#i feel so hopeless lmao | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mercymaker · 2 years ago

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this || close to just straight up screaming into a pillow

#life #fml #two out of 3 people cancelled on a shoot and i can't find a replacement because no one wants to collab with me even FOR FREE #i feel so hopeless lmao #i even decided to travel across the country just for the shoot #which is gonna cost me ~60 bucks #when i have no money to begin with #i'm gonna rip my hair out i s2g

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lupucs · 7 months ago

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Grrr-friend 🦖

#doodle #comic #Deltarune #noelle holiday #susie deltarune #kris dreemurr #not 3d #2D #grrr-friend #fanart #my art #SUSelle #hey look a rare comic from a while ago hope yall enjoy this different art style and medium haha #noelle is a hopeless roar-mantic #this is so dumb lmao #i wanted to colorize this but it ended up looking lame so i left it as it is #feel free to do whatever with it 😊

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sk-yay-sk · 12 days ago

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I don't like any of the maps I've seen for HTTYD so i'm playing a puzzle game w all the locations. This is the 3rd version so far

#httyd #how to train your dragon #httyd map #rtte #race to the edge #mm i already see things i wanna change lmao #the red circle is the are where the Red Death has control #not every dragon in there is under her control but all the dragons of her flock stay there so it's the area where dragon raids happen #i don't believe in the 3rd movie so there's no hidden world but if there WAS i'd put it there hence the ()#also i saw someone saying how funny itd be if hiccup's sarcastic narration of the 1st movie's opening scene was actually the names of place #hence ''freezing to death'' ''hopeless'' and especially ''the meridian of misery''#idk how i feel abt the bewilderbeast under berserker island so instead they're barely located in the red death's territory hence the lack o #raids #and since they're not in war w the dragons n don't get raided they have more people and can actually afford resources and time to things #like fighting other ppl and pillaging like actual vikings #the upper square is the map that berk&berserkers&freezing to death etc use #they're all p concerned w the dragon raids so there's not much energy put to exploring or interacting w Other ppl #n traders rarely go there #they're the weirdos who've settled too close to a dragon nest in the north #n the lower square is the map viggo has and where his Dragon Hunters mainly operate #im thinking of shifting that more to the right to put the rookery where the 'northern markets' currently are #also something that bothers me is that we never rly explore any normal villages #like we've got berk&the berserkers. then we've got uhh 2 dragon-friendly islands the dragon hunters and drago #like who is buying all that dragon product? who are the tribes of the other chieftains in the meeting drago burned down?#where is everyone???

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spaghett-onaplate · 5 months ago

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depression is really weird actually wdym i spent 2.5 years of my life in bed

#and wdym that lifestyle changed so quickly into being out and about and an active member of the world??#very proud of myself #and i mean it wasn't that quick of a change #it was like 1.5 years primarily depression bedrotting with occasional school -> primarily depression bedrotting ->#primarily depression bedrotting with 3-9 hours of work weekly -> straight into 31+ hours school+9-12 hours work weekly #so there was somewhat of a gradual progression #but still #also wowza i wake up 7-7:30am every morning now. 1pm was an early wake up for a not so insignificant amount of time #i mean of all fundamental growth years to miss out on the ages like what 12/13-15 aren't too bad? they would suck in a different way if i #had been socially involved #anyway it's just. yea i'm proud of myself but it is a crazy lifestyle change #and even when i was deeply depressed in a horrible routine i feel like i learned a lot. how to regulate my emotions and cope well and find #the joy in everything. bc if i stayed in bed all day then i would at least be happy about the sun or whatever #and for the while of being not at school at all i WANTED to be at school i just could not find one bc our school system is so cute like tha #(basically every school is at capacity and the local school that has a guaranteed place for me would have been an all boys or girls 😭)#but i miraculously found and got into this school and miraculously made it work so well for me socially and now academically #it's also a good time to get back into school for my education bc any later and it woulda been pretty bad for all my certifications and uni #ive missed out on so much maths that its not worth it to me to try and catch up but my teacher knows that #but ive always hated maths regardless i only ever understood it for the first half of yr 7 then my attendance dropped #and after my recent exam i decided to try harder at school. but i still got an A on the exam i didn't study for!! academic weapon fr #i'm just idk thinking back to myself in the past few years #and how hopeless it all felt. but i got out of it!! i beat the depression and social anxiety and found a good place and made the most of it #and during the peak of my depression i remember i went out someplace near my old school and panicked so so badly about seeing #kids from my old school. and the friends at the time didnt really check on me when i went to shake and cry in a side street lmao #i kept the best of that friendgroup and have better friends now. but anyway now i take a bus each morning with some kids from my old school #and you see these hands? they look like they're shaking to you?#anyway yeah it's just cool i got to this point :) i really had no hope for so long but now i have a life i'm living and a future i'm build #--ing towards #which is funny i just decided some random day last november after watching some better call saul 'huh actually lawyer would b pretty cool'#and will i get there? we'll see but i do have hope now

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faunandfloraas · 6 months ago

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i do still periodically remember that post on twt that had far too many likes talking about how fnf is def a song about romance, chan was lying for pretending it was about australia and i still start squinting into space because how fucking stupid could all 500 of you be

#like its so irrationally silly on my part but it annoyed me so much lmao #like firstly HOW are you interpreting these lyrics as being about romantic love like what ???#but also.... fauna and flora really was devastated here by the 2020 fires. 1 billion lost.#billion with a b!! gone forever!! burnt to a cinder. the environment was devastated #and you think felix and christopher who were literally stuck in korea unable to come home bc of covid for 3 yrs....#wouldnt have feelings about that?? like idk man the obsession with everything having to be romance really rots peoples brains #bc the 2020 bushfires started october 2019 and went for like 6 months i.e i had already been wearing a face mask before covid had taken ove #bc of the smoke. For months! like i cant imagine how hopeless they felt not being able to come back just seeing footage of blood red skies #but yeah its a song about a break up you dumb BITCH #okay thats my insane friday night rant done peace and love #peace and love 🤏

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wizardsix · 1 year ago

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the greeks are claiming gale as one of their own . have you Seen him?? his last name?? that man is greek im being so serious

#loves his mom.. knows how to cook... everything about him is thematically about water.. fatherless..#loves the pursuit of knowledge and magic more than anything.. hopeless romantic.. must i go on...#the fatherless thing was a joke but also not. i haven't met a single greek person w a stable relationship w their family #that man is GREEK #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 spoilers #baldur's gate 3 spoilers #gale dekarios #six speaks #im not really a headcanon guy unless i really feel it. and i really feel this one so its incredibly important to me #also bc good greek characters are incredibly lacking in media i guess i have to project and make my own #also yes i am fully greek im allowed to do this lmao

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werebutch · 1 month ago

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Dude I need to be someone else

#sucks to say but I genuinely cannot envision myself getting into another relationship no matter how bad I want one -__-#everyone even the gays here are so normal and I’m so not . and I’m also completely undesirable. WHAT IS THE POINTTTTT #I keep sabotaging my own life by avoiding everything ever but the only thing worse than that is actually doing things #doing things makes me feel even worse like I’m sooo broken beyond repair . and the worst is that at least as a teenager I could count on #someone kinda just latching onto me. how I made all my friends. but obviously adults don’t and SHOULDNT HAVE TO do that. but still sucks fo #me 😭 I feel unfixable I’m too socially inept to exist #the only way to get out of this is by making myself uncomfortable over and over but god I feel like I need divine intervention before I #actually get anywhere. guys I’m hopeless 🤦#being desired on the internet DOES NOT COUNT you guys don’t know me like that. don’t even start .. LMAO

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rakkuntoast · 11 months ago

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i swear if qforever doesnt get a nice and healing reunion with richas and tallulah i am exploding that server myself

#txt post #cw caps #a shit ton of caps in the tags #HOW HARD IS IT TO WISH THIS CUBITO SOME FUCKING HAPPINESS #EVERY TIME I REMEMBER ABT FOREVER CUBITO I FEEL AWFUL MY LITTLE GUY HASNT HAD A BREAK IN SO LONG #MOSTLY CUZ PEOPLE CONSTANTLY GIVE HIM SHIT AND ISOLATE HIM SINCE HE'S THE FUCKING PRESIDENT NOW AND DONT EVEN TREAT HIM AS MUCH OF A FRIEND #ANYMORE AND JUST HOLD HIM AT ARMS REACH. HE FEELS ALONE AND HOPELESS #LITERALLY THE ONLY PEOPLE THAT STILL TREAT HIM LIKE THEY TREATED HIM BEFORE THE WHOLE PRESIDENT THING BULLSHIT IS HIS DAMN FAMILY AND PHIL #AND MAYBE BAGHS TOO I CANT REMEMBER #man feels like no one trusts him anymore cuz hes “part of the feds” when he's not actually as involved as people make it seem #literally the only official mission he has ever done for the feds was the whole go to the nether get lost lmao L bozo #his position in the federation can literally just be reduced to the one who represents the islanders as a whole in the eyes of the feds #like god every time someone refers to him by his actually name instead of “the president” an angel regains its wings #cuz yeah he has to carry the burden of his position but that doesnt mean im not allowed to complain that everyone is pushing him away for i #like fuck. phil telling him that he trusts him and cares about him before forever went to the nether meant the fucking world to him #“phil nailed it down in the minute what was happening. im glad i can rely on him” <- not verbatim but like. cmon

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blurred-cat · 9 days ago

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idk if i've posted about this already but i just got a new psychologist and she's already off to a shit start with diagnosing me

"adjustment disorder" has a conflicting differential diagnosis with PTSD. it can't be both. yet she's giving me the former "to start" and has already steamrolled past my mentions that i might have a couple other undiagnosed conditions that should GREATLY inform any treatments moving forward if I have them.

but go off i guess.

i'm gonna hope things improve moving forward but i dunno. that weird feeling is creeping up on me again.

that very rural southern "TO HELL WITH IT" feeling....

#blurred-cat vs therapy #the countdown is at 6....#until i decide to swap docs #or just stop going #because at this point i feel like...#idk if hopeless is the right word...#more like fucking FRUSTRATED lmao #so frustrated I'd stop going because i'm tired of this shit

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adhderall · 20 days ago

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I see so many kids paying (with daddy's money ofc lmao) to go to art school just bc they Can even though their art sucks ass and they never put in the work to improve either. and then they get jobs through connections there lmfao. and yeah it makes me fucking BITTER .

"Oh you can just do it as a hobby" bruh after work I don't have the energy for fucking shit. much less creative endeavors. instead I get to miserably slave away doing whatever shitty job I can manage.

everyone expects me to be full of life and energy just because I'm young..... my body and mind are defective as fuck and it's only going to get worse over time. I can hardly function and I'm stressed out just from being alive.

#i feel so fucking hopeless and directionless #like i really have no fucking future and no power to do ANYTHING about it.#and it doesnt help that my mother rubs in how much of a failure i am and how much better and more functional all of my other peers are. Lmao #being alive is pain .

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1punch · 5 months ago

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" Now that I think about it... I have the sensation I never had that happening. Could say I never paid it any mind either. It's not like I don't especially like it, not a complex either. However, is it really ok? No... can't be ok. Can't help but think it's something I lost in the daily battles towards becoming a hero. Am I supposed to have this issue more in mind? Come to think of it, I didn't really have time to unpack it... if it was a normal guy then... "

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" That’s not the point... I have the feeling that things like a heart to heart interaction, sharing an umbrella, warmth, are all things broken away in my life. Other people can have things like big events and circumstances happening, romances and such bringing happiness in their daily lives. I have the feeling something broke, and that sweet-like fluffy, nice stuff just fell right off from me. That's what I meant. "

#HOPELESS ROMANTIC ALERT IM LOSING MY MIND ⚠️⚠️⚠️#NO I CANT DO THIS forst off he's YAPPING oh my GOD he really cant stfu when getting a chance to talk abt his feelings and oh. he's SO #CONFUSED LMAO #Saitama is barely ever in touch w/ himself & his desires and it's always a bunch of questions marks when actually trying to understand #- what he exactly feels lacking abd at what point and why #but every time it's just something is Deeply Wrong w/ me and /idk what is it/#HE MAKES ME UPSET IM GONNA KILL HIM HE HAS TO DIE.#I cant believe i only found this audio rn. it's so good im gonna bite someone #“ Saitama isn't interested in romance ” THIS “Saitama doesn't want a partner ” THAT ooooh shut up!!!!!!!!!#he's just a simple guy trying to look for social interconnections while being Very Depressed and BIOLOGICAL BROKEN #it's not about what he doesn't want it's about what he wants and believes HE'S NOT CAPABLE OF HAVING #PUNCHES THE WALL PUNCHES THE WALL!!!!!#⋆ ★ 【サイタマ】 : ̗̀➛ study.#( ps. Saitama reads shoujo & appreciates a good romance in action movies. dont be mean to the romantic in him. )

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du-hjarta-skulblaka · 7 months ago

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So yeah avoiding my phone didn't work and also meant I sat on the kitchen floor staring into space for about 3 hours before Alfie woke up but hey at least I didn't break anything

Them being around is helping a little but they're also struggling and it fuckin sucks bc I know we're both just. Rotating money stress in our minds

#like. i went out earlier to get bread #just bread bc we cant afford anything else #got just enough in the bank to cover the work thing but since management stjll hasnt gotten back to me on HOW to pay it its like #our electricity is already in debt lol it has a thing where you can go £10 into debt before it switches off #and it usually wont switch off over weekends #presumably bc all but 1 places nearby thst we can top it up at are shut on weekends but anyway #so we're like. okay. it MIGHT last today and if it does thst SHOULD mean itll last till monday.#but then itll be at least a tenner in debt #then we only have to last till thursday but its. do we keep this money thats for The Thing that is once again unclear on how urgent it is #or do we spend it on the Soon To Be Immdiately Urgent thing #and thats not even CONSIDERING food lmao we. i got 2 loaves of bread so we can at least survive on toast for a few days #we got 3 maybe 4 meals worth of stuff still in the kitchen #like...at this point i dont even care if i have to go a few days without eating at all to make it to thursday but its.#its so fucked up those are the terms im thinking in #and this isnt asking for more donations i really cannot take that today im at the fuckin bottom of my barrel #and already feel hopeless and useless and an active drain to everything around me #but its. like. how. why. why is it still like this. why is it looking extremely unlikely its ever gonna change.#whats the point if its all for a few scattered handful hours of actual peace and comfort never mind happiness #tldr yes i am once again suicidal but small s #like in the sense of i would feel immense relief if a truck came at me on my way to work tomorrow and would not step out of the way but #dont have it in me to actually consciously act upon

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disdaidal · 2 months ago

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I feel like a massive idiot right now.

I double-checked my CV several times before sending emails to a few places (libraries nearby me). And only then did I realize that I hadn't customized my email application itself to be directed at a specific place, but I had basically copied the same application to almost all of them (application to the library in my area). 🙈 So then I had to send another email to each one and apologize and politely explain that I had 'accidentally copied' the name of my home area twice in that application, and that I'm 'specifically looking for this place-' yadda yadda.

I wanna crawl under the rock right now and never crawl back out.

#personal #i made that classic mistake that you should never make in this kind of situation #sighs #if i get rejected for this reason alone i wouldn't even blame them #i've still got some other places left to try for which i'm going to have to customize my cv and application again and well #my mind's been all over the place lately. i haven't been able to focus on anything #even the fun stuff #and i'm going to have a distance meeting with my counselor tomorrow and he told me last friday that he wants me to have sent these #applications by then. 'or else you're gonna have to lie and feel bad about it' lmao #i did tell him i already feel bad though. i've felt so unmotivated and useless lately i can't even begin to tell #it's just. i can't focus. it's terrible #this should be good for me and they're there to help me blah blah blah but i feel like i'm hopeless #that i cannot be helped. that i'm doomed to fail regardless #and i can't help it. it's weighing me down

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rosicheeks · 4 months ago

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#I’m burnt out #I’m exhausted #and completely hopeless #how do other people with severe mental health problems live their lives?#was really hoping these programs would kinda get me on the right track #but idk anymore #i desperately need a job #have $3 to my name 🙃#been seeing the ‘insufficient funds’ way too much lately #and don’t get me wrong I’d LOVE to get a job #but how the fuck am I supposed to have time to go to my class and a job #when I don’t even have the motivation/energy to get out of bed most days #also the thought of going somewhere new and interviewing and meeting new people makes me physically sick to my stomach #trying to get back into Instacart but when I worked through them last (no joke 6+ years ago) my account got suspended #and it’s super hard to get it back (I just feel like after so many years you should be deleted off of the data base but whatever)#anyway #it’s 4pm and I’m just getting out of bed 🙃#no clue what to eat and I wouldn’t eat anything but I’m getting a migraine 👌#ok rant over #lmao I’m sure you guys have missed my sad/ pessimistic shut up rosie posts 🤦🏽‍♀️#shut up rosie

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125storejuice · 5 months ago

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#okay so i talked to my therapist today and she helped me figure out more cleaning business stuff #its weird to feel hopefull again #like im grateful as hell for it but also it is such a weird feeling after feeling hopeLESS for so long #i also had apparently dominos points saved up so i got a free pizza today!!!#and i am celebrating!!!#but it sort of feels like i smelled the pizza and my stomach already hurts lmao

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trans-xianxian · 1 year ago

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also I just never really learned the skill of Making Friends With Someone. I don't really get how it works. like I am Incredibly good at Getting Along With People and being performatively charming, I can get along with almost anyone and be polite and friendly and have continous positive social interactions with them, but I don't know how to turn that into actual friendship. and some of this is my fault because I Know that I'm chronically afraid of over stepping and not realizing that I'm pushing myself onto a person who doesn't actually want to be friends with me so I just never reach out and that's bad and I need to stop doing that. but also how is it possible that no one ever reaches out to Me. ever. at all. I never have the chance to Accept the offer of a potential friendship. like what am I doing so wrong to signal to other people that they shouldn't try to be friends with me. like whats the deal

#like can I just not tell? are ppl trying to be friends w me and I just don't get it so they stop?#do I need a shirt that says I can't take hints throw rocks at me?#I refuse to accept that there is just something irrevocably wrong w me that makes it so no one wants to be my friend. so whats the catch.#I know I can make friends I have some. and by some I mean 5 #my entire social circle aside from ppl I'm literally related to #is 5 people #and theres nothing Wrong with that #I just wish it wasn't true about me #but I just don't get what I'm doing wrong #it feels like a stupid hopeless game no one ever told you the rules to but you're expected to understand anyway #anyway sowwy I've just been feeling very lonely lately lmao #need to make new friends need to be gay kissed #ghost posts #text

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