#i have a list of instructions
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Tooth gone
#adios mother fucker#wisdom tooth grew in wrong and my dentist was sweating trying to get it out#i have a list of instructions#and im so eely#eepu#eepy#mcgucko#fik#fuUC
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does anybody else feel like a lot of sso's features aren't fully implemented lately? for example the championship season pass thing, I think that was so hidden. for no reason. i've had multiple people tell me they didn't even know it existed until somebody told them about it. and that seems like such a big flaw for a timed event and brand new feature?? i also felt very thrown into the deep end with the collections lately. both gm bee's bees and erissa's dolls didn't tell you anything about what you had to do! i loved the stars, i adored the spiders, this would be right up my alley. but all the confusion ruins it for me! why doesnt sso tell us how many things we have to collect? what's the diary even for if they don't add the new collection quests to it? i loved it as a way to keep track of your progress and get hints of the areas of the collectables you're still missing. the way it is right now it just incentivizes looking up guides instead of trying :(
#star stable#star stable online#sso#ssoblr#starstable#is anybody else stressed out?#i shouldnt have to make lists for all the collections to keep track myself#right??#it makes it so hard to take your time with that stuff#also not knowing if its a quests you can take your time with or if you're gonna need it to continue the story line next update#ALSO the fact that you cant look up anything about it again!! after talking to bee once theres no way to get the instructions again#let alone MORE info if you need it??#thats basic game design#a quest - especially a long collection quest - should not vanish from the quest log after i start it#i should not be able to forget a quest if i dont play for a month!!
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Just read a fic with Akutagawa struggling to read and it's such an exceptional characterization tidbit, I really wish more people would take it into consideration. For real: he's been living in the most miserable conditions most of his life, and it's implied in canon he never had the chance to attend proper education up to at least 14; it only makes sense he would stumble to process written text. Seriously, less of savvy Akutagawa and more illiterate Akutagawa. In my opinion it also makes a nice symbolic juxtaposition with his irl counterpart, to have a character who's barely able to read when the original is one of the most important authors of Japanese literature.
#I'd say “back on my Akutagawa is stupid” agenda#Except I don't really feel like saying it's him being stupid when not getting an instruction is something that was never up to him#But it may contribute to why he's so naive and relatively easy to manipulate (by Dazai‚ Mori‚ Atsushi‚ Chuuya‚ the list is long... )#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bsd official art#mine#q.#13/06/23#And I know this is directly contradicted in Beast. But it makes a lot more sense if you ask me.#Who would have even cared to teach him how to read anyway
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I know I've posted about nothing but my job lately, but I am really struggling right now...
I honestly think one of the greatest failures of our modern education system is that teachers are expected to exhibit patience and forgiveness beyond anything that would be expected in other career fields.
Genuinely, I think the world would be a lot more functional (and better educated) currently if teachers were just allowed to be a little more real with students and tell them that, yeah, actually, it's not acceptable to continue making the same mistake after being corrected on it twelve times.
Of course, I fully understand instructors cannot expect students to master concepts they're never been taught.
But if a concept or rule has been clearly communicated to the student multiple times, it is honestly just not reasonable to expect a high grade while still continuing to make all the same mistakes. If a student refuses to learn the material, they just shouldn't pass. If I give a student a step-by-step video walk-through for how to handle basic formatting and they still fuck it up because they didn't bother to even watch the video, they should lose points. Like is that rocket science???
Imagine being a cashier, being taught the proper procedure for closing out a register multiple times, and then still fucking it up every single time you have to close.
Would you be employed as a cashier for very long? No!
Man, I don't even know. I know I'm just ranting at this point because I'm disappointed, but... Really, I do think that teachers should just be allowed to be a little more real. Sometimes calling people out for not putting in the minimum effort is fair.
If a student makes the same basic mistake after I've corrected them 20 times, it should be socially acceptable for me to tell them to stop wasting my time--and wasting their own time--in a class they don't intend to learn anything from.
I'm so tired...
#irl stuff#don't get me wrong#there are so many rewards to teaching#but the current college environment is actually insane#students literally come into literature classes#fully planning to never read a single word#of either the assigned readings#OR EVEN THE ASSIGNMENT INSTRUCTIONS#god save me#this brought to you by my summer students#even after I provided them a SPECIFIC bullet point list of which readings have their titles in italics and which are in quotation marks#and then posted this list as a class announcement#THEN sent it as a class message#THEN sent it to their student email accounts#90% of them STILL fucked it up in their essays#LIKE NO OFFENSE#but why are you even in a college class if you have no desire to pay attention to any information provided in the class???#if the first piece of advice I give you on your rough draft is that you misspelled the MAIN character's name#and then you turn in a final draft where the name is STILL misspelled#I should legally be allowed to roll up your essay and beat you with it#just saying
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taking a painting class - Abstract Acrylics - and I'm not the biggest fan of the instruction. The guy seems to maybe be "good at a thing in a way which blinds you to the learning of it" - he'll put a bunch of examples on slides at the start of each class but then not really go through what makes each one work. He doesn't really demonstrate techniques, and if I ask a question like "how would you choose an interesting composition for this" or "how would you choose a light color for this palette" he usually responds with what he would do and not why. I've tried asking more-clearly-general questions and have failed to get an answer about, like, strategies or tools one can use.
But the thing which really bonkers my jonkers is that he keeps saying "just make it abstract."
"It doesn't have to be good. Just go really abstract."
"What I like about this one is that it's very abstract."
"You can start with a sketch and then make it really abstract."
ask about how to make it abstract - "just make it abstract."
ask him "what's really distinctive about these flowers is all of their tiny little buds and blooms - how do you suggest I represent that structure in an abstract way?" and get something like "well look at the shapes and then make it abstract"
sir. monsieur. please give me more to work with than that
#I have not figured out a way to phrase a question that arrives me at the answer I'm looking for#also smaller kvetch: he listed a handful of Very Specific materials for the class to bring to the first day#as specific as “this brand#these three brush sizes“#and “this brand of paint#these six colors“#“this exact size of palette knife”#and i was like i guess he wants us to have specific things to follow along with examples?#i wouldn't have made those specific purchases were i not instructed to#then first day of class 'oh u can use whatever brushes whatever paints. i like this size of palette knife' Not even the size he said to buy#miffed. should have trusted my judgment#it's nice to have dedicated Painting Time but i wish i was Learning
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...
#bleh. i need half the country to pls stop being on fire. id like to go out and run pls. but its so smokey i can barely see the mountain#i live near :-/ also im just tired and frustrated. its incredible how quickly i vasilate between#things r going well. i should stay in my program and work with cyanos forever. to no no no im not cut out for this. i gotta leave. to yay#let me throw myself head first into consuming every second of my life with working. but only on the things that dont require me to think#which is y im not cut out for this and should be bannished to a world of only doing lab work and following instructions#also i have an screening interview monday for an R0DBT group. so i might b going to control freak classes#assuming i cant convince the lady that im not fit for thr class. which obviously i am bc im my therapist listed the ppl who r#usually put into r0dbt and i was like hm im a lot of those things. but also its 2hrs every week and thats a lot of time. and i feel like im#already on the path away from violently structuring my life specifically bc ive done so much damage#ugh. also i have ridiculously high self standards but i only do anything halfway bc i cant fail if i never try 100%.#so im like a fake control freak. or rather i cant even fully commit to being controlling. im lazy and i dont have the drive.#which almost makes it worse bc im stading at this threshold of control where it destroys me but never actually succeeds in being a perfect#thing. which is def a distorted way to think about it but there u go. ugh. im just tired and my arm hurts too much to draw bc#im older and older everyday. and i dont wanna read papers. i dont wanna grade or work on my presentation. i didn't want to spend 3.5 hrs#doing transfers this morning. and my mom's been dead for 6months and 3 days now. and i still dont kno where ill be a year from now#unrelated
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a mocha pudding recipe
put
1/2c butter 1c sugar 1Tbsp cocoa powder
in a double boiler; bring water to a boil, heat until butter is melted
remove butter from heat then beat in
8 egg yolks
until no streaks remain, then add
1/2c fresh coffee
mix thoroughly, then return to double boiler; cook, stirring constantly, until desired thickness
i adapted this from the joy of cooking recipe for the filling of a lemon tart; once my oven is working right I intend to make a mocha tart. thing, but until it is working right, baking anything even slightly fiddly is a crapshoot
anyway. it's v rich and firm and i'm sure you could whip it full of air and have a light fluffy chocolate/coffee pudding but i like it dense so i didn't
#anyway uhh. this is all volumes i have no idea what the weights for any of these are. 1c is about 240ml and 1tbps is about 15ml#in case you're cooking in a metric kitchen and want to try this out#you'd prolly be fine just using 15g of cocoa powder and 240g of butter?#the recipe format is how joy of cooking presents it and it is the superior recipe format i will not be taking questions at this time#when i was a kid the first time i saw a recipe formatted with the big block of ingredience at the start i just dumped everything in a bowl#and ruined the recipe#bc my formative cooking experience was cooking out of joy of cooking where each ingredient is listed at the time of use#if you like it more chocolate less coffee i'm sure you could replace some or all of the coffee with another liquid like water or milk#i'd probably up the cocoa content if i tried that on account of ''some of the flavor is coming from the coffee''#and you need to replace it with something#edited to add four words to an instruction and make it more clear#cooking#recipe#recipes#pudding recipe#tubmlr cooking
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#can someone tell me that going away this weekend wont kill my cat#i have written a list of instructions and schedules that are 6 pages long#and I have a backup plan incase my roommate cant give him his gabapentin#and if he starts getting really sick I have someone who can drive him to the vet#i just feel so terrible for leaving him during this time but hes been doing okay😭
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FINDING A RECORDING OF THE ANIMALS COVERING "LET IT BE" DURING THEIR 70s REUNION WAS NOT ON MY 2024 BINGO CARD.
#ANGELINA WHEN YOU SEE THIS PLEASE DM ME I HAVE TO SEND YOU A LIST OF IMPORTANT INSTRUCTIONS#ACTUALLY FALLING ONTO THE GROUND IN TEARS AND HYSTERICS AND A PUDDLE OF DR PEPPER#NOT TO MENTION ERIC SINGING TWO SONGS THAT ALAN WROTE. WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT HOW HAD I NOT PUT THE PIECES TOGETHER YET#ggGGhGHGHGHhghhg#things i said today#ALL BECAUSE THE ANIMALS RELEASED A RANDOM EP ON YOUTUBE THAT FEATURED ERIC SINGING A SONG FROM ALAN'S SELF-TITLED ALBUM#SEPTEMBER 20TH 2024 MARK THIS DOWN IN YOUR HISTORY BOOKS AS A DAY CONNIE EXPLODED
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#tydeblogging#no futher instructions just choose your fave from this list#i promise i dont have a skitty bias it being here again is a coincidence
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⚠️ for them ALLLLL!
- @zeebreezin
Warning:
Ockham: Holds long grudges.
Roberts: Has shrimp neuroses.
Nite: Will sell you to January for one corn chip.
Tamara: Will agree to what you say with no intention of doing it to avoid hurting your feelings.
Jones: Utterly useless in a high-stress situation.
Rubbery Barber Surgeon: For the love of fuck do not try to pay in amber.
Graham: Girl, run.
#ockham#roberts/nite#tamara#jones#rubbery barber surgeon#graham#some bonus advice#if you're on ockham's good side your tether for stupidity is pretty long#you'll be fine#just be polite to roberts and if you're a sequencer do what he says and you shouldn't have a problem#you could even push back on something if you try to explain to him why something isn't advisable or if there's a better way and he'll liste#he's reasonable just unpleasant#tamara means well so she will agree or make promises because that's what you want to hear#and it'll make you happier to hear it#and just keeps pushing it down the line#it's not ill-intended she's just trying not to upset people#at least in the short term#if there's a medical emergency you'll need to yell clear instructions directly at jones#unambiguous commands would likely work#but there's still a good chance he'd stay frozen#he's often paralysed in situations where his choices will have long-reaching consequences#if you can read the sign and not be an asshole around the barber surgeon you'll manage just fine#and graham is what red flags were made for#there is no way to win with graham#don't even bother#(do bother because i personally find it funny)#roberts
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How did you think up each of your concept for your Robo Fizz OCs? Like go in-depth about the choices you made, why you chose their names and such. I want details.
Questions about the fizzies || Accpeting
Oh that's a juicy one… and lengthy too, let's see where we can start. This got so fucking long holy shit pick your fav section idk I'm so rambly-
The very first muse I made was Factory Fizzy, or FF-8842. I can say right away that their factory name, which is the only name they go by, doesn't actually mean anything! I just think it's cute, I really love the number 8. In hindsight, 42 I can make the argument being a subconscious nod to “A hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy”, a book series I loved when I was a teen. 42 is the meaning of life, and FF-8842 is struggling to find the meaning of their life.
But most of all, Four-Two, or Fou-Too, just sounds cute.
They were originally made for a comic that I wanted to draw for the song The Fine Print by The Stupendium, sometimes I just get brainworms when I fixate, and I end up drawing lengthy comics to songs I like. I needed a fizzy to work in the Fizzy Factory for the song, so I made a fizzy with a simple design, clothes with no dyes, “horns” without fabric on them, basically a fizzy that didn't need to catch anyone's eye, nor drain resources and money. This is also why while they're quite strong, they're only 4’1”.
Now I play a lot on the idea of a fizzy that was created with a strong sense of self, of sentience, as soon as they were created. Usually it takes my fizzies a few years to reach sentience, if they ever do… but FF-8842 is a “defect” always at the verge of being scrapped for being too much of a free-thinker. This definitely evolved from the original comic, where they clearly do not possess the same distant look in their eyes as the other fizzies.
The second fizzy I made was The Manager. His name was originally just Office Fizzy, which I later weaved into his backstory instead. I actually asked my friends how I should refer to him, and they liked the simplicity of The Manager, and I think while it might be a little bit of a mouthful, it's oozes just what kind of person he is.
He is the Manager. He makes sure this clock is turned up and ticking.
For the comic, he was originally more of a guide for new fizzies, and of course the one doing the singing/talking in the comic, and if you want a good idea of what his inspiration was, look no further than the song itself. It's all there. Eventually Manager evolved into something different. He became, well, less someone handling the papers in an office, and more of an actual… manager, of the factory.
The idea to make it all Entirely fizzy-made tickled me, and so I tweaked his story a little bit, having him climb from an “Office Fizzy”, to being where he is now, so successful he even managed to alter his own design, which no fizzy of his model has done before… he even owns his own fizzies. Has businesses outside the factory (not to Mammon's knowledge but yknow-) making big cash and giving into greed because of the influence from Mammon, by simply being made in his image, and giving into it. A success story for the ages. He is a control-freak at this point though, to make sure he doesn't lose it all.
I also gave him an Australian accent because he's spending way too much time around Mammon. That's just a fun fact ♡ Also all the green and gold in his clothes also point to how closely he works with Mammon.
Mortis had his name change many times. He went from simply Undertaker, and I considered Morty Briefly… but decided against it real quick. I went with Mort for a while… but I just loved the way Mortis sounded. I know it's wormed into my brain because of Faith (don't ask me about the plot of that game I don't Know) but Mortis just felt Right. Mortis is the Latin noun for Death.
Mortis also came from The Fine Print. There's a section of the song that goes like this;
“If you'd rather drop dead, that's fine
But you know that dropping down dead bears a fine
So you do your job and I'll do mine
I gotta meet a six-foot deep bottom line”
And I don't know, it just fired off my creative juices like… what if there was an undertaker fizzy? That'd be so cool… and so out there xhdbbd. I have always had a complicated relationship with death, so I enjoy writing morticians because of their various different ways to approach the subject. Mortis started off approaching it quite casually… It's hell after all, but the more I wrote him?
I got to put myself in his head and how he was thinking, his life-philosophy, how me having placed him in Wrath affected his outlook, and now he's become almost philosophical, now he's holding sermons in Satan's name and I believe he puts his own beliefs into them… and despite having such a sad job, and how he has to face such misery and grief every day… It's somehow helped him become the most at peace fizzy I've got. Because he understands life and death better than any other fizzy, while also getting to be on his own and expressing and exploring himself best a fizzy can.
He is heavily inspired by the Undertaker in The Backwater Gospel, who is quiet and non-threatening, but his mere presence is enough to send you into a panic.
Why is he here?
Who’s going to die?
He's also heavily inspired by the YouTube channel Little Bubby Child since he's from Wrath and all. I will meme on him til the day I die.
Mizzy got her name from Maid Fizzy, you smoosh the names together you get Mizzy. For a while I also had Dolly as a suggestion, but it didn't really stick with my followers. So it's kinda become a nickname certain fizzies who knew her before the memory-wipe call her, like Thizzy and The Manager.
Mizzy was always meant to be a companion bot, I wanted a fizzy that actually did what the commercial advertised the fizzies to do. I made her a maid because I wanted to play around with her owner being a weeb, and I simply wanted to dress her up in cute little outfits that I knew a guy with his own companion bot would want to see. In time the idea of her once having belonged to Burnie Burnz, Fizzarolli's stalker, wormed itself into my brain… and the misery tripled from there.
I think it was because I wrote out a scene with a friend where I played him briefly before he got eaten by a sandworm (shoutout Beetlejuice the OG), and I recalled his line regarding the fizzies not getting him off right. I wondered what kind of shit a disgusting guy like him would even do to a fizzy if he planned on murdering Fizzarolli, so I, unfortunately, made Mizzy his fizzybot. The only solution was the memory wipe… and that's why she's so head empty most of the time. Her programming is protecting her from remnants at all times.
I really wanted to show how messed up the companion bot situation is with Mizzy, which is why she's been used sparingly. I love a good healing story though, so I've tried to bring her in more where she gets to regain her power and independence and tweaked her current owner to be a little less awful to give her a break… but still awful nonetheless. She's always ripe for fizzy-adoption.
Ginger has changed so much from the original concept. At first she was named Fuzzy, for a fussy fizzy. Then later when I switched up his design, opting for the red design in the commercial I thought looked neat as hell, I decided to go with Ginger instead. It just sounded right, all things considered.
Ginger started out as Fuzzy, who was heavily inspired by Sun from FNAF to be perfectly honest. I have 3 Sun OCs very near and dear to my heart, and I love writing anxious nervous wrecks… so that's what I did for a while. Eventually I leaned into him snapping more and more, running out of patience like Brandon Roger's Mom character, and as I wrote them in IC group chats, I realised more and more that Fuzzy was actually rarely if ever anxious… they were mostly stressed and Irritated.
And I was never happy with the original design… it was cute but didn't spark joy, it felt hasty. I spotted the design in the commercial I liked the most, and I remade everything.
Now Ginger is Something Else Entirely.
She's tired, he's pissed, he's at his wits end, and they're Dangerous if you look at them wrong. They became a Mama Bear, while also something of a Big Sister character… grumpy and with a resting bitch face… but a heart of gold below the surface.
I wanted to explore the fizzy for the kids and teens, the meaningless chores that fizzies have to perform for demons like carrying bags and making dinner and other kinds of butler-stuff, and just how straining tiring and meaningless it all felt, all while Also being a companion for the adults.. Despite Mizzy, Ginger has turned into the fizzy that's the absolute most disappointed with their lot in life, and hates Fizzarolli just about as much as Pinwheel. This is also why they are siblings in the human AU, they've got much in common.
Thizzy is simple. Therapist+Fizzy=Thizzy. Briefly he was called Shrinky, but I left it instead as a nickname he got from Doc, which he absolutely despises, because I could Not take it seriously.
Thizzy was taken from the commercial, I interpreted his neutral face as one of absolute indifference, and I figured this is Hell and this is Mammon so… originally he was meant to not give a rat’s ass about anybody, especially not his patients. However while writing my muse page for this blog, I had him write out short “profiles” for the other fizzies… and I thought Hey… what if he checked up on the fizzies too?
Now he's part of a larger process that The Manager runs where he checks up on the fizzies on the regular to make sure they're doing fine physically but also mentally (at least well enough to perform their tasks), and in time I found that Thizzy actually did care…
He cared too much, which is why he tried to not care at all. Because the alternative was to let it all get to you… Despite not wanting to get involved, it's in his programming to do so, and he's got a good heart, albeit only metaphorically.
Now he's just so tired... and working in the Sloth Ring doesn't help this.
His relationship with Doc is the result of when he was still in his early years and just performed his tasks as he was programmed to do… and now he's stuck in this unhealthy toxic relationship where he has to make sure Doc is happy all the damn time. Luckily for him, he mostly is. At least as a robot-
Finally, Doc! Doc is easy enough, he's Doc because he's a doctor! I did consider Doccy but it reminded me of. Another word, so I backtracked bxhrhe. I worried it'd be too generic but… it just fits. He's Doc. Nothing else fits like Doc does ♡
I just stared at the screen when Doctor Fizzy came on. Those colours. That Forced Grin, those soft little cheeks… that blank fucking stare. This was an unhinged doctor-character and I needed him in my life. My cringe, emo, deviantart-browsing, gore-loving, Higurashi-watching, Hatoful Boyfriend-playing, problematic teenage-self... they needed this.
He hasn't actually changed much at all. He was always inspired by those crazy doctors you see in anime, games and horror movies. Their silly giggles and the over the top surgeries and bone saws and all that stuff.. he's my horror and gore-character, for when I want to write a bit of this and that, which I do find a lot of fun.
I don't know what really made him as flamboyant as he is… I think just the nature of him being a crazy doctor character while also being a sex bot… and when I discovered the Bubblegum Coquette aesthetic- and in time I developed his relationship with Thizzy. His clinginess opened up the idea of how he's probably not got a lot of connections because of how “intense” he is, and while he's not quite as sentient as the rest… he's getting there, every time he reflects on how lonely he is.
His only way to connect with others was by keeping body parts of whomever he operated on, that was All he was ever able to get his hands on fair and square(?).. and he started getting unhealthily attached to those parts. Now he actively seeks them out because it's the only form of love and attachment he understands so far, and if he gets attached to people to a strong degree, there's a chance it turns into love/obsession, which will push him further into sentience, and so on now we have a yandere too.
Cringe.
But at least I'm free.
He's the perfect example of when a robot is Not taught how humans and emotions actually work, and now he's already registered what he knows as truths and facts.
Imma not cover Imposter too much cus really I just got inspired by that That's not my neighbour-song before I even knew there was a game, and I wanted to make a strong fizzy for quite some time, that could work as Manager's bodyguard to make him pose more of a threat than he did on his own. I loved the black and white aesthetic because of absolute neutrality, and my fiance mentioned that it looked like a pierrot and I was like Hell yeah accidental pierrot let's go-
They obviously has a bit of Ennard from FNAF in them, or the Mimic or whatever that new enemy is called... I think it's a pretty natural robot-plot device at this point. It is a fun bot to play in group chats where I can pretend to be my other muses and wait and see how long it takes my fellow muns to realise there's a question mark at the end of the tupper bot's username. It communicates through motions and clicks, sign language, when it isn't disguised, and is very mischievous and a troublemaker.. I dunno, the inspiration is "gremlin".
#input command [ asks ]#instruction manual [ hcs ]#see my name on the list? [ imposter fizzy ]#sorry i wasn't listening [ therapist fizzy ]#like a cheshire cat i think that you are just a grin [ doctor fizzy ]#call me baby doll [ maid fizzy ]#have you seen my son [ caretaker fizzy ]#the last man standing in our sinister charade [ undertaker fizzy ]#you should've read the fine print my friend [ manager fizzy ]#we work to earn the right to work [ factory fizzy ]#long post#this took. years
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Man, just saw a post about it, but renewed my frustration over work nonsense yesterday
Being like, oh, cool! It's disability pride month! We get to switch the displays in the store! I wanna make a really cool display right up front!!
Getting a cart to go start selecting books from our wide array of children's books, picture books, YA novels, adult fiction, nonfiction, etc that I know feature disabled characters and people and that I've seen sitting on the shelves for a while, our previous book buyer was always suuuuuper vocal about finding books w disabled characters, after all, representation just MATTERED SO MUCH to her,
And then being absolutely dumbfounded when we BARELY HAVE ANYTHING outside of characters w ADHD/Autism. MAYBE anxiety. PERHAPS a character has cancer. THE FAINTEST SUGGESTION of a wheelchair in one book. Huntington's? Question mark? In another? Conditions resulting in disfigurement/amputation? The concept could possibly exist in this book, uhh.. maybe...... anything else? Ha! Not on these shelves I fucking guess?!
Like.... we have a ton of books w queer rep! Different body types! Different skin tones! Teach your toddler about social justice! Transgender characters! Nonbinary characters! The alphabet but we're making it gay! At least one book, I think, with asexual characters! But no, we don't have our self-empowerment books anymore or the little guide to sexuality and disability, we have Buddhist monk advice for anxious people, but nooooo we DON'T have that cool book that talked about disability activism anymore, and definitely not in time for July!
I know she and I were at odds before she left, and I know my specifically putting "National month of..." prompts up on my desk calendar after she expressed it was "so difficult to find out what each month is the month of!" probably really irritated her, but I'm like. Appalled that she hadn't been ordering to restock for disability pride month since she always made such a big deal about having books like that in the store.
#venting#work stuff#she quit at the end of june#two of my coworkers and I are sorta filling in for her role while a replacement is searched for and all that#i know she put in a ton of orders before she left so I'm hoping things start to trickle in#i haven't gone thru the order submissions in detail yet to see what we're expecting#but i'll be doing that later this week#as it is today was dealing with a mess of half unpacked shipments#and correcting little mistakes here and there and leaving instructions for coworkers tomorrow#gotta say i was so... disappointed hunting for those books#i looked at the sad selection of nonfiction and self help stuff I'd found and was like. yeah i think I'd be offended#if i saw these titles all grouped together for the pride display. it just felt bad#i made a halfway decent arrangement for the children's section but it took a lot of title research#and even then like half the titles i saw in recommendation lists looked so cool and i would think#surely we should have THIS one bc it looks like the sorta thing Buyer would have ordered and it seems neat as hell!#but. uh. we would have no order history for it.#hhhrrhhrhrhrgh if i see absolutely nothing in the orders we will be expecting#I'm gonna order a bunch of books#and try to plan out the next couple of monthly themes#hmph! even if I'm not the books person I'm still gonna put in SOME effort!!
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<3 little diary post
#Reached out to the girl who has beef with me to try to apologize instead of make a scene at the next social event please clap#Like being soo mature about this :)#Hmm making my friendsgiving invites and upset that like half people from last year I don't talk to now#And like the invite list is the same length and I'm grateful for everyone but don't feel like as close yknow?#Miss *****#Anyways I think my apology will be like a -what can we do to avoid this going forward-#Because like to be so fr if I wasn't a lesbian I wouldn't have to apologize and she wouldn't be upset soooo#Just feel kinda detached and disinterested rn even though on paper everything is perfect which it is#But I guess that literally is what depression is lmao I do have the type of bipolar where I forget I have bipolar#But I getting more and more instructive thoughts and like yikes i hate it here -in my mind-#Wait so the girl I am trying to apologize to hasn't responded to me but ***** is trying to apologize??? Girl --#Might use part of her apology if I do actually meet up with the girl I am supposed to say sorry to bc it's a good amount of detached lmao
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baking never feels more like science to me than when i'm trying to cobble together an intricate multi step recipe together from several different recipes and tutorials online because the recipe I'm imagining doesn't exist....
#genuinely feels like a science experiment making something fancier than a frosted layer cake#have to do all kinds of volume and weight conversions because one recipe is japanese and the other is indian and the other is english lmfao#none of the recipes are probably the exact volume I need so i might have to make some minis with my extra stuff#i have to find a very precise sheet pan size tomorrow for the patterned cake i'm gonna use as the outer bit#otherwise i'll have to make my own from parchment paper??? or tin foil??? man idk.....#i had to write out all of my instructions and ingredient lists so i don't have to go between 6 different websites tomorrow/sat#i had to do research on fucking. gelatine 😭because it's impossible to find gelatine sheets here and they're used in EVERY mousse recipe#and there's apparently a huge debate on what the ACTUAL conversion of sheet gelatine to powdered gelatine is for baking#I also had to type up like an exact order to make each component because most need a significant amount of cooling time#grayson im gonna try my hardest to make you this fancy ass lemon cake and i pray i succeed this time where i failed on my own birthday#2 yrs ago but also i think this will go better bc i'm not doing a jelly insert or a candied mirror glaze#I'm also making my own candied lemons and lemon curd even though i don't have to#mostly because i wanna try doing it and the sheer power of getting to say i made the whole thing from scratch *#minus the actual cake mix because i don't have a good from scratch cake track record and box mixes are so so reliable#and i have too many moving parts to worry about finding a new cake recipe#every fucking cake recipe now is a fucking genoise sponge for SOME REASON#which is NOTORIOUSLY DIFFICULT AND A HUGE PAIN IN THE ASS BECAUSE IT USES NO RISING AGENTS#i want to throttle whoever it was that made online recipe people turn to only using variations of a genoise sponge for their cake recipes#honestly i need to maybe join the baking subreddit and ask for some good old baking/cookbooks with reliable baking recipes#ones that aren't crazy labor intensive for fucks sake i'm not a french patisserie#my stuff#it would be cool to one day have baked enough and have enough know how of how standard baking recipe components work#so i can just come up with my own recipes on my own#and just use whatever flavors i want#i feel like i would enjoy being a baker except if i had to make wedding cakes
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woooo my niece took 5 of my 13 lego sets, one of which was one of the three larger ones, so that's one huge box out of the way and i'm just glad she wanted them because like they ARE twenty years old and they look fine ofc but sometimes kids aren't gonna want stuff that isn't new and shiny ya know, but she did seem to want everything which would've been fine with me but i knew there was no way they would take all that with them, and at least i still have stuff of my own to sell, plus should get at least a cut of my brother's stuff for doing the inventory and putting together that stuff that wasn't already done
#i mentioned the hp sets and how they had been pretty much left together and he was like '....i had harry potter sets?'#which once he saw them he did think they were familiar which was some of my feeling with mine#like oh YEAH i do remember these i just didn't remember having so many#i mean between 13 sets it's really like 3 categories so i would've played with like the whole ice palace and its related sets#i do just wonder how it'll be at the store like everything is pretty much in fine shape#and probably there are people who want older stuff that's rarer and whatever now#BUT then there might be more of a demand for newer stuff at a better price or whatever idk#anyway 6 sets left in the upstairs and then the bionicles and statue of liberty are still in the attic#i'm still not convinced there couldn't be another box somewhere bc idk how to explain the few sets#that are missing so much that i can't actually do them bc even if we had gotten rid of some why would we not include the huge base or w/e#anyway we'll see! but i'm getting closer! and i did a little one this morning#that seemed to be complete it didn't list some of the pieces as extras but based on the instructions i figure they have to be#so i don't really need them like i'll include them if i find them and they're not needed for something else but yeah#anyway i can go back to fic though these first two at least are short so i may be going back to another one tomorrow#can't wait to have my room back though fr like#it is not the only thing making it feel messy because i have newer jewelry and clothes and stuff that i just have to organize and put away#but man the jewelry situation is just. it's not even having so many pieces it's like big earrings that take up a lot of space or whatever#so i just have not wanted to deal with it but it's kinda out of hand#but i can really think about that after this particular project is done#and do puzzles again oh my god i have 3 puzzles waiting for me at least#plus my mom always has a bunch to be done since everyone knows to buy her puzzles lol but that has also gotten out of hand#i wouldn't mind getting rid of a couple of mine though just bc it is like okay you do it but then you just have it and it takes up space#would be cool to have pretty ones framed tho
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