#i guess i'll just fucking. go to work
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sga-owns-my-soul · 1 month ago
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my therapist (who i've been seeing for 11 years, since i was 14) is moving to another country and i feel like someone just told me my mom died
is this normal or am i insane
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maryasmorevna · 1 year ago
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can't believe a show based on a videogame (usually games adaptations are notoriously bad, which isn't the case here tho) gave me the beauty and the beast/twisted mirrors/enemies to traveling companions/ruthless antihero+optmistic but still badass heroine who takes none of his shit/age gap but make it sexy dynamic of my dreams. as much as i love maximus and i think he deserves the best writing ever because 1. he's a clever deconstruction of the aspiring Knight bro who's actually a bit of a loser and, as much as lucy, sees the world in black&white at first and then doesn't get what he thought he wanted but what he needs (or at least i hope he'll eventually get it), and 2. he's a cutie and i want an epic love story for him too, it's very funny how they tried to give us a puppy kind of romance and the tumblr girlies still fixated on the "toxic ~she bites his finger off and he cuts hers off and sews it on his hand in what we'll pretend it's a symbolic marriage rings exchange or whatever~ asshole who used to be a nice guy/good girl™ with a lot of spunk and hidden anger but unshakeable morals" kind of relationship.
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sukugo · 17 days ago
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question!! if tumblr does go down, where are you guys going to? or at least where are u most active outside tumblr?
#ive stopped using everything except tumblr and so i do need to think of where to go in case it's gone. so i guess i'd like opinions on where#f.txt#the reality is i know that if tumblr does disappear overnight i'll go and show signs of life on twitter#but idk twitter's life expectancy isn't looking very good vdfshfjf#i mean. it'll keep going but i know it's just going to keep getting worse#i know a lot of people have gone to bsky and if u have what's ur opinion on it? is it good? and do u like it#personally i never really got too interested bc it just feels like twitter 2.0#like interface and all that wise. it's just a copy of twitter from what i've seen. and i suppose it'll still be like short text post based#? havent actually used it so idk#at the end of the day i just wish there was smth else like tumblr. with the same posting and personaliztion capabilities#there's just nothing like tumblr 😭😭 i love the way it works a LOTTTTT. it's good it's honestly really good.#the people in charge just keep fucking it up for no reason 😭#the personalization options!!!! the incredible tagging system. being able to make sideblogs.#i want to make 2k posts about the thematic significance of gojo being a bottom. i wanna post 30 gojo images in the same post#i love having a desktop theme!! i love being able to change my blog's colors and everything. i love the countless post editing abilities.#I LOVE!!!!! THE TAGGING SYSTEM!!!!!!!!!!#i know a lot of people say that tumblr search doesn't work and while i do think it has its issues i think t's a sentiment born of not reall#understanding how it works. bc if u do. it's so easy to find what u're looking for#i guess the little issues earlier today made me realize that uh. yeah this site might actually be dying#and that fuck i should really export my blog OTL#but from what ive seen the export will take. a while.#and also think of where to go but.....nothing is tumblr 😭
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kaisollisto · 25 days ago
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#TKO_art 25#got so angry then spiral'd into an existential crisis#still in that crisis but if i don't think about it then i wont think about how nothing matters oh god its 2 late#at first it was a random angry side profile and then it turned into wuxia beatrice#which i'm not sure if that's a good thing or not and i think this looks too cringe so i'm not gonna look at this anymore#i just wanted to draw bea with an undercut#this reminded me of the time i actually wanted to draw beatrice in that wuxia style at the very beginning of my art journey#core memory unlocked#anyway i'll probably revist this sometime later#again bc their clothing is nice#i'm kinda annoyed because i didn't look up any refs for this and this looks pretty much like beatrice and i know when i go to work on#[redacted] it's gonna be a fucking pain#but also lets not discredit the fact that i was looking at beatrice refs for 3 hours before a small break and then this#sometimes i forget how much i love art#my existential crisis was making me doubt if doing art really is worth anything while i was sketching angrily#and really it was just me falling down a pit of oh this is what my next days will look like working on art to just be disappointed by the#end result that i forgot that it's a journey thing but most importantly u have to trust the process#but i also forgot making art is a slower type of gratification + serotonnin#i guess the thing is i'm waiting for the shoe to drop: burnout stage of art#where i do not want to touch art for years#and it's kinda because i push myself to do art like i'm going to die very soon that i'm worried about it#but also at the same time hmmmm idk bc seeing art is just so inspiring and makes me jealous that i kickstart myself into doing it#what are we talking about anyway blah blah blah
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danikatze · 7 months ago
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Another wip! It's kind of almost done :)
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valiant-if · 8 months ago
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i am 225k words into this work, and I only just now realized i assigned the $signlanguage variable (which is set super early) a "yes" or "no" text value instead of just making it a true/false variable
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galactaknightyaoi · 5 months ago
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making a fankid but shaking my head the entire time so people know i'm against the societal belief that everyone's goal and only purpose in life should be to have kids and form a family
#i snapped and made a rock kandi fankid#she was meant to be a one off design to cheer me up and give me something to do#but i made her too cute. now im attached#her name is lacey :) princess lacey at that#idk what im going to do to be able to fit her in my thing. rock kandi or just a kirby kid in general was Never meant to be a thing#that guy's an adult in my oc timeline. and he does fuck all all day as he always has. it's a part of his bit that he's not anyone important#outside of being the hero of popstar of course. he's not a knight or a king/prince. he's not even an adventurer. he likes his planet#and wouldn't want to be too far from it so the idea of being an explorer doesn't appeal to him.#at the end of every adventure he always returns to popstar because popstar's his home#he likes just being a normal guy who just saves the world from time to time. he likes fishing and eating and sleeping#and making friends and juggling children. it's just what he does all day. he loves it.#he's always been happy with simplicity and living in the moment no matter how boring that moment is#and i fear that this would accidentally lent itself to a like. kind of a deadbeat dad?? or take away too much of his carefree bum-ness#technically this is ribbon's and fluff's spawn since kirby can't have kids. so maybe i'll just make the world's first kirbyless rock kandi#whatever you'd call that. Fluffbon?#they all live in different places so i always figured it'd be kind of impossible for it too work out in the long run??#or it wouldn't be That serious. not serious enough for a lacey#which is why i didn't make it canon to my AU and shit and only enjoy it at a distance slash in like a vacuum#so I don't knowww i don't knowww but i'll figure it out i guess#text post
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bmpmp3 · 4 months ago
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im curious to see how we'll see how we feel about takehiro and the others' new designs when they're fully revealed but it did get me thinking about how i would design his outfit. unfortunately i realized very quickly that i would just put him in my own fashion style: department-store-clearance-core
#art#traditional art#watercolour#fanart#virvox project#kurono takehiro#vocal synth#voicevox#no id rn because i havent figured out how to translate all this to alt text yet... gimme a bit to think on it orz#BUT yeah like. well im sure their new designs will be fine. but one thing that did stand out to me. is that i do not like muscle tees LOL#and i guess it snowballed. i like fitted tank tops. and loose 90s moe tank tops. but not muscle tanks. turtlenecks are fine.#but you know maybe my walmart clearance fashion sense works for him. i always liked that he kind of dresses like some fucking guy#like his blazer is pretty slick but the rest of him is just a guy in jeans and a t shirt. and i love that#like akashi dresses like my grandpa with better colour sense. kotarou dresses like a pokemon trainer? sourin has his like#traditional modern stylish thing going on. and the mysterious fur strip glued on the back <3 and aoyama dresses lowkey kinda hypebeast#streetwear esque. but takehiro? thats literally just some dude <3 <3 <3 i do worry his new design will make him tooo trendy looking#BUT im intrigued. i think they said they're hoping to do multiple designs by a bunch of people? which i hope they can#the original designs had a very. moe? appeal. a distinct sort of cuteness and squishiness without being toothrottingly so#that might be missing from some newer designs but if we have a whole variety we can have like#a zola project situation at least. like we have the stylistic amano art all the way to the v6 glossy designs#a whole variety would be nice. but i am worried about ryuuseis hair the most lowkey. what are we gonna do without his huge bizarre fauxhawk#BUT maybe i should throw my hat in the ring.... really push myself to make more fan designs and outfits for all these characters i like#maybe i'll be able to draw something thats not just zhers clearance clothes. maybe i'll step up to gap clearance clothes. even winners??
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shalbef · 3 months ago
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Bnha×HP AU
Sorted students!
Gryffondors:
Kendo, Tsunotori, Tsuburaba, Tetsutetsu, Tokage, Fukidashi;
Aoyama, Ashido, Kaminari, Kirishima, Sero, Hagakure, Bakugo, Midoriya;
Hufflepuffs:
Awase, Komori, Shiozaki, Shoda, Honenuki, Bondo;
Asui, Uraraka, Koda, Sato;
Ravenclaws:
Kodai, Shishida, Yanagi, Rin;
Iida, Ojiro, Shinso, Shoji, Tokoyami, Mineta, Yaoyorozu, Hatsume;
Slytherins:
Kaibara, Kamakiri, Kuroiro, Monoma;
Jiro, Todoroki;
So, fun facts I guess;
-The hat took an hot minute to decide where to put Monoma, it was very very conflicted.
-Bakugo could've gone in either Gryffondor or Slytherin, but Katsuki was VERY adamant he'd go in Gryffondor, and the hat is too old to be torn to shreds because of an hissy 11 year old.
-Hatsume was sorted into Ravenclaw the second the hat touched the tips of her hair, Malfoy style.
-Todoroki was sorted into Slytherin because you should picture him how he was at the start of the series. He chilled out afterwards.
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caterpillarinacave · 19 days ago
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nothing like a corporate american retail job to crush your soul like a grape
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trashcanwithsprinkles · 1 year ago
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Ive seenyou mention wuxia a few times now and i wonder what that is. Would you mind explaining it to me?
not the most qualified person to explain this as i'm not, in fact, from china; but i've read a couple of wuxia so here goes:
wuxia is a genre of fiction from china specifically, about martial artists in ancient china. i don't think a specific time period is like required? obviously some dynasties are more popular but idk how it goes in that front. it just has to be Not Today and probably Too Long Ago. like pre industral revolution i think. again idk if that's a requirement, but most i've seen are from around the same relative murky pre-electricity era.
xianxia is a subgenre of wuxia that's specifically more fantasy-like, and it's not just martial arts, but also spiritual powers and cultivation (which i have no fucking clue how to explain without two hours and three tangents other than chinese magic system. if you've ever heard of chi/qi as an energy, it appears there). so like- genshin is by all accounts a xianxia, it just doesn't use the more common specific xianxia terms like cultivation. some of those are very weird to translate and probably not common for the average non-wuxia reader, so it makes sense why they're going for alternatives.
chongyun and xingqiu and xianyun are very much straight out of a xianxia. xianyun's entire story quest was the closest genshin has gotten to a straight xianxia plot so far. i highly reccomend ashikai's video on unnecessary visions if you want more info on why genshin is a xianxia hahah
cyanide narwhal has some talk of some stuff from xianxia, but that's mostly because well- fucking liyue, that's how it works there. the whole light energy striking down someone who's getting powerful and giving them godhood if they survive the strike is, while not exactly like that, something that happens in some xianxia as well. like the way adepti work in general is just very xianxia. ashikai does a much better job explaining it than i do tbh but yeah
TL;DR: wuxia is chinese martial arts fiction in ancient china, and xianxia is a wuxia subgenre with more magic elements. also genshin is a xianxia
#i was going to recomend some xianxia if you're curious but like#genuinely don't know which one is a good starting point#like i'm tempted to say just dive headfirst into mdzs like most of us did but like#is mdzs the best place to start if you know nothing? unsure#genuinely#given how it's made to feel more lighthearted and formatted more like it's a fucking videogame#svsss might be a good launching pad#but tbf it's been a while since i read it#also it has unskippable sex scenes (i think??) so like- if you don't want to read that you're kind of out of luck there#not that mdzs doesn't have that either but they're not literally Plot Relevant. like the plot does not hinge on their horizontal tango#there's probably a good wuxia to start out there but i can't really remember right now#like mdzs is the easiest to recomend bc it's trial by fire and you're going to come out of the other end knowing like 80% of it all#plus it's not nearly as traumatizing as some of the other options#and it's so easily accessible it's almost funny#like take your pick: novel. live action. animation. audio drama. comic#it's fucking everywhere and the fandom is fucking huge so that's a giant plus#but that doesn't change the fact that idk if you can watch a couple episodes to get a feel for the wuxia genre. like would that work??#so i guess i'll leave that to everyone else to comment with any recomendations if they have a good one#for like an introductory work#or just decide mdzs is just the easiest point of entry. that can always be it. i mean we all made it anyway
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paging-possum · 1 year ago
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hm. might fuck around and draw some other peoples ocs just for funsies when I have time its a nice change of pace from what I usually do
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bmpmp3 · 5 months ago
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post ankle-twisting clarity
#i slipped in the mudddddd the other day LOL i twisted my one ankle and scraped up my other knee#so the past few days ive just been kind of needing to waddle around.....#LUCKILY its healing well and fast <3 but yknow i was like#so stressed out over shit that doesnt matter in school. and like this is an awful unintentional habit i have but i will get like#overly stressed over shit and then i'll start getting SUPER careless with everything. and then i'll injure myself foolishly and Calm Down#happened last year with my foolish midnight woodcarving incident LOL its always november....#BUT yeah luckily this years foolish injury is a quick one at least!!#but yeah like genuinely i was so stressed out about all my fine arts major shit. teachers have been really getting on my case recently#my main professor said that it was a good thing people get so riled up with my work because it means its impactful#tbh i didnt believe her at all i thought she was just trying to placate me but then i listened closely to the things faculty say when#they look at my fucking. cartoon wolf drawing or something and i think. she might be right actually. people keep getting frustrated with me#because i think they see a lot of potential in me but i basically only have to drive to draw cartoon wolves etc HFKJSDHJVKRFEds#which is great for my ego. maybe too good for my ego. that my mark making and colour use etc is so evocative to these industry and#instutition people. but on the other hand i was told like thrice now that my work has no place in a gallery. which is fine although im not#totally sure how true that is. but also afterwards one time i was suggested to go into animation instead which is. um.#so its not out of nowhere i mean i did want to be an animator when i was like 10 but if you know anything about the current state of the#animation industry its like genuinely wild to tell someone who you've only seen 2 dimensional watercolour and acrylic painted#sketchy lined drawings from and who has said they cant do digital art anymore that they should get an animation degree?#brother they would kill me. i would be killed. i had an inkling but it really made me notice so clearly how limited the experiences my#faculty kind of have with certain industries. which is fine. or maybe not. for a professor LOL but yknow. but i was like huh. i guess i can#just kind of chill lol if i just keep doing things maybe something will come of it. i may not get as much help in my artistic development#rn as i would like. but its chill i think i'll figure it out if i just keep doing stuff <3#doesnt really matter that my teachers dont know what to do with me. my kneeeee has a booboo so i am CHILLING out :)
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naamahdarling · 1 year ago
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#my psych who prescribes my psych meds is a resident and is moving on in a couple of months#i don't even remember the names of them all at this point#this happens over and over and I cannot find a clinic that will put me with someone who intends to stay#thst will also prescribe my adhd meds#and my anxiety meds#and the real kicker is that twice now they have LIED about it and said they would#only to reveal after all the hoop-jumping that oops sorry they didn't really mean it#so it's a risk i have to take any time i leave#and rhen there's the issue of new people almost always wanting to DO something#but instead of talking to me about it they just decide that my meds need overhauling and pressure me to go off shit that works#but that they morally object to i guess#and my psych for some stupid reason has decided she wants bloodwork for my cholesterol and blood sugar stuff and im just like#what hell does THIS presage because if she harasses me about the results or tries to put me on drugs for that#I'll give her a nasty scrap about it#im not interested in those meds at all#and im certainly not messing with my diet since food is the only pleasure i get most days and even that is marginal at best#and removing that would just make me worse#but medpros for the most part really don't give a fuck about that#and so now im afraid - because i do not and cannot trust them - that if i disapprove of the meds they will retaliate somehow#which good luck proving that when management and oversight often don't even care if they course of treatment will HARM you#if it relates to being fat or having bad numbers#they just gotta pathologize!#so yeah im sick of everything and just kind of want to bury myself in a bog forever#i shouldn't have to deal with this
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orcelito · 7 months ago
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Actually, on the topic of the baby fever. God it's so frustrating. Bc when I was like 14 ish I was Adamant that I never ever wanted kids. And my dad said smth around the lines of "that'll likely change" (probably from his own experience with this) and I was like NO. it WONT.
And then eventually, age 21-22 ish, I admitted that Okay, I still don't want to have my own kids, but someday maybe I'll adopt...
And Now, 27 years old, I got the general baby fever on occasion. It Did fucking change. And I don't know if I actually WILL bother with having my own kid (I still don't want to go through the hassle and massive body changes). But god. I do see a fucking baby and feel that stab of longing. It's almost like my damned hormones betrayed me or smth. Maddening!
I shall simply write fanfic about it.
#speculation nation#pregnancy ment/#honestly though i hadnt felt the wish to have my own until after my dad died#and i realized just how small our family is getting. and just felt this stab of NEED. to continue the line. continue the family.#my family's fucking dying around me i need to add to it. need more family. yknow?#so i dont actually know if this is. because of hormones or because of grief or What#but it was enough for me to put the hysterectomy idea on hold. bc id been genuinely considering it back in like. april? or so.#but then this happened and now im like. fuck dude. i dont know. but the uncertainty's enough to keep me from doing it.#yeah i dont wanna deal with periods anymore. but also. i need more time to decide.#i think no matter what i do want to raise kids someday. once im more stable (financially and emotionally)#but whether thats adoption or putting myself thru fuckin body torture. well i'll just have to decide. later.#maybe the deciding factor will be my own body aging lol. if i wait too long. my body will decide for me. who knows!#i Have thought about what id do if i got accidentally pregnant. especially relevant back when i was sleeping with a trans woman#and used to be id abort no hesitation. but well. i mean abortions illegal here anyways rn so id have to go to another state#but if i decided it i could make it work. it's not That far of a trip.#but. when i thought about it. the concern was less about the theoretical baby. and more about finishing school.#thinking 'man itd be fucking awful to finish school if i got pregnant right now'. but not. hesitating over the baby.#if i was out of school and relatively stable and i got accidentally pregnant. then. well. Maybe.#so me doing my dad vash au where he gets accidentally pregnant and goes all in with it#thats me. sorting out my feelings on it i guess. putting them somewhere.#idk. it's a lot to think about. i dont want to condemn a child to my genetic problems. but at the same time...#i dont know. To Be Decided Later.
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hellohoihey · 4 months ago
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Like I feel kinda shit for it but I truly do not have the energy to figure out based on fcking posts of someone's Instagram likes and like. The fucking actions of people they support to figure out whether it's "okay" to like them like I just can't
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