#i feel too awful to focus

[bringiton]

🎄 25 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS → DAY FIVE 🎄 EDWARD SCISSORHANDS (1990), dir. Tim Burton "I'm not finished."

[musical-dash-trash]

i’m so in love with this world and everything in it

[cookinguptales]

Do me a favor, okay? Next time you have a chance, close your eyes for a minute and take a deep breath and imagine someone loving you.

Imagine someone who gets excited just thinking about you. Imagine someone who loves the things you say and do and who genuinely enjoys spending time with you. Imagine someone who feels lucky every moment they get to be around you.

It can be a real person or someone you just made up. You can imagine them praising you or laughing with you or touching you or whatever love means to you. It can be romantic or otherwise. Take your pick.

And if you had a hard time doing it?

Do it again. And again. And again.

I read once that it’s important for us to visualize being loved. That your brain needs to be trained like a muscle, and like a muscle, it can become weak from disuse. Your brain can only do the things that you practice doing, and if you never, ever visualize someone loving you, it becomes difficult to even imagine someone loving you. You get stuck in a rut. And once it’s impossible to imagine someone loving you, it becomes impossible to believe you will ever be loved.

I think… sometimes it can become easy to stop believing that we’re worthy of love. And I think sometimes we have this fantasy of someone making us believe that we’re worthy of it again. Or that somehow we’ll just — earn it, one day. Being worthy of love and desire, respect and affection.

But I think the truth is that we can only start believing that we’re worthy of love if we’re capable of imagining it. And it becomes much, much easier to imagine it if you practice doing so.

It may feel awkward at first. Embarrassing. Silly. Maybe even painful. But think about it like this, maybe: your first day in a dance class, you’ll fall. You’ll look ridiculous. It’ll feel like your body will never be able to do this fluidly. But by the end of the class, you’ll be able to move in a whole new way. Maybe not perfectly, but… better, y’know?

Learn to waltz with your own mind, and try not to cringe too hard at your first awkward movements. Start small and work your way up if you have to. Someone liking you, then someone liking your conversations, then someone liking your presence, then someone purposefully seeking you out. Someone putting time aside for you. Someone thinking about you when you’re not there. Someone being with you because there’s nowhere they’d rather be.

It may feel self-indulgent, but… I mean, we all deserve to be indulged sometimes. And we all deserve to feel worthy of love.

So… indulge yourself. Take a moment and have a silly little fantasy. Get into the habit of imagining love, and imagining it for the you that exists right now, not the you that you wish you were.

Learn to speak the language of love as it applies to you, even if you think that it doesn’t, and one day you’ll realize how to use those syllables to say your own name.

It’ll come one day. In the meantime, let’s learn to dance together, okay?

[weezerlvr228]

hi fam !!

[flygonscales]

2 weeks at uni and I’ve already reached peak procrastination. I found masking tape and somehow decided that the best use of my time was to make a tiny Belphemon-sleep.

[hunsa-jars]

Dread be dreading

[tariah23]

[theinsterminators]

"surely this will remedy itself on its own," i say, ignoring a problem of my own doing

[no1ryomafan]

I hate how my Kikaider brain rot has actually worsened since watching the sequels because I thought it would put it at bay since it’s been putting me off from doing other stuff but I just keep ROTATING all the stuff about 01 funnily enough.

01 is just so *weird* because it’s not like I’m having a relationship where I hate it and I think it ruined the original but then become obsessed with wanting to fix it-I have had rewrite ideas but it would come with their own problems nor are they really striking me-no, I don’t actually feel super negative towards it, even if it’s objectively so flawed for multilayered reasons but I keep hyperfixating on WHY it’s so flawed because the OG show and even the crossover are not nearly as flawed in comparison. They do have their issues but they serve their purpose.

The original show having a recap ep was a odd decision and unfortunately the ending feels rushed/unsatisfying due to they had to make a up a ending since they couldn’t do 01s yet, but also as a self contained story it’s still incredibly solid and works for 12/13 episodes. Where as crossover despite being a single episode works for its runtime since it ties perfectly back to both the OG show and 01 + gives Jiro a ending that’s the closest thing to closure he’ll ever get, it’s biggest flaw is just the Inazuman characters are something you won’t have full context on if you don’t read the manga because they sadly didn’t get a anime-which yes I am also reading the manga, didn’t get far but I like what I have read-but that also does not actually effect the Kikaider side of the crossover.

But then you have 01 which absolutely FAILS at using the 4 episodes it’s given in almost every way: It doesn’t tie back to the original despite the originals ending being the way it was for 01, with plot holes being caused from it and it’s tonally different as it leans more on action than story which is not in its favor as it takes up most of its short runtime leading to the new characters and the story not being as developed as the original despite having incredibly interesting plot points, just the execution is not there.

It’s the one Kikaider show that needed to be longer, either the episodes needed a 45 minute runtime or it needed to be 6-7 episodes which is at least half the length of the original if it also couldn’t get the 12/13 episodes treatment. It just baffles me how 01 was given such little time especially as a OVA yet was still made likely due to the first show doing decently, yet they didn’t use their time wisely at all to make it actually tie to the original.

But I still can’t find myself to actually hate it or deem it as bad because maybe I appreciate the fact it existed just so the crossover could happen and we could also see the 01 characters animated, or just again, it doesn’t ruin the original so you could honestly pretend it doesn’t exist even if I don’t because I like the crossover and it’s important there. It’s something I don’t feel strongly for and I will always just advise the first show to people, since it being so flawed for so many reasons that’s it’s baffling at least makes it interesting to think about rather than boring or god awful.

[adore-gregor]

Lol I keep on doing this, saying I'd come back to tumblr to only disappear again 😂😭

[circle-around-again]

"TD-D9 hobbled back into the chamber carrying a tray that held plates covered by domed lids. The droid set the covered plates before the seated figures, then said, 'Are you finished with me, Master Sidious?' 'Most definitely,' Sidious said. Keeping his eyes on Maul, Sidious waved at the droid. TD-D9 lifted off the floor, flew across the chamber, and smashed into the wall." (Windham, 70).

And so Sidious looks directly into Maul's eyes as he kills his proto-mother.

I'd like to talk about the class + gender dynamics of this little scene.

Deenine is obviously a British aristocratic servant, if we use the domed lid as a reference. She has served as Sidious' butler throughout the text, with the expected stoicism of the role having morphed into actual faceless steel.

What is interesting here is that she naturally doubles as another role; a mother. She controls the domestic space of this fortress while Sidious goes abroad. She raises and tyrannises Maul, but they must both bow to the patriarch.

Like the stay-at-home-mum and the Victorian nanny, she is dismissed once the little bird flies the nest. All power she once held evaporates.

[vamptastic]

got sidetracked on a tangent in class and this girl decided the best way to deal with it was to deliver a long rant about how everybody needs a chance to talk instead of like. Actually saying something to me directly. Which the professor then told her not to do again. And then told us to talk to each other after class where, to be very uncharitable, it became clear she thinks I am literally the dumbest person alive and have no idea that other people may find me annoying or that I may have a hard time with group discussion. To be more charitable apparently people in the back were talking shit about me for arguing in class a lot, and she was apparently also annoyed at them and trying to talk to me on their behalf. Just sort of baffled as to why a public lecture seemed the best way to do that, especially if it's apparently been happening for multiple classes. Idk man, do not appreciate being made a spectacle of nor do I understand why she would think I'm like, totally unaware of how I come off and need to have it explained to me like a 12 year old. Does it ever occur to people that maybe I'm annoying accidentally and not because I don't understand that being annoying is bad or what being annoying looks like.

[ask-artsy-oncie]

I wish I was not an unintelligent manchild.

[running-in-the-dark]

well. apparently I did something bad yesterday because I woke up with very very very bad pain in my shoulder/arm/upper back. I guess it's sore muscles but I don't know from what. 🙃

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[tasmanianstripes]

People need to practice minding their own damn business

Don't come into people's inboxes giving unsolicited advice or criticizing their personal stuff. Don't reblog somebody's posts saying how much you hate it and their opinions.

Don't like somebody's characterisation, AUs or the kind of art they post? It might even annoy you?

Okay, cool. Go make your own post. Block them. Be a little hater about it to your friends. It's good for your soul!

But don't be goddamn rude to people. Don't make it their problem.

"I don't like what this artist likes mah mah mah"

Here's a wild idea;

Artists...don't need to cater to you. You are not entitles to their work. Nobody on the internet should coddle you and post only stuff you like.

Shocker, I know.