#i guess i'm still doing these even tho no one cares anymore

[minimoll7]

Just realized one of my favorite mutuals blocked me :( we used to be really close friends back in the day to, so even tho we weren't talking anymore, I still greatly enjoyed seeing him on my dash and all

I knew it was gonna happen eventually but it still kind of hurts

[unluckilyimnot]

hiîi, can you write bllk chara tera introducing their gf to the press or the press somehow finding you that the players have a gf

idk if this makes sense but pleaseee write it I love your blog sm <3

The press found out about their relationship - Rin, Sae, Kaiser, Isagi, Karasu

m.list | rules

Note : hii ! Thank you sm for your request! I take some times to go through some of my requests before writing with another media I'm really into rn, sorry some will wait a bit mor

Same as the others ! There wasn't anyone mentioned but don't hesitate to ask for your fav if you want ♡

Rin

He's not fan of it

I guess he adapted to it quickly, you being bring on a lot the first few weeks and things like that

But he's so tensed about it you have to calm him down a lot at first

He's upset all the time You have to remind him that's it's not only a bad things

And that people's reactions has been relatively good, that's already a good point

He's more worried about you obviously but in the end you're the one taking care of him

He feels a bit bad but yeah, he appreciates it a lot

Don't expect a lot of changes tho, he doesn't want his love life all over the internet

Sae

He's annoyed when the press found out, to say the least

He wish it could've stay private and doesn't want people to be after you

He hates the fact that he's ask about it now and has to be even more cold in interview than before

He tries to be unbothered but knowing how it changed your life it's impossible

Behind closed door at first he can spend a lot of time with you so make it up

He's famous so I think people tried to know more about you and invade your personal space

I don't think it necessarily goes wrong on social media, it's just trending a lot for a few days

You have to moderate your account a lot cause there's always hater

He still doesn't talk about you bc you asked him to

but he feel less pressure if some pictures of you two end up in the internet

Kaiser

He's ANGRY

Don't get it wrong, he thought about revealing your relationship a few times and you were still talking about it

But this happening without his consent or yours drive him crazy at first

Yet on camera he's cocky about it, telling he doesn't mind and rumbling about how gorgeous you are

He takes the opportunity as it is and posy about you more on his social media, without hiding you so much

He has his lawer ready to anyone spitting shit at you on social media tho

Don't mess with his s/o, he'll take actions

Isagi

He's lost poor guy

If you cry about it he does his absolute best to comfort you before contacting his agent to see what he can do

Honestly He's use to it but if you're not used to the fame, he's careful so your anxiety don't go crazy

He's sad if that change your life a lot but he does his best to not change a thing in your routine

The good point is that, like Kaiser, he can pray a lot more with you than before and he's really happy about it !!

He likes to share with people I think so it open a lot of doors

Karasu

He acts cool in front of the camera but he's annoyed

It was early in your relationship and he's scared it's gonna fucked it up

You have to be the one comforting him

You're not the type to make promises if you're not sure of yourself, but you assure him that the press and people finding out didn't scared you

You'll stay with him as long as possible, you don't see yourself leaving because of this

He's probably needed this more than he would've admit cause after this, being on camera is easier again

He's not upset anymore if they ask about you since you gave him a green light

He feels even lighter than before, in fact

[echobx]

Everyone has a Price (part 4) - Rafe × virgin!fem!reader

summary: y/n is angry at Rafe but after a fight that end with them in the sheets, they figure out a way to stop talking past each other and instead start talking with each other

word count: 1.8k

warnings: angsty, miscommunication, verbal fighting, hate/make up sex, smut, p in v (unprotected), oral (fem receiving), riding him, vulnerable moments, fluffy

author's note: hmmm, idk fr this time. the table thing tho...

kinktober masterlist ✘ series masterlist

   When you wake up, you're back in the pool house, and it makes you feel dirty in a way, like he doesn't want you in his bed for more than just sex. The note on your bedside table is an explanation for it, but it doesn't soothe your mind much. 

   “Business meetings all day long. I'm sorry. I'll see you tonight.” It reads before you ball it up and throw it away. You tell yourself that you don't need him anyway. The deal is done. He got what he paid for, and you can forget he exists and quickly leave before he gets back. That's what you should definitely do. 

   The phone ringing drags you back to reality, and when you pick it up, it's none other than Rafe on the other end of the line. 

   “Did you sleep well?” he asks, and you pick at the comforter that is still draped over you. 

   “Did you bring me down here?” you ask, annoyed still. 

   “Yes, I sleep alone, always,” he explains, but it still stings. 

   “I'm going home today. The deal is done,” you say, and he doesn't know if he's heard you correctly.

   “You- You can't go home yet. You still have a few days left here.” 

   “The contract was fulfilled. I don't owe you anything anymore,” you say and hang up the phone. You are aware that his blood is probably boiling right now, but you don't see why you should stay. He didn't mean what he said the night before, he was just drunk on sex, surely. 

   An hour later, you have your things packed and are standing ready to pull your suitcase out of the front door and walk all the way to the airport if you need to, but someone is standing in your way. 

   “Let me leave,” you tell Grayson, but he shakes his head. 

   “Boss said he needs to talk to you before you leave. So, no, I can't let you leave.” 

   “That's illegal. That's kidnapping!” you yell and stomp your feet like a child, but the huge man won't budge. 

   You go to sit on the couch inside, trying to watch a movie to get your mind off how much you hate that Rafe won't let you leave and put a clear-cut on your situation. But he comes by two hours later, storming into the pool house, furious with you, mostly. 

   “What the fuck do you think you're doing?” he snaps, and you shrug, you don't even care to look at him. 

   “We had a deal, but I guess I'm the only one playing by the rules here,” you say, holding your head up high until his hand closes around your throat, and you lose your composure. 

   “Don't make me,” Rafe hisses. He's not hurting you, just holding you in place. 

   “You got what you wanted, now let me leave,” you say, feeling a hot tear run down your face. 

   “What I wanted was a quick fuck, not some spoiled bitch to fumble my fucking brain,” he barks and pulls you up to force a kiss onto your lips. You don't even try to push him off, maybe because you wouldn't manage anyway, but mostly because you don't want to. 

   “Why are you not fighting me? You wanna leave, then fight for it!” he spits in your face. 

   “You're an asshole, you know that? You treat me like I'm a whore!” you finally snap and push him off you. 

   “I didn't sell my body,” Rafe hits back, and you feel like you could slap him. 

   “Yet you bought me. So pick a lane, Rafe. Either you fucking pay me like you always wanted and look at me like I'm nothing more than your sex toy of the week, or you stop this shit and let me make my own decisions!” you scream, and he steps away, pacing the space between the living room and kitchen. 

   “I don't fucking care about the money,” he shakes his head, glancing at you before he continues walking. 

   “Then what do you care about, Rafe?” you scoff. 

   “You're a real bitch, you know. Maybe I should've let one of the others fuck you. Maybe you'd be acting less entitled then,” he spits, and you laugh. 

   “We had a contract. I'm honoring the contract!” 

   “Were you? When you let me do things that are strictly non-negotiable and “never to happen”?” He glares, and you don't know what to say. 

   You opt for the easy way out. “I hate you,” you tell him, getting up to head for the front door, but he catches your arm and pulls you back into his arms. 

   “I’m allowed to hate you too, then,” he hushes before his lips hit yours, and you can't help but kiss him back. His lips are so soft, and he tastes and smells like heaven. 

   Rafe walks you into the bedroom, laying you down on the bed as he continues to kiss you, his hands bunching up the dress you're wearing and pulling your slip down. 

   “Tell me to stop,” he says against your lips, but you can't. You're too overwhelmed with how much you need him inside you at that moment. Your fingers are clumsily opening his belt and jeans, putting your hand into his boxer briefs and pumping him while he tries to wiggle his pants off and pull the boxers down completely. 

   And when he sinks into you, you don't even care about the pain, the sting every thrust causes because having him just for you is worth it. 

   “No one but me- Mine-” Rafe pants as he picks up his pace, fucking you faster and rougher until you soak his cock, but he continues, and you don't know how he does it. 

“Just you,” you pant searching for his lips until he grants you a sloppy kiss, groaning into you as he finishes, painting your clenching walls white. 

   Rafe is breathing heavily as he lies by your side, your head turned to look at him while he's staring at the ceiling. 

   “I don't want you to leave,” he says, still not looking at you. 

   “Why not?” you ask, propping your head up on your head as you fully turn to look at him. 

   “You don't like to get bossed around,” he smiles. “The girls that want me don't give two fucks about what I tell them to do, they just do it and hope to get picked.” 

   “You got low standards,” you chuckle. 

   “And yours are high up in the sky,” he replies, looking at you, and if you didn't know better you’d say he looks almost in love. 

   “I wouldn't be here if they weren't.” 

   “The thought of someone else- Call me a selfish, egotistical asshole, all right,” he huffs a laugh. 

   “I have college, I can't stay forever,” you whisper, reaching out to hold onto his cheek. “It's not like you would actually want me that close, either.” 

   “I'm sorry for this morning, okay? I should've just let you sleep there, while I take the couch,” he sighs. 

   “Why don't you wanna sleep next to me?” you ask softly, and he shakes his head. 

   “The last time I slept in a bed with anyone next to me, my mom was still with us. I don't- Don't analyze me,” he furrows his brows at you when he sees your wide eyes. 

   “I see, but I don't like that. I feel like I'm the unwelcomed mistress when you do that,” you tell him, and he nods. 

   “We can try it, but I can't promise anything.” 

   You spend the rest of the day cuddling in bed and fucking, although you're sore and should probably rest, and when he falls asleep by your side you tell yourself to not be mad at him when you wake up alone again. 

   The next day he spends with you, going shopping and eating yourselves through the city basically, and for once you aren't reminded that the time you have is limited and about how all of it came to be. At dinner, you refuse to sit so far away from him, feeling lonely with that much table in between you. And when Rafe kisses you, the help leaves the room almost instantly, which comes to your advantage because you hadn't expected to be his dinner that day. 

   Rafe wipes his plate off the table and lays you down on the silky table cloth, his head buried between your legs, licking long stripes up your cunt and gently biting your clit. You're moaning so loud you fear your voice will be gone the next day, but you actually don't mind it. His skilled tongue is pulling one orgasm from you after the other. 

   “So fucking delicious,” Rafe pants, wiping his face clean on the table cloth before picking you up and carrying you upstairs. 

   Maybe you would call it a Honeymoon Phase, but you're still unsure if you're actually falling for him or not. But that is made pretty clear when he makes you straddle him and fuck yourself on his thick cock. 

   “I'll teach you,” he breathes into a kiss, his hands gripping your hips and moving them up and down his impressive length. 

   “That's deep,” you gulp, but keep moving anyway, too drunk on how good he feels inside of you. 

   “You're being such a good girl for me, y/n. My perfect little slut,” he praises you, and you take it to push him to lie down. With your hands perched on his chest, you start bouncing on him, fast and heavy, bringing yourself to an orgasm within minutes. 

   But instead of finishing and pulling out, Rafe pulls out and pushes you to lie down, while he positions himself behind you, sliding into your soppy core while lying down on top of you so you can't move anymore. His thrusts grow sloppy soon after, and he groans, biting your shoulder while coming. 

   “Y/n, please let me be the only one to fuck you,” he begs as you lie there, and you are too fucked out to actually think clearly.

   “Always. Me too. Me too, please,” you murmur into his pillows. 

   “No one but you, ever again. I promise,” Rafe whispers, kissing the bite mark on your shoulder and hearing your soft approving hum. 

   When you wake up, he's still by your side, and you're still in his room. You can't be sure if the deal you had made the night before was legit or not, but you want it to be. 

   You decide to get up and clean yourself a bit, but before you can step away, he grasps for your hand, holding onto your wrist. 

   “Don't leave me, love,” Rafe sounds sexy, half asleep, and you crawl back into bed. “Don't ever leave.” 

   “I won't,” you promise, because even though you shouldn't, you know he'll find a way to make it work if he really wants it. And you would rather give up law than sex with Rafe Cameron.

please don't copy and/or post my work onto other platforms! ~e©ho

taglist: @redhead1180 @spideysimpossiblegirl @drwstarkeyy @princessmaybank @kys4-20 @immyowndefender @julczimozart @hoe4sunarin @m2m2m2 @mochimms @itsme-again @maybankslover @th3eternalersi @because-i-like-toxic-men @rafeeekam @carolinaxvz

[at0michips]

home sweet home — josh o'connor

summary: your long distance boyfriend decides to move all the way to NYC so you can live together, but with all the work he has to deal before he can enjoy it, you decide to take care of the move. now after long weeks apart he's back.

Today was the day, where Josh was finally going to come back home after months of doing press all over the world and the country. Well, not exactly home. Yes it was his house, and yes he was going to live there with you after a year and a half of being together, but with two new movies out and a whole press tour that included being only a few hours away from you and your new house in New York, to being literally across the world, the poor english man didn't had the time to be there to even unpack the things he brought from England or the ones you bought together.

However, you promised yourself this wouldn't be a problem at all. He did what he had to do and you would be there no matter what, of course it was kind of energy draining to deal with your work and moving in but you made it! You would finally be able to be with him by the end of the day, and the dinners wouldn't have to be over facetime anymore with a different time zone. Not complaining tho, you were forever grateful for when your boss sent you to England to cover an event were you met you now boyfriend.

You were so excited that you could also feel a little anxious too, making sure that even after everything was on it's place for two weeks now, there wasn't anything wrong. Not like Josh would get in the apartment and start pointing out the things you could have done better, he wasn't that kind of person, and he also knew better that going against you but you just couldn't help but want everything to be perfect for your first night together in your own house to be just perfect.

And apparently everything was just fine, his favorite meal was in the oven and shouldn't be ready for at least the next 30 minutes, meaning you had plenty of time to do nothing. With that in mind, the wine bottle on the countertop that you bought on your way from work seemed perfect to ease your nerves while you waited for Josh to come home, wich by your counts could happen anytime now.

Time actually flew after your second glass of wine and sometime (you have no idea of how much) scrolling through tiktok that you were actually surprised when you heard the doorbell, and with that you looked like an anxious kid running barefoot to open the door to see the person you were craving to see for weeks now. The first thing you do is throw yourself at him who's more than ready to catch with his strong arms and lift you up just a little bit of the ground.

"Oh my god I missed you so so much!" you said before attacking his cheek with kisses. You could finally hear his pretty laugh close to your ear and the fact that it wasn't through a phone call was so relieving.

"It seemed like forever without you luv." he said putting you back on the ground with a stupid smile on his face, while he admired you for a moment before connecting your lips together in a quick kiss. The man ahead of you looked exhausted yet so happy to finally meet you again for what felt like ages.

After realizing you guys were still outside of your house, you take his hand and pull him inside, excited for finally having him to yourself.

"You're making dinner? It smells amazing in here" he said with an excited tone as he entered your now oficially shared house and locked the door behind him.

"Guess what it-" but before you could finish your sentence he was already taking a look in the oven "Josh no! Why are you like this?" you pouted.

"Aw babe, I can't believe you did my favorite." he said turning back to face you and failed to hold a laugh after looking at your frown "M'sorry for antecipating the surprise luv, i'm starving!" he took your cheeks into his hands and lowered himself a bit to give a peck into your lips, that immediately made you melt into the man's hands.

"Okay, but next time wait until I finish my line. Now go wash your hands." you said with the demanding tone Josh missed for what felt like an eternity.

The male did as you told him so and went to the bathroom to wash up as you took the dish into the dining room, serving each of your plates with the food you made and your glasses with the already opened wine. Everything was ready when he got back, and you guys proceeded with the dinner, sharing stories from each other works, giving updates about friends, family and silly things from your routines.

It seemed like you guys were never apart from each other, like this was just another regular night of your little life together and not the first from what you hoped would be forever. After dinner, the man decided that the dishes could wait until tomorrow, he didn't wanted you to work more. He knew your weeks has been exhausting, having to wake up early, do your job and then take care of the small renovation in the house and the move. And he knew that today even after the apartment was ready, you haven't stopped, going to work and then making him dinner after arriving.

What has he done to deserve someone so caring? That thought didn't left his mind for one second the whole night, and he was determined to make you feel the same, at least a little bit. With that in mind, you guys went straight to the bathroom of your suite to take a shower together.

It was such a sweet and intimate moment. Of course it wasn't the first time you guys took a shower together, but there was something about his gentle hands on your shoulders and all the way down your back while he kept up a small conversation about the little things he noticed around the apartment that just made this moment so special for you. In your eyes this was real intimacy, being able to be naked and so close and yet don't feel the need to be having sex with each other. Of course you were missing him in bed, god how many times you had to please yourself while he was away, but for now that moment felt like it was enough for both of you.

After the bath, you put on your pajamas and were now on your shared bed with some of the gifts the british man bought you during the press tour. Most of them came with a "oh this one reminded me of you" wich just melted your heart.

"I figured this one we could use together, what do you think?" he said holding a face mask next to his face. You laughed, like how cute could a 34 year old man be?

"Of course my lord." you said with a fake british accent and started tying up your hair while he rolled his eyes at your mocking and proceeded to open the packages.

"And now what?" he asked as you tidy up the mask on his face.

"Well, the package says we have to wait 10 minutes and then take it off." you get up and start to put away your gifts and hear the body of your boyfriend dramatically fall back in your bed, to wich you return with your everyday lotion in hands.

"Let me take care of it for you." he sits up and basically takes the lotion out of your hands and motioned for you to lay down "Relax for a bit, you must be tired...".

He's right, luckily is a friday night and you won't have to worry about waking up early in the morning for the next two days. So you do as he said and lay your head on the pillow and just enjoy the sensation of his long fingers coated with your lotion massaging your feet, slowly working his way up your leg. You smile at the sight of Josh caressing your skin so carefully, his face so concentrated but it was impossible to take him seriously with that mask on that you closed your eyes, choosing to just enjoy your broyfriend's affection.

It must have been the wine, the calming sensation on your face and the loving touch of your boyfriend, but after your eyes closed it only took five minutes for you to doze off. Josh laughed a bit when he realized that, he gently left your feet in the bed while he stood up to put away your lotion and turn off the lights, coming back to carefully take the mask off of your face, taking his own next.

The man stretched himself before laying by your side and pulling the covers up both of you. He was so tired of the long flight, but so grateful for you to be there, always caring so much for him, the thought of going back to his house in England was boring, but after getting to be with you tonight it sounded even worse, it would be sad. There wouldn't be nobody to receive him by the door, or a warm dinner for him to eat, or someone for him to share how exciting it was to be all over the world and have his work recognized by millions of people.

You shifted in your sleep finding your way to his chest and he could swear that this was the moment his heart melted. It wasn't only today, he had noticed your effort all around the house, how you made sure all his favorite stuff had a visible place so it could be exposed or put to use. He wrapped his arms around you and closed his eyes, slowly giving in to sleep with a warm feeling in his chest. He was finally at home.

[transmascaraa]

hi! guess who's returned after finally graduating :)

can i request a drabble where our bsf (lyney/wanderer/gaming) goes to prom with us + slow dances with us? maybe a little confession too..

i sincerely apologize if you've already done a fic like this already! i haven't opened tumblr for a while now—

— 🧷anon (p.s. how are you :0?)

multiple characters headcannons!

prom confession.

characters: lyney, gaming, wanderer, xiao x gn!reader

author's note: added xiao js because🤷‍♂️ ANYWAYS congrats on your graduation!! mine is like the 14th of june so i still have a bit left but yeah! i've been alright these last few days i guess, nothing special going on really lol i hope you've been well too :p also the only SIMILAR thing i did was this with gaming, but it isn't exactly like what i'm gonna write now lmao so i hope you enjoy these hcs^^

☆ Lyney

-lyney, as your bsf, is like a really trustworthy and loyal one, PLUS interesting af

-and as you HAD to have a dance partner at prom, you chose him because he was the only safe option, really.

-you asked him if he wanted to dance with you and he was a bit surprised at first but agreed after a bit. SO the music started, and you started dancing together.

-y'know, that waltz dance pose.

-and it was peaceful enough for lyney to be honest with you about something.

-he didn't care about your answer anymore, he just had to get it off his chest

-no more "magician lyney", no more "fatuus lyney".

-just "lyney".

-so when there was a pause in the music, he pulled you closer and whispered in your ear:

-"want to try and be lovers?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

✷ Gaming

-like any time, any day.

-he was also a very good bsf, definitely always something interesting to hear from him

-AND it's entertaining to spend time with him in the first place lol

-so being that close, you decided to dance together for prom since neither of you had another choice.

-and he put one of his hands on your waist, and the other intertwined with yours, as you started dancing together.

-peaceful as well.

-adoring each others presence in the moment.

-sharing a few compliments here and there, making eachother giggle and smile and blush

-when nobody was looking, and nobody could hear either of you—

-"i love you." you both said at the same time.

-it was awkward, but it worked out just fine^^

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

✧ Wanderer

-uh kinda difficult to become friends at first lmfao

-but you definitely manage to do it after a while and even become bsfs

-and like originally he wanted to go to prom alone

-but he felt bad for you just standing in the corner while everyone else danced with others so he just kinda dragged you to dance

-no words exchanged, only his embarrassed face not wanting to look at you directly.

-his heart was racing and he was doing his best to not fuck up the dance

-not until you pulled him closer and smiled warmly at him.

-he was flustered, but still looking you in the eyes, despite wanting to seem unbothered and uninterested.

-you kissed him on the cheek while whispering:

-"do you want to be more than friends?" to which he embarrassedly nodded, not keeping any eye-contact with you after that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

✿ Xiao

-so uh you'd HAVE to be the one trying to become friends with him at first (but it kinda js works out even tho it's difficult since he doesn't understand mortals)

-although, with your help, he understands humans AT LEAST a BIT more than he used to.

-he went with you to prom because you had told him that you have nobody to dance with, so you decided to ask him.

-he didn't really get the concept of prom but he did it anyway.

-of course, while you were dancing with the music playing in the background, he felt a lot more open.

-so he started telling you in detail about how he felt about you. he didn't know it was love.

-he told you about how pretty/handsome/fabolous you were in his eyes, how he wished to spend all his life AND afterlife with you, how important you were to him and that he'd protect you if he had to—

-"i love you too, xiao." and he didn't know how to function properly after that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

yes

just yes i love it

it was really interesting to write ngl i had such beautiful scenarios in my head smh

| 🧷anon | @mariaace <3

[binniesbooks]

hi fayebae, imma send these before i go for my hiatus again(im not sure if you alr have smth planned for tyun n hyuka! cos i know u have a yj fic thats coming soon, so ill send these in for them)

was thinking of tyun x reader for this

uk the series “academy reincarnation”!! There was a salsa dance ep! I was thinking that reader decided to sign up to the salsa academy where tyun is one of the instructors?/student! reader wanted to learn salsa for the longest time but has always been afraid to as one would usually need to dance in pairs. afraid of having any physical contact with any stranger(due to a trauma she formed from a relationship), even tho it was difficult, reader eventually let down her walls with tyun as the many practice sessions go by, she finds herself now looking forward to salsa practices as thats the only time she can see tyun! And she craves his touch. During one of the practices, they got so lost in the dance that their faces ended up really close to each other! Tension arises(she wants him, he wants her, dare i say more 🤭smut of course!) [didnt wanna write too much to allow ur creative freedom!!]

i hope this is good gah(just thought i should send smth in for the other members too hehe, pls dont put aside ur wip again!! Do this after ure done w ur yj one gah) love u my soobie fav boobie💗

TENDER TOUCH

TH 002 .F22 2024

wc 5.3k

pairings gentle!Taehyun x abused!reader

warnings physical and sexual abuse, traumatic experience, traumatized reader, protected sex, abusive ex-boyfriend (idk what else did I miss)

faye's note *insert: Taehyun's 어디 있지 (where am I) in boba😳* as promised, here's my second fic for the day! this is my first Taehyun fic and I'm fucking obsessed that it got up to 5.3k words, wth. Anyways, @inkigayocamman I know you requested a Tae fic, but here's another one for u to enjoy I guess while I'm still working on it. 🙂‍↕️ I hope you like this too! And ofc, to my one and only Beomgyu's kitten, I love your brain, it's so sexy omfg. I'm totally sat. Plus yeah, the yj fic is still on the line. 🤣 Anyway, I did a few research(again) for this fic, so I hope it turned out good, fingers crossed!

Edit: Thanks for proofreading the whole ass fic @babymochibeargyu I'm dead now. 😭😂 luv uuuu 😖💓

"Learn how to dance Salsa, we offer multiple dance forms for beginners to professionals. Come join us..." You mumbled reading the flyer your friend handed you.

"Jia, you know I can't do anything like this anymore." You sighed as you handed her back the flyer.

"I know, I know, it's because of your trauma, right? But maybe this is the way that can only help you overcome that trauma," She started, "I'm worried about you taking this class but I'm more worried about you carrying that trauma all throughout your life." Jia gently holds your hand, still careful not to scare you with the skin contact.

You're lost in your thought for a while thinking if you can really let go of your trauma after all this time. It's been so long since you haven't engaged in any relationship after your last one.

"I-I'll think about it." You sighed, you really wanted to be free but you just didn't know how to start. "Please do, I really wanted to help you." Jia's eyes are full of worry, sadness and guilt. Because it's been so long yet she can't do anything to help.

You've always been wanting to learn how to dance Salsa. It's like your little dream ever since, however, your boyfriend from your last relationship did not even want you to be touched nor be grazed by any man's skin. You insisted you could just pair with a girl but he threatened you to hurt anyone who will be around you if you kept on insisting to register for the dance class. You ended up not registering for the class and burying your little dance dream into the depths of your heart.

The following week, you found yourself standing in front of the dance academy building. Breathing slowly, thinking deeply whether you really want to do it or not. You were clutching on the flyer tightly. Your knees fell weak as you stumbled down, retreating all the way to the confinement of your apartment to hide from the world.

It took so much courage for you to do this. Especially when you ended up trying once again a week later. You're standing in the front of the building, staring at the swaying banner of the academy with a "SALSA DANCE ACADEMY" written on it.

You softly knocked on the door before opening it. "Hi! Come in! How may I help you?" You were greeted with s young lady, clad in a salsa dance costume. She looks bright and bubbly.

"I.. Uhm.. wanted to register for the class." You meekly answered as you slid down on the chair. "May I know your name?" The lady picked up the pen on the table and grabbed a file.

"Y/n...y/n s/n." You silently answered.

"What class would you like to be included in?" The lady's smile never faltered. Her bright aura makes you feel comfortable for a bit. "What do you offer?" You asked back.

"Well, we have group sessions and we also have one-on-one lessons," you nodded at her, signaling her to keep going. "In group sessions, there will be 15 pairs -- 30 individuals in a class, plus the 2 dance instructors," you felt pressured with just the thought of being included in the group. "In the one-on-one class, we will find you a pair if you still have none, or you can bring one, and then also a pair of instructors," she explained.

"I'll take the latter."

"Please sign here and we'll wait for another one to sign up." She smiled again at you. You were thinking of bringing your friend to the class.

"By any chance, can I bring a girl for the one-on-one class?" Her expression suddenly turned sad, "I'm afraid we are only taking a man and a woman as a pair for the one-on-one class. Usually, the pairs who sign up for the one-on-one class end up acquiring advanced skills than those who are in the group."

You thought of backing out once again but you shook your head to clear your mind. You're already here, you're already a step closer to the most awaited time of your life: to let go of your trauma.

"We'll call you once we receive another sign-up for a one-on-one class. Thank you for dropping by." The lady waved her hand as you stepped outside.

You shrunk to the corner of the door, people are looking at you but you're too occupied to even give a damn.

It's been a week. You didn't know how to explain how you felt. Half of you felt happy that you hadn't received a call yet, because that would only means you didn't have to do it anymore and there wouldn't be anymore skin contact for you to trigger your trauma. However, the other half of you felt disappointed. You would have been lying if you said that you didn't get your hopes up, thinking that this would be the way to be finally free from your trauma.

"Still haven't received a call?" Your friend placed the pizza she brought on your coffee table. Today was the day she would usually pay you a visit to your apartment. She started doing this from 2 years ago, when you and your ex-boyfriend finally broke up.

You hummed in response as you dug out the box of pizza. Nevertheless, you don't want to bring your thoughts about the dance academy again.

A couple of minutes passed when your phone rang, causing both your heads to look towards your phone

"Hello?"

"Hi! Can I talk to Ms. Y/n s/n?" The voice over the line spoke brightly.

"Y/n speaking." You just answered back, looking at your friend who's anticipating a piece of good news.

"We just want to inform you that someone already signed up for the one-on-one class as your pair. The class will start this Monday, are you fine with it?" Your friend sighed in relief as soon as she heard it.

"O-okay. Sure." You felt a rush of anxiety travel throughout your body, as your fingers trembled hanging up the call.

"Hey, it's okay." Your friend wrapped the thick blanket around your shoulders before hugging you. Afraid that she might trigger your trauma. "You'll be fine." She tries to calm you down by rubbing your back.

2 days passed by quickly. Enough to make you coil up in bed instead of getting up. Your phone vibrates from an incoming message.

Dearest Jia: Take care later, okay? I know you can do it. I won't be able to go because of work, so I hope you understand:< but I'll pick you up when you're done! <3

You: I don't feel like going.

Dearest Jia: Noooo! You've come this far. You should go, I know you can do this!

You: Fine, I'll text you when I'm done with the class.

You tossed your phone on the bed as you grunt into your pillow. You're just glad your dance class starts at 3 in the afternoon. You still had a lot of time to prepare your body and mind.

Quarter to 3, you're already in front of the building, a few people going in at the same time. Probably for the group session. You wanted to go home but the lady called you out.

"Y/n! Please come in. I'll accompany you to the assigned room. I'm Daeun, btw." She extended her hand to you but you froze. You're too afraid. But someone else caught Daeun's hand. "I'm Taehyun, the one who signed up for the pair." A tall guy appeared on your side, shaking her hand. "I-i'm y/n." You meekly introduced yourself without touching any of them. The lady looked confused at first but she shrugged it off.

"Okay, I'll leave you two here, Mr. and Mrs. Hwang are inside already."

Taehyun pushed the door open, you were both greeted with a polished wooden floor and mirror walls in the wide room. Two people were sitting in the corner. They must be your instructors.

"Please come in!" The lady waved at the both of you.

"Do you know each other?" The man asked which the both of you only answered by shaking your head.

"I think we should start our class with an introduction. Don't you think?" The lady nodded.

"I'm Mr. Hwang and this is Mrs. Hwang. She's my wife and we mainly teach one-on-one classes. You are?" They turn their gaze to Taehyun.

"My name is Kang Taehyun. I also dance but not in this genre. So I wanted to learn this." They then looked at you.

"I... I am y/n. I signed up for the class t-to overcome my t-rauma." Your words are slurred, and your reason made your instructors gasp. "I-I used to be in a r-relationship. And t-they're the reason why I can't e-even touch people or let other p- people t-touch me." You bit your lip as you look up at them.

"Honey, but I'm afraid this dance requires a lot of holding and touching, what should we do?" Mrs. Hwang clasped both of her hands on her mouth as she turned a bit emotional.

"By any chance, can you hold someone when there's a barrier between them? Like, there is no direct skin-to-skin contact?" Taehyun spoke up, you nodded lightly at him. "It's been two years so I think I can tolerate it to an extent."

"Then I think we're good Mrs. Hwang. I'm thinking of using a glove or something. If that's what makes her comfortable. I don't mind at all." Taehyun remarked.

Taehyun ended up wearing gloves for your dance class. And as much as possible, he's avoiding any of your exposed body parts. He's also lightly touching you that you feel as though it's just air grazing your body.

So far so good, the 3-hour class ended up okay. Jia picked you up 30 minutes later after you texted her that you were done.

Your dance class went well the next day. And the day after that. And the following days after that. Days became weeks, weeks became months. It's all going well, with Taehyun's careful assistance over you.

Today was the day you decided to step further to your goal.

"Taehyun, I think we can now stop using the gloves. We've been dancing for a month now and I hate it whenever I think about the gloves. It feels like I'm being disgusted by you or something." You stated to Taehyun once the two of you were on a quick break. Within one month, you grew closer to Taehyun. The quick breaks were your time to tell stories to each other.

"Are you sure? You're not making me feel like any of that, by the way. But are you sure you can do it now?" His eyes seek yours. You simply nodded as you removed your jacket leaving you with your t-shirt on.

"Are you two, okay? Shall we continue?" Your dance instructor asked, checking on you, as you and Taehyun stood up. Taehyun discarded the gloves he was using on top of his bag as he folded his long-sleeved t-shirt up to his elbow.

You started off well. Taehyun holding your hand as gently as he could as usual. Letting you turn around with some quick footwork. It was all good actually, until he needed to lean in, holding your waist and your thigh. One more turn, his arms and fingers graze through your arms. His delicate fingers holding your waist once again. A quick turnaround. A step faster. A more closer proximity.

"You fucker! Come back here! I know what you did!"

"S-stop! We're already over Han!" You squealed as you blocked the door with your body.

"You're fucking dead meat when this door opens!"

Your tears wouldn't stop flowing from your cheeks as you kept your body pressed on the banging door. Han has been your boyfriend for 9 months now. At first, he was so good to you, treating you like the princess you deserved to be. But it was too good to be true that you started to feel it was wrong. Just 2 months ago he started hurting you physically and abusing you sexually. He was too obsessed with you too that he sometimes he would start locking you up in your apartment. Even your requests got declined. At first, you let it pass as you thought it was normal. But you started earning bruises and wounds. You barely ate, barely drank, you even barely slept. You would often get fevers too. The slightest noise would make your soul jump out and the slightest movement would make you flinch.

Jia, your friend, was the one who advised you to report him. So you did, that was why he was here banging at your door.

Han's voice can no longer be heard, hence you decided to quickly hide in your closet, as you dug out your spare phone you had hidden to contact your friend.

You quickly called Jia, telling her to call the police or something but you were cut off when the door bursts open. Han was holding a gun and laughing hysterically.

"Fuck you, you bitch! You're really dead!" You quickly covered your mouth.

"Come out, kitten. Come out from wherever the fuck you're hiding!" His voice echoed through the room drowning your quiet sobs.

That's when he forcefully opened the closet you're hiding. "Ohhh, you look so scared kitten, why?" He cooed at you as his lips stretched to form a mocking grin. "Move to the bed!" You shook your head. "Fucking move to the bed!" He fired a warning shot at the mirror, crashing it. You yelped at the noise. With your trembling body, you quickly scrambled your way to the bed covering your bruised-up body.

"Strip." He commanded as he pointed the gun at you. With no choice left, and your life at stake, you did what he ordered.

He crashed his lips on yours harshly. When he noticed you didn't kiss him back, he slapped you. Blood flowed through your lips as you choked on your sobs. With the gun still pointed at your head, he started harassing you again. His hand left a bruised mark on your neck as he tightly squeezes it. You could almost see the white light as your weak body just let him do anything. There was no use thrashing around as if you had accepted your dying fate.

"Freeze!" Was the only thing you heard before everything around you went black.

You opened your eyes inside the hospital, pulled every apparatus attached to your body and started screaming. It made Jia scream out and call for a doctor. They couldn't calm you down so they needed to give you a shot for temporary sleep.

Everything came swirling back to you. Pushing Taehyun away, causing your body to crash on the wooden floor. "Shit!" Taehyun cursed under his breath as he hurriedly pushed back his sleeves and wore the gloves again, picking up your jacket at the same time, before coming back to you. Your instructors let out a shock gasp as they also rushed over to you.

"Please grab a blanket or any thick clothing!" Taehyun shouts as he tries to ease you by covering your shoulder with your jacket.

Mr. Hwang passed Taehyun his padded jacket he always brought with him. Taehyun carefully wrapped the thick jacket around your body. He holds your face as he tries to soothe you.

"Y/n, look at me, please look at me." Sweat started to form on his forehead as tears freely flowed down your cheeks. "Please, look at me, and breathe slowly. Breathe slowly. Inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale." Taehyun guided your breathing as his glove-cladded hands rubbed your cheeks.

Mrs. Hwang was panicking but Mr. Hwang tried to calm her down before he went out to grab a glass of water.

Your heartbeat slowed down for at least a bit. Taehyun guiding you helped somehow as you slowly calmed down. Taehyun got the water from Mr. Hwang and held it in front of you as he let you sip on the water slowly.

"Are you feeling okay now?" Taehyun tucked your sweaty hair behind your ears. His eyes were full of worry. "Do you wanna go home and rest?" He's still carefully rubbing your shoulder. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have removed the gloves. That was too risky." Taehyun mumbled as he hesitated to hold your hand.

That same afternoon, he called your friend over. He introduced himself and explained the situation. He let your friend take you home as he bid you two goodbye. You're lucky it was Friday at that time so you don't have to worry about waking up the next morning to go to your dance class. For the next two days, you spent it caving in your room. It helped you calm down.

Monday. You opened the door. You laughed at the scene in front of your eyes.

"What's that?" You chuckled as you placed your bag on the corner. Taehyun looks at himself in the mirror. He's totally covered. He's wearing a thicker glove and a padded jacket. His usual dress pants are now sweats. He's even wearing a mask. He scratched the back of his head.

"Pft. That's too much. Don't worry I'm fine now. Thank you by the way." You smiled at him.

"Are you sure? Because that scared me. I don't know what to do." He removed his jacket along with the face mask and the thick gloves.

"Mhm, I'm sure." You assured him.

"Okay then. We'll try again. Slowly this time." His eyes are full of concern as he looks at you. You smiled at him as you accepted his hand.

For another month, Taehyun tried to connect with you. Stopping whenever needed. Wearing the things he needs to wear whenever he can sense your anxiety rising. For once, you realize how he gently holds you. How he's always careful with you, treating you like a fragile glass that would easily break if you weren't handled correctly. One month passed without much problem. If anything, you're actually growing accustomed to it.

For some reason, you learned to feel comfortable with Taehyun's touch. The graze of his skin, his fingers, and his touch never terrified you anymore, and his existence no longer made you panic.

Now, he's solely the reason why you're still attending your dance class. You're slowly putting your trust in him. You're slowly putting your walls down. He can now hold your hand without fear. He can now dance without thinking that you would startled. He slowly introduced you to the steps that requires your body to be closer. Teaching you how the steps are supposed to be done. You're no longer panicking. Even when your face is just only few inches from him, you were actually smiling at each other. You no longer feared his touch. If anything, he's only leaving you all tingly with his warm skin.

You could feel the warmth radiating off his body. Whenever you leaned on his chest, it made your heart flutter. His breath on your shoulder, your neck, any part of your body makes the knot in your stomach twist tighter.

You're slowly craving for his touch. For how he cares for you, for how he tends to you. Whenever you're home, he keeps popping into your head. How his sharky smile appears whenever he's happy. The small noises he made. His cat-like attitude. He's the perfect example of hot, sexy and cute.

Every last week of the month, you would have all the time to yourselves to gather all your skills acquired. Because every once a month, you had to show what you have learnt in class. This now left the two of you alone in the dance studio. Perfecting every step and move you needed to show on evaluation day.

Taehyun's lingering touches left you all tingly. His deep voice sent a shiver down your spine. His breath alone makes your mind go in a twist.

"One step back, two steps to the front... One turn and... Lean you down." He's matching his words on every beat of the step. You thought it only happens in a fantasy world. But it was like the world stopped when his eyes were fixed on yours. His steady breath makes you hold yours. His eyes traveled down to your lips as he gulped. He mumbles a soft "You're pretty," before pulling you back to stand on both your feet.

His hands are both on your face as he slowly backs you to the mirror. His breath is unsteady and warm. The moment he got you pressed on the mirror, he leaned his forehead on yours as he closed his eyes.

"You're really pretty. So pretty I'm afraid I can't control myself." He whispered. Your hands were on his chest, you felt how his heart was thumping so hard.

"S-should we head out early?" You whispered, your hot puffs of breath touching his lips got him reeling as he cursed under his breath.

He quickly pulls away, holds your hand and grabs both of your bags. Both heading outside to his car. "Tell your friend I'm taking you home instead." The air in the car throughout the drive was so thick. His hands were gripping on the wheels, tapping impatiently when the road slowed down.

"Calm down, Tae, I'm not going anywhere." You chuckled as you placed your hand above his when it was resting on the gear shift. He throws a quick glance at you. He bit his lip as a flush crept up on his cheeks.

The drive was short, but Taehyun's action made it look like it was not. He hurriedly got out of his car, running over to your side to open the door for you as he held your hand. His jittery steps were heavy as you both made your way to his humble home.

"Come in." He nervously spoke as he placed his shoe on the rack, switching the light on in the process.

"D-do you want a drink or something?" He was almost running towards the kitchen.

You flop on his couch, making yourself comfortable at some point. "Come here, instead," you chuckled, "You're so anxious for no reason, Taehyun." He sat down beside you, wiping his sweaty palms on his dress pants as he sighed. You scoot over, holding his face, lips just a few inches apart.

"Wait," he pushed you a bit, "a-are you sure about this?" You nodded and smiled at him. "G-give me a minute." He rummaged through his back pocket pulling a handkerchief. You looked at him confused.

He unfolded the handkerchief and gently placed the thin fabric on your lips before crashing his lips on yours. He holds your nape as he climbs up on the couch. He slowly laid you down. Lips unmoving, yet it feels so hot. His lips were just merely pressed on yours with the fabric separating both of your soft skin.

He pulled away, kissing your forehead. "I'm sorry." He whispered as if he was the one who did you wrong. You gently pull the handkerchief away as you tangle your fingers in his hair. Taehyun never failed to take care of you in the most gentle way possible. He's not thinking of his pleasure at this point. He's thinking about you. To the point that he even thought of putting a piece of cloth between your lips just to be able to kiss you.

You wanted to cry at how he's taking care of you. Your eyes welled up with tears as you pulled him back. "I'm good now Tae, thank you for taking care of me. There's no need for the hanky." You whispered before your tears rolled down your cheeks as you kissed him, bare.

He's a gentleman. He's too good to be true. But you let your walls fall down and let him enter. You let him protect you instead. But his hungry kiss spoke thousands of emotions. His kisses travel down to your neck.

"Taehyun..." You whimpered as you gripped his hair.

"A bit more... Just a bit more..." He started sucking and biting your neck and shoulder, leaving splotchy red marks. He pulls away for a while, enough time to tug your shirt off your body.

His fingers slowly traced every scar you have on your body. The marks on your chest from the bottle Han once threw at you. The cigarette burns on your stomach. He also pulled down your skirts only to see stitches from your thighs. You got this when Han pushed you down the stairs. His finger draws back to your lips. The scar from the cut when he slapped you is still visible.

You covered your face out of embarrassment. You no longer look pretty with your all bruised-up body. "We can't do this here." Taehyun got up and carried you all the way to his bedroom. He laid you carefully as ever in his bedroom.

The bed dips down at his weight as he kneels between your legs. His head dips down to kiss every scar you have on your delicate body as if he's kissing your trauma away. He took his precious time. Not wanting to scare or startle you at any point. His actions are being done with all tenderness.

"Do you still want me to continue?" He asks when he hovers above your body, his elbows on both sides of your head. "I want you Taehyun, please do..." You whined biting your lip. "How can I say no when you say it like that, sweetheart." He sighed leaning his forehead on yours again. Your arms crawled under his shirt, feeling his toned body hiding beneath the soft cotton shirt he was wearing. "C-can you take it off? I feel so exposed." You mumbled as you tugged his shirt. "Ah, shit, I'm sorry." He quickly backed up to discard his shirt on the floor.

You stared at him when he was all fours above you. His body is totally toned. You can clearly see the firm muscles on his arms. His buff chest and his perfectly defined abs. "Touch me. I won't stop you. Touch me so you won't feel embarrassed anymore. Touch me so you won't feel as if I'm taking advantage of you. Touch me so you won't feel scared." He grabbed one of your hands and placed it on his chest, slowly dragging it down to his abs.

When he lets go of your hands, you continue to drag them down to the waistband of his dress pants. "C-continue..." His eyes were shut close, his lips trapped between his teeth. You can clearly see his abs tightening as he clenches with the graze of your finger on his waist. He gulps when you hook your finger inside. You unhooked the clip that's binding his pants and pulled the zipper down. His breathing hitched at the lingering touches you're leaving on his lower body.

You gently stroked him as you looked for his eyes. His lips were swollen at how he was biting it. "You won't let it out?" You tried taunting him. "Fuck..." He lets go of his long-held breath, hissing through his teeth. "Y-you're making me crazy, sweetheart... You're totally making me crazy..." He huffed as he tucked your hair behind your ear.

"Condom?" You asked. He reached into the small drawer just beside your head, pulling out a packet of condoms. "D'you wanna p-put it in f'me?" His words were short, and he was catching his breath. You gently rubbed the head of his cock as you rip the packet with your teeth.

"S-sweetheart, you're... Shit... You're k-killing me." He shuddered when you pressed at his slit, his jaw clenched tightly, his hand grasping the sheets.

You slowly drag your fingers on his cock as you wrapped it with the condom. "T-take your time... I w-won't do anything to hurt you or...ahh... or m-make you s-scared of me." He's struggling to hold back but he's doing his best. As soon as you were done, you tangled your fingers on his again, pulling him for a kiss. A kiss full of care. Gentle. Delicate. Sweet.

He pulls away, caressing your face once more. He pulls your underwear in one swift motion as he lines himself up on you, slowly pushing in. He continuously soothes you by rubbing his thumb on your cheek. "Don't be scared, hm? I'm here. It's just me..." He keeps on mumbling, repeating the same phrase as you nod back at him.

Once he has bottomed out inside you, he stays still as he continues to plant soft kisses on your face. You were tearing up not because of the trauma anymore, but because of the love and care he's showing you.

He unhooked your bra as he gently groped your breast, his fingers flicked on your nipple as he suck on the other. "Mmm..." You whimpered underneath his big body squirming at how his tongue danced on your nipple. He didn't take long, afraid that he might hurt or trigger your trauma.

"C-can I move now? I might end up c-cumming now. You've been clenching f-for some time..." He muttered under his breath. You nodded and covered your face again.

He pulled both of your hands and intertwined your fingers with him above your head. "Please don't cover your face. You're beautiful. You're still pretty even with your scars. You're still gorgeous even with your fear and trauma. Please... Just let me take care of you. I know it'll be hard for you, but I promise. I promise to hold you dearly and cherish you." His eyes were looking for answers.

"Taehyun... Please... Please take care of me from now on. Please hold me when I feel scared... Make me feel loved..." Your silent weeps were drowned as he kissed your nose. "I'll be your peace, sweetheart." He wiped your tears as he slowly thrusts in you.

"I... I promise to hold you as gently as I can... But... I think I might end up g-going hard right n-now." He buried his face in the crook of your neck.

Your arms reached over his back as your nails dug and dragged over his bare back. "T-Taehyun..." You moaned out his name as you writhed in pleasure beneath him. The slow thrust becomes a little bit more sloppy. The skin slapping echoed through the solitude of his room.

"Fuck. Please forgive me if e-end up going t-too hard. But I promise to d-do my best to hold b-back." He grunted as his thrust went harder. You shook your head wanting him to go harder.

"I-i can't hurt you... I w-won't..." He steadies the way he thrusts inside you making the knot on your stomach tighten as you feel your high just around the corner.

You held him as if your life depended on him, "Taehyun... I'm close." "D-do it, sweetheart. I'm g-gonna cum any m-minute." He pressed his lips on you to drown your moans as you both came. He rubbed your waist as he soothed you before pulling out. Tying the condom and disposing it in the bin, zipping up his pants at the same time.

He bends down to kiss your forehead as he grabs a pack of wet wipes cleaning you up. He picked up his shirt and made you wear it. He finally laid beside you as he pulled you on his chest, running his fingers through your hair.

"Are you hurt anywhere?" He checks on you, to which you replied by shaking your head and a smile. "Sorry for going too hard, I did my best to hold back," he mumbled as he kissed the top of your head. "I'm okay Taehyun. Thank you so much." Your eyes finally close as his warmth embraces you. He hums while still hugging you close to him.

"Please rest now, sweetheart. When you wake up, you no longer have to suffer anymore. You're safe with me. You're finally safe with me."

@binniesbooks 2024

[webslingingslasher]

https://www.tumblr.com/webslingingslasher/743332772525031424/httpswwwtumblrcomwebslingingslasher743317088

But I feel bad for Trouble tho☹️ Before finding out, wouldn’t she feel unwanted? She already feels irrelevant due to Peter’s dumbass then afterwards guys rejects/push her away because of Peter, AGAIN. Like, can this sweet bubs get some break😭

'you tainted me.'

'i what?' peter chokes around his water, a friend claps him on the back.

'you tainted me. what's the point of being broken up? either i'm miserable with you or without you. i can't have you but since i stupidly fucked around with you, no one wants me either.'

'trouble-'

'no, really. we might as well just get back together. i'm miserable and unwanted but hey! at least you feel special!'

'that's not-'

'it fucking is. it's what you want. you want to ice out all competition so i come running back because you think you're as good as it gets. you were shitty to me until i ended it, do you think that's what i deserve? i deserve to be with someone who wouldn't even call themself my boyfriend?'

'no! i don't think you-'

'just leave me alone. please, peter. leave me alone. stop hanging around, stop putting limits on me, stop your friends from making threats, just stop. if you had even cared a fraction of what you do back then, we wouldn't be here.'

'i never meant for-'

'you did! i don't get the lying, we both know what's going on. maybe you didn't call for it, but you're not fucking stopping it. this all happened because i wanted to date you and you didn't. guess what, peter? i don't want you anymore. keep this up but it won't make me come back. you'll just push me further and further away.'

'okay.'

maybe you finally got through to him. maybe it finally clicked. maybe he realized you were done and the ship had sailed and it was too late.

maybe peter realized he could catch more bears with honey so if you wanted a guy, sure, go have him, but you'll never care about him the same way you did for peter.

or maybe if peter removed himself from your life entirely, you'd realize how much you truly miss him. It might be that one, because the next time you tried to talk to a guy and he flirted back and tried to get close to you, there was a small ping in the back of your mind asking if peter still cared. 

[kyokutsu-sama]

LOVE YOUR BLOG!!!! Can i request yami x fem!reader (or gn) fluuufffyyyy please, maybe a biiit suggestive but mainly fluff pls!

reader is drunk and we all know yami loves to drink too but readers safety is more important so he stays sober to look after her and make sure she's safe. they come home after a night out and he takes care of her. like, helping her remove the makeup and change clothes. she tries to get into his pants and as much as he wants to he says no bc she's not sober. he does make out with her tho maybe. then cuddles her to sleep! <3333

Hii!!

Oh Lord, I live to write fluff about this man so please send me more requests like this❤️😫

Yami x fem!reader

Tw: Slightly suggestive

_____________________________

This was another one of those nights when you had gone out drinking with Yami. He didn't think you couldn't keep up with him when he drank, but then you acted tough and promised to surpass your limits just to prove the opposite to him.

You were sitting at the counter, after a few mugs of beer, the captain looked at you while you seemed to be entering a euphoric state due to the alcohol.

"I know she can hold on a little longer but I better not drink anymore as I'll probably have to carry her drunk ass home." The captain thought, bringing the drink to his lips

"Yami, do you want to drink another one ?" You held the mug high but he shook his head, denying it. "Come on, just one more!" You insisted

"Nah, I'll pass."

"Okay, I'll order two, so I'll drink for you too." You smiled and winked at him

"This isn't going to end well..." He thought

And so it was, you managed to drink both in a row, which made you start to see everything around and feel your legs tremble and stagger. Even so, you still felt like he could hold on a little longer. He was really proud to see you surpassing your limits as promised but he wasn't willing to see you drink until you passed out.

"I'll order one more,"You said, raising your hand to call the bartender

"Oh no, you won't. You've had enough already." Yami held your hand and you looked at him, pouting

"But I still feel sober! Please, just one more!" You insisted but he didn't let you ask for more

"I think it's time for us to go home." He carried you, bridal style, and took you out of the establishment

He asked Finral to open the portal so you could return.

"Yami, could you take me to the bathroom?" You asked

"Do you need to take a shit?" He tease you and you laughed

"No, you idiot! I just need to remove my makeup."

"Let's go then."

He placed you on the floor and you leaned on his strong arm to hold on, since the alcohol left you without any balance.

He moistened a towel and slowly wiped it over your face, to remove it and you started laughing at him for it.

"What?" He frowned in confusion

"You know that's not how to remove makeup from your face."

"Well, the makeup is coming off your face, so I guess that's how it is." He said, continuing to rub your skin.

"You really don't understand anything about ladies." You laugh

"I'm a man Y/n, I don't put that stuff on my face, like you women do. And I ereally wonder why you wear all that thing, you're already pretty without it."

"Aww you're so cute! you're making me embarrassed now." You snuggled against his arm and he shook his head, rolling his eyes

After finishing, he carried you to the bedroom and sat you on the bed, taking off your shoes. He helped you take off your clothes and that's when things started to heat up a little. When he got up to go get the other clothes, you got up and kissed him, taking him by surprise. He put an arm around your waist to keep you stable while he responded to your sloppy kisses. That actually turn him on a little but due to the fact that you were drunk, Yami didn't want to take advantage of the situation and so he moved away from your lips.

"No, we'll have to save that for another night." He whispered next to your lips

"Please Yami, I need you so much." You whimpered, distributing kisses on his neck and running your hands all over his body. "You know I love you and especially when you take such good care of me" You grabbed his hands and roamed them over you, trying to encourage him but he, still with a lot of effort, held back. This man was on the verge of madness and if he gave in at that moment, no one would sleep in that HQ.

"Baby, my self-control is pushing back it's limits, with all of this." He chuckled

"So why don't you stop resisting and give in? It will be easier."

"No, Y/n. Not today."He whispered, kissing your forehead and hugging you. You knew he was serious when he called you by your name and not by any other nickname.

He sat you down on the bed again and dressed you in your night clothes and placed a peck on your lips.

"You really give a hard time when you drink, you know?" He joked, poking the tip of your nose and you smiled at him

"Don't tell me that a man your size can't handle a girl like me? I expected more from you..." You gave him a suggestive look and he smiled

"You better not forget those words when you're sober because I'm going to prove you wrong." He winked and laid you on the bed, laying down next to you

"And apparently my drunken condition has also left you with a hard problem down here." you put your knee in the middle of his legs but he grabbed your knee, pushing it away

"Keep those knees still, otherwise I'll put you to sleep on the floor." He threatened and you giggled

"You would never do that, would you?"

"No, if you don't give me a reason but you already gave me one." Yami put an arm around your body

"You're breaking my little heart, you know that?"

"Oh shut up." He said, patting your thigh and you laughed

"Thank you for taking care of your drunk lover. You are a good man." You thanked him, kissing his cheek

"Praising me like that makes me embarrassed, dear." Yami said, with a smirk, returning the kiss on your cheek. "But I appreciate the compliment, you're also a good woman."

Without a doubt, the captain's arms were cozy and a comfortable place that made you fall asleep right after a great cuddle session, you two share.

[jaeyunluvr]

belong to you

after a long day at work, the least thing you wanted was to hide from your ex high school boyfriend who hasn't left your mind even after years of break up. you tried all the ways possible and existing, to get rid of his drop dead gorgeous face, annoyingly astonishing smile and absolutely knee-weakening eyes, popping up in your head at random times.

it was like he existed within you. all those moments with him sunk through your existence. his laughter, the feeling of lying in his arms and being astrophiles together, running away from nothing in the middle of the night, hand in hand. it was crazy and you blamed it all on love.

but nevertheless, you moved on with your life when he chose to leave you because of the restrictions his company had when he got scouted to train to be a kpop idol. and you understood why he chose his career over you. it was obvious, making a life was important and hence you let him go.

and now, he was just two meters away from you ordering his coffee at this little cafe you were in. the stars aligned in the wrong way, in the wrong timing. you being an astrophile for all those years did nothing to you.

you tried your best to keep your cool and act like you didn't notice him but your thoughts were running at the speed of a few miles per hour, as they brushed past all your memories together.

as he finished ordering his drink, he looked around for a nice place to sit. you had your fingers crossed, you prayed desperately that he wouldn't find you. you simply were not ready to face him, because you simply just never stopped loving him. you moved on with your life, but could not move on from him.

he looked through a few tables and his eyes paused for a moment as he found a familiar face. he was looking at you. his breath kind of paused. he could not believe he was actually looking at you. he was walking towards you, his steps careful for god knows what.

"y/n?" he spoke. you couldn't read his face, you didn't know what he was thinking. but his voice, it made your heart flutter, just like the old days.

"hey, heeseung" you smiled a little. it wasn't forced but it wasn't sure either. he smiled back, pulling the chair across you, making himself comfortable.

"how have you been?"

"great? I guess." All of this still felt surreal. you couldn't ask back the question because you knew. you knew he was doing great being a part of one of the biggest kpop groups, gaining recognition worldwide. he succeeded and you were happy for him.

the tension was too much. heeseung didn't know if he could further ask questions because he didn't know whether you were comfortable talking to him after all these years. deep down he wondered if you still liked him. it kind of seemed stupid for him to even question that because it's been too long and of course you would have moved on.

the situation seemed to sink in through you and you decided you had to face it, face him. you really didn't know how to deal with your feelings towards him, or the way you felt the nostalgia of being with him, but you had no other option.

the air seemed heavy to you until the waiter interrupted the scene, placing heeseung's drink on the table with a smile and then he walked away. heeseung took a sip of his drink and nodded with satisfaction. you noticed it was the same drink he had ordered when you were together. yis tastes haven't changed.

"it's the same cafe mocha." you muttered but it was loud enough for him to hear.

"oh yes." he smiled. "but yours changed. it's not cappuccino anymore."

"things change, i guess."

silence fell over you both as each of you took sips of your drinks awkwardly, not knowing what to say.

you broke the ice by saying, "i've seen you on the internet, you're doing pretty good."

"oh yeah, i'm doing good, sort of. it's really hard tho, sometimes. but i chose the path, so i endure it."

"yeah. it's kind of thrilling too, i guess. the fans, the craze, being on stage, making people happy."

"it really is, all of the hard times are worth it."

heeseung was still the same. every little thing about him was the same. it made you want to go back to the times you were together. so badly. it made you want to belong to him, once again. you knew it wasn't possible, you disliked your heart for still feeling this way.

on the other hand, heeseung felt the same. he missed being with you. he missed having ice cream with you after school, he missed your study dates which were just him staring at you most of the time, he missed the way you smiled when you noticed him staring at you, he missed how you held on to his little finger when you guys were in heavy crowds, he missed the way you would immediately gasp and start laughing quite loudly when he startled you with back hugs out of nowhere.

he sighed. "y/n you know that i didn't break up with you because i didn't like you, right? i mean i still could've stayed with you but because i wouldn't be able to give our relationship my best when i was prepari-"

"i know, heeseung. i know. i understand. it was quite difficult for me too, it was the worst to be honest. but i knew why you did it and that's why i never blamed you. it was fair. and well it's not like i can help myself with those feelings that are still left for you in my heart, but i support you with your choices."

heeseung was surprised to hear that. you still had feelings left for him. you still liked him. loved him even. the emotions he felt were unclear. he felt shocked? surprised? he didn't know. but one thing was that he surely felt happy to hear those words.

"you still have feelings left for me?"

you wanted to tell him the truth. it was destiny that you both met like this, and you didn't want to lose your chance.

"yes, hee. i still love you. i don't think it's easy to get over you. you're the only person i've ever loved so bad. i don't think i can feel the same towards anyone else, even after several years passed."

heeseung wanted to be with you so bad, he wanted to be back with you, he wanted to feel at home, safe. and he knew he would never get that with somebody else. everytime he face difficult situations in life, you always had his back. you were like the everlasting hope he had in life.

"i'm... glad. so glad, y/n. I wanted to meet you as soon as possible. after i debuted, i looked for chances to come see you. It was really really difficult for me. even during the trainee days, everytime i had a hard time, i thought of you. just thinking of you gave me comfort. i thought of all the things you've said to me whenever life was against me. it kept me going."

you were so so happy to hear those words coming from him. just the thought of being his comfort, even with physical absence, and the fact that he kept thinking about you even after years of break up. you felt really really happy.

heeseung sighed as he smiled at you. he has said everything he wanted to say to you, he was late but he did. he felt relieved.

"anyways, what i wanted to say is, i want us to try again y/n. i want you to be my girl, once again. i want to give us another chance, i want to give myself another chance, another lucky chance to belong to you."

you didn't have to think twice. you felt the sincerity in his words. his eyes, which were full of love and longing, said much more than his words did.

you sighed deeply, chuckling at yourself.

"yes, yes i will be yours heeseung, again. and i hope this works out for us. i wouldn't want to lose you to anything again. i love you."

"i love you too. literally so damn much."

[slowlydifferentbluebird]

Do you still do “How would (X) react to?” Would love to see you do a “How would IVE react to Y/N after accidentally ignoring/neglecting them during a fanmeeting/concert.”

Gosh, it has been so long since I did one of these the last time. I don't even remember why I stopped, probably I was just overworked. I guess writing one of those can be fun from time to time, so yeah, I'll write it for you🙈

IVE reacting to Y/N ignoring them during a fanmeeting/concert

Gaeul

The oldest was confused about your behaviour. You two always had a great chemistry on and off the stage, but right now it almost seemed your first time working together. She tried numerous time to pose with you during the night, but you always were with another member. She smiled through the pain and waited the end of the stages. You didn't even notice and you were more confuse than her when she asked for explanations. However you two made peace in few time and a night of cuddles was the best way to close that silly story.

Yujin

If Yujin could overturn the table, she would have done it in that instant. She was the leader and she must behave in the perfect way, but, oh boy, she was so pissed at you for not accepting her flirt during the fanmeeting. Maybe she was too much in character but she hated seeing you being lovey-dovey with another member. She acted cool during the event but at the end she took you in another room and she gave you lesson(how? That's up to you👀)

Rei

The japanese girl was good in hiding her feeling and she really tried her best to be all smiling for her fans, but she could swear you didn't look in her direction for all night. She even tried to catch your attention, waving her hand in your direction but it almost looked she was invisible for you. After the show, she came to your room and she explained how bad she felt for your actions. You immediately hugged her and promised to be more careful the next time. Feeling your touch, her smile came back in no time.

Wonyoung

Wony is used to receive attentions, by the fan, the members and, in particular, you. You were her partner in crime, but right now the only crime you were doing was ignoring her. She had to make a "fake" complain in front of the public to have you by her side again. And from that moment she linked her arm with yours and never let you go for the rest of the fanmeeting. In the next day you better expect a lot of comments by her about betrayal and similar lol

Liz

Liz was so afraid of something she didn't even do. But if you were ignoring her, there was a reason, right? Well, actually no, you simply had your head on the clouds, but the poor girl couldn't have known that, so in the next days she tried her best to be forgiven by you: gifts, praises and a quantity of attention you have never received from her. When you finally understood what was all that about, you promised yourself to not ignore the cutie anymore, so you started to give her even more attentions that she wanted to🙈

Leeseo

It was a miracle that the maknae didn't start to cry during the fanmeeting. She always seek for your approval and when you started talking to everybody except her, her heart cracked a bit. When you noticed her lucid eyes tho, you immediately ran to her, asking what was wrong. Was she feeling sick? Did somebody piss her off? You were worried and ready to throw your hands at the same time. That was enough to make her understand that everything was okay and you didn't hate her or anything else. However for all the day you were extra-protective with her, keeping her close to you till night

~~~

Well, Anon, I hope you liked it. I'm definitely out of the loop and it might be not that great, but at least I tried 🙈💙

Zazá

[astrologythingzzz]

Moon sign observations ✨🌝

Hi everyone! I've thought about doing these for a very long time now! I'll be using my own experiences with the moon signs! 🌙

Some observations are going to be more accurate than others!

Take what resonates and please know that none of these are meant to hurt anyone! 🌝

P.s. I started a tiktok account. It's called Astrologythingzzz too. Check it out if you want to! 🧡

Aries moon

My mom has this placement. She's very ambitious, but also really loves to experience new things every other day! She can be very impulsive with money (it is in her 2nd house). Her emotions sometimes get the best of her. She needs variety and stimulation, when she was in her 20s she travelled a lot and had a big friend group! Personally, I've never met many people with aries moons so she's my only reference.

Taurus moon

My dad is a taurus moon. His most used sentence is "You can save money in every part of you life, but you should never save money when it comes to food." I think that's very typical for taurus placements. He craves stability and peace. He loves good food, dancing and family time. His love language is also giving you food that you like! He likes tradition, he's from Italy so he always makes sure that his children are very much in touch with his roots.

Gemini moon

That is my placement! I don't know anyone else with that placement, so I'll write down my own experience with this one. I'm bored easily, but I'm not superficial. Actually I'm not that social and not very outgoing. As a Child i loved reading and fantasising. I get very restless and nervous, sometimes I have sleep issues if my body is in distress (it is in my 12th house tho). I feel like there are two different gemini moon people, the one is the social, outgoing one, the other is socially withdrawn and nervous. Guess I got the latter one! 🌝

Cancer moon

These are the most loving, warm hearted people ever. They do everything for their family, they provide and make the best gifts! They really listen to the people they love, they also sense your feelings and are amazing at comforting. One of my best friends that I used to talk to had this placement. Sadly we are not involved with each other anymore, but she always felt like home to me. You can count on them to cook you your favorite meal or bake your favorite cookies!

Leo moon

Sadly I've never been truly involved with one. The ones that I know are very obsessed with their image. The girl has really long hair, she's even known for it. But the guy has always been very attention craving. He is very sweet deep down and romantic. But also kind of toxic, I feel like he's an unevolved leo moon. Hopefully I'll get to know more leo moons, they seem so warm and welcoming!

Virgo moon

My girl bestfriend has this placement. We both love talking about kind of everything (mercurial moons) wether it be books, gossip, personal stuff... She gets stomach issues when stressed. She loves animals, she has a very deep bond to her pet dog. She lives vegan and loves minimalistic interior design. She always cared for her younger siblings, cooking for them, sometimes even taking the role of a caretaker (she's a cancer sun). We haven't been very much in touch lately, but I still cherish her a lot! She helped me getting through many things and I can count on her to always be honest with me. I have also shared a flat with two other virgo moons, the one was absolutely crazy about houseplants, she had like 30 in her room. She was very nice and gentle, but a little too naggy for me. The other one is my soulsister, we always grabbed food or cooked together which was very fun!!

Libra moon

Sadly, I didn't have the best experience with this placement. A friend in school had this, and she just was very passive aggressive. She wasn't romantic or warm, she was rather cold and aloof. When I started dating my boyfriend, she got so jealous and accused me of never having time for her. We never really hung out anyways, but that's when she started getting toxic. Her mother was very strict so she also became like that. She was also the one person that always complained about the exams but in the end she always had A's. We lost touch after school and I'm very glad about it. I know that she was probably an unevolved libra moon, so I hope I'll get to know the nice, gentle and loving ones! 🌚

Scorpio moon

I lived with one for about 4 months. She was very shy, but she was willing to open up. When you criticised her, she felt completely offended and never really talked to me ever again. She moved out very soon and my other flat mates and I weren't so sad about it. She never talked to us, she didn't even get out of her room after this one incident, where we criticised her for never coming out of her room. We were 4 girls sharing a big flat, 3 of us were always going out and having fun together, she never even read our text messages so we just assumed she didn't want to be involved with us. She just seemed very cold. In the end she blamed us for being cold, even though we invited her out for like a 100 times. We were even a little scared of her, she just seemed so unfriendly. I have never heard of her every since and I'm not mad about it.

Sagittarius moon

I know some people with this placement. Actually many of them are studying to become a lawyer and they're pretty good at it. One of them is becoming a police officer the other wants to be a politician. They cherish their own opinion a lot, they love living life as they want to. They are down for partying every weekend, I also saw a connection with drinking too much... Sometimes the girls are "not like other girls" because of their love for danger and adventure. One of them always felt the need to rub under my nose how much she liked to perform sports and whatever. They are very sporty though. But I sometimes get the feeling they take themselves too seriously. Not my favorite moon placement, but they're alright. They can be a little braggy and their political views can be a little extreme. A love for animals and justice.

Capricorn moon

Sorry, but no. 🧡 They treat everything as a transaction, if they're giving you something, you automatically owe them. They can be funny though and really nice. They are very ambitious. I noticed they do have a problem with feelings, and if they're getting involved with you, it is for the long run. On the other hand, if you don't seem like the one, they will just leave you hanging around until they find a better option. Maybe that's just my experience. I feel like their childhood was very strict, they had to look after themselves and their parents weren't very supportive of them. Might have a narcissistic mom.

Aquarius moon

That's another placement that was my flatmate. She also had a very rough childhood. Her father wasn't even involved, her mother always favoured her brothers over her. It was really hard getting to know her and even though i had loved to stay in touch with her, I haven't heard of her after moving out, which is kinda sad. She was very emotionally codependent on her boyfriend, so there wasn't really space for any other relationship in her life. I just hope she's happy now. :) The other aqua moon I know studies the same subject at university like me. We get along very well, but we're not best friends. She also seems a little distant, she lives in her own world and has her own circle of friends. But she's very nice and very human(?) I love talking to her, it just makes me feel great! 🧡

Pisces moon

This one is a little tricky. My boyfriend has this placement, and he's the most gentle, kind, supportive, understanding and loving person I know. Pisces moons can be the most creative, selfless and caring people in the world. On the other hand, my bully in high school had this placement 💀 She always used me for homework and talked sh*t about me behind my back. I feel like pisces is a placement in general, that really needs to learn how to deal with their gentle and sensitive nature. It seems like many of them try to mask their feelings by being mean/ dominant/aggressive. But it's no weakness to show emotions! 🧡 Because of my boyfriend, it's probably my favorite moon sign! 🧡

That would be it! Hope you liked it!

If you can't resonate, please know that these are my personal experiences with the moon signs. Every moon sign has an evolved and unevolved part. I feel like I met a lot of unevolved ones. Sadly.

Anyways, see you soon, love you. Byee🧡

[zeevoidlight]

I think Vegeta was a virgin up until he met Bulma.

I know, what a freaking way to start an argument but blame reddit for asking and leading me to a trail of autism thoughts, and I will also talk about Vegeta's attraction to Bulma and viceversa when they first met. Like, how tho. Albeit from a demisexual perspective (or asexual, idk anymore really). (I saw the latin dub but as I have heard it is very similar to the japanese version but I'll reference the japanese one if i found footage of it).

/////

Some might believe that because of his attitude, his raw power, his Saiyan heritage, his status as conqueror of planets, genocidal maniac, sociopath extraordinare, his military background and his ruthlessness and uncaring nature, Vegeta was raping people left and right, or that he has always been very sexually active, or at least had some experience regarding the matter.

But be honest, he was too dense with everything from his childhood traumas and his vengeance against Frieza to care about having sex, or having a relationship with anyone in any capacity.

Also he is too proud and values his Saiyan heritage too much to give anyone he didn't deem worthy the privilege to have sex with him, let alone risk the possibility of an offspring. At least that's how I see Vegeta being pre Namek and pre dying against Frieza having to confront and accept by force an overwhelming amount of feelings on a rollercoaster for the first time in years. Dude didn't even thought two times to kill Nappa and let Raditz rot instead of reviving him as the last remainings of his people, that's how dense he was prior. He was so proud that he didn't mind to be the only Saiyan left alive and probably preferred it that way. Nappa that one time suggested to him that they could revive the Saiyan race by mixing with earthlings and Nappa was ready to pound (consensual or not) and Vegeta is like "nah, are you crazy? I wouldn't like to have a child being stronger than me". Dude probably had the opportunity to do so some other times but rejected it, he doesn't sound interested at all, first thinking on other things than sex. Added to that the detail that Toriyama was asked and said that Saiyans basically only get together sexually for the purpose of reproduction, is not a necessity for the most part in the same way it is for humans.

Of course he wasn't oblivious to it like Goku though and was well aware because he's not stupid. Outside of the English dub he notices Bulma on Namek and even refers to her as gorgeous, or pretty earthling woman. So I guess he still had a sexual notion but in other ways. He was not innocent of mind is what I'm saying. Like, he must have known what flipping the bird means. Is probably not that he didn't knew what sex was and desired it at some point or joked about it like I guess they'd do in Frieza's army but he was just not interested on acting on it for real at that time.

But then, after Frieza died and everything that happened after his disaster visit to Earth and Namek, after loosing literally everything and having no purpose anymore other than wait and find Goku to best him, and after having realized more of himself in vulnerable ways trying to find some sense of normality in who he perceived he was, here comes Bulma all confident, infatuated and aggressive with him, because of course she like the bad boys (and Vegeta is actually canonically deemed as handsome), and because Vegeta let his guard down for one second and let Bulma be Bulma while he literally couldn't do anything but go along (I suppose Piccoro was the only one that could have fight him if he tried anything). And he already found her attractive too in a way, not only that but she was probably the first woman that wasn't scared of him and even challenged him, treating him as an equal and as just another person, flirting with him openly, living with her and her family as a guest which is a completely different context to what he had been doing to survive his medium. Like, no one really talks about it but he spent 6 months! with her, her family, and like 50 namekians all living together before asking for Goku to "revive", and that time of waiting calmed him down a great deal already.

His interactions with Bulma

So just so happens that now he can think on other things that aren't killing Frieza and escaping his rulership. He had to learn this new types of interactions and how to deal with them in his own way, and that includes how to approach someone that he felt attracted to. Who knows if he had other people he felt that attraction towards, probably, but Bulma is the one that basically said "yeah, I'm down if you want".

The fact that he calls her "vulgar" when she first flirted with him says a lot of how he would not engage with just anyone because of his pride as a prince and a Saiyan, and how she probably was the first to even flirt with him openly. How he says she is "loud" and called her "woman" also says that he was more likely annoyed by the idea of women as gender like it often happens, belittling them and all. While on the other hand Bulma constantly challenged him on it once they got to Earth, forcing him to address the topic as we see several times, being strong against him. Like (again I'm going with the Latin version since I've heard is more accurate to the japanese version), Bulma says to him "and what about you, small one", and he's like "what?!... She called me small one?..." (in japanese she just calls him Vegeta-kun, like a pet name), he was not willing to dignify the provocation huffing to Bulma's invitation after but didn't menace her nor got aggressive or sarcastic like he would with someone else. But then she said "I'm going to give you a lot of food. Bet you eat as much as Goku, am I wrong? haha!... But I'm not going to allow you fall in love with me even if you find me very attractive", and is in this moment where you can see Vegeta's wtf face entering panic mode resorting to insult her under his breath as if she could see through him. Is right here where you see that he doesn't really know how to react to someone flirting and is debating between bursting in anger or run away but just ends up paralyzed because his ego won't let him move. (in japanese he reacts by muttering "what a vulgar woman! and how loud she is (being)!")

Then they go to Bulma's house and Vegeta just tags along. It seems that going through Namek with the earthlings, helping each other and cooperating like his life depended on it was an experience for a lifetime. My man can't seem to get a rest from one wft after the other since he arrived to Earth because the next thing that happens is that Bulma's mother comes to him faster than light startling him and says "[]...I imagine you must be Bulma's boyfriend. You ARE charming. And it looks like you are trendy". And the only thing he can muster to reply back is "t-trendy?" (I find it funny that that's what he reacted to and not to being called Bulma's boyfriend XD)

Vegeta's disinterest and rejection is part of why I think Bulma was interested on him. Because the interactions Bulma has had with men in general throughout the entirety of the series have been... very poor to say the least. Men want take advantage of Bulma in one way or another but more often than not sexually (I mean just being in Roshi's general vicinity is more than enough for anyone), or they see her as a "thing" for themselves, a trophy. (this one bellow was so terribly stressful, my god...)

And Bulma's approach to men is a similar as well because she is clearly very superficial too and that has remained a constant since day one. (jesus, bulma)

And Vegeta wasn't interested on taking her like that, on the contrary he pushed her away despite being interested (which I bet Bulma knew or at least expected because of her own ego), and also he had greater objectives he wanted to pursue. Focused (on surpassing Goku...), determined, and that was the difference. He doesn't seem like the type of guy that would try to get an opportunity to peek through the shower window seeking to get a glimpse of her like we have seen others do (although, Bulma did saw him through the shower doors), or disrespect her in any physical way. Far from it, his reactions with her are getting all nervous, speechless, flustered, he follows her (because in a way he does respect her character and leadership), aggressively rejecting her at the same time (trying to negate his feelings to go back to the status quo), calling her names, and Bulma isn't taking none of that because she doesn't believe that bs he's spouting and she knows he likes her (like, who wouldn't, as she probably tells herself), even plays with it sarcastically and either brushes it off or dares him to say it again. And I can see why is she so insistent too, because she also likes him.

He lets her get close to him but cautiously (the comparison to a stray cat is not too farfetched). He knows what Bulma wants but just now he has found someone that confronts him about it without fear or shame, he has now the mental space to think about it and needs to respond to it somehow, he is interested back too, he IS aroused by her as well. When he arrives to Bulma's house from his search in space and Yamcha and him are al tense with each other, Bulma arrives and says all calmly "Calm down, boys. Why don't you let him take a shower first?", she touches him and says "C'mon. You have to take a shower because you are VERY dirty" *finger movent, "Come. It's this way". That flinch he does when she touches him while going into fight or flight mode again, and the famous sexy finger movement on Bulma's part that completely seeks to throw him off and serve as a sexual invitation that he quietly accepts (even before she yells at him to stop gawking and not let a damiselle wait) by being passive and following her lead to the surprise of everyone in the scene.

I mean, I'm not the most versed person regarding this (as you can probably see) but It's happened to me where someone gives me something they have to hand me, and they let their hand stay a little longer than usual, or unnecessarily caress your palm with their fingers or nails with the intention for you to notice the unusual movement and tingly sensation as a way of flirting and invite you to sexy time. So I see this the first time and i'm like "Bulma?... ~what is this?~ I see your game" while remembering the first time someone did that to me so clearly. People think that because it's some people's first time you'll be all awkward and won't know how to be sexy too, specially being an older virgin person which would be Vegeta's case, but nah, you just gotta be confident and say "fuck it, I want this too and will give you a good time as well". It is how I picture Vegeta, ultimately knowing his value (also ultimately accepting something for himself after loosing everything on Namek) and enjoying himself as well (like, "serving himself with the bigger spoon" as they say) once they got there when he had to take a decision and answer Bulma's provocations.

(Also, I never totally understood why Bulma's mom was spilling the tea in the background at that moment but I suspected it was because it meant to signify Vegeta and Bulma were "cooking" and very into each other, and not just her being careless and aloof tho using that as a way to convey it).

Every time they in a scene she's measuring him with every interaction they have from the moment they got back to Earth onward, to see how far he's willing to allow her go, and hitting him with another wtf reaction every now and then to trow him off. Even going as far as put him in ridiculous and assert HER dominance. Because is not that he couldn't have just blasted everyone away with every step but little by little both were forming a connection. The scene of the pink shirt, after Vegeta gets offended by the style she says "If you don't want them you can walk around nude"... D: (his pikachu face was better than mine though, and then he says "damn, she's very rude"). I mean... is there anything more clear than that.

And then she sees him and says "You really look good like that...". Not only that but when Vegeta senses Frieza arriving he gets mad, insults Yamcha for doubting his ability to sense Frieza's chi, they're about to fight each other and Bulma is cooking some meat and is like "Vegeta, if you want to use the sauce I have it here", and everyone, specially Vegeta, is visibly confused and he doesn't know how to respond, the scene is left unanswered. But Bulma is pushing to see if Vegeta can be gentle and mannered.

(side note: Trunks says that after his arrival Yamcha was going to be unfaithful to Bulma but no man, That's what future Bulma told him but is more likely that it was her the one that left him for Vegeta that day, way before Trunks arrived. Even on Namek she already was over him, thinking of Goku and how she lost her train with him, then with Zarbon, and finally Vegeta (she also had a picture of Yamcha in her little camp in Namek full of darts to his face, so...). Yamcha never really had Bulma, and he didn't do much to get her back either or change. Truth is Bulma is the crazy one). And then when Frieza arrives to Earth Bulma arrives at the scene too and explains that since she couldn't see Frieza in Namek she wanted to see him here to see how strong he really was, and Vegeta says "not only she's rude but aggressive/daring too..." In this very soft thoughtful tone and talking to himself, like... C'mon dude! Accept that you like her!

And then then! when everyone is going towards Frieza's ship, Bulma is the one who yells "Wait, Vegeta! take me with you! Remember who hosts you!" (is that how you say it? dar alguien hospedaje?). Yamcha is completely out of her picture.

We see the next time the most obvious episode where the love tones are more present, Vegeta's training montage after the news of the androids, and his accident with the gravity chamber, but by then it was just confirmation of all the signs from before. So when we see Bulma with baby Trunks it doesn't really come out of nowhere and you understand how and why.

While I find Super's tsundere Vegeta in some instances fun to watch, more with him and Goku to be honest, but I don't think Z Vegeta was taking it in such a juvenile way, he's more adult and mature still about the situation, as mature as someone calling a girl "woman" to assert dominance that is. The flirting "dance" towards their sexual encounter is more silent and elegant, just like two adults would do so. He wants to get closer but the only thing the dude has known his entire life is fighting and being on offense mode all the time while at the same time having to hide. Their dynamic is quite interesting and quite amazing, not for nothing they are considered to be one of if not the best couple in anime, and trying to unravel how it all started is really fun.

But yeah, As I see it and if we could compare Vegeta's sexuality to something from real life he, as most saiyans, was probably demi-sexual (yay), since it's said that Saiyan's don't understand romance and they likely only had sex to reproduce. They didn't had the concept of family outside of the royal family. And that's why also Vegeta is one of the few saiyans that later could develop an understanding of family and being in a relationship in a way other saiyans don't, including Goku.

So yeah, that's my terminally online post of the day. Nothing but Dragon ball and Vegeta on my mind lately.

I would like to get into analyzing Goku and Vegeta's sexuality soon too. It's so interesting as well because is not traditional.

[darcyfangirlsfrequently]

my reactions to episode 6 of season 2 of criminal minds evolution

spoilers under the cut!

the alarms blaring and dead people everywhere just reminds me of the way "Saturday" begins

Okay I thought this was real until I saw Luke shot and half dead on the floor. Yay for Tara being so concerned though, TarVez besties canon!!

Okay when they said we'd hear prentiss singing, this is NOT what i had in mind

JESUS christ wtf is this

Aww I love seeing Penelope take care of her friends

Luke and Penelope being beside each other in a frame 🥰 getting my garvez crumbs where i can

Tara Lewis you are SO pretty

Penelope knowing her dad is at the end of his rope and being SO patient with him 😂😂 (also, luke, i see you staring at her)

Is Rossi about to have a fucking breakdown in the middle of the BAU?? I can't handle that

Luke following Penelope into her office YESSSSS

Oops i guess not. that's jj.

Penelope there is one person on this team i can understand you struggling to look at... JJ isn't them. what's going on?

"It's between beige and bad kissing" well penelope i feel like if you got with a certain someone you'd never have to deal with that again

JJ reading her besties to shit. I love my OG BAU girls

Penelope you are NOT ALLOWED TO BE JEALOUS

tyler's ex is so pretty tho

Luke wipe that smirk off your face 😂

"Even more awkward than you working with Tyler is him working with me" Luke do you HEAR yourself??? You are outing yourself and your feelings even more. You are ADMITTING your jealousy

"Luke we need you in here" not even TWO SECONDS LATER i knew it was coming but it's still funny

PENELOPE GARCIA DID YOU JUST TOUCH HIS ARM????

Penelope's "oh" upon finding out who teresa is. this is just a group of exes up in here

Tara 🤝 Emily wives calling Dave out for not going to therapy

Soft Tara and Dave!! I love them.

ROSSI WORDLESSLY REACHING OUT FOR TARA'S HAND I AM IN SHAMBLES

JJ sneaking a cheeto 😂 i'm glad there are SOME consistencies in this show

High Emily is just Paget

Emily is so right about salt and vinegar chips. They're the BEST.

Does a picture of sergio in the background count for my sergio square on my bingo card?

Tara and Emily having the same middle name canon

"I didn't know super hot latina was your type" Well, Penelope, now you have something in common

TYLER setting boundaries i love to see it.

Mutual airing of exes... now i wonder if she brought Luke up or hid that particular detail

Wait shit I was half joking in my fic when I said tyler was still in love with teresa, but if he fr is i will be so happy and rooting for them

luke having to ask the ex of the ex of the love of his life what the story is with her and said ex

"I had a thing for army guys" NO NO NO IF THEY TRY TO MAKE TERESA AND LUKE A THING I WILL FLIP

luke's heart eyes watching penelope's presentation

oh she's calling tyler OUTTTTTT

"81% of stalking victims are stalked by someone they know." Two things. 1. Love Luke getting his Spencer Reid moments and getting to be smart. 2. THIS IS A GOLDEN OPPORTUNITY TO TALK ABOUT ALEXEI STANOVICH AT SOME POINT

"sticky chemistry that is in the room between us all" means Penelope is acknowledging the her and luke stuff as well

LESS awkward to do boys with boys and girls with girls??? Penelope are you KIDDING???

"that's the less awkward option?" tyler i feel you

Luke's face is like "babe are you KIDDING i just told you me working with him is so awkward"

"For me and Teresa it is" icon

Tyler HAS to know that there is something Garvezy happening, because he and Luke seem to be the only people grasping the true awkwardness of this situation

oh so this is NOT emily's first time high. Temily writers i would like fics about them getting high together please and thank you

"I'm quitting" fucking LIES you won't leave them like that

WEED LACED CHEETOS??? DO THOSE REALLY EXIST???? god poor jj

"now being around him i know he's over me because i don't feel it anymore" i know penelope's ensuing awkwardness is supposed to be because she DOES still feel it with tyler or whatever, but i'm choosing to believe it actually has her thinking about Luke

"a list of everyone you've ever made angry" luke babes you are going to be at the TOP of that list

okay i have been WAITING for this tyler/luke fight

oh tyler did NOT use luke being a ranger against him

wtaf is this conversation. i'm living for it but it's WEIRD

HAHA voit's rossi impression

Bailey mention!!

Hate to see Rossi struggling. But I have to admit Voit's manipulation of him is so well done

Morgan AND Hotch mention. When's the last time we got a Morgan mention???

So they're finally talking about BAU-gate... and they're high. lovely.

The way Luke says "Penelope Garcia" and cannot even stop himself from smiling

omg luke finally speaking spanish!! (@lklvz how're you coping?)

Luke's grandmother mention!!

ugh they're so gonna try to make luke and teresa a thing. aren't they.

OH WHAT THE FUCK. TERESA CALLING LUKE TF OUT FOR BEING A PENELOPE SIMP WAS NOT WHAT I EXPECTED

OH MY GOD HE ACTUALLY JUST SAID HE LOVES HER

Also, Luke, wdym Penelope knows??? Bc i ASSURE you she does not

"it was a hard pass for both of us" LIES

noooooooooooooooooooo how did we go from something SO GARVEZ to teresa essentially asking him out? Lady he just said he's in love with someone else this will not go well for you

what is this video game conversation

maybe i'm just tired but i do NOT get what voit is alluding to with north star and stuart house

Tyler this feels kinda stupid

if i had a nickle for every time luke saved tyler's life, i'd have two nickles. which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice, right?

Luke and Tyler friendship arc???

okay. Jemilys, how are y'all doing? I might not get you, I might not be one of you, but I know you're losing it

OH EMILY KNOWS ABOUT THE MISCARRIAGE I'M SOBBING

If Teresa asks Luke out in front of Penelope i will SCREAM

So Penelope definitely thinks Luke/Teresa is a thing but I'm pretty sure that howl was her telling Luke to be brave and tell Penelope he loves her

oh THIS is where Jill comes in. I keep forgetting about her.

ahhh this was so good

[roturo]

SUGAR RUSH RIDE - uncle!gojo satoru x reader

① NEW NOTIFICATION FROM THE DEVIL BY THE WINDOW:

→ I can see the forbidden lines slowly fade away, so don't give into temptation sugar.

warnings: breeding kink, smut, rough sex, step-cest, reader is a virgin, Suguru Getou is your dad, but is never mentioned, size kink, maybe pt2, i'm proud of this one tbh, spend like 3 days doing it, probably it's not that good tho, not proof read, reader has a crush on Gojo since 15teen years old, almost caught, caught masturbating, use nicknames (sugar, baby, princess, sweetheart...) afab!reader.

TUMBLR IS BASED ON A REBLOG SYSTEM. PLEASE REBLOG MY WORK. THANK YOU. ENJOY.

Uncle 'Toru was your favorite. He bought you everything you wanted, even though, your dad, told him not to spoil you much, he still did it. Mostly because you're his only ¨little sugar¨

He's not your biological uncle, but that´s okay.

At the age of 15, you started feeling things for your dear uncle. And that´s not okay.

You decided to ignore it. Like, who wouldn't have a crush on your really hot uncle? You would say it's more admiration rather than a crush.

Most of the time he's at your house with your dad. Talking about sports, curses, and pitifully about some random girls they fucked at a club. Not like you'll tell them you heard that but still. He has brought many girls to the house, thinking she's the one, the next month he brings another one. Most of them are just for his money, to be spoiled, or for the sex.

And you know there's a borderline between you and him, you have tried getting a boyfriend but no one could get you as blushed as uncle 'toru did. He knows he has an effect on you, he can take control of you whenever he wanted. But oh.. who wouldn't like to corrupt a small thing like you? He bets you haven't reached an orgasm ever in your life, yet.

Poor little you, couldn't satisfy yourself with your small hands and tight hole. How much he wanted your hands to gets him off instead of the stolen panties from your room.

He imagined your small whines and begging for him to let you cum. Your small body under his, and your perked nipples asking to be devoured.

Guess it's time to be brave, next level for you baby.

He hasn't had a girlfriend for some time now, it's a weird thing for Gojo. Probably because when he was fucking some random girl he moaned your name, and since then, he was too fucking scared to fuck up again.

Didn't want to risk his chance with you.

18 years. Probably still a virgin, if having sex with no orgasm counts. Sexually frustrated? Yes. Does anything about it? No.

While the fire spreads in your tummy, so close to the feeling of release, nothing comes.

And it doesn't help that you're trying to get off while your dad isn't home, and your uncle is sleeping next room.

Some business trip, uncle takes care of you, no boys allowed and blah blah blah.

Not that you complain.

He only went for some water, he didn't meant to see you all sprawled out in your bed, legs open, juices coming out of you, and a cute scrunched face with open mouth looking for that sweet spot. He swears he could just come now and right there. But he couldn't let temptation take control, at least not yet.

His determination came undone one day he found you moaning his name, and he couldn't take it anymore. His thoughts stopped breathing, not only that, but he's sure he stopped breathing too when he entered your room and saw you giving him doe shocked eyes, and trying to explain yourself with your shaking voice.

¨Uncle ´Toru! U-um, w-what are you doing here?!¨

Oh poor you.. Don't know what you got him into. All you could see into his eyes is lust.

¨Were you touching yourself?¨ He knows it's a dumb question to ask after spending nights fucking his fist at the image of you masturbating, but he still needed to confirm all of this was real before proceeding. Who knew the strongest sorcerer of all the times would be almost dropping to his knees just for a weak little girl like you.

¨I c-can explain¨ The only thing going around your mind, is how dumb you are for letting his name slip out of your mouth, you were so close, finally to release.

¨You´re bad, you liar. What did you do to me sugar?¨ The last bit was barely audible, but the nickname falling out of his mouth while you were still found on this humiliated situation made you press your thighs even closer, trying to find some friction.

At your action, he let out a devilish smile, knowing he had so much control over you made it lost it. With calculated steps, he began getting closer to you. You were frozen, every cell under your skin became more sensitive the moment his hands began exterminating your body, careful touches that made you leave small sighs at the light touch.

¨You're sure you want this sugar? Because there´s no turning back.¨ Is he really asking you this? After seeing you masturbating at the idea of him?

¨Y-yes, please gimme more¨ That´s all he needed to start kissing you with no remorse, his skilled tongue entering your mouth and the sweet taste of you got him seeing stars. He couldn't wait more time when his hands starting going from your wait to your perked nipples, his fantasy was becoming true when he began playing with your nipples and you let out a small moan that made him stop kissing you to admire your beautiful body. You became an addiction to him with just one sweet taste.

He started leaving kisses from your neck until his mouth found your tits and started sucking on them, you swear you´re going to have purple marks in the morning.

The pleasure started becoming too much and he hasn´t even started touching you where you craved him more.

Your hands started undressing him, eager to touch his body, you could feel his stomach flex at the small touches you gave him.

¨You look so pretty all sprawled out, just for me. Tell me sugar, am I your first?¨ the small pinch he gave you in your waist made you jump, only giving him nods. All fucked up, and you haven´t even felt his cock, how cute.

¨Uncle 'Toru... please¨

¨Please what princess? Words, gimme words..¨ You couldn´t take it anymore, you grabbed his hands guiding it to your core. ¨Please... come a little closer... I need you.¨ Tears started going out of how stressed you were, finally, you're having the forbidden taste.

You heard him unbuckling his pants, ready for what's coming next, you opened your legs even wider. The wetness of your pussy falling out into the bed sheets. His fingers found your core, he wasted no time inserting them. He could reach places never in a million days you could reach. ¨Next time, learn to close your door sweetheart, because i'll no longer have self control if I found you like this again. I don´t care your father is home or not. I'll make sure your neighbors know my name from start to even backhand.¨

His voice made you shiver, the though of your dear dad finding out made you even hotter. The feeling of his fingers had you moaning his name like a prayer.

The lost of touch made you whine, until the sharp and unexpected thrust of his cock into your tight hole, made you scream and cum all in once, the feeling was so sweet, you needed more. It's like he couldn't realize he made you cum with one thrust because he started moving his hips like there's no tomorrow. He couldn't even recognize himself of how lost in pleasure he was. The feeling of your pussy adjusting him made him feast up the night sky was, he swears this is all a dream. You were the devil to this world, to his world. He was no longer the devil for someone else.

Feeling your walls spasm and contract him, made the feeling of desire even stronger. ¨I'm gonna fill you up soo good. All you will think about is how good my cock is making you feel. You're going to be my little cum hole. All for me. Gimme' on more baby, c'mon, I know you can¨ His voice in your ear had you cumming, your nails scratching his back.

Gojo is a fan of sweets, but now? He has his new favorite dessert. With one last hard thrust he deposited his seed into you. He never thought he'll be in this position right now. He wanted more, but your fucked up face, tears still coming out your eyes, some saliva in your chin made him realize you can't take another round. His gaze began to come down your body, seeing purple marks in your beautiful body made his cock twitch. Your hole couldn't take more cum, his fingers collected the cum falling out and inserted them inside you again.

He had to get closer to you, in a way his cock was just right infront of your mouth. He kinda feels bad for seeing you this fucked up, but it made him harder seeing you like this. Now he wasn´t in his right mind, he grabbed your head and inserted his cock in your mouth. He wanted to fill you up with his seed on every corner of your body. With gentle thrusts of his dick inside your mouth to not hurt you was enough to have him coming.

¨I'm sorry baby... but you looked so good.¨ He let a groan when he saw you swallow his cum.

¨Can you see what you're doing to me sugar? This will not be the first time i'll have you like this. But this is the first time i'll treat you this gentle.¨

You couldn't wait for the next time.

¨Y/N? Gojo? I´m back!, I brought some takeout!¨

The voice of your dad got you looking Gojo's eyes, scared of what´s going to happen next, you didn't remember he was coming back today.

¨Let's see what impression daddy makes when he sees his little princess all fucked up full of his uncle cum huh?¨ And with that, he just clapped and disappeared. So fucking easy for him to just use his powers to made it look like he just didn´t made you have the best orgasm of your life.

All you could hear was far voices of your dad and uncle talking.

¨Oh, Y/N?, she´s sleeping right now, just checked on her.¨

You liar.

[pardonmydelays]

this is probably going to be the weirdest post ever written by me, but i do feel the need to write it, so let's go clowns (i doubt anyone besides prison gang will read it tho. and honestly i don't care, this is very personal anyway and i just need to get it off my chest).

i honestly don't even know how to start, but i'll try my best. i'm sitting right now in front of my laptop in my small apartment & i'm trying to find the right words. it's been a year. it's not easy to be alone, it gets really lonely sometimes, but at least i have my freedom. i have my music. i have my friends. i can do whatever i want. i gave up on a lot of things along the way & i am desperately trying to bring back this part of me i thought i lost long ago. one step at a time.

so it's been a year. maybe a little explanation: on june 1st, 2023, i made a decision to move out from my (now ex)fiance and try to live on my own. it wasn't easy for me, because despite all the things happening at the time, i was still in love. we were together for 3,5 years. i was supposed to marry this guy. i was happy. until i wasn't. i'm writing all of this, because it's been a year, and still to this day every time someone asks me about him i just laugh it off and change the topic. i didn't let myself mourn for even one day, i didn't cry, i just tried to block that memory and moved on immediately, desperately trying to hold onto new things as a form of distraction, i guess. but it's still inside of me and it still makes me fucking angry. so why i left... i was a victim of mental abuse for such a long time & i didn't even realize how bad it was. i don't want to go into details (now that i think about it, it was truly a disaster), maybe one day i will talk about it with a therapist (because i do consider going to therapy, more than ever now), but he crossed the line one night when he told me i should kill myself. unfortunately for him, i'm still alive. moving out wasn't easy, because i was on my own, too proud to ask any of my friends for help, pretending everything was fine for such a long time (until one time i had a mental breakdown at work in front of my manager but i don't wanna talk about it). so i moved out. had to block him everywhere cause he didn't want to let me live. the worst part of it is that i never really got any closure... i just left the apartment with my things one day and i remember he was laughing at me when i was leaving with tears in my eyes (the most fucking embarrassing thing that ever happened to me), he was probably too drunk to remember this tho. all the things he said to me are still living inside my head & i don't think i'll be able to build a normal, healthy relationship in the future without any help because i have massive trust issues now & very low self-esteem. anyway...

one of the things i had to do in order to forget was to find new obsessions & let go of the things that reminded me of him. so i found myself a new passion and built a huge unbreakable wall around myself out of it: musical theatre. on june 1st i watched hamilton and that was the only thing about me he didn't know (we used to watch pretty much everything together). it was mine. i finally found something that was entirely mine. it was something i really needed at the time and i'm not even kidding now, it was my lifeline. hamilton & lin-manuel miranda. you're probably thinking now that i'm not passionate about it anymore, because i changed my personality again, but that's just not true. it will be always a huge part of who i am and i will always be super grateful because it's something that literally saved my life when i needed it the most. taking a little bit of a break from it now is totally ok & i will probably talk about musical theatre again, soon. i missed my old self tho. i'm not even joking, i literally gave up on everything because of him (i couldn't even eat some of my favourite things anymore because they reminded me of him for such a long time, that's how traumatised i was).

i didn't even hold my ukulele for a year. A YEAR. i used to record videos of myself playing & singing and send it to him when he was at work. you don't know this, but this instrument was my biggest happiness for such a long time (ask bel, she got a lot of videos of me being a clown, too). i used to play twenty one pilots songs, no surprise there. we went to their show together (mostly because i wanted to go, he was never a huge fan but liked them a bit because of me). i stopped listening to them when we broke up, just like i stopped playing ukulele. all of those things found their way back to me this year. laugh all you want, i feel like this is a part of my healing journey. i'm writing this while sobbing like a child, because i'm listening to them right now and i am staring at my ukulele lying casually on my bed and i feel like the old me is back and I MISSED HER. SO FUCKING MUCH. YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW. i don't ever want to let her go again. i cannot lose her this time...

during this one year i found a lot of new things that i absolutely love and can't live without now. my passion for theatre, new friends (prison gang, this is mostly about you, i want you to know that everytime i doubt in myself i think about you & i know there's someone who actually cares & i love you so much you don't even know), i also realized i'm actually stronger than i thought. i'm here alone. in my favourite city in the world, 400km from home & my family, on my own, and i live. i survived. it's hard sometimes, but i am actually ok. and i'm here, just like i always wanted. wow.

i feel like the entire last year was me desperately holding onto new obsessions as my way to cope and block all my feelings. which doesn't mean it wasn't real. i am just letting it all go for now, to go back to it later. i just think it wasn't healthy, so i need a break. because deep down i wasn't really happy. now my twenty one pilots phase is back, stronger than ever, and it's mostly because their songs are so relatable for me & i don't feel so lonely anymore (when i listened to clancy for the first time & realized how much i relate to these songs i was speechless. it made me depressed. but the more i listen to it now, the better i feel. wow. i needed this album so much, it helped me process a lot of things that i've had hidden inside my brain). i feel like i am finally accepting things as they are. i am messed up, i'm not entirely fine but i am finally ready to talk about my feelings and honestly i feel more alive than ever. am i happy? no. but i will get there one day. i am healing and that's what matters.

this is chaotic, i know. i used to write things like that in my journal. maybe i will go back to it one day. but this time i'm using tumblr for that, simply because i want you guys to know this about me. she's back and i'm not letting her go this time. i need to take care of her, she deserves it.

[asco-bisco]

School Bus Graveyard Stereotypical Personality(?) AU

so i posted this on ao3 and im gonna delete the chapter with all this info but i still wanted to get this out js incase anyone is interested

Ashlyn Banner: The Introverted High School Girl

- I'm just getting a lot of Tall Girl vibes but I never watched the movie

- Still has the same personality but I might write a bunch of cringy ahh y/n stuff

- She still likes dogs just because

- She absolutely despises EVERYONE on a more alarming level (she hates Tyler)

- She pesters Taylor about wearing makeup

- She listens to Prom Dress by mxmtoon (at least she's supposed to give off the vibe)

- Still does ballet

- I don’t know how to run her under a stereotype without making her a ‘quirky’ girl or a pick me girl

Aiden Clark: Your Pyscotic Mosquito

- He has no concept of personal space (as usual)

- He needs to give off the annoying stalker vibe or creepy vibe, not the one everyone simps for

- Kinda stalks people (he knows where everyone in his group lives)

- He pulls pranks on people he doesn't like (He does the whoopie cushion prank on Tyler)

- I guess 10x crazier and maybe not as caring--if the roof thing with Ashlyn happened again, he'd probably call others to help instead or would end up inside the house before it even happened

- I don't know anymore

Ben Clark: Quiet Unpopular Kid

- He doesn't care about your well-being (idk)

- He's still the medic of the team though, if that makes sense

- His trauma is still there but his anger issues just exist, they don't get triggered from bullying though they just exist ig

- Maybe that's why he's unpopular

- I don't know if he should still live with Aiden or not

- I wanna make him mean idk y but he prob won't be

- He doesn't get as flustered as he does in the webtoon, like y'know those moments where he's just cute asf (maybe that's just me) but those moments don't exist anymore

Logan Fields: Nerdy Astronomy-Loving Boy

- He still has W shooting skills

- He's way shyer though like he full-on goes "U-Uhm, I-I-I-I-I t-th-thi-think we-w-we-we s-should g-g-go n-n-n-n-n-n-n-now"

- the stuttering is not that much tho (i would DIE writing that)

- Tyler and Aiden pick on him a lot (not together though, in their own time)

- Aiden purposely gets Logan to do things he doesn't want to do like face a phantom or go patrolling just to see him squirm and cry

- Whether or not he becomes the sassy S2 Logan we know is a secret (and to be decided)

- He sticks around Taylor a lot because Tyler and Aiden are basically bullies and Ashlyn and Ben are too scary to be around (they're both quiet people who give you death stares)

Taylor Hernández: Nice Popular Girl

- She loves everyone and teases her brother a lot

- She still has trauma (joking about it is how she copes)

- She is kind to EVERYONE but if you share lip gloss/mascara with her, you're keeping it forever (she doesn't want your germs)

- She’s blunt and doesn’t think before she speaks

- so passive aggressive it’s not okay

- The only person she doesn’t love is Barron and his friends

Tyler Hernández: Rude Popular Jock

- He hates everyone that aren’t his friends

- His ego is so high it’s not okay

- He loves Tay and Tay only

- He kind of makes sure everyone is in check unconsciously because he likes to nag others

- He picks on Logan and Ashlyn for their height (he leans on them)

- Mention his dad and he just might shoot you

- Doesn’t like physical bullying but if you give him a chance to insult you, he will do it

- He might end up fighting Ben if he ticks him off, that’s to be decided tho