#i found it funny as hell ngl

[h0]

dearest @turn200 tagged me to make a moodboard by searching your name + core on pinterest and girlies.... i had to SCRAP to find something worthy! guidocore comes out with only jersery shore memes!! im gonna kms! so amongst the dozens of snooki and pauly d memes i was able to find: an outstanding number of pictures of bees? and anime/omori memes? and, understandly in true guidocore fashion, pictures of muscled up men in tank tops wow i guess pinterest DOES know me! alksdlkjksdf

i tag @cacaos and @straponstrapoff <3

[echosong971]

i wish every sniper on the roof in this game a very [metal pipe sound]

[ab-arts]

So

The Minecraft Movie trailer

Don't know how they managed to fuck up the concept of a Minecraft movie in every way possible but they sure did

[percephilous]

Local (maybe) teenager brings the weird dog it found outside into the lab after refusing to pick a starter, blows up professor (rip Jenner)

Isn't abbadons dog just wonderful. Isn't she. She is. Say it. She's wonderful. (distant dragon pulse power up)

I've never drawn dieno if you can't tell. Or. Amanda.

[m00nj3w3l]

Nothing will be as funny to me as my friend (who knows nothing of BSD yet) just sharing a message from an anime Telegram group about Poe's birthday and then going "why the fuck does Edgar Allan Poe have a racoon"

[shidoukanae]

Lineart to lineless art progress thingie (for funsies! and also bc im running out of things atm to put in queue lol). My fashion sense is very basic but i really like the left & right designs for Helene!

It's interesting to see how many details get lost/added in the process between lining things out/turning the lines to full color. Helene's face on the left loses the angle I was going for (OTL) and i fiddled with the anatomy a bit to make it better on the right

Wanted to make this as a glimpse at what a modern AU!version of Helene would look like (and im really hoping to see her on Earth and her reactions to being on Earth! but atm it's hinted only dragons are capable of tracking down people across 'verses so im just saying...hey Paris...regarding Helene and your Dragon Pact powers...).

[zinepunk]

Some thoughts on the end of arcane season 2:

Wow that was even gayer than expected /pos

Episode 7 was damn incredible. Everything I ever wanted from this show, especially with the “what could have been” themes

I know I wasn’t supposed to find it funny but I cracked tf up every time the alternate realities switched. Like it’d go from Ekko on a date in ideal Zaun being like “nooo I HATE parties :(“ to Jayce GOING THROUGH IT eating raw meat alone in a cave lmaoooo

TimeBomb canon letsgoooooo

GAY SEX???? GAYY??? SEX?!?!?!?

IN A JAIL CELL FOR SOME REASON???? I mean slay ig??

Side note I had a dream that Vi and Caitlyn had sex but woke up and was like damn too bad they’ll never do that in canon. I’m a prophet 😎

Mel’s character design somehow got even better and I love that for her (rip about the mommy issues tho)

Also what was up with Skye being savage as hell? Viktor being like “I’ll miss our talks” and her being like “no you won’t” Tf???!?

Ekko slayed this season but what’s new

Ekko putting Jinx on a suicide watch by rewinding time every time she killed herself was funny as hell ngl. Speaking as someone who’s been monitored 24/7 for that exact reason

I wanna know what the hell Ekko said to Jinx to convince her to not only not die but also save everyone cuz I feel like we missed some steps

Look I know JayVik didn’t become OFFICIALLY canon like the others but that confession was gay as hell. They’re canon to me idc

The reveal that the mage who saved Jayce as a kid was Viktor all along?? Side note, my dad actually predicted that by accident because he couldn’t remember who was who so yay dad

I know this isn’t important whatsoever but VIKTOR WITH A BEARD CAN GET IT

Jinx’s new hair is really growing on me but unfortunately it only lasted like 30 mins

I can’t believe jinx fucking died. I seriously didn’t think they’d kill off one of the main characters

Also did Jayce and Viktor die? That was super unclear like where did they go??

I feel like Vi and Sevika really got the short end of the stick with this ending since both of them had at least two found families EACH die off completely

Anyway in summary I LOVED the ending and the little seeds it planted for future spin offs. Once again I watched the whole thing jaw dropped. I kept thinking “wouldn’t it be crazy if they did xyz? But they wouldn’t do thaaaat” and then they FUCKING DID IT. 10/10 show, ended as beautifully as I’d hoped.

[princessbunnib]

Tactical Princess

König |Cod/Mw2|

Summary: One thing leads to another and you find yourself sandwiched inbetween your boyfriend and your new boy toy.

Pairing: König & Simon 'GHOST' Riley X Fem!Reader

Warnings: 18+ Smut MDNI, Dom König & Simon, Sub To Brat To Sub Reader, Heavy Degrading, Minimal Praising, Simon Being Heavily British, Google Translated German Speach From König, Face Slapping, Thigh Slapping, Ass Slapping, Tossing/Pushing Reader Around, Vaginal Sex, Choking, Sadistic König, Multiple CreamPies, Size Difference, Size Kink, Consensual, MM4F, Fingering, Squirting, Oral |M| Receiving, Facial, Come In Mouth, Manhandling, Established Relationship, Vaginal CreamPie, Double Penetration, Penetration Encouragement, Sex In Livingroom, Sex On Couch, Sex In Bedroom, Sex Standing Up, Spooning Sex Position, Cuddling Ending, Poly Ending?.

Author's Note: Chuga Chuga Chuga Chuga Chuga Chuga- CHOO CHOOO!

OMG I snapped on this ngl. PT2?

I now have 300 followers. I love all of you Bunni's so muchhhhh.😭💕

Gifs: @bld-hnd

Part Two:

____

König had company over while you laid in bed upstairs buried in blankets enjoying your day off. The lights were off with only the TV shining through the room.

You heard faint laughing and talking coming from the livingroom making you turn the TV volume up in annoyance. It's been like three hours already. Almost going into four o'clock. And what the hell was so funny that called for them to be so loud. There's no way the guys are still here. Knowing König, his social battery should be drained by now.

You then felt your stomach rumbling, telling your brain that you were hungry. You pulled yourself out of bed and fixed your shorts, looking around the room for your shirt to put it back on since you found laying in bed half naked very comfortable.

Once you found your shirt you tossed it back on but glanced at your chest to see your nipples were hard. It's cold in the house, König doesn't like being hot. He says it makes him irritable. He also can't get himself to sit still for a long time to prevent himself from getting hit quicker. So because of that, you're cold literally all the time.

You rolled your eyes not thinking too much about it and walked downstairs. This will be quick. You can sneak into the kitchen, grab a snack, and be back upstairs watching your favorite show. Easy.

König was on the couch sitting next to someone. He glanced over his shoulder and at you, his eyes lighting up like a puppy seeing their owner after a long day of being home alone.

"Hey! Y/n, can you come here for a second?" He asked with a hidden smirk. You shrugged and walked over to him, standing next to him and glancing at the person he sat with.

There was tension in the room for some reason. You couldn't tell what type though. Your arms were crossed so you could hide the fact that your nipples were hard. König always makes it his buisness to point that out to you, thus embaressing you because he thinks it's funny.

"Ghost? What are you doing here? And are you two out of all people having a conversation? I could have sworn it was more people here." You asked as König held your hand trying to pull you closer to him.

He's so touchy right now. Why is that? Usually he refrains from physical contact when other people are around.

"There was, Alejandro and Soap had to get going..." Ghost simply explained. You could feel his eyes tracing every part of your body. You were so sexy. He smirked behind the mask clearly taking interest in what he saw.

König pulled you by the hips while you were staring at Ghost, focusing on how attractive his accent and voice was. You came back to reality once Konig sat you down in the middle of them. The two men staring down at you like a piece of meat.

They were both so big together. You felt so small compared to them. Fuck, keep it together. Don't ruin this with your lewd thoughts.

You tried to not look at Ghost but couldn't resist the urge. Your eyes would meet with his which made him place his strong hand on your inner thigh.

"Turns out König and I have a mutual interest in something, isn't that right?" He asked glancing at your boyfriend who was grabbing your hand to hold it and bring it up to his face, placing small kisses on it.

"Yeah... do you want to know what it is Y/n?" König responded before looking down at your breasts. You tried covering yourself with your free right arm but Ghost grabbed you before you could. The two men stared at your chest seeing how hard your nipples were.

They then began to kiss both sides of your neck in unison, their hands lifting to slide under your shirt. Konig squeezing your right breast and Ghost squeezing your left.

You were freaking out on the inside but decided to keep your cool and go along with this. "What is it?" You asked glancing at them both.

"König told me that you wanted a threesome... that's why he invited me over today with the others..."

Ghost spoke in a cocky tone in your ear. Making shivers throughout your spine. You bit down on your lip and took your arms from them. This was all too much for you to handle at once. You knew you had to step away. You were too nervous around them. König was acting so different.

You tried to get up, but they pulled you by your wrists and brought you back down to sit inbetween them. "We'll do anything to fuck you Y/n... this is something you've wanted, so why not let it happen?" König questioned while bitting into your neck.

"But König... you're my boyfriend- I don't want you to think less of me or-"

He chuckled at your doubts and held your face. Dragging his thumb on your lip to keep the tension going. "Don't worry... there's nothing you could do to make me not love you... if you want to fuck someone else that's fine... but-" He then put his hand around your throat and squeezed tightly. "Don't think you'll be able to get what you want so easily... you're mine, remember that."

Ghost chuckled and turned your face so you could look at him. "Yeah... but tonight you're going to have to share aren't you? So in that case, she's ours." He stated just to mess with König a little.

You really loved the sound of that. 'Ours.' You would like that, a little too much than you'd like to admit. König felt a little jealous, watching you stare intently at Ghost rather than at him. Ghost's hand kept feeling up your thighs. You enjoyed being touched by him. How dare you.

Your breath hitched once König pulled you onto his lap. Being more possesive over you to have your attention. You broke eye contact with Ghost and looked at him.

You could feel König's bulge under you, so what other idea would you have that wasnt to grind your hips back and forth to further turn yourself on. König chuckled and slid his hands under your shorts. To his surprise you werent wearing any underwear.

He felt so good under you. The thought of his cock stretching you out felt like heaven itself. With your eyes glued on him while you grinded on his lap, Ghost took the opportunity to stand behind you and pull your hair, forcing your eyes on him.

"Don't forget about me now... seems like König's getting a bit jealous..." He smirked holding your face with both hands.

You bit down on your lip and stopped moving your hips. The eye contact Ghost had with you was intoxicating. His eyes were dark and sad. You could fall in love with him right then and there. His eyes are so pretty.

König then held you onto his lap and began to move his hips forward. You felt him pressing on your clothed clit, making you break eye contact with Ghost.

"You want to make this a competition? Fine by me... I already know what it takes to make her come. I clearly have the upper hand here." He said while glaring at Ghost.

"Let's see who's name she'll be moaning more loudly then..." He responded before staring down at you.

Ghost moved out of the way allowing König to forcfully pull you off the couch like you were some doll to a toddler. He kept you still as the two of them got closer to you, they both towered over you. Making you like this situation perhaps a bit more than they did.

"Don't just stand there, take your shirt off... we want to see you." König demanded pushing you into Ghost's direction.

He held your hips, groaning into your ear. You then slowly took off your shirt. Tossing it somewhere in the room and attempting to cover yourself out of embaressment.

"Oh look, she wants to pretend like she's embarrassed... how cute." He teasingly spike and pulled your arms down, keeping them at your sides.

"Ghost, what do you think of her? She's cute isn't she?" König questioned. Blaintently ignoring your attempts to get his hands off of you. "Well- of course, she is quite the looker... but I'm not really fully sold on the idea, she seems to have an issue with listening." Ghost shrugged slapping your ass watching you jump in pain, your exposed chest bouncing up.

"Yeah- she can be a bit stubborn... she likes to act as if she doesn't enjoy this but I know she does..." He said before squeezing your breast and pinching your nipples.

"Ah~ K-König..." You whimpered.

"Take her shorts off..." König said. You looked down at Ghost as he crouched down to pull at your spandex shorts. You closed your legs together feeling your body drop in temperature. It's so damn cold in here.

König sat back down with you in his arms, Ghost sat down on the opposite side of you. They both moved their hips forward to manspread, bringing attention to their equally big bulges.

"Go fix the temperature since you want to act like it's so cold... we'll wait." He shrugged letting you go and pushing you along.

He slapped your ass and watched you wince in pain, when you walked by Ghost he to slapped your ass getting the same reaction from you.

They both watched you as you walked over to the thermostat to turn it higher. You turned around still standing there, holding yourself.

You were so nervous. Their eyes didn't leave you not once. You felt like prey to a pack of lions. They both pated their laps. Encouraging you to come back over to them.

"Alright now I'm completely sold... I'm a bit upset that you kept her a secret for so long, she's fucking gorgeous." Ghost said begining to palm himself through his jeans. The thick material made it impossible for him to touch anything, he unbuckled his belt. Catching your attention.

You looked at him and began to walk over to him. König snapped his fingers for you to look at him.

"Nope, not yet. I said I wasn't going to make this easy for you. You're getting too greedy." He said shooing you far from them.

You whimpered and still kept your eyes on what Ghost was hiding in his pants. You heard König pull his erecton out but you already knew how he looked and felt.

Ghost and Konig were definitely around the same size. I mean how could they not? They're both over six feet tall. Although König's was longer by atleast two inches which gave him the advantage of penetrating you deeper.

On the other hand, having to take Ghost in would be a challenge for sure. He's way thicker, and the veins scattered about his shaft were something you looked forward to. He was cut while König wasn't. Both had an equal amount of pubic hair, but Ghost's bush was less groomed.

"Look at her... she's imagining our cocks inside of her isn't she, such a fucking slag she is..." Ghost said, bringing you out of your inner thoughts just by the tone of his voice alone.

You looked at them and felt your face rising in temperature. God why won't one of them tell you what to do already? You were loosing it.

"Come here... don't fucking touch us though, just sit there and wait for further instruction." He demanded curling his fingers in your direction.

You stepped forward only for Ghost to snap his fingers and click his tongue. "On your knees and crawl to us... you won't be needing to walk for a while." He said.

That's more like it. You tried to hide your smile as you got down on your knees. You then kneeled on all fours and crawled over to them like he asked. Once you approached the couch, you sat inbewteen them.

"Spread your legs you fucking whore." König said while pinning your upper body to the couch. You spread your legs watching Ghost bring his attention to your exposed lower half.

"Wow, such a cute little clit you have there... I can just tell how wet she is by looking at her..." He said before slapping your clit and rubbing it.

You bucked your hips with a moan. You lifted your hands to touch him but König grabbed your wrists before you could even reach Ghost.

"Ich bin es langsam leid, dich dazu zu bringen, die Regeln zu befolgen...“ He aggressively spoke to you in his native tongue while slapping your face to make you whimper.

("I'm getting really tired of making you follow the rules...")

"I'm sorry~ I'm just a needy slut..." You said with a innocent tone.

"Shut the fuck up... you don't get to talk to me or him from this point forward..." He said slapping your face again. You pouted and began to move in place. You stopped once Ghost slapped your thighs.

You looked down at him watching him lift your hips up and rub your clit faster. You moaned clenching your walls around nothing.

Ghost chuckled and swiped his thumb upwards through your lips to apply pressure to your clit after teasing you for so long. You squirmed letting out a moan feeling Ghost's fingers slide inside you, deep until reaching his knuckles. He curled his fingers inside you and watched your body jolt as you melted into his touch.

"She's so wet... just hear that... what a fucking whore..."

Your hips bucked again making Ghost slap your thighs once more. "She doesn't fucking listen... clearly she doesn't deserve to have her cunt played with..." He sighed shaking his head and took his hands away from you.

You whimpered looking at him then at König. He wasn't looking at you. If anything he was ignoring you, they both were.

"The only we can do to whip her back into shape is if we use her... get her so worked up that she's on her knees begging like a fucking slut to fuck our cocks... her whoreish face covered in come." König stated before yanking you off of Ghost and pushing you to the floor.

"Wait... I'll be good... I'm sorry... König please." You whimpered hoping he'd take pitty on you.

The pair rolled their eyes at you and stood up. König grabbed you by your hair and threw you onto the couch again. Ghost grabbing your ankles and tossing you over onto your back.

You spread your legs again slightly proud that it was that easy. You looked at them, König still on your left side and Ghost on your right.

They both collected your juices on their fingers and rubbed your pussy. Ghost rubbing your clit and König rubbing your entrance. You closed your eyes and sighed heavily in pleasure. Trying to figure out which hand to focus on.

Ghost used his middle and ring fingers to rub the bundle of nerves and apply pressure. König slid his index and middle fingers inside you to curl them inside you. You moaned clenching around him and started to play with your breasts.

Your eyes were still closed until you heard deep groans and moans. Once your eyes opened you could feel your pupils dilating, along with dopamine releasing in your brain.

The two of them were stroking themselves while staring at you, their fingers hard at work to give you something to moan about. Your mouth opened in shock. Fuck. This was something you didn't know you needed. You didn't know which one to look at.

König? His cock head turning a bright red while all the blood rushed to his tip. A pretty stream of pre-cum dripping onto the floor while his pretty foreskin covered half of his tip when he'd ride his hand upwards, then fully open when he'd slide his hand back down.

And Ghost? Shit. He thrusted his hips into his hand as he stared into your eyes. You could tell that he was imagining fucking you right before your eyes. He groaned deeply and smirked as you kept eye contact with him. His fingers slowing down so he could slap your clit, then picking up speed again to make you moan louder.

He'd stop moving his hips and begin to make his hand do all the work, rubbing his tip into his warm palm and squeeze himself to apply pressure. Sending a tingling feeling in his balls, releasing his hand before feeling a sharp pain.

You whimpered feeling König's fingers penetrate you deeper to get your attention back onto him. You looked at him and clenched tightly for longer than usual, he smirked at you whole stroking himself faster and thrusting his fingers in at the same pace as his hand to make it seem like he was inside you.

When he'd curl his fingers upwards, he'd start stroking himself upwards. He'd pull his fingers out of you and stop stroking himself. Staring down at his cock to watch it twitch and jump on it's own.

He breathily moaned and took himself in his hand again, sliding in a finger and pushing upwards deeply to find the spot behind your urethra.

You whimpered throwing your head back letting yourself come undone and moan louder. They watched your legs shake and lock in place before you stretched them out again. König nodded to you and hummed 'Mhm' to tell you that he knew how good you were feeling.

You whined and bent your legs at the knees again and pulled on the couch cushion. Your body felt hot all over. Ghost slapped your clit again and rubbed more consistently, collecting your juices on his fingers before doing so.

"Ahhh~ ahhh- ohhhh~ Ggh-K-k-ko-gh..."

You were sexualy and mentally confused. Who's name do you moan? You couldn't think straight. Your body enjoyed the feeling of their hands, your mind enjoyed the sight of two men getting off to the sight of you.

You held your breath for a second stopping all sounds from coming out. Their groans and wet noises that came from your vagina was all that could be heard. Your back arched as you finaly let yourself breath again. You whimpered loudly while your legs started to shake again. Their fingers continuing what they were doing but in a faster pace.

König moaned and slapped your entrance before sliding his middle finger inside you and curling it again. His middle finger was his longest one, you moaned covering your face and let your vaginal muscles relax around him. He hummed once more, encouraging you to release however you wanted to.

"Yes yes yes yeeess~ Kghhoöstnniigg~" You moaned at the top of your lungs allowing yourself to squirt. You didn't have a clear name in mind to moan so you put both of theirs together. They groaned and slapped your clit and entrance at the same time. You whimpered biting onto your knuckle and bucked your hips onto ther hands.

They stoped touching themselves and payed attention to you. König grabbing your face and keeping your eyes on them. Ghost forcing your jaw open to slide his thumb inside to get you to suck it.

"Yeah... make a fucking mess you pathetic little bitch... now our fucking couch needs to be cleaned because of you..."

"You're such a whore... moaning at the top of your lungs like that while getting off to our hands..."

"Hmmpmmm!" You tried speaking but forgot that Ghost's thumb was in your mouth.

Once your legs stopped shaking they took their hands away from you and sat down on opposite sides of the couch. You were breathing heavily trying to gain composure until they groaned loudly, pushing you off of the couch again and grabbing your hair for your face to be in their laps.

"Alright- fuck... you've had your fun. Now get to sucking." König demanded of you while putting his cock in your face. You looked down at it, seeing pre-cum still dripping from it. You held the base of him gently and was about to put him in your mouth until Ghost pulled your hair aswel for you to give him attention first.

____

König and Ghost sat on the couch with you on your knees in front of them. They looked down at you with their hips pushed forward and sitting in a manspreading form. You could see their equally heafty erections just fighting to be seen in your eyes first.

You licked your bottom lip not knowing what your next move should be.

You wanted them to defile you in any way possible. These two large men throwing you to eachother to allow the other man have a go at you. Their equally fat cocks stuffing, fucking and pumping deep inside your tight holes. Stretching you out and practically making you a new one.

You couldn't resist the desire to be their cock sleeve tonight. Their eyes stared down at you, you could see the animalistic gleam in them. Right now they weren't seeing you as anything but a new toy. You wanted to be used and abused. Your holes aching for more of their come.

König then snapped his fingers to get your attention. You looked at him then at Ghost. He snaped his fingers again. Demanding that you'd stare at him and only him.

"She doesn't know which one to look at first... guess she doesn't feel like using that brain of hers... clearly she should be looking at me..." He stated as you crawled towards him. Seating yourself inbetween his legs.

"She's so pretty down there... but I hope she's not forgetting that she has another cock to drain..."

You looked at Ghost while rubbing König through his sweats with your left hand. Your right hand doing the same for him. He let a groan slip out caressing your face, finally acknowledging you but not completely.

"It's cute that she's trying to be a tease but I personally think she should get on with it." Ghost said nonchalantly while ignoring you.

"Yeah right? These cocks aren't going to drain themselves... I kindof feel like my time is wasted, what about you?" König said.

"Affirmative..."

Well. They're right, you don't want to disappoint after all. You swallowed the lump in your throat and finally held their cocks in your hands. You hummed in pleasure looking up at them and started off with König, you were clearly more familiar with him.

You stuck your tongue out and took his tip in your mouth, using your hand on Ghost. The two men groaned in unison while throwing their heads back. You moaned to get yourself to be confident enough to give them your best preformence.

Ghost could tell you were taking your sweet time to not suck him off next. He then grabbed your head and turned you in his direction, slapping his tip on your lips then proceeding to pry them open.

"There's no space to be scared now... you agreed to this so fucking deliver." He demanded while placing both of his hands on the back of your head.

"But you're really thi- mghhhmmm!"

You panicked feeling him force himself into your throat. Your eyes began to water and push tears out onto your cheeks. You looked up at him, trying to push his hands away but couldn't.

"Look at her acting like she can't take it... she likes it rough... the more tears the better..." König explained while grabbing your left hand and wrapping it around his cock, now using it like a fleshlight. Holding his hands around it to keep your hold tight.

"Fuck... how dose she feel?" He moaned.

"Aghh... absolutely perfect... a bit teethy though... but nothing a bit of breaking in can't fix." Ghost responded while moving your head up and down like you were bobbing for apples at a fair.

"Hmm! Mhfggh!"

You needed air but they couldn't hear you. Ghost moved your head faster and groaned holding you down forcing himself to touch your uvula. Shaking your head to make you gag. He enjoyed the sounds of you trying to speak or atleast catch your breath.

"Mhmm... fuck... take that fucking cock... you pathetic little slag."

He pushed his cock into your cheek getting off from the slippery texture on the inside of your mouth. You were able to breath slightly as you looked up at him batting your eyelashes and placing your hands on the floor for support.

"You've had enough- don't enjoy it too much... now suck mine, you fucking bitch." König groaned at the loss of contact and pulled your hair for you to look up at him.

You smiled and stuck your tongue out. Gladly taking half of his long shaft in and lapping your tongue up on the underside of his tip. You let him go with a pop and giggled before putting on an airheaded smile. Then proceeding to make sloppy wet kisses for your right side of his shaft and breathed on it to make it stand taller.

Ghost grunted caressing your face and stoking himself while staring at you. You looked up at both of them with your eyes big. Tapping König's tip on your tongue and sucking it briefly while collecting more saliva.

"Fuck... she sucks cock like it's a sport... don't just play with it now, suck it like it's your job..." Ghost said forcing your head down deeper. You moaned while opening your throat so König's cock could reach deeper inside.

"Haaafgghmmmuaahh~♡"

You lifted your head up to breath for a second while König stared down at you. You bit your lip and licked the acces saliva that fell. "You guys are so big..." You seductively spoke while taking Ghost's base in your left hand. You brought their tips together on your lips and kissed them both, then pumped your hands together and slid your tongue in the middle of them.

"Christ... she sucks cock like a porn star... take us both in your mouth now..." Ghost demanded forcing your head down slightly.

You tilted your head to the side and sucked them off in a circular motion. Your head moving on it's own as you closed your eyes to focus more. König held your head and thrusted himself into your mouth, tears forming in your eyes as Ghost began to do the same thing.

"Schwanzhungrige Schlampe... du arbeitest für unsere Lasten, nicht wahr?"

("Cock hungry bitch... you're working for our loads aren't you?")

"Mhm~♡ Am I doing good... am I good girl?" You asked with a small whimper as you stoked them off so you could speak.

"Hah~ she wants praise for doing the bare minimum... I dunno if she deserves it..." Ghost slightly moaned while yanking your hair.

"Please... I want to know if I've been good..." You said while pouting your lip and sucking their tips again before showering their cocks in kisses.

They stood up and yanked your arm for you to sit in front of them. They stared down at you with their cocks in hand.

"Shut the fuck up... keep sucking..." Ghost groaned and held your throat tapping his tip on your tongue. König the back of your head while he held your jaw. They both slapped your face with their cocks to encourage you to open your mouth again.

You opened wide while wrapping your hands around them and rested their tips on your slippery tongue, pumping up and down and looking at them.

"Ahhh~ heyoghhh hgo hiignh~♡"

("Ahh~ they're so big~♡")

"Yeah? Of course they are... wow she can barely fit it in her mouth... open wider for us..." König said pulling on your jaw to keep your mouth wide.

Their hands on their hips while they stared down at you. Saying degrading phrases while you whimpered sucking them separately, then sucking their tips together.

Your heavy breath making them twitch and groan together. Ghosts hips began to thrust into your hand while you sucked on König. Your head bobbing back and fourth swallowing the pre-cum that dripped out of him.

Your confidence sky rocketed to an all time high. You've always loved being the center of attention. The fantasy of having more than one man focus on making you feel good drove you crazy.

Ugh, each sound they'd make would all be because of you. Even if they were degrading you, you enjoyed every last minute of it. Because yeah, only whores would enjoy slutting themselves out to more than one man.

You were no longer worried about covering yourself up. The only way you wanted to be covered up is by their balls emptying out onto you like you were a sock they jizzed into.

Ghost then stood behind you and pulled your hair for you to throw your head back. He shoved himself into your mouth again making you take him deep into your throat. Your eyes watered at the amount of force. But you chugged it up and chose to deal with it. Moans muffling on his cock sending vibrations through his body.

"She's taking me in so well... first place goes to Y/n- ughh~ She's a champion at this... fucking whore." He stated while slapping your face gently.

König held onto your throat making you feel tighter for Ghost. His hips thrusting into your hands as you kept them clasped together to hopefully mimic the feeling of him being inside you. He whimpered softly but also joined in slapping your face to still keep himself focused on being dominant towards you.

"That's right... ughh fill that void in your body with cock... that's my perfect slut..."

Mmm~ fuck. You could feel your vagina becoming more wet as you listened to what König said. Being degraded but having 'MY' put in front of any belittling statement turned you on even more.

"She's more than perfect... hngghh~ alright suck him off... she's going to make me come already." Ghost said pulling his hips back and allowing you to give König special attention. You placed your hands on König's thick thighs, closing your eyes to suck your throat around him.

Your tongue swirling in all directions, head turning so he could penetrate your cheek and every crevice his cock could find. You let him go with a pop before licking up his shaft and tracing the sensitive throbbing veins scattered the thick, uncut, and girthy length.

"Hey!- eyes on me..." He demanded snapping his fingers in your face. Your eyes darted open and glanced up at him fulfilling his request.

You could hear Ghost heavily groaning behind you. His hand riding up and down his shaft, thumb pressing on his tip to force pre-cum out of himself. He pulled your hair so you could look at him too. You moaned at the amount of attention feeling your clit tingle making you even more wet on the inside.

Ghost couldn't believe how skilled you were in this department. Just by looking at you he assumed that you didn't know anything about sucking cock. You and König's relationship had been so private and reserved from other people until now. He was shocked when König told him about your little 'crush' on him.

He agreed out of pure lust that he had festering for you that had been within him for a long time. He would have made advances at you but König had already put claim on you first.

"Ahh ahh ahhh~♡ Am I doing a good job? Please tell me I'm doing good..." You asked clenching your thighs together with a submissive whimper. "No, you're doing a bloody horrible job... you poxy slag." Ghost said being sarcastic, his british accent coming out more clear.

You whimpered and turned your head to kiss his tip while staring up at him. Using your hands to jerk König off.

"Awe you love when I call you a slag? You dumb cunt, you don't even know what it means... shut up and take my cock... kissing it isn't going to please anyone..." He said pulling your hair and sliding himself in your mouth once you whimpered in pain. Tears gushing out of your eyes aswel.

____

Both of the men held a chunk of your hair and kept your head back for you to look up at them. Their hands working overtime on their shafts for them to cover your face in come in unison. Your tongue sticking out and smile on your face. "Aghhhff~ Pheathh hoge ogghh hyy haath~♡"

(Ahhh~ please come on my face~♡")

They both slapped your face, König slapping your right cheek and Ghost slapping your left. "Mmmyeahhh~ come on... I want you guys to come on my face... I need it... I'm such a whore, I need come on my face to live~ please don't keep me waiting..." You begged spitting on their tips and taking them in your mouth, swirling your tongue in an infinity sign before flicking your tongue in the middle.

"Halt die Klappe, du schwanzgeiler Lump..." König groaned sliding himself further in your mouth to push Ghost out of the way.

("Shut the fuck up you cock hungry come rag...")

"Hggnnmm I'm sorry König~" You moaned rolling your eyes back and intentionally gagging on him.

König held the top of your head while Ghost held your jaw again. Both of them thrusting into your mouth penetrating your esophagus out of unison to cause friction between them. The two then thrusted once more before pulling out of you sloppily and pumping their hands on their shafts staring down at you.

You didn't speak, you instead just sat there waiting for your desert. Their groans made you want to touch yourself, the tingling feeling turned into pressure inside your clit. You were just aching to be touched.

"Nimm jeden – aghh~ letzten Tropfen, du wunderschöner – C-Cock-Wrangler..."

("Take every- aghh~ last drop you beautiful- c-cock wrangler...")

König moaned pushing himself inside your mouth to come inside. You moaned nodding enjoying the feeling of his hot sticky come coat your tonsils. You looked at Ghost while sucking his tip encouraging his finish until he choked on his words and loudly groaned, face scrunchung up at the nose as he covered your face like an artist would paint a canvas.

"Yeahh yeahh~ mhmm I love the taste of your come... it's so fucking good~♡" You moaned about to swallow his load.

"What a fucking whore... she's inatrual at sucking cock... shit, let's fuck her now..." Ghost stated while wiping his forehead free of sweat.

____

Ghost had you bent in half while fucking you standing up. His arms scooped under your knees with his hands clasped together behind your neck, forcing you to stare down watching him fuck you. You moaned everytime he thrusted, his cock head meeting with your cervix while your clit throbbed aching for contact. You didn't know what to do with your arms and allowed them to just fwail in the air.

König standing in front of you watching you moan and whimper at the size of another man's cock. He then held your waist and aligned himself with the same hole Ghost occupied. You were wet enough for both of them to take you.

You bit down onto your lip to not cry out as your entrance stretched beyond the size you had been used to all this time. Both of them groaned and pulled your body every other way they could so one of them could have more control over you.

You looked up at König who was groaning while rubbing your clit with his thumb. His free hands played with your breasts, pulling and pinching your nipples.

"König... please look at me... I'm sorry..." You whined assuming he was mad at you.

He rolled his eyes and placed his hand around your throat, still not willing or ready to akwnolage you. "Shut the fuck up." He demanded squeezing your throat tightly before letting go.

All you wanted was for him to look at you and also call you his good girl. He wasn't doing either of those things. The lack of praise and admiration made you upset. When having sex he makes it his mission to spoil you with praise, only degrading you when you'd ask. He loved you too much to call you a bitch or anything in bed without you asking.

"Ahhhh~ mmpleeaasee!" You repeated yourself hoping he'd hear you. You needed him to look at you so fucking bad. You felt embarrassed and ashamed for enjoying yourself.

He didn't do anything except continuing to choke you so you'd shut up. This was his punishment for you. He was cripplingly jealous and possesive over you. How dare you want to fuck someone else while with him? He obviously didn't feel like he wasn't enough for you, if that were the case then he wouldn't even be able to look at Ghost without getting angry.

He wouldn't dare let Ghost get close to you either.

It took every bone in his body for him to not give in and entertain you. Although your begging and whimpering did make him want to stare into your eyes while fucking you.

You sighed seeing your pleading was getting you nowhere and looked up at the ceiling attempting to not think about the overwhelming feeling of needing to cry.

The pleasure felt too good for you to hold yourself together. Not only that, you also couldn't deal with him still ignoring you.

König's cock penetrating upwards due to the lack of space inside you, Ghost penetrating downwards continuously making you feel like you have to use the bathroom.

Konig was causing pressure behind your urethra. Did you have to pee or squirt? You couldn't tell. Your face was burning up with heat, stomach twisting and turning with every thrust.

"Awe is she going to cry? That's so fucking cute... what an attention whore." He groaned slapping your face and mocking your feelings.

Your vagina was beginning to overstimulate too quickly. Your walls rejected their cocks on their own but grew wetter when they'd thrust back inside.

Ghost groaned deeply and thrusted harder, you received degrading words in your ear making you moan louder. "You fucking slut... take our fat cocks- aghh~ all you're good for is to be a personal fleshlight for us..."

"Ughh please! I need more!~ I can feel myself getting close!" You said desperately as König pulled out of you and laid down on the couch, motioning for Ghost to bring you over to him.

König groaned stroking himself with you over him. Your juices were like a lubricant ad he did so. Ghost pulled your hair so you could keep yourself up rather then giving out and letting König hold you.

"Fuck... she's so wet..." He grunted before lifting your hips with one hand and teasing your stretched entenece.

"Shit... I'm coming inside her for sure..." Ghost stated while slapping your ass to hear you whimper. You couldn't say anything. You know if you did it would either be a moan or a cry out for attention. Begging wasn't going to get you anywhere so what's the point.

"You do that and I'll fucking kill you." König said glaring at him. Everything that the two of them has done to you was perfectly fine. But you belonged to him, so he was the only one who could give you a creampie.

"Ha- what? You're afraid that I might get her pregnant aren't you..." Ghost responded with a cocky grin on his face.

"Not really scared. More so certain that this wouldn't happen again if you tried anything like that."

"Oh yeah? Don't try and start something you most certainly can't finish König... I'm only doing this because she wants me just as bad as I want her..."

Ghost then turned your head for you to look at him. Your come drunk eyes met with his. What were they talking about? You couldn't hear them, your mind was too fuzzy for you to care.

Next thing you know Ghost was making out with you while swirling his tongue around yours. He sloppily pulled your bottom lip with his teeth and turned your head to the side for a better angle. You moaned into his mouth and lifted your left hand to caress the back of his neck.

Oh god, and he's a good kisser? Fuck. He was making you so wet... his arm wrapped around your waist pulling your body close to him, König's hands held your hips and squeezed them until his knuckles were white. He was pissed. Watching Ghost make out with you to prove a point made him angry. He then aligned himself up with your entrance and forced you down on him. You broke the kiss with Ghost to whine proudly.

Saliva connected from your mouth to Ghost's. König groaned and pulled you down to him, holding you in his arms and burying his face into your neck.

You softly moaned rolling your eyes back and grinding your hips back and forth so your clit could feel his pubic hair brush against it. Ghost slapped your ass and slid inside the same hole again. König made sure you focused on him by kissing your neck and cheeks while glaring at Ghost.

He groaned and bit into your neck to make a hickey. You whimpered burying your face into his neck, feeling yourself about to come but kept quiet because of how badly you couldn't think.

"Du bist mein gutes Mädchen..." He groaned licking the bruised skin on your neck.

("You're my good girl...")

You lifted your head from his chest and looked at him. Pressing your lips together in disbelief that he said that. "I am? You're not mad at me?" You asked as your voice cracked.

He shook his head and showered your face in kisses. Holding your cheek and dragging his thumb on your warm skin. "Ich liebe dich so sehr..." He softly said to you and planted kisses on your lips.

("I love you so much...")

You felt tears building up in your eyes as that was all you needed to hear for you to be able to come. You whimpered leaning upwards to put your hands on his chest but he kept you down to him because he wasn't finished.

"Du gehörst mir... Du gehörst ganz mir... du bist mein braves Mädchen... Ich liebe dich Y/n... Fuck~" He grunted thrusting harder into you and making you scream his name.

("You belong to me... You're all mine... you're my good girl... I love you Y/n... Fuck~")

"I love you too... fuck me harder... I'm gonna come~ please both of you fuck me harder!" You moaned feeling the knot in your stomach twist and turn just threatening to burst.

They pulled out of you again only for a split moment. König turned you around for you to lay on your back while still on top of him so you could face Ghost for a while. He snaked his arm around your waist keeping you close to him though, his other hand hooked under your right leg so he could rub your clit.

Ghost squeezed and played with your breasts while thrusting upwards into you. Their thrusting would be out of sync at first but in order to get you to moan more consistently they stoped glaring at eachother with daggers in their eyes and made it a goal for you to come first.

König moaned your name along with praises while bouncing you up and down. You held onto the back of his neck with your right hand and pulled Ghost down to you for vivid eye contact. No matter what face he made he made sure to not look away from you.

You whimpered and clenched around them, sucking their cocks inside whenever they pull back to rut into you again. Hearing König praise you in his native language while rubbing your clit, and Ghost staring at you was a dangerous combination.

You couldn't hold your composure anymore. Your whole body was sore and tingling with pleasure. You didn't want this night to end, it's been like heaven itself. You didn't want to leave their embrace ever again.

Ghost grunted and took your hand off of him, he held it in his hand and began to shower it with kisses. You watched him as his eyes rolled back once you clenched around them again.

"You're so fucking beautiful princess... you take us in excellently... you're such a good girl for taking us inside that pretty little cunt sweetheart."

Oh my fucking god. What did be want from you? Did they want you to just scream how much you loved them? You felt the need to say those words conjuring up inside you. Don't say it... don't fucking say it... he doesn't actually mean it... it's just sex talk... don't fucking say it...

"Ahhhh Ghost~♡ K-König~♡ I'm gonna- I- I- ughhh..."

"Let it out for us... be a good girl and let it out... come on... I want you to come on our cocks..." König groaned into your ear slapping your clit and rubbing it while applying more pressure.

"Mhmm... it feels so fucking good doesn't it? We're stretching you out so much... your little pussy can't take it... you're such a good fucking girl for us..."

"Yes yes yes it feels so good~ I can't take it... oh my god!" You helplessly whimpered pressing your hand on Ghost's stomach to slow him down.

"You can take it... I know you can... take us deep inside... you're doing so fucking well for us..."

They thrusted slower and deeper to get you to hopefully squirt or better. König turned your head for you to look at him and held your face now sloppily kissing you and biting onto your lip. You moaned into his mouth sucking his lip with yours and whimpered as Ghost rubbed your clit to keep up the amount of pleasure you were experiencing.

König broke the kiss with you and stared into your eyes aswel. You pressed your lips together as tears rushed down your face. They both payed full attention to you and comforted you by kissing you. Ghost held onto the couch and moaned in your ear, followed by saying your name intentionally making his accent thicker.

Say it... just say it... you know you'll mean everything when you do say it. Say those three words... come on Y/n, say it... it's not just sex talk. You mean so much to them.

"Don't cry baby... you're so close to coming... you got this... don't cry... get yourself sorted... you can do it... I'm so proud of you... good fucking girl..."

Shiiittt~ Ghost stop... why does he keep saying that type of stuff. He fucking knows what he's doing.

"Say it... say you're our good girl... you belong to us from now on... say it... right now." König demanded while slapping your clit.

You cried harder and clenched around them uncontrollably. Closing your eyes for a breif moment until Ghost snapped his fingers to keep your eyes on him. He pressed his forehead onto yours and thrusted upwards into your g-spot. König thrusted into your cervix, lifting your legs up and bending them at your shoulders. Ghost groaned deeply and held your ankles to keep your legs in place.

Fuck. Now they're working together- say it... say it... say it... say it... say-

You whimpered and held your breath now so worked up that you forgotten how to let go. Your face was hot as it ever was. Once you opened your mouth and screamed and threw your head back.

Your orgasm was bigger than you expected it to be. Your legs shook aggressively along with your arms. You spoke in tongue saying anything that came to mind. They still thrusted inside you to work themselves further to orgasm. You bit your lip making it bleed because of how hard you bit.

Your mouth opened wide and there it was. You said it.

"KöniiggGhost!Aahhhhhhh I LOVE YOU! IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyou!!"

You cried loudly uncontrollably clenching yourself around them, keeping yourself tight making it harder for them to thrust.

Their faces scrunched up in mutual pleasure as they let out many moans that were all followed by your name. Ghost rubbed your clit feeling his come shoot inside you, your walls pulling on his shaft further squeezing his loud out. Making him whimper and try to stop himself but couldn't.

König had groaned planting his feet into the floor and using his inpressive lower body strength to fuck his come deep up inside you. You whimpered trying to gain your composure but couldn't. They were still thrusting to make their erections come down. Their cocks slipping and sliding together due to the mess they both made inside you.

You cried out this time with pure desperation as you could feel your vagina reject them desiring to return to normal size again. They both sighed in pleasure finding it wouldn't be a good idea to pull out at the same time. Ghost then slipped out of you with a delicate moan. He slapped your clit many times and rubbed you while watching their come drip out of you.

"Ghossstt~ n-no... I'll- hgnnnggghhh~ s-squuuirt~" Your toes curled as you begged him to stop but he refused to listen to you. You then felt König pull out of you due to his cocks unbeatable amount of sensitivity.

Your legs shook again and there you were squirting on the couch making another mess that they'd have to clean up.

"Mhmm... that pretty little cunt is so sensitive... look at our pretty girl... good job..." König encouraged while making small slaps on your ass as a congratulations.

You whimpered to tell them to stop. They laughed in unison as König moved you to the side so he could sit up and gain his composure for once. You couldn't move anymore. You were sore and also too tired to even open your eyes.

You sighed heavily and covered your face. Squeezing your thighs together, feeling your entrance throb. Their creampies dripping out of you and onto the couch.

____

What happened after you Ghost and König were finished went by like a blur.

You couldn't recall anything after that and assumed you passed out. You woke up in bed with your clohes on. You felt clean like you had taken a shower but you don't remember taking one. A bandaid on your neck along with healing gel to cover up- a hickey?

You thoughts had been interrupted by loud snoring coming from both sides of the bed. You couldn't move like you wanted to for some reason. Two muscular arms holding certain parts of your body and deep occasional groans.

You looked to your left and saw König laying next to you, his face buried in your chest and arms around your waist. Okay, that's normal.

So you looked behind you and saw- Ghost? He laid next to you with his face buried into your back, legs intertwined with yours along with something poking your back.

He moved himself closer to you and wrapped his arm around your waist to still feel your comforting body heat even while he's sleep.

"What the fuck?" You said before remembering what happend before you fell asleep.

[etherealstar-writes]

I WANNA BE YOURS | WOSO X READER | PT 13

pairings: woso x reader

summary: in which you're accidentally added to a random group chat, not knowing they're all actually famous footballers, and obliviously end up having many of them competing for your love and attention.

part: thirteen

part one here

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

liked by ellatoone, alessiarusso99, leahwilliamsonn and 5000 others

yourusername: i'm so proud of you guys!! euros champions wooh!! 🤍💙

lottewubbenmoy: 💙💙

ellatoone: tysm!!

alessiarusso99: 💙💙💙

leahwilliamsonn: nahh what is that photo of me ↳ yourusername: lookin buzzin ↳ ellatoone: buzzin fr

stanwaygeorgia: still can't believe you wore that old rusty metal's jersey instead of mine 😔 ↳ lucybronze: it's because i'm her fav ↳ stanwaygeorgia: you wished

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

(doing a bit of timeskip and let's pretend it's been like around two months since the euros bcuz yeah)

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

THE NATIONAL DIVING TEAM

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ guys look at what leah and i found this morning

stairway YOU GUYS WENT WITHOUT ME ?!

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ well i was gonna offer you but leah said you were busy

stairway WHAT NO I WASNT

willlybum oh well that's so sad

earpsy so this is why you were late to training

willybum i forgot we had training

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ more like wanted to forgot

willybum oi don't expose me like that

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ :)) so how's training going

neev y/n save me from this torture we'll go to nandos together and drag jessie along too

the imposter aka y/n ❤️

neev added flaming hot

flaming hot stoppp not this nickname 😭😭 and we can't go to that nandos place anymore did you two forget? we're banned from last time

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ and who's fault was that miss flaming hot

flaming hot i blame niamh for all that

neev bruh you were literally the one that said you could handle the flaming hot sauce fleming and then practically screamed dramatically about how you were dying which got us kicked out

flaming hot I WAS NOT DRAMATIC AND YOU WERE THE ONE THAT PEER PRESSURED ME IN THE FIRST PLACE

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ it was incredibly funny ngl i mean you couldn't really tell the difference from jessie's face and her national jersey colour

flaming hot stop ittt you two are meanies it literally wasn't that bad i recovered fine

neev um you were literally crying the whole day jessie

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ and we had to buy you like twenty iced drinks for you to finally cool down

look this is you finally calming down after your twelfth drink

neev yeah not our fault you can't handle any spice flaming hot fleming but we're still kidnapping you and taking you to another nandos place tonight

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ we sure are

flaming hot i'm gonna pull a houdini

lotte oooh i wanna come along to nandos!

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ you're very welcome to

stairway me too!

neev absolutely not

stairway excuse you how can lotte come with you guys but not me?!

neev bcuz she isn't annoying like you are

stairway

neev

elton no wayy you guys

willybum oh my god i do not have the effort for this today what is she going to say

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ oh no

the REAL karate kid

ona batlle uh should i be scared?

kie very much

flaming hot what is happening?

stairway

elton did you guys know that you can lick someone's elbow (also known as their wenis) and they can't feel it

lotte righttt of course i needed to know this

flaming hot HELP WHAT 😭😭

neev the fact that i just saw georgia look at me after reading that seriously concerns me

the REAL karate kid unfortunately it's true 😭😭 she licked my wenis

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ ..... yeah i have no words

ona batlle 😭😭

steph what the hell 😭😭

rusty metal i wondered why everyone stopped working out and started looking at each other ella, i do not wanna know why you know that, and can everyone stop trying to lick each other's elbows it's freaking me out 😭😭

kie i'm convinced ella has no thoughts behind those eyes it is just elevator music. on repeat. all day. every day.

stairway i think lucy's wenis needs a licky lick

rusty metal georgia get the hell away from me

elton ALSO if you look at any object near you right now you know in your head what it would feel like when you lick it like the texture and stuff

mccard nahh that's insane i haven't licked everything near me so why would i know how it would feel?

lotte why did i just see rachel and millie taking glances at each other

rusty metal GEARGIA ISTG DONT YOU DARE TAKE A STEP TOWARDS ME CAN YOU ALL PLS STOP TRYING TO LICK THINGS WITH YOUR IMAGINATIONS Y'ALL ARE FESTY OMG 😭��

esme NAAAHHHHH WHY DID NIAMH ACTUALLY JUST LICK SOME STUFF TO CONFIRM IF SHE IMAGINED IT RIGHT THIS IS SO WRONG 😭😭😭

flaming hot of course she would do that 😭😭

meado

steph is this just a daily occurrence for you guys? is this normal?

door knob i'm sad to admit that it is

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ i'm kinda glad i'm not near any of this rn

flaming hot fr

neev well i wanted to know if my brain was tricking me or not

esme you didn't need to lick it tho mate 😭😭

neev

alex nahh i'm done i'm leaving the gym just saw daly start walking towards bright like she was preparing to lick her i can't witness this today 😭😭

kie why am i not surprised that it's ella that started this again?

the imposter aka y/n ❤️

ona batlle amen to that

steph seconded so glad kyra and charli aren't in this chat to contribute to this chaos omg

flaming hot amen fr 😭

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ omg kyra and cha cha! we need to add em in here too

stairway wait a sec y/n YOURE NOT BRITISH?!

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ nopee lived in england almost all my life but proud aussie here 💪🇦🇺

steph ayeee 🇦🇺

willybum i cannot believe this

elton you're an imposter fr

neev and here we thought you were one of us

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ heyy i am an honourary lioness member isn't like lessi half italian?

thet REAL karate kid yeah?

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ see and she's playing for england i can support both the lionesses and tillies

willybum okay but now that the wsl is starting the more important question is which club do you support?

stairway oh yeah

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ oh uhh i gtg do something really important rn talk to you guys later! bye!

neev y/nnnnn dont forget our nandos!! i'll be waiting!!

the imposter aka y/n ❤️ i won't! better be prepared fleming

flaming hot oh no

✦ ——— ✦ ——— ✦

part fourteen here

[suiana]

I cant do this anymore our science and ap subject now have math

so sorry to hear that babe... but imagine dying and ur yandere! scientist who's your best friend that's not-so-secretly in love with you brings you back to life after you accidentally die

you're dazed, body completely stiff and sore as you take in your surroundings. huh... why did it feel like you just woke up from a super duper long nap? where were you? weren't you dead? you were pretty sure that you got hit by a truck when you were walking home...

that's when you realize that you were chained to a bed.

"what the-?!"

"good morning darling! did you sleep well?"

your best friend pops out from nowhere, surprising you as he holds out a few of his thingy majigs. what? were you in his... home or something? doesn't look like it but since he's here it's not completely impossible-

"you're in my lab, my cute lil frankestein ❤️"

???

um... were you hearing correctly or did he just call you frankestein?

"whaha... funny joke my guy-"

and then you sit up and realise that he wasn't joking. you really did look like a freak of nature. a real frankestein.

your skin was stitched together, the colour looking almost green and- what the hell did you lose an eyeball?

"you-! did you steal my body from the cemetery?!"

"i couldn't let my darling die now, could i?"

the scientist merely shakes his head, clicking his tongue. you could only stare at him in horror as he begins going on another one of his stupid rambles about how he needed you by his side and how he would die if you weren't there with him.

"uh, i never said it when i was alive but dude, don't you think you like me a little too much? it's almost like you love me or something haha-"

"oh my, wasn't it obvious? i am in love with you."

oh my balls.

"if it wasn't obvious from how i talked to you, i'm pretty sure it is through my actions. i mean,"

he pauses, looking at you before sighing dreamily. he clasps his hands together, wearing a crazed look on his already crazy face. you could only shiver as he presses a kiss to your forehead and sits down uncomfortably close to you.

"i brought you back to life after all."

you feel your mouth grow dry at his words, unable to get anything out. what were you supposed to say to that? i mean, yeah, you think he's devoted if he brought you back...? like???

"good news though! i found a way to help you live forever! you won't ever die now!"

"what?!"

if it were possible, you think your only remaining eye would've rolled out of your skull as well.

"oh don't worry, my sweet darling. when the time comes i'll make myself a frankestein too! that way we can be together forever!"

that was not what you wanted to hear, damnit.

sure you loved him as a friend but now that you know that he likes you? and that he's crazy enough to steal your body from the cemetery (which you're 99% sure is a crime) AND bring you back to life... you're pretty sure you'd be trying to find another way to die if you had to spend the rest of time with him ngl.

"we'll never be apart again ❤️"

oh hell nah you're getting BACK in the coffin

[rapunzelbro]

I've been reading your fabulous Lucifer and tall reader. I found a tiktok for a Lucifer scenario. I thought it was perfect just hiding little duckies all over the castle and hotel for Lucifer to find and to also piss Alastor off. 🙂

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8vdXanP/

The Great Duck Hunt of The Century! Ft. Lucifer & Alastor!

This title is so so so fucking specific. Remember my hiatus? Yeah I don’t remember either. I feel like I like writing for Lucifer and Angel more ngl and silly prompts like these give me inspiration. Idk why anywho enjoy~ Angel , Reader, Lucifer, Alastor Husk

Masterlist Taglist

Throughout your relationship with Lucifer you always found new ways to spice it up in the bed room

If you thought sex well, that too

But you meant something else, and that was The Great Duck Hunt of The Century!

What is it you may ask?

Well let’s just say Lucifer made a bunch of mini ducks out of pure boredom one day with you. So you snagged them all when you two were done with them

And spent the next 7 hours placing 500 in the castle and 500 in the Hazbin Hotel

Why? Because why the fuck not

Lucifer was excited and was happily looking around but when you got a text from Angel you knew you were fucked, screwed, in trouble

“Girl what tf did you do”

“Whatever do you mean?”

Why is Smiles yelling about finding ducks all over the hotel”

“Husk is literally finding them in the liquor bottles and choked on one of them and not the good kinda choke if you know what I mean” “🍆💦”

“I made a scavenger hunt for Lucifer that’s all 🫢”

“You didn’t hide any in my room did you”

“Hell no you’re my friend”

“Aw thank you sweetie💗 might wanna avoid the hotel for a while he is pissed I’ll keep rehiding them though. Ttyl babe~”

“Thanks for the warning”

Yeah uh let’s just say, after Lucifer did find a majority of them. Him being short Didn’t give him an advantage and you mentioned to him there’s a ton left so out comes Lucifer in bird mode

Dude is flying throughout his castle knocking so much shit over in the process to find these ducks and he is so fucking happy? Dude is so glad you did this.

It went on for hours

When you finish counting what he found you announce he found 500/1000

“HOLY SHIT THERES MORE??”

He didn’t know how you had so much dedication but he did and was ready to go to the hotel to find the rest

You texting Angel

“How many did he find?”

“I wanna say 100? This radio demons is ripping this hotel apart for them, Charlie thinks her dad did it but I let her in on it and told Vag. They think it’s funny as fuck. Well Charlie not as much but Vag is dying over here”

“omg did I tell you there’s bets being placed on this shit on if he burns the building down or not? Get your ass over here “

Lucifer makes a portal for you two because stepping into the hotel

Holy

Shit

It was a mess?? There were spots you didn’t even put any that were destroyed

“What the actual fuck?”

Everyone is just at the bar watching shit go down as Alastor is ripping the hotel apart for the ducks.

Lucifer is no where to be seen. This man’s instantly looking for the ducks and fixing up the building as he goes for his daughters sake

Alastor noticing you just appeared and him going up to you with his demon form practically almost fully out from his pissed this man is

“I’m hoping it wasn’t you who did this, or I’m afraid ł’ⱠⱠ ₱ɆⱤ₴Ø₦₳ⱠⱠɎ Ⱨ₳VɆ ₮Ø Ɽł₱ ɎØɄ Ⱡł₥฿ ฿Ɏ Ⱡł₥฿ Ʉ₦₮łⱠ ɎØɄ ⱤɆ₥ØVɆ ɆVɆⱤɎ ₴ł₦₲ⱠɆ Ø₦Ɇ Ø₣ ₮ⱧɆ₴Ɇ ₣Ʉ₵₭ł₦₲ ĐɄ₵₭₴”

His voice getting so fucking loud and static holy shit it was scary but you just back away as quickly as possible before Lucifer comes out with a fuck ton of the mini ducks before running infront of you.

Lucifer and Alastor stare at each other before Lucifer almost fucking launches at his ass for yelling at you

You instantly having to hold him back

“Listen you find these fuckers easily right? Help me find them and I won’t have to kill your little girlfriend”

“Haha fuck you. I’d love to see you try. I’m looking on my own terms “

Yeah he highkey didn’t want to take that chance regardless but he wasn’t lying when he said he was looking on his terms. Him bringing the ducks back to you as he found them

You counting them but Angel distracting you so much you had to double count everything like four times.

When he found them all the hotel surprisingly didn’t burn down, which caused almost everyone to give Husk money

“Hah.. old cats still got it”

Yeah Husk knew it wouldn’t be that dramatic considering if it had any involvement with you, or Lucifer, Lucifer could’ve easily fixed the building before it got to the point of that

He is fucking good

Alastor making the ducks dissolve in thin air once you counted them all and confirmed they were all found and Lucifer mourning the loss of his ducks while you and Charlie awkwardly comfort him.

Alastor instantly going back to his room with the worlds most irritating smile

“Please when you have this.. duck hunting again..you have it NOT HERE”

“Well that went better than I thought..”

And that was the end of the Great Duck Hunt of the century

It was the most fun Lucifer ever had.

And to see Alastor in that state was the icing on the cake.

He loved you so much and was 100% going to make himself a trophy since he found them all

It’s just the little things you do or even in this case the big things that make him appreciate you even more

Especially if it involves pissing off Alastor my god you got hella bonus points for that shit

Lucifer Taglist: @vendetta-ari @brithedemonspawn @katshyperfixations @aphestina @satansmanager @irethepotato @storydays @saturnhas82moons @zamadness

[pokegalla]

Requested by @tryslogic

Ngl never thought of this but it’s gonna either be really funny or really sweet. There is no in between-

Killer and Lust with a crazy rich S/o who loves spoiling them

Lust:

* Oh this poor sweetheart was just expecting you to ask for “service” since you kept flirting with him everytime you visited Grillby’s. He found it charming though as you were always making him laugh too. It surprised him really when instead of that, you actually asked him out instead! Especially when he learned you were rich. Like are you sure you want me??? You could literally have anyone! But it just made him feel extra loved that you genuinely liked him for him. He didn’t really care about your money✨

* He’s actually very humble when it comes to gift receiving. Because he’s not used to such nice and thoughtful gifts! So whether it’s a simple rose to a HUGE teddy bear to even the finest wardrobe? He’s a blushing mess, always left surprised and still asking if it’s really ok. (Please reassure him!)

* Despite you spoiling him, he sure as hell is spoiling you too. You definitely have received gifts over time. His gifts weren’t as expensive…..but the thing is, the value of it is something money can’t buy✨ he’s made custom clothes just for you, stitched by HIS hands. Adorable picture books of you, him, even family and friends! Oh and the cuddles, smooches, and fun dates?!

* He’s a romantic guy and he’ll make sure to bring a smile to your face and give you the love you deserve

Mini story time:

“Huh? You have another surprise for me? Goodness you spoil me too much love….” Lust giggles.

You laugh too, “Well I can’t help it. Your smile and blush makes it worth it everytime.”

Lust playfully nudges you, “Oh stop it you!”

You laugh and take his hand in your own. You knew this surprise was probably the biggest you’ve ever given him. But it was an investment that you won’t regret. And you knew Lust would make you proud. So you walk him up to an old building. It looked refurbished and cleaned up already. You open the door with the key.

He looked around in wonder, “Wow…..what place is this?”

“Your new boutique,” You said casually. Lust looked at you in shock. You knew he loved making clothes…..”You have talent Lust. Everyone deserves to know you have something special…..and I’m willing to help show that.”

He actually tears up from this….this was….too sweet. He’s NEVER had such kindness in his life before. You made him feel…..like he actually had value. He hugged you and smiled with purple tears coming down.

“Thank you”

Killer:

* Ah here we go with this lil shet. Now with him, y’all probably got together randomly. He probably saw you on his day off and threw you a pick up line for funsies. Next thing you know, you both exchange numbers and become true love birds. Funniest part? It took him AWHILE to learn you were even rich- probably like a few weeks or a month. He thought it was cool and didn’t really think much of it.

* Now what shocked him was you spoiling him- he literally joked about wanting a PS5. Which he did want but he ain’t got no money- next day? Boom. You pop up with a whole ass PS5 with games he might like. His initial reaction: “Heh nice prank babe”. Oh- oh you weren’t? HOLY SHIT YOU ACTUALLY GOT HIM-?! The way he excitedly jumped up like a happy puppy, you knew you had to spoil him more-

* He absolutely shows you off to his team. Mostly out of a joke but also to be an absolute dick- like just smirking at his teammates, hell even his BOSS, just having an arm around your shoulder to say “My bae spoils and loves me soooooo much✨” Everyone wishes to beat your bonefriend’s ass- not you though. Because honestly you probably spoil them too. So you get a pass. And your bonefriend looking like he done got betrayed-

* He’s a silly little gremlin and honestly he does feel bad that he can’t spoil you more. So he’ll make sure to make you laugh and have fun no matter what.

Mini story time:

Ah the date went well as usual. A fancy dinner, a stop at an ice cream shop, and a walk through the park together under the moonlight. And you couldn’t stop laughing. Killer had been making you laugh the entire night, talking about his latest shenanigans with his group.

“And then after Dust wiped off the pie cream, he chased us ALL around the castle until Nightmare nabbed us and put us in our rooms! Dadmare moment✨,” He said with a chuckle.

“PFFFFT- Dadmare?!” You laughed again, “Killer you’re so cute….but god you’re chaotic-“

Killer takes your hand then kisses it, winking at you, “A chaotic cutie that you love so much~”

You blush but smile, “Yeah…..someone I will always cherish.” You swore for a moment, his eye lights popped up and his target like soul shifted into a heart for a moment.

“………heh. You’re too sweet babe…..,” He says with a nervous chuckle. You were surprised….but you couldn’t resist spoiling him one more time: with a kiss on the cheek. His skull flared with a beautiful shade of red. You giggle as he hid his face and tried acting cool about it. Ah……

You truly love this skellie.

[airborneice]

sooo I think this ended up being my tribute art to hilda the series? almost a whole year after the show ended but oh well 🤷‍♀️

if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to ramble about how much the show means to me for a bit -

Soooo I really really love this show. It is so delightful in every way, from the heartwarming and funny writing to the insanely beautiful visuals. You can tell that every aspect of this show was made with so much love and care and it truly has a type of charm to it that I’ve never seen in anything else. I’m really glad it exists and got the run that it did.

While I was drawing this I kept thinking back to a recent quote from Luke Pearson about how iconic to the series that little red cabin in the wilderness is, even though it was only there for a couple of episodes/comics - pretty much everything that happened in the show is because the story moved on from there and Hilda found new settings and characters and her world got so much bigger, but at the end of the day, that place is where it all started.

When I was re-watching season 1 clips to get art references it took me right back to 2018 when the show first aired. I remember often putting on the season 1 soundtrack while I was scanning animations under the rostrum when I was at uni late and re-watching the episodes when I was feeling down and needed a bit of cosyness. I was Going Through It in late 2018 for a number of reasons and this quickly became my comfort show, and that’s probably a part of why I still love it years later - things are way better but it’s just lodged there in my heart now.

And uh…not to get all cliché but…this show really did help point me towards where I am now. While I was at uni I’d study clips of it from time to time to see how the animators achieved what they did and I learned some useful stuff here and there. like..someone’s animation breakdown video on Hilda is what introduced me to the concept of arcs (I was on an animation course so I should’ve known abt arcs already but oh well. better late than never 🫠) and a ton of animation stuff made more sense to me after that. I can look at some of my very old animations and pin-point a principle or a little cheat that I learned from studying Hilda. On top of that, at my uni we focused on hand-drawn animation (on paper first and then. photoshop of all things 😑) so that was the whole scope of my animation knowledge, and I was really fascinated by how 2D rig shows like Hilda even worked.

In the end I got so curious that I took a toonboom course after I graduated and started figuring it out for myself. I didn’t really know what to do with myself in the immediate post-graduation job search hell, but I wanted to learn more skills and Hilda looked like the type of show I wanted to be on more than anything, so I made a point of learning the stuff that might get me there. And learning rig anim was extra fun bc it helped me understand how this show was made and appreciate it even more :) It truly lit up an enthusiasm in me for all the technical behind-the-scenes stuff in cartoons that still keeps me motivated to this day. anddd long story short I’m a 2D rig animator now so I guess it worked out! ngl I think it’s very funny that I stanned Hilda so hard it got me a job on a disney show. how does that even happen. (and I’ve even had the honour of working with some of the people who made Hilda so in a way it feels like it’s all come full-circle now :) )

And obviously, it’s been really fun being in the fandom with everyone and being insane together. It’s wild that it’s been 6 years of that. I’m glad for the cool people I met and all those fun times. I’m really glad I got to be a part of that.

Soo yeah!! lovely show. thank you

[lilybecca1]

Hi! Can I ask your top 5 fav BKDK fics recs? Thx so much 🥰

Hi! Sure! *Pulls out a list*

Okay just kidding

I've read like a TON of bkdk fics so far but the ones that actually got to me are just a few.

Starting with: The Way You Used To Do by edema_ruh

Yeah, no one can say that it's overrated because it's the absolute best bkdk fic I have ever read out of, well, A LOT. It's also the first ever bkdk fic I have ever read, which doubles the attachment I have towards that fic cause imagine being introduced to the world of fanfictions about your favorite ship and starting out with THE saint scroll of BakuDeku 😭 that fic set the bar higher than the freaking Mount Everest and it left a lasting scar in me so yeah, I don't think any other fic will ever top that one. It's a must read, if you're a BKDK shipper and haven't read it yet that's illegal. TWYUTD is my shrine.

Second one, I would have to say In the Dark by Jane_Harl0w. Actually, my top 4 fic recs are all some of the first fics that I have read so that probably contributes to the reason why I have such high expectations of bkdk fics 😂 Like the beginning of In the Dark, holy sh*t. Almost as good as TWYUTD. And the ending freaking broke me. (Spoilers ahead). I remember reading the second to last chapter and I kid you not, I was in DISTRESS, cause there was only one more chapter left and no way the story was going to have a good ending cause they were kidnapped and there's no way in hell they would survive and escape when there's ONE chapter left. And then I clicked on the last chapter and saw the "Trigger warning: s**cide" and I broke 😭 I'm pretty sure I cried for hours cause I seriously believed they were gonna die and the absolute DREAD I felt when I knew the story wasn't going to have a good ending. But then it actually did have a good ending, and that's the only reason why In the Dark isn't number 1, because I would have been traumatized for life if the story actually ended how I thought it would.

There was also a lot of fluff and I loved their interactions, it reminded me of how they would have been like as childhood best friends. Although I kind of hated all the smut ngl, that ruined it for me a little. Without it, In the Dark would definitely rival TWYUTD for me.

Number 3: The Devil Ships ZeKu by xairylleactually. I had no idea what the fic's title was for such a long time cause my stupid ass didn't save it and I haven't been able to find it for MONTHS but someone finally found it so THANK YOU. It was about Deku and Bakugo finding out that fanfictions exist about each other and a whole lotta pining through it all. This one wasn't even finished, but it was the first time I ever came along this concept and the way it was written was reaaaaaally good.

Number 4 is Operation BakuDeku by ratnotfound

It's a crack fic, I remember it being hilarious af, also there's a lot of fluff. Really loved the texting theme in it and the class interactions. Even Mineta lmao. People can hate on him as much as they want but he can be funny as hell sometimes.

I actually wasn't sure what to put on the number 5 spot but I ended up with Fire Lily by EtherealBeing. The reason I loved this fic so much is because of the world building. Cause like goddamn I could make my own fanfiction about the world alone 😂 the angel world, the demon world, the lore behind God and the Deep, everything was so genuinely interesting to read that I swear I enjoyed the world building better than the actual bkdk in it lmao. (Although that church scene was kinda top tier ngl)

Also honorable mentions:

Deku Enchanted by s_the_queen (didn't finish it but the beginning was hilarious af, I swear it's one of the funniest I've read out of all of them. Deku basically gets hit by an obedience quirk which makes him obey whatever people ask from him, creating a lot of...interesting situations lmao )

They ship us? by Raltaya (don't remember it much but it was pretty good. It's about Bakugo and Deku finding out about their ship and then pining for each other)

If I Have You by dommymommy (it's not finished yet but the ANGST and it's not even the typical kind of angst, it's actually good and it deals with more mature feelings than just simple pining and being flustered around each other. Their relationship is much more grounded in this one, but with a lot more heavy feelings than other fics. I definitely recommend reading it, it filled my soul with warmth. It's the perfect example of when you know you love each other but it hurts too much to be together)

I've read tons of Villain Deku fics but so far Forget Me Not by Scorned_By_Thornz (WynterThornz) was the only one that actually made me believe that he COULD become a villain. The pure angst, humiliation, and sickening feelings between them is just wow. Prime example of how a relationship can turn bitter even though you love each other. Has a good ending, but man I feel sorry for Izuku for how they treated him in the fic.

Dreams Change People by FireRuby1 (it's a time travel fic where they get stuck in the past and relive their childhood experiences. Lots of good moments but the moment when Bakugo relived the river scene was what sold me.)

To Stand by Your Side by aeronines (also didn't finish this one cause I was too impatient...yeah, I have commitment issues, anyway...but this fic was actually really good, Bakugo is younger in this one and Deku is a pro hero, and it was very interesting to see their dynamic this way)

Hero Class Civil Warfare by RogueDruid (Icarius51) (Not specifically bkdk but Deku is really f*king smart in this one, the plot twists are insane, like fr kudos to the author for coming up with them cause I for sure would have never been able to. The story itself is about a competition between the Hero and the Villain team, and Bakugo is the leader of the Hero team while Deku is the leader of the Villain team. The Villain team is low-key badass in this one)

Mirror Image by Eleke (Bakugo gets sent through the multiverse in this one. Pretty interesting AUs appear, and I liked the ending a lot)

In Another Life by Hollandvice (A part of me died with this fic. But in a good way. Like it could have had the opportunity to complete break my soul if the ending went down differently, so thank f*ck that it didn't, I narrowly avoided future heart problems. It's damn well written and I recommend it to everyone who wants to read an emotionally impactful story)

Get on my Level by Mikacrispy (this time Bakugo is the pro hero and Izuku is the younger one. Lots of fluff and I really loved the ending, it was very touching)

To Win You Again (with trembling hands) by DoesItSaySassOnMyUniform (this fic was amazing, especially the ending. I absolutely loved their confession, it was the most realistic confession I have ever seen in any fic so far)

That's it, I hope you'll like these fics too! 💚

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Marilyn Monroe (How to Marry a Millionaire, Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, Some Like It Hot)— Ngl I thought you all were lying about sexual attraction until I saw Marilyn Monroe in Gentlemen Prefer Blondes

Shelley Winters (A Patch of Blue, A Place in the Sun)— She was originally set up to be like a classic bombshell, but ‘got tired’ of those roles and instead went for more interesting, complex characters. And she’s sooooooo good, her performance really makes A Place in the Sun for me, she brings such a quiet dignity to a character that could so easily have otherwise been this unkind caricature. Other fun facts: she was Jewish! She claimed that her ‘chutzpah’ was the reason she had so many affairs (including w notable hot men burt lancaster, william holden, and marlon brando)!

This is round 2 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Marilyn Monroe:

She's amazing!!! A classic bombshell, as well as a strong women who overcame so many obstacles. She also advocated for others, like Ella Fitzgerald.

That fucking saxophone that cuts in whenever she appears on screen in Some Like it Hot

I mean, it's Marilyn Monroe. She's adorable. She's gorgeous. She funny. She's the total package

She's the original American sex symbol, an iconic beautiful woman with eyes you could get lost in, legs for days, gorgeous hair, and a cute tummy. Her voice! Just listen to her voice!!!!!

She is considered one of THE sex symbols of the 1960s and one of the greatest actresses of all time! She HAS to be on this list!

no vintage movie woman is more iconically hot

People are most familiar with pictures of her in the white dress or the Happy Birthday Mr President one, but imo she is at her most beautiful and looks most comfortable when she is photographed by women like Eve Arnold

It’s Marilyn Monroe. If Aphrodite was an actual person, she’d be Marilyn. Do I really need to say more?

What can I say that hasn't been said? Marilyn's legacy is so much bigger than she was in life. She's a defining symbol of 50s and 60s Hollywood sex and it's obvious why. She was absolutely stunning and the camera loved her.

Shelley Winters:

started her career as more of a glamorous bombshell type and gradually transitioned to more of a (milfy as hell) character actress type but consistently slayed no matter what she was doing

[chimkennuggies]

Again with the Raphael x Cazador agenda bc I'm still losing my mind over them‼️‼️‼️

Anyway, thought I'd share some headcanons bellow the cut as well:

- I just KNOW they both have hour long conversations about some play they've seen or book they've read. Their taste is similar in that aspect.

- Raphael knows about Lady Incognita's books (that's canon btw) and mentioned it to Cazador once, who instantly started ranting about how the girl didn't appreciate the "gift" (he doesn't appreciate it either if you think about all that datamined/beta stuff + how much he just wants to be "normal" BUT he is also a hypocrite sooo), also, he used to give advice to her whenever he found one of her drafts.

- In a modern setting Raphael would probably be like those annoying filmbros who doesn't stfu about some niche film they've seen and Cazador would be the same with some celtic metal group that has like 24 monthly listeners (kinda projecting in this one, I'm both).

- They would talk shit about anyone + if they go to some ball together after the first 40 minutes they'll probably end up talking only to each other.

- On the hc that both of them are trans, Cazador hasn't had any operations and isn't on t (although it's not bc he's comfortable in his own body but bc he doesn't want to have anything to do with it, he just prefers to live with an idealized version he made on his head after centuries of not seeing his reflection), Raphael is literally the opposite, he has had all the operations and has been on t since he ran away from Cania, hating the self he left behind.

- Now, some shoutouts to the fact that they're both SO AWFUL, I love them being so so toxic.

- Cazador usually doesn't like being touched and Raphael just thrives on being an asshole so he's always breaking the man's boundaries. PDA in the worst possible way.

- Cazador enjoys to compare Raphael to his father because he finds it extremely entertaining the fact that he takes it at heart and gets so offended by it (he knows how much the other has suffered because of his progenitor).

- Cazador having scars on his body from before being a vampire and Raphael biting them‼️‼️

-Raphael listening to Cazador talking shit about all of Raphael's features he despises just to make him even more insecure (let's be real, Raphael is SO fucking self-conscious, because there's no way all his paintings and Haarlep themself being so completely different to his real self is a normal trait).

- Both of them being prone to violence and fighting for every minor disagreement would make them the worst neighbors possible ngl.

- Raphael having the lower canines really really sharp while Cazador has the cuspid canines being almost razor-edged, iykyk.

Lastly, here are some songs I associate w/ them because I haven't seen any playlist include these:

Cazador:

Rule #34 - Fish in a Birdcage

Femtex - Therapy?

Never Wanted to Dance - MSI

Under the Spell - Me And That Man

Heel On The Shovel - 16 Horsepower

Raphael:

The Hell Of It - Paul Williams

Low Estate - 16 Horsepower

Nunemaker's Parable - Everybody's Worried About Owen

You're So Vain - Carly Simon

Bensonhurst Blues - Oscar Benton

An this one is just bc I find it quite funny but Mi Gran Noche from Raphael (the spanish singer) is quite iconic ngl.