#i got stuck in traffic on my way home and was just tearing up thinking about how proud i was of their growth

[i-earned-my-stripes]

I can't tell if I'm just super emotional because I'm getting over being sick, or if I am just an emotional person, but I legit was fighting tears on the drive home from work today cause IM JUST SO PROUD OF MY KIDS!!!

Today was my first day back after being out for a week. Two separate bugs are sweeping through the center at the moment, and I was the only one of my coworkers who was unlucky enough to catch both at the exact same time. So my kids have had a week to grow, and usually, there isn't a lot of change in one week. BUT THESE KIDS DID SO GREAT AND IM SO PROUD OF THEM THAT IF I DONT TELL ABOUT IT I MIGHT PHYSICALLY BURST!!!!

1. One of our kiddos is a really sweet, generally gentle kid, but we have had a problem of him getting super aggressive. Granted, he almost never is the instigator, but he will start throwing hands the moment his buttons get pushed too hard. So, we've really started focusing on teaching him to use words when our friends encroach on our space, try to take our toys, etc. Last week, right before I got sick, was the first time he used his words before going to hit. It was super sweet and cute and I almost cried. I'll tell about that more in detail if interested, but TODAY!! TODAY HE SPENT THE WHOLE DAY LOUDLY SHOUTING NO AT HIS FRIENDS WHO WERE TRYING TO TAKE HIS TOYS!! AND HE DID IT MULTIPLE TIMES EACH TIME BEFORE EVEN TRYING TO HIT (by which time we were usually able to intervene).

2. One of our older ones (~18 months) is a really sweet player. He has older siblings, so this is to be expected, as younger siblings frequently learn a bit faster from watching their older siblings. Well, before I got sick, he would frequently come up to me and just pass a toy back and forth together. He'd try to do this with other friends, but would end up too upset that his friend wouldn't pass the toy back, so he doesn't do that as much anymore. Well, today, he came up to me as I was sitting on the floor with two little people, smacked them together a few times and then gave them to me. INSTEAD OF WAITING FOR ME TO TAKE MY TURN LIKE USUAL, He then turned, grabbed two animals and started smacking them together a bit. After about a minute, he turned back to me, gave me his toys and took mine and then went back to play! HE WAS A) SHOWING ME HOW TO PLAY, B) TAKING TURNS WITH MULTIPLE TOYS, AND C) ENGAGING IN PARALLEL PLAY WITH ME!!!!! NONE OF THOSE ARE USUALLY NOT SEEN UNTIL A FEW MONTHS AFTER TURNING 2!!!! AND!!!! AND!!! AND!!! He recognized that not all of his classmates are at his level and he was engaging in play with them in ways that wouldn't frustrate him. Like, he spent about 10 minutes playing chase and peekaboo and what not with one of our ~14 month olds.

3) For the two weeks before I got sick, I've consistently had a fight with one of our kiddos about washing hands. He loves washing his hands, so I don't know why it's been a fight, but he would refuse to wash his hands before and after eating. I'd have to physically bring him over to the sink and almost wrestle with him just to get him to cooperate. Again, he loves washing his hands. He'll be smiling and laughing the whole time, but I'd have to fight to get him to do so. Today? Some slight petulance and resistance, but no fight!!

[moonstruckme]

hellooo!! hope you’re doing well! So in my city whenever a drop of rain falls it’s immediately chaos, people drive worse than ever and lots of floodings happen. Today was especially rough as it was raining really bad, I got out of class at 4;30 and got home at 7, a trip that usually lasts around 20-40 min depending on traffic. I was stuck in traffic and was low on gas, the fastest way to get to a gas station was through a flooded road, though many were driving through it, it was still so scary. Literally called my mom, almost crying, not knowing if I could cross the road. Thankfully, i did cross it, praying to whatever that heard me the entire way. Got home absolutely exhausted, cramped and menstruating😆

Sooo the point is if you could do this but with poly!marauders? Where reader calls one of them up crying and they can only help her through the phone, need the angst with comfort. Tsym!!

Ugh sorry lovely, glad it worked out okay! Thank you for requesting

modern au

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 702 words

“Hello?” 

“Ask her what’s taking so long,” says Sirius, leaning towards where James sits sprawled across the loveseat and dragging Remus with him by consequence. Sirius’ cartilage piercing is infected again, and Remus has finally resorted to trapping both of his hands in his to keep him from touching it. Sirius seems to feel alternately pleased and as though he’s being held prisoner. He shouts towards the phone, “Rem won’t heat dinner without you, and I’m starving!” 

James cups the speaker protectively, cradling the phone close to his ear. “Hey, lovie,” he says, voice soft enough that the other boys both still. “What’s going on?” 

A muffled voice on the other end of the line. James’ brow pinches. 

“Alright, that’s okay. You’re okay, right? Are you somewhere safe?” 

Remus’ chest tightens. 

“Put her on speaker,” says Sirius, mouthing at first, then louder, until his voice is a shrill whisper. “Put her on speaker, James.” 

“Angel, give me just a second, okay? I’m gonna put you on speaker.” James pulls the phone away from his face, whispering hurriedly to the others. “Her tire blew on the motorway.” He clicks a button. 

“Hey, baby.” Remus can hear your stuttering breaths through the speaker, a forewarning that you’re holding back tears, and Sirius’ desperate tone is a match for them. “Are you okay?” 

Remus strokes his thumb over his boyfriend’s hand. Settle down. 

“I’m fine.” It’s a relief to hear your voice, though it reaffirms Remus’ fears, thick and slightly tremulous. “I, um, my tire blew and the car kind of went out of control, so I panicked and ended up pulling off in the shoulder of the fast lane. I keep thinking people are going to hit me.” 

Remus leans towards the phone, ignoring the twinge in his chest and summoning his surest tone. “Nobody’s going to hit you. Just keep your hazards on, they’ll go around you.” He glances outside. It’s not dark yet, but it’s getting there. “Do we still have the spare tire in the trunk?” 

“Um, I think so? I’m not sure. I’m a little bit scared to get out and check.” 

“We should go,” Sirius whispers. 

“How?” Remus asks, not unsympathetically. “She has the car, love. We can’t very well walk there.” 

“There’s no rush,” James says to you. His light tone is at odds with his terse expression, fingers wrapped tight around his phone. “You can go look for it when you feel ready.” 

Suddenly, they can hear the sounds of the motorway through the phone. You must have put them on speaker, too. Remus can picture you in the car, setting your phone in the cupholder and pulling your legs up onto your seat. When you speak, it sounds muffled, as though your voice is coming from behind your hands. “I’m really sorry. You guys should eat dinner, I think I’m going to be awhile.” 

Sirius makes a distressed sound in the back of his throat. “Hey, I was just fucking around about dinner, babydoll. Don’t worry about that. We’re all okay, yeah?”

“Okay.” You sound close to tears. 

“Sweetheart,” Remus interjects, “can you take a deep breath for me? Just take a second.” 

There’s a thick pause, the sound of your breath crackling through the speaker. Remus does it with you, trying to relax the tension in his own chest. He notices James’ shoulders drooping on your exhale, too.

“Thank you,” Remus says softly. “You’re fine, yeah? You can handle this.” 

“Yeah.” You sound frail, but better. “Sorry.” 

“What for, my love?” James asks lightly. “Seems like luck just wasn’t on your side this time, s’got nothing to do with you. Listen, I’ll talk you through changing the tire in case there’s anything you forgot, and then we can worry about you merging back on when it comes to that. There’s no rush, okay?” 

“Okay,” you say, more sure now. “Thank you. You’ll all stay on the line with me?” 

“Where else would we be, sweetness?” Sirius teases. “I always love talking to you, you know that.” 

Remus lifts Sirius' hands to his face, kissing them with a smile on his lips. For all the worry thickening the air in the room, the love is thicker.

[strayflowersstarsandlove]

You are my heart you know? (hanjisung)

Tw: anxiety, panic attack

The last few feet till you get to park in your driveway seem to last for fucking ever. You keep blinking away your tears furiously, your blurry vision getting progressively worse as you can feel the sting of your own salt and makeup and sunscreen mixing in on your eyelids, slowly dropping into your eyes. Maybe some snot mixed in it as well.

You feel gross. You're pretty certain you also look just as gross as you feel with your 3 days post wash hair tied up in a loose ponytail, your forehead shiny with sweat, your clothes sticking to you with wet stains after you had to run to catch your train back from 8 and a half exhausting hours of work.

And then it started pouring and you got stuck in the traffic on your way back home from the train station and you were always a nervous driver with or without the rain so when you foot slipped on the breaks at a last second red light and the driver behind you aggressively slammed down on the horn you just lost it.

You started crying and breathing erratically as a full blown anxiety attack threatened to overwhelm you. You had gripped the steering wheel so tight your wrists started to hurt but you didn't care, you just needed to focus ahead on the road and get home as soon as possible, you desperately tried to puff out your cheeks while breathing in and then slowly blow them out as you concentrated on breathing out, the rhythmic motion momentarily helping you calm down just long enough for you to safely reach home.

With your car now safely turned off and the hand brake set, you finally let it all out. The overflowing tears, the shaky hands, the tremble on your lips. You lean forward on the wheel and cover your face with your hands, sobbing and shaking in your seat as anxiety engulfs you at last.

Thinking it was just exhaustion at first, you presumed you were just having a bit of a meltdown from all the stress and chaos and the insomnia that had gripped your mind for over a month now, but then the spiraling over thinking took over and the awful awful feeling of being on the verge of collapsing from the inside out followed and you knew you just had been bottling in too much.

This episode was just all the other anxiety episodes combined together after weeks of repressing and pushing them back down and swallowing down the knot in your throat while at work for many more times than you can actually recollect.

The slightly distorted sound of your ringtone suddenly cuts in the relative quietness of your car and you're forced to shake off the worst of your panicky state and take a deep breath despite your chest constricting on itself and your fast heartbeat that made it feel like you could not inhale enough oxygen at a time.

"Hey baby! I can see your in the drive way, why don't you come in? ", Han's bright and chirpy voice fills your ear and for a second you smile, though the tears fly straight in your mouth and you quickly dab the back of your hand on your cracked lips, tasting the sweat and tears collecting there, "h-hi", you croack, forcing down another sob and just hoping he did not catch onto the strain in your tone.

"I'm right outside. I'm - I'm looking for something that fell from my purse, I'll be there in a sec", you add and it's all you can manage to say without sounding too sospicious before you cover your mouth once again, muffling the sound of you chocking on your own tears the best you can, "sure... Okay", Han doesn't sound too convinced on the other end of the line but he doesn't press on and the call is over before you can even click on the red phone button.

Sighing, you reach for your purse, slip your phone inside it but your hands are too shaky and it slides right down the underside of the passenger seat and even if you scramble to catch it, accidentally bumping your hand on the shift, you distinctly hear it rattle down the rails beneath the seat, the screen definitely cracking on impact and it takes all within you not to just scream your lungs out in frustration. You just cry even harder.

And it comes heavily. A downpour on your cheeks and your neck and your lap. You wail like an actual infant and loose control of your breathing as it goes spasmodic, your chest cramping and your throat burning with the effort: "alright, that's it. That's enough". Han's swift arms are around you in a millisecond.

He comes out of nowhere and you barely register what's happening, you just find yourself all pressed up against him, his arms wrapping tightly around you, "looking for something that fell from your bag ay?", he chuckles softly, a bittersweet edge to his tone as he carefully manouvers you out of your seat and then out of the car as well, not once letting go of you.

The short walk from your car to your front door feels like a daze. You can feel the rain coming down on you, your hair getting damp and wet and then your clothes becoming so heavy and freezing, your boyfriend arms never leaving your shoulders and your back, the feeling of his fingertips on your neck, something about being in a hurry spoken so softly the sound of the rain drowns it out.

Once you are both inside Han wastes no time and just throws himself at you, hugging you so tight you might just crumble into his embrace, wet hair and drenched clothes and all. Neither of you cares. He lets you cry into his neck and his shirt and his hair and doesn't complain once, he doesn't even flinch, he just quietly rubs soft circles on your back, "I know it's not okay right now, but I'm right here, I'm not leaving you, I'm never leaving you, it's going to be okay".

If the floodgates hadn't already opened hearing him talk like that makes you clutch onto him as a way to restrain yourself from crying even harder, if it was even possible, and there's a bit of relief in your cries but there's also still the bulk of unresolved panic pooling in your heaving chest.

Han knows what to do. He's done it a thousand times. Either while dealing with his own anxiety or yours, he just knows it a little too well. It's like second nature to him, he knows whether you need to be actively brought back out of the tunnel or if he just needs to stay by your side until the worst is over, it's like he can sense it before even you know what you even need him to do.

This time you did manage to survive the worst part on your own, you're not feeling completely helpless or like you're about to pass out like you did only a few moments earlier, getting out of the car and actively moving helped with that. But you are still stuck in the loophole, you are still feeling miserable and weak, with claws closing in at your throat. So he focuses on just calming you down.

He guides you on the couch, unzips his jacket and throws it over your shoulders and then he gently grabs one of your hands, rubbing each of your fingers until they stop shaking so much, "I like your hands...", he speaks softly, his eyes level with yours, "you always say how you like mine...", he sighs gently, lowering his voice jut above a whisper, "but yours are so pretty, your fingers are slender and your nails are always colorful and sparkly, I think rings look really nice on you",he continues, now holding your other hand, rubbing his fingertips around the two rings you keep on your pinky and your pointer, "I mostly like how you use your hands though. I like how gentle they are, like when you brush my hair or when you stroke my face and my shoulders".

His voice is hypnotic, his tender massage so soothing. Soon enough your breathing has gone fully back to normal, the aching in your chest is still there but it has subsided a little, your shaking has stopped, your heartbeat has slowed down. You are slowing down. You blink a few times and smile a weak, toothless smile smile at him, and he kisses your hand, from the palm to the tip of your longer middle finger, "you're feeling a little better?", he asks quietly, you nod and clear your throat, "y-yeah. Just a bit...hollow".

Han nods sympathetically for he knows exactly what you mean. Anxiety does that. It carves you out from the inside leaving you feeling so empty and exhausted, all of your senses rendered numb and cotton like after an intense, overwhelming trigger than rilled them all up.

"You should rest for a while. You must feel so tired", he offers, and you nod, already holding back a yawn, your energy does feel completely depleted now, like you could easily just sleep for 10 hours straight and still feel immensely exhausted. "How about you go and change into something warmer and then climb into bed mmh? I'll make you some sleepy time tea, that'll help".

Quietly, you drag yourself upstairs and wash up a little, making sure to really scrub your face, towel dry your rain soaked hair and spritz dry shampoo in your roots, feeling too tired to even get in the shower right now. Once you're cleaner and warmer in an oversize hoodie and pajama shorts, you climb into bed: you stretch out your arms and your legs, the tension finally leaving your limbs and as you close your eyes briefly, you feel like you can breathe again. Like you had been waiting to just lay down the whole day and now you're finally allowed to.

Except that your chest still hurts. There's a cramp there that just won't go away. A skip in your heartbeat that picks up pace a little too fast. The ominous seed of restlessness luring in the back of your head.

Han steps inside as if one cue, he's changed into comfier clothes as well and as he places a streaming mug of what looks like moon milk tea, he eyes you shifting on the mattress, spotting your hoodie as it pokes through the duvet, "that's not warm enough. It's so old and worn out it has holes in it", he whines, making you giggle. The first happy sound to come out of you in at least 12 hours.

He takes off his own cardigan, a cream colored woolen and extremely soft one, and basically forces you to put it on as you sit up in order to drink your tea: "thank you",you mumble, enjoying the sweetness of your drink and the comfort of his cardigan embracing your upper body, "of course, you already got soaked in rain I can't have you catching a cold like that", he pouts, and you shake your head softly, putting your mug on the nightstand for now.

Breathing deeply, a lot more regularly now, you speak softly, pouring out every bit if emotion into what you say, "no, I mean thank you. For everything. You really know how to take care of me. In every single way. I never felt as comforted and well looked after before I met you", you confess, your voice a little shaky for you never expressed this kind of gratitude to him, not this explicitly anyway.

Han smiles at you warmly and strokes your cheek, his thumb rubbing softly on your chin, "I wasn't just saying things earlier, I wasn't just trying to calm you down. I mean it. I will always be here for you", his eyes go shiny and full and he smiles so sweetly you start to think he might just get teary any second now, and you might too, "... I'll always care for you, not matter what... you are my heart, you know?".

You feel your insides melting away and in a second your lips are on his and the way you kiss oh the way you two kiss it's like you're both trying to convey just as much love and care as your own words do.

Something in your chest tugs at you as you pull him closer, the more his chest presses against yours the more it quiets down, the more he holds you to him the more that ache shrivels. You lay down on your back, pulling him on top of you, your reflexes instantly kicking in as your legs wrap up around him instinctively, by muscle memory.

And even though there's necessarily not that much urgency or lust in the way you two are still kissing and tangling your limbs together, you do find yourself panting a little when Han pulls away ever so slightly, "are you okay?", he asks quietly, his elbows resting on each side of your head, eyes travelling down to the hand pressing on your chest, directly on your heart that beats so fast and aches the minute he's not sticking to you, "please hold me, please just hold me", you plead softly, and he happily abides, his whole body settling nicely on top of yours like a warm, weighted blanket.

Comfort. You're engulfed in his arms and his scent and the familiar, pleasant weight of his warm body on top of yours. And the ache stops. It immediately stops. All your muscles go putty like, your senses alight in warmth and softness, your mind shuts down, your whole body finally fully relaxing into bliss.

[tim-shii]

i remember it all too well.

featuring: bachira meguru, itoshi rin, mikage reo

" you almost ran the red 'cause you were looking over at me. "

bachira meguru was an eccentric lover. he likes to have fun and takes you on dates you’d never even expect. one time, during your second date, he took you out to go bungee jumping. you were frozen on the platform for 30 minutes while he was down there, cheering you on with a stupid smile on his face and his phone recording you.

right now, you guys are on the way home after a day at a cat cafe. they were really cute but their fur all over you was not cute at all. you look out the window, admiring the view as the car sped through the road. you hold back a laugh as you pass by a squirrel falling down a tree with its acorn stuck in the branch. you turn to tell bachira when you notice he’s already looking at you.

“eyes on the road!”

“i got my eye on you.” and to push it further, he points two fingers in your direction. sighing lighty, you shove his face to turn to the road. “you can eye me later if we don’t die.”

bachira whips his head to look at you accusingly. “excuse me?! my driving skills are maxed out, you know. and besides, who’s the one with the license between us, huh? that’s right. me. bachira megu–” “yeah, yeah. shut up.” you try to shush him however that seemed to only seethe him more. more screams of fury and annoyance comes from bachira. you were only seconds away from tuning him out when you saw the traffic light glow red. immediately, you urged bachira to step on the brakes. with the panic in your voice, he abides at once.

now at a stop sign, deep breaths coming from the two of you fill the vehicle. giggles and laughter following after. “oh my god, stop laughing, meguru.” he halts his laughter. playfully gesturing a zipper over his lips yet the obvious grin on his face gives it away.

“can we both agree to always keep an eye on the road now?”

“yes, ma’am… got my other eye on you tho.”

“bachira.”

" you told me 'bout your past, thinking your future was me. "

getting into a relationship wasn’t in itoshi rin’s bucket list. or any list really. never did he think that he’ll be here at 3am in the morning, on his bed, with you, and he’s telling you all about him. from the very first time he held a soccer ball to the day sae left for spain. he confided in you, hiding no side of his self and showing you all and even letting you see through him completely.

“so, this is it?” the air was cold. breaking up on a december night? it almost makes him laugh. he’d fight for it but.. what was the point? this is the ending of a love story. your love story. if he tries to change the ending, who knows what could happen next? you stay with him out of pity? or you get tired and all goes in a circle once more. he stays silent. not uttering one word and maybe that set you off because you dragged a hand down your face. he observes you for the first time in weeks. you look really tired and if letting this end would make you happy then so be it.

he walks past you and that leaves you baffled. so he’s just leaving, you think in your head. chest aching and hands itching to reach out, but you don’t. because if he’s walking away without a word, what are the chances he’ll hear you out?

“oh god, i never thought it could end up like this.” rin hears you whisper to yourself as he grabs his coat and makes his way to the door. he bites on his lips, urging the tears brimming his eyes to not fall. not now. as he strolls through the park, he mutters to himself. “neither did i.” but you weren’t there to hear him. only the moon knows.

" we're dancing 'round the kitchen in the refrigerator light. "

loving mikage reo was unexpected and something you’re grateful for. he’s the best boyfriend one could ever ask for. he fell in love with you at first sight when you took his coffee order at the cafe down the block. the continues to visit the coffee shop with a bouquet of flowers dedicated for you everyday until you give him your number.

cravings at midnight are common. you had them a lot so sneaking out of reo’s arms became something you’re skilled at. tiptoeing towards the fridge, you rummage through every shelf to find something to eat. a yelp escapes you as you felt cold hands slid under your shirt. reo’s laughter breaks your shock, turning to hit him in the chest. that just seems to make him laugh more.

“hi, sweetheart. what are you doing?” he smiles like he did nothing wrong. you scowl at him before turning to rummage through the fridge once again. “i’m hungry. i wanna eat.”

“oh? should we just order then?” reo asks you, pulling out his phone and opening a delivery app. he was about to click on an item until your hand blocks his phone while you stare him down with a glare. “reo, your fridge is full to the brim. baa-ya even had to push things in the pantry ‘cause there’s no more space!”

“come on, use your inside voice inside the house.” like the smooth man he is, he cuddles you in his arms, swaying the both of you side by side. only to stop when you pinch his side. “ow! what was that for?"

“don’t dance with me when the fridge door is open!”

“but it’s romantic!”

“an overpriced electricity bill isn’t!”

“you’re not even the one paying the bills–ow!”

likes and reblogs are appreciated! masterlist

[winchesterwild78]

A Little Bit Stronger pt 2

Characters: Dean Winchester x Reader

Warnings: mentions of past hurt, fluff, mentions of sexual contact, nothing too explicit, surprise twist.

A/N: I was stuck in traffic on my way home today and my playlist started playing the song “A Little Bit Stronger” by Sara Evans, and it got me thinking about a story where the reader had dated Dean for years, they broke up and she’s dealing with the loss of their relationship. She’s learning how to move on, and she’s slowly getting better. Then out of nowhere, the green eyed hunter pops back into her life. Mention of Supernatural characters, but doesn’t follow the timeline. 

I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to post another chapter, you know life and all. Please enjoy

All work is my own, I don’t give permission for it to be taken or posted anywhere else. Feel free to reblog. 

Minors DNI 18+

💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

When Dean was sure you were asleep, he placed a soft kiss on your head, “I love you, Y/N. I’m so sorry.” 

The sunlight peeked through the curtains and painted a soft light in the room. Dean’s arms were still wrapped around you, holding you, protecting you. As your eyes opened you smiled softly.

No matter how many years had passed you still loved Dean. He was the love of your life, your safe place, your home. Being in his arms felt right.

You tried to wiggle out of his arms without waking him up, but he stirred awake. “Where are you going, sweetheart?” His voice gruff with sleep. “I need to go to the bathroom. I’m sorry I woke you.” His arms tightened around you and he placed a kiss on your head, “hurry back, baby.” 

His arms loosened and you crawled out of bed with a smirk. When you got back in bed you snuggled back to his side. Looking up, Dean’s green eyes opened and they were soft and full of love and regret. You blushed a little and smiled. Dean placed a soft kiss on your forehead. 

You wanted him to kiss your lips, but you knew he wouldn’t without you initiating it. 

Pushing all the hurt and anger from the past few years away you tilted your head up, looking in his eyes and closed the distance between your lips. You placed a soft, tentative kiss on his plump lips. As you pulled back your eyes locked on each other. Dean closed the distance between you again and this time the kiss was full of so much emotion, need and love. 

You melted in his arms and on his lips. That one kiss spoke louder than any words either of you could say. You still loved Dean, and he still loved you. The need for air became too overwhelming, so you two finally pulled apart, panting and catching your breath. 

You looked into Dean’s eyes as they filled with tears. As his tears fell your breath caught in your throat, “Dean, baby what’s wrong?” You asked as you wiped away the tears. “I’m just so fucking sorry for what I did to you, to us. We would be married and have a kid if I hadn’t thrown us away. I’ll spend the rest of my life regretting walking away from you. I loved you then and I love you now. I never stopped, baby.” 

Your heart broke at the sight of his pain, and leaped at his confession. You cupped his face, your thumbs brushing the tears away, “Dean, I forgive you. I love you. You have to forgive yourself. It doesn’t matter what happened before, all that matters is what happens now. If you want to be with me, then stay or take me with you. If you don’t or you aren’t sure, then you can leave and not feel guilty about it, but you have to make the decision.”

Dean sat up and pulled you onto his lap, cupping your face in his hands, “I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart.” You leaned forward and kissed him deeply, when you pulled away you whispered, “good.” 

“Sweetheart, I have to show you something.” “What is it, Dean?” He kissed your lips and lifted you off of him so he could get up. He walked into the living room and grabbed his jacket, returning to the room. 

“You want to show me your leather jacket?” You smirked. Dean chuckled, “Well, not exactly. I want to show you something I’ve had with me for over 3 years.” Dean pulled out a worn velvet box. His eyes sparkled when he looked at you. You softly gasped as tears pricked your eyes. 

“Dean, is that what I think it is?” He nodded as he stepped closer, “The night you took it off, my soul was crushed. I realized I screwed up, but there was no turning back. I put it in the box and carried it with me every day. I would occasionally pull it out to remind myself of the love I let slip through my fingers, of the love I gave up out of fear. I prayed one day I would be worthy enough to put it back where it belongs, on your finger. I’m not expecting you to wear it right away, but I want you to know I still have it, and one day I hope you will consider being my fiance, and eventually my wife. I love you, Y/N.” 

Tears were streaming down your face. You could tell by how worn the box was that he was telling you the truth. You couldn’t speak, your words stuck in your throat as the tears continued to fall. So, you did the only thing you could think of, you jumped off the bed and into his arms, kissing him. 

“Dean, please ask me again.” Dean looked confused, “Ask you what?” You looked and nodded down at the ring. Dean’s eyes went wide, “Are you sure?” You smiled and nodded. Dean took a shaky breath and dropped to his knee, “Y/N, I know I don’t deserve you, I don’t deserve the love and forgiveness you give me, but I promise you I’m going to spend the rest of my life, every single breath trying to be the man that you deserve. I want to go to bed every night with you in my arms, wake up every morning and see your beautiful face beside me. I want to be the father of your children. You are everything to me, and you will always be my one and only. I love you with every fiber of my being. Y/N, will you marry me?” 

You leaped in his arms and began peppering him with kisses while saying yes. Dean laughed as he kissed you back. He slid the ring on your finger and sighed. “It’s finally back where it belongs.” You looked at your finger and then back at Dean, “Yes it is, and yes you are.” 

“Dean, did you really keep this in your pocket the whole time we’ve been apart?” Dean looked at you and his eyes filled with love, “Every second we were apart, that ring was in my pocket. I would carefully take it out at night and put it inside my bedside table, and every morning I put it back in my pocket. There wasn’t a second that went by that I didn't regret leaving you.”

Your breath hitched in your chest. Tears pricked your eyes, “Oh Dean. I love you so much.” “I love you too, Y/N.” 

Later in the day Dean called Sam and Eileen. “Well it’s about damn time, Dean. Glad you finally came to your senses.” Sam chuckled. “Y/N, I can’t wait for you to finally be my sister.” Sam said over speaker phone. “Me either, Sammy.” You laughed. 

After Sam and Dean said their goodbyes, you and Dean sat talking about the past three years. You told him about your job, how you’d kept in touch with Sam and Eileen, and how sorry you were to hear about his father. “I went to his funeral, Dean. I saw you and wanted to run to you and comfort you. Seeing Lisa on your arm, offering comfort, I knew it was no longer my place. I sat in the back, not wanting to be seen, but I saw you and heard you when you spoke. I cried with you and for you and Sam. When you talked about your dad and how you were glad he was finally at peace and with your mom my heart clenched for you. I know we didn’t see eye to eye, but I was sorry to hear he died.” 

Dean sat with tears in his eyes. He had no idea you had gone to the funeral, you hadn’t even told Sam you went. “Baby, I can’t believe you were there. Even though I didn’t know you were there, thank you. You have no idea what that means to me.” He cupped your face and placed a kiss on your lips. 

“Dean, I love you, and nothing was going to keep me from supporting you and being there. Even if it was in the shadows, I had to be there for you. I told you, I’ve loved you this whole time. I do regret not coming up to you and offering you my condolences, but I didn’t want to complicate things or cause problems.” “Oh believe me, if you had I would have left with you.”

Dean kept looking at you in bewilderment. “Baby, I hate that I've lost three years with you. That’s three years we could have been married and had at least one kid. I still want children with you, if you still do.” You smiled at him, taking his hand in yours, “Yes, Dean, I still want children with you, at least 2.” You smirked.

“Really?” You stepped up, placed your hands on his chest, “Yes, really. I can’t wait, maybe we should practice a little?” You winked at him and sauntered towards the bedroom. Dean stood frozen in place, his brain not comprehending what you said yet. You looked over at Dean with a soft smile and mischievous eyes, “Do I need to spell it out for you Winchester?” 

Dean’s brain finally caught up and he grinned, “Oh no ma’am.” He took large strides towards you and you giggled as you took off towards the bedroom.” Dean catches up to you, pulling you into his strong arms and placing a soft kiss on your lips. 

*time jump 5 months*

“Dean, I need to get to work.” You giggled as Dean held on to you, preventing you from getting out of bed. “Ah come on, sweetheart, just 5, maybe 10 more minutes?” You relented and slipped back into his arms. “You’re going to make me late….again.” You smiled as you kissed his lips. “Am I hearing complaints?” He smirked as he kissed down your neck. 

“Mmm, no…but…I…” Your words got lost in your throat. Dean’s lips trailing down your body made your mind go blank. Dean chuckled, “What’s wrong sweetheart? Can’t seem to find the words?” “Dean, take me.” That’s all he needed, he was pulling off his boxers and lifting up your shirt and pulling it over your head. You’d be late again, but really at this point you didn’t care. All you cared about was being in his arms, feeling his lips and hands on your body. 

After about 45 minutes, you needed a shower, and to call work. You came up with some excuse about your car not starting and how Dean was working on it, and you’d be in as soon as you could. Your boss wasn’t happy and didn’t believe you, because he knew Dean was meticulous with your car and kept it running great, but he grumbled and said he’d see you shortly. 

Dean was chuckling in the living room when he heard you explaining why you were going to be late. Hanging up you cut your eyes at him, “What’s so funny?” “Sweetheart, there’s no way he bought that about your car.” You walked over to him, “Well Mr. Winchester, I can’t very well tell him I couldn’t come in on time because my fiance was trying his best to break his record of how many times he could make me cum in 30 minutes, now could I!?”

Dean roared with laughter, “Now I’d love to hear that.” You rolled your eyes and walked towards the bathroom to shower. “I’m jumping in the shower so I can at least go in for a little bit today.” Dean’s eyes sparkled with mischief. “Oh no you don’t, not this time, Dean. I really need to shower and get to work.” Dean did his best puppy dog eyes at you. You smirked and shook your head no.

He poked his lip out and you giggled, “Fine, but this is the last time and I have to get to work.” He ran towards you and started taking off his clothes. You giggled as you turned on the water and started shedding your clothes. Dean pulled you flush to his body and kissed you. Running his hands in your hair, you could feel your arousal running down your thigh and his pushing into your belly. 

The two of you went two rounds in the shower and you finally cleaned up. Your legs and pussy ached but in the best way. You’d never get tired of being with Dean. The way he knew just how to touch you, to make you feel like you’re the only woman on earth. It was hard for him to say I love you, but he definitely showed it. Not just with the way he took care of your needs in bed, but the way he took care of you, period. 

He was the love of your life, and you were his. Since the two of you got back together, things were better than they had been. He moved in with you, and got a job at a local auto shop. He loved working on cars, and got the chance to work on old cars too. Dean didn’t completely give up hunting, though. He would go and help other hunters if the case was within a few hours drive. 

If Jody or the girls called, both of you would go. Dean always put family first, and they were your family, so if they needed him, you both were there. 

Sam and Eileen had another baby, this time a little girl, and Dean loved being an uncle. You loved watching him with the kids, it made your heart full and you couldn’t help but think about what he would be like with your children. The two of you would go visit as often as you could, you loved being around the kids, Sam and Eileen. 

You were finally ready for work. Grabbing your stuff, you walked over to Dean and kissed him goodbye, “I love you Dean, this morning was incredible.” You placed your hands on his chest. He kissed you again, “Yes it was,baby, I love you too. So damn much.” Dean had the day off, so he was in his black henley and gray sweatpants. You almost stayed home for that outfit alone. He always looked amazing in whatever he wore, but when he wore his “lazy” clothes, as he called them, it just did something to you.

Maybe it was because he had been constantly on the go since he was 4 and barely had time to relax, so when he got a chance it made your heart full. 

You turned and headed towards the door. “Hey sweetheart, be careful and I’ll see you later.” You turned, smiled at Dean and nodded.

Work was busy, which you were glad for. It made the day go by faster. Your boss was pissy you were so late, but he eventually shut up about it. Especially when you turned on the tears, apologizing. You knew crying would always make him leave you alone, and he knew Dean would be pissed if you told him he made you cry. 

Driving home your body vibrated with anticipation and excitement. You weren’t sure why, but you couldn’t shake the feeling something was about to happen. 

As you pulled in the driveway you saw the lights on in the house and Dean’s car sitting in the driveway. You smiled as you got out of the car. You loved coming home to Dean. 

As you stepped on the porch you heard soft music playing and you smiled. Opening the front door you were greeted by the soft glow of candles, music and rose petals on the floor. You looked over at the dining room and saw candles and a set table. The whole house had been cleaned, and you could smell something amazing. 

A smile spread across your face. As you stepped in, sitting your stuff down, you looked up and saw Dean. He was standing in the doorway between the kitchen and dining room with a suit and tie. Your breath hitched and tears filled your eyes. 

“Welcome home, sweetheart.” Dean said softly as he stepped closer to you. You licked your lips, and pulled your bottom lip in, biting it. “Dean, what is all this? You look amazing, this looks amazing.” 

“I just wanted to do something for my girl. You’ve been working so hard, and I wanted you to know how much I love and appreciate you.” He placed a soft kiss on your lips and pulled you into his arms. 

After the two of you shared the delicious dinner Dean made, you two went and sat on the back porch. Dean poured you a glass of wine and he had a glass of whiskey. A pregnant silence fell between the two of you. The only sounds were the sounds of the crickets, and the hoot of an owl in the distance. 

“So sweetheart, I’ve been thinking.” You turned and looked at Dean, “What about, baby?” “About us getting married and having those babies we talked about.” You swallowed hard, “Okay, what about them?” You started to get nervous, was he about to tell you he decided he didn’t want to get married, have kids? Was this why you felt so strange coming home? 

“Well, we’ve been together a while now. I don’t want to wait any longer to make it official. Let’s get married. I don’t care if we elope. I want to get married and start our family.” You took a deep shaky breath, “Really? When?” “Let’s do it this weekend, we can go to Jody’s, Cas or Jack can officiate, and I’m sure between Eileen, Jody and the girls, you can find something to wear. I mean, only if you want to.” You stood up, pulled him up to you and kissed him, “Yes, Dean. A thousand times, yes! Let’s do it. Besides, we only have about 6 ½ months before our lives get turned upside down again.” 

Dean looked confused, “Wait, why? What did I forget? What’s happening in 6 ½ months?” His green eyes are so full of questions. You cupped his face, “Well, in about 6 ½ months you won’t just be my fiance or husband, you’ll be a daddy.” Dean stood frozen in his spot, eyes blinking, trying to process what you were saying.

“Wait, what?” You smiled at him and his confusion, taking his face in your hands, you placed a soft kiss on his lips and looked into his eyes, “Dean, I’m pregnant.” 

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[jerzwriter]

To Love & over Protect - Tobias x Casey HC

It took me three years to tell the story of how my messy kids finally got together. By the time they did, they were so in love with a solid foundation of friendship beneath them. The honeymoon period was intense; however, nothing is perfect, and transitioning from friends to so much more comes with its challenges. So, I decided it was time to finally write those stories, too. The first story was Money, Money and this second was a little jealous. This may be the last one, but never say never!

Book: Open Heart (Book 2 Timeline) Pairing: Tobias Carrick x Casey MacTavish (F!MC) Rating: Teen Words: 1,900 Summary: The chemical attack was over six months ago, and Casey is trying to adjust to her new normal with her new boyfriend at her side. The problem is? He thinks he needs to be there 24/7, and as sweet as it is, Casey needs him to understand, she can still take care of herself.

Tobias x Casey Masterlist Open Heart Masterlist Full Masterlist

Tobias glanced at his phone for the fifth time in as many minutes. Finally, the confirmation arrived, but not the one he wanted to see. The car he had arranged to pick Casey up from work at Edenbrook was stuck in traffic in Charlestown and wouldn’t be there on time. In fact, it was unlikely he’d be there for another hour.

“Fuck,” he muttered, leaning back in his office chair.

He’d ask her to wait, but he knew her too well. She’d tell him she knew how to get home and that she had managed to do so before he came into her life. She could take the T. It was nice out; she could even stand the 40-minute walk. He could just hear her. Tobias, I’ll be fine. And chances are she was right. But he wasn’t wasn’t about to take chances, not with her.

He sent her a quick text. Hey, hon. Getting out of work a little early. Wait for me; I’ll pick you up.

It wasn't exactly a lie, he was leaving early, it just wasn't planned until a second before. He opened his laptop, rescheduled a meeting or two, and ensured his patients had coverage. Then he rushed to the elevator, a full four hours before his shift was scheduled to end. He got off at the garage level, walking to his car at a rapid pace. Edenbrook was only an eleven-minute drive from Mass Kenmore, but with traffic, that could nearly double. He looked at his watch. It was 7:00 PM, and the sun wouldn't set for another ninety minutes. Surely she'd be fine. He knew he was overreacting, but he couldn't help it.

Therapy had gone a long way, but some memories could never be erased, no matter how much he wished they could. He was a doctor; he knew the signs, and he saw them in Casey that dreadful night. Her skin was no longer pale but became an ashen shade of grey. Her extremities took on a tinge of blue, and her breathing became shallow. Disorientation and lethargy had set in; she couldn’t focus on a conversation the last time he walked away from her in the containment room. He wasn’t even sure she knew he was there. That’s when he knew they had hours, not days, to unravel a mystery doctors better than him had never been able to solve, and the healthy fear that was driving him quickly morphed into terror.

The odds were against them, but he walked away from her with a promise in his heart and his heart in his throat. They’d find a cure. He’d find it. He’d see her again; he had to. They weren’t even on speaking terms prior to the attack, and that was no one’s fault but his own. But that didn't stop him from loving her. He may have been too clueless, too foolish, or too scared to admit it before, but there was no way he could deny it now. Tobias Carrick, Boston's most notorious confirmed bachelor loved Dr. Casey MacTavish with all his heart... and she didn’t even know.

The elevator door closed, and he had one minute. One minute to fall apart, to allow his body to tremble and his tears to flow. One minute to let the hopelessness wash over him and to pray to God for a miracle with all his might. But when the door opened, that luxury ended. The miracle was dependent on mere mortals; it depended on him. Never seeing the woman he loved alive again was not an option... her dying without even knowing how he felt was unacceptable. So he went to work.

The story had a happy ending, or as happy as it could be. An antidote was found, Casey survived, and their friendship flourished. In the dark days and months that followed, he was there for her, her rock ensuring she'd get through. It turned out that she loved him, too, and he had no idea just how much joy that would bring.

His Casey. She was his, and he was hers... but this was the real world, and he knew happily ever after didn’t exist, but dragons certainly did. They could appear at any time, be waiting around any corner, and they kept him up at night. He couldn’t shake the anxiety that gripped him. The mere thought of her in danger again filled him with a dread he couldn’t control, casting a shadow over the new life they were trying to lead.

Casey wasn't blind to it. She saw the signs and did all that she could to reassure him. She could handle herself, but Tobias couldn’t let it go. She was no longer to take the T. Boston's subway was too unpredictable, too full of potential danger. He had drivers on call to take her anywhere she needed to go when he couldn’t drive her himself. He even had groceries delivered to her apartment when he wasn't able to join her for errands. While Casey found it sweet and endearing at first, it was starting to wear on her, and she knew it was taking a toll on him, too.

When he arrived at the Edenbrook, his heart warmed as he watched her slide into the passenger seat beside him. She may have been exhausted after a long day, but she was radiant. She flashed that smile that lit up his entire world, and his heart skipped a beat. She was happy, healthy, alive, safe... and now she was here, with him.

“Hi, babe,” she greeted, leaning across the console for a quick kiss. “So, you’re my driver again?”

Tobias forced a smile, knowing what was coming next, but he could take the ribbing, as long as she was safe. He gently brushed stray strands of hair away from her face. God. He loved her.

“Hey, baby. How was your day?”

“Long,” she sighed, running a hand through her hair. “But good. I can’t complain. Though, I think I’ve forgotten what it’s like to get home from work by myself. Might have to retrain myself soon.”

He chuckled half-heartedly and took her hand. She could tease him all she wanted to. At least he knew she was safe. But as they drove to her apartment, it was impossible to ignore how quiet she had become. Something was on her mind, and he feared he knew precisely what it was.

They found a parking spot, and she invited him in. Kicking her shoes off at the door, she headed directly to her room, collapsing onto the bed with a groan. Tobias lay down beside her, gently caressing her arm. He couldn’t have been happier to be by her side, but his heart was still racing, and he knew they needed to talk.

“Casey,” he said softly. She turned to him, her eyes warm and patient. “I know I’ve been… a bit much lately.”

She raised an eyebrow, lips curving into a small smile. “A bit?”

“Okay, maybe more than a bit,” he admitted.

“Considering the fact that you’re not supposed to be at work for another three hours and you offered to accompany me to the bathroom, I’d say it’s more than a bit.”

“I just… I can’t help it, baby. I know you’re more than capable of taking care of yourself, but...”

“But?” She said, reaching to touch his cheek.

“I can’t stand the thought of anything bad happening to you, Casey. Not after everything… I need to protect you. I need to keep you safe. Having you hurt or, God forbid, losing you... it's not an option."

She reached for his hand. “I know, Tobias. I know you're doing all this because you care about me, and I love you for it. But you have to understand—this is no way to live. For either of us.”

“I’m afraid, Casey,” he said, his voice trembling with a vulnerability he rarely allowed himself to show. “I’m terrified that one day something will happen, and I won’t be able to save you.”

Tears welled up in Casey’s eyes as she leaned in closer, cupping his face in her hand. “You already saved me, hon. You saved my life and spent the months following showing me how to live again. I’m here because of you in more ways than one. But now, I need you to help me return to the real world, and I can’t do that if you’re constantly trying to protect me from it.”

He looked into her eyes, the weight of her words seeping in. She was right, of course. He’d been so focused on keeping her safe that he hadn’t realized he was suffocating both of them in the process. This was no way for them to live.

“You’re right,” he whispered. “I’m sorry. I wanted to help bring you back to life, not prevent you from living it.”

“Don’t you dare apologize for loving me and caring about me,” she replied. “But promise me you’ll work on this, OK? Talk to your therapist if you have to. You don’t have to do this alone.”

Tobias nodded, pulling her into his arms and burying his face in her hair. “I promise. I’ll do better. I just… I love you so much, Casey. I don’t want to lose you.”

“You won’t,” she whispered, pressing a kiss to his temple.

“You can’t guarantee that,” he sighed, his head filling with visions of that night against his will.

“Hey,” she said, forcing him to look her in the eye. “No day is promised to any of us, T, but there is only so much we can control. You know I’ll take care of myself, and I know you’ll do your part, too. But the rest... if we spend all our time worrying about all the things that can go wrong, we’ll never enjoy the time that we have. I don’t blame you, baby. We both went through a terrible ordeal, and it will take time to heal. But I have faith in you. I have faith in us."

He looked at her, his face twisted with all the emotions he was feeling at that moment, but the most prominent of them all was love.

“I love you, baby. I don’t have a ton of experience with this relationship stuff, and, well, ours got off to an eventful start....”

“It sure did,” she smiled. “And it’s not easy, but it will only make us stronger.”

Tobias's arms encircled her, and he pulled her as close as she could; Casey snuggled closer to him, relishing his closeness, his warmth.

“You mind if I stay over here tonight, kid?”

“Why,” she giggled. “Do you want to be with me, or are you just protecting me?”

“Oh,” he growled, rolling on top of her, his lips meeting hers in a passionate kiss. “I want to be with you all right. But two things can be true. I’m happy to protect you while I’m here... you can protect me, too, if that makes you feel better.”

“It does. I love you,” she smiled, giving him another tender kiss, then pulled back with an impish twinkle in her eye. Now, with all of this talk of protection... please tell me you have some on you because, if you’re staying, I have some fun activities in mind."

"You may not know this," he smiled, reaching into his pant pocket. "But I was a Boy Scout. I'm always prepared."

"And that's one of the things I love about you," she laughed, gripping his hands as they toyed with the hem of her shirt. But seriously, baby, promise you'll talk to your therapist. I want us both to heal from this. We have a beautiful life ahead."

He leaned in to kiss her forehead. "We sure do, and I'm not going to let anything, even my fear, get in our way."

@choicesficwriterscreations @openheartfanfics

Tagging others separately.

[loverontheleft]

Yes (revised)

Original request: ok, this request is very specific because I fantasize about it a lot. you and b are roommates (nonfamous AU) and ur in the shower, rubbing one out, having a grand ol’ time and b gets home and BARRELS into the bathroom cuz he has to pEE like nOW and obvs catches on to what ur up to and offers a hand. or a mouth. or a dick. whatevs.

AU!Brendon x reader.

Word count: 2.7k➡️6.7k

Warnings: language, dirty talk, oral, brief thigh-riding because it’s me, shower sex, talk of spanking, general feelings and shit.

-||-

The shower is the perfect temperature; the ceramic tiles are no longer cold to the touch and you’re leaning against the wall with your handheld shower-head pulsing on a low pressure between your legs. “Oh fuck,” you sigh, rolling your hips against the stream. You’re lost in the sensation, letting yourself imagine Brendon’s soft, eager tongue working at your clit, when the floor outside your bathroom door creaks. Before you can do anything, the door slams open; Brendon’s flying into your bathroom, and you’re shrieking.

“Shit! What the fuck?!”

Brendon babbles his apologies. “Got stuck in crazy traffic had to pee barely made it inside couldn’t make it to my bathroom,” he says in one breath, sighing in relief. You’re trying to catch your breath; the showerhead is still between your legs and when you move it, it hits at just the right angle. You whimper a little, before clapping a hand over your mouth in horror.

“Y/n?” You can practically hear Brendon’s head cock to the side. “Are you…okay?”

“Uh huh,” you manage in a strained voice, silently willing him to leave.

“Okay…you just sounded…Wait a minute—are you getting off in there?”

There’s a long pause, and you know that says more than enough. You choose honesty. “I was trying to,” you say through gritted teeth, and he makes a thoughtful sound. “Until my roommate came bursting in and threw off my—”

“Groove?” Brendon suggests, and you want to throttle him. “My bad. But if you want to start again, I could hel—”

“No,” you cut him off sharply, replacing the shower head in its clip and slamming the water off.

“Just saying, I apparently owe you, and I’ve helped bef—”

“Shut up,” you tell him, wrapping yourself in a towel and flinging the curtain back. “We said we wouldn’t talk about that again.” His gaze moves slowly over your body wrapped in the towel, and he looks up at you with a glint in his eyes. “Seriously, Brendon. That was a one-time thing; we were both incredibly drunk and horny, and we didn’t even—you just—we just—I just—” you falter, fumbling for the words. You’re equally aroused at the memory and frustrated that he’s being so casual about it. All these months later and you still aren’t sure what his feelings are, but his joking now makes you think it wasn’t that serious for him—which hurts. But the way he’s looking at you now—

“Yeah,” Brendon murmurs, cutting off your thoughts and still eying you. “I just fingered you while we just made out and you just gave me one of the best han—”

“Shut up!” You press your hands to your face. “You promised!”

Brendon holds up both hands innocently as he heads for the door. Stepping through, he looks back at you. “Well, the offer stands. You know where to find me if you decide you need me, darlin.”

You freeze at the name and turn to stare at him. He arches an eyebrow and bites his lip suggestively; you storm past him into your room across the hall.

“Oh, don’t be angry, Y/n. I just want to help!” He calls through your door, which you’ve just slammed shut. “I’m sorry, darlin!”

-||-

“Fuck—fuck—fuck—no!” You moan, rolling onto your stomach, fingers rubbing at your clit furiously. “Why—fuck!” You’re almost in tears, and you bury your face in your pillow, moaning in desperation. You need to come. “Well, the offer stands. You know where to find me if you decide you need me, darlin.” His voice echoes in your head, and you freeze, remembering that night. You can feel your heart rate spiking; you try to press the memories back into their small box.

-//- 6 months earlier -\\-

It’s been a hell of a week for both of you at your respective jobs, and Brendon has declared it Drunk Movie Night as a coping mechanism. He’s in the kitchen, and you’re sprawled on the couch waiting for him to come back with the first round of drinks. He’s promised something incredible and delicious, and you’re looking forward to it.

You can hear his footsteps; you look up. He’s got two large glasses in his hand, filled with clear liquid. “What is that?”

“No spoilers,” Brendon chides playfully, passing you a glass. He takes a long sip, and you do the same. You choke, immediately coughing. “It’s straight tequila,” he admits, making you laugh.

“You aren’t fucking around on this drunk movie night thing, I see.” Better prepared now, you take a small sip from your glass. Brendon nods and settles on the couch at the opposite end. Glass in one hand, remote in the other, you turn on the tv. When you open Hulu, prepared to scroll, Brendon flings a hand at you and then points at the screen.

“Black Swan,” he says. You blink at him. Brendon can see your confusion, and he clarifies. “Black Swan. The Natalie Portman ballet movie. Wait. You’ve never seen it?”

You shake your head, commenting that he doesn’t seem like the type for a ballet film, and Brendon shrugs. “It’s deeply fucked up. You’d like it.”

“…thanks, I think?”

He grins, lounging back against the couch cushions. You click Play.

-||-

You’re both done with your first tumblers of tequila and halfway through a refill. You’ve done the math; the two of you are drinking from sixteen-ounce glasses, so being halfway through a second glass means you’re at the equivalent of your sixth margarita, sans any mixer. But you don’t need math to know you’re both more than a little drunk when Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis lunge at each other in the bedroom. You toss a pillow in Brendon’s direction; it ricochets off his foot and falls to the ground.

“You pervert. This is why you wanted to watch Black Swan?”

“It’s a definite factor,” Brendon murmurs, his eyes on the screen. You glance back at the tv, and your breath catches. You’re not enjoying this the way Brendon is; instead, you are painfully aware of how long it’s been since someone pushed you onto a bed like that. You’ve been so caught up in work, but you’ve also been trying to process your feelings for Brendon. Living together has been mostly great, though having him in such close proximity has been hell on your emotions. You’d honestly expected living together to end your romantic interest, because you’d see all of his bad habits and annoying tendencies—but it hasn’t. If anything, it has only solidified your feelings.

“I should‘ve known you didn’t care about ballet,” you grumble, and Brendon laughs, draining his glass. As he swallows, his eyes leave the film, and he looks at you. You’re aware of the heat in his gaze; your breathing gets even shallower. He’s never seemed interested in you, but the look in his eyes now makes you wonder if you’ve been missing signs from him the way he’s been missing them from you.

You cave. “What?”

Brendon shrugs. “We’ve lived together for fifteen months, and you haven’t had anyone over.”

Your mind catches on the ‘fifteen months’ detail; you can’t help but think that he’s been keeping track. Why not just say ‘a year’ or ‘more than a year’? He clears his throat, and you realize he’s waiting for something. “Oh, sorry. Was that a question?”

“I guess my question is, don’t you miss it?” He gestures at the screen, where Natalie Portman is writhing on her bed. You desperately do, and you desperately want him. You can’t tell him that though; you need to deflect.

“I don’t miss Mila Kunis eating me out, no,” you manage, and Brendon snorts, shaking his head. “Why are we talking about this?”

“Because you need to get laid.”

“…Do I?”

You wonder if he can feel the tension and desire radiating from you. He nods, turning to face you more fully, and you think your heart is going to explode. His face is flushed, his hand is inching across the space between you, and his eyes are moving between yours and your lips. You can’t breathe.

“Yeah. You do.”

You can feel your pulse in your ears. Before you can respond, Brendon’s sliding across the couch and kissing you deeply. You gasp when his tongue finds yours, and he pulls back. “Shit, I’m so sorr—”

But you cut him off, grabbing him by the back of the head and crushing his mouth back over yours. He groans into your mouth, and you move together as he guides you into his lap so you can straddle him. The kiss is desperate and urgent; you’re tugging at his hair, he’s clutching you closer, and your hands are roaming over each other. He’s hard, and you’re keenly aware of how wet you are. You moan and scratch at his chest, begging for more. Instead of giving you more though, Brendon pulls back and looks at you closely.

“Hang on a sec. Are you drunk?” He asks in a rough voice, hands framing your face and thumbs stroking your cheekbones as he peers into your eyes. You know he knows how much you’ve had. He’s been pouring the tequila all night. You know there’s no point in lying. You nod, and you know the answer to the question you’re about to ask.

“Are you?”

“Yeah,” Brendon admits, breathing hard. “Should we—you can’t consent if you’re—I don’t want to push—”

“Let’s just…not have sex then,” you suggest, still trying to convince yourself that it’s the right choice, the responsible choice, even as the words leave your mouth. You really want to have sex with him.

“Let’s just not have sex,” Brendon agrees, staring at you longingly. “But…if it’s okay with you—can we keep—” and he gestures between the two of you.

“Please,” you moan, kissing him again. You can feel how hard he is, can feel his erection pressing into you. You bear down against him; you think you could probably come even if all you two do for the rest of the night is make out. If he’ll let you grind on him while he kisses you like this, you know you’ll come.

-||-

You’re not sure how long you’ve been kissing when you find your hand wandering down and your fingers grazing his cock. He curses under his breath, staring at you hungrily.

“Is this okay? Me touching you?” Your voice trembles, and Brendon nods, leaning back. You can’t take your eyes off of his erection, can’t stop tracing the length of him; meanwhile, Brendon is groaning your name and pressing his hips up to feel more of your hand. Hearing him say your name like that makes you brave enough to ask. “Is this from me, or from Natalie and Mila?” You’ve chosen a teasing tone, but you’re desperate to know.

His own hands have made it down to your hips, and you can feel his fingertips tease the waistband of your leggings. “Fuck, it’s all you. It’s all for you. Can I touch you?” When you nod, he works a hand down into your leggings, murmuring how he can feel how wet you are through your underwear. “Is this okay?” He’s caressing you through your panties, pressing and rubbing lightly in a way that makes you regret suggesting abstinence.

“So okay,” you murmur, curling your hand around him through his sweatpants. “Is this?”

“Yeah,” Brendon says quickly. His face is slightly flushed; his hair is a mess, and he can’t take his eyes off of you. You stroke him intently, wishing you could really feel the hot weight of his cock in your hand.

“Even though we’re both drunk?” You don’t want to stop. You just don’t want him doubting anything or stressing.

“I think as long as we don’t actually have like—sex. Hands are fine.” You can see in his eyes that he desperately wants you too, and you love him for showing restraint. You also know that you can’t tell him you love him. Not now, anyway. Not like this. He interrupts your thoughts. “Hands are good. Are fingers good too?”

It takes you a moment to process what he means. When it clicks, when you register his two fingers between your thighs and the way they’ve spread to tease the edge of your underwear, you make yourself a little dizzy and nauseous from how fast you nod.

And then he’s got two fingers inside you, and everything aligns for you in total clarity. It just feels right: Brendon holding you, touching you like this. His fingers are, and you tell him this breathlessly, better than good—they’re absolutely perfect. His thumb rolls against your clit; your head falls backward, and you wonder if you should be embarrassed by how quickly he’s going to make you come.

“Hands aren’t sex, right?” You ask the question to try to temper your lust. You know your personal answer, but you need to make sure you’re on the same page. Brendon shakes his head.

“Hands and fingers are foreplay,” he murmurs against your neck.

“Right. Yes. Good. When does foreplay become sex?”

“Mouths,” Brendon says reluctantly. You whine, even though you expected that. You’ve been thinking about his tongue replacing his fingers, and if his tone is any indication, he has too.

“Mouths,” you agree, shifting to get his fingers deeper. “Can I—” and you tug at his sweatpants. “I want to touch you more. If you’d like that.”

“I really fucking would,” Brendon tells you, lifting his hips a little and leaning against the cushions to make moving his sweatpants and underwear down easier. You’ve shifted back in his lap, his fingers are still in you but at a different angle now, and you can’t stop staring at his cock. You’ve had your hand all over him, but feeling him through his sweatpants and seeing all of him, fully hard and curving back so the tip presses to his stomach, is different. Seeing the way beads of pre-cum roll from the head down his shaft makes you wish mouths didn’t count as sex. But you know Brendon is right. Better to linger here with hands and fingers.

Still, you need to hear it again. “Mouths are definitely sex, right?” You rub your thumb lightly over the tip of his cock, spreading the slick pre-cum and hoping he’s imagining your tongue doing the same thing. You’re definitely imagining his tongue replacing his thumb on your clit.

“Mouths are sex,” Brendon repeats, his eyes closed and head tipped back. “Wish they weren’t. Wish I could—wish you could—god, just your hand though…”

“Would normally just spit in my hand,” you tell him, and he opens his eyes to look at you. “But I should probably use something else to keep me from eventually…” you fumble for the words, but you can see he knows what you mean. If you just used spit to slick up his cock, you’d eventually end up sucking him off. You need to use something that’ll keep you from blowing him. “Lotion,” you decide finally, making him laugh.

“Gonna make me feel like a teenager again,” he murmurs. “Except your hand on my cock, jerking me off while we make out will be much better than anything I experienced as a teenager. Plus,” he adds, “I’ve got my fingers in your wet pussy.”

“Which is hopefully an upgrade from your masturbation sessions,” you tease, squirting some of the hand lotion you keep in a basket on your end table into your palm. You press closer to him again, whimpering happily as his fingers slide in deeper.

“Definitely an upgrade,” he assures you, bringing you in for a long kiss. You wrap your hand around him, already stroking eagerly. “Goddamn,” Brendon murmurs into your mouth. “Darlin, your hand feels so fucking good.”

“Love that,” you moan, working your fist over him. “Love you calling me that.”

“Love calling you that too.” His fingers curl inside you, seeking your G-spot, and you squeal, rocking against his hand. “You like that?”

“So good; you can go harder though,” you pant, squeezing his cock as you stroke downward. “Is this how you like it? Show me how you like your cock played with.”

“You’re so damn hot,” he groans. “Yeah, do it just like that—squeeze when you get to the base, twist on the way up, fuck yes…yes, god, you’re incredible. Don’t stop.”

“Won’t stop,” you assure him, moving against his fingers. “If you don’t. Shit, I’m close. The way you press right—yeah, like that, yes! And your thumb, fuck that’s—that’s gonna make me—oh god, Brendon, yes!”

“Want you to come all over my hand,” Brendon says, curling his fingers more insistently and picking up his pace. “Want to feel you let go; come hard, darlin.”

“Want to come together,” you counter, kissing up his neck and nipping at his earlobe. “Can we come together?”

“Fuck yeah; if you keep tightening your grip like that and then rubbing the tip with your— shit, is that your pinky pressing on, teasing my balls? Oh fuck, that’s great…”

“Guitar Hero was good for something—stretching my pinky,” you laugh breathlessly. Brendon chokes on his laughter, staring at you in wonder. “What?” You’re a little self-conscious, but you also love his eyes on you.

“You’re incredible,” he says simply. “Just incredible. God, I’m gonna come if you keep—darlin, need you to whisper in my ear that you want me to come.” He’s tense under you, his fingers are working steadily, and you’re right on the edge.

“Bren, I want you to come for me.” Your lips are right under his ear. “Need you to come for me so I can come on your fingers. God, I’m holding back, holding on; want you to—”

Brendon cuts you off with a desperate groan, kissing you fiercely and rocking his hips up into your grasp. “Coming,” he manages, flexing his fingers in you. “Come for me, darlin.”

You let the tension leave your body, and your orgasm rocks through you. You can feel him spilling over your hand, and you know from how he’s gasping your name that it feels good for him. Meanwhile, you’re trembling on his fingers, clutching his head to keep his mouth against yours. It’s hot waves of pleasure coursing over your whole body, and you can barely breathe from how good it feels to come like this with two of his fingers still curling and thrusting while his thumb keeps moving on your clit.

“Fuck,” Brendon groans, and you nod, going limp against him. He holds you close and slips his hand from your leggings.

“Fuck,” you agree, resting your forehead on his shoulder. You’re both trying to catch your breath when you ask, “was that a mistake?” You freeze. You didn’t mean to ask that.

Brendon tenses under you. “Do you think it was a mistake?” His voice is hesitant; you can’t read his tone otherwise.

“I don’t know.”

You do know. You know exactly how you feel. You don’t think it was a mistake; you love him, and you’re so content curled into him now. But if Brendon isn’t sure, if Brendon’s regretting it, then you’re not about to volunteer any of that.

“Okay…should we talk—”

You know where this is going. You have no interest in hearing him tell you how much you mean to him as a friend and how he doesn’t want to lose you or ruin your living situation.

You cut him off. “We don’t have to talk about it.” You can hear the shift in your own voice now. You’re getting guarded. You’ve never liked being vulnerable, and this feels pretty vulnerable.

“But maybe we should—”

“I’m gonna head to bed. We don’t have to talk about it,” you manage, crawling out of his lap. Your main goal is to get to your room before you burst into tears.

-//- the present -\\-

You open your eyes, groaning. You couldn’t stifle the memories, and you can’t stifle the feelings. Worse, you’re remembering how good his fingers felt. “No,” you say out loud. “No. No.”

His shower across the apartment turns on, and you freeze. “You know where to find me if you decide you need me, darlin.”

“Fuck.” You roll onto your back again and close your eyes, wondering if he’s touching himself while thinking of you. You remember how he moaned your name and bucked into your fist as his tongue teased yours and his fingers worked inside you. You can still feel his fingers curling when he made you come, and you can remember how his cock throbbed in your grasp. Fuck.

You can picture him in the shower, stroking his cock and panting your name. Your fingers move faster, and you’re arching your back, gasping and moaning; you’re almost there when — “You know where to find me if you decide you need me, darlin.”

“Son of a bitch.” There’s a shift internally; you feel like you’ve come to some conclusion. His voice in your head is breaking your concentration, so clearly you need to just go to the source.

You throw yourself out of bed and slip into a t-shirt and shorts, well aware of the slickness on your inner thighs. You’re not sure what your plan is as you pad across your apartment and toward his bathroom door quietly; still, you’re sure this is what you need. The water is running, but you can hear him through the door.

“Fuck,” he grunts, followed by a low groan of your name. You’re desperate for more, and you know it’s a bad idea to twist the doorknob and slip silently into his bathroom. You do it anyway. The room is foggy, and you lean against the wall opposite the shower.

You’re telling yourself you aren’t going to do anything—you’re just going to listen for a bit, then sneak back to your room and get yourself off—when you hear his fist start to slide over himself. Is he using shampoo, conditioner, or lube? The question pops into your head and you blush, biting on your knuckles. And what is he imagining? That night, your hand on him, stroking him urgently while he rubbed your clit? Or—is he thinking about your mouth? You feel a rush of want, and it makes you dizzy. You’re grateful for your knuckles in your mouth because they muffle your whimper.

“Y/n?”

Or you thought they did. You freeze.

“Y/n,” he sighs, his hand audibly picking up speed. You relax. He was just imagining things. “Darlin, your mouth,” he groans, and that’s one question answered. Your stomach tightens. “Honey, you’re gonna make me come if you keep sucking my cock like this; that’s it, fuck, please—oh shit yeah, suck just like—I’m gonna—god, I’m gonna eat your pussy so good, just you fucking wait.”

You can feel yourself getting wetter, and you try to slip your hand inside your shorts without making too much noise. A voice in your head tells you not to be greedy, to just keep this moment in your mind while you go back to your room, but you can’t walk away. You want to get yourself off by listening to him touch himself to the idea of a blowjob from you or going down on you.

“Y/n, oh God, you’re fingering yourself while you blow me? So hot. That’s it, darlin; ride your fingers, think about taking my cock. Fuck, you look so damn sexy, three fingers deep in your cunt. Think about my cock filling you; I’ll give it to you.” You’re in a lust-driven fog; you feel like you’re obeying him as you slide a third finger in. You feel incredibly full, and you can’t stop remembering how your fingers had to stretch to fully wrap around his cock. He’s right; three fingers are more realistic for imagining him inside you. You whimper again, and it’s silent for a moment.

“Fingering yourself, Y/n?”

At first you’re confused why he’s repeating himself, but then you realize that his tone is different this time; it’s less sex-fueled and more knowing, more amused. Fuck.

He pulls the shower curtain back with a snap; you don’t have time to pull your hand from your shorts, and he’s looking at you, hair soaking wet and plastered to his forehead, his erect cock in his hand.

“I—” you squeak, face aflame. “I’m—I was—” you realize your hand is still between your legs, and you yank it out quickly. It makes both of you moan—you at the loss, and Brendon at seeing how your fingers shine with your arousal.

“You here because you need some help, darlin?”

“Fuck,” you whimper, staring at his naked body and the way his fist is wrapped around his erection. The water is dripping down his body, his cock is throbbing, and he looks like he’s moments from coming. You want to watch, you want to make him come, you want him to keep groaning your name. You want him.

Brendon extends a hand, smiling at you softly. There’s no way you can spin this. You’re inside his bathroom, listening to him jerk off, and you’ve got your hand in your shorts. It’s obvious what’s happening. You’re in too deep; you might as well give in.

“Oh, hell,” you mutter, stripping your shirt off and shoving your shorts down before accepting his hand.

The water is hot, and you gasp as he presses himself to your back; you whimper when his mouth finds the back of your neck, and his hand reaches down to tease your entrance. “Brendon,” you moan when he slips two fingers into you; he groans that you’re so fucking tight, and he’s right, you are. He feels so good, and you desperately want more. His dick is pressed against your ass now, and you’re grinding back against him. “Give me three, let me really imagine your cock filling my pussy,” you beg.

“You heard that, huh?” He grins and bites gently at your neck. “Yeah, baby, I’ll give you three.” He pulls his fingers out instead; when you protest, he nips at your earlobe. “Patience. Need to do this right; don’t want to hurt you.” He stretches for a bottle of silicone lubricant on the built-in shower shelf, and you squirm against him happily. His cock throbs against you while he pours the lubricant over his fingers; you spread your legs and lean back against his chest. “There we are,” Brendon murmurs, sliding three slick fingers against you. “Now I can take care of my girl.” Your heart lurches happily at his words, but before you can comment, his fingers are back inside you.

“Darlin,” he murmurs, his breath hot in your ear. “You gonna make me promise not to talk about this later?” You let out a wordless whimper, and he bites down before sucking hard. “Because honestly, that’s just not going to work for me.” You gasp, and he grins, lips pressed to your skin. “If I’m doing this, if we’re doing this, it’s because you want me. Not just because you want to get off.”

“God, Brendon,” you sigh, arching your back and rubbing against his cock. “Yes.”

“Yes, you want me?” His voice is soft. “Or,” and his fingers stop moving in you, making you whine. “Yes, you’re gonna make me promise not to bring it up?”

“You,” you manage, grabbing his wrist and trying to get him to move again. “You.”

“More specific, honey.” He bites down again in a new spot as his fingers flex; you go limp against him with a soft cry, and he wraps his free arm around your waist. “Yes or no, do you want me? Beyond sex—do you want to be with me? Because that’s how I want you. Been driving me fucking crazy since that night; I can’t stop thinking about you. Have wanted you for so long.”

“Yes,” you whisper, rolling your head back on his shoulder.

“Yes or no, you’re going to let us talk about this later.”

“Yes,” you repeat, turning in his arms and clinging to him. His mouth crushes over yours; you kiss him urgently, desperately. “Yes, yes, yes,” you murmur between kisses, your hips rocking as you press his cock between you. “Yes.”

“Good,” Brendon says simply, sinking to his knees. You become aware of his thick bath mat, and you file that away for future reference before your mind goes blank. His arm around your waist tugs you closer; he nudges your legs apart with his shoulder. “Spread these perfect legs for me.”

“Fuck,” you breathe, both hands on his shoulders. “Brendon.”

“Yes, darlin?” He looks up at you from between your legs, and you whimper, your nails digging into his shoulders. He looks so serious; there’s not a hint of playfulness in his expression now. “Is this okay?”

“Yes,” you repeat, and he smiles faintly, biting his lip. You can read his mind. “I do know other words besides ‘fuck,’ ‘Brendon,’ and ‘yes,’” you manage, and he licks between your legs. “Fuck!”

“I’m sure you do,” he murmurs, “but I’m not sure that you’ll need them in the near future.” And with that, his face is pressed between your legs, licking and sucking eagerly as his fingers work their way up the back of your thigh. He laps at your clit tenderly and, when you’re moaning, he slips three fingers deep inside you from behind.

“Fuck!” You cling to him. You honestly think you could come right now if he told you to. Instead, he moans against you. It vibrates up through your body; you bend over, clutching his head. “Brendon,” you choke. “Please.”

“There’s a new word,” he mumbles, fingers speeding up while his tongue moves in gentle circles. “A good word. Please, what?”

“More,” you pant, hips rocking against his face. “More, baby, please.”

“Darlin,” he moans, grabbing one of your legs and guiding it over a shoulder. He’s breathing hard and licking over you longingly. “Love when you ask so sweetly.” His can fingers go deep now that you’re spread wide with a leg draped over one of his shoulders; you gasp, hips spasming. “More?”

“More,” you moan, nodding frantically and leaning back against the shower wall for leverage. “I can take more; give me more—really eat it, eat my pussy, B; oh fuck!” Brendon groans again, and his tongue goes deep between his fingers, rubbing alongside them as his lips close over you. He’s sliding them over you so gently while his tongue strokes you, and you think you may lose your mind from how good he is at eating you out.

“Oh god,” you whimper, tugging at his hair. “Oh fuck, Brendon!”

He nods against you, and his tongue presses and rubs; you cry out with your orgasm, legs shaking and trembling. His tongue and fingers keep going, keep pushing you over the edge, and his arm around your waist tightens when your legs give out; you slide off of him and drop to your knees. You’re both breathing hard, kneeling on the floor of his shower, with steam and hot water flooding your senses. He’s smiling at you so brilliantly, and you moan, pulling his mouth to yours. Both arms tangle around your waist and he pulls you flush against him, one of his legs slotting between yours. You whimper into his kiss and grind tentatively on his thigh, both of you gasping at the feeling.

“Hang on, darlin,” Brendon groans. “I can make it better.” He stretches an arm to reach behind him, and when he brings his hand back, you see the bottle of silicone lube again. Without taking his eyes off you, he pops the lid and pours it freely onto his thigh; you start moving again, and the ease with which you can ride his thigh now makes you louder than ever. “Ride it, grind this sweet pussy all over me, make yourself feel good.”

“Want you to feel good too,” you murmur, rocking your hips fervently. “Want you to feel good.”

“Trust me,” he grunts, grabbing your hair and pulling you in for a long, heated kiss. “Trust me, I feel good. You feel so good.”

“Yeah?” You nuzzle a spot under his ear, and he groans, grabbing your ass with both hands and moving you faster, pressing you down harder. “You like this?”

“Only thing better than feeling your sweet cunt against my thigh would be feeling you on my cock,” Brendon whispers in your ear, tongue flicking out to tease the shell, making you shiver. “But it’s okay if you’re not—if it’s too—”

“Brendon,” you whimper, squeezing his erection firmly. “Yes. I want to.” You reach down between your legs to collect some of the silicone lube, and, watching him longingly, you start stroking a slick hand over his cock.

“Fuck, darlin,” he moans, kissing you gently, his tongue brushing yours. You clutch the back of his head, your other hand still stroking fervently while your hips roll. “Gonna let me get you on my cock and make you feel so damn good?”

“Please,” you manage, kissing down his neck. “Please.” He jerks back suddenly and you moan at the loss, but he’s climbing carefully to his feet and tugging you up too. “Brendon,” you gasp, and his lips are on yours as he pushes you up against the shower wall, nipping and sucking down your neck and collarbone. “Brendon, please.”

“Yeah, darlin, say my name.” He’s rocking against your thigh, cock slick with pre-cum and whatever he was using to jack off earlier, and you cry out. “I remember you liking how rough I fingered you,” he whispers in your ear. “You like getting fucked that way too?”

“Yes,” you whimper, spreading your legs on the mat, grateful for its traction keeping you upright. “Yes.”

“Shit, Y/n,” he groans, one hand gripping his cock as he guides it to your opening. “I’ve been thinking about this, about you, since—”

“Me too,” you admit, spreading your legs slightly to sink down on him. “Oh god!”

“Y/n,” Brendon grunts as he sheathes himself in you fully. “Your cunt—god, you’re incredible.” He grabs both of your hands with his and pins them over your head, thrusting into you quick and shallow. “Honey, if you’ve been thinking about it too—I gotta know, why did you go to bed that night without letting us talk about it?”

“Thought you thought it was a mistake,” you groan, crying out happily when he tugs at your hair.

“You’re the one who asked if it was,” Brendon points out, and you whine, nodding. “I never said I thought it was. Just asked you—and then you went to bed and made me promise the next day to never bring it up.”

“Got scared,” you admit. “Was self-conscious and scared, and—harder,” you pant, pushing your hips into his to meet his thrusts. “Harder, fuck me harder.” He groans and speeds up while going deeper, making you cry out with every stroke.

“Yes!” You squeal when he angles himself slightly and presses right where you want him with the head of his cock. “Fuck, yes, Brendon, yes, yes!”

“Up,” he commands, one hand leaving yours to grab your thigh. “You’re not going anywhere; I won’t let you fall.” You nod and carefully wrap a leg around his hips. “Other one too.” You lift the other, and he bites a spot low on your neck. “Don’t be scared. I’ve got you. I want you. Want this,” he groans, hips rocking again. “Want us. Want you to be mine, want to be yours.”

“Brendon,” you gasp, tightening your legs around him. “Please. Please.”

“What do you need, darlin?”

“Make me come,” you beg, hands tangled with his as he holds them over your head. “Make me come. I’m yours, all yours. Make me come.”

“Mine. Darlin, if you don’t come on my cock, I’m going to spank you.”

“Oh shit,” you whimper. “Bren, I—I love—getting—”

He grins. “You love getting spanked?” You nod, and he thrusts into you harder. “I knew it. I knew I had a wild girl on my hands.”

“On your cock,” you correct with a breathless laugh, and Brendon laughs too before grabbing the showerhead and aiming it against your clit. “Oh god, yes—fuck—Brendon, hold it right there—god, yes! Just thinking about you spanking me—and it’s right on my clit, baby, yes oh god—Brendon, please, please—oh!” You fall apart, crying his name, and he kisses you hard, hips snapping forward as he fucks you through your climax.

“Honey, I’m fucking close,” he groans. “If you want me to pull out, I will, but you gotta tell me—Y/n, I’m gonna—tell me now!”

“Oh god, in me,” you pant, your legs tightening around his waist. “In me, I want you to come in me, fucking give me everything.”

“Fuck,” Brendon grunts, burying his face in your neck. You can feel him pulsing in you, can feel the warmth spreading, and you close your eyes. You desperately want to remember this moment forever. When his breathing evens out against your skin, you carefully untangle your legs from his body.

“Fuck, B, that was so damn good.”

“Yes,” Brendon groans, kissing you. “Yes, it was.” He reaches to the side and turns off the water before opening the curtain and snatching a towel to wrap around you. “Here, darlin.” He kisses your forehead, and you melt, hugging him tightly. “Sweet girl,” he murmurs, holding you to him. “Y/n—can I take you to bed? Want you in my bed.”

“Yes,” you whisper, and he twists your hair into a rope around his hand, wringing it out gently. “Please.”

-||-

“You’re unreal,” he moans, sucking on one of your nipples as you writhe under him. “You’re incredible, darlin.”

“You’re not half-bad yourself,” you say with a short laugh. “B, I’m so sorry I got scared and didn’t let us talk about that night. About us.” You reach over to stroke his cock. “Hard again,” you marvel and he grins, switching breasts.

“Easy when my bed partner looks like this,” he murmurs against your skin. “Darlin, no need to apologize. We’re here now; we’ve talked. God, I’m just glad we finally got our shit together.”

You whimper in agreement, and he sucks harder, one hand moving down between your legs. “Love those sounds you make for me.” He sighs when his fingers trace through your heat. “Wet again,” he says in a tone that matches yours. You smile and tug at his hair.

“Easy when my bed partner looks like this,” you tease, gasping when his fingers slide into you. “Oh, Brendon, baby, yes.”

“Or it could just be that my girl let me come in her, and that’s why her hot cunt is so slick,” Brendon murmurs, grinning when you moan. “Have I mentioned how much I love when you say yes?” He’s shifting to hover over you. “Can I have you?”

“Yes,” you sigh happily as he pulls his fingers out and thrusts into you gently. “Yes.”

“I’m gonna be slow and gentle with you this time,” Brendon tells you, kissing your cheek. “Loved having you in the shower like that, but I want you every way. You deserve to be loved slowly and deeply, and I’m gonna be the one to do it.”

“Yes,” you repeat. “Brendon, yes.”

“God, darlin, don’t know which I love more, my name on your lips or you telling me yes.”

“I could, oh fuck, say another name,” you tease, and his eyes narrow playfully. “I think we have your answer then.”

“Damn right. I’m yours, and I’m committed; I want you to be committed too. I want you to be mine. I want to be the only one making you feel like this. I want to be the only one getting to see you come undone, getting to feel you take my cum. I want to be the only one fucking you, making love to you, getting you coming like this. Yes?”

“Yes,” you agree breathlessly. “Yes. Have wanted you, have needed you for so long. I only need you, and I only want you. You’re mine, Bren, and I’m only yours.”

“Good,” Brendon murmurs, leaning down to brush his lips over yours. “We’ll talk more later, but Y/n, I’m entirely yours. You know that means I love you, right?” You smile radiantly and nod. “And you love me, don’t you?” Brendon’s voice is soft, hopeful.

“Yes.”

[something-tofightfor]

Smutsgiving Feast 2023: White Wine / Marcus Pike

Pairing: Marcus Pike x Female reader

Word Count: 1,293

Rating: M.

Author's Note: This - like all of these - will be smutty, but none are going to be outright graphic. Barely edited in the name of getting these scheduled throughout the day - I'll fix errors before adding these to the masterlist for the event.

Thank you for reading... and enjoy your first Thanksgiving treat.

Summary: Marcus makes an awful day much better.

Traffic was a nightmare. 

You’d left work with plenty of time to spare - or so you’d thought - before you had to be ready to head to Marcus’ team Friendsgiving. But thirty five minutes after you should have been home, you were at a standstill, and nearly twenty minutes away from home. 

Groaning, you gripped the steering wheel and lowered your head to rest it against your knuckles, trying to steady yourself. It’s fine. As long as I get home before 6, we’ll make it. I just won’t be able to spend as much time getting ready. 

At the sound of a hoking horn, you raised your head, narrowing your eyes at the cars surrounding you. “It’s not like we’re going anywhere. Honking won’t help.” Pinching the bridge of your nose, you sighed again. “Or will it?” 

The sea of brake lights ahead of you had no answers. 

— 

Forty five minutes later, you parked your car, giving yourself exactly five seconds to steady your breathing before heading for your front door. You didn’t even bother bringing your work stuff inside - not only were you behind, you didn’t want to think about the office until the following week, when you had to be back. 

The house was quiet as you stepped into the entryway, the only light coming from the living room and spilling softly into the otherwise dark hallway. “Marcus? I’m home. I’m sorry I’m late, I just need to change, and…. Shit.” Swearing when you dropped your keys onto the small table next to the door, you stared dumbly at the empty wine bag that you planned on taking with you to dinner. Except there’s supposed to be a bottle of wine in there. And I was supposed to pick it up on my way home. “Fuck.” 

Gripping the edge of the table, you lowered your head, fighting back frustrated tears. You’d assured Marcus that you’d stop and pick up the bottle on your way home, waving off his concern that the Tuesday before Thanksgiving would be busy. Everyone travels on Wednesday, you’d assured him. It won’t be a problem. 

“I was wrong.” Scoffing, you scrubbed a hand over your face. “And -”

“Hey, you.” Marcus’ quiet voice interrupted your pity party, and when you looked up, you saw him leaning against the wall a few feet away, arms crossed over his chest - and the soft gray sweater he’d chosen. “You made it.” 

“I forgot the wine, Marcus. Traffic was really bad, and I didn’t even think to stop, and now we don’t have time. All we have in the kitchen are those cheap bottles, and -”

“Slow down.” He moved closer, holding a hand out to you. “It’s alright.” Your fingertips met his, the heat of Marcus’ touch immediately calming you, even before he’d tugged you closer and wrapped his other arm around you in a hug. “Come with me.” 

“We don’t have time, I need to change, and -”

“We do. Annette called me a little while ago and asked us to come a little later. Scott’s stuck in traffic, too… and he’s got half the food in his car.” You let out a small sigh of relief at his words, allowing Marcus to lead you into the living room and to the couch. “You need to relax for a few minutes before you do anything.” 

He pulled you down next to him on the comfortable cushions, one of his arms around your shoulders. You let yourself melt into his side, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath. Wait. “Marcus, if we have extra time, we can stop on the way and get a bottle of -”

“Not necessary.” Turning his head, he kissed your temple. “When I figured you were stuck in traffic, I went out and grabbed what we needed.” 

“What?” Shifting so that you could look at him, you blinked in confusion. “You did?” Marcus nodded, his smile growing. “Why isn’t it in the bag? I -”

“It’s in the fridge.” He ran his knuckles along your shoulder, shrugging. “It was warm.” It was a simple thing, but you still felt a surge of affection for him, more of the tension and frustration dissipating as you took a steadying breath. “I told you it was alright.” 

You’d been with him for less than a year, so there was still plenty that you had to learn about him, but the one thing you were certain of when it came to Marcus Pike was that he was thoughtful - and that was putting it mildly. “Thank you.” Closing your eyes, you let out a long exhale. “God, Marcus traffic today was awful. It was like every single person in the DC Metro area was trying to go to the exact same place, and I got stuck behind all of them.” 

“Well you’re home now.” He narrowed his eyes playfully, shrugging. “And I’ll drive tonight. No problem.”

Neither of you said anything after that. Instead, you stared at him, your gaze lingering on Marcus’ face, as it often did. “What would I do without you, Agent Pike?” 

“Hopefully you won’t ever have to find out.” He said it simply, the man’s expression and tone unchanging. “Now c’mere and let me kiss you.” You wasted no time complying, leaning closer and tilting your head, eyes halfway shut even before his mouth met yours. 

The way Marcus kissed was unlike any other man you’d ever been with. From the moment you’d met him, his focus on you had been almost tangible, and that feeling had only grown over the months you’d known him. Especially on days like today. Sighing, you parted your lips and felt him do the same, one of his large palms settling against the base of your skull while he held you in place, the man’s tongue probing gently into your mouth. 

You were disappointed when you pulled back to breathe, your eyes still closed even as you spoke. “Marcus, wait. We don’t have time, and -”

“We’ve got enough.” He hummed, his other hand landing on your thigh and squeezing. “You feeling any better?” You were, and you told him as much, nodding while you backed away and met his eyes again. “Good. We’re off for the next five days, and I don’t want to start out on a shitty note.” 

That made you laugh, Marcus’ fingers tightening at the sound. “We’ll see how shitty it gets when we get back in the car, hmm?” He rolled his eyes but then got serious, the look in them changing and making you suck in a breath. I know that look. I -

“Maybe we both need to relax before we head out.” His thumb moved in a slow arc along the inside of your thigh, a muscle in his jaw twitching. “Got any ideas how we can make that happen?” If he’s doing this then we really do have time.

“Plenty.” You moved swiftly, repositioning yourself so that you were straddling his lap, Marcus leaning all the way back against the couch cushions and staring at you. “And we can stay right here for most of ‘em.” His hands moved to your waist and then lower, following your curves. “How does that sound?” 

“Sounds perfect.” He smiled, the expression deepening the dimple on his cheek - which you reached up to stroke with one thumb. It does. Marcus shifted beneath you, his hips lifting just enough to make contact with your core. Oh, that felt … he’s already… You ground down on him without even thinking about it, Marcus’ eyes closing and his grip tightening, urging you even closer. “See?” 

You nodded and then moved to kiss him again, your bodies falling into a familiar rhythm as your hips rolled forward and his thrust upward, instinct taking over. 

— 

[applejuicefruit]

Hello dear, I am in love with your writings. Could you pretty please write something about reader trying to move on from her previous relationship and Kylian being there for her. Or may be something like where Kylian asks the reader to choose between him and her ex. Some angst stuff.

Thank You

Hiii thank you for requesting this ⭐️

I hope you like it ❤️

Let’s pretend your boyfriend in this one is named Carl 🌚 he’s useless by the way

Forbidden Love

Kylian was your best friend. You’ve been best friends since when you were kids. You would play football with him and he would let you practice make up on his face. His parents loved you and your parents loved him.

You were inseparable. Until you grew up.

You were still best friends but due to the fact that he was one of the most football players in the world and you were always busy with university it was basically impossible for you two see each other every single day.

You were also dating and Kylian always tried to avoid you when you were out with your boyfriend, you’ve never understood why.

Your boyfriend Carl was everything you ever dreamed of. He was kind and sweet, passionate and loyal.

You’ve been dating for over two years, you moved into your first apartment together just a couple of months ago and you couldn’t be happier. Or so you thought.

One night you were getting home late from university because you stayed a little bit more to help some friends study and due to the fact that it was raining so bad and you got stuck into the parisian traffic at 9 pm.

Of course you told Carl you were getting home later than usual but poor boy, he thought you were getting home around midnight so he had the brilliant idea of inviting a “friend” over.

You didn’t know.

So when you got home instead of being welcomed by the arms of your boyfriend you got welcomed with moans coming from your bedroom.

You dropped everything on the floor and went straight into the bedroom and the moment you opened the door you saw something you’ve never wished to see.

Carl on top of her best friend praising her and loaning her name like he did with you.

They were so lost in each other that they didn’t even hear you.

“Carl?” you called him in a soft voice hoping this was only a joke

“Babe-babe what are you doing here? he asked, face full of worry now

“I live here…or so I thought”

“No baby it’s not what it looks like” he tried to excuse himself

“No I think it’s perfectly clear…” you said with eyes full of tears “I’ll come back tomorrow to pack all of my things” and with that you left the room, him chasing you

“No baby let’s talk about it”

“There’s nothing to talk about Carl…I only hope she was worth it” you said leaving your apartment. Legally it was his apartment, he was the one who signed all the papers so you had one night to figure out where to live for the rest of your life.

You went straight into your car, forgetting your umbrella at home and getting soaked by the heavy rain.

You started driving with nowhere to go.

You wanted to cry and scream but you had to remain focused on the road.

While you were driving in the pouring rain you called the only person you could think of.

“Hello?” the voice on the other side of the phone responded. It sounded like he was resting or sleeping and you felt so bad for bothering him but you had no one in that moment

“Kylian?” you called him, you voice cracking

“Hey y/n are you okay?” he asked immediately worried when he heard your voice

“Yes. No” you sobbed

“Chèrie where are you? Do you want me to pick you up?” he sounded worried and you felt so bad for making him worrying for basically nothing

“No…I’m driving” you cried harder

“You shouldn’t be driving in this weather, where are you?”

“I just passed the Eiffel Tower, I have no idea where I’m going honestly” you said, your voice soft and low

“Honey I need you to focus…are you hurt? Drunk? Did something happened?”

“No Kylian…yes something happened I just-“ you sobbed harder “I don’t know what to do…” you sounded desperate but truth was you wanted only your best friend comfort in that moment

“Y/n honey I’ll pick you up”

“No don’t worry about it…I shouldn’t have called you” you said feeling guilty

“You’re my best friend and I’m here for you, no matter what, if you don’t want to to pick you up at least come to my place…I don’t like you driving in the pouring rain when it’s so dark outside” he said honestly

“Are you sure?”

“Yes of course, I’ll wait for you”

“Thank you” you said hanging up

Just ten minutes later and you were in front of Kylian’s house debating if you should go inside or not.

Eventually you got out of your car and let rain soaking your hair and dress. You knocked on Kylian’s door and just two seconds later he opened his door for you.

“Y/n-shit what happened?” he asked you and looked at you with a concerned face. Your eyes were wet from crying, your mascara all over your face, you were shivering from the cold and the rain, your hair completely ruined by the rain and you couldn’t stop sobbing.

“Come here” he said letting you inside and hugging you

“I’m gonna get all of your clothes dirty” you said

“I don’t care about my clothes in this moment, honey what happened?” he looked straight into your eyes feeling he already knew the answer but waited for you to talk

“It’s my fault honestly…” you said not knowing where to begin

“Princess calm down…you know what? Go and take a shower, I’ll give some of my clothes so you can change and then we’ll talk, okay?” he asked you softly and you simply nodded to traumatised to even talk.

You showered and then sat next to Kylian on the couch.

He gave you a cup of tea to drink.

“Are you feeling better?” he asked looking at you and you simply nodded “can you tell me what’s going on? why were you driving in this weather instead of being at home?” he asked you concerned

“he cheated” you said taking a deep breath “and i saw him, cheating on me…with his best friend, they were” and tears started to falling out of your eyes again “he fucked her, in our bed…in our bedroom, my safe place and he wasn’t even sorry” you kept sobbing and Kylian put his arms around you in a comforting hug.

He was so mad at your boyfriend. He had the most precious and kind woman by his side and he dared to cheat? It wasn’t a secret Kylian had a crush on you. Everyone knew. His family knew, his friend knew, everyone except you.

But he never said anything because he saw how Carl made you happy even if right now he just wanted to punch him in the face. He had no right to make you suffer like this. Kylian was so mad he was shaking but he tried to calm down because in that moment you needed him.

“He’s a dick” Kylian said “he doesn’t deserve you, he doesn’t deserve your tears y/n. You deserve so much more”

“I know but still…it hurts” you sobbed against his shoulder while his hand was massaging your back “I really loved him and I still love him” you confessed and in that moment Kylian’s heart broke “you can’t stop loving someone in one night…but I thought he was happy…”

“It’s not your fault y/n…he’s the one who decided to fuck up two years of relationship” he reassured you

“You should have seen her…his best friend, she’s gorgeous. Tall, slim, perfect eyes and long hair, full of confidence. You would be in love with her too” you said “she’s just perfect, everything I’m not”

“No don’t say this. You’re beautiful y/n, more than what you think” he said looking straight into your eyes

“You’re saying this because you’re my best friend Kylian”

“I’m saying this because it’s true” he cupped your cheek wiping your tears “you’re so beautiful in and out and you deserve so much better than this. You deserve someone who loves you, respects you, worships you and puts you first…cheaters will cheat, it’s in their dna, so don’t ever think again that it was your fault okay?”

“okay” you said smiling a bit “but I told him I would get all of my stuff from the apartment, Kylian I have nowhere to go”

“You can stay here. I’ll give you my guest bedroom and you can’t say no. We’ll have sleepovers like when we were kids, just say yes”

“Okay fine” you laughed

“Perfect. I’ll get your stuff tomorrow so you don’t have to see him again” he said hoping you would agree with his idea because he didn’t want you to see Carl again.

“You sure?”

“Yes I’m sure” he said confidently

“Okay thanks” you hugged him again “you’re the best! Literally the best friend I could ever ask for…thank you so much Kylian”

He smiled at you, trying not to show you his sad face and his heart breaking. He really wanted to be more than friends but right now you weren’t in the right mindset and he was fine with being just your best friend and support you in any way.

Kylian wrapped his arms around you and let you rest in his arms, stroking your hair and massaging your arm. He was happy to have you there so you could spend more time together. Someday you’ll see what you could have with Kylian, and not only as best friends but maybe something more.

[writercole]

Cowboy Take Me Away

Summary: A tough week gets the best of her but Rhett makes sure she knows he’s always got her back. Words: 700 Warnings: fluff, accusations of infidelity, slight angst Credits: @princessmisery666 for looking over it for me. Thanks, Opie. I love you! A/N: I’ve had a rough go of it lately. Gimme a break.

The days had all started to blur together. Wake up, work, go home, eat, sleep. And it was starting to wear her down. Rhett noticed how instead of sitting up and reading after dinner, she would shower and climb into bed, falling asleep before he could finish cleaning himself up.

There was really no one for him to get advice from. His mom never worked outside of the ranch so she didn’t get it. Rebecca was long gone. Maria left town after the rodeo season had wrapped, the same rodeo that Amy disappeared at.

Rhett could think of only one thing to do.

She dragged herself through the door, grateful that it was the weekend and there was a bottle of wine chilled and waiting for her. But as she kicked off her shoes in the hallway, she noticed that Rhett’s work boots were in the tray, yet the house was silent. The shower was off, the kitchen was empty.

Her heart sank when she hung her jacket. His good boots were gone.

Rhett was a little behind schedule. The bed and breakfast was completely set up but he had hit traffic on the way home. She would definitely beat him home. He hoped she didn’t see the suitcases under the stairs. He wanted this to be a surprise. 

The house was dark and quiet when he crept up the porch steps, a fistful of bluebonnets behind his back.

“Angel?” he called as he slipped in the door. “Baby girl, are you here?”

He strained to pick up on any sounds, heading for the stairs before a muted sniffle sounded to his left. Spinning towards the sound, his feet carried him to the living room. Switching on a lamp, he found his girlfriend curled up in his armchair, a glass of wine in her hand and silent tears streaming down her face.

“Angel, what’s wrong?” Rhett asked softly as he crouched in front of her.

“Just tell me,” she croaked.

“Tell you what?”

“Tell me you’re going out to meet some girl and that you’re moving out.” Her voice was barely a whisper, her gaze deliberately avoiding his face as her tears fell to her shirt.

“Where did you ever - baby, the only girl I’m meeting is you,” he assured her, pulling the bouquet from behind his back.

“So why are you off early and dressed up?” she pressed, still skeptical of the situation but finally meeting his gaze.

“Because I set up a weekend away for us. I was working on the final bits and got stuck behind a combine. I was supposed to meet you here.”

“You did?” she whispered. Her face twisted with guilt and regret, relief filling the small spaces left in her eyes.

“I know you’ve heard that I’m a good-for-nothing second son man whore but you gotta know that you’re the only girl I even look at,” he continued, cupping her cheek with his rough, calloused palm. “I love you and only you.”

His words broke a dam deep inside of her and she began sobbing, throwing her arms around his neck, nearly knocking him off balance.

“Angel, it’s okay,” he whispered in her ear while his hand rubbed her back soothingly.

“No, Rhett, it’s not,” she sniffled quietly. “You went out of your way to do such a beautiful, wonderful thing for me and I accused you of having another woman.”

“Hey, look at me,” he said, “with your past and my reputation, what else were you going to think? I know these things aren’t easily undone and I’m not hurt or disappointed. I get it, angel, I get it.”

“I love you, Rhett,” she hiccuped, wiping her nose with her sleeve. “You’re so good to me.”

“Do you want to go on our little adventure? I’m okay with canceling and staying home,” he offered as he wiped her tears, his sky blue eyes searching her face for an answer.

“We are absolutely not canceling,” she scoffed. “You planned this weekend for me. I definitely need it. Just let me get cleaned up and then, cowboy, you can whisk me away. No phones, no people. Just us.”

“Just us, angel. Just us.”

[suginami-division]

Shuu’s Thoughts on Fukuoka Division

Eko Seishin

“OMG Aoi?! Why is he…? I thought Traffic Light disbanded?! Wait, they reformed to become OverDrive? Why didn’t I know about that? Well… I guess I’m focused on all this other stuff, not including the D.R.B. we’re stuck in. Soon as Aoi-chan had posted that they were disbanding, I just moved on to other idol groups, ehehe…Sorry!”

“Then, it makes sense that Aoi-chan is leading this team. I just can’t say that he’s my favorite member. His attitude on stage always felt… Forced? I dunno, but I wasn’t into his performance back then. I wonder if maybe doing rap instead will change up his spirits. Only one way to find out though, right?”

Mai Yousei

“Shuiro-chan~! See, Mai-chan was always my favorite. Their moves were always so smooth. I wonder if Mai-chan is just as cheery as they were on stage in their Traffic Light days. I saw their attitude as an inspiration for me to stay positive about the grim parts of my work. Hearts might be broken and tears might fall, but I knew my clients were on their way to a better path… Wah, I can’t wait to finally meet Shuiro-chan! Being in the D.R.B. has been a huge dream come true. If I didn’t accept Ryu-chan’s invitation, I would have never gotten the chance to meet people like Shuiro-chan!”

Yuno Kamora

“K-Kiiro… Yuno has been pretty busy, with the Kamora Files stuff. I can’t say I’m not opposed to it? I just never thought he hated criminals that much. It’s kinda scary, ehehe… Like Jack, kinda. Funny how both of them are butlers with these weird secrets. But while Yuno is just hellbent on jailing anyone who made any slight crimes, Jack is… It feels like he’s trying to satisfy the orders of somebody while juggling the need to be ‘good’. So I guess if I were forced to side with a suspicious butler, I’d choose Jack? Besides, I’m sure a Kamora File with my teammates is gonna pop up. I-I don’t think he’d try to write about me. I get to solve crimes sometimes, but not often. So that should mean I’m on his nice list, right? Right?”

"Who am I kidding. Somehow Dai-chan got written up about his 'crimes'. That poor boy is trying to do good, he isn't bad! Yuno made him cry!"

OverDrive

“I never expected to see Traffic Li- I mean OverDrive, together again. I mean, like I said earlier, I thought they were doing their own things! I mean, sure looks like they are pursuing their own interests. Aoi-chan is still an idol, but Shuiro-chan is focused even more on dance, and Kiiro-chan is a butler with a writing job on the side! I wonder how their fans feel about their change in careers… Well, I know what I’m gonna do when I get back home today! Gonna have fun reading all the forums talking about these three~”

[thotsforvillainrights]

(Draft Release)

~Sleep Deprived Parents~

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up|drabble

“Please Tomoko, I’m begging you here.” Skeptic’s raspy voice rang out over your daughter’s nonstop crying reign. She’d been like this for about 3 days now and the both of you were near the edge of passing out. Unfortunately she’d contracted some sort of inner ear infection which the doctor warned would throw her way off her zone. Also unfortunate that the 3 year old was able to scream as loudly as she did. It was painful to know your baby was hurting so bad, but you didn’t felt too much remorse in being able to say you just wanted 5 minutes of sleep. Skeptic recommended melatonin gummies for kids but you quickly shut that down saying how you didn’t want to resort to drugging her no matter how badly you needed the rest. No one in the MLA could take Tomoko off your hands either! Geten simply refused as he of course didn’t want to be stuck with a fussy toddler, Chitose was wrapped up with interview until the next week, Hanabata was out of town for some sort of political conference, and ReDestro would be drowning in work for Detnerat’s new products until the next month! It was lucky enough Skeptic was able to use vacation time to stay home with you but he secretly wished he was at work instead of getting his eardrums blasted for the fifteenth time today. It was worse on him since his little girl gravitated toward him naturally. Something she was doing right now...

“No way, you get back around that corner Y/N!” Skeptic shouted as you tried to creep away toward the bedroom while Tomoko was focused on her father. “I hate to admit it but I think I might go lay down in traffic soon.” You groaned before taking a seat next to him on the couch. Was this life now? Sure being a parent wasn’t going to be all cute moments with your child. Obviously times like these were also a part of it but still drove both of you up the wall. You were 2 minutes from a panic attack when the phone suddenly rang. You ignored Skeptic’s complaints when you jumped up to answer it first. This was your excuse to leave the room and have a break from the shrill screaming. Tomoyasu made a mental note to be quicker answering the phone next time as he began trying (but failing again) to shush your baby girl. In the other room you heard a familiar voice over the line. “Hello, Y/N?” The soft tone of a woman spoke out. You sighed in relief and laughed lightly. “H-hi! To what do I owe the pleasure?” The voice over the line chuckled. “Well I was just calling to check in on you two but judging by the screaming in the next room I can tell things might not be going so well. Am I correct?” You frowned at your mother in law’s words. “Yeah...unfortunately you’re right. Tomoko is going through an ear ache and it’s killing both of us too. I don’t want my baby to hurt like this and the medicine hasn’t kicked in yet. I feel bad for being annoyed by the crying but it’s driving the both of us insane. I don’t know what to do.” You were sniffling just a bit at the thought of possibly failing with the whole parenthood thing until you heard Skeptic’s mom laugh quietly. “Oh dear, this reminds me of something. Tomoyasu was such a fussy little man when he was younger. He hated falling asleep and try as we might, his father and I were starting to lose our minds when he went though that phase. Do you know what helped us? Driving.”

“Driving?” You slightly tilt your head to the side. “Mhmm, driving indeed helped. We put Tomoyasu in his carseat and drove him around the neighborhood 2 or 3 times until he’d fallen asleep. It may sound silly but it got us through the next few months until he’d turned 4. I don’t doubt it’ll help you both. Go give it a try and call me back tomorrow after the two of you have caught up on sleep.” You thanked her and bid a goodbye before heading into the living room and staring at the sight in front of you. It was rare when you saw real tears in Skeptic’s eyes like this. Without a word, you opened your arms and grabbed the toddler as she continued sobbing out. You nodded at Skeptic to follow you before passing the key holder and grabbing your keys off the wall. He was too tired and worn out to question anything so he followed along without a complaint. To say the two of you were relieved would be an understatement. About 2 circles around the neighborhood led to your baby slowly silencing herself from sobbing to sniffles to snores. Skeptic looked at you incredulously and you smiled widely back at him. “Thank your mom, not me. Now let’s get her inside before she realizes what just happened.” He nodded quickly and carefully navigated his daughter out of the carseat when the two of you pulled back into your own driveway. The hack was successful for the amount of time you needed before the medicine finally played it’s role. 

[tim-shii]

"i remember it all too well" prt. 1

sypnosis: a reminiscence of a love once cherished

features: bachira, rin, reo, sae, isagi, nagi

a/n: i need to stop playing hsr its consuming almost all hours of my life n e ways here's bllk boys w some lyrics from all to well (10 mins version)(taylor's version) 😧 also ☝ angst is not my forte i apologize if the angst parts seemed off i tried my best 😞 HAHAHAHAHA

“you almost ran the red 'cause you were lookin' over at me”

bachira meguru was an eccentric lover. he likes to have fun and takes you on dates you’d never even expect. one time, during your second date, he took you out to go bungee jumping. you were frozen on the platform for 30 minutes while he was down there, cheering you on with a stupid smile on his face and his phone recording you. 

right now, you guys are on the way home after a day at a cat cafe. they were really cute but their fur all over you was not cute at all. you look out the window, admiring the view as the car sped through the road. you hold back a laugh as you pass by a squirrel falling down a tree with its acorn stuck in the branch. you turn to tell bachira when you notice he’s already looking at you.

“eyes on the road!”

“i got my eye on you.” and to push it further, he points two fingers in your direction. sighing lighty, you shove his face to turn to the road. “you can eye me later if we don’t die.”

bachira whips his head to look at you accusingly. “excuse me?! my driving skills are maxed out, you know. and besides, who’s the one with the license between us, huh? that’s right. me. bachira megu–” “yeah, yeah. shut up.” you try to shush him however that seemed to only seethe him more. more screams of fury and annoyance comes from bachira. you were only seconds away from tuning him out when you saw the traffic light glow red. immediately, you urged bachira to step on the brakes. with the panic in your voice, he abides at once. 

now at a stop sign, deep breaths coming from the two of you fill the vehicle. giggles and laughter following after. “oh my god, stop laughing, meguru.” he halts his laughter. playfully gesturing a zipper over his lips yet the obvious grin on his face gives it away. 

“can we both agree to always keep an eye on the road now?”

“yes, ma’am… got my other eye on you tho.”

“bachira.”

“you taught me 'bout your past, thinking your future was me”

getting into a relationship wasn’t in itoshi rin’s bucket list. or any list really. never did he think that he’ll be here at 3am in the morning, on his bed, with you, and he’s telling you all about him. from the very first time he held a soccer ball to the day sae left for spain. he confided in you, hiding no side of his self and showing you all and even letting you see through him completely.

“so, this is it?” the air was cold. breaking up on a december night? it almost makes him laugh. he’d fight for it but.. what was the point? this is the ending of a lover story. your love story. if he tries to change the ending, who knows what could happen next? you stay with him out of pity? or you get tired and all goes in a circle once more. he stays silent. not uttering one word and maybe that set you off because you dragged a hand down your face. he observes you for the first time in weeks. you look really tired and if letting this end would make you happy then so be it.

he walks past you and that leaves you baffled. so he’s just leaving, you think to yourself. chest aching and hands itching to reach out, but you don’t. because if he’s walking away without a word, what are the chances he’ll hear you out?

“oh god, i never thought it could end up like this.” rin hears you whisper to yourself as he grabs his coat and makes his way to the door. he bites on his lips, urging the tears brimming his eye to not fall. not now. as he strolls through the park, he mutters to himself. “neither did i.” but you weren’t there to hear him. only the moon knows.

“we're dancing 'round the kitchen in the refrigerator light”

loving mikage reo was unexpected and something you’re grateful for. he’s the best boyfriend one could ever ask for. he fell in love with you at first sight when you took his coffee order at the cafe down the block. the continues to visit the coffee shop with a bouquet of flowers dedicated for you everyday until you give him your number.

cravings at midnight are common. you had them a lot so sneaking out of reo’s arms became something you’re skilled at. tiptoeing towards the fridge, you rummage through every shelf to find something to eat. a yelp escapes you as you felt cold hands slid under your shirt. reo’s laughter breaks your shock, turning to hit him in the chest. that just seems to make him laugh more.

“hi, sweetheart. what are you doing?” he smiles like he did nothing wrong. you scowl at him before turning to rummage through the fridge once again. “i’m hungry. i wanna eat.”

“oh? should we just order then?” reo asks you, pulling out his phone and opening a delivery app.  he was about to click on an item until your hand blocks his phone while you stare him down with a glare. “reo, your fridge is full to the brim. baa-ya even had to push things in the pantry ‘cause there’s no more space!”

“come on, use your inside voice inside the house.” like the smooth man he is, he cuddles you in his arms, swaying the both of you side by side. only to stop when you pinch his side. “ow! what was that for?”

“don’t dance with me when the fridge door is open!”

“but it’s romantic!”

“an overpriced electricity bill isn’t!”

“you’re not even the one paying the bills–ow!”

likes & reblogs are appreciated !

[gayferret420]

Bad Day

this is a birthday present for @skyland2703!!! hope you like it my moot

Today was terrible. The person Javi had to interview today was insufferable, he got stuck in traffic which made him late for work, once he got out of work his car broke down, and now when he was trying to take a walk it started raining. Great. But Javi needed to get home somehow, and walking was good for you. Sure, his clothes were sticking to him in the worst way possible, and the socks inside his shoes were soaked and making him miserable, and he generally just wanted to die a little bit, but it was fine. 

Everything just felt like a lot right now. It felt like way too much. 

Eventually he decided to settle down under a tree and take a break. He sat on the grass, which was also horrible because the grass was wet too and it was poking at his legs through his pants. God, this was the worst. 

“Hey, Javi! How are you?”

Never mind. His day...well, it wasn’t the worst anymore. At least. 

“Hey, Amelia. I’m fine. What about you?” 

She gave Javi a worried look. “Well, I was fine until I saw you sitting under a tree crying.”

“Crying? I’m not crying, It’s the rain!” 

She knelt down next to him. “Javi…your eyes are bloodshot, you’re sniffling, and I can see tears coming from your eyes. Tell me what’s wrong.” She cupped his face and gave him a kiss on the forehead, which made warmth shoot through his entire body.

“It’s stupid.” He brought his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them.

“If it’s making you cry, then it’s not stupid.” 

“But-”

“Javi. Tell me.”

“…Fine.” Javi told his girlfriend about all the shitty things that had happened to him today. He still felt like he was making a mountain out of a molehill. 

“Oh Javi, I’m sorry that all that happened to you. But…I think I know something that could make you feel a little bit better.” Amelia got up and motioned for Javi to follow her.

They walked together for a while, finally stopping at a large hill.

“Why did you bring me here? Don’t get me wrong, the view is great, but I don’t really get how it could make me feel any better. Besides the fact that you’re here.” 

“Just wait.” 

So he did. They waited until the sun started to set. It surprisingly only took a few minutes, how long was Javi walking for?

Not important. What was important was the fact that the sunset was absolutely gorgeous. The pinks and oranges blended with the blues from the day before and made a breathtaking purple, it couldn’t be beaten. It made him forget the horrible day he had entirely.

“It’s pretty, isn’t it?” Amelia asked.

“Yeah, I mean, I don’t think this could get any better.”

“Hey, look at me.”

“Mm? What’s-”

Amelia kissed him. On the lips. For the first time in their relationship. Bad day? What bad day?

“So? Did that make it any better?”

“Y…Yeah. Definitely.” He couldn’t help smiling. “Can we do that again? Soon?”

Amelia chuckled. “Sure. Let’s just enjoy the sunset for now. Wouldn’t wanna miss it.”

They both sat on the grass beneath them, soaking in the beautiful image before them.

[berkmansimagines]

this is me trying

Summary: You're upset with Barry after he causes you to miss something important.

Pairing: Barry Berkman x hitman!wife reader

“...I FUCKING HATE YOU, BARRY!” you scream into your phone before angrily hanging up.

You’re furious with your husband right now. The whole thing started when Barry asked to borrow your car. His car is in the shop and he needed to go on a hit. You were hesitant about letting him use the car because you needed it too. You’ve recently started taking some classes at the City College and one of your midterms was scheduled for this afternoon.

You reluctantly agreed to let Barry borrow your car in the morning because he promised you that the job would be fast. It wasn’t. You waited on Barry for hours. You tried calling and texting him but got no response. You eventually gave up on your husband and got an Uber. Unfortunately, the Uber took forever to pick you up and then you ended up getting stuck in traffic. 

The exam had already started by the time you arrived at the classroom. You were locked out. Your professor warned the class that if anybody was late, they would not be allowed to take the midterm and be automatically given an F. 

Your heart sank when you realized that you wouldn’t be able to take the exam. You studied so hard and it was all for nothing. You walked away from the classroom near tears. Then your sadness quickly turned to anger. You couldn’t help but think that if Barry didn’t take your car, you would have made it to your test on time. As soon as you got outside, you called your husband and left a scathing voicemail.

After you end the call, you scroll through your phone. You’re about to request an Uber to take you home when you notice a bar right across the street. You make a beeline towards it. Once you get inside, you sit right at the bar and order two whiskeys.

You’re about halfway through your second drink when you start feeling bad about the voicemail you left Barry. You were angry. You said some things that you shouldn’t have said. Your words shoot to kill when you’re mad. You have a lot of regrets about that.

“Fuck, I should apologize…” you mutter to yourself.

You check your phone. There’s no call or text from Barry. You shrug it off, deciding to hold off on the apology until you see him in person.

You arrive home several hours later. You got drunk at the bar but your Uber driver took you to In-N-Out on the way home. The food helped sober you up. When you walk through the front door, you find Barry sitting on the couch playing video games. He looks up when he hears you come in.

“Hey,” you greet him nervously.

You try to get a read on his face but he looks almost emotionless. Shit. He definitely listened to your voicemail.

“Hi,” he replies unenthusiastically.

You sit down on the couch, but keep your distance from Barry.

“Can we talk?” you try.

“I thought you said everything you wanted to say in that message you left me,” Barry rolls his eyes.

“I shouldn’t have said those things…” you tell him.

“I didn’t know if you cared if I came back,” Barry says quietly. 

"Of course I cared if you came back. You had my car," you joke in an attempt to lighten the mood. It doesn't work.

Barry rolls his eyes. You bite the bottom of your lip. Regardless of the circumstance, you said some pretty nasty things.

“I’m sorry for what I said. It came from a place of anger and I didn’t mean it. I was just really upset after I got locked out of my midterm and I took it out on you,” you apologize sincerely.

Barry takes a deep breath. He’s quiet for a moment. And then-

“Okay,” Barry nods. 

You let out a sigh of relief.

“Okay,” you nod back.

It’s now Barry’s turn to apologize. You wait for the apology. He doesn't say anything. It’s completely silent. You could cut the tension with a knife. 

“Aren’t you going to apologize to me?” you ask impatiently.

“For what?” Barry gives you a confused look.

Your jaw drops. You rise to your feet.

“You better be joking. I’m sorry about the voicemail but you fucked up too. I missed my midterm because of you! You should’ve called me and told me you weren’t going to make it back in time. If you did that, I could have called the Uber sooner. ”

“I was on a job! You know better than anyone that those things take as long as they're going to take,” Barry sighs.

“That’s still not an excuse for why you couldn’t call or text me,” you reply back coolly, “I was counting on you and you let me down….”

Barry shrugs, shaking his head. Your eyes widen in anger. 

“No! You don’t get to shrug me off like that. You knew how important that midterm was for me. The entire reason I went back to school is because I’m trying to make a better future for myself. I don't want to kill people for the rest of my life. I want to be more than just….this. And it’s like, you didn’t think of me at all when you went off the grid. You're so fucking selfish,” you go off. 

Barry’s face drops. He finally realizes how badly he fucked up. You’re mad at him and you have every right to be. He should’ve just apologized. He stands up and approaches you.

“Y/N-”

He reaches out for your arm but you take a step back and cross your arms protectively against your chest. You glare at him. Don’t touch me. Barry backs off.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry. I should’ve called you,” he tries.

You shake your head. It’s too late for apologies now. You need some time to cool off.

“I studied really hard. I deserved to take that test,” you breathe, and then, “I think I could've aced it, but now we’ll never know…”

You walk away upset. Barry knows well enough not to follow.

[briamichellewrites]

71

Bria was going home the next Saturday morning! Everyone was thrilled! That was just five days away. It had been a long and stressful time. Her oncologist advised her to rest as much as possible to avoid becoming ill again. Hospitals were not good for people with compromised immune systems due to germs. The good news was just what Mike needed. He paid Jason a visit after twenty-four hours of rest to see what he needed to say. Before leaving the house, Dave asked if they should expect him to call from jail.

“I hope not.”

They wished him good luck. He hugged him anxiously. What was so important that he could not tell him on the phone? Was he placed under arrest? No, his parents would have told him about it. When they met with the therapist, he learned his secret. The night after he messed up, he was using cocaine and drinking with a guy at home. The person overdosed. He performed CPR on him while waiting for the ambulance.

He left after seeing him enter the ambulance. He later learned that he had died. Was he placed under arrest? No, because he had sought assistance. He hugged his brother and apologized for him having to witness that. As angry and frustrated as he was with his addiction, he was also compassionate. He wiped the tears that were falling down his cheeks. Were their parents aware? Yes, he informed them during family therapy. How did he first meet him? It happened at a gay nightclub. They hooked up in the bathroom before heading back to his flat to party.

He was taken in for questioning. They determined that he was not legally responsible for the death. Admitting it was part of his treatment plan.

Mike needed a drink. On the way home, he passed a liquor store. Without thinking, he entered the parking lot. He turned off the engine and stepped out. That is when his conscience said, "What the hell are you doing?" He paused and took in his surroundings. Sober. He was sober. A man noticed him looking as if he had seen a ghost. He walked up to him.

“I am an alcoholic. I should not be here.”

"Hey, I understand the feeling. I have been sober for thirty-one years now. Some days are easier than others.”

He responded with a nod. “I apologize for being rude. My name is Mike Shinoda.”

"It is nice to meet you. I am Alice Cooper. Do you want to get some coffee or something?"

“Yes, thank you. That would be great."

Alice listened to him discuss his addiction while they drank coffee. He, his brother, and sister-in-law were all addicts. He was sober, but his younger brother had returned to rehab for the fourth or fifth time. His sister-in-law was hospitalized. He described everything, from her being shot to his husband's PTSD symptoms. They lived with her and her boyfriend.

How long has she stayed sober? She had been sober for five years. They were extremely proud of her. Her boyfriend was preparing to propose. He was the reason she was doing so well. Was she married to his brother? Yes, they were married for approximately three years. Their marriage was based on their shared drug use. They got divorced, which was the best decision for her. When asked about his alcoholism, he explained that he began drinking because he was struggling with his sexuality.

He self-medicated with alcohol and men. What made him decide to get sober?

"My husband. I hurt him in the beginning by prioritizing other men over him. He explained that I needed to learn to love myself before I could love him. He came to visit me while I was in rehab. He waited for me to pull myself together. He is my best friend, and I do not deserve him.

Dave was expecting him at home. He called his phone and left a message after getting voicemail. He returned home just as he was about to get into his car and go looking for him. Normally, he would not think twice about arriving late. Maybe he was stuck in traffic or something. But now his mind was racing with possibilities for the worst-case scenario. He tried not to jump on him, but he had him concerned! Mike apologized for being late and not calling. Where the hell was he?

He admitted to being overwhelmed by what was going on with Jason and Bria. On his way home, he stopped by a liquor store. He almost went inside, but he stopped himself. A guy approached him to see if he was okay. They began discussing his situation. The guy invited him to have coffee with him.

"You almost slipped up?"

“Yeah. I was completely unaware of what I was doing until I got out of the car. I am sorry."

"I am proud of you for stopping yourself. Who was the guy who helped you?"

“Alice Cooper. I am not joking!"

“Alice Cooper the rockstar?”

“Yeah. He enjoys mentoring people going through addiction because he was an alcoholic. I have his personal phone number in case I need to talk to him."

He was so humble that he would never have realized who he was. During their conversation, he shared his early career experience with alcohol and how he became sober. He would been sober for thirty-one years. Dave apologized for jumping on him, but he told him not to because he should have told him where he was. He promised to be mindful of that.

Brad brought Bria a gift. He had looked up wig shops. A salesperson assisted him in selecting the perfect one. He showed the associate a picture of her to assist her in taking the proper measurements. The wig was designed to resemble actual human hair. He remembered that her brown hair had fallen down her back. It was gorgeous, and he knew she adored it. They found one that was an exact match! It was placed in a gift bag for him to take to the hospital.

She absolutely loved it! It came with a cap that kept it in place on her head. He and Jon assisted her in putting it on. They then took her into the bathroom so she could see how she looked in the mirror. Oh, my God! They shared a laugh. She thanked him! He pulled out his phone and took pictures of her to show Mike and Dave when he got home. Did it feel like her own hair? Yes! She brushed her fingers through it.

They led her back to the table and chairs. Her phone was charging right beside her bed. Brad brought it over to her. She received text messages from everyone asking how she was doing. He also brought her iPod touch. Jon inquired about the songs on her playlist.

She turned it on and opened her Apple Music app. She read off her artist list as she scrolled through it. She did have Bon Jovi. He and Brad laughed. Kelly Clarkson, Shania Twain, Coolio, Linkin Park, Tracy Chapman, Ozzy Osbourne, LeAnn Rimes, Kid Rock, Céline Dion, Janis Joplin, Sheryl Crow, and Good Charlotte were also on her list. It was a random collection of songs.

Her father enjoyed classic rock from the 1970s and 1980s, while her mother admired artists such as Elton John. She enjoyed all types of music. Her brothers in law were in Linkin Park. Which instruments did they play? Mike was the main rapper, while Dave was the bassist. He asked about her last name. Was it her maiden name? No, Johnson was her maiden name. Shinoda was her last name. She kept it after her divorce because she did not want to go through the trouble of changing it.

How old was she? She was twenty-seven years old. How long was she married? Three years. That was a young age. She was in agreement. Getting married was an impulsive decision. After a few hours with her, Brad invited him to his house.

Mike and Dave were in the backyard with the dogs, so they decided to join them. They exchanged greetings and introduced themselves to Jon. It was nice to meet them. After a while of running around, they brought the dogs inside. They ran as fast as their legs would allow. When they got inside, they went to their bowls for water, while the humans sat in the living room.

@zoeykaytesmom @feelingsofaithless @alina-dixon