#i got a call from a girl i used to know!!! we were inseparable years ago!!! thought we'd get along!!! but it wasn't so!!!!

[goldwingangell]

cause i loved you then and i loved you now, and i don't know how

[misserabella]

come over

abby anderson x fem! reader

pt2

summary; strangely enough, your number one enemy since kindergarten and captain of the basketball club of your college calls you up one night begging you to come over to her dorm room. after knocking on her door, things will take a turn that you would have never expected.

CW;; +18 content! minors dni!, cursing, dirty talk, nipple play, bullying and fights, teasing, oral sex (r receiving), strap on use (r receiving), abby calls the strap her cock, jealousy, possessiveness, dacryphilia, overstimulation, squirting, spanking, finger fucking, hair pulling, praising, degradation, multiple orgasms… MINORS DNI!!!

Please, under no circumstances, repost my work on any other sites. I do not consent to anyone taking my work and posting it as their own.

You were having a really bad day. Not bad, horrible.

First of all, your alarm didn’t go off for some stupid reason and caused you to 1. getting late to school and 2. getting your teacher to lower your grade just because he’s a goddamn asshole that hates you.

Second of all, you’d forgotten your lunch and your wallet, so you were now starving unable to buy anything to eat (thank god one of your friends had shared with you her sandwich or else you would be dead by now). And third of all…

“And what do we have here?”

Her.

You rolled your eyes, feeling your skin heating up and your insides turning with disgust and anger as you turned around to face the most annoying fucking person you’ve ever met.

“Give it back, Anderson.”

Abigail Anderson, the name that would appear on your worst nightmares, the monster under your bed, the last person you’d ever want to live through the end of the world with... Your enmity had been going strong since kindergarten, when she had picked on you for your looks since day one just because. Then, she started to tell her friends and those around you to not go near you or else they’d catch lice.

She needed to be on top of you all the time; if there was a race on P.E, she’d make you trip with her foot to get you on your knees and win (leaving you all bloody and injured), if there were presentations to be made in front of the whole class she’d crack up jokes to make everyone laugh at you, giving you quite the public anxiety and if you somewhat got to win her in anything (probably at grades) she’d go nuts and get so pissed that she’d make your life impossible for the next few months by trashing your locker, ‘accidentally’ throwing her drinks all over you, telling the teachers that she saw you cheating…

It only got worse when you found your best friend: Ellie Williams. You became inseparable in high school. And she made your life impossible.

You stapled a poster at the university’s ‘news wall’. It was Ellie’s, she was about to go on a tour and had asked you if it would be okay to hang some posters to let everyone know. Through the years, The Fireflies had gained fame and a lot of followers.

“The freak is going on a tour?” she scoffed, raising her eyebrows. “Disgusting. She really thinks she’s gonna become a superstar or some shit…”

You fisted your hands, your heart being squished under the nickname that your friend had had to grow up with just because she liked things the others didn’t.

“Don’t call her that.” you said, your eyes straight into hers.

“ ‘Freak’?” she teased you, swaying away the poster when you tried and take it back. “What do you want me to call her then, hm? Delusional, maybe.” she thought out loud, when she noticed your furious expression, she simply shrugged. “Just stating facts.” the people around you had gathered to listen to your bickering. It was a daily coincidence now, Anderson being always the one looking for trouble. Some of them laughed at her words… Jerks. Just like her.

“You know what, Anderson? Sure, call her whatever you want.” you said, ripping from his hands the poster. “But I assure you, that you’ll never be not an inch of a girl that she is. All that height and still no brains. ” that made the crowd burst out in laughter. You were filled with proudness when you noticed her jaw tightening and her body going stiff. You were no outcast now, you were popular to be honest, and everybody knew the two of you since Anderson was the basketball team captain and you the cheerleader team captain. It was hell on the games, each of you always fighting each other off. But your teammates had grown so accustomed to it that they just laughed at your little fights. “So go ahead and run your mouth, ‘cause I’m sure yours will never get to places hers have never been.” you leaned in. “And hold your tongue, ‘cause Ellie knows how to use hers really well.” you whispered inches away from her face, giving her a wink before stapling the poster to the board and leaving her behind with tightened fists and heated cheeks.

It was a big day for you and your team, and you didn’t have time for play dates.

—

“y/n!” your eyes shone when to your ears the familiar sound of your best friend’s voice ringed.

You turned around, with your pompoms in hand and high ponytail, your college’s cheerleader uniform shining due to the lights that lightened the whole basketball court.

“Els!” you smiled, so bright that almost blinded, running and jumping on your friend’s arms, who easily caught you and squeezed you in a tight hug. “You made it!” you laughed as she twirled you around.

“Of course I made it, it’s your big night after all. Although I still don’t get this basketball and cheering thing…” she left a sweet peck on your cheek. “But look at you all dolled up! Is it for me?” she winked, leaning just the slightest in, enough for her to whisper on your ear.

You laughed, playfully pushing at her chest. “Of course Ellie, you know I’m all yours.” you winked back, making her let out a quick laughter.

“I really need to put a ring on you, Ms. Williams.” she pointed at you as the music that let the public know that the match was about to start started to play through the speakers and she backed off to the stairs to sit and leave you to your cheerleading.

“I’ll be waiting on it, Ms. Williams!” she sent you a flying kiss that only made you giggle and roll your eyes. You loved Ellie, she always found a way to make you laugh and that’s something that you truly appreciated. She was the only one that truly got you.

You turned around to call for your teammates, your smile fading as fast as your eyes bumped against those blue ones that you do well knew at this rate.

Anderson looked at you with such a pissed expression… Water bottle tightly clutched in one of her hands, about to burst. She let it fall to the ground along with the towel that stood on her shoulders when her coach called out for her with his whistle, giving Ellie, who was on the first step on your back a death glare as she ran to the center of the court to shake hands with the other team captain.

What the…

“Girls come on!!” you called for the cheerleaders on your team as you still looked at the stiff body of your incarnated hell. What the fuck is wrong with her?

“Assume positions!”

Not my problem.

You shrugged it off and started to cheer for your team along with the public that had come to watch the match, most of them students from both colleges. And through all of it, you tried and ignore the harsh eyes that bore holes on the back of your neck, even if your skin felt like being on fire.

…

It was late at night in your dorm room, your roommate having left to stay at her girlfriend’s house since it was Friday. You were snacking on some candy and chips as you watched your favorite show, Teen Wolf, along with Ellie, who had sneaked to your bedroom, laying in your bed fully covered and with your pjs on. After the game, which you sadly had lost, you had watched as a very infuriated Abby walked out of the court and the gym, not without giving you and Ellie, who was hugging you and congratulating you for your efforts regardless of the result of the match, a pretty harsh glare that clearly said ‘fuck you two.’

Jeez, you didn’t know what has gotten her so riled up that afternoon but you surely hoped for her to go and drown her sorrows somewhere as quietly as possible and leave you alone.

“Hell yeah!” you cheered to the power couple as they shared their first kiss, almost jumping and throwing all your chips around and on your best friend when Isaac and Allison finally shared their first kiss.

“Ugh. Really Allison?! I was expecting better from you.” the auburn haired guitarist gasped, acting hurt at the ‘betrayal’. She was team Scott. Which was obviously stupid since he now liked Kira.

“What are you talking about?! Scott has moved on, doesn’t she have the right to do so too?” Ellie gave you a side glance as in a ‘no’, but she quickly laughed when you hit her shoulder with a ‘hey!’.

Your attention was completely on the screen when your phone started buzzing on your side table. You took a new bite at your candy as you reached for it, still not focusing on it as you took. the call. It was probably your roommate calling to check in.

“Hello?” you talked into the line, waiting for a few seconds for an answer that never came. You checked the screen, ‘Unknown number’ showing on its center. You furrowed your eyebrows “Hello? Who’s this?” Ellie paused the series and rose to sit up on your bed along with you, mouthing a ‘who’s it?’. You simply shrugged and mouthed back a ‘no idea’. The sudden appearance of a sharp and heavy breathing caught you off ward for a couple of seconds before you rolled your eyes.

“Are you serious?” you huffed, thinking it was a stupid phone call. “We're in college, how about we stop playing Scream and start being more matures?” you said, and just as you were about to hang up, a rather familiar voice croaked out:

“y/n."

You froze, your breath hitching as your brain tried to convince itself that you had heard right “Anderson?” you were in shock for a couple of seconds, Ellie furrowed his eyebrows and looked at you in utter disbelief. When the casual anger grew inside you with just the mention of her name appeared you snapped at her. “Do you know what hour it is… No. Why the fuck are you calling me in first place?” you rolled your eyes. For just a couple of hours that you were enjoying yourself with your best friend, of course she had to come and ruin it. She always does and always will.

She was silent for an instant before her voice breaks out in a whimper that makes your stomach flip.

“Please.”

“W…What?” your eyebrows were knitted together so hard it was painful. Ellie just hits you in the arm, silently asking you to tell her what’s going on. You just swatted her hand away and lift a finger to quiet her.

“Please.” she repeated.

“Are you drunk or something? You should-“ you started, but she was quick to cut you off.

“y/n…” that was something different. The way your name fell from her lips in such need, hunger… “Come over. Please come over. I need you so bad…”

“I-“

“y/n, what is it?” Ellie spoke up, and you could hear the tension from the other part of the line rise.

“Fuck. Is Williams there with you?” Abby affirmed more than asked.

“y/n!” Ellie asked again.

“y/n.” but the voice of Anderson on the other line had you too out of focus. The way you could hear the begging on her tone, the need…

You didn’t know what had gotten over you, but you found yourself quick on your feet to grab your dorm keys.

“Wait for me.”

Ellie stood up as well and watch you hang up and made your way out of your room after putting on a pair of shoes.

“Where are you going?” Ellie inquired, completely and utterly lost. “You’re leaving?”

“I’ll be right back, I promise. I think there’s something wrong with Anderson. You can continue with the serie and use my bed, alright?” you quickly muttered, and when you caught her stepping closer and raising her hand to say something and find out whatever the hell was going on, you closed the door on her face.

You made your way over to her room’s wing, having been there before to parties and so. And before you knew it, you had knocked on her door. You didn’t have to wait a long time before she appeared on its threshold, her normally perfectly combed and braided hair being a mess, shirtless and with only a pair of sweats and a sports bra on. She looked like a mess, with red cheeks, swollen bitten lips, glassed eyes and shaky breathing.

“Anderson, what the hell are you…” a scream almost got ripped out of you at the harsh yank that took place on your arm. Before you knew it you had been pulled inside and smashed against the now closed door of her room, her body towering over yours and her breath caressing your face.

Fuck. You’ve never been this close before.

“You’re driving me insane.” she said, one of her hands cupping your cheek, dark shiny eyes connecting with yours before they’d drift back to your lips. “I’ve been thinking about what you told me all day. Knowing that Williams got to touch you, taste you… Is killing me. And her being in your room? Having you in her arms? Thinking about her just touching you is… Fuck.” you chocked. You didn’t understand. Wasn’t she supposed to hate you? Despise you? Then why…? “I can’t stop imagining her kissing you, holding you…” her thumb pressed over your bottom lip, tugging on it, admiring. “You were supposed to pay attention to me. You were supposed to think about me.” your heart was thumping against your ribs, and you felt like dying when she harshly kissed you. It was fast, and angry. Her tongue was quick to push inside your mouth, your teeth clashing and your body being pulled against her. You whimpered, your hands finding her hair as you pulled her closer. You’d never felt this way. How your whole body seemed to combust, the shaking of your limbs, the thumping of your heart…

But what was going on? ‘Pay attention to her’? ‘Think of her’? What was that supposed to mean? Had Anderson always treat you badly to get your attention? To get under your skin one way or another?

You were burning, so badly that she felt like snow.

“Fuck.” she muttered as she pulled away. “Been dreaming of doing that since the first time you yelled at me.” you whimpered when her warm hands took a harsh hold of your waist, pulling you against her close and tight enough for you to feel her body heat, her hard nipples through her bra.

Her mouth was back on yours, and your whole world was spinning. Her hair on your hands, her gasps against your lips, her pine scent…

“Yeah, that’s right.” she muttered, a little smirk showing in her factions when she noticed your dazed and unfocused eyes. “Focus on me. Just me.” she whispered on your ear before her lips latched to your neck, sucking on your skin hard enough to mark you up. You moaned, her hands sneaking inside your pj’s shirt and slowly making its way upwards, towards your chest.

“Fuck, Anderson.” you gasped when her warm hands took your tits, massaging them and rolling your nipples in between her fingers as she pressed a leg in between your legs, making your aching pussy brush against the lean muscle of her thigh.

“Abby.” she corrected. “It’s Abby for you, baby.”

“Abby.” you moaned when she pushed upwards with her leg, helping you ride it.

“That’s right. But you need to say it a little bit louder, hm? Need to let everybody know that it’s me who you are moaning for.” you whimpered at her words, her large hands leaving your chest to take your hips and pick you up to make her way to her king size bed. She lifted you so easily it was dizzying, the muscles of her arms popping

You felt almost crushed against the duvet when she pinned you down to it underneath her weight. Almost, ‘cause right at that exact moment, you just wished she could be closer, she could be harsher, smush you against the bed and fuck you senseless ‘till you are nothing more than a babbling mess.

“That’s right.” she smirked when you pulled her closer, choked when her hands were once again pulling your top up slowly. “Fuck. You drive me insane.” she muttered when your chest was fully uncovered. “Fucking beautiful.” you moaned when her mouth left wet kisses on your chest. Her tongue circled your nipples as one of her hands made its way to the seam of your pajama pants and panties, which stood completely soaked in arousal.

“Abby.” you cried out when her fingers caressed you from over the lace of your underwear, chuckling at the wetness of them.

“You are so wet for me already, such a good girl…” you almost whimpered, your cheeks blushing at the praise, something that didn’t go unnoticed. “You liked that, hm? Like to be my good little girl?” you nodded, your legs shaking when she finally pushed down your underwear and pjs to touch you. You gasped when her rough and thick fingers pressed against your core, sliding through your folds, pooled in your arousal. “So fucking wet.” she cursed as she circled your clit, making you moan. Her touch was electrifying. “Is all of this for me?” you once again nodded. “I need to hear your pretty voice. Speak up for me, sweetheart.”

“Yes… It’s all for you.” you managed to sputter out.

“Mmh…” she hummed happily with the answer, smirking when you let out a loud moan as she pushed her middle finger inside of you, instantly hitting that spongy spot that could make you come over and over again. “Then I guess that if it’s all for me… I could have a taste. Isn’t that right?” your eyes rolled to the back of your head when you suddenly felt her tongue around your clit at the same time as she thrusted her finger in and out of you, slowly enough to have you gripping at her hair and bucking your hips in search of more.

She complied, starting to eat you out like a woman starved. And she kind of was, having been craving you for years and years… She craved you, needed you so badly that her composure had plummeted once you’ve told her that Ellie had touched you, kissed you, tasted you first…

She wanted you. Wanted you to be solely and completely hers.

“Ah, Abby, shit…” you were so sensitive. More than usually. Was it because Abby was too good at eating you out or because it was Abby who was eating you out?

“Louder, baby. I need you to be louder for me.” she said before going back to you, her tongue lapping up at your juices and adding another finger. Their thickness made you cry out her name loud enough for the whole floor to hear. You just hoped that there was no teacher doing the check-ins that night or you’d be screwed.

“Abby, I’m… I’m gonna…” your grip tightened on her hair.

“You’re gonna come? Gonna come on my face, hm?” she curved her fingers upwards, relentlessly hitting your g spot over and over again, pulling you closer to your orgasm. “Go ahead, come for me. Let me have it.”

She didn’t need to say it twice. With her tongue back circling your clit, you moaned as you came, harsh, on her tongue, her helping you to extend you climax by thrusting in and out her fingers whilst lapping at your release, drinking everything you had to offer in between moans and hums.

When she let go of you, licking her two fingers clean, you were a flustered mess; with your hair sticking everywhere, red cheeks, swollen lips and glossy eyes. And she wasn’t that different from you, with her chin and red puffy lips shiny with your juices, her cheeks were flushed and her hair a beautiful blonde mess that you had created in between tugs and caresses. She looked beautiful, so beautiful that you couldn’t help dragging her towards you to taste yourself off of her lips, one of your hands finding her aching pussy, soaking her panties. She groaned in your mouth, pulling from your hair to part ways.

“Abby…” you cried out, your eyes half-lidded with need, your pussy aching for her.

“What is it, hm?” oh but she already knew… “Haven’t you had enough already? I gave you my fingers and my mouth, is that not enough for you? What a needy slut…” you moaned at her harsh tone and degradation, the contrast with the recent praise making your skin burn and your body cry for her. You needed her so badly… So much that you swore you could die. “Want me to fuck you, hm? Want me to make you cum all over my cock? Have you all brainless as I use you?”

“Yes please Abby, please, I want it.”

“So pretty begging for me, do you want it that bad?” you nodded, squirming under her touch and whimpering when she gave your thigh a harsh slap. “Can’t hear you, beautiful.”

“Yes.” you cried out, loving how harsh she was treating you, loving the idea that she would use you just for her pleasure.

“Then say it. Beg me to fuck you.” another spank.

“Please Abby, I want you to make me cum all over your cock, please, please, please… I need it. I need you.” tears swelled in your eyes as you stuttered.

“Good girl. Wasn’t that hard, was it?” she said with a smirk, quickly shoving his sweats and underwear down her thighs to discard them aside and reach out for her drawers, pulling out her strap. You almost choked at the size. You couldn’t take that.

It was huge. So thick and large that you knew that she’d tear you apart, stretch you out so good that would leave you sobbing and drooling against her pillow as she fucked into you over and over again.

“What? Bigger than William’s?” she teased you as she towered over you, strapping it to her waist. You would have answered if you weren’t too focused on the pink of its head and on the veins of its sides. On her pussy too. “You’re staring, pretty girl.” you blushed, looking away and into her eyes.

“Shut the fuck up and fuck me, Abby.” you snapped, and she groaned, once again pinning you underneath her and kissing you feverishly. You parted your legs for her to position herself in between them.

“There it is. That fucking mouth of yours. How about I fuck the attitude out of you, hm?” you gasped on her mouth when you felt the head of the strap play with your cunt, slowly dragging up and down in between your slicked folds to lube it up, teasing you at your entrance, pushing just the slightest against it. You were so fucking wet… More than you had ever been before.

“Fuck Abby, please…” you whimpered, your hips thrusting against the tip of her cock. You needed it inside.

Your nails found her back as she finally, after hearing your pleads and begging, aligned herself and started to push the tip of her cock inside, leaving you breathless at the stretch.

“Shhh, it’s okay.” she hushed you as you whimpered with every inch. “You are gonna do good for me, isn't that right baby? You are gonna take it, gonna take my cock and cum on it over and over again, right?” you nodded, sinking your nails deeper in her skin, deep enough to make her bleed. But Abby didn’t care, ‘cause she was finally making you hers, and you were so goddamn tight she was losing her mind. She couldn’t even pull backwards at the clenching of your walls.

You were crying of pleasure and due to the overwhelming sensation of her huge cock when she finally had settled herself fully inside, the tip reaching places you’d never dreamed of, the girth stretching your walls so good it was almost painful. Almost.

"Fuck. Look at you. Already crying and I haven't begun to fuck you yet.” you moaned when she started to slowly fuck into you, so deep that you were going crazy. You needed more, so much more. “Shit, you’re so fucking wet.”

“More. Please Abby, more.” you called out for her, your whimpers filling the room more and more as she started to move faster and faster.

“Yeah, that’s right. Fucking take it.” she groaned, lost on how good you felt. She never wanted to leave. Never wanted to stop feeling you this close. “Such a good girl.”

You moaned, your eyes turning white at the pleasure. This was like nothing you had experienced before.

“Tell me, did Williams fucked you this good, huh?” she asked, taking your cheeks with her right hand as she rolled your clit with her left to make you look at her. “Did she make you drool? Made you cry?”

You shook your head, but she wasn’t happy with that.

“Say it. Say that no one’s has fucked you like me. Say it, baby. Use that pretty mouth of yours.”

“No one has ever… ever fucked me like you.” you somehow achieved to say in between moans and gasps.

“That’s right. Look at you, your pussy is taking me so good… Sucking me in as if you don’t want me to leave.”

Suddenly you were in all fours, your chest against the mattress as she pounded inside of you harder and harder, so hard that you could feel her in your cervix, hitting your sweet spot over and over again.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck…” you cried out, drooling on her pillow, tears spilling due to how good she was making you feel.

Her hands found your hips, pulling you against her hips with every hard thrust, leaving you breathless.

You were a babbling and moaning mess, incapable to form any words, even her name.

“Look at you, so cock drunk you can’t even speak.” she said, and moaned when the strap rubbed perfectly her puffy clit. “Such a slut.” you whimpered when she gave you a harsh slap on your ass, her eyes focusing on how her dick disappeared in and out of your pussy, which now seemed to be molding around her and just her.

“Abby…” you dragged the ‘y’ as she sped up, fucking you brainless, calling her name over and over again.

She could feel the way you started to clench around the silicone. The wet noises of your juices and her thrusts filled the room with your high pitched moans. You were close. So fucking close…

“Abby, I’m gonna cum… I’m gonna…” your voice was so fucked up due to your screams that you swore you’d have a sore throat tomorrow morning, but you didn’t care.

“That’s alright sweetheart. Why don’t you come all over my dick, hm? Let me see you fall apart.” and you did. You came so hard you saw stars, your ears ringing as you squirted all over her bed sheets. “Fuck, good girl. Good. fucking. girl.” she groaned at the sight of your cunt gushing around her whole cock.

You were an incoherent mess as you came over and over again, drooling on her pillow and throwing her over the edge with a ��fuck’.

And maybe and just maybe, you stopped hating Abby that much from now on.

‘Cause we all know what they say… From hatred to love there is only one step.

-

a/n; i hoped y’all liked this college abby!! love you!!!!🩵

REPOSTS AND COMMENTS ARE VERY MUCH APPRECIATED!<33333

[yexthiccxa]

The Angel With Horns Pt. 1

summary: you accept a teaching position at jujutsu high where you get to work with your childhood crush, suguru geto. unfortunately, that means you'll also have to work with your childhood nemesis, satoru gojo. are you going to rekindle new flames or potentially make new ones?

wordcount: 7.3k 🙃 (this is pt. 1 and it's four chapters long)

c/w: gojo/fem!reader, geto/fem!reader, gojo/oc, geto/oc, modern!au, teacher!au, smut, fluff & smut, some plot, plot what plot, flashbacks, timeskip, asshole!gojo, flirty!gojo, cocky!gojo, soft!geto, cousin!shoko, mutual pining, teasing, flirting, playful banter, friends to lovers, enemies to lovers, sensual tension, sexual tension, pet names (angel), dry humping, fingering, oral, fantasizing, multiple orgasms, inappropriate use of cursed energy, inappropriate use of cursed techniques

a/n: eeeep. this is my first fanfic so feedback is welcome 🥺it’s a first person pov where the unnamed oc is meant to be the reader! Currently working on Part 2!

edit: just posted this part on ao3 if you'd rather read it there!

✦✧✸✧✦ 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT ✦✧✸✧✦

Chapter 1: Reunited

It’s clear as day but my mind is fuzzy. There are thousands of thoughts surging through me, but all I can focus on is the pleasure filling my body. For as long as I’ve known him, I’ve always wondered if this day would ever come. My hips are pinned against his counter. Arms stretching wide while my fingers grip his sink. My neck rolls back as the rays of light blind me from his window. 

In my head, I’ve spent countless hours wondering how it feels to have his body pressed against mine. Or how his breath hovers on my neck as he pulls me closer. His scent is undeniably sweet, but the way he handles me tells me that he’s everything but that.

“I always thought you were a good girl,” he growls in my ear, kissing his way down to my neck like it was never his to claim. “I never expected you to prove me wrong.”

I imagined how his kisses would consume me, how his touch would paralyze me, and how his moans would ignite me. But in all these years, I never imagined this entire fantasy would be with someone else instead.

✦✧✸✧✦

TWO WEEKS AGO

The clouds begin to subside as I walk through the familiar gates of Jujutsu High. The droplets of rain fade away and a strange mix of emotions hit my core. Today marks the beginning of my journey as a teacher here, but I can't stop myself from feeling a pang of anxiety. Amid the unease, there’s still a sense of comfort in returning to a place I once called home.

My footsteps echo softly on the hallway tiles as I make my way to room 3-A for orientation. The memories of my time as a student creep into my thoughts. It’s changed in many ways, but I find solace in knowing that there are still a few people here that I can lean on.

When I moved back to Tokyo and got the teaching position, Shoko mentioned that Suguru taught here as well. Memories of him invaded my thoughts. We were practically inseparable during our high school years, largely due to my close bond with Shoko. Wherever she was, I was sure to follow—our Ieiri blood may tell us we’re cousins, but I always thought of her as my sister. Her friends were always fun to be around. However, they constantly got into situations that always put me on edge. Shoko has always been such a free spirit, and while I adore her, I know her comfort zone far surpasses my own. Despite my lack of participation in their wild adventures, I surprisingly never felt left out or lonely.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go? Finding curses in abandoned hospitals sounds way cooler than studying curses… in a book,” I muttered to Suguru as I gestured to my pile of textbooks.

“How many times do we have to go over this? I’d rather practice my curse techniques here instead.” He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and lowered his face towards mine—his breath tickling my ear.

“Plus, taking care of you is a hell of a lot better than taking care of everyone else,” he chuckled.

“Who said you needed to take care of me?” I protested. He remained close, and I felt his mouth curve.

“I never said I needed to. I want to take care of you,” he whispered. A secret for only my ears to hear.

Throughout the years, I grew to love his playful laughter. It was soft, tinged with warmth and sincerity—though it always seemed to trail his jokes that slightly missed the mark. And his touch, though never sensual, always felt protective—like a wolf looking after its pack. The more I learned how sweet Suguru was, the deeper I fell in love. For years my guarded soul harbored this secret, and even if the world was ending, I swore to myself that I would never tell a soul. The "what ifs" often danced through my thoughts, but ignorant bliss always outweighed the risk of potential heartbreak.

My thoughts come to a halt as I turn a corner, and suddenly, I'm face-to-face with a towering presence. My breath catches, and my eyes instinctively trail up the contours of his strong frame. The world around me blurs for a moment, and my heart quickens. But before I can fully process the shock, a familiar voice calls out to me.

"Hey, there’s my girl! Did you realize the world wasn’t as great without me?" Suguru teases, his voice bringing back years of memories.

"Suguru!" I exclaim, a surge of excitement makes me toss my arms around him. My words tumble out eagerly, "If I was your girl, I probably would’ve never left." I laugh, though my heart races as curiosity causes his brow to rise. “I’m just kidding. Everything was great, but I’m glad to be back though." It may not have been the best save, but it’ll work for now.

My arms tighten ever so slightly, and I’m compelled to study him. His shoulders are still broad, yet somehow, they seem larger than I remember. His hair has grown longer, though he still keeps it partially tied. The chiseled contours of his jaw feel like steel against my skin, but his arms around waist are gentle and comforting. I notice that the morning gloom has officially cleared, because his beauty is bathed in sunlight. As we break away from our hug, his dark eyes meet mine with recognition and warmth, as if our time apart has only deepened our connection.

"Well, I’m glad it was good. I’ve missed you." he rumbles, his voice resonating like a soothing melody.

"Likewise," I reply with a warm grin, feeling a rush of nostalgia. "Will you be at orientation today?"

He explains that he has to help Yaga with some setup throughout the morning. I try not to let my smile drop, but he's quick to notice. Of course he notices, it's Suguru. Before I can even process my thoughts, he adds, "I have the same lunch break as everyone else though, let's catch up then? We can meet in the courtyard."

A surge of excitement washes over me, and I nod eagerly. "Sounds perfect," I reply. Feeling a newfound sense of confidence, I continue on my way to the orientation room. 

“I’ve missed you." his voice echoes through my mind. For a moment, I can't help but wonder, was he thinking about me the whole time I was gone? Why did he call me his girl? Does that mean he had feelings for me? No—stop, that can’t be. If he had feelings for me, he would've said something, right? But maybe that’s just wishful thinking.

My stomach begins to flutter as a seed of hope is planted into my heart. The slightest possibility of Suguru's interest sends me to the moon. I know I’m not the same girl I was when we last saw each other. So maybe, just maybe, this is a sign.

As I head towards the room, my steps feel lighter than they've been in a long time. For once in my life, I can finally hope for something more. I finally believe that I…my heart sinks as I reach the door. 

Blocking my path is a figure I desperately hoped to avoid—the infamous Satoru Gojo.

Chapter 2: Repulsive

Much like Suguru, Satoru’s build overpowers me. His arms rest on the edge of the doorframe and I can see the contours of his bicep peek through his shirt. I take in a sharp inhale and reluctantly step forward. Satoru will not, I repeat, not get the better of me today. I hesitate for a moment, locking my eyes with his.

He peeks out from the edge of his sunglasses, and the corners of his lips begin to curl. I watch as pieces of his platinum hair barely brush the top of his rims, while others just fall short of his eyes. It’s been years, but those striking pools of blue remain etched in my memory. Swirls of azure, navy and cobalt fill my vision, but I stop myself before my gaze begins to linger.

I attempt to slip past him but find myself with no clear escape. As I contemplate my next move, I mutter a greeting through gritted teeth, "Satoru."

His smirk grows into the devilish grin that haunted my past. "Hey there, Angel,” he purrs. “No hello? Or how have you been?" His tone takes on a playful note, laced with a hint of something else—something I can't quite decipher.

I try my best to let the moment pass, but I’ve let this go on for far too long. I’m done ignoring his comments. “You know I have a real name right?” I bite back.

“But why switch it up now? You’ve always been my little angel,” he teases mockingly. 

“And you’ve always been a pain in my ass,” I reply, my stare unwavering.

“She fights back,” his brow rises in shock. “I like this new version of you. Keep it up.” His grip on the doorframe loosens and he turns to make his way into the room. 

I let out a deep sigh, feeling the tension of my grip escape through my fingers. As I regain focus, I notice Satoru has turned back, his face mere inches from my ear. His voice is smooth, like silk across my skin as he whispers, “I can be a pain in a lot of other places, but I promise it’ll feel good.” 

My eyes widen as my pupils darken. My mouth runs dry as he chuckles his way to the edge of the room.

Memories of my high school days with Satoru flood back into my mind. His words cut through me, but in a way more akin to pleasure than pain. A mix of emotions overwhelm me, but I ultimately scowl at the sight of him. While Shoko and Suguru have helped me blossom, Satoru has always been the thorn in my side.

“Come on Suguru, are you really going to stay with her again?” Satoru asked.

“It’s okay, just go without me. I’ll go with you next time,” Suguru replies. His arm raises to scratch the back of his head.

This is the last festival of the season; there won't be another chance. “Please just go. I’ll be fi—,” I uttered.

“Well, enjoy your time with the little angel,” Satoru calls out as he continues walking away.

He makes his way out of our view, and I turn to Suguru, “Why do you even call him your best friend? He’s kind of a dick.”

Suguru laughs. “When you go through some of the stuff that we have, you’ll see that there’s a bond that goes deeper than blood. He’s a bit rough around the edges, but it’s not an excuse. Don’t worry. I can talk to him.”

I can’t stop myself from smiling with adoration.

I quickly find an empty seat in the orientation room, my mind still buzzing. The comfort and familiarity of the school are now tainted by the presence of someone I had hoped to forget. It was stupid of me to think Suguru and Satoru would drift apart after all these years. As I gather up my resolve to remain close with Suguru, I accept that their connection means my path with Satoru will cross more often than I would like.

✦✧✸✧✦

A full morning of orientation reduces my brain to mush. The anticipation builds and all I can pay attention to is the clock ticking away. Yaga drones on about teamwork, collaboration, and trust – unsurprising, considering his history mentoring Suguru and Satoru. If he survived that, I’m sure being the principal is a piece of cake.

As the clock finally strikes noon, I gather my belongings and head for the door.

“Ms. Ieiri—one moment please,” Yaga calls to me, stopping in my tracks. He assembles the group of new hires and hands each one a folded letter. “This is for the afternoon sessions. On this sheet you’ll find…”

His words trail off and I find myself glancing at the clock again, hoping that Suguru hasn’t been waiting too long. Once we’re dismissed, I rush towards the courtyard.

While my legs carry me on autopilot through the halls, I take a moment to examine the letter. The paper feels coarse, the creases are weighted with importance, yet the ink is delicately placed. The overwhelming amount of information makes it clear that I'll have to review it once lunch is over. I scan the letter to find main items scheduled for the afternoon:

1pm: Mentor Session (Room 2-C)

2pm: Lesson Planning (Room 1-B)

3pm: Team Review (Room 1-B)

Seems simple enough. I approach the stairs leading to the courtyard, when my eyes catch the small section at the end of the letter:

Mentor Assignment: …

As I hurry, I fail to notice the uneven step at the halfway mark. My foot catches the edge and suddenly, I’m airborne. I feel the letter escape my fingertips. My heart leaps into my throat and the world starts to blur.

I reach for the railing, but my grasp barely holds. In the following moments, I find myself colliding with a figure. His hold is strong, bringing me comfort. I feel his fingers slowly cup my arms—they’re soft, tender, holding me with care. 

“Easy there,” he rumbles. “I got you,” his voice is low and radiates through my core. Suguru’s eyes lock onto mine and I feel the heat beginning to smolder. “I got you.” His words bounce through my head.

“Suguru. Sorry… I—” The words are impossible to make out.

“Don’t apologize,” Suguru smiles. “I like having you in my arms.” He adds a playful wink sending butterflies through my chest.

I hold his gaze and my body melts into his. Suguru and I have been close for years, but this time, it feels altered, deeper. It feels like the intensity of our connection is seeking something beyond friendship. We’re inches from each other and I wonder if he can hear my thoughts or feel my heart beat out of my chest. Time slows as I marvel at his smile. I let my mind wander just for a moment…

Suguru lowers, barely touching his lips against mine. He starts soft, planting kisses down my neck as he caresses my cheek. His touch trails to the rest of my body and delight surges within me. It's gentle, but I crave more. He bites my lip before slowly letting his tongue make his way inside my mouth.

Passion builds within me as one hand grips my hair and the other grabs my waist. When his fingers gently graze the small of my back, I writhe with pleasure, hoping he can’t feel the squeeze between my thighs. His taste is intoxicating—sending me into a fever that I can’t seem to break. 

I close my eyes and let his mouth take me.

“I’ve been waiting for you…” he breaks away to tell me. His voice is on the brink of losing control. “...for a very long ti—”

“Hello? Are you okay?” Suguru asks. My focus immediately returns. “I’ve been waiting for you, so I was heading back inside to make sure you were doing alright.”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Yaga needed to give us this letter and—oh fuck. My letter.” 

He senses my worry and swoops me up in one solid motion, but I feel too weak to stand.

I turn to see that my letter has found its way in a puddle pooling at the edge of the steps. I rush down to grab it, but it’s already too late. While I can make out certain areas, the majority of it has smeared away. I bring my gaze towards bottom in hopes of making out some of the letters:

M..nt…. ….gnment: S…..u G…o

I pause—Suguru Geto. A knot hits my stomach and I’m waiting to identify whether this feeling is anxiety or joy.

I look up from the letter expectantly. “Suguru, my mentor… is this right?” I ask.

“Yeah, it is! It’s nice being paired with someone you know. It’ll be just like old times.” His words are the only confirmation I need.

✦✧✸✧✦

Although the years have passed, it feels like Suguru and I have never skipped a beat. I miss the way he talks, the way he laughs, the way a strand of hair always manages to fall even when it’s tied. I could spend hours looking into his eyes and hearing all of his adventures and how he’s mastered his curse techniques. 

The minutes go on and the end of our lunch hour approaches. Suguru frowns as he glances at his watch, and offers an apologetic smile. "I have to head out a bit early. Yaga needs some help before the mentor sessions start," he explains.

I nod understandingly, though I can't help but feel disappointed. "No problem, I’ll see you in a bit?"

He grins, those familiar eyes twinkling with warmth. "Definitely, I’ll see you later!" He gives me a hug and we part ways.

With a sway in my step, I find myself standing before the door of 2-C—but it’s locked. I scan the hallway to see if anyone can help, but there’s no one in sight. I grab my phone to text Suguru for help, but fate has other plans.

Before I can send the message, a familiar presence creeps up behind me. The weight of his aura envelops me. His body feels warm, yet somehow my blood runs cold. With a key in hand, he moves to unlock the door.

A gasp escapes my lips, and I feel the tension build around us. My heart races as I hear a voice, a soft whisper that ignites my soul.

"Hey there, angel," the voice purrs. "Were you looking for me?"

I let out a deep breath to release the fury that boiled inside of me. “As a matter of fact, no. I wasn’t looking for you… Satoru.”

Chapter 3: Reinforcements

It takes me a second, but it finally registers. The letter didn’t actually say Suguru Geto. It was supposed to say Satoru Gojo. Suguru’s voice rings though my head:

“Suguru, my mentor… is this right?” I try to recall. I guess I didn’t explicitly mention a name.

“Yeah, it is!” Damn it, why didn’t I say his name?

“It’s nice being paired with someone you know.” My body feels heavy as my soul fills with dread.

“It’ll be just like old times.” The world begins to spin around me.

I walk through the door without looking at Satoru and head straight for the windows on the other side of the room. The room itself is quite small, just large enough to fit a blackboard, a full teacher’s desk, and three smaller desks for the students. There’s a bit of extra room to spare, but none of it is enough to keep me away from Satoru.

In the reflection of the window, Satoru props himself against the larger desk, his long arms draped behind him. His smirk tells me he's completely at ease, as if he enjoys torturing me this way. “Not who you were expecting?”

I hold my response and continue staring out the window. I suspect he can read my discomfort.

His footsteps are quiet, but I feel them reverberate behind me. The air from the window feels cool, but it fades when his body radiates against mine. He leans down, bringing his hands around my sides. As he places them on the window sill, I can feel his face inch closer to mine. He’s too close for comfort but I can’t bring myself to push him away.

“With a bit more time, angel, you’ll see that I’m full of surprises.” I can feel the rumble in his throat as he speaks. “That is…if you’re willing to find out.”

My face turns hot and my thighs tighten. I may hate Satoru, but there’s something about his charm that feels irresistible. After years of dealing with him, I thought I’d get used to it. But this doesn’t feel like the same Satoru I used to know.

His arms are still placed on either side of me, but I swat him away, “Don’t you have better things to do than to tease me?” My brow rises. “Maybe… actually mentoring me?”

He lifts his arms in defense, “Hey angel, sorry if I’m coming on a little strong. I’m just having some fun.” He nudges my arm, and the force leaves me unsteady. “For old times’ sake.”

I roll my eyes and take a seat at one of the smaller desks.

“Plus, I’m not big on mentoring,” he adds. “Yaga has me doing this because I owe him for saving my ass on the last mission. Luckily he assigned me to you, and we both know you’re more than capable of doing this job without my help. It’s always been like that.”

“Oh how sweet. Is this your way of complimenting me?” I tease. He wasn’t wrong, but I wasn’t going to give in that easily.

“What do you mean? I always give you compliments.”

“Calling me angel doesn’t count,” I sneer.

“Would you like me to call you princess instead?” He curled into a self-assured smile.

I blush, trying to bite back a chuckle. I lied, this is the same old Satoru. “So are you going to keep making up names, or are you actually going to teach me something?”

He brings himself close, his face stopping just short of mine. “I can teach you a lot of things, angel.”

I let out a sigh, “I’m serious, Satoru.”

“Fine, if you insist.” My curiosity is piqued as he props himself up and heads for the blackboard. 

“Lesson number one: If you ever want me, don’t want me,” he smirked.

I drop my shoulders and let out a sigh, but he continues.

“I’m serious! Lesson number two: If you ever need me…”

I finish his sentence, “Don’t need you?” His smile confirms my thoughts. “What’s number 3, Gojo-senpai?” My eyes plead as I pout in an attempt to mock him.

He seems uneasy. “Don’t do that,” he quickly snaps back, and I straighten up. “And now, lesson number three, the most important one: If you ever need my help, learn how to help yourself first.”

With a hint of sarcasm, I reply, “Wow, what a wonderful lesson. I’ve learned so much.” I gather my belongings and prepare to leave. “I think I'll just ask Yaga to assign me to someone else.”

He steps closer, blocking my path before I can fully rise from my seat. "No, wait. Don't do that,” he implores, his gaze earnest. “Can you stick it out for a little while? Just until this mentorship period ends. I need to get through these two weeks so Yaga won't make me do this again next year.”

I force my way up and scoff in his face, “Why on earth would I do that? What the hell have you done in these last few hours or even the last ten years that would make me put in a good word for you?” My volume increases. “You constantly tease me, you’ve never helped me, and—”

“I can hook you up with Suguru,” he murmurs.

“Excuse me?” My voice remains elevated from the anger.

“I can hook you up with Suguru,” he repeats firmly.

“Oh,” I pause as my voice settles. “Why would you do that?”

“For someone so smart, you ask the silliest things. It’s obvious you like him, angel.” 

My cheeks heat, feeling exposed and vulnerable under his penetrating gaze.

“It’s been obvious…for years—at least to me,” his voice softens. "And I promise, if you put in a good word for me, I'll help you with Suguru. No tricks, no games. Do we have a deal?" He extends his hand, waiting for my response.

This deal seems too good to be true. I try to figure out what the catch is, but nothing comes to mind. Unlike before, his gaze feels genuine and his smile seems sincere. I take a deep breath, preparing for a leap of faith. For the first time in my life, I guess I’m going to have to trust Satoru.

I reach for his hand, allowing a confident smile to grace my lips. “Deal.”

✦✧✸✧✦

Although this is not how I pictured my first couple of weeks back in Tokyo, this alliance isn’t as terrible as I thought. At the end of our work days, Satoru and I hang back in Room 2-C for our “mentoring” sessions. We spend 1% of the sessions on actual work, and the other 99% on dating. I tell him that it’s been a while since I’ve dated, and Satoru jumps at the opportunity to refresh me on the art of flirting.

 "Alright angel—you’ve known Suguru for a while, but I’m guessing like you only ever interact with him as a friend. Try starting…” he picks up his hand to graze the side of my arm, fingers lightly dragging towards my wrist.  “...with light touches. Make sure you maintain eye contact and smile genuinely." His voice is velvet and slow.

A shiver runs through me, and my mouth goes dry. I clear my throat. "Light touches, like this?" I laugh hesitantly. I try to mimic his advice, but it’s nowhere near as gentle as his.

Satoru chuckles. "Close, but you’re too tense. Just relax a little bit."

I soften my touch and continue to brush my fingers up his arm. As I slowly pull him towards me, our eyes lock and I’m immediately mesmerized. There’s a flutter in my core and it turns into desire. There’s an ache between my thighs, and moisture begins to form.

“That’s it,” he purrs as he leans towards me. “Just like that.” The pull of his voice is a magnet that continues to bring me closer. My heart races while the quickness in my breath trails slowly behind.

I close my eyes and let my cravings take control.

Satoru rests his thumb on the edge of my lip while the rest curl under my chin. He tilts my head and slowly whispers, “And that is exactly what you should do…” His voice perks back up to his normal tone. “...when you’re flirting with Suguru,” he smiles.

I shoot my eyes open and straighten up. What the hell was I thinking? Was I seriously trying to kiss Satoru? I mean, it wouldn’t be so bad, would it? Wait…no, stop that. Something must be wrong, my wires are completely crossed. I shake it off to rid myself of the residual shame.

Shoko braided my hair like she’s done a million times before. “Hey, who do you think is cuter, Suguru or Satoru?” she posed out of curiosity.

“Hmm, that’s so hard. You know they're both hot.” I laughed. “If we’re going purely off of looks, probably Satoru. Sometimes I hate him, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t cute. I think it’s the eyes.” 

“Yeah,” she replies with a hint of dejection in her voice. “I think so too.” I knew what was coming, but I could tell she had trouble getting it out. “Would you be mad if I asked him out?”

I pulled away for just a moment, “Oh my god, go ahead! Don’t worry about me. Suguru is still cute, plus he’s way nicer to me anyways.”

She paused for a moment, then threw her arms into a hug, “You’re the best.”

I smiled back and returned her embrace. “Okay, now finish doing my hair.”

✦✧✸✧✦

During these last two weeks the only times I see Suguru are during our lunch breaks. His schedule is hectic, but I can see that he makes the time for me—even though I know he doesn’t have any. I use these moments to practice some of the things I’ve learned from Satoru. Light touch, eye contact, genuine smiles.

I’ve touched Suguru’s arm, stared into his eyes, and laughed at his jokes many times before, but it was never like this. This time, all of my actions are bold, assertive, and confident. It’s no surprise that Satoru is a master of charm, but I didn’t expect him to be a decent teacher as well. Come Monday, he’ll be happy to know that Yaga will get glowing reviews for his mentorship.

For today’s lunch, Suguru and I are sitting on the courtyard steps, inches away from where he caught me just two weeks before. He has a look on his face that I haven’t seen before. I can tell something is on his mind by the way his brow furrows and his smile drops.

“Hey, what’s up?” I ask.

“I was—” he pauses, then retracts. “Nevermind, it’s nothing.”

“Come on, Suguru. You can tell me,” I place my hand on top of his.

He smiles, and I can tell my assurance has calmed him down. “I just found out that I’m leaving for a mission next week, and I won’t be back for a few days.”

“Oh,” I reply, a pang of disappointment lingers in my tone.

“I was wondering…” he starts. “Did you maybe want to hang out or something before I leave?” A nervous grin crosses his face before he adds, “Like outside of work?”

I perk up at his proposal. “Of course! I would love that. When were you thinking?”

“I know it’s last minute, but maybe… tomorrow night? It’s okay if you’re bu—”

Cut him off before he has the chance to ramble. I reply with, “I would love to.”

Our lunch continues and the conversation shifts between current events, life updates and playful banter. I learn that Suguru still prefers staying in over going out, he’s got a new obsession with cooking, and his hair care routine is a lot more involved than I thought. As he speaks, I can’t help but admire him and the person he’s become.

When we prepare to part ways, Suguru confirms our plans for the weekend, “So, I’ll see you tomorrow? Meet at my place around 7?” Grinning as he inputs his address into my phone.

“I’ll see you there,” I return a smile and hug him before I leave. The feeling of his touch is perfect.

Chapter 4: Reckless

The workday ends and I make my way to the usual room for my last mentoring session with Satoru. As I walk in, he notices the stupid grin plastered on my face. “You look a little chipper today, angel. What’s up? Excited that you’re no longer forced to spend with me?”

“Well, yes,” I laugh. “But also… Suguru asked me to hang out tomorrow tonight. I’m going to meet him at his place,” I fight to contain my excitement.

Satoru’s brow lifts with intrigue, “If you wanted an invite to come over, you could’ve just asked me.”

Confusion clouds my brain. ���Excuse me?” I ask.

“He didn’t tell you we were roommates?”

The clouds dissipate when I realize what’s going on. “No he didn’t. I guess it makes sense though.” The thought of Satoru joining in on our date fills me with unease. “You won’t be there right?” I clarify.

“You can relax, I’m meeting up with someone too. No need to worry about me barging in on whatever “activities” you two plan on doing,” air quoting as he takes a seat at the desk in front.

“Satoru, stop. You don’t even know if that’s gonna happen,” I argue.

“You’ve spent ten years drooling over this man, and you finally get a chance to spend some time with him in his apartment…alone.” he starts. “I don’t know about you, angel, but that sounds like a recipe for sex to me.” He leans back towards the blackboard and places his arms behind his head. A smug look sweeps his face.

“Well, yeah I guess… but it’s more so…” I hesitate, struggling to find the words to say. The thought of Suguru and I being intimate has always crossed my mind, but I can't believe it might actually happen.

“Oh I get it… There’s no reason to be nervous. Sex is sex,” he interjects. “Plus, if he’s the one who initiated the date, I’m sure he’ll enjoy whatever happens, sex or no sex.”

He makes a good point, but I still feel unsure. Before I have the chance to stop myself, I blurt out, “Do you know what he’s into…like when it comes to sex? Do guys even talk about that stuff to each other?” The regret immediately slips through my lips.

Satoru gets up from his seat and brings his hands to my shoulders—a gesture of comfort I’ve never seen from him before. “He’s my best friend, I know everything about him,” he assures me. “Trust me, you’ll be fine.”

“Can you just tell me? Please?” I playfully beg, placing my hands on top of his.

Something about my question changes his demeanor, like he’s been waiting for it all along. The air shifts and suddenly I feel a rush of heat. Satoru drops one of his hands while the other drags across my chest. He begins to circle me, walking slowly, like a lion with its prey. In a situation like this, his towering presence would normally intimidate me, but something this feels different. I'm not feeling fear; instead I feel secure, fascinated, and curious about what lies ahead.

He makes his way behind me and I can feel him lower his head towards mine. “I can tell you…” he whispers, grabbing my waist and pulling me closer. “But do you want me to show you instead?” His words send shivers to my spine. 

He retrieves something from his pocket and places it into my hand. It’s a long piece of fabric, similar to the one he uses to wrap his eyes. My mind spins—stuck between the logic in my head and the cravings of my body. I hesitate for a moment, but the weight of my desire defeats me. “Yes. Please,” I say softly, as I wrap the cloth around my eyes.

“Perfect.” He ties the back securely, and I feel his touch tilt my head toward him.

I let out a breath and part my lips. Our lips touch, locking just for a moment before he briefly pulls away.

“I think for your benefit, and definitely mine, I’m going to keep my limitless on. That way it’s purely informational and you won’t feel a thing,” he says.

And just like that, an invisible barrier forms between us. While his touch is subdued, I still feel the heat hovering between us. The closer I try to get to him, the more I feel his body vibrate against mine—like magnets trying to repel. Damn it, Satoru. He might not feel a thing, but I… I still feel everything.

In my mind, I do my best to recall every part of Suguru from memory. I try seeing his face and emulating his touch. As the pieces of Suguru form, a clear image of him floods my brain.

I can feel his touch as Satoru moves up from my waist and beneath the hem of my shirt. He continues up to cup my breast and I can sense his kisses on my neck. They’re soft and muted, but the sensation still gives me chills. His breath is hot as his mouth works his way up to nibble my ear. I can feel his throat rumble when Satoru continues his lesson, “Do you want to know what Suguru is like?”

I nod. In my mind, Suguru’s dark eyes ease their way shut as he takes in my scent. His strands of hair brush against my shoulder as he continues to plant kisses down my neck.  

“Suguru is a lover—always takes care of his women,” Satoru purrs as he rubs his thumb over my breast. The friction against my nipple sends a jolt of euphoria through my chest. “Do you want to see how he’ll take care of you?” he asks.

My body tenses and I feel a rush of liquid between my thighs. I roll my head back onto his shoulder and hum with pleasure. My breath is labored, I can barely speak. “Show me,” I manage to let out.

“Well to start, he’d make sure your lips never go hungry.” Satoru slowly turns me around while his kisses move to my lips. His lips are soft, smooth as he takes me in.

The intensity rises as his kisses become needy. Using his hands to grip my ass, he leans me on the edge of the desk behind me. Shock fills my body and I can feel his tongue finding its way inside my mouth. Waves of his cursed energy flow through me. It’s powerful—commanding my fingers to lock into his hair. I pull him closer, imagining Suguru's weight crashing into me.

As the ache between my legs intensifies I ask, “What else would he do?”

“He’d work his way up your leg… past your skirt…” he slowly whispers. “And find your clit. Just to make sure she’s happy too.” His fingers travel to my panties, stopping just above my slit. He uses thumb to rub the cloth, and the trembles of his limitless cause me to moan. I roll back and forth, grinding against his hand, desperate for more. My moans are endless and slowly amplify every time the pressure increases.

When he realizes I’m enjoying myself, he runs his fingers along the edge of my panties. I whimper, wondering when he can put an end to this torture. I crave him so badly, I crave the feeling of him inside me—anything to help me find release. He finally gives in and slides my underwear to the side. As his touch grazes against my folds, I picture how good it would feel to have Suguru’s large hands cupping my center.

Satoru picks up on my thoughts and continues feeding my fantasy, “While he teases your pussy, Suguru would tell you that you’re already soaking wet…” The thought has me dripping more liquid onto his fingers. I feel his mouth curl into a smile and he whispers, “...but we’re only getting started.”

His fingers thrust inside me and I can feel the magnitude of his hands as my walls tighten around him. The thrill from his fingers barreling into me stun every inch of my body. I can feel my thighs clenching on the brink of release. His fingers find the sensitive spot within my walls and his mouth claims every spot on my body. His kisses become ravenous, like he can’t get enough. The more he devours me, the more he leaves me breathless.

I can hear him groan in delight and I notice the way his bulge presses against me through his pants. The desperation only makes him harder.

As the intensity grows, I cry for more. “Oh Suguru, just like that.”

“Do you like that, angel?” His pace remains steady as the sensation of cursed energy collects into his fingers. They continue to push against the insides of my center until I can’t take it anymore. The rhythmic motion leaves me breathless and I feel my body racing to its peak.

“Ugh, Suguru, fuck…that feels—”

“Does he make you feel good?” His voice feels heavy, like a low growl.

“Y—, ugh, ye—” I can’t form words through the pounding of his hand. He’s rapidly sending me to the edge and I’m ready to fall. “Suguru, you’re going to make me come.”

“Yes, angel.” Satoru says, before planting his lips onto mine. “Come for him.” 

Those words are enough to break me. The orgasm flows through my body and I feel myself beat around his fingers. His pace slows, but the sensual touch only brings more gratification. The thought of Suguru sending me into ecstasy leaves my body light, and my mind clear. The waves slowly subside and I feel myself resurrect. 

My hands head for the wrap on my eyes, but I hear Satoru whisper, “We’re not done yet, angel.”

I follow his lead and let the rumble of his voice bring me back into my dreams.

“Did you think Suguru would stop there?” he teases. “If there’s anyone he’d take special care of, it would be you.”

I feel his fingers slide out of me and I hear him lick the tips. “You taste so good.”

The words release a flutter in my core. I’m immediately enraptured and can’t help but crave more.

“Suguru would love this,” he starts. “Would you let him taste you too?”

“Yes,” I breathe.

I imagine Suguru’s strength as his hands cup my waist and he lifts me up on the desk. When I lean back, I feel him lift my shirt, exposing my breasts. “You’re so god damn beautiful.” His tongue licks my nipple before fully taking it into his mouth, giving it a playful tug.

“Please, I want you to taste me,” I plead. Liquid gushes out of me, giving him a good dose to start.

“As you wish, angel.” He bends down to hover his mouth over my center. I feel him linger before he adds, “Do you know what else Suguru likes to do?”

“Tell me,” I whisper.

“He likes making sure your pussy never goes dry,” he growls, letting his mouth devour my clit. The vibrations from his limitless amplify the sensation, and I’m on the verge of losing control. 

My body goes numb as his words echo through my head. He likes making sure your pussy never goes dry. I let out a moan, but it feels more like a cry. I completely unravel, feeling the tides of my orgasm come back to shore.

“Oh my god, Suguru. That feels so good. Don’t stop,” I cry.

As he continues to glide over me, I throw my head back and writhe in pleasure. His tongue goes up and down my center in a harmonious rhythm, and I’m so close to feeling ecstasy. His mouth on my lips may have felt needy, but his mouth on my pussy feels absolutely desperate. The ripples of his limitless accompany the motions and bring me to my limit. As he plants his hands on my thighs, I immediately crumble.

I melt into my orgasm as my legs tense up around him, squeezing him towards me. I picture Suguru’s hands gripping my thighs while he moans back in delight. My breath is quick, my heartbeat is unsteady. The muscles inside me contract and pulsate all over his tongue. He has me slick and he licks up every bit of the liquid that trickled from me.

“And that, my little angel… is a little taste of what you can expect from Suguru Geto,” Satoru chuckles.

I relax my legs and I feel one last kiss grace my center. I lay for a moment, feeling both lifeless, yet satiated. The thought of Suguru between my thighs still lingers in my mind.

“That was amazing, Suguru,” I breathed quietly.

As I sit up, my head is in a fog. I feel my brain spin for a moment. What just happened? Did I just have a wet dream about Suguru? Wait, no. Was it Satoru? It takes me a minute to recollect myself. Although I could see Suguru vividly in my mind, I remember that he wasn’t the person in the room. Anxiety surges throughout my body when I’m faced with the reality of what occurred.

I hear the door click, and rush to take off the wrap around my eyes. “Satoru, can we ta—”

To my dismay, there is no one else in the room. I see the blackboard behind me, the desk that seats me, three smaller desks in front of me, but Satoru is nowhere to be found.

Read Part 2 Here!

[theweasleytwinsownmyjuicyass]

You belong with me | L.N.

Lando Norris x driver!reader

Summary: Nothing is more painful than two people being scared of how much they love each other.

Warnings: angst, fluff, idiots in love <3

Word count: ~2.3K

^^ It‘s funny to look back at the past that had brought you into this situation. Which is being an F1 driver and helplessly in love with your best friend and racing partner.

Lando and you have been inseparable since your early karting days, in turn developing a strong bond over your shared love for the sport which grew more as you got to know each other better. You were both childish still, no matter the fact that you were nearing your mid 20‘s. But that was what you loved about you two as a pair. There was never judgment from the other and what one lacked the other filled perfectly.

Throughout the close friendship there were a few mishaps when the threshold of friendship had been overstepped but there was always a girlfriend or a boyfriend at the time holding you two restrained and loyal.

So naturally when you two finally became single at the same time and got signed into McLaren’s F1 team all you could think about was. This is it. Now is our time.

And as on queue Lando organized you a surprise. Just the two of you, middle of the starry summer’s night with the city lights below your feet. You were smiling so much that night, your cheeks had started to hurt, but how could you not smile when he was next to you, paying his whole attention to you and making you laugh.

You were sure that he was going to ask you out that night.

And then he didn’t’. It could not have been a more painful experience, but you kept up your smile even if your eyes had faded, no longer admiring the boy next to you, that was just too miserable.

Unrequited love was miserable.

Or so you had thought until about a month later when Lando brought in a girl for everyone to meet calling her his girlfriend.

Just then unrequited love became agonizing.

Your Lando was known for his cheerful disposition and infectious laughter. He was easily the happiest boy around! Well until the said girlfriend…

It was only a few weeks later that you noticed your friends’ colours fade.

About two months in the others started noticing and drilling you about it.

“What do you mean you don’t know? You two are best friends, you have to know what’s causing him so much stress lately” Carlos was making too many hand movements due to his own distress.

“I just don’t know, we don’t talk that much these days” you tucked your hair into your cap and stomped away from the Spaniard.

You didn’t want to admit it to Carlos or anyone else, but you and Lando weren’t the great friends you used to be.

You surely kept your distance since he got his girlfriend out of sheer respect to their relationship (and respect to your own mental health). Although it still seemed not enough for his girlfriend as on a few instances you caught her yelling at Lando in the cool offs to stop the friendship you shared.

To say the least that definitely put a wall between you two, but nevertheless it didn’t completely break your bond.

Now, nine months and one nasty breakup later the unrequited love feels excruciating.

A shadow has fallen over Lando’s already tainted personality. He was going through a painful breakup with his now ex-girlfriend. She had been a constant presence in his life for the past year, controlling his every move, every word and god forbid he didn’t get the right amount of points… Safe to say she was sucking life out of him as a ravenous vampire, though Lando was too blind to see that.

The breakup had taken a toll on Lando, leaving him almost senseless now that he was out of her hold, and it showed in his performance on the track. During the qualifying session for the upcoming race, he couldn't find his usual rhythm and ended up with a DNF after driving himself into a wall.

As he stepped out of his car, disappointment weighed heavily on him. Lando felt like he was losing everything now and the sadness from his failures compounded his frustration.

You had been there for Lando throughout the tumultuous relationship, supporting him in all the little ways you could, checking in before and after races and offering a listening ear whenever you could see him about to reach his limits.

But on this particular day, you could no longer listen to him whining about her, you have reached a breaking point. You couldn’t stand by and watch the man you cared for so deeply be consumed by a toxic woman who had done nothing but break him piece by piece for the past year.

"If I was better, she would still be with me." You heard Lando mumble as he laid on the sofa emotionless.

"LANDO STOP! You must be insane to be saying those things. How can you say that you're not enough? She was the one who didn't care about you, who was never here to support you. Lando, it's her who didn't deserve you, not the other way around!" you snapped, voice filled with tears.

"You don't get it. If I was enough, wouldn't there be girls who like me? Because not one of my girlfriends have actually liked me or, god forbid, loved me." Lando was drowning in self-doubt and it was suffocating you to the point where your heart physically ached seeing him so beat up.

"Can't you see why that is? Maybe you don't belong with any of those girls? Lando, maybe you belong with someone who loves you through your highs and lows, someone who can't bear to see you sad, someone who lets you cry into their shoulder in the middle of the night, and, most importantly, someone who can't stand watching you break yourself over some girl," frustration evident in your trembling voice muddled Lando.

"What are you trying to say, Y/n?"

You hesitated, heart racing, as you contemplated revealing your true feelings. "All this time, Lando, and you still can't see it."

Lando was bewildered, not comprehending your cryptic words. "See what?"

You were burning with passion, on the brink of confessing your feelings, but ultimately bit your tongue. You were praying for him, but he could not understand and you believed he never would and to express the delicate feelings right now seemed futile.

"Nothing," you replied, shaking your head to rid of the emotions taking over your rational brain, and left the room to preserve your patched up heart.

As you retreated, a storm of emotions raged within. You couldn't help but wonder if there would ever come a day when Lando would realize the truth you had left unsaid.

Your words left Lando conflicted and he hated it.

You were someone he could always count on to understand. Hell he never needed to read you, you were like a road he had taken day after day, he knew you so well, he could navigate without his senses.

Lando found himself seeking friendly counsel from Carlos, as he was still perplexed by your reaction and couldn't fathom why you had gotten so upset with him.

"I don't understand why she's so mad at me?! Can you believe it, she was even crying. I'm the one that got dumped, and she's pissed at me for picking the wrong girl?!" Lando vented pulling at his hair, frustration lacing his voice.

Carlos regarded him thoughtfully before posing a question that made Lando pause and reflect. "Lando, let me ask you this. If Y/n was dating a guy who constantly made her doubt herself and feel like shit, how would you feel?"

Lando’s response was interlaced with confusion, "Why the hell would she even date someone like that?"

"So to say you'd be pissed as well?" Carlos continued.

Lando struggled to find words to counter Carlos's argument. He had a point, and Lando was beginning to see things from a different perspective. "But I..."

Carlos interrupted him with a knowing smirk forming on his face, "You what?"

Lando thought about it, connecting the dots between his protective feelings for you and the turmoil he had experienced during his recent relationship. Carlos decided to push him closer to an epiphany.

"When you like someone, you don't want to see them hurting, but it's different to feel the pain of the other person. That's closer to-"

"Love," Lando finished, realization dawning. He abruptly grabbed his jacket and rushed out the door with a clear destination in mind.

It was time for Lando to confront the truth he had been avoiding, and perhaps, in the process, he might finally get what he had always wanted. You and love.

Everything was suddenly falling into place for Lando. He began to understand why you had never wanted to hang out whenever he got into a relationship, why you cried when he cried, why you sacrificed your sleep just to listen to him rant about the terrible things his ex had done, and crack jokes to make him smile. It all made sense, and he couldn't believe he hadn't seen it before.

Deep down, he had always known that the girls he dated were just placeholders, a way to distract himself from the perfect girl he felt undeserving of his whole life.

He had a brilliant idea last year when you both secured your McLaren positions. He planned a whole midnight drive and stargazing, which he knew you loved (that also prompted him to learn constellations for weeks before the special day, only to impress you). He wanted to ask you to be his and make it magical, but ultimately chickened out.

When the next day came around he could not face you and instead of spending the last few days before training with you he headed to a bar where he met his now ex. She was pretty and showed so much interest in him he could not not get hooked.

In that moment of absolute weakness Lando decided that having a girlfriend would solve the problem of loving his best friend and potentially ruining the friendship.

He could not have been more wrong. The relationship was an absolute hellhole, filled with insecurities and so many fights that he could no longer see himself as he looked in the mirror. Still no matter how bad his life got, he felt he deserved the purgatory for letting you slip through his fingers when he just had to hold on to you a bit tighter.

He’d never forgive himself for wasting so much time pushing you away. But he wasn’t going to settle for that. Lando was still a fighter. And fighting for you… well that now felt like his birthright.

“It's you!" Lando exclaimed bursting through the door, his voice echoing through the garage, his eyes locked directly on your form, disrupting the calm chatter around the room.

The entire room came to a standstill, eyebrows furrowing, and the atmosphere thick with confusion. Your eyes found his, equally as bewildered as the rest of the staff in the room.

Lando repeated himself, his breathy voice much lighter and softer than before. "It's you."

"Me what?" You asked, face still a mix of confusion as you tried to grasp the meaning of his words.

With each step he took closer to you, your heartbeat quickened, uncertain of the nature of those words, and just how much was hidden beneath them.

"It's always been you," Lando confessed, his voice filled with sincerity. "I've never loved anyone because you've held my heart since you smiled at me on your first day in karting. I have loved you this whole time, but I was too scared and too stupid, honestly, to do anything about it, letting myself push away my feelings by running to someone else. But I'm not scared anymore because you don't deserve to be loved silently and from afar. You are the kind of woman that is meant to be loved loudly, with no second thoughts."

“Lan…” words deceived you.

“I love you Y/n and I’m not afraid to feel it and say it anymore. And I hope that one day you can tell me that you love me too” his hands found yours, the touch of his skin on your hands felt different.

Your cheeks heat up with his confession and you search his eyes who confirm his words to be true. He does love you. And you love him too. You’ve thought your love for him unrequited for so long that hearing him say those words to you seems like a daydream.

You realize by his fading eyes that you’ve been too silent through his confession. You know exactly what the look of doubt looks like on Lando’s face and you speak up quickly promising yourself that you’ll never be the cause of that distressing look on his face.

“Took you long enough to realize Norris” you chuckle pressing a soft kiss to his lips.

He catches up to you quickly wrapping his arms around you waist deepening the kiss.

“You belong with me.” He whispers, the warm words fall on your lips right before he kisses you again, both of you smiling into the kiss.

The room erupted in cheers and applause, congratulating the new couple. Finally, Lando had found what he had been searching for all along, right by his side, and you got what you’d been wishing for since you were little. A two sided love. You both were ready to embrace your love openly, no longer bound by doubt and hesitation.

^^

A.N. back again with that Taylor Swift inspiration :3

P.s. I think my neighbors hate me because I be listening to one song on repeat for like 4h..... *skull emoji*

[caffeineforbucky]

Cruel Summer

Summary: After a two-year absence from your family, you return home for your father's birthday and unexpectedly reconnect with his friend, John Price. A serendipitous attraction emerges, leading to a challenging summer.

Pair: 'Captain' DBF!John Price x AFAB!Reader

WC: 2,008

Warnings: Minors DNI 18+, Age gap. Reader is 26 and John is 37, swearing, longing, some fluff...? Lemme know if I missed any

A/N: I fear it's been a minute since I wrote anything for this blog. This fic might be a few parts. It's been sitting in my drafts for freaking months and I was too excited to get the first part out.

BY CLICKING KEEP READING, YOU ARE CONFIRMING THAT YOU'RE 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

"Come on, honey," Your mother's voice resonates in the emptiness of your small kitchen, and the sting in your eyes makes it hard to focus, vision blurring with a haze of murkiness.

With the heel of your palm, you brush away the lamentation on your lashes, heedless in your movements, as you shove a couple of hoodies, books, and other insignificant items into a box—a box of your ex's things. The things he left behind.

"Your dad hasn't seen you in two years. His birthday is coming up in a couple of days, and the only thing he talks about missing his little girl."

That manages to make you smile, if only for a moment. A fleeting glimpse of happiness amidst your heartbreak. "Ryder's there. Dad can have his little boy there instead."

Ryder—your older brother. He was only five years older than you, but while growing up together, you two were inseparable. There was the occasional bickering and fighting, but like all siblings, you grew apart.

He had his life, and you had yours.

"I can hear your dumbass, you know that, don't you?" He tuts through the speaker of your cell phone, and it causes you to snort. He was already with the rest of your family since flying in the night before. Ryder's remark is met with hushes from your mom before she playfully shoves him to continue the phone call with you. Just like old times.

"I don't know, ma..." You mumble, trying your bestest to make it sound like you aren't crying. You knew she worried about you. More than you would've liked, but she was your mother. My job is to worry. She would say. "I've got a lot going on over here and—"

She cuts you off before you can finish.

"Please? I will have to tell your dad when he asks, and he'll start crying and... just come. Even if it's for a day or two. He really wants to see you, and so do I. I miss my baby."

A heavy sigh escapes you, letting your face fall into your palms to wipe the rest of your tears with the tips of your fingers. As badly as you want to refuse, the guilt of not seeing your family in so long starts to creep in, trying to gnaw its way into your conscience.

"Okay, Mom," You finally relent after a couple minutes of silence. You knew how much your parents missed you, and you'd let the lust for independence take you away from the people you loved most, and that was something to feel guilty about. "I'll come."

Your mother's excited squeal makes you flinch, and for some reason, her felicity causes a few more tears to slip down your cheeks, even if you manage a soft chuckle. "Oh, I'm so excited. Your dad is going to flip. I gotta make up your room and—Ryder! I'll talk to you soon, baby. We can't wait to see you."

There were a plethora of responsibilities John had to fulfill when he agreed to attend his best friend’s birthday. He had a job; a task force to forefront. A war to conquer. Nevertheless, he was here, in the backyard of said friends' beach house.

He was used to noise. The bustling crowds of civilians, obnoxious music, and the occasional yelps of children chasing each other around. It all resonated as white noise; his ears filtering out what wasn’t of import.

The smell of grilled hamburger patties permeated the air, his eyes focused on the finesse of each flip.

The tap of his fingers drummed rhythmically against the neck of his beer bottle, smiling and nodding as your father went on and on about his endeavors during his time in the Army.

A broken record; really. The stories weren’t new, at least, not to him—having been a part of those tales himself. The hardships and challenges of having to partake in such horrific adventures. If you can even call them that. Your father had such a colorful vernacular.

John’s eyes looked up in a lazy sweep as he heard the sound of your mother’s voice emitting as the back door slid open. As he took another swig of his beer, there you were.

The man almost choked. The beer comes back up in a fit of coughs, earning a few swats on the back from your father.

“You okay, John?” Your father eyed him humorously, chuckling as he flipped a couple more burgers.

John couldn’t speak, solely nodding as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, mindful of drying off his facial hair.

Fucking hell…

Clad in a cream-colored sundress, every dip and curve of your body was accentuated, the swell of your assets making his mouth water. You were an absolute dream. A fantasy he couldn’t imagine ever thinking of. You were stunning.

He let his eyes trace the outline of your body, from the cherry pattern on your dress to the pretty little red ballet flats you had on.

John had prided himself in being devout to his career. Nothing came between him or it. In his thirty-seven years of being alive, he never once tried to settle down or even dabble in a relationship for fear of never giving enough or never being present. He’d have the occasional fuck, but that was once in a while.

His life wasn’t promised; not in the way he had any control over. Then again, who does?

For the first time since joining the Army, he thought of marriage, and he immediately shook that thought away.

He nudged your father, making him turn toward the profile of his face. With his hand still wrapped around the neck of the bottle, he gestured towards you. “Is that—“

“Ah, there she is!” Your father rejoiced, setting down the spatula as you headed towards where they both stood, your mother trailing behind. John stood idle as he watched you move into your dad’s arms with a semi-forced smile.

“Hey, Dad.” You greet him, letting him rock you back and forth in a tight embrace. “Happy birthday.” Regardless if you’d arrived the day before, your dad was still excited that you were here.

"Thank you, pumpkin."

John watched the interaction from the corner of his eye, a strange feeling tugging at his gut. You were no longer that little girl he remembered—you were a woman now. He took another swig of his beer, curiosity and desire brewing within him.

Once your father had released you from his bear hug, your eyes met with John's. A surprised expression graced your face, recognition flashing across your eyes as if you had completely forgotten that he could also be there. "John?" You questioned, your voice softer than he remembered. 'That you?" There was a hint of a tremble, but it was quickly masked by a polite smile.

"Hey there, sweetheart." He greeted, his voice firm yet gentle. He couldn't help but let his eyes wander over you once more, drinking in the sight of you. It was almost as if he was seeing you for the first time. "Aye. It's me."

You chuckled softly, shaking your head in disbelief. "I can't believe it's been fifteen years. You haven't changed much, you know."

John couldn't help but chuckle at your comment, feeling a sense of warmth spreading through him. Fifteen years…

You had to be around twenty-six now.

"I would say the same about you, but—" he replied, letting his gaze linger on yours for a moment longer than necessary. "You've grown up beautifully."

The compliment seemed to take you by surprise, your cheeks flushing a soft tinge. You quickly turned your gaze away from him, focusing on your father who was grilling the patties. "Thanks, John." You muttered, the unease in your voice not going unnoticed by him. Neither did that color on your cheeks.

You could recall the little girl crush you used to have on him all those years ago, when it was adolescent, innocent, and pure. Something to laugh off because it was cute.

But now, standing here as an adult, the feelings that stirred within you when John's gaze lingered on you were anything but innocent. It was a confusing, frightening, yet somehow thrilling realization—one that you knew you would have to confront sooner or later.

Your mother, who had been watching the entire exchange with the sharp eyes of a hawk, nudged you gently, whispering something about helping her out in the kitchen. You took the opportunity to escape, excusing yourself from the men's company. As you turned to leave, you felt John's eyes on you, following your retreating figure. A shiver ran down your spine, but you forced yourself to ignore it.

After you'd left, an awkward silence fell between the two men. John took another swig of his beer, trying to shake off the strange feelings that your presence had stirred up within him. The tension was palpable, a thick fog of unspoken words and hidden desires. It wasn't like him to be so affected, and yet, there was something about you that left him in a state of bewilderment.

His gaze lingered on the spot where you had stood moments ago, the image of your flushed cheeks and the softness of your voice etched into his mind. He raked a hand through his hair, a sigh escaping his lips. This was dangerous territory. He knew it but seemed powerless to pull himself away from the allure.

Your father, completely oblivious to his friend's internal struggle, continued flipping burgers, a contented smile on his face. He hummed a tune under his breath, his eyes bright with happiness. Every now and then, he would glance towards the kitchen door, awaiting your return.

"John," He started, his voice pulling John out of his reverie. "You've gone quiet on me, mate." Your father’s jovial tone contrasted starkly with the turmoil raging within John.

John managed a weak smile, forcing out a chuckle. "Just lost in thought, I guess," he replied, not meeting your father's gaze. He took another sip of his beer, the cold liquid doing little to ease the heat creeping up his neck.

Your father simply laughed, shaking his head. "You've always been a bit of a daydreamer, haven't you?" He said, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "Just don't go getting lost in your thoughts. We've got a party to enjoy."

John nodded, forcing himself to focus on the present, on the sizzle of the burgers, the sound of laughter from the crowd...anything but his best friend's daughter. But no matter how hard he tried, his thoughts were preoccupied with you.

As the sun began to set, the party continued in full swing. The laughter and chatter grew louder, the music more upbeat, and the atmosphere more festive. But amidst the sea of faces, John's gaze kept drifting back to you.

Your laughter echoed in his ears, your smile imprinted in his memory. Every now and then, he would catch glimpses of you, your silhouette illuminated by the setting sun, your face glowing with genuine happiness. You were like a beacon of light, drawing him in, and he found himself unable to resist.

You were everywhere he looked, in every corner he turned. With each passing moment, the pull he felt towards you grew stronger, more potent. It was like a magnetic force that seemed impossible to resist. It scared him, baffled him, yet excited him in a way he had never experienced before.

He watched as you interacted with the guests, your laughter filling the air. Your eyes sparkled with mirth, your cheeks flushed with excitement. You were the life of the party, and he couldn't help but be captivated by you.

And as he watched you in the warm candlelight of your father's birthday cake, your smile wide as you sang along with your family, he knew he was in trouble. Because for the first time in a long time, he found himself wanting something he knew he couldn't have.

You.

Oh god. It's so embarrassing how long this took to actually write. Please please lemme know what ya'll think. Feedback is greatly appreciated. Should I continue this? ;) Enjoyxx

[wileys-russo]

childhood sweethearts (5) II a.russo x reader

series playlist part one part two part three part four

and as we await the fate of our two main protagonists eventual kiss. its time to find out what really happened six years ago. childhood sweethearts (5) II a.russo x reader

"do i need to pick you up tomorrow then?" your older sister lily asked as she pulled up outside the russo household, drumming her fingers on her steering wheel as you unbuckled and shook your head.

"no i'll probably stay the full weekend and just go to school with less on monday." you shrugged, reaching around to grab your bag off the backseat. "what about your uniform? books? your bag?" your sister frowned as you opened her door.

"i've got a spare uniform here, i can borrow a bag to put my stuff in and i've already got my books with me, i have to study." you patted your overnight bag as the girl rolled her eyes. "of course you do, does your brain even know what a weekend is or do you mentally go to school 7 days a week?" she jeered as you mocked her and flipped her off, closing her door as her window rolled down.

"some of us have aspirations to graduate lilian." you smiled, your sister having dropped out early to pursue a career in cosmetics which had lasted all of three months. "have a shit time dickhead!" your sister called out after you as you made your way down the driveway, flipping her off again without turning around.

"none of that here thank you young lady." your face flushed red as carol opened the front door for you before you'd even arrived, having seen you through the window. "sorry carol." you smiled guiltily, giving her a hug as she let you in with an amused smile.

"lessi's just showering sweetheart." the woman explained as you hummed, leaving your bag by the lounge and following her to the kitchen, you'd been wondering why the girl hadn't responded to you on the way over here and now it made sense.

"shortstack! i saw your hot sister dropped you off." gio wiggled his eyebrows suggestively before pulling you into a gentle headlock as you rounded the corner. "urgh you're like my brother gio thats so weird!" you gagged at the comment, wrestling to try and remove his arm to no use.

"oi get off her!" his grip disappeared as alessia entered, bottle blonde hair pulled up into a damp bun on her head as she punched her brother in the ribs, immediately pulling you into a protectively tight hug as gio let you go with a loud groan of pain.

"mum!" the boy huffed in complaint, your girlfriend rolling her eyes and mumbling an apology as the older women told her off. "i wish you'd fuck off back to jordan." the boy sulked, grabbing an apple and heading back upstairs to his room as carol yelled after him for swearing.

your girlfriend had only just gotten back yesterday from a week away at a junior lionesses tournament which had been held in jordan. as much as you'd missed her dearly you couldn't have been more proud of her or the two goals she scored, getting her rightful start in the final game. you'd only wished you were able to be there but you didn't have the luxury of a national call up as an excuse to miss a week of school.

"we'll be in my room mum." alessia announced, arm slung over your shoulder as the woman hummed and waved you off, head buried in a recipe book making you smile as your girlfriend lead you away, stopping to grab your bag for you, silencing your protests with a very quick peck to your lips after she'd triple checked no one else was around.

the pair of you had been seeing one another officially for almost two years now however no one but each other actually knew that, and just assumed you were best friends, forever thick as thieves and inseparably close.

neither of you had any idea how no one had caught on yet, maybe it was because you and alessia had always been so close and so affectionate nothing seemed out of sorts to the average eye.

you'd always loved alessia in one way or another. but when it was just the two of you behind a closed door and your lips were pressed together, cold hands roaming one anothers bodies, murmuring everything and anything you loved about the other, you were absolutely infatuated with her in a way so intense it was almost scary.

and that was one sort of love you both agreed you weren't ready to share with anyone but each other just yet.

though both of you did need to often stumble through pools of awkward lies and ramble quickly made up stories as you'd be called out by your friends for the occasional poorly placed or forgotten about hickey.

this was normally your problem. ever since she'd figured out how sensitive your neck was the taller girl utilised every and any opportunity to capitolise on that.

riled on by the whiny begs for her not to stop as she hungrily attacked and devoured your neck late at night, silencing you with a hand pressed over your mouth and a gentle warning in your ear that if you weren't quiet she would stop.

"hi." you breathed out with a grin, looking up adoringly at the striker once the two of you were finally alone behind the safety and security of her locked bedroom door. "god i missed you." alessia sighed, pulling you into a bone crushing hug as you reveled in one anothers touch.

"we spoke every day lessi!" you laughed into her shoulder, alessia having been told off both by her roommate ella and her coach for the hours spent on her phone when she was supposed to be resting and recovering.

"we could be together every minute of every day and i'd still miss you." the blonde pulled away with a cheeky smile as you rolled your eyes playfully. "don't wish that on me please, what a nightmare!" you groaned teasingly as your girlfriend scoffed, holding a hand to her chest in mock offence.

"lessi!" you squealed as she tackled you down onto her bed, hovering over you. "that's baby to you, thanks very much." alessia pouted as you laughed, thumb stroking her cheek affectionately. "there is also something else i missed that we can't do on the phone." the blonde smiled suggestively, cocking her head to the side as her hair fell around you both like a curtain.

"mmm...nothing comes to mind." you looked off into the distance as if deep in thought, hand coming to stroke your chin as alessia playfully shoved your head. "kiss me then star girl." you smiled softly, tugging at her shirt.

as your eyes met, the world seemed to fade away. you felt her hand gently touch your cheek, slender fingers tracing a line down your jawline. hearts raced as her lips met yours, soft and gentle at first, then with a growing intensity as she poured into the kiss just how much she had missed you.

if you were sentenced to death the next day and were allowed one last day to do as you pleased, you'd be sure to spend it kissing alessia.

every single time felt just like the first. the same nervous butterflies would flutter around inside you, lips would tingle as if you'd just smeared them with popping candy, your heart grew five sizes to the point it felt it might burst in your chest.

each kiss was full of tenderness and passion, a dance of two hearts in perfect harmony as the girl who you trusted with your heart and your life drowned you with her love.

you felt her arms wrap even tighter around you, pulling your bodies close as you lost yourselves in the moment. the world around you ceased to exist, leaving only the two of them in a sea of pure unbridled emotion, two hearts beat as one.

her lips always slightly chapped melded against yours perfectly, kissing you with just the right amount of firm pressure to have your stomach in knots, and yet each touch felt so soft and so tender that your brain went fuzzy at the sensation.

her hand would always reach out to tangle in your hair as your own gently carressed her cheek, thumb stroking her jawline, feeling it clench at the featherlight touch.

and then suddenly your lungs would scream for a reprise and you'd pull away, collapsing into the mattress as both of you lay on your sides, eyes locked as chests heaved and alessia leant forward to brush a few flyaways behind your ear.

gone were the afternoons of her kicking a ball at your head, smearing mud on your face as the two of you wrestled and rolled around in the dirt like steam rollers.

your afternoons now were spent wrapped up in the others arms, sharing kisses as you filled one another in on the seemingly more mundane parts of your day the other hadn't been present for, you and alessia only sharing two classes in your final year of school.

on the days alessia trained after school you studied, often at her house in her bedroom eagerly awaiting her to return.

the striker would have left her boots outside at her mums strict request, trudging up the stairs with an exhausted sigh as you'd perk up hearing the squeak of the infamous stair the two of you learned to avoid when sneaking downstairs for a midnight snack.

she would shoulder open her door and dump her kit bag on the ground, making a beeline for her bed and belly flopping normally on top of you, face buried in your neck as she clung onto you tightly with a mumbled greeting hello.

sometimes you'd wind her up and tell her you wouldn't kiss her until she showered, dodging her attempts as you teased her for smelling terribly which normally ended in her trapping you in a bear hug beneath her until you tapped out on her back and gave in, allowing her lips to finally meet yours.

other times she'd have been told she wasn't starting next game and her head would hang low from the moment she entered the room. you'd immediately sit up and brush your books to the side, opening your arms for her to melt into. carding your fingers through her hair and slipping a hand up her top you'd hold her tightly, rubbing circles on her back, lips lingering on her sweaty forehead.

as you'd always known, you loved alessia, nowadays in a way much more intimate and tender than you'd have ever understood in your youth.

"you're so beautiful." the taller girl spoke softly as you lay side by side, words melting you like butter as you couldn't help but blush, no matter how often she complimented you it still had you swooning.

"why are you so shy? it's very cute baby but we've known each other like our whole lives." alessia laughed as you hid your face in your hands, the blonde prying them away and attacking your face with kisses only making your cheeks heat up further.

her leg nudging yours as you lifted one, allowing hers to slot in perfectly, your limbs tangled up as your foreheads pressed against one anothers.

"il mio bel bambino." (my pretty baby) her lips moved to gently kiss your fingertips, hands held captive in hers.

"you learned more italian!" your face lit up in pride as alessia eagerly nodded, beginning to ramble about how she had made it her mission to continue her online lessons even while away.

"alessia mia teresa russo studying in her free time? has there been an doomsday i wasn't aware of? are you feeling okay?" you gasped holding the back of your hand to her forehead, squealing as her fingers jabbed sharply at your sides.

"yeah well unlike school work this is something i actually want to learn!" she rolled her eyes and you grinned, kissing her nose and swooning as she scrunched it up adorably.

"hey. can we talk about something?" the blonde asked hesitantly, eyes dropping down to avoid yours, messing with your fingers as you nodded, eyebrows knitting into a curiously concerned frown at what was to come.

"okay but i don't know how you'll react so we have to do the thing." alessia decided, looking to you for confirmation as you hummed, the two of you sitting up and spinning around suddenly.

you shuffled slightly so your back was pressed against hers, hands finding one anothers and intertwining your fingers as your heads slumped onto one anothers shoulders, eyes closing.

"what's on your mind lessi?" you asked softly, squeezing her hands supportively as she let out a long sigh. "well. when we were away a few of the girls were talking about their...well their first times, with their boyfriends." alessia started quietly, her heart hammering away in her chest with every word.

"and i guess it just got me thinking about it." she spoke a little quicker now, clearly nervous for your reaction to her words, squeezing your left hand to signal she was done talking for now.

"some of the girls at school have been talking about it too." you confessed. "are you thinking about...wanting to do that?" you asked gently, not wanting her to feel as though you were judging her in any way. "maybe? does that make you feel...weird, or anything?" she asked slowly.

"no, definitely not weird." you promised, the two of you sitting in silence for a moment. "i guess i think i'm ready? to do that. but i don't want you to feel like...pressured into anything. we can do it soon, we can do it later, we can never do it if you didn't want to." she assured, starting to ramble as you squeezed her hands, grounding her into silence again.

"i want to do it with someone i love and someone i trust and you're the person i love and trust the most lessi. i think i'm ready too, whenever it happens." you spoke softly, unable to see the blush creep up your girlfriends neck at your words.

and it did happen. it was a couple of months later when you had your house to yourselves, your parents having taken your brother away for the weekend for a cricket tournament and your sister disappearing around to her boyfriends house.

the first time it was awkward, nervous, weird and clumsy of course, neither of you had done anything like this before and you'd have been lying to one another if you said you both hadn't tried to do some...research on your own to try and best prepare.

but despite that, it was with alessia.

you felt safe and you felt comfortable and loved the whole time, it didn't quite have the ending either of you expected (that sort of ending came a few weeks later and boy oh boy...no amount of research could have prepared you for the feeling) but it only strengthened the trust between the two of you, and was yet another first you'd experienced by one anothers loving side.

they always say your first love is a little foolish, some may even say there isn't something called first love. but what makes those initial feelings of love most beautiful are it's innocence.

when you fall in love for the very first time, that innocence inside you, that's a precious thing. it feels like you give your whole heart to someone, and as if you wouldn't ever know anyone else to treasure and care for it.

which is why it was all too easy for alessia russo to be both your first love, and your first heartbreak.

~

it all started the day you got the letter.

your mum had found it first, fighting her every urge to rip it open and read your fate, instead leaving it neatly on your pillow for you to find when you returned home that afternoon.

you'd spent the day with the russo's, thermos of her dads famous hot chocolate in your hand, bundled up in a hoodie with your girlfriends jersey tugged over the top. you sat shoulder to shoulder with her brothers in the stands, watching your favorite blonde play in one of her final games of the season.

you didn't pretend to understand half the rules of football much as alessia had dedicated years of her life trying to teach you, and so her brothers knew to hit you with running commentary throughout. but the one thing you would always understand was the sense of utter euphoric pride which rushed through you watching her play, especially when she scored.

her arms would shoot up into the air and her eyes would always find yours, pointing up at you and her family with a lopsided grin, sprinting to celebrate with her teammates as you all screamed out encouragement, drowning her in whistles and claps before play resumed.

coming away with a 4-1 win meant they were in pole position to finish top of the table, and so alessia was unable to wipe the shit eating grin off her face as she emerged from the change rooms afterwards, waving goodbye to her team mates and jogging over to where you all waited for her.

she'd always hug her dad first, your girlfriend was the true epitome of his girl, and mario reveled in teasingly holding that over carol. you were always last, alessia always saved the best for last, picking you up and spinning you around off your feet as you'd laugh and sing her praises, the two of you hugging tightly.

"i love when you wear my jersey." she mumbled in your ear, sending you a soft smile as you bumped your shoulder into hers and the two of you made your way back to the car, her brothers talking her ear off about the game as you stayed stuck to her side, watching on with a quiet amusement, not understanding most of what was said but feeling nothing but pride for the taller blonde beside you.

luca had driven himself and gio as they waved you both off and headed across the lot, you and alessia slipping into the back of her dads car. her mum would always fuss over the two of you, throwing a blanket over your legs and ignoring alessia's insistence that she was still warm after running around for two hours, carol always winning out as your girlfriend rolled her eyes and gave in.

but the blanket gave the opportunity for your hand to grab hers, squeezing softly as you looked at her in admiration, her head falling tiredly to your shoulder as the two of you chatted along to her parents, waving them off as you pulled up outside your house.

you promised you'd give your mum a hug for carol, hugging them both goodbye. normally her dad would warn he'd be out the front no later than eight since you both had school the next day, but now graduated there wasn't a reason the two of you couldn't spend the next few days together if you wanted, likely flittering from house to house as you often did.

appeasing your mum with small talk for a few minutes you grew impatient, tugging on the back of alessias hoodie with a longing look as the girl would make an excuse, the two of you hurrying off to your room.

"why do you always make me end the conversations. i quite like chatting with your mum!" alessia rolled her eyes as you closed your bedroom door. "because she loves you more and she actually listens to you. and because i haven't properly congratulated you yet for winning!" you grinned as your girlfriend sat on the end of your bed.

"mm that so?" the blonde smiled, arms settling themselves around your waist as her chin rested on your stomach, your own hands playing with the baby hairs on the nape of her neck.

you were about to lean down and kiss her, when your eyes spotted it.

alessia noticed your frown right away, squeezing your hips to gain your attention as you shook your head, stepping away from her and making a beeline for the letter.

"shit is that-" "i think it is." "well, open it!"

"i'm scared. what if i didn't get in?" you admitted, biting your bottom lip nervously as alessia sat right by your side. "you're the most intelligent person both intellectually and emotionally that i've ever met baby, and you got phenomenal marks in our GCSE's. open it!" she knocked her knee against yours and you nodded.

"oh for god sakes." alessia huffed impatiently as you fiddled with the corner, peeling it off painstakingly slow as your girlfriend plucked it out of your hands, ripping the letter right open.

"no you read it." you shook your head as she tried to give it back to you, alessia nodding as her eyes scanned over the paper, face unreadable as you nervously bounced your knee.

"we regret to inform-" your body crumpled at that, flopping back into the mattress as you felt tears prick at the corner of your eyes. "only joking baby. you got in!" alessia pounced on top of you with a grin as you shot upwards, accidentally smacking your head into hers.

"oh my god i got in?!" you breathed out in shock as the blonde clutched at her throbbing head. "oh god baby i'm so sorry!" you squeaked out as she waved you off with a wince, opening her arms expectantly.

"i am so fucking proud of you. my pretty, smart, funny, kind, gorgeous-" the older girl kissed you with every word, the grin unable to be wiped from your face as your mum burst in, alessia very quickly jumping away from you as you filled her in on the news.

and as you jumped up to embrace her, your sister next to run in to congratulate you, alessia couldn't have possibly been any prouder.

but she also couldn't help but allow her mind to drift back to the box sitting in her wardrobe, signed four year scholarship and enrollment papers filled in and ready to be sent off to the states.

she knew she needed to tell you. but the thought of doing so punched a hole in her chest, and so she put it off as long as possible.

well, as long as she could until you found out yourself.

~

it was around a couple of weeks later, you were spending your usual friday night together, movies loaded and armfuls of snacks spread out on the bed awaiting consumption.

"lessi baby can i have a hoodie please?" you kissed your girlfriends jaw softly, the girl humming and pointing her foot toward her cupboard, engrossed in a video on her phone.

"yeah thanks, such a gentlewoman." you muttered, smacking her thigh as the girl whined and shoved you away. with a roll of your eyes at her lack of attention on you, you thrust open her cupboard, hunting around for your favourite hoodie which you knew she'd hidden, no longer wanting you to steal it as it was also her favourite to wear.

with a victorious grin you spotted the sleeve poking out from a pile of jumpers in the corner, rolling your eyes at her poor attempt at hiding and yanking it out. you frowned as a box lay hidden beneath the material, UNC on the front.

curiousity getting the better of you, assuming it was likely a new pair of trainers she'd bought and hidden from her mum as to not be told off for her spending habits, you opened it.

god, how you wished you hadn't.

your stomach leapt into your mouth as your eyes scanned just the first few words of the letter sat atop a bright blue sweatshirt.

"less. what's this?" at first she only hummed, attention still fixated on the video. "alessia. what is this?" you spoke louder now, the girls phone dropping from her hand as she looked up and saw what you had in your hand.

"baby-" "why the hell have you got a four year american football contract hidden in your wardrobe?"

"i wish you hadn't found that." she sighed, burying her face in her hands as you advanced toward her. "were you even going to tell me?" you whispered now, her head shooting up at the sudden change of tone.

"of course i was! i just...i didn't know how." she admitted guiltily, standing and trying to come toward you but you held your hand up in warning for her not to. "you didn't even tell me you were thinking about something like this, we tell each other everything." your voice cracked and with it so did alessia's heart at the look of utter betrayal splayed across your features.

"love-" "stop. don't fucking coddle me, explain." you forced out, letter still gripped tightly in your hand as you took another step back. "it's a four year scholarship to go play in the states. so long as i play with their junior team i can go to classes, live on campus and get my degree for free, and i get a hell of a lot of experience with a completely different style of football." she explained, a smile tugging momentarily at her lips, wiped right away at the look of disappointment on yours.

"i knew you wouldn't want me to go, or you'd try to talk me out of it." alessia admitted quietly, refusing to meet your eyes. "you what?" you managed out, shaking your head in disbelief. "i-" you started, trying to find the words.

"alessia i have always been your biggest supporter. i don't even like football but i go to every match, i make sure your kit bags got everything in it before you leave, i wear your jerseys, i let you kick balls at my head for years! you adore football. why on earth would you think i'd try to stop you from following that passion?" you frowned, shoulders slumping in defeat at her lack of faith in you.

"because it means we'd be apart for four years. don't even try to tell me you wouldn't have had an issue with that!" you were caught off guard at her sudden shift of tone, this one much more abrupt and sharp.

"don't try to project your guilt for not telling me into me being the reason why you didn't. that's not fair!" you shot back, alessia only shaking her head with a laugh. "you shouldn't have even been snooping around in the first place!" she snatched the letter off of you with a glare.

"snooping? i can see that offer is signed alessia, were you even going to tell me before you sent it off?" you asked with a hard stare, face falling as guilt flashed across her face momentarily. "you've already sent it." you realized quietly, her head hanging low all the confirmation you needed.

"wow." you breathed out, moving to sit down on the edge of her bed as you tried to come to terms with everything, feeling her sit down a few feet away from you. "when do you leave?" you whispered, feeling her eyes pierce into the side of your head but not having the heart to look up from the floor, the room starting to spin.

"two weeks."

your head did shoot up at that, alessia wincing at the anger, hurt, betrayal and disappointment clear as day in your features. "two fucking weeks. you didn't tell me and you leave in two weeks?" you breathed out, tears welling up in the corner of your eyes.

"i was going to i promise but i just...i thought it would make everything easier if we didn't-" alessia struggled with her words, tripping over herself as her fingers twitched and she rubbed her palms against her sweats.

"make what easier?" you caught on right away to what she meant, the room starting to feel awfully small as your chest tightened. and meeting your eyes alessia knew you knew what she meant. "everything." the blondes own eyes welled up with tears as you wiped at your face with the back of your arm.

"were you even going to tell me?" you asked, scarily calm as you stared her down, watching her wither underneath your piercingly angry gaze. "no." she admitted after a moment, burying her head in her hands, body wracking with quiet sobs as she began to break.

your legs buckled at that and your body fell to her floor with a small thump, your knees tucking into your chest as you curled into a ball. "so you were going to just leave and what? expect me to just...be okay with that?" you asked, unable to even wrap your head around any of this.

"you're going to college here, i'll be over there. it wouldn't have worked for four years and we both deserve to be able to make the best of this next chapter, i thought i was making it easier if we never had to say goodbye." alessia admitted quietly, both of you refusing to look at one another.

"never mind the fact i'm in love with you. i've been your best friend since we were five less, and you were going to just...get on a plane and leave me for four years without even telling me where you were going." you whispered, barely able to get your words out as red hot guilt flooded the blondes body.

"i was trying to make it easier."

"for who alessia? for you? by avoiding having to even tell me anything and just leaving me without a word? you're a fucking coward!" you almost screamed those last four words, chest heaving as you struggled to hold back a sob.

her silence told you everything you needed to as you broke down, your body convulsing as you sobbed into your hands, alessia covering her ears unable to handle the noise, tears rolling down her cheeks leaving a bitter salty taste in her mouth.

"get off me!" you spat out, shoving her off as she moved to sit down next to you, trying to wrap herself around you in a hug. "get off!" you yelled again, voice cracking as she shook her head, holding you firmly.

eventually she let go, collapsing into herself as you stood to your feet, vision blurry with tears as you stumbled around trying to collect your belongings.

"stop!" you sobbed as she hugged you from behind, yanking your bag out of your hands and dropping it on the floor. "don't leave me, please." she begged, voice no louder than a whisper as her face buried itself in your neck.

"i'm not the one leaving." you pushed her away, the force causing her to stumble as she caught herself and managed to stay standing. "you know now. we still have two weeks!" she tried, almost begging now as you scoffed.

"oh so i have two weeks to wait for you to break up with me? lucky me!" you spat venomously, trying to pick up your bag as alessia kicked it away. "we have two weeks we can spend together before i go. please! i made a mistake, a huge mistake. baby please i love you so much but-" her hands balled at your top, holding you against her.

"if you loved me you would have never lied to me about this. you would have told me the moment you even starting thinking about it! we could have talked it out! worked things out together! now i don't have a fucking choice and you don't understand how unfair that is alessia!" you pushed her harder and harder with every sentence until she smacked into the wall, blue eyes welled up with tears.

"baby please don't go! not like this!" she grabbed you again as you tried, wrapping her arms around you as you fought her furiously, hitting her over and over as her body shook with silent sobs but she refused to let go of you, feeling her tears drip down the back of your neck.

"i would have been okay if we were able to talk about this. if i had time to process this, to make plans with you, to talk about what it could have looked like for us and what we'd be when you were there. i would have supported you and this choice if you'd given me the chance." you finally broke free, stumbling away from her as you gestured between the two of you before furiously wiping at your eyes.

"but you didn't and you weren't going to. you're a liar and a coward and i can't believe i wasted so much of my life trying to show you i care for it all to mean nothing to you in the end. if you love me less, if you ever loved me, then you will do as you planned. you will get on that plane and you will stay out of my life. you're not my girlfriend, not even a friend would do what you just did to me." you wanted to say more, you wished you could find the words, you wished you could hit her again and scream that you hated her and mean every single word you just said to her.

but you didn't, you couldn't, you wished you could, it would have made it all easier.

you didn't allow her the luxury of a response, far too afraid of how easy it may have been for her to talk her way out of this, to lull you into a false sense of safety and security with sweet words and gentle intimate touches. to shower you with affection and quality time and praise, only to rip the rug right out from under you in just two weeks time.

so you left her before she could leave you, and you didn't turn once to look back.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

part six

[thegirlamongthestars]

work for it - c. alcaraz

author’s note: I’m planning on turning this into a series. Not lineal episodes but definetly writing about these two characters and their encounters in the village.

summary: Carlos is the sensation of the Olympic village but certain Spanish volley player is about to turn his world upside down

wc: 1,3k

warnings: none (just a couple suggestive phrases)

“Wonderfull training girls!” our coah said giving us both a hug. “Now go and get some rest, you deserve it”

Emma and I were beyond exhausted due to the intense exercise but also to the incredible heat that had been plaguing Paris since we arrived. It was our first time at the Olympics. Emma and Val. Val and Emma. We have been the inseparable duo since we were 14 years old. It was the first day of high school when we both went to the secretary office to ask for the extracurricular sport lessons and when we both signed up for beach volleyball.

The rest was history. Two-time European Champions and current World Champions.

There’s been three days since we arrived at the French capital and so far the experience was being very nice. The Olympic village, despite of what we have heard from several athletes, wasn’t that bad. The beds’ structure was sure made of cardboard but the mattress was comfortable and sharing an “apartment” with other athletes wasn’t a problem for us. The food (of course not even a quarter as good as my mother’s) was up to our nutritional requirements and the chocolate muffins were to die for.

When the bus dropped us off the entrance of the village, we passed the control and we started our way to our apartment. Near to the Spain building we saw a considerable group of people running towards a guy wearing the Spain tracksuit.

“Are those athletes from…” I squeezed my sight trying to recognize their colors “The Netherlands?”

“I’m just trying to find out who they’re running to” Emma said grabbing my arm and dragging me closer to the scene.

“Emma, ​​you’re so nosy, stop it!” I pulled her away to keep our way through the sidewalk but she was way stronger than me so I just gave up.

Now that we were at a certain proximity, we could see that the group was taking a picture and when the athletes dispersed, we saw who was in the middle of the business.

“Of course it’s Carlitos” Emma, satisfied with the gossip, dragged me to our previous rute. “Everyone’s been following him since he arrived”

“First of all, how do you know that?” I raised my eyebrows wondering if she was part of the “stalking party”. “Second, can we blame them? He is one of the most amazing athletes now”

“I didn’t know you held Carlos in such a high esteem” she was the one to raise her eyebrow now but she just let it be.

--------------------------------------------------------

"Pau, watch out for the enemy jungler! They’re coming your way" Emma's focus was sharp as she called out.

Pau, clicking furiously, replied, "Got it! I’m on my way to cover mid. Just hold them off for a bit longer."

I was sitting nearby and occasionally glancing at the screen. A soft sigh escaped my lips unintentionally. The constant clacking of keyboards and the rapid-fire strategy talk were beginning to tire me. I had really tried to get into the game, but let's be honest, I wasn't very interested.

Seeing the intense concentration on my friends' faces, I decided it was time for a change of pace.

“Hey, I’m going for a walk. You two try not to eat the screen” I stood up, stretching a bit before going to the door.

“Sure thing! Don’t get lost!” Emma barely looked away from the screen.

“And don’t speak to strangers!” I heard Pau shouting when I was already outside in the hall and I couldn’t refrain a little laugh.

I already knew my way out almost by heart so in less than 2 minutes I was in the main avenue of the village. Some athletes with bicycles passed by me and I considered if I should take one, but I decided I should just walk around.

The ambience was always pretty dope and almost everybody that crossed gazes with me greeted me with some “hi” or “good afternoon”. The vibes of the athletes were just something else and I couldn’t even begin to describe how Iucky I was to witness all of this.

I had just reached a quiet corner of a very open space when I noticed a tennis ball rolling towards my feet.

“That’s weird” I thought

There weren’t any tennis courts inside the village. I bent down to catch the ball and looking up a little, I saw a figure coming over to retrieve it. Tanned skin, Nike shoes and jaw dropping thighs.

When I completely straightened, it took me a second to recognize him but my heart did a little flip on its own.

Carlos Alcaraz, looking as dashing as ever, right in front of me.

“Sorry about that!” he called out as he jogged over. His voice reaching my ears like a familiar melody and his accent rapidly taking me home.

“No problem” I replied handing it to him with my best smile. “Though I expected your aim to be a bit better, considering you’re a pro and all”.

 Why did my mouth have to be faster than my brain 80% of the time? I was hating myself right now. Although I obviously used a teasing tone, I didn’t know how he would take the joke.

Carlos laughed, a sound that made me feel bubbles all inside of me and sigh internally with relief.

“You’d think so, huh? I think I just got distracted by something”

My cheeks definitely turned red but with a playful glint in my eyes I said “Well, if I’m your excuse, then I’ll let it slide this time”

He raised an eyebrow, clearly showing that he enjoyed the fact that I responded to his subtle but effective flirting.

“And what about you? Beach volley, right? Valeria, current world champion”

“I feel flattered” I was genuinely surprised. The last thing I was expecting was him knowing who I was.

Carlos shrugged, his grin widening. “I’ve seen your highlights. You’re pretty impressive”

“Well, I’ll have to keep my game up then. Can’t disappoint you now”

He tilted his head slightly, studying me with a mix of curiosity and admiration. “I doubt you ever disappoint.”

By this point we were shamelessly flirting through our tone and our body language.

Carlos broke the silence, his smile turning a bit more mischievous. “You know, I’ve always wanted to try volleyball. Maybe you could show me a thing or two?”

I chuckled, crossing my arms as I repositioned myself grazing my arm with his intentionally. “I don’t know... I wouldn’t want to embarrass you in front of everyone.”

“Oh, so this is how it’s going to be?” Carlos feigned offense, though his eyes were bright with amusement. “Tell you what—how about a trade? You teach me volleyball, and I’ll give you a tennis lesson. We’ll see who embarrasses who”

“Deal. But only if you promise not to go easy on me.”

Oh God, that phrase just sounded so double meaning-like but he did not back down or react.

“Wouldn’t dream of it” he replied, offering his hand for me to shake. When I took it, his heat spread all over my body through my arm. He held on just a moment longer than necessary, his thumb brushing lightly over my knuckles before letting go.

As we walked back towards the Spain building, our conversation flowed effortlessly. We talked about our trainings, the excitement of the games but mostly, we learned the simple things about our lives. Beneath the light-hearted banter, there was a growing awareness of each other. A connection that we both felt in our core, as if we’d known each other in another life.

By the time we reached the common area, Carlos turned to me with a sweet but devilish at the same time smile. “So, when’s our first lesson?”

“You’ll have to work for it”

With a teasingly wink I ended our conversation and I left him watching me leave with an amusing smirk hanging on his lips.

[ms-snape]

I have a request but its totally up to you alright, if you wanna write it or not. I was hoping you could write a james x childhood bestfriend!reader fic where over the years in hogwarts they just have a fallout? Readers in love with james but james have the marauders and lily and she didn’t feel like he needed her so she moved on and found her own group of friends but reality, james felt exactly the same as reader? They meet again years later for work or smtg and it just felt right?

Request: just look up

Summary: Y/n and James fall apart but end up finding each other again

Warning: Jealousy, angst, insecure reader, blind james,fluff, happy ending, lily ad james doesn't get married, and peter is still a marauder

word count: 3320

A/N: This litteraly took me the whole night to write, cause it's my first request and i wanted it to be just perfect, and i'm not like a james stan so i didnt know how to write it properly without my inner Snape coming out but I really tried my best, the request is awesome and I loved the idea, hope u guys will like it <3

Masterlist

---

The sun hung low over the Hogwarts grounds, casting long shadows of the towering castle onto the emerald lawns. Y/N stood at the edge of the Quidditch pitch, her heart racing as she watched James Potter soar through the air, his laughter ringing out like music. The Marauders were at their usual practice, and she couldn’t help but feel a pang of longing for the boy who had once been her world.

"Y/N! Come join us!" Sirius Black called out, a broad grin plastered across his face. He waved his broomstick in the air, beckoning her over.

She shook her head, feeling the weight of her unspoken feelings settle heavily in her chest. "I’m fine here, thanks!" she shouted back, her voice barely masking the sorrow that had become so familiar.

James, spotting her from above, waved enthusiastically. “You’re missing out! This new move is epic!”

“Yeah, sure! Epic!” Y/N forced a smile, but inside, she felt the ache of a friendship that had splintered. Once, they had been inseparable, sharing secrets and dreams beneath the stars. Now, James had his friends—the Marauders—and Lily Evans, the girl who had stolen his heart.

As the practice continued, Y/N turned away, her gaze falling on the Forbidden Forest in the distance. Memories flooded back—bittersweet moments of laughter and joy, now tainted by the reality of their growing distance.

“Hey!” A voice broke through her reverie. It was Remus Lupin, his warm brown eyes sparkling with concern. “You alright?”

“Yeah, just… watching,” Y/N replied, forcing her gaze to stay on the ground. The last thing she wanted was for Remus to see the sadness in her eyes.

“James has really taken to Quidditch, hasn’t he?” Remus asked, glancing at the pitch. “He’s got talent.”

“Yeah,” she said softly, her throat tightening. “He’s amazing.”

“Want to talk about it?” Remus probed gently.

“No. I mean, yes! I mean—” Y/N took a deep breath, her frustration bubbling to the surface. “Can’t we just enjoy the moment? I don’t want to ruin it for anyone."

Remus nodded, his expression understanding. “Alright. Just know I’m here if you need to vent.”

“Thanks, Remus,” she muttered, grateful for his kindness. The Marauders were undeniably entertaining, but being around them felt like a constant reminder of what she had lost.

As the sun dipped below the horizon, the practice ended. James landed with a flourish, his face flushed with exhilaration. “Did you see that? I almost had the snitch!”

Sirius clapped him on the back, his laugh booming. “You’re a legend, mate! Lily won’t be able to resist you now!”

Y/N’s heart sank further at the mention of Lily. She turned to leave, but a voice stopped her.

“Y/N! Wait!” James called, jogging over, his hair tousled and carefree.

“What?” she asked, trying to sound casual but failing miserably.

“Are you joining us to the feast tonight?” He grinned, a flash of hope in his eyes.

“Uh…” She hesitated, glancing back at the pitch where the others were gathering. “I might… have plans.”

“Plans? With who?” James’s brow furrowed, a hint of concern creeping into his voice.

“Just promised… some friends to join them,” she replied, avoiding his gaze.

“Oh. Right. Friends.” He seemed disappointed but quickly masked it with a smile. “Well, it’s gonna be a great time. You should come!”

“Maybe,” she said, her heart twisting. “I’ll think about it.”

As she walked away, Y/N felt the familiar sting of loneliness. It was a feeling she had grown accustomed to, but it never got easier. The laughter of the Marauders faded behind her, replaced by the silence of her own thoughts.

The Great Hall buzzed with excitement that evening, the enchanted ceiling reflecting the starry night. Y/N sat at a table with her new friends, a group that had welcomed her after the rift with James widened. They laughed and chatted, but her mind was elsewhere.

“Y/N, earth to Y/N!” One of her friends, Maria , waved a hand in front of her face.

“Huh?” Y/N blinked, shaking herself from her thoughts.

“Where were you?” Maria asked, raising an eyebrow. “You’ve been staring at the marauders table for ages.”

“Just… thinking,” Y/N replied, forcing a smile.

“About what? That Potter kid?” Maria teased, nudging her playfully.

“Of course not,” Y/N snapped, then softened. “I mean, maybe a little. It’s hard to ignore him.”

“Why don’t you just tell him how you feel?” Maria suggested, her tone earnest.

“Because it doesn’t matter anymore,” Y/N said, bitterness creeping into her voice. “He’s with Lily now. He barely even knows I exist since he met her and his new friens .”

“No, that’s not true!” Maria insisted. “He waved at you earlier!”

“Yeah, like I’m some sort of ghost,” Y/N muttered, her heart heavy.

“Alright, enough with the pity party!” Maria exclaimed, her voice loud. “Let’s enjoy the feast!”

Y/N forced herself to join in, laughing at Maria’s antics. But every time she glanced at James, who was animatedly talking to Lily, her heart cracked a little more.

Days turned into weeks, and the distance between Y/N and James only grew. The Marauders had become a tight-knit group, while Y/N found solace in her new friends. But something felt incomplete—a piece of her heart remained tethered to a boy who had once been her best friend.

One afternoon, as the leaves turned golden and the air grew crisp, Y/N sat under a tree, sketching in her notebook. The vibrant colors of autumn surrounded her, yet she felt trapped in shades of gray.

“Hey there!” a voice interrupted her solitude. It was Peter, his round face beaming. “What are you up to?”

“Just doodling,” Y/N replied, glancing up at him. “What about you?”

“Nothing much, just trying to avoid the chaos of the Marauders,” he chuckled. “You know how they can be.”

“Yeah, I do,” she said, a wistful smile touching her lips.

“Want to join us? We’re going to the lake for a bit,” Peter offered.

“Sure, why not?” Y/N closed her notebook and stood up. As she walked with Peter toward the lake, she felt a sense of camaraderie that had been missing for so long.

When they arrived, the Marauders were already there, laughing and splashing water at each other. James, with his tousled hair and carefree smile, stood at the edge, tossing stones into the water.

“Y/N!” he called, his face lighting up. “Come join us!”

“Uh, maybe later, when i'll make sure that the giant squid won't drown me” she said, her heart racing. She felt exposed, like her feelings were laid bare for everyone to see.

“Don’t be a coward!” Sirius yelled, splashing water in her direction. “Get in here!”

Against her better judgment, she found herself laughing as she stepped closer. The warmth of friendship enveloped her, but every time she caught James’s eye, she felt that familiar ache.

“Let’s play a game!” Remus suggested, his voice cutting through the noise. “How about a round of water tag?”

“Yeah! I’m in!” James shouted, diving into the lake, laughter trailing behind him.

Y/N hesitated, but the thrill of the moment pulled her in. She joined the fray, splashing and running. Laughter echoed around her, but the moment James tagged Lily, pulling her into a playful embrace, Y/N felt her heart drop.

“Nice move, Prongs!” Sirius hollered, his eyes twinkling. “You’ve got her!”

“Thanks, Pads! I’m unstoppable!” James replied, his laughter ringing out like a triumphant bell.

Y/N stepped back, feeling the laughter fade as she watched them. She could never compete with that, she thought, turning away to hide the tears that threatened to spill.

“Y/N, wait!” Remus’s voice cut through her thoughts. He had noticed her retreat. “Where are you going?”

“I just need some air,” she said, her voice shaky. “I’m not feeling well.”

“Are you sure?” he asked, concern etched on his face. “You don’t have to leave.”

“I’ll be fine,” she insisted, forcing a smile that didn’t reach her eyes. “Just give me a moment.”

As she walked away, the laughter from the lake faded into the background. She sat on a bench near the castle, staring at the ground, trying to push away the storm of emotions inside her.

Weeks turned into months, and the rift between Y/N and James only deepened. The Marauders seemed to grow closer, while Y/N drifted further away, lost in her own world. The holidays approached, and with them, a sense of finality hung in the air.

One evening, as snow began to blanket the grounds, Y/N found herself wandering through the castle's corridors, lost in thought. She paused in front of a window, watching the snowflakes dance outside.

“Hey, Y/N!” a voice called, pulling her from her reverie.

It was James, striding toward her with an easy smile. She felt her heart flutter, but she quickly buried it.

“Hi,” she said, trying to sound casual.

“Nice night, huh?” he gestured to the snow, his breath visible in the cold air.

“Yeah, it is,” Y/N replied, her voice barely above a whisper.

“I haven’t seen you around much,” James continued, his tone more serious. “Is everything okay?”

Y/N’s heart ached at his concern, but she forced a smile. “I’ve just been busy, you know? Studying, hanging out with friends…”

“I miss you,” James said suddenly, his voice softening. “Things aren’t the same without you.”

She looked at him, her emotions threatening to overwhelm her. “I miss you too, James, but… things have changed. You’ve got your friends, your life, and I don’t want to be in the way.”

“You’re never in the way,” he insisted, stepping closer. “You’re my best friend, Y/N. That hasn’t changed.”

“But it has,” she whispered, tears welling in her eyes. “You’ve got Lily now and your new friends, and I’m… I’m just me.”

“Lily’s great,and the marauders too, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about you,” James said, his eyes searching hers.

Y/N shook her head, the tears finally spilling over. “It’s just… too hard, James. I care about you so much, but I don’t think I can keep pretending it doesn’t hurt to see you with her.”

“Y/N…” James’s voice broke, his face etched with guilt and sadness.

“I need to move on, James,” she said, her voice trembling. “I need to find my own happiness, even if it means letting go of our friendship.”

James opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. Instead, he reached out, pulling her into a tight embrace. Y/N felt her resolve crumble as she clung to him, tears soaking his sweater.

“Promise me you’ll still be my friend,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion.

“I promise,” she replied, her voice barely audible.

They stood there for what felt like an eternity, the snow outside falling silently, as if the world itself was holding its breath. When they finally pulled apart, Y/N felt a strange sense of peace, as if the weight on her heart had finally lifted.

“Take care of yourself, James Potter,” she said, her voice steady now.

“You take of your self, Y/N,” he replied,

As she walked away, Y/N felt a mixture of relief and sorrow. The bond between them had been fractured, but perhaps, in time, it would heal. For now, she needed to find her own path, even if it meant walking it alone.

The snow continued to fall, blanketing the castle in a soft, silent embrace, as Y/N disappeared into the night, ready to face whatever the future held.

---

The dim lights of the Muggle bar cast a warm glow over the wooden tables and the soft hum of conversations filled the air. Y/N sat at the bar, nursing a drink as she stared into the amber liquid. It had been years since she’d seen any of her old school friends, years since she’d felt that familiar mix of camaraderie and nostalgia that had defined her youth.

“Hey, Y/N!” a voice called out, breaking through her thoughts. She turned to see Sirius Black striding toward her, his trademark grin lighting up his face. “What are you doing here, all alone? Thought you might’ve turned into a statue.”

“Very funny, Sirius.” Y/N forced a smile, though her eyes betrayed her. “Just… reminiscing.”

“About what? The time James nearly got us all kicked out for trying to charm the jukebox?” Sirius chuckled, his laughter cutting through the bar's background noise.

Y/N’s heart twisted at the mention of James. He had always been the life of the party, the one with the infectious smile and mischievous glint in his eyes. But over the years, that image had become blurred, overshadowed by his friendships and his infatuation with Lily Evans. Now, James was nothing more than a bittersweet memory.

“Something like that,” she replied, her voice barely above a whisper.

Sirius studied her for a moment, his expression shifting from amusement to concern. “You okay? I know things were… complicated back in the day.”

“Yeah, complicated.” She laughed softly, the sound tinged with sadness. “I guess we all drifted apart. I found my own way, made some new friends, you know?”

“Right, right.” Sirius scratched the back of his neck, a hint of awkwardness creeping into his demeanor. “But you’re back now. That’s something, right?”

“Yeah.” She glanced around the bar, watching the flickering candles on the tables. “It feels different, though. Like everything’s changed.”

“Maybe we can change that,” he suggested, his voice brightening. “How about a little reunion? Just us, like old times?”

A lump formed in her throat. “I don’t know, Sirius. It’s been ages. What if—”

“What ifs don’t matter. Come on, it’ll be fun! I’ll even buy the first round.”

“Fine,” she relented, a small smile creeping onto her face. “But only if you promise not to get us thrown out.”

“Deal!” he laughed, and for a moment, the weight on her heart lightened.

The night of the reunion arrived, and the bar was more lively than usual. The usual background chatter was replaced by the sounds of laughter and clinking glasses. Y/N stood at the entrance, her heart racing as she spotted familiar faces around a table in the back.

“Look who finally decided to show up!” Peter exclaimed, waving her over.

“Glad to see you, Y/N!” Remus added, a kind smile on his face.

“Hey, everyone!” she replied, forcing enthusiasm into her voice. As she moved closer, her eyes caught on James. He looked older, more mature, but that same playful sparkle remained in his eyes.

“Y/N!” he called out, breaking into a grin that sent her heart fluttering. “You made it!”

“Of course,” she replied, her voice steadier than she felt. “Wouldn’t miss it.”

“Grab a drink!” Sirius nudged her toward the bar, and she complied, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness.

As they settled into conversation, Y/N found herself laughing and sharing stories, each moment pushing the past further behind her. Yet, every time her gaze drifted to James, the ache of lost time returned.

“Hey, you want to step outside for a bit?” James asked, interrupting her thoughts. “It’s getting a bit loud in here.”

“Sure,” she replied, her heart racing as they stepped out into the cool night air.

Once outside, the sounds of the bar faded, leaving them in the stillness of the night. Y/N glanced up at the stars, avoiding his gaze.

“So… how have you been?” he asked, his voice breaking the silence.

“Busy with work. You know how it is,” she replied, trying to keep her tone light. “And you? Still with Lily?”

James sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly. “Not anymore. We… we broke up.”

“Oh.” The word slipped from her lips before she could stop it. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.” He ran a hand through his hair, frustration etched on his face. “It was my fault, really. I couldn’t give her what she wanted. I thought… I thought I loved her, but I was just lost.”

“Lost?”

“Yeah.” He took a deep breath, his blue eyes searching hers. “I thought I needed to be with her to prove something. But I realized I was just pushing away the people who actually mattered to me—like you.”

A heavy silence fell again, and Y/N felt a whirlwind of emotions. “I moved on, James. I had to.”

“I know.” He shifted, looking pained. “But I missed you. We all did. I thought I could handle everything—our friendships, my relationship with Lily—but it just made me feel more alone.”

“We already had this conversation, about our friendship, we agreed on moving on James, it was mutual” she asked, her voice trembling slightly.

"I know, but I didnt want this " He stepped closer, his expression earnest. “I thought you were fine without me.”

“I was trying to be,” she admitted, her heart racing. “But I missed you too.”

The tension crackled between them, and Y/N felt a pull, like gravity drawing her closer to him. “James…”

“Y/N, I—” he started, but she interrupted.

“You were busy with your life. I didn’t want to be the one left behind.”

“Lily left me because she felt I didn’t love her,” he said, his voice low and heavy. “But I did. I just didn’t know how to show it. I’ve spent too long pretending.”

“Pretending?” she echoed.

“Pretending to be someone I thought everyone wanted me to be. But I’ve changed. I want to be honest, especially with you.”

The sincerity in his voice made her stomach flip. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I still care about you, Y/N. More than I thought possible. And I realize now that I’ve always loved you.”

Her breath caught in her throat. “James, I—”

“Please, let me finish.” He took a step closer, his gaze unwavering. “I don’t want to lose you again. I’ve spent so long regretting that fallout between us. I don’t want to pretend anymore, I love you Y/n”

Tears pricked at her eyes as she processed his words. “You mean it?”

“Every word,” he said, his voice steady. “I want to make this right.”

“I…love you too, and I want that too.” Her heart raced, a mix of hope and fear coursing through her. “But what if we just end up hurting each other again?”

“Then we’ll figure it out together,” he replied, determination in his voice. “I want to try. You mean too much to me.”

With a shaky breath, Y/N took a step toward him, closing the distance. “I’ve missed you, James. I thought I’d moved on, but I never really did.”

He reached for her hand, entwining their fingers. “Then let’s not waste any more time. We can start over.”

As they stood there, the world around them seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of them under the vast expanse of stars. The past had shaped them, but it wouldn’t define their future.

“Together?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

“Together,” he confirmed, his smile lighting up the night.

Months passed, and the impromptu reunion had ignited a spark that neither had anticipated. Y/N and James navigated their new relationship with care, each moment filled with laughter and discovery. They spent evenings exploring new places, sharing stories of old friends and lost dreams, rebuilding the bond that had once felt irreparably broken.

“I can’t believe we let so much time slip away,” James said one evening as they walked down a quiet street after dinner.

“Yeah, but maybe it was all part of the journey.” Y/N leaned against him, the warmth of his presence comforting. “We’re here now.”

“Right. And I won’t let you go again.” He wrapped an arm around her, pulling her closer.

As they walked together under the streetlights, Y/N smiled, feeling a sense of belonging that had eluded her for so long. The echoes of their past intertwined with the promise of a brighter future, and for the first time in years, she felt whole.

[sunshine-theseus]

Put Your Head On My Shoulder | Jessie Fleming x Reader

Words: 4k Summary: you and jessie go through many ups and downs but things work out in the end Warnings: angst, fluff, mentions of depression and taking medication for it, covid didn’t happen, pretending the game vs real madrid was at Stamford bridge not in Spain

Jessie Fleming and I met at the 2015 world cup, both freshly 17 and competing in our first big tournament. Despite the fact we didn’t play each other, I found myself stumbling into her on the sidelines of Canada’s game against The Netherlands. Words were exchanged but we didn’t see each other again until the next year.

We knew we were both on athletic scholarships for the Bruins at UCLA and promised to try and meet outside of training to keep in contact without sport. It was surprising however, when my box was knocked out of my hands as I crashed into the young Canadian, both of us trying to enter the same room. She was clearly struggling to see over her own stuff, stumbling over words as her cheeks flush a very familiar red, trying to apologise.

“J, if you say sorry one more time I’m asking for a new roommate. Which I had no idea we were until now.” I crouch to pick up my books and writing equipment that was in my box as Jessie tries to manoeuvre to her decided side of the room.

I give up and rush to help her when she stumbles over her own foot and nearly goes flying.

“Jessie! You’re going to break something before the season even starts Jesus Christ be careful!” my hands gripped her waist tightly to stop her from tilting forward, then I grab the top box so she can actually see. The same red blush covers her cheeks.

“Sorry, my mum just insisted I try to take all my stuff in as little trips as possible, which is proving to be difficult. I’m sorry about your books.” With her stuff firmly on the ground she finally looks as me.

“They put the Australian and the Canadian in the same room knowing we just basically kicked you out of the Olympics?”

“You did not!” the joke was rare coming from her. She was funny and kind but still rather serious and shy, preferring studying statistics and players over team bonding or spending time with people after a game.

I understood that, I felt that, and that’s how we worked. Us against the world. We trusted our team and confided in them, but we’d really only want each other in times of need. Obviously there were people like Sam or Christine, who were like our big sisters for our respective national teams, but Jessie and I were just drawn to each other.

-

After UCLA came Chelsea. Both of us were about to start our last year of uni when her offer came through, far before mine.

By this point we’d been inseparable for four years, so I worried we’d be split; her making the move to England and me stuck in our dorm. Except it’d be much emptier and lonely, or filled with some stranger’s things.

And it was just like that. Time zones caused issues with keeping in contact. Eventually that became other things. Study, because she still had to finish her course. Team bonding, practice. What would be a call once a day became once a week until it filtered out, and her texts would be answered in seconds while mine sat in wait for whenever she decided she was free.

My offer came in the January transfer window. Emma had been in contact with me for a couple months, clearly trying to convince me, and 6 months ago I wouldn’t have even thought about it. But when I stare at the ‘merry Christmas’ and ‘I got the offer’ messages left unread and think about seeing the girl I thought would never leave me, I take the time offered.

And a week later I find myself sliding into Sam’s spare room groaning into the pillow as she fusses over the Australian snacks I did manage to get through customs.

“What’s got you in a mood chickadee?” I feel the bed dip beside me and her hand rubs my back.

“J.” the older Australian lets out a hum before taking a moment to reply.

“She talks about you all the time. About how much she misses you and everything you got up to at uni. All of which I already know because I hear it every camp.” I can feel the joking eye roll despite not seeing it.

“She talks about me but doesn’t talk to me. That means nothing. And I know she’s busy but so was I. Just because I was captaining a university team instead a stupid professional team doesn’t mean I wasn’t busy or doing something important! And I still kept in contact!” by now I’ve rolled over onto my back and started fiddling with Sam’s tattooed fingers, trying to distract myself from the pit of loneliness and despair that’s been slowly eating my stomach.

I dare not mention to anyone the decline in my mental health or the required psychology sessions Emma was going to provide for me once every few weeks. Everyone knew I was sad and that’s all they needed to know. But once upon a time, Jessie would have known everything, holding my hand tightly the whole way.

“You should sleep, big first day tomorrow. I’ll make you breakfast. Alarm-”

“8:30, I know. Every day, same time. Thank you Sam, really.” She smiles and pats my head before leaving.

-

To say my first day didn’t go well would be somewhat of an understatement. At exactly 8:30 my alarm went off. At 8:32, the pill bottle rattling at the bottom of my bag was fished out and 1 was being washed down by water. At 8:43, Sam was banging on my door calling for breakfast and I was rushing to make sure the pill bottle was hidden after changing. No one needs to know I’m taking anti-depressants, including Sam.

When we pulled into Cobham, I started to feel sick, and I told Sam just that.

“I’ll catch a train home.”

“It’s just nerves, you’ll be fine.”

“No-”

“You stay until at least lunch time, then we’ll see.” A pointed finger is shoved into my face, but I begin to stroll alongside her anyway.

I do almost book it for the nearest train station as soon as I enter the locker room. Sitting in the cubby next to mine, tying her shoelaces, is Jessie Fleming. During the chaos of the move and my first day, I manage to forget the way our numbers are right beside each other.

“You’ll be okay. You don’t even have to talk to her.” Sam whispers as she makes her way to her own cubby, greeting people on her way through.

So I try. Placing my bag in the nook and beginning to change into my training kit without the Canadian even looking up. It’s when I place down the same styled Tiempo Legend 8s I’ve been wearing since they released, that I can see her head turn from the corner of my eye. I don’t acknowledge it, continuing to slide the boots onto my feet and tie them up. But that doesn’t stop her.

“Oh my god! Hey!” there’s a lightness in her voice that I used to be so familiar with and it makes my heart clench.

I take a moment before deciding replying would be too rude for my liking.

“Hi.” Short and simple, and quite blunt.

“I didn’t know you signed, or that you even got the offe-” forget being nice.

“You would’ve known if you bothered to keep in contact with me.” With that I slide out of my seat beside her and make my way to Sam.

-

It gets worse when Emma splits us into pairs for dribbling drills, and she slides me toward Jessie.

“Of course.” I sigh but accept my fate as a ball rolls our way.

“What’s wrong?” a phrase that, coming from her mouth, used to have me spilling every small emotion I was feeling.

“Doesn’t matter.”

“Come on Beans, tell me.” The nickname had been created in our first year of university. She learnt I loved green beans and I’m rather tall, so the name fit. But she didn’t feel like the same person who I let make the funny name.

“You don’t get to call me that anymore.”

“What? Because I moved?”

“No! You left for Chelsea and I was happy for you, we had a plan to stay in contact until I followed along to somewhere in England. But you stopped trying. You stopped answering. You left me alone when I needed you the most. I would’ve done anything for you to have the career you deserved but you got it, without me. I just thought I’d still have my best friend when it happened.”

To say that training was tense from then on wasn’t a stretch. Emma never paired us up and any time one of us entered the locker room, everyone else would wait in silence for a burst similar to the one on the pitch. It never came.

It was after my first session with the psychologist that things began to change.

Because the psych was only here for me, Emma was kind to lend her office to us for the 50 minutes while she did other work around the grounds. I assume the girls were grateful to escape the tension for the moment.

“Same time, 2 weeks from now! It’s good you’re making progress!” The rather lovely lady shouts just as I’m closing the door, waving and smiling in thanks.

But as I turn around, I nearly bump into a small figure. A rather familiar one at that. Jessie begins to fall backwards but I grip her waist, holding her in place. It’s a familiar scenario, the feeling of my hands on her waist and her burning red cheeks are something I struggled to ever forget.

“T-thanks” her cheeks burn that same red.

“No worries.” I mumble in reply as I remove my hands, taking a step back.

“Who were you talking to? That didn’t sound like Emma. And what are you making progress on?” the questions don’t come rapidly but I still struggle to process them. Jessie’s smart, she can put two and two together, so I should tell her. But what if she laughs? There was a time where the thought wouldn’t have even crossed my mind, she’s not that type of girl. But things change.

“I- I-” Jessie places a gentle hand on my arm and nods, confirming it’s okay to take my time, but please continue. I sigh.

“She’s a psychologist.”

“A sport psychologist?”

“Well yes and no. I… I’ve been diagnosed with depression, and Emma wants me to have someone professional to talk to.” Her grip tightens but I know it’s in concern.

“When- when did you…”

“A couple months ago. Don’t worry, it wasn’t just because of you, a lot of things happened.”

“But it was partially because of me. I wasn’t there for you when I should’ve been. You’ve always been there for me and I got here and treated you like shit. Discarded you like you were nothing. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” tears well up in her whisky brown eyes, but I smile.

“J, if you say sorry one more time, I’m asking for a new roommate for the away match against Man City. Which I did know we are… for once.”

“You can’t just forgive me.”

“I’m not, it’ll take time, but I want my best friend back. Sprout.” Jessie charges forward and wraps her arms around my waist.

“I’d do anything.” Her voice is muffled as her head presses into my chest, but I smile.

~~~~~

Things changed once again a few months after that. The 2020 Olympics had been delayed due to natural disasters, but we still found ourselves milling around the Olympic village together in our very little spare time. I also found myself admiring her for every little thing, every detail. Eventually I had to admit to myself that I’d developed a crush on the girl.

“What’s going on in that busy brain of yours?” Jessie had been by my side every step of the way with my mental health after she found out, and this question wasn’t uncommon, but the answer would be.

“I know this could ruin things, I’m very aware of that, but I have to tell you now otherwise I don’t think I’ll ever have the courage to.” Gaging her reaction was difficult, Jessie was a very stoic person.

“I-, I’ve found myself growing feelings for you. Feelings that surpass best friends, or how I feel when you show up for me. I like you, a lot. And I need you to know that. Standing in the middle of a pathway surrounded by half naked athletes in Olympic Village, I like you.” I look her in the eyes. Those burnt umber eyes, so warm and comforting, that always draw me in.

“I really like you too. Everything about you. I want to care for you and be there when you need me. I want to wake up in your arms and be able to admire every feature as the sun beams down on you like the miracle you are. I would even go as far as saying I desperately want to be your girlfriend.” I barely let Jessie finish what she’s saying before I lean down, a significant way, and kiss her with everything in me.

~~~~~

2 and a half years later and Jessie hasn’t left my side since. Most of our quarrels are just that, silly fights that are solved by the end of the night. We moved in together after 3 months and were rarely been seen apart.

That included tough games.

Real Madrid was our first game of the Champion’s League season, and we knew it was going to be hard. They were physical most importantly, so we had to play to that. We knew that when we were up 2-1 in the 78th minute.

“Jessie Fleming challenges Athenea Del Castillo, barley missing the ball and clipping Athenea on the foot! Oh, and the ref is calling for a penalty. I’m certain first contact was outside the box.” Is what would be heard by anyone watching the match through a screen, but you didn’t need a commentator to know the ref made an unfair call.

The contact was clearly outside the box and yet we’re forced to line up and watch Olga Carmona take the wrongly rewarded shot, me grasping Jessie’s hand in my own as a way to reassure her.

It’s obvious the referees are against us when Niamh makes a shot on goal, the ball sliding in, but it’s claimed offside. Something to do with Sam supposedly messing with the defence, another false claim. There’s nothing we can do when the final whistle blows and we’re tied, all of us dropping to the ground in exhaustion and disappointment.

After shaking hands with the Madrid players and briefly talking with Hayley to catch up and talk about things that happened between our last camp and now, I travel toward Jessie.

My girlfriend stands solemnly with her head in her hands. I managed to pull them away momentarily to see the tears drifting down her cheeks, but she’s pulling her hands away and turning around before I can ask what’s wrong.

“Darl, it’s not you’re fault.” I don’t want to invade her space while she’s upset so I walk around her and simply stand, hoping she’ll reach for me.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Jess-”

“Leave me alone Y/n.” not another word is uttered as she turns toward Fran and Niamh and walks away from me.

I similarly turn to Sam and Erin, with a shocked look, jaw hanging and rejected tears looming on my water line.

“She probably just needs to be alone.” As Erin tries to comfort me, we all turn to look at the subject of the conversation, only to see her being comforted by Fran, Niamh and Ashley, despite her effort to insist she’s fine.

“Maybe I didn’t push hard enough?”

“No you should never push when they clearly need space.” Sam places a reassuring hand on my shoulder

“But why is it only me she needs space from? I’m supposed to be the one she seeks comfort in. That’s what girlfriends do.”

“I don’t know chickadee.”

-

I expect Jessie to already be back at our apartment by the time Erin drops me off. Our shared car had been taken from the parking lot at the stadium and Jessie had disappeared, so those dots connected themselves. But our designated parking space is empty as I stroll along the bitumen.

There are no familiar white shoes next to the door in the same exact spot she puts them every day, no kit bag hanging on a hook, waiting to be washed tomorrow. No Canadian waiting in our bed, curled up in one of my already oversized shirts or hoodies and shorts, begging me to hold her.

I try not to worry when I call her and she doesn’t pick up. Maybe she went the long way and there was traffic? So I call Niamh to ask her if she knows where Jessie went. She doesn’t have an answer. Then I try Fran, and Zecira, and even Emma.

I ask everyone to try and call her too, Sam offering to take Kristie and search every corner of London, Erin offering the same. It’s midnight by the time I give up trying to contact her, asking Aggie if I could borrow her car tomorrow to look around if she wasn’t back, her living down the road from us. The young forward is insistent on joining me if it comes to it.

When I wake up the next morning and find Jessie curled up against me, in one of my hoodies and shorts, relief washes over me. Her brown curls are messy, her soft pink lips cracked open to allow air into her lungs. The sun trickles in through the curtain and lights up her face, freckles looking like bursts of light against her skin. Her eyes are still puffy from last night and tears have dried upon her cheeks, and I can’t resist the urge to reach up and lightly wipe them away.

As my thumb drags across her tan skin, tracing her face, her eyes flutter open, and I remember how easy it is to get lost in them. So warm and inviting.

“Mornin’ honey.” I press a gentle kiss to her nose, her cheeks, her forehead and her eyelids.

“I’m sorry for last night. I just felt horrible, if only I didn’t make the tackle.”

“I know darl, but that’s what I’m here for. I love you, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you yeah? I was bloody worried though.” Jessie nestles her head into the crook of my neck and nods, pressing her own kisses on any skin she could reach.

I wrap my arms around her and pull her up until she’s laying on my chest instead. My cold hands sneak under her hoodie and she jumps from the shock, swatting at my hands beneath the fabric.

“I reckon I make us some tea and brekkie and then we can do whatever you want all day. How’s that sound?” I flip us over so Jessie can go back to sleep for a while, but she clings onto me, pulling me down aggressively by the front of my old Chelsea travel shirt. Her lips press against mine with energy and love and I get caught up in the feeling. A moan slips past someone’s lips, which of us I’m not quite sure, but I slowly pull away, trailing kisses down her neck until I reach her collar bone.

“Let’s save that energy for later yeah?” I swiftly wink as I finally roll off the bed.

-

I’m making scrambled eggs when I feel Jessie’s arms wrap around my waist. She presses soft kisses across my back as I sway us back and forth to the slow jazz song spewing from the record player.

The next song comes on and I abandon the meal completely, turning off the stove and twisting myself in Jessie’s hold so I can face her. I take one of her hands in mine and rest the other on her waist, her spare landing on my shoulder.

“Put your head on my shoulder; Hold me in your arms, baby” the lyrics continue as we follow along, her head resting against my chest, my chin balanced on top. We dance slowly through the kitchen, the music carrying throughout the house.

As the song finishes, I dip Jessie, leaning over her as her leg kicks out. My gaze flickers between her eyes and her lips and within seconds I’m kissing her again, still in the dip. When I pull her back up, she jumps into my arms and pulls my lips to meet hers for more, the force making me stumble back into the counter behind me.

“I want to slow dance with you around our house when we’re old and can barely kick a ball anymore. Our kids and grandkids playing around while it just feels like the two of us. Because it’s always been the two off us and I never want that to change.” Jessie whispers against my lips. My heart clenches with love as I take her in.

“Will you marry me?” The words escape both our lips almost in complete synchrony. I almost drop her, but my grip on her thighs upholds as I kiss her again, and again, until I can’t kiss her anymore.

-

“I stole this video from Y/n’s phone not long after Jessie and her broke the news of their engagement. Y/n had texted me that morning saying she wanted ideas for a ‘day in the life of a woman in love’ video she planned on making that very day, and I knew that she would have forgotten all about the phone while she and the love of her life shared a special memory together.” Sam takes a pause to look at Jessie and I, sitting side by side at the front of the room.

“What isn’t shown in the video, is the ring that was sitting in the pocket of Yn’s shorts, waiting to be place on the only hand it was made for. The ring went with her everywhere for at least a month before this cute dance proposal. Every day in training, Y/n would tell me a new plan she had come up with to ask Jessie to marry her, and I always told her ‘you should do it when the moment feels right. Don’t force it.’, as I clearly had experience with this sort of thing… And she told me that was a bunch of absolute bullshit.” Our friends and family laugh while my wife’s face drops in shock, her elbow lightly nudging my side. I let out a snicker and kiss her cheek, wiping off the lipstick residue that is left behind.

“Well it turns out I was right. As always. And I’m honoured to be standing here as a best woman in front of two of my best friends, the most amazing young players out there, two people who were made for each other; sculpted by the stars and the earth, to be in each other’s lives, celebrating that love. You’ve both overcome a lot, personally and as a couple, you deserve this love.” A tear escapes my eye as I stand to hug Sam.

“Now can the two nerds please make their way to the dance floor for their first dance?” I take Jessie’s hand in mine and pull her along.

Her suit coat is left on the back of my chair and her waistcoat is unbuttoned and she looks fucking good. Her hair rests on her shoulders and her slack pants fit perfectly around her thighs. Jessie holds part of my dress train, so we don’t trip as we hold each other in similar fashion to the day that led to this, the same song playing on the large speakers in each corner of the room.

“Put your head on my shoulder Whisper in my ear, baby Words I want to hear, tell me Tell me that you love me too”.

Jessie stands on her tippy toes, my heels not helping our height difference.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

[gummydummy19]

Movie night

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Natasha Romanoff x male reader

Summary: The boys catch their girl getting an early start on movie night and it makes the night take an interesting turn.

Content Warnings: Threesome, smut, dom/sub dynamics, watching porn, squirting, P/V sex, mentions of anal

A/N: I'm genuinely ashamed at how long this took me to write... thank you @hauntedkittenfun for the request and the incredible patience lol

Word Count: 2800+

You were out with Steve, walking around the grocery store looking for snacks. Tonight was movie night. It was a tradition Steve and Natasha had for years and when you joined the Avengers, it didn't take long before they invited you to join. The three of you were basically inseparable. Always goofing around together, flirting and teasing.

'Found it! Steve chirped, dropping two big bags of popcorn in the shopping cart you were pushing.

'Great, I think that's about it' you said, scanning the cart to make sure you had everything.

The both of you loaded your shopping bags in the car and drove back to the compound.

You glanced over at Steve who was sitting in the passenger seat, looking all pretty.

'Hey, eyes on the road,' he joked

'Aye aye, captain,' you grinned back

When you arrived home, you expected Nat to come out and help you put the groceries away, but she was nowhere to be found.

You had agreed to watch the movie in the living room since that room had the biggest TV. So that's where you decided to look first.

'Do you...do you hear something?' Steve mumbled halfway down the hall.

'No...what do you hear?' you asked Steve, knowing his super hearing never let him down.

'I...uhm...' there was an undeniable blush creeping up Steve's cheeks, and quite frankly...it was adorable.

You raised your brow, curious at what he was hearing, so you walked closer to his door.

As you got closer to the living room, you started hearing it too. Soft moans combined with high-pitched ones.

It couldn't be? Right?

Well, only one way to find out. Your hand moved faster than your brain as you threw open the door, catching Nat in the middle of the couch with her hand between her legs, watching a very...interesting piece of film.

"That's not the movie we agreed on missy," you grinned.

Steve stood behind you red as a tomato and very quiet.

“I thought I had more time before you guys came home...” Nat pouted. She didn't look embarrassed at all. It was almost like she wanted to get caught...

'Is that so?' you teased, 'Well, don't let us spoil your fun...'

'Want me to keep going?' she asked innocently

'Hmm...' you dared.

'Only if you guys join me...'

You raised your brow again, only a tiny bit surprised at her request.

'What do you think, Stevie?' you asked, looking slightly over your shoulder.

He was a mess already. His cock had been straining against his pants since he heard the sounds from the hallway.

You backed up a bit into him, letting your ass rub slightly against his bulge as you tangled your fingers in his hair.

'Should we join her?'

You slowly guided Steve to the couch with you. You could tell he was having trouble deciding where to look; you, Nat, or the girl wantonly pounding her own pussy with a considerably large sex toy on the television.

The decision was made quite rapidly when said girl suddenly let out a particularly loud moan. The three of you simultaneously turned your heads toward the screen, just in time to catch the girl squirt all over her bed.

'Christ...' Steve nervously mumbled, 'there's no way that's real...'

It was Natasha's turn to raise her brow, as she gave Steve a curious look.

'Sure it is, Stevie...why wouldn't it be real?'

'It's just...it's so...I just don't buy.' He stated

'Steve, I'm telling you it's real, I swear. It's called squirting.' she explained

'Oh yeah? Well...prove it then.' He dared, clearly gaining a bit more confidence as his brain turned to full on horny-mode

'Yeah? Want me to show you?' she drawled

'Hmm...'

Natasha wasted no time in turning off the TV and placing herself down in the middle of the coffee table.

You and Steve plopped down on the couch, watching Natasha as she started teasing her fingers up and down her folds before sliding two of them inside her pussy in one swift motion.

She had been playing with herself for quite some time before she got caught and it had left her wetter than ever.

The sight of her with her legs spread and her head thrown back is better than any porn video you'd ever seen. You couldn't help but slide your hand down to your crotch, squeezing your bulge.

'You can't do it, Nat.' Steve taunted, trying to keep his voice steady.

fucking brat, you thought.

'O-oh no?...' she moaned, speeding up her movements.

Barely a couple seconds later she let wailed out as she started squirting so hard you felt your dick twitch, making you groan.

You looked over to Steve and noticed his face was a little wet...

'That's what you get for calling me a liar...' Nat mumbled cheekily, making you chuckle.

'Look at that, Stevie, Nat's not the only one who is wet anymore...' you laughed, pressing a kiss against his cheek to sneak a taste.

'I wanna see that again...' was all that Steve said before getting on his knees in front of Nat.

'Hey, don't get greedy...sharing is caring, Stevie,' you pouted, taking a seat next to him as he gave you a warm smile.

'You're right...' he mumbled, pulling you closer, 'C'mere...'

Steve pressed a needy kiss to your lips as you felt his big hands rub all over your crotch, making you groan in his mouth.

'Can you...?' he questioned, glancing over to Natasha's glistening pussy. 'You're better at this...show me how to do it...'

God. How could anyone ever say no to him?

Your eyes moved from Steve's pleading gaze to Nat's desperate one.

'Can I?' you checked, although you were pretty sure what the answer was gonna be.

'Please...' she whined, wiggling her hips a little.

'Open up,' you told Steve before gently putting two of your fingers into his greedy mouth. He sucked on them eagerly, making your cock twitch again.

'Take my cock out,' you commanded, 'but keep your eyes on her pussy, you don't wanna miss anything now do you, Stevie?'

'No, Sir' he whispered after he released your fingers, moving quickly to do as he was told.

You rubbed your spit-covered fingers over Nat’s clit first, making her shudder.

'See that, that's a very important spot when you wanna make her cum,' you explained as Steve took out your throbbing cock.

'But we don't wanna wear her out too soon, do we?' you taunted, letting your finger slide down a bit before stopping at her dripping hole.

'No, we wanna get her a little desperate first...' your finger teased around her entrance.

You looked at Steve to see his eyes glued on Natasha's pussy just like you told him to, all while he kept stroking your cock perfectly.

'Good boy, Stevie...' you praised lowly, 'now this next part is very important...'

You slowly pushed both fingers inside of her, immediately curling them up against that sensitive, spongy spot, making her whine and buck her hips a bit.

'Theeerree we go...' you chuckled, moving your fingers a little.

'This spot right here, Stevie....that's a very important one when you wanna make her squirt...'

Natasha moaned louder as you kept pumping your fingers inside of her. You slowly picked up the pace, hitting her spot a bit rougher each time.

'Feel that pressure build, baby?' you looked at Nat.

'Yeah...fuck...oh...' she whined, throwing her head back again.

Your free hand reached down to stop Steve's movements. You brought his hand up to your mouth and sucked his fingers

'Still watching, Stevie? The next part is gonna be really fun...' you groaned as you felt his grip tighten on your cock.

All he could do was nod furiously as he watched you move even quicker. Natasha let out another loud moan and before you knew it she was squirting again.

'That's a good fucking girl,' you groaned.

Steve had halted his movements. Too mesmerized to focus on jerking you off.

When Nat blinked her eyes back open she noticed both you and Steve and a couple drops on your shirts and faces.

She let out a tired giggle, hiding her face in embarrassing as she let herself lay back on the coffee table.

‘Oh my god…’ she mumbles with her hands still covering her face. ‘I wanna apologize but technically it’s really not my fault…’

'Hmm...don't be embarrassed, baby' you chuckle, hungrily licking your fingers clean. 'Tastes even sweeter than the popcorn...'

"I wanna try..." Steve mumbled, pushing your hand away to make room for his own.

Nat immediately moans at the touch, her eyes rolling to the back of her head as Steve stuffs his large fingers in her pussy.

'M'sensitive, Stevie...' she whines.

'Yeah? What if I find that special spot, huh? Is it sensitive there?' he taunted, his demeanor switching from subby to dominant in an instant as he wiggled his fingers a bit, immediately hitting the spot he was talking about.

Natasha keened in response, arching her back off the table as she squirted again.

'Fuccckkk!!' she whined as Steve moved his other hand to press on her lower belly, stretching out his thumb to rub circles over her swollen clit.

'SHIT I'M CUMMING! DADDY!' she screamed out, squirting even harder than before.

Steve fingered her through her orgasm with the smuggest of smiles before pulling his fingers out of her.

He was going to lick them clean, but you grabbed his hand and put his fingers in your own mouth instead, moaning as you tastes Nat's wetness.

'Don't forget who's in charge here, baby.' you teased before pulling him in for a dirty kiss.

'Lay down.' You commanded him and he happily obliged, wiggling off his jeans in the process.

You turned to Nat, who was just starting to come back to her senses before you kissed her breathless again.

'Get on top of him.'

'Yes sir...' she said with a smile, eagerly obliging just like Steve.

The second Natasha sinks down on his dick, Steve enters his dominant mode again, grinning at her as she struggled to take his cock.

'There you go...take all of me.' Steve groaned, guiding Nat down on his cock with his hands on her hips.

Nat huffed out a breath as she adjusted to his size, planting her palms against Steve's broad chest as she slowly started to bounce up and down on his cock.

Steve allowed her to have her fun.

For a minute...

'My turn now, sweetheart.' he smirked as he grabbed her shoulders, pulling her down on his cock as he started pounding into her.

Hard.

It didn't take long for her to squirt again all over his cock and stomach, making her moan out as she did so.

'Look at that, Stevie. You're turning our girl into a damn water fountain,' you joked as you watched him pound into her, stroking your cock as you observed.

Hearing you call her 'your girl' made Natasha's stomach flip. If it wasn't for Steve holding her up, she would have toppled over as another orgasm coursed through her body.

Steve really put his super soldier stamina to good use, pounding into her with no signs of stopping.

'Shit, shit, S-Steveee....' Nat whined, trying to push her hands against his stomach to get him to slow down.

'P-please, please stop, please...' she begged until he finally let up with a big grin plastered on his face.

'Too much?' he chuckled as she dropped her head to his neck, trying to catch her breath.

'Hmm...' she mumbled, unable to speak, making him chuckle again before he pressed a kiss in her hair.

'You okay?' you asked, sitting closer to the two of them as you gently rubbed up and down her back.

'Yeah...more than okay,' Nat smiled shyly.

God, she was so fucking gorgeous.

'Okay enough for another round?' you smirked

Her grin told you all you needed to know and you wasted no time in helping her off Steve's lap.

'Holy fuck...' Steve chuckled, finally admiring all the wetness that covered his body. 'how do you even squirt that much?'

'Well, I don't know...just kinda happens when you have a huge cock ramming into your g-spot over and over again...' she joked, making Steve throw you a smug look.

'Yeah yeah, keep smiling like that, Stevie. I bet you I can make her squirt harder.' you teased, crawling on top of Nat as she laid back on the floor.

'You're just talking shit, dude.' Steve shot back

'Oh yeah? Let's see who can make her squirt the most then.'

'Deal.'

You started pounding into Nat again almost immediately. The three of you went at it for hours. Leaving not only Natasha but the entire living room a mess.

'There we go....give me another one...' you groaned, making Nat squirt for the 6th time, 'good fucking girl...'

A few messy kisses later, Steve was pumping into her from behind, making her drip all over the carpet, groaning all kinds of filthy stuff in her ears.

It was kinda hot seeing him get all dominant with her, knowing he got all subby for you in the blink of an eye.

'What was that now, huh? Number 10? Number 11?' Steve taunted.

Nat was a blubbering mess. Mascara streaked down her cheeks as she giggled through the tears, all blissed out.

'I...I don't...just...uh...I-' she tried to string a sentence together but to no avail.

'My turn again.' You grinned, flipper her over so you were lying on top of her as you slid your throbbing cock into her abused hole.

You leaned down to kiss her, slow and passionate as you picked up the pace a little, making her whine.

'Need to cum...gonna let me cum in that fucked out pussy of yours?' you groaned, grinning when she nodded a bit too fast.

'Please...fill me, Daddy...need it so bad."

After basically edging yourself for yours, it didn't take long before you blew your load into Nat's pussy, letting your head drop against her shoulder, relishing in the way she ran her nails over your scalp.

'fuck....that was...jesus christ...' you huffed out, trying to catch your breath.

'Hmmm...' she smiled sweetly

'I think I lost track tho...Stevie, do you remember how many times that was?'

'M'not sure....maybe we should start over' he grinned, causing Natasha to throw the nearest pillow to his face.

'Next time we can check to see who out of the two of you can cum the most…I wonder if you will still laugh as much then'

'Okay okay...m'sorry...' you chuckled, pressing a kiss to her forehead before pulling out.

As you moved to lay down next to Nat, Steve got a full view of Natasha's open legs. Watching as your cum leaked out of her made his eyes twinkle.

'See something you like?' Nat giggled, seeing how Steve licked his lips as he stared at her cunt like it was his favorite snack on the planet.

'Hmm...lay back, princess....just let me have one more taste...' he mumbled before attaching his lips to her stuffed hole.

'Fuck...Steve....' She moaned while he ate her out with vigor.

Nat was too caught up to notice, but you didn't miss Steve bucking his hips into the pillow you threw at him earling as he whined at your taste leaking out of Nat's pussy.

Soon he stuffed two of his think fingers inside her, pressing that sensitive spot one more time.

'Just give me a last one...just one more...' he moaned, attaching his lips to her pussy as he fingered her.

Nat trembled as she came hard, squirting right into Steve's mouth while he groaned loudly, bucking his hips into the pillow fervently, covering it in his cum.

'fuck,' Steve groaned out, the blush on his cheeks increasing by the second.

'U okay there, Stevie?' you teased, making him hide his face in embarrassment.

'Shit...that was not how that was supposed to go down...' he explained, 'It was just so hot, and it tasted so fucking good....'

You laughed at Steve's adorable embarrassed face, pulling them both close to you on the large couch.

'Are you guys okay?' you asked earnestly as they snuggled up to you

'Hmm...' It sounded from both sides before silence took over for a minute.

'I definitely won, tho' you stated smugly, anticipating Steve's reaction.

'The hell you did!' he shot up, making you laugh

'Maybe we need a rematch sometime…' Natasha weighed in, making you both turn to her with a hopeful look

'You wanna do this with us again?' You asked

Your heart lit up a little when she gave you an adorable nod, snuggling close to you again.

'That was the best sex of my life...and besides...I've had a crush on you guys for months...' she admitted.

'Y-You...You have?' Steve studdered.

'Yeah....I was hoping you would walk in on me earlier...'

'I'm glad we did.' You promised, relishing in the feeling of your two favorite people snuggled up to you, warm and satisfied.

Taglist;

@metalbuckaroo @princessayveke @montsepliego @scxrletrecsmarvel @hopelesslyrogers @eclecticpatrolroadlawyer @tfandtws @vicmc624 @ahahafudge @enchantedbarnes @wickedravyn @pono-pura-vida @amayaraestyles @matchat3a @fictional-hooman @sebastianexplicit @peaches1958 @avengersfan25 @jamneuromain @tryingtoliveonmywishes @mrsevans90 @daybreak96 @tiredqueen73 @fallingforunrealisticromance @identity2212 @randomweirdoss @ragamuffin285 @juliaorpll78 @geralts-yenn @imjusthereforliam @bangtanstoeart @squeezyvalkyrie @enchantedbytomandhenry @superduckmilkshake @kingliam2019 @bascmve01 @missgaygurl @foxyjwls007 @mollymal

[lizzie-is-here]

lonely is a man without love

part i- the mission

“and i say to myself: a moon will rise from my darkness.” - mahmoud darwish

summary: you’re an ex-black widow, assigned to observe marc spector. instead, you find steven grant

wordcount: 1.4k

warnings: language, violence, idk british people?

a/n: and so it begins again :)))) this series won’t be very long, but i’m gonna have fun with a black widow reader. if you’d like to be added to the taglist, feel free to ask! love you, hope you enjoy! <3333

taglist: @thefictionalgemini @ravenz-hope

series masterlist | next part

“Britain? Come on, Rogers, seriously?”

You groan as you throw the file down on the kitchen counter. After several months of recovering from all of the shit with the Blip, Thanos, Tony’s recovery, and catching up after being fucking dust for five years, you finally got to go back on missions.

And they send you to fucking. Britain. London, to be more specific.

“Steve, the food is absolute shit. They eat like they’re still rationing their food for the war,” you rant. The man raises a brow at the mention of his past, but shrugs.

“It’s something easy to start you back up. We can’t send you guns blazing into space.” He sets a yogurt bowl and some fruit in front of you. “Eat your breakfast.”

You roll your eyes, thanking him as you grab the food. “Thanks, grandpa.” You flip through the file. “Who’s the mark?”

“Not a mark, a target,” Nat corrects.

You shrug. “Same thing.”

“He’s some vigilante called Marc Spector,” she says without looking up from her phone. She’s texting Yelena, no doubt. Likely planning the younger girl’s visit. You haven’t seen her since your own escape from the Red Room, but you’re more than thrilled to meet up.

The two of you had been inseparable, even with Dreykov’s strict rule. And now that Nat had gotten into contact with her again, it was only a matter of time before you got together to cause trouble.

And make mac and cheese. ‘Lena made really good mac and cheese.

“He used to be in the Army, but went AWOL and started working as a merc,” she continues. “Seems enhanced.”

Shoveling the yogurt into your mouth, you narrow your eyes. “So is this, like, a ‘Clint-style-recruitment’ situation or a ‘beat-his-ass’ situation?”

Steve hesitates, considering the question. “Uh, depends. Entirely up to you.”

“Great, you’re very prepared.” You set the bowls in the sink. “So, how long until I fly out?”

———————————————————————

You’re good at your job. Amazing, really. And you know it.

Of course you are. The Red Room didn’t make second-bests, and you’d been cycled through three separate times. You and Yelena headed missions, racked up kills, and obliterated organizations with ease.

When Nat had destroyed the Red Room back in 2016 and Yelena, Alexei, and Melina had left to free the other widows, the redhead offered you a place with the Avengers. You weren’t stupid, so you’d accepted.

Then you’d disappeared in Wakanda and woken up five years later.

This was very jarring (no shit), so the team had ordered a 3-month recovery for anyone who had been dusted.

No one else seemed very enthusiastic to get back to missions, but you were.

So, when you touch down in a bustling airport, you send the jet back to the compound, grab your ID, and sling your bag over your shoulder. TSA lets you by with ease, despite the absurd amount of weapons you have, and you work on blending in with the crowd until you can reach your rented motorcycle.

Your Russian accent makes it a bit hard, but you manage a convincing enough Cockney accent to slip under the radar.

Now to find the target. Your coordinates lead you to a small apartment building (you will NOT call them flats), and a fake enough smile and forged documents gets you a flat one floor above the target room.

Huffing as you unpack, you set out countless guns, knives, and weapons that would really suck to be killed by. A loud thump resonates from the floor.

You slip one gun into your waistband and a knife in your boot before listening closely. Annoyed British mumbling follows.

“Oh, jeez, I’ve gotta clean up. This is such a mess…”

That doesn’t sound like a mercenary. Maybe he’ll surprise you, you suppose.

You sneak down the stairs, finding the correct apartment and raising your hand to the door. A quick but effective knock later, the door opens.

“Uh, hi?” The guy is cute. A bit disheveled, but when you peer inside his home, you see no weapons, no signs of a violent hobby.

“Hi,” you greet, bouncing on the balls of your feet. “My name is (Y/N), I just moved into the apartment upstairs. Figured I’d greet my new neighbors.”

He looks shocked. “Oh, I didn’t know we were getting any new residents. It’s nice to meet you.” You notice that his accent seems a bit… off. “I’m sorry if I’m not the most quiet neighbor. I’ve got a sleep disorder.”

You nod, noting his posture and how close he holds his hands to his body. He notices your silence and jumps.

“Oh, God, I’m sorry, I’m Steven Grant. I work at the London Museum.”

Luckily, the team took enough precedence to give you a fake job. After explaining that you worked from home doing digital marketing, you exchange goodbyes and head back upstairs.

“Ах, дерьмо [Ah, shit],” you sigh, collapsing on the bed. Yes, you’re thrilled to be back in the game, but this?

This was a waiting game, not a hunt-down-a-target-and-snipe-them-from-the-roof kind of game.

And you’ve never been patient.

———————————————————————

It’s a long month, even with Steven becoming your sort-of friend. You’ve scouted out his routine, polished your weapons, and even kept some muggers off his tail.

After visiting him at the museum, you’ve discovered his passion for Egyptology. He knows more than the guides, but is confined to the souvenir shop by his asshole boss.

You offer to kill her, only half joking, and he declines. It’s a shame.

But you’re starting to think he’s the wrong guy.

He lacks any basic survival skills, much less any fighting prowess. A dude held him at knifepoint and he gave him his wallet and phone. Luckily, you’d been just around the corner to grab the guy and knock him on his ass with little fuss.

“Holy shit, how’d you do that?” Steven had asked, gratefully taking back his things. The thief had booked it after you’d judo-flipped him and tugged his arm hard enough to dislocate.

“Do what?” you’d asked, watching him laugh.

He had waved a hand down the street. “Beat that guy up! You were flipping everywhere, and-“

It was your turn to laugh. “I did lots of martial arts as a kid. Good to know they’re coming in handy.”

It’s not a lie. Not really.

Despite Steven’s apparent innocence, you’re still suspicious. There’s always noise in the apartment below you, and the door will open and slam shut at odd hours. When you inquire about it, your target/friend (it’s complicated) claims to have no idea.

Except he’s telling the truth. You know when someone’s lying to you. You’ve never been wrong. And Steven isn’t lying.

He really doesn’t know anything about the sounds from his own flat.

One day, you’re sitting at your table with mac and cheese and polishing your favorite knife, when the door below you shuts. A voice comes up from the floorboards, like it does so often.

Instead of Steven’s fishy British accent talking to himself about Egypt or his goldfish, something else comes up.

That’s a Chicago accent.

You shove a gun into the waistband of your sweatpants, hurrying down the stairs. Without hesitation, you pick the lock and kick open the door.

Clicking the safety off of your gun and gripping it with both hands, you step in the apartment.

“Shit,” you whisper, real accent slipping through as you revert to your training.

You clear the main room of the apartment, methodical and precise.

A sound comes from the bathroom and you see the familiar figure. Hiding your gun, you sigh in relief.

You lean against the wall. “Sorry, I thought someone else was in-“

The man whips around, clearly shocked you’re there. He grabs a knife.

Oh, shit.

When he lunges forward, you dodge, grab his wrist, elbow his shoulder to loosen his grip, and grab the tactical knife. With a flick of the wrist, you lodge it in the door you just picked.

“Who are you?” the man demands, readying his fists. He looks like Steven, but acts like the complete opposite.

His posture is confident, tall. He glares at you through the sweat and blood on his face.

“My name is (Y/N), I know Steven?” The man sighs, annoyed.

“Great. Fucking great, now there’s a civilian involved.” You don’t bother to correct him.

You wave your hands around. “Well, who are you? Why are you from Chicago?”

“Why are you Russian?”

“I asked first!”

“Fine, fine.” He raises his hands in surrender. “I’m Marc. Spector.”

Your target. The file scrolls through your mind. Ex-Marine, high ranking. Went AWOL and reportedly killed a whole team of archeologists and researchers. Born March 9, 1987. Not dusted. Suspected enhanced, unknown powers.

This just got a lot more complicated.

[melanieph321]

Ruben Dias/Trent Alexander Arnold x Reader - Dark Rivarly Part 1/15

Yeah, y'all ain't ready.

Don't even think you're ready cuz you're not.

Part 2 and 3 are already out on my Patreon for FREE!

Reader is Trent Alexander Arnold's twin sister. The two have been inseparable since childbirth, more so now when Reader is fresh out of university looking for a job, crashing at her brother's place whilst doing so. One day Reader gets a job offer that she cannot refuse, however it would mean working for her brother's biggest rival in football, Ruben Dias. 

Enjoy!

"Y/N!"

It was six in the morning and Trent was already shouting.

"Y/N!"

You groaned, grabbing a pillow and smothering it against your ears. His footsteps emerged from down the hall and just like when you were kids, he had no respect for your privacy.

"Y/N, did you take my....."

He yanked the door open to the sight of you pretending to be asleep. He gasped, seeing you wear his Liverpool knee socks.

"I knew it, you fucking..."

Or to you they were knee socks, perfect for sleeping in.

"Hey?"

You twisted in bed, kicking your feet as you were suddenly being attacked.

"Aha. I knew you were bluffing." Trent exclaimed, and continued yanking the socks off your feet. "How about you buy your own clothes rather than stealing mine?"

"Why would I do that when you wear the same size as a girl?"

Trent got the socks off your feet, however your words made his cheeks grow red.

"How about you stop treating my closet like a fucking shopping mall you homeless parasite!" He stormed out of the room to the sound of your laughter. You had definitely struck a nerve.

"Technically, I'm not homeless. I'm job hunting." You said, after getting out of bed, entering the kitchen to make yourself some breakfast. Trent was washing the dishes, using the running water as an excuse to ignore you.

"I promise to be out of here once I get a job."

"And when will that be?" He muttered, shutting off the water. "You can't be job hunting for five years Y/N. How about we call it for what it is."

"Which is?"

His smile was spiteful. "Unemployment."

You pout your lips. "You're very mean whenever you have a game coming up, did you know that?"

He rolled his eyes, setting up the plates to dry. You watched him gather his things, getting ready to leave for the day. His team had a light training session ahead of their game tonight.

"Grandma will be at the train station at twelve." He informed. "Are you picking her up or should I give mom and dad a call, tell them to do it?"

"I'll do it." You nodded.

"Cool thanks."

"In one condition...."

He had turned around, reaching for the door handle. He sighed having to face you again, knowing damn well that whatever was about to come out of your mouth was not going to be to his benefit.

"What?"

"I'm going to need the keys to the Bentley."

"For what? To pick up Granny?"

You shrugged. "Take it or leave it."

Trent muttered under his breath, reaching for the keys in his pocket. It was amusing, seeing him give in so easily. The perks of being two minutes older than him. Technically you were twins, but on paper you were also his big sister.

He tossed you the keys.

"Have a nice day." You smiled.

He ignored you, slamming the door on his way out.

The silence that followed was soothing. Outside the sun was shining and you could simply feel it, the start of a wonderful day.

********************************************

"Grandma please, we're gonna be late. You don't need another Chanel bag."

You had spent all day tending to her needs. When the time came, getting your high maintenance grandmother to the football stadium was nearly impossible.

"You're late." Your patients said, stating the obvious as the two of you arrived at Anfield.

"Well, blame Grandma. She forgot to pack her scarf so we got her a new one, but of course the whole day then turned into a shopping spree."

Grandma was a retired seamstress, who still tended to a few shops where she lived in Manchester. Nevertheless fashion was her passion, some of it having rubbed off on you, however not as much that would make you run late to an inter-city football derby.

"How is Trent doing?" You asked,  searching for him out on the pitch. You spotted him in seconds, enjoying the fact that he looked cooked already. The game had only been running for twenty five minutes.

"Manchester City looks to be a real challenge this year." Your dad said.

"Good." You muttered.

Ever since you were a kid you had the habit of rooting for whichever team that Trent wasn't rooting for, especially if the game was shown on the TV, and his team was losing. Liverpool seemed to be losing big today. Their coach was seen gesticulating vividly on the sidelines, shouting at the players to get their shit together.

"What's he doing?"

At some point a fight broke out and you were grinning at the fact that Trent was involved. They'd usually have him somewhere in the back, playing on the right side of the pitch, during this game however, he was seen running around in the middle getting into more trouble than he should.

"What's he doing, ref!!" Your dad stood up and shouted in protest, along with other fans in the stands. It looked to be some of the City boys giving Trent trouble after a fair but hard tackle that he made on one of the younger players on their team. There was one guy in particular that seemed to be all up in Trent's face, shouting at him, deliberately giving him shit. At one point Trent must have had enough because he ended up shoving the guy, to little effect however because the guy was huge and immovable. Nevertheless, it was all downhill from that, Trent ended up getting booked by the referee and his coach must have decided it would be best to send him off quite early into the second half of the match. It was safe to say that Trent wasn't happy when your family returned home.

"It was that dickhead Dias fault." He snapped, having slammed every door that he had stumbled upon on his way through the house to the living room.

"Please Trent, it's just a game." Your mother said, trying to calm him down.

"Yes but why was I the only one that got sent off? The referee didn't even bother to book any of the City players that came at me. You saw it, didn't you Dad?"

"I saw it son. We all did. It was complete bollocks."

You snorted.

Trent frowned. "What's so funny?"

You shrugged. "I dunno, maybe when you tried shoving that guy but ended up falling back yourself. That was pretty funny."

"Y/N." Your parents sighed. Grandma however, slapped her knee as her head tossed back with her laughter, fueling your own.

"Oh, so this is funny to you?" Trent stood, his expression trembling with rage. "How about I shove you and then let's see who's laughing."

"Trent!"

Your parents held him back, nevertheless you didn't even flinch. Everyone knew that out of the two of you Trent couldn't fight.

"Y/N, apologize to your brother. He's had a rough day." Your mother demanded.

"So? It's a part of life. Sometimes we get booked, sometimes we don't."

"You think you're so funny." Trent said,  through gritted teeth. "Let's see who gets the last laugh."

A jolt of your heart. "You wouldn't."

He smirked. "Mom, Dad, Y/N has been lying to you about her internship in London."

"What do you mean?" They frowned. Even Grandma looked unsure.

"Trent." You warned him.

He ignored you.

"She's been unemployed for five years, crashing on people's couches. Her university friends must have gotten tired of her because she's been living with me for the past three months, eating my food, stealing my socks. She's never even offered to help pay rent.

"You didn't."

Trent was the only person in the room with a smile on his face, your parents on the other hand....

Part 2 and 3 are already out on my Patreon for FREE!

[lottiembae]

𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒍; shauna shipman x fem!reader

Summary: in which y/n and shauna make a plan to make jackie and lottie jealous.

Warnings: modern!era, fluff, angst. all characters are 18.

Note: English is not my first language.

"So, you agree?" Y/N asked Shauna, a hint of hope in her tone.

Shauna moves nervously on her chair. She looks briefly to where Jackie is talking with Mari, wearing her usual kind smile. The brown eyed girl sighed, looking back at Y/N.

"If they don't like us? Then what?" Shauna whispered, fear approaching on her eyes.

Y/N put a hand on hers and brushed her thumb on her palm, reassuring her. "Then we need to move on." She said, trying to hide her own fear. "It's our last year here, Shau. We need to make a move."

"It is a big move." Shauna ironically whispered, gaining a protest from her friend. "Alright, I'm in. But how are we going to do it? We need a solid history, say the same dates, how it started..." The brunette shut up when Y/N shushed her gently.

"Don't worry about it. We can plan it this week and next one, we can officially be out." Y/N says convinced.

"Okay." Shauna agrees, not sure about it but decides to take the risk and stay with the doubt.

The next few days, Y/N and Shauna plan all in the library. Since Shauna is in the football team and Y/N does not, it makes it a little difficult because the brunette felt bad later to do it. She calls Y/N and tries to persuade her, in vain because her friend wanted to do it. After all, it is Shauna's fault for introducing Lottie at her. Since that happened, Y/N felt immediately attracted to the tall and charming brunette and if like destiny wanted to make it worse for her, they are in the same theatre club. Y/N knew Lottie was taking extracurricular activities for her notes to count.

Just like they agree, they put on the plan on Monday. Shauna and Y/N entered high school hand by hand, maybe it is not a big deal, friends do that after all. But there are times when you know it more than a friendship way. And it happens with Y/N and Shauna.

All eyes were on them to every step they got inside. Shauna bit her lower lip, nervous and avoiding their gazes, she focused her grip on her sweaty hand on Y/N's.

"What the fuck!?" A voice makes them stop on their tracks. Shauna swallowed, recognising who it is. The new couple turned to look at a shocked Jackie, her arms open and her eyes almost popping out from their orbits.

Shauna looks at Y/N, searching for some help. Y/N squeezes her hand and takes a breath, smiling kindly to the hazel eyed girl.

"Hi, Jackie! Why do you look so surprised?" Y/N asks casually, receiving a squeeze from Shauna in a signal for her to be careful with Jackie, she advised about not to fool with her.

Jackie opened her mouth and closed it a few times, her eyes narrowed. Her eyes fixed on their intertwined hands. A whistle breaks the moment, Nat and Van coming with teasing smirk plastered on their faces.

"I'm not gonna lie, I didn't see it coming." Van commented, approaching them throwing their arms around the couple.

Natalie looked carefully at her captain, holding a laugh. "You good?" Jackie blinked a few times and looked at her, changing her surprise expression for a mad one.

"Amazingly." She muttered, slapping with her shoulder on Nat's and going away from there. The dyed blonde snort, making a loud sarcastic comment.

"I think I miss something." Lottie murmured behind Natalie, just like Jackie her eyes fixed on their intertwined hands.

Before Y/N could say something, the bell indicates the start of the classes. Lottie excused herself and went to her first period. Natalie smirked at them and followed Lottie. Van kissed their cheeks and ran to their class.

"I think it went well." Y/N said.

Shauna looks at her with a raised eyebrow.

•••

The next few days, the tension was palpable. Y/N and Shauna were inseparable to accord with their plan. Jackie at first gave them a weird look and went away, then she proceeded to do snark comments at Shauna. However Lottie is affected by their relationship, she didn't show it. She even protects them from Jackie, who can't believe her for not supporting her.

A day after they finished the training, Taissa, Nat, Van and Shauna were the last ones in the changing room. The brunette was taking a short shower before she went to Y/N's house, Taissa was looking at her while she brushed her hair, a skeptical expression plastered on her face.

"Are you and her in a relationship?" Taissa question. Van came quickly scolding at their girlfriend. "C'mon Van, it's weird that they start dating. We would come see it, and Shauna giving Jackie's heart eyes didn't help. So...?" Taissa inquired, crossing her arms.

Shauna flinched, her cheeks turning red. Not for feeling ashamed or almost she will be caught. It's for Taissa questioning and making assumptions that she didn't need to remark.

"I'm sorry, Shauna. Don't pay attention to her." Van tried to apologise for Taissa. Shauna appreciates it, but she knows Taissa doesn't.

From a distance Natalie saw how Shauna is restraining from snap at their friend. The brunette isn't a conflicted person, but there are times where if the person she cares about is being targeted, Shauna will defend them to whoever tried to do it in her presence.

"The only thing I see is them together, all the time holding hands. They are doing great, but then...," Taissa explains, making her point. "They never kissed in front of us!"

Van spoke loudly to shut up her but it was late, Shauna let her brush down and directed towards the brown eyed girl. "Are you saying this stupid thing only because we didn't kiss in front of you?" She licked her lips, letting out a dry laugh. "Let me tell you that we didn't prove to you all anything. If I kiss my girlfriend in front of you or not it's about our concern, not you Taissa! So the next time you have a better explanation, don't talk to me." Shauna grabs her backpack and storms out from there.

Natalie and Van looked at Taissa, seeing immediately the regret painted on her features. "You deserve that." Nat muttered, grabbing her backpack and going out.

Taissa looks at Van. "Are you mad too?" She asks in a weak voice.

"I tried to stop you. Of course you didn't hear and then it blew on your face, like always." Van said disappointed, copying her friend's steps and going from there.

Taissa cursed, she needed to apologise with Shauna. With luck maybe this time Jackie isn't mad at her for damaging the dynamic team.

***

Shauna turned off the car, stepping out and closing the door with a loud slam. She walks fast towards the front door, knocking a few times. She hides her mood when Y/N's mom opens the door, a warm smile on her lips.

"Welcome back, Shauna! Y/N is upstairs." Shauna thanked her. She quit her shoes and went to the bedroom, opening it a little with force startling the person inside.

"What happened?" Y/N asks when saw Shauna, her pronouns frown delate her. Shauna went to her bed, laying down. The other was there doing her homework. "Shauna! Take it easy." She reprimands her gently.

"Taissa doesn't believe our relationship." The brunette lowly said, losing the expression Y/N made. "And I have a discussion with her." She sighed, turning aside and watching you.

"What did you say?" Y/N asked, scared.

"She accused us of not kissing in front of them. I just pointed out that we didn't need to do it for them to believe us." Y/N gives her a sweet smile, caressing her palm.

"For a moment I thought you would screw it up." Shauna rolled her eyes, Y/N giggling for her behaviour. "But you surprised me, Shauna Shipman."

"It's one of my many charms." Shauna teases her.

•••

When Jackie finds out about the fight, she controls her temper and in a kind voice makes Taissa to apologise with Shauna.

"Did she really do that?" Y/N asked astonish, used to Jackie's reaction with them.

Shauna nods, rolling her eyes in a knowing manner. "I know someone talked with her before. She was warned beforehand."

Y/N nods thinking about it. "Maybe. After all she is the captain of the team." She brings a hand to Shauna's shoulder, squeezing it affectionately. "Everything okay?"

The brown eyed girl looked around the pitch, and a sigh escaped from her lips. "Yes. I'm just tired." Shauna murmurs, hiding a yawn. She just finished the practice and is sitting on the bench with Y/N, telling her about what happened.

"We can go. You need to finish that project and I need to babysit my brother." Y/N said, standing up. A confused thought crossed her mind, making her turn to look at Shauna. "Wait, Jackie always went with you..."

"I think Lottie is taking my place now..." Shauna lowly said, standing up too and putting a hand on her jacket pocket.

Y/N hummed, seeing the tired expression on her face. "How lucky she is." Shauna rolled her eyes at the comment, but a small smile approached her mouth.

"Do you think that if I come with you, your parents would be mad at me?" Shauna shyly asked, looking at the path.

"I don't think so. Actually they love you. They think you are a very good influence." Y/N said, a hint of smugness in the last comment. Shauna looks at her with raised eyebrows. "It's true, Shipman. So if you want to come you are welcome." She said now with a sincere smile, approaching her car.

Shauna nods, biting her lower lip. "I follow you then." She said smiling. "Also you are cooking, right?"

Y/N rolled her eyes playful. "Yeah, wife." A tiny smile approached when Shauna beamed a little at her answer, something unusual on the reserved girl. When she stationed her car outside her house, she waited for Shauna, who looked a little distressed when she came out but understood it when saw her walking with her phone on her ear.

"Fine! I need to go," Shauna muttered, a thin line on her lips. "Yeah, I'm with her. It's my girlfriend if you don't remember. I know, but when you were with Jeff didn't matter, right? You know what? See you tomorrow." She hung up and let out a piss sound, cursing under her breath.

"Let's go inside." Y/N said, not asking who it was even if she has a vague idea. She misses when Shauna softens her gaze while a calm involves her senses, forgetting about the call.

The brunette follows her, going inside when Y/N puts aside to let her in. Shauna felt a little embarrassed and the feeling that she is trespassing their parents' truths. It dissipates a little when Hugh, Y/N's little brother runs towards her and not Y/N.

"Alright! I changed my mind, Shipman. Get out." She faked being offended by Hugh's preferences.

Shauna snort. "Hey, little man! I think I'm going to babysit you and your sister tonight." She played along, this time Y/N threw her a cushion making her let out a loud snort while she grabbed it easily with a hand. "You missed."

"Yeah, I will say the same thing when you are hungry." Y/N hummed back, walking to the kitchen to grab a water bottle. Shauna pouted, oblivious to it. She guides Hugh to where her sister went and grab the bottle she is tending at her, thanking. "Give me your backpack, it will let it in my room."

After their parents exclaimed happy greetings to Shauna, they went to enjoy their date night. Y/N keep an eye on Hugh while both girls do their respective projects. The brown eyed girl let her pen on top of the table and let out a satisfying sigh, she finishes it. Shauna stretches her arms out and looks at Hugh, who is entertained by an animated film. Then, her eyes wondered towards Y/N, on her concentrated face, and how she kept biting her bottom lip while writing. Shauna put aside her head, watching her carefully. She is sitting on the floor to let Y/N have the couch for herself while all her homework is scattered around.

Her dream state came to a stop when her belly made a loud sound, making her blush. "I'm guessing that is my cue to do the dinner." Y/N murmurs, chuckling lowly while letting her pencil and catch the embarrassment look Shauna is giving.

Shauna helped Y/N do the dinner, watching Hugh when the other is busy cooking or cutting a vegetable. After they finished, Shauna insisted on cleaning up the dirty dishes while Y/N took Hugh to the bathroom to brush his teeth and go to his bed. Then, when they did their job, they decided to put on a film while Y/N's parents came back, Shauna doesn't like the idea of letting them two alone, so she waited even if Y/N offered her to go.

At some point, Shauna felt her eyes were heavy and let her head fall on Y/N's shoulder. She wrapped more of the blanket they are using to her body. Y/N kept her laugh and watched Shauna silently, her eyes fully closed while her feet were on the table, soft snores were slipping from her mouth. Y/N grabs her phone and takes some photos of her, smiling to herself.

And when Y/N's parents came back, they glared at them sleeping on the couch with the TV off. The same thing Y/N did with Shauna, now her mother is taking a photo of them sleeping together, Y/N's head on top of Shauna.

•••

Today is the first match of October and the first one since Y/N and Shauna got in a 'relationship'. Shauna's eyes travelled unconsciously towards the bleachers where Y/N is sitting, showing support towards the team and especially at her. Her brown eyes softened when they met hers, she raised a hand briefly to her and kept warming up, a silly smile on her lips.

"Keep focused on the match, do you? We need you." Natalie said behind her in a teasing manner.

Shauna snorted. "Like always." She retorted, kicking the ball to the goalkeeper, winking at her blonde friend when she scored and jogged to the other side.

When she spots her next drill, Lottie is there. She saw how the tall brunette stole a few glances towards the bleachers and then smiled at Shauna. "Hey, I hope you are in the mood. Someone needs it." She greeted her softly.

Shauna chuckles quietly, it's been a whole month since they announced their relationship and where the ambiance in the changing room changes too. She knew that Lottie had feelings for Y/N, she said to her a lot of times, but Y/N didn't believe her. Then, her fake girlfriend said the same thing about Jackie, neither Shauna believed her, that's why they are using their brilliant plan.

"How is she?" Shauna questioned softly, looking where their captain is.

Lottie let out a sigh. "She is getting better. She needs time." The brunette murmured, squeezing her arm. Shauna nods. It's getting on her nerves that Jackie acted like she was the victim when Shauna or Y/N didn't do anything. But she is grateful that Lottie is helping her, when well, Jackie is one of the stubborn people she knows. A few minutes later they returned to the changing room to put on their kits, their coach gave them a motivational speech, his eyes longing in Shauna, Taissa and Jackie, passing the word to the captain.

Jackie cleared her throat and gathered them together. "I don't care if some of us don't stand the other, right now it will change. We need to be a team now, someone you know what to do without doubt if your teammate would fail at you," her eyes linger on Shauna, licking her lips. "we are going to destroy them and scale to the finals!" She put her hand in the centre, a firm look on her eyes. Jackie knew it wasn't the best words, but mentally she felt a little exhausted. Lottie swallowed and put hers on top of Jackie palm, soon the rest followed her.

Maybe the words Jackie's used on them are working or not, but they are playing very well compared with other previous matches. Taissa scored the first goal in the 10th minute, it brings a new aura between them. Also the cheers coming from the bleachers gave them hope. They have a lot of opportunities, the ball resisting goes into the goal.

In the 42nd minute, Natalie stole the ball quickly from the rival and raised her head to see what she could do. She passed the ball at Taissa and then sprinted up, Taissa feint to midfielder approaching her and passed the ball to Lottie. The tall brunette covers it and gives a quick pass to Jackie, who feint a defender and thinking faster she has two options: kick the ball and with luck it goes through the goalkeeper's fingers and scores or passes the ball to Shauna, who is alone and can score it cleanly.

Jackie lets her proud aside, and passes the ball at Shauna before the defenders detect her. The brown eyed girl replied immediately and kicked the ball, holding her breath until the ball went into the net. The people on the bleachers stood up, cheering. Shauna breathes again when someone from behind jumps on her back, she lets out a chuckle, muffled by her teammates. Jackie hugged briefly at her, turning on heels quickly and going to her position. Shauna's eyes let Jackie's figure and wonder towards the bleachers, spotting Y/N cheering loudly, clapping and a big grin on her face, a smile that matches the sun.

Shit, the only thing Shauna is thinking right now is go there and smash her lips on hers. Resigned from to can't go there, she gifted her with a smile.

•••

"You shined out there." Y/N giggled when Shauna walked towards her. She wraps her arms around her neck and kisses her cheek gently.

Shauna instinctively wraps her arms around her waist, both hands resting there. She felt how Y/N caressed her nape, it was an easy access since she has hair in a messy bun. "It's luck. We all played well." She murmurs, used to Y/N's affection.

Y/N separated a little to glare at her with a knowing look. "For one, you need to take the compliment."

"Lovebirds! This evening there is a party, I count with you two." Natalie came, not caring to overstep on their bubble and wrap both arms around them.

"I'm not sure, Nat. Maybe they want to celebrate it in an intimate way." Van smugly said behind them.

Shauna saw Y/N's flustered cheeks and how she hides her head on her neck, feeling the warmth from her cheek press there. "Shut up! We are going there, after all I give us the win." Even if she is blushing too, her comment made Nat and Van whistle.

"That's my girl!" The blonde complimented her and squeezed her shoulder, doing the same with Y/N and marched away with Van.

"I guess I have plans now..." Y/N hummed, coming out from her hiding place.

Shauna grabs her hand and walks towards her car. "I follow your advice, I hope you notice it." She loves the sound escaping from Y/N's mouth and how her eyes are half closed for it.

Y/N stayed in her house to prepare herself while she went to her house with the promise to go for her to go together to the party. Shauna opted to put on a dress, even if she wanted to go with jeans, but she wanted to impress you and don't know why. She let her hair down, applied light make up and grabbed her denim jacket. She texted her to let know she is on her way.

When Shauna parked outside she stayed in her car, waiting for Y/N. Meantime she scrolled for Instagram, she used not to use it, but sometimes she entered the app. The first photo approaching was one from Jackie. They all gathered celebrating after they won the match that afternoon, she swapped and the second photo was only her, a mirror photo. Typically of her. She presses the heart and moves her thumb up, a silly smile when saw Y/N's post. It's a photo from last year, Shauna let her team jacket at her, an arm around her waist while Y/N had theirs wrapped on her neck, her cheek press on hers and a big grin on her face while Shauna has a lipped smile on.

When she liked the post, she pressed the people who liked it. She isn't surprised when saw Lottie's name or the rest of her friends, however she is surprised when saw jackietayloryj approaches from the users.

"Sorry! I was reassuring my dad that I will come to the accord hour." Y/N interrupted her stupor. She got into the passenger seat and put on the seatbelt.

Shauna blocked her phone and gazed at her. She felt how dry her mouth felt, her eyes scanning the outfit she is wearing. "You look beautiful." She whispers, red creeping on both cheeks.

Y/N turned to look at her and saw how Shauna was gazing at her, her mouth lightly open. She let out a soft chuckle. "Thank you very much, Shauna. You look beautiful too, that dress favours your eyes." This comment, the yellowjackets' player blush more, advertising her eyes from her and thanking Y/N, she started the engine and put direction to the woods, an old tradition where the parties celebrate.

There were a lot of people when Shauna parked the car. Loud music is heard, people chatting animatedly and when Shauna walks near them, they start to chant her name, making her feel a little uncomfortable but nodding with her head for their support. Y/N giggles by her side, holding her arm.

"I'm going for a beer, you want water, right?" Y/N asked, letting out her hand from Shauna's arm and when she nodded, the girl went to the barrel.

"How are you feeling about being a total winner today?" Van walked behind her, throwing an arm around her shoulder. Shauna rolled her eyes when saw a smirk playing on her lips. "By the way, Y/N looks beautiful." She said mindlessly, but when saw how Shauna raised an eyebrow, the redhead cleared her throat and rectified. "I mean, she always looks beautiful. But I don't know, today she is extra beautiful and sexy." She blushes, her freckles stand up from her red cheeks.

"You are worsening it." Shauna smugly said, for once glad to see Van like this.

They walk where Taissa and Mari are, after what happened with her and the Turner girl, Shauna was a little resentful for it, but Y/N convinced her to forgive Taissa.

"Hey." Tai greets her with a relaxed smile. Van wraps around her hip and pecks her cheek.

Shauna nodded with a smile too. She engaged in a conversation with the three until her eyes spotted Y/N and Lottie talking. She frowned, the hands turning into fists on her pockets and tightening. She felt the necessity to go there and kiss Y/N until they couldn't breathe. The kind smile directed towards Lottie was making her pissed, it didn't help that the brunette copied her and put a hand on Y/N's forearm.

Mari apologised and went with Akilah, the silence made Taissa see what Shauna was so interested in. She holds a snort, instead she nudges Van gently, pointing with her head in the direction when the redhead looks at her questioning. Her blue eyes rolled and gave Taissa a warning look, for her luck Y/N started to walk towards them, leaving the Matthews girl talking with a random guy behind, but Van could see how Lottie followed Y/N's path.

"Hey, guys! Sorry it took me so long. I was chatting with Lot." Y/N said with an innocent smile, tending the water cup to Shauna, who grabbed it with a thin line on her lips and quietly thanked her, sipping from the red cup. "That first goal was amazing!" She said at Taissa.

Taissa's eyes lit up and thanked her, a soft shadow of pink on her cheeks. Van smirked when she noticed it, but remained quiet. For sure later she could tease her girlfriend. Meanwhile Taissa mentally scolded herself for doubting their relationship, even if she still believes it's fake she has no right to criticise it.

When Van and Taissa started their usual bickering, Y/N turned to Shauna who stayed quiet the whole time, a hand in her denim jacket and the other holding her red cup, her eyes travelling for the place.

She wraps both arms around her neck, holding now her beer with her two hands from behind Shauna's head and carefully tries not to hit her with it. "Something happened?" She questioned her in ear.

Shauna bit her lip and shook her head, noticing how her breath hit her cheek, how her deep perfumes' smell hit her nostrils, how the few freckles showed on her uncovered shoulder. And how her lips caressed said cheek to affectionately deposit a kiss.

Unwrapping her arms from her neck, Y/N grabs the hand she saved in her pocket and kindly guides her to a clear where there are no people. Then, taking a sip from her beer her back leaned on a tree, scanning Shauna's face. Her brain stopped the moment a soft breeze moves in slow motion her hair, her red lipstick on her plum lips illuminating from an angle emphasising the colour, just like her eyes.

Before Y/N could question her again, Shauna threw her empty cup to the ground and smashed her mouth on hers, her right hand finding a place on her hip while her left on her cheek. It's a little messy and brief, panic raising in Shauna inside when she realised what she did and the stunned face of Y/N saying it all.

"Shit! I'm sorry, Y/N... I-I just don't know w-why I did it..." Shauna stammered, covering her mouth with her hands. She turned to go and ran away to hide from this moment. But a hold on her wrist made her plans change.

Slowly Y/N turned Shauna to face her again, the hold on her hand loosening and before the brown eyed could say anything, she grabs the collars of the jacket and presses her lips on hers, closing her eyes. Shauna's reaction came late, however her hands found a firm grip on her waist.

They separated for air, the deep gaze Shauna gave Y/N, admiring her features was enough for her to lean again and kiss her back. She softly pushed her back to the tree, her tongue sneaking in easily since Y/N had her mouth half open from before. It is deeper, desperate and longing, for Shauna it was a dream come true, she craved for it for a few weeks. Before they separated again for the same reason, Shauna bit her bottom lip, bringing it with herself.

"I guess you just keep winning, Shipman." Y/N said in a low voice, giggling.

Shauna laughs quietly too, pecking her lips a few times. "It's definitely my lucky day."

•••

After what happened that night, Shauna and Y/N couldn't stop kissing. They took every opportunity now to suck their faces, in public or not. At first it was shocking for their friends, not used to it even the involved ones were shocked too. And it did not help when Jackie spotted them kissing before Shauna's practice. The captain was giving them a hard time, mainly Lottie, who with a tired smile apologizes in Jackie's name.

They don't talk about what they are now, just enjoying this new and exciting experience.

Shauna separated from Y/N a little and opened her eyes, seeing how the girl chased her, she couldn't hold a chuckle. "Shauna!" Y/N whined softly.

"Sorry... You look adorable." Shauna murmurs, pecking her nose and positioning herself to a side on her bed, moving her own hair from her eyes.

Y/N rolls her eyes and copies her, helping to remove her hair out and later caressing her cheek while biting a smile. "I would probably look more adorable if I wore your flannel shirt." She teases her a little, moving her hand from her cheek to her collar, playing with it.

A new image about it entered Shauna's head, and she couldn't complain about it. Her hand flies to her waist and with her thumb caressed the exposed skin. She leaned again to capture her lips with hers, tasting her mouth for fifteenth time that day.

"You know," Y/N started to say when they broke the kiss, the brunette trailing kisses for her jawline, her fingers tangled on her hair. "You can stay here tonight... My parents are on another date night and Hugo is with my grandparents..." Y/N said casually, some whimpers escaped from her mouth.

Shauna raised her head and locked her brown eyes on her new favourite colour. "I can arrange it, just let me call my mom." She muttered, this time Y/N let out a soft laugh, making Shauna frown. "What?" She asked while searching her phone.

"You don't need to hear it twice." Y/N sang, seeing Shauna roll her eyes. She knew that the yellowjacket player doesn't have a good relationship with their parents, any excuse to not spend time in that house is enough for her.

"I'm not letting you here all alone. I'm pity you, that's all." Shauna said in a fake seriousness, breaking it immediately when Y/N burst laughing, accusing her it was a lie. "Shut up woman and do the dinner. I'm going to call my mother." The brunette shushed her with a chaste kiss on her lips and standing up she walks quickly outside to avoid the cushion Y/N throws her way with a protest.

But Y/N stayed on her bed scrolling on her phone the minutes Shauna spoke with her mother. The brunette enters inside again and lay down. Y/N let her phone down and look at her with an apprehensive look. "Do you prefer to stay here and wait a little longer for dinner?" She offers, intertwining her right hand on her left.

Shauna nods and rubs with her free hand on her face, removing her hair with a frustrated sigh. Y/N leaned her head on her shoulder and looked at her. "You don't have the fault, whatever it is." She reminds her gently, knowing very well what she has on her mind for previous times. She let out a sight and leaned on her elbows, brushing her nose on her cheek until her lips were lined on hers, trying to distract her with her kisses.

It works, she could feel how Shauna slowly started to relax, the hand intertwined with hers letting it go to wrap the arm around her waist and bring her nearer, her other hand fly to her hair. Y/N broke the kiss when the air to her lungs was necessary, a loving gaze installed on her eyes when she looked at Shauna Shipman with her pink cheeks, swollen lips and an intense gaze.

The hand Shauna had on her hair travelled softly towards her left cheek, caressing it with her thumb. Y/N positioned on top of her, biting her lip, not breaking her gaze on her. Shauna's thumb lined her red swollen lips to release the pressure on the lip. She didn't know why but after a moment, her thumb was introduced to her mouth, gaining a low moan from Y/N. Eagerly, Shauna reincorporated enough to replace her thumb for her tongue, kissing her vehemently with a mix of lust. She changes the roles and now she is on top of her, supporting her weight with a hand on the mattress, near Y/N's head. Meanwhile, Y/N's hands tangled on her brunette hair and her legs were wrapping on her waist.

"It will be my first time..." Y/N shyly said when Shauna started to let wet mouth kisses on her neck, closing her eyes. Of course it made the girl on top of her stop.

After a few seconds and when Y/N started to regret what she said, Shauna grabs her hands Y/N took off from her hair to put on her eyes to hide from her. "It will be mine too..." She confessed in a whisper, making Y/N open her eyes and seeing the sincere look directed towards her. "We don't have to do anything, you know?"

Y/N softened when she heard Shauna say that.

They both pictured it very differently. Y/N always thought that maybe Charlotte Matthews would be the person doing this, and Shauna dreamed about it with Jackie. But now Y/N only could think about Shauna, about her poems, about her little noise she let out when she is pissed or annoyed by someone, about how always she worries about her or her friends, about how her mysterious brown eyes hide how truly she is. And then, she realised she is in love with Shauna Shipman. Deep down, Y/N knows this would be a mistake.

While they gaze at each other, both of them with waves on their minds, trying to let the peace calm their senses, they thought that maybe, it is worth taking the risk.

It's Shauna who made the bold move in a shy, but gentle manner. She kissed her slowly, savouring every part of her mouth, letting her know what she was feeling. After all, Shauna is not good at expressing her emotions with words.

"I want to make love to you." Shauna whispered in her mouth, her dilated pupils meeting their own.

Y/N smiled, pecking her lips. "Me too." Whispered back, brushing her nose with hers.

•••

The next day, Shauna woke up when the sun shined on her face. She let out a groan, hiding her head on the pillow. When she tried to move her arm, it was trapped at a heavy weight. Slowly, she opened one eye, adjusting to the natural light involving the room, then she opened the other, doing the same thing. Her eyes fell on the other person laying there, her naked back facing her. Memories from last night running to her mind and a silly smile finding a place in her mouth. Her arm is trapped under Y/N's body, she can't feel it and at the moment she doesn't care. She wrapped her other arm around her hip and pressed her chest on her back, hiding her head in the crook of her neck, pecking the skin there. When she was starting to drift off, Y/N stirred in her sleep and changed the position, now they are face to face.

It's Y/N's turn to wake up. She blinked a few times when opened her eyes for the first time that day and when she adjusted, an involuntary smile approached on her face. She scanned Shauna's features, the normal frown between her eyebrows was gone, replaced by a line. Her messy hair framing her sleeping face, Y/N moves her hand to her hair and with her index finger, she starts to play with a lock. Her eyes find the marks Y/N did last night on her neck, it's not too much, only two but notorious. She knew that herself had more and probably bigger, not only on her neck. A blush spread from her ears to her cheeks when without pretending her eyes fell on Shauna's chest, she removed eyes quickly.

"You love that I'm watching you, do you?" Y/N said in a hoarse voice, a hint of tease there. She saw Shauna's corner of her mouth up, clearly feeling her gaze on her body.

"Maybe, I don't want to interrupt your moment." Shauna said back, half laughing.

Before they could start with the bickering, Y/N was hungry, the proof was her stomach sounded, and knowing Shauna was too, she stood up and saw the green flannel laying on the floor, she grabbed it and put it on, covering her chest. Then, she went to grab some comfortable pants.

"What?" Y/N asked when saw Shauna gazing at her with hypnotic eyes, accompanied by a smile.

"I don't mind if you wear my clothes now." She teased, but secretly enjoyed the views.

Y/N showed her middle finger and indicated to her that she could grab clothes from her closet before disappearing to the kitchen.

The morning went well, Y/N's parents were working and they acted like a truly couple at breakfast. Shauna needed to come back to her house, for her dismay. So with a promise to Y/N to see her later in the theatre with the gang, the brunette stole a few kisses and marched away, too happy to not hide it when she entered on the dark living room.

•••

The following weeks, Shauna and Y/N acted like they were a couple. Their affection intensified, like Shauna approaching with a little bouquet of red roses with a poem she wrote. Y/N cooking for her because she knows Shauna likes how she cooks and gives her to take some to her house if she can't stay with her. And many more little details that are making not only Jackie insane, Natalie is happy for her friends but also sick to see the love that two profess and it didn't help when Misty Quigley rant about the couple, looking at them with an envious gaze but at the same time with amazement, weird in Nat's opinion, then she thinks is Misty and there's not another explanation.

For Y/N, November came with a tenderness and brighter feeling, even if the weather tried to tell her the contrary. She is happy when Shauna holds her hand every time they meet in the halls or when they sit down with their friends and keep on their little bubble, murmuring no sense with enamoured smiles on their faces.

But the downfall is coming and Y/N isn't ready for that.

It was on Thursday, usually Shauna had training that day of the week and Y/N had theatre class. That day was raining a lot, like if the sky was crying about all of them for something they still didn't know. Y/N walked to her locker to grab her math book to study later on her home, she closed it and when she turned her distracted mind came to a hold when saw the wet figure walking slowly towards her. A grin took power of her features seeing Shauna with her usual flannel, this time purple and also a little wet from the rain. Her hair was down, not caring about how wet it is. Y/N told her a few times she needed to dry it and especially at this period of time.

Shauna approached her with a nervous look and slow steps, a hand holding the lashes of her backpack. She held her breath when Y/N leaned to peck her lips, Shauna thought she didn't deserve Y/N. She removes her hair from her face and puts some strand of hair behind her ear, giving Y/N a lipped smile. Then Y/N grabbed her free hand to guide them outside, but Shauna remained in the empty hall.

"What? You forget something?" Y/N asks confused, still her smile on.

Shauna opened her mouth and closed it. She scratched her neck facing the floor. "I need to talk to you..." She whispers, her eyes coming back to Y/N face. Shauna played with the hand intertwined with hers, balancing it softly.

"Okay...?" Y/N chuckles confused, trying to decipher Shauna's behaviour. Sometimes it is really difficult for her to know what happens in her mind.

The brunette swallows hard, but decides it's time. "It's about Jackie." She whispers again, seeing how Y/N nods and remaining quiet to let her explain herself. "I told her everything." She is so cowardly that couldn't see her reaction at her confession. The hold on her hand loosen. She felt worse when Y/N asked the reason in a thread voice, she even didn't seem mad at her. "Jackie told me she is in love with me... And told her everything, about the plan we made." Her brown eyes were raised to explain and when she finished, Y/N painted a dry smile.

"Of course you did..." Y/N muttered, she could start to feel how the anger was building inside her. She bit her lip so hard that she could taste the blood from the newly cut. "That's what you care about me?" She asks, betrayed.

Shauna shakes her head quickly, a scared look on her face. "No, of course not! But we have a deal, right? We will stop the moment they confess to us." She knew that words should never be left her mouth. She cursed herself. She opened her mouth to speak again but Y/N raised her hand in front of her to stop her.

"I always knew that I would never compete with Jackie. I feel so dumb to let you in...," Y/N started to say in a betrayed voice, some tears escaping from her eyes. Shauna swallowed hard, hating herself for doing it to you. "I trust you, Shauna! I fucking fell for you and I thought it was mutual. I'm guessing now that it's not." Her voice was raised with every word, to Shauna it felt like a punch. A new word a new punch, and she knew she deserved it. "It took you three weeks to throw up my hope, my heart! Don't dare to look at me like that, you fucking hypocrite!" Y/N yelled more when Shauna tried to grab her hand. She stopped when Y/N moved aside, now her cheeks wet for her tears falling from her eyes. The words echo not only in the empty hall, in Shauna's head too.

"GO AWAY!!" Shauna jumped, some tears falling from her own eyes to see the person that actually loved her with her heart broken for her fault. She doubted, but walked away to let you have some space. She felt horrible, she was happy with her. Why did Jackie need to approach and confess when she truly was happy?

Y/N let her book fall to the floor, and leaned her back on the lockers. Her hands travelled to her face, sobs echoing. She hates herself for letting Shauna enter so deep in her heart. Her breath caught on her throat, a knot forming there.

"Y/N?" Someone called, Y/N turned to hide, now her face is looking at the lockers. She didn't know who it was, but wished the person left her alone. But the person had other plans and turned around, on her blurry vision she could see a tall figure looking at her with a worry expression. "You are having a panic attack. Follow my breath." Lottie grabs Y/N's face between her hands, making her look at her and copy her breathing. After a while, Lottie got Y/N to breathe normal again. Y/N hid on her chest, muttering incoherent things. Lottie wraps her arms around her waist and leans her head on top of hers, letting Y/N vent.

The tall brunette took Y/N outside, the rain pouring on them but Lottie took her to her car. They entered the back seat and just like the sky was pouring into the city, Y/N did the same thing with Lottie, wetting her yellow shirt. She didn't mind at all. "Shauna broke up with me..." Y/N says in a whisper.

"Why?" Lottie asked gently, playing with her hair. That simple question made Y/N squirm, a shadow of pink approaching on her cheeks.

Y/N sighed and thought that everything is fucked up, so why don't tell her the truth? "We made a plan to make Jackie and you jealous," she confessed, embarrassed. She saw how Lottie was surprised to hear it. "I always have a crush on you... And everyone knows about the crush Shauna has on Jackie. So we planned it, well I proposed it to her." She whispers, scratching her head nervously and avoiding Lottie's gaze. "We spent a lot of time together, in highschool and out of it. It changes in that party when Shauna scores and gives an assist." Y/N murmured, playing with her fingers on her lap. "We kissed that night. Since then, we can't stop making out. I fell in love with her Lottie..." She started to cry again. "We... I lost my virginity with her..." Lottie could hear her heartbeat in her ears, pounding. She wraps an arm around Y/N shoulders and hugs her. She has a lot of emotions right now, but Y/N needs her, and Lottie would do anything for that girl. "S-She told everything at Jackie the m-moment she confessed her feelings tow-wards her..." She stammered, wiping her cheeks while some sobs escaped from her mouth.

There's nothing Lottie could do or say something, she just holds her.

•••

Six months.

That's the time Shauna spoke to Y/N for the last time. She saw how little by little recomposed herself, with Lottie's help and move on. At first Shauna tried to approach her, but Lottie didn't let her. She tried on several occasions, and with a sad expression walked away when Lottie with a warning look stopped her.

Shauna saw how slowly, with patience and little details Lottie healed Y/N's heart. It hurt her how a morning Shauna went out of her car and before she could step inside, from a distance appreciate Lottie holding Y/N's face between her hands and kiss her, a shy smile approached her features, breaking her heart in the process.

During a match, Shauna was playing like shit, she thought how the hell did the coach sub her off. It worsened when Lottie scored and after celebrating with her teammates, the tall brunette ran with a grin towards the bleachers to kiss Y/N, all people there cheered the public affection. It really pissed Shauna.

The funny part is that Shauna never wanted to break up and in fact, was Y/N without realising who broke it. Shauna informed her about what happened, but never with other intentions. Jackie understood after she explained the whole thing, even if her own heart was broken in the process, she can't deny the way Shauna talks about Y/N. Since then, her best friend approached again and tried her best to help her, also trying to talk with Y/N herself, and with the same result as Shauna, Lottie with the experience from the previous months, didn't let her in fear of Jackie insulting Y/N.

Today, after six months, Shauna felt exhausted. She abandoned the training, not supporting anymore the constant yelling from her coach and failing simple drills, it didn't help too the pity looks towards her. Something she is glad about is that they stayed out of what happened, she didn't care if they criticized her on her back, she wanted peace for once.

With a frustrated sigh she slammed the door, the cleat resound in the empty changing room. Shauna walked towards her bench, sitting there. Her hands covered her face, tears streaming down. She felt so tired, about everything. The worst part is that she can't explain properly, only a person lets her and is the main reason for what happened.

Shauna was so lost in her mind that she didn't realise someone was entering. The person walked towards her and wrapped around her shoulders, startling her. The brunette removes her hands from her face and sees the last person she thought would see. Y/N gives her a lipped sad smile, Shauna's doe eyes not believing what she is seeing.

"What are you doing here?" She whispered, fearing she spoke loudly Y/N would disappear.

"Lottie texted me." Y/N whispered back, caressing her arm. Shauna leaned her head on her shoulder, smelling the aroma she missed like a crazy those months without her. "Everything okay at home?" She asked softly.

"Like always." Shauna admitted in a muffling voice. "Can I tell you something?" She shyly asks.

"Of course." Y/N reply, playing now with Shauna's messy bun.

"It's about that moment... I think you thought the wrong thing because I didn't explain correctly...," Shauna started to say without moving her head from her neck and pausing to let Y/N stop it if she felt uncomfortable. But she didn't. "I told Jackie everything, the full story. And what happened between the fake part of our relationship. I told her that for once in my life I was feeling happy, someone who thinks for herself and is encouraged by someone who supports me... For once I fell in love and this time didn't hurt, because it was pure and sincere from the start..." More tears fell from her eyes. Y/N grabbed her chin gently with a fear and sad look, an idea in her mind. She is crying too and before wipes her own tears, she raises her thumbs to her cheeks and wipes Shauna's.

"Shauna..." Y/N whispered, her breathing caught in her throat.

"I don't want to break up with you. I just wanted to inform you, and I know I was nervo-..." Y/N shushed her the moment Shauna let slip from her mouth what she feared to hear out loud.

"Why didn't you tell me before?" Y/N asked sadly, a hint of pain in her voice.

"I tried! But Lottie didn't let me and I don't blame her. She wanted to protect you, I would do the same thing..." Shauna admitted, wiping now Y/N's tears.

They spend a few minutes in silence, Shauna staring at her and Y/N at the floor, thinking. "I'm sorry..." Y/N start to say, looking at her. Shauna opened her mouth to say that she didn't need to apologise, but she didn't let her. "I don't want to hurt you. That's never my intention and finding it now makes me feel sick... I can't change what happened. I'm in love with Lottie. But believe me please when I told you that you made me fall in love with you. That's months with you were magical. You make me feel unique and special and I truly hope you find someone who deserves you."

Shauna sobs, throwing herself in Y/N's arms.

They hugged each other for a long time. The rest of the team finished the training and found them like that. Lottie gave Y/N a worry but reassuring look, and Jackie a wink with a grateful smile.

"I will always love you, Y/N." Shauna whispered.

"I will always love you too, Shauna Shipman." Y/N copied her.

"Shit, it really is a drama lesbian." Van muttered lowly, but the looks from the others tell her that they listened. Y/N and Shauna's soft laugh interrupted the tension.

[cacoetheswriting]

pearl: october 1985

pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader word count: 2.3k summary: rebuilding your friendship with eddie was easy. trying to remain just friends is hard, but how do you tell him that?

content warnings: best friends to lovers, slow burn, mutual pining, suggestive & mature themes, adult language, use of pet names, idiots in love, emotional hurt / comfort, self-doubt / insecurities, reader has nightmares - if i missed anything, pls let me know!

pearl masterlist

“Anything you need, you just call me, okay?” You say to the young girl, “No matter the time of day, no matter where you are or if you think you’ll be interrupting me, just call.”

“Thanks.” Eleven mutters and does her best to offer you a smile.

“You and I, we gotta stick together, El.” You pull her in for a short lived hug. “Only we know what this feels like and we gotta support each other.”

“I’ll call you. I promise,” she assures before walking over to say goodbye to her friends.

By the time the Byers’ house is empty, boxes and bags packed into the car, everyone is crying. There’s some more hugs and you watch them drive off, holding onto Nancy. Once the car is out of sight, Steve asks you both to come over, hang out with him and Robin for a bit. It’s a request you politely decline. Going through a rollercoaster of emotions this afternoon, there was only one place you truly wanted to be.

Things between Eddie and you were pretty much back to normal. Ever since the incident at Starcourt Mall, you two were inseparable. Everywhere you went, there the metalhead followed — as if he was afraid something would happen if you were apart.

Eddie only ever left you alone to sleep, but even then it was only a couple of nights a week. Convincing him to stay with you wasn’t hard, convincing him to share a bed with you was even easier, and having Eddie by your side most nights helped you not only fall asleep but also stay asleep.

The horrible dreams you had earlier this year of the Demodogs, as described to you by the kids, were nothing compared to the nightmares you had been having ever since the events from the start of July. Witnessing the horrors of the Upside Down first hand… no one could have prepared you for that. And now, almost every single night, you woke up panting or actually screaming.

The first time you had a nightmare around Eddie, you borderline gave him a heart attack. The poor boy jumped out of bed, ready to tackle whatever intruder he perceived had broken into your bedroom. What he found instead was you, sitting hunched over in your bed with tears streaming down your face.

To this day, you hadn't told the metalhead what actually happened the night of the 4th of July. You decided along with the rest of the group that it was better he didn’t know the truth. Not only was this your way of protecting him, you figured even if you did try to explain, Eddie probably wouldn’t believe you. 

So you lied and said you’d been having nightmares ever since your dad died and he was kind enough not to press on the matter further.

Life with Eddie was easy, it always had been. Aside from your persistent nightmares, you quickly slipped back into your best friend dynamic and the remainder of the summer was uneventful. Only your feelings for him grew stronger. Past the platonic mark you were hovering over when you left for college; when you first kissed him.

You didn’t know how to tell him or if you should say anything in the first place. After all, you just got your friendship back to what it used to be and you sure as hell weren’t going to be the one to jeopardise that. He had the letters. He read them. There was nothing more to it.

But Eddie Munson never made anything easy for you. With his lingering touches, heartwarming stares. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he still loved you too.

And you say “still” because, even though the metalhead never admitted it out loud, you’re ninety-nine percent sure he once did — if the kiss you shared was any indication, however contrived it may have been, under the circumstances. 

“Say your goodbyes?” Eddie asks when you appear in his room. He’s sitting on his bed, legs spread out in front of him and a copy of Lord of the Rings in his hands. He sets the book to the side when you plop next to him, head instantly attaching itself to his shoulder like a magnet.

“Yeah,” you exhale, “I hate goodbyes.”

“Me too,” he mutters as he intertwines his fingers with yours. “But this time it’s for the best, you know? The girl needs to get away for a while. Honestly, I didn’t even know Hopper had a kid and then for him to just die in that fire, leaving her all alone—”

Eddie bites his tongue and glances down at you. “Let’s talk about something else,” he offers and you meet his gaze.

“Like what?”

He licks his lips, pondering the question for a moment. You can’t help but to avert your gaze to where his tongue pressed against his pretty mouth. A certain warm feeling settles in your core as you wonder what it would be like to kiss him.

“How about I read to you?”

You raise an eyebrow, but the metalhead doesn’t wait for your protest — not like he would’ve gotten one anyway. He reaches for the novel he previously set aside and opens to the desired page. He clears his throat while you settle your head back on his shoulder, patiently waiting for him to start.

“Beautiful she is, sir! Lovely! Sometimes like a great tree in flower, sometimes like a white daffadowndilly, small and slender like.” Eddie enunciates, the tone of his voice completely intoxicating.

“Hard as di’monds, soft as moonlight. Warm as sunlight, cold as frost in the stars. Proud and far-off as a snow-mountain, and as merry as any lass I ever saw with daisies in her hair in springtime…”

Every word that spills from his lips is like honey and you’re completely hooked.

“It strikes me that folk takes their peril with them into Lorien, and finds it there because they’ve brought it. But perhaps you could call her perilous, because she’s so strong in herself.”

Eddie pauses. You can sense him shift in his position ever so slightly to look at you, so you look up to meet his doe eyes, a smile creeping up on your features.

“Why did you stop? Keep going.”

He licks his lips although doesn’t say what’s on his mind. Instead, he continues with the book like you ask. “You, you could dash yourself to pieces on her, like a ship on a rock; or drownd yourself, like a hobbit in a river.”

And as he reads, you start to zone out. You can feel yourself drift away. The soothing sound of his voice is putting you to sleep, but just as your eyes are about to close, you hear something.

“But neither rock nor river would be to blame—”

You press your index finger to Eddie’s mouth, getting him to stop. He’s clearly puzzled, quickly taking it in his hand, moving it to the side, only so slightly since the sensation of your skin against his lips makes his heart skip a beat. But he doesn’t dwell on the feeling, afraid to ruin things when they’ve just gotten good, instead shooting you a quizzical look.

“Thought you wanted me to keep going, princess.”

You ignore him. “Can you hear that?”

Eddie’s silent for a split second. Then he says, “Oh, that’s just Wayne. He must have the radio on.”

“Yeah, obviously. I’m talking about the song that’s playing.”

The two of you shift your attention to the door separating Eddie’s bedroom from the remainder of the trailer, though still holding onto one another in some way. The physical touch making up for time lost, you tell yourself, but the reason is clearly much different.

Now that you’re both completely quiet, the unmistakable voice of Janis Joplin seeps in through the small crack. ‘From the Kentucky coal mine to the California sun. There Bobby shared the secrets of my soul.’

You look back at each other almost in an instant and Eddie chuckles, your own giggle follows shortly after. Lighthearted and pure. The situation isn’t necessarily funny, but in this moment, you are both so happy to simply be around each other, the laughter engulfs you whole. And as you’re laughing, you’re inclining even closer to one another.

Then the laughter dies down.

Eddie’s cupping your cheek while your fingers wrap around his wrist, holding him in place. His nose slides down the side of yours and his lips are inches away as they part. Yet it’s not until his hot breath sends a shiver down your spine that you realise what’s about to happen, and more importantly, how much you want it. You’re practically aching with anticipation.

Eddie’s got this look in his eyes, dark and needy. His pupils dilate the longer he stares and it makes you think he wants you too, desperately. You inhale softly, mind racing ‘cause this is a line that you only crossed once back in November and ever since then, you’ve been dancing around the topic, unspoken, untouched. Crossing it again had many possible outcomes — all equally terrifying and exhilarating.

His gaze drops to your lips and your heart flutters in your chest.

“Can I kiss you?”

It’s a whisper, but you hear it as loud as screaming. The question rattles through every fibre of your being and you nod, once, twice. Slow and steady, as you open your mouth to give him a verbal answer.

But before you get a chance, there’s a knock on Eddie’s bedroom door and he drops his hand from your face instantly before pulling away. He clears his throat and suddenly you’re hyper-aware of your surroundings ‘cause he slides off the bed completely avoiding eye contact, completely avoiding the question he’s just asked.

“Yeah?” Eddie calls out, getting up on his feet.

Wayne bops his head in, not fully opening the door. He glances between the two of you, a knowing smirk circling his moustache-covered lips, before his eyes settle on his nephew.

“Headin’ out for a little while. Need anythin’?”

Eddie says no, answering for the two of you. Wayne nods his head and following a swift goodbye, telling you both to be good, he disappears just as fast as he made his appearance. Door closing with a gentle thud.

An awkward silence settles in the air once you are alone with the metalhead again. 

Eddie scratches the back of his neck, gaze settling on the hem of your skirt, where the material ends and your bare leg starts. He swallows his breath, Adam’s apple bobbing. You watch your best friend attentively, afraid of being the first one that speaks. Afraid of asking what’s on his mind, if he wants to continue what you both started before you were unexpectedly interrupted.

That’s not to say the metalhead also wasn’t spinning out, ‘cause he most definitely was. His quiet demeanour was specifically to cover up the fact that he didn’t know what to say now that the moment was gone. 'Cause it was gone... right?

Can I kiss you?, his earlier question rattles inside his brain. Eddie thinks you would’ve said yes, after all, you were nodding. But if he asked again now, would you still want to do it? Would you let him kiss you?

Jesus, why was he so bad at this.

“Uhm,” he sighs, leaning against the edge of his desk. “I-I… Fuck, princess, I-I don’t want to do anything to ruin what we just got back.”

He finally looks up to meet your gaze. “I really, really don’t.”

“I don’t either, Eds.” You say to him and hope he can detect the honesty in your voice, knees now pressed to your chest, arms wrapped tightly around them. “We lost a lot of time.”

“That we did,” he agrees.

“I feel guilty about it.”

“Me too.”

He stares at you, brown-eyes full of sorrow. Your heart aches at the sad, puppy-dog face he’s sporting. All you want is to reach for him, but you’re frozen in place. Glued to the bed, holding your own limbs. And it’s moments like these that make you want to take back everything that’s happened this last year. The kiss, the fight, the months of not speaking. Take back the things that have now become topics you haven’t really talked about. Topics that you both brushed over, then brushed under the carpet.

You know it’s bad to hold shit in, but avoidance has been a third-party in your friendship with Eddie pretty much from day one.

“So, what do you wanna do, princess?” Eddie asks, hopeful.

“We can just take it day by day, I guess. I mean, I know how I feel about you,” you answer honestly, “I also know that it’s a scary world out there and I’d rather have you as just a friend than nothing at all.”

A smile breaks through the brunette’s features. He stumbles forward, settling back on the bed next to you with a small bounce. He reaches for your hand, forcing his fingers between your knuckles and squeezing gently. You tilt your head and he matches your movements, pretty eyes meeting yours.

“I know how I feel about you too, princess.”

pearl masterlist

& tagging some cool people that expressed interest in this lil series: @cactusangie , @spenciesprincess , @capitanostella , @ashlynnkennedy , @ms1oftheboys

[heavyhitterheaux]

Euphoria

Nightingale Series

AN: This takes place in 2021 when they first meet

Synopsis: Jack meets his celebrity crush which is you at his first Met Gala. You've been away for a year and a half from the spotlight and as much as you weren't ready to return, you knew you couldn't escape it

Pairing: Jack Harlow x Famous!Reader

Warnings: drug use, overdose

Jack Harlow Masterlist

Nightingale Series Masterlist

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

“Fuck, baby girl, come on! Wake up, wake up, wake up!” Carmen frantically yelled as she grabbed a hold of your shoulders and began to shake you. She had only taken her eyes off of you for a minute and that was when everything started to go south.

Not getting any movement from you, she scrambled to her purse to dump it out onto the bed in search of the narcan that she carried in case of desperate times such as this one.

She inserted the plunger into your nose and quickly sprayed both sides.

Seconds felt like hours as she waited for some type of movement from you when she then started to cry because it hadn’t worked.

“No, no! You are not leaving me! No!”

She then grabbed her phone and quickly dialed 911, getting an answer almost immediately.

“Hello, 911?”

“I CAN’T WAKE HER UP!” 

“Okay, ma’am. Tell me what’s going on. My name is Hannah and I’m here to help you, what’s your name?”

“MY NAME IS CARMEN. SHE TOOK FENTANYL AND THE NARCAN DIDN’T WORK!”

“Okay, use your pointer and middle fingers to hold it to her neck to check if she has a pulse.”

“Um, okay.” Carmen shakily put the phone on speaker before doing what the 911 operator asked of her.

And felt nothing.

“I… I DON’T FEEL ANYTHING! WHAT DO I DO?”

“Okay, Carmen, listen to me. You’re going to have to start CPR on her.”

“WHAT?! I DON’T KNOW HOW TO DO THAT!”

“I’m going to walk you through it. Take a deep breath for me.”

“Okay…” Carmen shakily said while listening to further directions.

“Place her on a flat surface so that the compressions are sufficient. Place two hands on the center of her chest and push down two inches. Wait until her chest comes all the way back up before doing it again.”

“Okay.”

Carmen placed her hands on your chest and as she pushed down, she felt your ribs crack and immediately shrieked making the tears cloud her vision even more. 

“I think I broke something!”

“Those are her ribs, if you broke them, you’re doing it right. Keep going until I tell you to stop and once you stop, you’re going to check her pulse again.”

“Now that we got that started, I can see your location and help is on the way.”

Carmen now looked from the corner of the room as you twirled around in your custom gown from Dior that you would be wearing to your first Met Gala in a year. The flashback of that night hit her out of nowhere and she tried not to show it on her face.

She just knew for a fact that she would have to bury you.

After she had gotten a pulse back, your heart stopped again on the way to the hospital before you ended up having a stroke in the intensive care unit.

Luckily, there were no deficits from it and looking at you now in front of her, no one would be able to tell that anything like that had ever happened to you.

She despised the person that ever gave you drugs in the first place and no matter how much she tried to lecture you about it, you weren’t trying to hear it.

It calmed you and let you be able to get through the daily expectations of your job. 

The hardest part was calling your parents, but wanting to protect your reputation they immediately went into overdrive.

No one knew what had happened to you and your parents were going to do everything to make sure of it.

Carmen was actually the only one who had never left your side while you were in the hospital along with your other best friend Demi Lovato.

The two of you grew up together and when you both landed up on Disney channel with each of you having your own show, you two were inseparable and did just about everything together. 

Your parents visited once, while your siblings didn’t even show up which she wasn’t surprised by.

Being your assistant ever since you were 12 years old, she had grown a soft spot for you and looked after you like you were her younger sister. Somebody had too, because deep down she knew that your siblings as well as your parents weren’t shit and needed someone to guide you.

She tried to keep them away from you as much as she possibly could and wanted to wrap you in bubble wrap to be able to protect you from the world.

In her eyes, you were as innocent as they come. Despite the drug use.

“You look absolutely beautiful lady bug.” Carmen said when you looked at her for approval.

“Thank you, I just… don’t know if I’m ready for this.” You responded while sighing and smoothing out the front of the dress. This would be your first public appearance in almost two years and the pressure was placed on your shoulders once again.

“Of course you’re ready for it.” You heard your mother say from behind you and all you did was smile. Carmen hated how they treated you and no matter how many times she tried to bring it up, you didn’t want to hear it.

“Are you sure?” You asked turning around to face her as she grabbed both of your hands.

“Yes, I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. You got to have a little break and now it’s go time. Go out there and show them why you’re the favorite and most beloved child star.”

You eagerly nodded your head as she turned to stand next to you and proceeded to take a selfie with the both of you in it while Carmen tried not to roll her eyes.

Your break consisted of going to rehab multiple times since you couldn’t stay clean for more than a week. Technically you weren’t even clean now, but you cut back on how much you used. It used to be multiple times in one day and now you might only partake in it twice in a twenty four hour period. 

Carmen couldn’t wait for the day when you realized between the drugs and the way your family treated you that it was slowly killing you. 

Because dying two times and having a stroke clearly wasn’t enough for you.

At this rate if you kept it up, Carmen didn’t even see you making it to 30.

Right now you were 28.

Carmen never told you this, but when you went to sleep and she knew that you had taken something during the day she would stay up and watch you to make sure you were breathing.

Turning her attention back to you now, she caught you taking a little packet out of your suitcase that contained a white substance and immediately looked at you wide-eyed.

“Lady bug! Where did you even get that?!”

“I’m only going to take a little bit!” You exclaimed while trying to open it with your long stiletto gold nails that complimented your dress. 

“Taking a little bit last time caused your heart to stop and you literally just got out of rehab for the third time yesterday. You’re going to the MET! Last thing you need to be is high!”

“It calms me, I’ll be fine.” You said as your mother simply watched the exchange between the two of you. You had walked out to the front of the hotel suite before she turned to Carmen to say something.

“If she wants to do it, let her. A little is not going to hurt.”

“Denise, do you even hear yourself? Your daughter is addicted to opioids and has already been to rehab multiple times and now she’s getting high before one of the most prestigious events that happen every year? Do you care about her at all? Because keep in mind if something were to happen to her, there goes your cash cow.”

“And what is that supposed to mean? Of course I care about her, she’s my daughter! I only want the best for her!”

“Are you trying to convince me or convince yourself?”

“Look, we hired you to a job and be an assistant to her so do that and stay in your lane. I can take care of my daughter just fine. Do what we pay you to do.” Denise said while leaving out of the room and leaving Carmen to sigh.

—

Jack had just made his way down to the lobby of the hotel and was excited to be able to go to the Met Gala since this was his first time being invited. All of his hard work was paying off and he couldn’t believe that his name was now mentioned in rooms that contained some of the people that he looked up to. He was standing next to Urban when he saw you get off of the elevator all smiles and immediately hit Urban’s arm.

“OW! DAMN! What the hell is wrong with you?” Urban asked as he was now rubbing the spot that Jack had hit.

“Look to your left and don’t be obvious.” Urban took this opportunity to turn his entire body to the left and Jack simply rolled his eyes.

“You literally just did the opposite of what I told you to do. Should have left your ass at home.”

“Oh shit…. Is that? Is that who I think it is?” Urban asked, finally noticing that it was in fact you.

“She’s been off the scene for like two years. I wonder where she’s been.” Neelam said as she was now standing next to both of them.

“Jack, go say hi to your wife.” Urban teased and Jack clearly turned a bright shade of red.

“Well I’ll see her when we get there so I will later. Assuming she’s going seeing as she is dressed up.”

“She’s the one you had posters of in your childhood bedroom?”

“He still does if I’m not mistaken.” Urban answered and all Jack did was shoot him a look.

“I’m ignoring that.” Was all Jack said before the black SUV pulled up outside that would be taking him to the event. 

As he was about to walk out the door, he caught your eye and you sent him a small smile which he immediately returned.

As you watched him walk out the door, you turned to Carmen to ask her who he was. You assumed that he was going to the Met like yourself seeing as he was dressed up.

“Carmen, who’s that? He’s cute, like really cute. That curly hair is doing it for me.”

“Are you……??? Are you serious? That’s Jack Harlow, he's an upcoming rapper. His music is pretty good too.”

“Yes I’m serious, I’ve been basically high and living under a rock for the past year and a half and I only got out of rehab yesterday. So I don’t know how you would expect me to know that.”

“And hopefully that will be the last time.”

“You worry too much, I’ll be fine. Now let’s get this over with so I can order a big plate of cheese fries. I might just have them deliver it there.”

“Lady bug! You will not be eating cheese fries at the Met!”

“I can and I will because that food is disgusting. I’ve been going for years now and the food is never up to par so I just stopped eating it. I really don’t know anyone who ever does.”

“Please be on your best behavior tonight. We don’t need any crazy headlines tomorrow morning.”

“I will, the only thing I’m worried about is possible tripping on my dress in front of an entire crowd of people.”

“Your flats are in my bag.”

“And that is why I keep you around.”

You had hit the carpet about ten minutes ago and everyone was surprised at your arrival. As soon as the cameras started clicking away, you actually felt the nervousness leave you and you were at ease. Or maybe it was the drugs, who knows? You had done a few interviews and had taken pictures before quickly growing bored. You made your way inside to find out that you were in fact going to be sitting next to the famous rapper himself seeing as he was already seated. 

He was cute and you were definitely excited to be able to sit next to him. 

Once he saw you making your way towards the table, he quickly stood up to pull out your chair for you.

“Oh, thank you.” You said while looking up at him and he quickly sat back down before responding to you.

“You’re welcome. You look amazing by the way.”

“Thank you and so do you. Who dressed you tonight?”

“Tommy Hilfiger, you?”

“Dior. Apparently they had been keeping this for me for a while and figured that this was the perfect opportunity for me to be able to wear it.”

“I’m Jack by the way.”

“I know. I’m Y/N, and it’s so nice to finally meet you.”

“So, can I ask what you’ve been up to?”

“Oh, just a few little projects here and there. I figured that I deserved a little break. I have literally been working since I was six months old.”

“That long?!” Jack exclaimed while looking over at you and you simply nodded.

“I was a model first before everything else and I’m hoping to get back to it eventually. I recently listened to your album and it’s really good.”

Recently meaning in the car on your way over here.

“That means a lot coming from you. Do you have a favorite?”

“Hmm, Luv is Dro is definitely high up on that list and Already Best Friends. What’s yours?”

“Probably Keep it Light.”

“Oh, and I assumed it was your mom at the end giving you that advice? I completely agree. One day you literally just have to sit and take it all in. We’re blessed to be able to do this and we have to think that there are many people in the world who will never get the same opportunities that we do. I try not to take it for granted even if I do fall short sometimes. Just as you progress and get more well-known, never forget the people who helped you to get where you are because those are going to be the people that show up for you every single time.”

You mingled with other guests before they began to bring the food out and you tried not to gag as your plate was set in front of you, but Jack definitely saw you make a face and tried not to laugh. When the server had left your table, you immediately turned to Jack and shook your head.

“Don’t eat it. The food is disgusting and it always is. You would think after so many years that they would get better, but apparently not. My dog could make better food than this.”

“It doesn’t look all that appetizing anyway.” He answered while picking up his fork and poking what looked to be some type of meat and inspecting it. 

“I’m getting cheese fries after this. I haven’t had fries in so long that I forgot what they taste like.”

“What? How can you ever forget what cheese fries taste like?” Jack curiously asked you and all you did was shrug.

“I haven’t had them since I was thirteen so I plan on treating myself today. You can tag along if you want to.”

“I just might take you up on that offer.”

“I know the perfect spot where we can go with absolutely no paparazzi.”

—

The two of you had managed to escape the Met a few minutes before it was about to end and walked down a few streets until you found the little hole in the wall restaurant. Jack was a little skeptical once you led him through a dark alley which was a shortcut.

“Come on curly top, I’m not going to bite. It’s a shortcut”

“But… your dress.”

You looked down to see that it was slightly dragging and proceeded to pick it up to hold it above your thighs.

Your mom was going to kill you if you ruined this dress.

“There, problem solved. Now come on because I’m starving. I haven’t eaten all day.”

Once the two of you reached the restaurant, you both sat in a booth across from each other and you were scanning the menu when you heard Jack’s voice.

“I don’t know why you’re looking at the menu when you came here for one thing and one thing only.”

“You’re right, but I still like to look just in case I change my mind.”

“Y/N! Long time no see!”

“Hi, Frankie. I’ve missed you!” You said as she leaned down to hug you. 

Frankie owned the restaurant and you always made it your mission to come and visit her every single time you were in New York no matter what was going on and how busy you were. 

“And I see you’ve brought a friend.” She said, turning to Jack and wiggling her eyebrows.

“Will you behave for once in your life? This is…”

“Jack. I know, big fan. And I’m not going to behave until I get you a boyfriend. Who knows? Maybe Jack wants to date you. Been my mission since you were 21.” Frankie said and you proceeded to roll your eyes and Jack turned beet red, but you tried not to acknowledge it.

“Frankie, we only met a few hours ago.”

“And that’s supposed to mean something?”

“You’re a lost cause. Anyway, a large order of cheese fries and Jack, what did you want?”

“I’ll take the same thing.”

“Coming right up.”

Once Frankie had walked away, you turned back to shake and simply shook your head before your phone went off indicating that Carmen was calling you.

“Yes?”

“WHERE ARE YOU?!”

“At Frankie’s with Jack. Stop yelling.”

“I AM GOING TO YELL BECAUSE I CANNOT LET YOU OUT OF MY SIGHT FOR THIRTY SECONDS. SO YOU LEAVE WITHOUT TELLING ANYONE?!”

“We were coming right back, mom number two.”

“Y/N! Don’t start!”

“I’ll bring you back something.”

“No need, I’m on my way.”

“What the?”

“Don’t argue with me either.”

As you hung up the phone, Jack was asking you if everything was okay before Carmen literally opened the door to the restaurant and made a beeline towards the two of you.

“Seriously?” You asked her in disbelief as she slid in next to you.

“Yes, seriously. Hi Jack, I’m Carmen, Y/N’s personal assistant and second mother and I protect her with my life. So, if you don’t have pure intentions while you’re around her, I suggest you…”

“OKAY! Can you please excuse her, Jack? She has anxiety and tends to get paranoid sometimes.” You said as Frankie brought out a humongous plate of cheese fries and your mouth instantly watered before diving into them. 

“I get it, being in this industry, you don’t know people’s true intentions all the time.”

“And that’s where I come in. Frankie! We need to get this to go!”

“But we just sat down and you basically ruined my friend date with Jack.” You whined and Jack sent you a small smile.

“You can have friend dates in the future, now let’s go. The car is outside.”

“Bye, Jack. It was nice meeting you and next time when we go out, which I assume is going to happen, I promise to leave my chaperone at home and to turn off my location.”

“Y/N!”

“I’m looking forward to it.”

Carmen slid out the booth so you could make your way outside before then turning around to Jack. 

She made sure you were out of earshot before saying anything. 

“Look, you seem like a really nice guy, but you do not want to get involved with her and some of the people that are around her.”

“Wait, what?”

“Jack, this is nothing against you at all. It’s just… I have to protect her. I literally consider her my daughter and she’s been through a lot these past two years. I don’t need anyone messing this up for her. Not that I think you will, but… sometimes she can be so clueless despite having been in this industry for her entire life.”

“I’m not understanding?”

“Jack, it’s better if you never find out. Just if she does decide that she wants to talk to you because lord knows that I can’t stop her…. Do not under any circumstances hurt her because I will literally come for your throat and you can kiss your career goodbye.”

Without another word, Carmen picked up your box of cheese fries before sliding Jack his and made her way outside.

Once she slid into the backseat of the car, she saw you pop two more pills in your mouth.

Not wanting to fight with you, she didn’t even say anything and just handed you your fries which you happily began to eat.

Carmen began saying a silent prayer that you would realize that your luck was bound to run out.

Every day she woke up not knowing if it was the last time that she was going to see you alive. 

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[galacticwildfire]

Sad, Beautiful, Tragic | Alicent Hightower

One

Alicent Hightower x Targaryen!oc

Their fathers sworn enemies, Viserra and Alicent should never have been as close as they were, yet it was a connection neither could fight. What began as an innocent girlhood companionship becomes something scandalous, with the bastard daughter of Daemon Targaryen showing her true colours. As the dance begins she finds herself torn between her loyalty to her house and her love for her father. Yet neither hold a candle to her forbidden love for the new queen, a love which threatens to destroy them both.

Word count : 6600

A/N: this chapter is set during episode one, setting up the tone for the rest of the story. For hotd/got stories I do not typically use tags unless it is for severe content warnings, all violence and themes will align with that in canon.

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A year it's been since I've stepped foot in Kings Landing. So long has passed since my father decided to take me on one of his adventures to Dorne and then across the narrow sea, to show me the ruins of old Valyria with my own eyes, only to return for the heir's tournament. 

Except despite his insistence, it is not his tournament, but that of the king's unborn child. I can only imagine how Rhaenyra must feel as the king's daughter, because gods do I know how my father is taking it as the king's brother. If he were to be disinherited by a baby boy he may just kill it himself.

"Now," Father begins as we walk through the gates of the Red Keep, our dragons returning to the Dragonpit for the first time in so long. "If that cunt of Hightower makes even a single comment I want to know."

"It's Otto Hightower, of course he will," I reply, knowing the reason he decided to take me and leave. Otto Hightower made the mistake of complaining to the king that I am of too low a status to be seen with his daughter. Something my father did not take well to. "He's a cunt by nature, you can't win them all over."

"I don't have any desire to win him over, what I desire is to cut his tongue out for calling my only daughter a bastard."

"Except I am a bastard," I remind him, the very words Viserys told him. "His tongue cannot be cut out for speaking the truth."

"A legitimised bastard, I made sure of that," he reminds me in return. "My brother knew he'd have hell to pay if he didn't give you the Targaryen name and legitimise you, especially after I named you in his honour. Don't forget that when you walk through the Red Keep you are my heir and a fucking dragon rider. You are above the likes of Otto Hightower."

"It's not hard to be above him," I remark and say "I'll just be glad to see Rhaenyra and Alicent."

He groans. "You truly wish to run around with that girl knowing who her father is?"

"Alicent is sweet," I dismiss, immediately protective. "It's hardly her fault who her father is."

"That may be true but she is utterly boring," he remarks and I roll my eyes. "Rhaenyra is the one you ought to be close with." 

"If I recall I was inseparable with both before the kingsguard had to stop you from cutting Otto's tongue out in the small council chamber."

"And I'd do it again."

"In that case I'll happily run around with Alicent and Rhaenyra," I tell him. "They are the closest thing I have to sisters, I will not let insults take that from me."

"Yes well, as long as Otto doesn't like it I'm fine with it," he allows and reminds me. "Now don't let them keep Darkfyre in the pits for too long, she's growing fast out of captivity. I give it only a few years and she'll be as large as Caraxes." He looks towards the throne room. "You go settle in, I'll see you after."

He leaves me to my own devices, and the first place I go is to the queens chambers to see her, it's only by chance they are both there as well.

"Your grace, the Lady Viserra."

As I'm announced they all look to me in surprise, but it is a happy one.

Rhaenyra immediately jumps up to hug me, followed by Alicent, and I look over their shoulders to Aemma, sitting up with a hand resting on her belly.

"I was starting to worry your father would never bring you back," she says and reaches out her hand. "Come here child, let me see you." She smiles as I come over. "You look like Jeyne more every day."

Jeyne. My mother. A lady in waiting to Aemma when she was first brought to court from the Vale. I know well enough it was not love what happened between her and my father, for he left her at the first mention of pregnancy and returned for me after she had died in the childbed. But before then Aemma had promised my mother she would care for me, and she has. 

"How are you faring?" I ask her, noticing her discomfort. 

"I could be better, but as I was just telling Rhaenyra, you three girls will soon be in this bed and you must learn to face it with a stiff lip."

For Rhaenyra and Alicent an arranged marriage to a great house is a certainty, for me it is an impossibility. "I think my father would sooner send any suitor to the sword than have me wed."

She chuckles. "That is true." She looks past me to Rhaenyra and Alicent and says "Now you girls go and have fun, I have no doubt there is much to catch up on."

~

The three of us walk arm in arm through the Red Keep, the two of them asking eagerly of tales from across the narrow sea which I give vividly. When Rhaenyra is called away to serve as her fathers cupbearer on the council, I take Alicent to the dragon pit. 

Come," I say, holding her hand. "Come see how Darkfyre's grown."

Darkfyre, named to honour my fathers sword Darksister. The keepers are still coaxing her into the pit since it's been so long since she's been in captivity.

"Lykiri," I tell her, since the keepers struggle to tame her. Alicent stands behind me as I put a hand on her black scales to ease her. "Lykiri."

"She's larger than Syrax," Alicent comments in surprise. "Far larger."

"Keeping them captive in the dragon pit is hindering their growth," I tell her. "Since travelling around Dorne and the free cities with father she's been free to grow."

"It's been so long since a Targaryen's stepped foot in Dorne," she says, knowing her histories. "What was your father doing there?"

"Well, he decided to go remind the Dornish we have dragons," I put it simply. "Parading himself trying to gather favour. We were guests of the prince of the Dorne for a while, it truly is beautiful in Sunspear."

"I can imagine," she says. "So what's brought your father back?"

"Gods know, he's likely grown bored and has decided to give his brother and your father hell again."

We're both able to laugh despite how our fathers despise one another. While my father is content to burn his bridges, I don't have that luxury. As a bastard my standing is fragile enough, I need all the friends at court I can have.

"I'm glad to be back," I tell her. "I've missed home. As much as I love my father I have no desire to spend my time in Dornish brothels as he does."

She raises an eyebrow. "Then what is it you desire?"

"To be the greatest dragon rider there is," I tell her, flashing a smile as I take her hand, coaxing her towards Darkfyre. "Here, don't be afraid."

She's too stunned to refuse as I bring her hand to Darkfyre and she gasps at the touch. "I've never-"

"Touched a dragon?" I finish, knowing how she's always refused to. "See, there's no reason to fear them. They're loyal to their riders."

"Except I'm not her rider."

"Yet," I tease, knowing she's large enough to saddle two. "My father took me up on Caraxes when I was just a week old, as his mother did with him."

"My father would kill me if I even considered it."

That makes me smile. "It would be a bit hard for him to kill you if you were on dragonback."

She shakes her head, smiling. "You have not changed a bit."

~

The three of us lay beneath the Weirwood tree in the garden. Alicent testing me on my studies which have been truly neglected this past year, except I've gained a knowledge that is truly invaluable. Experience. Seeing the places we read of, being part of their living history instead of flipping through books.

"It doesn't matter what lord married what lady fifty years ago," I lecture. "What matters is the state of everything today, and unless it's Valyrian history what's the point?"

Rhaenyra laughs. "Did Daemon tell you that?"

"Well it's true," I say, him being my sole educator for the past year. "Across the narrow sea no one asks what lord married what lady fifty years ago, they want to hear of the dragons and the conqueror."

"Now that is something I can agree with," Rhaenyra says much to Alicent's annoyance, who's trying to get us up to scratch for the septa. 

"The Septa will be furious if you two insist on jesting."

"The Septa's funny when she's furious."

I laugh but Alicent senses something deeper. "You're always like this when you're worried."

"Like what?"

"Disagreeable."

There's something in the look the two share that makes my heart sink a little, that in my absence the two have become closer. It was always the three of us, and now it is them with me there as well.

"You're worried your father is about to overshadow you with a son."

"I only worry for my mother," Rhaenyra says, a sentiment I share. 

"She'll be alright," I try to assure her. "She's done this many times."

"And yet I'm the only one that lives."

Her reply is morbid enough to make Alicent quiet.

"Yes, but if you're mother has endured childbirth this many times over the odds are in her favour," I say, trying to put it logically. "Trust in the maesters."

I look to Alicent, who lost her own mother whilst I was in the free cities, and silently reach for her hand. It seems more has changed in my absence than I thought. 

~

That night my father requests I come with him to Fleabottom to witness his new force of Gold Cloaks. I stand by his side as he gives his speech to his men, listening as the men howl and the violence begins.

It's pure butchery unlike anything I've ever seen, but father watches me so I keep my horror buried deep, not letting it show. I don't understand the reason for me being hear until he puts Darksister in my hand and the goldcloaks bring forth a bloodied man.

"Now, you may have returned to the keep but I cannot allow you to get soft," he says as I stare numbly at the sight. "You must not be afraid of blood nor a blade, for one day it could be the only thing standing between you and death." The man writhes, begging for mercy. "This blade will be yours one day, Darksister, blade of Visenya. I intend to make you worthy of it."

And so I raise the blade and spill my first blood.

~

Alicent is with me the next morning, helping me alter a dress for the tournament since my bust has come in this past year and the clothes I left here in the keep are ill fitting as a result. 

"You're tired," she notices, and from the way her nose turns up I know she can smell Fleabottom on me. "Your father took you into the city?"

"Yes, he wanted me to be there as he showcased his Goldcloaks," I tell her, choosing not to elaborate much further. "An eventful night of the kings justice being showcased." But as I reach out to help her the red staining my hand matches the dress.

She's silent as she looks at me, knowing very well what I'm not telling her.

"It-" there's no point excusing it. "My father does not want me getting soft."

"So he has you spill blood in the city streets?"

There's a protective bite to her voice.

"He believes I should know how to handle a blade," I argue. "If I was a man you would see no issue with it."

"Well your father lets you behave as one," she mutters under her breath, going to push my hand aside but her eyes fall to the floor as I see the red of her nails, an old habit worsened.

"It seems my father isn't the only one with expectations," I say, knowing very well the words of me behaving as a man are from her fathers mouth, but that's not what I'm concerned about. "How long Alicent?"

She quickly hides her nails from me. "It's nothing."

I look at her and see a truly sad girl, as if it's so inherent it's as much a part of her as her own heart. "You do not need to lie to me for fear of shame, it's me." She always tries so hard to please her father, to be the good and chaste influence on Rhaenyra. But she needs not be anyone else for me. "How long?"

"It- it's always been a bad habit, but I'll admit the past months it's gotten worse," she tells me shyly. "I just get so nervous-"

I hold her hands gently, looking down at them, at something she is so ashamed of. "You may be the most beautiful girl in Kings Landing and have a reputation to keep, but you are allowed to not have to seem so perfect."

My point is lost on her, for she stammers "Do you truly mean that?"

I just laugh at her naivety. "Well, I cannot speak for men but I can say with certainty after travelling the free cities you are still the most beautiful girl I've seen." She's at a loss for words and I smile. "Come now, show me your dress for the tournament."

~

Alicent and I sit side by side at the tournament, Rhaenyra deciding to be fashionably late. It's a beautiful day, yet an anxious one as Aemma has begun her labors. We sit at the front with Princess Rhaenys' children Laena and Laenor. I'm showing Laena a golden ring from Lys when Rhaenyra joins us, sitting on the other side of Alicent. 

"Has it started yet?" Rhaenyra asks, flaunting some jewellery of her own that intrigues Laena.

"What metal is that?" she asks, not recognising it and I can't blame her, for I doubt the child has ever seen anything like it.

"Valyrian steel," Rhaenyra replies with a smile as she touches her necklace. "Daemon gifted it to me."

Now that surprises me and I can't help but exclaim "He did?"

"Yes," she says with that coy tone she uses. "When you returned to the city."

My father never mentioned it to me, he surely did waste no gold in acquiring all sorts of Valyrian artefacts, he had spent weeks seeking a Valyrian steel dagger for my nameday, yet he never once mentioned a gift like this for Rhaenyra.

Alicent much catch the confusion in my eye for she tilts her head at me, but just as quickly as she goes to inquire the events begin. Rhaenyra gleefully watches the lancing but I sit there in contemplation. Rhaenyra is his niece yes, but such a gift is strange, even for my father.

Finally he is announced.

"Prince Daemon, Prince of the City!"

He rides past in his armor, and I look to Rhaenyra, who is practically blushing, it's then it dawns on me the affection she has for my father. An innocent fancy perhaps, but not one I expected my father to encourage with gifts.

Except of course he would.

I watch as he taunts the line of knights for his choosing, until finally he makes his choice. Alicent's brother.

"For his first challenge Prince Daemon chooses Ser Gwayne Hightower of Oldtown, eldest son of the Hand of the King."

Alicent immediately becomes anxious beside me and I reach for her hand, our fingers laced together hidden between the folds of our dresses. She is afraid and rightly so, for we both know it will be my father that wins, and will likely do so taking any chance he can to spite Otto Hightower. Sure enough I watch him look up at Otto before charging.

I'm cringing as my father upon taking a hit decides to play dirty, using his lance to take down the horse and Alicent gasps loudly as her brother is thrown to the ground. I hold her hand tight as she peers over, trying to see if he's alright all while I just shake my head at my father who smirks proudly as he rides over.

While I'm focused on Alicent it's Rhaenyra who gets up to greet my father, something else that rubs me the wrong way, something Alicent notices as we follow.

"Nicely done uncle," Rhaenyra praises.

"Thank you princess."

"Is being underhanded the only way you can win?" I taunt my father, not as impressed as Rhaenyra is.

"No but it's more entertaining," he replies, looking around at the crowd and decides to aggravate Otto further. "Now I'm fairly sure I can win these games Lady Alicent, your favour would all but assure it."

I purse my lips unimpressed as Alicent goes to get her favour while Rhaenyra holds my fathers eye, the tension between them almost making me sick. 

"Good luck, my prince," Alicent says placing her favour on his lance, uncomfortable beside me for only a moment before wearing a pleasant smile, and the tournament continues.

It's bloody and beautiful, pageantry alongside brutality. Whilst Alicent watches on in horror, and Rhaenyra lets out a gasp or two I watch on nubmly after having experienced the pure butchery at my fathers hands down in Fleabottom. 

In the midst of it I notice Alicent, her eyes fixed on the violence whilst picking at her nails and I take her hands in mine, she almost jumps at the touch, having been pulled out of her daze and I just squeeze her hands, no more needing to be said as we watch on.

My attention is caught by the knight Ser Criston Cole going against my father. A handsome man from what we've seen, secretly I hope he puts my father in his place, and he does. Although I can't help the shriek that escapes me as my fathers horse drags him along the railing, the sound awful as he hits the ground and this time it's Alicent gripping my hand tight.

A man goes to help my father to his feet only to be pushed to the ground, and I run to the balcony's edge as my father gets to his feet, almost maddened with the shame of being dishorsed. I watch wide eyed as he calls for his sword and Alicent and Rhaenyra both jump up and come to my side.

"Prince Daemon wishes to continue in a contest of arms!"

I look behind me for the king but he's nowhere to be seen, no one to stop this madness if it gets out of hand, which it no doubt will. Ser Criston faces my fathers sword with a mace and chain, breathing through fathers shield, the fight becomes hands on, more kicking and shoving than anything else until Ser Criston is on the ground and my father looks up at me, smiling and cheering as he claims victory. Only to have made the mistake of turning his back on his opponent, for he's knocked to the ground and he does something that surprises me. He yields. Not out of weakness, but almost, almost, out of something resembling respect for a good fight. 

It's then Ser Criston comes forward removing his helmet, the three of us share an exchange of pleasant surprise at the sight of him.

"Gods, he's Dornish," I hear Alicent exclaim while I can't help but appreciate the sight in front of us.

"I was hoping to ask for the favour of Lady Viserra," he says, not Rhaenyra's, but mine. "The daughter of the Prince."

Doing the same as my father, asking for the favour of his opponent's daughter. I can respect him for that. And so I'm smiling as I reach for my favour, my father watching on in amusement as I toss it down to Ser Criston. "Good fight Ser Criston, I wish you luck."

Rhaenyra can make eyes at my father all she likes, I'll give the Dornish knight my favour. But it's then I notice Otto Hightower returning and murmuring something to one of the council members. Alarm quickly spreads behind us, something Rhaenyra notices and I know it can only be one thing.

"Alicent," I say and she goes to her father who pulls her aside murmuring something to her, she looks back at us and there is no mistaking it.

The queen is dead.

"Rhaenyra," I immediately breathe, reaching for her, she's too shocked to cry but even so I take her in my arms, looking over her shoulder at Alicent in mutual horror. The two motherless girls have become three.

~

We sit together in Rhaenyra's room, Alicent and I sitting on the edge of her bed as she lies away from us, eyes wide open yet dead to the world.

"Baelor your father has named the boy," I tell her, treading gently. "Would you like to see him?"

She doesn't reply. Neither her or Viserys have seen the boy, he's in the care of wet nurses. I lost my mother the day I was born, I feel no pain for her, the pain I feel is for Aemma, the only mother I've ever had.

"We'll let you sleep," Alicent says gently, and we leave the room having done what we can for her, but she must mourn, there is no easy way to do so. When we're outside she asks me "Are you alright?"

I force myself to nod. "I loved the queen as my own mother, but it is Rhaenyra I worry for."

She nods in understanding, and reaches for me. "We have all lost a mother now. The pain... it does get easier."

I see the pain in her eyes, the loss of her own mother wounding her still, especially now. Silently I take her in my arms, needing someone to hold onto. In her embrace I feel safe enough to finally let the tears escape.

We stand there like that in silence until a guard comes.

"Lady Alicent, the hand has summoned you."

"Go," I tell her gently. "I'll be alright."

She nods, and is escorted by the guard to her fathers office.

In my loneliness I find myself walking to my fathers chambers, he will not be mourning, but I need him nonetheless. I need my father to hold me and tell me he understands, that it will be okay. He has never been affectionate in that manner, but he's always been there when I've needed him.

Yet when I come to his chambers he isn't there. 

And so in the shadow of mourning over the keep I find myself coming to the barracks of the Goldcloaks.

"My Lady," Ser Harwin says, recognising me. "Are you looking for the prince?" I nod meekly, like a child seeking out their parent after a bad dream. "He has taken to the Street of Silk."

"To the brothels," I correct, saying what we both know. "Thank you for your assistance."

"Would you like me to get him for you?" he offers and I shake my head, swallowing my bitterness.

"He is mourning in his own way."

~

Alicent and I stand side by side at the funeral, the babe having passed in the night after his birth.

My father stands separate from us, his eyes on Rhaenyra, as they should be since she has lost her mother, but I cannot forget the necklace, cannot forget the unspoken tension between them.

But today is not the day for that. Today we mourn.

Again after the funeral I seek out my father to find him missing, this time I don't bother searching for him, able to hear the ruckus of the Goldcloaks ascending on the Street of Silk.

So instead I go to Rhaenyra who stares numbly at a candle flame in her room, tears staining her cheeks.

"Come," I say, extending my hand to her. "Syrax and Darkfyre have not flown together in so long."

A shadow of a smile comes to her face as she nods and takes my hand, and together we find our way to the Dragonpit.

~

When we return the next morning with tired eyes and reeking of dragon as Aemma would say, I'm surprised to find Alicent waiting for me in my chambers.

Yet I'm more alarmed at her demeanour.

"Are you alright?" I ask, immediately jumping to the most likely reason. "Did you have a fight with your father?"

"Viserra," she says quietly, her voice a whisper. "There is something... I- I cannot confide it in anyone."

I look at her confused. "What of Rhaenyra?"

"Especially not Rhaenyra."

That's when my stomach drops at the guilt in her eyes, and so I reach out to take her hand with a promise "I'm not Rhaenyra."

When she looks back at me her brown eyes are filled with tears. "Promise me, promise you won't tell a soul."

I'd never considered myself to be one to take oaths seriously, but in this moment I know I'll take whatever she says to the grave. "I swear it."

And somehow, despite who my father is, despite who I am, she trusts me. 

"My father," she begins, voice weak. "He- he asked me to comfort the king."

A sentence that would sound so innocent if I did not know her, did not know her father. "Alicent-"

"I never touched him," she immediately insists, trying to defend herself even though there is nothing to defend. "I just read to him, I swear it, I would never-"

"Shhh," I say, pulling her in tight by her hands, trying to calm her. "I know, it is not me you need to defend yourself to."

That's when she breaks down "If Rhaenyra knew..."

She does not need to finish that sentence, for we both know well how she would react. She is rash, quick to temper, more my fathers daughter than I at times, she would take it as a betrayal and not let it go regardless of the truth.

"She doesn't need to know," I say, going against whatever morals Aemma tried to instil in me, honesty and integrity be damned. They are never things my father taught me. "Your father sent you to him, to his chambers?" She nods, not meeting my eye. "Nothing more happened, I believe that. You are not a seductress nor a mistress. You are a girl whose father is an ambitious man, this is his scheme not yours."

Her eyes are wide, afraid. "She won't believe that."

"But I do," I say, only then becoming aware of how close we are, and I take her face in my hands. "Our fathers despise one another for good reasons, my father is reckless and murderous and yours is calculating and starving for power, they are the second sons and always will be despite their best wishes. We do not need to be the pawns in their schemes."

She blinks at me confused. "Your father loves you, when has he ever used you?"

He hasn't. "You're right. My father merely wishes to rise me to his station, to Rhaenyra's, all he's done is try to make me a true Targaryen out of love. Your's would raise you to something far more dangerous, to be queen to further his own ambition."

She knows it, somewhere she must, but she sees little wrong. "What else is the purpose of a daughter?"

My heart breaks a little, breaks in realisation that my father may be the only one in Westeros who would never dream of marrying me off for his own standing, who would burn a man's city down before giving me as a bride. Then there's Otto Hightower.

It's then the door opens and there stands the bastard himself, the look on his face confuses me until I realise how he has caught us, in an embrace that would have me castrated if I was a man.

Alicent quickly drops my hands, lowering her head as her father enters and I stand there defiant at the man who would have his daughter, not even yet five and ten, a mistress for the king.

"Lord Hand," I say stiffly. "Is something the matter?"

If I was a man there certainly would be, but I am a girl, a girl found in an embrace with her companion. There is nothing wrong with it that he can justifiably make a fuss of.

But he seems not to mind, for there is already a smirk on his face. "Your father has been exiled."

I feel Alicents head whip around to me and I stand there, my blood turning cold as she grabs my arm and asks her father "What for?"

In Otto Hightower's eyes is the gleam of victory over my father, over me. He's basking in it.

"The heir for a day."

My head snaps up at those words, having heard my father remark them offhandedly after the funeral. "Where is the king?"

"You are not permitted to see him," he replies. "I have come to instruct you to pack your things, you may join your father or we can arrange for you to be taken to your stepmother in the Vale."

Alicent looks at her father in disbelief. "You can't mean-"

"I'm to be exiled as well?" I scoff, letting go of Alicent to confront her father. "Is this the king's order or yours?"

He pauses for just a moment too long and I'm pushing past him.

"Lady Viserra!"

I ignore him, running through the halls and attracting the attention of the Kingsguard who follow at the behest of Otto, yelling out orders from behind me, but it all stops the moment I enter the throne room and find Viserys sitting upon the throne.

"Uncle!" I cry out and he looks upon me in concern, out of breath and desperate as I come to my knees before the throne. "Uncle please, don't do this."

He sighs. "Viserra, if you are here to plead on behalf of your father-"

"What he said was regrettable, but exile?"

"It was not a decision I made lightly," he tries to reason. "I know you love your father, but you and I know better than any what sort of man he is."

"One who loves his brother and his king!" I argue getting to my feet as I hear Otto and the rest storming the throne room and even Viserys is alarmed by the sight. "Unlike this cunt here, who's revelling in getting rid of my father and I both!"

The throne room is silent until Viserys speaks. "Otto, did you tell the princess she is to be exiled along with Daemon?"

"She is no princess," he replies now my father is not here to take his tongue. "She is a bastard just as heinous as her father who will corrupt your daughter and mine both. Look at her now, causing a scene after I simply asked her to stay with her stepmother in the Vale."

Before Viserys can speak I turn to look at him, my voice as dangerous as my fathers. "If he were here he'd take your tongue." It's only then I see Alicent in the shadows watching on and something in my voice changes. "But I suppose that's the curse of second sons isn't it? To always be scraping at whatever scraps of power they can get? Even if it is throwing the daughter of your rival out of her own home behind the back of your king."

Viserys stands, voice as harsh as I've ever heard it. "I have lost my wife, I have lost my son, and now my brother. You would have my niece removed from this keep without my knowing? Have her taken from Rhaenyra's side as she is in mourning? All for the spite you bear her father!"

Otto is silent, having been put in his place by his king and a girl of four and ten.

Viserys must see Alicent in the shadows for he asks her "Lady Alicent, escort my niece back to her chambers."

I can almost feel Otto's blood boiling at his daughter being asked to wait on a bastard, but she doesn't see it that way, for she steps out of the shadows to take my arm.

"Thank you uncle," I say, leaving him and Otto to their devices. "But may I see my father off?"

A risky request, but he permits it. "Of course Viserra."

~

And so I find my father readying Caraxes at the dragon pit with a whore at his side.

"Father."

He turns to me, unsurprised to see me. "Good you're here, I've had the dragon keepers ready Darkfyre."

I just shake my head in disgust. "The heir for a day."

He sighs. "Yes I'll admit, it was distasteful, but it's said and done now. We're leaving for Dragonstone."

Something in the casualness of his voice makes something snap inside me. "And you never thought to come and get your daughter when you were being exiled?"

He merely shrugs. "I knew you'd find me."

"Except it was Otto Hightower who found me!" I yell and that gets his attention as he finally turns to look at me properly. "Is that how you wanted me to find out, him coming to my chambers revelling as he tells me we've both been exiled."

That's when it hits him. "If my brother-"

"Viserys was the one who fought for me, who stood up for me when Otto tried to have me exiled without his knowledge," I argue and scoff "While I had to defend myself against Otto Hightower in the throne room you were getting your whore and leaving me to the rats!"

The whore looks away as my father comes up to me, using a tone he rarely does. "Have you ever thought that my treatment of you is not neglect but rather faith? Faith that you don't need to be babied and managed like a child but instead treating you as you are, a dragon rider."

But I just look up at him, almost laughing with anger. "He called me a bastard, used it as justification to be rid of me. That I'm as heinous as you."

The look in his eye changes and his hand is on his sword. "If I was there-"

"You would have taken his tongue?" I finish. "Except you weren't. You were off with your whore, just like you were when you should have been with your brother mourning."

"It wasn't my wife who died, if it was I would have rented out the entire street to celebrate instead of three brothels."

I look at her, deciding to hit him where it hurts. "Try not to father another bastard seeing as you're content to damn the one you already have to a life of exile for a joke and a whore."

He grabs me, fingers bruising my arm, I try to pull it free but he doesn't let go. "Everything I have ever done is for you, and you fucking know it. If you want to be cruel so can I." I hold his eye, defiant. "I could be like Otto Hightower and sell you off the first chance that comes by, I could discard you, I could sell you to the brothels like bastard girls are. But here you are, a dragonrider and a Targaryen by name. The only reason that is, is because of me."

Despite the anger in his voice I see the fear in his eyes, the fear of losing the last person he has, the one who should love him unconditionally despite his sins.

"I'm staying here in Kings Landing," I say quietly, the cruellest words I could say at this very moment. He stares at me in disbelief, expecting me to follow it up with some type of contradiction, but I don't, and it's then he lets me go. "Did you ever realise Aemma was the closest thing I ever had to a mother?" He's silent, not realising I was mourning her also. "I needed you, and you ran off to the brothel to mourn the fact you had been disinherited. It would have only been for a day as you'd put so vocally if not for your own selfish desire to usurp what is Rhaenyra's."

I hit him where it hurts without realising it. "Do you think it was selfish wanting you to be my heir?"

"It was never about me, only you," I say with sorrow. "You know damn well a bastard would never stand to inherit the Iron Throne, and yet you would take it regardless of the crisis that would follow."

"I would," he says, without taking a moment to hesitate. "I would-"

"Have your niece?" I retort and for the first time I've caught him off guard. "I'm not blind, just disgusted." I look to his whore. "Don't be surprised if he tosses you aside for someone blonder and younger since he seems to desire girls who are barely bleeders."

He scoffs. "You make me sound horrible, this has nothing to do with desire."

"So you seduce your niece for the throne," I realise. "Because how could you ever truly be disinherited with her by your side?"

He ignores me, instead justifying it. "I have raised the greatest dragonrider there is, raised a true Valyrian, and yet despite you having every symbol of legitimacy you are still denied, no one would dare utter the word bastard if I stood to inherit the throne."

I see his delusion so clearly, even if it is spurned by love rather than ambition, it is still delusion.

"I have come to terms with what I am, now you must also."

With those words I turn my back on my father, my face does not betray how my heart cries but Darkfyre does. Her cries echoing as I return to the Red Keep.

When I make it back to my chambers it is not Rhaenyra or Viserys who stand there to offer comfort, but Alicent.

"I'm sorry," she says, but I have no more words left, instead walking into her embrace and holding her tight. Both of us bound now as the motherless daughters of second sons maddened by their own wants and ambitions.

Yet somehow the prospect is easier knowing I am not alone.

~

Days later we stand side by side as Rhaenyra is sworn as heir to the Iron Throne. My father has seized Dragonstone, a seat that should be her's now by right. He's gone while I remain.

And so I make the decision that will enrage my father, but one that is right.

"Lady Viserra Targaryen, daughter of Daemon Targaryen."

I step forward and kneel before Rhaenyra as I make my oath to her.

"I, Viserra Targaryen, swear to be faithful to King Viserys and his named heir, the princess Rhaenyra. I pledge fealty to them and shall defend them against all enemies in good faith and without deceit." I look up, knowing my oath is the one that has gathered the most attention of all in this room, a daughter betraying her father. "I swear this by the old gods and the new."

I stand and look Rhaenyra in the eye, my friend, my sister in all but name, and pray I have made the right decision.

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