#i hated the feeling of change. i hated it. i still dont rly like it.
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Ok I think I'm finally ready to watch dragons rising
#have been delaying it for so long#its jsut.. sicndujdjff.#i hated the feeling of change. i hated it. i still dont rly like it.#i really couldnt give an honest syit abt the new characters.#i never was really obsessed w lloyd#the amount of change just stressed me out#i didnt want to let go off my memories of Ninjago#idfk#its stupid
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y'all ever think abt how it was julie having the affair and it is even said multiple times that she was the one who left him, yet wilson was still the one who left their home and moved in with house. like. he couldn't bear to stay in their home alone. he immediately ran to house and stayed on his couch for weeks. suffered through his pranks and his laziness and his manipulation. telling him he wants him gone while sabotaging his attempts to leave. and he only left once he got a girlfriend again.
#chyanne speaks#house md#hilson#hate crimes md#gregory house#james wilson#i think his inability to be alone is such an interesting quality of his that isnt touched on enough#like yes we all haha at his long string of unsuccessful relationships but we dont talk abt it all stemming from his inability to be alone#his first wife leaves him and then he remarried quickly#he cheats on the second wife and remarries quickly#the third wife cheats on him and leaves him and he immediately moves in with house#and then starts dating a patient and immediately moves in with her#but!!! then he moves into the hotel and is alone for like almost a year! and honestly he NEEDED IT#bc GROWTH happened in that year and he meets someone who doesn't fit his M.O. who breaks away from the mold#although he does immediately move in with her too but still. amber was different. she was the step in the right direction#and then she dies.#and then wilson throws himself into the left field. everything needs to change. he's spent so long fearing being alone.#so he tries to leave so he is completely and totally alone without house to fall back on#but house needs him. he needs him too much. they need each other too much.#and he falls back to house again. and he's content that way. he's always the most content when he's with house. always feels the least alone#and then sam comes back into his life and ruins e v e r y t h i n g#he falls right back onto those old patterns. kicks house out and moves her in. and then what happens??? of course??? she leaves him. again.#and then he's alone again and it hurts. he gets a cat that we only hear about twice and then never gets brought up again#but wilson has his kitty. he has house. he's not alone. he can be content.#and then house fucks everything up. he goes to prison. wilson is alone again.#im honestly SHOCKED that wilson didnt remarry in that year they were apart but he was rly trying to change!#he was working on himself and trying to make changed he thought would be good for him#and then house comes back. and house won't LET wilson be alone. he wont leave him alone.#and it's exactly what wilson has been yearning for since the day he drove that car into cuddys house#and in the end. as long as he had house that was all that mattered. as long as he had house he wasn't alone.
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my desire to draw the cast in an increasingly different way than theyre designed in canon because its fun to play around vs my desperate desire to be as canon compliant as possible
#jax is the most extreme ive gotten and i cant tell if i want to push it further. w any of them#i mean i could just experiment sometimes and draw them how i want to draw them in a given moment#cus tbh consistency is irrelevant..#but also i get finicky . i looove when other ppl play around but whenever i try to#i get hung up on the fact that i dont actually know what the end goal is for the design and scared of changing something#in a way that will bother me. and then i just draw them how i always draw them#i get worried abt accidentally imposing rules upon myself so much that i impose more arbitrary rules on myself#but i wanna play around...#i also LIKE to test the limits of a characters already existing character design#and get worried that ill change smth or change smth too much that prevents me from doing that. urggg#rn im rly just unsatisfied w how i draw pomni in particular. idk why but it just feels like smths missing...#i mean its not like i hate it and i still like drawing her. but i need to change smth and i just cant place what...#anyway. whatever . shoots a psychic beam
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Sometimes I just look at Isabeau and just know that if isat came out and I got into it when I was like 16 he would be my favorite character and I would've gone absolutely buck wild over this man and feel like he was laser targeting me. But alas Odile has a grip of steel on me rn due to her virtue of being a middle aged woman
#rat rambles#stars posting#I feel like the biggest change in my taste in characters as the years have gone by is Im now far more biased towards old ppl lol#although tbf I was also the one person in 2016 who actually liked asgore so maybe Ive always liked parhetic old ppl#but yeah the reason isa is past me bait is because hes an exploration and subversion of the sort of tropes I Hated as a kid#and I still dont like them so isa still appeals to me its just not as much as he would have to a younger me#I do genuinely love all the party very dearly tho theyre all soooo good#I think my favorite part of isabeau is how like. of everyone we get to see the least facets of him but like in a very good way#this is a man who hides and bottles shit hes so fun to rotate#his self image is so carefully controlled compared to everyone else which makes him an incredibly interesting character to analyze#and I love that despite him seeming like the most emotionally stable person here on the surface he still clearly has like. hashtag issues.#like he's in that beautiful zone where its so so fun imagining what it would look like to truly break him#<- normal things that normal ppl say. like me.#I may have my very light beef with alt looping aus as a concept but hes probably the most interesting alternate looper to me#also my light beef exclusively relates to king quest stuff which is why Im a big fan of duo looper aus with sif#but honestly. isa might be the only one that I genuinely think works better as a solo looper even with taking king quest into account#although bonnie comes close. I <3 looper bonnie I <3 seeing fictional children go through the horrors#I think theres a lot of fun to be had with any alt looper au tho I just am a huge king quest fan so I like it when my favorite elements of#it dont have to be handwaved#but yeah the real question is how would younger me feel about mirabelle#because on the one hand: acearo character#but on the other hand: I have always been a little hater abt romance so idk if younger me would rly be able to follow her character well#I wasnt exactly good at character analysis back then lol#except for the instances in which I was but I dont have that sort of faith in my younger self#yknow Im thinking abt my history of favorite characters now and I think me being one of few 2016 alphys enjoyers might have been a prophecy#she was my quote unquote third favorite but in reality she was second#I think she chara and peridot su teamed up to define my taste in fictional characters for the next several years#and somehow that lead to olivia becoming one of my favorite fictional characters of all time#I say somehow as if that isnt a very natural conclusion
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stop seeing the 3d as something greater than you ☆

facts about the 3d
1. its forever a reflection of imagination/self, its a follower
you change self -> the 3d changes too because thats the law (thats how powerful you are). when you change yourself all the 3d can do is follow. it always expresses self. the 3d will always copy and follow self, it will always copy who you are being in imagination (your identity)
2. its forever neutral
the 3d has no original meaning bc you always assign everything meaning based on your state/perspectives
3. its forever changeable
since you are the operant power, you always have full control. the shit you see now is temporary. it always changes bc you are always changing states. dont feel discouraged when you havent seen any 3d change bc you know that it will change once you truly change self. nothing can possibly be permanent in the 3d so worrying about if "circumstances" will be there forever is useless. you have all the control at all times.
4. its forever an illusion, a lie
you experience the 3d via 5 senses which are limited asf. things you see might not be the things that are actually happening. i cant see gravity pulling me down, does that mean theres no gravity?
5. it does not have a mind of its own, its dead
how can the 3d think for itself if its only job is copying imagination? it is a limited version of imagination that is only a mirror. the 3d doesnt hate you, its not your enemy, you are assuming it is. you see how you always assume meaning because you have all the power? the 3d doesnt have that power. its dead means it has no original power. its nothing but presenting self like how a channel is presented on your tv (3d). it is indifferent, it doesnt mean anything, it is only a screen reflecting self.


6. the 3d follows, it never precedes
it cannot do anything without your decision, anything that happens is as a result of your state/your assumptions. it will always follow self (reflection of you). it cannot act out and give you what you dont want unless you change self. so it only follows you around. it has no control to take the first action because you are the first action.
the 3d is always below you because you are always in control of it as the operant power. you decide, you choose, you assume, you become, you embody, whatever word you like to use, you will always be above the 3d. everything is in your control always.
but the 3d never matters bc ur 3d could be an absolute mess but u can still manifest. why? bc its all about self! you can always change self and that, by law, changes the 3d. so the 3d only changes when YOU change. this is why we tell you to just focus on changing self!

i decide i am the version of me who has what i want in imagination (changing self) and its done. i know the 3d is nothing so if i see something i dont want: "its a lie" "its an illusion" whatever words you like, either way its neutral. i just gave it to myself so it rly is done.
"Life does not care whether you call yourself rich or poor; strong or weak. It will eternally reward you with that which you claim as true of yourself." - neville g
the 3d doesnt care about anything except what you assume yourself to be / your state (SELF) bc that is what it copies.
even when you think youre powerless, youre still being powerful…
*you will always be greater than the 3d because you are forever the operant power. it doesnt matter if you think or assume you arent be you always are. if you assume the 3d is more powerful, the 3d will reflect that, BECAUSE you as the OPERANT POWER decided that. so even if things seem bad, you have all the power at every moment and what you see is just the 3d presenting self. it SEEMS like ur not in power but since you continue assuming that, ofc that will reflect which proves you are always the operant power even w a shitty 3d.
the 3d is rly nothing bc the 3d changes under my power every time. once you understand that you are the operant power, everything else turns small. the 3d isnt the big bad wolf. its simply a reflection of you! do not view a REFLECTION of you as greater than YOU.
kisses, jani ☆
#etherealkissed🎀#etherealkissed#loa blog#law of assumption#manifesting#loassumption#neville goddard#edward art#imagination creates reality#master manifestor#loa states#4d reality
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thinking about shotgunning with abby for the first time #needthat
cw - oral (r!recieving), petnames (baby, angel, sweetheart), drug usage, afab reader, overstimulation ?? nawt proofread
you asked abby about smoking around a week and a half ago. she was shocked that her girlfriend would ever be interested weed. if she could recall you absolutely hated when she smoked around you. everytime you went to her place you begged her not to because of the smell. so what's the change of heart now.
"been rly stressed abs. isn't this shit supposed to help?" you point at her stash on her desk. "yeah why? don't tell me little miss i-hate-weed wants to start smoking."
"i mean it wouldn't hurt to try. finals and work been kicking my ass." you plop down onto her bed next to abby, turning to face her.
she already starts messaging her plug. "well i'm gonna be honest i dont want you buying from anyone. so ill buy it for you and test it out, see if its right for you. so maybe next week?" abby suggests.
"aw thank you baby." you whisper against her skin, nuzzling your head in the crook of her neck.
so that was a week ago.
you already requested off the next day, scared shitless you wouldn't even sober up by then.
you watch her intensively as she rolls and lights the blunt with ease. she has you in her lap, laughing at how you're so intrigued over the simple action. "what... stop laughing at me abs." you push her shoulder lightly, shuffling a little bit closer on her lap. abby reaches over for the lighter bringing it up to the blunt. "m not angel, just think it's cute how you're acting over this. here."
she hands you the blunt, placing it between your thumb and pointer fingertips. "just inhale it baby, not that hard." you place the blunt between your lips, taking a drag out of it slowly.
it's seconds after you break out in a coughing fit, gripping onto abby's shirt. you feel like you're about to die, your eyes watering and you start wheezing and coughing. "what the fuck. what am i doing wrong" you question, handing it back to abby. she takes a drag out of her wonky ass perfectly rolled blunt. no coughing, no wheezing, nothing.
"how about we try this. open your mouth." she takes another drag, watching your pretty little lips open wide for her. you close your eyes and abby blows smoke into you mouth. you inhale as she exhales, taking all of what she gives you.
when she finished shotgunning you, you definitely feel it a bit already but nothing crazy. "again abs." you whine loudly. "i like this more than doing it myself." abby takes another drag to blow in your mouth. how could she ever say no to you.
the blunt was completely finished. you being high revealed some things abby didn't even know. you're definitely not a lightweight shockingly and you get extremely horny when under the influence. so much she had to help her poor baby out.
"abs...slow d..down." you whine against one of the pillows on your girlfriend's bed. she's been lapping at your folds for about 30 minutes, not having the nerve to stop after orgasms. her strong arms were wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer everytime you tried to pull away. "mmm just one more please baby" she muffled against your glistening folds, the vibrations making you go utterly crazy.
it was too much. you probably have had three orgasms so far. abby still wanted more. she forgot all about the blunt you two shared almost an hour ago. she was high off your sweet cunt, intoxicated with how your body would squirm within her grasp. one after the other she did not give you a break. she just needed her gorgeous girl to give her one more.
"fuck fuck fuck i'm g-gonna-" you whimpered loudly, wandering hands finding its way to tug at her blonde roots.
"cum? c'mon angel give it to me." she borderline whined just now, her lips perfectly wrapped around your swollen cunt, sucking non stop. her thick fingers found its way inside you, making a slow scissoring motion. "baby- feels s-so good..." you weren't going to last any longer by the looks of it.
after a few more seconds of the constant sucking and fingering, your juices released all over your girlfriend's face and fingers. your back was arched off the bed, hands almost pulling abby's hair out. after catching your breath you looked down at her between your legs, scoffing at the grin on abby's face. "fuck baby, squirted all over my face too?" she chuckled, leaning her head against your thigh.
"when is gonna be our next session sweetheart?"
a/n - been watching tlou 2 gameplays i genuinely need her #bad
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any hcs abt soda/darry and how they feel abt PaperCut/Curly ?
YKNOW WHAT I COULD TALK ABOUT THIS FOR A GOOD LONG WHILE IM TOTALLY EXPLAINING THIS ONE I HAVE A LOT TO SAY☝🏽
sodas thoughts on em
i said it before and ill say it again, soda doesnt HATE curly, i truly don’t think he does, it takes a lot to make a guy like soda hate someone, however i don’t think he likes curly either, and that truly ONLY comes from the fact that curlys hanging out w pony. to say soda woukd hate curly feels like a huge mischaracterization that i see in fics and DONT GET ME WRONG its interesting, but it gets to a point where it gets a lillllll boring???? cause ikkk if curly was just some regular greaser who wasn’t close to them, i don’t think he would rlly care much for what he was doing. u gotta remember that he lets pony hang out w DALLAS here and there, and i’m willing to bet that it’s bc he knows pony doesn’t look up to him. but w curly, it’s obvious pony LIKES being around him and look it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see that them being around each other is a literal danger, he’s protective of pony as is, to have some HOODLUM!! around pony scares him even more so bc they’re around the same age and pony technically doesn’t have anyone who’s his age so he knows pony’s naturally seeking that out. there’s only so much the gang can rlly do for pony!!
and i will die on the hill that as much as he “slightly doesnt like” curly, he still does care for him!! theres a cap on how little he doesnt bc he knows that at the end of the day, curlys also a troubled kid looking for connections. if things were different, i dont think soda would rlly mind them being together cause he knows they make each other happy, and thats all he could rlly want.
darrys thoughts on em
dare i say,,,i dont think darry would gaf AS MUCH as ppl say
i dont think darry is HOVERING over them wondering what theyre doing 24/7, i say this bc again, they let pony hang w dally sometimes, but then even without dally being there, if he didnt exist, they STILL wouldnt care bc EVERYONE around town acts the way curly does. they dont have the biggest moral high ground bc theyre pretty desensitized to what crimes ppl commit. add on the fact that darry got bills to pay and yea i cant see him putting all his energy into helicopter parenting pony like that.
only time he ever would b like that is around the time he knows the social worker is gonna visit, where darrys more stressed and wants everything to go smoothly, so pony is t taken away from him, i dont think u can rlly blame him for that😭
AND YKNOW WHAT??? i think darry cares more for papercut/curly than soda does partially bc he sees himself in curly (and pony) when he was younger!! carefree, just doing anything they wanted, and yes times have changed, that doesnt mean he wants to keep pony on a tight leash. its usually darry who has to pull soda back and just b like “let it go”, soda cant fathom it and no amount of explaining could rly make him understand, over the years hes just gonna have to see it for himself
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examples of atla live action’s attempts to be more feminist and how they actually had the opposite effect and/or hurt the integrity of the show
already talked about katara and pakku. does not make sense that she did not have a master. point blank. just because something sounds empowering (ie katara saying “yes. and ur looking at her.” after zuko asked if she found a master) doesn’t mean it automatically is. there still needs to be logic and katara “being her own master” defies logic imo im sorry!
katara in general. she has no ferocity here which to be very honest i dont think is fully the writers’ fault. some of the blame goes on them but the actress for katara just delivered alllllll of her lines w the same exact mild tone. katara is overly motherly. she is bossy. she is passionate. she is nurturing. she is emotional. THERE IS POWER IN THESE THINGS!!!!! why would we take away her spark?!?!?!
i loved live action suki. however, i LOVE the line in the original when her and sokka part ways and sokka says “i treated u like a girl when i should’ve treated u like a warrior.” and suki says “i am a warrior” *kisses sokka on the cheek* “but im a girl too.” THAT LINE WAS SO PERFECT like lemme say it again there is POWER IN FEMININITY! there is no shame in that!!!!! why does this show wanna take that away so badly. at one point live action suki says something like “im not just a warrior, im a kiyoshi warrior” and before she parts ways w sokka she thanks him for showing her some of the world or something like that. which was fine but i just love the simplicity of the original. a girl can be a warrior and have a crush. why do we have to change that?
this is a small one and it doesnt REALLY matter, but i cant help but think they changed this to be more “feminist” which is just dumb. yue isnt betrothed? well she was but she broke it off? and hahn (her ex) isnt a huge dick? i mean it wasn’t the worst thing and i didnt really mind it but i was just kinda like ?????. feel like yue being betrothed tied into her sense of responsibility and foreshadowed the sacrifices she will make for her people. so. feels rly weird that they changed it. i think it was to show more women agency which is always cool. but in the original, yue finally gets her agency by becoming the moon spirit. that should be the end of her character arc. idk. a weird change that seemed unnecessary.
sokka not being sexist. honestly i think the live action did a good job at omitting this while not REALLY making it feel like something was missing. with that being said, something was still missing lol. once again, its apart of sokka’s character. i feel like everyone has already expressed their hate for this so ill just leave it at that.
i am a TAD indifferent on the women of the northern tribe joining the forces during the fight. on one hand i cant lie i smiled bc obviously i love water bending and i love women so there was definitely apart of me that was happy to see that moment. however. it was kind of giving like in endgame when theres that random shot of all the women superheroes in one frame so the movie could have a “slay queen. we are girlbosses:)” moment. like it just felt a little empty and it wasnt the feminist battlecry they thought it was. these women have been healing their whole lives. why would they be any good on the frontlines of a fight? they never learned combat skills! HOWEVER, when we see them, its mainly just them reinforcing the walls so like. that makes enough sense. im cool w that.
i know im dwelling but as we know i hold atla in the highest regards. it does a lot of things perfectly imo. and one of the things i think it does PERFECTLY is its treatment of female characters. literally the only thing i can think of that i dont like is when team azula beats the kiyoshi warriors and ty lee says something like “u are NOT prettier than us” NDBSKSJDJ like ok that was weird. but anyways. it irritates me how the live action kind of seems to have this pov that says “the original was good, but there were some ideas and plots that were outdated so we changed them to keep with the times” like they’re fixing something that was broken if that makes sense. when in actuality, i think atla’s representation of women is perfect and timeless. it was relevant and powerful in 2005, and it is equally as relevant and powerful in 2024. there was nothing about its feminist themes that needed to be “fixed” or “updated”.
#personal#atla#avatar the last airbender#avatar#avatar the last airbender live action#avatar live action#live action avatar the last airbender#live action atla#atla live action
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as another fruity tguy i really REALLY love the way u draw men so so much i see your work and i feel warm from head to toe cause you make trans men so beautiful. i can feel in every work that you love transmascs and being a tmasc and it comes thru in every paintstroke to me.
sorry to hijack with a big paragraph but last anon rly spoke to me and i wanted to share my experience if its ok
to last anon-- my journey is perhaps different from others but for me when i started T i also felt like it was the most important, life or death thing, but after spending time on T i found that even if the results werent as Manly as i was hoping for originally, i suddenly found myself in love with the simple fact that i had changed and my body had changed in a way that was on MY terms, even if it wasnt """perfectly passing"". since then ive found that not having T or having to lower my dosage was no longer painful or frightening.. im not sure how else to explain it other than At First, it felt like the testosterone was trying to fight Against the woman that Was my body, to sort of Transform it completely into this Man, but one day i just suddenly realized "oh. im not fighting anymore. and im actually pretty happy" and even tho i wasnt Perfectly masc by a long shot there was suddenly.. peace. i fell in love with my patchy body hair and my funny voice and my weird dick and then to my own suprise i found myself falling in love with the things i used to hate and wanted to get rid of. i suddenly loved my boobs (i wanted top surgery for YEARS before t) i loved my eyelashes, i loved the way my body looked in womens clothes, and i still loved being a man. im still a man and happier with that than ive ever been, but im more feminine now than i really ever have been! and its because suddenly being a man and having this mans body was something that belonged to ME, not to anyone else. this happiness and this body were on MY terms!!! so anon, i hope that you can try hormones and you get to explore the changes that bring you joy and that you find even more joy in the things you never expected before. but if you dont get hrt? youre still one of us always. i hope you will still find the love in your heart for yourself and the man you are regardless. peace and love and trangenderism ❤️
just want to add on that i relate heavily to your part about "falling in love with the things i used to hate and wanted to get rid of" because my chest was one of my biggest source of grief pre-T and could not imagine a life for myself without top surgery, and even injured myself from binding too much. but something about being on hrt and finally seeing and experiencing myself with more masc features (and living my life as a guy, in my own way) gradually flipped a switch in my brain and i started to love my boobs. and then when i stopped T i was worried and scared i would lose that love, but now i actually love them more than ever (if my art wasnt indication enough hehe). there's so many ways to be trans, and be a man, and i'm so grateful i gave myself the patience and space to explore that, and that i can continue to explore and experience joy with it. peace and love and transgenderism forever 💙
#love how half my notifs right now are sweet and genuine messages#and the other half is people talking about how badly they want to get leon pregnant#i wouldn't have it any other way <3#ask wilt
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Random thoughts about Aphmaus Fanbase circa 2015-2018ish, MCD & Mystreet,internet culture around that time
Like most people on the internet I want to share my thoughts on something I am very passionate about
My thoughts on MCD
When it comes to MCD I truly love the story and was upset when she ended it in 2017 but know that i look back on it i understand why people were upset with the aph x garroth or aph x laurance because it did seemed very rushed thru/incomplete and due to aphmau recieveing mass amounts of hate im sure that didnt help either ,which i understand why someone would be upset about a ship they very much enjoy and it not being canon but what i dont understand is why people were saying horrible things to aphmau for their ship not being canon ( i mean srsly was it ever that big of a deal?) , but i feel like people got so focused on the ships in MCD it completely overshadowed the main story
Aphmau Fanbase 2015-2018ish
i always see tons of people online saying they were huge fans of mcd and mystreet and dont understand why she cancelled it/huge change of content and I have a theory about this kind of. I feel like the fandom at this point was split really into two main age groups 8-12 and 15-18, I know that doesnt seem like a huge age differnce in groups but I was around 7-10 When i first started watching aphmau and was not really aware of the situation going on (probably due to the fact that most of it was address on platforms like insta,twitter and a maybe few live streams on yt and i didnt rly know how to have a social media like back then) so when all the rumors that aphmau had dealt with in the past had resurfaced recently this was my first time hearing about them despite being in the fandom since 2014-15. Hearing about how Aphmau had to deal with all that unnecessary hate absolutely broke me knowing how a few people probably ruined a fandom and how we might never actually get a finished story is very sad but also Aphmau’s content now is very targeted towards children and understanding why she changed her content is her way of still being able to do what she loved and while avoiding hate
Internet culture around this time
I know internet culture sounds weird but i would say 2010-2019/20 i feel like the internet was still kind of like a town in the middle of the midwest like slightly deserted but enough human life to have small communities around ( most the time communities involving alt fashion,video games, just “nerdy” hobbies, also,unfortunately,a bunch of very triggering stuff being highlighted and glamorized(this was probably more around 2007-10 tho)) the most recent example i can think of is tiktok when tiktok first got put in place i very much remeber furry,gamers and cosplayers getting along and their being a social consequences when someone was outed for being a not so good person or just being a bully. Nowadays I cant imagine someone saying those things to aphmau and getting away with it considering how people will dig thru a influencers past internet history and find things from 10yrs ago im sure people would be able to find some random leaving hateful messages towards her and telling them to stop or sending a bunch of comments n messages to them
This is totally a rant post lol Ive just been thinking alot abt the whole situation since they have announced mystreet season 7 and im very excited for the future of mystreet and aphmaus roleplays and im hoping for a little bit more accountability in the fandom so we dont repeat the past. if u made it this far sorry if nothing makes sense its 4am 😭 and i needed to write out my thoughts or i was gunna go crazy. Goodnight yall 🤩🤩😛😛
#aphmau#minecraft diaries#minecraft#aphmau pdh#pdh#kawaii chan#garroth romeave#zane ro'meave#shipping#phoenix drop high#mystreet#love love paradise#one last time#mod mod world
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we had a beautiful baby girl <3 her name is agnes. well technically i havebt seen her so she might be butt ugly. but ill call her beautiful anyway bc shes my daughter #parenting #momtips #mommyblogger #girlmom #positiveparentingtactics #endthecycle #girldad #hesgonnabedoingtheparenting #bcimbusycommittingdeforestationataratehithertounseeninmedievalpoland #iforgothesthecooksoihavetofindanewcook.skull
halpp im playing this game and ig theres like 2 gamemodes. and in the original one you r always a man but im playing the other newer one (which is harder mainlybc the wiki is entirely focused around the other one skull) and im a woman (bc u get to make yr own character). and one small thang that ig they didnt fully think abt is that i got my husband pregnant
#it like gives u a list of names to choose from#i surpose to keep it accurate to the period + location .... very fun i kind of wish they also did that for the pc#BUT the character creation is oretty new lol#idk enough abt medieval poland to sya definitively but idt constance is realistic. Its just a name i like 2 use. bc its like me except my#names connor. but it would be constance in another life#i might start going by both but the problem is constance is so cute and connors so boring#so i feel like connor wiuld get jealous. all very tragic#and b4 u say Just stop going by connor Well we have a bloodbond and unfortunately i AM going to be connor forever#even tho i find it boring like it IS my name. yk...that justnis me#same thing w kamille like even tho i dont use it with most anymore#i am still Straight up kamille. Well. you know. etc. but like i identify a lot with the name#just bc its a feminine name i dont use it bc i dont wanna encourage anybody in my family to get any bright ideas#same w constance obvi. feminine name... the main thing is i think its cute that the nickname is connie bc ppl used to use connie as a#nickname 4 me but they dont rly anymore. but its ok#lamp usually calls me con. OR they have this STUPID BIT i HATE !!! (being dramatic) where they like. it started w jonnor#and then they did a bunch of ither letter changes#but its devolved to calling me shit like cognac (not pronounced like cognac. cog nack) or jobna or etc.
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the delivery stuff isn't even a real problem I'll just ask for the slip and pay the prescription charge its fine. I'm just stressing myself out abt it bc even tho I do want to at least try meds bc theyre statistically v likely to help me manage shit I'm very reluctant to medicate bc anything that "artificially" affects how I think/feel scares me
the titration providers love sending me huge blocks of text right when I'm at my least capable of processing the written word
#i hate feeling like i dont have full control i dont even like taking otc stuff that makes me drowsy. i dont even fucking drink man#and i have to monitor myself so closely to give them updates which is the worst possible situation for me bc ill worry and overthink#like im not a hypochondriac or whatever ik im unlikely to suffer any terrible side effects bc i generally have v good health#and i dont even drink caffeine like theres no way i can run into any accidental drug interactions#but it still stresses me out. ik its a whole transitional thing and can take months to get used to which just feels like such a commitment#last time i was on medication for a long time it was just an oral contraceptive but i reacted v badly emotionally and wasnt even rly aware#i only stopped taking it by accident but ppl said it was like i had a complete personality change lmao#but that was years ago and this is completely different its just an irrational unease#but maybe not so irrational ik some ppls mental health worsens and imma be real i dunno how much of that i can take#it feels kinda high stakes working fulltime too like i dont get a test run to adjust if i feel bad or whatever...#but at least i have a rigid schedule already so itll be easy to take early in the morning/at the same time every day#auorgh. im rambling now its almost my bedtime... at least i feel a bit better now typing it out like yeag im just thinking. too much#probably having a conversation w someone irl would help more but it feels weirdly vulnerable idk i find it difficult to bring up#even tho i literally have irl friends w adhd who are medicated for it that i could ask abt it......#ahh well. we'll see. anyway i gotta go brush my teeth then zzzz#ignore my 15 million tags 🥹 goodnigth everyone 👍#.vent#.diaries
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also. if someone wants to help. (also btw hibi lore like. the most important part methinks)
how to "keep it casual" with. lets say hypothetically. if you came to a new school in seventh grade. and met a nice guy during swedish class and kinda connected with him immediately and. then you guys are like. best friends in your opinion and you guys hang out allll the time and you kind of have the biggest crush on him and. lets say. like. you love him so fucking much its borderline unhealthy? and like. then he starts sending you flirtatious gifs and texting you so. because youre in love. you send flirtatious gifs back and you guys basically call each other love and sweetheart and everything and !! you guys hold hands and he lets you listen to his music and gives you a plastic ring to match his and gives you gifts and treats and !! holds your hand btw !!!! and nearly asks you to kiss him during a truth or dare game like. implies it strongly . so then you !! decide to ask him hey. what are we. and he goes idk and you guys hve a littl etalk because yay communication !!!!! and hes like. so. i like you . like. thats out there now okay. i like you but i also like this other guy so um. idk so!! because youre in love and would wait like fifty million lifetimes you say okay ill wait for you its okay but then the romantic interactions disappear and its like . because you guys are in a trio right? theres this other guy too. so he starts maybe confiding in the other guy a littl enad you should not feel envious he can do whatever he wants its his life but . you do but youj also dont say anything so like. a year or smth passes idk and he goes. yknow what. tbh. i dont rly like you anymofre?? like i like this other guyu and i think ill always like him and ur kinda heartbroken and shit but you say its fine i was kinda over you anyways. so . that happnes and you stil l love him so fucking much but . you dont say it because youre happy he moved on and . youre probs not worth it anyways its fine and then a ruond a month later while ur eating at lunch hes like. haha can you go away for a while i want to talk abt stuff with person 3 in our trio and youre like. okay sure !!! and then you come back nd . find out he s in love or has a crush or wever on another guy. so . apparently he wouldnt love hte other guy forever but it doesnt rleally matter at least it shouldnt so you drop it its fine . enter grade eight your friend group grows and . theres these classes where you can pick and not everyone goes to the same on e right ??? so . the rest of your friend group goes to the musci class and you go to the . cooking class . which you enjoy btw!!! like!! a lot!!!! and you attend it with another classmate of ur s and boooom youre friends. wow . hooray like. currently youre probably closest to them which is craaaaazy liek. wow. but !! bcs u attned a diff class you get shut out of alll the fun things they do and you dont really feel like you belong and you also kinda feel dsicarded and not important and invisible because !!!! the guy youre in love with yes still kinda hate that !! treats you like air. so. then you ask him whats wrong right before you go on a month long trip on summer vacation without internet access. and when youj come back you find the messag eunread and !! you stressed abt this the whole summer btw. smth smth i dont even want you back i js want to know if ruining my sparkling summer was the goal /lyr ANYWYS. you . jask abt him awgain. on discord and he says that hes changed as a person and his interests have changed and this is fine btw!!! like. you totally understand yep. and then he says that youve beeen like . kinda really annoying recently and sometimes he feels like killing himself while hanging out with you so. that s nice and also !! not being with you has made his mental state like. get better a bunch so "thats just grand".
so. mmm. also by the way this is like. summer vacation after eight grade yeah?? well. just before the seventh grade summer vacation person 3 in ur trio asked you out. and you kinda dated them. even though you ddint really have feeling because they re nice the y treat you well and you had to get over him but then around like . a year later you cant really take it anymore and its not person 3s fault at all theyve been perfetct alllll around like. the most amazing human being ever but. you just cant . you keep choosing him over them and you can see its hurting them and this isnt working nahyways so . a round a yaer later you tell them hey. not your fault i was seeking approval and shit and im like. the jerk ehre but like. thank ou so much and its a whole essay and they go okay its fine but. now youve broken someones heart so . yay you and youre still not over him so . wowww good job.
back to eight grade summer vacation?? you dont really text anyone else except from cooking class friend and person 3 and you dont want to text in the group chat because hes the most active one and you really dont want to intrude his space and . now 9th grade is statrgint in 8 hours and you just saw a message from him . saying asking you to "keep it casual" so the teachers dont come after you guys or something. so . somoene tell me how to keep it casual?? like. do you just stand next to the other guysf rom the friend group?? are you . suposeced to interact with them ???? can you still eat w the guys?????? oh and . 9 th grad eis the most inmportant year academically so i also have to get good grades from everything and actuallly focus on studies so . theres that.
tut on how to keep it casual pls okay love u guys <3
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do graves!leosagi ever get tired of their friends/family labelling them?? like maybe leo’s bros make fun of him for having a “boyfriend” and he gets like rightfully irritated by that ?
its Kinda amusing bc eventually leo’s family at least straight up thinks theyre just really good pals and its like wow ! friendship ! in a more oblivious sense like they just kinda shrug and go oh yeah usagi’s here again whatever
originally mikey was insanely insanely suspicious of usagi and what his relationship was with leo (“hes literally just a friend” “YOU MEAN A BOY-FRIEND. AND U NEVER TOLD US.” “what am i supposed 2 say do i update u guys every time i make a friend” “If I See This Fuckinf Rabbit Sleeping In Your Bed Again I’m Telling Dad” “WE WERE HAVING A SLEEPOVER”) (mikey was mainly shocked bc leo invited a friend to sleepover who they didnt know And leo didnt tell anyone there was an extra mouth to feed for brekkie) but once everything was smoothed over usagi just became another regular, similar to how april is
leo himself tells raph that its a little more than that but only raph rly knows it and hes always had a hunch about them so it didnt change much in how the brotjers saw the two
usagi’s family on the other hand is definitely more “Boyfriend? boyfriend? boyfriend? crush? romance?” kitsune teases usagi about how dramatically romantic it must be to fall for a guy he hated in the beginning and usagi is like . so filled with Eugh. This Is Not Romantic. ick feeling that it causes him to be more in denial at how close he’s gotten with leo (in the beginning at least , later on kitsune still teases him but he’s more at ease with how him and leo are, so he always jusy goes “ew no im not kissing him dates r gross” but over time she toned it down to more “ooh is someone missing a certain kappa?” kinda teasing rather than “whens the wedding/has your first kiss happened yet lmao/etc” kinda teasing)
hana calls leo his boyfriend like all the time and like . usagi doesnt rly correct her bc she’s 8 and he doesnt know how to explain that they “arent Really boyfriends sure they do things that couples would do sometimes but its platonic and well you dont rly know what platonic means uh”
so she gets a pass on all her “IS THAT YOUR BOYFRIEND” comments since usagi is just like “yeagh its leo u wanna say hi”
auntie notices how leo visits a lot and she kinda just is like “okay ur like my kid now. lol.” she thinks they are just best friends bc usagi said they are and who is she to think otherwise, she kinda just absorbs leo (and later on the hamatos) as her own family and doesnt question their relatiomship much
chizu and gen tend to stay out of usagi’s personal business like that But gen did think that leo was a girl for a good while before he was ever introduced to him . and he was like “usagi if you wanna pick up the ladies u need like. do better. than this” “what. What” “like take a shower man” trying to give him flirting/relationship advice without actually knowing leo at all and also assuming usagi is straight
all in all its never really serious if people call them boyfriends or just best friends bc they dont really care to correct anyone it only matters if its like “so did you hit the [insert romantic relationship milestone] phase yet haha” bc that gets tiring to hear constantly
mainly all their family is just like “oh okay” at their relationship since i dont Really want to make the hardships of being aroace or being queer a big point since we already struggle enough with that irl ! a few details here and there about how their unlabelled status confuses some people but generally just a “we’ve seen weirder shit who cares” kinda energy to it
i love rambling . Thank you for the wuestion ily /p
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thinkinh about this again..
my idea is that the maw is what remains of an old god that got absolutely obliterated when the void attacked the shadowlands. obliterated so bad that all that remained was a concept, an untethered hunger and fleeting consciousness
torghast is the original oribos, changed from its original purpose into a lock and key on this hunger as zovaal willingly sank it and himself down into the maw's depths in order to be its jailer
the hunger of the maw erodes at his being over eons until it can latch on to him fully and turn him into its agent
zerith mortis can still exist bc the more i think about it the more im not all that terribly bothered by it. the maw wants to find it so it can use the big celestial 3D printer to craft itself a new body. as the immortals of death are basically titans, this would be Bad. instead of corrupting a titan it would just turn itself into one
apparently in the shadowlands beta there was flavour text for an item that said that the maw wasn't always the maw, but it was removed before launch
i wonder if that was left over from an earlier iteration of the shadowlands plot bc that's actually really interesting to me. the idea that the maw didn't always exist i mean, bc as many other people have pointed out ad nauseam, the maw seems kind of counter to the whole existence of the shadowlands. if the idea is that everything in the shadowlands is a closed system wrt to the flow of anima, the maw is a hole. it should not exist as it is
so if it wasn't always the maw, then what was it? and what happened that was so terrible that it qas created?
#the actual landmass of the maw would be what remains part of bastion that got caught in the crossfire#and just like in the actual canon it 'grows' as more souls are ground into literal dust#i. dont really hate shadowlands. i still accept it as 'canon' bc i think its neat#i do think it got absolutely ratfucked during its development#not on purpose but just. Things clearly happened that we as non-blizz devs are not privy to that clearly had an impact#the jailer having a very drastic redesign between the initial reveal at blizzcon and the alpha is proof that Something happened#we could wonder and ponder for years over what happened behind the scenes but in the end they happened and we cant rly change that#zovaal#warcraft#i do personally think it had something to do w the investigation bc the timing lines up#just a gut feeling on that
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super agree with johnny being sooo sooo soooo good irl i still remember taking a moment (it was several days) thinking about him from the link like girl!!! sorry to hc (my og) but jhn is just a MAN you feel? nobody like him in kpop too ngl idk how there are nct fans who sleep on his looks and charm lol
also so true that jaemin is a real gorgina hes so stunning irl like seeing him up on the concert jumbotrons is crazy as if a filter is on him always but up in front of you wow like people joke about him being a princess but fr he does!! haha (and idk i think its kinda interesting? that he takes care of himself to that extent)
im curious though how do you find jeno irl i personally find him so frickin adorable since he just has silly stage antics that happen in a blink (like you gotta follow him sometimes even though hes not performing/at center stage) its so endearing though i do think his stage presence is pretty good too i look forward to watching him move (although 1 step after haechan haha) i do feel hes quite small though like smol but i do feel the boys from dream all kinda are(?) no hate i love my man even though i know aint 5'10


that one tweet that said ‘I hate how Johnny Omegafies every man.’ or whatever. just saw this video and thought…..damn Jaehyun is tiny😭😭😭😭
yeah like you know the on-going joke all ‘I went to Korea and no one looks like Jungkook!!’ I mean, they do now. he started a revolution out there lmaockeodo but some tattoos piercing and a bowl cut wont change the face….still NO ONE LOOKS LIKE JOHNNY. like no, they are not touching him. man, Johnny was meant for America fr💔💔
Jaemin is truly man pretty, he looks like a doll that made a wish to be human. I hate to say he’s probably gay and not just extremely vain but also, could be a toss up. I don’t know him so I can only say how I’d perceive him as a man walking past me on the street, but he is really a 10, across the board. I now use Lanolin lips bc of him… and the fact that a MAN is the one who got me on some of the best lip balm I’ve used…says something. I take a lot of advice from gay men online so I’m definitely side-eyeing him, but its very is he gay…or just Korean😭
as for Jeno , I was just talking abt this before I went to sleep.


yes he is a very tiny and short guy. like I said 5’9 at best, and he LOOKS petite, like his frame. he’s all solid muscle but he’s not big/broad. other than that as I said its hard for me to look at him and not think the sun shines out of his ass bc not only is Jeno…who he is, and you know, you’ve read the fics, he’s also the nicest idol I have ever biased. THE nicest, he rly makes an effort to treat his fans/czennies like they are special, NCTZENS DO NOT DESERVE HIM!!!!!!
so yeah…..the sun does actually shine out of his ass bc I won’t say I have had bad experiences with any idols(I haven’t, they’re all working and hey work sucks sometimes), but you can tell some of them are happier to be there than others and Jeno is very much the happy employee that makes you day feel less shitty bc his energy is so good. I would grab the moon for him if I could. sometimes its hard for me to go back and get into a fictional ‘mean’ Jeno mindset bc he’s SOOOOOOO lovely and nice and sweet and adorable and needs all the love in the world returned for how precious he is.
BUT DONT GET ME WRONG!!!!!!! he is very sexy and a little scary, like yeah….seeing him irl solidified for me that I could never. I COULD NEVER!!!! he’s very much my comfort idol, I love him so much. I feel like Sunflowers and their boy mom ass behavior when it comes to Jeno, he can do no wrong in my eyes😭😭
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