#i have a feeling. that the chapter afterwards.. is gonna be out Really Soon after i finish this chapter

[orcelito]

Oh yeah I wrote over a thousand words on the clock today (lol) so I'm now at 3.1k for ITNL chapter 14

Almost done with the first scene. There are 5 planned points I have for this chapter, though they're variable. Two of them are probably going to get trimmed down to summary sections since it's not gonna be different from canon at those parts. Two definite scenes towards the end, and two scene tidbits I wanna write but would need to place.

Trying to do this chapter justice. It's the last true pause for breath we're gonna get for a While

[lulumilkshake]

pretty little wife

pairings: g. satoru

description: he couldn’t help but show love to his pretty housewife.

warnings: gojo has a housewife kink, food play, mentions of wet dreams, non consensual photo taking, idk just sex lmfao

a/n: currently coping from chapter 225 even though ik he won’t die that easily LMAOO

gojo really couldn’t help but show love to his beautiful little housewife.

you were an angel compared to him. always fulfilling his every need all the time.

if he was hungry? you’d make him the best meal.

if he was sleepy? you’d let him take a nap on your chest, his favorite pillow.

if he wanted to fuck you? you’d of course, let him!

therefore, he had a wet dream about you last night.

you were in nothing but your sweet little apron, letting him lick buttercream off the valley of your breasts, as he pounded his fat cock into you rapidly.

as he woke up in the morning, he groaned at the feeling of his boner straining against his sweatpants.

never in his life would he think a woman would have an effect on him like this. but he couldn’t help it. who wouldn’t when you were so sweet and obedient to him?

he was about to roll over and press his hard-on against your ass but he noticed you weren’t next to him. he groaned once more that he had to get up with the feeling of blue balls.

when he got up, he rethought about his dream and the way you were moaning as he slammed his cock into you, overstimulated as his dick hit every spot inside of you.

“fuck,” he whispered out as his dick was pulsing harder at the thought of you moaning under him.

“gonna make that dream real, sweet girl” he mumbled out as he headed downstairs, palming his boner to soothe the pain a bit.

“honey..!! i have something to give you!!” he spoke cockily while he was walking down the stairs, looking for you.

while walking down stairs and through the living room, the smell of pancakes filled his nostrils.

“his pretty little housewife,” he thought. you were so cute for him. waking up so early to give him a nice breakfast.

fuck.

as he walked into the kitchen, he stared at the blessed sight that his eyes behold.

you were in nothing but panties, an apron, and his shirt, humming a sweet tune to yourself as you sway your hips.

his mouth was watering at the sight of you, he couldn’t help but palm his cock again before letting out a wolf whistle as he leaned on the doorway, trying to play it cool.

“look at you, pretty girl” he spoke teasingly as he walked torwards you.

you jumped a bit as you heard his voice, but giggled soon afterwards.

“good mornin’ sweetheart! did you wake up okay, sleepy?” you ask while giggling more, your voice filled with love for your snow white haired husband. your teasing was barely even teasing. in his eyes, you were the most innocent girl ever.

you were gonna drive him insane. your voice itself was enough to make the strongest become the weakest.

he grabs your hips, putting his head into the nape of your neck. his clothed cock is throbbing against your panties, as he whispers in your ear.

“would’ve woken up better if you were in bed next to me. then we wouldn’t have to do this now, yeah?”

before you could respond to him, he pushed you up against the counter before pulling down your panties.

“s-satoru!” you whine out as you’re surprised by his sudden advances. you let him do whatever he wants though, because after all you just want him to be happy, and he loved the feeling of knowing you thought that way about him and only him.

“i know baby, just gotta take care of this. then I’ll eat breakfast with you, okay?” he doesn’t wait for your answer though as he rips off your (his) shirt, leaving on the apron just like in his dream.

you moan out at the feeling of him ripping off your shirt. “j-just what are you trying to do, s-satoru?” you question since you noticed he didn’t take off your apron.

he ignores you as he is only focused on taking off his pants. his long cock springing out and hitting his abdomen. you drool a bit at the sight, and so does your pussy.

satoru notices this and he lets out a loud laugh. “so wet for me already, huh sweet girl? but i barely even touched you yet.” he teases you and you pout a bit at this, staring up at his tall figure with doe eyes.

fuck, seeing you liked this turned him on so much. his cock twitched at your pout. “awh don’t be like that baby,” he says squeezing your face and giving you a quick kiss before lining his cock up with the entrance of your dripping pussy.

“i always make my sweet housewife feel good, don’t i?” he says with a smile before he thrusts into your pussy hard and suddenly without warning. as he thrusted into you with precision, you were seeing stars. you were drooling everywhere, babbling out nonsense as his hips bucked into your tight cunt.

“s-satoru” was all you could scream out as he continued to pound into your pussy. he chuckled at the sight. you were so cock drunk, but not even close to how pussy drunk he was. he had to close his eyes at the sight so he wouldn’t cum so soon.

when he looked to the right, trying to take his eyes off your body so he wouldn’t cum before you, he noticed a bottle of whipped cream on the counter. he remembered his dream at this moment, and took the whipped cream bottle and stared directly at your tits. he had a shit eating grin on his face, that you could only gulp at what was gonna happen next.

you looked up at him with the whipped cream bottle in his hand, not even being able to question it because his cock kept hitting every single spot inside of you.

he cackled mischievously as he had an idea. he took the whipped cream bottle and starting spelling out, “torus cockslut” on your neck and breasts before laughing hard at the sight. he pulled out his phone without you knowing to take a picture of the slutty sight.

you didn’t know what he was laughing so hard at, but you couldn’t help but laugh (and moan) with him too. you thought he was just being wholesome and enjoying the sweet moment.. oh love, were you wrong. when was the strongest sorcerer ever wholesome when fucking you like this?

as soon as he finished up laughing, he started to lick at the whipped cream, cleaning up your body. as he did this, he continued to thrust his length into you, even rougher this time due to the sight of you almost fucked out.

he licked at your breasts like it was his last meal, paying special attention to your hard nipples. he sucked at your breasts, licking up any other spots he missed. you whimper and moan out louder at the feeling of his tongue all over your breasts and neck.

“t—too much, toru!” you clenched around his cock harder at the feeling of him pounding into you and the feeling of his tongue on you.

“fuck— squeezing around me so tight baby.” he groans out as he continues to thrust his hips into you, getting deeper at every plunge. the blunt head of his cock hitting every part inside of you.

“s-satoru! g-gonna’ cum!” you gasp out loud, the feeling of your orgasm pooling inside of you.

“shit— me too, baby. c-cum with me, take all my load!” he grunts loudly as his thrusts stammer as he releases a hot load of cum inside of you, painting your walls with ropes of cum. you moan out at the feeling of his cum filling you as you milk his cock, pussy spasming as you reach the end of your high.

you both pant loudly as you both hit your orgasm together. he pulls out of you quickly, as cum spills out of your pretty pussy. he smiles at the sight. even though you were his sweet little housewife, he loved to ruin you.

he picked you up and sat you down on the couch before giving you a blanket, some water, and a plate of pancakes.

“thank you, satoru!” you smiled sweetly at his affection and aftercare towards you. he kept his promise and sat down to eat breakfast with you. he was such a great husband!

as he sat down next to you, he chuckled loud as he opened his phone.

“what’s so funny, baby?” you ask, crawling over to him wanting to laugh with him as well.

“aren’t you just the most adorable girl in the world?” he answered cooing at you. he started laughing loud and cocky again at his wallpaper, staring at it with another famous shit eating grin as he admired his artwork.

it was..

a photo of you..

with the words.. ‘torus cockslut on your breasts..

written with love by the one and only, Gojo Satoru.

your cheeks warmed up at the sight.

“w-wha—!” you gasp before covering your face in embarrassment. it wasn’t a wholesome moment at all!

he giggles once more before wrapping an arm around you, pulling you close to his bare chest.

“a bit disappointed i forgot to put my signature, but there is always a next time, yeah?”

a/n: in gojo we trust! hope u enjoyed <3

[angelwings-crossbowstrings]

Blood Ties Chapter 2

Series Masterlist

Chapter Warnings: Typical TWD violence and gore

Moodboard by @dannyo000 💙

You were doing up the buttons on your flannel when you heard Daryl grumbling behind you. 

“I hate rubbers.”

You chuckled, putting your hands on the nape of your neck and pushing outward to coax your hair out of the shirt. The man had done as you asked all those weeks ago, returning to the next meetup with condoms in hand. You had left it up to him to dispose of them afterward, earning an amusing curl of his lip. 

“So,” you began, plopping down on the ground, “guess what.”

Daryl zipped up his own pack and shrugged it over his shoulders, raising a brow at you with his usual expression of indifference. “We gonna start cuddlin’ after too?”

“Shut up. It’s not just every day conversation, asshole. I’m late.”

“Ya got a curfew now?” He scoffed, snatching his crossbow up off the ground to slide the strap over his right shoulder. 

“No, idiot. I mean, my period is late.”

“How ya even keep up with that now?” He was still standing, fingers of his left hand tapping nervously against his hip while he chewed on the skin of his right thumb. Uncomfortable again. 

“I always kept a little date book in my bag before things went to shit. Just started marking off days when we came up here. Hoping this would all end and life could go back to—well, being life.” You picked up a twig and started breaking small sections off, not really wanting to look at him. “I’m 6 days late, which is pretty odd for me.”

“I don’t need the details. D’ya need a test or somethin’?”

“I will if it doesn’t come soon, yeah.” You tossed the stick down and got to your feet, dusting off your hands on your thighs. “Probably should do it next week if it’s still not happening.”

The man was a ball of anxiety, fidgeting and shifting his weight from foot to foot. You watched him warily, waiting for him to bolt and that would be that. If you were pregnant, you’d be in it alone.

“I’ll make a run an’ see if I can find one.” He finally said after a few minutes of unnerving silence, shouldering his string of squirrels. You blinked at him, eyes as big as saucers. “What? Said we’d deal with it an’ I meant it.”

“I’ll go with you then.” 

“Nah, I got it. Just bring it next week.” He sniffed, looking down at his boots as he kicked at the ground. “Ain’t no reason for ya to go out in that mess.”

“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’re being protective.”

He scoffed, scrunching his nose in a way you could almost say was adorable. “Just don’t need ya trippin’ me up.”

Pursing your lips, you crossed your arms over your chest, deciding whether or not to argue with him. It was something that involved the both of you. You’d feel horrible if something happened to him while he was trying to take care of it alone. And you’d never know. He’d just never show up again, leaving you to wonder if he had simply bailed or—

“I’m going too.”

“No, ya ain’t.” He snapped while you picked up your rifle and the three rabbits you’d bagged. You started walking, leaving him trailing behind you with his stomping feet and flared nostrils. “Ya ain’t goin’!”

“You gonna stop me?” You asked, not missing a step. You heard him pause before his boots moved faster to catch back up with you. “I’m a big girl, Dixon. I can handle myself.” 

“Fine. Whatever.”

You only encountered two geeks at the base of the mountain. Daryl took out one with a bolt between the eyes while you handled the other with your hunting knife. His scowl was thoroughly in place by the time you were cleaning the dark blood from the blade with the bottom of your shirt. He didn’t say a word but he didn’t have to. You knew it was because you had to get close to the corpse to kill it. You couldn’t risk firing your gun when so many others could close by. 

The two of you were crouched in the bushes, the pharmacy across the street in the little town in clear view. Three geeks shuffled aimlessly in different directions, making it difficult to find a way straight through. 

“Maybe one of us could distract them?” You suggested. “I could go out over there, make some noise and draw them off while you go inside.” You looked over to find him staring at you like you’d sprouted a second head. “What?”

“You’re the one that knows whatcha need in there. I’ll handle the geeks.”

You really couldn’t argue with that. There were so many different tests for pregnancy, ovulation, and other things, Daryl would probably bring out the entire shelf and still not have what you needed. With a nod, you watched him make his way down the ditch, staying low. His eyes met yours briefly and, with a jerky nod, he left the cover of the foliage and whistled, waving his arms. 

You waited for an opening, nearly leaping out before two more corpses stumbled from the alley next to the pharmacy. “Fuck.” Daryl was going to be sorely outnumbered. Something in your gut twisted, the strong urge to stay and help the redneck, ensure he was safe, before you entered the pharmacy. He’d have your head if you dared. With another curse, you left your hiding place and dashed across the street, your steps that of a hunter—swift and silent. 

The pharmacy was blessedly clear, a few geeks sprawled out between aisles, clean holes in their skulls. Daryl had been there before. “So, this is where you got the condoms. You reckless son of a bitch.” You smirked, the knowledge that fucking you was enough fun to have him scurrying down the mountain for the means to continue. 

You grabbed two of each kind of test, deeming labels and specifications unnecessary when Daryl was outside fighting the undead to keep them off your back. The boxes were quickly shoved into your bag, and you were creeping back toward the door. Just as your hand touched the glass, a geek stumbled by. You quickly ducked and moved to the side, peeking around the magazine stand to ensure it had passed before you pushed the door open. 

There were at least 7 of them on the far end of the street, walking toward nothing you could see. Where was Daryl? You barely lifted a foot to step off the curb when an arm snaked around your waist and a hand clamped down over your mouth. 

“S’me. S’just me.” Daryl whispered against your ear. Wrapping your fingers around his wrist, you forced his hand away from your face and spun around to give him a shove. 

“You scared the shit out of me!” You whisper-yelled. 

“Got whatcha need?” He was already ushering you toward the trees across the street. You gave a sharp nod and ducked into the bushes, finally releasing a breath when you could look back and no longer see any trace of the town. 

“Well, that was fun.” 

Daryl snorted beside you, adjusting the strap of his crossbow on his shoulder. Once your heart rate slowed, you were able to settle back into your appreciation for the forest. So far, the turn had been unable to strip that away from you. The wildlife continued to flourish, seeing no difference between the dead and the living. Plants would grow. Flowers would bloom. Seasons would change. 

In some ways, life would go on. 

“Y/N.”

“Yeah?” You turned to find Daryl facing away from you. With a quick look around, you realized how long the two of you had really been walking. It was time to part ways. “Oh. Right. Heading back now?” 

“Nah. Gonna see if I can bag a deer. So, ‘nother day or two.” He was gnawing at his thumb again. 

“Right. Well. Three days, midday?” He nodded his agreement, those blue eyes of his flitting to your pack and back to you. You smiled through a strange feeling, pushing it down as he started to walk away. “See you then.”

“See ya.”

“Hey, daddy.” You smiled, finding your father sitting by the small fire when you parted the last bit of foliage to enter the camp. 

“Peanut, you’re back late. I was gettin’ worried!” He shifted in his wheelchair to sit straighter, smile wide and arms open. You leaned in for his offered hug, holding up the rabbits when you separated. 

“Got some meat for tomorrow.” You smiled for only a moment before looking around for the rest of your family. “Did they seriously leave you out here alone?”

“I’m fine, darlin’. Told ‘em to go on to bed and that I’d rather wait up for you.”

You gave him a pointed look, laying the rabbits aside to prep later. “Well, I’m here now. You should get some sleep.” 

“It’s early yet. Tell me how it was out there.”

You sat down in one of the fold-out chairs, toeing at the rocks surrounding the small fire. “It’s quiet. It’s always quiet.”

“You see any of ‘em?” He asked, a hint of concern in his tone. You shook your head. “I worry about you going out all alone.”

“I can handle myself, daddy.”

“I know you can, peanut. I just—wish you didn’t have to. It’s a parent’s job to worry about their kids, you know.” He smiled and you couldn’t help but smile back. 

“You’re gonna give yourself gray hair with all the worrying. Oh shit, I think I see some from all the way over here!” You laughed with him for a while longer before the fire burned out and the camp was dark. 

You bolted upright in your sleeping bag, still groggy and not really remembering why it was you were awake in the first place. Rubbing your eyes, you sat there for a moment before deeming it time to get the day started. The sun was barely up but your uncles were already stirring if the sounds outside the tent were anything to go by. Your aunt had taken watch several hours earlier so she’d probably be sleeping now. 

Scratching at your scalp with a yawn, you glanced over at your open pack, the top corner of a box peeking out from beneath your jacket. You sighed, knowing you would need to take the test. You still hadn’t bled and you’d be meeting Daryl the next day. You groaned and grabbed your clothes, slipping on everything haphazardly while your uncles banged and clanged on everything they possibly could outside. Shrugging on your jacket, you unzipped the tent. 

“Jesus, some of us are still half asleep! Uncle James, could you put on some coffee for daddy before—”

Just as you began to crawl from your tent, a geek came barging in, teeth clicking and rotting fingers grabbing. You screamed and scrambled backwards, kicking at the corpse while your hand searched blindly for your knife. Another clumsily shoved its way inside, pinning one of your legs and leaving you just far enough from your weapon that your fingertips brushed the handle. 

Somewhere outside, your father was screaming. 

Chapter 3

[slasherbvnnie]

Until We Found You | Part V

Part V is finally out!! I enjoyed writing this one a lot! I still have some more chapters in mind, especially for the big reveal. Not sure how many I can write out, but I don’t see it happening anytime soon.  Sorry it’s a bit short this time! The next part is going to be longer. As usual, heed the tags

Modern Day College Scream AU, Obsessed AFAB!Reader, Eventual Poly!Ghostface x reader, Eventual NSFW, All characters 18+

Part I Part II Part III Part IV Part VI Part VII Part VIII Part IX

word count: 1836

“Don’t you know the trope of never having sex in horror films?” The other line asked you, making you laugh, “you didn’t kill me the first time, why would it be any different now?” You asked as you sat out on your front porch, taking a seat on the bench outside. “What if someone else made you star in their movie, huh? Wouldn’t you be part of their film instead,” they said as you laughed, “yeah, but then it could be some big cross over. Like alien versus predator or king kong and Godzilla, I would kinda like to see that, my two boys fighting for protecting me.” You teased as they chuckled. 

“I heard you wanted both of us there tonight,” they hummed, making you smile, “so you’re the one who makes the calls?” you asked before continuing, “I want you both here…alongside a new lingerie outfit too, you boys are really racking up a total. You two should take me shopping sometime.” You suggested playfully, wishing that you could go out in public with the two. “Maybe someday,” they said, sounding a little more somber now. “Will you two ever let me know who you are?” You asked, it had been on your mind lately, but the silence gave you your answer. “I guess you still can’t trust me, huh? It’s fine, I’ll find a way to prove it to you two.” You said, hearing another phone call coming in. “I have to let you go now, one of my friends is calling, I’ll see you two tonight, right?” You questioned, “we’ll be a little later tonight but don’t worry, we’ll be there.” They promised you before hanging up. Y

ou smiled, answering the new call coming in. “Hey! Me and Stu were gonna head out for lunch soon, did you wanna join? Sid’s gonna call Billy to see if he wanted to go,” Tatum’s voice said, you debated for a moment before agreeing. “Great! Me and Stu will pick you up, we can pick up Randy too afterwards,” she said as you hummed. “Sounds good, I’ll get ready now,” You said, hanging up after saying goodbye. Your eyes lingered out into the street, you couldn’t help but feel as if there was someone watching you, wondering if your secret stalker was watching over you right now. Part of you wished they’d just come out and reveal themselves to you, pull off their mask and show you their faces. You let out a sigh, getting up from the bench and heading back inside the house to get ready.By the time Stu’s car pulled up to your driveway you were ready, hair and outfit finished along with just the right amount of makeup for you. 

You could hear the music playing from outside, wondering at which point in time Stu would finally lose his hearing, you gave him another 10 good years. You texted your parents that you were going out with your group again, promising them to be home before curfew. Curfew had bummed you out recently, you made a mental note to tell your masked killers that you were mad at them for making Woodsboro go under a curfew, everything sucked now that nothing was open past 6. “Hey Macher, calm it with the stereo,” you said as Stu chuckled, “can’t help it, I like making my presence known,” he said as he turned up the music louder. You rolled your eyes, chatting with Tatum as you all headed to pick up the others. 

Sid and Billy met you at the restaurant, already sitting down at a booth when you all arrived. It was about an hour later, everyone finished with their food and just spending time chatting about whatever came up. “Did you guys hear about Oliver?” Randy asked as Tatum nodded, “Dewey said it was even worse than Casey and Steve, said you couldn’t recognize him at all,” she added in as your eyebrows furrowed. “Sid said the neighbors tried getting the killer, did Dewey say anything about that?” You questioned as Tatum shook her head, “no, he said the neighbor tried to shoot at them but they missed. Said they took off into the woods,” she said, you growing worried if they had been hurt. They didn’t mention anything on the phone so you assumed they weren’t, making you relax a bit. “Maybe it was your mystery date,” Randy teased, making you glare at him, “I mean we were talking about him yesterday, maybe your boyfriend got mad about him and decided to off him as some romantic present,” he added as you laughed. “Right, cause I totally want to be an accomplice,” you joked as you rolled your eyes, but you did wonder if that was true.

 Oliver had bullied others as well, so you didn’t put it past them to have also been one of his victims. Though, the thought that they did it for you made your heart beat faster. “I think you cracked the code Meeks,” Billy teased, noticing your reddening cheeks, “are you all forgetting she was almost killed by them?” Sidney brought up as Stu hummed, “well she is still alive, maybe Randy was right with them doing it to cover up their tracks,” he said as you scoffed. “Can you jackasses back off before I take my turn at you?” You said jokingly, waving the butterknife on your plate around playfully. 

Later that night you sat in bed, rewatching the Texas Chainsaw Massacre on your laptop with Irena purring and fast asleep on your lap. You snacked on some popcorn as you watched the movie, looking to your side as you saw Tatum calling you. You hit pause on the movie and answered as you ate another piece of popcorn, “whats up, Tate?” You asked as she quickly spoke, “holy shit! They almost got the killer!” she yelled into the phone, making you sit up. “What?” You questioned as she laughed. “The killer! They were going after some of Oliver’s friends. They were having a celebration for him and one of the guys actually fucking stabbed them! Dewey said they were chasing them down but lost them a few moments ago, they said the police are gonna be waiting at the hospital incase anyone comes in with a stab wound,” she said, you carefully moved Irena off your lap and set your laptop on your vanity as you looked out your window. You could see the black outfit moving and struggling to climb up, “shit, that’s awesome Tate, let me know if Dewey calls you again, I’m gonna go tell my parents,” You spoke, hanging up the phone and putting it down as you pushed your window open. 

“Seriously? Going after the whole fucking football team?” You asked angrily, putting your hand out to help them inside. You shut the window after they got in, seeing them collapse onto the floor. “Shit, hold on,” You said as you rushed to your bathroom, grabbing the first aid kit and rushing back to their side. You were about to lift up the robe before they grabbed your wrist, pushing your hand away. You felt a little hurt that they still didn’t trust you, but pointed in the direction of the restroom. “You can patch yourself up in there, my friend said the police are going to be at the hospital, you can’t go,” you said, seeing the flashing of police lights pass by outside. “Is the other one okay?” You questioned them, getting a nod as they hubbled to the bathroom. After half an hour they emerged from the bathroom, taking a seat on your desk chair. “Are you okay? Did the bleeding stop?” You fretted over them, getting a nod as they motioned you over. They grabbed your wrist, holding your hand up to their chest so you could feel their steady heartbeat. You relaxed before pushing on their chest, huffing at them. “The whole fucking football team, you’re actually fucking crazy,” you huffed out before gently rubbing where you had pushed them. “The other one, he got away okay?” You asked, smiling when you got another nod. “You can stay as long as you need tonight, the police are probably out searching for you,” you said, sighing softly as you looked to them. “Don’t think I forgot about that lingerie set either, it was pretty expensive,” you said jokingly, earning a laugh from behind their mask. “I’m gonna head to bed, I have an exam tomorrow,” you said, giving a little kiss to their mask. “If you wanna join at least take off your clothes, I won’t look, I promise. You can even blindfold me if you don’t trust me,” you offered, heading to bed. They followed after you, you laid down and closed your eyes, facing them so they could see that you weren’t looking. They began to shuffle out of the costume, going to your door and locking it before heading back to your bed. They laid down behind you, wrapping their arms around you and holding you close.

You fell asleep easily in their hold, relaxing in their arms throughout the night. A few hours later you woke up to muffled voices in the bathroom, you sat up and rubbed your eyes as you looked to see the morning sunlight lighting up your room. “I’m fine, just spent the night at her place,” you heard coming from the bathroom, your groggy mind a bit too slow to recognize they weren’t using the voice changer. You did your best to not pay attention, not wanting to betray their trust by finding out who they were too soon. You laid down again, closing your eyes when you heard the door open. You felt their hand tracing your face before they planted little kisses on your cheeks before planting a soft and loving one to your lips. They pulled away and pulled the mask on before tapping you, you pretended to stir awake, blinking up at them. “You’re leaving?” You asked as they nodded, “be safe, okay? I would rather prefer finding out who you are when you trust me and not through some Gale Weathers interview,” you said as you leaned up, planting a little kiss on their mask just like last night. “Be safe, both of you,” you said as they nodded and began to climb out your window. 

An hour later Tatum came to pick you up in her little red beetle, driving both of you to class. You met up with Sid and Stu, who had his arm wrapped around Tatum. “Where’s Billy at today?” Tatum asked as Sid sighed, “said he came down with a major stomach bug. He said he was sick all night and didn’t even sleep, his dad told him to head to the doctor instead of class,” she said as you turned towards Sidney. Stu became aware of your glance at her, his eyes widening in surprise when you made eye contact with him. 

[lw77]

Diet Pepsi 💈 (LSxMV)

Chapter 6. - Special Friend

Logan gets a ride home from Max and finds out there's a ghost haunting his house.

Before long, the kitchen fills with more people. Logan nurses the espresso Max made for him as he watches everyone blearily make their way in. When the crowd starts gathering around the island, he feels his stool being pulled and sees Max give him a lazy smile over his espresso cup, drawing him closer to where he stands. Once he’s pressed into Max’s side, Logan tilts his head in question.

“Do you need a ride home, Angel?” Max asks, leaning down slightly.

“No, I think I���m going with Alex and Os—” He turns to point where he last saw them leaning into each other, only to realize they’re no longer there. “Wait, where'd they go? Max, oh my god, they were just here a second ago!” He turns his head around to see if those two somehow ended up behind him, but they have really disappeared.

Max chuckles. “I guess I’m driving you home, Angel. Want to grab your stuff while I try to find Danny to say goodbye?”

Logan grimaces when he realizes his bag is still with Oscar. “Uh, sure, but my bag’s with Oscar.” Dropping his voice to a whisper, he tugs Max down. “You don’t think they’re all in the room, do you? Oh my god, what if that’s why they disappeared—those horn dogs.” Both he and Max scan the kitchen for Carlos and George, only to discover they have also vanished.

They both spot a grinning Fernando, who beams when he sees they realize who exactly is missing in action. “I can’t lie, Angel. I didn’t think they would go for a repeat so soon.”

Logan pats Max’s chest. “Me too, but why do I feel like Fernando definitely knew they would?”

Max holds the hands that were patting his chest and uses them to pull Logan off the stool. “I don’t know, Angel, but it’s his thing.”

Logan thinks back to the night before when Fernando orchestrated the whole room allocation. “Yeah, his thing,” he repeats sceptically as he follows Max out of the kitchen.

When they reach the hallway leading to the rooms, Logan isn’t sure if he wants to walk in on whatever scene those four are making—or not making. “You know, I think I’ll just shoot Oscar a text to bring my bag whenever he leaves,” he tells Max.

Max laughs at his trepidation. “Okay, Angel. Let’s go get whatever we need from our room. We can go find Danny afterward if he’s awake, and then I’ll take you home.”

As Max packs up his swim shorts and other items, Danny walks into their room.

“Good morning, lovebirds!” he exclaims before unceremoniously falling face-first into the bed. A few moments later, he adds, “Oh god, it smells like eau de cum in here. Jesus, did you guys just have sex or something? On these sheets that I just buried my head in?!”

“Technically, we didn’t,” Logan says.

“Didn’t have sex on the sheets? Don’t lie to me; it smells funky.” Danny snaps back.

“Well, we didn’t have sex, right, Maxie?” Logan continues happily. For some reason, teasing Danny is as enjoyable as telling his annoying cousin that Santa Claus isn't real.

“Yes, Angel.”

“See? It must be your own breath or something, Danny.” Logan says innocently, making Danny jump up as he breathes into his palm to test it.

“Whatever, I know you guys did something. It’s not only my Nonna who has a sixth sense for these things; I do too, Logieboy, so I’ll let it slide.” Danny attempts to sound menacing but looks a little worse for wear after the brief gaslighting session Logan led.

“Alright, we’re gonna head out. If you need anything, give me a call, Danny,” Max says, clapping Danny on the back before pulling him into a brief hug.

“Oh, don’t you worry, Maxie pad! Just take our little Logiebear home safe and sound. And make sure you don’t throw your back out, because we need all hands on deck for the job on Monday!” Danny finishes with a 100-watt grin.

Rolling his eyes at his best friend’s antics, Max shakes his head and waves as they head to the front door together. Logan, on the other hand, scowls at Danny before scrunching his face in faux disgust and fanning the air in front of him for added effect, as if Danny’s breath really does smell. When Danny catches on, he quickly tests his breath again.

“Goodbye, Danny! Don’t choke on your toothbrush!” Logan calls out with a laugh as he skips out the door, leaving Danny still testing his breath.

Shaking his head, Max opens the passenger door for Logan. “Hop in, Angel,” he says in that familiar, easy tone.

Logan gives a small smile before sliding in. The click of his seatbelt fills the brief silence as Max walks around to the driver’s side, settling in and starting the truck. They pull out of the driveway, the morning quiet around them.

“You’ll need to give me directions, Angel,” Max says, his voice calm. “Unless you want me to take you to your dad’s store—or mine,” he adds with a teasing grin, his eyes flicking briefly over to Logan.

Logan turns, catching that playful glint in Max’s eyes. “You want me in your bed again so soon, Maxie?” he teases back.

Max chuckles, his hand brushing through Logan’s hair before trailing down to rest on his thigh, his touch firm yet soft. “Well, when you ask so nicely,” Max replies, his voice low and warm, eyes on the road but a smile playing on his lips.

Rolling his eyes, Logan places his hand over Max's before he directs him to his house. The cab of the truck fills with a languid peace as they navigate through the morning traffic, lulling Logan into a brief nap.

The truck shutting off jolts him awake, and he blinks, realizing they’ve arrived outside his house. He looks back at Max, a small pout on his lips when he realizes he slept through most of the drive.

“What’s wrong, Angel? Is this not the right address?” Max questions, his tone playful.

Shaking his head, Logan replies, “It is. Guess I’ll see you on Monday?” His voice carries a hint of disappointment at having to part.

Chuckling, Max’s hand comes to cradle the side of Logan’s face, his thumb brushing where Logan’s lip juts out. “We can go to mine, Angel. We don’t have to do anything either. Just sit and look pretty for me while I work on some of our projects. You like that?”

Logan leans his head into Max’s hand, feeling comforted its not just him disappointed at their goodbye. “As much as I’d love to, I think I need to go give a sign of life to my parents so they know I didn’t drown. But… I’d love to do that another time?” He raises his eyes to Max’s shyly.

Brushing his thumb along Logan’s cheekbone, Max smiles softly. “Of course, Angel.” He leans in, pressing a gentle kiss to the spot where his thumb rested. 

When Max pulls back, Logan instinctively shifts forward, his lips catching Max’s in a brief, sweet kiss. Leaning closer over the cab of the truck, he brings his hands to clutch the back of Max’s neck, fingers tangling in his hair, trying to pull him in closer. The warmth radiating from their bodies fills the space between them, heating up the cab, it makes Logan's pulse quicken.

Max kisses Logan back, the sweetness quickly transforming into something deeper, more urgent. Their lips moving together, soft and hungry, as both try to pull the other closer. Max’s hands slide down Logan’s sides, fingers grazing over his jeans, teasingly tugging at the loops as if to pull him into his lap.

The pressure of the tug makes Logan gasp, his breath hitching in his throat, a sweet, intoxicating sound that Max eagerly swallows down. He breaks away just enough to catch Logan’s gaze—those eyes now dark with desire and edged with frustration—as a wayward smile dances on his lips.

"Why'd you stop?" Logan whines, his disappointment palpable as he paws at Max, hands desperate, trying to pull him back in, the need for more clear in every touch.

“Can’t take care of you here, Angel. I don’t want to send you home to your parents like that, now do we?” Max placates, despite his teasing words.

Groaning, Logan replies, “Ugh, I change my mind. Let’s go to yours, Maxie. I’ll send my parents a text.” 

Max laughs softly. “Angel, I think it’s too late for that. We’ve been out here long enough that I’m pretty sure your parents are looking through the windows at us—yeah, there it is.” 

Logan looks outside to see the living room curtain suddenly close shut. 

“Oh my god,” he exclaims, mortified.

Still chuckling, Max says, “It’s kind of funny.”

“It’s mortifying,” Logan shoots back. With one last peck to Max’s lips, he twists to open his door. 

“I’ll see you soon, alright, Angel?” Max’s voice is gentle yet firm.

Logan nods, his heart fluttering as he steps out into the cool morning air. “Yeah, soon,” he echoes, taking a moment to glance back at Max, who watches him with a smile that sends warmth flooding through him.

When the front door shuts, Logan hears Max’s engine turn on, followed by the familiar sounds of him driving off.

Soon, he hears his mom call out unconvincingly, “Logan, is that you, hun?” as she rounds the foyer.

“Yeah, Mom! Didn’t you see when you and Dad were peeking out the window?” Logan calls out, easily calling their bluff.

He hears his dad yell from the kitchen, “The living room is just drafty, son! That has nothing to do with us!”

Nodding at her husband’s words, Logan’s mom agrees, brushing her arms in a ‘so cold’ gesture. “Your father’s right, hun. That was definitely not us. It might even be a ghost, you know? Grammie did like those curtains quite a lot, probably her spirit” she adds, continuing her unconvincing act. “Now come on, I made some pancakes.” Her tone brooks no argument, silencing any further protests Logan might have had about their excuses.

Following his mom into the kitchen, Logan sees his dad wearing a knowing smile. “So, how was the lake house? Did you boys have fun?”

“Yeah, it was good. Danny had jet skis, so Oscar and Alex were on those all day,” Logan replies, trying to keep it casual.

“And any special friends made there?” His dad quickly follows up, eyebrows waggling playfully.

“Yeah, honey, did you make any special friends?” his mom echoes, a teasing lilt in her voice.

“Okay, you guys keep emphasizing ‘special’ like I make imaginary friends or something. It’s getting weird. Is there a question ‘Grammie’ might have since she moved the curtains so much?” Logan asks, giving his parents a knowing look.

Clapping her hands in delight, his mom is quick to respond, “Oh yes! She said it’s a shame that kind young man who drove you home didn’t come in for her famous pancake recipe.”

“Seriously?” Logan raises an eyebrow, incredulous.

“Logan, this isn’t your mother and I, but Grammie. We are merely her messengers. So please don’t skip any details,” his dad explains, suppressing a grin and failing to keep a straight face.

Logan sighs, feeling the weight of his parents’ curiosity pressing down on him. He doesn’t know if he should be embarrassed or annoyed.

“His name is Max. We spent time together, and he offered me a ride home,” Logan mutters.

His dad springs up. “Max? Our regular Max? The one who called you ‘Angel’ last time?”

His mom gasps dramatically. “Someone flirted with our son, called him ‘Angel,’ and you’re just telling me this now?”

Logan groans, “Can we drop it, please? You wanted some details, and I gave them.”

“Sweetheart, I was going to tell you! He’s the one from Ricc&Co we thought we had to hire to finally get him into Logan’s bedroom. You should’ve seen him in the store—he only had eyes for Logan,” his dad interjects.

“Whatever,” Logan retorts, trying to hide the smile creeping onto his face. “Can I just eat my pancakes in peace?”

“Only if you tell us more about this Max! Your dad saw you flirt; I only saw—” his mom insists, a mischievous glint in her eye before it widens as she realizes something.

“You mean Grammie saw? Anyway, you’ll see him, Mom, just come to the store and watch like Dad does” he concedes, finally cracking a smile as he digs into the stack of pancakes.

Authors Note: I didn't forget this story! I know this is short but the next chapter will be loooooong <3

[hyunfilms]

blue side of the sky (lmh) | five.

♡ spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: waking up after 3 months with no recollection of your past, your friends do what they can to help you remember. except, they omit an important piece to the puzzle - afraid you would remember the heartbreak and hurt all over again.

—pairing: lee know x f. reader

—genre: (18+) exes to lovers, bestfriends to lovers au | fluff, angst, (eventual) smut

—word count: 5.3k

—chapter warning: cussing, jisung being his worried and overprotective self, small argument between minho & jisung, another deep look into minho's feelings about everything, minho dance session which should be a warning itself, smut but not super descriptive smut (implied oral - m. receiving, doggy style), also a look into minho and kat, flashback scene at the end highlighting a core, painful moment for minho, crying, oc is in a coma during flashback

"Hi." You answer the phone call coming in as you make your way to your first pottery class.

"Cielo! Are you at class now?" You chuckle.

"About to be."

"You didn't answer my text." You can hear the pout through Jisung's tone.

"Sorry, pachi. I was gonna get to it as soon as I got inside the store. What's up?"

"I asked if you found anything to wear yet. For Yuna's?"

"Oh, no."

"Wanna go look after class? I'll meet you."

"I'm, um—" You pause a bit as you enter the store and greet the boy re-stocking items at the front.

"You're.. what?"

"I'm actually hanging out with San afterwards. He said he'd go with me to check out some dresses."

"You're.. hanging out with San?"

"Yes?" You let out a small sigh due to the unexpected response from your bestfriend. You felt nervous, and even more scared. Maybe you shouldn't have agreed to hang out with San. "Pachi, you told me to go for it. Should I just cancel and go with you—"

"No, no. I know I said that. I'm sorry, cielo. I didn't mean it in a bad way. I'm glad you're hanging out with him and stuff! Seriously. I just didn't expect that day to be today."

"I don't exactly have much time to find a dress."

"Yeah, I know. You'll find something and you'll look great in it, though! Is he gonna meet you after class?"

"Mhm."

"Okay, good. Well, enjoy yourself, okay? Don't think too much and just go with the flow."

"I know, I know."

"Well wait, let me back track." Jisung lets out a sigh. "I'm sorry. Are you ready to hang out with him? I hope I didn't pressure you too much."

"No it's not that. I think I'm ready. I mean, it's casual and super harmless, right?"

"Of course. He seems cool. But if he does try anything that you aren't ready for, just call me."

"I'll be fine. Thanks, Ji."

"Alright. Send pics of what you find!"

"I will." Your bottom lip pokes out as you end the call and tuck your phone back into your bag. This morning, you felt your confidence growing. You had been confident enough to agree to a hang out with San, even though he reassured you that there was no pressure. But the call with Jisung had you second-guessing everything.

Were you really ready for this?

You know Jisung meant no harm behind anything he said, but it was hard for you to not overthink. The only thing getting you by is the reminder that you have to experience these things to continue learning and settling back into the world; to continue living.

You couldn't be stuck in one place forever.

"Are you okay, miss?" You look over to your right and see the same boy from the front stocking up some of the shelves near the pottery classroom. You hadn't realized you zoned out and stopped in your tracks before entering the room.

"Oh. Yeah, I am." You chuckle shyly. "Sorry. Was lost in thought."

"No worries, just wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Thank you." You give him a small smile before finally entering the classroom. It's only supposed to be for 6 people, and you only see one other person already sitting at a wheel. You take the seat opposite from her, giving her a small smile when she glances up to look at you. She returns the smile, but her attention shifts back to her phone.

It doesn't take long before the rest of the wheels are filled and class is starting. You feel incredibly shy, but everyone in your class seems to be down to earth and just as eager to get their hands dirty. At first, you feel shy. You're barely working on the clay as much as the others are, but you remind yourself that you work at your own pace. When it's time to throw, it's a bit of a struggle before you finally find your own rhythm; receiving small praises from your instructor as she comes to your aid every now and then.

You're making a basic pot. Something to start off with, something easy.

It's fun.

You're happy you decided to move forward with class, paying some money for a membership to use the classroom during open hours. Class takes an hour and a half today, but the classroom remains open for anyone who is interested in doing another piece before the kiln gets loaded in a class or two. You wish you could, but as soon as you let your pot sit on the rack to completely dry, you catch wind of San walking around nearby aisles. He sees you looking over and he waves, a huge smile plastered on his face while you continue to clean up your space. When you've finally gotten through the last items and tidied up, you quickly wash your hands and grab your things to meet San in the store.

"Hey!" He waves enthusiastically. "How was class?" He digs his hands into his pocket while he waits for your response.

"It was good! Fun to get back into it." San nods.

"I'm glad. It's always satisfying to get back into things you've enjoyed." He nods towards the entrance. "It's beautiful outside. Ready to shop for dresses? You can tell me more about class while we walk."

"Sure." You chuckle. "What have you been up to today?"

"Well, I started off my day super early. Went to the gym before work. Got lots of things done. Now I'm here." He gives you a small smile. Over the course of texting San, you find out a few key details about him:

One, he has a younger sister and a cat that he adores. He's very family-oriented and takes everything family-related very seriously. He met JJ and their friend group in college, and they've stayed close ever since then. He also adores his friends to bits; it's quite cute. He says their personalities are all different, but they mesh so well.

Two, he was the definition of someone who took every single opportunity [especially in college] and ran with it. He aced his classes, participated in campus-wide activities and student government, volunteered, took internship after internship— that being what lead him to a huge opportunity overseas right after graduation to learn side by side from a principal architect. Years of doing so led him to a full-time position with their office back here at home.

Three, he is handsome, and he is incredibly sweet. He's laid back and caring; it's very easy to see why he gets along with people.

It's easy to talk to him.

So easy, that time flies by when you're with him. After a long, ongoing conversation about how the days have been, you've already popped into a few shops; slowly pulling hangers apart from each other to get a better view of the dresses— no particular dress catching your eyes just yet.

You eventually do find two dresses in the back of a new store you popped into that look fantastic on the mannequin, however, you feel like it'll be a different story when you try it on. Jisung says the wedding is at a hotel near the oceanside two hours away. The colors are hues of sage, green, browns and pale golds, and you're already excited to see how everything will turn out.

One dress is a taupe satin dress with a high slit, spaghetti straps and a cowl neck-line. The other is a sage satin dress with an asymmetrical high slit. They're almost similar in style— you're just not sure which color [or fit] would look better on you. San can tell you're unsure as you look at both dresses side by side, hands trailing down the fabric.

"Those are really pretty. You should try them on. You'll look great in either of those." San smiles.

"They're not too.. simple?" San shrugs.

"No. I think they're perfect for the wedding." You give him a small smile and nod, walking off to dressing room. San finds a little cushion to sit and wait on, scrolling through his phone while he patiently waits for you to be ready. He's not expecting you to show him the dresses, and quite frankly, he hopes he didn't come off that way. He does believe you'll look good in whatever option you choose, and his opinion doesn't matter much at the end of the day— it's truly whatever you feel good and comfortable in. Of course, San thinks you're gorgeous. He really couldn't help himself that day he walked into the café and saw you. Of course, his end goal would be to take you on a date and see where thing goes. But, the thing about San is that he knows about your accident. He knows the overall gist of things that have happened, but he doesn't know the fine details like your friends or JJ might know. It's not his business anyway, and he'd rather not go back to that moment in your life. So, he doesn't ask. He'll let you open up to him about it once [and if] you're ready. But, he knows. And he knows this isn't a priority for you right now, which is completely understandable.

If things happen, things happen. If it takes time, it takes time. Until then, he will continue to get to know you and be a friend.

"San?" San is pulled out of his thoughts when he hears you softly call his name behind the dressing room door.

"Yeah? You okay?"

"Yeah, I just.. is it okay if I show you the first dress?"

"Of course, whatever you're comfortable with, Y/N."

"I just need you to see them and give me your honest opinion, okay?"

"Always." He hears the door handle jiggle before you swing the door open. You've tried on the taupe dress and you shyly come forward, hands fidgeting with the fabric of the dress. San sits up a bit as his eyes light up, nodding in acknowledgement with a small smile. "That color looks great on you."

"Is the dress okay? It feels a little too much." You fiddle with your fingers. "I feel like I can't comfortably move with how high this slit goes."

"The angle too, hm?" He nods. "It looks great, but if you're not comfortable, then maybe the next dress will feel better?" You nod.

"Yeah, maybe."

"It's fine Y/N, don't force yourself if you aren't 100% on it." You give him a small smile before walking back into the dressing room to try on the other dress. You also aren't expecting much with this dress, but as soon as you slip it on, you smile at yourself in the mirror and take it in for a moment.

It feels perfect.

The slit is also pretty high, but it's not asymmetrical and at a weird angle so you can still move around comfortably. It fits nicely on your body, your figure, and the fabric isn't too heavy. Taupe color is beautiful under the light, and it's easy to pair.

"I really like this one." You say softly and San lets out a small chuckle.

"That's good. I'm glad you do." He watches as you walk out and nods in agreement when he sees how much more relaxed you look in the dress. "You look beautiful. That dress is the one!" You shyly chuckle at him.

"Yeah, I think it is, too."

"Are you set on it, or do you still wanna look some more?"

"No, I'm pretty set on this." San stands with a smile.

"Nice, it's perfect. We can go eat somewhere after, if you'd like?"

"Oh yes, please. I'm starving. I'm sorry I dragged you along on this." You say as you shut the door and start to get changed.

"No, don't apologize. I meant it when I said I didn't mind. I'm happy to accompany you." San scratches at his temple and nervously laughs. "I honestly thought we'd take much longer, so I'm a little relieved we can eat now." You laugh and gather your things, handing the other dress to the staff member before walking to the cashier.

Afterwards, San takes you to a bbq spot out of the central downtown area, roughly a 15 minute drive out. You get seated pretty quickly even though the restaurant is becoming packed by the minute. It's not too loud, but it is bustling; with busy workers and people engaging in fun conversation over beer and soju. In the middle of grilling the meat and telling you his Spain experience, you get a call from Jisung— the constant vibration on the table pulling you away from San's story.

"Sorry. It's Jisung." San chuckles and shakes his head, placing a few pieces of samgyeopsal onto your plate.

"No, please. Go for it." You give him a small apologetic smile before picking up the call. Jisung is at home, bored out of his mind and a bit worried. He knew he needed to give you time to do your thing, but as dinner time was approaching, he couldn't help but check in. He just needed to know that you were okay and at least enjoying yourself.

"Pachi."

"Hi, sorry." He says. "I didn't hear from you for awhile so I just wanted to call." You chuckle a bit.

"I'm okay."

"Yeah? That's good to hear." He furrows his brows at the background noise. "It's kinda.. loud? Where are you?"

"Eating with San."

"Oh, okay. Did you find a dress?"

"Sure did. Oops, I'll send pictures to you after." You did remember to snap a few photos of the dresses you tried on earlier.

"No worries. It's not too crazy there, right?"

"No. I'll be okay. We'll be done soon."

"Okay. Please text me when you get home."

"I will."

"Love you."

"Love you too." You softly set the phone down and look at San. "I really am sorry about him."

"No, it's okay." San shrugs. "I get it. He's your bestfriend and he cares about you alot."

"Too much sometimes." You tease, though you try to hint at the fact that you are very grateful for Jisung no matter what.

Meanwhile, Jisung finds himself getting hungrier by the minute, finalizing his delivery order that shouldn't arrive too long from now. He's home alone while his roommates are all out, so he tries to pick up where he left off in God of War: Ragnarok to make time fly by. The delivery food actually comes a half hour later, with Jisung shutting off the game before darting down the stairs to grab his food. Just as he's bringing it in, he sees Minho pull up and park— leaving the door slightly ajar for when he walks in.

"Yo." Jisung quickly looks over his shoulder as he continues to unbox his delivery food, quickly greeting Minho as he walks into the kitchen. "Surprised you're home early."

"Surprised you're home since you're usually taking all the food at Y/N's and Uncle Adrian's."

"That's not true at all and you know it." Jisung looks at Minho while he chuckles at him and grabs a glass for some water. "Seriously, why are you home early?"

"I just wanted to come home early and not do something for once. Catch up on sleep. Be lazy."

"We can play, if you want?"

"Eh." Minho shrugs after drinking some water. "Maybe later."

"I'm also surprised—" Jisung shakes his head. "Nevermind."

"Say it."

"No, you'll kill me and Y/N isn't around to save me."

"What, she's still in class?" Minho asks with a chuckle, confused at how long your pottery class actually was.

"No, she's out shopping for a dress."

"Alone? Shouldn't someone be with her if she's gonna be out for a bit?"

"Someone is with her." Jisung mumbles as he pours some of his soup appetizer into a bowl.

"And it's not you?" Jisung shakes his head. "Chan?" Jisung shakes his head again. "Seungmin? Why on earth would you leave her with Seungmin, though?"

"I didn't leave her with Seungmin. I didn't leave her anywhere, she just had other plans." Jisung grabs his food and tries to head up to his room. Which, he successfully does, but Minho is following closely behind. "Gonna watch some streams since you don't wanna play, see ya—" Minho kicks his foot out to stop his door from closing.

"Why are you acting so weird?" Minho nods at him and furrows his brows. "You're the one who told me to stop being weird when it comes to Y/N, you little hypocrite."

"I'm not being weird!"

"You are!"

"She's in good hands, alright? It's fine."

"She's with San, isn't she?"

"I never even said anything. "

"See, you're being fucking weird for no reason."

"Well, I don't know? It's kinda weird to tell you!"

"This was your idea in the first place, remember?" Minho sighs and crosses his arms. "I just wanted to know if she was okay. Besides, how do you know if she's in good hands with San? He doesn't even know anything about her like that."

"You really think JJ wouldn't have said anything to him?"

"I don't think so?"

"He's one of JJ's really good friends, I think he might know some portion of it."

"Then, he's not any better than you and I, is he?" Minho cocks his head to the side and looks at him.

"Please don't do that." Jisung sighs. "She's fine, okay? He seems cool. I think we can give him a little more than that."

"What's your plan behind this one?"

"Don't even say it like that, dude. For real." Jisung's brow is slightly furrowed, though this is something he fully expects from Minho. "I just thought it'd be cool for her to hang out with other people too. It doesn't hurt."

"Hm." Minho hums as he turns on his heel and walks towards his room.

"Where are you going?"

"Change of plans. Gonna head to the studio and work on some stuff."

"Wait, you're not upset, are you?" Jisung pouts a bit. He really didn't mean to make Minho upset even though he knows you're still a very sensitive subject to him. Plus, Jisung doesn't want this to spiral out of control. He'll give you some time, but he will tell you everything. He will.

"Upset?" Minho slings his bag over his shoulder and gives him a tiny pursed smile. "No. Can't be." There's a drip of sarcasm in his tone because of course he can't be. There's so many truths, feelings, opinions, clinging onto that statement alone. He's trying to convince himself that he can't be, but also, he knows this is the response he'd immediately get from everyone around him. And he hates that.

Because no matter what, they will never understand you two. They will never understand the thoughts, the feelings, that occupy his mind day in and day out— especially since the accident happened.

He feels.

No one seems to know that.

But to simply answer Jisung's question, yes. He is upset. He really hopes you're okay and that San is taking care of you. It's the least he can fucking do after charming you the way he did. He's upset because of many other things, he's upset because he finds himself dwelling on the past much longer than he needs to. He finds himself sinking into all the 'what if's' — finding it hard to focus on his present, to look forward to his future.

He's constantly sinking, with nothing in reach.

He heads to the studio just like he tells Jisung, but he doesn't have class. There's nothing scheduled at the studio, so there shouldn't be anyone around.

It's fine.

That's what he needs right now, anyway. Space to do his own thing, space to dance out all the frustrations. Space to shake off all this shit.

When he gets to the studio, he parks his car and unlocks the door with his own key; tossing his bag off to the side as he steps into the room. He instantly connects his phone to the speakers, blasting his more upbeat playlist throughout the room. He stretches as the mirrors vibrate to the beat of the song currently playing, lights dim and barely illuminating the space.

He lets everything go.

He just needs to, momentarily.

He lets the vibration sink through his body, letting it flow through in waves— just like with everything that's been happening. It's the only way he's been able to process. He has some choreography he needs to finish up before next class but that's the last thing on his mind right now.

The first wave, Minho felt numb. He couldn't believe how everything happened so quickly. You were just in front of him— only to be snatched away hours later. He wasn't sure what to do, how to gain power to change time, didn't know what life would be like with you. It was all too much to process knowing you were almost taken from him completely.

The second wave, Minho was angry, upset, frustrated; all the time. He had no outlet, and as fucked up as it sounds, this is how he brought Kat closer. He felt empty, he felt angry with himself, he felt like he needed some validation. Something to tell him he wasn't entirely at fault, that he was still a person who could be needed, wanted; that he wasn't a bad person although he did need to take ownership for some things at some point.

The third wave that he's currently riding, Minho has nothing else to give. Nothing else to process. He feels useless, powerless— he can't change time or bring anything back. There is simply nothing there and he doesn't know how to work with that in order to move forward. What can he change, how can he do better, when no one believes he can change and do better for you? No one wants to give him that. And quite frankly, they're slowly convincing him that he can't even give himself that.

Maybe it'll go back to the first wave and he'll go back to being numb. But Minho doesn't know what's worse— being numb because it's too much to process, or being numb because there is nothing else to process; nothing else to change, nothing to hang onto.

He doesn't know if he'll ever bounce back from this.

Minho is so into his thoughts as he dances without a strict choreo in mind, sweat dripping down his face as he takes a moment to catch his breath. He sits with his back against the mirror, regulating his breathing after consistently moving his body. He takes a quick sip of water, eyes darting to his phone lighting up on the counter. The vibration is cutting through the music, making Minho groan in annoyance at the interruption.

kat: roommates are gone

kat: lonely af

kat: can you come over? )):

He thinks about this, and to be honest, he still feels pretty shitty. It's a terrible excuse, but who else can he run to right now? Kat makes him feel good. Kat makes him feel better, at least, enough to push him through in the meantime.

minho: be over in a bit. at the studio.

Kat, however, will never be you. She temporarily fills the void, but she will never be you.

From before, from now.

kat: can u stop by for some food?

minho: i'm only coming by for a bit. i have to be up early tomorrow.

kat: yeah ofc whats new

Minho rolls his eyes as he sets his phone aside and continues to dance around the empty studio for a bit until he feels somewhat content. He drags his duffle bag to the separate staff locker room, quickly using the shower before changing into a fresh pair of sweats and a hoodie. He ruffles his damp hair a bit as he walks out into the fresh night air, tossing his bag into the trunk before making his journey to Kat's apartment.

At this point, he's not entirely in the mood to see her. But, he's here just like he says— and he only plans to stay for a quick minute before he's rushing home.

Just like he says.

"Oh, you really didn't stop by for food." Kat snickers a bit before stepping aside to let him in.

"Why would I when I said no?" Minho confusingly chuckles a bit. "Told you I was only coming for a bit. I'm beat."

"Uh huh." She says. "I missed you." She pouts. "I barely heard from you today." He watches her as she wraps her arms around his neck, kissing him on the lips even though he barely returns the effort.

"I was busy."

"You could at least tell me that." She whines as she laces her hand with his.

"Sorry." Is all he can say even though he doesn't really mean it. She is not you; from before, from now. "I'll let you know next time." He follows up and uses it as leverage to kiss her again. "I'm here now, aren't I?" He says in between kisses, sinking into her touch and her lips when she lets out soft moans against him.

This is right where he needs her to be. This is the release he needs, the temporary void he needs filled.

She knows what this is, for the most part. She knows Minho could never be serious with her, though she tries. Hoping one day, he will. Hoping one day, he'll finally move past you and give her a shot.

But, he won't. He never will. And if the accident taught him one thing, it's the fact that he will never, ever give you up again.

She takes the lead and rushes him to the room, clothes flying in all directions until they're decorating the floor. She pushes him onto the bed, legs dangling off the edge while she crouches down and wraps her lips around his length. He hisses a bit, fingers laced in her hair as he pushes her down more, and more.

More;

'Till she takes all of him.

He can't deny that it feels amazing, but he doesn't wanna leave it at that. He's not always a taker, only if Kat reassures that she wants to please him and him only. So, before he feels himself reaching his peak, Minho gently tugs her head off— praising her as he gets her on all fours. He's not wasting any time, no. He enters her and bottoms out quick, finding the perfect rhythm in no time.

He needs to get out.

He doesn't necessarily take his time as much as Kat wants him to. She's screaming his name like a mantra, head pushed against her pillow while Minho continues to do his work behind her. It doesn't take long before she's like putty in his hands and he's stupidly pulling out to spill his seed all over her ass, back.

He needs to get out. Now.

So, he comes back down from his high, regulates his breathing and hops off her bed. He's quickly throwing his clothes back on while Kat is confusingly doing the same. She's asking him why he's been doing this lately, and he doesn't really know how to explain to her that he's just feeling more and more disconnected to this whole thing— to her. She's still continuing though; arms crossed tightly against her chest as she follows Minho out to the door, tears threatening to spill over her bottom lid. He's not focused on her, to be honest, and he's exhausted. Not much is registering for him besides his lazy 'I'm sorry's' and 'I'll spend more time with you the next time I'm over.' But the one thing that does snap him out of everything is when Kat asks—

"It's because of Y/N isn't it?" He stops in his tracks right as he's about to swing the door open and turns over his shoulder to glare at her. "Ever since she woke up—"

"Don't." He says sternly. "You don't get to do that." His jaw clenches. "Do me a favor and don't bring Y/N up again." He swings the door and slams it shut, suddenly feeling emptier than he did before he got here.

Maybe this wave would be the hardest.

☁︎ FLASHBACK | HOSPITAL

"Are you going to come with us to the hospital to visit Y/N tomorrow?" Minho shakes his head at Seungmin.

"Probably not. You guys can go without me." He says softly as he scribbles some notes into his notepad for the small, upcoming café renovations.

"You sure?" Seungmin softly asks and all Minho can do is nod without meeting his eyes. Seungmin lets out a soft sigh before he grabs his keys sitting on the dining room table. "Gotta head back into the office really quickly to drop something off. See you later?"

"Yeah." Is all Minho says, still avoiding contact until Seungmin is out of the door. He lets out a deep sigh, dropping his pen onto the notepad.

He doesn't even remember what he needed to write.

He checks the time on his watch, hand close to hitting 4 o'clock. He groans to himself, shutting his notebook before grabbing his own keys from the other end of the kitchen table.

He hopes he doesn't regret this.

Though, he kinda does when he slaps the visitor tag on his sweater and proceeds to your room. Then, it grows when he stands at your doorway and sees you lying perfectly still on your bed. He digs his hands into his pockets and remains there for a moment, afraid to move closer, yet his feet aren't taking him away from your room. He musters up the courage about a min later, slowly walking towards your bed side.

Even through all the pain and hurt you've been through, you still looked so, so angelic.

"Hey." He says, close to a whisper— voice slightly cracking because he doesn't know what he's feeling right now as he looks at you. Is he angry at himself for coming here when things were't changing anytime soon? Is he angry he could've done better? Is he angry for the way the universe is playing such a sick fucking joke on him right now?

Because you're in reach and out of reach at the same time.

Minho gains more courage to pull his chair closer to your bedside so that he doesn't have to lean too far to get a good look at you. The only sounds filling the room are the beeping machines and the people passing in the hallway outside.

"Y/N." He calls your name as he gently brushes the hair back and away from your face. "Hope you're doing okay." He feels so stupid. Why would he say that? His thumb caresses your cheek before it slides down to your hand. It isn't too cold, but the warmth in your body has subsided.

The warmth in your body is fighting to stay.

"I-I—" He pauses to lick his lips. "I miss you." No response. "God, I miss you." He feels the tears welling up and his head drops. He holds your hand tightly and squeezes, hoping he can feel anything on your end.

But, nothing.

"I'm so sorry." He whispers just as he's remembering every detail about you, the moments he's shared with you, the feelings, your touch—

The way you smile, the way you laugh.

The way you always kiss his fingers and look at him in pure adoration.

The way you bring the sun and blue skies into every room.

"I fucked up and I'm so, so sorry." He continues to whisper as he cries harder, head falling near your lap as he continues hold your hand. "I'm so sorry." He repeats.

He should've kept his word.

He should've done better.

He should've protected you.

"I should've done better. I shouldn't have let you go, and I'll never forgive myself for being so fucking stupid." He looks up at you through his teary eyes before returning his head back near your lap. "I get it. I would never want you to be in pain. Or, to hurt. All I want is for you to be okay. But, if you can at least hear me right now—" He pauses as his crying intensifies. "Please don't give up on me. I know I fucked up and I know I have no right to ask you for this, but please don't leave me." It's barely audible through his crying, but he's hoping it will somehow reach you. "Please don't leave me."

☁︎ END

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[itsabouttimex2]

I been kinda busy so I'm late to the party but i came back to fulfill my duty of rambling about ABNJ. I hope your sister's recover is going (or already went) well. Gonna try to make this one brief since i see i have a lot of posts to catch up to!

- the whole moment with indirect declaration of love is so good and the insight into Macaques thoughts is really nice! Seeing characters thoughts and generally introspections is one of my fav things in writing tbh

- a vulnerable moment followed up by a shove. Is it just excitement to give them the clothes or some form of guilt?? Both maybe (This is probably overinterpration so in that case ignore it)

- flower symbolism my beloved <333 roses sprouting showing how Macaque starts to feel loved and Y/n is one taking care of them. (i didn't see them mentioned in fourth part but there is a big chance i could be misremembering. Did Rumble and Savage plant them? 👀). Also Dahlias and Tansies being in bloom emphasizing already negative feelings that exist in Macaque.

- are Savage and Rumble going after MK?? Hopefully they will just steal his phone or something because i doubt they would be on the winning side in actual physical fight with him.

That's all from me for now! At this point i should make account for commenting so i don't spam your askbox. Thank you for the work you put in and have fun watching season 5! Remember to stay hydrated! :]

I always love to hear your thoughts on A Brand New Journey! I intend to put out Part Seven soon- and I’m sorry that they take so long!

Ok, so a big part in general of this chosen route- Fatherly!Macaque as your mentor, that is- was literally built around this note that I’ve been sitting on for a while:

“Macaque has no one. Not since Wukong. Probably no one before that, and barely anyone afterwards. He has no family. He has no friends. Macaque is alone.

His own “Sworn Brothers” didn’t like him. Note that he has zero interactions with the Brotherhood outside of Wukong and Peng! Note that not even one of them calls him “brother”! They didn’t care about him!

Wukong wasn’t the most understanding of individuals, and Macaque ended up acting as a blind enabler instead of a friend. Together, hand in hand, they ruined probably the only genuine friendship either one had at that point.

Wukong found people who helped him grow. Macaque refused to leave the side of people who didn’t care for him, even if he wanted to at least hear out Wukong. Good influences and bad, one simian with a brash will to change and the other too cowardly to even run.

They deviated further from one another- fatally, this time.

Centuries spent dead and alone.

Then he’s back.

After so very long, Macaque is returned to life.

And he finds someone. And that someone cares enough to share their food, to share his home, to share their time, to share memories and warmth and company.

Macaque finds someone who cares about him, and he cares right back, so deeply that his feelings threaten to swallow him..

And then, for the very first time in all of his many centuries-

Macaque gets an “I love you”.

Who wouldn’t that break?

And then Macaque has himself a little internal monologue (signified by paragraphs and unflattering descriptions of himself) about how he views himself as a monster and doesn’t deserve Y/N…

And then justifies his actions by internally declaring himself a “villain” and pushing his cherished student away. But he also spends the rest of the chapter grabbing and pushing and pulling- because this is his kid, and he loves them (gods above, how he loves them!) so much that he doesn’t want to let go.

Y/N planted the roses themself, actually- roses symbolize fatherhood- they’re the official flower of Father’s Day, even! The tansies and dahlias are in bloom- this time with Macaque’s negative feelings towards himself!

Rumble and Savage aren’t going to do anything too bold without permission… but they are getting very antsy about all of this.

As always, thank you for the comments! I adore you sharing your thoughts with me!

[pink-sparkly-witch]

The Widow - Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven

Summary: Sam and Y/N are happily married, but everything changes after a fatal car accident leaves her a widow. The Winchester motto: "Family Don't End with Blood," takes on a whole new meaning for Y/N as she navigates her new normal with the help of her brother-in-law, Dean. But what no one can tell her, is what happens when she falls in love again?   

Pairing: Sam Winchester x F!Reader (past) | Dean Winchester x F!Reader

Warnings: angst, language, fluff

Words: 2,416

You can catch up here!

My Masterlist     AO3    Ko-Fi

Dean’s POV

Dean doesn’t feel better for the amount of whiskey he drank last night. He feels worse. Much worse. The guilt hasn’t been washed away like he’d hoped it would be; not just guilt that he’d fucked his brother’s widow, but also that he’d left her alone in his bed afterwards. That was not one of his finer moments, and if he could take it back, he’d have stayed there with her wrapped in his arms all night long.

Last night with Y/N was everything he could’ve imagined and more, but he knows not to hope for anything more than that. She’s far too good for him. Too kind. Too caring. Too beautiful. He doesn’t deserve her. Especially after he tricked her into kissing him and then took her to bed. And the hatred he had for himself just kept on coming. How could he do that?

He really fucked things up. He always does. Another reason he doesn’t deserve her – or rather, she doesn’t deserve him. He can feel tears prick at his eyes again, but sniffs them back as he hears movement from upstairs. Y/N will be down soon, and he’ll be damned if she sees him cry like a baby when he knows she’s hurting way more than he is right now.

As soon as she walks through the door, he looks down, feeling far too cowardly to look at her. “Morning, sweetheart. How’d you sleep?” He asks, trying to make himself look busy.

“Fine. Though it looks like you’ve had a rough night,” Y/N replies, and Dean can hear the tremor in her voice. He swears if he could punch himself in the face he’d knock himself out cold for what he’s done to her.

“Couldn’t sleep. You want coffee?” He glances up at her for the first time, but only because he hears her keys jangling.

“I have to go.” Y/N’s voice is monotone, and he squeezes his eyes shut, knowing that all her pain and anger is because of him.

“Sweetheart, I thought we were gonna talk about this? You promised me, good or bad,” he begs. Yes, she did promise him that, but he’s well aware that he shifted the goalposts on that promise when he took her into his bed.

“And we will,” her voice is trembling and her eyes are watering, and Dean would rather face the hounds of hell than see this much pain on her beautiful face. “But I can’t right now, okay?” She avoids eye contact with him as she turns to walk away.

“Y/N, please! Don’t walk away from me on this! It’s too important. You’re too important.” Dean knows he’s losing her, and desperately tries to stop her from walking out that door, because he fears that if she does, he’ll never see her again.

“And I said I can’t right now, Dean!” Her tears fall thick and fast and her words leave her in a sob. “I need some time with all of this, okay? It’s too much. And I’m meeting Jody soon. I’ll call you later, so why don’t you get some sleep now that I’m not in your bed,” she finishes with pure venom in her voice and wipes the tears from her eyes as she turns to walk out the door.

“Y/N! It’s not like that, I swear! You’ve got it all wrong!” Dean shouts, but is met with nothing but the sound of his door slamming.

Running after her and trying to get to her before she drives off, he swings the door open and sprints down the front steps, but he isn’t quick enough. Y/N is already in the car and is driving down the street.

“Son of a bitch!” Dean yells, not caring for his neighbours or the early hour, and goes back inside and slams the door shut. Picking up his cell phone, he calls the only person he trusts with something this big.

“Dad? I messed up with Y/N and I don’t know if I can fix it.”

“You gonna tell me what happened, son, or are you just gonna sit there and hope it goes away?” John asks, but Dean keeps his eyes fixed on the floor.

With a loud sigh, John sits next to him and also remains silent. Dean had always had a deep, sensitive side – just like his mother, John always told him – and Dean knew his father would sit right there next to him until he was ready to talk about it.

“I slept with Y/N,” Dean eventually murmurs, glancing up only when John lets out a low whistle.

“Didn’t she have a date last night?” he frowns, and Dean can see the cogs turning behind his concerned gaze.

“Yeah. It was the perfect date with the perfect guy,” Dean sighs, and drags his hand over his face.

“I’m not following here,” John chuckles. “If it was the perfect date with the perfect guy, why did she end up in your bed?”

“She came to me upset after the date because Jacob,” Dean scoffs his name, “apparently, was the perfect gentleman and took her on the perfect date and kissed her goodnight. But Y/N didn’t feel anything. She said she felt numb and then got even more upset asking me if Sammy was the only person she was supposed to be with, and if she was broken for not feeling anything with date dude.

“I tried to convince her she was wrong, that he just wasn’t the guy for her, but she was too far inside her head, you know how she gets. She was gonna go home, but I didn’t think she should be alone. I kissed her as a kinda experiment to see if she felt anything with me. I was expecting disgust, honestly, but she started to kiss back and it just…” Dean doesn’t finish his thought. Doesn’t need to, so he lets it hang in the air.

“And it led to you two having sex,” John nods in understanding of his son’s panicked babbling. “What makes you think you’ve fucked things up with her?”

“After, when she was asleep, the guilt I felt that I’d slept with Sammy’s wife and that I took advantage of her… it was killing me and I went downstairs and drank. And I cried,” Dean’s voice was cracking as he tried to keep his emotions in check. “And I begged him to forgive me for falling in love with his girl, and I prayed that she wouldn’t hate me in the morning.”

“You left her alone after sleeping with her? Dean, tell me you went back to bed?” John asks and curses loudly. “How could you do that? Do you know what she must’ve been feeling?”

“Dad–”

“No, you will listen to me!” John barks, and Dean is quick to shut his mouth and slump down in the chair. “You are the first person she’s been with since her husband and you left her alone? You say you felt guilty about it, how do you think she felt, Dean? Do you think she doesn’t feel guilty? Doesn’t feel like she has betrayed her husband by sleeping with his brother? Do you think maybe she woke up in the morning, alone, in a cold, empty bed and thought ‘oh, I’m just another notch on Dean’s bedpost,’ on top of the guilt and the betrayal and the shame, huh? Did you even stop to think about that?”

“I didn’t,” Dean admits sadly. “I got so caught up in thinking about Sammy and that I’d taken advantage of her that I never stopped to consider how she was feeling.”

“Y/N is not one to be taken advantage of, son. If she slept with you, it’s because she wanted to,” John states firmly before the two men share a moment of silence. Dean, at least, is thankful for a break in the interrogation and hopes a break in tension happens soon too.

“Listen, Dean,” John speaks, much calmer than he’d been before. “She’d chop off your balls if you tried something she didn’t want!” he smirks and, with a sad smile Dean nods in agreement with him.

“If you want my opinion, Dean, you need to sit down with her and talk about this and what comes next. And you need to accept how she feels and what she says.” John claps Dean’s shoulder and stands, making his way to the fridge and pulling out two bottles of beer.

“Nah,” Dean shakes his head, refusing the beer. “I think I’ll go to the garage for a few hours. Seems like a good time to bash the frame of that Mustang back into shape. Give me time to think a bit before I call her.”

“Don’t leave it too long, Dean. She needs to know she wasn’t a mistake,” John’s voice is firm and leaves no room for argument.

“Yes, sir,” Dean replies as he stands and puts his jacket on.

“And Dean? If you need it, you have my blessing to be with her. And I’m sure you have Sammy’s too. If you’re in love and will be happy together, then I support you. Sam would want her to be happy and to be with a good man. You’re a good man, Dean, but you need to fix this. I’m not losing both of them,” John warns and Dean nods.

“You won’t,” he promises. “I’ll fix it.”

Working out all the dents and scratches, and doing the welding work on the body of the beat up old Mustang was somewhat therapeutic to Dean, and he felt like he’d managed to work out most of his frustrations at himself within a few hours. Y/N had mentioned that morning that she was meeting Jody and he didn’t think she’d lie to him about something like that, so he’d give her a little more time before he went over.

The thought that if he called her, she wouldn’t pick up has been at the forefront of his mind, so he decided showing up at her house, knowing she’ll let him in even if it was reluctantly, is the better option. She’s too polite to turn him away, and he knows she wouldn’t make a scene at her doorstep with her nosy neighbours always watching from their windows.

As Dean cleans up the shop and puts away the tools he’s been using, his phone starts to ring. With a heavy dread settling in his stomach, he sees that it’s Jody calling, and he knows she’s going to tear him a new one.

“Hey, Jody,” he answers the call, trying to hide his nerves.

“How are you, Dean?” she asks, concern lacing her voice, and it takes him off guard.

“I’ve been better,” he chuckles sadly.

“I bet,” Jody responds.

“How’s Y/N?” Dean asks before holding his breath for the answer.

“I’d say about as good as you,” Jody laughs softly. “Look, Dean, I’m not calling to burst your balls, but I do need to know one thing.”

“Anything,” Dean agrees quickly.

“Do you regret what happened last night?” Jody asks and Dean’s heart shatters.

“What? No! Of course not,” he insists sincerely.

“She thinks you do, Dean.”

“Shit! She does? Is that why she couldn’t get away from me quick enough this morning?” Dean feels a small bloom of hope in his chest that this won’t end as badly as he thinks it will.

“Alright, I don’t have a lot of time here, Y/N’s in the restroom and will be back any minute, so I’m just gonna say this. You slept with her then left her alone in bed all night while you were drowning your sorrows in a bottle of whiskey. She wakes up to an empty bed, feeling guilty for betraying her husband, and when she comes downstairs she finds an empty liquor bottle and the first man she’s fucked since her husband avoiding eye contact with her. How would you interpret that, Dean?”

“Fuck!” Dean yells, feeling even worse than he did this morning if that was possible.

“You need to talk this out with her,” Jody advises sternly.

“You’re right, I do. And I’m planning on going to the house later. I wanted to make sure she was home from seeing you first,” Dean replies. “Can you do me a favour and text me when she’s on her way?”

“I’ll convince her to order dessert at The Bunker. It shouldn’t be hard, her favourite is on the specials,” Jody says, and Dean can hear the smile in her voice. “I can stall her for about an hour if you want to come by and drive her home.”

“Yes, ma’am, I’ll be waiting outside. Thanks, Jody,” Dean smiles.

“No problem, kiddo. Good luck!”

And with that, Jody ends the call. Smiling for the first time all day, Dean quickly finishes tidying up before hurrying home to shower and change into clean clothes before going to see Y/N. The last thing he needs is to be having a serious conversation and pouring his heart out while covered in grease and sweat.

Dean gets to The Bunker with time to spare, but he wouldn’t have had it any other way. He wants to be waiting for her. He wants her to know that she’s important to him and that he wants to fix things between them.

He parks Baby outside the restaurant and gets out of the car, leaning against her hood and waiting patiently for Y/N. When he sees her walking towards him, his heart skips a beat, and he can’t remember a time when he’d felt more nervous, and it reaffirms just how much she’s come to mean to him these past few months.

Dean watches as she laughs with Jody, but his heart sinks when he sees her stop suddenly, her smile fading as their eyes meet. He keeps his eyes on her and sees Jody lean in and say something to her.

After the brief conversation, the women hug and part ways, and Jody sends a wink and a thumbs up his way. Y/N lowers her gaze and slowly walks towards him. When he opens the passenger door for her, she finally glances up.

“Hey,” she says as she gets in the car.

“Hey, sweetheart,” he smiles, but he isn’t confident it reaches his eyes, because he’s so damn nervous about what comes next.

Next Chapter>>

@deans-spinster-witch @muchamusedaboutnothing @kazsrm67 @twinkleinadiamondsky @waters-2567 @leigh70 @waynes-multiverse @jesllianaquilesrolonsworld @chriszgirl92 @stoneyggirl2 @marilynnlew @ilovedean-spn2 @deans-baby-momma @acitygrownwillow @xxsovereignsarayaxx @frozenhuntress67 @lacilou @rach5ive @iprobablyshipit91

[wantmangojuice]

Peach Blossom Debt - finished - 26ch + 1 extra

Premise: Soft-hearted, romantic, destined-to-be-perpetually-single accidental-immortal MC is tasked by Heaven to play the villain in the love tribulations of two other immortals. He...does his gosh-darned best. But, also, what about MC's hopes for romance, huh, heaven? What if he wants to fall in love happily, too???

I didn't expect to enjoy this as much as I did (I only bought it on a whim because I wanted to finish a relatively-shorter danmei novel) but I really did!

MC Song Yao is such an endearing character. He's immortal but definitely still has the heart and sentiments of a mortal, he cares so so much, his narration is quite funny, and every other chapter I just wanna give him a hug.

I was really really rooting for Hengwen to be the ML almost from the beginning -- and I was right! Ha!

Related to the above bullet point, yes, the ML is not immediately apparent from the get-go (the sheer number of "Oh please be the ML" comments I had in my ebook copy whenever Hengwen shows up is hilarious) which I think adds to the fun/suspense. (I admit I caved halfway through and looked it up, though, 'cause I knew if it wasn't him I needed to brace myself for the disappointment hahaha.)

And on that note, regardless of whether they're the endgame pairing or not, I really enjoyed the twist and turns and reveals and feels that the Song Yao-Hengwen relationship had. I think one of the reasons they endeared themselves to me was that according to the book, they've been friends for over a thousand years, and their interactions certainly sold me on that. Everytime they're in a scene together there's an air of familiarity and comfort between them that I appreciated so much. Like, sure, there are complications, like how Song Yao has been pining for Hengwen for so long, and how Hengwen's nature as a never-been-mortal immortal makes it sometimes difficult for him to understand certain things about Song Yao-- but the bedrock of their relationship is that they're friends who can rely on each other first and foremost, and I enjoyed that.

The main couple getting their HE by the skin of their teeth arrrgh I love them.

Loved the interesting interplay of debt and "being fated" and how much of that really matters in the end (especially since it's revealed in the end that Song Yao's "destined to be perpetually alone" thing was actually all just hogwash).

What does it even mean when your fate is tied to someone else's, anyway? Question: If various karmic debts mean that you're soulmates with someone you don't love, and the person you love is not your soulmate, what do you do? Answer: You love the person you love anyway, even if you have to go to extreme impossible lengths shuffling those debts and those karmic ties around.

Honestly, the more I think about how things were resolved at the end of the book, the more I like it. Song Yao & Hengwen really found a way to make each other their soulmates: Song Yao by breaking all their other soulmate bonds, and Hengwen by everything he did afterwards that resulted in the two of them forming a karmic bond. They essentially became soulmates by choice, which is such a neat way to wrap things up.

(Interestingly, this is the second book I've read which plays with the "the person you fall in love with is not your soulmate and your soulmate is not the person you love" thing, the first one being Qi Ye, and even then Qi Ye was kind of a borderline case because there's some hints that WuXi was, in fact, Jing Beiyuan's soulmate after all. Just... something about the whole concept of "No matter what the bonds of destiny says, you are the one my heart has chosen" kind of gets me right in the kokoro.)

Probably gonna be jumping into the sequel of this book soon out of desperate hope to read more of these characters hahahahaha.

[cyten0]

A Symphony in Crimson

Act 1: A Movement in Black

Chapter 4

The third floor. It’s been smelling oddly sweet so far, but otherwise normal. The darkened walls and stars, the smell of sadnesses, and rooms and tears everywhere. There is the hair too, which is interesting. Human, but soaked in that same sweet smell. Sadness is different. Combined with the hunger, and it’s been a little distracting. The floors layout hasn’t helped either, but you got that nice picture! You��re glad Isa knew about that.

But now that you’ve finally got this crest, you decide to try it out. You open up the corridor near the mirror room, since that seems like a nice one and find… A writing room. There’s… Not gonna be anything here to help with that hair barrier, is there?

✸ Correct Stardust! Looks like a dead end. Might as well explore before looping back though

Stars. Well, Ok. You head over to a bookshelf and take a look, see if there’s… Great. It’s a horror anthology. You’re not a fan of horror.

▲ “Oooh Mira, looks like the kind of books you like, yeah? Horror books… This one looks massive! What’s this one ca-”

◉ “THAT'S THE "HANDSOME YOUNG MEN FALLING INTO BEAUTIFUL HEARTBREAKING MADNESS" HORROR ANTHOLOGY!!!”

You jump backwards, nearly tumbling!

◉ “DID… DID SOMEONE IN THE HOUSE HAVE THIS ALL THIS TIME?”

✿ “Did someone keep it from you???”

◆ “What is it, anyway?”

◉ “It’s an anthology about pure-hearted boys being subjected to awful monsters and horror situations!!!”

Yeah, you figured. Monster books are not your thing, for obvious reasons. But Mira likes them, so you listen as she talks about the stories, and you feel confident in not wanting to read this. You zone out for a bit, letting her chat...

◉ “And also sometimes the hero’s end up bonding with the monsters, too-”

✦ “WAIT WHAT”

Oh my stars really?!

▲ “Woah! That got Sif’s attention.”

✿ “Me too! That sounds crazy!”

◉ “Oh yeah! While it’s not often, there are a couple stories that have that. It’s pretty good!”

✦ “I need to see those! So bad! You have no idea!”

Oh my stars oh my stars REALLY? That’s a thing people wrote? Monsters not only being good people but ROMANCE??? You HAVE to see it!!!

▲ “I too, would like to see the monster romance stories.”

◆ “I’d like to see all of that actually. You’ll have to give us recommendations afterwards.”

You nod furiously! You have never been excited for a horror book before! You're practically vibrating with excitement!

◉ “Of course! I’d love to! I’ll even lend some of my favorites! Well… As soon as we escape a horror story of our own I guess.”

◆ “Hah! I’m looking forwards to it.”

… Right. You have to get them out first. But this is a dead end so… You’ll have to ask Mira about it after your done!

>>>

Can’t believe you missed a key on the second floor! So BLINDING stupid. And you're not gonna loop forwards, cause you're trying to conserve energy for the king, and whatever this key unlocks will probably take you right to them. So here you are, in the trap room. You kinda sped past this room a little last time, but you might as well look around to get your mind off things.

Hm, are those wood carving tools?

◉ “Oh, you interested in trying woodcarving again, Siffrin?”

✦ “! I mean, I’m not sure.”

You have mixed feelings about wood carving.

▲ “I still have the figurine you made last time! It wasn’t that bad, I’m sure you could get the hang of it!”

◆ “Really? Because last I checked, that thing was more glue and splinters then carving.”

✿ “Yeah, I think Frin almost broke their knife making it!”

◉ “It wasn’t that bad! At least you didn’t hurt yourself.”

...You actually did stab yourself pretty badly... But you put it back together before anyone noticed, so it’s fine!

✦ “I’ll just stick to tinkering.”

◆ “Indeed. No shame in focusing on your talents.”

Maybe not for most... You should be good at it. You have to find a way to, at some point. It was one of Siffrin’s hobbies, and you should be able to do it for them. But… You guess tinkering is close enough for now.

You grab the key and move on.

>>>

As you enter the room at the end of the corridor, you find an empty room, with nothing but a statue of the change god. Is… Is that it? You’ve checked nearly every other room in the house, you don’t have anything else...

▲ “Well, I thought there’d be something in this room but…”

✿ “BUT IT’S A CRABBING DEAD END!!!!!!!”

◆ “Language”

◉ “But there’s an intact statue of the Change God over there… Isn’t it the first we’ve seen one in the house?”

...Huh. She’s right, it’s the only one. You decide to take a closer look. Maybe there’s something? This is your last option. If you can’t find something here, you’ll have to start taking drastic measures...

Your party starts to pray. You… Decide to join them. You know they likely won’t care for you, but… For the other’s sake, you pray. It’s all you can think of to do right now.

In a sudden flash of light, you feel something in your hands! It’s.. A knife?!? Shaped like a key???

◉ “Siffrin?? Wh-What are you holding there???”

✿ “A KNIFE!!!!!!”

▲ “Did, Did the change god give it to us???”

◆ “Huh??? No, it can’t-”

◉ “I think th-they did!!! With it, we can-”

With another light, you feel the world fall out around you, as you hurtle across a pure white realm not your own, emerging back in the main room. You all look around, in disbelief. There. There’s no way…

◆ “What the-”

▲ “We’re back here?”

✿ “The Change God beamed us here!!!”

You all stand there in disbelief.

And you… They… They gave it. To you.

They… They trust you? They answered you?

You feel tears down your cheek. They… They have to know what you’ve done, far better then what little fragments you can remember, but still…

◉ “Siffrin? You Ok? You're crying.”

✦ “I… Yeah. Just. A little overwhelmed.”

◆ “Whatever Deity gave us this knife, thank you.”

You hold the dagger close. And say quietly under your breath, so no one else can hear.

✦ “Thank you. For forgiving me.”

You walk forwards, and cut through the wall of hair in a single blow, putting your inhuman strength behind it’s blade. The knife shatters under the strain, but it’s alright. You can take it from here.

You have a king to beat.

>>>

You're well fed, thanks to Bonnie (Siffrin had good taste, those fritters were FANTASTIC), and you are all ready. It’s time. You clutch the broken hilt of the key dagger to your heart.

You enter into the final hallway. Towering above you, as their bright locks fill the room, sits the king. Their darkened, star adorned armor covering their form, their hands obscuring their face. Still as a statue, until you approach, and they begin to stir.

♔ “Ah….. Ah….. Young ones…. Are you….. here to kill me…..?”

You all stare at them, readied. Determined. He first turns to Mirabelle.

♔ “Oh…. Young lady…… You stand for Change Themselves, do you not…..?”

He pauses, awaiting a response.

◉ “You have denied the entire country of change. Of life itself. And we won’t let you win.”

He sits solemnly, and then lifts his head to see you all.

♔ “…. A shame….. I just want the world to be safe as it is……... Frozen forever in this perfect state……….. And the rest of you……?”

▲ “You’ve hurt too many, and we need to stop you! For all of Vaugarde!”

◆ “This country shouldn’t be confined to history yet.”

✿ “y-Yeah! You won’t get away with this!”

✦ “We can’t afford to let you win.”

The king stares, unmoving, then with a sudden snap, turns to face you. He stares you down, pure hatred in what little of his face you can see. There is a cold, icy rage to his voice as he speaks.

♔ “You….. Bright one…. Do you remember?”

W-What? Do they...? How do they know it’s you? How do they remember?!? Even you can barely get anything! Play it dumb, play it dumb!

✦ “R-Remember what?”

♔ “….. What cruel irony……”

♔ “In this battle between eternity and the end…… We shall fight…..”

As he lifts himself from the ground, is voice becomes booming, filling the room.

♔ “AND WE SHALL SEE WHICH SIDE THE UNIVERSE FAVORS”

As you pull out your weapons, the king begins to channel immense craft energy. A swelling power begins to fill the room, so potent it’s nauseating.

♔ “… For the sake of the rest of you, I shall be merciful…….. And give you time to come to terms with the end.”

You can feel this energy so clearly. It’s so potent and deadly. It’ll kill you all if you can’t stop it!

✦ “Isa, defense! Everyone, we have to stop him NOW!”

You all try and launch yourself at the king, trying to disrupt them. You launch yourself at the king, and as your craft empowered strike pierces through his armor, he does not so much as flinch. You strike, as fast as you can, snapping the bones in your arm apart just for more flexibility. Even Odile’s crafts are barely hurting him. You're doing damage but… There’s no time!

A wave of destructive power washes over you, striking you with the force of a tidal wave, as you all feel your bodies crumple and break as their flung halfway across the room.

It hurts. It’s so rare for things to hurt. But it hurts so much, You can barely move!

The king starts to move towards the others. He’s… He’s going to finish them off! You. Will. Not. Let. Him!!!

You unfurl your tendrils out of your body, and grapple the king’s hand before it can strike. The king turns towards you, enraged.

♔ “I knew it…..”

Weakly, you call out to your party.

✦ “Run!”

They seem shocked, seeing your monstrous nature, but only briefly. Bonnie, mostly uninjured, stumbles, then flees. The others try and pick themselves up, but they're too weak to move!

The king struggles in your grasp, fighting it, before he has enough and takes his other hand and brings it down on you, as it crushes you, you barely have time to squirm before your heart cracks under the weight of the blow.

《《《《《《

AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!

STARS that hurts so much!!!! You fought back the pain of the first blow, but that second blow, you were barely holding yourself together! It still hurts, even now, it hurts so blinding MUCH.

You breathe, slowly settling yourself. Putting yourself back together.

Ok. So. King is. A lot tougher then you expected. As your senses start to come together, and the pain fades, you can start to think a little. You can’t believe the king defeated you all in ONE hit! How did he even get so strong? No human should be that powerful, You should know!

You basically have two options. Either stop him before he can do that attack, or find a way to protect you all before then. That’s fine. There has to be a way to do that. Mira can do some elaborate healing crafts, and defense isn’t that far off. Maybe she has an idea!

… But… The king… He’s… Is he from there too? …You don’t want to take another life from there.

...You’ll talk with loop. Get their opinion.

You’ll find a way forwards.

>>>

You sit on a branch of the favor tree. Loop looks across at you. Silently. Behind their mask, their face is unreadable. Not that you were ever that good at reading faces, but still… They seem to be waiting for you to speak.

✦ “… Did you know? About the king?”

✸ “Which part, Stardust? Quite a lot happened there, in very little time!”

✦ “That they're from the same place as Siffrin.”

✸ “Well, it seemed likely. I mean, no one knows where they came from. Not surprising, in hindsight!”

✦ “I-I don’t know if I can fight them. I can’t…”

✸ “Stardust.”

Loop’s firm response shocks you out of your worries.

✸ “… Look, whatever the king’s story might be, right now, they are threatening all of Vaugarde. They're about to end an entire country, all over again. And you aren’t going to change their mind at this point. What happened to them does not excuse their actions.”

It’s cold comfort. But you suppose it’s true. You don’t feel right being their judge, but you suppose you're just the executioner. Everyone else has made it clear where they stand. And they have deemed him a monster.

✸ “...And don’t forget, even with your loops, you're on a ticking clock.”

...Right... There’s not a lot of wiggle room. Even if you wanted to try, you’ll only be looping for so long before sadnesses won’t be enough. They're like drinking coffee, plenty of energy and it’ll fill your belly, but barely any real sustenance. It’ll catch up eventually, and if you're not done here by then…

✦ “...I guess there’s no option.”

✸ “Right! So that just leaves a way to get past that attack. And maybe see if there’s a way to find out how the king recognized you! Might be able to get a little breathing room, who knows?”

✦ “Guess I could always ask him, right? Not like he’d know after.”

✸ “That… Might work? But I don’t trust him. Might be a bad idea.”

✦ “Better then nothing. Ok. That’s a solid plan. I'll get on it.”

✸ “Want to grab a bite to eat first?”

Oh, right! You should do that! How did you forget that?… Ugh, it’s starting to catch up already, isn’t it? You likely won’t have much time at all before your hunger starts catching up...Oh well, you nearly have this all handled, so you should be fine. You nod, and Loop summons the sadness, which is killed and eaten quickly.

Alright. Let’s go Siffrin. You have a king to beat.

✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸✸

...They're getting close. You are pretty sure they can bypass that attack, and not resort to the same measures as you did. They're hungry, but not so hungry they can’t win, or will lose it. If they can beat the king, without loosing the others, then it should be over.

But… You think it might not. You hope it will. You can’t say it won’t. But now you can think it through… There might be more to this then expected. And if it is… then things will get much more dangerous… He’s getting hungry.

[giuli328]

Agnosis | Eddie Munson Fanfiction

chapter two: i speed at night

wc:925

synopsis and masterlist here

previous chapter

next chapter

—————————————————————————————————————

Two weeks had passed since Eddie met her. He felt like he was losing it, more than usual. For the past 13 nights, he spent his time at The Roxy, not wanting to waste any time at The Whisky A Go Go or The Viper Room, because if he was at The Roxy, there'd be a higher chance he'd run into her. At least that was his mindset about it. It was starting to feel hopeless though, and he cursed himself for not asking for her number when he had the chance.

After a couple hours and no sight of her, Eddie steps out of The Roxy to smoke. As soon as he pulls out his lighter, he sees some guy get thrown out of the nearby venue. He chuckles to himself at the sight of some loser getting told off by whatever girl he was trying to harass. That is, until he recognizes the voice. He follows the noise and quickly puts the unlit cigarette back into the pocket of his jacket.

He watches as she finishes yelling at the drunken idiot outside and heads back into the venue unbothered. He follows in afterwards, cursing himself for not thinking of checking the other venues. Of course she wouldn't just be going to The Roxy. What was he thinking? She's probably played every venue on the strip.

He follows her through the smoky crowd of people in the dim colorful lighting. He loses her pretty quickly, but continues forward looking for her. He makes it near the bar and there's a sudden tap on his shoulder from behind him.

"Are you following me now?" she says jokingly.

"Dunno what you're talking about. You're the one who tapped my shoulder sneakily. I didn't even know you'd be here" he smiles.

"Oh really? So you're just in here alone to see the Cyndi Lauper cover-band then?" she chuckles.

Eddie glances towards the stage, he hadn't noticed them until now. He laughs and glances back at her with a playful guilty expression.

"I thought that was you outside. So you're stalking me?" she jokes.

"No. The opposite really, I haven't been able to track you down. I've been looking around The Roxy like an idiot when you've been here instead" he says, hoping he's not coming off too strong.

"You've been looking for me?" she says in a slight surprised tone. There's a bit of a twinkle in her eyes when she talks to him. He thinks he'll melt away if she keeps looking at him like that.

"Yeah. I mean I've kinda been beating myself up over not asking for your number the last time we talked. I can't stop thinking about you" Eddie admits with his signature smile.

"You must use that line a lot" she chuckles.

"I've never been interested enough in someone to think about them nonstop for two weeks" he says in a more genuine tone.

She thinks it's sweet. "Do you have a pen?" she smiles.

Eddie smiles and immediately starts scrambling trying to find a pen. "Wait right there" he says as he excitedly runs to the bar to ask for a pen and a napkin, then hurries back and hands them to her.

She chuckles as she writes down her number and hands it to him. As he carefully folds it and puts it into his pocket, he asks "are you hungry?"

"I could eat" she says.

————————————————————————

They're sitting in a cozy booth at a nearby pizza place. Eddie told her to order her favorite and he's eating it gladly. He's never been much of a picky eater, especially when he was as hungry as he is now. He's enjoying the pizza so much that there's pizza sauce all over the corners of his mouth. He's hopeless. So, she can't stop herself when she helps the poor guy out and gently wipes the corners clean with a smile. He feels like his heart's gonna explode and he really hopes the warmth in his face isn't as noticeable as it feels.

It is.

She smiles and breaks the comfortable silence. "You can totally say no. But do you think you could give me a ride home?" she asks sweetly.

"Yeah! Yeah I could do that" he answers a bit too eagerly, he realizes. He almost stands up before he realizes they haven't even finished eating yet.

————————————————————————

On the ride back to her place, Eddie can't help but steal wanting glances towards her. She would be giving him the same glares if she wasn't gripping the side of her seat, staring at the road in panic. Dio's The Last in Line is in the tape player of Eddie's van and she chuckles at the irony of the song that's currently playing, "I Speed at Night".

"What's so funny?" he asks with a smile, looking at the road.

"The song. It's fitting. I have no idea how you got your license" she chuckles.

"Oh I don't have a license" he says with a straight face.

"What?!" she exclaims.

He bursts out laughing. "I'm joking. I'm sorry. I do have my license." He didn't mention the part where he wouldn't have gotten it if Wayne didn't force him to go in exchange for the van. He thought it was the most boring twenty minutes he'd ever spent behind the wheel.

"Jerk" she punches his shoulder playfully as she lets out a chuckle of relief.

He smiles at her warmly, and she notices that for the rest of the drive, his driving is careful.

[silverynight]

How to ask a cheerleader out

<---Previous

Chapter 5

"I think it's the right thing to do," Izuku whispers to Uraraka, leaning closer so no one, besides Iida, hears the conversation they're having in the hallway.

"You're saying it as if you have to do it!" His friend rolls her eyes, looking upset already. Iida nods over her shoulder.

"Uraraka is right, Midoriya."

"Ha! See?" The girl smiles triumphantly, pulling Izuku closer to her. "Now let's go!"

"I kinda want to talk to him. I still feel bad."

"Well, you shouldn't. Feeling bad for rejecting someone you don't like is ridiculous. I mean, what were you gonna do? Date him so he doesn't get sad?"

"I just want to check on him," Izuku mumbles, looking at his scarred hands. No matter what his friends say, he still feels bad for him.

"Don't, he's a jerk. He probably doesn't feel anything anyway. Besides, I watched the whole thing, you were very kind."

Izuku shakes his head, noticing how Uraraka rolls her eyes and Iida sighs at the same time.

"It'll be just a minute."

"Fine! We'll be waiting for you!"

Izuku takes a deep breath and walks towards Monoma as he waves dismissively at his friends. Katsuki has been so kind to him lately and after his apology he has inspired Izuku to do things right, to do better. Because turning down Monoma has been haunting him this whole time, especially because the blond stormed off after Izuku tried to explain to him that he didn't see him that way.

"Hi, Monoma!" He smiles. "How are you doing?"

"My day was perfect until you showed your stupid face up," the blond grins, although the joy doesn't reach his eyes.

"Oh... it won't be long, I promise!"

"Wait. Did you come here to beg?" He smirks. "Because I'm willing to–"

"No, I'm sorry... I just wanted to apologize," Izuku cuts him off because he wants to make sure he doesn't get the wrong idea. "I didn't want to hurt your feelings. But we can still be friends if you wa–"

"Shut up!" Monoma huffs. "I don't care! I asked you out because I had nothing better to do! You didn't hurt me because I don't give a fuck about you. Now get out of my face!"

"Oh... O‐Okay."

When he turns around, he notices Iida doing his best to hold a very furious Uraraka, hissing a couple of curses in Monoma's direction.

"Did you hear that?"

"He was very loud!" Iida tells him, finally releasing the girl as soon as Monoma gets out of sight.

"It's okay, I'm fine," Izuku assures them after noticing the concern on their faces. He truly feels good because at least he knows now that he didn't actually hurt Monoma. "I'm glad he's fine."

Uraraka rolls her eyes, but puts an arm over Izuku's shoulder afterwards.

"I can't understand you; I've seen you getting mad at him before... Why didn't you tell him something now?"

"It's different; the other times he was bullying someone and I couldn't just watch that happening," that was exactly one of the reasons he was so surprised to the point that he couldn't talk when Monoma asked him out; Izuku had stopped him from hurting other students so many times before that to him it didn't make sense. He thought Monoma hated him.

Well, maybe now he does.

"Are you okay, Midobro?"

Izuku was so immersed in his own thoughts, he didn't see Kirishima coming until he was right next to him, although he wasn't the only one distracted apparently because Iida and Uraraka get startled as well.

"I'm fine."

"Good. I just... I saw you talking with Monoma," Kirishima trails off, which is not very common when it comes to him. He looks nervous, but also deeply concerned, it's a little bit confusing. "He's usually a jerk to everyone so if he said something mean to you–"

"Oh, no! It wasn't about... it's not that important, really!" Izuku assures him. "I'm fine!"

"I'm glad," Kirishima nods, although he doesn't look relaxed at all. Uraraka is already narrowing her eyes at him. "Well... I'll see you later!"

"That's weird," Uraraka blurts out suddenly.

Now it's Izuku's turn to roll his eyes.

"He's just worried about me. You're reading too much into it! Come on, let's go to our next class!"

***

"I think you shouldn't ask Midoriya out."

Katsuki rolls his eyes at the sky and then again at Kirishima when shitty hair hovers over him with his eyes shadowing with ridiculous concern. They have talked about that a couple of times; his Izuku is not going to find out and Katsuki is going to give him anything he wants as soon as they start dating.

"It'll be fine!" Kaminari makes a dismissive gesture with his hand; he's been on Katsuki's side almost from the beginning and he refuses to think about that as a bad sign.

"I saw Monoma talking to him yesterday," Kirishima comments, finally collapsing next to Kaminari and Katsuki.

"So?"

"What do you mean 'So' aren't you worried about it?"

To be completely honest, Katsuki is not even sure himself how can he make it look like he's calm because he's anything but.

He's panicking at the moment. But he knows Monoma wouldn't do that because he wants to watch Katsuki failing on his own (which he won't) so it wouldn't make sense for him to tell his nerd about the bet.

Right? Katsuki has never wanted to be right in his life so bad before.

"Do you know what they were talking about?" Kaminari asks exactly what Katsuki is dying to know.

"No, but Midoriya said it wasn't important and he didn't look upset at all," shitty hair admits.

Although that's not exactly a response, it makes Katsuki feel a little bit better. Was it Monoma making fun of Izuku like he does with everyone else? That would be incredibly stupid on Monoma's part because Katsuki is more than willing to hurt him if that was the case, but at the same time, it'd be a relief.

"I should ask Mina about it. She probably knows and even if she doesn't, I'm sure she'll find out."

"Don't," Katsuki growls, feeling suddenly determined. "I'll go see Izuku myself."

He needs to know. But he's almost sure it didn't happen.

***

The relief he feels when he watches Izuku beam at him from the other side of the gym is almost overwhelming for Katsuki.

"You came to watch us practice again, Kacchan?" The nerd is already pulling away from a confused Todoroki (which makes Katsuki feel incredibly smug) and rushing towards him happily.

"I only came to see you," he admits, surprising Izuku and himself in the process; he watches as the nerd's freckles disappear under a lovely blush, knowing he's probably as red as Izuku is at the moment.

"Really?" Izuku looks so pleased Katsuki thinks that maybe embarrassing himself in front of him wasn't that bad after all.

The blond nods, rubbing the back of his neck nervously, pretending he doesn't hear Ashido's giggles in the background. The other cheerleaders seem to be really curious about their conversation.

"I'll stay here while you finish. I'll try to do some homework in the meantime."

"And you call him nerd?" Ashido asks with amusement, prompting the green haired boy to chuckle.

"She's right, Kacchan! You are a nerd!" Izuku giggles and it must be the proof that Katsuki is ridiculously besotted because he can't quite get mad at him because of it.

"Shut up, nerd," he blurts out, knowing he's trying to hold back a smile and failing miserably.

He should ask him out. This is the perfect opportunity.

"Midoriya, are you coming?" Todoroki asks suddenly; Katsuki can't help but feel a wave of irritation towards half and half at that moment.

"In a minute!"

"Are you free after practice?" Katsuki blurts out, feeling stupidly proud of himself for not stammering the question.

"Yes! We all are! Where do you want to go? I can text my friends!"

"Actually, I'd like for us to go alone. I-I mean... just the two of us, as a date."

It's concerning how fast his heart is beating at the moment; Katsuki can't help but remember the kiss on the cheek which predictably makes it a lot worse. He knows his face is completely red.

"A d-date?" Izuku stammers, looking like a strawberry, albeit a very cute one.

"It's okay if you don't want to..."

"I'd love to, Kacchan!" Izuku says, surprising the blond. "I have to go practice now, but I'll be back so you can take me wherever you want!"

Alright. Now Katsuki is sure he won't get any homework done because he'll be too busy thinking about his date with Izuku.

He wants to make him happy. It's the only thing he wants and... maybe another kiss.

There's no need to panic. No need to panic at all.

***

Next--->

Patreon

[skzhocomments]

Mafia Book #2 - PART II - The Withered Rose - Chapter 1 - I'm a ruin

Story masterlist - please consult it for the summary of the story, trigger warnings etc.

General masterlist

PART I - The Black Iris

Chapter 1 (current chapter) - Wattpad | AO3 | Chapter 2

---

PART II - The Withered Rose

Chapter 1 - I'm a ruin

chapter word count: ~4.1k words

~Chan’s POV~

~4 years ago~

What the fuck is going on…?

Everything feels… blurred.

Like I’m in a state of inertia.

Ugh… My head hurts so bad. Why won’t Felix wake up?

“Felix…” I mutter, aware that it won’t make any difference. Felix is not going to wake up any time soon, according to Jeongin. Not with the wounds he has. “Why the fuck haven’t you worn a bulletproof vest?”

Of course, Felix stays silent, his eyes still closed. He looks peaceful, like he’s sleeping.

Well, I guess he is sleeping.

“Brother, you can’t go like this…” I mutter again. “You have to wake up soon so I can scold you properly. I’ll give you a good beating once you’re healthy again. How dare you be so careless during our most important mission?”

I sigh.

Damn, this is fucking hard. I feel my eyes getting all watery. I clear my throat, trying to swallow the tears back.

“Uhm… Minho killed Scarlet Rose’s Boss, by the way. He’s the best, isn’t he? And then he found Hyo… and you…”

I breathe in a bit, trying to calm myself. Hyunjin will be here soon, and I have to be composed when he gets here. He can’t see me in this state.

“… We… I lost… Everything, Felix. Emilia… She betrayed you. She betrayed us. It’s so hard to believe though… Minho is out to get her right now, and we’ll get revenge for what she put you through… Fuck.” I curse, as a tear rolls down my cheek. I wipe it away immediately.

What am I supposed to do when Minho brings her?

Do I shoot her? Can I even do that?

“Chan?” Hyunjin’s voice drags me out of my head, and I look up. He seems… horribly distraught. We all are.

“Oh, Jinnie. You’re here.”

“Yeah.” He swallows and avoids looking at Felix’s bed. “You can go rest for a bit…”

“Thanks.” I force a smile and head towards the kitchen.

“Chris!” Hyo exclaims. “How are you? How’s Felix?”

Jeongin is bandaging her leg, and I am once again reminded of what Emilia has done to them.

“Felix is okay. Hyunjin’s with him. How are you two? Is the wound deep?”

“Mhm. But it’s gonna heal well.” Jeongin replies, avoiding my gaze. “We’re done here.”

He stands up and looks like he wants to leave. He must also have a lot on his mind, but in times like this, being alone is not a good idea.

“How about we order something to eat?” I suggest, and Hyo nods enthusiastically. “Jeongin?”

“… okay.” He replies and sits down, so I follow him.

We all stay silent for way too many minutes. No one really wants to say anything. We are distressed after all the trust we had has been completely shattered.

“It’s been such a shit day, hasn’t it?” Hyo speaks after a while.

“Mhm. I think this is the first time we’ve ever successfully finished a mission and felt so shitty afterwards.” I try to joke, but the words I speak sound weird, like I’m dragging them out.

“I can’t believe Emilia did that to us…” Hyo says in return, and she starts crying again. She’s been crying almost non-stop since we got back from the Rose Manor, and everything that went down keeps running through my head repeatedly.

Not only am I extremely sad, but it’s also really hard to contain my anger.

How dare Emilia shoot Felix and Hyo?

How did it end up like this?

What signs did I miss?

We don’t say anything anymore. It’s difficult to speak when words sound so distorted. Hyo lost a friend, Jeongin lost someone he truly cherished, and I… I lost everything I’ve ever loved.

I’m not sure I’m ready to confront Emilia yet.

I hope Minho is going to take a little while longer to find her…

~

We eat in silence — or rather, we play with the food, for no one has any appetite — and when we’re done, I stand up and clean everything. It’s easier to keep my mind busy this way, forcing it to think about pointless stuff like where the forks should go and how to fit each tray in the trash can so that it looks somewhat pleasing and arranged. Even if it’s just thrash, everything needs to have an order, especially since my mind is so erratic.

When I return to the table, the same deafening silence greets me as I sit back down. We’ve never looked so bad before, and I certainly have never felt this way. Jeongin looks like a train hit him, and Hyo… She actually looks surprisingly collected.

Maybe she’s just blocking out the bad memories to protect her mind.

Damn.

How did things get this fucked?

How…?

I’m about to say something, to attempt to be a leader and reassure my team that everything is going to be fine, even if Hyo was close to losing her leg, Jeongin’s heart is broken, and I don’t feel like myself anymore. I want to open my mouth, but words don’t have enough time to come out as we all hear the front door open hastily.

Is Minho back?

Did he already find her?

I feel myself sweat and hope it’s not Minho. Looking down at my hands, I realise they are in fists, my nails pressed against my palms. It’s not even painful. I can’t feel anything but an impending sense of doom.

It can’t be Minho already. It’s been too little time.

I’m not ready to kill her.

We turn our heads towards the entrance of the kitchen, our stares blank, and wait. Seconds are passing by so slowly; it feels like forever.

Emilia?

“Emilia?!” Jeongin exclaims and gets up, running towards her to embrace her.

Fuck, if only I could, too.

No, what am I thinking about?

I can’t. Hyo’s burning gaze tells me as much. She did something unforgivable.

I have to be strong and see past my love for her.

I have to.

“Chan, how’s Felix?!” Emilia asks. She’s a good actress, and I almost chuckle. She looks so worried, it’s funny, even. My anxiety is slowly melting away, replaced by something else. An emotion almost stronger.

Anger.

“Shade… bold of you to walk in here like this.” I say, and notice confusion written all over her face. I must be imagining things.

The human brain is a funny thing. You hope to see something to the point where you actually see it, even if it’s not there.

Emilia can’t possibly be worried. She shot Hyo and Felix. She is just trying to play with me again.

Anger.

“I don’t know what you-”

Does she think I wouldn’t find out about what she’s done?

I’m baffled.

“I’m barely holding myself together right now. Please, tell me… what the fuck did you do to Felix and Hyo?”

“I- I didn’t do anything!” She almost screams, and I’m seething with rage.

Don’t let her fool you.

Don’t let her get under your skin.

“Hyo, she’s the one-”

“She’s lying!” Hyo screams at the top of her lungs, tears streaming down her face once again. “After what you’ve done to us, you dare to come back here?! How could you shoot me and Felix?”

“What?! I didn’t- Chan, you have to believe me. Look, she-”

I can’t hear this any longer. Each word Emilia says angers me to no end, and I’ve never in my life felt the need to slap someone so badly. I need her to shut up before I lose my cool.

I need her to just shut up.

“Get out.” Is what I say instead, hoping she’d just listen. If only she does, I might not have to kill her. She could just go. I would let her go. I would let her leave.

Fuck.

This is so hard.

Please leave.

My consciousness is fighting a harsh battle between the anxiety bubbling in my stomach, the boiling anger in my head and the heartbreak in my chest. It’s harder and harder to keep my composure, to stay strong.

If only she left.

“Wh.. what?” She asks hesitantly, and when I look into her eyes, my heart breaks. Despite what she’s done, I still love her. I bite my lip and muster all my energy to drive her away before I do something I’d regret.

I’m losing this battle I’m fighting, and I can feel everything slip away through my fingers.

Leave.

“You heard me. Get the fuck out of here and never come back.”

“But- but Chris-” She tries to come close to me, to touch me, but I can’t let her do that. She’s played me for far too long.

Fuck.

Just fucking go, Emilia.

“Don’t fucking touch me.” I say, my voice barely coming out of my chest.

It hurts.

Please go.

Please.

I plead in my head, but she just won’t fucking back down.

She tries to touch me again, and I feel myself erupting like a volcano. I slap her, but she just keeps.fucking.coming.

“I said, DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME!” I scream so loud, my words are ringing in my ears, and I shove her away from me with all my force. It feels like she’s trying to provoke me, and I’ve never been angrier.

I’ve never lost my composure like this before.

My anger won, and it’s all her fault.

It’s all her fault.

It’s all her fault.

It’s all her fault.

If I say it enough times, maybe I’ll believe it. It would make sense that I slapped her.

She tried to kill Felix.

She shot Hyo.

It’s all her fault.

Yes… I have to do this.

I have to…

… I have to kill her…

“Chan-” Jeongin tries to intervene, but I won’t have it.

“Go check on Felix, will you?” I command harshly and watch Jeongin get out of the room reluctantly.

I breathe in a couple times and try to calm myself down, but then I look at Hyo again, who’s still crying, and every time I close my eyes, all I can see is Felix’s body lying on the bed, so I just can’t look at Emilia anymore.

I hate her.

I love her.

I hate her.

I hate her so much.

I love her.

Fuck, why is this so confusing? If only she’d just fucking go!

“For what you’ve done, I should kill you right here and now. You somehow managed to make me fall for you. How stupid was I?!” I pull out my gun and point it to her head. My grip is so hard, it hurts. The gun is pressing into my palm, into the little crescents made by my fingernails, and it hurts.

It hurts.

My chest hurts.

Or is it my hand?

My hand hurts.

I…

What is going on?

It’s like I’m in the grey zone.

I so desperately want to kill her, to avenge Felix and Hyo, but my hand is trembling way too much and just won’t move when I try to press my finger on the trigger. I just have to pull the trigger, and everything will be over.

Pull the trigger.

Pull the trigger.

Pull the trigger.

Just DO IT!!!

…

I can’t do it.

Why?

I so desperately want her to live as well, to find out it’s all been a hoax, a horrible nightmare. I want to wake up tomorrow next to her, I want her to whisper in my ear that she loves me, just as she’s done so many times, and I want to find out that somehow this day never happened.

I once saw a picture of an on the internet. It said ‘Today has been cancelled. Go back to bed.’

Maybe today was not real. Nothing – nothing happened. We’ve never had that mission. Emilia is not on her knees in front of me, trembling.

Fuck, how can she look at me like this?

How can a guilty person have these eyes?

Today… didn’t happen.

Or- if it happened… if this nightmare is real… I want someone to tell me that Emilia hasn’t done anything. I want to hug and kiss her, and I want to get on my knees and apologise for slapping her, and I want her to be mad at me for a while, and then to make up, and kiss, and make love, and be just like we’ve always been.

But I can’t do either of these things.

This is not a nightmare.

This has been a real day, and Emilia’s done all the things I prayed were false… and Felix and Hyo are living proof of that.

“How could you betray them?! How could you betray me, hm?!”

“I never-”

I don’t want to kill her.

I can’t.

And I also don’t want to forgive her.

I can’t.

So, I will do something else. I will threaten her, I will make sure she runs far and stays away, because she can’t be here any longer. I can’t bear it.

I’m not… strong enough.

“You look so pathetic. And you are worthless. It wouldn’t even be fun killing you at this point.” I force harsh words out of my throat, and I bend down, grabbing a handful of her hair, forcing her to look at me.

It hurts.

“I’m gonna give you some time to pull yourself together… and when your world’s sweetest, I’ll hunt you down with everything I have. You hear me? This shall be fun. We can even put your pretty head on display somewhere in the garden when the time comes, why not? That’s what rats deserve.”

I watch her, and wait for her to say something, anything.

But she doesn’t.

“Not gonna say anything, doll? Then, get the fuck out of my house already, will you? You fucking traitor.” I push her away and turn around, wiping my hands with some discarded napkins from the table.

Keep your composure.

Keep your composure.

Keep your composure.

I can’t look at her anymore, because if I do, I might just take it all back.

I need to be strong. I need to be the leader Stray Kids deserves.

My knees are trembling so bad, I don’t think I can be in this room any longer. I signal Hyo to follow me, and we head towards the door together. I refuse to look back, and I try to ignore Emilia’s cries.

Keep your composure.

Don’t look back.

Keep your composure.

~

Jeongin has changed.

He looks like he aged 10 years in just under a week, and he absolutely loathes me.

I don’t blame him. I hate myself just as much, if not more.

He believes Emilia to be innocent, and he doesn’t hesitate to voice that out anytime he sees me. But… How can that be? How could she be innocent in all of this? Who shot Hyo and Felix, if Emilia is innocent?

No… don’t think about this.

It’s Emilia’s fault for betraying me.

I shake my head and look at Felix, trying to focus on him, otherwise this tension is going to end up breaking me. He is still asleep.

Keep your composure.

“God, Lix, how much longer are you going to sleep?!”

I sigh and let my head fall on the back of the armchair, letting the world go black.

~

Huh?

I hastily wake up from my slumber as a raspy cough interrupts my dreamless sleep.

“Felix?!” I get up immediately, grabbing Felix’ hand.

“Chris…” He takes his other hand and places it on his chest. I wonder how much it hurts… “Fuck.”

“I’m so glad you’re awake, brother.”

“How much was I out for?”

“A little bit under a week. We weren’t sure if you were gonna make it.”

“And Emilia?” He asks, and I freeze. “Where is she, is she okay?”

Why?

Why is he saying her name?

No…

Was Jeongin… right?

“Why… would you ask about her…?”

“She was… fuck, this hurts… she was stabbed… Hyo turned on her…”

“Felix… What are you saying…? Didn’t she shoot you?”

“What?!” Felix tries to sit up, but the pain in his chest must be too great, for he immediately lays back down and covers his chest again with his palm with a groan. “No… it was Hyo… damn, she got a number on us. I remember opening that door and Emilia bleeding badly… then Hyo’s weapon pointed at me… I just remember… hearing two shots…”

“No… this can’t be… it was Shade… she shot you…”

I shake my head in denial.

No…

No way…

No…

Was it Hyo’s scheme all this time?

But why?

Why?

Why didn’t I pay more attention?

“No, hyung… Emilia would never… fuck, she was hurt so badly, I was so scared seeing Hyo… She is frightening when she wants to kill someone.”

“But… it makes no sense… Please tell me you’re misremembering, Lix… please.” I cry, my voice hoarse.

No.

This can’t be happening.

I couldn’t have fucked up so badly, could I?

I close my eyes shut and remember my dad’s advice, and I feel myself wanting to scream. I want to break something, to grab a blade and slit my wrists, to somehow reverse time and not be so naïve…

But I can’t.

Is there any way to make this better? To fix things?

Is there?

“Chan…?” Felix asks. He seems concerned. “What did you do…?”

“Hyo… is in the kitchen…” I reply, and Felix’ gaze darkens.

“And Emi…?”

I look at Felix and the words are stuck in my throat.

I have no idea where she is.

Why did I turn her away?

Why didn’t I believe her?

I didn’t even give her a chance to explain herself.

I didn’t-

“Chan… where is Emilia?”

It’s my fault.

Fuck, it’s all my fault.

“Felix… I… I fucked up.” I confess, tears spilling out of my eyes uncontrollably. “I thought she- I thought she shot you, so I…”

Felix squeezes my hand and waits for me to stop crying. It takes a while, but I finally manage to calm myself down enough.

“What… will you do about it, hyung…?”

I force a smile and pat his leg two times, standing up, as it suddenly becomes clear.

I know exactly what I must do.

I go in the kitchen and look at the fucking traitor. She’s just eating, like she hasn’t ruined my whole life in a span of 2 weeks.

Did she ruin my life?

Or did I just ruin it myself?

Of course, I’m aware she’s not the only guilty one. It’s just easier to blame someone else.

It’s Hyo’s fault.

It’s not.

I know it’s not.

It’s my fault for believing her.

It’s my fault.

I am to blame as much as her, for not even listening to Emilia’s side of the story.

But I will make things right.

Like they should’ve been in the first place.

“Channie, how’s Lix?” She smiles.

How can you show me that smile, Hyo?

After what you’ve done to me… how can you be so cruel?

Fake.

It was all fake.

“Chan, is everything alright…?”

No, Hyo. But it will be.

I pick up her revolver from the table, and surprise surprise, there are only 3 bullets out of 6 in it.

Tsk. You were so confident you didn’t even bother reloading it.

How little did you think of me, Hyo?

I want to laugh.

“Felix woke up.”

“Wh… what did you say?”

“It’s funny, really.”

“What’s funny, Hyung?” Jisung asks.

I didn’t even notice he was in the room.

Oh, Jeongin is here too.

Whatever.

It doesn’t matter.

“You guys all know how my dad was betrayed by the one partner he trusted the most… I can’t believe… I got myself tricked the same exact way.”

“Channie, whatever Felix said…”

Shut the fuck up.

Shut up, Hyo.

I open fire, and I shoot her three times.

One for shooting Felix, one for fooling me, and one… for Emilia.

I look at Hyo’s lifeless body and my heart has never throbbed so much before. In a span of just two weeks, I lost the love of my life, I lost my sister and I almost lost my best friend.

How could I be so stupid?

“God, what did I do?!” I let out.

Emilia… she will come back, right?

“She tried to tell you…” Jeongin says, but I barely hear him, because I notice something new. Blood.

There’s dried blood on the wall. A lot of it.

Felix said that she was badly hurt. Is this blood … hers?

No… it can’t be…

“No… No, no no! Where is this blood from?!”

Why isn’t anyone saying anything?

Fuck.

Fuck!!!

Is this Emilia’s blood?!

No…

No way…

“Jeongin! Answer me! Where is this blood from?”

He still stays silent.

“That’s… no… fuck… she was hurt and I… What did I do?!”

I don’t even notice how hard I’m crying, nor do I care. I just stand up and take it out on the poor wall. I hit it over and over and over and over again, until I can’t feel my knuckles anymore. I actually can’t even feel anything besides this crippling pain in my chest, suffocating me.

What did I do?

What did I do?

FUCK!

What did I do?!

“Please… Jeongin… you know where she is, don’t you? You… you helped her, right? That’s where you’ve been leaving these past days…” I plead with him, hoping that I’m right at least with this thing. Minho told me something, hinting that it’s very likely Jeongin has been taking care of Emilia, but…

“You knew?” I.N avoids my gaze. “And didn’t say anything…?”

Yes! Okay! She’s alive! Good!

I can make things better.

I can fix this.

I can fix us!

I can… I can change everything.

Just wait, Emilia! I will come for you, and I will make it all just like it was.

“Where is she?”

“She… she didn’t make it, Hyung.”

… what?

No… this can’t be…

Did I hear right…?

No.

He’s lying.

He must be lying.

I’m angry again.

“Don’t lie to me, goddammit!”

“I helped her! But she… fuck. I couldn’t save her!”

“No… no, this can’t be. NO!” I scream and scream, but no matter how loud I do it, it won’t change anything.

I can’t change shit.

I ruined everything, and I can’t make it better.

She’s dead.

She’s dead.

“Why… did she die?” I summon up all the force left in my body to ask this.

She’s dead.

Because of me.

“… Stab wound…”

“Her body… where… where is it?”

“I buried her… before coming here…”

“This… can’t be… Jeongin, please. Please tell me you’re lying. Please…”

“We can go to her grave, Chan…”

“But…” I shake my head. I still don’t want to believe it. “ You’re… you’re lying, right? Tell me you’re lying…”

“I’m really sorry.” He shakes his head, and suddenly, everything around me seems to disappear. It dissolves into nothing. It’s blurred. There’s a loud ring in my ears.

It hurts.

Emilia is dead.

And I helped kill her.

~

Jeongin decides to treat my wounds first, so he bandages my knuckles tightly. They don’t hurt. I can’t feel them. I can’t feel anything anymore despite a slight sting in my chest.

We drive for a little while and he brings me to a hill. An improvised grave overlooks the fields below, and the ground looks freshly dug.

I don’t want to believe that the love of my life is laying down there, a few metres deep in the cold ground, by herself.

I failed you, Emilia.

It’s all my fault.

It’s surreal. I really can’t believe she’s actually there. I want to dig the hole again, just to check, but of course, I can’t do that and disrespect Emilia once again.

After all, I didn’t respect her enough when she was alive, so I have no right to do anything and disturb her dead body too.

I try to choke back a sob but fail miserably as I fall to my knees and scream and shout and cry so hard, until my voice is completely gone, and no tears are falling anymore.

I want to crawl in Emilia’s grave and bury myself next to her and simply disappear. I would never get up from the ground. I don’t deserve to keep on living after what I’ve done to the love of my life.

However, Jeongin doesn’t let me give up. He helps me up and forces me back to the car, and the whole drive back is a blur.

Everything is a blur.

I don’t understand anything anymore.

I just want to forget.

The pain in my heart is way too great to bear, to the point where it’s simply killing me.

Unless I get rid of these feelings, I won’t be able to keep going.

I have to… let it all go.

I have to grow numb to protect myself. And… I have to protect everyone around me, to prevent a tragedy like this from happening again.

~

~

Days are all blurred into each other. A horrible routine under grey skies between the cold walls of what was once a happy place.

My heart’s been missing for so long, nothing hurts any longer.

Nothing feels any different, no matter what I do.

Even if I’m spending time with Stray Kids, which I used to enjoy so much; even if I’m killing somebody; hell, even if I hurt myself, forcing a blade into my skin over and over again to draw blood, I just don’t feel anything anymore.

There is no more pain.

There is nothing, nothing inside of me anymore.

Is this the consequence of growing completely numb?

Work, work, work, work, work, work, work.

That’s all I seem to be doing lately.

I just work.

I can’t stop working, because if I dare to stop, my mind gets empty enough to leave room for thoughts I am not prepared to face.

Will I ever be prepared?

Nothing is ever changing.

Nothing.

No matter how much time passes.

Everything in me died already, so… what is the point in doing anything?

What is the point?

Nothing is changing.

I’ve been sucked into a black hole and I just

can’t

get

out

---

Chapter 2

[lythea-creation]

Caught on Camera - Shams x fem reader (Chapter 8)

Chapter 1

Previous Chapter

warnings: none

word count: 1.186

----------------

When I woke up in the morning I immediately noticed that the space next to me was empty. Apparently Shams had already left.

I was torn between the urge to look for her and the urge to take a shower first. Considering how dirty I was feeling I decided for a shower and got dressed in some of Shams' clothes, hoping that she would not be mad. I was not too eager to get back in uniform.

When I left her room and moved upstairs I could already hear some chatting and laughing, followed by a delicious smell.

Shams and Omar where sitting at the kitchen table while an unfamiliar woman, most likely their mom, was making breakfast.

Shams flashed me a smile as soon as she saw me, leading her brother to raise an eyebrow.

“I didn't know you could smile”, he teased her, a big grin planted on his face.

“Oh, shut up!”, she demanded and slapped his shoulder.

“Good morning, (f/n). Shams already told me that you're here. I'm Nayan. Nice to have you here”, she greeted me.

“Thanks”, I replied, suddenly feeling shy.

It should not be a big deal. After all she was just a mom of a friend. But after last night Shams' and my relationship was somehow feeling more intimate than that of a casual friend.

“I already thought you'd miss breakfast”, Shams proposed. “Didn't wanna wake you up though.”

I sat down next to her as Omar was sitting across from her, while sending her a small smile as a reply.

“Oh, by the way, (f/n). Ali told me that he wanted to message you, but that he didn't have your number. Do you mind?”, Omar wondered.

For a second Shams' face fell, but she quickly hid it again. Maybe I had just imagined it.

“Nah. I don't have insta or tiktok. But Shams can give you my number. Although you can tell him right away that I'm not interested in any more than friendship”, I declared.

“Alright. I'll tell him”, he assured me.

“So what are you all up to today?”, Nayan inquired as she placed all the food on the table.

“This looks delicious. Thank you”, I proclaimed.

“It's nothing really”, she brushed it off.

I could not even remember the last time my mom had made breakfast for me. So it kinda was a big deal.

“I'm gonna study and later meet up with the guys”, Omar announced while digging into breakfast.

“Do you wanna hang out today?”, Shams asked me.

“Sure. I'll text my mom, if you can get me a charger. My phone died on me”, I pointed out.

We all continued talking during breakfast and afterwards cleaned everything up together. To my surprise I enjoyed doing chores for once. It was a whole different thing when you were spending time together while doing it.

“So what do you wanna do?”, Shams questioned back in her room.

My phone was already charging by now.

“Let's finish the school project first. So we won't have to think about that anymore. Then we can do something fun”, I suggested.

Knowing that we would hang out after finishing was a great motivator for me, leading to seemingly endless concentration.

After one more hour we were finally done with the project, putting everything away contently.

“I'm beat”, Shams declared. “How about some video games?”

“Oh yeah”, I agreed excited. “What do you have?”

We settled on a car racing game. Shams was incredibly good at it.

“Finished”, she announced once again.

“How do you do that so fast?”, I complained.

“Not that hard”, she claimed, a teasing grin on her face.

I should have kept my eyes on the road because I ended up crashing my car, thanks to looking at her.

“You should probably practice some more though”, she suggested, her voice dripping with amusement.

“Yeah, I get it! I'm just a hopeless case”, I half-joked.

“How about some other game then?”, Shams questioned.

But no matter how many games we tried, Shams always won. No matter how hard I tried and how relaxed she appeared.

“So what is it with you and Ali?”, Shams asked casually.

“We just talked at Omar's party. That's all”, I brushed it off. “Why?”

“Just curious”, she claimed.

Suddenly my phone started ringing, ripping me out of the flow of the game. Of course it had to be now out of all times when I was finally getting the upper hand for once.

I put my controller aside and hurried over to my phone to accept the call.

“Hey, mom”, I greeted her.

“Hey, sorry to bother you, (f/n). But could you come home and help me with the garden, please? Tasmana is on vacation, remember? And you know I always ruin the garden. It already looks horrendous. It can't wait any longer”, she ranted.

“Okay, mom. Calm down. It's alright. Can you pick me up though?”, I requested.

“Of course! I'll be right there”, she declared and hung up.

I sighed. “I gotta head out”, I enlightened Shams.

Her smile quickly fell. “Oh, okay.”

“I'll bring your clothes to school if that's alright”, I suggested, already grabbing my backpack.

“Sure. I'll accompany you to the door”, she remarked.

I said goodbye to Nayan on the way out. Omar was probably in his room as I did not see him anywhere around.

Shams followed me outside, waiting with me for my mom.

“Shams”, I called out her name, taking a deep breath to gather my courage. “Thank you for last night. You know … comforting me like that. Nobody's ever done that and you were there for me so many times already. I still feel like a jerk for treating you so badly before. You really deserve better.”

Her dark eyes met mine. “I didn't do that much. And you changed and apologized. There's nothing more you can do. So apology accepted”, she noted.

As none of us was breaking eye-contact, we were simply staring at each other.

The space between us was shrinking as my heart was bumping against my chest.

The vibration in my pocked startled me so much that I literally jumped backwards, almost falling over in the process.

“I'm here. Are you coming out?”, my mom wondered.

She could not see us because the gate was closed.

“On my way”, I promised and hung up again.

“See you at school then”, Shams stated.

I nodded and sent her a quick smile followed by a short “bye” before heading to the car.

I had not imagined the tension between us, right?

“Hey”, my mom greeted me once again. “Are you okay? Your face is really red. Are you getting a fever?”

“I'm fine”, I mumbled, my head full of questions.

-------------------

Last Chapter

Finally the next chapter! I hope it was worth the wait. Just so you know, your messages are the reason I'm posting this already. If you hadn't texted me, the chapter wouldn't be ready rn. So if you like to read something, writing comments, messages and asks is the best way to get it asap. And I'm always happy when you tell me that you enjoy my stories.

Tag List: @sunwoniie

[identitheoret]

My Thoughts on the Story/Lore of “Ashes of Memory: Part 1”

(I might make this into a video if I have time btw)

Hey guys, IdentiTheoret here! :)

I’m not really sure what else I need to say here before I just jump right into my thoughts on Ashes of Memory. I think this Tumblr thing will actually work super well with what I’m aiming for here, but I’m still kinda new to it, so if you guys have any tips for me there I’d love to hear them. And my DM’s are also completely open, so you guys can ask me directly about literally anything you like or need help figuring out, lore related or whatever else you wanna talk about or say to me.

Anyways I guess I’ll just get right on into my thoughts now.

First of all, I had like no idea they were going this hog wild with changing up everything in terms of how the system works. I wasn’t keeping up a whole lot with the update prior outside of the one major teaser, so when I hopped on after maintenance and saw everything they changed I was kinda stunned.

I won’t be going with any particular order of events, rather I’ll try to go through each particular topic with all the details in mind from the beginning to end of Chapter 1.

Alice DeRoss (Reporter)

When I first saw her in the teaser I was like “Eh, not sure how to feel about her, it’s a little jarring seeing her like this.” And I didn’t even look back over it again to analyze because of the stuff I mentioned in my update video that was draining my energy. Although even then, I thought the idea of following adult Alice was absolutely dope.

But then I played the new story and got an actual good look and feel for this version of Alice and—OH MY GOD SHE IS SO FREAKING PRETTY LIKE AAAAAAH I CAN’T 😳🫠

Seriously they did such a good job with these new designs. And they kinda had to because they were gonna have far more normal designs outside of just Orpheus. I’m not going to go into any detail about my opinions there though, I’ll save that for a separate post soon after this one. I’m just looking at the story and lore right now.

So when it comes to everything leading up to her visiting the manor, they don’t really show off anything too odd. After her separation from Orpheus when they were kids, Alice suffered great social trauma/isolation, which we knew a bit about already with certain letters. But what we didn’t get to see was what happened after she left the orphanage. I was assuming maybe her trauma was going to mess her up in the long term, and if it didn’t I assumed she was going to lose her memories entirely or something because it seemed like things were just that intense during her time in the orphanage. But no, she has a fairly decent memory of her past by the looks of it. However, just like Orpheus in Time of Reunion, we are told she has little memory of the actual events of the manor tragedy, and in general some of her memories are a bit hazy. Not to mention the fact that she doesn’t find anything to be odd about Orpheus when she meets him in the manor.

Yeah, she hadn’t seen him since they were super young, but as we’ve seen before, the nickname of “Orpheus,” was a major detail of the two’s past friendship, because it represented their bonding experiences of making up stories and playing characters. The Orpheus nickname catching on and eventually being the name young Alice used for him exclusively was meant to show how close they were. But by the looks of it, she doesn’t remember the nickname at all.

And sure, it doesn’t mean she should immediately be like “ 😱 Oh mah gah that’s the same name it must be him ☝️🤓 .” However, this detail doesn’t even strike her as odd in any way. This could just be nothing, and she just decided to pay no mind to it, but when it comes to Identity V writing, these things are usually pointed out afterwards at the very least with a little “Huh, [Insert Minor Detail] is pretty odd” sorta thing. It happens a lot.

Outside of that, there’s not a whole lot she’s gotten involved in yet. I mean, it is only Chapter 1, so it makes sense. BUT, I do still have one thing to mention about her.

After you complete Chapter 1, you’re given the S-Tier Costume “Moment of Leisure.” And well, I mean, just look at it.

(Yes I am aware of the fact that one is a dress and the other is sleepwear but like, c’mon)

It’s possible that both the adult and child characters we always see together are probably BOTH meant to be Alice. There was really no reason for them to include this costume otherwise. Although, we do see in both the cinematics and in summaries by Orpheus that the older woman was a mother to the girl, and that she died a “horrific death.” Of course, the mother thing would make sense to conclude from Orpheus’s perspective so we can pretty much ignore that, but what about the death and it’s importance to the “Little Girl” after that? How would that fit into any of this?

Well, I have somewhat of an idea to propose for that, and for quick context I need to bring up two simple details: First, the character lineup was likely intentionally different from what we were expecting with Melly/Norton to draw attention to how the timeline’s gonna work out, since we know the Melly/Norton/Orpheus game was the last one Orpheus participated in before the amnesia and all that. And second, most of Alice’s personality and character in general is centered around her persistence and vigilance, literally stating word by word that in the face of her past traumas and mysteries, she needed to “Face it, and it’ll all be over.” This wording about it being “over” also specifically draws attention to the idea of moving on after facing the issue instead of just facing it persistently and learning to live with it or something like that.

So, with that all in mind, this is my early theory for how I think this is all gonna go. Either:

Alice will find the answers she needs to understand the missing bits of her past so she can come to terms with it, and she moves on while Orpheus stays in his ways. And maybe after Alice finds out who Orpheus really is, and she realizes he is actively choosing not to face his own traumas and is beyond persuasion, she escapes the manor and leaves him behind because she simply has to move on. The depictions, both written and seen, of her “horrible death” would be based in Orpheus’s (subjective, rather than objective) view of her facing her issues head on and suffering through the worst of it before she finally is able to overcome her sorrow. To her, she would be getting through the worst of it to finally rid herself of the prolonged pain she’s felt for so long. But to Orpheus, that short phase of pain needed to overcome his trauma seemed far too horrible of a thing to be worth suffering through. Thematically speaking, this would definitely make sense (and because the depictions of the “mother” and girl are clearly not literal or direct about their meaning at face value). All the depictions of young Alice trying to guide Orpheus are things he put into his own head from a deep regret for not listening to her and a desire to have her take the lead for him once more because he doesn’t feel like he can rely on himself to change. But these feelings are still hidden under his repetitive denial, and that’s why it’s something he doesn’t know he’s aware of yet.

Alice dies during the game, either because she wants to try and save Orpheus from himself and fails, and/or because Orpheus starts to believe he can do it but hesitates and gets her killed in the process. This would make sense because most of the themes in Orpheus’s story center around his inability to stay firm in what he needs to do with his trauma, and to not look back with doubt based on what he’s done before. And this would also tie perfectly to the Orpheus myth of him turning to Eurydice with doubt and dooming her to the Underworld, leading him to a life of sorrow and regret in the land of the living. Since this is, well, Identity V, I am pretty certain that this aspect of the myth is intentionally tied into Orpheus’s theme of traumatic repetition and him constantly choosing not to look forwards. This persists in most of the elements of his story, especially with the major details such as the “Don’t Look Back” line that comes up a whole lot when you think about it. So assuming that to be the case, and also assuming that Alice dies, we can conclude that she becomes a spirit in the form of her past younger self as she embodies that wholly innocent part of her life, and maybe just to make herself easier to recognize to Orpheus I guess…? The reason why she’d stay in the form of a child is harder to explain here than it is in the other point. It’d make sense why the child version would be there when accompanied by the older version because it was so long after Orpheus saw Alice that he separates his view of her into his memories of what he thought she was like and what she is now in front of him. That also explains why he tries to see her in the exact same dress as the younger version of her, because at the core the two versions are still the same person.

Those are just my initial thoughts at the moment. I may build onto these conclusions more later on after giving it more thought or when we see more of the next chapter. I guess I’ll leave my thoughts there for now though and move on.

“Orpheus” DeRoss (Novelist)

Well, there’s not much to say for him really. Same’s gonna go for the other two as well for the most part because of how early we are into this, but I do want to point out the way he interacts with everyone. It sometimes may give off a vibe like he knows way more than he lets on, but I don’t think that’s the case. I think the depiction here is still accurate/still will be accurate going forward with the explanation given in Time of Reunion about him having his memory wiped over and over. I don’t think he is actually aware of anything behind the manor in this state. The way he pushes certain details and questions towards others, like the point about betrayal directed at Melly about her insects, and the other point about Mary’s French heritage with Fredrick, seem to just be derived from his intrigue for drama stemming from his interest in writing. He likes a good mystery and finding little things out. We even see him do this with Alice herself in the cutscene after Chapter 1, where he asks her to play the piano for him in exchange for some information on his new book. Besides that, not much needs to be said here.

Fredrick Kreiburg (Composer)

Okay, imma just be real here, I am COMPLETELY lost when it comes to this guy. I was really confused when it was revealed that he was going to be one of the four main characters of this thing, because the guys literally just came out not that long before and we didn’t even get like any buildup for him in the lore before his release. And when it comes to his connections to the racecourse with Mary, like yeah I’m completely clueless. But that actually has nothing to do with the Mary thing though, because I was well aware from the start that there was the theory that Mary wasn’t the actual Mary Antoinette but rather a noblewoman of some sort (based on bday letters if you’re confused). And I knew it was probably true, and was most likely gonna be important later on, but I still was just like “Nah I don’t care right now I’ll just wait on that one.” And now it’s already introduced but I’m still confused about like, why?

I will say one thing though, all the details surrounding that weird Mary subplot, such as the “was it a suicide or a murder?” mystery that’s almost treated like a legend, and the way the death is presented generally, and how the backlash against the racecourse afterwards is completely directed towards one man in particular, and how everyone just kinda goes like “🤷‍♀️🤷‍♂️ Uh idek why she did that 🤷🤷‍♂️,” it all gives off MAJOR Atropos Ropes vibes and it’s definitely intentional. Not sure how to feel about that just yet, but that’s mostly because of my big lack of understanding about anything Mary/Kreiburg related.

Not only that, but look at the way they describe the legend of the past owners of the manor and the mysterious death of the male owner’s female lover before the closure of the course and selling of their manor before some seemingly random dude who is clearly a descendant (Fredrick) suddenly shows up upon invitation from the new owners, and he is is heavily associated with a certain art expression and deals with social pressures.

Like, dude. That’s literally the plot of Lone Moon from T&I. The husband is the Knight, Mary is the princess, and Fredrick is Narcissus.

(+ We have already gotten thematic connections between Lone Moon and Atropos Ropes in terms of the themes of repetition and supposed fate, but we also have literal connections through the Amethyst Duchess, linking Narcissus to Bella (aka, you know, Mary)).

And also, I think the way they use the racecourse specifically of all things leads me to believe that there must be a connection to COA 4. And no, it has nothing to do with the horse imagery in that story, because that was directly linked to Cavalier and his Don Quixote inspirations (but if you wanna get refreshed on that go watch my COA Lore vid). The reason why they did horses here and not cars is simply because, well, rich people shit.

The thing that really makes me certain about this, outside of the obvious specificity, is once again that reoccurring theme of repetition and mistakes from those who came before. It’s present in Atropos Ropes, it’s present in Lone Moon, and it’s definitely present in COA 4, because that story is entirely based around that concept. And all of these have strong connections to either the manor’s history or the DeRoss family, which I highly doubt is a coincidence based on the theories about the DeRosses I’ve been making for the past while.

Melly Plinius (Entomologist)

Not much to say about her either. She’s got that same weird personality that we’d expect from her, and talks about the betrayal thing in a very weird way with connecting it to bugs. But the most important thing I can really point out so far about her is how she has little to no importance of any kind to the events going on regarding the manor and the Kreiburg racetrack. I think this has something to do with what the devs want us to notice about how this timeline works, since Norton hasn’t appeared yet. So I’m guessing Fredrick either dies or just leaves and is replaced by Norton sometime in the story. Knowing how weird some of the other diary stories were written, I’m sure Fredrick just gets like a little bit deep into how he may be involved with the racetrack and the Baron as a result of that, gets uncomfortable and goes like “Nah no thanks” and just kinda bails. I’m not even kidding, I could see that happening tbh.

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Well, anyways, that’s all I have to say for now. Like I said before, I’m already planning another post sometime soon, and I’m also thinking about making this post into an actual video as well, but I’m not sure which will come first. Thanks for reading, I’ll see you guys again soon💖💖💖

[honorthysalad]

Alright gotta pick my jaw off the floor after that last chapter (hehe). Just gonna lay out a few thoughts and ideas.

right so my prediction is Tanaka’s gonna take ‘Hikaru’s head and try to walk off. He’s gonna be testing A) if ‘Hikaru’ can survive/heal from this B) how to stop ‘Hikaru’ from healing to make him easier to remove. I’m assuming that as a brain snatcher, ‘Hikaru’ resides mostly in the head so the rest of his body is probably just gonna lay there.

so then three ways I can see that going:

Number 1: Yoshiki tries to haggle with Tanaka. Maybe he agrees to provide information on the Brainsnatcher or trades the piece of ‘Hikaru’s insides in return to get ‘Hikaru’ back. Or he asks to go with them, not even to get ‘Hikaru’ back. He just wants to stay by ‘Hikaru’s side.

Number 2: Tanaka drops the sword as he goes to leave and Yoshiki picks it up, threatening to fight him. He’s not going to try to kill Tanaka; he just can’t let him take ‘Hikaru’. Uh but it’s Yoshiki so he pussies out/gets his ass kicked, and Tanaka leaves anyway.

Number 3: idk maybe ‘Hikaru’ tries to spider crawls away like that scene from the Thing. I think that’d be pretty funny to watch.

They’ve spent most of vol4 going ‘well we made a promise (with a friendship bracelet to prove it) and we’re gonna stick together no matter what’ so I think it’s only natural for vol 5 to put that to the test. We’ve already seen that ‘Hikaru’ can’t protect Yoshiki. Can Yoshiki protect ‘Hikaru’? (The answer is probably also no.)

Anyway I don’t think Tanaka is just gonna be like ‘oh yes please reattach and be at assumedly full strength to kill me’. He’s got some plan. I don’t really know how this ghost stuff works, but Tanaka does so Imma trust he can absolutely fuck up ‘Hikaru’.

I mean he could just cut off ‘Hikaru’s head, answer absolutely zero questions, and then walk away and that would be equally badass but I kind of doubt it because it would make the whole scene pointless. We already know Tanaka knows, and we already know ‘Hikaru’ is immortal. This has gotta bring up some new information.

other non head related predictions for vol5:

’Hikaru’ having a scar from being not quite powerful enough to heal completely. Think this would be a nice contrast to the scars spirits usually leave on others and makes him feel more human.

Yoshiki and ‘Hikaru’ returning to where Hikaru died to learn more about the ritual Hikaru was doing.

‘Hikaru’s grandpa dies because old people aren’t allowed to exist in hgsn.

Maki dies hopefully sometime soon. I’ve been thinking this since vol2 so idk if it’ll happen but he just feels like a character who will die. (I’ve got like an idea for how it’d happen but with the tone of this chapter in mind it’s pretty unlikely).

a conversation with Hikaru’s mom. please god talk to her Yoshiki please.

Some sort of discussion on the vision Yoshiki had back in vol2 because that happened and he proceeded to literally never think about it once afterwards (I’m pretty sure at least… idk maybe he did in vol3 I still don’t remember what happened in that one).

‘Hikaru’s falls off the mountain after seeing the titty tree.

overall thoughts on vol4: it was good. Lot of talking. Especially ghost talking which my brain kinda skims over (which probably doesn’t help my comprehension… idk ghosts are my least favorite part of this series). I liked seeing Hikaru and Yoshiki’s hideout. Any scene with Yoshiki and Hikaru is great tho. The further use of Yoshiki in the role of mother by having him wash ‘Hikaru’s clothes, highlighting just how childish ‘Hikaru’ is in comparison, and even just when the angle shifts to make ‘Hikaru’ smaller and Yoshiki taller. Idk this mother thing is constantly on my mind, especially because Yoshiki named ‘Hikaru’. That day when he embraced him, he gave ‘Hikaru’ a new name, spelled differently and everything, and that’s how he’s referred to from then on. (Idk ‘Hikaru’ if calls himself by that name, I can’t think of any examples at least, but I still think it’s pretty powerful.)

Edit: throwing this on here too