#i guess i just always know their support and love has been real and they’re like that with everyone not just me

[heartbreakfeelsogood]

i don’t care how many notes a gif set gets i only feel as if i won when it get tags like this and kell never disappoints <3 @ybcpatrick pls never stop

[checkeredflagggs]

Footnote of a Story

pairing: logan sargeant x famous!fem!singer

summary: Logan and his girlfriend have been together for over 10 years — people have posted about it 8 times

a/n: this is canon to the story of us story, just some backstory that probably won’t be talked about in the main story at all

a/n2: I fiddled about with the timeline of the Covid quarantine — namely that it was already happening by Valentine’s Day

a/n3: I also don’t know when Oscar and Lily started dating so here it’s when they’re 16

Masterlist | Taglist

10 Years Old

y/ns_mother

liked by sargeant1, l/n1, sargeant2, and 183 others

y/ns_mother: well it looks like y/n has a crush…she was very determined to make “the bestest card ever and make sure it’s the good candy mom!”

view all comments

sargeant1: logan was the same way…he nearly talked me into buying a bouquet bigger then is he for her

↳y/ns_mother: they’re so adorable

↳sargeant1: they really are

sargeant2: oh young love…

↳l/n1: i guess when you know you know…doesn’t matter the age…i guess

↳sargeant2: they are very cute together

randocousin: giving us all old timers a bad name 😹

↳drunkaunt: bah they won’t last…once they get to the real world…nothing ever lasts…

↳rudecousin: just cause your marriage failed doesn’t mean theirs will. You’re just a mean old drunk

↳randocousin: not this shit again…

not_y/n: not_logan I told you — I knew very young that you were the one for me

↳not_logan: I won’t doubt you again babe

↳not_y/n: I don’t know why you doubted me in the first place ngl liked by not_logan

not_oscar: oh so you guys have always been this grossly in love

↳not_y/n: booo you grinch liked by not_logan, not_lilyz

12 Years Old

y/n_mother

liked by l/n1, drunkaunt, weirduncle, sargeant3, 212 others

y/ns_mother: we might have a little baker on our hands…y/n was adamant that she had to cook these cookies all by herself

view all comments

l/n1: she didn’t even let me have one…

sargeant3: logan was beaming when he came home with these…

↳y/ns_mother: I’m not going to tell them of course…but we’ve started a little wedding fund for them

↳sargeant3: so have we. It’s very obvious where this is going to go

↳y/ns_mother: oh I can’t wait…

drunkaunt: their still together??

↳rudecousin: they’re*

↳rudecousin: and they are! Shockingly relationships can last longer then the hangover the next day

↳drunkaunt: do not start something with me…you weren’t they’re for it

↳rudecousin: there*

↳randocousin: must you rudecousin?

↳rudecousin: she makes it so easy!

↳drunkaunt: your a mean little man

↳randocousin: don’t

↳rudecousin: …you’re drunkaunt

not_logan: I didn’t know you baked those!

↳not_y/n: yeah that was the last time I attempted that

↳not_y/n: not pictured was my mom’s destroyed kitchen…liked by not_logan

14 Years Old

y/n privated a post

liked by y/ns_mother, sister, logansargeant, oscarpiastri, and 469 others

tagged: logansargeant

y/n: 💜💜 he got me a card!

view all comments

logansargeant: I always get you a card!

↳y/n: I know but now I can post it for everyone to see!

y/ns_mother: oh to see you guys now…4 years strong

↳y/n: moooooommm go be embarrassing on your own post

oscarpiastri: so you’re the reason he couldn’t stop looking at his phone?

↳y/n: I am! And you are?

↳logansargeant: y/n this is one of my friends from karting! Meet Oscar — he’s the Australian

↳y/n: hi Australian Oscar!

↳oscarpiastri: don’t you mean best friend logansargeant?

↳y/n: HE DOES NOT CAUSE THATS ME!!

↳logansargeant: my best karting friend but the best friend spot has always been hers liked by y/n

16 Years Old

not_logan

liked by not_y/n, not_oscar, not_lilyz, and 392 others

tagged: not_y/n

not_logan: a small day spent together before someone goes off on a national tour!

Congrats baby — I’m so fucking proud of you 🩵🩵

view all comments

not_y/n: thank you babe! For both the day and for the constant support you’ve given me over the years

↳not_logan: always!

not_oscar: congrats again on the tour y/n!

↳not_y/n: thanks osc! And lmk if you can make any of the dates — I’ll get you tickets

↳not_oscar: oh Logan already has it all planned out

↳not_y/n: awwww

y/ns_mother: oh I’m so proud of you two

↳not_y/n: mom please…

↳not_logan: thanks mum l/n!

↳not_y/n: don’t encourage her!

not_lilyz: oh you guys are so cute!

↳not_y/n: thanks Lily!

↳not_y/n: and thanks again for making a private account

↳not_lilyz: oh that’s not a problem — and is probably good planning for the future

↳not_oscar:😳😳

yoursister: haven’t heard from drunkaunt in a while…she ok?

↳rudecousin: still drunk and mean

↳not_y/n: it’s just neither Logan or I friended her — in fact I blocked her on this account 😂

↳yoursister: good call

18 Years Old

not_y/n

liked by not_logan, y/ns_mother, not_oscar, not_lilyz, and 273 others

tagged: not_logan

not_y/n: awwwweee… my baby surprised me back in Florida. Thank you for coming home to me for Valentine’s Day

view all comments

not_logan: glad I managed to catch you before you leave me again 😔

↳not_y/n: nooooo I’m so sorry baby

↳not_y/n: you say the word and I’ll pack you up in my suitcase and take you everywhere with me

↳not_logan: …I’m not there yet but I’ll let you know

y/ns_mother: oh I’m so glad you managed to catch her…with my handwriting I wasn’t sure if she left the 13th or the 18th…

↳not_logan: thanks for all your help mum l/n!

↳not_y/n: thanks for helping him surprise me mama

↳y/ns_mother: of course baby

not_oscar: I don’t think that’s part of your diet Logan…

↳not_lilyz: like you haven’t cheated on yours a hundred times in the last month…

↳not_oscar: 😑😑

↳not_y/n: have I mentioned I love you recently lily?? liked by not_lilyz

rudecousin: heads up — drunkaunt spotted this over my shoulder and started a rant while going for her keys

↳not_y/n: …I’m gonna go start my tour early…

↳not_logan: I’m gonna head back to England real fast

↳yoursister: cowards

↳not_y/n: yup

↳not_logan: absolutely

20 Years Old

not_logan

liked by not_y/n, not_oscar, not_lilyz, and 231 others

tagged: not_y/n

not_logan: fun activities to do while locked up during Valentine’s Day…

view all comments

not_y/n: we’re gonna be cooking champs by the time this ends 💪🏻

↳not_logan: I love you so much but I really hope we’re not locked up that long…

↳not_y/n: 🥺🥺🥺

↳not_logan: again I love you so much but we burned water yesterday…

↳not_y/n: ok that’s fair

↳not_oscar: how???

↳not_y/n: we’re simply that talented

↳not_logan: we got distracted 😉😉

↳not_oscar: ewww I don’t need to know that liked by not_y/n, not_logan

y/ns_mother: oh I hope you guys are doing ok…I’d be there for you if I could…love you guys…

↳not_y/n: we’re doing ok mama!!

↳not_logan: …we’re not dead yet but our lack of kitchen skills are becoming more evident…

↳y/ns_mother: oh no…don’t worry baby…I’ll get yoursister to help me video you…I’ll teach you to cook…

↳not_y/n: thank you mama 🙏🙏

not_lilyz: ok so I’m a little jealous…

↳not_y/n: awwww lily we miss you!

↳not_lilyz: miss you guys too

↳not_oscar: 🤨

↳not_lilyz: …their food looks so much better than yours

↳not_y/n: at least you guys can cook something — ours is just anything we could cut into a heart shape… liked by not_lilyz, not_oscar

bandmember: you guys are so cute…

↳not_y/n: thank you 😊

↳not_y/n: also check your mail…there might be something for you…😈😈😈

↳bandmember2: oh???????

sargeant4: how’s the weather over there?

↳not_logan: 😑🙄 cold and snowy

↳not_logan: not that we can see any of it…

↳not_y/n: it could be worse!

↳not_logan: how?

↳not_y/n: we could be stuck in your apartment and not my house

↳not_logan: …that’s true I guess

22 Years Old

logansargeant posted a story, not_y/n posted a story

[thank you to my girl! 🩵🩵🩵][oh Logan my love…an ocean apart and yet you spoil me so…]

user1 replied A GIRL?!? Logan Sargeant do you have a girlfriend!

user2 replied GIRLFRIEND???

georgerussell63 replied oh that’s cute!

oscarpiastri replied maybe I need to tag Lily in this…

↳logansargeant oh she’s already seen it

↳oscarpiastri 🫣😨

↳logansargeant didn’t know you wanted flowers and presents though…

↳oscarpiastri who doesn’t…

oscarpiastri replied you guys keep setting the bar high

↳not_y/n gotta get on my level osc

↳oscarpiastri 🙄

lilyzneimer replied brb going to make Oscar take notes…

↳not_y/n he said pretty much the same thing…

↳lilyzneimer 🤣🤣

yoursister replied you guys are literally the only reason I believe in love still

↳not_y/n awww babes it’ll happen for you soon

↳yoursister maybe sooner than you think…

↳not_y/n oh???

y/ns_mother replied oh your young love…

↳not_y/n he’s the one mama

↳y/ns_mother oh baby I know…I’ve known for over a decade now…

↳not_y/n 🥰🥰🥰

25 Years Old (after the Story of Us)

y/n

liked by logansargeant, oscarpiastri, lilyzneimer and 12,697,283 others

tagged: logansargeant

y/n: You can hear it in the silence, You can feel it on the way home, You are in love, true love

view all comments

user3: oh my god so lovely!

user4: Logan Sargeant I wasn’t familiar with your game…

lilymhe: oh my god did Logan get you all that?

↳y/n: he did! He’s a real romantic

↳lilymhe: awww 🥺

↳lilymhe: alex_albon take notes please

↳alex_albon: oh no

↳oscarpiastri: oh this is very common

↳oscarpiastri: get used to it. They’ve been like this since they were 10

↳user5: shut up that’s so cute

oscarpiastri: please stop

↳logansargeant: I will not.

↳y/n: you just gotta do better

↳oscarpiastri: I try but you guys keep raising the bar

↳y/n: skill issue

↳user6: you can tell you guys have been friends for a while…

↳y/n: about 10 years now!

Taglist

@anamiad00msday @suns3treading @daniskywalkersolo @awritingtree @justheretoreadthxxs @coral7161 @lost4lyrics @mastermindbaby @freyathehuntress @angelluv16 @nichmeddar @mxm47max @Voidvannie @justaf1girl @theendofthematerialgworl @a-beaverhausen @tallrock35 @elizamoe133 @imlonelydontsendhelp @jessica3478

[specialgradefckr]

Heatwave: Day 6

tw: explicit content. 9k+ words. Satoru/Reader. female!omega!reader, alpha!gojo. mutual pining, light angst, YEARNING, so much yearning, PIV, heat/rut sex, minor breeding kink, choking, reader and gojo are switches, gojo is kind of a masochist. intense bickering. you and gojo are both pathetically whipped and in love, and i do mean pathetic

Prompt: Mating cycles are as violent as they are horny, intent to kill is high.

It took some convincing to get you a position as a teacher at Tokyo Jujutsu High School – plenty of traditional fools in charge who thought omegas were better as childbearers than sorcerers.

But you got there. After ten years teaching in public schools, teaching at Tokyo Jujutsu High was what you'd always wanted: small classes with dedicated students who you could form real bonds with.

As a sorcerer, you had the potential to become a special grade – but your true passion was teaching, and it was a far better use of your talents to help the newest sorcerers improve.

Other teachers weren’t quite as gifted in the art of passing on knowledge. Like the special grade sorcerer no one ever shut up about, Satoru Gojo.

He was seven years younger than you – practically a student himself. But somehow, here he was, a teacher alongside you. Nepotism, maybe, combined with how obviously alpha he was – freakishly tall, well-built, and unnervingly confident, used to getting his way.

You’re not certain of his credentials as a teacher. If he has any at all.

If you were forced to guess, you’d assume Gojo had at least a PhD in pissing you the fuck off.

“Awh, c’mon now,” He’d snickered at your implication. “Like it’s hard?”

You could kill him. Actually, cross that out – you will kill him, just as soon as you’re finished riding his stupid big, fat knot to absolute oblivion.

Alphas, for all their pride, are even dumber and hornier than omegas in heat once their rut kicks into high gear and they lock their knot into someone.

You’ll choke him out then, you plan – if that doesn’t just make him roll all six eyes in exaggerated pleasure.

Gojo’s just that kind of complete and utter brat. Even if he is an alpha.

Constantly stalking you from behind, ready to throw his arms around your shoulders in some lazy half-embrace. Lording his stupid height over you, his seemingly endless youthful energy.

“Hey~” He’d drawl, leaning into you, knowing exactly how much the action exposed his scent, “How’s it going with the students? Teach ‘em any new tricks?”

You weren’t some early-twenties dewy-eyed omega; his scent didn’t have any more effect on you than a nice cologne would have. “Yes, I think today went well. They’re bright kids, I’m proud of them.”

“Oho! We should celebrate your success!” Not pleased with your response, he’d squeezed your shoulders close, enough that you couldn’t walk away. “Drinks on me! Let’s head out~”

“Hitting on older women?” You’d returned, shrugging him off so you could walk away, “What, have you successfully repulsed every potential mate of your own age group? Quite a feat, even for you, Gojo.”

“Awh, don’t be like that. I’m just trying to show my support! I know ladies your age tend to get a lot of flak these days, especially from the higher-ups…”

It had been a pretty low blow from him, considering how much he disliked the higher-ups and tradition as a whole. Looking back, that was probably him getting desperate for some kind of reaction.

Like a fool, you’d given it to him.

Spinning, whipping around to tuck your finger beneath his chin, just tickling at his neck, inches from his scent glands.

“Ladies my age don’t go for boys like you, Satoru-kun,” you purr, snatching his chin and pulling his pretty face closer to yours, “And I’ll have you know, I have no interest one-night stands.”

He grins that awful, gorgeous grin with those pretty sparkling eyes. “Now when did I say I wanted anything like that? You’ve got a dirty mind there. I just wanted to get drinks.”

“When did I say you did?” You hold his gaze like you would the leash of a particularly disobedient dog. “I was just letting you know. But since you just want to get some celebratory drinks, I’ll ask Shoko and Nanami to come along.”

Heh. Transparent disappointment flashes across his face, like he’s bitten into a lemon, but he’s quick to brighten up.

“My mistake, I got a little too excited~” He follows alongside you with his stupidly long stride, hands in his pockets, “I was just soooo~ happy to hear you don’t do one-night stands. I’d get super jealous!”

This he says, right after taunting you for suggesting he wanted one? What a little shit.

“Do you also recall the part where I said I wasn’t interested in little boys?” You mutter, texting Shoko and Nanami about the meetup.

You can still feel his presence behind you. Pheromones drifting through your awareness. Gojo’s got such a weird scent for an alpha. Artificial and sour and sweet. Blue raspberry. Electric, just a whiff of it tingles. You lick your lips.

“Yeah, I heard you. Good to know my darling kohai Nanami is safe from your clutches~” He sings.

Fucking insufferable.

-

The thing about alphas was that they got aggressive when their ruts came around.

From experience you’d known his limitless could be turned on and off at will, and he could allow his scent to drift through it.

Not only was Gojo nearing his rut, he wanted you to know that he was nearing his rut. The air is oozing with his stinging, cloying scent that makes your mouth water. You have to swallow your spit a few times.

So when Gojo insisted that you spar with him, you just knew it was going to fucking suck.

He was going to use it to force unnecessary contact, shove his scent in your face, taunt and tease you while he physically prevented you from leaving.

Then, the million dollar question. Why the fuck did you ever agree to it?

Deep down, you tell yourself it’s to shut his stupid ass up. Because it’ll make for good practice, and that’s not even a lie. Or even just because he’s got a pretty face, and you want eye candy.

You tell yourself it has nothing to do with the heat you know you’re just on the verge of.

Nothing to do with the rut that has him smelling absolutely delectable.

The adrenaline that bursts through your veins as he races towards you is purely from the thrill of combat.

The exhilaration of watching his strike swing through empty air, the slight shock on his face; that’s because you’re proud of your skills.

You’re not panting, teeth bared in an awful grin, arms tightening back to grab him and hold him down, make him yours yours all yours – this is a combat stance.

Not that you wanted to fight him that badly in the first place. Feel his strikes against yours, touch that infinity for yourself. See what he’s offering, that he likes to throw it in your face so much.

It’s not any of that, and you whip out a denial for each thought as it rises like you dodge Gojo’s strikes with increasing desperation. Fast. Fast, so fast, like a blink. Here one moment, there the next.

Focus. On him. White hair, black tracksuit, that little flash of blue you’d see anywhere. You pin your senses on him, on the scent that dances in the air, tempting you. Put every fiber of your being into matching his strikes, which come faster, and faster, until eventually even you can’t dodge them.

White hair. Blue eyes. Pink lips. Pretty, pale face. Pressure down against you, breath, scent, hot in your face. Focus, focus.

Anything to take your attention from the way your thighs want to clench together when he pins you down, nose brushing against yours.

Close enough no infinity could stop you if you wanted to lean forward into the neck showing under his collar and bi-

“You goin’ easy on me?” He practically purrs in your ear. Infuriating.

So you let yourself purr back. Take in his pheromones for just a second, lean into it, relaxing underneath him as you let off an answering scent, laced with the arousal you’re already feeling. Tongue darting between your lips for a moment as you let your eyes linger on his pretty mouth, pretty face.

Gojo’s eyes dilate as your lashes flutter, tilting your lips to –

SLAM

“No,” You sing to his crumpled form, hunched over from the blow to his middle, “I think you’re easy, Gojo. Come back when you’re not a horny little beast about to rut.”

A breathy chuckle comes from him as he situates himself to sit back on his heels, catching his breath.

Unnerving. Everything about this bastard is unnerving. The way he looks up at you, face flushed, grinning with delight – you know for a fact your strike hit hard enough to bruise. Maybe he could heal it, but he was still winded from the impact. It had to hurt, still.

Instead, those too-blue eyes seem to glow at you.

“Easy, huh?” He says, and you pretend he said it to himself. “Actually, I’m pretty hard.”

(You try very hard to pretend you didn’t hear that. To pretend you couldn’t smell it the moment you struck him.)

He licks his lips, taking in a deep breath, like he caught the scent of something he can’t let escape him. Eyes staring after you.

You walk away, before he can catch on to how slick you’ve become, just with this little interaction. What are you, a teenager? Maybe you’re close to your heat, but not that close.

Gojo lets you walk.

You think he knows.

(He definitely knows.)

-

He loves to taunt you. Alphas love posturing, looking for fights, as soon as their ruts come around. But an omega nearing their heat would snap at anything that so much as breathed wrong. Ready to see everything as a threat, demanding and critical even of those closest to them.

Both secondary genders had… attitude problems during their mating cycles that led to them lashing out. But due to stereotypes, alphas were seen as being dominant and argumentative, whereas omegas were seen as…

“Awh, needy, are we? Must be your heat coming up, huh?”

“Still hitting on older women? Your rut must really have you acting like an animal. Why don’t you do us all a favor and find someone to fuck it out with?” God, just talking about it is fucking annoying.

“Not very mature of you to say, ma’am!” The look you gave him must have spoken volumes, because he immediately responded, “It’s okay, I know how it is. You don’t have to be so shy about admitting it! What omega wouldn’t want a strong, handsome alpha like me to take care of them~?”

“Kill yourself.”

Satoru Gojo had pried words from your mouth you would otherwise be horrified by. And that wasn’t even the worst of it.

The worst of it was he would try to pamper you, just like he claimed you must have needed.

And the worst of that part was that it fucking worked.

He knew all your favorite drinks, snacks, meals. Had things delivered to your desk when even his own moronic self could understand you did not want to see him – always with traces of his scent lingering on the gift.

Papers to grade? Coffee from your favorite café, just the way you liked it.

Indoor from a long training session? Something iced and fruity to sip on.

Back from a stressful mission? A dessert so delectable you double-check to see if Gojo hadn’t already taken a bite out of it himself.

“A little pick me up after all your hard work~ The students always talk about how much they love you. Trying to steal my thunder, huh? Good job, sensei!”

The words are irrationally pleasing to read. And he smells good, it always smells too fucking good, refreshing at the first hint and then invigorating the next. Sweet and sour, just like the bastard himself.

There’s little bits. A ribbon, a traditional little lunch wrapped in a handkerchief, one time he even just shamelessly sets his coat down next to a drink with another note.

“By the way, my favorite jacket got stained while getting you this. Since it’s your fault, you can dry clean it for me, right? Make sure to give it back, I’d miss it so much!”

Awful. Awful terrible man. Giving you every excuse in the book to hoard his scent and pretend you hadn’t. You could be throwing these away, for all he knows. Out of pure spite.

(He knows. He must know that you can’t throw them away, your instincts scream at you, your heat aches and burns. Each little article you get to squirrel away allows you another night of easier rest. He knows it. You know he does.)

It’s infuriating. It’s absolutely fucking infuriating because you know Gojo doesn’t mean it like that. He’s just using this to get to you. Doesn’t want anything more than to fuck the closest and most convenient hole because his rut is coming up. He isn’t pursuing a relationship with you, this isn’t courting, just teasing.

It’d amuse him, too, after. To tease you about it, probably try some weird shit in the classrooms or on missions – he’s got that air about him. Slutty. Down for anything.

It’s infuriating and it’s fucking hot. And devastating, because you meant it when you said you don’t really do one-night stands.

He’s just so unreasonably pretty that you’d thought about it when you met him. The attraction is there, on both ends, but the more you’ve gotten to know him the more certain you are that it’s a bad idea.

Gojo’s a menace already, and as fun as it was to taunt him, having sex with him would just give him more ammunition. He made everything weird.

All the teasing, the uncomfortable chemistry, the not-courting shit, and you’re in heat. Sure, you’d had casual sex before, but during your heat? Fuck that shit.

Because unfortunately, Gojo is right. You get needy.

Not because you’re an omega. It’s because you’re you.

When you spend your heat with a partner it’s like you can’t stop everything from spilling out.

The desire to know and be known in your entirety. To feel and touch and cherish every inch laid bare, to gift yourself like a sacrament to someone who you know will worship you –

See? Unbearably romantic. And you love it, you eat that shit up. It’s deep in you, a wanting you don’t even wish to deny.

The thought of waking up to an empty bed during your heat drove you mad with loathing and heartbreak. Seeing the person you’d allowed to have you in your heat touching someone else? You’d be out for blood.

Alphas get territorial. If an alpha sees someone with their partner, they’re liable to rip the interloper to shreds.

Omegas get possessive. An omega wouldn’t care about someone coveting what's theirs, but they’ll rip that partner to shreds if they suspect they have eyes for another.

It’s funny, how all that nurturing and devotion can turn so easily into equal parts cruelty and violence. To love deeply is to hate deeply, and adoration is so intrinsic to your being that you can’t help but fall hard whenever desire takes you.

You’re a needy little monster, craving love, gentleness, affection. You wouldn’t survive whatever he did after, you might not even survive baring yourself to him, letting the extent of your desire be known.

Gojo would rip your poor, tender, beating heart from your chest. Chew it up and spit it out like trash.

And he’s so, so pretty, and he smells so good, and you love the excitement of your back and forth – you adore him, this Satoru Gojo. You want him so bad you can taste it. But Gojo doesn’t feel it like you do, like a need deep in his bones that aches all the way to his dreams.

You’re seven years his senior, have no exceptional qualities, and he’s got all the options in the world. Gojo’s still so young. There’s no reason for him to want to be tied to you. If he fantasizes at all, it’s about fucking you, knotting you, not of your teeth on his neck or his own on yours.

And you shouldn’t even entertain the idea of him fantasizing about you. You shouldn’t entertain any of these thoughts, because for all the violence your love can inflict on him, Gojo is the one who would emerge unscathed. You’d be left in tatters, and he wouldn’t even have the decency not to step all over them.

You can’t sleep with him. You’ll die, you’ll surely die, it’ll absolutely feel like you’re dying to see that pretty face smile sarcastically, or sneer and turn away. You’ll awaken without his warmth beside you and it’ll feel like your heart is missing from your chest and you’ll have to be reminded of that every time you see him because you work with that fucking nuisance. At your job.

You can’t do it. You can’t. Off limits, no way.

But you’re (regrettably, unfortunately, miserably) needy when you’re in heat. And Gojo is a horny little beast in his rut.

And he knows, he knows he fucking knows. He’s there whenever you turn a corner, walk up to a vending machine, sit down to grade papers. He’s got that awful million watt smile that lights up his entire stupid pretty face when he flirts with you, trades barbs back and forth.

He’s touchy, too touchy, gets too close. Asks to spar with you again and again until you say yes. Leaves you more treats, more drinks, more little gifts the whole while.

Your hands get dry because your heat wakes you up in the middle of the night, you have to touch yourself constantly. Gojo brings you lotion that smells like raspberries (like him).

You’re not entirely sure he hasn’t fucked around and filled the bottle with lotion that’s also laced with his cum. You use it anyways. His reaction makes it obvious that he can tell you have, and he’s pleased by it.

You hate him. You hate him, and you want him. You want him so fucking bad.

You can’t do this. You can’t do it.

Gojo looks at you like he wants to eat you. Like he’s tracking every little twitch, every movement, like a predator and his prey. Like he’s waiting for you to bolt off so he can give chase.

You can’t do this.

You’re not fucking prey. You’ll bite him back, doesn’t this stupid man know?

And he spars with you again and you’re left breathless from dodging him –

(you refuse to be touched by someone who is himself untouchable)

And he smells so so so good up close when he finally tackles you, seizes you, locks your arms up from behind you –

(you love to be held, you dream of being held, in the depths of your heat it’s not being filled that comforts you it’s the thought of pressure like a vice grasping you so close, unwilling to let go)

And his face is so devastatingly beautiful up close, those terrible, magnificent eyes like a sea of stars, staring at you like he’s enraptured –

(god, he’s so pretty, just looking at him has a little dose of glee shooting through you)

And his lips taste as good as he smells –

(sweet and sour, can it really be that bad if the sting is all washed away with the tingle of sugary, electric tang on your tongue)

And he holds you so so tight so close so warm –

(you’re pulsing, aching, throbbing, and you’re so fucking tired of your own fingers and he’s grinding against you so good)

And then you’re in your room, at your door, inches away from your nest with all the shameful little bits and pieces of his scent you’ve stolen away.

(you can’t do this. this man will kill you. he will be the death of you.)

Teeth on your collarbone, huge hands clawing at your shirt, pulling it up. You look down at him, meet his fevered eyes and lust-filled gaze.

His breaths ghost over the skin he’s left wet with kisses and nips. Hungry, so hungry for you. So pretty. You grasp his pretty face with both hands and pull him up into a kiss that’s more teeth than lips.

(You’ll go out fighting.)

When his tongue darts into your mouth you nearly moan at the taste of him. Gojo groans, and he does it openly, hands wide over your ass and clenching at it. You close your teeth against his tongue, not hard, not biting. Just to feel it. Measuring the give.

Gojo nicks himself on your teeth to pull away, a sparkle in his eyes.

“Knew you wanted me.”  He pants, licking over your lips, “Wanted this. Could smell you.” Lick, lick. “Taste you.”

Fuck. His eyes are wild and eager and you can smell his arousal already dripping free from him. Slotting one of your legs between his lets you press up and confirm his hardness. He moans at it, purposefully loud.

Massive. He’s massive, hard, and aching for you, so much he nearly howls at the pressure. Clawing your clothes off of you. You’re no better, yanking off his jacket, tugging his shirt up – and he lets you – tossing them into your bed.

“Look at you,” Kiss, kiss, he steals the words between presses of his mouth on your skin, like he has to breathe you and not the air, “Look at that sweet little nest. Helped you with it, didn’t I? Aren’t I just the greatest alpha?”

It’s hard, so fucking hard, to ignore how delight laces through your chest at his words. This nest, this place where you’ve languished for too long already in your heat, now an alpha (your alpha) is here and happy to fill it up (fill you up), curl up in it with you.

“You’re talking too much,” is all you dare to let yourself voice.

You seize his pants and underwear by the waistband, dragging them down his hips. Gojo stumbles, undignified, towards you, but even then, he’s tall enough to press you to fall back into the strategic mess of blankets, pillows, and your hoarded pieces of his offerings.

He’s still grinning as he pins you down. Arms on either side of you. Tall, so tall, so much larger than you. Larger than life. Your beautiful, ferocious alpha, all hard and excited just for you.

“Too bad. I love talking.” Gojo’s eyes stay trained on yours as he mouths over a breast, sucking as much of it as he can into his mouth.

“No, really? Would never have guessed.” the grumble escapes you, and he giggles.

He watches you still, tense, and try not to lean into the sensation as he plays at your nipple with his tongue, teeth. Pulls away with a pop.

You hear him kicking off what remains of his clothes, but you can’t bring yourself to look down.

“I can smell your slick from here,” A hand tracing up the inside of your thigh, “Mouthwatering.”

So wet you can almost feel yourself gushing. His hands are inches away from it. Heavy, warm form bearing down on you as he moves to suck at your other breast. Teasing fingers where your leg joins to your body.

“Is that all your mouth’s good for?”

His laughter had been far too mocking to be endearing, just like his grip on your hips had been just a bit tighter than pleasant, his grin wide enough to be smug instead of sweet.

Wretched and traitorous, your heart lurches at his beautiful face, anyways.

“If you wanted me to show you,” Those blue, blue eyes never leave yours as he trails his face down your body, “You could’ve just asked, babe.”

Your hand finds its way into his hair, which is naturally as soft and pleasant to the touch as you’d dreamed it was. You clench tightly and he rumbles in approval.

“Like it rough, do you, omega?” His breathes, right over your drooling cunt. “Me, too.”

“You’d be so fucking hot,” You pant, “If you kept your damn mouth closed.”

When he laughs again, it feels a little better, but he’s always got to dig in. Pressing kisses to your clit that leave you fighting the urge to kick your legs.

“I’m always hot, baby,” God, it feels so sinful, so good, to have his exhalation ghosting over your slickness, “You’re just all antsy ‘cause of your heat. Let me make you cum, calm you down.”

This has the opposite effect of calming you down and he knew it would. Probably expected you to wrap your legs around his waist while he buried his face in your cunt, digging your heels hard into his sides, like spurs.

“Would be the first useful thing your mouth has done all year.” Gojo snickers against you and it’s annoying how good it feels.

And then he closes his lips around your clit, tongue tracing swiftly all over it, and you couldn’t stop squirming if you tried. Can’t stop the noises that come out of your mouth, spilling out, overflowing, like how the slick just pours from your clenching hole.

He fingers into you, two at once, and it’s embarrassing how little you feel it at all. Two, in and out, then a third, stretching inside you. Spreading them apart inside you. Making these awful wet noises – it doesn’t help that Gojo likes to smack his lips while he eats.

“Tasty. So wet. Did you stretch yourself for me?” He asks between laps at your clit, pressing himself closer to you while you whimper and teeter on the edge, “Got some knot toys to prep?”

“Fuck – Gojo!” Even when you’re trying to snap at him, he makes it fucking impossible, suckling at your clit before you can get the words out.

You cum with a light, airy cry. Short, shallow gasps as your other hand darts down to grasp his shoulder. Clinging.

“I will, I will,” Gojo takes a deep breath, over the wetness of you, making you shiver.

Eyes like blue flame look up at you. Sinful tongue hanging out of his mouth like a dog. Licking sticky lips. “Must’ve been hard, all that time you spent waiting. Don’t you worry, I’ve got a nice big knot ready just for you.”

And god, it’s fucking terrible, how you have to suppress a shiver of delight at his words, as he crawls up your body to be eye-level with you. His cock rubs along your sex, wetting itself so easily it should be embarrassing.

It is big. It’s so big and the knot swelling at the base of it is even better, thick and pulsing and throbbing.

Your stupid horny omega brain wails at the prospect of finally, finally being filled up by something hot and pulsing and living. Strong enough to hold you down and breed you. He’d give you the prettiest kids.

Oh god, oh fuck. Omega brain is seizing the steering wheel right now and you’re fucking terrified of where it’ll take you. You have no idea what you’re going to do when he knots you.

And he WILL fucking knot you if you have to mount and ride him yourself.

He’s grinning. Your instinct screams at you to bite. “I could smell it on you just now, you know. You want me to knot you soooo bad.”

You return his smile with bared teeth, “You want to knot me so bad, Gojo.” You’re still oversensitive when you grind your cunt against him but it’s worth it to see his stupid jaw drop open, “It makes you look fucking stupid.”

Pretty, pretty. He’s so pretty you could cry, and his cock is twitching against you, wet and burning and ready.

“Shut up,” Gojo breathes, close enough for you to smell his tingling scent on his breath, “And take it.”

A snarl builds in your throat, climbs on your lips – only to be knocked away thoroughly by the feeling of his fat head nudging, hot and swollen at your entrance. You’re so slick it feels almost gummy against you.

He drives himself in and you bite back a scream. Instead you let your hands claw down his back, and when they’re far enough down you just reach up to his shoulders again and dig your nails in harder.

The scrape at your fingertips, the way the smooth flesh of his back yields to yours – rough and savage enough to leave his eyes wide and gleaming.

His cock driving into you is like velvet, warm and wet and welcoming, filling an ache that makes you want to cry out.

There’s a stretch, because he’s big, of course he’s fucking huge but it’s the delicious type of stretch, a tight pinch that makes you shudder and clench and pull a moan or two out of him in return.

“See?” He nips at the underside of your jaw. Close, too close, inches away from your scenting glands, licking like he wants a taste, “Just needed some cock to calm you down. Poor – poor little omega, your heat must have been really bad, huh?”

You want to kill him. You want him to fill you up up UP more and more of his cock drives into you, it’s like it’s fucking endless, his knot urges forward at your entrance and the stretch –

“This – hhgh – coming from the beast in rut,” You snarl through strangled moans, “Who’s been throwing himself at me like an animal?”

Your hand in his hair trails down, over the back of his neck, and his whole body jerks at the touch. You’re no better, straining beneath him, talking out loud so you don’t lose your mind as his knot slides home.

“Did you think of me while you fucked your hand, Gojo?”  Dangerous territory. Dangerous thoughts. “Did you think about what I’d do to you? About me putting you on your ass while sparring because my scent turned you into a slut?”

He groans, long and laborious. You feel his knot lock in, his head thrown back (neck bared, pretty, pale, so empty and open) as he whines out his release.

It spurts inside you, hot and swelling and heady enough to bring you to a second release as his pelvis grinds against your clit.

“So what if I did?” There’s a challenge in his eyes, bright and sky blue and heart-rendingly beautiful in his blissed out state.

Something churns in your chest, something feral and wanting and you should know better but you can’t stop it now –

“Always think of me,” the demand leaves your lips before you can think of it, “You’ll always think of me when you touch yourself now, Gojo, you won’t be able to cum without it.” Before you know it, you’re purring, both from the afterglow and the words you’ve spoken with such misplaced confidence.

He thrusts lightly into you, a short useless movement which just makes you both more aware of his fat, swollen knot as it pumps his cum into you. Gojo purrs back at you, a warm rumble you can feel all throughout his form pressed against yours. His face against your chest, rubbing it – scenting you.

Your arms curl around him. Hold him close. “Never think of anyone else. Only me.”

The only response is louder purring. It’s painfully pleasant, comfortable, with the length of him pressed against you, his knot buried inside of you.

His eyes are half-lidded, dragging his parted lips over your skin. It’s too lazy and slow to be called a kiss, but the intimacy of It burns a trail across your skin. He licks at your neck in broad strokes and you mindlessly loll your head to the side, baring it for him.

Both of you content in the silence, sated by your climaxes. The first of many. A lull where you lie locked together so perfectly, enjoying the sinful trickles of his cum filling you up while his knot slowly deflates.

Naturally, Gojo can only let a good thing last so long.

“Never think of anyone else, huh?” His voice is unbearably smug, and smooth, and all things lovely. “Possessive and needy. What were you going to do if I hadn’t pounced on you?”

It takes you a moment to respond, disgruntled, “Next time you made an ass of yourself while sparring I would’ve just bitten you.”

A laugh; breathless and light. “I thought you didn’t like younger men?”

“A knot is a knot.” You clench around him a bit, just to drive your point home. It makes him spurt a little more into you, scalding hot. He hisses, face flushing.

He’s pretty like this. Then again, he’s always pretty.

“Yeah?” He leans in with glittering eyes, already recovered. “Bet you like my knot best. Bet you won’t want any other after this.”

You already don’t. You love the feel of him inside you, how he fits like a glove, how his knot fills you to bursting. It’s still inside you and you already want to feel it again. You already want him to be yours. All yours, only yours and yours forever.

But this is your asshole coworker who bickers with you, not your fucking boyfriend.

“I want another alpharight now,” You roll your eyes, like saying it would make it real, “A quieter one.”

“Heh.” His smile is as loud as his eyes. “No, you don’t. You wouldn’t let me so much as lick you if you weren’t already thirsting your brains out for me.”

God, are you that transparent? Or can he see through lies with the six eyes, too?

You push yourself upwards – not easy because Gojo’s laid his uselessly long torso against your chest – and the knot’s still mostly lodged in you but there’s enough give for you to push him back until you’re sitting on his lap.

Gojo is leaned against you, resting his body weight against you as he purrs like a careless, cuddly cat.

He doesn’t even flinch when you cup his face between your hands. Lazy, relaxed, content inside you.

“You have a lot of cheek for a brat who got hard after I knocked the wind out of him.” You tilt your head to the side. “Or maybe that’s what you’re hoping for on round two?”

And oh god. This guy can’t be for real. His knot has barely gone down enough to pull out and you feel him twitch inside you, hardening again. You pull him out with a twist of your hips and he actually whines.

He licks his lips. “What do you think?”

His cock flops against you again, hard, ready to go. You let out an incredulous laugh. “I called you a horny beast, I didn’t think you were actually some kind of – breeding whore.”

“Mmmh,” Large hands dart to hold your ass, pulling you closer, “Maybe I am. You’ll let me fuck you, though, so I must be doing something right.”

As dirty talk goes, you could do way better. But it looks like Gojo is just that easy – his scent deepens with excitement, electric on your tongue.

Mouthwatering. Stinging. It reaches deeper into you than you’d like, pulls out an answering tug of longing that spills over your lips before you can stop it.

Hands on his shoulders, over those pretty collarbones, shoving him back. It’s so easy; he falls back for you without resistance. Staring up at you through lowered lashes like an actual seductress.

Satoru Gojo is heartrendingly beautiful, above you or beneath you. It drives you mad.

“Tell me,” You want you want you want, “Tell me how badly you want to fuck me.” Tell me you want me. Tell me you love me. Tell me you’re mine and you’ll never be anyone else’s.

“You said it yourself,” Gojo breathes, “I’m a whore, yeah? A beast in rut, throwing myself at you.”

“Why me?” Tell me I’m the only one who could ever satisfy you. He might be a dumb horny whore of an alpha, but your omega brain is equally delirious for feeding into this delusion. Tell me you want me. Tell me you love me.

His smile is lazy, eyes glimmering, and you get a terrible intuition that he knows exactly what you’re asking, exactly what you want. And he’s not going to give it to you.

“Knew you could keep up.” He answers with a distinct ring of mockery. Fucking brat.

Wrong answer. Wrong. Answer.

Your hands jump to his throat. Squeezing instinctively. Like you can rip the words out of him, the voice that lights every fiber of your being on fire, in all the worst ways. And his neck feels so perfect under your hands. Like it was always meant to be there.

"Wanna bite?" He mouths, somehow smirking at you before his mouth drops into an "O" – you’re grinding against him, hard and careless of his overstimulation.

Those pretty blue irises shrink and dilate wide, shimmering with tears. His face is so pale, lashes such a pretty white that the red on his cheeks stands out all the more painfully. A moan of pleasure ripples under your fingertips, squandered in your grasp.

God, he really is a whore, isn’t he? So eager in front of you, dick out, lashes fluttering, throwing himself at you. Teasing you with his scent, his little gifts. Letting you see him like this. How could he let you see him like this, if he didn’t want to be yours?

Would he be so pathetic and needy for anyone? It sends rage through you, white-hot and yearning. All you can see is him, him, Gojo in all his debauched glory beneath you.

Ruin him. Ruin him for anyone else. Yours, yours, all yours. So much that he can never think of anyone else, like you can only think of him.

You squeeze harder, like you can pull his treacherous, perfect voice out if you can just press hard enough into his singing pulse. Close, close, so fucking close, the pull inside you draws you over his cock, up and down, rubbing against your throbbing clit.

His cock twitches in time with it as you grind away. Blood rushing in your ears, pounding. You’re close. He’s close. He’s going to cum. He’s going to cum outside of you.

Just as Gojo’s eyes squeeze shut, his cock jumping against you – you pull your cunt off, leaving no more stimulation. You don’t release your hold on his throat, hips guided purely by instinct, slotting him against your entrance.

“Don’t you dare,” You hiss, feeling his pulse flutter, “You don’t cum unless you’re inside me. Never.”

Eyes shooting wide to look up at you. His lips part, desperate, passionate, heavy with words that he doesn’t have the air for.

You don’t want to hear it. He’s said enough.

You ride him like you hate him - to be fair, you kind of do.

Slamming down on his dick, just short of his knot. Hunched over him so you can still choke him while you fuck him, see his stupid face contort in shock and bliss as his cock is suddenly enveloped.

His sweet-sour scent practically stings your tongue, heavy with arousal, with lust, with want –

He fills you up so fucking good, he’s infuriating, he’s huge, he’s perfect and why isn’t he yours? Everything inside you screams and all you know is the stretch in your core, the burning need.

So close so close you're almost THERE –

Panting, gasping, you bear yourself down on his knot with a wail, squeezing his neck like a stress toy. It makes him pulse and throb inside you.

Fuck fuck FUCK -

The STRETCH, it fucking burns, Gojo is writhing underneath you. It's like he's bigger than he was last time.

His hands aren’t at his throat but on your hips, pulling you impossibly closer, adding to all the weight that pulls you against him. Tight, hot, so, so fucking big.

“My knot,” You pant, half-feral with desire, “This is my fucking knot, Gojo, my dick, you don't put this in anyone else, do you hear me, ALPHA?"

There’s a rumble in his neck where he might be trying to answer you, but you ignore it in favor of bearing down on him. It's like all your breath leaves you in one big gasp, a whine escaping you as you finally pop the knot in.

You squeeze yourself, impossible, tight, feeling your whole cunt scream with the effort, the delicious stretch of a muscle pushed to its limit. You have him, you have him, you have him in you, all yours. Your core finally surges towards release at the feeling of being filled.

And then you look down at what you’ve captured, your alpha, teary-eyed, red-faced, eyes glazed over in bliss as his lips part to take a breath he can’t manage.

Cock burning inside you, hips bucking up, hands clutching you like a lifeline. Hands so uselessly large that his thumb can reach to roll over your clit.

All at once, you let go. Climax overwhelming you both, his first gasping breath painted with the sudden release.

You want to see his face while you do it, collapsing forward as your breath is stolen from you in waves of white-hot pleasure. Gojo lets out a high pitched noise that he probably shouldn’t be capable of, choking, crying.

“F-fuck,” He half-chokes, half-sobs, racing to clutch you to his chest.

You’ve never seen him so uncomposed, so helpless, your name on his lips, the six eyes blown wide and unseeing. Heat floods your insides as he releases, knot swelling impossibly larger. A squeak escapes you, and you press the side of your face into his toned chest as he holds you close.

You’re smaller than him – most people would be. It’s funny, feeling smaller in his arms. All the fight and fervor trickles away, slowly, like it’s making room for his cum.

Something terribly dark and feral inside you wants to rut against him and make him whimper more, now that he could hear it, but you don’t have the strength.

“Surprised you didn’t bite me,” He muses while he traces mindless patterns over your bare back.

“For what conceivable reason would I have bitten you during that?” His chest is warm, so warm. You’re not paying much attention to what you’re saying, just lazily snapping back at him for stating the obvious. “In case you hadn’t noticed, I literally choked you.”

“Hell yeah you did.” He rubs his cheek against your hair. “It was super hot. Do it again.”

Idiot. You try to ignore the hunger his words ignite inside you, the stupid glee you get from the thought that he likes it just as much as you do. “What, do you want me to bite you?”

“As hot as it would have been to see you take what you want,” God, his grin is just so annoying, and it makes your heart skip a beat, to see that fire in his eyes, “You’d probably feel all bad about it later or some crap. Like you trapped me or something. Which would be super hot, by the way. You have my permission to trap me at any time, especially if I’m sticking my dick in you.”

“Well, now I don’t want you at all,” You lie, blatantly, like a liar.

Satoru snickers, which really isn’t good for your heart. “What, because I’m such a kinky whore, you think I’ve been all used up already? Should I give myself some bruises and hickey sometime to really sell the fantasy?”

That gets an eye roll. “I didn’t degrade you enough while we were fucking, is that it? Had to pick up some slack yourself?”

“Heheh. You sure liked calling me a whore and a slut.” He wiggles his eyebrows at you, “What can I say, I’m just that good a lay. Always give the lady what she wants.”

“Sure.” And yet you still don’t have what you want from him.

“You’re the only person I’ve fucked like this, you know.” He says, more softly than he should.

It’s just so unfair. How he makes your heart stumble. How his little admission sends a trill of hope through you.

“Fucked how? During your rut?” He didn’t seem like the type to grin and bear the suffering.

“You know,” He shuffles again, “Like this. For fun.”

“What, I’m the only person you’ve let call you a whore? Choke you? Be more specific, Gojo,” The name tastes bitter in your mouth, “All the other times you just had to lie back and think of England?”

“Well, you’re the first person who’s fucked me that also called me Gojo, for one.”

He really has to ruin everything. “Just shut up. Nothing you say makes me feel better.”

Arms wrap tighter around your waist. “I mean it, though. I was looking forward to this. I never look forward to it. Letting down my technique, fucking some omega until I knotted them.”

You want to bite him, take a chunk out. Pull his hair and rip some of it out of his stupid empty skull. “Gojo –”

“No, listen.” And that’s a tone you haven’t heard before – low, commanding, an alpha’s demand. He hadn’t spoken to you like that once.

“I used to hate it, dread it. The long wait for my knot to go down before I could finally just leave and put everything back up again. Being stuck with some stranger in such an intimate position, feeling them touch me, it was the worst. The absolute fucking worst.”

He nuzzles his head into your neck, like he’s basking in your scent. “This, though? This is the best. I want to do this for every rut, forever.”

Another skipped beat, and that’s it. Your foolish, graceless heart can only drag you through so much humiliation and pining before you rip it out and stomp on it yourself.

“So what?” You lower your voice in return, hard and cutting, “Who says I want to spend all your ruts with you, Gojo?”

“Thought you didn’t do one-night stands.” He smirks at you. You want to punch him.

“What did you think this was?” Did he think you were pining for a relationship while he was just fucking it out? Sure, you were pathetic enough to want it, but you weren’t pathetic enough to expect it. Not on your fucking life.

But then.

There’s the answer, the “A public service for needy omegas~” or some other witty retort. You can already hear his voice ringing in your ears, playful and taunting.

But the sound doesn’t come. Nothing comes at all. Complete silence.

Gojo’s lean, muscled form has stiffened, now rigid against you where it had been relaxed. You can feel his hesitance rippling through the air. His scent is more sour than sweet. Spoiled.

“I thought… you wanted me.” You’ve never heard him sound so uncertain, so afraid. You’ve never heard Gojo sound afraid, period. “I was courting you, and you accepted my gifts, so I – ”

“When were you courting me?” You snap, even though you make the connection instantly. He had given you gifts. He’d spend time with you, given you something with his scent. Paid attention to your needs.

“This whole time?” He sounds like he’s starting to panic, now, “What did you think was happening? We’ve been flirting literally since the day I met you! I might not be the most traditional guy, but I got the important parts down!”

It doesn’t sound real, for Gojo to be freaking out like this. He turns you around so you can see his blue eyes, wide and wild with frustration, “Why did you think I gave you things with my scent and spent every spare hour in close quarters with you?”

“Because they were always accompanied with snarky remarks? Because you taunt me at every opportunity?” You say it straight to his face. “We literally insult each other every time we meet.”

“You like it, you tease me back!” He grouses, “You’re super into that, you fucked me anyways!”

“Yeah. I thought that was all you wanted.” You swallow. “You’re supposed to ask someone to court them, Gojo.”

“Of course you wanted me to court you. You seduced me when I pinned you down and then knocked me on my ass!”

You’re upset with him and all, but he’s just got this infuriating ability to make you laugh no matter what. “Most people would take that as a no.”

He’s smiling back. Beaming. His scent is clean, like just hearing you laugh made it all better, “But your answer isn’t a no. You li~ke~ me.”

“Not so much right now.” You look away. “So, what? I’m just a fool for not knowing what you wanted, when you never even told me?”

“I thought it was obvious.” You can hear the frown in his voice. “You’re a pretty proud person. What did you think I was doing when I gave you all those gifts?”

“You literally told me I was being needy. I figured you were mocking me.”

“But then why did you accept them?” His tone, laced with something awful in his scent, brings your gaze back to his face.

He looks kind of… heartbroken.

You can’t look at him long. “Because… I am needy.”

His arms reach up from your waist, cradling your back, pulling you against him. Chin tucked where your shoulder meets your neck. Face buried in your scent glands, just where he’d put a bite. If he – if he wanted you.

“When you finally admitted it, I thought I’d feel glad.” He sounds like he’s complaining, but your neck is wet. “You just have to steal away all my victories, huh? Can’t even let me win this one.”

Why is he acting so pathetic, like a wounded puppy, when you’re the one who admitted to being down so bad you’d accept even mockery from the person you wanted to get with?

And then he sniffles, like some teenage girl who just got dumped. “I thought you knew I liked you. I thought we were having fun. Teasing each other.”

“It was fun, that’s why I did it. I just…” You swallow. “I didn’t think it would mean anything more for you. You know by now that I – I like you a lot. Way more than normal. There is nothing normal about how much I want you. I didn’t think you wanted me the same way.”

“That’s literally the worst thing I’ve ever heard. You didn’t know I wanted you back?” There’s more wetness on your neck, but this is warm. The familiar touch of his tongue dragging over your scent glands.

Gojo takes a shuddering breath, and it occurs to you that he must be taking in your scent. “How could you even think that?”

“Why are you so upset?” His whining brings you back to life, just a little. Enough to be angry. “For – for fuck’s sake already, Gojo. Say it in as many words. I told you, the whole reason I thought so was because you never told me what you meant outright.”

Another sniffle. “You’re so mean. You know what courting is. You just like bullying me.”

His sniveling revitalizes you further. It’s easier, knowing he can be pitiful for you, too. “Say it, Gojo, or you’ll be just another notch in my belt.”

“And call me Satoru! How are we supposed to date if you don’t even call me by name?!”

“We’re not dating. Say it, say it right now,” You’re getting sick of his crap, “Or I will rip your dick off.”

You can hear it, again. Is that a promise? Just wait until I’m hard to do it.

And you can see it, actually, how it physically pains him not to say it.

Gojo says your full name, out loud, and you’re helpless at the sound. “I have romantic feelings for you. I would like to court you with the intention of marriage. Mating. Whatever.”

He just can’t let you win one, can he? And yet, you’ve never heard a better sound. It feels like a massive burden has been lifted from your shoulders. Your chest.

“Two full sentences of formality,” You muse, “Impressive.”

“Right?” He preens, “Lots of things about me are impressive. You’ll see while we’re courting.”

“You never fail to impress me with how much of a dumbass you can be, Gojo.”

“Satoru. And that’s not a yes. Hurry up and say yes! I know you wanted to bite me back there, you’re totally crappy at hiding it.”

You sigh. “I did. But you didn’t want to bite me, did you?”

A pause. You’re suddenly uncomfortably aware of how close his face is to your neck.

“I always want to bite you. Ever since I met you. Smelled you.” His tongue runs along your throat, so hot it almost feels like it burns. “You can’t tell because you’ve never seen a version of me that doesn’t want to sink my teeth into your neck.”

You swallow, and he purrs, kissing over your pulse.

“It’s okay, though. I can be generous.” And his voice is back to being annoying again. “Even when you’re so demanding. I can only jerk off to you, I can only stick my dick in you – gosh, you said not to cum unless I was inside you, right? You really signed yourself up for – ”

“Oh, fuck off, Gojo – ” You interrupt yourself, “ – Satoru. Are you sure you want to… I mean. I’m older than you, you know? By a lot. I don’t have some kind of pedigree, and – well, I mean. You know.”

You flush despite yourself, “I’m… demanding, I guess. I like to bully you, if you want put it that way.” He laughs. “I’m sure you have better prospects.”  

“Yeah,” A hand reaches up to stroke your hair. He pulls you so your face is pressed into his chest, so you can hear him purr for you. Loudly, now. “That’s why I’m courting you, first. Until you’re sure you’re my best prospect. Then I’ll mark you. Then you can mark me, and not even feel a little bit bad about it, after.”

It’s scary, you think, as the darkness creeps into your vision – just how accurate his prediction of you was. “You don’t think I’m… too needy?”

“I love that you’re too needy.” A kiss to the top of your head, “You look at me like I’m the thing you want the most you want in the whole world. Makes me crazy, how much you want me. I want you to bite me. Eat me whole. I want to open up my chest and shove you inside.”

A breath leaves you, mostly because he’s holding you too tightly. Just tight enough. “So you like that I’m obsessed with you. But do you like me?”

“Yeah,” He sighs, rubbing his cheek into your hair affectionately, “So much it’s kind of scary. You’re all I can think about most of the time. I would look forward to slipping you a little present all day. Then I’d get hard after watching you open it, and I’d have to rub one out. You have no idea how happy it makes me, just being near you.”

You’re quiet for a bit. All you can hear is his gentle purring, rumbling through his body and yours.

One of your hands finds one of his. “…you’ll be mine? My one and only? You won’t ever want anyone else?”

He squeezes. “Just you. You should be more worried about becoming my one and only. If I can’t jerk off or fuck anyone else, that’s all gonna be on you, baby.”

“I’m not particularly worried,” You yawn, “If you get to be too much, I’ll just choke you out again or something.”

You feel him start to twitch inside you, knot still stuck in your entrance – no way. He can’t be hard this soon, not when he hasn’t even finished –

“Hehe. Shouldn’t have said that unless you wanted to go again~!”

“Satoru!!”

[mrs-monaghan]

Not to go into detail and make this long but I remember how a while ago, I was in your blog and I came across you saying;

But, it is of my personal opinion that if they broke up it would destroy JK. Jimin would be heartbroken and devastated too but it would hit JK harder.

And now that we found out Jungkook was the one to sign up for the buddy system and wrote Jimins name for who he wanted to be his partner.

https://x.com/thekmlogic/status/1881424425972814167?s=46&t=DiZ6pHHxW3ahpd70quaKnA

And it really does prove your point to a whole other level. Not that I needed another reason to believe it but because this type of love doesn’t exist for “just friends” and I’ll never know why or how people don’t see it.

We seen how deeply not having Jimin there effected Jungkook. The man was crying on live..

They went on vacations for AYS together, even back to Juju Island again, without V. Who knows about Busan after the last Juju trip.

They could last 18 months away from friends, family, ARMY, but never each other.

That’s why they’re still out and about together even on vacation.

https://x.com/stopkookminpls/status/1882055760152347025?s=46&t=DiZ6pHHxW3ahpd70quaKnA

Vmin. JiHope. Namkook. JinKook.

(My baby, Yoongi isn’t an option.)

So many close friends in BTS who could have went together. Nobody but Jikook went together. Is that not a sign something is different compared to the others?

Anybody could have went with Namjoon seeing how bad he’s struggling to be happy but no.. At the end of the day, this is just more proof on how real their relationship is.

Oh yeah! 1300% So many reasons to believe in Jikook but enlisting together... that was... that was definitely something. From what I've heard, K-taekookers stopped existing after get out of your imagination happened. Then we lost more vermin after GCF. Matter of fact many of them became jkkrs. (Unfortunately that's also when so many more were created thanks to tkk-lives, but whatever) Then more were lost after Rosebowl. And some more left after the talk during ITS 1. and of course we lost a good number after the Taennie walk in Paris. A few more left after AYS dropped but not enough stopped shipping tkk when Jikook enlisted together. But if you ask me, this is what should have had them all leaving fr fr. This... enlisting together was no small fit. Not only has it never been done before, but they really didn't have to. You know? Like u said, RM too should have enlisted with a member if it doesn't carry as much weight as we jkkrs think it does. Know it does.

It was a huge risk they took but they did it anyway because to them it was necessary.

JIKOOK👏🏽IS👏🏽MOTHERFUCKIN👏🏽REAL!!!👏🏽

So, anon is talking about this post. And while there are deeper reasons connected with their enlistment, we already know how bored JK can be without Jimin. We've seen it

(Thanks @chicknbunny13 😘)

Sidebar: boyfriend V is right there on his phone doing nothing and yet, JK is bored out of his mind. Hmm 🤔✍🏽✍🏽✍🏽✍🏽

We've seen it with every single time he came live only when Jimin left the country, talking about how he got bored and missed us.

JK is a lying liar who lies 😂 but we forgive him. If I had a Jimin I would do the same 🤣

So back to your tweet, anon. My friends and I did suspect that that's what the numbers on their helmets meant

But there was no way to be sure. All we knew to be fact was that it had to have been JK's idea.

What i love about being a Joker is that, we are never wrong. We have earned the right to be cocky. You know what I mean?

It's what happens when you actually stan the real couple. Couples, have patterns. That's why the vermin are always changing their stories... nothing about being a tkkr is consistent. Their theories change overnight depending on what they discover or decide to make up that day.

Meanwhile, Jikook are predictable because they are the true couple. And that's why when we make guesses we are rarely ever wrong.

Thanks for the tweets anon. Support Jikook for clear skin

Damn, they're fine as hell!

[lewisvinga]

stay away ! | pablo gavi x fem! real madrid player! ! reader

summary; after their relationship goes public, pablo has to face threats from a certain team over his girlfriend, the baby of the team

fc; carla camacho

warnings; ?

notes; requested ! MY REQUESTS ARE CLOSED 🤒😫😫

masterlist !

yourusername uploaded to their story !

[caption 1; hubba hubba pablogavi ] [caption 2; mi amor 🩷]

lindacaicedo__11 replied to your story !

lindacaicedo__11 q es esto ??? [what is this ???]

atheeneeaa_10 replied to your story !

atheeneeaa_10 uuuuhmmmm,,,, y/n??

vinijr replied to your story !

vinijr y/n?? why are you dating a b*rca player ??????

carolineweir95 replied to your story !

carolineweir95 since when have you been in a relationship????

carolineweir95 with someone from the rival team too????

pablogavi replied to your story !

pablogavi couldn’t even ease ur teammates into knowing, just a straight hard launch 😭😭😭

yourusername i like to give them heart attacks for funsies sometimes 🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️

yourusername they’re already going crazy, even vini😭😭😭

pablogavi yeah if a barca femeni player was dating one of ur guys i’d question ur morals and thought process����

yourusername so he’s right for questioning my morals and thought process 🤔🤔

pablogavi no your morals are right bc ur dating me 😁😁😁

liked by pablogavi, linda__caicedo11, and others !

yourusername: what a long but exciting week 🥸

tagged; judebellingham, carolineweir95, linda__caicedo11

pablogavi: 😍😍😍 liked by yourusername !

pablogavi: siempre tan bella [always so beautiful]

yourusername: 🥹🫶

olgacarmona7: she’s a child.

yourusername: we’re the same age olga

pablogavi: we’re the same age tho🤨

atheeneeaa_10: STAY AWAY FROM HER🤺

username: it’s like that one demi lovato meme 😭😭😭

username: the scars on her leg 🙁

username: LINDAAA

username: omg jude

username: starboy and stargirl of real madrid iktr

judebellingham: nah why do i look so awkward

yourusername: just a bit 😕😕

lindacaicedo__11: 😋👍

yourusername: 😁

username: the way the squad is so protective of her is so 😭😭

username: y/n acting like nothing happened after hard launching her relationship w gavi is the level of idgaf i aspire to be at 🤭

liked by pablogavi, sofie.svava, and others !

yourusername: 🤍🤍

tagged; pablogavi

paablogavi: think ❤️💙 is a better combo😁

sofie.svava: no.

yourusername: you’re on thin ice , babe , very thin

kathellensousa: stay away🤺🤺

pablogavi: always supporting the loml 😁❤️💙

yourusername: always supporting the loml too😁🤍🤍

username: not them using their team color for hearts im 😭😭

username: i’m a culer but omg i love y/n sm😞😞

username: pls i love them

username: football’s power couple fr 😍

frejaolofssonn: ouuuu girl….

judebellingham: exactly what i said 🙄🙄🙄

camavinga:🙄🙄🙄🙄

yourusername: i can say a lot abt u three watch it 🙄

carolineweir95: as long as you’re happy 😕😕

pablogavi: she is😁

lindacaicedo__11: let her speak for herself 😒

yourusername: you’re all drama queens 😭

liked by yourusername, pedri, and others !

pablogavi: mi amor ❤️‍🩹

tagged; yourusername

yourusername: amorrrrr🫶🫶

yourusername: tqqq🥹 [ily]

pablogavi: tqqqq❤️

username: she’s so cute :(

username: the 2nd pic…. MIGHT go crazy idk

pedri: simp

pablogavi: and proud 😌

olgacarmona7: i mean….. she looks happy :/

lindacaicedo__11: i guess this is ok

sofie.svava: barley ok let’s be fr

judebellingham: sigh….

pablogavi: 🤨🤨

yourusername: shhhh they’re slowly going into the acceptance phase

username: jude wyd here

atheeneeaa_10: watch your back if i see a single hint of sadness come from her bc of you.

pablogavi: aye aye 🫡

username: sad day for the gavi girls 🕊️🕊️

username: i ADORE them

username: they’re so😞😞

username: Y/NNNNNNN

username: enemies to lovers fr

username: the merengue x culer combo goes hard tbh

[taeaura]

hello, I was wondering if you could do a Thomas Hewitt x reader that has two kids. Both being under 10. Like how feels about it and the whole family. You can do wild and do whatever you want for this. I love your writing so much! I hope you have a good day and make sure to take care of yourself. Thank you if you do this.

Father!Thomas Hewitt With Two Kids *Under Ten*

Hi!!! I'm so sorry this took a while to get to - I've been busy with life things 😭 Enjoy Tommy + the family with his two precious angels

Also ty ty!!!!

I feel like Hoyt call Tommy's kids his "little buddies"...no idea why lmao

_____

The day he saw his children was the day Thomas was 'reborn.' He had a purpose outside of killing, outside of his uncle. He had you. He had your children. His own little *or not so little* family - Two mini-me's, what could go wrong?

A lot.

Thomas can get a bit overwhelmed when his uncles are yelling at him, or you, to "shut those kids up" - It reminds him of his childhood...not fun times.

Thomas worries quite a bit. About what, you ask? Everything…

What if they’re ostracized? What if they’ll suffer just as he does? What if he isn’t a good father? A good husband? Are they going to be okay? Safe? Are you going to be okay?

If he could, he'd be praising his babies to hell and back - He loves them so so much. If they happen to have the same skin condition as he does, or the same cleft-lip, you'll find him crying just thinking about their future. He really doesn't want them to hurt like he did. Like he does. He'll pray to the Lord above to keep them safe.

Okay...now back to the happy headcanons!

Tommy has chubby babies - Doesn't matter what size his partner is, the babies are FAT !! Tall kids, too. Chunky mini-me's with curly dark hair and freckles - Maybe a cleft lip??

He loves his babies very much - a very VERY protective and slightly overbearing dad {he just wants what’s best} 

He’d probably wrestle with them if he was in the mood. He'll go easy on them, don't worry :)

Would NEVER let them in the basement. Ever. Do you know how dangerous it is down there? Not to mention how traumatizing it could be…

Always always ALWAYS willing to help. He knows you're tired, and he's willing to do anything to help relieve some stress for both you and the family. He's surprisingly good with bedtimes, too. Although he can't read to his kids, he gives really good hugs before bed.

Totally would sew clothing and toys for his babies - They're a bit patchy and disheveled, but that's the aesthetic of this family, let's be real.

—

Luda Mae loves her grandkids, don’t get me wrong, but lord, does that woman need a break. Two kids under the age of 10 PLUS Jedidiah? Uh-uh. Nada. No. 

"Go outside and play with the dogs, you're messing up the kitchen!" Type shit

trust me when I say she will happily discipline them if you or Thomas don’t feel like it lmao

Definitely the type to baby-talk them even when they get older, yet at the same time increase their responsibilities lol

She's always there to support them - Showering her grand babies with compliments {except Jedidiah...poor guy}

—

Jedidiah will “babysit” sometimes. AKA, play dates! hooray…

He’ll ask to hold them {he’s kinda hesitant though}, draw with them, draw portraits of them {though poorly…he’s trying}, teach them about baseball {because I think he’s into that canonically? I don’t remember}

He loves his…cousins? Siblings? Depends on who you ask, I guess....?

—

Monty does not care. At all. 

“Will someone shut that baby up?” *he mutters under his breath 

“Will you cut out that racket?!” 

Would probably keep his dog away from the kids..for good reason {That thing bites}

Pouty faces and eye rolls all the time lol. Don’t be surprised if the kids end up with his attitude at times 

“Ugly little things…”

He has love for them….somewhere. Deep down…..very deep down.

—

Hoyt, as we saw in TCM 2003, doesn’t mind kids - let alone babies. At least not when he’s “working.”

He'll coo at them - "You look just like your daddy, don'tcha? Huh?" - He's the type of uncle who's always asking/assuring that "he's the favorite"....okay buddy

Would make minor jokes about Thomas "finally getting laid" and "getting a family of his own." In all actuality Hoyt Charlie is proud of him. Jealous to bits, but proud - and happy.

_____

Yay okay! We've reached the end. Sorry if it's a bit short, my brain is still trying to get back into Tumblr-writing lol

[stressleches]

Rumor has it (Part 3) | Tom Blyth

pairing: Tom Blyth x fem!actress!reader

summary: Ever since the premiere of tbosas fans of yours have been shipping you with your costar, Tom Blyth. Is it all just rumors or were they right all along?

a/n: I’m loving all the support I’ve been getting with this mini series so here are the links to part 1 & part 2 if you haven’t been caught up! As always feedback is appreciated and requests are open!

ynusername Say hello to my nephew, Lenny 🐶 @rachelzegler @tomblyth

view all comments

user1 not YN calling Lenny her nephew I CANT

↳ user3 I mean her and Rachel are practically sisters at this point 🥺

↳ user1 true

user4 I never wanted to be a dog so bad in my entire life until now

↳ user2 BARKBARKBARKBARK

↳ user5 why do I relate to this comment so bad 😫

user6 I guess that makes Tom the uncle

user2 Didn’t Tom say he’s getting a dog in an interview and the breed he mentioned is YN’s favorite

↳ user3 they’ll make great dog parents

rachelzegler come back Lenny misses you two 😭

↳ user5 Lenny is a real one

↳ user4 If YN and Tom left me I’d be missing them too

↳ user2 we need more Lenny content from them pls

tomyndaily It’s the way he’s looking at @ynusername in this pic for me 😫

view all comments

user3 Idk who to be jealous of YN or Rachel?!

↳ user1 same

↳ user6 I’m jealous of Tom tbh 😤

user2 He looks at her with so much love and admiration

↳ user4 men take notes ✍️

user5 can’t wait to see more of them on the red carpet soon

↳ user2 I just know they’re going to slay

ynusername Coryo may not be a gentleman, but @tomblyth sure is. Tbosas is out now in theaters everywhere!! 🌹🎶🐍

view all comments

user3 the Taylor Swift reference!!

↳ user1 she’s not wrong though

↳ user2 not mother quoting mother

user4 I wish Tom Blyth was real 😭

↳ ynusername me too 😔

↳ user5 OMG YALL SHE REPLIED

↳ user3 she’s too funny

tomyndaily I love how she took this while Tom picked her up from the airport

↳ user6 proof?

↳ tomyndaily posted in stories

rachelzegler did you just Mike Wazowski me? 🙃

↳ ynusername I just realized I did after posting it sorry not sorry 😆

user1 YALL TOM LIKED HER POST

↳ user5 as he should

yntomsources A old pic of Tom at @ynusername house back in 2022 while they were filming tbosas taking from her insta stories

view all comments

user4 I never seen this pic before

user2 buzzcut Tom for the win

↳ user3 agree to disagree

↳ user1 it’s not that serious

user5 I went to her stories but I don’t see it anywhere 🤔

↳ yntomsources she deleted it

↳ user6 I guess she wasn’t a fan of the buzzcut 🫢

↳ user4 team flowing locks is better

user2 we have to spam her now to see which she prefers skskskskksksks

↳ user3 BET

taglist: @bada-lee-ily (lmk if anyone else would like to be tagged in future projects)

[almostempty]

Hey, been thinking about your doc alot since I read it in terms of how I want to continue with my own writing and reading habits.

I hope this isn't a stupid question or too taxing for you to answer considering you just essentially wrote a dissertation, but what are your processes for finding, reading and interacting with truly inclusive 'x Reader' fics these days?

i think i suggested to start with bipoc authors and i included some questions to consider when reading/reblogging that should be in the doc, but i'll add some of my more personal opinions here today and tag some author recs while i'm yapping:

i don't think there's really a 100%-inclusive-to-everyone reader-insert but for all the reasons in that doc this is where i'd start

i'd start with bipoc authors 100% there's a rec list @javierpena-inatacvest collected recently here and @salingers made a bipoc authored rec list and tbr here and the @inclusivepedro-oscarlibrary (i'm sure there's more i'm missing)

extra shoutouts to some of my bipoc friends specifically bc they're so talented i'll dickride for them all day idgaf go read @gothcsz @yxtkiwiyxt @clubsoft @thundermartini @cxrsed-angel @lotusbxtch @letsgobarbs alsoooo read works that bipoc authors rec and share (though i imagine they're used to reading things that aren't inclusive but still support their peers so it's not like they'll have only have inclusive/diverse recs)

i'd also prioritize reading works by 2slgbtqia+ authors or authors who write queer fics or poly fics bc i'd guess they're likely writing stories outside of the colonizer script that revolves around whiteness, monogamy, and reproduction already

shoutouts to @miss-oranje-disco-dancer @for-a-longlongtime @sin-djarin @nonbinairyboi @itwasntimethatdidit40 for writing some of my fav queer fics and/or being my fav humans, i'm sure there's more of you i should be adding but i have goldfish brain soz <3

@pedrostories has some tag filters for their collection that might help too (i'm soooo glad there are organized folks among us)

(i think someone was collecting recs for stories with trans characters on monday for trans day of visibility but i don't remember who it was or if i'm remembering that right at all (?) / likely there are more directories and collections i'm just not aware of) additionally i like to read authors that are intentional about writing complex readers like @slimybeth69's girl dinner (heheh), and world building with diverse OCs like @auteurdelabre's SMTL, and by authors who are outspoken in the community about diversity and are intentional about their writing and moodboards like my girls @syd-djarin and @probablyreadinsmut (hi <3 and i know there's more of y'all too) AND make friends with other readers in the comments and share recs ! i won't put my non-writer mutuals on blast but they're full of the best recs or down to talk about fics for days <3

finally,

personally! i’d love to see more OC fics and character x character (crossover or canon) fics getting love too anecdotally, i used to only read longfics on ao3 about din or javi and felt like i saw fics with more canon/au plot beyond just the romance or smut that at the very least, felt further away from the colonial values/heteropatriarchy fantasy

finally (for real),

if the tropes you’re most drawn to are ones rooted in those colonial/patriarchal ideals, i’d guess you’re inevitably going to be swimming in fics written by white people for white people—not because they’re trying to be exclusionary, but because those are the dominant societal narratives, and they’re gonna be popular for that reason so it'll take more intentional critical reading and filtering to find what you want to read or share...i hope that makes sense

as always, i'm not perfect! i'm sure i've shared and written things that i'd reconsider now and there might be obvious suggestions i'm missing but anyway hope this helps!

sorry if anyone didn't want to be tagged

and if anyone else read all of this feel free to add your recs or self rec

[lovelessrage]

Loveless: A Loveless Review

[Plain Text: Loveless: A Loveless Review]

Trigger Warnings For: Discussion of sex, sex negativity, platonormativity, arophobic tropes, and anti-loveless rhetoric

Disclaimer/Disclosure: I couldn’t finish this book. This will factor heavily into the review, as it has to do with how some scenes, details, and the writing quality were just very hard to sit with and continue. I got about 50% through, so I didn’t just skim pages and get back to you on it.

You might guess I don’t think of this book highly if I had to put it down and stop reading. This would be correct. However, I have more in depth thoughts than that. If you like this book and don’t want to read negative things about it, that's fine, but I implore you to read it anyway. A lot of the problems in this book are present in a lot of creations I see and can be a valuable teaching lesson; loveless people aren’t out to ruin your fun because biases got questioned.

Alright. Enough disclaimers. Review under the cut.

The Bingo Card: Surprisingly, Not A Strikeout

People who have been following me for a while may remember I mentioned I went into reading this book with a bingo card in hand: Loveless and Tired Bingo, a sheet made by yours truly. I did not get Bingo with this book! I did, however, fill 17 spaces out of 25; it just didn’t happen to line up, not because the book passed with flying colors. We’ll return to the Bingo Card at the end of this post to see what it looked like. But, letting you know, that’s a rate of 68% of all squares ticked on Loveless and Tired Bingo. Not looking so hot. 

Let’s start with the meat of the post so nobody has to read it all if they just wanted my representation opinions. Other things like writing will be shuffled down for your convenience.

Edit: Past Scowl is a liar and a fraud and did not have maims glasses on, and misread the bingo card! I did get Bingo. Oops. Point still stands because the data is the same, I just gave this book a sliver more credit than it deserved for not getting one.

Platonormativity, Envy, and The Loneliness Whirlpool

If this book had a full course meal, normativity would ironically be a key ingredient in every plate on the menu. Loveless has a platonormativity problem that confronts you from page 1, more realistically before that; the blurb!

[Text ID: From the marvelous author of Heartstopper comes an exceptional YA novel about discovering that it's okay if you don't have sexual or romantic feelings for anyone... since there are plenty of other ways to find love and connection. /End ID]

I promise not all my complaints will be raving about one sentence, but this kinda encapsulates the entirety of my problem with Loveless: Georgia Warr is not supported in her own novel. Loveless is a deeply insecure book that many can relate to, but, really… does it alleviate that insecurity, or just cover it up? There’s an unspoken “but” to every part of Loveless’ philosophy about aspec people [especially aroaces], where they must have platonic love to make them whole, to “fix” and “redeem” their lacking attractions. This has always bothered me, and it’s not an uncommon opinion in the community, unfortunately.

Aroaces aren’t allowed to simply “be” – they must be more. They must be so platonically invested you forget they’re aroace, because they have all this other type of love to give the world. It’s reflective of a view on a community sourced from hurt and exclusion, of someone trying to rebuild their worth on a new forefront. It doesn’t make it less of what it is, though: it’s a “yes they’re valid, but” statement that serves as the backbone for far too many aspec-focused media. 

Georgia is a deeply unsure character, and there’s nothing wrong with her being this way; she’s a fictional character made to represent a journey of acceptance, not a real person with the ability to inflict harm on other real people. She does reflect the author’s biases in many ways and many points on the same token, though, acting as a mouthpiece. This often comes in Georgia’s insistence her friendships are simply stronger than other relationship types, as well as her reflexive tendencies to judge the friendless.

One of my many, many hurdles in this book had to do with Rooney [someone save her and half the cast from this novel, please], when the group realizes she’s only a socialite, not really a long-term relationship holder, and the entire room devolves into silent judgment. Georgia does not defend her newfound friend, simply noting she thought differently of her. What about Rooney not having many friends changes her outgoing personality? It doesn’t. It’s simply the fact that Rooney being friendless makes her weird, as with many things Rooney is unfairly demonized for in this novel.

The emphasis on friends doesn’t end here, and persists through the entire novel, practically. It is the main focus, when it isn’t talking about Georgia’s disinterests, and her friend circle is very important to her. All of this is fine. What isn’t fine is the expectation and casual enforcement of friendship being all you have, so you must seize it; this book, even though I wouldn’t recommend it, is often given as The Book on being aroace, but I wouldn’t agree [you’re free to tell me I can’t have an opinion on that if I’m not aroace, but at least read on before deciding anything, alright, official hear me out warning]. One, not all aroaces are alloplatonic, and two, this:

Why Is This Book Written Like A Workplace Safety Seminar

It’s a very… cookie-cutter way to be aroace, and cookie cutter aroaces exist in real life! The rep should exist, no doubt, and shouldn’t be taken away from anyone. It’s not my problem per se that the book is semi-stereotypical. What my problem is has to do with something I see a lot.

The book falls into many of the pitfalls of what I’m dubbing “the pamphlet effect”: when a novel, show, etc. continuously needs to halt the plot to remind the audience this character is different, and explains this to you in a way that resembles an educational pamphlet at a pride event. Georgia Warr feels like an example given to explain a concept more than a person, and I feel bad for her because of how little this book engages with her actual character when it shines through. I understand the book is primarily centered on her journey through the spectrum, but very little is given to make Georgia’s experience unique outside of one scene off the top of my head. Her interests, hobbies, and unique feelings only seem to play a role when it comes time to be an author mouthpiece on slutshaming for fun and sport; only one scene, the forced kiss with Jason when rehearsing the play, really blends her life experiences with her aroace experiences.

Georgia feels designed to be an everywoman, and it was very disappointing to say the least. Very little of the book actually feels like I’m with her, or learning about her unique take on being aroace as a theatre fan or young adult figuring things out; it just feels like Georgia [and the reader] are being dragged through the Cliff’s Notes version of what it is to discover being aroace, rather than a look at how a character like this might feel differently than others on a fuller, whole scale. She’s a hole that can fit most shapes into it, which makes her broadly relatable, but not as fun or engaging to read about if you don’t fit precisely in the demographic Georgia is for; even if you do, is there much to engage with beyond “I’m like that too!”? 

This isn’t just a Georgia problem, either, as many, many characters in this book are walking stereotypes or very flat. But, we’ll get into that later [if you want to get into it now, skip to Writing Problems, Oh My!].

The Fingering In The Room: Loveless’ Weird Ideas About Sex

Alright, if you’re sex repulsed and braved the storm to get some insight, this next paragraph is just complete confusion about this book’s sex scenes and talking about some of the details within. If you want to skip that, skip the next paragraph.

Why is everybody fingering each other? Fingering is fine and it feels good, but it is basically the only sexual act this book knows outside of making out with tongue. Someone having sex in Loveless? They better have clipped their nails because at least two are going in. It feels like a point of research that was skipped because it was unimportant, which. Pretty much, yes. But when you’re someone who pays very close attention to sex scenes because you’re of the opinion they can have artistic value, as well as conveying the author’s views on sexuality, I come away with “is fingering what Oseman thinks young adults do?”. Anyways. Something I noticed.

[Okay sex repulsed people, you’re good. No in depth descriptions beyond this point, just the word “sex”.]

I should’ve titled this section “In Defense of Rooney Bach” because oh this poor girl. Oh you are just there to be gawked at.

First off, let’s begin in a good place: this book always has to clarify it isn’t slutshaming its characters, followed by slutshaming its characters. Rooney is, for the uninitiated, very sexually active. Georgia’s envy often leads to a judgemental, close minded view of Rooney that often pins her sex life as “too much” – something many sexually active women get villainized for. It strikes me immediately how Rooney is constantly picked on for her sexuality as a woman in ways no male characters who aren’t asexual either are treated. None of the men she flirts with or spends time with are reprimanded or “held to account” by the book; Rooney alone is breaking the rules. Rooney’s descriptions are often bookended with a disclaimer that she isn’t being called a slut, she’s just like one, which… This is slutshaming. You can’t just say you aren’t doing it to not be doing it.

Rooney is also a victim of a very arophobic trope, and one that is also misogynistic: the Broken Woman. Why is Rooney sexually active? A rough breakup that broke her heart and makes her fear intimacy on account of potentially being wrong again. Sure, sex feels good, but explicit focus is made on the fact she is only not engaging with romance because she tried and it didn’t work. For a few chapters, admittedly I was hoping for a book where an aroace and aroallo can get past some differences and expand each other's worldviews; what I got was Georgia thinking pretty poorly of Rooney through unaddressed envy and sex negativity, and Rooney being made to only like hookups because she’s messed up. Because of course a woman could only enjoy that if she had a negative experience that forced her on the path!

Also, another scene I didn’t like was Georgia and Pip watching Rooney have sex while she is completely unaware of their presence? Jason leaves as soon as he notices, but the two of them watch before Pip makes a comment on how disgusting it is and Georgia agrees. I’m shocked at how little this is brought up as being violating or creepy. 

If it was a better book, I would have expected it to result in some kind of furthered conversation about boundaries; it could've been a place for Georgia to start establishing what she likes and dislikes, starting with Rooney preferably keeping her out of her sex life when she’s able. Instead, this event gets brought up solely for jokes, and for a motivation for Pip to start hating Rooney, despite her insistence it wasn't because of the hookup and she isn’t slutshaming. Always a great sign when that needs to be clarified. This is a PSA for everyone: you should not need to clarify you aren’t trying to slutshame. If you feel the need to do so, you are probably being sex negative. 

This book isn’t very fond of sexually active people, nor is it kind to characters that are. I can understand why being asexual and sex repulsed is representation people would want, but I also think there’s many, many ways to write it without making it an exercise in shame.

Ironically Kinda Arophobic In Some Parts

This is a short section of a thing I noticed, hated, and had as a contributing factor for my ending early: this book loves aphobic tropes. There’s already the trope against aroallos of not needing romance because of being broken into only liking sex, but also the problem with Pip and Rooney.

I’m a lesbian, for clarification, and I’m saying from experience that I hate the archetype of the angry, jealous lesbian. It’s everywhere. It’s in this book. Pip, upon even the idea of being rejected, starts berating and demeaning the girl who turned her down, even if she was only turned down in her head. The book passes it off as a lighthearted, funny story that Pip got so mad at an ex-crush she was suspended for throwing an apple at their head. Why do I bring this up?

Is it not ringing any bells that this is arophobic? That a character so hostile to romantic rejection is treated as a joke? Many, many aros, and queer people in general, have experienced violence for turning down someone. It’s a serious issue for aros and a real fear in rejecting someone. I found it incredibly hard to read and sit through as everybody passes off Pip’s tendencies to do this to the women that reject her as a silly, funny Pip moment and not a major issue for the aspec community. I don’t care if it’s enemies to lovers, because it doesn’t really feel good to read at all. The only tension is built off the back of something I’ve experienced in real life and many others have as well. 

Lovelessness: The Insecurity Unaddressed

This book, despite its title, is obviously about a loving character. Many people might not see this as a problem: first off, loveless doesn’t always mean the same thing, and second, many aroaces express feeling loveless when coming to terms with their identity. Here’s my rebuttal.

One: Georgia fits no definitions of the label. She subscribes to none of the beliefs. She loves her friends actively and sees their relationship as more than romance or sex, as something greater to her.

Second, this is because anti-loveless rhetoric is everywhere and all over this book. Not once is it suggested Georgia could live as loveless, or truly be without love. In the end, she is surrounded by it, simply learning to accept friendship instead. The way her insecurity isn’t met with “you’re complete as you are”, and instead with “you can still be complete if you simply fill the void with friends”, is anti-loveless. Nobody is allowed to be whole on their own without a subplot where their doubts are reinforced or they’re explicitly made to be broken inside.

This is shockingly common, and always sad every time I see it. Many aspects fear being loveless, as if it is a curse or blight they must cleanse. This book is one example out of many, but it doesn’t make it less hurtful when a book that runs against everything your community stands for [self-acceptance and the optionality of love] bears your name regardless. It is a book for people who are afraid of loneliness, and it answers their insecurities with “you’re right. You do need other people. You just need to find a way to still find and have a life partner!”. This is damaging to loveless people, especially those questioning an aplatonic identity.

Again, it’s not unique to Loveless. But, it’s reflective of a broader issue of aplatonics who may be seeking community constantly being presented with “you ARE broken, but friendship can fix you!”, a “solution” many can’t use, and often leads to even more self-hatred.

That’s about it from the aspec side of things. If you got this far, congrats! The rest is opinions on the writing, and the bingo card finale. You can drop off here if that’s all you came for.

Writing Problems, Oh My!

This is veering into heavy personal opinion, so, I will remind you: I don’t usually like YA, but YA can be a very good genre! I do not think this book is a good representation of what good YA looks like.

The writing quality is one of the hardest things to get past, because of a major problem I observed: Oseman is better at comics. This isn’t so much a vilification as a recommendation that it would’ve been much better suited for a different type of media. This kind of “media dysphoria” is present in many of the ways the book operates: many scenes would flow perfectly well in a visual piece. Georgia’s inner monologue has a tendency to jump suddenly into scenes and interrupt the action in a way that would be perfectly natural as a narration bubble put over a drawing of the scene around her. There are entire pages of just… text messages that would be much better suited to a visual medium where you could make these dialogue bits look much more interesting through different shots, or drawing what the background would look like on a screen [The Girl from the Sea does this well, for example]. 

There’s also the fact I cannot place in my mind if I'm too old for this novel. A lot of the jokes boil down to “hah! Sex!” in a way that instantly alienates me from the writing. The jokes can be pretty juvenile and repetitive, and serve to be the equivalent of a comedian saying “eh? Get it? That was a joke.” six times. 

This isn’t to mention the fact many of these characters are complete cardboard. Sorry. Jason does not need to exist. When he appears in a scene, he is ignored or completely leaves it on his own. He really only serves to drive Georgia’s character forward, rather than have one of his own. I found myself forgetting he was present in a scene at all until he spoke again and reminded me of his existence. The book would practically be unchanged if Georgia temporarily dated Pip and Jason was never a factor, plus or minus the Shakespeare Soc plot. 

Many interesting characters suffer from severe Pamphlet Effect syndrome. Most of the girls do. In a better novel, they would be more in depth, but Loveless doesn’t really afford them this luxury. I need to take the girls very far away from this novel, okay. I need someone to write a version of Loveless where they have personalities. There’s crumbs there. Please, someone make a loaf of bread out of it. They deserve it.

Another thing, but minor: the breakneck pacing at some points followed by slow slogs of not a lot happening contributes to the reading issues. You may thing something would be dwelled on, just for it to go flying away into the sunset as 3 more things happen and then one problem lasts for 2 chapters. I found it very hard to catch up with Loveless, while other parts I felt like I was constantly waiting for it to catch up with me instead.

The Final Frontier: The Bingo Card Returns

And without further ado, the Loveless and Tired Bingo Card for Loveless by Alice Oseman! Completed with help from other readers braver than I.

[Image ID: A bingo card made from a basic template. It has no title, and all the text is black on a white background. Some squares are marked with a blue X, while others are marked with a red scribble. The marked squares are: “Not prioritizing friendship treated as freak behaviour”, “Jab at loveless sex thrown in”, “Something about not being like THOSE people”, “Universal type of love is laid on thick”, “The answer to all your problems is finding some pals”, “Found family ending”, “Platonic-romantic binary”, “Love still treated as universal [free]”, “Friendship is more wholesome or pure”, “Amatonormativity BAD [platonormativity is my bestie]”, “Platonic love being more powerful or sumn”, “You still love your friends though, right?”, “Friendship saves the day”, “Still thinks you need dedicated people to survive”, “Being alone treated as worst thing in the world”, and “Friendships are more stable than partnerships anyways”. The unmarked, blank squares are: “Something about "players" and pickup artists where no commitment is villainized”, “Character fears being loveless and is kinda aplphobic about it”, “Aspec double standards [one is normal, one is weird]”, “You still love your FAMILY, right???”, “QPRs mentioned by no nuance given to their diversity”, “Friendship forced upon a character against their will”, “Comment about some people being inhuman gets brushed past”, and “Simply prioritise your family instead!!” /End ID]

Would I recommend this book? Uh. No! Well. Yes, but not as a good book for aspecs. I’d recommend it solely to read it yourself and form your own opinions. But, no, I would not recommend it to any aspecs I know, especially not loveless ones, aplatonic ones, aroallos, or if they're an aroace looking for support.

Ah, Loveless, how you vexx me. Never again. See you in the next, much shorter post.

[anincompletelist]

[ vol i | vol ii | vol iii | vol iv ]

happy january friends! :D

there have been a crazy number of wonderful fics that I have had time to catch up on this month, and I've saved a few for next month's rec as well!

as always, please remember to leave kudos and a comment if you enjoyed the fic or show support in other ways, and be kind! mind the tags and if you come across something you dislike, please kindly (and quietly) move on.

this turned out to be a bit of a long one! I hope everyone has had a wonderful start to the new year so far, and happy reading y'all! <3

+

it's a kind of magic | Jaistiel | E | 82k

Henry, the man who had asked if Alex's magic hurt him before asking if he used it for evil things. Henry, the man who seemed terrified of his magic, but also held a level of awe and wonder about it. Henry, the man who was likely scared out of his mind to share a tent with someone capable of the things Alex could do, but was offering anyway. "Alex." He watched as Henry's eyes widened with shock, his jaw dropping open just enough for his full lips to form a small, perfect 'o' shape. "If you're asking me to share your tent and your blankets, I guess you should at least know my name."

+

you can see it with the lights out | weathersriley | G | 3k

"Alex thinks of the water. Of feeling like he might never reach the surface, might never reach Henry. But Henry is here; Alex remembers falling asleep in the glow of his presence, and beneath his shaking fingers, Henry’s chest is warm and his heart is beating steadily and Henry is here. Alex is afraid, but Henry is here."

+

Dream A Little Dream Of Me | @affectionatelyrs | T+ | 9k

They’re no longer in the garden. There’s no grass, no flowers, no fireflies. Only stars—hundreds upon hundreds of them in an otherwise vast sea of darkness, dazzling and twinkling and here. “How—” “They came here for you,” Alex says, his voice light. “It’s what you desired. So, I asked them to come and shine. Just for you.” “But won’t the world need them?” Alex shrugs and simply says, “You need them more.” [Or, Five times Alex visits Henry in his dreams during his dark days, and one time he does so in the real world (and stays)]

+

if I do not have (your) love, I am nothing | @read-and-write- | M | 9k

The church says that sin keeps you away from God. Your disobedience is to remain hidden and only admitted during confession. The greater the sin, the greater your penance should be, and God, as the loving God he is, will forgive you. Because God is love, and he’s the greatest expression of it. Love thy neighbor is the greatest mandate of all. Yet, when Alex loves, his love is seen as perverse, impure. The greatest sin he has committed was to fall in love with another man, who has lain by his side during countless nights. But when Alex looks at Henry, he finds nothing reprehensible, nothing unclean. Instead, he finds the truest form of worship held between his arms, trailing fingertips that climb up Henry’s spine as a litany of words spill out from his mouth. A room consecrated by each whisper of God’s name, said so reverently that no one would dare say they have taken His name in vain. [A character study of Alex, religion, divinity and love.]

+

sea of endless hope | acastle | E | 65k+

Henry watches Alex, the man he adores and loves so ardently, and the moment is palpable, delicate, and yet too large for even the sky to contain. He watches Alex, and in that moment, he wants to be his husband, the ache and urge of it almost unbearable. “Daddy!” Nena takes Henry’s hands, and he looks down at her, the angel who had saved him, and he smiles at her, quiet with emotion, letting her lead him into place. He would follow her, follow Alex, anywhere. (Henry, Alex, and their daughter, and the first years of coming home, forever.)

+

I wake up with your memory over me (and that's a real fucking legacy) | @coffeecatsme | E | 21k

The ski instructor stops in front of him, takes off his goggles, and Henry about stops breathing for another reason. “Hey,” Alexander says with a grin, his face distinctly lacking in wrinkles Henry was expecting from a renowned instructor. There’s a bright grin on his face that rivals the sun, rich brown curls spilling out of a red beanie, and Henry realizes he’s absolutely fucked for a whole other reason than his inability to figure out how to stay upright in skis.  [Or, the one in which Henry is hopeless at skiing despite his family's aspirations, and Mary hires Alex as an instructor to amend that.]

+

Praise and Supplication | @nocoastposts | E | 3k

Alex is always moving, always going, always seeking. He is defiance and brashness tinged with anxiety, but not in these moments. Henry pins him down with a gaze as heavy as his touch, and all of Alex’s motions cease. He is calm, he is obedient, he is pliable. He knows he’ll be broken apart piece by piece, sending waves of heat deep into his core. [When Alex gets stuck in his head, Henry helps him let go.]

+

Room for Rent (Sex Dungeon Not Included) | @everwitch-magiks | E | 19k

When Alex comes, he only knows two things: that he’s good, and that he’s Henry’s. And that’s all he needs to know. Alex’s housemate has a sex dungeon. It’s pretty much exactly what you’d expect; whips and bondage gear and a chair that looks like something a gynecologist would have use for. Alex, being the chill, sex-positive guy he is, is of course extremely cool with this. Totally normal about it. Enthusiastically supportive, even. But as Alex watches Henry invite a steady stream of men into his dungeon, he develops one tiny little issue with the arrangement: he desperately wants to take their place.

+

stolen glances with a string attached | @wordsofhoneydew | T+ | 6k

Henry’s eyes widen, his body tensing up in sheer humiliation. That’s when he sees a sly smirk make its way to the man’s lips, and it only makes the embarrassment course through his body more rapidly, feeling all the blood rush to his cheeks. The man then spins around in his office chair, reaching for what looks to be a piece of paper and a pen. He scribbles on it for a swift moment before pressing the paper up against his office window. The paper reads, “TAKE A PIC,” written in sloppy, bubble-like handwriting just barely legible enough for Henry to read. The man grabs another paper and writes for a moment longer, this time reading, “JK” with a winky face. Henry cocks an inquisitive eyebrow in his direction, the embarrassment slowly morphing into curiosity as the man turns the paper over for Henry to read the other side. “ALEX.” [An AU in which two men fall in love through their office windows]

+

two is better than one | @bigassbowlingballhead | E | 8k

“You’ve thought about being with two of me, baby?” Alex teases, “Are you sure you can handle that?” he smirks. “I can’t say the thought hasn’t crossed my mind.” Henry says matter of factly. “Not that it’s even fathomable.” “What if it could be…”

+

love left a permanent mark | @hypnostheory | E | 10k

Henry clears his throat and answers again. “I’m a bit nervous. About the needles.” “Thank you for telling me,” Alex says, voice dipping low. Henry wouldn’t move from his spot on the couch if the apartment was on fire. “People aren’t afraid of the needle. They’re afraid of the pain. But you’re not scared of that, right?” [Henry decides to get a tattoo. It comes with more than one kind of aftercare.]

+

Grounded In Fact | @england-would-fall | E | 5k

When Georgetown grad student Henry's and Alex's flights home are cancelled for bad weather, they secure the last room at a nearby hotel. Henry Fox, facing the prospect of sharing a bed with his roommate/love of his life/friend he has never confessed his feelings to, enters into an epic state of Gay Panic (tm). Come on in and watch as Henry Who Is Experiencing The Greatest Tragedy Since The Burning Of Alexandria navigates this very real and not at all in-his-head crisis.

+

kitchen confidential | @dumbpeachjuice | T+ | 4k

The NDA is approximately a mile long. “Jesus fuck,” Alex splutters. “What, is their favourite film The Menu or something? Am I gonna come out of this one alive?” [Or, the one where Alex is hired to cater a private dinner party for Prince Henry and his friends, and it does not go as he expects.]

+

Newton's Fourth Law | dilfpickles | E | 26k

In which Alex meets his new very attractive roommate through Reddit, downloads Grindr, and discovers some things about himself and his roommate in the process.

+

Knowing me, knowing you | phlebotinxm | E | 8k

It wasn’t like the thought crept up on him by surprise. It had come in waves, like white salty water spread upon the shore and leaving little bits of foam and dust for people to see, like an idea Henry couldn’t quite shake that seemed to bleed into every era of their lives. It stayed at the back of his mind as he got up in the morning, and pulsed against his temple when he fell asleep. [In which, upon discovering something he’d never imagined about his father, Henry realizes that he is ready to take the next big step in his and Alex’s relationship.]

+

All the Lonely Starbucks Lovers | @kiwiana-writes | E | 5k

“That floor doesn’t look like it’s very comfortable on your knees, is all.” Henry leans forward, scooping out a piece of brownie that got under the counter, somehow. “I wouldn’t worry about that—my knees are quite used to it, I assure you.” A ringing silence follows this pronouncement, during which Henry focuses very hard on opening a trap door directly into hell with the power of his mind. [Or, five times Henry puts his foot in his mouth in front of his customer crush, and one time he puts his dick in his customer crush's mouth instead doesn't.]

+

The Consequences (Of Our Actions) series | @anchoredarchangel | E | 78k+

"I sort of came out as bisexual to both Nora and myself when we were watching that fucking snoozefest of a Royal Wedding years ago, and I told her with no hesitation that you were on my list.” Suddenly, Henry looks very present in this previously one-sided conversation, eyes boring into him even if he sounds a little choked as he clarifies, “I was on-” “My No Consequences sex list,” Alex confirms brazenly, “Yeah." [Or: During an inadvisable spot of dating years back, Alex and Nora made a game out of making extensive lists of celebrities they could hook up with without it being cheating. One breakup and several years later, Alex meets someone on his list for the very first time at a charity gala and decides it's appropriate to tell him all about it.]

+

Burnt Offering | justice fortheJ14magazine | G | 9k

He just needs to get through washing his hair. Simple. Except washing his hair has never been simple. It’s the polar opposite, actually. The more he thinks about the task set out in front of him, the more daunting and impossible it feels. His limbs feel like lead and the weight of the hot water pouring over him makes his head buzz. But Alex can do this. He’s done it before. A shower after a long lacrosse game or that one time he had the flu and had to stop three times to sit under the water and collect himself. He can handle a little finals week exhaustion. He has to. [Or, Alex’s hair care routine is elaborate, he struggles to let Henry help him, and he learns some important things about receiving love through service.]

+

Ho for the Holidays | @whimsymanaged | E | 6k

“Listen, don’t worry about this,” Henry says quickly, already mentally crafting the passive-aggressive text he’s going to send Pez. “Better luck next year. I’ll just be off—“ “Hold your damn horses.” Alex stops Henry with a fast, surprisingly gentle hand to his wrist. His eyebrows furrow. “What did you put on your questionnaire?” Henry’s ears go hot. “That’s none of your business.” Alex scoffs and leans in closer. “Baby, we matched. It’s safe to say we have at least some interests in common. Be honest—was it because you confessed to having a secret desire to slap me?” [Or, Pez organizes an event called Ho for the Holidays, and these two idiots get paired up.]

--

see you all soon! :D

sarah / anincompletelist xx

[supernotnatural2005]

Abbie!!

No, that’s not my question - I just wanted to instil the screech I felt after chapter 3 of Snickerdoodles 😁

I’ve been inspired by a mutual moot - a moooot if you will - to terrorise my fellow moooots and send random asks, and that’s now fallen to you - yay!

Here’s something random, but hopefully fun. You don’t have to answer, but understand I went to Canva for this, and worked painstakingly hard for all of five minutes on the below image…

Please pair up the lovely Friends ladies with our Supernatural men, and tell me your reasonings behind the pairings. Who makes the cuter couple? Who will last?

(seriously, no pressure) - Beth 😘 💋

You’re not going to let me live that down are you? 🤣🤣

But, Oooh i love this, this is fun!! And exceptional work that 👆🏻😜

(You’re always welcome to ask me anything btw 🤗)

Now to the question…

Not gonna lie, this was a big head scratcher for me, but i think i’m happy with my choices...? 😅 And also be prepared, I went in deep 😂

Monica & Dean

(I will forever ship Mondler, of course, but for the sake of the ask, i have to)

Reasons: Monica and Dean are both highly competitive, obsessive about things they love (food for her, cars and classic rock for him), but they're also secret softies despite their usual "tough" exteriors. They also both seem to take on a caretaker role in their friend groups—Monica as the mom friend and Dean as the protective older brother figure.

Also, Monica had grown up always feeling second-best to Ross, being constantly criticised by her parents etc, as well as her own insecurities of never finding true love. And of course we know Dean carries a similar burden, but his stems more from being raised as the protector of his family, conditioned to believe his worth was tied to how well he could take care of others. Namely Sammy.

I feel like they’d recognise that pain in each other, offering reassurance in a way neither has fully accepted before. Plus, Monica’s love for cooking and Dean’s love for eating? It's like match made in heaven. 😂

Sam & Rachel

Reasons: Now we all know Ms. Rachel Green has a thing for the nerds. (No offence to Ross but Sam is a hot nerd) 😉. But also for the fact, Rachel and Sam are both the ones who break away from their family expectations and carve out their own paths. Rachel left her rich, spoiled life to become independent, just like Sam left the hunter lifestyle to try and be normal. They’re both charming, a little dramatic, and have an undeniable level of growth throughout their respective series.

I feel like Sam would admire Rachel’s determination and growth, while Rachel would appreciate Sam’s intelligence and kindness. And of course, his good looks too. 😆 They’d be that sophisticated, good-looking couple that seems like they have their lives together (even when they don’t). 🫣

Cas & Phoebe

Reasons: Of course the obvious is that, Phoebe and Cas are both the quirky outsiders of their groups, but also have starkly different personalities, unless we count Endverse!Cas. Now that would be fun lol!

But I feel like Cas would be fascinated by Phoebe’s free-spirited, mystical/hippie-like nature, and she’d be intrigued by his odd stotic mannerisms and his obscure annotations on life.

They also both have that air of mystery—Phoebe with her chaotic storytelling, that you can never be sure is real or not, and Cas being, well, an angel. I feel like she’d help him loosen up, (in every way 😜) and he’d give her a level of deep, unwavering support that deep down she’s always craved.

They’d be this weird, chaotic, but oddly sweet pair that confuses everyone around them, but ultimately it'd be a crazy fun dynamic. 🤪

I probably just waffled a helluva lot here 😅, but I guess that's my take on it. I'd love to know your opinion and if you see it differently? 🤔

And thank you for the ask Beth, you really had my brain working for this one 😆, loved it though ❤️

[iridessence]

Would love to hear about you two ! What do you love about him? What made you say yes?

I guess aside from mutual attraction and good sex, I just have never felt better about myself in the context of a romance. from the start of our romantic relationship, things just felt easy, light and normal. I didn’t feel this fear in my gut that my feelings would not be reciprocated or that my time would be wasted, and like… I felt that way naturally. I didn’t have to convince myself that he was interested in me, he made it clear with words and actions.

He was very generous from the start and has maintained that generosity, and he actually listens to, understands and cares about the same systemic things I do, on every level, and those things were important to him long before we ever met. His work intersects mental health and immigration for undocumented people which I think is incredible. Our beliefs very much align.

He thinks my interests in style and history are really cool and actually the first weekend we met, he escorted me to meet a soon-to-be friend of mine for a historical costume meetup, and her husband was with her and they kind of fell in line to chat as like the dudes behind the ladies in big costumes, so that was a great test and he had a couple other unofficial auditions around my friends that weekend which he aced and has continued to ace.

He loves and supports my burlesque work, which I think actually makes a lot of men uncomfortable. They’re typically put off at worst or disinterested at best, but he goes to my shows and will often help out, insists on carrying my bags, and everyone knows him to be chill and helpful and a great tipper. And there’s been times when audience members have gotten out of pocket and he’s always at the ready to put himself in between them and the performers and de-escalate as needed.

We’ve lived together for a year now and we both spend most days at home, as he works from home and unless I’m gigging or out for social things, then I’m at home, and I used to wonder what that would look like but… We just simply haven’t gotten bored of each other. I go out for a few hours and then I’m excited to see him when I get home, or he works in his office and then he’s excited to come hang out with me after he’s done, and we give each other space is needed. He’s also just really good about communicating his feelings or letting me know he will take space when he needs to sort them out, if we’ve had a disagreement or if one of us has peeved the other.

I know it’s kind of corny, but he really is my best friend. It was hard to understand how that’s real with couples until i found it.

That’s not everything, but those are some highlight points for sure.

[krirebr]

Congrats again on your well deserved milestone, lovely! 🥳❤️

If it sparks the muse, I would LOVE a drabble of WAM!Steve and Cole. I was so intrigued by their first part and how you wrote their dynamic and how Steve was a low key motherhen. I’d love to see more of him teaching Cole how to vampire!! Thank you! 🙏🏻

Thank you, Siri!! I so appreciate your support. 💜💜

Oh, the muse sparked hard. I wrote this one in a blink. Their dynamic is so fun for me. I hope you enjoy!

This is a few years after Steve takes Cole in.

And Gentle Persuasion

Characters: Dark!Steve Rogers, Soft!Dark Cole Turner

Warnings: blood, death, mind control, talk of humans as food, vampire stuff

We're All Monsters

“Cole.”

Cole looked up from where he was kneeling over the dead body. Steve was leaning against the door to the small cell, looking exasperated. Cole grimaced. “I don’t know how this happened,” he said.

Steve sighed and crouched down in front of him. “Yes, you do,” he said. “Tell me what happened this time.”

Cole stroked a finger down the now-dead young man’s cheek. “I just– I told him I loved him and wanted us to be together, you know? I wanted him to be mine. And he freaked out and I was just trying to calm him down, and maybe feed on him just a little, to show him how good it could be, but I was upset too. That he was being so unreasonable. And I guess I lost control.” He gestured to the blood that covered him and the floor of the cell.

Steve closed his eyes for a moment and took a breath. When he opened his eyes again, he fixed Cole with a stern look. “So,” he said, “the same thing as last time. Why didn’t you just compel him to agree to it?”

Cole looked down, embarrassed. “I wanted it to be real.”

“Honey, we’ve talked about this. You’re still trying to hang onto your humanity, but it’s gone. You aren’t human anymore, you’re something so much better. You need to start acting like it, finally embrace it. Humans, they’re just animals. They’re food. Pets at the very most. They are here to serve us. We want something from them, we take it. Any vampire who treats them as equals has lost touch with what we are. Do you understand?”

Cole nodded. He did. Or he was trying to. Steve had been over it with him so many times. Cutter, too. Everyone here, really. But. He’d just– he’d always wanted to find the one when he’d been human and he never had. He thought maybe now that he was something more, that power was thrumming through his veins and Steve had taught him how to harness it, that he’d finally be able to find someone. But he still hadn’t. Maybe Steve was right, maybe he was looking in the wrong place.

Steve placed a gentle hand on Cole’s cheek, pulling him from his thoughts. “You know I’m only this upset because you keep doing this to menu items. We won’t have anything left to serve at the bar at this rate.”

Cole leaned into Steve’s hand. “I know,” he whispered. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright, sweetheart,” Steve said and stood up. “Come on, I’ll have someone come clean this up.”

Cole stood up too and started to leave the cell, not looking back at the body. “Cutter’s gonna be pissed.”

Steve smiled, “Cutter’s always pissed. You leave her to me.” Cole took a few steps into the hallway before Steve stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. “Hey, if it’s just a feed and a fuck you need, you come to me and I’ll get it for you. You know I’ll always take care of you.”

Cole gave him a bashful grin back. “Yeah, I know,” he said and thought for the millionth time how lucky he was that Steve had been the one to find him.

Kris's 700 Celebration

Tag lists are open

@stargazingfangirl18 @yenzys-lucky-charm @thezombieprostitute @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @bval-1 @km-ffluv @texmexdarling @ladyvenera @roxyfan14-blog @darkserenity24 @femefetalelevelingup @moonlightttfae @lokislady82

[us3rnam3-r3dact3d]

eeee

hi, so ummmm, OW! that was my heart you stabbed with that chapter, stars above!!

i love the detail of Darlin feeling like their jacket is a kind of armor, i just think that’s such a cool way to think of their attachment to the jacket in both the canon and your AU!! 

Quinn’s method of manipulation is so horrific, “He had never tried to hide it. What he had done was convinced you that you deserved it.” OUCH, stars this hurt. this line made me think of Quinn in the confirmation audio where he’s like “Everything i did was at your request,” just reinforcing t victim blaming. i have never wanted to punch someone’s face in so bad. It just makes me sad to think of how, not only isolated he made Darlin feel, but how destructive and broken he made them feel. 

once again, can we please give Darlin a hug???? 

“You did what you did best. You turned that grief into anger.” this line, to me, genuinely is so perfect for Darlin. i’ve said this before but so many people just characterize them as vengeful and angry and reckless, but they aren’t! At all!!! they’re just a hurt person trying to keep themself safe, but above all, keep those around them safe. Darlin has always been a favorite listener of mine, but your fic has just elevated my love for them. If no one gives them a hug, I sure as hell will.

Quinn is so smug, i swear, him bragging to have been stalking them even while they were at Sam’s, stars how traumatizing. 

“It was always going to end up like this.” He said softly, not looking away from the screen. “You know that, don’t you?” 

“Yeah,” you said softly, “I guess so.”

this chapter is just gut punch after gut punch. OW. Again, he is so smug and sure of himself. someone please humble him. hit him with another car. Give me the keys and i’ll do it for stars sake.

the detail of how they always pushed the emotions down whenever they were with Quinn just goes to show how they were always walking on egg shells around him. they couldn’t show any weakness or it would be abused. Your writing of their character and the nuances of their trauma around Quinn is just phenomenal. you make them feel so real and your writing feels so personal when it comes to their character. I said it earlier in this, but because of your writing, their character just feels so real! you make all the redacted characters feel real and that’s something so special.

“I don’t deserve this!” You spat. “I don’t deserve this shit!” 

OH MY STARS LETS GO!!! no! you don’t deserve this! the way i cheered aloud at this line. They have come so far, and i’m so happy they’re able to finally recognize their worth. It makes me so so happy to see their progress and how their rebuild support system has helped them see their worth.

such a good line. 10/10. AMAZING writing.

and Sam still waiting for them, gahhhhhhh my heart can’t take it. it got a beating this chapter. He knows them, he knows their anger and sharp words were a defense mechanism, i know it. And him welcoming them back with open arms, yeah, imma just go cry in a corner for a bit. 

i’m terrified for what Quinn is going to do in retribution. there’s no way he’s just going to be like “oh, they told me to F off, guess i’ll go away now,” i feel like he’s going to see that his control on them, his hold on their mind and sense of sense, is breaking: his main control tactic of convincing people they deserve his abuse isn’t working on them anymore, and i’m scared he’s going to do something drastic because of it, that he’s going to do pull something in a last ditch effort to get them back under his control.

aaaaaaaaaaaimnotokaybutthisisfineaaaaaaaa

all in all, an amazing chapter, such an emotional roller coaster, (i feel like vincent with how much it emotionally destroyed me) your writing is so so wonderful, thank you for sharing it with us!!!

have a good day, night, or evening!

-🌃

I do my best to torture you guys! My fav thing to do in writing is write stuff that physically hurts me, and these few chapters definitely hit the mark!

That detail is actually based on how I feel about my own patch jacket! I've had it since high school just like Darlin and it has been well loved. I wear it to pride and bars and everywhere I need a little courage. Plus I liked the idea of them drawing comfort from something that Quinn teases them about.

I mean they for sure would not let you hug them, they barely let Sam hug them, but you can certainly try!!

Yes!!! Exactly!! They are not a naturally violent creature. They were made this way, warped. And what is so FUCKED UP about this moment is that they are HEALING!! They are getting better!! And in this moment they slide right back into who they used to be. It's terrifying for them. And it is... comfortable. That's why they resorted back to that when Sam pushed them.

Yeaaaahhhh he really wants to drive home that they never escaped him, even if they felt that they had. He wanted to tell them that he had been there in their most vulnerable moments. And that he'd seen Sam in that same state.

He very much feels like this is 100% inevitable, that there was no world in which they pulled away. It's hubris for sure and I promise that he will pay for it.

Darlin learned quickly that, when it came to Quinn, showing emotion was an invitation for harm. So they learned how to push it all down. It's not helpful now, not now that they're trying to open up to others. But it's shown to be a skill that they can use when they encounter Quinn again.

LETS GO DARLIN KNOWING THEIR WORTH!!!!

Of course Sam is still waiting for them. He wouldn't let a little thing like them not loving him stop him from being there for them.

Of my friend, the next chapter is up, and you can see exactly what Quinn does in retaliation.

Thank you so much for reading and I'm so sorry it's taken me so long to get back to you! Life has been crazy busy but good. I hope you enjoyed the new chapter as well!!

[milkyplier]

@skyward-floored here you go :3

Heavy.

Skylor sighs as gently as she possibly can, so as not to disturb a deeply sleeping Kai. He’s leaning against her, head on her shoulder and body pressed against her own. Which means she is unfortunately the only thing keeping him upright. She considers just standing up and letting him fall—he was heavy, heavier than she expected, and while Skylor was strong, she wasn’t strong enough to find supporting him a cakewalk, and it would be funny.

He had promised not to fall asleep while they were watching movies, so it would be payback for breaking his promise, but something stops her. She watches his expression, which, in its relaxed state, betrays how exhausted he really is. He has eye bags Skylor would otherwise assume were bruises, and despite his young age, there’s something about that deeply-engrained fatigue that makes him look older.

She frowns as his eyebrows crease and his face assumes a pained expression. There’s a few seconds of silence before he jerks back, and—sitting upright, lax and no longer supported—almost falls of the couch they’re sitting on. Skylor is quick to steady him, and decide nap time is over.

“Hey, hey, Kai. Wake up.” She says softly, shaking him a little. It’s enough to wake him up, and he blinks at her. For a moment, just a second while he stares with wide eyes, she see the pain and panic written there. It disappears quickly with a slightly strained smile, and Skylor wonders if it’s real or if he’s just really good at hiding how he feels.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” he says hurriedly, “I must have been more tired than I thought.” He’s still smiling, but Skylor sees him look around the room, and then at the television screen with an almost bleary expression, trying to orient himself.

“We were watching Legally Blonde, right?” He asks. “Did I miss a lot of it? Last I remember, Elle was practicing for the LSATs. Let me find the remote so I can skip—“

“What’s wrong?” It comes out a lot stronger than Skylor thought it would, but she’s glad for it. Kai’s smile falters.

“What do you mean?” He chuckles, but it’s too tired, too anxious.

“You’ve been…quiet…lately.” Skylor says. “And abnormally tired. You fell asleep while we were watching a movie. You never fall asleep during movies I ask you to watch.”

Kai’s smile returns, and it’s supposed to be reassuring, but all Skylor sees is the weight behind it.

“Yeah, we’ve just been training harder lately.” Kai says. “Wu tends to get pretty strict when he thinks we’ve gotten lazy, so he’s been working us to the bone.”

It’s a lie. Skylor doesn’t know his training schedule, but she can tell that this is a lie. She adjust in her seat, so that they’re no longer cuddled together and she can look him straight in the eye.

“Don’t lie to me. I’m worried about you, Kai.”

Kai seems to think it over for a second. That smile, that fake, heavy smile keeps for another few seconds before it begins to fade. The spark in his eye does do. He breaks her gaze, looking at the floor.

“I’m just…m’just…tired.” His voice has a slight wobble. “Years of saving Ninjago caught up with me, I guess. I’ve always been able to stay ahead of it, but in the lull after getting Nya back, I just…I just…”

His voice breaks. He leans back against the cough and looks up, rubbing his hands over his face roughly.

“Screw that, I’m exhausted. You know, I go outside every day and I see people, people who love me and people who hate me and everywhere I go, someone wants a picture or an autograph or they just glare at me like I’m the reason their lives are falling apart. And…maybe I am, maybe I just didn’t realize it. I can’t even scroll through Chirper without seeing someone saying something about me. ‘The red ninja’s so great’ and then the next post, someone is criticizing me for something that went wrong. I don’t know, I can’t fix everything. And every day, I wake up and there’s something to do. I drag myself out of bed, and I have to face terror, death, evil. Even on the days I have off and the days where nothing happens, somehow everything I’ve seen fills in the gaps and it’s like I spent the day saving the city over and over and over again.

“And my friends…I’ve almost lost them so many times, I have lost them so many times. How could I let that happen? It wad bad enough that it happened once, but how did I let it happen again? I can’t protect them, I can’t keep them safe. I think they might hate me, but don’t show it. And Lloyd…he’s like my little brother and I can’t do anything to keep his destiny from ruining what little childhood he has in him. That child-like innocence, I see it slip away more and more everyday and I can’t do anything. And Nya—!” Kai stands up, pulling on his hair. Skylor’s heart races in her chest, but she keeps herself calm.

“My own little sister had to give herself up to save the city! I’m supposed to protect her from anything, and I—I didn’t! I couldn’t! How could I? And then when she left, she didn’t say anything to me. She looked at Jay, looked him in the eye and spoke to him but she just…she just ignored me. She forgot me. And then Jay had the audacity to act like he’d lost someone so important when that was my little sister! That was my only family! I basically raised her! I’ve been there for her her out whole lives! SHE WAS MY LIFE, AND I LOST HER!” His voice rises to a shout, and then he stands there for a solid thirty seconds. He wilts steadily until he just collapses back onto the couch. He rests his forehead on her shoulder, and somehow it’s so much heavier than it should be.

“I’m…tired.” He whispers. “I’m so tired.”

Skylor doesn’t know what to say. How could she console him? She understood what he meant, but at the same time was sure that she hadn’t understood anything at all. She feels the sting of tears in her eyes, and tries to control them. She hurts for him, she hurts so bad because he hurts and she can’t do anything to help. She doesn’t know how. But…I can always learn, right?

She shifts both of them so that he’s laying more comfortably in her lap. Her heart aches at the faint tear tracks on his face. She presses a kiss to his forehead.

“I love you.” She cards her fingers through his hair, and is pleased when he closes his eyes.

“I love you too.” His words are almost inaudible, weighed down with sorrow, but they are sincere and they mean everything to Skylor.

“I’ll unpause the movie, and you just lay here. Sleep. Today is your day off, and I won’t let your demons make it anything less.”

Kai nods, and Skylor reaches for the remote.

“I love you,” she repeats, before unpausing the movie. She keeps running a hand through Kai’s hair, and it doesn’t take long at all before he’s fallen asleep. She wakes him whenever he shows signs of nightmares, and promptly sends him to sleep again. It goes like that throughout the rest of Legally Blonde, and through many other movies. When night falls, and Skylor has a headache from watching movies, she simply puts on one of her comfort movies and falls asleep herself. She wakes up with the worst crick in her neck, but Kai wakes up without quite so much weight on his shoulders, and she sees the usual spark in his eyes.

And that makes it worth it.

[more-than-tender-curiosity]

If Nick’s family is overbearing enough that they all had to come together to allow Nick to go to New York then I’m sure they’re a pretty good family.

A snobby family, sure, but there’s love there. They hug and kiss, give gifts on Christmas, and have lovely traditions but half of the stuff out of their mouth would make you want to punch them in their face and hope they bleed.

Nick Carraway is an odd man so he must’ve been raised by an odd family. Jay Gatsby is odd enough, and anxious enough, that he’s adored by Nick’s aunts while Nick’s uncles are indifferent. Nick’s father loves him and Nick’s mother hates him. Nick’s cousins love him, their nieces don’t know what to think because Jay Gatsby doesn’t know what to do with children and panics every time he’s left alone with them, and that’s about all I can say.

Daisy is the darling of the family and Nick is like the puppy. Or, at least, in their eyes he is. They simply ignore the fact that this man is grown and has gone to war (WW1). Maybe because Jay is more of a puppy than him that’s why half of the family loves him (and the other half doesn’t because they’re cat people)

No like I totally agree about Nick’s family infantilizing him. Like he is 29 years old, a war veteran, college educated, and still has to get everybody’s opinion to move away from home despite having already done so once for college?

I guess they expected him to come home and stay home forever after New Haven.

And then his dad so automatically unsure in his ability to support himself that he just. Gives him a whole YEAR of rent and utilities and whatever? Maybe Nick will have to pay him back but still. That move has always served to betray both how comfortably wealthy Nick’s family really is (and thus Nick himself even if he’s cosplaying poor) and how little faith they have in him to serve as an active participant in his own life—to the point where he can’t hold down a relationship AND it might even have prevented him from engaging more with the whole Gatsby issue and possibly saving Jay. He can say he didn’t really care about it all at the time but we obviously know all the little context clues to prove that he did—but when you’re so unconfident in your own ability to change the world around you, why bother?

Like that’s the whole tragedy of it. Nick’s forced to reckon with the fact that he has some blame in this after a whole lifetime of people just cleaning up after him like he’s a kid and not handing him any real responsibility. He has to face that he was at least partially responsible for Myrtle and Wilson and Jay, because even if he was a passive participant, he was still a participant. It’s a reality he’s never had to face before so naturally he blamed Tom and Daisy and society and Wolfshiem and even Jay, a little bit, for being too much of a dreamer for the waking world, because he couldn’t accept that life isn’t just something that happens to you, but you are living.

That sort of avoidance doesn’t just happen, you know? His family no doubt did that to him. And I think a lot of that is Fitzgeraldian in nature.

But on the topic of COUSINS!!!!!

MAGGIE CARRAWAY STEP ON DOWN !!!!!!!!!

No I just love her. She’s Nick’s cousin in the More Than Tender Curiosity series, particularly introduced in Fugue for a Flapper. She’s the only cousin that’s close enough to Nick’s age to have ever looked up to him and she’s pretty cool. Bi queen. Aspirational girlie. Too many aspirations actually and no talent except at just being loveable. She’s like the opposite of Nick in that she tries to do too many aspirations at once and never gets good at any of them, whereas Nick is like. Trying at something (bonds) for the first time in his life (because most of his other interests are not things he feels safe pursuing, like poetry,, and men,,,.)

Yeah if you want to see a hint of my ideas at Nick and Jay’s interactions with Nick’s family, that series is a good place to start. Right on Time will include a more modern take on Nick’s interactions with his family too once a couple of them arrive for a certain event.