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First Kiss (Race 3)
A strollonso AU where 18 year old rookie Lance Stroll falls helplessly in love with the notoriously mean world champion. (1.5k words, angst, hurt/comfort) [@v3lnys @biancathecool] {I was worried I wouldn't have motivation to write this but i got it done in one sitting LMAO}
last part - masterlist - next part
Thankfully Mark listened and stayed far away from him while the drivers were getting interviewed, leaving the rookie to just have to answer a few questions from smaller journalists.
It was nice to not be swarmed and just asked questions about his dad but he did wish he could've spoken to Fernando again before quali, seeing how much fun he seemed to be having with Mark.
Quali was decent, he got 7th so it wasn't anything spectacular but it was in the points. All he had to do was keep his spot or better and he'd count it as a good race
Before he could even reach Nico's side of the garage he heard a voice call him, though it wasn't the one he expected
"Alright, Stroll, you're the only one left" Mark announced, earning a groan fron the younger
"Mark please" He begged, not entirely serious but also not wanting to get interviewed anymore
"Fernando will but you dinner if you let me interview you" Lance wasn't one to turn down free dinner.
"What am I doing?" Fernando asked, finally reaching the garage
"Sure" Lance laughed, neither him nor Mark answering Fernandos question as the three of them left the paddock
By the time they reached a restaraunt Fernando had pieced together what exactly he was doing but he didn't really mind, the three of them had paid about the same amount while going around Australia together so it wouldn't kill him to treat the two to a little dinner.
They got seated not long after entering, Fernando and Mark in chairs while Lance sat across from them in the booth
"So, Lance. You ready for your interview?" Mark asked, having no plans on really interviewing him
"Shh," He said, bringing his finger to his lips "After Nando pays" Lance laughed, hoping Mark wasn't serious because the last thing he wanted to do after his second favourite part of the day, eating dinner (talking to Nando is first), is be interviewed.
Last nights dinner went well, Lance liked having friends, Karting had kept him from having too many growing up so having friends in F1 was a nice feeling, it gave him something to look forward to outside of the car.
Today was race day and all Lance wanted was to keep himself in the points.
He walked out of his drivers room, race suit tied around his waist (he couldn't be bothered to keep pulling it up), as usual Fernando somehow managed to completely ditch his garage and get away with it just to wish him good luck.
"Lancito, good luck today, let's see if we can get you on that podium, eh?" He smiled at him, elbowing him slightly
Lance loved seeing Fernando away from Media, he was completely different when the cameras were off, by this time in the season Lance had read the articles, seen the blogs, watched the interviews, people were convinced Fernando was some mean winning machine, he was a winning machine, yes, but the last thing he was was mean (at least to Lance.)
"Thank you, Nando, but don't be too hurt when I beat you" He flashed Fernando a cheeky grin, he wanted to beat him of course, all racers want to win, but a part of him knew that wouldn't happen
The cars all lined up and then started the formation lap, as it ended someone had already spun. Lance knew this was gonna be a hectic Grand Prix and it hadn't even started yet.
Lance stared anxiously at the lights ahead of him then everyone took off, the Australian Grand Prix had begun.
Nico was involved in a minor collision on the first lap with two other drivers, causing him to lose his rear wing, Lance was told over the radio that he was fine so he wasn't too worried, the two had gotten used to not finishing by now.
The safety car was deployed then recalled in two laps but then a driver crashed and it was deployed again. Lance was annoyed, why even bother to take it out if it was just gonna be out not even ten laps later.
They got about 20 laps in when cars started to pit and to Lance's surprise he took the lead, he was leading a Grand Prix, he heard instructions over his radio to take care of his tyres, with better cars coming back out with fresh ones he had to defend like his life depended on it.
He wasn't surprised when Fernando took back the lead, he wasnt sure why but he wasn't exactly mad about it either. He managed to build up a decent gap ahead of the driver behind him and asked if he should pit, he was advised not to so he stayed out.
On lap 32 there was another safety car, he took the chance to finally pit, getting into the pit lane first, the race starting behind the safety car again with him just behind Fernando, for the first time he had a chance to be on the podium with him, he was overjoyed at the idea, if his first podium was with Fernando he was sure it would he a memorable one.
On lap 35 the safety car was recalled but literally one lap later it was out again, they might as well have a safety car out all race at this point.
Two more cars retired after the last safety car was recalled and Lance made it to the final lap, he had managed to stay in 2nd for the past 34 laps, it was insane to him, his engineer tried not to say too much but it was obvious how excited he was for him, and now all he had to do was finish.
He had four corners left, then three, then two... then his engine blew. The car right behind him had been covered in oil and the safest thing to do was pull off the track, ten meters away from his first podium.
"I'm sorry- I'm so sorry, I was almost there, I'm so sorry, I'll try harder in San Marino-" He kept apologizing, wondering if he had made the right choice, wondering if the team would be mad at him
"Lance, It's okay, you're the driver, right? Do what you feel is best, if this is what's best then it's fine." His engineer consoled him, the canadian having a hard time not crying
He finally reached the garage, taking off his helment and his balaclava, his eyes red as he talked to his engineer at the back of his side of the garage, not noticing as the tears began to fall
"Fuck, Brad- I'm so sorry, I feel like i fucked up. I could've kept going, I should've, I almost got us a podium, I was so close." He gasped as he spoke, the Canadian distraught as he thought about his team being mad at him, what if he lost his seat because of this? The media already doesnt like him what would they say now? Was Brad lying about not caring?
"Lance, Lance it's okay, no one is mad at you for keeping yourself safe" He promised, speaking to the boy as if he was a child, which wasn't too far off
Lance couldn't respond, all he could do was cover his face, embarrassed at the reality of him sobbing after a DNF, he didn't care the other times.
Lance got himself together before Fernando came looking for him, not saying a word before dragging the rookie out of his garage
"Nando-" He started, Fernando moving them behind the Racing Point garage "Fernando what-"
Then he hugged him, without saying a word he just hugged him, arms tightly wrapped around the rookie as he sunk into his arms, unable to stop himself from crying again
"Fuck, Nando" He choked out "I feel so stupid"
"Shh, is okay, Lancito" He spoke softly, hand stroking the taller mans hair but at that moment the thing he felt was big. He was embarrassed, trying not to cringe at the reality of him crying in another mans arms but all that mattered was he felt safe in them "You did well, am so proud"
Lance hummed, sniffling as he kept his head in the crook of Fernandos neck "I'm sorry, Nando," He practically whispered "I wanted to be up there with you"
Fernando knew that, he was upset to hear Lance was no longer behind him, all he wanted was to celebrate with him, he was looking forward to it for the whole race and now he's stood there with the younger man a complete mess in his arms, he hoped San Marino would treat him better.
#f1#formula 1#formula one#strollonso#first kiss au#rpf#real person fiction#lance stroll#fernando alonso#1418#fernando alonso x lance stroll#idk if i like this#i feel like im moving too fast#idc tho#its my au :3#2006#f1 2006#renault#racing point#renault nando i miss you#renault nando and pink lance#the best bfs ever#even though they arent bfs yet#ff#fanfic
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she says he won't let her get a dog, which is fine, because they're in an apartment, and that's the kind of thing people say about their partners. he won't let me get a dog. and you're at a dinner party and you tilt your head a little to the side just like that dog he won't let her get, because is this the thing that's going to upset you? you don't know every corner of their relationship, she could be joking, they could have had so many healthy conversations about the dog, right, and maybe she's not letting herself get the dog because of money and time and whatever. but, like, she did say let
and she wants to move away from his hometown and he wants to stay and then he tells you with a wink and a conspiratorial stage whisper don't worry i'll convince her and she laughs about it - so clearly this is something they laugh about. but you do just stand there and stare at him like what the fuck, man. you can't say what you want to say which is why do you get the final say on everything because they're both obviously aware of the other person's stance on this and have obviously had private conversations about it and what are you going to do about it except make a scene and then he'll be mad at you and call you one of those bitches behind your back and she'll cut you off, which is a loss that doesn't feel worth it just because he makes you a little skeeved out every 3rd comment
and they both agree he just isn't the type to get flowers which is fine because everyone shows love differently, and are you really gonna judge someone based on their sense of individual relationship responsibility? maybe he's constantly cleaning her car and writing her poems and making her furniture or something. maybe she doesn't even like flowers and this is perfect, actually. and no you couldn't date him, obviously, ew; but like, she tells you she's happy. you almost send her a tiktok that says don't be 25 and the cool girl that doesn't need anything, you'll hate not getting flowers at 30, but that's like, starting drama & you shouldn't start drama needlessly.
and you're a little older than her but not so much older you can pull the whole trust me on this one babe thing and besides that wouldn't have worked anyway (when does it ever) and besides you have trauma so you and your therapist both agree that you're always looking for a problem even when there isn't one. and you tell yourself that just because you see them for 15 minutes every month does not mean you can identify every single red flag based on a single shitty half-joking(?) comment
and besides, what are you going to do? she says i actually wanted another stand mixer but thankfully he stops me when i'm about to spend too much money and you're standing there like are you okay? is this normal? is this just something people say? and again - what are you going to do?
to your therapist you try to language it - it's not, like, any of my business. but sometimes, doesn't it feel like - you should do something. there's got to be something, right? you've tried dropping little hints but they sail right through and you've tried having a single serious conversation and she got upset because why does it matter to you, yes it's different but we're happy, it doesn't need to make sense to you and you're like. really unwilling to push a boundary about it anymore; because the truth is that you know logically it shouldn't matter to you, as long as both parties are happy.
and besides, you've been wrong before. it's just... like, every time you see them both, something else happens, some kind of shiver down your spine like do you even hear each other when you talk. it's their strange, bickering orbit. just the way he's on his phone through dinner or watching sports instead of helping in the kitchen or, fuck, another one of these little throwaway comments he makes about we'll see about that, babe. she laughs when he calls her passions stupid shit and meanwhile she gets him tickets to see the knicks and he tells you well at least she's smart about something and still! it's none of your business.
you say get the dog anyway and she laughs. like, this is is you being funny. and not you saying - no really. get the dog. get the dog and get out of here. pack up and start running.
#this btw is not including toxic friendships this is legit just something ive experienced MANY times now#writeblr#you ever have a friend in one of those relationships where ur like#u don't HATE their partner explicitly#but ur like. what the fuck y'all#like the weird part of being an adult is that you can't be like . CERTAIN their relationship is toxic#and also if u move too fast or push too hard u can hurt someone who is already in a scary situation so you just are like#frozen there. laughing awkwardly. saying ''haha..... yeah..... couldn't be me....''#and like u can't tell - is this banter or does he actually think like. he's better than her.#all you can do is be there for your friend and hope they wake up to it#or ... that it really IS good#and it's just odd to you#tbh btw id rather have my friends feel safe coming to me if they have a concern about my relationship#like yes it's not ur business but it also IS bc im making u hang out with them and also ur my friend#it's a weird thing to experience as an adult bc it is such a blurry line and when u spend time#around couples that aren't like ACTUALLY ur friends but instead ''extended friend circle'' ur like#.... i don't know y'all well enough and he just called you a cow. and ur okay with that . and i don't know how to respond.#so ur like :) okay. um. go to couple's counselling i think#but also you are NOT supposed to pass judgement so it's like.... this weird limbo of feeling like you SHOULD say something#but knowing you CANNOT#idk that there's a way to resolve it!!!!!!!! it's probably a different approach person to person#edited my tags bc tumblr's new system fucked em up#PS EDIT: btw i should have said:#the pronouns in this can work in any and every direction. every gender and every sexuality and every#type of relationship tbh. even non-romantic relationships where ur like ''what do u mean ur bff calls u stupid''
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can we talk about this i feel like we didn't talk about this properly. the fact that dan owns a pair of tabi shoes haunts me. he probably has a pair of those iconic margiela tabi boots right
like these ones. dan stop being a coward bring out the tabis. i wanna see what he does with them
#im desensitized to them at this point lmao so i dont really look at them and go wtf any more#i know people will take the piss out of him for them bc a lot of ppl cant handle a shoe that isnt doc martens or chuck taylors#but i wanna see what he does with them. they are objectively ugly of course but that's part of the fun#i hope he got the heeled ones. 6'3 isn't even enough for my boy he deserves to be 6'6 minimum#next dress up video im calling it he wears these#or makes phil wear them#phan#dan and phil#dnp#i vaguely remember someone mentioning this when this video came out but idr who and i feel like we moved on too fast#if it was you plz let me know!
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Ishmael death stranding au stuff I was cooking. Also a faust kromer and Before team Ishmael doodle.
#bart#ishmael limbus company#ishmael lcb#limbus company#faust limbus company#faust lcb#i love the death stranding au already it itches my brain#im just trying to decide to give ishmael a bridge baby or not because i feel like she wouldn't really need it even though its recommended#i think she can see the beached stuff just fine#so no bridge baby mayhaps?#death stranding au ishmael is fucking amazing at traversing all the deteriorating shit shes a god at that#but the second you get Ishmael on solid flat ground that dosent move and she goes too fast shes going flat on her face#shes a lone courier who just runs around n shit#she also has a high lebel of dooms and has been GRAPPLED by bts so she just kinda looks fucked up#but shes damn good at delivering and taking corpses to the incinerators#might make a small makeshift comic about it actually#because i yearn to make ishmael speak i yearn for it#you ishmael likers i hope you trust me w this mission#do i have to tag project moon?#nah i dont bc i dont have the ability to stare at a wall for that long to type it out#just kidding i do!#project moon#im gonna makie this old woman say skibidi unironically(LIE)
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denethor is said to have been greatly affected by finduilas’ death, right. and i know their marriage was a political one but i like to believe that they still loved each other. not in the ‘traditional sense’ i guess but they loved each other’s spirits, their souls. the duty (as they viewed it) to protect their people & the willpower to do it, they both shared. and so i think that more precious than love, they understood each other perfectly. as no one else could, or did. i can’t stop thinking about denethor’s grief at losing her. to love someone, and to have them understand you, but to lose them so abruptly… no wonder denethor became embittered by her death. i think he became sad too. closed-off. built even more walls around him, not wanting to be seen as vulnerable by anyone. but his anger, at what (or whom), exactly? he already broke up with god when he was young. at the universe? at his fate? to have lost her so unfairly.
i came here to talk about their love & somewhere in the middle lost myself in his grief lol. never mind, bc what is grief if not love persevering????? they loved each other. i can’t. i CAN’T get over this simple truth. the love was there. it wouldn’t have been this tragic if there’s wasn’t. the love was there. and isn’t that enough (it isn’t. but it is. IT IS). the love was there. THE LOVE WAS. THERE. sobbing. truly sobbing DON’T TOUCH ME
#i’m spitballing here. but elbereth knows i spent hours in my bed thinking about them last night. i couldn’t sleep#i’m becoming so invested in them oh my god. ohmygod they’re making me c r a z y#wait. i was thinking abt how his relationship changed w his sons after this and waiiit. WAIT a minute#is this what writers feel like when inspiration strikes suddenly im going bonkers#there’s no connection between the next sentence and what i wrote till now. well there is but trust me on this one#my brain is moving too fast i don’t have time to be coherent#so listen. so it IS implied that faramir foresaw boromir’s coming. what if#what if DENETHOR dreamt of finduilas dying. i mean i’d rather he didn’t bc THEN there would be a lot of potential for angst and his self#destructive behaviour. what if denethor DIDN’T FORESEE HER DEATH. BUT WISHED THAT HE DID.#GOD. HIM WONDERING IF HE COULD HAVE SAVED HER. DONE SOMETHING SOONER TO PREVENT HER HEALTH FROM DETERIORATING#but no. nothing he could have done would have changed what happened. THAT’S WHY it’s a tragedy. but *he* doesn’t know that#denethor and finduilas#hmm.#DO U FEEL? DO U GET ME????????#denethor#finduilas
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from her pulse in my throat (aka my snowstorm/nordic winter vampire AU that has just... eaten my entire life), which updates on tuesdays!
oops! all weiss! a page of vampire! weiss drawings I did over the weekend, because I am so far ahead in this fic and so many scenes live rent free in my brain, that i couldn't help myself. i need to do an analogous sheet of just nora at this point. [image IDs in alt text]
fun fact! all but one of these is (currently) canon. another fun fact! all but one of these is happening before the end of hpimt. don't ask me how far i've plotted out. it's... so much.
#rwby weiss#weiss schnee#rwby fanart#rwby fic#rwby#snowstorm vampire au#kina draws#okay it's time to gush in the tags because i love all of these so much it took me way too long to draw these but im not really a fast-#digital artist so this was both fun and took a loooot out of me but still!!! so much fun with expressions and colors and poses#i think i like the studying one the best. i have a lot of feelings about that one for various reasons. but the funniest one is definitely#the one where's she TOTALLY fine lmaoooo#oh well. slow turn; slow burn baby!!!!!! taking my time gently torturing her. like a slow moving hurricaine.
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okayokay here are my Thoughts that no one asked for aljgdh
i LOVE bloom's boots and her wings!! the hair will definitely grow on me. i don't like her outfit though. i do see what they're going for! it's very reminiscent of her og magic winx and one of the earlier promo designs we saw but to me, this doesn't feel very,,, bloom. it's so sharp, there are so many angles and layers (which feels like the Theme rn for most of them). IF they're going for more of a dragon warrior vibe for her then i can def see it, but the stiff fabric just isn't doing it for me. i do like the shoulder guard look though! idk there are aspects i like and i can see the vision, but i'm hoping the final design is a bit more refined and feels more like Bloom
like i said before, aisha's design feels very one-note compared to the other girls and i think it's because she's basically wearing one color. i love that they put her in blue!! but i hope they introduce a secondary color like her og green or yellow/purple to help balance her out. as for the actual outfit, love the boots! it feels more believix to me but i concede that this transformation is meant to feel more modern so i'll deal. the actual outfit,,, not the Best. the cuts are interesting, there's a lot of symmetry which is weird to see on aisha since most of her transformations before were very asymmetrical. i'd love to see more flowy fabric with her! the little hip things just aren't doing it for me. i like her wings! but they do look a little too similar to bloom's for them to really stand out. i love the gold on them though!! AND HER HAIR >>>>> best part!!
LOVE musa's hair!! it's so cute i'm crying :') i feel like the hair is definitely a strong point of these designs!! i think the wings will grow on me once i see them in action. right now they feel a little awkward but i see the vision. i think so far musa's whole design is looking really good. Very similar to her og winx with just enough of a new change to not feel exactly the same. and her boots!!! LOVE seeing that more edgy side of musa reflected in her clothing! idk i think this is one of the stronger designs good for her!!
we didn't get to see the bottom half of stella's look so i'm not sure what that's going to be like! i love the sun ray collar but i will say it def feels more Fairy Warrior so,, i like it but i would want to see that reflected in the actual fighting and plot too. if it's not then it's not the Best design choice imo. her wings,,, like musa, i think they'll grow on me once i see them in action. it's lovely to see blue on her! not sure how i feel about the hair but since stella's ponytail is in her casual look instead, i understand why they didn't put it here too. i'm looking forward to seeing more of this design!
we also didn't get to see the lower half of tec's design so,, idk but i think it'll end up being pants going by the look of her boots? i don't Love the boots, but again, i see the vision and i do think it'll look better animated. her wings,, i like them but i would've liked to see a more interesting overall shape! the design on the inside is great, but tecna's wings were always sooo interesting and didn't feel like generic fairy wing shape. idk,,, we will see.... LOVE the hair, love the glowiness. it's like a solid 6/10 for me. i think there are certain things they could still play around with to enhance the design but it's going in the right direction
okay,, first, LOVE the braid!! she's finally beating the "never changes her hair" allegations good for her. and the little flowers in her hair are MWAH the wings are cute! they look good with the design. love the petals on the top! it def blends more and isn't as overwhelming as the previous design. the flower arm bands are also a classic. the skirt is really where it loses me. i like it In Theory - i understand the goal. it's very flowery, very much like petals, it reminds me a lot of a tulip. so i get it! However, the layers,,, idk man it just looks off to me
it Def looks better in action! it's not as stiff, the edges are going up, there's an overall more graceful, flowy vibe to it. but the layers,,,, i Get it but i don't love the execution. but to fair, i don't really know what would make it look better so maybe this is the best they could come up with
OVERALL, i do think it's going in the right direction in regard to pleasing old fans and appealing to newer, younger audiences! i do think a lot of the fabric looks really stiff rn But seeing flora's animated transformation is giving me hope that it will look better in the actual show. the 3D rendering just looks off when it's a standalone piece. so far, i think the best designs are musa's and flora's. they feel a lot more balanced, capture the winx vibe, And still feel true to the characters. imo the other designs are missing one or two of those elements.
bloom's design needs to feel more like bloom. aisha's needs more dimension. stella's is nice in theory but doesn't quite match her more carefree, fun-loving attitude and feels more like a Royal Warrior thing so it really depends on how she's being characterized i guess. tecna's is good but i want to see the whole thing lol also i think her wings should be more unique
Now. as for the casuals.
tecna looks great i think we can all agree on that!! very boss babe i love it!! aisha,,, i think her pants should be baggier. the tight fit and hip cuts just,,, i see the vision but i think they need to reel it in and make it more Aisha. stella's skin is way too light she looks sick. her outfit,,, Bad. her entire design just feels so pale and desaturated?? like just up the saturation on everything and it'll look ten times better even with the wacky outfit choice.
musa's is okay. i get the vibes - i understand the choices. but like aisha, i think her design could just use a little more thought. it's similar to her og outfit but kind of in the wrong way imo? like it has the same sort of look and cuts, but it's also tight and uncomfortable. musa's og look was very much about comfort over fashion so this feels a little,, hhhrrrrmmmm yknow? i do like the direction though! i think for me, it really is the top part. like why is she wearing a skin tight bodysuit. who told her that was comfortable for day to day wear. it's very much aesthetic over comfort which isn't Bad but it doesn't feel very s1 Musa yknow? she loved her baggy, comfy clothing for normal days
flora's is okay too. again, i like the direction. i don't love it as her Official One Casual Look for the season; i think i would've preferred it as a secondary look for one episode. but it's not the worst! it Is very flora so i concede lol
#long post#oh my#i think rn tecna and flora are tied for best overall looks for both#musa is a VERY close second/third. i just think her casual needs to be reassessed#the others just need to feel more like themselves for me to like it#clearly they are capable of that because Look at musa's and flora's transformations yknow?#i feel like theyre trying to keep stella being the fashionista but theyre also basing their knowledge on like#currently outdated tiktok trends#fashion trends are moving Really fast rn!! it's better to stick to a specific vibe for characters and not try to make it Too Modern#they will end up looking outdated lol#like the other girls kind of have those vibes but there's a lot more individual personality and hints of their og designs#that's Kind of there with stella like she has certainly worn dresses with that kind of fit before#but the entire thing as a whole just does Not feel stella#same with her transformation actually like i Get it but it's not Stella#at least not in s1 yknow? it feels a little too mature man we've been through a lot for a s1 transformation#same with bloom's! like it's Okay but it doesn't feel like a first transformation for a young fairy#and listen i dont hate the idea of their looks being more armor-like But that needs to be reflected in the fights and vibe of the show#AAGGGHHH idk maybe ill change my mind about bloom and stella's transformations once we see them animated#so many thoughts..#im gonna wait to speak on bloom's casual until we get a more clear shot of her!#But from what i could see it looks good lol very s1 bloom
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i need to be honest with you all i need to be on tumblr more
#reason being that tumblr is slower and calmer vs other soc meeds#tumblr is less addictive tbh#to be very blunt loll#but anyway even though we have more followers on twitter#its not a place to connect with people u less its for your front/reputation/business#f you REALLY want to connect with people your audience. i feel that tumblr is more friendly to that?#also we have longer posts. so i dont have to chop my language#people talk in replies and in tags and send asks#people on twitter move too fast#im still using twitter as one of our main fronts but guys…#we need to come back home to our roots for real#remember who i an#(half joke but no really )#am i making sense lol#like a prodigal son#from kris p#mod stuff#also unfortunately i still dont have new art to show ..#been super busy and super stressed !! but ill have a new Nyxus piece for you guys soon#after finals ill get back on commissions asap o7
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it’s just so nice to find someone that you instantly connect with … like you just know that you belong together. honestly electrifying as you begin to realize that they might just be your person who understands you on a deeper level than most and they know it’s the same for them too. I’m not the best with words but when you know it, you know it y’know? :P
#listening to tracy chapman and clairo as I think about them 😭#sharing my feelings has always been hard for me but like I NEED people to know#I know lesbians have the stereotype that they move too fast but#who tf cares. if the feelings are mutual just go for it 🗣️#🐑 if you see this (I know you will freak) im very happy we’re together <3
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Does the ps5 have to save clips of all my achievements this just makes me feel bad.
Im sorry The lilah.
#im so fucking back though. ive never played strive at a healthy framerate. its scary. testament shouldnt be moving this fast.#ANY girls want to come over and waych me fight cpus on normal difficulty…#maybe hard. maybe. i kind of dont like the ps5 controller its so fucking sensitive.#im always jumping around when i dont mean to. and i hold p on unholy diver like a fucking Millisecond too long. like 75% of the time.#and i dont liek where the joystick is… and i dont like using dpads like this#urgh……..#BUT ANYWAY YAYYYYYY…….#some life stuff going on rn but i feel better now. thank you gibby gear.#the kat goes meow#gg
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society moved on too quickly from furina's demo
#i think about the fontaine brawl that she imagined in her head sometimes like i feel like society needs more characters like that#ramblings!#also when she changes into pneuma form............ i've never seen something so fucking crisp in my life#the lights???? the music syncing?? it's like biting into a juicy apple cannot be topped#also the symbolism................... i was like 'hm. i actually dont really agree with that bilibili analysis video' after thinking it thr#through. <- also known as dumb behavior they almost predicted the entire 4.2 quest#tbh i feel like people also moved on too quickly from neuvis demo because that yellow field of grass is peak#i love when rando characters are dropped in the middle of nowhere contemplating existence#we also moved on too fast from ly.ney's story quest why do i keep seeing him in love with traveler#like his subtle threats to that woman... guys he's killed people dont make him just a flirt#dont mind me im just. replaying fontaine but in my head and via youtube trailers#actually something else is that while i still think most of the sumeru chars look a bit too much like they used skin bleach#the sequence right before nah.ida's burst where she's traveling through her own dreamscape is like. soo good im soooo....#references her character story... full of whimsy and elegance.. visiting children while asleep etc.. knowledge spreading something somethin#i also always liked how the 2 children floating in front of that window looked like they were guarding the gates of wisdom or smth#like sentries in front of a library. but theyre kids so its less somber and more like. idk joyful. house of learning open to all etc.#in a character trailer appreciation mood rn ig
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the styling of the cinematography this ep is just so beautiful and very much in theme
the colours, the depth, the perspectives, the reneissance-esque dramatic frames, the lighting.. everything is just SO beautiful
I love that they took a different approach for the direction of this ep to reflect on the theme which is art
#like most of it is shot very stylistically different to the other episodes#im loving every second of it#even though I feel like this episode is moving way too fast (not the pacing but just the ep feels strangely short for 5parts)#the sign
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#personal#ladies... its lovesickness on the menu again tn NDNNDNDNDMDMDNDMDMDMDM#god help me#i made it like 29 years without this. why now NFNDNDNNDNDNDNDMD#like ok im happy to be experiencing this in the sense that like... now ik what it feels like to really like someone#but man oh man is it... A Lot#and like maybe its this intense at any age. but idk..... it feels like So Much.....#and im freaking out bc i talk to my mom about it ok. and shes like oh ya that reminds me of how i felt with ur dad in the beginning n im#just... like ... o#bc my parents were like friends first and are like in Love love and have a v happy marriage so im just#the... Potential of having that n like oh god idk. i just dont know its all too much......#and im also like what if its all in my head. but then again like why is he waiting around for me n messaging me out of the blue.#i also caught him staring at me n looking away after i caught him. i just..... idk like i wanna Believe so bad but im so scared too........#im all over the place JDJDDMDMDMDMDMDMDNJDND#but i also am just..... i'll be patient .... bc rushing is no good#like idk. i feel like things have been Moving. and its not super fast but its a pace i can handle#bc ok say i Do ask him out or he asks me.... then oh fuck. then all the Scary things happen. like ok not scary#i dint think itd be scary with him#but idk.... physical... things. would start happening n like. id l9ve to hold his hand n like k___ him ok OK. but at the same time i just..#idk !!!!!!! im v shy !!!!!@@@@@ and ya. ....... idk 😭😭😭#like i like him so much that i think id want him to .... i just .. ya idk.#getting kind of ahead of myself here but what else is new
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happy new years eve to ppl who hate celebrating new years eve ^_^
#it's me !!!!!#i hate this day !!!!!!!#i know for some ppl it's a time for leaving everything behind and stuff but that exactly why i hate it .#not that im stuck in nostalgia or anything it's just i hate the feeling of everyone just ..... idk forgetting#i just feel like the world moves too fast sometimes and I Can't Keep Up .
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it always bugged me in movies when characters make like a blood pact with someone or a demon or something and they cut across their palm to get the blood 'cause it seemed like was a bit overkill and it also looked kinda painful but a few days ago i ended up doing that to myself in a very foolish woodworking accident (no demon pacts involved just me not being careful enough 😔 btw dont do woodworking at midnight) and lemme tell u i was RIGHT if u need blood for a demon pact DO NOT cut your hand it bleeds a lot and if u cut too deep or in the wrong spot your muscles get weird and nerves get all prickly and its hard to do so many things one handed I CANT imagine a demon pact would be worth it. just like i dunno. nosebleed on the summoning circle instead. respect yourself
#IM GOOD i didnt need stitches luckily. or maybe i mightve. but the emergency room was like a 10 hour wait so i used some like. medical glue#to glue it shut when it stopped bleeding after a few hours and got it checked out properly the next day when the doctors office was open LO#but yeah its healing fine! luckily im a very fast healer and i already have normal feeling back in most of my fingers#(the finger closest to the cut is still a little strange but it moves normal again and the pins and needles are almost gone!)#though sometimes i forget about the bandaged cut itself and put too much pressure on it and then im like#stock scream sound effect#but yeah we're good!! heed my advice dear followers: do not do any woodwork at midnight while being stressed out from deadlines and likely#intensely iron deficient from a combination of having chronic issues plus getting bloodwork done earlier in the day. <3#foolish woodworking accident indeed ghfhjhsklirjediufods
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i miss my friends tails
#* ooc: let's go lesbians!#negative cw#i'm going to bed bc the hashtag depression is getting to me today#but i miss all the people who i talked to for like a week straight all day and then never heard from again bc they moved on from hazbin#makes every new attempt at meeting someone and bonding with them feel. idk. feeble maybe?#and meanwhile i feel like i'm the one that's lacking bc i can't reply to threads as fast as i want to#and my drafts are just holding me down with guilt that i haven't answered them#mb i should go through and just get rid of all the answered asks i wanted to continue as threads but idk if it'll even make a difference#aaaaaaaaaaaaaa someone give me a lobotomy brain doing too much#not Really negative just. a bit sad. melancholy maybe. idk im going to bed irguejithk
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