#i hate him.... what is he so pretty for
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Clark Kent looking ass..... GET HIM OFF MY SCREEN RIGHT NOW
#get away from me#UGH#i hate him.... what is he so pretty for#fuck you#ig he gives me cuteness aggression#i need to kill him#hasan thirst#shriggy talks
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I love the college of winterhold. everyone there is casually deranged and there's like an alarming number of students and staff who threaten you immediately when they meet you. it's always one of the first questlines I do. which makes it even funnier when you get made the arch-mage of the college. I'm level 12 and got through this questline knowing exactly 3 spells. what do you mean you want me to lead the college. this school CANNOT be an accredited institution
#i ask if anyone wants this job and everyone starts whistling and checking their phones#their magic phones. theyre scrolls#mia.txt#tes#skyrim#oh no wait i forgot j'zargo wants the position & actively tries to kill you (these are separate events but still probably not unrelated)#and nirya's gunning for it too. you know what maybe its a good thing im the archmage because im never there and don't do anything#i drop in every few weeks for 10 minutes then leave. the place pretty much runs itself right#reddit says “they have a bullying problem” yeah i know i married him#and he's the new boss' special little princess and he can do whatever he wants forever. call the police about it#dont bring your piddly ass problems to the archmage shes busy girlbossing (committing widescale atrocities)#(yes i know this is just how tamrielic mage guilds are but i just think its funny bc everyone fucking hates them specifically#like the rest of the town despises them and allegedly the nords have a special disdain for magic so its kind of funny that they make no#attempt to like. be more normal to gain the locals' trust#and you know what? good for them. fuck them nords)#ulothir#<- mentioned in the tags lmfao
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i was asked to give connor this and here we are
#dbh connor#dbh#detroit become human#hank anderson#i'm sorry i can't draw hot men but i'm trying rly rly#thanks for the idea more excuses to draw connor#i freaking love bryan's face he's so pretty and yet so like regular looking idk how to explain but he's so pretty#but also looking like a regular guy you could meet everyday#i have no idea how to draw him i tried many times and he's impossible#idk i hate pretty men they make me feel things bc what are you pretty for#lol
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Lestat 😼
#he’s awful#I love him#he serves in every century#I gotta draw all of the characters now#my mom gave me all 13 books#this woman hates buying books sm#she refuses to buy them cause she loves the library#but the vampire chronicles?#she NEEDED all of em#genuinely why was my mom reading about gay vampires in the 80s tho#kinda iconic tbh#I need to watch the show cause I’m pretty sure they’re putting rockstar lestat in the next season#and I NEED to see#lestat de lioncourt#the vampire lestat#the vampire chronicles#interview with the vampire#iwtv#iwtv lestat#rockstar lestat#lestat fanart#lestat de lyingcunt#THAT TAGS SO FUNNY WHAT#digital art#art#comicart#my art#book!lestat#vampires#azuree1733
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It was supposed to be Till till the end 😭😭
#digital art#alien stage#alnst#alnst till#ivantill#alnst luka#🤢🤮#god i hate him#he is so pretty#AND FOR WHAT#video#blink gone#my art
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How awful do you have to be for Heaven to nickname you “the three tumors” when Feng Xin and Mu Qing are around constantly destroying the capital while everyone laughs about it??
Ling Wen, Shi Wudu, and Pei Ming. What did you do??
#I mean yea I KNOW what they did#but that’s just so iconic okay#feng Xin and mu Qing are knwn for mass destruction and all the officials are giggling as they watch placing bets#the three tumors on the other hand are considered terrors even though I’m pretty sure they DONT cause mass destruction and chaos#and at that point no one even KNOWS what Shi Wudu did to He Xuan they just all hate him because he’s a dick#feng xin#fengqing#mu qing#pei ming#ling wen#shi wudu#mxtx tgcf#tgcf#tgcf donghua#tgcf manhua#tgcf spoilers#tgcf novel#tgcf season 2#tgcf mu qing#tgcf feng xin#tgcf fengqing#tgcf pei ming#tgcf shi wudu#heaven official's blessing#heaven officials blessing#heaven official’s blessing#mxtx novels#mxtx#mxtx characters#mxtx fandom
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how we feelin about tincrow
I hate gay people
#I have thoughts about both their book versions and their wicked versions#I think book tincrow is pretty self explanatory. just look at them#for wicked tincrow I have a lot more thoughts on#I kinda like that fact that misery is inherent to every romance boq has experienced#His crush on Glinda and Nessa's crush on him both caused him to literally lose everything. his life. his body. his hope at a future.#also I think making Boq straight is really really funny.#Despite everything... he still likes girls...#but like after all that hes not willing to pursue anyone anymore#which is why I think it is so funny to put him and the only person he hates nearly as much as elphaba in a room together#in the sense that they are both now immortals who've had the exact same extremely traumatic experience of losing their bodies#Boq is explosively miserable but Fiyero is the only one who understands what its like and what hes going through#Even if Boq would still assert that hes going through worse and mad about everything that happened with Glinda#he does have to simmer down eventually. even he can only be mad for so long#enemies to worlds worst qpr. do you understand what im saying#Sorry I like sprinkling a little aromanticism on everything I touch
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☆ even the gods bleed [ pt 2 ]
{☆} characters furina, neuvillette {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, multi-chapter, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings none {☆} word count 1.9k {☆} previous [ 1 ]
This had to be a punishment of some sort – some kind of divine punishment.
She was bored out of her mind just watching the sleeping body – she hadn't blinked once in the past five hours, her eyes were really starting to hurt. Yet they still hadn't moved so much as an inch since she sequestered them away to the only place she had known to be safe.
But it'd been almost a week since then.
The only solace she found was that Teyvat had seemed much less hellbent on collapsing in on itself like a dying star.
That counted for something.
Not much, but something!
..Even if their position was no better then it was a week ago.
There was, after all, still the issue of what to do about the false Creator – the actual imposter – and the Archons following them like blind lambs. The other Archons wouldn't listen if she tried to reason with them, and it would only risk the life of Divine One if she spoke of their location to anyone else.
She also was pretty fond of having her head still attached to her shoulders.
So she avoided them all together. Partially because she wasn't sure she wouldn't have a breakdown at the sight of them..she'd never been a fighter, and fighting an Archon? Easy pass.
Instead she was forced to babysit the sleeping Divine until they woke up while Neuvillette handled taking care of the nation and dealing with the other Archons – and by extension the false Creator.
Really though, she would almost think them dead if not for the subtle rise and fall of their chest.
Though..this also left her with a lot of time to herself. A lot of time to think.
She really didn't like it.
There wasn't a lot to occupy her mind and what little there was only distracted her for a scant few moments before her eyes drifted back to the Divine like she was locked in their orbit, unable to escape.
She closed the same book for the twelfth time – she kept count – and returned it to it's meticulously designed place within her bookcase. A low, barely audible huff of frustration escaped her lips before she could bite it down, her stare boring a hole into the body of the Divine One with a sharp intensity she rarely showed.
She was tired, bored and constantly on edge, fearing that at any moment someone would find out about their presence here.
That, at the drop of a hat, she would be powerless to stop the greatest tragedy of her time play out before her eyes.
Neuvillette would have scolded her for being so petulant, especially around the Divine One, if he were here.
But he wasn't.
He was out running her nation, instead.
And what was she doing? Nothing!
She grit her teeth, nails digging harshly into the palm of her hands as she took a deep breath – now was not the time to think about that. She had..much more pressing matters. Sulking and letting her thoughts spiral helped no one, least of all herself.
Yet her attention was caught by a harsh inhale, the rustle of fabric – were they finally waking up? She was exhausted, but it all vanished at the sudden drop of life within the otherwise deathly still body of the Divine.
Her eyes followed the subtle twitch of their fingers, watching as their brow furrowed and their features twisted in something almost like..pain.
..She wasn't ready.
What was she supposed to say?
Should she even say anything? Would that be considered impolite? Does she wait for them to speak first? Should she kneel? Bow?
She doesn't get much time to find her own answer before their lashes flutter, chest heaving with every strangled breath. Every single thought vanishes from her mind the moment she meets their eyes.
For a long, silent moment she thinks that her heart must have stopped.
Their eyes glow like the cresting of the sun over the horizon, painting the world in hues of gold – yet it also reminded her of the dipping of the moon below the waves, casting the briefest, most gentle of lights upon the world engulfed in darkness. In the depths of their eyes was the birth and death of stars in the infinite cosmos – glittering stars in a sea of empty, blank space that left her feeling lightheaded and breathless.
Beneath the splendor is a spark of recognition in their eyes so vibrant it was like a shooting star piercing through the dark night sky, leaving nothing but the wonder in the eyes of the observer as the only proof it ever existed – brilliant in it's beauty, however brief.
It is the most beautiful thing she has ever seen.
"Focalors?"
The lilt of their voice nearly made her knees buckle beneath her – euphoria so consuming it left her feeling she was starving swallowed her whole, her mind blanking in a moment of utter bliss. It was..an indescribable feeling that she doubted she could ever hope to put into words – not in a way that could properly express it, try as she might.
She swallowed the words that threatened to spill from her lips – she couldn't make a fool of herself. Not in front of them of all people. She'd never forgive herself.
"Divine One," She rasps, clearing her throat and covering her mouth with a hand to mask both her nervousness and the small smile that creeps across her face. She quickly regains her composure, hand resting on her hip as she puffs out her chest with every bit of pride she can manage. "I am sure you must be confused, but worry not– your most loyal acolyte has seen the truth!"
The silence is deafening.
She opens one eye, peaking at the bewildered and almost distraught expression of the Divine.
"What the hell are you talking about?"
That..she was not prepared for. Surely they knew who they were! Surely they knew. They had to– she's been praying to them for as long as she's breathed, she's dedicated every hour of her life to living up to their ideals, they can't just–!
"Lady Furina?"
Neuvillette, thankfully, spares her the embarrassment of having a meltdown in front of the Divine, the gentle rap of his knuckles against the door making her and the Divine pause, the soft lull of his voice soothing her nerves and yet setting her on edge at the same time.
"Neuvillette." She clears her throat again, her steps hurried as she marches to the door and pries it open none too gently, a forced smile pulling at her lips. She wastes no time tugging the man into the room, shutting the door behind him with a short huff. The silence is, somehow, even worse then before as the three of them stare at each other in absolute exasperation.
Neuvillette, for his part, manages to get his act together with a sharp clearing of his throat, bowing so low even she looks unnerved. She steals a brief glance at the Divine, and she's taken aback by the uncomfortability twisting their features into a grimace.
Their expression is schooled back into one of empty apathy when he stands back to his full height, but she saw it – she knows she did! Did they not like their worship? Were they not respectful enough? For a moment, she feared the Divine would smite Neuvillette down on the spot..but they just stared at him like he was a ghost.
"Why aren't you killing me?"
The defeated, resigned tone combined with the way their voice cracks makes her heart ache in her chest – it feels as though her entire world is crumbling down at her feet, and she cannot explain why she feels such emotions so strongly, but it is suffocating. It is almost as if Teyvat itself is weeping, bearing down upon her shoulders like a heavy weight.
She feels the urge to weep herself, but she powers through, gritting her teeth long enough for Neuvillette to take his place at the side of her – though it feels more like their – bed, kneeling like he was going to pray.
"Divine One," He offers a hand with a quiet rumble of his voice, the words slipping off his tongue like honey. It's like trying to soothe a stray cat..though she'd never voice such comparisons of the most Divine out loud. "I..we mean you no harm. I swear on my authority as the Iudex of Fontaine and Chief Justice that you are safe with us."
The skepticism she expected, but the reverence in which Neuvillette must convince them – or perhaps they are simply so tired that they simply did not care any longer if it was all some ploy to drive a knife between their ribs. She didn't expect them to actually place their hand in Neuvillette's.
He didn't either, judging by the way he visibly brightened – not that they'd notice, but she did.
..Not that she could really blame him, her heels clicking against the floorboards as she shifted her weight to the other foot with a nervous energy that was practically bursting at the seams, more then a little jealous of the attention he was receiving. She was the one who found them, she was the one who stayed with them the entire time..but he gets all the attention?
How unfair.
"O-of course! We would never lay a hand on our creator," She adds, her voice a little higher pitched then she would have liked as she placed her hands on her hips, puffing out her chest and brushing off the sting of jealousy. "Least of all I– your most loyal, most devout acolyte!"
She felt baffled when she heard the sound of their laughter, her shoulders hunching and her cheeks flushing on mere instinct – she was expecting mockery, but the look in their eyes, still dulled by a pain she cannot even begin to imagine, made her hesitate.
..It was, perhaps, the most genuine thing she'd heard from them ever since before the hunt began.
She wasn't sure why her heart hurt at such an idea, but it was enthralling to see the beginnings of a half hearted smile on their lips.
For a moment, her mask of theatrics was forgotten as she stared at them in a mixture of awe and adoration– and though she didn't look at Neuvillette, she could imagine he must've shared such an expression.
Had she any doubts that they were her Creator, that they alone were the most Divine..they would wiped clean now. There was no mistaking the way the world itself seemed to grow clearer as they glanced up at her like she was worth something.
For a moment, she realized how cold the false Creators gaze had been now that she has felt warmth so gentle it almost made her knees buckle beneath her. It felt like a pale imitation, now.
Nothing could compare to the warmth that spread through her body at the mere semblance of a smile upon their lips. She didn't even mind if it was her they were laughing at anymore, she just wanted to hear them laugh again.
She'd make a fool of herself, if she had to.
She'd never felt so..ravenous for such a thing, but just the briefest glimpse was addictive.
She simply couldn't help herself from striding across the room and clasping their free hand in her own, her smile wide enough to unnerve as she leaned her weight onto the bed. For a moment, she considered pulling away at the way they startled, but her mind was made up by then – there was no going back.
"Again."
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#fic tag#neuvillette#focalors#furina#dont ask what happened here idk#this was. also supposed 2 be neuvi focused and then i.#dont talk 2 me abt focalors i wont ever shut up#got a 300k word essay on hand abt how i feel abt her character/how i interpret her personality and her story#focalors jsut like me fr fr (cries at the slightest inconvenience or the slightest mean comment)#shes so pathetic girlfail im gonna chew on her#what happens when reader gets stuck with two emotionally repressed french bastards?? hell#neuvi is the “emotionless” flavor of emotionally repressed in that hes HORRIBLE at showing emotions at all#ask him to smile and its incredibly unnerving and theres too many teeth but hes trying his best please call him pretty or he will cry :(#furina is the flavor of emotionally repressed where she makes it up by having Too Many emotions#using theatrics and masks to show everyone what they want to see but inside this girl is a MESS#constant anxiety and panic 24/7#will do random shit and look at you and if u dont compliment her she will think u hate her and cry#compliment her and she'll do even stupider shit to try and impress you more#i love my scrunkly little babies they r so stupid and mentally ill someone get these bitches some THERAPY#i want 2 put them under a microscope#watch this be ooc fr furina when more of her lore drops if shes not girlfail im leaving#anyway see u in a week im going on a trip ill get back 2 u in 6-7 business days
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Personally what I like best in terms of who’s older between Donnie and Leo is just them never knowing for sure BUT imagine Leo going up to Draxum and saying he’ll never bring up the roof incident again if Draxum tells Donnie that Leo’s the older twin.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt headcanons#rise donnie#rise leo#rise draxum#donnie would be so mad he would be SURE Leo had something to do with this#and Leo would just be like idk what to tell you bro Draxum said what he said#I’m pretty sure somewhere it was stated that Leo is the older one?#but tbh if I had to pick it’s just more interesting for Leo - the one who’s alwaysss the oldest in other iterations - to be second youngest#not that there’s like any difference tbh they’re so close in age that it doesn’t change much EXCEPT who has older/younger sib rights#it also makes Raph and Leo’s dynamic more interesting too since in fiction it usually is the oldest and second oldest fighting it out#again though I’m pretty sure canon says Leo is older#my personal pref is just never knowing#and if I HAD to pick then older Donnie is more interesting#I also like older donnie because it moves him up closer to April and I like that#but yeah - overall not knowing is best#oh yeah and Leo being second youngest also makes another interesting dynamic with Mikey as well#because you’d have Leo who never gets the gentle treatment opposed with Mikey who hates getting the gentle babying treatment
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you are umasou
#I watched it today it was so good#im not big on dinosaur stuff but i like how it was used to approach the predator/prey conversation especially when both sides are sentient#instead of just defaulting to well since predators are meat eaters their actions are automatically immoral so their role in the story#has to match. and then when your characters /are/ meat eaters you just step around that whole topic#heart knows he has to kill and eat so there’s no avoiding it but even he knows he has agency over that#hell he even decided to hunt by himself so umasou doesn’t have to see him kill and eat another dinosaur a day after meeting him#and maybe its because it’s a kids movie but it also doesn’t make a big show over the act of hunting and eating. it doesn’t dwell on it#like yes you can clearly see them ripping into guts minus the graphic details but it doesnt go out of its way to censor it either#its played straight just like hearts mom having more kids like nobody asks who the father is or when that happened cuz it doesn’t matter#what matters is she still loves heart and encourages her kids to greet their big brother and they do!!! it’s sweet#Beckon was also an interesting touch bc they make it clear the only reason he doesnt eat umasou is bc he cant and not that he wouldn’t#but he’s still a funny and interesting character and that doesn’t get in the way of how we see him too much#same for baku he was pretty polite with heart esp from the start when he asks him if hes abandoned implying he would be prepared to#look out for him from the start. and at the end when he decides to spare him. I dont hate him at all hes just intimidating#you are umasou#doodles#I wanted to draw smth more detailed but I couldn’t decide if I wanted to go with the cartoony art style#or smth closer to realistic?? so this is like. some sort of compromise I guess
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inner child
#world of warcraft#anduin wrynn#the war within#struggling to explain what im trying to capture here#I think for the longest time I believed adulthood hit when the child you was no more#so until recently i refused to accept that my childhood had ended#But the truth is that child-you kinda just hands adult-you the wheel of the car but they're still there and messing with the radio#anyway I imagine Anduin's inner child self and what his opinion is of everything that has happened#AdultAnduin believing his childself would hate him but he actually looks up to him with some sortve concerned awe#also the background looks like what i see when i close my eyes and i think represents in one's headspace pretty well#i think i used something similiar in an ealier piece of him panicing and#it just works so well when covering mental stuff
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What I really enjoy about Luke and Maryse's interactions in City of Ashes is that they clearly grew up separate from each other. Both of them are in their late thirties, but they hold this image in their heads of who the other was when they were teenagers, when they were enthralled by Valentine's hateful rhetoric.
From how he describes them to Clary, it's clear that Luke looks down on the Lightwoods. He says that they were Valentine's closest lieutenants and the most dedicated to his doctrine, and yet he ignores the fact that he was Valentine's second-in-command for most of the Circle's existence. He knows that he had doubts at the time and then grew into a kind and accepting adult, but Robert and Maryse appeared dedicated to Valentine from the outside and have been separate from Luke ever since, so to him they must still be as cruel as they ever were. He sees himself as superior because he got out first, but forgets that he stuck around until Valentine literally told him to kill himself, while Robert and Maryse surrendered to the Clave voluntarily.
Then there's Maryse, who's still bitter over Luke's betrayal. Not because he turned against Valentine, but because he and Jocelyn set a trap that ended with every member of the Circle (other than the Lightwoods, Hodge, and Michael) being killed by the combined forces of the Clave and the Downworlders. Of course Maryse is being pretty hypocritical here, since she was fully in on the plan to murder a bunch of unarmed diplomats, but she does have a point that Luke and Jocelyn did nothing to protect their former friends. Their plan saved lives in the long run, but it resulted in far more bloodshed that night than Valentine's simple massacre.
After Valentine's supposed death, Jocelyn, Luke, Robert, and Maryse all went into a sort of retirement in New York City. For Luke and Jocelyn it was their mundane employment and for Maryse and Robert is was their place as Institute heads, but both couples spent fifteen years raising their kids and learning to be better people. By the time we see them in TMI, all four former circle members had come to terms with how atrocious Valentine had been and dedicated themselves to doing better with their adult lives, but since it happened in relative isolation, they all still remember each other as they were at age twenty. To Maryse, Luke is still the man who left his friends to die, and to Luke, Maryse is still the woman who stuck by a murderer until the end.
I just think it's very interesting that there are so few survivors of the Circle left in 2007, and barely any of them communicate with each other at all. Amatis was left alone in Idris, Hodge felt so abandoned by the Clave that he went back to Valentine, Robert and Maryse trapped themselves in a loveless marriage rather than give up the illusion of stability they'd built for their kids, Luke and Jocelyn denied their past until it came to find them, and Michael was killed with his family in a scheme that would never have worked if a single person came to check up on him in the ten years Valentine inhabited his life. They could have found a community through this common experience, but instead they saw each other as monsters for the things they all did.
#i say that i was the secret treasons (and i do) but a lot of what i find fascinating about the circle depends upon their adult lives#luke and maryse both love their kids more than anything and see each other as the hateful youths from whom their family should be protected#i might be repeating myself a lot but whatever#i am having thoughts#by the way in case it wasn't clear#i adore both luke and maryse (but especially maryse) as characters and i think they're both great parents#i also love robert and jocelyn#morally gray characters who did awful things but are trying to do better <3#i might have the timeline wrong for michael but i'm pretty sure that he wasn't at the circle's attack on the accords#and then valentine killed him eliza and jonathan while they were at home that night#so he could burn their bodies alongside jocelyn's parents in fairchild manor#the shadowhunter chronicles#shadowhunters#tsc#the mortal instruments#the secret treasons#luke garroway#luke graymark#maryse trueblood#maryse lightwood#robert lightwood#jocelyn fairchild#valentine morgenstern#oh boy i barely even touched on hodge and amatis but you better believe i've got thoughts about them too#my analysis
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Me: Ooooo, I wonder what this "Mouthwashing" thing is that everyone's been obsessed with lately. I should check some of it out.
Me, 30 minutes later: I would kill myself for you, Anya.
#i'm so obsessed with her#you don't even understand#i love her so much#she deserved better#she deserves the world#mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#anya deserved better#anya deserved so much more#anya my beloved#mouthwashing game#look at her#i love her#fuck jimmy#all my homies hate jimmy#i will stab him for what he did to my girl#i will rip him apart with my mouth#she deserves to stab him to death at least a little bit#but honestly i love anya for so many reasons#not only is her plotline interesting and tragic as hell and she deserves better#but she is a legitimately interesting person and character outside of what happened to her#her dedication to her job and the fact that she was able to keep curly alive by herself for so long is extremely admirable#and i've heard about how she can act pretty playful and fun when outside of situations like the one she was in throughout the game#i really wish we got to see that side of her more#because it seems like her anxious and more timid personality is a bit of a trauma response which is understandable#so yeah i love her and i want to give her a pat on the head and a hug and maybe a gentle kiss on the forehead if she's okay with it#i prefer to comfort others via physical affection and i want to comfort her so badly#i don't know if i'd be the most helpful if i were a crewmate who learned what happened to her#(my way of helping would be offering to murder jimmy and i'm not sure if she'd want that because not all victims want that)#and sometimes physical affection/hug aren't helpful or preferred
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Sometimes, you just gotta sit back and draw this a-hole✨
#oh no I GAVE HIM SIX FINGERS?!?!#AUGHHHH PLEASE IGNORE THAT :'))#I both hate him but absolutely love him at the same time lol#Like no#YOU DON'T JUST TRICK GONTA AND GET AWAY WITH IT#I MEAN GONTA!! BEST BOI LIL CINNAMON ROLL#WHO DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG WHATSOEVER#but like hes still funny and antagonistic so I guess he's my favourite hehe#currently finished chapter 5 by da way#AGHHH I LOVE THIS SERIES SO FRICKING MUCH-#kokichi ouma#drv3 kokichi#danganronpa killing harmony#ndrv3#killing harmony#danganronpa#art#rendering is actually pretty fun though#i don't know what possessed me to make this#also I SPENT AN EMBARRASSINGLY LONG TIME ON HIS HAIR AGHH#But I somehow managed to figure it out yass
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[ Reflection ] About yourself.
Was listening to Shunkan Sentimental by SCANDAL at like 10 p.m. and stayed up until 4 a.m. to work on this. I didn't finish it right away tho, I still had to sleep.
Two extras below read more!
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#Asa draws#my art#fan art#kirby#Meta Knight#Dark Meta Knight#I don't talk often of my thoughts on Meta and Darmeta and how the mirror functions#I like to believe the Amazing Mirror was once a tool for people to achieve dreams. wishes#slightly like Nova but not quite. the mirror could not bring these wishes to reality. you could only walk into the mirror#and face the outcomes of what you wished for#and maybe it was like this for some time until the mirror got corrupted#and maybe Meta looked once into the mirror. but never walked in#thinking of an easier time#In a way#Darmeta is the outcome of what would have happened if Meta had taken another path#if he had never gone to Popstar#They don't really like eachother. Meta because of what Darmeta represents to him and Darmeta because one of the outcomes of being-#-someone's reflection is holding some of their memories and feelings#and Darmeta. well... he doesn't really like that#I like of think of them having gone past the point of being just enemies and hating each other for things they cannot control and instead-#instead they work well together#they still just *tolerate* each other#but the advantage of knowing so much of another person is that you know how they work#so they actually make a pretty good team on a good day
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I'm sorry I let down my guard.
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#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#xue yang#xiao xingchen#God DAMN this scene was brutal. Season 2 episode 2 is almost nothing but misery and anguish#Helena by Nickle Creek does not quite fit the comic's vibe but it is absolutely a Xue Yang song so I linked it.#The change from “Helena don't walk away...(gentle)” to “HELENA. DON'T WALK AWAY (threat)” is fantastic.#And “Don't waste your pretty sympathy - I'll always be just fine”. Xue Yang core.#Okay now for the real meat. Disclaimer first: *I really like XY.* I think he's a great character. I think his actions consistently-#come from a place of deep trauma. While his reactions and actions put him in a villainous role he is still human about his hurt#and what I'm about to say is NOT intended to be a statement of causality or villianize a group of misunderstood people.#So with that said...Man oh man does Xue Yang have a lot of BPD traits. More that just 'character who is chronically manipulative'.#The impulsivity and emotional reactions and seeking stability makes him feel like he needs that control. What other choice is there?#The part that really gets me is how he *wants* to be safe and happy. But his past experiences tell him how thats impossible#He's the kind of person who goes 'if you don't like me then you better hate me for something substantial". All (pos) or All (neg)#''Love me entirely or Hate me. But don't you dare leave me or forget about me.''#Not at all comfortable saying 'BPD coded'. Im not a psychiatrist. Just that he has TRAITS. Feel free to disagree or add your thoughts.#ppl with bpd also are not a monolith and everyone has very different experiences. Xue yang is very complex. People more so.
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