#i feel happy in a sick way
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dissociation go brrr
#hi my name is. mentally unstable#i feel happy in a sick way#even tho the reasons im happy are healthy#the actual emotion feels. too much. too much. like.#i cant explain it#its like when a cake is too sweet#like yes its food its good to eat and its yummy but its also too sweet#so you dont wanna eat too much of it but#like i cant just Turn Off my emotions ykno??#-_-#julian rants#vent
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Act I ~ The Prince
A tapestry for Let No One Sleep by @azalawa-scroggs on ao3
#narumitsu#wrightworth#phoenix wright#miles edgeworth#nmbb24#happy nrmt big bang!!! there are two more of these…..#but you’ll have to wait for them#fan art#aa#ace attorney#dick gumshoe#maya fey#manfred von karma#…bro is creeping…#wHEEWWWW ok took me a bazillion years to catch up with my day but HERE ARE MY THOUGHTS ON THIS ONE:#the border is intended to be read in counter clockwise direction#so: top -> left -> bottom -> right#and YES the sun and the moon are intentionally associated with the attorney's and prosecutor's badges respectively#phoenix and miles are our sun and moon throughout this story so be sure to look for that in the fic too!!#this style was very experimental for me but i wanted it to mimic the feeling of a tapestry hence me referring to it that way#i WISH this was fabric that would be sick as fuck#i will eventually share a proper breakdown of the thoughts and intentions behind everything but for now...#im gonna miss Phoenix’s cloak bc im obsessed with the design actually. wish that thing was real too#miles is my cunty little bitchboy in this wearing his thousand pound fur coat and the suitor stompy boots#if you thought that was a rug and went Oh. ...that was on purpose :^)))))#rendevok#id in alt text
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what was the point of lila thinking home was a feeling she didn't deserve and could never earn until she found diego. what was the point of them finding deep, meaningful love in each other. what was the point of lila opening her heart and confessing that all she really wanted was a family with him.
what was the point of developing diego and lila over two seasons, creating such a beautiful, chaotic bond, just to destroy it for no reason.
#the umbrella academy#diego x lila#lila pitts#diego hargreeves#what was the point!!!!!!#isn't it great when there's no character resolution and everyone just gets erased from existence#instead of giving us emotional closure they just added more pain and trauma and called it a day#what was it all for exactly. to give the handler a peaceful happy life of all people#don't even get me started on the bracelet or that awful pointless love triangle#steve blackman is gross and so is the way he talks about lila like she's not even a character in her own right but just an afterthought#someone who was there to pair with five while diminishing all that she is#five needed a love story so they just shoved lila into that role as if she were some random accessory to five's story#rather than her own character with thoughts and feelings#a woman's entire character arc is ruined just to give a guy a love interest#i feel sick#i've already mentioned some of this on twitter but whatever#as you can probably guess i'm not going to gif this so-called new season#lila deserved better. diego deserved better. we deserved better
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AGH happy (definitely-not-late) bday to mr jamil viper 💖🐍 and thank u harveston jamil for coming home as well as two of his bday cards 💖💥
#i put WAY too much effort into this and;; i dont even like it 100% 😭#i gave up on the patterns </3#but anyways#thank u jamil for ruining my life ily#also happy holidays everyone (it’s literally still back-to-school season)#actually technically it's already christmas in the philippines#so uhhh#it fits???#thank u harveston sledathon for the perfect timing#[—✦-#-✧ my art#twst#twisted wonderland#twst art#jamil viper#harveston sledathon#-✦—]#also also i havent??? posted art in almost a week???#das crazyyy#i got sick the day after his bday when i was supposed to be finishing up his art >:[#then i just lost all energy for a bit i couldnt do anything 😭#anyways it’s like. 4am i cant sleep#so i decided to just finish up his bday art 😤#who knew drinking thai boba milk tea at 5pm wouldnt be such a good idea#i feel like i’m unnecessarily rambling more than usual lmao sorry 😭
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aughhh im so late but i hope everyone has been enjoying pride month! huzzah!! gay people!!!
i had to rush this one out since ive been busy with other things,but i just couldnt miss out on drawing juza this month, since hes such an important character to me, for so many reasons! <3
#i had planned to work on this early june but i got sick +i have not been the best but yknow what im happy with it!#also woooo first juza post here no way#(is it even juza anymore?? like...my version is probably too different) (sweats nervously) anyways#went with the pink+white combo since that was one of my first juza posts that i feel really awakened something within me#by that i mean now i basically only draw him being yass and honestly? slayed the house down#anyways anyways on to the actual tags uagh aughhhh then im going back to my cave to prepare for artfight#a3 fanart#a3!#a3! act addict actors#a3! game#a3! fanart#act addict actors#juza hyodo#a3! juza#hyodo juza#a3 act addict actors#a3! art#a3! mankai company#autumn troupe#unculturedswine69#sheetzking
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no children
Nightmare belongs to Joku Cross belongs to Jakei
#undertale#utmv#undertale au#nightmare sans#cross sans#crossmare#nightcross#crightmoss#i should be studying for my finals...#but nooooo instead im thinking about evil doomed skeleton yaoi#crossmare on the mind 24/7 it's actually sick#anyway...#normally i like to hc them as disgustingly sweet to each other#but i like to indulge in the angst every now#i like to think that nm develops this one-sided obsession with cross cause he sees that cross is just as fucked up as him#and in some way he's really happy to find someone else who is just as miserable as him#cause nm finds comfort in the fact that there is someone else who is drowning in their own misery alongside with him#so nm refuses to let go of cross because if he does then that means that cross will heal from his trauma and leave him#and nm will just go back to being miserable by himself again#but that's just my sick and twisted interpretation of their dynamic#and i just really love the idea of nm having an unhealthy obsession with trying to find comfort in other people's misery#because it makes him feel less lonely#misery loves company as they say#teehee#ceci art
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— OLIVIA GATWOOD
#dwedit#rtdedit#doctor who#dw#dwgif#doctor x rose#ten x rose#tenrose#tenth doctor#rose tyler#otpsource#romancegifs#userdiana#usertix#useraurore#userlanie#usertom#i'm sorry about this. but it's rtd who is sick in the head not me#how does this still make me SICK all these years later + they had a happy ending?#i don't even know it's just so. like i feel it in my BODY lol the way they can't touch is so. eough
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#look at him so happy in his little torture box :) home sweet home….. I see nothing wrong with this whatsoever…#this is fiiiiiiine…… I was gonna wait to post this but… it reflects my current mood so..#dsmp memes#dsmp meme#c!dream#y’all knew I had to do it… it’s just my fav meme… like ‘this is fine’ should be written on my tombstone#prison arc#dream smp#dreblr#dsmpblr#this is fine#dsmp#pandora's vault#no one does it like c!dream#I spent way to long on these memes btw… I have over 1000 Minecraft photos on my phone now…#not me getting sick when I’m supposed to be going to a concert on Wednesday and beach this weekend…. let’s all just hope I feel better#tomorrow 🤞 pleeeeeaase….
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Republican Green Day fans just now realising American Idiot is about them has gotta be the funniest thing i've ever fucking seen. like my guy they are a pop punk band. they be popping and punking. they've BEEN popping and punking. who the fuck did u think they were talking about????????
#like what the fuck#how?????? how do u listen to American Idiot and know the lyrics and not go oh yeah no way these guys voted trump#media literacy please i'm begging u :')#context#Billy Joe recently held up a Trump mask with idiot written on it in a performance#and now Republican fans are like noooo!!!!!!! we're gonna boycott!!!!!!!!!!#ok?#good?#i wouldn't even necessarily call myself a Green Day fan i just like some of their songs and think they're cool#but i guarantee no one is complaining lmao like we don't want u here either dude boycott away#what did u THINK a punk was#certainly Green Day don't care that they're boycotting they're probably happy!!!!#i'd feel sick to my fucking stomach if my art was enjoyed by Republicans and i'm so serious#i make my art so that it makes conservatives uncomfortable and SO DO THEY#they literally could not have been more obvious if they tried what the fuck
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sometimes i listen to 'the view between villages' and i wonder if oikawa feels resentment when he goes home to japan
#he steps foot in miyagi and all the sudden he's 17 again#he feels the phantom ache of the growing pains he used to get when he hit his growth spurt in first year#remembers the way his uniform blazer smelled when his mom had just washed it#can hear the sound of the bell at seijoh that rang between classes#and he gets a terrible sick feeling in his stomach#because more than anything he remembers the optimism he had about the future and what was in store for him#and he's happy now in argentina. he is. genuinely.#but he also loves his home more than anything#and there will always be a part of him that can never forgive the fact that he had to leave it just to follow his dream#basically i encourage you to listen to 01:47 onward of the view between villages and suffer with me
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okay something ive been curious about is how people feel about their self harm scars. because mine are really important to me and I honestly feel love for them, and i enjoy when they are visible.
also this includes people who have any kind of permenant mark from self harm. and tbh if you have only self harmed in a way that leaves temporary marks then feel free to answer this too, or if you used to have some but now they aren't visible
#also this is not bc i get a lot of compliments on them#lord knows almost every member of family has said Something about them & my mother made me cry the first time she saw them#but they are important to me and i feel comforted by them#they feel like something very personal & smth thats truly my own#i absolutely do not blame people for having any sort of reaction towards theirs#my cousin has been getting his covered by REALLY fucking sick tattoos n im very happy for him#im just curious bc i dont feel like ive ever seen someone talk about their relationship w their scars in a way that feels similar to mine#m.#self harm tw
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Part of me wants Gojo to go through on Yuji’s execution part by the end of the story.
Like, don’t get me wrong, I adore Yuji. And I want him to be happy. But Gojo and him just harmonize so interestingly in that they match each other’s energy that it would make the angst even more exquisite.
So excuse me while I’m off sitting in a corner, contemplating an ending where Gojo kills our pure and innocent sunshine boy, and then absolutely loses his mind in the wake of it because, good god, duty wasn’t worth Yuji’s life.
#pointless rambling#some thoughts#because I’m watching the part where Gojo is currently teaching Yuji#and i’m in shambles over how alike they are in some ways yet totally different#it’s like soft sunshine and chaotic solar burst#polar opposites but still somehow the same?#and just— I want Gojo realizing what it actually MEANS that he’ll have to kill Yuji#give me Gojo towering over Yuji on the day of his execution and having a full blown meltdown because he CANT#but Yuji our sweet sunshine would probably just be happy he’s not alone when he dies#I want Gojo to feel sick with the realization of it#urgh I need more fics#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#yuji itadori#gojo satoru#itadori yuji#satoru gojo#jjk itadori#angst#musings
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I still think "my mind is a safe and if I keep it, then we all get rich. my body is an orphanage we take everyone in" is one of the rawest most fucked up lyrics pete has ever written that then got put into a song.
like srsly 27 is such a fucked up song, specially if you put it in the context of when folie came out
#like i don't have the words in english to explain it but??? thinking you'll get rich as long as you keep the mess in your mind locked there?#feeling like you're just a body taking people under your care? but not getting it back? feeling used in a way???#and then patrick choose to follow it up with 'doing lines of dust and sweat off last night stage just to feel like you'???#the parallel between drugs and having a bit of the person you want but can't have?? the recognition of the self in the other???#like you can just inyect a person in you like a drug and be them and feel like them/happy? the I shoot the sunshine in my veins of all it???#INSANE. THEY WERE SICK FOR DOING THIS SONG
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Hey guys!! Sorry for being gone for a while, but I really needed a little break and my vacation was super refreshing, I had an awesome time with my partner and visiting my best friend.
Still not sure how high my engagement will be here but I'll probably be around a little bit more!
#jane journals#ive had a post in the drafts for a while so maybe ill post that before i get on my first flight home#its gonna be grueling but ill be happy when we're back in our own place#and ive got a few more days off work thank god#i usually get sick after vacations too so ill see how im feeling by the end of the night ajfjgkg#either way i got a lot of posts ive been tagged in to catch up on so ill be rbing them soon
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It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas... 🐑🎄🎁
#cult of the lamb#merry christmas#happy holidays#ssv#art#digital fanart#sugarsweetvirgo#COTL#so fun fact i started this on the 12#and i got sick. twice. so i put it off literally 1/3 the way through#but then it became the 25th and the irrational side of me was like “oh my god we need to get this done today”#yall know that feeling lmao#I'm still sick but i had to finish it
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Having Ace as a fav is weird because the takes I see on him are either the type I've always wanted on my favs, digging into his character despite the low screentime and sharing fascinating views or the most brain dead, disappointing, shallow takes known to man
There is no in-between
#the way his fans see him makes me so happy as someone who always wanted others who looked as deep as I did#we are an insane bunch but we aren't alone so it feels so good#there are so many interesting views#then there are the wildly stupid ones#like if you aren't gonna bother looking at a character past surface level just move on and shut up#the way powerscaler dudebros' brains function is downright embarrassing#nothing wrong with enjoying cool fights and the action ofc#but judging everything by strength like some elementary schoolers is :/#it's mostly grown men too#sorry for the rant I just can't believe some of these people#I'm sure it's the same for the other characters too#lulu rambles#one piece#portgas d ace#portgas d. ace#dunno if I'm having the time of my life or wanna pull my hair out#I'm sick my brain isn't functioning normally lol#God forbid you have to think about a character beyond what the story directly feeds you
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