#i feel like i've said all this before

[whetstonefires]

Fic writing asks: 17

17) What’s something you’ve learned about while doing research for a fic?

Hm. Ngl, it's relatively rare for me to do a lot of fic research. I'm much more likely to put something in a fic because I've read about it and have it on tap than to read about it because it's going to be in a fic.

Except ofc fandoms where you have to do research just to know what canon is and whether you're going to abide by it. Does that count? I know a lot of things about Batman because of fic research. I check equipment stats on the wiki when I include a specific object or class of object in a FFVII fic.

Mostly it's just, like, let's check the accuracy of this detail, or I'm interested in this subject now because I had to not get in too deep about it in that fic because I didn't know about it, but then later I can, because I looked it up.

One time as a teenager I put a white tern into a fic for poetic flavor when conveying that it was evening, and then before publishing the fic I googled their nest-building habits and it turned out they fucking don't.

They find a good spot where a tree divides and just. Balance the egg there. No nest. Notable for it.

Rather than choose a different bird I just edited that fun fact into the fic lmao. I will remember this fact about terns for my entire life due to my adolescent sense of rigor saving me from being very poetically and particularly Incorrect about a specific bird in public.

Not that anyone who read it was particularly likely to know better, but that just means I would have been promulgating false information.

I'm realizing I don't really separate what I've picked up as fic research from my nonfiction pleasure reading, most of the time. I've been reading on JSTOR about historical slavery in China lately because cdramas and cnovels use the subject for angst and drama, but tend to elide over any particulars they aren't using for the plot, and it's thousands of years of law and culture across a huge area, so there are no simple answers to be had. But that's not fic research it's just fic-related curiosity, iykwim?

Currently reading one about penal exile to servitude as publicly-owned, privately-allocated mostly-agricultural workers in Xinjiang under the Qing. It was one of the perks of being a military official in a recently conquered region, convict labor. Apparently they sent a lot of people convicted of Buddhist heresy to very specifically the desert parts of Xinjiang, because being a majority-Muslim region that China had at that time little interest in seriously colonizing, since it had limited agricultural value, Buddhist heresies would have a hard time spreading there.

Idek what illegal Buddhist opinions were, but I know that they got you sent to the region where China is currently persecuting the hell out of the Uyghurs.

But like this is not research for a fic; I am not going to set a mdzs fic in 18th century Xinjiang among the convict laborers. I would need to do so much more reading for that, and for what? To create an extremely realistic early-modern version of the Jin labor camp escape sequence in a Qing historical AU, with strange reverberations to an ongoing modern human rights crisis???

No. The work to reward ratio does not wash. Also yikes that is not my lane I would have to get it beyond reproach perfect to be comfortable sharing it.

I did have to very particularly research the layout of the White House for that Earth-3 fic where Talon!Dick breaks in and murders Grant Wilson, and then gets shot at by Adeline and chased out onto the Truman Balcony by President Slade with a sword.

I think I gave him a US Army cavalry saber because it was important that the President and First Lady charged out to fight the assassin attacking their kids in the Yellow Oval Room with the most American weapons possible. Adeline had an M-16 carbine.

I also learned fun facts about the history of the Truman Balcony, such as: President Truman economized on his household expenses to put aside enough to have the balcony installed without taking it out of his own actual pocket or having to ask Congress for a special renovation budget, and there was a huge hullabaloo and scandal about him doing this and the presumption and ruining the clean neoclassical lines of the building for all future generations of Americans and this was going to cost him reelection--and then they finished putting it in and it looked fine, actually, and the scandal collapsed.

I remember all this as a specific fic-research thing like 8 years later because I was researching the White House layout, the sightlines to the Truman Balcony (because Slade had to be correct in his assessment of how likely he was to get sniped), and military rifles all in a row and this seemed like a series of Google searches that might trip the hypothetical NSA bot monitoring my internet traffic and put a flag on me for maybe fantasizing about murdering the President.

It was still Obama back then so I wasn't in the slightest. Even though he is actually murdered later in that timeline.

Also speaking of President Obama, learned he said the Truman balcony was his family's favorite place in the White House, which is charming, because. That's just sitting out on the back porch. Like, it's on the White House and one story up, but it's just the porch sir.

Also the Yellow Oval Room has been redone a few times now but has had the same antique French furniture for decades now.

[snowddeong]

Society if mfs who fundamentally misunderstand itzy's music and only want to engage in bad faith discussions about the group never posted their itzy opinions onto the internet

And the thing is I don't think people should never have negative opinions about a group I like. As long as you're not hating the girls you're allowed to not like their music or concepts or whatever tf; everyone has groups they don’t like, that's normal. The issue is that there's so many people who don't like itzy (or maybe liked them at some point but never investigated why that is) that speak on them as if they get it but they really don’t 😭 cause how tf can you say "itzy lost their sound" when Cake is literally the most itzy ass itzy song since Dalla2.

Sneakers was a year ago, you don’t have to pretend every single song they've released since then is Sneakers as an excuse to post hate. Literally just move on lmao.

The most infuriating thing is that a year from now mfs are gonna go "I actually really liked cake this was their best title track why didn't ya'll stream" just like they did with Sneakers. If you're gonna hate itzy, at the bare minimum just acknowledge that's the point instead of making justifications that are so far removed from the actual reality of the group. You don’t have to call them flops, you don't have to say their music is "bad now", you don’t have to accuse them of losing the plot or pretend they're not talented lmao. Just say what you actually wanna say "I do not like this group" or "I didn't like this release". Not every opinion you have in kpop has to be a commentaryTM moment but especially not when you put in zero effort to actually form your own opinion on a group and just jump onto a hate train cause it validates your feelings about said group. It's okay to just not like something.

The thing a lot of people don’t understand about good critique is that your approach is so fucking important. You CAN talk about shit that you hate and not be a fucking weirdo about it if your intent is to actually understand why it is you have the feelings you have or what it is that something has done you feel coulda been done differently. If you're not genuinely dissecting the subject and your feelings about said subject then that's not criticism, that's a hate comment lmao.

[astradyke]

warning this might be a nothing post i'm just a little emotional & rambling but like... i think a lot about hometown showdown and gay and not proud a lot. and i understand this was in the peak of YouTube's fuckery with Dan and disrupting his plans for DINOK so i understand there's like a tension behind a lot of what was ongoing. i also realize that YouTube-- more obviously with hometown showdown-- but generally had strong business rationale for wanting Phil to feature in these videos, with Dan & Phil being the duo of HS and Phil being there in gay and not proud (sorry the acronym for this looks ugly).

but man... i think a lot about how hometown showdown was just kind of a lot of dates. i've not seen the other ones but i hear a lot that they were way more competitive versus Dan and Phil were just casually exploring their hometowns together, showing pieces of themselves to the other. i think about all the dialogue that was cut (that I think was alluded to in WDAPTEO 2?)

and i think about like. the seismic Importance of Phil being in gay and not proud as like... Dan's safe space. the same way he's remote crisis manager, the same way he was part of WAD's pre & post show, the same way he filmed that haircut video basically to promo YWGTTN and Dan is leaving me to talk about WAD. the same way that Dan got a taxi to his place after his nightmare experience at the laundromat to do laundry because "for the first time since I was a tiny child, I actually felt safe."

and after the latest mukbang it's like... it's really insane to me how their personal relationship has continued despite the pressures they've faced as being a comedic influencer duo. the fact that they work as business partners but still have this relationship. the fact that even in these YouTube originals that Dan was resentful of at the time anyway you can still glowingly see how much they love each other. like Phil being in gay and not proud wasn't a cameo, it was a fucking love confession.

i dunno. this is something that's been talked about a Lot but i do think about it frequently. i don't tend to rewatch these specials a lot because Jesus Christ the editing really gets me, but like... idk. "you're next to me in my life," or whatever. 15 years have passed and Phil's still cheerleading for Dan, from his first YouTube video to his first solo tour. i dunno.

[vicioustoker]

stumbling onto the penumbra randomly four years ago and falling in love so ridiculously fast with juno as a character when i was struggling so much and couldn't see any way out & seeing juno go through the exact same vs getting to now, at a point where i'm significantly better and trying my best & seeing juno better than he could ever be, ending his story on such a good hopeful note and knowing that we'll be just fine

[lunarharp]

What led to this (orufrey comic, cw an uncomfortable/creepy scene)

[sskk-manifesto]

Bungou Stray Dogs: Dead Apple and how “ability users” (opposite to “normal people”) learning to accept themselves through the acceptance of their own abilities is a queer metaphor of acceptance of own's sexual orientation and gender: an essay by me

[6vaguebook]

After watching this first two episodes of the Percy Jackson Disney+ show, my main takeaway (outside of Percy taking on THREE Ares kids with no training and not even being wet) is that Luke was done so, so well.

The actor EMBODIES him. Even before I saw him acting, one picture was enough to convince me that this man WAS Luke, despite looking nothing like him. His friendship with Percy feels so much stronger. I'm already feeling the devastation from the inevitable betrayal. Just. He's so well done.

[tyriongirl]

Genesis 4:1-5, translated by S. R. Driver, from The Book of Genesis, 1905

A Clash of Kings, Prologue - Maester Cressen

Emanuel Krescenc Liška – Cain (1885)

Claus Westermann, Genesis : a commentary, 1984

Arthur Segal - Kain und Abel (1918)

A Clash of Kings, Prologue - Maester Cressen

Natalie Diaz, A Brother Named Gethsemane, from When My Brother Was an Aztec

Lovis Corinth - Kain (1917)

Genesis 4:6-9, translated by S. R. Driver, from The Book of Genesis, 1905

A Clash of Kings, Chapter 33 - Catelyn IV

Odilion Redon - Cain and Abel (1886)

A Clash of Kings, Chapter 33 - Catelyn IV

Genesis 4:9-14, translated by S. R. Driver, from The Book of Genesis, 1905

A Clash of Kings, Chapter 31 - Catelyn III

St. Omer, Benedictine Abbey of St. Bertin; c. 1190-1200

A Storm of Swords, Chapter 36 - Davos V

S.R. Driver, The Book of Genesis, 1905

A Clash of Kings, Chapter 42 - Davos II

Lazzaro Pisani - Death of Abel (1885)

S.R. Driver, The Book of Genesis, 1905

A Clash of Kings, Chapter 42 - Davos II

A Clash of Kings, Chapter 42 - Davos II

Cain and Abel - City of Zeven - 2015 (source)

Genesis 4:14-16, translated by S. R. Driver, from The Book of Genesis, 1905

[anjasitdown]

I knew something was UP when the only film that helped Yuuji control his flow of cursed energy was the Lord of the Rings. Our boy Yuuji is TRULY a hobbit at heart. Chapter 265 spoilers ahead, but I'll put it under the cut.

It was back in season 1 when Gojo had Yuuji watch a variety of movies to teach him control of cursed energy regardless of the emotions evoked by the films. Gojo refuted Yuuji's idea that anger and other strong negative emotions are the only source of a strong cursed energy.

With that in mind, I don't think it's random that LotR is the one shown to us that helped Yuuji gain mastery over his cursed energy flow. Sure, Yuuji might've controlled it before watching other movies, but it feels as if it's on purpose that it's LotR, especially that scene at the river where Frodo tried to take the burden of destroying the ring on his own, fully aware of the dangerous journey ahead. But Sam didn't let him and willingly followed him, even if it would cost him his life.

Maybe, just maybe, Yuuji learned to control his cursed energy because he saw himself in Frodo. Yuuji looked so engrossed in the film as if he was feeling it—as if he was Frodo who, just like him, bears great evil within him. Not only that, but Yuuji saw in Frodo's eyes the same crushing weight of responsibility and isolation such an evilness entails. It was as if he's looking in the mirror. But Frodo wasn't alone. He had Sam and the others in the Fellowship who are also willing to lighten the burden he carries. And I think that's what got to Yuuji.

And I don't know if it's just me reading too much into things but Yuuji is at his best when he feels anchored by his friends' support or when they're relying on him, like that time when Yuuji held down the cursed spirit at the detention center to buy Megumi time to save Nobara and escape; when Yuuji and Todo almost defeated Hanami, and my favorite, when Nobara nailed down Mahito's double during Shibuya arc:

As corny as this sounds, Yuuji managed to pull himself from Nanamin's death and attack Mahito because he felt Nobara's presence, which encouraged him to continue fighting. Even if the sorcerers were scattered that time and most were left to fend for themselves, Yuuji didn't feel alone. This was the one thing Geto needed the most when he was spiraling down.

Yuuji reminds me so much of Frodo: Yuuji the vessel of the evilest sorcerer in history and Frodo the Ring bearer. But before that, they were nobodies living a simple life, which they treasure and work hard to keep. They're not ambitious and are satisfied being surrounded by their loved ones. They're the ones we least expect to defeat the evilest entities since they're surrounded by the strongest warriors/sorcerers, who could not defeat the said evilest entities. Yuuji, like Frodo, does not belong to the kind of world he got thrown into, and this is made pretty obvious in the recent chapter.

Throughout the many months Yuji had been with various sorcerers and curse users, his principles and worldview got blurry. He started to assimilate their ideas, which didn't feel like him to be honest. From ideas of having a specific role in life and fulfilling it, wanting to give people a good death, and having a cog mentality to being the same as Mahito and becoming a monster to defeat another monster. That's not him. That's never him. And Yuuji realized that too, and I love seeing him change his perspective into that which feels more like him.

Yuuji never liked fighting others. He may have been blessed with physical prowess that might've been on par with Nanamin, but he never wanted to use it. Heck, Yuuji joined an occult club instead of becoming an athlete. What's important to him are the memories you make with yourself and with your loved ones—choosing to do things, even mundane ones, that bring you and others joy because that's what life is all about.

To Yuuji, there's nothing wrong if you lead a simple life doing things as mundane as walking your dog, sleeping, taking a shit, writing this meta, and existing. Living day to day is already hard as it is. Yuuji wants Sukuna (and us) to know that your worth to live and be loved and respected doesn't depend on the grand dreams you have, how far you've come in life, how powerful and strong you've become, how useful you are. Your worth to live is inherent to you, and no one's going to change that, not Sukuna or anybody else. And Yuuji's not gonna stand idly by and watch the likes of him trample on people's lives. They don't get to choose who's worthy to live and kill those who don't.

I read somewhere that Gege thinks Yuuji having no ambition, unlike Naruto wanting to be a Hokage or Luffy aiming to become a Pirate King, is the story's weak point. But I disagree. That's what makes Yuuji so unique and refreshing to watch as he develops. He may not be as ambitious as other shonen heroes, but he does have a strong moral compass, even as young as 15. It may not be obvious, but Yuuji is introspective, observant, and most of all he has this childlike love for life that the other characters have lost due to the nature of their jobs.

Back to the LotR reference—as much as similar Yuuji is to Frodo—when Sukuna switched to Megumi, Yuuji started to feel more like Sam and Megumi Frodo. No matter what happens, even if it would cost him his life, Yuuji's never gonna leave Megumi alone in despair. Megumi has become weak in mind and spirit that he's possibly on the verge of giving everything up. Still, Yuuji's not going to give up on him. He will destroy Sukuna and carry Megumi back home.

In the end, if Yuuji survives, all I could ever think of is his eyes full of insurmountable despair and mourning over the lives of the people he loved and lost. There's no going back after this. I can only hope that after the end of this story, Yuuji could still find a way to rest—be with a person or in a place—if there is anyone or anything left at all.

[butterflysonnets]

yes i'm rooting for m*leven breakup because byler is neat but mostly? i'm rooting for m*leven breakup for the sake of el and mike.

to me, their romance was always a puppy love born out of a combination of social pressures, naïve curiosity, and a lack of true understanding regarding intimacy and romantic love and what it really is. it was real in that they do truly, deeply care about each other and they are close friends, maybe even shared an attraction, but a maturing romance is so much more than that. they've grown up and out of being boyfriend/girlfriend, and that's okay! i think television/film needs to show more often that most of us don't have definite "soulmates" or first childhood loves that we spend our whole lives with. it doesn't mean these relationships meant nothing and didn't impact us, it just means they've run their course and that something else is in the cards, and this is part of life!

i've always felt el was at her best and most confident self when broken up with mike, discovering who she was and what she liked alongside another girl her age instead of just relying on mike for mentorship on how to live in the real world. she deserves more of an opportunity to find herself, her autonomy, and her independence, and to love who she is, and she's made it clear she's felt insecure in the relationship with mike because she isn't being loved and understood the way she wants, needs, and deserves from someone who is her partner.

also, it's okay if mike doesn't love her in "the way he should". he is not obligated to love her romantically and stay in a relationship with her just because she's a girl, because she "needed someone", or because he cares about her a lot. he shouldn't be pressured into a romance if it's not truly coming from his heart. he deserves freedom to find out and honour who he is, too, instead of just staying in his non-functional first relationship — one he got into as a child, essentially — and defining himself that way because it's what's expected when a boy and a girl are close. he loves her in some way, yes, but it's okay if he doesn't feel comfortable or secure being her boyfriend anymore, for whatever reason that is. he's felt insecure too, and that's valid and it matters.

they are their own people and are steadily growing and changing every day. they need time to figure out who those people are, and it's become clear (at least in my opinion) that those people aren't meant to be a couple at this stage.

they deserve freedom. they deserve to grow up and be authentic to themselves and not feel like they need to lie for the sake of a relationship. they deserve to move on from this version of their relationship that isn't making them happy and rekindle the best part of their bond: their strong, beautiful friendship. they don't have to be a couple if it doesn't make them stronger and better and happier people.

i think it would be healthy and wonderful for a show, especially one consumed frequently by young adults, to show a relationship starting, progressing, and ending on good terms in this way. sometimes things don't work out, and that is okay.

[dariusaurs]

i think dinostar is such an interesting ship right now even if i've kind of turned away from it after this season. the problem is that it's complicated, and fandoms historically don't like nuanced situations or takes. i don't think it's fair to say darius is putting brooklynn on a pedestal, since from his perspective, she hasn't done anything wrong, and kenji has been framed as this unfair partner to her. it does feel like his feelings are very immature and more of an infatuation right now ("if he loved you half as much.."/"unless?"), especially when you compare them to kenji's own feelings for brooklynn - his girlfriend who he's loved for 6 years - but that isn't a horrible thing, it's just different. i do completely understand if people dislike the ship right now, and even criticize darius' way of handling the accidental confession, but i just think people have been way too harsh on all three of them without being willing to see that all of their perspectives are different

[blackhholes]

teen wolf meme: [4/6] creatures -> chimeras

You found the perfect word, though, Scott... Because a Chimera isn't just a monster with different parts. It can also mean something impossible to achieve. An unrealizable dream.

[solarpunkani]

Psst, hey.

Hey you.

Come closer.

Listen to what I'm about to say good and well, alright?

[beatx-mavie-archangelx]

there should've been at least a full view of Fíli's body in the funeral scene

"Fíli you didn't deserve any of this" we all say in unison

[wombywoo]

any chance you'd be willing to draw some könig/ghost content? 👉👈

hahah, I'm sorry, but...no 😅

[sciderman]

I swear I have read your big post regarding Peter Parker's neurodivergence and why it is best to avoid labelling him, but he definitely has a weird brain

Can't find it and feel kinda sad about it cuz I deeply related to it

i know exactly which post you're talking about and i can't find it either! i've raked through my archive, and it's just - nowhere to be seen. i think tumblr eated it (it happens.)

really, tumblr's search functionality is so so useless, i don't know what to tell you. there are plenty of keywords i can search to find it that post, but the search functionality actually just does not work!

undiagnosed audhd-addled peter parker, my darling, my light, my life, my everything.

i think peter parker's such an interesting creature to write, because a lot of people will point to a certain behaviour about him and say "this is an autistic thing, right?" but a lot of those behaviours are actually, in my head, tied to certain traumas in peter's life too.

people say "oh, the food thing, peter's a picky eater because he's autistic" and yes, absolutely. but also it's tied to his trauma with his parents.

peter gets overstimulated, and yes, it's an autism thing, but also he was bitten by a radioactive spider and his senses are dialled to 11.

it's a similar case i've found for myself, too – where a lot of friends i have kind of diagnose me because i have autistic traits, but actually - i'm hesitant to claim the label or pursue diagnosis because, actually, i know where these certain behaviours come from, and they come from certain traumas. there are events i can pinpoint in my life and say "yep. that's where this behaviour comes from."

so - i think there's a lot of overlap between trauma and autistic traits. the brain is very complex! i think the reason for that overlap is maybe as simple as the fact that people with autism and people with trauma are both doing the same thing - developing behaviours to protect themselves or soothe themselves. so - i think it's nice to be able to see a character like peter parker, who may or may not be autistic, but recognise behaviours in him and see yourself in him.

people who go undiagnosed for whatever reason - people who are really good at masking - so good, in fact, that they have no idea they might be on the spectrum - everyone and anyone at all can look at peter parker and recognise themselves. because i think we discredit the thought that every single brain does the same thing! develops certain behaviours in order to survive. every brain has that same software - we've just all been faced with different hardships that we need to overcome, and that's were all the differences come in.

autism is a spectrum, i guess - everyone falls into it to some degree. and i think events in your life probably push you along on it. but i don't know, i didn't study brain science. probably what i'm saying is very stupid and uninformed. of course there's brain chemistry involved. but i know people in my life living with autism and certain events in their life have exacerbated certain behaviours or made coping with it a lot more difficult. so maybe trauma is a catalyst.