#i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed
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selfinflictedgunshotwound · 5 months ago
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sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible
#trying to keep it together so bad because i already know the problems and solutions and whatnot but i cannot do anything#i desperately just need to do something. accomplish any task. actually several would be nice. but i cannot stand just letting life go by#while i watch other people have the things i want. or even metaphorically living my dream like. that should be me why am i settling for thi#i hate even talking about this because i feel so stupid when i know it's not even a real tangible problem and that i actually DO have real#problems to tackle and the ability to do so but i'm choosing to be upset over the stupidest things i could possibly be sad about#and i can't even be sad about it in a normal way i'm cycling through like several different reactions to smth that isn't even real#or if it is real i literally do not have tanglible evidence for it one way or another like i'm driving myself insane for no reason#i can't even get catharsis because all i'm doing is digging a deeper hole for something i never should've gone back into in the first place#because i KNOW how i am i KNOW how i react to things and i still chose to do it lmao.#and i continue to choose to go through this shit instead of actively trying to change my life because... i'm lazy? and stupid? idk#negative self-talk isn't gonna get me to do anything either so let's just say i'm feeling particularly unmotivated like usual#i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed#a test in chemistry or something. like i yearn for that simplicity becasue at this point all i'm doing is ruining my own life LMAO#i'm too scared to live i'm too scared to die so i just sit here and fantasize that life could be amazing if i wait#and i'll magically get everything i've ever wanted if i just wait long enough. and i know it isn't true and i still wait for it to happen.#because honestly like. i think deep down i am just convinced i will fail at anything i do when that shouldn't be what scares me.#what scares me should be never even allowing myself to fail because i never tried to do anything at all with myself or my life#like. wake the fuck up. get off your ass and put in the effort. learn some skills. gain independence and stability and discipline and do it#just live please i'm begging you just live so i can be happy don't i deserve to be happy... why am i not letting myself be happy#i'm literally keeping myself trapped in this negative feedback loop ON PURPOSE because teehee shiny toy#and it doesn't matter if the love is real it doesn't matter how i feel like i'm just using it as a distraction i can't say it's motivation#because it's barely motivated me at all. i have to start being realistic. 25 & just realizing you actually have to participate in your life#anyways. i've cried i've agonized i've pictured killing myself in 30 different ways. i think the only way i'm gonna feel better is#to just actually try this time without giving up. wish me luck
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sweetnans · 4 months ago
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Stuck in the moment || Bakugo, K. (pt.6)
Pairing: fuckboy Bakugo/hopelessly romantic fem. reader
summary: You made a mistake, a huge mistake. You fucked the most cocky, annoying, bastard, fuckboy you knew. Bakugo Katsuki. And that fact was against all your beliefs. Now, after the rumor (truth) spread like a pandemic virus in college you'll have to live with the stormy consequences of your acts and whatever trash was brought with it.
a/c: Hey, it's me again. Here we are in a new series I plan to continue. I really hope you enjoy it. I put my favorite man in action (bakugo) being a selfish bastard that you would love eventually and I couldn't help to put another "trope" I'm a sucker for (guardian/father figure Aizawa) I'm so sorry if that bothers you. Once again, I'm sorry if I misspelled something, English is not my first language. (Not proofread yet)
Pt.1 Pt.2 Pt.3 Pt.4 Pt.5 -> Pt.7 ♡
m.list
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Bakugo was kinda fun to be around with. He actually made you laugh and not because of his faces every time you blurted the most unhinged question for him. He made you laugh verbally, with his own words, and the sentence wasn't one full of hate and despise. He was, without wanting it, fun.
For you, it fell like a truce, and the thought of being friends with him didn't scare you anymore. The second thoughts and plans of getting rid of him just by ignoring him disappeared along with the security that he was going to try something with you. He didn't.
You felt lightweight. Like a feather being carried with the breeze. Or that was Denki told you when you tried to verbalize what you felt. There was no weight on your shoulders anymore trying to dodge every bullet Bakugo threw at you just by being himself. You were walking on eggshells, and now it felt amazing that you weren't feeling distraught by just thinking of bumping into him in the hallways.
Somehow, that relieved your anxiety of having an upcoming date with Todoroki. You were planning on what to wear very calmly with Jirou's help and fantasizing how it would be.
You've made your peace.
Back in your real life, outside the mess of your head, you had to complete your homework and study for midterms. So you were genuinely happy that you could accomplish that without feeling so rachet about yourself.
"Is college more difficult than school?" Eri asked while you two were both doing your school/college chores in Aizawa's apartment.
"I don't know. I think you have to find a steady pace and find a good method to study, and everything should be fine. " You hummed your response, and she squinted at you. "What?"
"But you're like a genius, that doesn't count"
Eri had entered the age where she hated school. The rebellious phase for every teenager. She was still a cute girl who didn't give Aizawa any problem, but that didn't mean that it was easy trying to get her to do her homework.
"Well, you have brains too," you shrugged. "I know you don't like to do this stuff but at least we can spend some time together, like old times"
You loved her with your entire soul, and she welcomed you with open arms when Aizawa introduced you two. You both treated each other like sisters.
"Yeah, I think you're right." She smiled and directed her eyes to her assigment. "You've been kinda missing lately"
"It's been messy, not going to lie about it," you continued your writing while she was fidgeting with her pen.
"A boy, right?" She raised her eyebrow and smirked.
"What?" You dropped your pencil and looked at her nervously. You knew that Eri was very prone to hearing things without meaning it, and that was because Aizawa and Hizashi usually forgot that she's around when they speak things about college.
"I heard Aizawa talking to...I can't remember actually who, but he said something about a guy named Bakugo. I think I remember him, a loudly blonde guy with a grumpy face"
The thing about you two is that you always shared secrets. She constantly overheard things and never stuttered on telling or asking you whatever the topic was.
You constantly forgot how she was there before you. Like you were the older and you acted like an older sister for her but it was really weird that she, when she was little, used to be around them most of the time. You knew the war provoked that the grown-ups had to take their time to fix the world, so they asked students to babysit her. Mirio, one of the oldest, always stayed around. Even now, he made sure to have time to take her out. They went to amusement parks together, to the movies, to the arcade. Mirio had a busy life as a hero but never forgot his roots.
"Uhm, I don't know exactly what you heard, but it's just a friendship, nothing romantic, I swear." You were afraid that she had heard something about the one night stand you had with him, but you knew that even if Aizawa was oblivious about Eri eavesdropping, he would never share that piece of information with anyone.
"I don't mind. Your last boyfriend was a jackass so the set bar is pretty low." She said, waving her hand mindlessly.
With the teen years and rebellious age, as you can tell, she became savage.
"Accurately rude," you stated. "Anyways, just so you know and because I love you, I'm having a date this friday with the son of Endeavor"
The way she looked at you like you were joking made you cackle. You nodded, reaffirming your sentence, and she denied not believing you.
"The guy with the mismatched eyes?" You moved your head up and down, and she put both of her hands in her mouth. "He is cute"
"I know!" You giggled while she quickly closed her books.
"I need to know everything"
Aizawa scolded both of you for not finishing your chores before dinner but it was totally worth it.
...
On the other hand, Bakugo was still reminiscing the moment you appeared in his room the day before. His bento, clean and empty, was forgotten in his desk while he could still pictured you spinning in his chair.
The moment he watched you disappear, running after Todoroki was a decisive point in his mind. He only knew two emotions when it came to you, utterly giddy feelings that he didn't know he had, and that made him feel in constant denial and the second one, rage. Those feelings evolved in things more complicated. Rage evolved in stubbornness, prideful and insecurity. Why wasn't he good enough?
But then, you turned the things in your favor again, and he felt, aside from happy, vulnerable. Was that the only thing it took to have him back? A few 'I'm sorry' and a bag of cookies? If it was anyone, he would close the door at their nose, but it was you, and he couldn't help feeling the sincerity in your actions.
"What do you think about her?" Bakugo asked Denki, who was very busy trying to win a race in Mario Kart against Sero.
They were hanging in his room. After all, it was the only place available for stuff them all without annoying anyone. Sero and Denki were challenging themselves on Mario Kart, Kirishima was reading a sports magazine, and Mina was painting her nails.
"She is my best friend. I mean, aside from Jirou, " he answered, calculating a drift and avoiding a banana peel.
"Isn't she your girlfriend?" Sero chimed in, stumbling in the banana peel that Denki avoided before. "Oh man," he whined, seeing how toad twirled many times.
Mina started talking about you, how you seemed very nice but a little shy and how she was pretending to invite you for a drink or five. Bakugo's friend knew how he was, so he didn't mind asking about you with all of them there.
"Yep, but she's also my best friend. Anyway, forget about Jirou. " he turned the conversation about you again. "She's a very good friend, loyal. She's very attached to her past, but I don't blame her. She stays in between Jirou and me, like she's goofy funny and likes to throw silly jokes, but unlike me, she can ground herself very quickly, she doesn't need a Jirou to stay put. She's always supportive, and I'm really happy to have her"
Denki meant every word he said. He was very fond of you because you were so easy to be with. You didn't judge him for his lack of intellectual (academically) it was actually the opposite. Every time he felt down, you were the first one cheering him up and highlighting some other qualities he had.
"That's very manly bro" Kirishima threw both of his thumbs up with a big smile plastered on his face, completely forgetting he had a magazine on his hands.
"I really hope that you talk about me like that too, bunch of assholes!" Mina mumbled.
"Nah, we mostly talk about your lack of reasoning when you decide to wear animal print. That's so last decade!" Sero joked.
"You son of a bitch!" Mina yelled throwing him a pillow who ended up being one of the many reasons he lost in the race. "Haha, you deserved that loser." She stuck her tongue out, and Sero mimicked her.
"Please don't tear up my fucking room" Bakugo scolded them and they returned to their activities.
"Also, about Mina saying she's shy, she's not... she's chaotic in a way that no one expects her to be. You always see her so composed, but she's an entire other person once she's in his comfort zone. " Denki laughed at a memory that came back to his mind from one of the nights you two went out.
The last sentence of Denki had him motivated. He didn't need an excuse when it came to you, but he was eager and stubborn, and he needed to see with his own eyes that hidden part of you.
He knew exactly what he had to do.
...
You made your way back to your room when the sun was far from down. Eri and you turned the study session into a pancake dinner day. Save to say that Aizawa's white roof would never be white again unless he put all his soul to clean the stains of the batter away.
Rubbing your eyes because of the lack of sleep, you entered your building and walking like a zombie to your floor. You were happy to be alone. Jirou sent you a message that she would be staying at Denki's room for the night and you could never be happier. You were tired in a way that was draining your soul. Midterms were coming like a wave ready to crash adding the past event in your life that wreck the normality of it. But now, you had studied all the afternoon, you sure would have a good night of sleep and the Bakugo topic was more than solved.
Everything was making sense again. Oh and don't forget your upcoming date.
You let yourself breathe again and expand the capacity of your lungs like you were inhaling oxygen for the first time. It felt actually nice, it was like rebooting yourself just by doing so mundane like breathing.
"About time"
Nevermind.
Bakugo stood beside your room door looking hot as ever. He was wearing a black hoodie with his cap on, a matching jogger in his lower part.
"What are you doing here?" you whispered. It was late and there wasn't a soul around.
"I was running and decided to check on you" he shrugged when you stood in front of him squinting your eyes in disbelief. "Fine, there's one lie and one truth in that sentence"
You crossed your arms on top of your chest and he couldn't help eyeing your neckline.
"The truth is that I was running" he smirked and you rolled your eyes trying to hide your smile. Damn bastard. "Are we going to talk here? on the hallway?"
Taking the keys out of your pocket you reached to put them inside the lock, turning the knob after. Switching the lights, you dropped your bag in your desk and sat in your bed exhaling and laying yourself on top of the duvet.
"Did you bring food?" you asked to say something. Your stomach was full of pancakes but the thought of his cooking had you almost drooling.
"Nah, I have a proposal for you and if you say yes maybe and just maybe I'll reward you with a dish"
A proposal? You pushed your body up ready to read him. Was he joking? Maybe it was just like when he asked you to be friends or maybe it was something worse, like breaking his promise. You knew that accepting his friendship would have its perks, like the possibility of him trying to get under your pants. You were making mental jumps because of it. You knew very well the men like him, cocky, unreachable with superiority complex.
"It's not what you think" he huffed annoyed. "I'm not going to start an argument because of your lack of trust"
If you thought that you could read him, you were wrong and the worst part is that he could do that to you instead. Were you that transparent?
"I'm listening" you said trying to maintain your face neutral.
The vibe in the room changed, there wasn't that fun and easy-going atmosphere anymore. You were expecting the most mischievous proposal but instead, you were surprised when he opened his mouth.
"My mom is hosting a party and she's making me go with a plus one. I invited everyone but they all have plans. If I show up by myself she's going to be the death of me for the entire night" he murmured loud enough for you to hear. It seemed that just by saying that he was losing at least half of his pride.
"So you want me to go with you..." you stated the obvious.
"You're my last resource, don't let the invitation get over your head" he said breaking eye contact with you and rumaging through your stuff.
"Oh you do know how to make a girl feel special" you said sarcastically.
Laying down, you went back to your positions now, instead of just resting, thinking. The truth was that after imagining the worst case scenario you couldn't come with an excuse good enough to said no to him.
"What's the dress code?" you asked watching at your roof. You heard how he was picking every stuff from your desk as well as you did with his stuff on his room.
"Don't worry about it, I have something for you to wear" he answered nonchalantly
Of course he has. You said under your breath in exasperation. Now you were actually caged. There was no opportunity of saying no.
"Fine" you hummed in response.
Bakugo felt like his heart was about to explode. When he asked Denki about you and came with that idea he was expecting that you would be hard to crack. He had at least three different forms of convincing you to go to the party with him. He didn't use one.
"I'm going to pick you up tomorrow at six, be ready by that. I'll send the dress first thing in the morning"
He was finding hard to keep his neutral facade with you, like he wasn't excited about it.
"Tomorrow!?" you exclaimed standing in a quick movement. "Are you fucking with me?"
The look on your face was between a bottle of water in the middle of the dessert and a loudly clown in a silent room. He didn't know that he needed to see you in distress until now and he was quite amused at your panicked state.
"Yeah it's nothing just a stupid party with a lot of people" he rolled his eyes acting bored.
It didn't sound like nothing to you. You knew Bakugo's parents were important in the fashion industry and now he was dropping a bomb like it wasn't going about to explode in your face.
He grabbed the knob of your door and twisted it until the door was open in front of him.
"Don't you worry, it's not like there will be the most important people of Japan" he paused and then a wicked smile appeared on his face. "Oh shit, yeah there will"
He left you dumbfounded and alone with the train of thoughts that appeared right after he closed the door. And you thought you will be having a nice night of sleep? The world was messing with you again.
In his room, hanging in the doors of his closet, Bakugo had the stunning dress he had picked that afternoon after he kicked out all of his friend out of his room. A red satin long dress with an opening in the right leg. He didn't know if you had matching shoes but he make sure of that when the assitant of the shop handed him the dress. Lacy high heels he knew you would love.
Everyone knew that Bakugo was a smart man, and being in the industry for years without wanting it made him learn things unconsciously like what size people were only by looking at them. He was sure that the dress and the shoes would fit you and, of course, make you way more gorgeous than you already were.
Your night was summed up in pacing all night. You walked through your room, you rearranged your desk three times, you even changed your bed sheets a week earlier trying to succumb the anxiety rising up from the pit of your stomach.
Well, what's done is done. You already said yes and there was no enough amount of excuse that would prevent you from going.
You've never attended a nice party before. You looked up Bakugo's parents on the internet and the sight of them smiling in a picture wearing haute couture made you shrink in your position in bed. You thought about biting your nails but then a reasonable thought appeared on your mind, there was no way that you would go to that party and meet those people with your nails all bitten.
Finally, the sun was up in the sky and you made it through the night sleeping the vast amount of four hours. You felt fresh like a rotten veggie rusting in the back of the fridge.
Just as he said, a few little knocks on your door startled you right after you opened your eyes.
"Why is Bakugo sending you this?" Denki raised his left brow while raising the dress covered in a gray bag.
No hello, no how are you's, straight to the damn point.
"Uhm, where's Jirou?" If you were going to explain yourself you'll rather doing it just once.
"She went to the bathroom, she's coming tho, what's going on?" He took a step inside of the room and left the dress on top of your dresser removing the wrinkles with his hands.
"Here I am! I took a piss almost standing with a feet inside the stall and the other outside the bathroom, what the hell is going on!?"
Curious Jirou was your absolute favorite when you weren't involved in the thing she wanted to know because you were almost sure that she was just a few seconds away of grabbing your bedside table's lamp to hold it above your eyes to interrogate you.
"Bakugo invited me to this thing of his parents because no one was able to go with him, not a big deal" you waved your hand at them like it was actually nothing when you were boiling on the inside.
"Not big deal??" She exclaimed. "I took a peak of that dress and girl, that didn't seem like not a big deal" she quoted you in the air and you walked to the dress to pry inside.
The way both of your hands rose to clap your mouth shut proved Jirou right.
A red satin dress whose fabric and lacy straps screamed money and luxury to you laid flat and still in your hand-me-down duvet.
"It also came with these" Denki appeared above your shoulder with a pair of strappy heels.
You shook your head several times in disapproval. No. When Bakugo said that he had a dress, you never expected for him to casually lend you a, you could guess, a few pairs of zero dress. And heels that would match its glamor and price.
"What are you doing?" Jirou asked Denki in a hum.
"Looking at the price of this thing" He scanned the dress with his phone and shook his head and then he scanned the heels. "The dress is nowhere to be found but the heels, oh my god, don't even touch that"
"Don't be ridiculous, I don't think is that exp-" Jirou's eyes widen, and you could swear that they were about to pop out of their sockets. "Don't touch them? More like, don't breathe near them!"
"Dial his number Denki. I need to talk to him now. " You rushed to your friend while he was taking his phone out of his jacket.
"Put him on speaker," Jirou commented side eyeing you.
After a few rings, the sound of static and him clearing his throat startled the three of you.
"If something happened to that dress I swear to god-" Bakugo gruff voice echoed in your room.
"It's not that! When you said a party, I thought you meant like a casual party, almost as a jeans and top party, not a champagne toast, chandeliers and limousines party" you freaked out.
"Oh, so you liked the dress," he said, and you could practically see the smirk plastered on his face.
"There's no way I'm going to use that. The shoes cost more than my whole tuition!"
"I don't see the problem. Besides, you're not that clumsy to tear them up in just one night. I assure you nothing is going to happen, I'm going to pick you up, help you walk, and stay by your side, taking care that no one put a damn finger on it, if that is your concern"
In his own room, he was trying to keep it cool while the mere possibility of you bailing it out made his leg tremble under his desk. This was his shot. He had accepted the weird feelings he had toward you, and now he needed to taste the waters to see if there was any chance for him.
"I'm picking you up at six. Don't be late, " he hung up.
He wouldn't give you the opportunity to leave him hanging.
Classes were slower than usual. Fortunately, you had most of them with Jirou, so if you thought that she would drop the incident of the morning, you thought wrong.
"I don't know what's on his mind, but the bright side is that you have the chance to wear a nice dress for once without having to sell your soul to the devil" she said while scribbling some notes. You raised your brow at her, and she gasped. "He's not the devil"
"Since when are you a Bakugo defender?" You asked, leaning on your head on your open hand.
"I'm not his defender is just he's just behaving like a normal human being, acting like a friend, and don't forget he ate that crap the other day, for me that's like the ultimate act of love" she exaggerated.
"I wouldn't go that far," you rolled your eyes at her. "I'm with you on that, except for the latter, but I still think that he has hidden intentions." Jirou titled her head in confusion. "He's used to getting everything he wants, and normally he does, and when I appeared and opened my mouth, everything went downhill for him"
"So you think that he's only using you? For revenge? I don't think he's that wicked. " Jirou bit the tip of his pen giving it a profound thought.
"I don't know"
And for once in your life, you didn't want to know.
The same afternoon, you were at your room with your makeup and hair done. Jirou helped you to look like a decent person, and she also helped you put on your dress without leaving any stains.
"I swear to god, this is gorgeous," she exclaimed.
You admired yourself in the mirror. The fabrics traced the shape of your body in a way that almost made you faint. Growing up in an orphanage, you never had the opportunity of dressing nice. This was the first time that you actually felt like a princess.
Three knocks on the door echoed in the room. You looked at the clock, and you still had a whole fifteen minutes before Bakugo's arrival. Maybe something happened, you wouldn't have the chance to know because you didn't have his number.
You hurried to pick up some jewelry, a pair of golden earrings with a matching necklace that lay on your desk.
"Sensei?" Jirou asked and gave a step back to let Aizawa enter the room. Aizawa looked for you, and when he caught the glimpse of you dressed to the ninens, he was utterly confused.
"What's going on?" He asked slowly.
"I'm going to a party," you said, clicking the earrings to your lobes. You had a few more piercings, so you decided to look for new ones to combine.
"With Bakugo," Jirou chimed in giggling at your death stare.
"What?" Aizawa turned from Jirou to you.
"He asked me to be his plus one to one of his parent's events, no biggie," you said, clasping the back of your necklace while the two of them were talking with glances. "It's not what you are thinking"
"What am I thinking?" He pretended not having understood.
"It's not meet the parents, I swear, I'll just go, eat some boujee shit and look pretty" you shrugged.
Aizawa nodded in acknowledgment and then smiled a bit.
"You do look pretty," he said like a proud dad. "You should send a picture to Eri"
"Why don't I take the picture of the two of you?" Jirou said, excited. "You didn't have any proms, right? This could be the replacement of family photos"
You wouldn't lie. The mere idea of it made you excited, too. You had your best friend and your father figure with you in a moment you never thought you would ever have.
"Fine, but I want you out before Bakugo arrives, I don't want the: bring her in one piece show"
"Oh, don't worry, I'm going to have a serious talk with that boy," he joked.
Or that's what you thought.
Bakugo was ready to pick you thirty minutes before the time he set, so now, he had thirty minutes to pace in his room with his tux on and a lot of thoughts running through his mind.
The palms of his hands were sweating, and he restricted himself to apply more perfume on his collar. He didn't want to provoke you a headache, but he didn't want to smell like caramel either.
He went straight to his car, and although your building was almost in front of his building, he waited in the car, blasting loud music to keep his nerves on the line.
When the clock marked six pm, he made sure to lock his car and, with big steps, made his way to your building, playing with the keys on his fingers he stepped into the elevator and clicked the third floor.
The door of your room opened at the second knock, and Denki's girlfriend was the one on the other side of the wood.
"Are you ready?" She smiled widely, and Bakugo felt the emotions running in his stomach.
"Don't make a fuzz over it"
You appeared in slow motion. Well, that's how he recalls it. He was absolutely right about the dress and the heels. He felt his mouth drying just at the sight of you in front of him. Your makeup was subtle but remarked the main factions of your face. Your eyes were stunning and sparkling, and your mouth highlighted with a subtle shadow of light brown lipstick and gloss on top.
"You -" he stuttered. He cursed himself on his mind for acting like a teenager. "You look beautiful"
You smiled at him, and your cheeks went red in an instant but this time it wasn't for shame, it was purely because of his compliment.
"Let's go," he offered his arm, and you happily clung to it. You needed the balance.
"Have fun!" Jirou screamed from the door when you two walked away from her.
The ride in the car was nice. The spring breeze made you shiver a few times, but he was quick enough to pull the windows up. You thanked him in your mind.
On the other hand, Bakugo was sweating like a pig. He knew he needed to look at the road, but he was so mesmerized by your beauty that he couldn't help staring at you, giving you subtle glances.
He didn't want the ride to be silent, but he didn't know what to say without giving away too much or making a shame of himself.
He was a nervous wreck.
The two of you arrived at the venue with the sun setting on your backs. You had your arm locked on Bakugo's to maintain stability in your heels. With the heels on, he was only half of a head taller than you, so know you could actually see his eyes without killing your neck in the process.
The thematic of the party was classic and luxurious. You weren't wrong about the chandeliers and the champagne because the first thing you saw above your head was an enormous chandelier hanging from the roof, which was very far from the ground and about the champagne, after your mouth almost fell from his junction at the sight of the warm light, a waiter dressed in black waved his tray with multiples flute cups urging you to take one.
Bakugo was kind enough to take two of them and nodded at the waiter, who continued to offer them to the other guests.
Man, you needed at least three of them to just adjust yourself to the atmosphere.
"D'you like it?" He asked, offering the beverage.
"I mean, yeah, it's amazing, and I can't even begin to think the work your parents had to put on this, but I feel like an ant in a shark tank"
He smirked at your comparison.
"You look good," he assured you.
Before you could say anything a tug in your shoulder made you both turn around.
"Who's this?"
The femenine image of Bakugo was in front of you, looking at you with awe and sparkling eyes.
"I thought I'll have enough time to sneak out before bumping into you, mom." he rolled his eyes, and his mom didn't waste time smacking his shoulder with her hand.
"Don't talk to me like that, Katsuki. I'm your goddamn mother, " she flicked his son's forehead and then, like nothing happened, returned to you. "Who are you, darling?"
"She's my friend," Bakugo said before you could open your mouth. He looked constipated like he was trying so hard that you didn't talk.
"Hi, Mrs Bakugo, I'm very pleased to meet you," you said after giving her your name.
"Katsuki, I thought you'll bring your friends, this is a nice surprise." she was genuinely excited. "Are you his girlfriend or his girl-friend?" she waved her arms, stating the comparison with a playful wink that made you blush.
"She's just my friend," Bakugo answered, annoyed. "Where's dad?"
"Oh, he's over there sweeping away the candy table, I swear that man loves too much those little macaroons," she smiled at the sight of her husband. "Anyway, enjoy the party, I hope to see you again, darling," she squeezed your shoulder in her way out.
"She's cool," you said once she was out of sight.
Bakugo snorted and shook his head.
"That's because she doesn't scream at you, c'mon, let me introduce you to my dad" he grabbed your hand this time pulling you through the crowd and you didn't know how to feel about the sudden interaction.
Bakugo's dad was visibly the opposite of his mom. He was quiet, very calm and nice. He asked you about college and about your quirk. The three of you talked about random topics for almost half an hour, and you could tell that Bakugo was more relaxed around his dad than with his mom.
The party began after a speech from both of Bakugo's parents talking about the fashion industry and his own company. The start of it, the challenges they went through in the way of what was today and everything. They thanked their employees, which you found very modest of them, in the best sense of the word.
Then everyone was in their world talking to each other and laughing at the memories they shared. You and Bakugo were leaning in the bar table, asking for something else than champagne. Your tongue wasn't used to refined alcohol.
"Is it always like this?" You asked watching everyone from afar.
"Yeah, the best part is that they only do this twice a year, I need to use the bathroom. Can you stay here and wait for the drinks?" You nodded and gave him a small smile that he gave back.
In his absence, you took the time to look at your phone and replied to Jirou's text since it was just one text you needed to reply to. You started scrolling through the apps and watching stories from your friends. Mina's story appeared just after you accepted on being her friend.
The image of her and Bakugo's friend appeared in an instant. They were hanging together and playing cards in a bar while drinking beer. You felt the champagne in your stomach twirl and made you nauseous.
Why did they tell Bakugo that they were busy?
You were thinking about telling him or not when he appeared and looked above your shoulder.
"What are you doing?" He asked, raising his brow at you.
He didn't give you the time to hide the evidence, so he was very stunned when he watched his friend's story.
"I'm so sorry they lied to you," you said sadly.
His reaction took you by surprise. He wasn't sad or angry. Instead, he was stoic, he standed there thinking and looking at the abyss shuffling the options in his mind.
"It's okay, I didn't invite them," he shrugged and sat on the bar stool, taking the glass of something in his hand.
The look on your face was epic.
"What? But you told me-" you were dumbfounded.
"I know what I told you," he interrupted. "I just didn't want you to say no and I really wanted you to come"
The last time someone was so eager to spend time with you was when you were in charge of the twins, and the couple who adopted them wanted to be by their side all the time.
"Why?" You said confused by his actions.
"I wanted to know you better, like friends do." he wasn't even looking at you, focused completely on sipping from his glass. Yours was in front of you when you realized that it was a Cosmopolitan that you haven't ordered. He remembered.
"Well, I don't know what to say"
"It's okay if you're mad" he mumbled under his breath. He didn't want you to be mad.
"Mad? I'm flattered. I mean, yesterday I was the last option, and now I'm the only option you had in mind since the beginning, " you said toying with your fingers.
You didn't like any sort of lies, but you could understand why he did that. You weren't very open with anyone but your friends so it was very difficult to reach you sometimes. At least he was trying.
"So, do you like to dance, or am I just going to use this dress like a mannequin?" You said batting your long lashes at him.
"Your wishes are my commands, ma'am," he offered his hand, and you took it without hesitating.
"Oh my god, you're so damn cocky"
Your cheeky tone made butterflies erupt in Bakugo's body. That shithead of Kaminari was right. You were absolutely fun to have around.
After a few dances and a lot of drinking, at least for your part, because Bakugo had to drive you back, you were a giant mess. You felt the heat in your body and your feet staring to swell because of the dances. Bakugo was a great dancer, he knew how to sway and how twirl you without leaving you on the ground. You made fun of him multiple times and he took advantage of your state giving you the false sensation that after a spin he would actually drop you.
"I'm a mess right now," you stated the obvious. The drink was way over your head, and it made your legs feel lightweight.
"Yeah, you've stomped in my feet three times," he grinned grabbing you firmly by your waist.
"I'm sorry," you pouted. "I needed to make sure you weren't feeling so confident about your dancing skills. What a bummer! Do you really have to be good at everything? It's exhausting, Bakugo"
The way he laughed at you made you feel whole. He was genuinely laughing, heading back and relaxed shoulder. The whole starting pack of finding you funny.
"Katsuki," he returned to his normal state.
"What?" you asked. Your mind was working slowler than usual.
"You can call me Katsuki after you crushed my feet and almost teared off my arm when you thought you were falling, I think we are okay with first name basis"
Your emotions were in a state of haze. You could blame the alcohol in your veins, but you could also blame the stunning man in front of you, glancing your figure and never letting go of your skin.
He looked as hypnotized as you, but he was more in his right mind to make a subtle move.
Leaning and entering in your space, he took a loose lock of your hair with his fingers and carefully placed it behind your ear, taking the moment to hang in there for a while.
You gulped at the feeling of having him so close.
"I think we should dance one last time before we go," he whispered in your ear.
The slow music played through the speakers. Katsuki grabbed your hand, who was tiny against his big one. He placed the other hand in your waist while yours stayed in his shoulder. The intense look you were sharing gave you enough time to look at his eyes and memorize them. In the warm and fainty light, they looked brighter than other occasions, or maybe it was just because you now were taking your time to really look at them.
Katsuki felt the same way, he sweep your entire face with his eyes while guiding your dance. Your big eyes looked at him like he was the only thing in the world, the tip of your nose little red just as well as your cheeks and your lips, slightly apart and puffy, he wanted to kiss you so bad.
Would you let him? Kiss you?
He wanted to ask, but he was afraid. Bakugo Katsuki was afraid of asking a girl to please let him kiss her?
At that point, he didn't mind begging you to let him taste the sweet of your lips. He was dealing with his own devils inside of his brain. He promised you that his only intention was to be your friend, and now, after a splendid day, his own instincts were about fuck everything up or make it better.
Without even noticing, he started to lean towards you, and you were leaning as well to meet him in the middle. When he realized you were halfway to stamp your lips on his. Your eyes fluttered in between staying open and closed and he sucked his air because it was about to happen.
Ride or die, he thought.
You were inches away from each other when abruptly you shrinked in your position and your eyes snapped open in pain.
Your ankle sabotaged you.
After a little fuzz about it, where the two of you decided to forget the previous situation, you were situated in Katsuki's front seat with the help of his dad and a waiter. Your ankle was getting bigger and bigger and Katsuki couldn't stop looking at it.
"We have to go to emergencies," he stated.
You waved him off, rolling your eyes and internally screaming because of the pain. Damn high heels, you would never use them again.
"It's okay, I'll go to recovery girl tomorrow morning, and she'll do something about it"
That was the main plan. Katsuki felt stupid because with the preoccupation of you in any sort of pain, he forgot that you had all the possibilities with Aizawa being your guardian.
Once you reached your building, he made sure of leaving you safely and tucked in your bed. He even wanted to carry you bridal style to your room, but you adamantly opposed the possibility of being the main gossip of the week.
"Are you sure you don't want me to go with you tomorrow?" He asked for what it seemed the tenth time. Jirou, who was at his back, had a finger lifted for every time he asked that.
"It's okay, Jirou can take me, right?" You said calmly.
"Sure," she faked innocence, hiding his hands behind his back.
"Here, my number." he took your phone from his jacket and put his number on your contacts. "Text me tomorrow, or you'll have me here all day"
God forbid.
"Fine," you smirked. "I had a good time, thank you"
He tucked his hands on his pant's pockets and nodded in agreement.
When the door closed, Jirou watched you with her eyes wide open in amusement.
"I know, don't say anything," you curled up to touch your ankle and see it closely. "This look nasty"
"Girl," she stated, not believing a thing she had just seen.
...
You didn't sleep a wink from the pain. Jirou stayed all night with you icing your entire feet to deflate it, but it didn't work.
The sun was getting up in the sky, and the both of you were tired and sitting in your bed with your backs against the wall.
"Thank god the only class I have today is skippable," she said, yawning.
"Mine is not skippable but I'll make it skippable" you said changing the ice pack to your other hand. "I'll talk to Aizawa"
"Did you asked why he was here yesterday?"
You've forgotten about that.
"No" you shook your head. "I didn't even give it a thought"
She hummed in response and the two of you fell in a comfort silence where you took the chance to close your eyes a little.
"Don't you think you are playing two teams?" Jirou asked while taking the ice pack from your hand and icing your ankle herself.
Her voice startled you less than his ask.
"No," you hissed when she hit a sensitive spot. "I mean, Bakugo invited me to that thing, I said yes, we danced...very close and intimate I'm not going to lie about it and then I sprinted my ankle and now I'm here, what's that of two teams"
"You are practically panicking because of your ankle, I know you have a date with Todoroki, but maybe this is a sign." She said reading your mind.
Todoroki had crossed your mind just once and it was when you started to think in your classes and how you'll go to them in one foot.
"I can't leave him hanging." You said. "Besides, Bakugo invited me as his friend. He asked me to be his friend not a week ago, there no reason to not go to my date tomorrow"
"Fair point," she nodded. "Aren't you betraying yourself with this? Like in that blubbering mess you were last night, you explicitly told me that you felt your stomach doing a flip every time he pressed his hand on your waist"
You blamed the pain and the alcohol.
"If I don't remember, that means it didn't happen." You grinned at her, and she bumped her shoulder at you playfully
Oh, but you did remember, and it brought you mixed feelings that you didn't know how to deal with. With the sun rays of the morning stepping in your room through your curtains you couldn't help but think how fucked you were.
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(Not proofread yet)
End note: I know I made you wait, but the waiting had its purpose. My winter break is over :( and since I've been updating on Wednesdays, I needed to re-schedule this to Fridays. For the wait, this chapter is longer and involves more scenarios and the "date" that I know you didn't see it coming. Bakugo surpassed Todoroki without knowing it! Devil works hard but Bakugo wanting reader works harder.
A penny for your thoughts about this (not really but express yourself)
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starkeyisthelastname · 5 months ago
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It’s Always Been You Chapter One
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Okay.. so here is the first chapter of my first series. Things will get more exciting! Hope you loves enjoy! 🥰 Things are a little different in this universe and don’t necessarily follow the exact OBX plot line. Here is the back plot for anyone who missed!
Back Plot
Rafe is a total dick to other girls, you’ve been warned. 😅
Chapter One:
The girl below him, whose name he couldn’t remember, let out a loud moan as he shoved himself inside her entirely. He pressed her head down into the mattress, telling her to shut the fuck up. He closed his eyes, relishing in the feeling of her cunt as he tried to get a quick nut in that night. It had been a long work week, and tonight he needed a distraction from wanting to go out and get wasted. It was when he was mid stroke that his phone rang on the bedside table. He went to ignore it, but eyes glanced over the caller ID to see it read your name.
“Hey slut, listen to me. Don’t make a fuckin sound when I answer this..” Rafe spat, smacking the girl’s ass hard before sliding his thumb across the screen to answer.
You had plans to go out that night with some friends, but now we’re laying in bed with your makeup done, pajamas on as they had changed their minds, leaving you alone on a Saturday night. As you held your phone up to your ear, you heard the voice of your best friend answer after a few rings.
“What’s up?” He asked, hips not slowing down as he continued to thrust into the girl. “Club doesn’t sound too busy?” He laughed, hearing the sound of a tv in the background.
You were completely oblivious to Rafe having company, and if you did know then you would have probably shut yourself down tonight not wanting to think about all the girls he constantly was fucking that weren’t you. It was your own fault really, but he had been your best friend since before you two knew what that even meant. You couldn’t ruin your lifelong friendship by telling him you’d been in love with him since you both were teenagers.
“The girls changed their minds, don’t ask me why either because I don’t even know.” You laughed, as you were sure it had to do with one of them wanting to see their boyfriend instead. “But… can you come over? I’m bored… and can you bring food?” You asked with a soft giggle. It was when you heard a faint moan in the back, that your heart sank. That wasn’t his tv, and you knew it by the name Rafe being followed. “I-I’m sorry.. I didn’t know you were busy. Um.. just text me later.” You said, clearing your throat as the last thing you wanted was for him to hear the sad tone in your voice. It was best you hang up the call and quickly.
Rafe barely had time to respond, before the call ended. His thrusts completely came to a stop, no longer caring about his nut as he tossed his phone on the bedside table and pulled out. “Get your shit and get the fuck out of my house.” He said, voice cold as he grabbed his sweatpants from the floor. He hated himself for doing this. Meaningless hook ups to avoid how he felt about his best friend, and his anger only grew as he would have completely dropped this whiny bitch to go over to your place in a heart beat.
The girl sat on the bed, frown on her face as she watched Rafe pull the grey sweatpants over his toned hips and grabbed his vape off the dresser to take a hit of. “B- but, I didn’t cum.” She said with a pout, only to earn a mean laugh from the man that had been inside her the only moments before.
“I told you to the shut the fuck up when I was on the phone, think I care that you didn’t get to cum? Better be out of here by the time I get out of the bathroom.” Rafe said causally, walking towards his connected bathroom, not carrying that she mumbled asshole under her breath.
He was an asshole, always had been. That stemmed from some deeper issues that he didn’t talk about often. The only ones who knew about his mental health problems were his family and you, something no random girl would ever understand. He sighed, running a hand through his hair before slamming his fist on the marble counter of the sink. Why was he continuing this torture on himself? Why was he such a pussy about telling you how he felt?
You heard the beep of the alarm, signaling someone had unlocked the front door. There was only a few people who knew the code, your parents, Sarah, Wheezie and Rafe. Walking down the stairs of your townhome, you saw his tall figure stepping in quietly, a bag of food in his hand. You took a sigh, stepping onto the hardwood floor as you looked at him. You wanted to be mad at him, but you couldn’t. There was no reason to be. Right? He was just doing what Rafe Cameron did.
“What are you doing here? I thought you had your little girlfriend over.” You asked, trying to hide the obvious jealousy in your voice. Your fuzzy slippers glided over to where he stood, taking the food sack from him and turning around to head into the living room. You heard him chuckle behind you, but didn’t look back as you plopped yourself onto the couch.
“Not my fucking girlfriend.” Rafe snorted, throwing his keys on the coffee table. “You know I don’t do serious shit.” He said, collapsing down next to you as you pulled the food out from the bag. He didn’t do committed relationships as he was far too busy working at his father’s company, trying his best to become the man he needed to be. In an out of jail, high off blow and after nearly killing someone, he was trying to do right for the people he loved and more importantly himself. The only committed relationship he was willing to be in was with you, that was if he ever manned up enough to tell you.
As you unwrapped your food, you couldn’t help but feel your heart clench at that statement. For as long as you’d known Rafe he’d never dated anyone longer than a month. He was too selfish to be tied down and after everything he had went through during his coke fiend, you knew his focus was work and trying to stay clean. You just wondered if he would ever want anything serious when it came to you.
“And you really thought that bitch was important enough for me to skip coming to hang out with my best friend?” He asked, stealing a fry as he leaned back against the cushion.
Best friend.. and that’s all you would probably would ever be to him. You brushed the thought away, slapping his hand away as he started to reach for another fry. “Why didn’t you just get something if you planned on stealing my food?” You asked with a laugh as he pretended to look hurt that you slapped his hand.
Rafe always seemed to have a stick up his ass for the most part, a brooding look constantly on his handsome face. You knew it was hard for Rafe to let down the wall of being vulnerable, or even his funnier side. You felt lucky that you got to see the side of him that not a lot of people got to experience.
“I just wanted a couple, damn. It’s the least I can get for waiting in that long ass line for some damn chicken strips.” He scoffed, muttering about how the worker was an asshole anyway.
You rolled your eyes, taking a bite of one as he pulled his vape from the pocket of his hoodie to take a hit off. “Please tell me you aren’t gonna complain this much on family vacation.” You said, jokingly, meeting his blue eyes you loved so much as you looked up at him.
Blowing out the cloud of flavorful smoke, he rolled his own eyes before leaning his head back against the couch. “Don’t fucking remind me, that my dad picked fucking Disney World of all places.” He said with a grumble, shuddering at the idea of all the kids he was going to have to be around for 7 days.
It had been a tradition every summer for as long as you could remember that both of your families took a trip together. The first one of this year being Disney World, which you were excited for. Rafe on the other hand would rather go anywhere else than the happiest place on earth.
“Wheezie’s been begging to go for years and we’ve always gone elsewhere. Let your sister be happy.” You said, knowing the thirteen year old hardly got to choose anything that she wanted to do as she was the youngest out of everyone.
“She’s 13. Don’t you think she’s a little old for Mickey Mouse or some bullshit.” Rafe said, eyes traveling back to you. The way you looked so effortlessly beautiful, having washed your face free of makeup. Your hair on top of your head in a messy bun, and cute little set pink pajama set on that hugged those gorgeous curves. He wanted to groan, not only from the thought of leaving for Orlando in a few days but also that he wanted you more than anything he ever wanted in his life. Rafe pretty much got whatever his heart desired, except having you as his girl.
“You are never too old for Disney.” You told him, matter of factly as you continued to eat, completely clueless to the fact his cerulean eyes were bored into you as he watched you.
Rafe let out a small chuckle, shaking his head at the fact you and everyone else seemed to be thrilled about visiting a place he didn’t find so magical. “Are you that excited princess?” He asked, the nickname one you were used to but still felt butterflies when he said it.
Swallowing a bite, you looked up at him to meet his gaze with a nod to your head. Disney was the place where dreams came true and maybe there you would finally have the courage to tell your best friend that you were in love with him.
tag list: @alinavalentine
let me know if you’d like to be tagged! 🌺
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al1fers-haven · 8 months ago
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Adam x Innocent Sinner Reader?
Like, a reader who is a sinner but only because they went to hell on accident or the sin they did was so minor/they were forced into it?
Adam finds them during an extermination and they're just trying to calm down some kids and he's just like "aw, I can't hurt you 🥺"
They totally don't remind him of Eve, totally not
Sorry if that's a bit much >-<
AHH (as much as i hate Adam, they designed him way too good) ; 0 ;
I am so sorry about how long this took and how short it is, Adam is harder to write for since I don't see much of him in the show. but I hope this did well!
Adam x Sinner! reader You hadn't really done much in your life, let alone your death. You tried and tried to stay away from trouble when you were alive. And the only thing you could think of was stealing a couple things as a teenager. But everyone made those little mistakes, right?
The sound of the sinners running around in the streets and screaming was as evident as the smell of blood. The angels flew around the streets and killed many of the inhabitants in the area. You looked back at the group of children behind you, panic flowing through your body as you pushed them back towards the classroom corner, staying as far away from the windows and the door. "M-Ms.L/n. What's going on?" The little girl tugged on your jacket, letting out a sniffle as she hugged onto your leg. Your eyes widened a little as you sighed. Turning around and leaning down in front of her. "Sweetie....you remember how mommy said at the meeting that she was worried about that extermination thing? Yeah! Well- that's happening right now.." The little girl nodded, a couple of the children letting out yelps and screams as the door to the classroom slammed open. A couple of holy-looking beings wearing helmets and masks run into the room. "There! Look at those-" You stood up, shielding the students behind you with your body. The larger demon with a golden face looked towards you, laughing a bit. "You see this shit? Am I seeing this shit, Lute?" One of the exterminators shaking her head no. "You stay away from them! They have done nothing!" Adam looked towards you giggling, letting out a loud groan as he stared at you and the group for a bit. "Fuck! You're making it really hard to kill ya' hottie. Doing this selfless shit in front of me...." He looked you up and down, his heartbeat speeding up as he saw you now. Your bright blue glowing eyes and the more human-like features reminded him a lot of his second wife. Your black hair went down to your waist and you shielding the children reminded him a lot of how Eve had shielded their song, Cain. "Fuck!!" Lute blinked a couple times, looking over Adam's shoulder with a quirked brow. "You...you aren't going to hurt us...?" Your stance weakened a little bit, looking confused as you kept one of the children from looking out. Tears flowed from many of the students. "Awh! No, I could never babe! Damn, I have a soft spot huh? Gotta work on that shit. Hey! Lute! Danger tits, write that down in my log. 'Work on marital problems'." The woman nodded, walking over to the door with a notepad. "What are you doing here? Peter mess up?" Adam walked around you, huffing a little bit as he sent his little angels away. A couple of children walk out from behind you. "Im...I stole a bit. That's all. I'm glad to be here- so I could help these children--" Adam hummed, nodding. seeming not to care that much anymore as he sat in your desk chair. "Yeah- uh-huh. Sure. Okay miss virtue, You got boring. Tell anyone I spared you and I'll be back quicker than you want." He pointed at you, patting one of the children, and walked out of the door yelling for that woman.
"...what the fuck?" You quickly covered your mouth, looking down at the gawking 5-year-olds.
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sophie-hatter-jenkins · 4 months ago
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Tattoo
Written for @jilymicrofics using August prompt no. 26
James and Lily react very differently to teenage Harry's new body art!
890 words, rated T (though I'm being very cautious there, it's probably really Gen)
Read below, or on AO3
“Harry James Potter!” Lily Potter stopped dead in the doorway to her seventeen year old son’s bedroom. “What the hell is that?”
Harry scrabbled into the t-shirt he’d just snagged from his wardrobe and spun around to face his mother. “What is what?” he asked, brows pinched in a convincing imitation of confusion.
“Don’t play dumb with me, Harry!” Lily replied sharply. “I know what I saw.”
Quick as a flash, Harry shifted gears. “Then why are you asking?”
Lily’s eyes narrowed. “If you don’t cut the attitude, we’re going to have a serious problem here.”
“Actually, the problem is that you didn’t knock before barging into my room,” Harry shrugged. “Perhaps we ought to discuss your lack of respect for my privacy?”
“That is NOT the point, Harry!” Lily struggled to keep her temper under control. “We need to talk about this.” 
“No, we don’t,” Harry told her, flatly. “I’m of age now. It’s none of your business.”
“I think you’ll find it’s very much my business while you live under my roof!”
“Really? What happened to ‘my body, my rules’?” countered Harry.
“Harry, that is enough!” she snapped back.
Unsurprisingly, the rising volume of their discussion drew James from his study. “What’s going on?” he enquired. 
“Your son,” she told him, “has got himself a tattoo!”
James’s eyes widened. “Have you really? What did you get? Where is it?” 
“James!” Lily admonished him, though she was silently cursing herself for not anticipating his response.
James’s hazel eyes radiated innocence. “What? I’m only showing a fatherly interest!” He almost managed not to smile as gestured towards Harry. “Well, come on then - show me!”
With a sly grin at his mother, Harry slipped the t-shirt off again and turned around, displaying an intricate line drawing of a dragon that twisted down his left shoulder blade. “It’s a Hungarian Horntail.”
“Oh Harry,” she sighed. “What on earth possessed you?”
Harry looked a bit sheepish. “Erm… Ginny said she thought it would look good.”
“Ginny said…” Lily paused as she tried to wrap her head around this new bombshell. “Harry, you went and got a tattoo because a girl told you to? Of all the idiotic, irresponsible…. James, help me out here!”
“I’m hardly in any position to criticise, am I?” laughed James, lifting his shirt to flash the tattoo that sprawled across his ribs - a bouquet of lilies entwined around their wedding date, just above Harry’s name and his date of birth.
“That’s different!” spluttered Lily. “That means something. You didn’t get it on a whim because a girl said so!”
“No,” he conceded. “But I got the first one on a whim because me and my mates got pissed one night and thought it would be a laugh, which is arguably worse.”
Harry’s eyes lit up, ever eager for stories of his father’s juvenile misbehaviour. “Really? You never told me that.”
“Yeah. The one on my arm,” James explained, referring to the words Mischief Managed that wrapped around his bicep, bordered by a trail of paw and hoof prints. “I was the same age as you are now. Me, Sirius, Remus and Peter all got the same one. Your Nanna hit the roof when she saw it.”
“I can understand why,” muttered Lily.
“I seem to remember you telling me it was sexy the first time you saw it.” James’s lips twitched with amusement and Lily felt her cheeks colour at the memory of exactly what had happened immediately after her then-boyfriend had showed her his new tattoo.
Harry, as sharp as ever, did not miss the double standard. “So you like Dad’s tattoos, but there’s something wrong with mine? You know how ridiculous that is, right?”
Lily was forced to concede that he had a point. “I’m sorry, darling,” she sighed. “It’s just that you’ll always be my baby boy, and I want to protect you. I hate to think of you doing something you’ll regret.”
“But I don’t regret it!” Harry replied, hotly. “How do you know that I ever will?”
Lily held up her hands, placating him. “I don’t. And I don’t think your father has ever regretted any of his.“ 
“Nope,” James confirmed. 
“Then what’s the problem?” Harry hauled his t-shirt back on, clearly frustrated. “I really love it, you know. The dragon was Ginny’s idea, but I’ve wanted a tattoo for ages. I didn’t get it on a whim.”
“Harry, I think you’re perfect just as you are,” she explained, “and the idea of you changing anything about yourself feels uncomfortable to me. But I know that you’re old enough to make your own choices, and despite the impression I just gave you, I do respect that.”
Harry shuffled his feet awkwardly. “Thanks, Mum.”
“For what it’s worth, I do think that it’s a beautiful drawing.” In lieu of an olive branch, Lily held out her arms, and her son obliged her with a hug. “So. What did Ginny think?”
Pink spots formed on Harry’s cheeks. He shoved his hand through his hair, and the familiarity of the gesture, so very like his father, made Lily’s heart swell. “She… um… she liked it.” 
James wiggled his eyebrows suggestively at his son. “Oh, I bet she did.”
Harry flushed an even deeper shade of pink. “Dad!”
Lily laughed. “I like that girl. She has good taste.”
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fairvstairs · 4 months ago
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ANDREIL WITH KIDS!
So I've seen a lot of people say that Neil and Andrew wouldn't be good with kids/wouldn't like them but I think that it's much more complicated than that.
Of course I don't view them as the types to see kids and go "OMG so cute I want to hug them" but I also don't think they would hate them on sight. I have spent my life basically surrounded by children and let me tell you, some of them? They are really little shits. But after all, they are just tiny people, you are gonna find some assholes.
Kids are so much more complicated than people make them out to be and it really pisses me off. They are learning how to be in this world so they basically copy the behavior they see in the people around them, good or bad. They want attention, they want to have fun, they want to be loved, they want to explore and, most importantly, children want to trust.
("I was seven, I believed him.")
They don't understand 'stranger danger' or why someone would want to hurt someone else and some of them manage to become amazing human beings even if they didn't have a good role model.
So I think that if Andrew ever stumbled upon a kid crying his eyes out because he misses his mommy he wouldn't be annoyed. A child feels safe with his parent. What's wrong with that? And Neil looking at a child play, run, laugh, be happy, wondering when all that joy was beat out of him.
And the other foxes' kids? Children with parents that weren't supposed to make it but fought hard as hell to maintain their place in the world when everybody kept trying to steal it from them?
The Foxes know Neil and Andrew, they learn how to behave around them when everybody thinks they are just rude (they still have bad days) and their kids learn too. Especially because I don't think any of them are gonna be strict parents so the little ones understand that when they say "no" they really mean it.
The first years are hard, they do nothing but eat, sleep, cry their lungs out, poop, throw up on everybody and drool while making sounds that Matt swears he understands ("It's their way of communicating!"). Neil doesn't really like being around them, not since a random kid got scared after looking at his face, but his nieces and nephews (don't argue with me on this) grow used to him pretty quickly and really like the texture of his skin, because of the scars. Andrew treats them slightly better than he would any other adult: he doesn't talk much around them but he's always aware of every move they make. He picks them up when no one else is around and plays make-believe with them, he spoils them with sweets ("Andrew! Now he's never gonna go to sleep." "That seems like a you problem.") and often insults their parents.
Things get easier over the years and, before you know it, Neil and Andrew are the go-to for every problem the kids, now teenagers, have. It goes from "Uncle Andrew do you want to help me pick a dress for the prom?" to "I think my friend is in a really dangerous situation at home, what should I do?". The kids slowly become their own people but the foxes never stop protecting them. Every single one of them makes sure that all the kids get to have what they didn't.
I don't think Andrew and Neil would ever have kids of their own but they are bound to retire someday. Maybe Andrew starts to work in child services and maybe Neil becomes a little league coach, it doesn't really matter to them what they do as long as they give these children second chances. Second, third, fourth, whatever, as long as they get at least one more than what anyone else wanted to give them.
-
Not trying to push a "yay kids!" agenda on you but I'm just tired of people hating children for being children. The foxes would be very disappointed.
(If you already saw this, no you didn't)
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brighter-by-the-daly · 1 year ago
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Mary Earps x Reader
Flatmates & Handshakes
Part of the Beth McCarthy mini song series
Friendship Bracelet
I'm not bitter
I'm happy you're happy, it's just
I loved you first
And it's not like it was easy
But we had each other
Now you have another
And I hate it, I hate it
So go ahead and burn my friendship bracelet
Your eyes were locked in, eyebrows furrowed and squinting slightly to assert dominance as you sauntered up to the penalty spot opposite Mary. She had that dirty smirk on her face that she does when she’s trying to intimidate people but that doesn’t work on you - she knew that so you wondered why she’s even trying! You’d been friends for years and became roommates after you both joined Man U but since moving to Barcelona, you’re now on the opposite side of the field. As the ref tried to sort out a ruckus between the players behind, you cemented the spot as yours. Nobody knows you like Mary.. but nobody knows Mary like you either. Endless days of practicing penalties against her probably makes her think she can read you like a book. But you know her tactics too; how she reads body language and positioning, studies every member of a team before a game and has player stats on her water bottle. You noticed she didn’t check it for you though, clearly thinking she had this one in the bag. Since leaving the country for Spain you hadn’t kept in contact at all, she’d unfollowed you on social media and blocked your number. It’s sad but it’s not your fault, she’s the one that ruined the friendship.
From teenagers you’d grown into women together, spending nights holding each other’s hair back over a toilet is where your friendship blossomed after your under 19 games. She was a liability but she was your liability and equally you were hers - always taking it in turns to be the sensible one. As you grew up, both of you realised you wanted to take football more seriously and those nights became few and far between… probably for the best really! Your late nights turned into bleary eyed car rides and sitting on the boot analysing the stars. Sometimes you would catch yourself missing it when you were driving home in the dark by yourself, wondering if she looks at the stars and thinks of you too. Those were the days when days were simple. You had plans to grow old together in the same care home causing havoc everyday but moving in together you soon realised you weren’t compatible as roommates. Well.. it wasn’t Mary that was the problem, she was your platonic soulmate, it was her boyfriend that caused the breakdown in your friendship. Mary’s boyfriend took great offence to the different people you bought home most weekends, he didn’t want Mary around that and for someone who never had a problem with it, she soon took his side over yours. You were young and single, what else was there to do? She used to be like that too until she wanted something better.
You’re not bitter, you just hate the way things were left. It was a huge row fuelled by her boyfriend being home one night when you bought yet another person back to the flat. He lit the spark, making one simple comment then sat back and watched Mary implode; throwing you out along with all of your belongings in the middle of the night. Ripping her friendship bracelet off like you would a wedding ring and throwing it as she slammed the door in your face. Luckily, that’s when Barca approached and just in time to get you out of the WSL and out of the country.
Unfortunately for you though Man U had qualified for the Champion’s League this season which meant playing them and her in the quarter final. There’s nothing you would have loved more than to be benched for this game but you’d really come on leaps and bounds since being at Barca. They’d developed your game into something you could have only dreamed about when you were little and was now a firm starter on the team. Unluckily for Mary, you were their star penalty taker too.
After one misplaced and badly timed tackle caused Geyse to fall to the floor inside the box, a penalty was immediately awarded. The score was currently 1-1 and with not a lot of time left on the clock, this was your time to shine. Mary had the longest clean sheet streak in the WSL and was only a few games away from making women’s football history. You know how much keeping her clean sheet means to her which meant you had to break it. There’s nothing you want more than to rip her streak away from her and rub that smug look off of her face.
You knew she would never expect you to shoot with your left foot, but that’s just one skill you’d picked up in Spain that she didn’t know about yet. Yeah, it’s your weaker foot but it’s your highest chance of getting it past the best goalie in the world - as much as you hated her winning that award, you knew she deserved it. The ref’s whistle hurtled through your ears as you started your run up. Making sure you didn’t give her any inkling of what way you were going until the last possible second. Watching her dive left as you shot right -
GOOOOOAAAAALLLLL!!!!!
Not waiting for the ball to hit the back of the net you ran to the fans, knee sliding into the corner as you were bundled from behind by your teammates. One by one the bodies plucked themselves from you just as they were replaying the goal on the big screen. Looking up to see Mary’s pissed off face projected onto it made you the happiest you’d been in ages, revenge certainly feels sweet!
Confidently taking your time strolling to the middle of the pitch to restart, nothing could wipe the happy little smirk off your face. Touching the ball a few times before the final whistle blew and cementing your team into the championship final. Shaking hands with your old teammates who passed you and chatting to the few who stopped to catch up, you didn’t see Mary approach from behind. Gloved hands grabbed your shoulders and turned your body around to face her, “when did you learn to shoot with your left foot?” her voice sounding annoyed and a little impressed at the same time. “Few months ago, been saving it for a special occasion” you shrugged, not knowing what the reaction would be to your response. “Oh and you thought ruining my streak was a special occasion aih?” her voice animated as she nudged your ribs. “It was the only way I’d get it past the best goalie in the world” a hint of sarcasm in your sentence raised a small one sided smile from your ex best friend. “If anyone was going to ruin it, I’m glad it was you” taking your hand in hers and pulling your chests into each other. Disentangling your limbs you sensed a slight glimmer in both your eyes, wondering if the other remembered your old handshake. A few seconds passed as the situation was assessed by both of you before bursting into amateur dramatics and performing the handshake that was created on your 17th birthday.
Laughing together in the middle of the pitch you stopped suddenly, tilting your head to one side and sighing. “I’ve missed you” taking the first step of admitting the truth about the estranged friendship. Throwing her arm around your shoulders as you walked towards the dugouts, “me too, we’ve got lots to catch up on” Mary smiled disappearing up the tunnel together, loud giggling echoing off the metal walls.
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mwahccxoxo · 12 days ago
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𝕋𝕪𝕡𝕙𝕝𝕠𝕥𝕚𝕔
↪︎ Tanjiro never made it to Genya on time, causing the boy to lose his sight from his own older brother. Sanemi finally got his wish of Genya quitting the corps, but now he had to live with the fact that his baby brother was living alone in a shitty hut while struggling through everyday tasks and on a tight budget
Part 1
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Genya woke up to the birds chirping, but to a pitch black vision. He reached out to the side of his bed, finding the blindfold he was searching for before tying it around his eyes.
He didn’t want to do it. It was too much of a hassle to search for it amongst everything he had on his messy nightside table, but even though he could clean up, he couldn’t since that was now how he navigated life and reorganising everything would be too much of a hassle to get used to. No one wanted to see his empty eye sockets anyways.
He slowly got out of bed, carefully trying to find his walking stick.
He hated how dependent he was. Himejima was blind himself, but he didn’t need anything to get to places. He could go from one place to a new place with ease like he never lost his vision.
Unlike Genya. He needed his walking stick to navigate through his own house.
Food was a bit of a problem. He had given his hand a nasty burn once when he tried to cook, which resulted in him eating just fruits, bread, and anything which didn’t need to be cooked to be consumed.
He felt the air blow past his face as he sighed, facing the open window.
He wished to see the sun and sky again. The way the clouds looked so flawless just by floating, the way he would often see his kasugai crow fly with the other crows, just enjoying themselves when there were no attacks.
He missed the moon and stars, his only company when he trained in the dead of night when he trained till his muscles tensed so hard that it became hard for him to even move a small step just so he could be a hashira and make his brother proud.
Brother… Sanemi…
Genya shook his head to get rid of the thoughts, not wanting to think about him much longer.
He reached up to feel for his cabinet as he opened it, searching around for some berries or literally anything he had. He got a hold of some grapes which he happily had as his breakfast. He was a blind teenager who lived alone with no job or income anymore since he quit the corps, so having slightly mouldy grapes was the least of his problems.
He knew he had to go shopping anyway. Tanjiro’s crow had flown to him the other day to inform that him and the others would be visiting.
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“Hey, hey! Stop causing a ruckus!” Genya yelled while laughing when he heard Inosuke go through all his stuff while cackling.
“Inosuke! Genya organised everything for himself! Don’t ruin it all!” Tanjiro tried to stop him while desperately trying to put everything back.
Genya sat on his bed, chuckling. He enjoyed the noise which he once used to hate. It felt nice to finally have some company over to fill the quiet loneliness of his house. He felt a small shift on his side.
“So…” Zenitsu sat down next to him. “How are you doing?”
“Pretty okay, not going to lie. Himejima-san’s senses are really sharp which is why he is able to navigate and train despite being blind, so I guess that’s why I can sort of do the same. Does that make sense?”
“I mean… I guess?” Zenitsu chuckled. “But damn. This place is actually not too shabby. Heard you found it after you quit the corps.”
“Yeah. I got some help from the other slayers we were training with.”
The only sounds heard were Tanjiro trying to stop Inosuke from causing further mayhem to his house. Genya didn't mind at all.
“What about your brother?” Zenitsu broke the silence.
He knew he fucked up when he heard Genya’s breathing hitch ever so slightly as his small smile faded.
“Dead.” Genya replied. “My brother is dead.”
That was enough for Tanjiro and Inosuke to both stop.
“Hah?!” Inosuke scoffed. “Nonsense! That hashira guy is still alive! What kind of-”
Tanjiro managed to clasp his hand around Inosuke’s mouth by quickly removing his boar head.
“Uhm- Genya… I think you were misinformed? Shinazugawa-san returned from his last mission safely.”
“Doesn’t matter. My older brother is dead.”
From the eerie silence, Genya knew the others wanted an explanation. The proper explanation from his side.
“My mother got turned into a demon when I was a kid. Killed all my younger siblings when my older brother went out to search for her. She almost killed me as well, but he managed to push her out of the way before she could. He had a butcher’s knife. I watched him kill our mother until sunrise… before he also died.”
He sighed.
“That man is not my brother. My brother was nice. That man is not. He’s something – like a spirit. Something worse than a demon, who took control of my brother’s corpse. That man is not my brother, and never will be.”
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Sanemi followed behind the trio, his steps quiet.
“Caw! Continue west!” the kasugai crow shouted in its regular gruff voice, sitting on a branch to quickly peck its wing before getting back to the sky.
Sanemi looked up from his feet, looking at the back of Tanjiro’s head as he clenched his fists.
He hated him. He knew he shouldn’t really because Tanjiro was a strong and genuinely kind kid who did his best, but he resented him. If only Tanjiro had been faster, he would’ve reached Genya in time to push him out the way.
He also hated Genya for forgiving Tanjiro so easily. He knew he himself wasn’t the best and that he was far worse, but still.
“I’ll stay outside.” Sanemi mumbled. “You three go in and talk to him. I’ll stay out and just… listen.”
“Eh? But Mr. Shinazugawa, I think Genya would be really happy to see you-” Tanjiro quickly cut himself off, realising his mistake when Zenitsu pinched his arm. “I mean-!”
“No, no. Save it. I’ll stay outside.”
“Okay…”
Oh, how much Sanemi wished he was also inside. He couldn’t help the smile which graced his lips when he heard the pure joy in Genya’s voice when his friends talked to him.
He was glad that Genya had friends he could trust. He looked around the area and the house.
It was a bit shabby, and in a somewhat open space. He wondered if he should quietly plant wisteria trees, but it would be impossible without Genya accidentally crushing them since he wouldn’t know about them.
Another small perk was that Genya wasn’t too far. About an hour away by walking, Sanemi was sure he would reach Genya pretty quickly if he ran at top speed.
Looking around a little more, he was thinking about how to subtly strengthen the house a bit more. Probably by adding some extra pillars little by little, but Genya was sharp. He would know something was off. Maybe he could silently and anonymously get a villager to deliver money to Genya every once in a while so he didn’t really have to worry about finances. He had a lot of money anyways, so sending some everyday wouldn’t hurt his savings. Around 10,000 yen would–
“Dead. My brother is dead.”
Sanemi froze on his spot. It was okay, right? He was probably talking about their younger siblings. Genya couldn’t possibly mean Sanemi. He was right outside. He had returned from his mission safely and Genya was probably misinformed. He loved his brother, right?
Sanemi could barely hear the world. He never expected such simple words would shatter him so bad, especially knowing who said it.
He had probably said worse to Genya, though. He had also blinded him, so he sort of understood why Genya would technically think so. It still hurt so bad especially since Genya ended up bottling his feelings, walking around with the painful weight of his brother’s cruel words but still managing his pure smile.
“That man is not my brother. My brother was nice. That man is not. He’s something – like a spirit. Something worse than a demon, who took control of my brother’s corpse. That man is not my brother, and never will be.”
Sanemi slowly stood up and walked away.
By the time the three left Genya’s house, they were confused on where he had gone, but didn’t really question it much.
Zenitsu, however, couldn’t shake off that quiet and distant sound of crying he could hear echoing through the trees.
Sanemi looked at himself in the mirror that night. His eyes were puffy, the tip of his nose red, and his body littered with scars. The fact that his hair was white didn’t matter, because the longer Sanemi stared at himself, the more he realised he looked like a carbon copy of his father.
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gravelsong · 8 months ago
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I call this the "what if I overanalyzed the HELL out of the Arcee and Carly interaction" post because this scene was really good
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Before this, the ONLY time we've really seen them interact is when Arcee saved Carly from falling. They're still on unfamiliar terms, probably only knowing each other through name. Arcee's come over to see Carly, being curious about her, wondering what she's doing, or both. Carly clearly doesn't give a shit though, responding in a very short, and clipped answer.
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Okay, so she doesn't seem to be that thrilled about Arcee being over there. That's okay, Arcee will simply ask what Carly's doing instead of beating around the bush, which Carly ALSO responds to with a short, sarcastic answer. Her answer doesn't really help Arcee work out what's going on all that much, so she asks for further elaboration, both wanting to know more and also learn something new about Earth.
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Carly gives another vague answer ("gotta start somewhere") so Arcee offers to join her in her activity, maybe hoping that they can connect more and she can learn further about what's on Carly's mind. However, Arcee's blaster causes a solid amount of damage, but it seems to catch Carly's attention and even makes her smile, impressed with the sight.
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With Carly seeming more open, Arcee talks a bit about her own skills, her own history with weaponry. She IS a very impressive shot, as vouched by Optimus, but with her time spent fighting in the war, she's mournful over this, as her skill with a blaster adds to the carnage and horror she's seen (the flames in the background serving as a reflection of her memories, what she's witnessed through her talent).
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Carly, who just recently lost her father to Starscream, is baffled by this statement, saying that Arcee's skill would REALLY help with killing decepticons (as she seems to have missed the point with what Arcee was trying to say). Carly even specifies Starscream, which makes it clear that she's practicing specifically for revenge purposes against Starscream (great news Carly, Soundwave already took care of that problem). Arcee recognizes this desire for revenge, and states her thoughts clearer: that she can see how Carly's falling to her rage, that her hurt is driving her to future pain (with Arcee probably reflecting on her familiarity with her own hatred).
Unfortunately, Carly is no longer open to listening, switching back into being angry and annoyed. She knows that Arcee's analyzing her, thinking that she knows better than her (also Carly is a teenager, and hurt teenagers tend to shut themselves off to focus on what they think is best for them). The remains of Arcee's shot also look like a burning inferno behind Carly, used as symbolism for her own feelings, her own rage.
("I apologize. It's just... you remind me of myself, when my gears were beginning to turn. I had a teacher then.")
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Arcee isn't using subtle dialogue or small talk anymore, she's outright telling Carly of her own history, of how she was the same way. Of how she had someone she loved and trusted so dearly, but he died (ALSO MAGNUS IS DEAD AUGHH) because she allowed her hatred to control her. She was so focused on revenge, she lost another loved one. Even now, Arcee's reflection on her journey of healing is that her hate costed her far more than helped her. It's a painful memory for her, and she doesn't want to see someone else go down the same path she did.
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But she's too caught up in her desire for revenge to really hear what Arcee's telling her.
Hell, even in the scene afterward, Cliffjumper is berating himself for not killing Starscream, and that Carly isn't even speaking to him anymore because he couldn't kill Starscream. Jazz tells him that there's no shame in pulling the trigger, but if that was true, then why does he feel so awful (he feels awful because he feels like he hurt Carly right there and then. Also, Starscream immediately grabbed her, and would've killed her if he hadn't been crushed. Cliffjumper is feeling guilty over not taking the shot because it could've killed Carly, and even though she survived, a part of her was still killed in that moment.)
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romanarose · 4 months ago
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About a Girl: Epilogue
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Beautiful header by my beloved @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog
Joel Miller x Trans!Fem!Reader (Nickname, Blue)
Series Masterlist : The Last of Us Masterlist : Full Masterlist
Summary: Blue sets up her future in Joel's life, step by step by step
Warnings for whole fic, not chapter by chapter: 18+ ONLY!! I cannot warn against everything, but these are major themes. Joel is a lil ignorant but not out of hate. He just doesn't know. He's trying his best. There will be smut. Penetrative sex, all of the anal play, oral. There will be transphobia from other people. Addiction and alcoholism. QUICK child neglect not by Joel but I promise, Sarah is fine and is having a great time in life. Fetishization of women attracted to women by a shitty guy. Will update as needed. Again, this is adult content. Expect adult content.
Immersivity: Reader is transgender, AMAB female, reader has had gotten bottom surgery, not top, and is on hormones. reader has visible hair and a blue streak in hair, but not described. Could be braids, could be natural hair, whatever. Header is for aesthetics only. Reader is about Joel and Tommy's height. Let me know if i miss anything!
TAGS HAVE BEEN SHITTY make sure you're caught up!!
TRANS LIVES MATTER! TRANS YOUTH MATTER! TRANS ELDERLY MATTER! TRANS WOMEN MATTER! TRANS MEN MATTER! NON BINARY TRANS MATTER!
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9 years later.
Life was good. Really fucking good.
You had two teenagers which was… fucking insane, honestly. Sarah and Ellie were close as two almost-twins could get, and often fought like it too. Nothing nasty or mean spirited, just so clearly sister stuff like Ellie using Sarah’s deodorant or Sarah taking Ellie’s coat. They’d fight and yell and Joel would tell them to knock it off before they stormed off. An hour later Ellie would say hey, the bachelor is on, wanna watch? Or Sarah would throw hot cheettos at Ellie and they’d be back to normal.
Tommy had been mostly sober for 5 years, his longest stretch yet. It was looking up, even after a few close calls. There had been a night or two Tommy had called Joel, close to relapse, but being the good brother he was Joel was always there. After a few years at his own apartment, Tommy had suffered a pretty bad near-relapse on hard drugs. He broke his 3 years sobriety on alcohol and called Joel one night crying while he was watching The Late Late Show, Sarah and Ellie up past their bedtimes one summer. 
“Tommy? What’s going on, man?” Joel stands up from the couch, already moving to get his shows as Ellie mutes Craig Furegson. Everyone is quiet as Joel listens. “I’ll be right there, man, don’t worry. Nah, it ain’t a problem at all, Tommy, Blue’s here with the girls.”
Joel stayed with a drunk Tommy all night, holding him, putting on shows, ordering pizza, playing card games, anything it took to keep Tommy from calling up his old dealer.
In the morning, Joel brought him home to sleep. It was the summer, so you were off and could watch Tommy while Joel went to work, Tommy using a sick day at the farm and Joel and Tess hustling extra hard to make up for it. It didn’t matter, because it was Tommy, and they’d do anything for him.
When he put Tommy asleep on the couch, Ellie and Sarah asked to talk to you and Blue, pulling you into Ellie’s room.
Ellie steepled her hands, looking like an evil villain in a made-for-tv-movie. “We have a proposition for you.”
“You’re not getting your nose pierced-”
“Joel.” You chastise.
“Sorry El, what is it.”
Ellie looks to Sarah, urging her on.
“We think uncle Tommy should move in with us again. We love him, and it worries us that he’s had to call you so much recently.”
You can see Joel close his eyes, the wrinkles around his face compounding. He was getting older, as were you, and you loved every single wrinkles and gray and pop of his knees. You speak before he does, knowing your husband is tired.
“I’m sorry, girls. We never wanted Tommy’s issues to effect you.”
Sarah: “We knew there were problems, even when we were young. It’s hard not to notice, you couldn’t have hid that unless he was never around, and we wouldn’t have wanted that.”
“Besides, mom.” Ellie adds. “We’re teenagers now. 13 and 14 are practically adults!”
Joel shakes his head. “Ain’t right to be worry’n about that at your age.”
“Well, you don’t need to worry about every single thing all the time, and yet you do anyway, so it’s even!”
You crack a smile, Ellie, despite no blood relation at all, had taken after you, while Sarah reminded you a lot like her godmother, Talia, mixed with some of her dad. Ellie was agreat kid, even as she entered her teens, she remained steadfast. There was a… slight issue with her getting in fights in school, but when they talked to the principal, there was always a reason you thought made sense, even if the school was displeased. Once, some girl called Sarah a slur. Another time, a boy was bullying a disabled kid. They found out Ellie was gay after the incident where she punched a kid for pushing a boys head in a toilet for being gay.
By this point, coming out wasn’t a nerve wracking thing in your family for Ellie. You and Joel had made it very clear that they had nothing to worry about, and that much was obvious by the people in the girls' lives; Bill and Frank still employed Tommy Tess and Joel and had an active part in the girls' lives even though they could stay home during harvest now. Talia and Tess were their beloved aunts. Sarah was very close to Talia, bonding over hours of doing hair. Ellie and Tess clicked right now, both tomboys, but both girls loved both aunts. 
And of course there was Tommy. When Tommy came out, it began a long struggle of keeping him out of the closet. He switched from gay, bisexual, then insisting he was straight over and over again whenever he went through some identity crisis, or when he reconnected with military friends, or he heard of some hate crime. No girlfriend, no boyfriend, just a cycle of hook ups to keep him distracted.
The girls loved their uncle, Sarah in particular was attached at the hip to him, and it hurt her when he was hurting. You and Joel had tried to protect her, but she was an intuitive girl.
And then, there was you. You had wanted to wait until the girls were a little older to explain things to them, but they went to school in the same district you had taught in. a friend of Sarah’s suddenly wasn’t allowed to play at your home anymore, and soon a rumor went around school that you were born a man. Sarah came home crying one day when she was 12, and you didn’t want to lie to her. You and Joel sat Ellie and her down and explained it to them as best you could for their age. There weren't any handbooks for this sort of thing. 
There was a moment, a brief moment of worry in your head. The echo of Kayla’s voice telling you Sarah wouldn’t love you when she found out. But Kayla didn’t know Sarah. She’d probably seen Sarah three time since the day you confronted her for hurting Joel, and then disappeared. The only time you heard from her after that was when she sent back the papers, signed, relinquishing her parental rights so you could adopt Sarah. She enclosed a $50 check, and although Joel had told her that she could still see Sarah as long as Sarah agreed, you haven't heard from her since. 
At ages 11 for Ellie and 10 for Sarah, you held your daughters in the courthouse as they were legally adopted.
Now, you stood in the upstairs of the home you shared with your daughters and your husband as they showed you just the kind of young ladies they’d grown into.
Joel shook his head. “Thank you, girls, but we ain’t got room here. He’ll stay on the couch for a few days, but I don’t think he’d wanna stay there for more than that.”
After a bad night, Tommy stayed for a little bit. Joel said couch, but sometimes you took the couch so Tommy could sleep in the bed with Joel if he really was in a bad way. You loved Tommy like a brother, you and him getting close in the nearly year you both lived with Tess and Talia. 
Sarah and Ellie looked at each other, and Sarah spoke. “We decided we’d combine our rooms. Ellie will come sleep with me, and Uncle Tommy could have his old room back.”
You immediately felt your eyes watering, realizing how good your children had become, how much like their father they’d grown into. This is Joel’s call. “Girls, no, I don’t want y’all making these sacrifices-”
“Uncle Tommy raised me. And, no offense, but he’s my favorite person.” She said with a smile. “We want to.” And Ellie agreed.
Joel was still declining, but wavering. “I- thats very nice but if he were to move it, we’d have to commit to a year, maybe two, I don’t know…”
Ellie spoke now. “We think it would be best if he stayed for a while. We’re prepared to commit to this through high school. We wanna do this dad.” Her sincerity struck you, a young woman grown up right before your eyes. 
You turn to Joel.  “Baby… I think it might be a good idea…” When you turn to look at your husband, he has a tear rolling down his face and his chest breathing heavily. 
“Babygirls.” Joel’s voice warbled. “I love you, so much.”
When Tommy was sober and the worst of his hangove was done, you spoke to him.
2 months later he was moved into Ellie’s old room where he’s been the last year.
*
It’d been a year since that morning, and things were better than ever.
Tommy was sober, the girls were happy, you and Joel were happy, and everyone had driven out to Austin to celebrate Ellie’s first pride.
“Whatya think, kiddo?” Frank asked, clapping her back softly with his hand.
Ellie smiled widely, taking in everything around her.  “Pretty fucking cool!”
“Language.” Her dad chastised, earning a nudge from you. He continued. “Don’t be wonder’n off girls, it ain’t safe-”
You decide to tease him, being the only none LGBT person here, other than Sarah, although at 13 there was no reason she needed to commit either way. 
“Oh, so because almost everyone here is gay, it’s inherently more dangerous? Okay Joel.”
But Joel was not to be fooled when you’ve been playing this game for ten years. “Nice try baby…” He paused for a moment before adding, “You know it’s because the city makes me nervous, right? Not because-”
“I know, Joely” You pinch his butt, making Tess behind you gag, as if she hadn’t gotten a grab of a few Miller buttcheeks back before getting married. Well, legally recognized in the State of Massachutis, and not in the other 49.
“What about him?” Ellie asks loudly, pointing to a guy and nudging her uncle. “He looks like he could teach you better spanish.”
Tommy flicked her. “Don’t fuck’n point, shit head.” He ignored Joel’s tired reminder for language. Tommy is where she picked up the habit. “And just because he’s got brown skin doesn’t mean he speaks spanish.”
Ellie looked to Sarah. Sarah’s eyes said no. Ellie’s impulse control said yes. “Hey! You!” Ellie shouts to the man while everyone around her tries to stop her. Poor guy was just trying to get a hot dog.
“Hey?” He looked confused but not unkind as she walked fearlessly too him. He was a little taller than her dad, not by much, dark curls sticking to his head with sweat. It wasn’t even noon yet, but June in Austen could kill. 
Joel is calling Ellie’s name, pulling on her arm but she turns to him, looking up. “Let me do this or I will start screaming stranger danger.” Joel let go, but facepalmed, staying right next to her none the less. “You speak spanish?” She asked the man, thumbing towards Tommy. “My unce here is looking to brush up.” Double Miller facepalm.
“Uhhhhh, no, but I can get by in Hindi.” He looked to Tommy with a grin. “I can impress some desi MILFs, if that’s your goal.”
Tommy swooped in slinging Ellie over his shoulder as she shouted ‘hey!’ and began backing away. “Don’t listen to her, she’s- I swear we’re not racist- I told her not to assume- listen, she knows like, no white people- I’m Mexican!” He nervous rambled, Ellie over his shoulder telling him he’s floundering.
The man just laughed. “Hey, it’s alright, man. Don’t worry about it.”
Tommy mouthed ‘I’m sorry’ and turned around. Now facing the stranger, Ellie frantically motioned toward Tommy to him, pointing and drawing hearts in the air.
*
After running into him and embarrassing Tommy a few more times, Ellie and Sarah got his business card. Jake and Tommy have talked every day since.
That night, the girls sound asleep in their room, Tommy on the phone with Jake, you keep your hand wrapped tight around your husband's cock. You were tired, not wanting to get up to any antics but you definitely wanted to make your husband cum. He deserved an orgasm for dealing with crowds of strange people in a big city, constantly alert for his daughters, Tommy, Tess, Talia, you, and even Frank. Him and Bill were the same in that aspect, always keeping an eye on theirs, protecting the good people in this world. You suspected Bill was getting the same treatment on the farm right now. Well, almost. Bill didn’t strike you as the type to put up with edging.
“There you go baby, there you go… so close, so close… ah! Not yet!” You squeeze at the base of Joel’s cock, staving off his orgasm a third time. Oh, you were a tease.
“Blue, come ooooon!” He whines, fingers gripping the sheets so hard one corner was already pulled off the bed. “This ain’t fair.”
You begin to stroke him again, his hard and thick cock not allowing for you fingers to close around it, thick and juicy and oh-so mouth watering. 
“Ooooh poor baby boy. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’ll stop.” You lied
“You always- ooohhh shit” Joel moans out for you, you love seeing your big tough man reduced to a whimpering puddle just from a little bit of edging. “You always say that, Blue”
Still, you laugh, your hand moving up and down on his cock as Joel begin to buck his hips into your fist. Silly boy, he thinks if he can reach his high faster, you’ll let him have it. “I know, I’m a meany meany.” You pinch his orgasm off again, giggling when he whispers a harsh-
“Fuck!” 
“Aht, aht, aht!” You continue to tease, spitting on his already over stimulated cock before playing with him more. “Language!” You reference his police of Ellie and Tommy.
Joel flops his head on the pillow. Your little pillow princess. “Oh I see. Y-your-” His words are cut off hummed whimper, his cute little feet wiggling. “You're punishing me for being annoying today?” He chuckles a little, knowing it’s all in fun.
You kiss his forehead. “Not one bit, baby. You’re my perfect man, and I want you to come. Go ahead Joel, come for me.” You pump him as the love of your life groans, covering your hand and his stomach in cum.
Once cleaned and in PJ’s, ready to sleep the fuck in on sunday, you assume your position behind him, wrapping your arms around his wide middle, getting a little wider every year, and kiss his scruffy neck. “Thank you for all you do for our family, baby.”
“Ain’t no thing.”
“But it is.” You coax him to look at you, his eyes wide and brown and beautiful. “I can’t imagine what my life would have been like if I had parents as supportive as you, loved me so unconditionally.” Things with your parents were pretty good now, they were. As well as you supposed it could get. They loved Sarah and Ellie and visited a few times a year, as you did them. Reconciling was more about giving grandparents to those girls they wouldn’t have otherwise. The day you met Joel, he said he hates his birthday, and that never changed. Years later, he’ll have a cake and accepts gifts, but it’s mostly for his girls. You found out his dad died on his birthday, leaving him without any parents. “Things would be so different. I wouldn’t have gone through addiction, I could have started hormones earlier and maybe I’d look-”
“Blue.” Joel turned over to cup your face. “There ain’t nothing wrong with the way you look. You’re my beautiful wife, and thats that.”
You smile at him. “Thank you, baby. But I mean it. I love that we can provide a different environment for Ellie to come out in.”
“I am too, mi amor.” He smiles back, and you lay your head on his chest. 
You wore his old flannel that night. It felt like home.
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Wow, its been a ride!!
I know this series was small but im so thankful for everyone who read it and supported me!!!!
I hope somewhere out there, a transwoman reads this and feels seen <3 you are valued, you are important, you are loved
I love blue and I love the little word here, the found family Joel has gained over the years!!!! Now Jake enters the picture!
If you have any questions about this world, loose ends you didnt think i tied up or you have any additional q's of any kind, comment, reblog, or send an ask! Im happy to answer!
I love you all so much!
Please consider making a small donation to The Trevor Project <3
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billiuspendragon · 2 months ago
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My Saiki K Sims Lore
I'm gonna tell you all about the lore in my little Saiki K universe on the sims because absolutely no-one asked but I'm sure you're all dying to know.
Warning: long.
Aiura and Kaido have been in a committed relationship since they were teenagers. They have been constantly loyal and are now engaged, though Aiura is now having a mid-life crisis and flirted with some people at her bachelorette party -- but that was just a one-time thing! I think their relationship has been going on long enough that it will be fine.
Info: Aiura has been a witch from birth. Kaido was born human, but was bitten by a werewolf as a teenager. It was like a dream come true for him. Since then he has bitten Satou Hiroshi, disrupting his normalcy and turning him into a werewolf too!
Nendou and Teruhashi are exes, on good terms. They dated as teenagers and went to a prom together. It was a sweet and wholesome relationship, but eventually Kokomi realised while dancing with Aiura that her interests lay a different way, so she broke up with him.
Oh, by the way, that happened while Saiki was dead. He died in a tragic accident (or was it an accident...?) while trying to fix the TV. (Was the TV sabotaged electrocute him on purpose by a certain scientist? Who knows!) Anyway, the other characters worked tirelessly to bring him back, with Kokomi and Kusuke taking up gardening so they could grow the precious life fruit, Nendou learning fishing to catch the death fish, and Akechi mastering the cooking skill so he could make ambrosia.
While everyone was learning their skills, Nendou visited the graveyard whenever he could to talk to his best friend's ghost. On one, tear-jerking occasion, he kept the ghost-saiki in conversation for as long as possible in a fruitless attempt to keep him from returning to the netherworld, even as the sun rose.
His nighttime escapades to the graveyard landed him in trouble with the police many times, but that didn't stop Nendou. He kept on going again and again, until he aged up into an adult and it wasn't a problem anymore (only teens and kids get in trouble for being out after curfew).
Eventually, the ambrosia was made. Unfortunately, Ghost!Saiki chose this moment to be a really fussy eater and fucking SPURNED it, even though it was PERFECT quality -- but eventually he got it down and came back to life! It was a beautiful moment, with all his friends crowding around him and telling him all he had missed. Saiki was very surprised to learn that Kaido was a werewolf -- in fact, he fainted when he saw him transform. Poor Saiki.
Ever since then, Saiki has had sever memory issues (it must be a glitch in the game). Every time he visits the park, he makes a memory as if it's his first time going outside, and the memory fades after a day or so. He can sustain relationships, but can he remember how he got into those relationships? Not a chance. He and Kuboyasu are currently dating, but Saiki does not remember meeting him or getting together with him. And they argue a lot. It's not a great relationship honestly, but maybe it'll get better...?
Chiyo, Hairo, Suzimiya, Aren and Satou all live in a separate house together, and they all hate Akechi. One time he visited them and took a little nap on their sofa and they all came downstairs to shout at him at once because apparently he wasn't supposed to do that. Then he tried to make them breakfast as an apology and they shouted at him again!!!!!!
At one point Saiki got abducted by aliens but nothing really came out of it. Usually alien abductions result in mpreg but apparently Saiki said "no thank u" which is perfectly fair enough honestly. It was just a little adventure for him. The Disastrous Alien Abduction of Saiki K.
Kokomi is in a happy relationship with Suzimiya Hii. I don't know what it is about her, but they clicked as soon as they met.
Akechi and Kusuke are exes, on BAD terms. They had a lot of wacky little dates at first, and it was all fun and games, but then Kusuke had a mid-life crisis and started cheating. With multiple people. Akechi was very upset when he found out -- it really wasn't pretty. One of the people Kusuke had a fling with is called Brain Burger (not Brian, BRAIN) and he's the cleaner for the house, which is a bit awkward. Brain is also a total weirdo -- one time he literally just got into bed with Kokomi while she was sleeping. Like dude, boundaries????? I think I should probably fire him. I couldn't do so at the time because he wasn't on duty -- all I could do was ask him to leave.
Kokomi and Aiura are very close friends. They're the kind of besties who flirt with each other and slow dance sometimes but never in a serious way, you know? Just gals being pals.
Nendou and Kusuke became enemies basically as soon as they started talking, but that was many years ago and I don't think they mind each other now. Kusuo and Kusuke on the other hand, are "old enemies". The hatred might not be fresh, but it is still damn well there.
Kusuke's complicated. He mayyy have had a hand in Saiki's untimely death but he also worked extremely hard to bring him back. Don't know what happens in that man's head (I say, as though I'm not the one orchestrating this whole thing) It's funny because Akechi also had a hand in his death, though I'm sure he didn't mean it. For an electrical appliance to electrocute someone on the sims there must first be a puddle of water on the floor.
They all (Aiura, Kaido, Nendou, Akechi, Kusuke, Kokomi and Kusuo) live in a giant mansion together, though Kusuo has his own mini house outside (he needs his personal space) with a kitchen and a bedroom, and he just spends all his days in there watching cooking shows on the TV. Kusuke Saiki also has a cat called "Bitch" who is grey and has no tail. Don't let the name deceive you; Kusuke loves him very much. They are best friends.
Nendou's lifetime wish is to adopt a unicorn, but he's only seen wild horses so far, and none of them have let him pet them.
aaaand I think that's all the important stuff. I'm more invested in this world than I have been for any other Sims game. I'm gonna stay with these guys until they all die of old age. I'm planning to have Aiura and Kaido have a kid soon so there can be another generation to play after they're gone </3
!Oh! Another interesting thing:
Since I made Teruhashi a fairy (I thought it was fitting for her) her lifetime is about three times longer than all the others. While they're all dying of old age, she's still gonna be a young adult. Even Saiki, who is a genie, doesn't have this extra long lifespan. I didn't realise this while I was making them, but it's gonna be interesting.
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turtlevariabilis · 8 months ago
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My story with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
[Español]
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When I graduated from preschool, I was gifted the class pet: a red-eared slider turtle (now almost 20 years old and even has a similar companion). From that moment on, turtles have become part of my identity. If someone asked me about my favorite animal, of course I would say turtles. They are very interesting animals that do interact with each other and with humans; they have an enviable perseverance, enormous curiosity, and ninja-like abilities (they are fast, silent, and enjoy climbing, to throw themselves and performing some really strange acrobatics).
Well, today I'd rather tell you my story with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and how I came to be part of this fandom. It's actually a somewhat long story, but it has some funny details, and it's a way for you to get to know me a little better.
So, since turtles have always been a part of my life, it should have been natural for me to encounter the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles from a very young age, so I got to know them through the tmnt 2003 version. And yes, of course, they appeared on television and I was curious about protagonists being turtles... but the series didn't resonate with me.
When you're young, what you need are stories that you can somehow identify with, which is why the best stories will always be the ones that are most diverse in every possible way. And of course, any version of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is already a statement towards accepting what's different, promoting diversity. But this wasn't enough for me back then.
I was a girl who wanted to see girly things, shows with interesting female characters. And honestly, from what little I had seen of tmnt 2003 (maybe just a few scenes from an episode), I only spotted male characters except for April, who was an adult (so I preferred to watch Teen Titans). However, I already had my favorite turtle identified: the one with the purple mask, simply because it was my favorite color; funny how that hasn't changed.
When I was almost the age of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the tmnt 2012 series premiered on Nickelodeon. It didn't catch my attention either. However, my sister L, almost three years younger than me, insisted that I watch it. So I did... and I guess I loved it. Because that's how my story with the Ninja Turtles began. That's how I met them.
My sister L and I were always on the lookout for when the series aired on TV; we literally ran to watch it, to make sure we didn't miss anything. And I confirmed that my favorite turtle was Donnie, but I actually loved them all.
A few years later, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie (2014) was released... I couldn't see it in theaters, but I was very excited about it, even though I knew it had nothing to do with the tmnt 2012 version (which I was very hooked on), and that's why I was a little disappointed. Plus, I hated how they sexualized April.
So yeah... you could say I was obsessed with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and although I hadn't realized to what extent, my parents and my two sisters did, so my 16th birthday party (just with these people) was themed around it as a surprise. They inflated green balloons, hung them up, and put on masks in the corresponding colors, and we ate pizza. They put a mini 2012 Donatello toy on my cake, which I still have. Now that I think about it, it was an intimate and very nice party... however, I don't like to show my tastes, so at that moment I did feel uncomfortable and dared to express that I would have preferred a normal party, instead of expressing how incredible it was, because it really was incredible. (What can I say? Although I have always been well-behaved and never caused any problems of any kind, I was also a teenager).
At that time, I was still following the tmnt 2012 series, and I used the internet to keep up with each new episode. I reached a point where I became impatient and had to watch the episodes as soon as they premiered, meaning I had to hurry to watch them on YouTube before the videos were taken down, even if that meant watching them in English and in poor quality.
I had a terrible level of English and I hardly understood anything. But doing this greatly improved my level, and I also started to take my English classes at school seriously to understand the episodes. Without exaggeration, everything I know about English is thanks to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Nowadays, I have a very solid intermediate level, and I still continue to improve thanks to them.
Still in that level of obsession with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, I obviously searched for more on the internet, on YouTube specifically. In one of those many videos I watched, scenes from the tmnt 2007 version caught my attention. That rivalry, that epic battle between Leo and Raph, captivated me. So I watched that movie, and although I didn't find it good overall for several reasons, I was deeply moved by the story between the brothers.
But let's go back to the tmnt 2012 version. The ending of the third season was one of the most shocking endings I've ever seen. And when the fourth season premiered and the turtles were in space... that's exactly when I lost interest. And I really don't know why, since I really like science fiction and everything related to the universe. Maybe it was because I stopped understanding what was happening (remember I was watching the episodes in English). I don't know.
After that, from time to time, I would feel nostalgic and curious about this series, so I would watch a random episode here and there (in general, I'm not good at watching series; I'm capable of watching only the episodes that catch my attention, sacrificing understanding the overall plot). And when I found out it ended, I looked for the last three episodes of the fifth season... and they left me feeling really bad with that dystopian, hopeless, but realistic ending. It's horrible, but I guess that's what I liked the most. Let's admit it, we all like to be masochists.
Later, I sort of saw that a new version had been released with colors too vibrant for my taste and a 2D animation with too much hyperactivity that didn't catch my attention. Yes, I'm talking about the rottmnt version, released in 2018. Nowadays, you don't know how much I regret not paying attention to it.
Years passed and 2023 arrived. At the beginning of that year, I realized that we had Paramount+, and that meant that the tmnt 2012 series, in Spanish, was complete. And my younger sister R hadn't been able to watch it because she had been too young at the time. So I felt like introducing it to her, and that way I could watch the entire series in the right way.
It was like watching a marathon: we finished it all in less than two months, despite our various commitments (she had school and I had work, making it very difficult to coordinate schedules). Suddenly, my obsession returned, very intense. It was the only time that I've had the same obsession in two very different stages of my life. But I still wasn't open to discovering new versions.
(You're going to laugh at what happened next).
My sister L, the one who initially introduced me to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, seeing how much I enjoyed reconnecting with them, insisted that I watch the movie of the rottmnt version, which was on Netflix; she said it was very intense and good, well worth it, but that I had to watch it with an open mind because it had many radical changes.
Much to my dismay, very resistant and with my mind as closed as possible, I watched this movie. And yes, it was very intense and all, but I concluded that I didn't like it. I didn't feel like those were my turtles. Despite that, I watched it again... and then again and again. It's like the character of Donnie caught my attention a bit. It's like the animation wasn't as bad as I had initially thought. It's like the intensity they conveyed was starting to appeal to me. It's like it was somewhat entertaining. It's like I was starting to like the characters a bit and was beginning to identify and even understand them.
And suddenly, even though I kept insisting to myself that I didn't like this new version, I started watching some random episodes of the series... until I began watching them in order... and then I would rewatch some episodes that I had liked... I mean, it's just that there was no one to stop me and I had to stop fooling myself! The rottmnt version had many different things, but it was very well-crafted and very good. Of course, I loved it! And currently, for me, it undoubtedly surpasses the tmnt 2012 version by many reasons that I won't comment on this text.
When the official content of rottmnt ran out, I needed more. So I searched on the internet... and suddenly I got caught up in some fan-made comics... and then I found myself on Tumblr... and then I started to become interested in more versions and began watching them (like the first season of tmnt 1987, some episodes of tmnt 2003, I watched the tmnt 2007 movie again as well as Batman vs. The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which I didn't mention, but I had seen before because I had a certain period in my life when I loved Batman).
And all of that was at the beginning of the year 2023, because then the trailer for the movie Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem appeared, which was going to be released in a few months. I had no idea that a new version was coming out that year, and it came just in time to keep increasing my fan skills. Of course, I went to see it in the cinema and loved it, although rottmnt is still my favorite version.
And nowadays, in 2024, I still feel like one of my central thoughts is the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and I want to keep learning more about them, both the old versions and the new ones that are coming. And I really look forward to continuing to contribute my bit to the fandom with this account. Hopefully, this will also be the year when I can finally watch tmnt 2003 properly.
And it's funny, because suddenly I know many references from many versions and I love that, although I know I have a lot to catch up on. For now, I've never stepped into the realm of comics, and I still don't know if I ever will.
Because I'm just a fan, and those of us who are fans of something should be so on our own terms, without the pressure of anything or anyone.
I've run out of words and I don't know how to conclude this text, but if you've made it this far, wow, I'm impressed! I send you lots of greetings and good vibes, just as Mondo Gecko would say.
•💜•
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yuri-is-online · 6 months ago
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hi! I was experiencing a Thought™ for the Fuyuture au today while reading stories about elderly women feeling guilt over what they did:
so, you know how Yuu lives in a small, gossipy town (most likely) filled with conservative, single-parent hating people?
and you know how unmarried women/teenage girls used to drown/give away/abandon their babies?
what if Yuu did that? They were married to a guy in another dimension with no hint of support from the people they once considered family. With no choice, they hid their pregnancy and either:
a) left Yutu (and co. in Trey! Yutu’s case) at the police station
b) left them on a random person’s front door
c) gave them away to a family member, watching their child(ren) be raised to remember them as anything but their parent
idk I just felt a angsty today
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So. I have more than a passing interest in how child protective services works here in the U.S. and one of the tings I considered doing way way back when I first came up with this ayuu was adding the element of Yuu having lost custody of Yutu at some point. My reasoning for this was that given that Yuu was a missing person for a while and came back claiming to not remember where they were, a lot of people already thought they were mentally unwell and had concerns allowing them to live on their own. Now add a child into that mess? Your mental health can absolutely be used against you by CPS if they decide you shouldn't have your kids, and the instant someone hears Yuu doesn't know where they were for 6+ years or who the father of their child is then yeah. I could see someone thinking it was in the best interest of the child to not be in Yuu's custody. I decided against that because I felt like it was too heavy of a topic but since you've opened up the door-
I think all of the Yutus have a degree of residual trauma from their parent being cursed and forced across the rift. It's especially strong in the non-human children, but they all would exhibit some sort of behavioral problems if they were taken away from Yuu. That's before you get into the various medical issues the non-human kids have; Ruggie and Azul's Yutus were worryingly slow in reaching all of their developmental milestones, Leona! Yutu seems to have a chronic iron deficiency that he has to take supplements for, Jade, Floyd, and Malleus's Yutus all have some sort of eyesight problem etc. I could see it being something that causes Yutu to bounce from placement to placement a lot and never fully finding a place to settle down. And speaking of Trey! Yutu and his triplet siblings, while modern CPS does try to keep siblings together, especially if they're multiples, it's not seen as mandatory so there is a very real chance the triplets would be split up and only reunited when the Dark Mirror summons them back to Twisted Wonderland so they can attend NRC.
Now maybe Yuu really does try to get their kid(s) back but is never able to get their Case Worker to see past the amnesia thing. Because let's face it that is a huge problem, and it only gets worse as Yuu tries to force themselves to remember. That could maybe make Yuu think it really is better for Yutu to remain in care and resigning themselves to life without their son. Maybe they already were convinced of that from the start and tried to focus on rebuilding their life. Maybe they'll get lucky and their Case Worker will place Yutu with a family member so they can at least be a part of his life in some capacity. No matter what happens, I think this inner turmoil and grief would speed up the strain the curse put on their body and kill them a lot faster.
If Yutu was being raised by a relative I could see this being the time that he would be taken aside and told that Yuu was actually his parent. If you want to be especially angsty maybe he already sort of suspected that because of how most of Yuu's family treated him, but having it confirmed just adds to the strain and distance between him and whoever is taking care of him.
If Yutu was in foster care by that point I could see him just never being notified why his parent's regular visits had slowed down and suddenly stopped. It puts him in an unimaginable amount of pain when he gets older and goes searching for answers to learn about how Yuu was suffering alone. It depresses him and drives him further towards more destructive behaviors. Deuce! Yutu probably wouldn't bother with keeping up the honor student facade and just go full delinquent, and I could see Jade, Ruggie, Leona, and Cater's Yutus all deciding they'd rather run away and rough it than continue to deal with the system. Trey! Yutu puts all of his effort into reconnecting with his sisters and making sure that they're ok.
All of them would be much more nervous, much less trusting, and just that much more desperate to prevent the bad future. Yutu already really treasures the time he spends with Yuu in the past but if this was his backstory I think it would be literally everything to him as opposed to just a big part of what he was fighting for. He would be extra desperate for your approval and love because he was starved for it growing up, and noticeably shy about it because there is a part of him that would think you felt like he didn't deserve it.
TᴖT this made me very sad
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jesslockwood · 6 months ago
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Detecting the Haunted Masterlist 
Chapter Three
Word Count: 3.2k
Pairing(s): Anthony Lockwood x Detective!Reader
Warnings: Swearing, Angst
A/n: hello friends! I'm sorry I haven't posted in forever!!! its going to be a busy summer for me as its my last year in my acting program, and I have professional Shakespeare shows coming up (auditions and rehearsals) soon. I really hope to be active but im not sure how active I will be but I hope you enjoy this chapter!
Add yourself to the Taglist
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In all of Anthony’s life, he wanted people to love him. He wasn’t sure why but the praise of others and the showering of adoration towards him just gave him the feeling of being loved. Maybe it was because that’s what his life was missing, love. 
The current problem with wanting to be even just admired, was that you wouldn’t speak to him, unless absolutely necessary or with someone else in the room. He couldn’t pin point what had changed, but it put him in a grouchy mood. 
He had even snapped at George and Lucy at one point, because of it, which he felt bad about.
He just couldn’t understand why you would all of a sudden you just seem to loathe the mere presence of him. 
That was until he saw you having a conversation with none other than Quill Kipps in the library. That made Lockwood want to explode. He did his best to keep his composure, but how could he? Especially when someone he cared for was talking to his rival. 
You had laughed at something he said, before Anthony made his way over. 
“Tony! I see you have a new agent in training on your hands.” Kipps seemingly tries to antagonize him, “I thought you had enough troubles trying to keep your agency afloat, Being such a small and insignificant one.” 
Lockwood grits his teeth, and his fist goes into a ball, clenching it so tightly. 
“Anyway, my offer still stands.” He says directed towards Y/n in a overly confident tone before making his leave.
Anthony tightens his jaw even more if that was even possible to do so.
You shake your head while smiling, as Kipps leaves and Anthony notices. 
“When’d you get so chummy with Kipps?” He asks with an intensity that you can only describe as uncomfortable.
You ignore his prompted stare down, and shift over a book, and open it to start your next reading.
He keeps staring waiting for you answer.
“When did you get so controlling with who I talk to? Last time I checked you were my boss, not my boyfriend.” You say not even meeting his gaze, ignoring the way saying boyfriend made your body tingle.
He looks genuinely shocked, and hurt, when you spew the words with venom at him, wth a fiery anger, but you had to hate him, or else you’d hate everyone else around you. The problem was that hating everyone wasn't an option you wanted to explore, so your anger had to be directed towards Anthony Lockwood. That was or else it would consume you.
George walks towards the two, carefully, as if he could be the detonator to explode one of the two colleges of his on each other.
“I uh, found the paper in the archives we were looking for, Y/n.” He says before carefully setting it down on the table the two of you were working at.
George had noticed the tension in the house between Lockwood and Y/n, he knew Lucy could feel it too, as she kept trying to get Lockwood and Y/n to avoid each other as much as possible as she tried to figure out what triggered all this, for lack of a better term, teenage angst in the house. 
Well it felt like more than just teenage angst. It felt like a rage radiating off of the two directed towards each other, as if they were two old miserable manifestations bickering like an old couple while trying to murder everyone in the way that ticked them off.
Yeah that was more of the level of tension that was going on, especially when Lucy or himself got caught in the crossfire of the two. He actually didn’t hate Y/n, he had gotten to tolerate her during their times in the archives, but he couldn’t get a good reading of why she acted the way she did towards them, but mostly Lockwood. He was so curious of what was making her tick, or ticked off, pun intended.
Even Lockwood was making things feel off. He had been pissed almost every single day these past couple of weeks, and had even bursted with anger towards himself and Lucy.
George started to think of all the ways he could figure out what was wrong, and deiced to let Lucy in on his plot when he got home, to figure out what the hell these two had tasted to be so bitter to everyone.
George had come out of dreamland to find Y/n and Lockwood bickering.
“At least I talked to someone who wasn’t a stuck up prick for once!” Y/n almost yells.
“I think you’ve got it all wrong, love, you did talk to the stuck up prick, he just left with what’s left of his dignity, from the last time he was here!” Lockwood raises her one.
“Guys, Guys!” Lucy comes rushing In to break it up, “Maybe let’s try to not get kicked out of the archives? Y/n let’s uh, go get lunch, there’s this place I've been meaning to take you to.” 
Y/n gives Anthony one last glare before, picking up her jacket and heading out with Lucy.
“Well, that was awkward…” George mumbles faintly, before giving Lockwood a disappointed look before getting back to work.
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“Urgh! He such a pompous ass!” You rant to Lucy, in between shoving pizza in your mouth. 
“Lockwood can be… selfish. But it’s really more because he wants the us and the whole agency to benefit… trust me I know it all too well.” She tries to console you, and you can see the genuine hurt in her eyes from it. 
If he could hurt Lucy, and get others hurt, even killed… who knows what the guy could do to you. Maybe the Job Kipps offered you wasn’t such a bad idea. 
It especially felt good to know it would make Lockwood infuriated. Maybe this was a chance to get a back at Lockwood a bit. Not to the degree you wanted, but it was something.
You make small talk with Lucy while eating, coming up with a plan in your head of how to piss him off the most.
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To say Lockwood was pissed was a total understatement. He was enraged.
George and Lucy even seemed to tiptoed around Lockwood as of recently, and Lockwood felt nothing but isolated, and that led him to be able to sit and stew in his anger even longer. 
The both of you seemed to avoid each other physically, which made Lockwood all the more furious. The only time you’d see each other was for training, which George and Lucy had taken over most of that, and cases.
Today you had to train with your rapier again, and that was the main thing Lockwood oversaw.
“C’mon again!” He yells, as you missed one of the practice targets. 
You glare daggers into his direction, as he seemly does the same. 
“I would be a lot better if I didn’t have the constant screaming in my ear.” You mumble sarcastically.
“Sorry, I didn’t get that? Maybe you could actually try this time?” He says before smirking and leaning back to where he was sitting seeming satisfied with ticking you off.
“I’d like to see you do better.” You taunt stalking towards him, “The best I’ve seen in action was the Fittes team at a case I was working.”
He clenches his jaw, looking at you with an intense fire behind his eyes. 
“You’re more show than skill.” You smirk as his face turns even more sour. He gets up and moves right into your personal space. 
“Really? If you think I’m all show, then lets put it to the test, Love.” He pulls his rapier out and backs you into the wall.
You visibly gulp, not because of his challenge, but the sheer proximity of how close his face was to yours. 
He stares into your eyes, with his full of an emotion you couldn’t quite pinpoint. He had a anger but there was something else behind it. 
He shakes his head and scoffs, turning around walking away.
That made your whole body burn with fury. You knew he was one of the best from stories you had heard, but boy did that make you want to try harder to be better. 
“Like I said, all show.” You mumble loud enough for him to hear. 
He stops on the spot, turning around about to say something, and before he can Lucy is running down the stairs with a small stack of letters in her hand. 
“Hey, Y/n You’ve got mail.” 
You give Lockwood a victory smirk, and he gives you a glare saying ‘this isn’t over’.
“Thanks, Lucy.” You take the mail form her, before looking it over, until stopping on one letter in particular. 
“Crap…” you mumble to yourself, opening it quickly. 
Lockwood and Lucy seem intrigued to know what had gotten the rise out of you.
You skim over the letter, or well, the invitation. Your grandparents wanted to see you, and you knew that they rarely did unless it had to do with their agenda. 
You started to feel ill, hoping it was you actually getting sick to get out of it, instead of the idea of visiting them. 
“What is it?” Lockwood asks slightly worried as you lean to grab the wall. 
You want to throw the letter out, but you hand it to Lucy, “You can read it amongst yourselves, if you wish, Especially since I think I’m going to need you to accompany me.”
They give each other a look, as you head upstairs and They both follow you up quickly, if not seconds later. 
George seems intrigued to what is going on, and comes out of the sitting room area, with his usual cleaning gear on, and duster in his hand. 
Lucy starts reading aloud, “Y/n Y/l/n and Lockwood & co, You are formally invited to The Saunders Ball, this Friday. Please wear formal wear and please arrive early to meet and dine with The Saunders.”
“How in the bloody hell do you know the Saunders?!” Lockwood almost yells.
George pipes up, “And why would one of the oldest of richest families in London want dinner with with us?”
“Blood Relation, to me, unfortunately.” You say, wishing this wasn’t their reaction. 
Lucy and Lockwood sit there with their mouths ajar, while George looks like he’s going through every probability in his mind.
“Look, there’s no need to come. I can face my grandparents myself-“
“There’s no way were passing this up. It’s an opportunity for the company to find more clients.” Lockwood pipes up.
Your jaw clenches as try you to smile to pretend to be pleased that he wants to come. 
“Great. does everyone have formal wear? Or do we have to go shopping?”
Lucy shakes her head no, and you give a light smile, before grabbing her hand.
“Let’s go then, my treat.” You say before running out the door with Lucy. 
Lockwood gives one last glance at the door, before standing up.
“C’mon George, Lets go find out all we can about the Saunders.”
Lockwood wouldn’t try to dive into your history if he could help it, but he needed to know anything he could about who’s doors he was about to step into and how to best be prepared to gain new clients. 
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Lucy had told you a bit about her past life, how she didn’t come from much, and her old employer, and briefly what happened to her best friend Norrie.
“Hey Lu?” You grab her attention with the nickname you called her in your nightly talks, “Im sorry.”
“What do you mean?” She asks, looking directly at you as you walked down the street of the shops. 
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about all this. It’s something my Mum left in the past when she left home from my grandparents. I’ve never really lived rich my mother just came from money.” You sigh as you continue to explain, “We really lived off of my Dad’s pay, and my mother worked part time in a flower shop. It- it’s not really important what they did. But my grandparents- well they only ever summon me if they want something.”
Lucy gives a sympathetic look, with almost an understanding. 
“My grandparents hated my dad, because the took their only daughter away, to live a ‘life of poverty’ and my dad, ‘he couldn’t provide’. Ah, it’s so messed up! Then my parents had me, and all they ever wanted was me to become their ‘Perfect grandchild of the Saunders’ but I never was that, or could be that.” You ramble it all out.
“I’m sorry y/n” she replies, “For all that family rubbish. I- I know the struggle of family too well.” She mentions with an understanding you’ve never felt. 
You felt so heard. You felt so seen even though your pasts couldn’t have been more different. It was so touching.
“Thank you. For being my friend.” You blurt out, as she gives you a genuine smile. 
“C’mon let's check out this shop!” You say while dragging her in and you both giggle. 
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Lockwood was tapping his fingers against the table. He was getting George to pull article after article about your grandparents. After Fairfax, Lockwood couldn’t just walk into this blindly, especially at the reaction that Y/n had at the mere invitation of dinner with them. 
The archives seemed to have little to no information so far, other than that they were old money for being a huge lavender supply over the years and that they had a similar social circle to Fairfax; rich and socialites. Their only link to each other was Marissa Fittes and Penelope Fittes.
Lockwood sighed, as he hoped this wouldn’t turn into another Fairfax situation. At this point in time, he didn’t think he could really trust y/n anymore. 
But maybe that was the problem between himself and y/n, that she couldn’t trust him. He never had thought about it that way. He had told Lucy and George about his past, but not y/n, so maybe that’s why she didn’t share much about herself. 
Maybe it was time Lockwood let himself go of this rampant disease of the feeling of resentment. At least to a small degree, just so they all could survive dinner and the ball with one of London's most powerful and influential families. 
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It was finally the day to head to dinner and the ball with your grandparents, and you were just pretending to have it all together, but underneath you were an earthquake of nerves waiting to start to rumble. 
You were curling Lucy’s hair with an curling iron, trying to distract yourself from the whole situation. 
“That’s a beautiful necklace you have on.” You mention breaking the almost silence as the record player played a soft tune in the back of the room.
She grabs it, fiddling with it, “Thanks, Lockwood gave it to me, for the Fittes ball.” You freeze for a second, trying to hold your face still in the same way it was. 
You were partly shocked she even mentioned it, because that was the night your father had died at the hands of him.  You were Devastated but wasn’t the only emotion you were feeling, you couldn’t help but feel a pang in your chest when she said Lockwood gave it to her. You hated yourself even more for falling into this trap of his charms. 
You were trying to hold a small smile, ads you finished Lucy’s hair. Your eyes started to water slightly, and as you tried to hold your tears in, there was a knock at the door. 
“Luce, Y/n, are you two ready yet?” Lockwood asks from the other side.
“You’re done Lu.” You say before turning around before the tears started to come out and started to go get your dress on. 
“I’m coming out, Y/n just has to put her dress on.” Lucy explains.
“Okay.” He repsonds.
Lucy slips out, and you here her shoes click against the stairs as she walks down. 
You wipe away your tears and start to pull your dress on before hearing your name being called.
 “Y/n?” 
“Yes Lockwood?” You reply.
You start to struggled with he zipper on your dress, as Lockwood starts to speak, “I just wanted to say that I’m- Y/n/n are you okay?” He asks as you made a loud sound as you crashed into the vanity. 
“Uh yeah I just can’t- I can’t get this stupid zipper.” You sigh in defeat, “Can you come in and help me?”
“Yeah, of course.” He says as he opens the door. His breath is taken away as If his lungs were ghost touched. You were leaning against the vanity, with a beautiful red dress on. 
“I know it’s pathetic but that the last case we had this week hurt my shoulder, so you don’t have to say it.” You mention looking away, before meeting his gaze. 
Was he… admiring you? You couldn’t tell for the few seconds he looked at you, before his expression changed as he moved towards you.
“It was my fault, on that case. I should have prepared you more so don’t worry about it. I’m just glad the dresser that hit you in the shoulder didn’t hurt you more.” He said, “That was quick moving, your getting out of the way before it squashed you.“ 
That was almost a compliment and an admittance of fault. What was going on with him? He motions for you to turn around and you do. As he moves your hair out of the way, a shiver runs down your spine, and goose bumps arise on your skin. 
You try to distract yourself at the feeling of his close proximity to you by cracking a joke, “Yeah well, now I can’t zip myself up, or get out of this stupid gown. Thank you Grandma and Grandpa for this choice of attire I truly adore feeling trapped.” 
He laughs a small almost silent laugh, as he grabs the zipper and slowly zips it up. It was agonizingly slow. You couldn’t tell if he was doing this to spite you, or because he was feeling the same weird feelings that you were. 
You shook off the second thought, it had to be to make you uncomfortable. You couldn’t have second thoughts on this no matter how warm it made your body feel. 
You swear you heard him take a shaky breath in before he finished and you turned to face him. You were really close to his face, and you could see the way his eyes looked almost puppy dog like. His eyes trailed your whole face for a few seconds before he took a small step back.
“Shall we?” He extended his arm, before you both descended the stairs, heading out to the car to take you to the infamous Saunders ball. You only hoped that your grandparents didn’t pull some bullshit like they usually did with you. 
You had no idea what was in store for you and your team, and that’s what was killing you. The not knowing.
Taglist:
@waitingforthesunrise @sleep-i-ness @rinisfruity14 @uku-lelevillain
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self-indulgent-paw-patrol · 5 months ago
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Ask game for Chase?
The pupper ever!! Also two other people asked for Chase while I was already working on it XD I'm sorry it's taking me literally days to get them all done, I'm having trouble to think properly on what to say for some stuff in these
My first impression - I'm not tanking this. His car is blue and white, he's a cop and HIS NAME IS CHASE. HMMMM WHERE HAVE I SEEN THIS BEFORE, OH I WONDER--
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My impression now - He's precious. No, really. A+ for effort in everything he does but he should learn to relax a little more, just a liiiiiiiittle more
Favorite thing about that character - He's always willing to try new things out of his comfort zone and he always gives it his best, plus his loyalty levels are off the charts
Least favorite thing - He's too much of a people pleaser Istg-- Chase, sweetheart, you're supposed to be a figure of authority XD And this will sound like a dumb thing to dislike but I dislike the fact he's a German Shepherd. I think it's too obvious a breed for police dogs and he doesn't LOOK like one at all for me. When I first saw him without his gear, I was like "Wait is he a Belgian Malinois??? Omg please yes that would be cool to not have a German Shepherd as a Police Dog for ONCE" but yeah my dreams were crushed quickly on my first Google Search on him
Favorite line/scene - It's not specifically the line, but mostly the scene: Have you EVER seen Chase refuse a job or go against Ryder???
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I know he ended up changing his mind after that talk with Ryder, but IN THIS MOMENT, he stood his ground and said NO. It's even in his body language: His ears are slightly back, his expression is serious like "don't even try arguing with me on this", his tail isn't relaxed, his paw stomping on the floor to make his point. Notice his frown even deepens as the elevator door closes just before it goes down. This is SO IMPORTANT to me you have no idea, especially considering how much of a people pleaser Chase is and how he holds Ryder as the most important person in his life. We know Chase would do anything for Ryder. But at this exact moment? He was decided to NOT do something for Ryder. This is such a powerful, yet overlooked and underrated scene, as well as character development. It encapsulates perfectly how there's so much more to Chase than any of us knew so far.
Favorite interaction that character has with another - Mighty Movie Skase moment #2 (I think? I counted at least 4 big moments) when Chase goes to check on Skye when she was sulking on the back of the Aircraft Carrier. Her problems there are totally out of his league, he literally cannot relate to anything she's currently going or went through in the past- still he tries to show support the only way he can at the moment, by being there for her, by listening to her. He's a keeper, Skye, go for it XD
A character that I wish that character would interact with more - Marshall and Zuma. They used to play a lot before, but now...? I'm still at the 8th season and I'm seriously missing those fun and slice of life moments
Another character from another fandom that reminds me of that character - Leonardo, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, specifically 2012 series
A headcanon about that character - I think Chase was one of those kind of puppies who just didn't know when to fucking STOP. 24/7 playful baby. Also a natural explorer, always sniffing everything, licking everything, maybe biting, touching, scratching, growling, barking at anything new for a while. Ever curious, always being the puppy to go ahead of the others, "exploring the waters to open the way and make sure it's safe for the others to come after him". On a second note, I've seen one too many people returning adopted puppies for this reason here where I live, because "they're a handful and I wasn't expecting this" 🤦🏽‍♀️
A song that reminds of that character - "Nothing Can Stop Me Now"
An unpopular opinion about that character - Idk why all the hate, even if you're ACAB, it's not like Chase even does a cop job at all XD Have you seen him arresting someone outside from movie verse? If anything, you'd WANT your cops to be like him LMAO
Favorite picture - Y'know how in the first movie Chase was in absolute awe when he saw his new car for the very first time? YEAH, like, he KNOWS Ryder designs and gets them crazy cool stuff, and it doesn't stop him from getting UTTERLY AMAZED every time. Tbh I had the same reaction as them all when I saw that sick af Mustang-looking police cruiser like HOLY SHIT YOU GET THE COOLEST TOYS-- AND YOU GET TO CATAPULT THEM DOWN THE HOT WHEELS RAMP AT TOP SPEED TOO??? Win for life.
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fics-n-stuff · 8 months ago
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In preparation for Heartbreak High season 2 TOMORROW, and following up on this post from a year and a half ago I made about why Spider should have a redemption arc, I have another lukewarm take to present: if Spider deserves redemption then so does Sasha.
I thought about making this post ages ago, not long after the original Spider post, but I never got around to writing it out... til now! Here we go!
After season 1, I was seeing A LOT of Sashsa hate, much of which I agreed with but some that definitely went too far. I saw a lot more people calling Sasha irredeemable than I saw of anyone speaking that way about Spider or Dusty. I hate Sasha as much as the next HBH fan, but it is undeniable that if we give Spider enough grace to encourage his redemption we should extend the same courtesy to Sasha; if we have enough faith in the show to handle the nuance of his redemption then we should have faith in it to be able to handle her redemption too.
Sasha is not trying to be a bad person, she genuinely believes (in my opinion) that she is trying her best to be a good person. The problem is she's confusing virtue signalling and "wokeness" with actually being a good person, and that makes her behave like a bitch. What it all boils down to, just like with Spider, is attitude. What they need to do is pretty similar as well; Spider needs to start paying attention and empathising with the experiences of people around him and Sasha needs to realise that what she thinks is genuine empathy and compassion is really just performative and does not make her a good person. They both need to stop viewing themselves as victims, they both need to be more willing to hear other people out, and I believe that they both have the capacity to change.
The two things I hated most about Sasha were:
Her relationship with Quinni and the way she treated Quinni during that time, as I'm sure most (if not all) of you will agree. That whole episode with the book signing (episode 6: "Angeline") makes me so mad, and it is a perfect example of how her empathy is not genuine. When Sasha is told that Quinni is autistic, her immediate response is "I need to do some more research" instead of "I need to ask Quinni what she needs and what she wants". Right there, she fails to empathise with Quinni as a person because she's too busy thinking about how she should be empathising with Autistic People as a whole and thereby completely misses the point. In the same vein, we the viewers all see Sasha's ableism when it comes to Quinni and how she fails to treat Quinni like an equal, but Sasha is so convinced that she is a good person because she supports all of the right ideas that she fails to see when she's falling short when it comes to the real people actually in her life. (Even at the end of this post when I have explained why Sasha deserves redemption, just know that I absolutely DO NOT think that Sasha and Quinni should EVER get back together.)
The way she just drops people when the social tides turn against them. We see her do this with both Amerie and Harper, completely dropping them as friends as soon as everybody is mad at them and not even speaking with them first or even allowing them a chance to just talk to her. This still makes me incredibly angry. Sasha had every right to not want to be friends with both Amerie and Harper after the things that happened, but the way she cut them out of her life so completely without a second thought makes me seethe. Now, there are layers to this. First we have the double-edged-sword of school social hierarchy and Sasha's "woke" attitudes. I personally believe that Sasha definitely dropped her friends because she didn't want them to tank her social status (like lots of teenagers would, horrible as it is), but she justified it to herself by rationalizing it like a political/social justice issue. Amerie did something bad = Amerie bad = I won't talk to Amerie anymore. She treats the ending of a friendship like a corporate boycott. What she says to Harper in episode 6 ("I'm not gonna let you suck me into your negativity black hole. You're an emotional vampire, Harper. I watched a whole YouTube video on it.") is a shining example of both how much of a bitch Sasha can be to the people around her and how she justifies that behaviour to herself. They are bad so I don't have to treat them well. And sometimes that line of thought is genuinely justified, but people are not that black and white and to cut ties with someone you considered a close friend without even talking to them or allowing them to even try and explain or apologise is peak bitch behaviour if you ask me. Especially when it's so clear that they are struggling and have nobody else to turn to.
You may have gathered that both of these points link back to the same thing: her hollow social activism. I am not saying here that she doesn't actually care about any of the causes she supports, nor am I saying that no good has been achieved through her various activist endeavors, but I really think that she approaches it all in the wrong way. Sasha tries so hard to say the correct thing, support the correct causes, and be on the correct side of things in a widespread social view that, not only does it create an element of performance and virtue-signalling, but she just doesn't take the time to actually learn and consider things without looking so far out. To reverse a common phrase, she can't see the trees for the forest, (i.e. she's so focused on the bigger picture she can't see the closer points). I'm sure she really does agree with all of the political and social justice causes that she supports, but because that's all she thinks about it creates the insufferable holier-than-thou attitude that makes her such a bitch while also leaving this vacuum where she fails to apply these ideals to her real life. Empathy is research, compassion is protesting, and when someone fucks up and people turn on them then it's fine to just turn on them too because they did a Bad Thing, no matter what else is happening.
But the door to redemption is open for Sasha and, just like with Spider, I want to see what the writers do with it. I think the big bus fight in episode 6 and Sasha finding out that Quinni has gone non-verbal in episode 7 could serve to open her eyes as to how uncompassionate she's been to the people around her. If she gets clued in to what happened with Harper she may reflect on how poorly she treated her while she was dealing with all of that trauma and realise that she isn't as much of "an empath" as she believes she is, and that just might be enough to open the door for some well needed introspection. Progress would probably be kinda slow, like I said in my post about Spider most people with any kind of strong belief tend to get defensive when challenged, but, also like I said about Spider, if people hold Sasha accountable then change can 100% happen. If the people around her continue to show her that she is not the good and just person she thinks she's being but rather that she's being a bitch and not offering any support or understanding to the people around her, if they can show her that her attitude is causing them harm, then I think that has the potential to open her mind and allow her to learn to fix those problems.
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