#i hate seeing people hate and its not even like. just on their blog but they go to other people and go 'eugh i hope the akianners dont make

[transmisogyny-explained]

I want to submit a perspective on "afab transfemininity" from. an afab multi gender person. I know my experience isn't representative of everyone who calls themselves this, but I wanted to at least share

I don't call myself a trans woman, I hesitate to call myself transfem. nonetheless, I feel connected to femininity in a distinctly transgender way. when I first came out, I hated being a girl. I was a transmedicalist and validated myself by invalidating others. I had to face a lot of internalized misogyny and transphobia in order to really learn what it meant to be a man. after I started testosterone about 3 yrs ago, I realized I was a lesbian, and started feeling more comfortable being, at least in part, a woman. it was different this time because it was something I liked, something new and my own, not something ascribed to me. it's not cisgender in any way, it is transfemininity

this being said, I know my experience toward transfemininity is extremely different from the norm. I am not what most people are referring to when they refer to transfems, and there are many definitions of transfem that do not include me. despite that, I do have some experiences that overlap, things I can relate to. my femininity is at its core transgender in nature. my gender now is more complex... I feel like both a man and a woman, neither and both. but that doesn't mean my feelings about my gender are predatory or invalid. I don't want to talk over transfems, I am very aware of my place in these conversations. but I still have a place, and it frustrates me to see you share posts that minimize my experience into a stereotype

Why do you view transfemininity as being, at its core, the experience of being “both a man and a woman” lmao

Get back to me when you start viewing trans women as actual women and transfemininity as actual femininity, and not an aesthetic or a vibe or “some other third thing” apart from femininity.

You “feel femininity in a distinctly transgender way?” Congrats! You’re nonbinary! But that is NOT what being a trans woman is — Their womanhood and femininity is not essentially different from cis women’s.

What you are describing is a very generic experience of being a feminine nonbinary person, and I don't say that to insult you; but to compare that experience to those of trans women’s betrays the fact that you don't view them as the same gender as cis women. Which is transmisogyny. It’s textbook third-gendering.

Call yourself a nonbinary woman- Call yourself whatever you want, in fact. But trans women and TMA people are never going to feel safe around you so long as you continue insisting that transfemininity is essentially the same as the nonbinary femininity you experience, and essentially different from “real” cis women’s femininity.

Also, can I just say that it’s a little condescending that you would end your ask by saying “I’m aware of my place in these conversations, but…”

Like, if you were really “aware of your place” and were actually listening to transfems when we talk about transfeminism, you would be able to recognize the enormous amount of transmisogyny baked into your message. On top of the third-gendering, you also managed to:

Imply that TMA people don’t understand the complexities of gender and nonbinarity like you, a TME person, do

Imply that TMA people creating the language and spaces to discuss our experiences in a way that excludes you, a TME person, is invalidating and somehow tantamount to labeling you as “predatory” (what does that even mean?)

Sent an unprompted ask to a transfem’s blog venting your frustrations with the language of transfeminism, despite the fact that I’m not even the one who made those posts?

Showed a pretty absurd amount of entitlement by insinuating that it’s somehow my problem that you feel frustration over misunderstanding the basics of transfeminist theory

Subtly demanded that I do the emotional labor of managing your frustration, which, frankly, is just classic misogyny

Displayed a complete lack of understanding towards what transmisogyny even is, nor why we, as the direct targets of transmisogyny, need the the language and spaces to discuss it

I really don’t care what transfem “experiences” you think you relate to, the fact that you perpetuate and can benefit from transmisogyny will always separate you from us, and if you actually gave a shit about us and our struggles, you would recognize that and try to be a better ally to us rather than co-opting and redefining our language in a shallow attempt to define us out of existence.

As has been said countless times now:

“Transfeminine” does not mean “trans + feminine,” it is a term coined by TMA people to describe our specific experiences with being denied our femininity. That is something which you, as a person for whom (as you said) womanhood/femininity was ascribed by the system of patriarchy, cannot understand in the way we do.

[the-exiled-comic]

I get what you mean, as a (different) ClanGen comic blog creator myself x.x It’s definitely gotten harder to manage the sort of public responses and interactions when it comes to those kinds of asks. People being rude or parasocial, or outright asking you to tell you the entire future plot over and over again, or jumping to crazy conclusions and not listening, or otherwise not treating you like you’re a living human being with a life behind the screen. The amount of asks I’ve had to delete or ignore (or even fans I’ve had to block) because of how bad the ask culture/“content consuming culture”/fan interaction has gotten, it’s exhausting. Very very exhausting. I’m surprised you haven’t turned off asks completely, I’ve had to do that multiple times now just to give myself mental health breaks from it all. I love drawing and I love creating so I don’t think I could ever stop creating comics, but my god sometimes I really wish I could upload my things to a vacuum where I could just create without ever seeing any of the fan responses to it haha

yeah its rough out here. theres a lot of very positive comments and thoughts directed at comics too, so its certainly not all bad. might be bold to say, but the world is a better place with our stories and i dont think we should ever feel forced to stop sharing them but there is a ratio of negativity thats much higher than we would all like, and i just wanna encourage people who may feel negatively to keep it to themselves unless the author outright asks for critique. and to just re-read or drop the comic if it is so confusing or frustrating

i actually did have the ask box closed for a while, i dont remember how long. it was after firespots betrayal, there was a lot of really upset people and at some point there were over 100 unanswered asks from weeks of build up that i just purged and closed it for a while. i dont mean to threaten to take away things bc i know i enjoy reading insight from creators i like. but sometimes i dont want to deal with it and sadly it IS because people are mean or they talk about my characters in ways that make me feel like im a bad writer or that they hate what i made

[ube-bluebay]

i have a problem

really long rambling in tags

[oceanwithouthermoon]

ive received multiple dms or asks asking why i blocked people (fyi to the anons, i dont have that many people blocked so youre not saving yourself much embarrassment by being anonymous😭) and im just gonna say this here EVEN THOUGH I DONT OWE ANYONE AN EXPLANATION FOR THIS im just tired of the messages

i will block anyone who has disrespectful takes (usually misogynistic but sometimes just straight up mean, FOR EXAMPLE if you make a really farfetched take or disregard canon SPECIFICALLY for the sake of discrediting someone elses take or ship) or if you always post a ship i dont want to see 🤷🏻‍♀️

so basically youll get blocked for being a dick... or a torisai shipper 😭😭 thats the criteria

[dusty-pistol]

I'm kinda baffled that I've only seen one Callum Crown ask blog so far. And it's... wildly out of character if I'm even allowed to say so. It must've been made before we got all this information on him or by someone who just doesn't know much about him. I don't mean to sound rude in any degree, I'm just surprised, is all.

(Please, someone make an actual callum ask blog, or I may have to do it myself. Which I am admittedly scared to do so.)

[wormchaser]

you are complaining about complaining too much while complaining about the fact that maybe people dont like you because you complain too much while complaining about being alone. just stop complaining and do something about it. talk to people. reach out. dont just wait for someone to come to you first.

i have tried reaching out to different people in the past year or so but it never works. i understand its my own fault for letting relationships decay because of my own insecurities and issues but that doesn't mean i can just will myself to think or believe different things about myself. it's a self fulfilling prophecy ; i think people don't like me so i don't reach out so people don't like me etc . i am sure you do not want to hear me list all the things i want to say in response so i will put them in the tags.

[hermitcraftx]

just got a dm abt one of my posts and y'all please don't try and show the hermits (or any minecraft youtuber or content creator for that matter) my posts, i'm uncomfortable with it and don't want any of my posts shown to a cc. if they stumble upon it naturally that's unfortunate but i can live with it since i do maintag a lot (something i REALLY need to stop doing tbh i already know i need to make a tagging system just for my blog that wont clog results) but going out of ur way to show a cc is entirely different and something i am not comfortable with.

no hate to the person at all but even if i wasn't a little silly and weird with it sometimes i wouldn't be comfortable with it, i want my blog to be a purely fandom only space with none of the creators involved <3 please respect this

[yippie-madness]

actually and genuinely fuck you if your reslonse to seeing dying people beg for you to help them by answering a fucking ask is to whine that it makes tou uncomfy.

"it makes me feel uncomfortable, it makes me feel guilty" GOOD. GENOCIDE IS MEANT TO BE FUCKING UNCOMFORTABLE. MAYBE YOU WOULDN'T FEEL GUILTY IF YOU DIDN'T RESPOND BY IGNORING IT. GET USED TO DEALING WITH DISCOMFORT YOU ABSOLUTE SCUM. THESE PEOPLE ARE FUCKING DYING. IMAGINE SEEING SOMEONE, A LOVED ONE, YOUR KID, YOUR PARENT, YOUR SIBLING, YOUR FRIEND WHOEVER BURN TO DEATH INFRONT OF YOU AND THEN GETTING THIS FUCKING RESPONSE. IMAGINE NOT HAVING THE MONEY TO BUY WATER AND THIS BEING PEOPLES' RESPONSES. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU. YOU ARE ABSOLUTE FUCKING SCUM.

"disappointing to see 10 new asks in my inbox just to be the same ask for donations over and over" IMAGINE BEGGING FOR HELP BECAUSE YOU ARE TRAPPED IN NOT A WAR ZONE A GENOCIDE STARVING BECAUSE ALL AID HAS BEEN BLOCKADED AND SOMEONE COMPLAINING THAT ITS "disappointing" TO HAVE TO SEE YOU ASKING FOR HELP. NOT EVEN FOR MONEY JUST FOR SOMEONE TI SHARE YOUR STORY.

"Edit: To all the people reblogging this, I'm sorry you have had to deal with this too. And yes, you can put this in your pinned post! Stay safe <3" DEAL? DEAL WITH DYING PEOPLE BEGGING FOR HELP? FUCK YOU. YOU ARE FUCKING VILE. YOU ARE THE KIND OF PEOPLE THAT MAKE GENOCIDES LIKE THIS HAPPEN, LET THEM GO UNNOTICED.

grow the fuck up. i don't care that your probably like 13, you can do SOMETHING. you can share posts, you can email representatives, you can sign petitions, you can just talk about. but now. the idea of other people suffering makes you feel too uncomfy and too guilty to bother.

and dont you dare go calling yourself an anti zionist if your like this you coward.

[imaginaryanon]

ohhh, da fandom, how i've not fucking missed you lmaooo the new game's release is still a month away but already i'm reminded exactly why i became convinced i'd never want anything to do with that franchise again. jesus christ. except this time im 30 and hopefully better at tailoring my online experience to not exhaust me & make me pissed and anxious (even if half of da tumblr is like. already laser-focused on making this a shit experience for everyone who stumbles upon their fuckass posts huh hfgjhjhjd)

anyway i'm listening & learning & blocking even MORE tags & not looking at SHIT until i play the game myself <3 For Real this time. "oh but surely it's just an innocent opinion and not a spoiler or anything--" that is the devil talking. all posts abt veilguard rn are full of shit, on account of The Game Isn't Fucking Out Yet How Are You Guys Already Having Novel-Length Opinions (TM)!!!! anyway i simply don't need that kind of energy in my life

i enjoy these games too much to be chased outta here by deranged drama i'm not even a part of again 😭 get fucked & god unbless

[sttoru]

ima tell u this now : if u hate on x reader fics, block me cus by doing that you r doing us both a great favour 🤚🏽 ion need any of ur negativity on my blog because this is a safe space for people who do enjoy x reader fics goodbye

[bibuckleykinard]

how many times do we need to learn as people that irony and hyperbole can be harmful because 'jokes' aren't easily distinguished from genuine thoughts and feelings until we stop rewarding people for speaking or posting about violence

like even if you're joking/don't actually believe that/think whoever you are insulting is bad/immoral/fictional therefore deserves it - ad hominem attacks always do more harm to the people who share those characteristic then the individual you intend to cause harm to or discredit

[arrowpunk]

Sometimes I think about how I used to know this like fairly popular artist who made a decent living off commissions who like, very purposefully put in her terms of service that she wouldn't draw ships. Which is fair, artists can do what they want- but I was friends with her at the time and so I knew the entire reason she had that in her terms of service was because she didn't want to draw any queer ships.

And the thing that gets me about it is that the majority of her fan base was/is queer. And so fairly frequently people would commission her to draw like 2 different bust portraits of the different halves of their gay ship- which! Good for them! But she like knew it was for ~gay shipping~ reasons and she wouldn't turn it down but she would come into the group chat and complain about how uncomfortable it made her. And how she hated how when she sold charms the most popular were always the popular fandom gay ship. Like she made/makes her entire living off of queer people. And like. Hates us. Behind the scenes where her fan base cannot see.

She would sometimes show the group chat asks she got asking if she was homophobic because it isn't actually that difficult to figure out if you pay attention. Because in spite of it all she did draw a lot of het ship art. And she would fret and worry that people would Find Out that she's. Really homophobic. And then she'd lose her entire source of income. (She would of course just delete the asks and never answer them)

And she always had such a victim complex about it too. Like The Queers were conspiring to get around her terms of service to make her, a Good Christian Woman draw their dirty little gay ships.

Like not a single thought spared for how she was profiting off of a marginalized group of people by publicly making sure she seemed totally fine with queer stuff. (In her charm sets she did always include the popular fandom gay ships, in spite of how much she complained about how she hated that people bought the charms for gay reasons) While behind closed doors she would mock and deride queer people and participate in discussions about how awful it is that queer stuff is so Normalized these days, and whatever happened to the sanctity of marriage and all that conservative evangelical bullshit.

And like I haven't interacted with her in many years, for uh. Obvious reasons. And it doesn't happen often but Every Now And Then some of her art will show up on my dash. Usually reblogged by someone openly and proudly queer, and I will just be sitting there like. Damn. You have no idea how much she hates everything about you. This sucks.

[schrodingers-catgirl]

every time i see akian hate i like akian more

[triglycercule]

yada yada happy halloween to these FREAKS (and you guys :3 and myself i gusss :3) doodle from art class that i GUESS could be considered halloween...... idk ok idk ok something was up with me when i drew this

[truethes]

“go to hell” is basic. “i hope you have the opportunity to write a romatically dense character in a situation where even you can see the other characters romantic sense” is smart. it’s possible. it’s terrifying

[unforth]

I would give so much to never have to see Jiang Cheng discourse again.