#i forgot what theyre actually called
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#126#deer#mule deer#buck#working on lighting#with ref#i did the dsrkest shadows with a more cool tone and tried warming up the slightly less dark shadows...#i forgot what theyre actually called#pretty much morr lighting practice 👍
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dollar store bag embroidery to put on my jacket . i like doing it on dollar store bags bc u get a nice snack with it plus u were gonna throw out that bag eventually anyway
if you cant tell i did taxidermy first thats why she looks bad lol
i wanna do the rest of the girls but at a later date. probs when the concept aalbum is done bc i have a lot more not tptm embroidery to do in the meantime lol
#tptm#tptm fanart#weevildoing#the post traumatic manifesto#faineant girl#splitter girl#chocolate box girl#taxidermy girl#punk#jacket patch#diy punk#band patches#<- i mean like. Technically#thats what theyre called in punk lingo but this is one (1) vocalo producer lol#that actually applies to the rest of the vocalo patches im making#oh also definitely need to tag#psychopunk#neuropunk#schizopunk#cripplepunk#that one too#i was gonna only tag the first three but i thenr ealized#oh im getting a cane soon. faineant is there. this deserves the tag cripplepunk#punk diy#punk patches#diy or die#diy patches#madpunk#I FORGOT MADPUNK. HOW COULD I
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been picking up the most godawful vocal stims lately
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oh goodness it’s debate time
#^ girl who has wasted all day very slowly watching the fanmade warrior cats danganronpa trial#I AM INVESTED#they kept it canon up til now#its diverging now#the actually killer in the books is likely innocent i am so curious as to who its supposed to be in this au#THIS IS SO WELL MADE?? OBSESSED with blixemi’s voice acting here. love her singing and her videos and now he danganronpa hollyleaf#rambles#i forgot what its called but leopardstar being the one to say “theyre split right down the middle” and initiating whatever that minigame wa#called is very fitting
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mutuals. i am getting caught in my own bitterness again...
#ill vent because this is basically my bedroom#my younger older brother is caught up in that phase of romantic love when nothing else matter but girlfriend#thats fine i guess it happens#the thing is he forgot about my birthday and i was sad. then he remembered that he forgot and called and said#heyyy lemme make it up to you. lets go grab dinner this weekend (last weekend)#he forgot he even said me and went wine tasting with his gf. so now im double sad AND pissed because#i said no to my friends who actually wanted to see me because i was under the assumption that we were going out#so i sent him a passive aggressive message like heyy dinner was great thx for that xd and he was like what dinner??#long story short he realized he fucked up again and invited me to dinner for realsies this time#but like. he isnt really inviting me? he and my niece were going to a kiddy place he promised he would take her and said i could tag along#i told him i realize now he just invited that to save face and to forget about it#but now im even sadder cuz i love my niece and she is always happy to see me... i just feel like im stupid or something#theyre going tomorrow and im debating on whether i should swallow my pride and go for her#i probably wont#im still not over it#anyway whatever i got work to do
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vivilly thoughts in my brained
#i want to draw him but i got so pissed earlier I couldn't even think straight 😭😭 SO I DIDN'T#ive been watching dsmp comps the whole day too. man i miss those times HDJCJEKFJ#feels nice actually being able to talk about this here though#no one can ignore me if i'm by myself#no one can make fun of me like this#i can just speak and speak and speak and maybe someone will hear. whoever that might be#ALSO I FORGOT THIS NAME IS ALSO SORT OF MY DISCORD USERNAME OH NO#so scared what if one of the dudebros from vivilly's server finds me AAAAHHHH#theyre like weirdly transphobic if i had pronouns in my bio they'd call me a woman#i hate his discord server actually#people can be so offensive#legit if a cis man with he/him in his bio went into that server and tried talking shit everyone would be like “WOMAN WOMAN WOMAN WOMAN”#it doesn't help because the ava situation viv talked about kind of showed how weird viv can be with pronouns too#like he used she her a few times but for the entire rest of the video he Seemingly Just Forgot#or he's one of those people that misgender the person in question when he's talking abt them before their transition#i really hope he isnt doing it on purpose though. he is such a comfort youtuber to me. him and palpers mean so much to me its fucking insane
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why does everything i get really into always end up being so god damn niche. by the year 2035 i am going to be blogging exclusively about the interpersonal relationships between the pillbugs and snails hiding underneath the bricks lining the flowerbeds in my parent's garden.
#im falling hard into the virvox guys rn sowwy. i like em a lot hee hee. i didnt realize just how small the fanbase for em was tho#actually i didnt realize how small the company that makes them were either. i got so used to the yamahas and cryptons of the vsynth world#that i forgot that like honestly. a lot of the voicebank makers and some of the software makers themselves#theyre like companies of like maybe 5 employees with like no funding LOL not a bad thing but i forgor#but yeah i was looking up to see if there was like. a fanon reason why people shipped takehiro and ryusei? not judging because i get it#i like took one look at the virvox guys and immediately slotted them as a very strange boyband (a catboy and a middle aged dragon man....)#and also took a second look at takehiro and ryusei and assumed they were childhood friends. i saw the doujin flash before my eyes#but also looking into it it seems the fanbase is also like. 20 people. and like 3 of them ship that#and at least one person ships whiteCUL and ryusei? why not LOL when it comes to vsynths sometimes a ship can be spearheaded by like#one very prolific artist HGDJKDFSHDJK which actually reminds me. honestly i dont really have many vsynth ships#i guess i dont really partake in a lot of shipping stuff deeply but i like romance!! you know i like love stories. you know this#i mean i keep calling the eclipsed sounds characters the celestial polycule for a reason tho. im not joking around about this#this is serious to me. they are stars and moons and suns and together they hang out and kiss. in the sky. this is serious to me#also i do like solaria x eleanor forte actually. its a bit random but i understand it. i understand it#and of course the aformentioned takehiro x ryusei. and also the whole virvox polycule. get that old man in here too#(what do they call people like me. a multishipper? i do that a lot. you know this from my otome game fanart LOL)#OH and i dont remember either of their names rn but i like that the cevio bank anju inami voiced has like a big fat crush on like#that girl with the brown hair. i like that theyre like. besties (turning into something more wink wonk)#thinks with all my brain. i think thats it. i dont know why theres so little. i think its because i think of them as like#audio sample libraries first and foremost and i forget about their characters and relationships LOL#but im not against the idea of making some audio sample libraries kiss...... not at all#picks up a guitar sampler and a sound effect cd. presses them together.#hee hee. they kiss
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number one doodle i never posted + a funny post-tpot 9 doodle, pasted rambling about it below v
"alien numbers true eldritch forms can kill many objects at Once or cause extreme pain if the mortal eye even looks at them w/o a shell covering the main body. tpot 9 has twos shell get even more damaged, revealing the truth body underneath. gaty peeped the horrors. gaty got a bad horrible terrible massive worst-of-her-life headache that night."
#i say alien numbers solely because i forgot how to properly spell what theyre actually called </3#tpot spoilers#tpot#tpot two#tpot gaty#tpot one#mspaint#ask 2 tag
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my hxh experience is also very confusing bc i started watching it like 2+ years ago at my partners apartment, but then i think we stopped for a bit / we moved around a bit, and kinda just never got back to it. then a while after we moved in with each other wayyyy later we eventually picked it back up and then this time in dub form bc it's easier for me to focus if i dont have to try and read everything quick enough and also see whats happening jfkldshg so it was like
sub version watched up through like halfway through york new auction arc or whatever
[2+ YEAR LONG GAP???]
picking right back up exactly in the midway spot where we left off, now in dub, i cannot remember Jack Shit and have to keep asking my partner [who has seen/read it before] what's going on and who everyone is every 5 seconds. there are so many characters and i remembered like 6 of them at best fdhjvlksjldhg. killua's grandpa and dad showed up like an episode or 2 after we picked it back up and i was like who are these guys. where did they come from. tbh being told who they were didnt help bc i still didnt understand why or how they were there dfshjfghjgf
#and then they did it again in chimera ant arc.... where did killuas dad come from since when was he in on the plan#AND WHERED THEY GO. I HAVENT SEEN THEM COME BACK SINCE THEN.... did they actually leave this time... i dont know#also dude i miss netero :[ we r like a couple episodes after the big mega heart attack explosion thing#i love a cool old man#i still struggle to remember peoples names bc god there are SO many characters#but chimera ant arc is so long that you at least spend a lot of time with them so theres some names ive eventually learned#but im still me so i cant tell you how many times i called meleoron 'lemeleon'#it's like pokemon with him i cant. remember it very clearly and i mix it up hardcore#other people i just cant remember at all so im like uhhh. ponytail guy <- which barely narrows it down they keep finding ponytail guys....#nobunaga.... shoot.... some other guy i think. actually maybe not that many idr LOL#dont even get me started on the spiders. it took me forever just to get nobunaga lol#there are soooo many of them and i had forgotten the first chunk we'd watched after the irl timeskip#so i was in realtime trying to recall who eveyrone was while they were doing shit and it was REALLY CONFUSING#i really need to restart from the beginning but im gonna wait til we finish the anime lol#oh also i like. completley forgot illumi or w/e was doing the hunter exam with hisoka in that first arc#bc literally theres like ONE or two brief moments in. idk if it was greed island or right before it#where hisokas like yeah i calld a friend. and illumis there like 🧍#and i was like he knows killuas brother??? theyre friends???#bc i just had no memory of them interacting before fdlkhgjkf#i like kinda forgot illumi existed til then i think jdkslf or maybe when he was haunting killua idr#actually we went back and watched part of an episode when killua was w/his family#bc i couldnt remember ANYTHING i was like. why was he there again. dont they suck or something. what happened.#and tbh. i still dont get what their vibe is hwhwhfhehg#things to revisit once i get out of the ant pit
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Oh my god one last thing my ex took me to outside lands and when we tried to watch lana del rey he laid down on the grass and had a “panic attack” (this was after months of him talking about how he didn’t like her) so we went to see foo fighters after a bit and he was FINE
#LANA i know his sister works for you BUT TRUST MY WORD AND GIVE ME A FREE TICKET PLEASE…#MY FIRST TIME SEEING YOU WAS RUINED GIRL… she was so good too like i was saving her songs to spotify that night#im reliving all this because i found out a lot of his exes and ex friends hang out together and two of them invited me so it was me an ex an#d an ex friend just swapping stories and first of all. he said he got cheated on by this girl and she NEVER DID IT (HE would have emotional/#angry outbursts at HER though) (allegedly he’s acknowledged to her that the cheating never happened too) and 2. this is obviously making me#mentally rehash everything again. i feel so bad for his current girlfriend and also for the person i ‘’stole’’ him from though i really hesi#tate to blame myself after hearing about his patterns. first of all he wouldve done this with anyone who was vulnerable around him and secon#d i was the only reason he was at all honest with them. he was fully planning to gaslight this ex and me and his dad had to convince him not#to. they look like theyre happy now and im very happy for them over that. oh my god that man was evil he told me for WEEKS about every time#his then partner had talked shit about me while i made clear that i didnt care and wasnt very interested but he kept going. god i cant belie#ve this was my life a year ago.#the one thing i can say is that i out freaked him because throughout our short relationship i made him so insecure that a week after i told#to never speak to me again he called me asking if he really was ugly.#I CANNOT BELIEVE I HAD TO TEND TO A GROWN MAN WHILE LANA DEL REY WAS RIGHT THERE BECAUSE HE WAS SO OPPOSED TO BEING AROUND HER. LANAAAA#times like these i get so mad i dont know what to do but ultimately remembering that he has not achieved any of his goals because he refuses#to face himself really helps me. god man IVE achieved some of his goals and i wasnt even trying to#a really awful part of all of this was all of the friends who knew him taking his side. because they didnt know him well enough to know what#he was actually like.#i was talking to my ex friend of four years and she was like not to blame you but he was probably really vulnerable from his time with [ex p#rior to me]’’ because he’s been going around alleging that that ex was abusive. and she was implying i took advantage of him. so i had to go#into detail about what an awful awful person he was and the sort of state i was in when this relationship took place. hannah lee you are#not seeing your little jehovah’s witness heaven.#anyways redirecting this energy im very happy with the way my life is and the way i am now. and im grateful for it i would not have ever bee#n able to imagine having the sort of peace and motivation i feel now. life feels like it can and will change for the better and it keeps pro#ving that right all the time#it just hurts sometimes having that as my first experience and not even being able to vocalize what was wrong bc i just didnt know hurts#oh i forgot one of his besties can see my account bc we’re sort of mutuals. i doubt he’s looking he did the whole unfollowing the ex bc she’#s allegedly amoral thing after the breakup but if he is hi isaac#he did on rare occasion show me selfless kindness but ultimately your best friend is a creep. i don’t want to be involved with anyone from#our school but I hope you know this and I hope you’re proud
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how many variations of "x reader" does a man have to blacklist and users to block before tumblr stops giving him almost exclusively those posts
#zymtalk#NO DISS TO PEOPLE WHO READ THOSE BUT#okay first of all. why am i getting posts for shows i dont even know in my feed. im trying to remember the main one i get but IDK#SO I FORGOT WHAT IT IS actually emphasizing my point#second of all THEYRE SO LONG AND THEY NEVER HAVE THE 'open full post' THING MEANING YOU SCROLL PAST THE ENTIRE THING BC THEY#ARENT CUT SHORT AND :ooohhhh:#THIRD of all I DONT INTERACT WITH THESE outside of blocking users who write them sorry :( not ur fault#unless u post weirdo pr0/sh!p ones. then it IS your fault get help or die#AND I ADD A NEW VARATION EVERY LIKE. 3 POSTS I GET meaning its 95% of my blacklisted phrases and tags#AND STILL NOTHING......#sucession. the show is called sucession#THATS LIKE THE MAIN ONE I GET WHY AUUGJUHUGHGGH#also SPECIFICALLY the BAYVERSE TMNT MOVIES? WHATS THAT ABOUT?#that one i understand the tmnt connection i guess???? but even then...... what are you doing here. get out of my house.#ITS THE ONLY TIME BLACKLISTING A TAG OR PHRASE HASNT WORKED EITHER [spongebob bwomp sound]
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feeling like im being driven to my execution (its a drs appointment)
#p#also thats a little dramatic but i do hate them so much#i was feelin like well ill be uncomfortable n miserable but its not the end of the world#buuuut then i remembered (TMI AHEAD U HAVE BEEN WARNED)#that last month ish when i was here for an actual concern (n agreed to this physical bleh)#i was told im overdue for another pap smear n like they cant force me into it ofc but i know its smart to do it#cuz i already have lots of anxieties abt what if i secretly have some disease or condition n im gonna die blah blah blahh#but last time it was so awful n i was like crying thru it cuz of the pain which. isnt normal#googling it afterwards i found ppl saying stuff like 'it might be weird n uncomfortable but not too bad'#so i was like well ok thats just me then i guess :/#n anyway i def think i have that condition called w/e cuz ive never been able to do any kind of like. anything in there#not like day to day its a huge deal but for this its not too fortunate :/#so long story short i remembered ill have to decide if ill let them do it again at this appt#n i was reading abt the process again n then uh oh crying -_-#omw now n idk what ill do tbh. def wanna say no but also idk i shld be responsible or smth#dies instead.#n anyway even if its just the super basic physical theyre gonna do ill still wanna become an incorporeal entity thing#hate it hereeeee (body)#its a PA im seeing who i remember being nice some other time i saw her so theres that at least#theyre gonna wanna weigh me tho i forgot that too jeez#i said no last time but idk. kms
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i’m sure u received asks about the mma 2022 performances - hoping i’m not adding too much noise ur inbox 🫡
but i feel a bit underwhelmed with these performances? i was sad to see the lineups for all of the upcoming award shows and how there aren’t a lot (or any) 2nd gen/3rd gen performers. granted there aren’t as many 2nd gen active kpop artists that are doing music (most ventured into acting but also hello! i want a key gasoline end of year stage!). and 3rd gen bgs are enlisting + ggs disbanded or not as mainstream.
i’ve seen a lot of praise for le sseafim’s stage but idk it wasn’t anything wow. it felt awkward to me?
i haven't actually, it seems like everyone (including me) forgot about it. i don't know what the full list of performers is so i probably haven't watched all of them, but yea almost no strong performances. what the hell is wrong with the creative directors for these groups, like did y'all forget how stage a good awards show performance in two years? the mmas gave like 11-12 minutes to all these trendy fourth gen groups and NONE of them could keep any semblence of my attention for more than maybe three minutes. the only two groups that actually understood the scale of what they were supposed to be doing were monsta x and ive, bc starship has been sending groups to awards shows for ages. and of that mx's was the only one that was actually interesting and in proper scale for the event, and they did it in less time than everyone else. and also gidle but like. was that a good performance? no, but at least they got the scale right.
tbh the main problem seems to me that all these groups are doing songs/vcrs etc that are just too sedate/slow for that large a stage and they aren't planned well. some groups are kinda sol in that regard (sorry newjeans, your music isnt gonna work on an awards show stage without revamping the production), but literally why were there vcrs in the middle of some of these performances. the one in the ive performance literally just covered up them WALKING TO A DIFFERENT PART OF THE STAGE. why. are you too good to sing a song and hype up the audience while you walk? i dont even want to talk about the txt performance it has some of the worst everything i've seen in a hot minute. the le sserafim stage had extremely poor understanding of how to actually use the stage properly and pathetic styling. like sorry diesel outfits do NOT cut it for an awards show performance. enhypen had legitimately horrible styling like what the actual fuck was that. a lot of these groups are treating these stages as extentions of their 'lore' or whatever and having these ponderous ~mysterious~ vcrs without actually realizing that that is not what these shows are for. these shows need BIG performances bc they are long and they have huge lulls in them thanks to the actual awards presenting. it's one of the only types of performance that it's not necessary to build a dynamic arc into because you do not need one.
#i actually forgot how much i liked rush hour its so fun#also if i see another person call what changkyun was wearing a corset im going to walk off a bridge are y'all stupid?#have none of you seen a corset before??#mx im gonna be so sad when you eventually go on hiatus bc ur literally holding everything up rn#GOD i miss nu'est so fucking BAD they were so good at awards show performances#also like.....where tf is highlight???? like theyre active they just had a really successful cb theyre an industry staple?#the lack of older gen groups here was really obvious like i hope they're going to show up at some other shows bc this is tragic#AND also the lack of sm groups too. i know its bc theyre all prepping for the winter concert but damn i could have used a real nct stage#(sorry atbo you tried and did admirably but you're still too baby)#also like....i know ateez said fuck all y'all and went on tour doing awards show season but lads i need you to come back you're our only ho#generally the song festivals have better lineups at least so maybe those will be better. fingers crossed#did everyone just have really long performance slots bc they didnt have a big enough performance lineup?#like 12 minutes is WAY too long these should be two songs maximum#mma 2022#awards shows 2022#text#answers#went and watched boa's inkigayo stage right after this and boy the difference
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Imma be real, if normal was my son we wouldnt be hanging with them people no more cus you not gon treat my son like shit and expect him to get over it
#dndads spoilers#normal oak swallows garcia#they treat my baby like shit its crazy#dndads s2#linc literally kicked scary out his house for killing tony and now she aint gotta apologize?#the switch up is crazy ngl#literally no hate to matt or anything i love the direction the characters are going but im telling you rn#linc aint shit. we been knew scary wasnt shit. taylor dont even know normal exists#hermie be calling him a backup plan like dont nobody want my boy 😤 😒#and i know theyre teens and all that like i get why they fighting but at the same time#as someone who is on the otherside of one of those types of relationships rn... linc is not being a good friend to normal#and i do really wanna see where this goes cus this has been seeded for like 30 episodes now its crazy how good this show is#like they all acting they asses off so that's never the issue#i just dont think linc has a concept of what being a good friends actually entails outside of taylor and scary#also the parents are super to blame as well cus they should have been stepped in#i know its because anthony literally forgot they were there but...#someone needs to go up for normal and its gon be me i guess
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sometimes the queer girl to crunchy girl pipeline is so scary so unfortunate
#came across keara graves on instagram reels#i watched her on youtube years ago like when she first came out as bi#or they. idk they use both pronouns. anyway#theyre going on about how the pandemic was actually a fear epidemic and therapy + self help books helped cure her of her health anxiety#what about the pandemic part? lmfao#she doesnt seem very how do you call it. smart#the ppl that died? they were just too stressed!#oof#we are gonna stop giving her views now lmaooo#personal#u know if they call themselves a mindset spirituality podcaster you run#but i wanted to see their wife#but at what cost (covid denialism)#dangerous bullshit!!!!!!!#just bc u didnt die doesnt mean others didnt i just oh fuck this djsjdjsjd#oh my god she says she knows how to manifest and everything happens for a reason#she is so not my type of person#i forgot why i unsubbed from her youtube channel years ago! apparently this was why! lmao fuck off
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Me watching my friend play OMORI:
When your friend starts getting into a series you already know
#theyre actually about to get to the whale#and when they get to the yume nikki area (forgot what the game was called) i AM watching it live#if they dont im gonna basil them /j
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