south node can indicate someone who worked in the favor of service and devotion in a past life
🌴 - I honestly love the trio of the natives with horns like Aries Taurus and Capricorn?? Horn creature - like are so beautiful!!
🌴 - Saturn in the 1H natives are more comfortable being alone than with people who stress them 24/7
🌴 - Leo and Cancer placements usually have very shiny skin, or their skin color might be really pretty (it can be any skin color) it will just make your appearance charming
──────⊱◈🇧🇷◈⊰──────
Chorando estará ao lembrar de um amor
Que um dia não soube cuidar
Canção riso e dor, melodia de amor
Um momento que fica no ar
──────⊱◈🇧🇷◈⊰──────
Damn this post took so long, but it ended so good! Let Venus to bless the aether! 💞🦋 Harmoonix
#astrology#astro observations#birth chart#astro notes#astrology observations#placements#astro community#horoscope#ascendant#venus#astroblog#astro.com#astronote#astrologers#astroseek#astro com#astro#favela#fate#blessing
971 notes
·
View notes
Text
Composite and Synastry chart real life observations by @astroismypassion
Credit to my Tumblr blog @astroismypassion
🔴 Moon square Jupiter in Synastry chart: I just didn’t enjoy that one as much. Especially if you have positive Moon Jupiter aspect in your individual Natal chart (sextile, trine), you are likely to not like this as much. Positive is that you can be much more realistic than usual and you have a very realistic grasp on who the person is. You don’t idealize them, put them on the pedestal. Negatives: there are a few actually, you probably live at a distance from each other or even whenever this person is in your home, you could feel like they are at times in a different place mentally, only physically present with you, but the mind is somewhere else. Likely not hanging out as much in each other’s home, usually out in the city exploring new places. A LOT of rationalizing of feelings happening. There is present the feeling of “false hope”. If this is a crush, person can do something really sweet, but in your mind you’re like “can’t have up hopes up”, because usually it’s just a kind gesture or they are being nice and friendly. You feel like exaggerating emotions or being overly dramatic is something that isn’t “allowed” or well accepted in this connection. Hence again rationalising emotions, feelings and gut reactions is likely to happen. Jupiter person feels like how Moon person expresses their feelings is just not one of the ideal traits they are searching for in the long run. This can also happen that Jupiter person might not want to move in with the Moon person. Jupiter person wanting to keep their own place or living on their own.
🔴 Mars sextile Mercury in Synastry chart: Mars person is usually more communicative. Mars person can also start majority of conflicts with Mercury person. Mars person might not like Mercury’s friends, on a few, if it’s positive aspects (sextile, trine). Mars person feels like Mercury person doesn’t communicate enough and not regularly enough with them. Mars person feels like they need to rationalize behaviour or reactions, which results in “walking on eggshells” with the Mercury person. Usually both like to resolve disagreement on the spot, right away and usually very quick resolution.
🔴 Mars trine Moon in Synastry chart: Mars person encourages Moon person to express their emotions more. Moon can feel peaceful when Mars person is arguing. Moon person react emotionally when Mars person is angry or voices disagreement. Likely working out together or just very active when visiting each other’s home. Both Mars and Moon person are very encouraging of each other to be expressive of needs and wishes directly and openly. Be mindful of unexpected pregnancies, you two are likely more fertile together than with other people!
🔴 Mercury in the 8th house in the Composite chart: Be mindful of the power of words in this connection. Because sometimes you may hurt each other with words so deeply that the wounds won’t heal. Positives: you encourage each other a lot of speak up your mind and the other person always wants to know what the other is thinking. Negatives: there can be outbreaks of anger, crying, accusations or an emotional breakdown at some point. But the thing is that this can be a positive as well, because you will feel like it’s “cleansing”, that you are not only letting go the argument with your person, but also previous past hurts, because you realize that those past feelings that you had as a past version of yourself don’t resonate with you anymore and that they are not relatable to you anymore. So like I said strong cleansing energy with this one, but it is on both ends happening, not just one person. Basically how the other person thinks helps to shape a newer, better version of yourself, you mature a lot. Try not to be too serious all the time, but also not to push their limits. More humour, joy is needed in conversations.
🔴 Venus in the 8th house in the Composite chart: The bond you have with this person really touches you on the inside. If it’s romantic, feelings for this person can scare you a little bit, because it can catch you off guard, when you are the least looking for a romantic connection or when you gave up. But when you cool off a little bit and become yourself again, you are likely to find this connection very positive and uplifting. Beware of placing too high of expectations on your person. If the connection is too intense at certain moments, try to keep your individuality and ground yourself, the person won’t go anywhere. You “melt” into each other, if you aren’t afraid to give up control, you experience what others often miss out.
🔴 Sun in the 8th house in Composite chart: Likely to earn a lot of money together. Probably feel like it was a fated even that you got to know each other. While in this connection you are likely to discover interest in your own life that you will grow very passionate about. Likely to experience career change, a move or start learning about a new topic while in this connection. Your old parts of personality that don’t serve you anymore will be replaced with new ones. Again, a better version of yourself.
🔴 Moon in the 7th house in the Composite chart: Trust here is usually very easy, unless the Moon is aspected by malefic planets. It’a very important that both feel emotionally content, because any divergence from that, the other person starts feeling really bad about themselves too. But if one person is jovial, happy and bright, the other person is likely to mirror back and feel that just as well.
🔴 Venus square Saturn in Synastry chart: Saturn person is willing to take on all responsibility for Venus person, but Saturn person demands and expects respect for it. Venus person likes that they can rely on Saturn person, Venus person can still be dissatisfied with the connection. Saturn person has hard time letting go and Venus person has a hard time relaxing Saturn person. Venus person can benefit from this (if they allow Saturn person to help them relax), since they can become for confident. What you really want is honest affection, but you just end up getting security.
🔴 Venus square Uranus in Synastry chart: Feelings can quickly develop, but you will still have doubts, if the connection is manageable to be long-term or you will doubt whether you will be in each other’s life for years, even if just friends. There is this feeling present that everything can quickly change and end quickly as well. Uranus person can’t really appreciate affection Venus person gives. But instead rather they appreciating affection, they feel trapped in the connection, restricted and like they need even more freedom. Uranus person can also be in a very non-commital era of their life. When Uranus person shows themselves as they are, that is freedom loving, Venus person feels hurt, under-appreciated, but also rejected or ignored. Venus person dislikes unpredictability of Uranus person, instead Venus person needs more warmth and sensitivity.
🔴 Sun in the 6th house in the Composite chart: Both could feel like you didn’t enter the connection voluntarily or wholeheartedly. Could end up feeling used, restricted in one way or another. You could be staying together for practical reasons. Might even stay together out of feeling obligated or because leaving your person could end up making you feel guilty.
🔴 Moon in the 3rd house in the Composite chart: Communication will always be determined by your feelings for each other. You both agree on how to do things. Make sure not to take advantage of your person’s weaknesses in arguments. Both feel immediately hurt if a misunderstanding happens.
🔴 Pluto square Mars in Synastry chart: Both are afraid that you will miss out on something, if you don’t commit to this connection and get involved with each other, either platonically or romantically. Pluto person is very set and focused on their own ambitions, long-term goals and can see Mars person as not as driven, ambitious as they are. Mars person can come across as a bit primitive to the Pluto person. Both are stubborn to make their goals a reality, even when those goals are clashing. Sex is like glue here, because it’s the only thing you both enjoy and agree on. Both need to learn compromise. It’s like Mars person wants to “conquer” Pluto person, but Pluto person can’t be conquered or doesn’t want to be conquered.
🔴 Mars sextile Mars in Synastry chart: There isn’t any competition between you two. Both take great initiative, so this is better for a long-term connection.
🔴 Venus opposition Mars in Synastry chart: If this is romantic, probably both don’t like traditional gender roles and you rebel against that. Venus person can be more vulnerable, feminine than Mars person. Especially, if Venus person is a man and Mars person a woman, Venus person cannot do the same things as they did with previous women. Mars person wants less vulnerable, sensitive partner, but instead desires a partner who takes initiative and works a lot. Venus person want vulnerability and harmony, Mars person wants strength and passion. Venus person also can’t appreciate Mars person’s strength and independence.
🔴 Sun in the 5th house in the Composite chart: Both accept each other as you are and give a great deal of independence and freedom to each other. You have a life outside of this connection and you don’t put pressure onto each other. But too much freedom can quickly turn into lack of interest in this connection.
🔴 Moon in the 4th house in the Composite chart: You are likely to be overprotective of this connection. And if someone say something about your connection you won’t take it lightly. You want to be in your own bubble and want to avoid being irritated by the outside world.
🔴 Moon in the 6th house in the Composite chart: You could feel like there is some sort of emotional neglect happening in this connection. One person can also think that they are giving more than the other. This is actually one placement that thrives when there is a bit of friction, because you will understand each other better after.
🔴 Moon opposite Mars in Composite chart: A lot of letting your bad mood out on each other out of frustration or being dissatisfied with yourself. You may not always be able to give comfort to each other. You may also not share your life with your person, because you think your own interests would suffer.
🔴 Moon square Pluto in Composite chart: You will need to learn how to respect your partner’s feelings. And to not jump to conclusions too quickly and learn how to see an issue from an emotional distance. Avoid needing to know every single secret of your person. Or making up expectations from your own feeling of insecurity that no one can fulfil.
🔴 Moon in the 5th house in the Composite chart: Both can be too moody, changeable and inconsistent to overcome challenges together. Also can be easily offended because of an exaggerated pride in this connection. You could have troubles committing to this person, because you might have a feeling that you might be missing something.
🔴 Sun in the 9th house in Composite chart: You may want to outshine each other with your achievements. You may struggle with closeness or you just don’t want to admit your weaknesses. You also get a lot of opportunities to create a future together.
Credit to my Tumblr blog @astroismypassion
#astrology#astroismypassion#astro notes#astroblr#astro community#astro note#astro observations#astrology blog#chart reading#composite chart#synastry chart#jupiter square moon#venus square saturn#venus square uranus#composite moon in the 7th house#composite sun in the 8th house#composite venus in the 8th house#composite mercury in the 8th house#mercury in the 8th house#venus in the 8th house#sun in the 8th house#sun in the 9th house#composite sun in the 9th house#composite moon in the 5th house#moon square pluto#composite moon square pluto#moon opposite mars#composite charts#composite moon opposite mars#astro observation
873 notes
·
View notes
Text
Okay, this is it.
It's been ten years of fucked-up, and it's been ramping up more and more over the last three since I came out. Between getting used emotionally and financially to be the sole support for this family, Getting harmed daily by a kid that I want to love and support but who can't understand who this stranger is that replace his dad and more and more things on top of it. To the point where I've had no resources, barely any energy to work or function, and near constantly hit adrenaline rush responses at random loud noises. But things are moving forward. Monday, my son moves into care that's well-equipped for him, and they'll be better for him than I ever will be at this point or any time in the future. My oldest kid is old enough to be independent and start doing their own thing enough to get out of here. I don't have to worry about or protect them.
I can get out. Just move, on my own, find a safe place and rest and heal. Finally. Just, I have zero resources to do it with. The last decade has fucked my credit and rental history badly, I'm sure, as well. Which means finding a place within my normal budget and sweetening the pot by pre-paying as many extra months as I can. Plus that way I can be covered for housing during my transition surgery recoveries, since this family and apartment managed to drain every last cent from my transition fund to keep from becoming unhoused. And it'll mean me having to do a lot less asking for support and help, because I won't be supporting four people on one income any longer. But all of that means I need to get money together. Quick. And a lot. At least 5k, if not closer to ten. So, yeah, I'm asking for help again. To donate: http://paypal.me/tormentedartifacts
If you want to get something in return for helping, there's also always http://tormentedartifacts.com but I'll be clear. Anything big ordered right now is likely not happening until after I move, if not after my surgery recovery, since I won't be able to sit fully upright or work for a big chunk of that. Which means you may not see it until next year.
But anything helps. Please. Even just five bucks. And so does reblogging and sharing this wherever you can. So, if you do, thanks.
595 notes
·
View notes
Text
“I kind of hate all this self-improvement talk. You know…all that ‘forgiving others’ and finding peace and all.” The villain shrugged gently and averted their eyes. Away from the hero. Away from that broken form, that torn skin and the broken bones. They needed a second. “I…hold grudges. A lot. It’s unhealthy, everyone says so at least.”
The hero’s breath was raspy. Wet, even. No doubt, their lungs were filling up with blood. And yet, their eyes were pinned on the villain.
“And everyone knows better, don’t they?”
A gurgle as answer.
The villain sighed.
“Everyone around me says I have to let go of others, especially those who hurt me in the past.” The villain lowered their voice and kneeled next to their nemesis. This time, they actually stared at the wounds, observed the blood. “But whenever I meet someone, they etch themselves into my soul. That’s not my fault now, is it?”
They touched the hero’s throat gently and the hero - who was choking on their own blood - that suffering and poor hero was finally able to close their eyes and breathe again.
“Maybe that’s why I loathe you so much. You did it so gracefully. As if it was the most natural thing in the world. One day you just showed up and demanded a place in my life.”
They clicked their tongue and let their hand move over the hero’s battered body, slowly letting their powers flow through them. Killing the hero would have been the smartest decision.
But when it came to the hero, the villain was never rational.
They touched the wounds and slowly, blood was drawn back into the hero’s body and their muscles, their skin weaved itself back together like fabric.
“I did all that stuff everyone else does; blaming myself, shaming myself, hating myself whenever I made a mistake. I’m thinking about what I have done in the past constantly. I’m thinking about all my flaws, about everything that makes me so despicable. It never goes away. I don’t know peace.” They took in a deep shaky breath. Their voice was breaking. “I know it’s pathetic.”
The villain was done with the hero’s torso now and felt themselves grow weaker. The hero had been close to death and the villain was by no means someone who could bring back the dead.
Nevertheless, they concentrated and continued their work on the hero’s broken knee.
“You talked about being imperfect last week, that’s why I’m saying all this…I don’t know if it’s just us. But I believe at some point, everyone thinks they’re not enough. Or a horrible person. So…if that makes us human, the mere idea of perfection has to be a human concept as well. Which means it’s just in our heads and not real.”
The villain smiled softly when they finished. They could feel the weariness of their muscles, the pain in their eyelids. Healing someone else requires energy. A lot of energy.
And since the villain was directly using their own energy, they were exhausted.
“I disagree,” the hero whispered. Their eyes were still closed. “But I understand what you mean.”
They took the villain’s hand and squeezed gently. The villain would have been flustered if they hadn’t been this terribly tired.
“You’re giving others too much power over yourself. You’ve never let that happen in combat, so why should it happen in your head? All those thoughts are real, real enough to control you.”
“I like you better when your mouth is closed,” the villain said. They let out another shaky breath and moved slowly; turned around and laid down next to the hero.
“Hm.” They could hear the hero smile. “Thank god I etched myself into your soul, then. You’re not getting rid of me, darling.”
“Hm.” The villain closed their eyes, falling asleep on the hard and uncomfortable concrete within a few seconds.
Hand in hand with the hero.
#writing snippet#heroxvillain prompt#heroxvillain snippet#heroes and villains#hero#villain#hero x villain#heroxvillain#h/c
227 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi Jade!!! I love, love, love your writing. I was wondering if you could write something for Tsam Peter x reader where reader has a concussion and Peter is just generally super sweet about taking care of them? I have a concussion right now and I feel like he would be so sweet about it. If not feel free to ignore this, love you!!! <3
i love u!! fem!reader, 1k
You’re shivering again. Peter looks up from his book suspiciously, squinting at the curve of your where you’re laying on his couch. He should let you rest —you’re allowed to sleep with a concussion, despite what some might think— but he doesn’t like the shivering. It’s weird.
“I'm coming, baby,” he says, standing up from the armchair to situate himself by your hips.
Peter pulls the blankets more firmly to your chin. “Are you cold, bub?” he asks. It might appear that he’s talking to you while you’re still sleeping, but the smile you give when he talks proves otherwise.
“No,” you force out in a mumble.
“Are you sure?”
It takes you some time to think about it. Your body’s been thrown for a loop since you hurt yourself, but you’re healing nicely, and your mental stamina is yards better than it had been. Peter asked you yesterday if you wanted a kiss and you couldn’t answer him for a full minute, and when you did it was an uncoordinated lift of your chin. You’re still in there, still his girl, just mildly incapacitated for the time being.
“I might be,” you decide.
Peter grabs a throw from under the coffee table and shakes it out over your arms and shoulders. “There. Need a drink?”
“Do you?” you ask.
“What?”
“You’re asking me lots of questions,” you say, slowly, quietly, but not without character. “I thought I’d ask one back.”
“I don’t need anything.” He tilts his head to align your faces, leaning in, not quite close enough to kiss you.
“You look very serious right now, Spider-Man.”
He glares for show. “So serious.”
“Sorry I can’t really make you a drink.”
Peter wipes the glare. “I’m sorry you got hurt. I don’t care that you can’t be my serf right now. When you’re better I’m gonna work you twice as hard, that’s all.”
You raise a tired hand to his jaw. You’re extra careful to offset your wonky hand, stroking a clumsy but tender line from his ear to his chin. “Can you help me up?”
Peter doesn’t question you. You’ve been recovering for a few days (he hasn’t realised before your injury that some people can take months to get better after a head injury, even without blood clots or fractures) and he’s not felt the urge to baby you beyond waiting on your every whim and want. If you’d like to sit up, that’s okay. The only thing he’d insist on is getting enough sleep at night, and thats something you’ll do happily.
“Can I give you a hug?” he asks, his eyebrows pinching up at their starts. “I hate seeing you shiver, it makes me sad.”
“Makes you sad?”
He squeezes your elbow where the blankets have fallen down. “Is that surprising?”
You want to trade jokes with him but you can’t summon a retort, and your smile quickly fades. It can’t be nice, feeling a shade of yourself. Peter’s heart aches for you twice.
“C’mere, pretty girl,” he says, slipping his arms under yours, encouraging you to wrap your own behind his head or let them rest behind his shoulders. He loves hugging you like this, almost lifting you, spider strength begging to be used as you sigh and settle into place against him. You feel a little like a shell of yourself, not quite quick with touches, fingertips twitching against his shoulder blade as he nuzzles his face against yours unabashed. “There you are. Where’d you go, huh? I was about to send out the search party.”
“I’m right here.”
“Yeah you are. Lucky me, right? Luckiest guy in the world.”
You sigh happily beside his ear, your face pitching slowly downward until it’s pressing against the curve of his neck, your arms slipping down his front as you run out of energy. He doesn’t mind, bundling you up with no intention of letting you go.
“How do you feel?” he asks.
“Still fuzzy, like… it’s like we’re talking to each other through a screen door.”
“Do you need something? Or want something? I’ll get you anything.”
“I’m fine.”
He lets out a sorry sigh. He wishes you’d want something, god knows he’d love to put a smile on your face. If you were feeling better you might ask him to go and get you something for dinner from across the city, or beg him to find you a bunch of flowers (which he’s always willing to buy). But sick, you ask for nothing. You just lay on the couch and wait to get better. Peter doesn’t think it’s super fair.
“I’m sorry you’re not better yet,” he murmurs, his lips drifting down to your temple, which he kisses weakly, the barest brush of his lips. “Wish I could take it from you.”
“I’ll be okay soon.”
“I know you will, but I still wish I could take it. It’s shitty.”
You think about this for a while. “It’s not shitty,” you work out finally, hand curling against his waist in a tired display of affection. “I have the… best boyfriend ever looking after me.”
“I’ll be here until you’re better, you know that.”
“I know.”
Peter ushers you back and lifts your blankets, slotting himself next to you with a careful arm held behind your back. You show some surprising excitement at the offering of a cuddle and work under his arm, shuffling down the couch to leave you both laying on the same cushion, blankets uneven but warm over your chests. “You should probably go back to sleep,” he says.
“Nap with me?” you ask, endearingly hopeful.
He turns his face, intending on drawing lines into your cheek with the tip of his nose until you either fall asleep or can’t take it anymore. “Sure, baby. I bet you’re exhausted, huh? Let’s sleep.”
He falls asleep before you, breathing snores into your cheek. You have enough wits about you to laugh, and then you fall asleep, too.
#tasm peter parker#tasm peter x reader#tasm peter parker imagine#tasm peter parker x you#tasm peter parker x reader#tasm x reader#peter parker x reader#tasm!spiderman x reader#tasm!peter x reader#tasm!peter imagine#tasm!peter parker#tasm!peter parker x reader#tasm! peter parker x reader#spiderman x reader#peter parker oneshot#peter parker blurb#peter parker imagine#peter parker x you#peter parker x y/n#spiderman x you#spiderman fanfiction
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
Rewind 2024 - Part I
WangxianFicRecs - Rewind 2024
Part one of our favourite stories published in 2024. If you also want to give a shout-out to a story, submit an ask and we will share it in an upcoming post featuring Follower Recs and Proud Author Spotlights.
~*~
much sweeter than
by mellowflicker
T, 3k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: Lan Wangji gets married knowing one thing: his husband is his equal.
~*~
Day 4: Time Travel
by UseMyMuse (@museywrites)
G, 1k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Part of Musey's Lanuary 2024
Summary: Lan Sizhui knows his parents are happy, but he wants to fix things so they never had to suffer. Against his better judgement, he goes back in time, though he isn't sure if things will turn out the way he expected.
~*~
old wounds, like hidden ghosts
by wordsonpage (@ronniexian)
T, 2k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: "Wei Ying, Wei Ying, you are a menace." "Oh, yeah," Wei Wuxian plays along. "And what are you gonna do about it, Hanguang-jun?" "Perhaps I should leave you." - Lan Wangji is possessed by a vengeful spirit during a night hunt. It takes Wei Wuxian a long, painful moment to notice. (my accidental darkji threadfic, cleaned)
~*~
my name on your lips
by kopicanai
T, 2k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: To the mortals, he is Hanguang-jun. To the other gods, he is Lan Wangji. To Wei Wuxian, he is simply Lan Zhan. A Chinese gods AU
~*~
Changed for the Better
by tigerlilly3224
M, 4k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: “T-They have busy lives. It’s hard for them to step away.” Wei Wuxian didn’t usually stutter. He was tripping over his words. Trying to justify the accusations faster than his mouth can form the sounds. His brain brought up the long prepared list of why the Jiang’s did and always would come first. Lan Wangji narrowed his gaze. “You lower your own worth for their sake. You told me you wrote wrong answers on assignments so you wouldn't get a better grade than Jiang Cheng. You are your own person Wei Ying and you live as if you take up too much space. I want -“ {aka. college roommates wangxian learn to navigate their lives and heal each other along the way ✨🫶} ** on page panic attack, past referenced/implied emotional child abuse & neglect // rating due to topics both mentioned & implied but there is no spice here just feels
~*~
Having one soulmate in this life is enough
by secretninjagirl (@shawoloser)
M, 1k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: “Wei Ying, come to bed,” he says. His eyes are still so soft, and his voice is so warm. “Yes,” Wei Wuxian says, wondering if his voice sounds as unsteady as he feels. He doesn’t know what this means, but he’s powerless to resist his soulmate. He will take whatever Lan Wangji is willing to give him. ------ A "missing scene" of sorts from episode 43 of The Untamed. The pan out over the Jingshi with their song playing felt very much to me like a subtextual sex scene. So I wrote that hypothetical scene.
~*~
🔒 For good
by apathyinreverie (@apathyinreverie)
M, 6k, Wangxian & Xiyao | Kay's Rec
Summary: Wangji should have seen this coming. (Kind of mafia AU. Where the Jins are their usual treacherous selves but Wei Ying is perfectly capable of getting revenge. Which they absolutely deserve. For having made his Lan Zhan so much as frown.)
~*~
🔒 Bright the Day We Met
by ereshai (@ereshai)
G, 1k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: Xichen wasn’t even sure Wangji was open to finding his soulmate. The mechanism of soulmate matching was inexact and open to misinterpretation. It was very frustrating. Wangji had always preferred certainty.
~*~
💙 Lay my body down
by tawaen
M, 54k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: One of the fragments of Wei Wuxian's soul, splintered during the first siege of the Burial Mounds, uses the energy released by the Yin Tiger Tally and flees backwards through time to another moment where Wei Wuxian was close to death – after the fall of Lotus Pier, at the hands of Jiang Wanyin. Knowing how his first life will end, Wei Wuxian decides to hide his survival, and leave the cultivation world behind.
~*~
The White Jade Hairpin
by YilingSani (@yiling-sani)
G, 1k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: Happy Birthday, dear Hanguang-Jun!
~*~
Tell Me To Stay
by YilingSani (@yiling-sani)
G, 14k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: With heavy steps, Wei Ying walks back to the living room and plops down on the sofa again. His silver eyes travel around the room for a while, mind flooded by memories of sunny mornings, meals and cosy evenings together and all the surfaces they fucked each other on. Then they stop at the door of Lan Zhan's study. If he walked out right now... If Lan Zhan walked out right now and spoke to him, Wei Ying would throw the backpack away, hold his boyfriend close and never let him go. He begs. He begs it would happen. He begs Lan Zhan to somehow feel how much on the edge Wei Ying is balancing right now. "Please," he whispers - the tightening feeling in his throat is slowly choking him while the silver eyes threaten to fill with tears. "Please, Lan Zhan."
~*~
Heart of hearts
by apathyinreverie (@apathyinreverie)
M, WIP, Series, 40k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: It won't be until several days later that Wangji will know to be grateful for Jiang Wanyin’s insistence to split up in their search. (Or, JC and LWJ spend those months searching separately and LWJ ends up finding Wei Ying a little earlier. Wei Ying who doesn’t remember anything beyond his own name. So, LWJ takes his chance and takes Wei Ying home. To Gusu.)
~*~
💙🔒 your heart is mine to fortify
by sunflowersfield
G, 2k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: A few mornings later, Wei Ying stares up at his ceiling and listens to the wind blowing through the willow tree outside his window. It is 4:15 a.m. and he is wide awake once more. For a while, the howling wind is the only sound he hears, and then, there is movement from somewhere below him. The opening and closing of cabinet doors. Light footsteps tapping on a hardwood floor. The clanging of metal against glass. Lan Zhan has arrived at the bakery. Wei Ying allows himself to be swept away by the symphony of sounds that Lan Zhan unknowingly creates as he begins his day. His breathing slows, and his body relaxes bit by bit. He imagines that he is listening to a lullaby written just for him. And just like a lullaby, the symphony guides him back to sleep. Or: Wei Ying lives in the apartment above Lan Zhan's bakery. Or part 2: Wei Ying learns how to accept Lan Zhan's help.
~*~
Brand New Moves
by tawaen
T, 7k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: In the most ambitious heist ever planned, Team Rocket attempts to steal two legendary Pokémon – one from the Burial Mounds Gym Leader, Wei Ying; and one from the Snow White Pavilion Gym Leader, Lan Zhan. These two former rivals are paired up to battle against one another for the first time since becoming Gym Leaders! Will they be able to defeat Team Rocket? Or will they loose their composure and their Pokémon? (Just joking, Wei Ying and Lan Zhan never even notice Team Rocket. They only have eyes for each other!)
~*~
marital customs
by shijieswife
M, WIP, 2k, Wangxian | Kay's Rec
Summary: Cangse, with the growing up on a mountain under the hand of an immortal cultivator who had not descended in several hundred years, often has not a clue, about a single one of the customs down the mountain. She has very little idea of customs, or respect for them, despite her decades living down from the mountain. And this, unlike other things, is something Changze has no experience in either - the art of dealing with suitors for your first born child’s hand.
~*~
(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for these hard-working authors if you like – or think others might like – these stories.)
#wangxian fic rec#wangxianficrecs#rewind 2024#the untamed#wangxian#fandom event#long post#Kay's Rec#Kay's Favorite#The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation#MDZS#Mo Dao Zu Shi#December 2024
188 notes
·
View notes