#i guess when you have kids you wake up that early on christmas

[freebooter4ever]

waking up at 7am like normal on my days off and then patiently waiting till 11am to text my friends here because im nice like that

[honeyedmiller]

Traditions | Joel Miller

pairing: husband!joel x wife!reader

rating: explicit. 18+ only.

warnings: husband!joel, joel is handsy af in this, no outbreak!joel, au where joel doesn’t have kids, mentions of christmas, tooth-rotting fluff bc joel and reader are just so in love, smut (body worship, unprotected piv, m oral receiving, riding, reader praises the fuck out of joel bc he deserves it, breeding kink), brief talk of having kids, no use of y/n.

a/n: sorry this was kinda poorly written. this wasn't revised, so apologies for any mistakes. hope you enjoy ~

word count: 4k

synopsis: you and joel make holiday traditions in your new home.

divider by the incredibly talented @saradika 🤎

The early December sun bled through the cream curtains of your bedroom, stirring you awake. You softly groaned at the world’s way of waking you up, pleading just five more minutes in your thoughts. Your eyes slowly peeled open as you took a deep breath, stretching your limbs to try and wake your tired body up. A couple of bones popped in the process, loosening up your post-sleep stiffness. 

An arm weighed heavy across your waist, and you turned your head to find your husband snoring lightly, still deep in his slumber. You smile softly as your eyes run over his features. He looked so peaceful while he slept, not a worry in the world etched within the lines of his face. 

You turned on your side so you were facing him, bringing your hand up to softly trace the features on his face. The alarm clock on his nightstand that you could barely see over his broad shoulders read 8:20. Normally, you two loved to sleep in at least one day during the weekend. You wish you could stay in this blissful little cocoon of warmth and sleepiness and content, all while being held by your husband. 

But, to your misfortune (and truthfully, to Joel’s too), you had errands you needed to run today–one of which included getting Christmas decorations for your house. You and Joel had moved into this new house during the summertime, so you needed to re-up on decorations as Christmas was nearing the corner. 

“Joel, honey, it’s time to wake up.” Your voice was soft, not wanting to startle him awake. His eyebrows quickly twitched as they threaded together. He groaned softly, refusing to open his eyes. 

“What time is it?” He mumbles, turning his head to kiss the palm of your hand that now rested on his cheek. 

“Almost eight thirty, baby. We have to get up. We have errands to run today.” You reminded him, and he groaned again as he shook his head. 

“Five more minutes.” You softly chuckled at his response. You and him really were two peas in a pod. 

“Uh, uh, c’mon cowboy. Up n’ at ‘em.” Your hand travels down to his chest, patting it twice as you try to pull yourself away from him. 

Joel tugs you back and pulls you closer to him so your chest is flush against his, and he buries his face into the crook of your neck. You card your fingers through his hair gradually, pressing a kiss to his forehead. 

“I want to stay in bed as much as you do, but the sooner we get these errands done the sooner we can come back and relax.” You try to reason with him, and he lets out an exasperated sigh. 

“Fine. I guess I’ll get up.” 

“I’ll make breakfast after I shower so we won’t leave on empty stomachs.” You reassure him, knowing that your breakfast was the one thing he usually looked forward to on Saturday mornings. 

“Why make breakfast when I have a delicious meal riiight,” He pauses, flipping you on your back so he's hovering over you. He leans down and his lips brush your ear, the coarse hair of his mustache and stubble tickling your soft skin. “Here.” He whispers, kissing your neck as his hand travels down the curves of your body, dangerously close to the place you were most desperate for him. 

A whimper bubbled in your throat, but you shook your head and playfully smacked his arm. 

“Joel Miller, you’re a naughty man.” You laugh, and his face hovers above yours once more. 

“And you’re a naughtier woman,” He smirks, kissing you once. “Naughtiness deserves a punishment, hm?” 

“If naughtiness deserves punishment, does that mean I get to smack your cute ass too?” Mischief was written all over your features, but Joel’s brows turned downward. 

“Don’t even think about it, sweet girl, or I’ll deny you.” 

You quirk your brow at him. “Deny me of what, exactly?” 

“Me. My cock that you seem to fuckin’ love so much.” He shrugs, as if any part of this conversation was nonchalant. 

You decided to tease him further, seeing how far you’d get. “I hate to inform you, Mr. Miller, I do have some handy dandy trustee ‘ol vibrators stashed away that can do the job just fine.” 

He clenched his jaw at your words, rolling his eyes. “Ever the smart fuckin’ mouth on you, eh?” He chuckles, knowing you’d immediately fold for him and let him take care of you much better than your pink and purple toys can. 

“Isn’t that why you married me?” You can’t wipe the stupid grin off of your face as he buries his head into your neck. 

“Mm, one of the reasons,” He moves his hands up to your breasts underneath the shirt you were wearing, squeezing the soft flesh generously. “‘S okay darlin’. I know you only married me for my skills in the bedroom.” 

“Ah, ya got me there.” You throw your hands up in surrender, and Joel lets out a hearty laugh. He moves his hands from underneath your shirt up to your wrists, pinning them down to the bed as he leans down to kiss you. 

“You sure we can’t just stay in bed and y’know, let me put my amazing bedroom skills to use?” Joel juts his bottom lip out and pouts, and you can’t help but laugh at how persistent he was. 

“No, my love. We really do have to run these errands.” You run your hand through his brown curls, pushing yourself up to kiss him before wiggling out from under him. He collapses onto the bed with a groan, slowly making his way out from the array of your fluffy comforter, blankets, and pillows. 

He stands in front of you, wrapping his arms around your waist as he kisses your forehead. 

“Last person to reach the shower has to make a pot of coffee!” You giggle as you run to your master bathroom, Joel right on your heels. 

“I don’t think so, missy.” He wraps his arms around your waist and picks you up, moving you behind him so he can reach the shower first. 

“Asshole!” You laugh, eyes squinted as you swat his arm. 

“Yeah, but you love me.” Joel winks at you and you roll your eyes, quirking a brow at him as he turns on the shower to a temperature comfortable for you both. 

“That I do, Mr. Miller. That I do.” 

-

Joel ended up making the pot of coffee anyhow after you both showered and got ready for the day. You gratefully thanked your loving husband as he poured both yours and his serving into two thermoses before you set out for the day. 

You had a game plan in your mind, because the quicker you got these errands done, the quicker you’d be able to change into sweats and watch a Christmas movie. First stop was getting gas. You offered Joel for you to pump the gas, but he refused and begrudgingly reminded you that as long as you were with him, you wouldn’t ever be touching a gas pump again. 

Next stop was the local bakery. You needed a restock on the fresh bread they baked, and every holiday season, they made pastries that were absolutely delectable. 

After you left the bakery, you needed to go to Target to get the majority of your Christmas decorations. You drove in a comfortable silence, Joel’s hand securely on your thigh as he drove. A soft country song was playing over the radio, and you looked out of the window to see many stores and houses already decorated for the holidays. You smiled at the sight, loving this time of year more than anything. 

“What’s on your mind, pretty girl?” Joel breaks the silence as he looks over at you when you reach a red light. You look at him, admiring his handsome features before leaning over the center console to kiss him. 

“Nothing in particular, baby. Can’t wait to decorate our house.” You smile at him, and he gives your thigh a soft squeeze. 

When you arrived at Target, it took everything in you to not run to the Christmas section to scour for the perfect decorations. Joel could sense your excitement, and he chuckled as he got a cart to give to you. Joel had to take bigger strides to keep up with how fast you were moving, but he couldn’t help but adore the excitement that overtook you. 

There were so many options for decorations, you didn’t even know where to start. You were examining some ornaments when Joel wrapped his arms around your waist, resting his chin on your shoulder. 

“See any you like?” He asks, turning his head to kiss your cheek. 

“Should we stick with the classic red ornaments? I think they’re so pretty, but multicolored ornaments would go good with our tree since we have the white lights around it.” 

Truthfully, Joel had no idea decorating for Christmas would be full of so many options. Before you moved into your house, you and Joel lived in an apartment that barely had room for a four foot tree. Now you had more than plenty of room for various decorations that were going to stay with you both for years and years to come, encapsulating new traditions within the four walls of your home. 

“Let’s do classic red. We can get multicolored ones next year.” Joel kisses your shoulder before standing up behind you, rubbing circles into your soft, sweater-covered waist. 

You nod in agreement, putting the ornaments in the cart. You pick up a few other things including an ornament that has two wedding rings interlinked with a ‘forever yours’ engraved at the bottom, Joel insisting it needs to be put up on the front of the tree. 

“So do I get to unwrap you as my present this year?” Joel’s lips brushed your ear, sending a shiver down your spine. 

You laugh at his joke, rolling your eyes. “Such a cheeseball, I swear.” You huff, and he holds his hands up. 

“What, I can’t admire my beautiful wife in some sexy lingerie then gladly take it off of her?” 

“I’ll let you if you buy it for me. Last time I bought a pretty set, you literally ripped it off of me. You’re a menace, Mr. Miller.” You give him a fake stern glare, reencountering your husband’s inability to be patient and take the pretty pink set you liked so much off of you. 

“Fine. Fair point. Maybe I’ll get you some for Christmas.” 

Joel slots his hand in yours and gives it a squeeze, and a soft smile curls onto your lips. 

“C’mon, let’s look at the trees.” 

-

“A little to the left.” You tell Joel as he hangs up some garland you found on your trip. He does as told, moving to the left before you stop him and tell him it’s perfect. He steps off the stepstool he was on, wrapping his arm around your waist as he observes his handiwork. 

It was five in the evening now, and Joel had just finished putting up the last of the decorations. Your living room basked in a soft yellow light, complimentary of the Christmas tree and the fireplace. 

You were in awe that your living room looked so festive and warm. Owning your own home with the love of your life was something you’ve always dreamed of, and decorating it for one of your favorite holidays had your heart feeling all fuzzy and warm. It was cliché and you knew it, but you couldn’t help yourself. 

You looked up at Joel with a proud smile. His dark eyes reflected the soft lights and the fire as he stared back at you, eyebrows creasing together. 

“What?” He chuckles, pulling you in closer. You grin as you rest your hands onto his solid chest, sliding them up until they intertwine at the back of his neck. 

“Just grateful I have such a hardworking, loving man.” You kiss him briefly, and his hands slide from your waist and down to your ass before you have a chance to pull away. He hums against your lips as he squeezes your pillowy flesh, causing you to gasp. He took that as the perfect opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth, softly groaning as his hands started to roam furiously. A giggle bubbled in your throat, and he nearly whined when you pulled away from him. 

“So needy, Mr. Miller.” 

“You still owe me a chance to show you my neat bedroom skills, Mrs. Miller.” He retorts, recalling the conversation you had with him this morning. 

“Mm, that I do,” Your eyes glance down to the fireplace, tilting your head in curiosity. “Can we try a new location?” Your pleading eyes look into his as you bat your lashes, knowing Joel always gave in when you gave him that look. 

“And where would that place be?” 

You nod your head down next to the fireplace. “I think it’ll be romantic.” You shrug, and Joel laughs. 

“It does, baby, but you know my knees and back ain’t what they used to be.” 

“Who said you’d be doing the work?” You quirk a brow up at him, a sly smile curling onto your lips. Joel’s cock throbbed at the thought of his pretty little wife taking care of him. 

“Darlin’, are you sure? You don’t have to.” He shakes his head, knowing he gets off just on pleasuring you alone. 

“Can’t your wife show you how much she appreciates her hardworking man?” You take his hand and tug on it, grabbing two pillows from your couch before tossing them on the carpet near the fireplace. 

“Fuck, baby. ‘M so goddamn lucky.” Joel groans, kissing your temple. You pull him in for a kiss as you begin to unbutton his favorite flannel, sliding the worn material off of his broad shoulders. His skin was warm beneath your touch, so inviting and full of life. Home. 

Your nails lightly scratched down his soft torso. He was slightly insecure about his tummy, but you loved it. More of him for you to love. 

You begin to trail your kisses down his neck, nipping at his collarbone and chest as you fumble with his belt buckle. You get it undone, sliding the leather through the loops in his jeans and tossing it on the floor before undoing his button and zipper. He takes the liberty of shucking his jeans off himself, standing before you in nothing but his boxers. 

Your eyes roamed his body hungrily, licking your lips as you trailed your gaze back up to his. Joel’s breathing began to slightly quicken, getting too turned on for his own good just by your lustful stare. 

“So handsome,” You whisper. “Lay down for me, baby.” And he does. He situates himself so his head is propped up on a pillow, staring at you. 

“No fair that I’m nearly naked and you’re still fully dressed.” He playfully pouts, and you laugh. You easily discard your warm sweater over your head and let it pool to the floor with the rest of Joel’s clothes. Your pants follow suit so you’re just left in your bra and panties, and Joel’s dark eyes admire the sight before him. 

“C’mere baby.” He says, holding a hand out to you. Your hand slots in his and he tugs you down so you’re level with him. He grabs your hips and maneuvers you until you’re straddling his hips. 

The flames illuminate his face, softening his features in a way that makes you fall in love with him even more. 

Your gaze moves down to his plush lips before moving back up to his eyes, smiling in the slightest before moving down to kiss him again. One of his hands moves to cup the back of your neck, pushing you further into him to deepen the kiss. You moan softly and can’t help yourself when you slowly start to grind your hips into his, clothed clit catching his bulge just right. 

The whole thing is cathartic, wanting to prove to him how much you appreciate him and everything he does for you, though he already knows it. 

“I love you.” You mumble against his lips, and separate yourself from him to nose at his scruffy jawline to litter soft kisses among his jaw. You move down to his neck, licking a long stripe up a spot that drives him absolutely crazy. His hands grip your hips tighter, the cool metal of his wedding band pressing into your hot skin. 

“I love you–too, fuck, love you too, baby.” He can’t control the noises that fall from his throat as you suck onto his collarbone and chest in the slightest, tongue soothing over the areas you’ve bitten. 

You make your way down his torso, making sure to kiss his stomach a few times before looking up at him. 

“You’re so handsome, my love.” 

Your lips are back on his skin and Joel’s heart fucking flutters. You’re the only woman in the world that can make him feel so adored, so appreciated, so loved. Your praise always gets to him. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever find the right words to tell you what your words do to him. 

Your lips find purchase near his happy trail, poking your tongue out to lick his skin just before the waistline of his boxers. You grab the elastic band, tapping his hips gently. He lifts his hips for you and you easily slide the underwear off his body. He cradles your cheek for a few seconds, admiring how pretty you look. 

You look down at his weeping cock, pre cum bedaubed on his tip. You take his length gently in your hand, giving it a couple of tugs before moving your head down to kiss his thighs. It was rare when you had opportunities to worship Joel’s body like this, so you were going to take advantage of it. 

He only ever got to be soft and slow with your body, never giving himself the grace to allow you to do the same for him. He always made sure your pleasure came first, but tonight, and many more if the stubborn man would let you, his pleasure came first. You wanted to make him feel just as good as he makes you feel. 

You drag your lips up to the apex of his thigh, kissing his hot skin until you get to the base of his cock. You moved your lips to his tip, kissing it once before licking the pre cum off of him. He groaned softly, eyes falling closed. He tossed an arm over his eyes, trying his hardest not to cum just from your lips touching his throbbing cock. 

You gave him a few more slow tugs before licking the underside of his length, humming against him. You finally decided to stop being a little tease and took him into your mouth, inching down slowly until your nose met the tuft, dark curls at the base of his cock. 

He was heavy in your mouth, throbbing at the feeling of your lips wrapped around him. He cradled the back of your head with his other hand, signaling for you to move. You slid your mouth up his shaft, hollowing your cheeks as you worked your way to the top. His silky flesh slid easily against the flat of your tongue, working its way up and down his length to create a steady rhythm. 

You moan around him as you taste the salt of him on your tongue. You move one hand to brace his thigh and the other to gently toy with his balls, knowing that’s what drove him crazy. 

Throaty moans were elicited from your husband, hand tightening on the back of your head in the slightest. 

“Fuck fuck fuck, yeah, just like that mama. Right there.” You whine against his cock when he calls you that, something purely primal licking a flame into your core and up your spine. 

“You like when I call you that?” Joel chuckles, uncovering his eyes with his arm. He looks down at you as desire has completely taken over your expression, zeroed in on one thing only: making your husband cum. 

You furrow your brows as you look up at him, and he moves his hand from the back of your head to cradle under your jaw. He lifted your mouth off of him slowly, drool spilling from your bottom lip as it was still connected to his swollen tip. 

“Answer me, darlin’.” He tilts his head at you, and you shyly nod. 

“Yes.” You’re breathless, moving your mouth back down to his cock before he stops you. 

“Wanna fill you up. Ride me, baby.”

Your thighs clench at his words, the flame in your core burning hotter each second that passes. 

You discard your panties and straddle him once more, the heat from the fire keeping your body a comfortable temperature. 

Joel’s hands slide up your body and up your spine, goosebumps forming onto your skin at his expert touch. He easily unclasps your bra and tosses it to the side, moving his hands to the front to grab the pillowy flesh. 

You slide his tip against your dripping cunt a couple of times before slowly sinking down onto him, the fullness setting your body aflame. 

You moan as you toss your head back, and the feeling of Joel rolling your sensitive nipples between his thumb and index fingers have you keening for release. 

You start to grind your hips back and forth, building sweet friction before you settle your hands on his chest to move up and down. Joel’s hands move down to the curve of your ass, giving it a playful smack as he admires you bouncing on him. 

“Fuck, Joel, feel so good.” You cry, eyes screwing shut at the burning pleasure becoming harder to ward off. 

“Takin’ such good care of me, mama. ‘M gettin’ close.” He says, hands moving to settle onto your hips. You whine in response, moving down so your body is flush with his as you give him another searing, passionate kiss. 

“You deserve to be taken care of too, Joel. So grateful for you, my honey.” Your lips are next to his ear now, whispering praises to him like it was the last thing you’d ever do on this earth. 

“Fuckin’ love you. Everythin’ about you.” Joel’s voice is strained now, a tell that he was about to come undone. One of Joel’s hands moves down to rub at your clit furiously, desperate to send you over the edge. 

“I love you too—oh, fuck.” You cry, the internal flame finally engulfing your body as a whole. Your orgasm triggered Joel’s as your tight cunt squeezed him, and he held your hips steady to release everything he had into you. Your body convulsed a few times before finally settling down, laying on top of Joel. He wrapped one arm around the small of your back as the other hand traced patterns on your warm skin, kissing your head a few times before a deep chuckle rumbles within his throat. 

You lift your head to look at him. “What?” Your voice is timid again, too fucked out to be any octaves louder than the crackling flames of the fire. 

“One of these days ‘m gonna fuck a baby into you, Mrs. Miller. Then I’ll get to call you mama for real.” 

You tucked your face into his neck at his words, laughing softly. You and Joel have talked about kids before, but both agreed you’d want to buy a house first with a possibility of owning a dog too before having any. 

You kissed Joel’s neck once more before hovering your face over his, smiling down at him. “Until then, Mr. Miller, we’ll need to start our own traditions… just us two for now. Starting with fucking by the fireplace more often.” You laugh, and Joel shakes his head with a hearty chuckle as he flips you over so you’re underneath him. 

“That I can do, darlin’,” Joel looks at you with a knowing smirk. “Round two?” 

tags: @ilovepedro ; @party-hearses ; @nostalxgic ; @tinygarbage ; @bastardmandennis

[thegnomelord]

A Little Bit Of Heaven

CW: NSFW, FTM subbot Gaz, domtop Male Reader, oral, scar kissing, soft fluffy sex, body worship, lingerie, fem language, reader is whipped for Gaz

PS: This is inspired by @ramvur 's art piece of Gaz, @el-chonkus you wanted to be tagged so here you go :D

The last few months have been Hell on both of you; mission after mission, drill after drill, chasing away exhaustion and sleep deprivation with copious amounts of caffeine in an attempt to put a dent in the stacks of paperwork you've been given. Despite spending most of your time together, be it training recruits or as battle buddies on missions, it feels like you and Kyle never have time for each other, the only time you two have to be intimate being when Kyle sleeps on your shoulder during the long plane rides.

So when Price tells you you two are cleared for a week of military leave, you jump at the chance to have a proper vacation. Once you get the tickets you put it in an envelope, going out to find Gaz.

You find him in your shared bunk room, peacefully snoring with a book splayed over his chest. Even in his sleep he's on edge, fingers twitching occasionally as if pulling the trigger of a gun. You're quiet as a mouse as you walk to his bed, kneeling to press a chaste kiss to his lips.

Kyle's eyelids flutter open, your familiar outline in his blurry vision calms him before military grade instincts can kick in, having to blink a few times to focus on you. "Mhm, what'ime isit?" He slurs as he sits up, the few minutes of sleep doing nothing to lessen the bags under his pretty brown eyes.

"Still early." You say, keeping your voice low. "I'm sorry for waking you,"

"Is fine," He waves away your apology, reaching out to wrap a loose arm around your neck, pulling you closer. "Did you need something?" Kyle's still groggy as he nuzzles your cheeks together, aiming for your lips but winding up kissing your nose.

"Yeah," You take a moment to relish the intimacy, not that Kyle minds, breathing in your scent with a happy sigh; God knows how long you'd spent in an intimacy deficit. "Guess what I did." You say with a humorous tone.

That sobers him up enough to lean back and give you a critical eye. "If you hid Price's cigars again I'm not hiding you." He warns, but there's obvious amusement in his voice.

"No, no," You snort, holding out the envelope for him. "It's something better."

"Do I even want to know?" Kyle raises an eyebrow but takes the envelope, opening it. Inside he finds two plane tickets to Greece, along with an invoice for a rented villa. "Are these. . .?" His voice dies down as he looks at you with wide eyes.

"You did say you wanted to go somewhere warm." You shrug a shoulder, trying not to show how much you hope he'll be pleased by this seeing as you two hadn't planned anything for your leave.

"Oh, mate," You can't describe the wide smile that graces his features, bright like the sun, one you'd happily let blind you. "Come here you-" He pulls you so close your foreheads bonk together, you can feel his grin as he kisses you. "-beautiful bastard." He sighs as your lips part but you don't, breathing in the same air.

"You're the beautiful one." Your comment has him giggling like a child; Kyle's laugh feels like silk on your ears, so infectious you find yourself giggling too. "Do you like them?"

"Do you even need to ask?" He teases, pulling you into another kiss.

. . .

Gaz is very smug on the day you're supposed to leave, cheeky as he gushes to Soap of all the things you two have got planned for your vacation, which of course has the Scot whining to Ghost about 'stepping up'. But it's all in good fun and you're sent off with a few demands to bring souvenirs.

Despite how tired you two are, the entire plane ride to Greece is spent learning about the local town near the villa you'd rented and all the tourist attractions there, learning a few sayings as well as how not to get scammed.

He's like a kid on Christmas when you finally get to the villa, exploring every room and the grounds around it; It's as pretty as it is old, spiderwebs of ivy and roses wrapping around the columns and sides of it, built on a cliff overlooking the ocean, but far bigger than what you two are used to, Kyle's animated assessment of every little detail in the frescos, evaporating the eeriness of the empty rooms.

And of course, the first thing you do when you get there is sleep a solid 24 hours, your exhaustion catching up to you two. You wake up the next day to Kyle still snoring next to you, much more relaxed and clutching you like a koala. He doesn't even stir when you get out of bed to make him and you a very late breakfast, receiving loving kisses on the cheek when Kyle finally stumbles out of dream land.

You spend your vacation doing all the typical couple things, thousands of photos filling Gaz's phone — you two dinning out or attempting to make some local dishes, several of you two donkey riding across the mountains (and one that he'd favored of a donkey trying to eat your clothes), silly photos of you two interacting with the statues in a nearby garde (you especially love the one of him imitating one), pictures of sunsets and sunrises and a dozen more of him coming out of the water, some selfies of Gaz with you haggling with a merchant in the background as well as your triumphant smirk as you hold a pearl necklace to Kyle's neck from behind.

Kyle likes to look at the photos when he wakes up before you, your body warm and pressed against his from behind while you sleep with your arms around him, his chest light as a feather from how intimate you two had been able to be, how lovely you'd been to him, a true gentleman and every bit the man he fell in love with.

And Kyle decides he wants to do something for you. And for him. A nice gift for the both of you.

He has to shove his pillow into your arms otherwise you wouldn't let go of him, a small giggle leaving his lips at how you nuzzle and hug the pillow like a koala. He tries to stay quiet as he goes to the dresser to pick up the small special suitcase he'd brought just for this vacation, picking out the clothes he'd wanted to wear just for you and him, but never got the time.

He watches himself in the mirror as he puts on the stockings, the material soft against his skin, the kitten heels fitting him perfectly. Kyle struggles with the bralette for a few minutes, but it's worth it when it frames his pecs in such a pleasing way, perking them up and hiding the top scars that run beneath them. Finally comes the long feathered robe, dragging behind him when he twirls in front of the mirror.

Kyle can feel giddy bubbling in his chest, heart beating just a bit faster. Back on base he would have felt ashamed at wearing something so frivolous and impractical, he was a soldier god damn it, but here, with you, he's just Kyle.

Gaz glances to your still sleeping form as he sits by the vanity to do his makeup, lipstick and mascara and a light blush, taking care of the small amount of facial he's managed to grow. He can't wait to see how you'll react when you see him like this. . .

A little mischievous smirk crosses his features and Gaz silently comes to your side of the bed, leaning down to kiss your face, leaving red lipstick marks all across your skin before leaving you to wake up to his surprise.

. . .

You wake from sunlight filtering through the curtains, the soft sound of Kyle humming rousing you from your dreams. You attempt to cuddle closer but soon enough figure out it's a pillow you're hugging. You grumble and sit up, your brain stuttering when you see yourself in the mirror. Bright lipstick marks dot a side of your face, from your forehead down all the way down to your jaw.

Kyle's work, no doubt, but you can't bring yourself to wipe his marks on you — a type of stigmata you'd happily wear. You don't bother with clothes, yawning as you follow the soft sound of his humming to the balcony.

You nearly swallow your tongue when you see him; wreathed in the soft morning light, his skin glowing like the golden bracelets on his arms, the pink roses blending in with his robe making him look like he's sitting on a cloud, soft feathers accentuating the robe like pearly sea foam he'd formed from. Your eyes roam from his red heels up the toned thighs, the sunlight softening the harsh scars decorating his stomach, the sheer material of the bralette both leaving nothing to the imagination and making you want to pull it off, his red lips like the red skin of an apple Eve had been tempted with.

If you were a Trojan prince, you wouldn't have looked at any goddess had Kyle been there, someone the sculptors of old times would have clamored to have as a muse.

If he told you he was a god, you'd take it as gospel, gift Kyle all your devotion just like the pearl necklace he's appraising.

"Holy hell." You mumble, scared to distract him, unwilling to pull him out of his own little world where his face isn't tense with unease and exhaustion, where his shoulders are relaxed and his instincts are blissfully sleeping, where he can just be.

But Kyle hears you, his warm brown eyes shifting to you, a bit of surprise flashing in his face before smiling. "I was wondering when you'd wake up." Kyle chuckled, a flush of heat spreading across his face at the way you look at him — eyes smoldering like coals with desire, a lovesick puppy just for him.

"You could have just woken me up if you were lonely." You hummed as you slowly approached him, brushing your fingers against his cheek. "You know I'd never say no to you."

"I know, I know." He huffs, pretty dark lashes fluttering as he pats your hand before pulling you into a kiss. You can taste wine on his lips, soft and plush against your own. He pulls back, holding up the pearls pearls. "Help me with these yeah?"

"Sure," You say, watching him shift so his back is facing you. You clip the pearl necklace around his neck easily, kissing the back of his neck just to feel him shiver. "There you go, handsome man."

"Trying to seduce me are you?" Gaz grins and quickly turns to you, pecking your forehead but pulling back when you attempt to kiss him.

"Can you blame me?" You nuzzle his neck, laying gentle kisses across his neck, your heart fluttering when he tilts his head back to give you more room. "You're absolutely gorgeous."

"Oh you," You can just about catch the way a blush darkens his face to a rich mahogany, his skin warming under your lips as you nibble on his collarbones. "charming bastard." He chuckles, holding the back of your neck as you go further down to trace the outline of his sternum with your lips.

"Just for you," Your hands rise up to cup his pecs over the bralette, lightly groping without attempting to take it off just yet. "Do you want to. . .?" You ask, rubbing your thumb over his pebbled nipple and god, if the soft silk pressing against his sensitive skin doesn't turn him on, nothing will.

"Fuck yes." Gaz whines so sweetly, holding your head close to his chest as you pull one nipple into your mouth, wetting the silk and making him shiver. You pull off to do the same to the other nipple, your hands roaming over his torse, tracing the harsh scars before going back up to push the bralette enough for you to be able to trace the top scars with your tongue. "Oh shit." He grunts as you kiss along the sensitive skin from one side of his chest to the other. "Love." He whines, embarrassed by his own eagerness, but if you don't touch him more he swears he's going to die.

You pull back and settle on your knees; Gods may be worshiped in blood and wine, but your devotion is all he needs. And you'll give it to him.

Your revenant fingers grope the muscle and fat of his thigh, slowly pulling down the pink stocking and following after it with your lips. Tracing the imprint the stocking had left at his mid thigh, pecking the bony part of his knee, kissing the small scars dotting his shin down to his ankle as you finally pull his heel and stocking off him.

Gaz swears he can feel his heart beating in his throat as he watches you repeat the process on his other leg, warmth lingering long after your lips have moved on. "Christ alive," He mumbles, the moment you peel off his remaining stocking he's spreading his legs for you, cheeks growing warm as your eyes settle on his cunt. A damp spot has grown on the feathered robe where his slick had trickled down, curly dark hair slick with his arousal, his dick starting to peek beneath it's hood. "Don't tease me now love." He whines out the last word, buzzing nerves threatening to force his thighs to close, but his need for you outweighs the embarrassment of exposing himself like this.

You're between his legs in a second, hiking his thighs on your shoulders and feeling the hard earned muscles tense around your ears. "Alright, alright." Is the last words you say before starting to really worship him, his hand brushing your hair as you press your face against his cunt.

Your tongue circling his hole and lapping up the slick dripping from it births a relieved and pleased sigh from Kyle's chest. The slow movement of your tongue exploring his pussy lips has his muscles relaxing, forcing him to recline on the bench, the railing of the balcony providing needed support as you slowly circle his hardening dick. You flatten your tongue to give his dick something to rub against, moving your tongue up and down as Kyle's hips twitch to meet your movements, lazily following after the pleasure.

You have no need to rush, listening to his pleased sighs and small little whimpers as you let him set the pace. Kyle can barely see you from how blurry his eyes are, soft sounds leaving his lips as you search out all his pleasure spots like you don't know where they are, like you're doing this for the first and last time; He has to bite his lip to give his thoughts something to latch on to lest his mind drown in the pleasure, embarrassment curling in the spaces of is belly not overtaken with heat at the thought of cumming so fast.

But you can feel how he comes closer and closer to an orgasm by the way his chest heaves, the way more slick continues to trickle from his cunt, staining your chin despite your best efforts to swallow his ichor down. His hand on the back of your hand keys you in to go faster, and without further ado you focus solely on his dick, swirling your tongue around it like it's a lollypop, dipping to lap beneath the hood.

His thighs tense like vices around your ears, threatening to crack your skull— what a wonderful death —is all your mind can think as oxygen slowly depletes, your sole objective to pleasure him. Distantly you can hear him chant your name, thighs shaking and hips twitching to grind his dick against your tongue.

Suddenly you wrap your lips around his length and suck.

His orgasm crashes over Kyle like a wave, pulling him down to drown in the depths of mind-numbing pleasure, sea foam popping in his belly as heat burns in his bones. You mouth opens to swallow all the slick gushing from his cunt and down your jaw, wet hair tickling your face as his shaking thighs clench around your head.

You don't pull away when Kyle's orgasm winds down and his thighs relax. "Sh-ah- shite!" Kyle moans when your tongue returns, feather light flicks against his pulsating walls collecting his slick like you've been in a desert for months. Your name falls from his lips, both a prayer and a curse, his thighs shaking as static dances across his nerves, his hand on his mouth trying to uselessly silence his moans as you lap up his arousal.

He finally manages to gather enough strength to pull your head back, both of you struck dumb by the other. You— by how ruined he looks, lines of mascara down his cheeks from where tears had laid a path, chest heaving and skin turned rich mahogany from ears to collarbones; Kyle — by how debauched you look, the lipstick marks he'd left earlier smudged all across your face, jaw and throat shining with his slick.

Fuck, he's aroused again.

He whimpers your name, tugging your head. "Need you." He whispers, eyes hooded.

In one smooth move you rise to your feet and pick him up, his legs and arms wrapping around you as he pulls you into a kiss, uncaring of his own taste on your tongue. You have just enough sense in your head to make your way to a laying couch close by, putting him down, your heart fluttering at how the feathered robe spreads out around him like a cloud.

"Hurry up," Kyle grumbles, a blush burning his cheeks even more as he splays his legs open for you, cunt clenching around nothing and dick hard as a rock, his arms still firmly wrapped around your neck to keep your mouths close.

You chuckle, the tip of your achingly hard cock kissing his cunt just as you do to his lips, "Breathe in and relax." You grip your dick in one hand to position yourself.

"'m not a bloody virgin." Kyle complains, his entire body so relaxed and pussy so slick that his cunt doesn't offer even a smidgeon of resistance as you push in, both of you groaning as your cock spreads his warm walls open.

"Let me treat you like one." You snort and distract any discomfort he might feel with a kiss, slowly sinking deeper and deeper until your balls rest against his ass, cock throbbing inside his clenching cunt. You stop, resting your forehead against his as you wait him to adjust.

Kyle breathes out a small grumble, "Only if you move." His leg wraps around your waist, heel digging into your back to force your hips to shift.

You grin and kiss him again, swallowing his moans when you pull back a bit and push your cock back in, his cunt greedily swallowing you back in and clenching around you like it doesn't want to let you go. But Kyle shifts his hips to meet your thrusts half way, his nails clawing scratches into your back when you start moving quicker.

"Oh, fuck- yes!- like that, just-" Kyle pants into your mouth, eyes hooded and unfocused, pleasure gnawing on his nerves as every deep thrust nails a pleasure spot inside him, the veins of your cock scrapping his sensitive walls, his slick wetting both of your pubes. He jumps the second you reach down to stroke his dick between two of your fingers, timing it to stroke down every time you bottom out inside him, the air around you filled with the scent of sex and Kyle's sweet moans and chants of your name.

"Fuck, I'm close." You warn as you increase your pace, your entire body buzzing with pleasure. "Do you want it inside?" You ask, biting your lips and trying to stave off your orgasm.

"Shite- yes, yes, yes-" Kyle throws his back as his orgasm sneaks up on him for the second time, slick warm walls clamping down on your flesh like vices as he cums. You follow suit soon after, bottoming out as you cum inside him.

You're both breathless and sweaty as you shift him around so you're not crushing him when you lay down, your head resting on his chest. Your eyes close as you listen to his breathing, and you swear you could fall asleep if his hands didn't brush your hair, scratching the back of your neck until you force your eyes open.

His smiling face greets you, soft and warm like the sun, "Thank you love." He grins, tugging you into a quick and soft kiss.

"Thank you." You hum, making him laugh a little. You lay there just enjoying the sound of the sea and the chirping birds for a bit. Then you feel him shift, grinding his hips back onto your soft cock still inside him. "Kyle?" You ask, your cock hardening slowly despite the pain of overstimulation.

"Think you can go again?" There's an impish smirk on his handsome face as he grinds his hips again, every bit a demanding god as he pulls you back into a hungry kiss, all tongue and teeth.

And you wouldn't dare refuse him. . .

[steddieasitgoes]

@steddiemas Day 3 Prompt: Needing To Be Quiet

This is the filthiest thing I've written, please don't look at me 😅

Tags: Established Relationship, Future Fic, Christmas Morning Sex

wc: 2031 | Rating: E

Read on ao3 | ao3 collection

Steve is in that blissful half-awake, half-asleep state. 

He’s warm. Snug in bed with the covers pulled up and Eddie’s sleeping body curled into him the way it always is when Steve wakes up in the morning. His eyelids are heavy and sleep-ridden, peacefully held shut despite the ray of sunshine sneaking in through the crack in the drapes. He can hear Eddie snoring beside him and Scooby’s pitter-patting paws as he paces the hallway. 

It’s nice. 

Peaceful. 

The perfect early Christmas morning. 

Sleep has almost pulled Steve back in, when Eddie lets out a quiet whimper behind him. His arms tighten around Steve’s bare waist, pulling him closer. His nose drags against the base of Steve’s neck, ticking the wisps of hairs there. It’d be cute if Eddie’s dick wasn’t also poking his ass. 

Steve tries to shift away, but there’s no use. Eddie’s grip is too strong as he holds him in his arms, rutting his hips against Steve’s boxers. Another whimper of a moan falls from Eddie’s lips, hot air fanning across Steve’s neck. 

Christ. 

“Eds,” Steve whispers, turning his head over his shoulder to sneak a peek. 

He half expects to find Eddie awake, mirth in his eyes and a smirk on his face. It wouldn’t be the first time Eddie’s woken Steve up like this. Unfortunately, that’s not the case. Eddie’s eyes are screwed shut, a wrinkle forming between his brows as his lips part letting out another hushed huff of pleasure and frustration. 

“Eds,” Steve says again, gently nudging him with his shoulder. “Eddie, baby, wake up.” 

A chorus of groans and incoherent mumbling follows before Eddie’s eyes slowly blink open. “Wha’s wrong?” he asks, voice horse and slow. Drunk of sleep and whatever he was dreaming about, if Steve had to guess. 

“Good dream?” 

It takes a moment for the dream to come back to Eddie, but Steve knows the moment it has. His cheeks turn a beautiful pale pink, lips parting just as they had in his sleep. 

Eddie hums, closing his eyes for a second as if he’s replaying it all. When he opens them again, they’re full of that mirth Steve was expecting earlier. “Was unwrapping my Christmas present.” 

It’s hard to talk with his back still to him, but Eddie’s grip hasn’t wained so Steve makes do. He’s going to have a kink in his neck for sure, but it’s nothing a couple of Aspirin and an apologetic massage from his husband can’t solve later. 

“Oh, yeah? What was it?” 

Humming again, one of Eddie’s hands loosens its grip on Steve’s torso. Fingers dance their way down following the trail of hair before slipping into the waistband of Steve’s boxers. Steve hisses as Eddie’s cold hands wrap around his dick, giving it a teasing squeeze. 

“Eddie,” he groans. It’s louder than he anticipated. Too loud for his liking on this particular morning. With wide eyes, he whips his head to the small baby monitor on his nightstand. The picture is grainy but he can make out two lumps still in their toddler beds. Relief washes over him for all of a two seconds before Eddie gives him another experimental squeeze that has Steve gasping into his pillow. 

“Christ,” he groans. “Eds we can’t.”

“Why not?” Eddie whines, hand stilling but not leaving Steve’s boxers. “S’Christmas and I want my present.” 

Steve’s brain tells him this is a bad idea, but the blood rushing to his dick seems to disagree. He can feel it twitch in Eddie’s embrace. Doesn’t have to turn his head to know that Eddie is smirking behind him — already cock-drunk even though he’s barely got his hands on him. 

“Think you want your Christmas present too,” Eddie whispers, lips pressed to the shell of Steve’s ear. 

“We… can’t,” Steve pants, scrunching his eyes as he tries to will the blood to go anywhere else. “Told the kids they can’t get out of bed unless they hear we’re up.” 

Eddie hums as he repositions himself behind Steve. One hand still buried in Steve’s boxers, the other holds his weight as he glances at the nightstand where the baby monitor is. “Looks like they’re still sleeping,” he says, lowering himself back down onto the bed behind Steve. “‘sides they won’t know what we’re up to. If they hear anything they’ll just think it’s Scooby.” 

Steve scoffs, jerking away from Eddie. “Are you implying I sound like the dog when I moan?” 

With one swift yank, Steve’s back against Eddie’s front, his hand back to its painful teasing. Eddie’s laugh is bright and warm against the nape of Steve’s neck. It’s hard to be irritated with him when he’s like this. And Eddie knows it. 

“I don’t know, sweetheart. But we can’t find out right now. Gotta be quiet for me, yeah?” 

This time Steve successfully muffles his whine with the pillowcase as Eddie slowly drags his clammy hand up and down. It’s the slightest bit uncomfortable, too dry for Steve’s liking. The beauty of being with Eddie for this long is that he doesn’t have to tell him this. He already knows. 

Eddie stops his dry pumping and focuses his attention of the tip of his cock again. Giving it all the attention until it’s leaking with pre-cum. Eddie wastes no time using it as a lube as he drags his hand back down until his fingers tangle in the hair at Steve’s base. 

Teasing really isn’t their thing anymore. It’s hard to take your time when you’ve got two kids under five to take care of. Their sex life going back to what it was when they first started dating — fast and sloppy blowjobs in locked bathrooms, quick, quiet, fucks before bed, aching and rough but enough to scratch the itch. 

Steve can’t remember the last time they did this. Maybe their anniversary months ago when they shipped the kids off to Robin’s place. But even that was different. More heat and passion. Premeditated. This? This is the spontaneous sex he’s always craved and loved. 

Eddie’s still slowly stroking him, taking his sweet ass time. It’s only when Steve feels Eddie’s cock rut against his ass, does he realize he’s not really doing anything here. He can’t be the only one to get off on Christmas morning. That wouldn’t be fair. 

Blindly, Steve reaches one of his hands back feeling around for the hem of Eddie’s pants. He’s usually an expert at this kind of thing, but something is wrong. He lets out a frustrated groan as his hand is met with warm flannel after warm flannel — no elastic in sight. 

“What the fuck are you wearing?” Steve growls at the ceiling, still unable to turn around to face him. 

“Our matching onesies,” Eddie says, own voice strained by the pressure no doubt building in his gut. 

Steve would be turned on by Eddie’s ability to get off just by touching him if he wasn’t so desperate to get his hands on him. “You slept in that thing?” 

“‘Course I did. Marley wanted matching family pajamas, I have to give our girl what she wants.” 

“Please don’t talk about our daughter when your hand is stroking my dick like that,” Steve scolds. Well, tries to scold. It comes out more like a choke sob, but Eddie doesn’t fault him for that. It takes a moment for him to regain his composure before his hand is feeling around in the dark again. The search for the zipper of the stupid onesie feels impossible. He’s pretty sure Eddie’s managed to hide the damn thing or something when finally his fingers are met with the warm metal. Wasting no time, Steve yanks it down and slips his hands inside. 

“You slept in this thing without underwear?” Steve grunts. 

“Didn’t want to suffocate in more layers.” 

“You’re ridiculous,” Steve laughs, before giving Eddie’s dick a similar, teasing squeeze. 

Eddie’s hiss is music to Steve’s ears. Way better than the noises he was making while he was asleep. 

“Thought you said,” Eddie pants, his own hand stilling around Steve. “We can’t do this now.” 

“Like you said,” Steve says, squeezing again. “We can, s’long as you’re quite. Can you do that for me, baby?” 

“Mhmm, yep, I can be so quite. You won’t even hear me. Oh, fuck!” 

Steve chuckles, teasing Eddie’s slit one more time before he pulls his hand away. With Eddie momentarily distracted, he wiggles out from his grasp and turns on his side. It’s the first time he’s gotten to really look at Eddie all morning. He’s beautiful. Pupils dilated, lips red from where he’s been worrying it between his teeth. A sheen of sweat cling to his forehead, making his bangs stick to it. Steve’s never been more in love. 

“Good morning,” he whispers, connecting their lips in a tenderhearted kiss that doesn’t match all the teasing they’ve been doing. 

Eddie chases the kiss, mumbling his own greeting into Steve’s mouth. Steve lets himself get loss in it. Eddie’s chapped lips against his own, their gross morning breath not even a concern as he licks into his waiting mouth. He’s so caught up in the kissing, he doesn’t realize Eddie’s hands are moving again until he’s got Steve’s cock and his own wrapped around his hand. 

“Ah,” Steve gasps, pulling away from Eddie’s lip. He lets his gaze fall to the place between them. The place where Eddie’s skillful hand is wrapped around both of them, slowly pumping them together. 

“I know, sweetheart. Me too,” Eddie breathes, already struggling to keep up his pace. 

Realizing he’s struggling, Steve lends his own hand to the mess. Groaning in pleasure when his own hand wraps around them both. He manages to interlock his fingers with Eddie’s, whose hand hasn’t left their cocks. Connected, Steve starts moving both their hands up and down at a slow steady pace. 

It takes a moment for his wrist to adjust to the angle, but when it does, there’s no slowing down. Especially not when Eddie starts controlling his own hand again. The two of them work each other up, together. Hands interlocked, cocks rutting against each other. Moans and pants and swears tumble into the once-quiet room. 

Steve’s not sure who comes first — or if they really do finish at the same time. All he knows is their chests are painted in a mixture of their cum. Thankfully, Eddie’s onesie has gone unscathed. 

“Holy fucking shit,” Eddie pants, finally pulling his hand away from Steve’s softening cock. 

“Yeah,” Steve breaths, still coming down from his high. “That was…”

“Santa really delivered this year, sweetheart,” Eddie teases, nuzzling into the crook of Steve’s neck. 

“Shut up,” Steve laughs. 

There laughter fills the room before it’s interrupted by a loud clatter, followed by two pairs of eager footsteps patting down the hallway. 

“Daddys!” Marley shouts. “’S Christmas! Get up! Santa came!” 

When Steve meets Eddie’s eyes, he can see the mischief brewing behind his eyes. “Don’t even think about it,” Steve warns. 

Eddie shoots his hands up in surrender, ducking his head as he chuckles softly to himself. 

“Yeah, it is Marley!” Steve shouts back. As he sits up, Steve remembers the mess they’ve made. Cum slowly sliding down his chest. Shit. He looks at Eddie who meets his frantic gaze with a calm one. 

“Hey, Marls?” Eddie calls. She responds instantly, excitement of Christmas morning evident in her bright, cheery voice. “Santa left Daddy’s a note saying he left you and your brother lots of special things under the tree, but you have to wait in your room until we come to get you guys. Can you go back and wait for us?” 

They can hear Marley whine, the familiar sound of her stomping her feet. “Fine,” she sighs with all the dramatics of a Munson. “But you better hurry!” 

“Come on,” Steve says, rising to his feet. “We’ve got ten minutes before she’s back and breaking down the door.” 

“Ten minutes?” Eddie asks, wiggling his eyebrows. “Sounds like enough time for a round two.” 

“You’re ridiculous.” 

“But it’s Christmas,” Eddie whines, following Steve into their bathroom. “And you’re the best gift I’ve ever gotten.” 

[moodymelanist]

I Guess It's Half Timing (And The Other Half's Luck) — Epilogue

I can’t believe this story has finally come to a close!! Thank you so much to everyone who followed along with me on this fic, I had so much fun writing it and trying my hand at slow burn for the first time 🩷

Also, a very big and special shoutout to the GC for motivating me every month to write this and helping me come up with fun little ideas to sneak in. Y’all kept me going and I couldn’t have done it without you!!

I hope this ties up everything nicely!!! until next time and happy 2024 everyone :’)

✷✷✷✷✷

Cassian

Cassian had been enjoying his dream when he was abruptly yanked into consciousness by the sound of his daughter screaming her head off in excitement.

“Mommy! Daddy!” Sera yelled at the top of her lungs, her little feet just narrowly missing crushing Cassian’s hand as she jumped up and down on the bed. How she’d managed to even climb up without shaking him awake was beyond him, but she’d certainly accomplished her goal now. “Wake up! It’s Christmas!”

“Jesus Christ, what time is it,” Nesta muttered under her breath. She looked adorably grumpy as always, and Cassian fought the urge to tug where her hair pulled into two loose braids for sleep like he was the little kid here. “Okay, okay, Sera. We’re up, I promise, just give us a second.”

“Too goddamn early,” Cassian mumbled right back. He was usually an early riser, but he’d been pulling a lot of long nights leading up to the actual holiday. Sue him for wanting to sleep in a little later than six thirty in the morning. “Sera, mijita, calm down a little, okay?”

Sera had just turned four last month, so they were much more concerned about making an effort for the holidays these days now that the chances of her remembering it were so much higher. She’d been talking about Santa and wondering aloud about her presents for weeks now, and if Cassian hadn’t been so worried about making the day good for her, he would’ve been able to focus on just how adorable she was.

Keep reading on AO3 here!

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[batmanisagatewaydrug]

okay whatever!! I'm doing NaNoWriMo I guess!!!

I'm fully expecting to fall off the wagon at some point, probably this coming weekend because I'll be at a conference, but idk I like having structured writing motivations. and it's a YA thing with a VERY informal conversational voice so hopefully I can just chill and have fun.

first 1800ish words here. meet Cara, she's 18 and a werewolf and not doing so hot.

Where do I even start?

That’s not a rhetorical question, I have no idea. I’ve never really done this before, you know? I’ve never actually had to explain myself to anybody. Growing up, everyone always knew exactly who I was and what was going on.

Well, not everything. I mean, a lot of people actually had no idea what was going on with me for a really long time. That was actually part of the problem.

So suppose I start with the day that everything started falling apart? It makes as much sense as anything else.

That was the day we were supposed to be getting back to school from winter break. I remember really clearly that I slept in so late that Dad had to come and tell me it was time to get out of bed, which I he hadn’t had to do since I was a little kid and still adjusting to the routine. Every morning since I was thirteen, we get up early together to make breakfast and go patrol around the town. 

Sorry, do you know about… I mean, you obviously know what I am. That’s not what I’m talking about. But how much do you actually know about the werewolf thing? Most people don’t really know much unless they grow up in a town with a local wolf around. It’s a lot simpler than most people think it is but it’s also a lot more complicated, in other ways.

I don’t even know if I’m making sense. You remember what I said, about not being used to having to explain myself very much? 

Okay. Um. Just let me know if you have a question, I guess. Basically, what happened that morning is that Dad came and told me I had to crawl out of bed and I scrambled up and got dressed in the warmest, baggiest clothes I could find, and then we had some oatmeal together, and then we both went out back on the porch and turned into giant wolves so that we could run around the town borders and make sure nothing spooky was afoot. Got that?

Cool.

Like I said, we’d been doing that a long time. Every morning since seventh grade started, when I finally started getting a handle on my wolf stuff. And I was a real pro about it, even though I love being in bed, so I guess Dad probably thought it was weird that he had to tell me to get up. It wasn’t like I had been sleeping in over Christmas vacation; we never get a break just because of holidays. I mean, monsters don’t care that it’s Chrisitmas. Heck, the year before that we had to deal with a bunch of snowmen that came to life and started attacking people up at the ski lodge.

Did you hear about that? We did kind of blow up the lodge, but it was an accident. And it worked, so… You know.

Sorry. Am I avoiding the subject? I don’t know, I don’t think so. We haven’t even gotten to the hard stuff yet.

Me and Dad. He made oatmeal with strawberries and cream for breakfast, it was great. And then we went out to circle around Silver Falls and make sure everything was normal, which it wasn’t, but we didn’t know it yet that morning. Normally we can smell it coming miles away, right? I sort of mean that literally, because the sense of smell when you’re a wolf is like… I can’t describe it. I’ve never known how, when I’m human. It’s like having an extra eye open up seeing stuff you can only kind of squint at normally, and everything that’s usually fuzzy or invisible is suddenly so obvious. And then you change back and it’s just gone, like trying to hang onto a dream after you wake up. And our hearing is great too, which also helps. It’s hard to surprise us.

But there’s also just, like, a sense. Like a feeling, like when the town is in trouble we can feel it as clearly as if there’s something creeping up right behind us and breathing down our necks. My friend Ruby says that normal people learn not to pay attention to it when they have a feeling that something’s following them or they can’t stop glancing over their shoulders, because in normal people that’s just anxiety or paranoia. You take pills for it and go to therapy because it’s bad for you to feel like something is out to get you all the time, so you make it stop. But Dad always taught me and my brothers to listen to those instincts, because when werewolves feel like they’re in danger they’re usually right.

That morning everything was normal, though. All of the tracks in the snow were normal animals, ones that we knew. And no strange scents in the air. It was just a nice run with my dad, a good way to start the day off.

Most days actually are quiet, you know. For every day we’re tearing around town trying to catch a monster before it can kill someone, there are dozens of mornings that we just get to go for a run and stretch our legs. We can’t talk when we’re wolves but it’s still nice, hanging out. Sometimes Dad will stop to point out something cool he doesn’t want me to miss, like some baby animals or a pretty sunrise or flowers growing when it’s warm. I always get what he means. And I appreciate that he does it. We go fast when we’re wolves, like, faster than anything else can run. So it’s easy to miss things. And he always says it’s important to actually pay attention to the land and everything living on it, so that we remember why we do this and what we’re protecting. Because if you lose sight of why you do it, then you get… I don’t know. Weird?

I definitely ended up getting weird.

But we made it back to the house with no incidents, which was great. We were definitely thinking it was about time for something to happen soon, though. We never go more than a few months at a time without something cropping up in Silver Falls. The last big thing had been some gremlins at the trade school, gathering up scraps to build a mech suit. That one was… it was fun, honestly. I had never fought anything like that. And Hector thought it was really cool, because he likes robots and stuff like that. It was actually kind of downhill after that? I mean, not really, but we had kind of been getting worse since then. Like the gremlins were the last time we had something in common.

Hector was sort of my boyfriend, by the way. Or my fiancé, sort of. I don’t know, I hate that word. We weren’t even technically engaged, I guess. He had never actually proposed, but everyone knew what would happen after we graduated.

Do we have to talk about this part right now? I’m going to get to it, I swear, but there was other stuff. I swear I’m not avoiding it.

I was avoiding Hector, though. Not on purpose, it had just kind of happened over break. I don’t know, we’d been hanging out less and less, and then over break it was just so easy not to see him at all. He’d gone back to Florida with his mom for Christmas, to visit their family there, and I didn’t want to bother him. Or think about him at all, really. He’s a nice guy, really, but it was…

No, hang on. I’m doing this so out of order. We’ll get back to Hector, I swear.

Okay. Okay. So I got back home from this patrol where nothing happened, and we were running a little behind because I’d taken so long getting up, so Mom and the boys were practically already out the door. Um, I’ve got three brothers. Colin, Caleb, and Cooper. My parents liked the double C name so much for me that they just kept on rolling with it. 

The boys are all normal. Only the firstborn in each generation gets the wolf gene, and it only bounces if something happens. Like, my dad actually wasn’t supposed to be a wolf, but his brother died when he was a teenager fighting some tree monsters with my grandma. It only shifted to Dad after that, on the next full moon after his brother was gone. So Colin would only be a wolf if I died too young to have a successor, which is… I don’t know. I won’t let it happen. Colin doesn’t need to worry about that. 

It’s weird, actually. Colin was fourteen when all of this happened, and Caleb was twelve, which was how old I was when I started wolfing. And when I was twelve I felt so mature and ready to start taking all of those responsibilities on with my dad. I was so impatient for it, and I hated that it felt like I took so long. Like, I was kind of a late bloomer. But I think back to Caleb being that age, and even Colin being fourteen, and I don’t know. They’re babies. They’ve always seemed like babies to me. But I would look at my brothers and their friends and how young they were, and how totally clueless, and it just seemed crazy to me that I was already running off to life or death fights at all hours when I was their age. 

Sorry, I got sidetracked. Anyways.

So Mom was already dressed for work at school, and had the boys wrangling all of their books and lunches together and stuff, and she told me if I wanted a ride with her then I needed to move fast, so I told her not to worry about it. And she said:

“If you see Ruby before I do, give her a hug and tell her congratulations for me.”

And I didn’t know what she meant, which was weird, because Ruby was always doing something that deserved a hug and congratulations, but I also always knew what it was because Ruby was my best friend and I thought I knew about everything going on with her. But I was confused and Mom could tell, so she went:

“She got another three acceptance letters over break.”

And I said, oh, right, yeah, like I had known all about that, so Mom dropped it and gave me and Dad little kisses goodbye and left. Which was kind of silly in my case, I guess, since she worked at my school and my school wasn’t huge, so we would definitely see each other again before too long. But it was sweet, though. I don’t want to sound like I was complaining about my mom loving me or anything.

[devskindawritingblog]

Dating Jackie Taylor Christmas HC’s (1996)

( I forgot to do the Christmas colours on Shauna’s and I’m to lazy to go back )

This girl loves Christmas 

It's her favourite holiday of all time

It's literally 11:59 pm on Halloween, and she starts talking about how it's almost Christmas

Wakes you up every morning for the weeks before Christmas and tells you how many days there are until Christmas

Blasts Christmas music all the time

You have to physically restrain her when you pass by a Christmas section at a store because she is going to want to buy anything she sees

I feel like as a kid, her Christmases were also pretty good

I mean, we saw her house in the pilot, and it looked pretty big

It's fair to say her parents have some money

So as a kid, she probably also got what she wanted and still does

She wants to do  every single Christmas thing with you

Ice skating, making cookies, snow angels, hot chocolate, watching Christmas movies

Jackie loves the idea of snow and look 

She likes the “ snow aesthetic”

But she doesn't like snow in general

If she survived long enough in the wilderness to actually get to winter, she would be whiney and refuse to get water or do anything

That girl is not shovelling snow or being outside in the snow for more than 10 minutes

She makes excuses for not being able to do it

“It’s too heavy” 

“It’s too cold”

“My arm hurts today; I can’t”

She sits outside at the front window, watching you shovel, with a warm drink in her hand, wearing your sweater

On that note, she also steals all your clothes as it gets colder

You wake up one morning and go to grab a sweater, and you have none

Because they are all in her room, somewhere

She is the coldest person on the planet

She is cold all year round, but in winter she transforms into an ice cube

She has multiple fuzzy blankets, and she is clinging to you 

She has freezing hands and shoves them under your shirt to warm them up

She wants to have a Christmas party where she invites the whole team

She decorates her house all nice and festive

And ends up putting up mistletoe in her doorway and then pretends she didn't when you walk in 

“Oh look! It's mistletoe, I guess we gotta kiss 😏”

“Jackie, it's literally your house”

She's the type of person to subtly drop hints about what she wants for Christmas

In a way that's not even a little bit subtle

Wakes you up early on Christmas to go open presents

Wears some form of red dress with some fluffy white accents

Gets everyone Santa hats

She is quite good at wrapping gifts

She likes to make them look all nice with a few ribbons and a bow

Paints her nails red, green, and white

And if she is able to convince you to get matching nails, she will paint yours too

She would also be into matching outfits

She pouts until you finally give in to her

I feel she wouldn't wear like an ugly Christmas sweater but just something with Christmas colours 

[chimerafflesia]

Yuri Duel Links 2024

(this is literally just a masterpost of everything that made me insane over the course of the event so I can reflect and laugh/cry/etc)

first of all the sentence "Yuri Duel Links Event 2024" would have put me in a coma if you told me that say like. a month and a half ago. when Lulu and Rin came in September I was SURE it was going to be at least early 2025 before we got him. and Yet,

I was in the middle of getting ready for a concert when I got a notification from the DL subreddit of all things that said "He's Finally In" and I saw a little picture of Yuri and I was like Lol. Yeah Ok. so then I opened duel links and checked and was hit with This:

and I was like Okay. okay. cool cool cool cool. I'm gonna be so normal about this. *narrator voice* "via the tags on this post, you could see they were indeed not normal about it"

and girl sorry I wasn't gonna be normal about it like I've wanted this cunt in duel links since he landed on my radar. I knew from the first episode he appeared in that he was going to be my favorite arc-v character because I tend to have a Type when it comes to characters. it's been the same since I was like 8. sue me.

I even started getting into theory territory I was SERIOUS

(this ended up not being the case but congrats to Dumon for being the July unlock that was a lot of fun)

HOWEVER SPEAKING OF PREDICTING UNLOCKS I DO HAVE TO SAY I made this list back in MAY predicting the rest of the characters for 2024, and while some of these are very out there and Not Happening (sorry Marik and Atticus) I DID ORIGINALLY PREDICT YURI FOR AN OCTOBER UNLOCK. (Dumon for July as well) I AM LITERALLY JOHN KONAMI I GUESS.

so time goes by and I have a month to grind gems for Yuri's box because OBVIOUSLY I need a full character deck for him. would tumblr user chimerafflesia do anything less. I achieved this btw. 9999 gems the day before the event started. I was READY.

October 23rd. I literally wake up at 6am because I was so excited I was like a kid on christmas. I am hit with these screens and actually got kinda misty eyed because it was Happening

I waited 5000 years (about 7 months) to see that "Event Exclusive" in front of him and it was real and happening like CHEERS I'LL DRINK TO THAT!

I recapped a lot of my initial reactions on day one here and here but it just doesn't do it justice like I was just so excited and happy and having the time of my life playing this little freemium mobile game. I've said it like 348735 times now but duel links is genuinely so fucking amazing to me I love this game so so so much.

AND THIS EVENT WAS SO WONDERFUL!!!! THEY DID RIGHT BY HIM I WAS (AND STILL AM) SO HAPPY. HIS CHARACTERIZATION STAYED INTACT. WE GOT SOME NEW LITTLE FLAVOR DETAILS FOR HIM. THAT MAY HAVE TO BE A SEPARATE POST BUT GOD. YURI FANS WE ARE EATING GOOD.

here are some personal favorites. little problem child 🩷💜

and course this instant classic:

but there are so many. I point to this video which has all his dialouge including taunts.

look at these screenshots man like come on. I can't believe these are real. they look like images that would've been posted on reddit like 3 years ago with the caption "This Will Be Duel Links in 2024" EXCEPT IT IS.

I set up this board with all the predap extra deck mons + starving venom and was staring at it like Man We Really Won. this shit's beautiful

Just. man I feel like there's so much more I wanna say but overall it was just a really fun event. this might sound silly to some people but I really do have a special connection to yugioh in general and I do feel like it was fate when it came into my life. I really got into yugioh in April 2021 during a particurally dark time in my life and yugioh became like a lifeline for me. it was an escape. it still is. I'm always going to be grateful for this franchise.

I watched arc-v from March-April of this year (immediately after finishing zexal btw, which is the first time ever I watched two yugioh anime back to back) and to say it fried my brain is kind of an understatement like I still think about this show every day of my life. to quote my own tweet:

like. YEAH.

Yuri in particular is a fusion parasite all on his own he wormed himself into my brain and hasn't let go. I've rewatched his episodes so many times but I think I've seen arc-v episode 135 in particular roughly 124 times. could be more. it will be more.

I can't help but feel like watching arc-v this year was meant to be. (first of all, the same year I watch it FOUR arc-v characters get into duel links? divine timing if I've ever seen it) but in particular the timing of the Yuri event feels very nice. I've been dealing with some personal woes (particulary surrounding employment, amongst other things) and again this event was such an escape for me, even if just for a few hours each day. I can't wait until he's back in a few months. we will be there :)

I'm at the point where I don't really care if it's "cringe" to get this emo about shows/characters/games etc cuz at the end of the day this shit really does mean something to me man. I know what yugioh has done for me and what it'll definitely continue to do for me and I'm grateful for it <3

(PS it is really really fun to wreck people on ranked with super poly) here is a live image of me playing online duel links

[goodnitedrdead]

I definitely think those type of situations work for Carrillo -- they'd be really cute actually. I love the idea of him making dinner and it burning LOL

Well hello, Christmas anony!

The situation I had in mind was something entirely different from dinner, something a bit more... idk sensual I guess but in the end turns out wrong. Im still working on that so it will definitely be a treat for later 😏

BUT WHILE WE'RE HERE... why don't we use this moment to dive into some hcs? *rubs hands eagerly*

So, it's Christmas Eve and you both had been given the day off, fortunately.

it starts off just as he would've wanted, getting to sleep in for the first time in for fucking ever.

(didn't even get to "sleep in" he was just pleased he didn't have to listen to his damn alarm)

this man is used to waking up at the crack of dawn ever since he was in the military and you know what they say, old habits die hard.

not that he didn't wake up at the crack of dawn this time, but you insisted he stay a little longer in bed because.. "it's Christmas Eve, Horacio. what the fuck else are you gonna do today other than take it easy?"

he decided to listen to you since he knows how you get when sleep gets interrupted for you, so he decided to lay back down.

at this you decided to completely wrap yourself around him to prevent this very very stubborn man to not get up

im talking like tangled legs, half of your body on top of his, face nuzzled into the crook of his neck, hands buried in his hair, absolutely no fucking way of getting out of this one.

he'd keep dozing in and out of sleep, absolutely enamored by you and all he kept thinking while he was in and out of consciousness was just how happy you made him the short time the two of you have been together

eventually when you did get up, and both got ready for the day, you decided to start cooking to have a nice lil dinner with him to celebrate.

Christmas Day was going to be spent with his family, so as of now the both of you didn't have to worry about that. It was the best idea because that way the kids (his nieces and nephews and his own kids) wouldn't attempt their own extraction mission to open their presents on the 24th.

he convinced you to relax and let him take care of the cooking, which you were a bit like ??? because you've never seen this man cook in the time you've been with him.

not saying he doesn't know how, but lets be honest, he's a man of tradition and he's kinda used to letting the women handle it.

HE DOESN'T FORCE IT THOUGH

but he felt it was the least he could do today for you to just let you know how much he loved and appreciated you being in his life

but oh boy, if that's how he shows his love then... 💀

it was early in the afternoon when he convinced you to go out and do some last minute shopping

you were like ok... there's nothing else to shop for--

"come on, mi vida. we're out of milk"

there was literally milk in the fridge but you were like ok and went out to see what you could find

you did some window shopping since you literally had every.damn.thing. at home already

when the hell were you supposed to go back???? he never mentioned a time or?? anything???

whatever, you decided to head back home after like an hour

when you got home you noticed he had his windows open?????

you literally almost knocked down the door because your keys kept falling out of your hands

when you managed to get it open and you rushed inside you almost fucking asphyxiated on the smell and the smoke inside

"Horacio? What the hell happened?" you kept shouting and trying to look for him

when you turned around to go look upstairs you collided with a goddamn mountain

he held you still so you wouldn't fall back and he looked almost terrified

"you're back?"

"Well what else was I supposed to do? What the fuck happened?"

it was almost cute how SCARED he look

the man was absolutely mortified that you'd found him and his own house in this state

he kept stumbling over his words and stammering as he was trying to explain to you how he almost burned down the house because he didn't know how long he was supposed to leave the food in the oven for????

"are you serious?" was all you could ask him. You honestly didn't even have it in you to question him

the look on his face was GOLDEN. if anyone at the office were to see him like this... ohhh boy they'd never let this go

the fearsome Colonel Horacio Carrillo... standing in front of you trying to explain himself and looking like he was about to burst into tears

all you could do was try to hold back your laughter... and just hug him

"let's clean up and find something else to make"

he just nodded and sighed, now he kept trying to apologize to you for what happened

"Horacio, it's fine. Just please, don't ever go near the kitchen again," was all you told him and placed a kiss on the tip of his nose

a smile adorning your face and he nearly forgot what happened at the sight of you smiling at him

he honestly doesn't know what he'd do without you

[okkalo]

Hello hello!!! Congratulations on 1k💖💖💖💖💖

If the event is still running can i please request a match up with a tokyorev guy?

I am a virgo, and as far as mbti goes i oscillate between all the INxx types. Mostly INTJ/INFJ currently though. I 'd say i am smart. I am VERY shy when you first meet me, but i am a lot more social when you get to know me. I think i appear intimidating, but i am kind and gentle. I am also a little bit of a pessimist sometimes and i got anxiety and depression.

I am 163cm tall, a bit on the heavier side with wider hips and a little bit of tummy, brown medium length curly-ish hair and brown eyes and higher cheekbones.

I don't think i have a type? Just someone who will be a decent human being, and loves all of me for who i am and treats me kindly and gently.

I like painting, drawing, writing, walking, and used to love learning (still do deep down) but i am recovering from complete burnout. Favourite holiday is christmas, and i absolutely LOVE cats.

Thank you in advance and congrats again on your milestone🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

hi jane! thank you for the request and your congratulations 🫶 i gave you two boys since i know some people get weirded out by the older black dragons gen because they’re much older than the rest,, but shinichiro is mostly who i thought of when reading your matchup :) i hope you enjoy your matchups 🫶

𝗶 𝗻𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗮 𝗰𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗲 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗯𝗲 𝗮 𝗳𝗮𝗻 𝗼𝗳 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗲 ₊˙♡﹗

𝗸𝗮𝗹𝗼 𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗲𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 : shinichiro / chifuyu from tokyo rev

“hey, wake up,” your boyfriend’s voice whispered out, his hand nudging your arm. it was a not-so-kind awakening, especially with how his hand shaking your arm only seemed to escalate. “hey—!”

the opening of your eyes immediately silenced him. a sheepish smile spread across his lips as he tried to make up for waking you up by pressing light kisses to your cheeks. “good morning,” he tried to lovingly whisper.

a small yawn that escaped your lips only made him feel guiltier. he couldn’t help himself and drew his arms around you, pulling you close to his chest. perhaps you both didn’t need to wake up right now…especially when you fit so perfectly against him under the warm blankets that shielded you both from the winter morning air.

“let’s sleep a little longer, i guess,” he whispered, ruining the minute silence that surrounded you both. “i just got a little excited for presents…sorry.” of course he did; your boyfriend was still a little kid at heart. he sealed his apology with a kiss on your forehead before closing his eyes once again. he figured he’d make you breakfast with hot cocoa as an apology for waking you up so early on a christmas morning.

[omahasnakes]

2022: Hi motherfuckers, did you miss me?

(A return to my dumb project of listening to the Billboard year-end top 100 chart and trying to make sense of it as a middle-aged person.)

I’ve been home since 2020. I’ve been twerking and making smoothies. It’s called healing?

There was a period of a couple of months in 2023 where I would wake up in the morning to one of my maddening-to-others alarm clock songs, probably “Rosanna” by Toto, and then I would immediately listen to the first half of Lizzo’s 2022 album Special, just to get myself out of bed. ANYWAYYYYY. “About Damn Time” is the only song from Special that charted in the top 100 in 2022, which surprised me, but it’s clearly song of the year for me by that metric. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXXxciRUMzE

If it was anyone’s year, and we are all starting to learn not to say “this year is going to be MY YEAR”, there were seven songs by Bad Bunny, all from the album Un Verano Sin Ti and six by Doja Cat (four from Planet Her).

“Big Energy” by Latto: runner-up song of the year. This is another defiant tough-girl anthem to listen to while you drag yourself out of bed to continue trying to live your shattered life in early 2023. Of course we can also talk about the prominent sampling of sample-darling “Genius of Love” by Tom Tom Club- I ended up getting more and more into Tom Tom Club based on this, and I played “Genius of Love” for my classes one day when we were on Zoom, and it got a rare comment from a student! The kids are alright.

“Running up that Hill” by Kate Bush: I was an undergrad in the days of Windows share files, and I downloaded most of Kate Bush’s discography that way. Because of that, my Kate Bush fandom always felt very much in a vacuum. So I’m excited that this struck such a cultural nerve when it appeared in Stranger Things! Everybody get on the weird Kate Bush train with me! Next we’re going to listen to a song that pretty straightforwardly explains the plot of Wuthering Heights!

“Unholy” by Sam Smith and Kim Petras. We don’t have guilty pleasures anymore, just pleasures. Sam Smith performs a cool different arrangement of this at the end of their Tiny Desk concert that I also really enjoyed. I can’t defend this or my bad taste, so I can only present it without further comment.

“good 4 u” by Olivia Rodrigo stuck around on the chart from last year, one of a few breakup songs. Well, it’s 2022 and I have no use for breakup songs, so I’ll just file these away for never!

“Bad Habit” by Steve Lacy: a Smart Music Person corroborated that this song and the album Gemini Rights are Good. You can take issue with me and my bad taste, but a broken clock is right twice a day, and you can’t argue with a Smart Music Person.

It is right and correct that “All I Want for Christmas is You” should chart year after year, but you all need to cool it with this stuff that just plays as a mix after that song ends: “Jingle Bell Rock”, “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree”, “A Holly Jolly Christmas”: we gotta get this outta here by next year!! When I come back for 2023, I expect that you’ll have that taken care of.

I try not to go down too many rabbit holes on these charts, because there are 100 songs and I have to move on to the next chart before I’m driven mad, but my research senpai Rachel pointed out that this chart includes 14 songs that carried over from the previous year, which I am starting to notice as well. My theory is that streaming encourages this more than terrestrial radio, which was always pushing new songs on us. Streaming is perfectly happy to have us listen to the same song over and over, sobbing quietly in the car.

Country music barometer: 26% Our society is truly lost.

“Buy Dirt” by Jordan Davis and Luke Bryan: the single most reactionary song on the chart. You: But it’s just a nice song about traditional values. Me: [seagull inhaling meme]

AA by Walker Hayes: I guess we didn’t all get the memo that sex work is work and pole dancing is art.

Rachel is also great for dumb questions like “Is Morgan Wallen one of the bad ones?” because she’s got the references and receipts and she knows how to Find Things. Also, yeah. He had one song on the chart this year that I thought was fine, “Sand in my Boots” but now he’s a non-starter.

“One Mississippi” by Kane Brown is another one for the country category of “this is fine.” It’s not the genre I object to anymore, it’s the reactionary politics and stagnant style, which now that I put the conjunction between the two phrases, they make perfect sense together.

Lest you think I’m being too hard on country music, this chart also features a song called “PUFFIN ON ZOOTIEZ” (caps lock theirs) and a shocking #9 finish for “Super Gremlin” by Kodak Black, a cool-sounding song that features some real classic homophobia I didn’t expect from 2022 and a prominent r-slur.

On the other hand, 10% of the songs were in Spanish! (Both of these statistics are from my own very rough counts, don’t roast me.)

Programming note: now that my algorithm is truly and permanently fucked, I’m planning to listen to the 1996 chart as a palate cleaner before diving in to the cursed 2023 chart.

[tgon]

Ghosts of Fear Street, Fright Christmas | Review

Title: Ghosts of Fear Street #15 – Fright Christmas Author: Stephen Roos (as by R.L. Stine) Cover Artist: John Youssi

INTRODUCTION

The cover artwork got my hopes up. Never before has Silent Night looked so loud loud loud! Unfortunately the plot is less interesting. The ghostwriter must have organized a White Elephant Plot Exchange, because the entire story is lifted from A Christmas Carol. It’s safe to assume R.L. Stine forgot this book exists, too, because he penned his own adaptation of the Dickens classic in 2017 entitled Young Scrooge.

I was fully prepared to skip this book. Bah humbug. But last night I was visited by The Ghost Of Christmas Past. The spectre said unto me, “Fright Christmas had an audiobook adaptation in 1997 starring Kieran Culkin. This wasn’t the most successful Christmas project for the Culkins, but skipping it could be seen as an insult. If they have the power to put a star in Hollywood Boulevard for Macaulay, think about how easily they could put you in the ground!”

Well, I’ve had a sudden change of heart. Let’s give this book a chance! One last toast to has-been ghosts, the review will be soon.

STORY REVIEW

Kenny Frobisher is less of a “peace on earth” guy and more of a “piece of work” guy. When his sister visits Santa in the mall, Kenny spoils the occasion by calling it all fake. He even rips Mall Santa’s beard off! Maybe Kenny is banking on the resale value of coal. Anyways, Kenny wisely dips out after the beard stunt sparks a child riot. He sneaks into a secret control room, pushing past a big sign that says DANGER! KEEP OUT! So maybe Kenny is also banking on the resale value of Darwin Awards.

Kenny decides to flip some random switches, which was quality entertainment in a pre-internet America. This great plan backfires when Kenny locks himself in. Kenny fears that the ghostwriter is copying another story from the 1840s ⁠— until the door mysteriously creaks open. He emerges to discover an abandoned mall. He must have stayed past closing time. Or maybe he timetraveled to the early 2020s.

Santa rises from the shadows, but this fella ain’t holly-jolly. He looks ticked. Truly chilling. If that doesn’t scare you, have you considered SANTA is an anagram for SATAN? Truly chilling. Kenny yanks down on Santa’s beard, but this one doesn’t detach. Uh oh. Santa reprimands Kenny for his naughtiness and warns that the boy will be visited by three spirits. Kenny flees to Dalby’s Department Store, which is a cute bit of continuity, as this store is an important location in the main Fear Street series. Kenny decides it’s a super good time to nap on one of the luxury beds. Yes he’s trapped in a mall and haunted by ghosts, but it’s 8:59 (PM!!) and he’s sleepy, dagnabbit.

Kenny wakes up to the revving of a motorcycle. He meets an intimidating biker named Night Watchman. The guy claims he’s been watching Kenny all the time, but I guess “All Hours Watchman” doesn’t sound cool. This dude shows Kenny a flashback, a day when Kenny bullied some kid named “Tiny Timmy” in front of the whole school. Of course, Kenny enjoys revisiting this memory. To keep his grip on the situation, Night Watchman simply rams Kenny with his bike. Truly an underrated rhetorical strategy.

Eyes snapping open, Kenny finds himself back in the department store. The bed has been torn to shreds. He meets a wintery ghost named Ice Man. This fixes a huge problem in the original Dickens story: the total lack of wrestler-style character names. Ice Man whisks Kenny away to show him how the Frobishers are handling Christmas Eve without their son. Kenny’s sister seems pretty upset, but Mr. Frobisher offers helpful advice such as

“These things happen, honey.”

Think that sounds cold? Turns out, the family is only sad because their dog is lost. They haven’t even noticed Kenny is gone. I guess if you live on Fear Street, you develop an Oregon Trail mindset. Sometimes we have two kids, sometimes we have one kid, oh well what can you do.

Kenny is woken once more, this time by techno lights and crazy music, and he finds himself in an open grave. After all, you can’t spell GRAVE without RAVE. There’s also an unknown figure skulking around above him. Kenny pleas for help, but the figure turns out to be a hooded ghost. The spooky dude points a skeleton-finger at Kenny, and a hoard of ghost kids descend on our protagonist. Oh my God, they killed Kenny!

Back in the mall again, an electrician shakes Kenny awake. The boy fell asleep in the control room. Feeling a sudden change of heart, he buys a gift for his sister. When Kenny gets home, the family dog has indeed gone missing, just like in his dream. Luckily, Tiny Timmy happened to catch the dog and returns it, upgrading him to Regular Timmy. But then Timmy reveals a spooky skeleton-finger, signifying that he was the mysterious ghost from Kenny’s dream. I made a visual aid to convey the terror.

THE VERDICT

If you’d like to create your own adaptation of A Christmas Carol, it might be beneficial to follow this simple set of rules: Don’t.

So concludes our third Biennial Holiday Special. Maybe by 2025, Elon Musk will buy this blog for billions of dollars and replace me with an AI. If you don’t want me replaced by a robot (or maybe you chuckled while reading this entry), feel free to leave a like or drop a message.

BEST QUOTE

“Sorry, Kenny,” Dad said softly. “We were reading A Christmas Carol. I know how you hate it.” “Not anymore, Dad,” I said, […] “I love it! It’s one of my favorite stories now!”

Why? At what point was that experience anything other than traumatizing?

[twobillionseconds]

December 23rd - December 25th 2023

December 23rd:

Couldn't really fall asleep the night before. Maybe it's because I had to wake up early. Anyway dropped the dog off and headed to the airport. Normal flight and I made it to the hotel. Took a brief nap and the wife and I went to the beach. We walked around and got a drink. After we headed back to get ready for dinner. Went to a pizza place and after stopped by Jack Kerouac's place for a drink and stopped by the hotel bar. Watched some Kitchen Nightmare's and went to bed.

December 24th:

Woke up late. Picked up some coffee and lounged around the hotel. I had a late checkout so why not. After walking the wife back to the apartment I headed to the airport. I hung out at the airport. There was no one there. Normal flight. After the flight I rushed to pick up my dog. Came home and decided to play some video games and drink. I had some left overs and had that for dinner. I went to bed late.

December 25th:

Merry Christmas. Woke up late and took the dog for a walk. Drove up to LA to see my parents. We had lunch and hung out a bit. I took the my dog for a walk around my parent's place. Had a heart to heart with my brother. Was hoping I could see some friends but they were busy. I guess that's what happens when you have kids. Anyway drove home and had a late dinner. Played a bit more games and I think I'll head to bed.

[okwonyo]

once bitten and twice shy.

엔하이픈 ୨୧ female reader seven hundred fluff established relationship + cw. not-proofread kissing skinship cursing ( other )

heeseung

doesn't hesitate to kiss you when he sees a mistletoe. it's almost as if he goes everywhere there can be some so he can have an excuse to put his lips on yours. “heeseung, if you want to kiss just say so..” “what? no it's destiny, stop saying stupidities”

doesn't know how to wrap gift for the life of him— always ends with the scotch glued to his hands and the whole table in a complete mess. each year, you make fun of him before showing him how to do.

jongseong

is actually the best gift giver ever, his gifts are always so on point and exactly what you wanted without even you asking for it. most of the time, they are so hard to find so it was just an unrealistic gift to you. but, he loves to see you happy.

decide to take you out some night without any warning— doesn't take you to a restaurant or anything, in fact you stay in the car the whole time. he drives to whole night to make you both see the lights in the neighborhood and in the city.

jaeyun

loves to bake with your for christmas— especially biscuits with a lot of decoration on it (candies, powder sugar...). therefore, the twenty-fourth of december, you both wake up early and bake the whole day so you can eat it at night. i can picture him gently placing his hands over yours to help you hold the walls of the gingerbread house up.

insists on going to market to see santa every year so he can he get a picture with him. does it mainly to make you laugh, seeing him swing his feet as he spills his gifts list never fails to make you laugh.

sunghoon

looks up for the wrost and the most unfunny jokes he can annoy you with as soon as christmas season starts. you could be getting ready to get out and he'd come to you and say “ho ho holy shit, you look so good” with a proud smile on his face.

as soon as the cold winter starts, he puts on christmas songs at any given moments and makes you both dance to them. for instance, you would be cooking and he'd put on a christmas song then. coming to you as he starts dancing, he'd take your hand and make you twirl.

seonwoo

loves to decorate the tree a lot, with an assortment of baubles, lights and tinsel. and, when it's time to put on the star or the angel on the top, he lifts you up so you can reach it. it's your favorite thing about decorating the tree, and it's also his.

when it's time for the gifts— he'd rather have you both sitting down on the floor and exchange gifts and trying to guess what the gifts may be. he loves to see your reactions although attempting to find out what you bought for him, “is it cool or is it another pair of socks..”

jungwon

organizes a indoor picnic— next to the warm of the fireplace, with some candles for a romantic vibe that goes perfectly with the music in the background. ordered your favorite food and successfully surprised you.

buys ugly christmas sweaters for the both of you to wear on the twenty-fifth. made sure to choose the most atrocious looking ones, to be perfectly in christmas spirit.

riki

waits patiently for the first fall of snow, watch the weather every day carefully. then, when it finally comes, he drags you outside. makes all sorts of things with the snow— snowballs to either throw them on you or making a snowman with them, angels, falling on it and more.

bickers with you over which christmas movie is the best every single year. he doesn't even take it as seriously as he used to anymore, it's more like a tradition between the two of you now.

merry christmas!

taglist open ❕@manooffline @ibsysbsfsunsbs @nwjws @lilriswife4life @alaezasmystery235 @teddywonss @tyussday @cholexc @flickqr @yuviqik @wvnrqs @strawberrywonz @y-ves @isawritesss @filmofhybe @ikeucakes @gweoriz @yunabi436 @ashtxrie @soul-is-a-strange-kid @jaelaxies @jwonsluvr networks @k-films @kflixnet @/k-labels

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #123

What do you like about the house you live in? I mean, the house itself is nice. But I absolutely despise its location, and the fact our landlord is a very long-time family friend (she was actually mine and my older sister's science teacher in high school, and our families really connected when she met me and I shut the disrespectful-ass class the fuck up for not listening to her)... and it just complicates things. Primarily because Tobey is 500% the person who will NEVER let you forget the great kindnesses she does for you; she wants endless recognition for doing good things. She's can also be REMARKABLY rude, just shoving her nose into business that is never hers, fully intent on giving her uneducated opinion (this woman, who has zero kids, literally asked my mom's former co-worker "shouldn't [your LITERAL INFANT son] not be nursing anymore?", and oh my god Ariel almost fucking decked her). Tobey is just A LOT. My whole family - Mom especially - can barely stand her anymore, but it's not like we can do much when she literally owns the house she doesn't charge full rent for, but only because otherwise we'd still be homeless.

Have you ever played paintball? Did you get hit? No, and it absolutely does not look fun.

How do you feel today? Tell me about it. I'm okay now, but it's been a tired day. I was physically unable to sleep 'til past 3 AM this morning because I was experiencing a fully active anxiety attack for over an hour, but it'd been building up for more. I had to miss PT today because it was scheduled early and I texted my mom at like, 2 AM telling her to not wake me up because I needed sleep so fucking badly.

Do you ever use a laptop in bed? Not anymore, because I quite literally lived in bed with laptops for many years approaching my trauma, and it was this behavior that caused my leg muscles to eventually atrophy. Nowadays, the mere idea of chilling in bed for just a little while with it makes me freak out, I just can't let myself.

Are you wearing socks right now? What color are they? No; I actually really, really dislike socks. I will only ever wear them if I put on normal shoes, but I almost solely wear flipflops. It's a sensory thing, I just REALLY hate the feeling of them.

Are your parents still together? If not, do you know why? No. Financial shit, supposedly Dad cheating on Mom with his now-wife and Dad also being suspicious that SHE was cheating (I'm fully aware she didn't), and Mom has said that he was also making certain sexual demands that led to more fighting. Eventually one day while only Dad and I were home (Mom and Nicole were out of town at a dance competition), he packed a suitcase and just left. I still distinctly remember him peeking into my room and asking if I'd be fine alone, and I said yes because I thought he was just going out to do something and be back. For some dumb fucking reason I didn't immediately figure it out when I saw the suitcase.

Have you ever been evicted? Why? Yes, because Mom couldn't keep up with rent.

Would you say you’re an organized person? For the most part, I think. I've absolutely noticed I've been becoming more organized lately, as well as more attentive to tidying stuff up. Which I'm fucking ecstatic about, because I struggle with that stuff.

Have you ever worked as a manager or supervisor? Ha, no.

Do you eat at a table or on the couch? Usually the couch, and depending on what we're having we might take out small foldable tables to sit in front of us. We usually only eat at the table for more formal occasions like Christmas, or if we have certain company.

What was the last thing you voted for? Probably a Tumblr poll, haha.

Do you remember much from high school? My memories of high school are, for the most part, almost scarily vivid. I remember the smallest details. My memories of the years with Jason are specifically so aggressively trained into my brain, and we started dating when I was a sophomore. And guess what, I DON'T remember my freshman year all that well.

What’s the longest you’ve ever stayed awake? Why did you do it? Around three days, because I was manic.

Have you ever been wrongfully accused of something? Yeah, I think most people have at some point. Nothing like, criminal, but other things.

What are the five apps on your phone that you use most often? Instagram, Facebook, Tumblr, Pinterest, and Discord.

Would you change your name if you got married? I do plan on taking Girt's surname if we get married, even though I hate his more than I do mine, haha. I just want to. I feel like I would with any other partner too, of any gender.

Were you in any clubs in high school? Yes: Honors and Art Honors. Uh, maybe one more? I can't remember.

Do you share a bathroom with anyone? Yeah. Mom will usually use the one in her room, but sometimes she'll just use the hall one. The hall one is what everyone else uses that comes here, too.

Have you ever had a panic attack? Ohhhh yes. They are honestly one of THE scariest things you can experience. I'm more prone to anxiety attacks, though.

What’s your favourite kind of frosting? It's hard to go wrong with chocolate.

Have you ever taken a painting class? Yes, during my last college attempt. My instructor told me I was really good at it (she said I was one of the class' best, but I think she mighta just been saying that when she learned I might be dropping out), but I definitely begged to differ. I wasn't bad at it, but more than anything I just found painting extremely stressful with how damaging mistakes can be. Yeah, you can wait for something to dry and paint over it, but that doesn't always work and sometimes it's also just very noticeable that you covered something. I felt too much pressure to get everything right. I also HATED that we couldn't like, sketch with a pencil or something first.

Is there a store or restaurant where you’re considered a regular? No.

How old were you when you started wearing a bra, if ever? Oh I don't remember.

What was the last video game you played? Some of the Spyro: Ripto's Rage! remake, quite a while ago. Girt and I have been going back and forth between that and Silent Hill 2, but we haven't played for a lil while. OH, I played World of Warcraft for maybe not even 15 minutes earlier, but that's a computer game. Still a game though, so w/e.

Are there any recipes you really want to try? BROSEPH my sister Misty recently shared a picture + recipe of an alcoholic beverage named after the Aurora Borealis because of the colors and holy FUCKING shit I want to try it. Girt's sister also shares recipes on FB a lot and basically every single one I see I want to try, girl let me move in 😭

Has anyone asked how you feel today? No. Girt pretty much always does at some point, but today's a work day for him so he's busy. He'll be over tonight though.

What’s your favourite cookie? Uh, probably just a soft chocolate chip one.

Do you have a doorbell at your house? Yes.

Have you ever visited someone in a psychiatric home or ward? No, I was always the one being visited. My older sister was in one following an abusive relationship, but I know I never visited. I don't know why... The hospital was far away though, so maybe that. Or I was just scared of mental hospitals because I hadn't been in one yet, but was definitely dealing with mental illness. I would absolutely believe that perhaps I was afraid of it upsetting me too much.

What was the last podcast you listened to? Do you listen to it regularly? I can't remember what it was called, but it was with Girt and basically told true murder mystery stories. The guy was a great storyteller, I was really into it.

When was the last time you threw up? Why were you sick? It's been years since I actually did, back when I was on a medicine my body really didn't agree with, but not even a week ago I think, I woke up feeling sick as hell and when I actually got up, ended up sitting on the bathroom floor in front of the toilet, actively fighting vomiting. Like it was THERE, I just didn't let myself; if I'd accepted "I need to puke" and actually looked at the toilet, I absolutely would've hurled. This happened while I was on my period, and it was THE most aggressively symptomatic period I've had in my *ENTIRE* life, so I blame it entirely on that.

What was the last thing you wrote in a word document? This survey, haha. Because I combine so many, they take a while and I use it to save progress.

Do you know anybody who is gay and married? I'm pretty sure I do? I know he's gay, but I can't remember if he's married... but I think so.

What did you last take painkillers for? A monstrous headache that resulted from extreme stress and anxiety, and then crying too.

Are there any hobbies you want to get back into? ugh I need to start DRAWING again

Have you ever shared a home with a friend? Not legally, but basically, with both Jason (and our two friends that were also a couple) as well as Colleen, each for a few months. I... think, in the apartment w/ Jason case. I really can't remember clearly how long I was there.

Have you ever been on a date with someone you met online? How was it? Well, technically. Sara was an online friend first for a very long time, then we dated long-distance, but we did go on a breakfast date once while I was there.

Do you call it a couch, sofa, lounge or something else entirely? Couch.

When was the last time you used a pair of headphones and what for? Right now; I'm listening to the German version of "Monsoon" by Tokio Hotel. I love the original, but this one is even more beautiful.

What sort of games do you like to play? My absolute favorite is horror games, especially those that are psychological horror, and NEVER shit that is just solely a jumpscare fest. Put some SUBSTANCE into your horror games, man, versus just triggering a natural body reaction to surprise. I also adore games set in a completely fantasy universe; the bigger and more complete the world, + the more unique it is, the better (I think Elden Ring is the best example of this that I've EVER encountered, FromSoft knows how to fuckin do it). I love nostalgia games too, specifically Spyro (honestly, almost ANY game with a big dragon focus are automatic wins for me, haha), and I've invested an insane amount of time (literally over a full year of collective playtime, seeing it makes me want to unalive lmfao) into World of Warcraft, which is an MMORPG. It's the only MMO I've played though BECAUSE of how severely I was once addicted to it; I'm afraid to try any other ones because I never want to relive how dependent I once was on a game. I only got better when I had no choice but to stop for over a year, maybe even near two; even when I first started playing it again, I had anxiety attacks every night for a good few days because I was so scared it was going to happen again, but thank GOD it didn't. I still play it a lot, just because I have such an empty schedule and it's a strong way to kill time, but I'm able to have days where I'm like "eh I don't wanna log on" so don't, and I'm also keen to do other things if something more exciting is presented to me, especially if it involves family or friends. That once wasn't the case.

Have you ever been to a baby shower? What was the baby’s name? Yeah; my sister had one for all of her kids (which she didn't want, but was encouraged by others for various reasons): Aubree, Ryder, and Emerson. I know I also attended my former dance teacher's for her second child, Caydance (yes she literally spelled it that way because of "dance" lmfao), and MAYBE her first, Colton, but I don't remember it. Then there was Jenn's, Jason's brother's wife, for their first son I'm still fucking devastated I never got to meet and love, Dominic. I was lucky I even got to go to it, because Jason and I had already broken up very recently. That day was honestly awful because I learned he was already talking to another girl <333333 I think that's everyone's I've been to.

What mode of transport did you take to high school? Mom drove us.

Name a personality trait of yours that you like. I cherish and am very thankful that I'm deeply empathetic.

Name something about your physical attraction that you dislike. More than anything else, my weight. I don't inherently think fat people are ugly, at all, but of COURSE I think so for myself.

What gifts do you usually receive at Easter? Just some candies from Mom. I'm sure she'll get a Voltage for me too, because of how I've been avoiding soda but always miss it.

Who was the last person you sent an email to? It was just a link for my mom to look at.

Are there any posters in your bedroom? Yes, but I'm probably taking them all down (maybe I'll keep the meerkat one up) when I FINALLY redecorate my room to a more minimal, nature theme. Before that happens though, I honestly need more decor to prevent my room from being depressingly blank.

Do you know anyone who is an actor? Pretty sure no? I feel like I know at LEAST one person who's been in a small project or something, but definitely no bigger actors.

How many weddings have you been to? Bobby (brother) and his ex-wife Scarlet's, Randi (another - and my favorite - dance teacher) & Shane's, Jonathan & Jenn's, and uh... I feel like that's it? At least, as far as attending on a personal level. I did take pictures of my sister's friend Meg's wedding, as well as this random bitch named Shonda's who never paid me more than the $15 sitting fee (and I shot the whole-ass wedding process from preparation to finish while dying of dehydration in the summer hell-heat and did entirely thorough postproduction, YES I'm still fucking salty), as well as Bethany & Spencer's, a brilliant couple who's had me take a lot of pictures. Besides Ashley, they were THE most supportive people of getting my name out there as a photographer, and they actually learned about me through Ash.

Do you watch YouTube? What channels do you like? LITERALLY constantly, haha. I'm either watching something on the side or have music on. These days I've been most into watching Game Grumps, John Wolfe, WoolieVS, jacksepticeye, and Gab Smolders, but I enjoy SO many more.

What’s your alcohol of choice? Fruity, sweet stuff, like sangrias. There can't be a strong alcohol concentration, because that taste is total shit.

Have you ever used a public pay phone? No.

Do you have a Twitter account? It EXISTS, but is only ever used for like, giveaway stuff if there's one shown on a different social platform that I'm VERY into. That kinda stuff doesn't even happen once a year, probably.

What’s the longest you’ve been without showering? As someone who struggles with this, especially before I had a shower chair, I'm not comfortable sharing this.

Name one of your guilty pleasure songs. Y'all I fuckin love "Flesh" by Simon Curtis 😭😭😭 and honestly a lot of Hot songs slowed down w/ reverb help me PLEASE

Have you ever made an item of clothing? No.

What was the last topic you read about? Various social justice statistics.

Name some of your favourite sitcoms. That '70s Show is #1, but other notable ones I enjoy are The Nanny, The Golden Girls, The Munsters, The Addams Family, The Beverly Hillbillies, and I Love Lucy. Most of those I was kinda raised with by watching with my mom. <3

Who is the 7th contact in your phone and how did you meet them? [TW: RAPE] Katie. She's my mom's oldest child. I can't remember how old I was when I actually met her though; Mom had to pretty much give Katie up for adoption because she was alone and couldn't care for her (after being kicked out of her home because she was literally drugged and date-raped out of wedlock, her mom was fuckin' peachy), and it was only later in life when Katie was an adult that I met her. I don't remember it at all, though.

What shirt do you wear the most? If they're clean, my go-to tank tops are generally either of my candy skull ones; I'm almost always in tank tops because that's what I sleep in. If we're talking NORMAL shirts, definitely my "equal in our bones" Cloak one.

Has anyone ever come out to you? Yes, an old school friend. I don't remember her name anymore.

Have you ever been part of a bridal or groom’s party? My sister's, yes. Idk if this counts as being in their party, but at Jonathan & Jenn's wedding, I was seated at the main table with Jonathan's family, beside Jason. Actually this reminded me, the picture that was used for their mother's obituary was a shot from the wedding, of her smiling and dancing, and you can see me seated there in the background. Seeing that picture on Facebook basically stabbed me in the fucking heart, like it physically hurt, because it reminded me that I was once there in her life, but wasn't any longer. I think I'm going to die grieving the fact I never got to tell her goodbye.

Are there any rooms in your house that don’t have windows? Yes, both bathrooms.

What’s your go-to order from KFC? I don't go there.

What was the last album you listened to in full? Uh I'm not sure, but probably one of Rammstein's when I decided to go through their entire discography lmfao

[365daysofj2]

Getting To Know You (Factory Boys, 2/?)

Jared doesn’t wake up until almost 4:30. He can’t wait to really sleep over the Christmas break. It’s only 3 days, so he’ll still have to stay up all night so he doesn’t get off his schedule. But he’s used to that by now. He’s been on third shift for over a year. 

He makes a microwave noodle bowl for lunch and texts Jensen when he sits down to eat. Hey Jensen, it’s Jared from the factory. How was your day?

Jensen texts back pretty quickly. It’s busy season at the church, too. I had a lot to do today, ended up staying an extra 2 hours. So I haven’t been home that long.

Oh, I’m sorry, Jared replies. I bet you’ll be happy when Christmas is over.

I will. Four services in two days is a *lot*, Jensen sends back. 

Wow, yeah. Do you have to go to all of them?

No, I’m probably just going to the early service on Christmas Eve, Jensen answers. 

When is that?

2 pm on Saturday.

Jared works till 7:00 AM Saturday, so he’s not sure he’d want to get up that early to go to church. Not that he wants to go to church necessarily, but he really wants to see Jensen, and if that’s where he’s going to be, Jared is more than willing to show up. 

I work Friday night, so that’s a little early for me, Jared responds.

Would you rather go to the 7 pm one? asks Jensen. That’s the one with the kids’ pageant, so it’s a little chaotic.

I have nieces and nephews, I’m fine with chaos, Jared writes back, adding a smiley face emoji to the end. But I don’t want to mess up your plans.

I wouldn’t call them ‘plans’, exactly, replies Jensen. I just go to the early service because I have a friend from my old job in the choir. But I’d love to have you there, so if you want to go later, I’m fine with that, Jensen replies, with the blushing smiley face at the end.

Jared can’t help but grin widely. He eats a few more bites before responding. Thank you. I really appreciate it. And I’m really looking forward to seeing you again.

You mean I’m not going to see you in the meantime?Jensen adds a slight frown to the end.

I can stop by the store, but I don’t have a day off till Christmas Eve, Jared sends back. Are you doing family stuff for Christmas?

I don’t have family in the area, replies Jensen. My family’s in Texas. What about you?

No way! That’s where I’m from. Jared wonders if that’s why they clicked so well. I came up here because I got a scholarship to Penn State. I did my internship at the plant and then got a full-time job when I graduated. My younger sister came up here too but my parents and my brother’s family are still in San Antonio.

That’s pretty much what I did, only I went to Elizabethtown, Jensen writes back. My parents insisted I go to a Christian college, and Etown was the most liberal Christian school I could find.

Jared doesn’t know much about Etown other than that it’s not far from Hershey. He’s seen signs for it on Route 283, but he’s never seen the campus. That’s cool, Jared tells him. So is your family really strict?

Yeah, that’s why I stayed here, replies Jensen. They weren’t cool with my lifestyle, if you know what I mean.

Jared definitely does. He’s lucky that his whole family is totally fine with him being bi, and would welcome any boyfriend he brought home with open arms. That’s not that common in Texas. 

I’m sorry, Jared writes back after a short pause. I’m guessing your church is supportive?

Oh yeah, that’s why I chose it, says Jensen. Pastor Kim has a trans daughter, so she’s incredibly accepting of LGBTQ people. I wouldn’t have joined if they didn’t affirm.

I’m glad you have a community that accepts you, Jared writes, and he fully means it. He can’t imagine having to move halfway across the country just to be able to be yourself. 

Thank you. Maybe if I bring you then the little old ladies will stop trying to fix me up with their grandsons, Jensen replies with a laughing emoji at the end.

Jared has to laugh at that too. Well, feel free to introduce me as your boyfriend, he writes before he realizes how forward that might sound. 

When Jensen doesn’t text back right away, Jared worries that he’s screwed up. He finishes his lunch and cleans up before Jensen responds. Sorry, I had to answer a call. You really want to be my boyfriend?

Well, if the position is open… Jared writes back. What do I have to do to apply?

Jared just about loses his mind watching the three dots blink as Jensen composes a reply. Well, coming to church with me is a good start. Coming to dinner at my house on Christmas Day would be even better.

I’m definitely down for that, Jared replies. Should I bring anything?

Do you cook?

Not well, Jared writes back, adding an upside-down smiley at the end. 

Then just your charming self is fine, Jensen responds, with a wink emoji.

Do you drink? I could bring wine.

That would be great, writes Jensen. I’m making roast chicken, so that’s white wine, I think.

There’s this great winery in Colonial Park. I’ll see what they recommend. 

Don’t go to any trouble, Jensen replies. 

No trouble at all, Jared assures him. I love the place. A friend of mine introduced me to it. I should take you there sometime.

I’d love that, Jensen replies, with a smiley face. I’m gonna start dinner, so I’ll talk to you later. Maybe tomorrow, after I’m done at the store? 

Sounds good to me, writes Jared. It was really nice talking to you. He adds a big smile emoji and sends the text.

Yeah, it was. Have a good night. Don’t work too hard. Jensen ends the message with the hug emoji. 

I’ll try not to, Jared replies, adding the heart smiley.