#i fucking love welt omg

[junii-moony]

WELT IS THAT FUCKING GUY HOLY SHIT

[sweetandscarlet]

i want you to be rough with me | pt 2

notes: omg okay, i was not expecting the first post to get the kind of attention it did/is still doing, so thank you all sm for your feedback, it means a lot :’) @ilovehotactresses - ask and you shall receive!

enjoy you horny fucks.

warnings: 18+ mommy kink, blowjobs, cunnilingus, mentions of spankings, bruising, choking, face slapping, g!p wanda (using magic), breeding. minors DNI!

sunlight peaks through the drapes off the bedroom window which inevitably sturs you awake. your eyes flicker open and you feel strong arms around your waist tense and squeeze.

you slowly shift onto your back and immediately regret it as you hold back a wince at the contact. memories from the night before flash in your mind as you feel your body ache and your ass sting deliciously.

"malyshka? are you awake?" wanda asks, her voice hoarse with sleep.

you hum in response and slowly turn to face her.

the older woman's eyes flutter open and her warm gaze is fixated on nothing but you as she scans your languorous features. she adores you in this state the most, when you weren’t fully awake yet and it showed. when you lips were puffy from sleep, eyes drowsy and your hair messy displayed around you.

"you're so beautiful" you whisper and wanda wants to laugh at your coinciding thoughts.

freckled cheeks flush pink, eyes crinkling at the edges as pink lips turned upwards into a sweet smile. "as the kids would say, detka.." wanda raises her arms above her head as she lets out a groan and stretches. "you're a simp"

you laugh loudly at the unexpected response and bump her shoulder. "shut up, i'm being honest, idiot"

"watch your tone honey, i may be sleepy but i'll still beat your ass" wanda mumbles, her body relaxing as she stops stretching. she leans over, placing her head in your chest and cuddles into you.

you want to shoot back a remark at how her words don't match her actions but you simply refrain and bite your tongue. "oh please no, i'm in agony from last night"

wanda quirks an eyebrow and sits up, her weight resting on her elbow. "show me" is all she says and a shiver runs down your spine at how her pupils instantly dilate.

you turn over onto your side and feel the cold morning hair hit your skin as the redhead slowly peels back the covers. you hear her gasp softly behind you and you can only imagine what it looks like.

"aw poor detka, i've made quite the mark on you" wandas voice almost sounds empathetic as a hand rubs small circles on your ass, massaging it gently, but when a chuckle spills from her lips you just know she loves what she sees. "good, i'm glad"

wanda shifts down and peppers kisses down your back and a soft moan escapes your lips when you feel her tongue trailing over the purplish-blue marks and she leaves open-mouthed kisses on the welts.

"wanda" you whine, one of your hands reaching around to thread into thick red locks.

"there, all better" the older woman cooes, before moving upwards to peck your cheek. "now, let's go and make some breakfast"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

after weeks had passed you wanted to hit yourself for being so scared and not telling wanda sooner. the conversation you shared prior had brought you so much closer and god did it feel good.

you were now seated at the dinner table, wanda facing opposite you as you both dug into the delicious meal you had both prepped earlier. albeit, wanda was the real chef here; you just stood there and looked pretty, only moving when the redhead needed ingredients, etc.

you stabbed your fork into the chicken, humming at the taste as you took a bite.

“do you like the thought of breeding?” wanda asked curiously, staring at her plate as she cut into her food.

you sucked in a sharp breath and choked, pounding a closed fist into your chest as you forced the food down your throat and quickly took a sip of wine from your glass.

“i- shit, wanda. do you mind?”

wanda just chuckled in response before taking a bite of her own food. “sorry, darling. bad timing”

you kept the glass in your hand and soon enough you had gulped down the entire thing. you reached over and poured yourself a hefty serving, taking another sip and setting it back down next to your plate.

“wow, um, yes?”

the redhead tilted her head at that. “you don’t seem so sure”

your eyes fluttered shut for just a second, exhaling as the grip on your fork tightened. “yes, i’m sure. why do you ask?”

wanda shrugged and returned to eating the chicken that was left on her fork. “i was just thinking about it, that’s all”

you huffed in frustration at how she casually just admitted to thinking about something like that over dinner.. or maybe you were frustrated at how quickly your body reacted to her words. either way, you were frustrated and could feel your cunt now pulsing against your tight jeans.

“thinking about it, huh? care to share?” you ask, your voice thick with arousal.

“i was just thinking if i could do some sort of spell that would make one of our straps more.. life-like” wanda replies, lifting her head to gauge how you’d react to something new.

“life like?” you swallow hard, before taking another big gulp from your glass. “as in-“

“as in i’d feel you around my cock malyshka and i’d also get to shoot my cum inside of you”

holy shit.

“fuck” you breathe out, the grip on your fork getting intensely worse as it dug into the palm of your clenched hand. “is.. is that something you could do?”

wanda raised an eyebrow in delight at your question. “come with me little one”

the chair scraped against the wooden flooring below it as she pushed back with her legs and stood up. you followed suit, rounding the table quickly as you felt your legs turn into jelly.

your heart rate peaked as your body temperature shot up at the thought of what was about to happen next, eating dinner was now the last thing on your mind.

“i wasn’t exactly truthful just now.. i already did what i said i was thinking about, i just wanted to see if you’d be comfortable doing it” wanda announced, her voice low as she speaks.

she takes your hand, leading you upstairs and into your shared bedroom and as she pushes open the wooden door and all you’re greeted by is your empty, still neatly made bed. you half expected toys laid out on the bed but alas, there was nothing.

you turn to her, confusion written across your face and all she does is chuckle. the action makes your head spin and you can't help but wonder where this supposed magical strap was.

"don't worry darling" wanda starts as she reaches a hand to rest on your shoulder, the touch lingers for a second before it grabs a fist full of your hair and before you know it you're forced to walk towards the bed and thrown face first. "it's coming, but first let's get you all ready and stretched out"

a whimper falls from your lips at the mere thought of being filled up by her and all you can think about is the fact that you do not need any kind of foreplay. you could feel yourself tightening around nothing as wetness soaks your underwear.

you say nothing in response and simply lie there and wait for wanda to rid you of your clothes and find out for herself.

soon enough, the redhead's hands were on the waistline of your jeans, your body automatically raising your hips so she could unbutton them. she slowly pulled them down, placing open-mouthed kisses on the back of your thighs as she follows them until the denim pools at your ankles.

your mouth falls open in a gasp at her touch and your hands scrunch the sheets underneath you. "please don't tease"

wanda ignores your begging as she pulls the pants off completely. you know damn well she's doing it on purpose, she could easily leave you bare with a flick of her wrist, just like she's done many times before.

instead, she's taking her time with you and it's like torture as you patiently wait for what was promised.

"i can't wait to feel you squeeze around me, maylshka" the older woman states, her hands moving back to your waist as she swiftly flips you over to face her. "to feel you throb and clench while i pound your tight little cunt, god, i've been thinking about it for so long"

you don't even have time to linger on what she says.

wanda's hand grips tightly around your throat and pulls you close to her. you feel her hot breath hitting your face and you lick your lips in anticipation.

"take it off" she growls, releasing your neck from her hold and like your life depended on it, you quickly pull your t-shirt over your head. wandas eyes drop down to your breast sitting perfectly in a red lacey bra.

"you're so fucking beautiful, y/n, just look at you"

wanda's hand lands on your shoulder to hold you still and the other slaps you roughly across your right cheek. "mommy wants to feel your mouth first"

you close your eyes, ignoring the sting as your mouth waters at the thought. you hear the sound of clothes dropping to the floor and when your eyes shoot open in curiosity you can see wanda standing in front of you, completely bare.

your eyes travel down her body taking it all in like it's the first time all over again. they soon widen when they land on what you can only describe as the hottest thing you have ever seen in your life.

between her legs, she stands tall and proud, her hands come to land on her hips as she looks down to appreciate her masterpiece. "so what do you think little one?"

you swallow hard as you take her all in. she gives you a playful shimmy before taking a step closer to you. "want a taste?" she asks, a knee resting on the bed as she lifts herself up onto the mattress and hovers over you.

as if you're drawn to it like a moth to the flame, you eagerly sit up until you're staring directly at her newfound member.

you swallow hard, eyes flickering up to meet her gaze. "may i?"

wanda nods in response and you can almost see a small crack in her facade appear when your tongue sticks out to flick over the head of her cock teasingly.

"be as greedy as you want, moya lyubov', but.." wanda lifts a finger under your chin and tilts your head upwards. "don't forget, if you ever want to stop, say the word and we will"

“yes, mommy. i won’t forget” and it was true, as much as she turned your brain into mush, you always remembered ‘scarlet’.

the gentle reminder she gave you warmed your heart at how much you could trust this woman, something you had never experienced before in past relationships.

wanda wrapped her slender fingers around her throbbing cock and eyed you carefully as she lined it up with your already waiting and open mouth.

not wanting to waste anymore time you moved your head forward and engulfed her in your mouth. the action caused wandas’ own to drop open in a long wanton moan as she threw her head back at the newfangled pleasure.

“oh my god detka, you feel so good”

you hummed around her cock, bobbing your head up and down. the older woman’s hand grasped a fistful of your hair and groaned feeling her tip hit the back of your throat.

“just like that, y/n. you’re taking mommy so well”

the praise only spurred you on further as you picked up your pace, eager to please your girlfriend.

wandas lets out a shaky breath and before you knew it you were pushed hard onto your back as it hits the mattress below you.

“god if your mouth feels like that..” wanda trails off, imagining what it would also feel like in your pretty little cunt.

you bend your knees and slowly spread your legs open until you’re on full display for the woman above you.

“you’re dripping already, malyshka” the redhead cooes, shifting on the bed until she’s lying down on her front, elbows propped up; licking her lips as she comes face to face with your pussy.

you let out a needy whimper, waiting in eager anticipation to have her mouth on you.

you don’t wait long before she swipes a long lick through your slit and she immediately starts lapping at you like a puppy, the taste of you making her head spin.

your hand flies to the back of her head, red locks entwined in your fingers as she hardens her tongue and circles your clit, taking it between her lips to suck hard.

you’re already embarrassingly close and you try to push the feeling away but when the coil in your stomach twists and turns and your body temperature rises you just know you won’t last long due to her relentless pace.

“mommy, i- i’m gonna cum please stop” you beg pathetically.

wandas lips twitch into a smirk and ignores your pleas. you know the safe word and if you really wanted to stop, you’d say it. “don’t worry, little one. you can cum on mommy’s face”

she continues working her magic, drawing long strokes up and down, shaking her head side to side as she does. you cry out at the feeling, your toes curling and you grip harder on her head, pulling her closer to you until she’s entrapped between your legs.

“i’m gonna.. fuck” you arch your back into her mouth and cum with a loud moan. your body twitches and shakes but wanda doesn’t stop, she sucks and licks at your clit and helps you ride out your orgasm.

the need for oxygen nags at her mind but she ignores it until your body settles and relaxes back onto the bed.

your mind is hazy and clouded as you come down from your high and you let out a deep sigh, feeling your legs vibrate at the side of her head.

“someone really needed that, huh?” wanda chuckles lightly, licking her lips as she pulls away.

she leans in for a bruising kiss, and you moan at the taste of you on her tongue. wandas’ cock accidentally nudging your clit as she leans in to deepen the kiss and your hips jolt at the contact.

“such a good girl, are you ready for me malyshka?” the redhead asks.

you nod desperately before quickly leaning back in, already missing the feeling of her lips against yours.

wanda reciprocates immediately as she shifts closer to you. her arm slides between your body and she takes her cock in her hand, moving it up and down between your folds, collecting the wetness on her tip.

a groan falls from her lips at the feeling and she wants to yell herself for not admitting to thinking of this idea sooner. “i can’t wait to fuck my cum into you, little one”

one of wandas hand's wraps around your throat as she slowly pushes herself in, wanting to feel herself fill you inch by inch. your mouth falls open in a silent gasp at the sudden intrusion and god did it feel.. different.

she felt warm inside of you and you could feel her pulse and throb. wandas’ hips comes to a halt when her stomach presses against your clit and you had to admit, feeling her instead of the usual silicone you’re used to was like a fever dream. it had only just started and you knew you already wanted to do it again.

“oh my god, wanda. this is..” you look up and all you can see are red irises staring intently down at you. yep, definitely the hottest thing that’s ever happened in your entire life.

“i know baby” the redhead groans, feeling you tighten around her. “you feel amazing”

she starts moving her hips back and forth and all you can do is lie there and pant at the feeling of her cock filling you up with every thrust. her pace quickly picks up and before you know it she’s jackhammering into you.

the hand around your throat tightens and the other flies to your waist to hold you in place. “god, look at you, y/n” she moans long and loud. “my perfect little cock whore”

wandas head drops to your shoulder, her pace slowing suddenly slowly to fuck into you long and hard. every snap of her hips hits that soft sensitive spot inside of you and you can’t help but roll your eyes at the feeling.

“mommy just like that”

wandas lips attach to your neck, sucking dark purple marks onto your soft skin as she whispers “you like being fucked hard by my cock, detka? dirty fucking slut” into your ear.

“yes yes, don’t stop”

“i’m not stopping until i’m painting your walls with my cum, moya lyubov'. i want you to take every single drop”

excitement and anticipation builds in your chest at the promise.

wanda groans again, feeling you squeeze around her and now she’s back at your neck, licking and sucking sloppily as she continues her hard thrusts.

you feel your pussy ache deliciously at the abuse when every thrust smacks your pussy hard and you can’t help but move your legs to wrap around her waist.

a whimper escapes wandas lips as she feels herself move deeper inside of you and your head grows fuzzy at the effect you’re having on the woman, who’s usually strong and composed no matter the situation.

everything’s too much; the air around you grows thick as you both pant breathlessly, the wet slapping sounds echoing throughout the room and the strong scent of sex and sweat is all you can smell.

“i- i’m close again, mommy”

wanda whimpers once more before uttering a “cum with me, pretty girl” against your neck, hot breath hitting your skin.

that’s all it takes for you as tears threaten to spill at another hard orgasm hitting you. ecstasy courses through you and you shut your eyes as it overwhelms every nerve in your body.

wanda follows suit, her grip on your body tightening as her pumps become sloppy and she cums with a loud moan as she feels herself shoot hot loads inside of your pulsing cunt.

“holy fuck, holy fuck” the redhead groans, the sinful words falling from her lips like a chant as her body tenses at the sensation.

her head falls to rest against your forehead and all you both can do is lay there, pant against each other's lips as you fight to catch your breaths. moments pass and your bodies soon relax and grow limp as you start to come down from such intense highs.

“wow” you whisper. the only world you can possibly conjure right now.

“wow indeed” wanda retorts in a gasp.

you watch as red irises fade back to their usual beautiful piercing green and your heart flutters at the action.

“i love you malyshka, so much”

“i love you too, wands” your lips turn upwards into a grin and you shift onto your elbows to peck her cheek. “..and your magic”

[whyareyouhere66]

Omg wait I love JJ he deserves more recognition I swear- So I have request for him! <3

Friends to lovers JJ Maybank x male reader with JJ getting into a fight and reader patching him up and ends up kissing his wounds better.

(I just want to pepper his face in kisses he’s so pretty 😔)

You and me are so the same because it’s just the small soft moments- oml the small soft moments with this man

JJ Maybank x male reader - Kiss It Better 

CW: suggested violence, cuts/bruises (vague) JJ is shirtless (not in the suggestive way it’s mentioned like twice) I don’t know if you wanted a big kiss with this too but hey why not it’s cute

x

It was the middle of the afternoon when he showed up, bruising and bleeding at your front door. 

Some random Tuesday afternoon, you were home alone with the tv playing and a freshly empty plate sitting on your lap, when he knocked on your door.

“Coming, coming.” You mumbled, the knocks had continued with a sort of anxiousness behind them. It wasn’t until you did open the door that you understood why.

“Hey- woah.” JJ stood at your doorstep, with puffy eyes and scars littering his skin. Immediately, your eyes widened, and you ushered him inside.

“What happened, J? Are you alright-?” You rushed to ask, leading him to the couch where he stumbled to the cushion.

“Fight, kook, it was bad.” Is all he said in summary, leaning into the comfortable back rest and slouching. While his eyes closed, looking busted as fuck on your couch, you looked over the various welts and scars across his face.

“Looks pretty bad…” you mumbled, eyes jumping from the small bump on his forehead to the purple bruise on his cheek.

“Yeah, alright, bathroom.” 

Which is how you winded up with an injured, shirtless, JJ Maybank sitting on your bathroom counter, back to the mirror, watching with a raised eyebrow as you sorted through the first aid kit that had been tucked into the cabinets. 

“How many bandaids can a person have…” he mumbled, head rolled to the side and leaned against the mirrors surface. 

“Depends how many cuts there are,” You nodded at the red mark running across JJ’s thumb, “hand please.”

The blonde complied without any protest, watching with faint interest while you gently spread the bandaid across his roughed up skin. You don’t let go of his hand, either, instead turning to the red that stained JJ’s knuckles and examining them closely.

“I’m gonna need the Neosporin for this.” At that, JJ groaned. 

“I know, so horrible.” You remarked sarcastically, almost smiling at your friend as you uncapped the small yellow tube, bringing it close to the scars strewn across JJ’s hand. “Stay still.” 

“It stings like a bitch.”

“I can’t imagine the fight was much better.” 

JJ shifted, repositioning himself on the smooth counter and trying to ignore the burning sensation that came from the medicine. 

“Is there not any other way-“ with a sigh, you set down the tube. 

“What, you need someone to kiss it better?” You asked in a teasing voice. 

JJ shifted around again, his thighs brushed against your hips. 

“Well…”

You paused, and looked at him for a moment. 

His voice wasn’t teasing, like it would be normally- instead, it had sounded almost bashful.

Oh.

He didn’t look at you, so you took the opportunity and gently lifted his hand to your mouth. It seemed to have startled him a bit, feeling your lips agains this knuckles- but soon butterflies followed, for he made direct eye contact with you as you did it.

Each knuckle, one by one, got a small kiss to the sensitive skin. Then, one on the bandaid covering his thumb, before you moved to the next hand.

He watched, eyes glossed over with something he wasn’t even sure he could name, and savored the feeling. 

But then, you’d gotten each scar and bruise on his hand. A quick glance down or his torso, blood rushed to your cheeks.

“I’m not getting those ones.” You said, though your hands betrayed you when they settled on his hips. 

His mouth was still slightly agape, his mind left behind to when your mouth was on his hand, like some sort of prince.

“You missed my face.” He blurted out, before he could even think. Both of you quickly became hot in the face. 

Tension grew thick in the confines of your bathroom walls, your waist still tucked comfortably in between his legs. 

He stared at you, waiting. 

Slowly, with a hitched breath, you leaned in until your lips brushed the tender skin across his cheek. And you let your lips rest there, just for a moment, pulling away only an inch or so because any further and you’d still be sucked back into his warmth. 

JJ felt small tingles across his cheek, you had been so close to his face. 

He felt as your lips drifted, ghosting over his skin as to meet another scar- this time the long one tracing his cheekbone. JJ’s eyes fluttered shut, internally building up his courage. 

‘Do it, now, damn it-‘

Before you could lean closer and give that cut the same treatment as the other, JJ ducked his head down and pulled your face the opposite direction- to his lips. 

A bit chapped, but still smooth and oh so addictive, his lips caught yours and quickly pulled you to him indefinitely.

Your eyes widened, suddenly being surrounded by his everything, his warmth, his touch. It didn’t take you longer than a few seconds before you leaned into it. 

Your right hand drifted from his thigh to the dip of his hipbone, dancing around the sore bruise in your way- you fit into each other so perfectly. 

At first, he’d pulled away after a few seconds or so. “Shit, I’m sor-“

But you pulled him right back, you’d waited so long, you can’t let it end now. And it was so soft, sweet- you didn’t want to let go yet.

By the time you both pulled away, you’d gotten so close that you couldn’t move more than an inch or two from his face, while you caught your breath. 

“Feel any better?” You asked, after a minute. He grinned, and it spread right back to you. 

“Much.”

A small hum, and your hand rested on his cheek. You pecked the remaining cuts along his face- his nose, his forehead, cheekbone- the kiss giving you a burst of courage to let yourself linger on his skin longer.

“Good.”

[herzlak]

Tatort Dortmund: Cash (REWATCH)

second time trauma :)

one thing about jan is, dass er in jeder szene entweder aussieht als würd er gleich heulen oder als wär er auf drogen

okay stopp hatte der fussballer n pride schweissband?

JA OMG! here's to tortmund's gay hint tradition

"was du heute kannst entsorgen" und dann cut to jan pawlak is my favourite thing about cash

triggert mich so hart, dass jan rosas anruf wegdrückt... like girl, du hast echt NICHTS aus liebe mich gelernt

dieser kleine ktuler mit der "ich hab schon ganze zwei neue neue deutsche welle songs geschrieben" frisur ist scho cute

"ach??" "wirklich???" "wir gehen!!!!" ROSA I LOVE YOU

to quote my bestie "jan ist wie so n nerviges kleines kind, dass dich dauernd fragt, ob du spiele auf deim handy hast"

finds so lustig, dass ihnen nach drei jahren mal wieder eingefallen ist, dass rosa ja mikromimik lesen kann

"aufmachen! polizei!" HALT DEIN MAUL JAN DU UNLUSTIGER SAFTSACK

NIEMAND würd dich vermissen!!! *proceeds to miss jan very much*

"und noch n zwanni fürn automaten" OH MEIN GOTT SEI EINFACH LEISE

der macht mich so aggressiv der pawlak

okay aber als ob jan so ne musik hört

für mich hört der mac miller und ekkstacy

schatzi, der jan greift dauernd leute tätlich an, der hat nora geschubst, der hat ella und rosa und auch dich am arm gepackt

"fick dich" lol king

fabers ermittlungstaktik isses einfach seine enemies anzuschwulen

"was ich privat mache" als wär seine arbeit nur so n hobby nebenbei junge

counting "pferderennen" as masken reference

spuckt der auch noch aufn boden ey

wollnsiemichverarschenoderwas?!?!

allein wegen jan gibt's jetzt immer klare sprache version vom tatort

ok "aber an mir lässt sies aus" hab ich definitiv überhört letztes mal

"können wir nich abhauen?" auch

wenn jan zumindest körperlich anwesend wär

wieso isn rosas pinker textmarker eigentlich in jan stiftehalter?

mir egal was die enraged boomers sagen, ich finds ganz toll, dass rosa gendert

und, dass faber es versucht lol

so süß wie sie in der ecke steht und sich die nase reibt like "hihi :)"

ich hab rosa einfach so lieb, es is unreal

missed opportunity, dass rosa und faber sich nicht den ball zugepasst haben

sevilla, digga.

counting the "hey" as heile welt ref-

"meister :D"

"was sachste?" "was sachter?"

"den ess ich noch" FABER I LOVE YOU

ich LIEBE diese parallelen bei den verhören im dortmund tatort, die sagen immer irgendwas, was man auch aufs ermittlerteam beziehen kann

ey rosas erste frage ist "hast du was mit der?" UND DANN BIN ICH VERRÜCKT, WENN ICH HERZLAK SHIPPE?

dieses lila colour grading in der szene........

now kiss!

was soll denn jan für überstunden abfeiern??

drehbuch so: *rosa relieved "endlich isser weg" exhale*, dann *rosa ptsd "fuck ich werd wieder verlassen" exhale*

finds ganz wundervoll, wie oft wir in cash rosas dutt von hinten sehen

important fact: rosa ist irgendwann nach liebe mich umgezogen

faber einfach die therapeuten pipeline hingelegt

macht mich soo glücklich wie rosa da so sau wütend auf das auto einschlägt :>

verständlich, dass das steffi liebste szene war

"ich teil halt gern mit meinen freunden" mhm

okay wait, ist des das zweite mal, dass jan sich blöd verplappert hat und deshalb noch wer ermordet wird? zorn parallel?

cash ist echt ne einzige parallele, i love it

"turteltäubchen" AND THEN YOU EXPECT ME NOT TO SHIP THEM-

faber so: get in line, ich hab schon viele leute wütend gemacht

rosa ist so richtig schön zickig in cash, ich liebs so sehr

bin immer noch der meinung, dass jan trotzdem abgerutscht ist und das nicht alles gespielt war

seriously, guckt ihn an, der lappen kann niemals so gut schauspielern

"frau dingenskirchen" <3

"wir sind immer noch ein team" rosa, nein :/

funfact: rosas sweatshirtjacke ist die von jan aus tollwut, sie hatse nur versehentlich zur grünen wäsche

(funfact: der funfact war gelogen)

hol den baseball schläger, fabermaus!

nimm den baseball schläger mit, rosamaus!!!

dünnes eis, iramaus

die is so kackendreist die frau

"weinen hilft nicht" doch???

hachhh jan mit rosas armband <3

andere seniorinnen häkeln oder machen kreuzworträtsel, britta zeigt wöchentlich ihren schwiegersohn an

"wenn du hilfe brauchst, dann..." :(

tut schon weh, wie lieb jan sie anlächelt

alles an dieser szene tut weh tbh

steffi und rick spielen einfach zu gut :<

rosa sieht aus als hätt sie die halbe nacht geheult :|

sie guckt so süß aawwww!! :3

okay graf tot, abakay eingekastelt, wen soll faber jetzt anschwulen?

die tatsache, dass die klasnic ihren kaffee mit deM STIEL VON NER GABEL UMRÜHRT

dass jan n armband von rosa dabei hat, bedeutet mir scho so n bissl die welt <3

gps. hat sie gesehen. mädel, du wirst auch noch kommissarin

honestly, ich will in fünfzehn jahren jana giesel irgendwo als lead role im tatort sehen, die spielt jetzt schon so toll

HALT DIE FRESSE MIT SEVILLA JAN DU DISAPPOINTMENT AUF ZWEI BEINEN

ich hoffe er kriegt fett sonnenbrand der elende vampir

und ich hoffe, er kommt irgendwann wieder zurück für die allerletzte folge :(((

nächste folge wissen wir dann nicht, wen wir zuerst mitm baseball schläger kloppen - die klasnic, matuschek, haller oder die bütow

(am besten alle, weil gewalt ist therapeutisch wie wir gelernt haben)

[olgalenski]

Polizeiruf Rostock - Nur Gespenster

ich bin absolut bereit und überhaupt nich aaaaahh es wird super

joooa... gut. das ist äh n anfang

KATRIN HI

seit wann klingt pöschi so alt? war das letzte Folge auch so? bin ich verwirrt, weil ich letztens die eine Folge aus 2014 gesehen hab? (ws einfach 9 jahre her is wtf)

melly was

thiesler ist immer noch mit vivien zusammen alright

meine güte thiesler

mellys gesichtsadrücke sind immer so lustig ich liebs.

naja ins wort gefallen is sie dir ja nich wirklich. ihr habt einfach gleochzeitig angefangen zu reden und sie war schneller. also klar hätte sie mal achten können dass du was sagen willst aber ich würde jetzt nicht sagen sie ist dir ins wort gefallen naja

es hat schon was mit ihm zu tun. also like 2 frauen an der spitze find ich gut. aber dann hats halt was mit ihm zu tun

und ja thiesler vielleicht hast du recht aber jetzt komm mal klar. wenns dich so sehr stört kündige halt oder lass dich versetzen

warum steckst du ihr sowas in den briefkasten? like ich weiß dass du ihr vater bist und so aber hallo? schreib halt n actual brief??????

:((((

khdfkghägfk seit wann trägt sie ne brille? seh ich die öfter? bitte lass mich sie öfter sehen

melly sag das doch nich so omg gjbsfäjhsagjsvbg hgöj

ja weiß nicht vllt aus dem selben grund aus dem sie vor 15 jahren verschwunden ist. kp ob wir den kennen aber weißt

was sagt er nich?

jetz kann er wieder lachen is ja klar einmal n lob bekommen welt is wieder heile

wollte sie jetzt nach amsterdam oder nach barcelona? ODER hat sie unterschiedlichen leuten was unterschiedliches gesagt?

mein dude verfolg sie halt nich und steck ihr was in breifkaste. like schreib halt n brief wenn du eh weißt wo sie wohnt hab ich schonmal gesagt aber come on

T_T KATRIN MY LOVE jemand muss sie umarmen es is doch scheiße ey

ich war grad okay damit dass sascha weg is und alles was ich denken kann is, dass er da sein soll wenns ihr scheiße geht man. er is doch der einzige der von ihrer vergangenheit weiß T_T

wild dass mein geburtsjahr auf dem grabstein steht

okay thiesler doch keine heile welt oder was? wenn sie dich lobt is alles cool aber sonst nicht oder wie?

hmmmmm i don't like this.

heheheh melly

tja thiesler doof für dich jetzt

"Huch" ja das is auf jeden fall die passende reaktion auf so ne info

zum glück stören spinnen mich erst aber ner gewissen größe

ahhhh fuck

finde es sehr gut dass sie sprachnachrichten verschicken, dann muss ich mich über diese fake UI von den textnchrichten aufregen, die nie vorherige nachrichten haben.

SIE ERZÄHLT ES MELLY HALLO

ich liebe die vibes zwischen melly und katrin okay

uff

hat er sie einfach am strand vergraben????

go off katrin

yo what the fuck

aaaaahhhhhhhhhh

[quandaryqueen]

Any riddler's

W a close friend who constantly does or almost does something stupid

Close friend definitely has hearing problems from how many times they misheard stuff like

"Go carts?" "..." "..." "...I said vocals." "oh"

Forgets stuff, like, there was this one time where they were searching for their phone using their phone's flashlight

"Have I told you this before?" Yes they have, about 5 times or maybe more in fact, they're veryyy forgetful

BUT despite that they're tremendously smart in different areas, just incredibly forgetful at times which is most of the time

In my defense, it's been three days since I slept

Batman Unburied Edward Nygma X Reader

A platonic piece! I love writing for them omg thank you for this request! This following piece is inspired by things that happened to me so, now you have an idea how stupid this bitch can be.

💚 He loves you, oh he loves you... But seeing you somehow trip on your own feet and somehow land in a canal made him undergo an asthma attack from laughing too hard. After getting his inhaler, he might just grab your hand and pull you out of it (after wiping it with a towel and spraying a hefty amount of sanitizer).

Then you somehow slip and fall back again. He laughs again, almost kills himself in the process, recovers, then helps you back again.

That's it. That's the relationship in a nutshell. And boy, does he always laugh when he's with you.

💚 And it never gets old, fucking hell you find ways in how to be so damn unpredictable when it comes to these things. Sometimes you'd be as agile as a cat, but sometimes you would be so damn clumsy... Like a cat. Huh, two sides of the same coin.

It's fun to watch you, he knows when to laugh and when not to, as he's been friends with you for so long. There are times the laughing was a mere instinct in the midst of a tumultuous moment upon attempting to register what he just saw or to at least alleviate tensions... Sometimes that laughter takes a few minutes as he replays what he had saw.

💚 But in his defense! He always helps you up... And lets out a snicker. And will later remind you of said events and watch embarrassment flood your features upon recalling it, then your mind starts to drift back to the faces of strangers looking at you weirdly for tripping at nothing.

It's top tier entertainment for Edward. He's a good friend, I swear

"Remember that time you walked into a glass door?"

"Not now, Ed," You wince when he brought it up, remembering how you burned under the scrutiny of onlookers. Not to mention, it left a nasty welt and a bruise to be reminded of it.

"Then when you to find the door, you ended up walking through another glass?"

"FUCK OFF!"

💚 Anyways, not only that, as your mind tends to run during the day and what came of it, were random blurts of words Edward finds absolute golden.

What the fuck was running in your mind that you'd pause in the middle of a task, stare off into the void and let your thoughts run... Edward interrupts your train of thought with a randomness of his own, resulting you to say the most random threads of questionable, yet entertaining semantics.

💚 Here's a little example:

Of course, you were once again staring into space and Edward saw the perfect opportunity to make you jump out of your wits. Your back was turned against him, it was perfect for him to catch you off guard.

Light as a feather, he takes gentle steps as to not disrupt you of your daydream yet. His hands were held out with malicious intent, and slowly, he closes in on you...

"BAH!" he exclaims, hands grasping your shoulder.

"AH 'XPLODING PUSSIES!"

... he does not have an inkling of idea of what you were thinking about, but god continue being such an intriguing little klutz.

💚 Mishearing things are a common occurrence if you're as dumbly deep in day dream as me. Here's an example:

There was a celebration of sorts hosted by Penguin, Edward recalls making you tag along because, according to him, would help ward off people with romantic intentions, hoping the sight of you by his side without confirming anything would successfully dismay them. Edward did not mention the fact that he can't stand some of the guests there and with you being there makes it more bearable.

You didn't mind, you yourself attended the event with personal intention... Namely, the cute performer by the name of Darius Chapel performing in the Iceberg Lounge that night. The darling of the crowd himself.

Well, you were dressed to the nine's, even garnering Edward's approval... Meaning, he was less critical about your fashion choices but I digress— you looked so fucking bomb.

You were seated at a table with Edward, along with a few guests. The most important man, Oswald Cobblepot, just seated beside you. Eventually, Darius came to join the table after performing and you were a sight to behold, giggling like a little school girl with their school girl crush and school girl daze and school girl day dream.

"Another great year. I propose a toast!" One of the guest raises their glass.

"Cheers!"

In your simping head, make up an appearance, you suddenly sat up from your seat, which had everyone in the table glance at you with furrowed brows. They watch you step away from your seat and walk away. All glanced at Edward, who was only as confused as they were when you returned to the table carrying a stack of monoblock chairs.

"What are those?" Edward questions.

"Chairs."

A short laugh was pulled from his throat before he can even respond. "Honey, he said 'cheers' not chairs."

... No one has let you live it down.

💚 When he laughs with you during your little accidents, there's still the underlying sense of concern he has for you. He hopes you know he cares, even after he is laughing up a storm that he triggers an asthma attack.

So after you trioo for the umpteenth time, it's expected he laughs, helps you to your feet, and does the 'lovingly calls you an idiot while patching you up' kind of thing, even throwing in reassurances... Or his way of reassurances.

"I am so dumb, oh my god. What the fuck did I tripped on? Nothing!"

"Oh don't worry. No one saw you this time, I promise!"

"That doesn't even make it less worse!"

💚 This Edward is less of an elitist in terms of intelligence compaired to his other counterparts, he is more understanding about how some people are more intelligent in their ways. He also does not go out of his way to make others feel bad and put himself on a pedestal because of it.

Because of your nature to trip over nothing and stare into space and lost in your train of thoughts, others have tendancies to call you names... Which Edward fucking hated, because he knows you're more than the stumbling idiot everyone assume you as.

I firmly believe that he would be that friend that will subtly set up a scene that he knows you'll fucking dominate. So he'll put up a riddle he knows you can answer and watch in satisfaction as the others jaws drop at the sight of you answering that riddle without a second thought, and being fucking correct.

💚 In the end, he loves you because you make him laugh.

[des-no9]

Your fic is the only thing that is getting me through my fic and this paragraph-

“If you think I will leave her side again after that first time,” slides his palms over Orpheus’ mouth, sees the satisfaction of the pressure, cover, “only for Vlaakith to take her from me,” (like you like she did with me) touches the faded welts left behind of his muzzle, his shackles, “then maybe you do have to learn me all over again, t’var.

- is making me fucking feral.

Omg 🥹😭💜💜 I can't tell you how much joy this message brought me. Thank you SO much honestly. I'm so happy you enjoyed that fic. It filled a delightful little niche I'd been wanting explore for a while.

Thank you so SO much again 💜💜💜 I loved that bit especially. It felt very like...Voss cementing the reality of how much he feels for both of them to Orpheus. I'm so fond of that fic. Happy writing, lovely. I hope it's going well!!!!

[tablefourtyone]

I love the Nagazora arc and the way it all played out, and how well it worked out for KiaMei at the very end of part 1. In a crack nutshell:

Kewvin: Kiana's part of my Kaslana legacy full of musclebrains that could easily bring back the Leeroy Jenkins meme if they weren't naturally talented at clobbering Honkai dead with a baseball bat. Also cores are bad, you should do something about that, I TOTALLY can't do anything about them, just don't clarify that with your crippled friend and her gundam weeaboo mentor.

Mey: OMG MY POOR KIANA CHAN 😭😭😭

Kerbin: Come join the Dark Side, I have tons of subscribers and Elysia

May: I'll think about it one minute passes I'll do it

Einstein: Wait a second. You're letting your relationship with Kiana define 99% of your existence and agency in the narrative which loves to write you like this for some brainless reason. Wallowing in misery is turning you into a two-dimensional angstlord. Let me help you. I want to save Kiana's life.

Tesla: Me two

Aunty Teri: She has other people in her life plus a family that cares for her safety and wellbeing, in case you and the writers forgot. You're not exactly alone in your grief here.

Bronya: I exist and I also care, and I fought that Kewpie guy with Mr. Welt so I know if he's BSing you about not being able to yank out Kiana's cores himself or not.

Mee: everybody stfu it's my arc and my wangsty opera solo about my skill issues, only me myself and i and what kiana means to me matter, nothing and nobody else matters! nobody understands her better than me, we're endgame herrscher soulmates that can erase everyone if we want to and i'm pretty sure we did in a bad ending but whatever, it's me and her against this cold cruel world that suffers wangsty fools like us, baby!

Kanai: Nope, I've got realistic problems and emotions to deal with atm. G'bye moesenpai sorry not sorry

Meo: chases kiana and fights to the music of codependency

Thunderhead: hey. hey kid. you want edgey battlesuit?

Meh: i tried so haaaaard and come so faaaaar and in the end I had to be a Herrscherrrr

Kania: Meansenpai wai the 180 hostility and violence and resting honkai diva bitchface T_T

RaidenMeiThunderthighs: I'M NOT SAYING BECAUSE GO FUCK YOURSELF. KICKING AND BEATING YOU IN THE FACE AND TELLING THE AUDIENCE THAT I'M DOING IT BECAUSE I CARE ABOUT YOU ISN'T CRINGE. SEE YOU IN SIX MONTHS, STAY PRETTY AND REGRESSIVELY STUPID FOR ME

People who neither play GGZ nor ship them: This fight is horribly written, and caters specifically to the GGZ crowd.

[celiastjamesoscar]

Professors either are your best friends or your ultimate enemy. That dude needs to take a chill pill. He probably gets off on causing his students misery. Jon, on the other hand, seems so cool and like a fun dude! His love for pictures is everything, I adore it. If you can talk to him about gambling then he's really a chill guy. 4 finals, that's manageable! I'm the same study type as you; procrastinating it and only doing it a short time beforehand. But, I'm the prime example for this bad behavior. Don't be like me and fuck up your finals. So listen up, I will boss you around one more time. You will start studying early on and really put your heart and soul into it. The relief you will feel afterwards will be the greatest thing ever! Listen to me, miss ma'am.

Omg yes Sam and Butter are sharing one brain cell! Oh Sam definitely enjoyed his ball, especially since he lost his two... The new tattoos will be smaller, fineline ones. 1 is an ufo sucking in a human with "get in loser" on top. The other one will be a devil lady (naked) waking up from a nap inside of a coffin. The best news about all of this is that THE HOT MILF WILL BE DOING THE TATTOOS!!!!

Well... technically I'm already "fired" so they can't do anything. After my apprentices is over they couldn't offer me a job so I'm being let go. And because that company is really shitty and never treated us well, I don't give a fuck anymore and will call in sick. I already called in today. Hey! Cutting a banana is hard work! I held it in my hand (first mistake) and cut through it. Then I looked away because I got distracted (second mistake) and somehow cut my thumb. The one that held the knife. I genuinely don't even know how I did that...

YES GRACE THANK YOU!! I just grabbed that poor girl while she was stealing the pigs food. She's so soft and warm and fluffy. Hennifer even looked at me and put her head on my shoulder!!

Lol I don't think her poor husband stands a chance against a bunch of obsessed ladies. We will definitely win and kindly surprise adopt Melissa. I'm sure she wouldn't even mind...

That’s honestly so true about professors. My chemistry one, the guy who gave me a zero, is a complete asshole. It’s safe to say that my evaluation of him will be a long and hefty one. Jon is honestly the goat, im sad that I’m only going to have him for one more semester. although I will be glad that I won’t have to worry about an embarrassing picture of me making it into the slides 😭 4 finals isn’t too bad, and I don’t think any of them are on the same day. At least I hope not. I’m honestly the worst when it comes to studying, but I plan to use tomorrow as a study day, so don’t worry! And to make you proud, I finished my article review paper tonight and turned it in, instead of waiting until tomorrow to do it, which is when it’s due! It was supposed to be 4 pages, but it turned out to be 6 😬

Not Sam losing his 2 other balls! I got Butters 6 tennis balls a couple months ago, and now he only has 2 left 😭 Butters has been a handful today; first he came in from playing in the backyard with a small abrasion on his head which I had to clean it, and now he’s gotten welts around his mouth and on his nose. It looks like he had an allergic reaction to something, but I’m making him sleep in my room so I can keep an eye on him. My two boy animals have caused so much trouble 😭

But your tattoo ideas are amazing!! I remember you sending in those pictures of them too, and I can’t wait for you to get them!! AND THE HOT MILF IS DOING THEM?!?! YOU BETTER BE SENDING IN THE FINISHING WORKS!!

Well since you are technically already “fired,” I guess there are no consequences for calling off work, especially if the company can’t treat the workers properly. And you know what, you absolutely deserve that time off for your traumatic experience with cutting the banana. How the hell did you manage to cut your thumb that was holding the knife??? That’s what I want to know, like how is that even possible 😭

you snatching Hennifer while she was being a menace and stealing the pigs food is honestly gold!! And she even rested her head on your shoulder, that’s so cute!! Also, I absolutely lock her name so much!! It reminds me of Yennefer from The Witcher series. We used to have chickens but we had to get rid of them because A.) they were too loud and B.) my brother got attacked by the rooster and I got in trouble for recording it 🙄

Melissa herself said that her husband doesn’t get jealous, so I’m sure we could figure something out to where we all win 🤷🏻‍♀️

[chiyoso]

In today's episode of underrated hoyoverse men, we got welt joyce. Welt's Predecessor. Someone that the hsr players should try learning about because without this dude welt yang would've been the nanami of hi3 and maybe hsr, he kinda already is-

Anyway, he was the first character I simped for in hi3. Because before I played the game my friend recommended me to read the manga + visual novels and get to know the lore first and I was looking through the visual novel I think and saw him and I just started giggling and twirling my hair.

I love both welts equally but this one captures my heart more for some reason even though he looks like any regular blue eyed dude with dark blue hair in those royalty/fantasy webtoons.

THIS IS MY DREAM BTW 😋

so, fatal warning, i may not have seen this art of the infamous original (?) bearer of the herrscher of reason, BUT ITS OKAY IM NOT ONE TO GET UPSET AT SPOILERS (also hes eye candy as fuck)

i have yet to really truly understand where the APHO timeline really resides, i just played that open world cause AI chan keep persisting me to play open world 😭 “Captain! you can-” yada yada yada like yeah yeah ill get my rewards n shit hngh

is there like, heavy deep lore regarding to him besides uhh fucking up a whole ass country ☠️☠️ he tryna speed run destroying things or what 😭

THAT AND. LOOK AT THE FUCKING OTTO APOCALYPSE BELOW THE SCREEN OMGMGNGNGGJGKTMG AND SHIT I SEE KALPAS PEEKING IN THE CORNER

I DIDNT KNOW THERE WAS AN EDIT LIKE THAT, SOME PPL ACTUALLY WANT THIS TO HAPPEN????? OMG

[notajoinerofthings]

For the song ask: 3, 10, 14 (😏), 15, 19, 29 & 30!

omg Isabel 🥺💖

3: A song that reminds you of summertime

Nils Koppruch - Kirschen (wenn der Sommer kommt). Songified Sommerleichtigkeit 💛 I've also just had a look at the comment section and it's lovely to see that people still remember Nils and his music so fondly 💞 he really was one of the good ones

10: A song that makes you sad

did you mean: my entire music library. Hmm, let's go with Thees Uhlmann - Immer wenn ich an dich denke, stirbt etwas in mir. It took a while for that song to grow on me, but now it's got a special place in my heart. Especially the lines Ich bin der Letzte mit einem Bierglas / In einer Welt voller Champagner / Die Welt ist von sich selbst besoffen / Aber ich bleib beim Bier just hit differently idk

14: A song that you would love played at your wedding

I mean.... we've already agreed that Böhmi's versions of Señorita and Malle ist nur einmal im Jahr should be played at our wedding 🤣😏 but apart from that, I'd also like to propose Thees Uhlmann - Römer am Ende Roms. It's a song about getting married that manages to reference both Bruce Springsteen and Shakespeare - what more could you possibly want from a wedding song!! And Loch Lomond for the last dance would be fun, too. (I really put way too much thought into this for someone who doesn't really care that much about marriage as a concept lmao)

15: A song that is a cover by another artist

Camp Cope - Seventeen Going Under (originally by Sam Fender) Okay, so I love Sam Fender and I love Camp Cope and the original song is a fucking masterpiece and they managed to make it their own without ruining anything. And the small changes to the lyrics and the way that Georgia absolutely slays this!! And when she sings I was far too scared to hit him / but I would hit him in a heartbeat now..... it feels quite different compared to when Sam does it but it still feels like a punch in the chest, y'know?

19: A song that makes you think about life

Gang of Youths - The Deepest Sighs, the Frankest Shadows I like that this song turns the whole... the human existence (or even the cosmos as a whole) has no objective value or meaning thinking into something that's actually life-affirming. Because it's about creating and ascribing your own meaning and finding value in your life and building relationships with others that create meaning and that allow you find value in each other. And that's definitely an idea that I can identify with. And the line I will stand in the darkness and laugh with my heel on its throat just makes me go feral for some reason haha

29: A song that you remember from your childhood

Blondie - Maria. Let's pretend that a lot of my musikalische Frühprägung didn't consist of the likes of Pur etc I was... 9? when this song came out and it was played a lot on the radio and I didn't understand a single word of the lyrics, but I loved Debbie's voice and it's just such a banger.

30: A song that reminds you of yourself

The Weakerthans - Aside 💕

music asks

[prettyboyeddiemunson]

Hey babe! Sorry you aren’t feeling well. Being sick is the worst, but maybe you’ll be lucky and only be sick for a short while. Make sure you sleep a lot, drink water, and eat healthy!

Like I said before I’m thinking of subby Eddie. Hope you like this!

You couldn’t stop yourself from cooing at the sight in front of you, “Awww, don’t you look so pretty.” Eddie kneeling was gorgeous. But even more so with his hands cuffed to the collar on his neck, big brown eyes filled with tears, and the prettiest cock ring tight around the base of his cock. His little whimpers of distress just make your core throb.

You softly run your ridding crop around his cock, taking time to go back and forth over his leaking slit. “Please ma’am! Please let me cum, my cock-“ his begging is cut off by the sharp crack of your crop against his nipple. You watch in amusement as he wiggles in pained pleasure, he just needs a moment more to calm down.

“Edward.” Immediately his attention is back to you as he moves back into position. You barely hold back a moan when you see tears sliding down his cheeks. Instead you grind the ball of your foot into his cock, enjoying his pathetic whines.

“My little slut must be fucking stupid.” Crack, a bright red mark on his thigh this time. Eddie yelps at the pain.

“How many times do I have to tell you?” Crack, a matching mark on his other thigh. Eddie can’t stop a few more tears escape from his beautiful eyes.

“Little sluts like you don’t have a cock, they have a clit.” Crack, this time you aim for his left breast. You moan and watch in hunger as Eddie starts crying.

“Awww my stupid little whore is crying. I haven’t even given you a reason to cry yet.” Eddie’s eyes widen in fear as you pull your arm back, you pause waiting to see if he needs to use his safe word. When you doesn’t your arm swings down, crack! Your crop leaves a welt across his balls.

He howls.

Eddie curls over, crying and sobbing. His noises of pain are beautiful, reaching down you rub at your clit. Fingers rapidly moving in and out of your pussy, chasing your release. You’re thrown over the edge when you noticed the growing puddle below him. Your orgasm pulls a shriek from you, head thrown back you savor the pleasure running through your body.

Eddie’s pathetic noises fill the room. You stand up, towering over the mess eddie made of himself. Leaning down you pull Eddie’s head back by his hair, “Looks like my stupid little slut can’t even do the bare minimum. You’ve pissed all over my clean floors.” With a quick jerk you shove his face into his mess, “Now be the good boy I know you can be, and clean this up.”

-🎂

thank you, lovely!! im hoping whatever it is passes soon enough 😩

AND OMG SUB!EDDIE IS SO FODKDKDKDKDKND

IM NOT REALLY INTO PISS STUFF BUT THE REST OF IT WAS FUCKING CHEFS KISS

[stxrquotes]

might be slightly ooc quotes because im not fully acquainted with every character (im in the middle of xianzhou luofu quest) or which other characters they know well yet, so theres shit like i rly want all the luofu characters to know each other well n be good friends bc theyre all so. yeah. and im too lazy to look up their relationships and also too impatient to wait until i figure it out naturally

so think of a lot of these, if they seem ooc, as an impression of how their dynamic/relationship Would look if they actually were friends/acquaintances (if theyre not in canon)

what follows under the cut are mod’s headcanons that will run rampant through the quotes🦧also here’s a link to some ships i like and stuff

be warned before clicking that i am afflicted with a the overexplains disease which causes me to be deeply incapable of brevity (im autistic)

stelle’s in-game replies are more chaotic and reckless than caelus who, while he still has plenty of silly raccoon energy, tends to be more gentle than her. dont get me wrong hes got plenty of the same potential for absolute social devastation and havoc but there are genuine differences depending on which one you picked which is very silly. so yeah stelle is a little more loudly unhinged; caelus is still plenty unhinged just a little sneakier about it. like for a second you think hes normal but then its like ah. no he was weird all along. stelle is just a lost cause i think she’s an uncontrollable toddler and i love it .im saying all this as someone who uses caelus, this is just something ive observed and heard from others

i use the korean voiceover in which march refers to welt as “welt-ajeossi” (or ahjussi tbh idk which one it is bc theyre virtually identical to a non-native) which is a term of respect for a middleaged man (like 40+) but personally i enjoy understanding it as just “old man welt” meant entirely disrespectfully, though lighthearted, because its funny as fuck, although i’ve no idea if this interpretation has any grounds bc what i understand it can be either offensive or flattering depending on the actual age of the man youre referring to. like a REALLY old guy would be like omg :3 but a young adult man would be like the FUCK did you just say to me 🦧 (this is my very rough understanding so i am deeply sorry to any and all native koreans or fluent speakers🦧please correct me on any of this) so anyways. welt is an old man and i am deeply amused by the idea that march maybe started it out as a joke like “hey. old man” but then it stopped being a joke. and now its become habit and its rly wholesome. considering he genuinely is like 80 and hes like their peepaw (thats why idk whether its intended to be silly or serious, i wish i had the cultural context pls help)

fu xuan swears so much when shes mad

yk how guinaifen did her whole sword swallowing shebang in front of yanqing n shit, i think it would be funny if jing yuan heard about it and was like ah yes. i must see this intriguing performance for myself. and so he goes to some street performances every now and then and maybe even becomes acquainted with her because idk i just think it’s delightful how they would terrorize yanqing if they were really friends

[b-rainlet]

My Rating of the upcoming 'Ein Herz für Bitches' Album by Katja Krasavice (dropping on Friday!!!)

Based on the snippet that was uploaded to Youtube <3

Frst of all: Katja uploaded a snippet video for all her albums (not counting Boss Bitch) and this one immediately took second place so I felt like making a rating for what I think about the songs now vs. what I will rate them once they're actually released on Friday.

Best Katja Snippets:

Eure Mami Snippet (watch it, I love it)

Ein Herz für Bitches Snippet (watch it for the half-naked men on leashes)

Pussy Power (sadly kinda lame in comparison)

Ein Herz für Bitches (A heart for Bitches)

Legend - 15/10 this will be a mean as fuck track and I will love it

Frauen - already released 9/10 bit too mainstream for me but super cute song, also feminism! Yay! (also this music video reminded me that i need to make gifsets of her again because she looks sooo cute in this omg)

Ein Herz für Bitches - 10/10 I am very confident that I will love this

Mia Khalifa - 11/10 She uploaded a snippet of this months ago and I've been waiting for it. It's gonna go hard.

Ich hab den schönsten Arsch der Welt - already released 11/10 remake of a song from 2003 (I have memories of watching this music video on Viva) and tbh? It's better. (But I mean, not surprising considering that Felix Jaehn is involved). If this is not playing at the club while I am wine drunk and feeling slutty, I am leaving.

Wie Gott mich schuf - 10/10 The amount of people who will be angry about this song because she is singing about looking how God made her while being heavily operated brings my bitter heart a lot of joy (also if you're religious, I do enjoy the interpretation of God approving of whatever surgery you're doing because they know what you look like in your heart and that's how they intended to make you in the first place - they simply gave you the tools to do so yourself).

Deutschland Sucht Die Super Bitch - 10/10 this is gonna be a feel good song with a nice beat

Neonlights - already released 10/10 a queer anthem! The second verse isn't as strong but the first one made me tear up so

Ohne einen Mann - 11/10 apparently based off a tiktok trend?? The melody is rippped off of Narcotic and I stan tbh

Birthday Sex - 8/10 forgettable so far

Bilderbuch - 7/10 it's featuring Jill so I have not much faith in it (Jill cannot exactly sing)

Teil Mich - 20/10 if this doesn't fuck as hard as I am expecting I will be SO disappointed

Kein Platz für uns beide - 9/10 another solid break up song

Milchshake - 8/10 classic Katja Song but not feeling it so far (it's about swallowing lmao)

Katja will upload a music video for one of the unreleased songs on Thursday, fingers crossed it's Teil Mich or Mia Khalifa.

[decembermoonskz]

Jingyuan is insanely good like 😫 everytime he speaks or just simply do sth i would giggle and shii too bad i lost my 50/50 to gepard tho it was only like 20 pulls in so i wouldn’t mind that much (gepard is also a cutie). Even though i am guaranteed now i might wanna spend it for luocha cuz long hair male character supremacy and this game be giving out too many its not good for my heart ><

HHH YIU GET IT MY FRIEND 🫠🫠🫠 jing yuan is so fucking gorgeous and when I learned how to say his name right too his name just made him so much prettier 🥺🥺🥹🥹 OMG I’m both sorry and happy for you HAKSHSKSHDJ 😂 bc I’m sad you didn’t get jing yuan but also gepard 🫠💕🫠💕🫠💕🫠💕 I love that man so so SOOO much I desire him so badly he better come home soon I’m literally ready to build him ☹️👏🏼

omfg luocha I haven’t gotten that far into the game yet to meet him but I also want him bc apparently he’s imaginary and welt jiji is the only imaginary unit rn 😩 BUT YOU ARE SO REAL FOR THAT long hair male or male-presenting characters for the world star rail really be putting jing yuan and luocha AND blade 😭😭😭😭

[boxofbonesfic]

Smut ask game! Number 7 👀👀

#7: “You want your [object] back? Make me.”  Title: Make Me Rating: Explicit Warnings: Dubcon, Spanking, Brat!Reader, Dom!Bucky Barnes, Aggressive Bucky (lmao)

A/N: GOD I LOVE THIS PROMPT LMAO. Omg as soon as i got this this EXACT scenario popped into my head and i knew it was the one 🤣 This is a work of FICTION, and it is Dark, so I assume once you’ve clicked through the link that you are comfortable with that. I do not give consent for my work to be copied, translated, or posted elsewhere, even if I am credited. This work is entirely mine, and unbeta’d, so read at your own risk! Minors, DNI! Enjoy 😘

Summary: You confront your inconsiderate new neighbor. 

THUMP!

 You sat straight up in bed, staring blearily around the room. 

 THUMP! THUMP!

 “Wha’ time’ssit?” You mumbled, rubbing at your eyes as you groped for your phone, lost among your sheets and pillows. You groaned loudly as another apartment shaking THUMP vibrated through your bedroom, and finally you felt the cool glass of your phone under your fingertips. You winced as the bright light blinded you, and you cursed, almost dropping it. 

 3:08 AM

 “What the fuck is he doing now?” You groaned. Your newest neighbor—newest pain in the ass, more like—had begun remodeling. You weren’t sure what he could be doing at three-oh-fucking-eight in the morning, but that had to be it. Another loud bang had you sitting back up in bed, and you threw the pillow angrily across the room. Before you’d realized it, you were shoving your feet into your ratty blue slippers, and marching across the creaky floor. 

 Three-oh-goddam-motherfucking-eight, you thought venomously, stalking single mindedly through your kitchen towards the front door. You’d been more than lenient when it came to your rather reclusive neighbor—when he’d moved in in the middle of the night, furniture banging up the stairwell. When he’d boxed your car in for four hours, forcing you to take a taxi to work—after leaving a polite but firm note on the windshield of his bike—you’d been understanding then, too. And it had helped to run into his cute blond friend leaving his apartment, who asked if maybe you might look in on his insular friend from time to time.

 But it was three-sweet-fucking-jesus-oh-eight in the goddamn morning, and you had to be up for work in four hours—you didn’t have it in you to be tolerant, not when—THUMP!—you’d barely gotten enough sleep as it was. You tore open the door to your apartment, glaring down the hallway hatefully. 

 THUMP!

 You clenched your fists, before taking a deep breath and knocking on the door labeled J. Barnes. You waited with baited breath for a few minutes before you knocked again, this time louder. Finally—finally—the banging stopped, and you heard an irritated sigh from the other side of the door.

 “What?” 

 You scoffed. Unbelievable. You glared at the door incredulously. He wasn’t even going to open the damn door to talk to you after making enough noise to wake up the whole block?! 

 “It’s 3:08 in the morning, would you mind not hammering on the wall?” You snapped, placing your on your hips. “Some of us have to work in the morning.” You could hear the sound of the door chain being unlatched, and you stepped back a little as the door swung open. 

 Oh my god. He leaned against the door frame, his arms crossed over his muscular chest. You swallowed audibly, forcing your eyes to stop traveling down the light dusting of hair just below his navel. Instead, they found the welted, angry skin connecting what looked to be a Stark-level prosthetic to his shoulder. You licked suddenly dry lips. You hadn’t actually seen your neighbor before, though if you’d known he was built like goddamn Hercules, you might have been more inclined to keep a civil tongue in your head. 

 “What’s the problem?” He asked, narrowing his eyes at you. You hoped like hell he hadn’t witnessed the momentary departure of all of your brain function. You cleared your throat.

 “It’s um, it’s late.” You stammered, cursing yourself. Get it together girl. “And you’re being really loud.” He held a hammer loosely in his metal hand, a testament to the construction he’d just been taking part in. You grew bolder. “Maybe try doing your remodeling during regular hours?” You suggested snippily, crossing your arms. His eyes traveled lower, and suddenly you were painfully aware that you weren’t wearing a bra. You were still in your pajamas, a tank-top and shorts that were probably too small to be decent. You quickly uncrossed your arms, not missing the lascivious smirk that spread across his handsome features. 

 “See that’s the problem doll,” He said, clearly enjoying the way you fumed at the pet-name. “I work during ‘regular people hours’.” He ran a hand through his hair, and you tried not to lick your lips as his muscles bunched and flexed under his skin. “So you can kind of see my problem.” 

 “You’re not the only person in the building,” You snapped. “Other people live here too.” 

 “And you’re the only one complaining.” He replied easily, and you fought the urge to stomp your foot. It was the lack of sleep making you tired and irritable, you already knew this, but his flippant attitude certainly wasn’t helping. You wanted to scream, but you held it in—barely. 

 “Look. It’s 3:08 in the morning, and—”

 “3:15, actually.” 

  “—AND you’re making it impossible for me to sleep. My bedroom is right behind…whatever the hell you’re doing in here.” You continued, ignoring his snide interruption. 

 “Poor thing,” He grinned wolfishly at you, his eyes tracing the outline of your breasts hungrily through your shirt. “I’d hate to keep you out of bed.” Your face heated, and you sputtered at him. 

 “J-just keep it down, okay?” Your voice came out shrill and squeaky, and you winced, turning on your heel. “Some of us are trying to sleep!” You started back down the hallway towards your own apartment, feeling his eyes on your back the whole way. 

 You slammed your door harder than necessary, and made your way back to your bedroom, your heart pounding a little harder in your chest when you realized that only about three feet of wall separated you from your hot—irritating—neighbor. You laid back down in bed, pressing your face into the pillows. 

 THUMP!

 “Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me.” 

 You threw yourself back out of bed, forgoing even your slippers this time as you marched back down the hall. You banged on his door again, all semblance of patience gone. He opened it, smirking down at you. 

 “Yes?” He had the hammer in his hand again, held loosely against his hip. You said nothing as your hand snaked forward, snatching it from his fingers. He was surprised and you used it to your advantage, speeding back down the hall and locking your door as he stared at you, open mouthed. 

 “Poor thing,” You said mockingly, tossing the hammer onto your counter. He could have it back when he could be responsible with it, goddammit. Until then, you would be keeping it in your custody until Mr. J. Barnes could prove that he wasn’t a threat to your nightly rest. You heard him shuffling down the hallway to knock on your door rather forcefully—but you ignored him. He knocked another time, before you heard him curse loudly on the other side of the door. 

 “Open up, doll.”

 You yawned loudly. “I don’t think I will. I’m actually about to head to bed, so…” You drawled, smirking triumphantly at him through the peep-hole. “Maybe you should too.” 

 “Very funny. Now open up and give me my tools back, doll.” 

 “Goodnight, Mr. Barnes.” A heavy thump shook your apartment, and you yelped with surprise—he’d pounded his fist heavily against it. 

 “This is all very funny,” He growled lowly, in a voice that told you he didn’t actually think it was funny at all. “But I’m serious now. I want my shit.” You scowled. He was the one who’d woken you at the asscrack of dawn with his very un-neighborly racket, and promptly refused to quiet down. You weren’t just standing up for yourself, no—you were making a stand for the twelve other tenants in the building too. 

 “You want me to give your hammer back?” You hissed through the wood. “Make me.”  

The sound of splintering wood was ringing in your ears as his metal fist came easily through the thick wood of your front door, wrapping around the handle as he unlocked it. The door swung open, hitting the wall with a loud bang as you gaped at him. “Y-you can’t—!” His nostrils flared as he looked at you, sprawled on the floor in front of your—now useless—door. 

 He grabbed your wrist, tugging you to your feet. “Gettin’ real tired of you telling me what I can and can’t do, sweetheart.” He growled, crushing his lips to yours. You gasped in surprise, and he drank the sound greedily, groaning against you. “Fuckin tease—s’this what passes for clothes now?” His hands found your ass, gripping it tightly through the paper thin fabric of your little shorts. You squirmed against him, moaning low in your throat. He delivered a stinging slap to your ass, groaning when you yelped against his lips. 

 “Shhh,” He said softly, massaging the sore spot he’d just left with cool, metal fingers. He kicked the door shut behind him, walking you further into the apartment. “You’re a real fuckin’ brat, aren’t you doll?” He asked cupping your chin with firm, gentle fingers. You shook your head defiantly. You weren’t sure how this had gone from a disagreement with your neighbor about his after-hours noise level to him punching a hole in your door and then marching inside to deliver the hottest kiss of your life, but here you were. You could feel embarrassing slick gathering between your thighs, and did your best to ignore it. 

 “N-no! And you need to leave,” You said hotly. “Before I call—” Another sharp slap made you cry out, jerking in his arms. “Ow!” 

 “Bratty little girls don’t make the rules,” His voice was a low rumble in your ear. “I do.”  You sucked a sharp breath into your lungs as he walked you backwards toward your kitchen table. You hated him ordering you around—and more than that, you hated how wet the calm, firm delivery of each command was making you. 

 “You’re the one breaking into people’s apartments,” You snapped, struggling in his grip, the warm metal whirring as you flailed. This was crazy—you were crazy. You should have been screaming down the building; calling the building manager, calling the cops—but you didn’t. His blue eyes were locked on your face, and you were almost afraid to meet them. 

 “Only because you stole from me.” He pulled out a chair with his free hand, seating himself. The world flipped on its head as he grabbed you, turning you face down over his lap. Your belly hit his thighs and the wind rushed out of your lungs, leaving you in stunned silence. He clucked his tongue at you as his hands began unabashedly moving over the exposed cheeks of your ass. Your shorts were barely managing to help you retain even an inch of your modesty, and you shivered as cool air moved over the damp spot of cloth covering your pussy. He groped you unabashedly, massaging the cheeks of your ass with slow, satisfied movements, as though he had all the time in the world. 

 “I didn’t steal from you—” You protested, but your complaint was cut off with another resounding slap that you heard before you felt it. “Ow—stop that!” You whined, kicking your legs uselessly as you tried to wriggle off of his lap. 

 “You want another one for lying, sweetness?” He asked, his voice low and gravelly. 

 “I’m not—” SMACK. “Fuck! Stop it!”

 He soothed the sting with cool, gentle circles of his metal hand. He ran his fingers through your hair affectionately, wrapping a curl tightly around his thumb before releasing it. 

 “Now doll. You’re never gonna learn manners if I don’t punish you when you break the rules.” He spanked you again, and the pained cry that tore from your lips ended in a strangled moan. Your face heated, and you pressed it against the leg of his joggers to hide it. You could practically hear the grin dripping from his words. “Oh baby, I think you liked that one.” He chuckled, his fingers dipping between the throbbing cheeks of your ass. 

 “I don’t need my loud neighbor to teach me manners—hey, no, stop—!!” Your protests came too late, and his cool fingers slid wetly against the swollen lips of your cunt. You were glad that in this position, you couldn’t see the smug, knowing expression you were sure graced his handsome features. 

 “No?” He asked mockingly, dragging his fingers up and down your slit to collect as much of your wetness as he could. “Could have fooled me.” Your cheeks burned with humiliation, even as your pussy clenched hungrily. He slid one, thick finger into your wet heat, groaning softly. “Fucking tight, too,” He cursed. “Gonna stretch you open on my cock, brat.” He curled his finger inside you, slapping your ass again lightly with his other hand. “Nothin’ to say, huh? Figured you’d shut that smart fuckin’ mouth when I got my hands on you.” 

 You wanted to tell him to fuck off, that he had no fucking idea what he was talking about—but currently your mouth was busy hanging open, your eyes squeezed shut as he alternated between slipping his fingers into your eager pussy, and laying quick, stinging blows on the soft flesh of your ass. You could feel his hard cock pushing into your belly through his pants, throbbing hotly against you as you squirmed. His calloused thumb circled your clit and you whined, pushing your hips back into his hand. He flicked it and you jerked, burying your teeth in his calf. He hissed, gripping your ass hard with his free hand. 

 “Fuck.” He hissed under his breath as his cock pulsed against your belly. You grinned, but your pleasure was short lived as he delivered a series of harsh spanks, forcing you to cry out. You pushed at his legs, hitting at them uselessly as he held you still, his fingers still damp with you. 

 “Looks like nobody ever gave you a proper spanking, sweetheart,” He growled. “But I’ll fix that.” You howled with pain, uncaring if any of the neighbors heard you. When you were sobbing softly against his leg, your pussy soaked and twitching, he righted you, spreading your legs across his lap. “You ready to be good for me, doll?” He asked, tilting your chin up for another kiss. You nodded breathlessly. He reached for the waistband of your shorts, the now warm metal humming against your skin as he tore them easily. He bit his lip at the sight of you, scrubbing a hand down his stubbled chin. “Fuck.” 

 He didn’t bother taking off his joggers, just sliding them down far enough for the fat head of his cock to spring out, slapping against his stomach. You clenched, suddenly aware of how achingly empty you were. “You want this dick, sweetness?” He asked, tugging your top down to expose your breasts. You nodded eagerly, your eyes flicking up to his and then back down. You reached for him, your hand wrapping around the base and working up to the tip. He grinned. “Then you better ask real nice.” 

 You swallowed thickly. “I want you to fuck me.” 

 “Not good enough doll. Try again.” You pouted at him. He slid the head of his cock against you, and you hissed, sucking in a sharp breath. 

 “Can you please fuck me, Mr. Barnes.” 

 “Mmm, I like that. Say it again.”

 “Please fuck me, Mr. Barnes,” You moaned as he pushed the head of his cock against you, popping it just inside. He cursed, throwing his head back as his eyes slid shut. 

 “God fucking damn.” He fucked up into you, expletives falling continuously from his lips as he helped you ride him. “So good,” He grunted, his fingers tightening hard on your hips. “Should’a done this weeks ago.” You felt so full, and his hands were everywhere. Ghosting over your back, tweaking your nipples and slapping your already sore ass. You already felt heat building in your belly, tension forcing you to move your hips faster, angle him deeper—and he grabbed your hips, pulling your down hard against him. He swore, pulling you off of him. 

 You only had time to moan once in complaint before he bent you over the table, kicking your legs apart as he fisted his cock with his other hand, lining himself quickly back up with the tight hole he’d just been occupying. 

 “Shi-it,” He groaned as he slid in slowly, not stopping until his hips were pressed tightly against the curve of your ass. He fucked you hard, hard enough to shake the little vase of flowers from your table and send it crashing to the floor. Your eyes rolled in your head as your pussy clenched hard around him. So close—

 “You gonna cum, baby?” He asked, his hand sliding up your spine to cup the back of your neck, pressing you harder into the table. 

 “Oh fuck,” You mewled, nodding. “Yes, yes, yes—” You clamped down around him like a vice, fresh wetness coating his cock and the table beneath you as you came harder than you could ever fucking remember—right on your kitchen table. His cock was twitching, his hips still moving against you as you felt answering sticky heat coat your insides. He pressed his forehead to your shoulder, his lips moving silently against your skin in what you could only assume were either praises or curses.

 He pulled out of you reluctantly, and it took every ounce of your strength to turn around and look at him, your head still fuzzy. He sat heavily back down in the chair, dragging a hand across his sweaty forehead. 

 “So…” You asked, trying and failing to stand straight on your still shaking legs. “What’s, um… your name?” You asked, and he laughed. 

 “Bucky.” 

 “I hope you’re good with that stupid hammer, Bucky,” You panted. “Because you’re gonna fix my door.” 

Fin.