#i felt compelled to share it

[spookyllamatree]

I got accepted back into grad school to do my PhD!!!! I've literally been crying with happiness since I found out.

I feel like the horror of working a 9-5 (because honestly it is horror for me) is finally done 😭😭😭 there's light at the end of the tunnel. I've been working at my new job for less than two months and I'm already struggling really hard, and I feel like I can't let anyone know because I'm afraid they'll fire me if they think my mental illness is affecting my productivity (since that happened at my last job.....). Like it's gotten bad to the point where I've barely been able to be on tumblr, I haven't been able to read fanfic (!!!), when I do I'm struggling to leave comments. Everything feels too hard, even engaging with things I like and that calm me down.

I told my friend going back to school makes me feel like I get to go back to being myself and I realized it's because I mask way less at school. They can't fire me for being neurodivergent/mentally ill there, I can be myself 😭😭😭

I didn't even know I had this weight on my chest but it's lifted. I really didn't think I'd get in anywhere.

This is my second choice school, so I'll wait to see if my first choice accepts me, but I'm still so happy 😭😭

[theconchaverse]

argentinian football player miku by @Ag_TheMatambre on twitter

[pirateprincessjess]

When I was a child I was struggling at school, and I was unhappy, so my parents started taking me to a therapist. I ended up telling this therapist that I wanted to be a girl. I hadn’t heard the term transgender yet, but I knew I wasn’t a boy.

This therapist told me that it was a fetish. It was my first time hearing the word fetish. She told me that wanting to be a girl was something bad that I should be ashamed of. I was told not to tell my parents because they would be disgusted, and that if anyone found out it could ruin my life.

I held onto that shame for a decade until my senior year of high school when a transgender student started going to my school. I never met her, but I saw her around, and heard people talk about her. This was a transwoman living her life openly and publicly. She was doing the very thing that I was told would ruin my life, but her life didn’t seem ruined. She had friends, and seemed happy. Happier than me.

A year later in October 2013 DC comics published Batgirl #19 by Gail Simone. In this issue Batgirl’s roommate Alysia Yeoh came out to batgirl as a transwoman. Batgirl was so loving and accepting in that moment. My favorite superhero didn’t see anything wrong with being transgender. I sat at my computer reading peoples reactions and reviews to this comic for hours. I sent the author an anonymous message on tumblr thanking her for helping me find the strength to love myself.

I still had a long way to go before I was able to come out, but these things helped me start to heal. This is why visibility and representation are so important. Seeing another trans person in real life, and seeing trans people in the media I was consuming helped me be less afraid, and helped me hate myself less. In october 2019 I started HRT at 25 years old. Nearly 5 years later I’m happier than ever, and I love life.

[ruushes]

was going through old art and remembered i had a phase of trying to paint my weird dreams, this one kind of rules actually?

[flixleoz]

watched this adaptation weeks ago and i still can’t draw them properly so i've resorted to drawing them very poorly instead

[southernbutchblues]

[gotta-big-ego]

Mark's Only Fans, but it's just Mark dressing up as his egos and does random domestic household things i.e. Dark cooking dinner, Wilford doing laundry, The Host reading a book

[trentskis]

[sarabethsilver]

GIF by literatigifs

Obsessed with the way Jess licks his lips after saying this.

[blluespirit]

TL;DR: Zuko is not winning any Liar of the Year awards here, but he's by not a ‘bad liar’ either. He's also (apparently surprisingly) not sharing his every deep-seated thought and feeling to anyone and everyone and can in fact, keep a secret.

a canon vs fanon Zuko thing thing I see fairly often that I personally disagree with is that Zuko is constantly over-sharing and telling people too much about himself and his problems.

People love to use the Book 1 finale incident when he talks to Aang's unconscious body in the cave, but that feels like a bizarre example because... he's more talking to himself. He's not really talking to Aang. Aang can't hear him. Aang is literally none the wiser. It's not an inappropriate time or person or unreciprocated, and honestly the whole thing is more for the audience to get a sense of what in gods green earth is going through Zuko's mind considering how reckless this action was. And even if Aang was awake I still don't know if you could call it oversharing considering Aang has genuinely tried to reach out to Zuko before and tried to understand him (e.g., the Blue Spirit). Of all people, Aang would likely be the most receptive. Like... net zero information gained...

I've seen people use some examples with Iroh which I personally think is pretty ridiculous to count because it's not like he's saying anything Iroh doesn't already know??? Iroh is like the only one in Zuko's orbit who actually knew all the details about his banishment and trauma. I don't know how any scene Zuko could have with Iroh that you could call over-sharing. Zuko also never said shit to his crew about any of his past for like. two whole years. The most they thought of him was angry and spoiled. They didn't actually know anything about him. like... at all. Jee thought his scar was from a training accident.

People like to also use the scene on the ship with Mai in Book 3 when Zuko is returning to the Fire Nation, but even that feels like a bit of a stretch. Yeah, Mai dismisses him and tries to play it off, but nothing Zuko says feels 'too personal' especially when Mai is supposed to be his girlfriend and Zuko has literally not been home in three years. Telling your girlfriend/someone you trust how you feel in a obviously emotionally turbulent situation is not sharing too much, no matter their reaction or whether they asked first.

MAI: Aren't you cold? ZUKO: I've got a lot on my mind. It's been so long, over three years since I was home. I wonder what's changed. I wonder how I've changed. MAI: [Yawns.] I just asked if you were cold, I didn't ask for your whole life story. [Zuko frowns at her sarcastic response. Mai giggles and holds his face in her hands.] MAI: Stop worrying.

Another example I see is when Zuko rants to the badgerfrog. Again, not really an example since the badgerfrog is not a person and the story needed Zuko to Say Things Out Loud so we have some clue about what he's thinking. It's the same thing with the unconscious Aang. It's not oversharing. It's venting. And once again - net zero information achieved!!

Like, none of these instances feel like he's revealed too much information. None of it feels inappropriate in the context of the story.

I think people get 'over-sharer' and 'openly wearing your emotions' lines confused sometimes, but even that gets misconstrued in fandom.

I don't think that Zuko being more open with his emotions than other characters is an incorrect conclusion to make, however, I think there's something to be said about Zuko in book 1 and 2 using anger and rage as a coping mechanism rather than being vulnerable with his emotions.

Zuko will talk about his feelings a lot more in Book 3, which is actually super important to his arc, since he doesn't actually talk about his feelings in a real way in Book 1 and 2 (he's angry most of the time, and the only times I can remember when he does really talk about how he actually feels is usually when things have gotten Real Bad like when Zhao takes his ship or it's the anniversary of his banishment). In Book 3, he's really thinking and reflecting on how he feels and how he felt in different situations.

Even the 'Zuko is a bad liar' gets WAY over-played in fanon!

Yeah Zuko is not great at thinking on his feet when confronted, but it seems very context dependent, actually.

When in dangerous situations, while he's definitely not winning any Best Liar Ever Awards, he's not a bumbling fool either -

Zuko lies to Zhao about the Blue Spirit swords:

ZHAO: I didn't know you were skilled with broadswords, Prince Zuko. ZUKO: I'm not. They're antiques. Just decorative.

While not ultimately convincing, his delivery of it is far from terrible. The circumstances are against him here, though, after all, there are few people who hate Zhao enough to commit treason to stop him from capturing the Avatar than Zuko.

Zuko lies to Zhao about having found the Avatar:

ZHAO: [Pulls up alongside Zuko and smirks.] Two years at sea have done little to temper your tongue. So, how is your search for the Avatar going? ZUKO: [Aggressively.] We haven't found him yet. ZHAO: Did you really expect to? The Avatar died a hundred years ago. [Close-up of Zuko, as he slants his eyes.] Along with the rest of the airbenders. [Close-up of Zhao, whose face contorts in an evil expression.] Unless you have found some evidence that the Avatar is alive? ZUKO: [Faces Zhao and responds very clearly.] No. [Stares back in front of him.] Nothing. ZHAO: [With an expression of disbelief on his face, as he rises from his chair.] Prince Zuko, the Avatar is the only one who can stop the Fire Nation from winning this war. [Leans in and faces Zuko.] If you have an ounce of loyalty left, you'll tell me what you found. ZUKO: I haven't found [Looks up at Zhao and his tone becomes slightly more aggressive.] anything. [Close-up, as he continues on a softer tone, slightly mockingly.] It's like you said. The Avatar probably died a long time ago. [Gets up.] Come on, Uncle, we're going.

I'm not trying to say Zuko is secretly this great liar, but his effort here is commendable. It's his directness that gives him away, but he's not afraid, or nervous, or stumbling over his words like he's often portrayed to be.

Zuko confidently lies to Jet about not being a firebender:

[while on the ferry; you can see Zuko thinks for a second Jet knows who he really is. Jet doesn't pick up on this, and Zuko plays off his fear].

JET: You know, as soon as I saw your scar, I knew exactly who you were. You're an outcast, like me. And us outcasts have to stick together. We have to watch each other's backs. Because no one else will. ZUKO: I've realized lately that being on your own isn't always the best path.

[during Zuko and Jet's fight]

JET: Bet you wish he'd help you out with a little fire blast right now. [As Jet swings at Zuko's feet, Zuko stabs one of his broadswords through the hilt, pinning it to the ground. Jet looks at it with annoyance before focusing back on Zuko.] ZUKO: You're the one who needs help.

Zuko, throughout these interactions, plays off Jet's comments. He's learnt to be vague sometimes (like on the ferry to Ba Sing Se) and be confident when refuting someone. Yeah Zuko did go straight for Bodily Harm but that's very on brand to me.

Zuko lies to Chit Sang about the escape plan without hesitation:

SUKI: But how are you going to get the cooler out? CHIT SANG: [From the staircase.] Yeah, how are you going to get the cooler out? [Jumps down.] SOKKA: [Covering up.] What? We didn't ... w-we didn't say that. ZUKO: Yeah, you heard wrong. CHIT SANG: I heard you hatching an escape plan, and I want in. ZUKO: [stern] There's nothing to get in on. SOKKA: Yeah, the only thing we're hatching is ... an egg? [Zuko lowers his head and Suki covers her eyes while they both sigh in annoyance.]

Zuko comes up with a lie to tell the guards at the Boiling Rock about keeping his helmet on:

MALE GUARD: Hey, new guy! I know it's the rule to have your helmet on at all times, but this is the lounge. Relax. ZUKO: [plays it up] But what if there's an incident? If I'm not prepared, someone could strike me on the head. [The guards laugh.] FEMALE GUARD: Give it a week, he'll loosen up.

However, Zuko most often has the most difficulty lying to people who are kind to him (and who are Azula tbh) -

In Crossroads of Destiny, Zuko and Iroh are now refugees and Zuko bungles this conversation with Song:

ZUKO: [Nervously] Yes, we're travellers. SONG: you have names? ZUKO: Names? Of course we have names. I'm, uh ... Lee and this is my Uncle, uh ... Mushi?

In Tales of Ba Sing Se, Zuko struggles to find even ground with Jin and doesn't know how to answer her questions:

ZUKO: You have ... quite an appetite for a girl. [He fiddles his thumbs awkwardly.] JIN: [Uncomfortably.] Umm ... thanks? So, Lee, where were you and your uncle living before you came here? ZUKO: Umm ... well, we've been traveling around for a long time. JIN: Oh. Why were you traveling so much? ZUKO: We were ... uh, part of this traveling circus. JIN: Really? What did you do? Wait, lemme guess. [She thinks for a moment and quickly points at him.] You juggled! ZUKO: [Zuko folds his arms and looks annoyed.] Yes, I juggled.

In Zuko Alone, he's at a loss for words when asked his name:

SELA: Does this guy have a name? ZUKO: [Nervously.] I'm... uh... GANSU: [Off-camera.] He doesn't have to say who he is if he doesn't want to, Sela. [Cuts to shot of him standing with his family.] Anyone who can hold his own against those bully soldiers is welcome here. Those men should be ashamed to wear Earth Kingdom uniforms.

Listen, he's not weaving any incredible tales here, but he's not this bumbling little uwu boy who's completely helpless without Iroh or the Gaang that for some reason is incredibly persistent in fan depictions of him.

[jeanmoreaue]

okay sharing how i picture aftg characters below bc I feel like it lol

Neil Josten - i am most unsure about how i picture him lmao but this little boy from the lord of the flies movie has young Neil vibes + this dude in an outfit Neil would not wear on the right has Neil vibes as well

also I've said this before but tennis us open winner Jannik Sinner serves Neil Josten

Kevin is who i have the most definite idea of bc he’s easy to find pinterest references for bc all pinterest references are gonna be unrealistically hot and with Kevin that works perfectly so here’s that hot hockey player everyone thirsts after Michal Mrazik

and then I also am convinced that Shohei Ohtani serves Kevin Day vibes (record-breaking baseball player/arguably top player of all time, hot, he even had a career changing arm injury and made a massive comeback + had a very public drama with his "lifelong best friend" who stole a ton of his money lol sorry Shohei) and bonus: Shohei Ohtani with his equally talented basketball player wife Mamiko Tanaka (Thea)

for Jeremy this random dude from a Yale ad is a little too hot, but very close to how i picture Jeremy but yes also i’ve been convinced by everyone’s Damon Albarn idea lmao

i can’t find one person in particular who looks like Jean, but here is a "actors who if all combined would probably look like Jean to me" moodboard:

[valentineshearts]

My grandfather is a big Sci-Fi fan (and probably autistic tbh), so hanging out with him as a child often involved watching tv shows that I had NO BUSINESS watching at such a young age as we sat in silence. Once I got older, I obviously had no idea what any of these shows were called and it has taken me until now, roughly 15 years later to finally figure out what they are, so here is my list of the highlights:

The absolute nightmare hell with the whole world standing in silence in a line with the guy who gets his hand cut off: The first episode of David Tennant as the Tenth Doctor (this shit literally haunted me for years, I think I watched it when I was like five)

The cute doctor from Star Trek but I don’t know which Star Trek: Julian Bashir, Deep Space Nine

The most beautiful woman to ever exist that I’m in love with who has like leopard spots: Jadzia Dax

[drinkinggblood]

Frogs

[neixins]

hm. i apparently have an unpopular opinion about yona’s decision during her conversation with hiryuu…… like. obviously she’s motivated by the desire to save her friends—she loves them and cares about them deeply and is scared of losing them—and there’s some selfishness in that (on a more facetious note though, god forbid teenage girls do anything i guess…). but the interpretation of her decision as selfish to the point of cruelty and/or naïveté just doesn’t sit right with me. like there is no solution to the conundrum she was presented with that doesn’t involve tragedy. and i’m never, ever letting anyone forget that jaeha, gija, and sinha were never given a choice regarding zeno’s whole murder-suicide plan, and they don’t regret being alive, so wouldn’t changing the past and effectively erasing them from existence (when they already have no agency atm!!!!) be so much more cruel? wouldn’t discarding two millennia worth of lives, regardless of how painful they’d been, be so much more cruel? does a life lived not matter because there was suffering?

and yona values life, even when it hurts, so she was never gonna make a different choice, and i just don't think that that's extremely selfish or naïve of her; the dragon warriors are not just vessels for the gods, they're people, and they don't deserve to be erased because the gods don't care about the pain they cause, and she can't confront the gods in the dream realm, she has to do it in her present which can't exist if she changes it! (also on a purely narrative level, any other choice would've basically rendered 40+ volumes of the story pointless.) and besides, it's more interesting to focus on trying to make things better rather than rewriting the past, and she'll have to sacrifice something to save everyone (the part of her that's a reincarnation of hiryuu, obviously, and possibly something more) which will even things out anyway.

[justghoulythingz]

“Y’make a habit ‘a sittin’ on old fellas’ laps, huh? Or maybe them youngins are jus’ too polite t’put you in your place.” Warm breath caresses your ear, breezing through your hair. “There’s a nice spot on the floor in front ‘a me. ‘S got a couple l’il dents that match the knobs ‘a your knees.” Forcefully, he bounces one leg, and you have no choice but to bounce with it. Hmmm.

“What are you waitin’ for, dumplin’? Permission?”

[todayisafridaynight]