#i feel like no one really talks about the 'i'd rather die than return to zariel'

[avernusfuries]

Okay but I really, really enjoy the development between the go to Avernus ending for Karlach, and beginning of the game Karlach, and it's personally my favourite because the notion of dying over returning explicitly speaks a lot about her frame of mind when we first meet her. She could handle the fighting. That's second nature to her. Karlach is a very personable and social creature, and it was the loneliness that does her in.

If Tav, Wyll or Minthara goes with her? She shows that what she yearns for, outside of getting her heart back? Was the companionship. Sure, she briefly had Flo. We see that in how she delivers soul coins to her but with the price of her knowing precisely who went into those coins.

Not really a true friend and, considering her aversion towards devils and by extension, cambions?

Having someone there she can genuinely trust? Makes a big fucking difference. Sure, she can't touch them. But plenty of people get into relationships for the sake of companionship and this is honestly no different to that.

If she is unromanced, there is also a high and fair chance that she will still catch feelings regardless, whether or not it's one-sided.

Tbh, we see Karlach falling in love not only with the first person to show her affection? But with the notion of living, and continuing to live.

I may ramble on this a little more later when my shit gets sorted out.

NON RP BLOGS DNI.

[roosterforme]

Old Habits Die Hard Part 3 | Bradley Bradshaw x Reader

Summary: You and Bradley both seem startled by the way you feel about each other. And then Bradley makes a bold statement without saying anything.

Warnings: Angst, swears, sex

Length: 3100 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader (fuckboy college student Bradley)

Check out my masterlist

You ran down the stairs, not sure why you had been dumb enough to look for Bradley tonight in the first place. He wasn't for you. And you should know better. But those kisses... it had all been pretty innocent, but you were ready to start unzipping his jeans. 

But he was taken whether he wanted to admit it or not. Phoebe was everywhere. And it looked like she certainly wasn't the only one he was sleeping with, according to his door. He could flirt with you all he wanted, but he didn't get to have you, too. 

You rushed into the living room and Jeff immediately spotted you. "Damn, took you a while to find the kitchen?" he asked jokingly. 

You laughed it off, taking Jeff's hand. His eyes immediately went wide as he cautiously laced his fingers with yours. "Hey, I'm actually feeling really tired, and I think Janessa wants to stay longer. Can you walk me home?"

"Of course," Jeff replied, leading you toward the door. "I'd be happy to." 

He walked you the few blocks to your apartment, even letting you wear his hoodie when you started to shiver. You were embarrassed about kissing Bradley. Just mortified inside. He was not a good idea.

The last thing you thought about before you pulled Jeff in for a goodnight kiss was Bradley's door and all the names. So you kissed Jeff hard and slid your tongue along his lips until he opened his mouth to let you taste him. He tasted like beer, and he was using so much tongue now, you wanted to gag. He caressed your cheek and stabbed your mouth with his tongue before you pulled away. Because that was the worst kiss of your life. 

And the fact that you knew how expertly Bradley could kiss you undoubtedly made Jeff's kiss even worse. 

"You should come to the house again tomorrow night," Jeff whispered with his hand on your hip as you backed slowly up to your front door.

"Uh, maybe," you mumbled. "I'll think about it." You unlocked your door and squeezed yourself inside. "Thanks for walking me home."

------------------------------

Bradley took a minute to turn his phone off before following you down the stairs. He didn't know how to explain to you that he'd rather be with you than Phoebe or anyone else any day of the week. You were different. He liked talking to you. Being around you made him feel good. 

But as soon as he saw you taking Jeff's hand in yours, he felt the urge to punish himself by drinking a bottle of vodka. He watched you leave the house with Jeff, and he turned toward the kitchen.

Bradley made the rounds, chatted with some guys from the frats and flirted with some girls, all while he sipped from a bottle of Smirnoff. Hopefully he would be able to pass out before he called Phoebe back. A small part of him recognized that she was probably at the party somewhere, but he wasn't sure he wanted to see her right now.

As soon as he had polished off a third of the bottle of vodka, he started to pity himself. He knew better than to drink like this. He hadn't done this since July, when he had broken the table and ended up in the emergency room. He hadn't had any hard liquor since Chase got kicked out of the fraternity. Since the other guys started to carry around a grudge against Bradley. 

Then he was distracted from his feelings; Jeff had returned and he looked so smug. Bradley should be the one looking smug right now. He should still have you up in his room, still be kissing you, maybe even be fucking you by now. 

But instead he was listening to Jeff and some of his other fraternity brothers talking about you. "She was feeling tired, so I didn't want to invite myself in, but I just made out with her," Jeff said with the most obnoxious smile. And he made a point to look right at Bradley as he said it. "She's a good kisser," Jeff added, sending a smirk in his direction.

Bradley deserved this. Even though he had kissed you first, you picked Jeff. And Jeff wasn't wrong; you were a fucking great kisser. Kind of timid and shy, but still so hot, so sweet. Like sugar. 

Bradley took a huge sip of vodka, and staggered a bit in Jeff's direction. "She's sweet," Bradley said. "So sweet."

Jeff just looked at him with pity in his eyes. Because suddenly Phoebe was there, draping her arms around Bradley. 

"There you are! I've been calling you all night," she purred. Bradley tried to pull away, but her hands were on his chest and she was kissing his neck. He didn't like it when she touched his scars. "Let's go upstairs. I'm not even wearing underwear. Should still be easy for you even if you're drunk," she whispered, giggling next to his ear. She took his hand and guided it up her short dress.

Bradley wanted to tell her no. He tried so hard, even though he was wasted now. But she backed him into the hallway with her hand rubbing his dick through his pants. He was thinking about you though. You made him hard without touching him. You made him hard when he thought about you and imagined your voice.

"Come on, Bradley. I can see you're fucked up. I'll do all the work," Phoebe promised in a patronizing tone. Bradley didn't want to be alone, so he let her guide him up the stairs. She took his clothes off and got on all fours on his bed. He could see her pussy, and even through his drunkenness, he tried to fight it. But he couldn't. This was too easy. Too familiar. 

He rolled a condom down his length and fucked her until he came, gasping for air as he thought about you.

---------------------------------

Bradley must have passed out on top of his bedding. His head was pounding as he tried to open his eyes. He knew he wasn't alone, but he couldn't remember who was with him. 

Oh, but he'd been kissing Sugar. That was the last thing he could remember. Yes, you must still be here. He would feel better after he heard your voice again.

"I'm going to change into some of your clothes to sleep. It's cold in here." Phoebe. He was with Phoebe. That was Phoebe's voice.

"Fuck," Bradley groaned, standing up. The room was spinning, but he could still see the condom wrapper next to the bed. "No."

"What is wrong with you?" Phoebe asked as she rooted around in his drawers looking for a shirt. "You are acting so weird."

Bradley cleared his throat and looked at her naked backside. "I want you to leave."

She spun around to face him. "Excuse me?"

"Please, Phoebe. I want to be alone."

"What is your problem, Bradley? You know, I could go fuck any of your fraternity brothers, and they would be begging me to stay with them."

"Phoebe," he groaned, rubbing his throbbing head. 

"What's this about? Because you know I don't even care when you decide you feel like sleeping around. That doesn't matter to me. So let's just go to sleep and talk in the morning."

"Just go!" he begged. "Please, Phoebe. I need to be alone."

"Fuck you, Bradley," she said, pulling her tiny dress back on and storming out. Of course Bradley caught sight of his door before she slammed it shut. 

He flopped down onto his bed, cradling his head in his hands. He'd thought about you again. He'd thought about you the entire time he'd been in here with Phoebe. He had tried to convince himself you never left with Jeff. 

Bradley knew this was fucked up. And he would have given anything to have his mom back. He didn't know who else he could even talk to about this shit. Even if he could manage to get you to kiss him again, you weren't just a regular hookup. You were different. And he needed you to want to kiss him again, because you were all he could think about. He really wished Jeff would just fuck off and leave you alone. 

But it was Bradley's fault that you left. For some reason, he always went back to Phoebe. Maybe it was because she didn't care about his face, or because she already knew he was fucked up. But Bradley didn't feel so fucked up when he was with you. Now he was afraid his dependence on Phoebe was going to cost him. He needed you to know that Phoebe wasn't a threat. Nobody was. As he started to pass out again, a plan came together in his mind.

--------------------------------

You were still trying to wash the feeling of Jeff off of your mouth the next morning when you brushed your teeth. Why had you done that? You didn't even want him now. And you'd managed to put your bad kiss with Jeff at the font of your mind in place of your amazing kiss with Bradley. 

When you thought about Bradley's fingers gliding across your skin, you could have moaned. It just felt that good. Then you scowled. You didn't need a boyfriend, but you also didn't need a one and done hookup either. And that was likely all you would get from him. Why was he even flirting with you? He didn't need you for a good time. He'd been leading you on while he had Phoebe and who knows who else calling his phone. 

So you let yourself enjoy a lazy Saturday morning where your mantra was Guys Suck. You worked on some math questions, occasionally singing a little song you made up about how men were scum. Then you made a grilled cheese sandwich and took a long walk, still humming along to your song. 

You felt much better by that evening when Janessa came home to change before going back to Tyson's room for another night. 

"Come back with me," Janessa whined. "We can hang out together at the Beta house tonight. Drink all of their beer instead of our own."

You rolled your eyes but smiled. "You expect me to believe you won't immediately ditch me for Tyson?"

Then she smirked. "Well... I heard you made out with Jeff, so how do I know you won't ditch me for him?"

You gaped at her. "How did you hear about that?"

"Jeff practically made a public service announcement about it last night after he walked you home. He was telling all the guys about it."

Your heart was pounding, and you felt sick. "Was Bradley there? When Jeff said that?"

"Yeah, he was. And he got fucking trashed last night after that."

"He did?" you whispered. You couldn't stand the thought of Bradley knowing you had kissed Jeff after you had kissed him. "Oh."

"Just come with me. We can hang out, and then you can see Jeff."

You chewed on your bottom lip. "I need to take Jeff's hoodie back anyway, but I'm not staying long."

So you ended up at the Beta house, but you went right to the kitchen in search of Bradley. He wasn't there. You doubled back down the hallway and found Janessa again. 

"Have you seen Bradley?" you asked her, running your fingers along Jeff's hoodie in your hands. 

She shook her head. "No, but I did see Phoebe just now. She would probably know where he is. Oh, there she goes."

You turned to look where Janessa was pointing, and you gasped. Phoebe was stunning. Tall and blonde with bright eyes and just the right amount of curves. She was wearing a tiny skirt, and she looked pissed off. You watched her storm up the stairs that led to the bedrooms on the second floor. 

Janessa was distracted by Tyson again, so you crept along the hallway and started up the stairs as well. You lied to yourself, pretending you just intended to leave Jeff's hoodie outside his door. But of course you were now eavesdropping on Bradley and Phoebe. You froze before you reached the top of the stairs, because their conversation was loud. Bradley sounded angry. You'd never heard his voice like this before. You were used to him being soft and raspy, but now he was close to yelling. 

"Phoebe, you can't just keep coming over after I don't answer your calls!"

"Oh please, Bradley. It barely took any coaxing last night after you saw what I was wearing! I figured your phone battery had died or something."

There was a pause before Bradley said, "I was wasted last night. I didn't even remember what we did until I woke up."

"So a normal night for you then?" Phoebe asked with venom, and you really hated her voice. 

"Phoebe, I haven't been drinking as much, and you know it. I've been trying... since July."

"Then why did you get blasted last night?" she asked a little softer this time.

Another pause, and now Bradley's voice was quieter, so you crept up to the top of the steps, closer to his open door. "You want me to be honest with you? I don't think we should spend time together anymore. I don't think we should be calling each other for hookups. It's not a good idea now."

"Fine," she agreed, but she didn't sound like she was fine with it. "But if this is why you painted your door today, then you can just go fuck yourself. I don't care who she is, there's no way she's as good as I am in bed."

You were standing at the top of the stairs as Phoebe slammed his door closed and stormed down the hallway. She barely glanced in your direction as she descended the stairs in a huff. You continued toward Bradley's room, dropping off Jeff's hoodie on the way. 

When you saw Bradley's door, you froze in shock. It had been freshly painted a clean, glossy white. All of the names, including Phoebe's, had been covered up entirely. But your lips curled into a surprised smile as you read what was now written across his door. You recognized Bradley's handwriting from flipping through his notebooks, and he had apparently taken a black sharpie to his pristine door after painting it. 

SUGAR

what's your number?

You were smiling so much, it would have been mortifying if Bradley opened his door and found you there. He had told Phoebe to get out. He had covered up all the names and phone numbers. He had asked you for yours. 

Maybe he was still thinking about kissing you. Maybe he'd let you explain that you were one hundred percent not interested in Jeff.  

You raised your fist and knocked. 

"Phoebe, seriously! I just want to be alone!" he yelled through the door.

You backed away slowly, now unsure of yourself. You chewed on your lip and then spotted the sharpie marker sitting on the floor next to the door. Before you could change your mind, you wrote your phone number just below the note Bradley had left for you. 

This was a game. At least right now it was. He'd put the ball in your court, and now you'd put it back in his. You capped the marker and took it with you. No way you wanted anyone else writing on his door, especially not before Bradley saw it for himself. 

Maybe he would text or call you. You hoped he would. You looked at Jeff's sweatshirt on the floor in front of his door and tried to sneak out of the house before he saw you. 

-------------------------------

Bradley woke up on Sunday morning with a clear head after having had nothing to drink and nobody stay over with him the previous night. He felt amazing. He stretched out in bed, his morning wood tenting the sheet as he closed his eyes and let his hand drift down his body to grasp his cock. 

He thought about you. It was all you. He smiled as he jerked himself off, thinking about your lips on his, remembering how you used his name instead of his nickname. He came all over his own abs, wishing you were with him. He just stayed there, sprawled out for a few minutes before he stood to get cleaned up. 

Bradley had been hoping you'd stop by again last night. He'd been reeling since he learned you kissed Jeff right after you'd been kissing him. But he liked you a lot. And he could tell you liked him even though you thought you'd be better off with Jeff. 

He'd get you straightened out. 

He grabbed a clean towel and headed to the bathroom, but the door was locked. He knocked and heard Tyson and Janessa both respond from inside. 

"Don't make a mess!" Bradley yelled. "I just cleaned in there!"

With a sigh, he turned back toward his room, already thinking he'd probably want to wipe down the surfaces when they were done in the bathroom. 

"Holy shit," he whispered when he saw the outside of his door. You must have been to the house last night. Either that or someone else was playing a prank on him. He grabbed his phone from his deck and saved the phone number as Sugar in his contacts. While he was in there, he deleted all of the names and numbers of the girls who he didn't even know. That left just a handful of people he cared about, but that was fine, because he was already texting you now.

Then he sat on the edge of his bed with his towel and waited, his morning shower completely forgotten. Because you wrote back.

--------------------------

You were eating breakfast when Bradley texted you. 

Sugar, is that really you?

You smiled and squealed as you responded.

Beer Boy, is that really you?

You paced around, waiting for him to write back.

It's me. I wish you hadn't run out on Friday night. Do you like my door?

"Oh my God," you whispered out loud as you wrote back to him.

I do. Are you planning on adding more names?

He wrote back immediately. 

No.

-------------------------

The door!! OMG!!! Thanks for reading, please leave me some love! And thank you to @mak-32 for helping me make this fic a reality. This is for you, Mak!

PART 4

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[alicelufenia]

So yeah had the chance to sleep on it and gonna give my full thoughts on the (unannounced) new dialogue for Minthara when Durge makes the decision to reject [SPOILER]. Gonna keep it under the cut but also read @shoddynomenclature's flashfic about it, it echos a lot of my feelings on the subject.

I think this had the potential to be something that makes her character even more nuanced and interesting by showing an uglier side of herself. Yes she has been abandoned by gods before, and the pain of that can't be understated. So seeing Durge reject Bhaal, to walk away from an inheritance when she was taken from Lolth against her will? Must feel frustrating. Seeing a character work through those emotions and fucking it up could be really good. COULD be.

This one conversation, where she throws everything about her relationship with Durge aside and turns her back on them with just a single non-critical response and no follow up? This ain't it.

I hate to say it, but this addition has all but killed my interest in playing Durge, if this is what it does to her character.

I'd LIKE it if there will be future additions, conversations you can have back at camp after the stress of the day has passed, to ask her what's really going on here. Yeah it WOULD be nice if there were some follow up where we can talk to her about our reasons for rejecting Bhaal, with the option to reconcile. Which could even lead neatly into her post-Orin speech, y'know some of her best writing in the game where she realize that Bhaal is no different than Lolth, or the Absolute.

Or, the chance to refuse to get back together with her after that. The only other way to break up with Minthara currently is cheating, which sucks, whereas having a big ugly argument and deciding "We've both said our peace, and understand each other better now, but we can't be together. Not after all this." THAT'S Really Good.

But unlike others, I have no confidence that any such addition is coming.

Because (if I understand it right) this dialogue was datamined from release, but was always inaccessible until the recent hotfix. So it was easy to ignore, treat it as cut content like the pregnancy plot (which I still don't get and frankly at this point I don't wanna know).

By deciding to make it accessible, Larian has made it clear that they want this to be a part of her character. But unlike this dialogue, there isn't any follow up sitting in datamine waiting to be turned on.

As far as we know, this is it. It's useless to speculate on what they could add (why add to her writing so piecemeal like this anyway?) because they didn't wait until they HAD more, to make this a part of her writing. Hell, it wasn't even worth mentioning in the hotfix notes!

Loving her partner to the degree she's willing to put aside her thirst for power is such a key part of Minthara's character that this dialogue completely abandons. What Larian is saying here is that her love for Durge was just a ruse to entice someone she could control into acquiring power, even at their expense. And if that's Larian's vision for Minthara's character, then why stop with Durge?

Why does she break up with Durge for rejecting Bhaal, but not with Shadowheart for rejecting Shar?

Or Astarion if he remains a spawn?

Why shed all those real tears for Karlach if she'd rather die than return to Avernus?

Why continue to share Tav's bed if they refuse the Astral Tadpole? Why offer no real objection if they destroy the brain, though she's rooting for them to take control of it right up until the moment? Why can she find power enough in the two of them with the Absolute gone to continue their plans for conquest, but Durge refusing to become just like Orin, her tormentor she swore to kill, is a dealbreaker?

If she tells my Tav the bond they share is called alurlssrin, can I even believe her, when she said the same to Durge only to call them stupid for believing in love right after?

Do you see the problem here?

Do you see why people would rather this dialogue not exist, if this is what it does to her character?

[judesmoonbeauty]

The Past Records: Ellis & Jude Chapter 3

Fan translation only. Not 100% accurate. Please expect grammatical errors. Cybird owns everything. Feel free to re-blog, but please do NOT post my translations elsewhere. Also, feel free to ignore my random commentary.

Translation notes are marked with ***

Roger: A story I know, huh.

Harrison: I mean, why didn't you tell me you knew each other first?

Roger: You didn't ask.

Harrison: You......

Roger: Besides, we're not really close friends either.

Roger: As for whether those guys can be trusted, I can't say.

Harrison: So, how do you know each other?

Roger: Just as a doctor and a patient. Jude has weak bronchial tubes.

Roger: My dad's so good at what he does that sometimes he used to go over to my parent's house where he worked as a town doctor.

Roger: When he was a patient of my father's, well, I just knew him by his face.....

Roger: One night, he rolled in and said he'd been stabbed with a knife. Not to my dad, but to me.

Harrison: What were the details of the stabbing?

Roger: All he said was that, “I got stabbed because of a grudge.”

Flashback Begins -

Jude: I got what I deserved. I won't say anything more. Don't ask me again.

Roger: I see. I can't believe you're talking to me, and not my dad because you don't want this out in the open.

Jude: I thought you wanted a table to practice your techniques on.

Jude: You can practice without a medical license.

Jude: In return, I won't tell me how you treated me, so as not to ruin the reputation of your father's clinic.

Roger: Convenient for me and you, huh? Well, I suppose it is.

Ellis: Roger? Can you fix him?

Roger: Oh, don't worry. I'm quite skilled. I won't kill you.

Ellis: Thank God. I can't have him dying now.

Roger: What's with that talk? When can he die?

Ellis: Probably the happiest moment of his life......

Roger: Huh. With all this damage, it seems like that's going to be a long way off.

Jude: Hey, I'm pretty sure that's not where you should stick the needle, you Quack!

Flashback ends -

Harrison: You treated him before you got your medical license, huh?

Roger: Haha. It's too late for the statute of limitations now, right?

Harrison: What else do you know?

Roger: Oh? Yeah..... like how Jude gets up early in the morning, or how Ellis eats more than anything?

Harrison: Not about that.

Roger: Jude can drink at the same pace as me and not get crushed, but Ellis gets drunk rather easily.

Harrison: It's not like that either....I've got two more images in my head that I don't need to know.

Roger: As I said earlier, I'm not sure if they're trustworthy or not.

Roger: There's something those two are keeping from me too. It's like conducting research that costs a huge amount of money or something.

Roger: Well, regardless if you can trust them or not, I don't think they'll do anything halfheartedly.

Roger: Was that helpful? Harrison: Well, sort of. At least the information I got from you wasn't false.

Roger: Thank you.

Liam: I found you.

Harrison: Hmm...oh, Liam. How did you know I was here?

Liam: Will told me. Are you at the cafe to work on a review?

Harrison: If I'm in the castle, I'll be distracted by the report, so I had to change things up.

Liam: Haha, so if I report now, It'll just remind you.

Harrison: It's fine. I just lost my focus. Anyway, you called out to me didn't you?

Liam: So, what?

Liam: Well, then, be my guest. Let's see, first of all, the story I heard from Jude...

Liam: Is Jude a doctor? A scholar? He was enrolled in public school through the mediation of a doctor or a scholar!

Liam: Surprising, isn't it? It must have been absolutely hard to fit in with all those aristocratic kids. I'd like to see a little bit of that.

Liam: Next, what I heard from Ellis. Ellis said that he didn't go to school.

Liam: I heard his father was a church school teacher, but they split up a long time ago.

Liam: Oh, Ellis and I promised to go skating by the lake sometime.

Harrison: Heh, good for you.....I mean, how did you talk to those two? You haven't been at the castle for the last few days.

Liam: I followed them invisibly and followed them, investigating their actions and routes the last few days.

Liam: Or maybe we just happened to on the way home together? Harrison: I didn't realize you went that far....

Liam: I thought Harry would like it. The rest was simply my feline curiosity getting the better of me.

Liam: I followed them and talked to them directly, but I still can't trust them.

Liam: I feel like I'm missing something decisive here.

Harrison: That look on your face...you're up to something.

Liam: That's my bad friend! You're quick.

Liam: So, why don't we give the two of them a shot.

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[trials-of-a-spirit-worker]

Ghost Hunting Shows Opinions and Why

Ghost Adventures

I can’t even begin to tell you how fucking obnoxious I find them. I mean I’m sure you see it from my writing. Anyone who’s been here long enough knows how I feel about these fuckers.

“Aaron, I magically have a condition where I cannot go down the spooky basement where this aggro spirit, that I’ve managed to piss off in the last 20 minutes is lurking. He’s known for snapping necks. Go down there with a glow stick and go hump the pole, he hates that. Good luck.”

Poor Aaron though. Everyone does the dirty work and Zac just sucks up all the notoriety and shit cause he’s supposedly “conventionally attractive.” (I don’t see it. And you can’t give me the queer excuse. Cause I still like men.) And the voice he does. Annoying. Who the fuck talks like that? I'd rather hear Channing Tatum's shitty gambit do this shit.

Honestly, especially since there was all these articles and confessions about them forging evidence, I’ve just liked them less and less. Ghost hunting and paranormal things of that nature in the world of science is already seen as a joke and shit. We don’t need these chucklefucks fucking up that reputation even more cause they want to make ratings. Where’s the love? Where’s the passion? 

Hate em. 0/10

Ghost Brothers

Okay, can I talk about how much I love the representation though!? Cause its usually a joke that the Black people die first in scary movies cause we make too much sense or we just don’t end up in that situation. Which I mean…true. We don’t stay long in scary ass situations. Spooky ass shit happens we fucking leave. Point blank.  But yeah, love seeing my brothers working in the ghost hunting game.

Now they’re greenhorns, in every sense of the word. But that isn’t a bad thing. They’re adding new perspectives, are not afraid of learning. They use their feelings and their bodies alongside the technological evidence. What I really like about them is how respectful they try to be. They always err on the side of politeness and you can’t go wrong with that.

One scene that will live with me forever is when they all tried to date that one ghost who was ghosted (sorry for the pun but not really) by her lover and killed herself in despair over it. That scene will never not be funny/cute to me.

“You deserved someone who would be there for you, and I think I’m that guy.” Iconic. I want to see more of them and I heard some rumors it might return. I want the blackness so bad.

7/10 I want to see them go further.

Ghost Files/Buzzfeed Unsolved Supernatural

As much as I shit on both Shane and Ryan, and I love doing it. It’s my favorite one. Doesn’t mean Shane’s a good influence. I do like the idea of having a skeptic doing the hunting with you. It keeps you grounded and honestly, I respect that. What we need most in these types of these investigations is discernment. And other than the clear comedy and chemistry Shane delivers with Ryan, that's his purpose in the show. He's the reality to the hopeful in ghost hunting.

I say this as a firm believer myself (like no shit Sol, you're a death witch and a spirit communicator), we need more skeptics and people to keep the situation grounded for MULTIPLE reasons. We get excited, our desires/biases lead to looking more into results that might not have much. It's when the non believer/skeptic had nothing where we can get excited. Ghost hunting still follows the rules of science and the non excited/non believers help us being the control and the ones to demand repetition.

Now, on regards of if I think Shane is a fucking demon? I honestly just wouldn’t be surprised if he was. Cause he does some bullshit I don’t think anyone else can get away with. Disrespecting Annabelle to her face and living? Something’s looking out for that tall motherfucker. I’m checking him with holy water if I ever get the chance.

8.5/10

Ghost Hunters

The most respectful ones I’ve seen. They treat the ghosts humanely, with dignity. And from what I’ve seen they get good results. They’re the only ones I’ve seen that have been at the sites for multiple days as well. They use what they learn from their prior day to expand and get better evidence with the spirits. It's very cool to see and honestly in a way, super professional of them that way...

Another thing I like about them is they debunk when they can, sometimes right on the spot. I respect people who do this, because like I said, no one takes this type of thing very seriously because so many people take every bump and creek as evidence and that gets…annoying and discrediting. So, I have mad respect for them.

8/10  

My Haunted House

Okay, Lifetime, what the hell are we doing? This is a hot mess. The most horrifying thing about the show is the shit acting. The stories are cool though. My spouse and I make fun of this show…a lot. Its just good for entertainment. Something to listen to in the background if you ran out of true crime podcasts.

Good shit. 4.5/10

[missycolorful]

hallo there o/

I wanted to piggyback off your last post on the 'birdbrain/abandonment' post:

I feel this particular situation was bound to happen sooner or later. It's not the first time of late(within the last month) the children have felt abandoned/left behind by qphil. During Prison Event you could see the eggs thoughts on being left behind due to possible escape or interactions with other residents and lore.

Day 3 after the interview tallulah said, "I dont like it here.." and chayanne said, "Let's stick together today..". Qphil then turned it into a joke, "...STICK together.. cause he's holding a stick.." but I do not believe these words were said for nothing. Day 3 had dark themes surrounding the residents(inmate crucifixion) and as a child paying attention I would be scared and want my parent in sight much as possible.

Now of course we give grace to the ccs because streaming and events can take a toll. Phil had stated several times during the event he felt overwhelmed/stimulated, along with others agreeing with him.

At one point the eggs eventually burried them selves in hole, in which wasn't addressed until after a guard Tubbo and Charlie noticed. On the walls chayanne signs say: we are a ghost - we will die here and bit later tallulah states: we were wondering how lo g it took u to find us, we were thinking you were leaving us here.

Qphil reassured them but I got to thinking: every where he went residents had their eggs with them. When escaping with Charlie fit and tubbo, ramon was with fit and sunny was with either parent...qphil was alone. When talking to the guard for the hat, pomme was with aypierr - rishas and pepito were with their guardians and em/dapper was with bagi and bad...qphil was alone.

Giving benifit of doubt he was trying to protect them.(the guard was a butt)

That being said: the separation was scary, anything could have happened. Yesterday situation could have went very differently as well. The eggs could have been mortal. Something more dangerous than the scorpion could have caught them along their travel back home.

And this ALL is off the talks/agreement of them sticking together as a family. Having each others back. The situation is so interesting because after concerns are said qphil does comply with not taking his sight off them rest of stream. I really enjoy this family dynamic for some reason

Sorry for long post

oh gosh don't apologize, I'm eating this whole post up. And it's given me more to say, so... sorry in turn, lol!!

honestly, a lot of the prison event felt like a blur to me (a lot happened lol), so I completely forgot about those small moments. Like a lot of other similar moments, they're jokes, yes, but there's a certain weight to them. And these jokes they've been making have had a certain weight for a while now. And.... looking back, I feel dumb for not even mentioning the one thing that's really brought this whole issue, and these "jokes" and concerns the kids have, into existence.

It's the Ender King.

q!Phil has made it clear that if the Ender King finds him and seeks to capture him and take him away from the kids, there's nothing he can do. He's not sure if he can come back, if he does get taken, even though he swears he'll do everything he can to return to his kids. But that reveal of the Ender King and Phil's concerns about his fate by his hands has affected Chayanne and Tallulah greatly. It's good that he's been honest with them, I'd rather he be. But there's no good way to handle this, in truth.

Chayanne, after Purgatory, has been more clingy with his father, but I think it's more noticeable as of recent. Tallulah has tried to distance herself a little like sleeping at her and Wilbur's house, most likely out of a need to feel independent and such, but within the last month or so, she's also been fairly clingy. I think her attempts at being independent fell to the wayside once the idea of her father just... disappearing, and possibly never coming back, came to mind. She sleeps at the sanctuary (and now their new house as of the reset) more often than not. They're both afraid of waking up and seeing that the most consistent parental figure in their lives is gone.

Like, we all know that q!Phil isn't actually abandoning them or even leaving them behind with any malicious or neglecting purpose, and I think the kids know he wouldn't do so with intention (which is why him being defensive yesterday was sort of a moot point, but anyway). Plenty of the parents will let their kids mind their business and do things without them around. This isn't new, and this has happened with Phil's kids plenty of times! For example, Phil didn't want his kids around during a lot of the prison stuff, because a lot of what he was doing was risky, and he didn't want them to get hurt. And we know that yesterday was a pure accident, and he wants to try to be more careful.

But technicalities and logic aren't really important here. What upsets the kids is simply the idea of him being gone, and the fear of him never coming back. It doesn't matter how many times he tells them that he will, because these fears are huge and real. You accidentally left the kids behind at Etoiles' house? It doesn't matter, you still left. You got kidnapped by the Ender King? It doesn't matter you're still gone.

[lumenflowered]

[The video begins with no small amount of glitching, but it seems to sort itself out after a few moments. Those capable of understanding the speech of Pokémon can identify the mon behind the camera as Ade grumbling about how this had better let her prove that Maria hasn't gotten herself killed, again.

The visual feed returns just in time for a voice that sounds almost identical to Maria's, but not quite, to ask, "What are you doing?"

"I—" Maria looks flabbergasted, for lack of a better description, when the video returns to her staring at Dee, both women at least standing again, though both look significantly less dry than they were in the previous video. "What are you doing here? I was under the impression that you would be out of contact for the next week?"

"Mallory had a bad feeling," Dee says simply, looking at the vaguely Dratini-shaped creature coiled around her arm. "Her bad feelings tend to indicate very bad things, and while I am not entirely certain Professor Oak can handle that Porygon on his own... that could have killed you."

"...I know," Maria says softly. "But if that was what it took—"

"Why are you like this," Mallory grumbles.

"...I understand," Dee replies, "but I would rather that not happen regardless."

"Why are you both like this. Do you not have a shred of self-preservation between you?"

"I'd rather it not either," Maria protests, "but this is about more than one person. If Team Rocket brings Lugia under their control—if Giovanni brings Lugia under his control—"

"Rocket's back?" This, far more than anything else ever, seems to alarm Mallory.

"Giovanni is... oh dear," Dee says mildly. "I was under the impression that you saw him die?"

"I was under the impression that I saw him die," Maria mutters. "Never mind that. We have other problems right now."

"By all means, continue," says Lugia, who has been oddly content to simply watch these three very strange Fallers talk. "This is strangely entertaining."

"Entertaining?" Dee echoes.

"Odd word for it," says the noodle-like thing wrapped around Dee's arm. "Very odd word for you trying to kill someone."

"You, godling," Lugia replies, "are far less so."

"Good. I wouldn't want to be—" Mallory pauses, suddenly. "Godling?"

"Your powers may be born of a different source, from a different world." If Lugia seemed to not be particularly fond of Maria, his words to Mallory are practically dripping with disdain for her. "But you are nevertheless a god, and you have not once since forcing your way into this world acted like it."

"You...!" Mallory hisses at Lugia, which would probably be more intimidating if she wasn't a fairly small noodle of a being wrapped around Dee's arm. "You have no idea, no idea, what I have been through to get here. How hard I have fought to get here. But I've fought gods before. I've killed gods before."

"...Please don't," Dee says quietly.

"You are nothing compared to life's very beginning," Lugia replies.

"...Listen," Mallory says, turning towards Maria. "You need to convince him that Rocket is a threat? He'll probably be more willing to listen after I've kicked his ass. And I'm pretty good at that."

"I am aware," Maria says.

"Also, at this point, she's really starting to make it personal," Mallory continues. "I won't if you don't want me to. But I could."

"...Could I stop you?" There's no answer before Maria sighs. "Fine. I'll be back. Don't make things worse."

She looks far paler than she normally does, when she turns toward the camera and begins to walk away.

"Good to know you have so much faith in me," Mallory grumbles, right before she begins to glow, with... actually, that glow looks a lot like a Pokémon's evolution. Which is weird, because she isn't a Pokémon at all, is she?

...What's next to Dee, when the light fades, looks a lot more like a Pokémon than what was there before. It's a lot bigger, too. Smaller than Lugia, certainly, but not by very much.

Great purplish tendrils grow out from the creature's head, in a manner that almost looks like hair growing down its back. Its legs are clawed, almost more like arms than like legs, and it has a massive, whiplike tail.

It looks similar to the presence once behind the Hunter's Dream, to those familiar with it. Yet at the same time, it looks very different. More batlike than squidlike, without an exposed ribcage, and its face looks far more human.

Its eyes, especially—they gleam.

Dark wings—that look kind of like a bat's, and kind of like a Dragonite's—unfurl from the creature's back, as it, as she, launches herself at Lugia with a furious, earsplitting screech.

"...We should go," Dee says faintly, standing back from where the gods are beginning to fight each other in earnest.

"That... yes," Maria agrees, still staring. "That we should."

Even so, she doesn't move until Dee hesitantly grabs her arm and begins to pull her back toward where the Kimono Girls are.

It's at that point that the video ends.]

[theyilinglaozus]

I mentioned this briefly over on MDL yesterday, but since I'm back from my theatre trip I figured I'd say a little something about the Shōgun finale here too.

I've seen quite the divide in how people felt about the ending; some hated it whilst others, myself included, loved it.

I think one of the things that some people feel disappointed by is the fact we never got to see the battle of Sekigahara that the show was building up to. Yet the truth is that Shōgun was never going to show it, because in terms of the story the viewer didn't need to see the battle to know the outcome.

The story was always about Toranaga and the journey he takes towards becoming Shōgun. He is a master strategist, and has been playing the game of war from the very start, just silently and through methods of politics rather than by the sword. He uses every person to his advantage, moving them like pieces on a board for his endgame, even those who he is closest to. Sure, there are moments he likely doesn't account for - the death of his son and the appearance of Blackthorne, for instance - but like any strategist of his level he either adapts them into his plans, or finds a way to use the moment in his advantage. That's what strategists do.

We don't need to see the battle of Sekigahara, because by the end of the show Toranaga has already won. This is what he tries to tell Yabushige before his death. Toranaga's explanation here reminds me to the moment he's talking to his son, with this quote:

'Why is it that only those who have never fought in battle are so eager to be in one?'

War is inevitable, but Toranaga is trying to minimize the number of those who have to die because of it. After all, his goal is for a peaceful era for Japan.

Mariko's death was the final act of Crimson Sky. Her death shakes the foundations enough to cause action to happen, because her death should not have been allowed to happen. Ishido knows this, which is why he sends his ronin to capture, not kill. Mariko's death, while tragic, is the final nail that sparks change. Ochiba, mourning the death of her childhood friend, decides to tell Toranaga in secret not to send the Heir's army to aid Ishido in battle, meaning that without his banner Ishido's war is no longer a lawful one.

While Mariko's death is a tragic one, it is not a meaningless one. It does not feel cheap, and the finale episode allows the viewers to mourn with those who knew and loved or respected her. I thought this was quite beautifully done, as even though she wasn't present in the episode, her spirit was still there, so she was still very much there. Some of the cinematography beautifully alluded to this, especially in moments like when Blackthorne and Fuji are sitting together in silence, yet there's one seat left -- Mariko's. Blackthorne even says then, 'no translator', because once Mariko had been a bridge of communication and understanding between them.

Another thing which I see a lot of confusion upon is Blackthrone's flash-forward scenes -- did he ever return to England? The answer, in my opinion, is told in the finale episode too. No, he didn't. Toranaga tells Yabushige that Blackthorne will never leave Japan, and in the scenes with an older Blackthorne, we see he's holding Mariko's cross. Yet he drops it into the water, showing that he lets it go. The episode title is 'a dream of a dream', and that's what Blackthorne's flash-forwards are: dreams. Another life, another path - but not this one.

The characters of Shōgun are based on real-life people in history -- it's actually really fascinating, and I've been learning more and more about their real-life counterparts whilst following this gem of a show. If you're interested in learning more, look up names like Tokugawa Ieyasu, Miura Anjin (William Adams) and Hosokawa Gracia (Akechi Tama).

All in all, Shōgun to me leaned more into the political intrique side of war, which for some people will be fascinating, and for others, not so much. But this show has so many layers and so much hidden within it, I can see it being one that's analysed for years to come.

[shy-urban-hobbit]

The first thing that Aiden was aware of was that he was no longer lying on the hard ground (although the matress he was currently on wasn't much of an upgrade). The second thing was that he was alone if the lack of any additional heartbeats was an indication. He took a moment to catalogue the various aches and pains whilst wishing painful and embarassing venereal diseases on any and all Mages.

It wasn't bad enough that they'd walked straight into a trap (although to be fair this one was using children as bait, what else could they do?). Oh no, he'd decided to do the whole 'one of you drink from the mystery chalice and I'll let the other one go' thing, not even trying to disguise its contents. Aiden hadn't thought twice about knocking it back before the Mage had even finished monologuing, shooting a smirk at Lambert before collapsing to the ground in pain as his guts tried to claw their way out of his body.

Speaking of, the door opening accompanied by Lambert's unique scent informed him that his fellow Witcher had returned. Aiden started counting down from five in his head, knowing that his heart rate would give away the fact that he was awake, even if he wanted to avoid opening his eyes for a little longer. He got to three before he felt a fist clench in the front of his shirt, pulling him upwards and into a solid chest.

"You fucking twat!"

Aiden winced, "Indoor voice please, Love." He said hoarsly, burying his nose in Lambert's collar bone, "Loud noise bad right now."

Lambert adjusted his hold so he was now cradling Aiden against his chest, "You stupid fucking Cat." He whispered, "What were you thinking?"

"That I'd rather chug poison than carry on listening to that arsehole."

"I'm serious, Aiden." Lambert tightened his hold, "I had to watch you basically commit suicide and fucking smile about it?!" His voice was getting louder again, but he was too angry to care, "You absolute prick! I had to watch you writhing on the floor in agony whilst I tried to force an antidote into you which I wasn't even sure would work, and then I had to practically sprint back to the inn with you, praying the entire fucking time that I wouldn't have to listen to your heart stop. I was...you..."

Aiden felt guilt start to gnaw at him. Lambert didn't need to say any more for Aiden to know he'd scared him, and scared him badly.

"I'm sorry Lam." He reached up to run fingers through his Wolf's hair, purring low in his chest in an attempt to both comfort and self soothe. Lambert allowed the gesture withought complaint.

"I know this doesn't make it right but, for what it's worth, I was never going to die."

Lambert snorted, "Don't talk shit. We could both smell what was in it. That stuff's fatal when combined with mutagens."

"When combined with wolf mutagens."

"The fuck are you talking about?"

"The initial reaction is the same but, for Cat Witchers," Aiden shrugged, "After that wears off. For us, it just feels like a really bad White Gull hangover. On that note."

Aiden pulled back and proceeded to puke on the floor, luckily avoiding Lambert's boot.

"You deserve that." Lambert said dryly, wiping Aiden's mouth with his sleeve.

"I know, and I'm sorry."

"For not telling me that sooner, scaring me half to death or puking on the floor of the room we're sharing?"

"All three. I swear I would've told you about the poison thing if I'd had the chance. Only there wasn't a lot of time between downing it and, you know..."

Lambert couldn't smell any trace of a lie through the guilt and misery.

"As soon as you're well you're giving me a fucking crash course in Cat mutagens." He said, moving to lie on the bed and pulling Aiden on top of him., "You're also cleaning that by the way." He gestured with his head to the puddle of vomit.

"Be nice to me, I'm sick!"

[asagirisfavoritepen]

Alright, so I'd like to share my theory about who's gonna join the Port Mafia from the Agency, since everyone is talking about this.

First of all, let's review the members so I don't forget them.

Atsushi, Kyouka, Yosano, Ranpo, Dazai, Kunikida, Ranpo, Kenji, Tanizaki and Fukuzawa. I didn't count Naomi and Haruno because they aren't as important.

Everyone thinks that Mori will want Dazai, Yosano or Tanizaki. Well, he won't want Dazai. He knows Dazai hates him and that he wouldn't be loyal to them. Dazai would find a way to destroy the Mafia from the inside. He won't take Yosano, as Fukuzawa made sure of this. I know he said he wants her, but that won't be the case. Tanizaki has more chances than the other two, but I still don't think it's him, because it's pointed out multiple times he would he good as an assassin. Reverse psychology.

Then we have Kenji. I think they wouldn't take him, not because he's a child or a half-timer, but because despite his strong ability, he would be useless for the Mafia. Look at his personality and everything.

Kyouka will not be the one either. Because Koyou knows she's safer there. And Kyouka already betrayed the Mafia once. She won't be loyal. I feel like Kyouka would rather die than return to the Mafia.

It's not Ranpo either, and not because he doesn't have an ability, but because he would too destroy the Mafia from the inside. He would refuse to do anything against Fukuzawa's words, so he won't be against a member joining, but it won't be him the one.

Kunikida will not join the Mafia either, because of his morals. As interesting and entertaining as it would be to watch Kunikida go against his ideals in order to protect the ADA, he couldn't do it. Also, I don't think Mori finds him interesting enough.

Atsushi's out of the question too. Dazai's influence is too strong on him. He's basically Dazai's puppet. It would be very entertaining to watch Atsushi in the Mafia, killing and hurting people. But it's not the case.

And lastly Fukuzawa. He's the one that will join the Port Mafia. Why? First of all, at this very moment, he can basically control everyone. Mori wouldn't like that power used by anyone else. Second, Fukuzawa was an assassin. A skilled one. Just imagine how smooth his work would go. When he leaves the ADA, Atsushi and Kyouka will both lose control over their abilities, which would make it easier for the Mafia to kidnap them if they want and also do any illegal action since there would be less ADA members to bother them. We would also get to see Kunikida as the president which has to happen since it was said he's the second after Fukuzawa in the same episode/chapter Aya first appeared. We would also get sirious/sad Ranpo, who will do anything to get Fukuzawa back. Just imagine the angst.

I could be wrong. Maybe Mori will not take anyone to join the PM or he'll choose someone else. But I really think and maybe hope it'll be Fukuzawa.

[ncon29]

Helvetica - The Documentary

The Rise, Flatline, and Fall of the Modernist Movement's Darling Poster Child

Name: Helvetica (Die Neue Haas Grotesk) Parents: Max Miedinger and Eduard Hoffmann Nicknames: "Perfection" / "Ubiquitous" / "Air" / "Ultimate Typeface"

1950’s - post-war period - feeling of idealism

Social responsibility for designers

More democracy, clarity, rebuilding

Early experiments of High Modernist period - Swiss style

1957 - HELVETICA IS BORN !!! - rational typeface for all kinds of information to present ideas in intelligible/legible way - loud and clearly modern

Interesting that early modernism (dadaism, futurism, surrealism) was more subversive and that functionality emerged later

Would you use Helvetica in your designs?

I don't have particularly strong feelings toward it. Jonathan Hoefler says "it's like off-white paint" and many of the other designers in the documentary say it's like air. It's just there. I would use it if it matches the look that I'm going for, but I typically prefer more expressive typefaces - I'd probably manipulate the original form, at least. It's ubiquitous, versatile, and functional, sure, but why would I use it when there are so many other typefaces. Bit corporate. Bit SnoozeVille.

Like Rick Poynor put it (regarding designing with Helvetica over a period of time), “There’s a law of diminishing returns”. More exposure -> more use by designers -> more predictability -> uh oh it's dull now.

No flavour is the point but that doesn't mean I have to love it.

It's ok but why limit yourselfffff (to one type family). I guess to push your ideas as a designer. But experimenting outside that seems more fun to me. Some people favour restrictions though, so to each their own.

My view leans towards that of Erik Spiekerman (Gemini King), who says “[Type] just makes my words visible” and that “A real typeface needs rhythm, needs contrast; It comes from handwriting. That’s why I can read your handwriting, and you can read mine. And I’m sure out handwriting is miles away from Helvetica… But we can read it because there’s rhythm to it, there’s a contrast to it.” Obviously, you can't always read handwriting, but personally I'm pretty good at it and find it much more compelling than consistent, uniform typefaces. Spiekerman on letters designed to look the same: "Hello??? You know, that’s called an army. That’s not people.” This sentiment is interesting and appeals to me, because I like it when type has personality, as it's a means for social communication -- informed by people. Then again, uniformity is just another style. But, I personally like when you can tell that a human being made something with heart and intention, and if you can do that with Helvetica, then knock yourself out ig. Michael C Place expresses that though he doesn't know the fancy type terminology, he values the emotional response that type can bring and enjoys "the challenges of making Helvetica speak in a different way”. I can admire that idea: Originality with Helvetica depends on execution.

I do like how the designers in the doco describe the typeface in regard to the space between characters as opposed to the space that the characters fill. Mike Parker says “It’s not a letter that’s bent to shape; It’s a letter that lives in a powerful matrix of surrounding space”. The negative space is said to contain the characters which is an effective, formidable way to put it. Similarly, Massimo Vignelli says "typography is really white" which I find to be a refreshing perspective.

Would you use Helvetica for one context (type of work/audience) but not another?

Yes, as long as it suits the content, my vision/the client's vision. It would not be my first choice unless I was going for that neutral look, modernist style, or just maximising attention to the actual text, rather than its appearance.

Not as passionate about this topic as some designers involved in the documentary but it's fun/ny to watch them talk about it with such vigour.

____________________________________________________________

Michael Bierut: “In Helvetica. Period. Any questions? Of course not”

Wim “Gridnik” Crouwel:

“But if I see today's designers, they use all typefaces-one day one typeface, the other day the other typeface, all in favor of a certain atmosphere, I'm not... I don't like that... The meaning is in the content of the text, not in the typeface.”

Why must the meaning derived from either or be mutually exclusive ? Surely both the content and typeface can be used to amplify the message. It's about feeling and communication. Typefaces are just tools. Ricky P says type gives words "a certain colouring" which conveys a sense of a ranging intensity.

Paula Scher: "I was also morally opposed to Helvetica because I viewed the big corporations that were slathered in Helvetica as sponsors of the Vietnam War." <- Personal, moral implications.

Massimo Vignelli: thinks postmodernism is a DISEASE

Tobias Frere-Jones: Type Expression = important

“The same way that an actor that's miscast in a role will affect someone's experience of a movie or play that they're watching. They'll still follow the plot, but, you know, be less convinced or excited or affected.”

David Carson

“Don’t confuse legibility with communication.” I agree.

“If something is a very important message and it’s set in a boring, non-descript way, the message can be lost.” I neither agree nor disagree. Depends on execution.

Questions:

Why are there so many Michaels?

How was Erik's birthday?

Why do I prefer this typeface to Helvetica? It's cuter.

✋︎ ⬥︎♋︎■︎⧫︎ ⧫︎□︎ ⬧︎♏︎♏︎ ⧫︎♒︎♏︎❍︎ ❍︎♓︎⌧︎ ♋︎■︎♎︎ ❍︎♓︎■︎♑︎●︎♏︎ ♌︎♏︎♍︎♋︎◆︎⬧︎♏︎ ♓︎⧫︎ ⬥︎□︎◆︎●︎♎︎ ♌︎♏︎ ♐︎◆︎■︎■︎⍓︎ ✏︎

[thedawningofthehour]

I just had a morbid thought. But, what if Galois die? Either by an anti-mutant Yokai group, in a kidnapping attempt by the mercenaries or by members of the resistance? How would the characters react?

Well, that would be an incredibly unfulfilling end to the story, for one. And don't get me wrong, character deaths that are by design unsatisfying absolutely have their place, (Finnick's death in Mockingjay comes to mind) but I feel like it would be more frustrating here than make a point.

Honestly, I could see it going either way for Draxum. He could either give up right then and there and die with him, or he could go total Rhaenyra after Luke's death. Total liquidation on his enemies, and no mercy for his allies who object. Once that was over, though, he wouldn't really have any direction and would eventually end up destroying himself. He means it when he says he can't lose Galois. He could handle losing anyone else, everyone else. Even Cass, he'd totally go Angry Murder Dad for her as well, but it wouldn't destroy him like losing Galois would. (it might have been different if he was lying to himself about Cass's origins as well, but he still lies to himself and says she isn't his daughter)

If Cass is still alive and Galois is dead, then the world would end. Instantaneously. She'd explode like the birth of a star.

It would also kill Splinter. Not right away, he'd live long enough to get revenge on Draxum and everyone who contributed to his son's death, but he'd end himself not long after. He wasn't lying when he said he couldn't lose another kid. That also applies to losing the same kid twice. Losing Donnie the first time almost killed him as it was.

(Leo ramble under the cut because I went way off the rails-but fuck it I wrote the end scene of the next chapter in one sitting today I am allowed to go a little insane)

I'm hesitant to go all 'two halves of the same whole, twins can't live without each other' because we literally have proof that Leo can live without Donnie. We don't know how long Donnie's been dead by the point the movie starts-Leo having his bandana wrapped around his sword implies that it wasn't very recent, while Casey's familiarity with Donnie and the fact that his gear is certified GeniusBuilt shows that his death must have happened when Casey was old enough to remember him, or even after Casey started training and Donnie built weapons to suit his fighting style. So Leo's probably been without Donnie for at least a couple of years at that point. And he is still kicking ass and serving cunt, in his very homosexual way-though he does kind of have a whole-ass kid to raise and the resistance to live for, which he doesn't have in doth. And even in the movie, Future Leo throws himself into a Krang incineration beam rather than return to the past with Casey and live without the family he's lost. And there's the whole deal with Leo sacrificing himself so there's no chance whatsoever of living to see his brothers die.

I just don't see Leo being able to move on from something like that. Knowing his brother died pointlessly, maybe even painfully, never remembering who he was. There would be no closure, no point to start moving on. I talked about this with another fic author, the whole thing about fulfilling vs. unfulfilling deaths in media, and I think Future Donnie's death is as good as any to talk about that.

Like, let's talk about Replica's Donnie. He died epicly. In the midst of battle, sacrificing himself to plant a spy probe, and even got in some snappy comments to Prime (and maybe killing him too? I'd have to reread) before ending his own life. From his family's perspective, yes, it felt pointless and awful and they would much rather Donnie back than whatever bullshit he sacrificed himself for. And it's tragic for the audience, but it still feels satisfying. Donnie went out on his own terms, for a cause, in a literal blaze of glory. We see his family mourn, but we also see Leo receive some measure of closure from Omega telling him how proud Donnie always was of him. And crying right after-but as he tells Casey a frame later, he felt just a little better.

Or a more subtle example in Cass's series. Donnie's (temporary) death is none of that. He dies weakened to the point where he can't even stand up on his own, he dies quietly and he dies slowly. It was heartbreaking-like, bitch, I cried, but I don't think a single person would call it unsatisfying. Even with his quiet, demure death, so undeserving of him and his awesomeness, there was still a sense of satisfaction in the fact that he was such a threat that the Krang had to resort to such tactics to kill him. (and that he stuck it to them one final time, outliving their expectations and coming back to fuck them up when they thought they were safe, he had to be dead) And in the end, he's accepted his death, he tied up all his loose ends and feels ready to go. He dies peacefully, spending his final moments feeling his brothers' love for him. His brothers get to hold him and say goodbye. Yes, they're in mourning, but they show hints of healing and moving on-until Mikey finds out that Donnie's spirit isn't with their ancestors. That pulls the wound right back open, and Leo doesn't really seem to move on from there.

Having Donnie die as Galois I think would be a lot like that for Leo. Raph, Mikey, and even April would find ways to move on-after getting their revenge, of course, but they would use Donnie's memory to drive them forward. "Plant this tree because Donnie would have liked that." "Buy only produce from sustainable farming practices for my restaurant because Donnie would have approved." "Get that degree because Donnie would have kicked my ass if I didn't."

I don't think Leo would be able to do that. I think he'd feel very lost, with a lot of rage and sorrow and no real direction for any of it, no drive to find an outlet and get his life back on track. Maybe he wouldn't outright shoot himself, but he'd stop caring about keeping himself alive.

[feuqueerfire]

DFF Characters That Compel Me

Hard for me to say I like these characters but there are a few who I'm fascinated by and think about them often and apparently wanted to write a long post about it.

I'd love to hear if you have any characters that gave you brain rot and want to write about, especially because idk if most people have a favourite character in here? Or if they love the character? I'm curious to know how people interact with the characters in this show.

I'll talk about 3: New-Tan, Tee, and Fluke.

New-Tan

Of my top 3, the most obvious and popular one is New-Tan. I will always love a sibling bond in stories and what's better than sibling revenge? Especially delicious because New was a shit Phi to Non while they were living in the same house, didn't care about anything Non said or showed him, and probably did nothing to comfort Non when their parents looked at New more favourably. And yet, he gives up his entire self for Non: He gives up his scholarship and his education, he lies to his parents, and he constantly smokes drugs to get to see Non. He gives up his entire identity when he assumes the new role of Tan and becomes someone whose existence and purpose is to avenge Non. I liked the twist that it was actually New who was the driver behind the revenge, it felt so much more desperate. The revenge and killing also take so much patience and intelligence, whether it be the drugs or the traps or making Top the faux killer for a bit. In the end, he follows his brother's script and makes sure that they all die and nobody leaves that house.

I think a lot of love and support for New came from people's love and pity for Non because they wanted New to avenge Non. Non wasn't really a character that I felt much for, to be honest; like obviously his situation was sad but I never really thought about him when he wasn't on-screen, so I think my view of New is more about what doing all this means to New himself rather than what it means for Non.

I loved the ending for him too. As I said, he gave everything up and had nothing waiting for him out there, so it feels narratively fitting that he dies in that house with them. Before, New used to see Non tell him to take revenge and accuse him of abondoning him but here, he sees Non thank him for avenging him in his hallucinations. Then, he immediately thinks about using Uncle Dang and White as collateral, the innocents that he had to use and discard (the same way Non was), to gain that gratitude. Doesn't have much time to duel on it though because he's helpless again when he sees Non hang himself. I'm glad that the last thing New sees is Non emerging from the light to thank him before returning to the light.

Love him <3 Also look at his cute, mass-murdering face here (when Fluke shoots Top I think)

Seems like I have a lot to say, so I'll put Tee and Fluke under Read More.

Tee

In the earlier episodes, Tee was irritating as he and Top kept trying to destroy the footage, fucking ran off with the motorcycle, and were just being overall selfish and hiding things. In the past, I was softening up to Tee when we discovered that he, as a teenager, works doing shady shit for his uncle to buy meds for his father but he was still a POS.

I can't believe he covered for Top and made Non not only take the blame for it but also dragged him into the stupid gang mafia horse account shit with him. He brought Non into this world that had no way of escape, like if Non couldn't get the money, interest would continue accruing and he'd be trapped in the cycle while after he did get the money, Non was beaten and kidnapped. Non literally died in the stupid room.

Yet Tee claimed he didn't think that his uncle would truly kill Non or whatever, how stupid, how can you think that after you've worked under him? His naiveté confused me and I still wonder if it wasn't purposeful ignorance. If Tee convinces himself that he truly never guessed what could happen to Non, maybe he'll feel less guilt about what ended up happening. Selfish, selfish.

Tee felt so alone, even if he was in the group it's not like he could tell them about his side hustle (except fuckass Top). When he was consumed by guilt after Non's death, he still couldn't tell anybody what truly happened. He didn't have family to rely on, either. His scene with his father was so sad as he cried that his father was supposed to be the one taking care of him but his dad was laughing about how Tee has gray hairs now. Ah, sad.

Then, of course, he meets the only good thing in his life, White. He's such a bastard to White too, like getting his high school bf who is 2-years younger into pot lol (White was probably 15 there?), fucking leaving White to get on that bike with Top, and also his apparently uncontrollable jealousy. It seemed like such an over-the-top reaction when he reacts badly to White and Jin's acting scene in ep 1 and the fact that White's hallucination fear at the end involved Tee breaking up with him with accusations of being unfaithful? Bro, Tee, while White was brining light into your life, what the hell were you doing for White? And then of course the end, where he stabbed White... I don't even have words.

I like Tee but I'm influenced by Tee/White, sue me. I've been watching edits and been in a state of disarray because I'm so sad about this. Fucking fuck fuck. I watch series and sometimes I love a pairing and that manifests into me thinking up scenarios of them post-canon or in a missing scene in the show. Can't do that here, can I? Fuck, I was prepared for Tee to die. I needed Tee to die, I wanted him dead dead dead. I was not prepared for what the fuck they gave me, I can't believe Tee stabbed White.

Love him <3 selfish, lonely fucker who was trapped but dragged Non and White into his hell with him.

Also have this TeeWhite edit to White Ferrari by Frank Ocean. "You say we're taller in another dimension" is truly ending me fuck

Fluke

Personally, I haven't heard much discussion about Fluke but he was the first character who I got really into because we started to get to know his personality in the earlier eps while he was alone in the house with White and taking care of Por.

I got into watching shows/series through Squid Game lol and the character that most compelled me there was Sangwoo, truly another dickhead and although they're not the same at all, I still found some similarities, such as their career-related status (Sangwoo being an SNU-graduate with a great job unlike most others there and Fluke's obsession with having a clean record to become a doctor), throwing their weight around (tricking Ali and being mean/scary to White), and just their selfish tendencies in general.

Fluke was overly concerned with his reputation and didn't want the new kids to know what happened 3 years ago with Non, which is what I first picked up on about his character before we got to the flashbacks. It was so selfish; people were worried about a life-and-death situation, but Fluke could only think about his future ambitions. I remember being extremely baffled at the end of episode 4 (I believe) when he points the gun at Tee, tells the walkie-talkie to not come, and then DESTROYS it, severing their connection to the outside world and leaving them trapped with a murderer/ghost/whatever. Just so that they don't become murder suspects for Por's death? girl, I don't understand your plan but you were clearly blinded by your greed for the future.

I love seeing selfish, cowardly characters, and Fluke certainly is one. He witnessed such crucial wrongs and misdoings against Non (Top breaking the camera which started the whole damn thing and Non recording the video which broke the camel's back) but never once spoke up. He said he didn't want to become "like [Non]" meaning he was protecting his own hide by making sure there was someone more bullyable present so that they didn't turn on him. A coward and a dick. In the end, I found it fitting that he had to gouge his eyes out.

Fluke didn't ever stand up to his friends or oppose them, but his cowardly ass was ordering White around while they were alone. Also, the bravado with which he wielded the gun in the later episodes, even taking White hostage and shooting Top, but once somebody else like Tee or Phee had the gun, he was cowering, rolled into a ball with his knees to his chest. Ah, the different ways he behaves when he thinks he has the upper hand vs when he's at somebody else's mercy!

Love him, what a useless character <3 Also, if you ever need to tell your secret but don't want it to get out, just tell Fluke to get it off your chest, that man is never saying a damn thing (even if it would save someone's life).

Anyway, that's that I guess. So many words here and none of it new but I needed to write all these words out, they were haunting me.

[letsdeconstructtogether]

Healing my low self-worth

I had to show my soul that I am worth good things

Your soul watches everything you do as well as how people treat you. You may think you're getting away with simply existing and taking everything that comes your way, but it sees what your hands do, and it will internalize it. I had to learn that yeah, although I can wear just a sweatpants and shirt, my soul is watching and it'll internalize that as 'I'm not that important, special, or worth the effort.' I now put in the effort into my hygiene, hair, and clothes as much as I can. It helped to grow the belief in me that I am worth good things. Give yourself good things. Buy yourself flowers, wear expensive perfume to bed, wear beautiful pajamas. Show yourself you're worth the best.

I had to walk away from situations that did not choose me

I thought that to rewrite the story that I was unchoosable, I would convince people who didn't choose me to change their minds. Now I know, in both friendships and relationships, I need to walk away from situations that do not choose me. If a friend keeps cancelling hangout plans, take that as a sign she is not interested in being my friend, and walk away. If, through signs, I realize I am not the woman in man's life, rather than convince him to choose me, I need to walk away. If I stay, my soul will continue to see these messages and internalize that 'Oh, I'm not worthy of good relationships, because look at how these people treat me'. I had to learn that how someone treats me is not a reflection of me, its just a reflection of what that person was going through in their life. I also had to learn that I needed to leave, to show my soul 'You're worthy of much more. You are loved, and I care about you. So much so I'm not going to have you stick around in these situations any longer.'

It's also a matter of building self respect. Recently, I've had to leave someone who I loved tremendously. I did it because, despite the love, being with them placed me through so much. I could see that while I loved him, I didn't like him. He has cheated on me, and by staying with him, I could feel my soul die, because it saw it didn't respect myself. So I internalized it as, well, I wasn't honorable or respectable. It wasn't his fault ultimately, it was mine, because by staying after the betrayal and signs, I essentially told myself 'This is what you're worthy of, crumbs.' I finally left, because I want good things in my life. So I need to show myself, despite the heartbreak, that I am worthy.

Final Step: I need to accept good things in my life

This is the step I am at. I grew up with the messaging that I was intrinsically weird due to my autism. And that it would essentially ostracize me for life. I lived in fear that people would notice, and once they did, they would treat me differently. And well, it's happened, many times. For other reasons as well, I believed I wasn't deserving of the best. That whatever blew my way was a blessing I should accept. So, in a weird way, when good things, such as people I really wanted to date, returned their feelings, I'd sabotage it. Because my soul believed 'I'm not worthy of the amazingly awesome things, I'm worthy of subpar things, things that don't scare me.' That crippling message led to me accepting subpar situation, which rotted my bones for years. I now feel deep pain in my bones and heart, and I'm tired of it. Tired of feeling like trash. I want to heal to stop the ache. And to do that, I need to finally stop accepting trashy situations, and accept the situations I do want. I need to change my attitude and self talk. I need to accept the good things in life, and face my fears.

I'm tired of it. I'm so tired of it. I ache, and I want it to stop. I want the good life, and I will get the good life. Because what's the point on wasting my one life on terrible friendships and relationships?

[foolsocracy]

Personally, I'm on the "Sam Prime has only one life" train because it makes far more sense why he's looking for ways to extend it mechanically if he only has the one than if he has three. A single life is a lot more volatile; one mistake could end it in a flash. Three gives you a little more leeway, so you can learn and live again. For someone to be so intricately entwined with death and escape from it, it feels symbolic to only have one life. (Plus Philza and Techno each only have one, and their relationships with death are Also incredibly entwined with that fact, so it just makes sense to me.)

REAL!! anon you're so real. let me speak on this

Only having one life is definitely much more of a motivator for Sam's clone shenanigans. And i also think it would be important to note that, from what I remember, most of Sam's raving about new bodies is about avoiding injury & outside forces that could kill you. I think he does mention bodies breaking down with age too, but I think it comes across as secondary when he talks about it. At least from what I can remember.

Only having one life also works well with the fact that he knew Phil from when Phil was much much younger (100s? 1000s? of years!). I'm pretty sure both Phil and Techno emphasize that them having one life has to do with where they are from, rather than who they are. Considering that Phil met Sam prior to Techno, and Phil and Techno being from the same place, its pretty likely that Sam is from there as well.

Another thing I'd like to mention is Sam Prime's reaction to waking up after being in a clone body for so long. It was a shocked, "I died." The way he says it isn't a way I'd expect someone who grew up aware that you can die and come back to life twice. And you may be thinking, maybe he's crazy delusional cause he's Sam and he's convinced himself that he can't die in a clone. And this is true. BUT! Boomer also has a very telling reaction. Its very much along the lines of you couldn't have died, you're right here! Now THIS is a sentence out of the mouth of someone who only has one shot at life.

now onto how Sam has died and behaved like a 3-heart character. Sam on the DSMP has no memory of being Sam Prime, and so he believes he's the same as any other person from the region, aka someone who has 3 lives. It could be fun to think that he might have incredibly repressed memories of his lives (or lack their of) when making sense of a comment he made back in the Trapped in Prison streams: he goes through Limbo to get back to his body in between deaths.

"but ryin! he was being metaphorical!" maybe! but what if he wasn't! makes you think. Perhaps if Sam's consciousness is in a clone body when that clone dies, he travels through some type of limbo where he can locate and return to his own original body, another clone, or even re-inhabit the same body that just died. DSMP Sam isn't even aware he has clones or an original body to get back to, so he just reanimates the old one.

Another comment on this Limbo --- Sam Bucket. It is widely agreed upon that Sam Bucket is another one of Sam's clones, and I believe the same. But there are a few things BBH has said about him that really stump me: 1) you can't touch him, 2) he can teleport, to an extent (as seen in the Sam Bucket finale). It's very... ghostly, no? Maybe the case with Sam Bucket was that when he died and was possessed by the Egg, he also lost that knowledge of how to successfully transfer back to another body. Or maybe it was because his conciseness wasn't only his anymore, that it couldn't fit back into his bodies right. So Sam Bucket could be an apparition of the consciousness that was in the Sam Bucket clone, and continues to haunt the Egg. The teleportation could be explained that way, as he doesn't need to adhere to the laws of physics; or maybe since he is so closely bonded with the Egg while being incorporeal, he's gained the Egg's ability to teleport.

Now for why he is suddenly back in his body after DSMP Sam's 2nd death. This one can go a lot of ways. Here're some ideas:

Going off of Sam Prime's shock of having died in a clone, perhaps Sam's Dream & Ponk deaths would be the first one's he'd ever experience. I also want to relate this to the 3-lives system as well, so maybe after 2 'deaths,' the more powerful 1-life Sam Prime had is reduced to an equivalent to a single 3-lives life. If that makes sense. With only one 'life' left, it is instinctively sent back to the original body to sustain it with what is left.

If we want to add the previously discussed Sam Bucket theory into this, here we go. It still makes sense that Sam Prime would not be aware that that body died, as his consciousness never returned to the original body to be added to the mix. Here, it would also help to think of the 1-life as split not into the one death, two deaths, sent back to body, like the previous scenario, but instead the clones can go through 3 'lives' before being forced back to Sam Prime.

Maybe the energy taken from the 1-life Sam Prime has isn't so easily split up into the 3-life system. It could be where energy is just drained over time, and the Ponk death was the straw that broke the camel's back. Its convenient, but possible. Also, it was the only death Sam had after he saw Sam Bucket. Maybe being exposed to his own consciousness triggered something in his head where it defaulted him back to Sam Prime? Who knows

Anyway, that was a lot of words to say Yeah, I like the 1-life Sam theory.

[lovinggreeniehours]

❤️💚🩵💜 with five? :D (@comfortingstars)

YAYY FIVE STUFF YAY (<– literally did a jump as i saw this)

❤️ how did they meet? was it love at first sight, immediate enemies, or something in between?

HEHE. HEHEHE

ehem im normal about pre relationship arifive i swear

okay um. first important information you need to know is that five can time travel! his power revolves around manipulation of time and space, but he hasn't had the chance to delve into that properly

so five ran away from home and time traveled forward to the future and found himself in 2019, aka the end of the world! and five is ultimately trapped there because he doesn't know the coordinates to travel backwards in time 😭 no he didn't think that through at all

so arifive met in the apocalypse. ari's power essentially doesn't let him die, and he can regenerate any damage his body takes no matter how bad it is. and that's how he survived the world burning down long enough to meet five :)

(ari's account looks a little different though. the thing about five and his family is that they're all superheroes, and essentially celebrities. they even have fictional character counterparts in the form of comic book characters. so. let's just say pre-apocalypse arion had a very clear favorite)

💚 do they both realize they have a crush early on, or does it take them forever to realize?

five is a blockhead so he just. forgot that was an option. he doesn't like calling it a crush anyway 😭 i guess it took him a while to register that he cared. but then after a few hours maximum of agonizing about it, he accepted it rather quickly. five doesn't like dwelling on things, so he's quick to just move on and adapt

as stated before, ari had like. a raging celebrity crush-ish on five before the apocalypse so the first few days were like. the most embarrassing moments of his life compiled lol um. he definitely knew he liked five, but it took him a bit to get over the fact that five was much more of an asshole than he thought he'd be 😭

🩵 do they both act different once they realize they’re falling for the other? maybe stuttering or fidgeting or daydreaming more often?

ari is just coping here okay 🫡 rip guy. f/o turned real. he's a bitch and you want to kick him sometimes. you still like him though. what now. i'd say he's doing fine. but five really doesn't understand how or why this guy seems so intent on helping him?? like okay?? weirdo (😭)

five discovered he had feelings and then confessed like 2 hours after that so yeah! i guess there was a change!! i guess!! i don't think i can imagine them changing so suddenly because they both affect each other so much over a gradual course of time though

💜 how do they confess? is it a grand gesture or in a more mundane moment?

something like both? maybe? it doesn't really look like a grand gesture to me, even though it probably is. it's just that the way they do it is really soft and quiet and all that,,ww

it's a culmination of their main conflict: five might have to leave him behind one day to return to the past and stop the end of the world. since arion would be considered an anomaly in the timeline, there might be consequences if they stayed together

the day five realizes that he just can't do that is the first time he sees ari having to heal from a major injury (he shielded five from an explosion). he won't die, he knows. but for a moment, he just wondered. what if. for a moment he tried imagining a world without him, and then that was it. he couldn't do that. so he told him. immediately. there wasn't really anything special about it. they just talked. like they always do. arion had his doubts at first. the last thing he wanted to do was cause five trouble (he's been trying to keep him alive all this time already, he cant let that go to waste) but if there was anything five was good at, it was proving people wrong. so if arion thought five was just going to leave him all alone in some barren wasteland like he wasn't worth a damn, then. well, i guess he was wrong? :')