#i have a seasonal depression

[ghosted-jazz]

Species Swap AU! Retired couple gets a fairy godchild to help repair their relationship

[miiukkaa]

i wanna hear him give absolutely horrible speeches (everyone would go apeshit nonetheless)

[katificer]

WHY ARE THEY ALL SUFFERING *banging desk* LEAVE MY GUYS ALONE

[ode2rin]

i'm taking it fucking back . i finally had the time to listen to taylor swift's "you're losing me" and now all i think of is rin . my precious emo boy .

imagine begging rin, just for once, to choose you and your relationship. you, ever so patient you, giving him all the time he needs, holding him tight when he unclasps your hands (you fucking bet i'm not just talking about your hands), closing your eyes shut when his words are piercing you straight from the heart.

begging rin, for perhaps the last time, to say something. even just one more i love you will suffice. even one more tender glance will be enough of a reason to stay despite the million glares telling you to leave.

and god, he's looking at you like he almost wants to do as you beg. but that was just it. almost. and fuck that, because no one deserves an almost. no one deserves something halfway. especially not you, that loved him amidst the fleeting moments of brilliance and the indelible scars of his darkest hours.

so you leave. with a heart half beating. dragging your feet slowly making your way to the door. just in a slow pace because a part of you holds on to the hope that rin will come to his senses. that he'll think of you and the life you shared. and that he will reach out and embrace you, but it never happens.

and that's the moment you knew what decision he made.

new silk bed sheets, face masks, a kuromi pj set, a tub of ice cream, the lavender candle guys i think i'm mentally stable now so long friends bye ❤️‍🔥

[micarps]

If you died out here in the snow, who would even miss you ?

[fusionsprunt]

Hunter, Year 4036

[poisonousquinzel]

they deserved better idc 😐

[creekfiend]

I have this concept of like, a bunch of sirens that lure you into the rocks and crush you to death but they don't mean to and they are actually just trying to help they just suck so bad at helping that every time they end up shipwrecking a bunch of people on jagged rocks and then they're like. not again. how does this keep happening

they are a metaphor for the immune system and also. for OCD. thank you for your time

[hermanoga]

One of the best things 'The Eye' and 'Lull' have done is helping me reinterpret the romantic under(?!)tones of the previous openings and endings without any weird guilt (of forcing my gay agenda on anything, which I know is idiotic but anyway). Go back and listen to Vortex, Dive Back in Time and The Tides, everything falls into place all of a sudden. And ALSO, read the damn lyrics of Overthink!

ps : I forgot Break and Flash - the gayest gay ones. I will discuss if I want later :3

Yingdu is standing there with a scythe or something as I write this but I am actually feeling very content right now. Oh, also! found a theory on twitter thread titled This isn’t the dead wife you’re looking for: how Link Click leverages the “dead wife” trope for CXS while actively subverting it (bro wrote an almost academic paper, delicious arguments really, a similar discussion I was having with a friend the other day) which really makes a lot of sense! The form and content aligns very perfectly if we keep that theory in mind.

Edit : Some more Shiguang ramblings I posted.

I have tears in my Shiguang eyes cause I skipped lunch to edit this, I am hungry and I feel like crying.

[transmascrage]

"If we removed all social expectations for men and women that give people insecurities and labels and gender roles there would be less trans people in the world!"

And what if there were more? What then?

Listen I know it's usually well-meaning allies saying that, but it's really not as nice as you think it is when you imply we exist because of oppressive gender roles, and you hope for a world where there'd be less of us.

(Also it makes you sound like a TERF)

[softiedingo]

everytime i remember that my future depends on me:

[midnightcatharsis]

CaitVi fans: Oh no, they really made Cait hit Vi and sleep with Maddie… How can this pairing possibly recover from cheating and domestic abuse? It's doomed…

Meanwhile JayVik fans after Jayce sleeps with another person, breaks every promise he has ever given to Viktor and violently murders him, seemingly with no regret, guilt or inner struggle, without even trying to talk to him one last time:

[ladyzayinwonderland]

friends, romans, mutuals, what are some ways you find joy in this time of early nightfall?

[house-of-hamartia]

"Siúil, siúil, siúil a rún Siúil go sochair agus siúil go ciúin Siúil go doras agus éalaigh liom Is go dté tú mo mhúirnín slán."

Siúil A Rúin

--------------------

Hiyo everyone.

Just passing by to share a small thing I did today.

If you have been with me for a while, you know that I suffer from very vivid nightmares and night terrors that usually worsen with my anxiety, to the points that I awake more often than not my poor husband, who is the only one that can actually calm me down and anchor me. I hate them, because they are so vivid, so dishorienting, that just leave me terrified.

So, it's to the surprise of no one that Dora suffers from the same exact thing, and hers, pretty much like mine, is connected to PTSD and, pretty much like mine with my husband, even her nightmares revolve around her fear of losing Shay.

She is terrified to the bone that something might happen to him: be it the Assassins or the wrath of the ocean, she is just petrified at the idea that he might never be alive in this world again.

So, more often than not, she wakes up drenched in sweat, calling for Shay. And of course, without fail, Shay's arms are around her the moment she opens her eyes, and tries to soothe her into at least realizing that she is not dreaming anymore but she is awake again.

I like to imagine that he would sing to her "Siúil A Rúin" to help her calm down, giving her his voice as guide to sort of snap her out of it and anchor her to him once more.

It's not easy, and the first few times Shay had witnessed one of her terrors, it left him more shook than he wanted to admit.

But with time and patience (and Theda's help), he eventually managed to learn what to do for his Dora. And I am happy to say that he is the only one that can actually manage to calm her down completely.

Well, I hope you will like this.

Also, here, have a small close up because I actually like how they turned out.

--Nemo

[kurthummeldeservesbetter]

I literally cannot wait until Jayce (former partner/brother/friend/gay lover?) Heimerdinger (former boss) and Singed (mentor? weird dude Viktor liked for like a small portion of childhood/) see Jesus!Viktor.

like. Jayce has *seen* Viktor and knows somethings up but did get dumped like a minute after Viktor woke up and then Heimerdinger was breaking into the lab with Ekko, then they proceeded to go have guys night while tripping on hexcore runes.

so like. i want him to see Viktor in action. like curing shimmer addicted people and shit. heimerdinger is probably gonna be like wtf (if they ever do meet again, i think there will be a connection between whats going on with the hexcore/runes/ekko's tree and what Viktor can now do).

singed seems busy being fucking dr.frankenstein so who the hell knows. $5 he hears viktor is now a religious figure for zaun and is like right on man *gets back to unholy experiments and crimes against nature*

my guesses for what is actually going to happen:

there will be at least 1 point in questioning if he (jayce) and/or his new boy band have to kill viktor cause clearly somethings going on and while healing people is great it also seems to be very cultish and also probably going to have horrible effects at some point. untimately this is solved by viktor and jayce reuniting and running off to live together in weird ass harmony

but they decide against it and fix whatever influence the hexcore seems to be having on viktor and it stops the weird magic cult thing but viktor is forever stuck Like That so instead Jayce/Viktor are now Galinda/Elphaba (topical)

viktor helps heal the tree???? feels like it could happen

Jinx/Sevika are ignoring whatever is going on in the cult because they dont have time for that, plus it keeps the shimmer addicts out of their hair while they start a revolution

the tree either dies/is healed only in part 3

ekko regrets ever involving topside and only enjoys it cause he got a weird immortal friend out of it and maybe a tree fix

topside only ever hears rumors of said viktor jesus cult and is just so confused

[calamaroo]

KWAZII RACKHAM REDESIGN 🐈

& IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT‼️

(please read, I'd appreciate it)

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH 🧡

Here lately, as you can tell if you've been around for my blog, I've been struggling to post. Part of the reason is I've just not been happy with my art style and designs. SO, in hopes to remedy this, I wanted to redesign my little meow meow man!!

I feel like I struggle really badly with same face syndrome, so I want my new style to focus more on different face and body structures/types!

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Design Elements :

The green eyes stuck out too much to me (sensory overload kinda deal), so I made them yellow! I feel it flows better with the oranges everywhere else!

Sharper angles that point inwards!

Actually looks like a human that can turn into a cat! --- I want my "human" designs to have more animal features because that's what I like about them the most! (My human designs are meant to be shifters/can turn back into the original animal species, but I forget to say that a lot)

I haven't liked the way the uniforms look, so that may also change, too. I just haven't gotten to it yet.

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IMPORTANT‼️ (at least to me)

Now, on a more serious note. Since I started tumblr, I got decently popular way quicker than I expected, and the little bit of stardom and fame got to my head. I loved (and still do) seeing people interacting with my art, especially the bigger name people of the Octo-fandom. Not to get too personal, but I've struggled with my self-esteem for as long as I can remember (sucks ass, but it is what it is). On top of that, seasonal depression is kicking my ass, and it started to seriously stress me out seeing the notifications decline. It's silly, and I'm super embarrassed about it, but it's better to let it out than bottle it in, and I've already done damn well enough of that, and I'm sick of pretending.

I love all the support and praise I get about my art. It feels like that's the only thing I'm good at, so it's very personal to me. It's my way of coping with a shitty world. I've thought a lot about it, and I want to start not caring so much about seeing the notes and stuff. I still LOVE and appreciate them. It's nice beyond words to see people actually like my stuff.

IM NOT LEAVING TUMBLR, btw. I love it WAY too much to do that 😅 I just felt like finally saying something. I shouldn't feel the need to explain myself to randoms on the internet, but eh, it is what it is. Can't win them all.

If you read all that, thank you so much!!! Please do not feel responsible for my mental health, it's mine, and I need to fix it my own way.

I hope you liked my Kwazii redesign! I want to redo everyone eventually, but I'm not sure how soon I'll get to it. Tryna focus on mental sanity rn

Byeeee, and thanks for reading my goofy little half silly cat man half vent post !