#i feel fucking ill ough
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HE'S HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEREEEEEEEEEEEE WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH
#long post#one piece 1071 spoilers#one piece spoilers#MY FUCKING BOY#I JUST KEPT TAKING SCREENSHOTS DO U FUCKING SEE HIM?!?!?!#OH EM GEEE AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#one piece'd#keep talkin miles#i feel fucking ill ough
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i think martha kent should get to threaten rex leech with a shotgun tbh
#rimi talks#many people in kon's life would happily line up to punt this guy and i think that's beautiful#i think clark would have some Feelings about not realizing that kon's living situation was as fucked up as it was#and i would also love to see this. bc like kon also doesn't realize it was fucked up. and is so determined to be independent#but also i feel like i have to add 7386482 disclaimers. NOBODY BLAME CLARK FOR EDITORIAL DECISIONS#just bc clark carries the weight of the world on his shoulders and blames himself for everything DOESN'T MEAN THAT'S CORRECT#(also. ill take traits kon inherited from clark for $800)#anyway im getting off track. the point is. rex coming back into kon's life at some point way down the line could be soooo juicy#like the contrast of kon having a real support system. and being older and less naive.#many directions it could go in. have ma hate rex's ass or lois eviscerate him. have clark and kon have a heart to heart about it.#have tim threaten and blackmail him again bc i still think that's fucking hilarious.#have kara hear about what happened and be filled with righteous fury that has nowhere to go. bc kon wouldn't actually want him hurt#have roxy step in before anyone else has the chance. let her go dad what the FUCK?#it's about the number of people who love and want to protect kon. unlike what happened the first time around#the kontrast of it all. if you will.#and also about kon getting some kind of closure that a grown ass adult Using him as a child was not actually his fault#ough..........
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everytime im reminded of deraps genuine attachment to pangi, and how its likely bc he doesnt have anyone else— like pangi is the only one who has ever made a genuine effort to be his friend and earn his trust, i feel slightly more insane like i thought they were SILLIES
#lifesteal#lifesteal spoilers#pangi#derapchu#im not fucking tagging them as cringeduo#hate some of this fandoms fuckass duo names#some are good but most are so damn stupid#theyre soooo situationship coded pls#like derap was so genuinely worried when he heard sb jokingly(?) talk abt packing his things and leaving#or did he talk abt using pangi?#idk ill have to rewatch but#him msging pangi to be careful immediatley while pangi took it as a joke was so#ough#ngl i feel like the thing w them is pangi takes everything so casually#he seems silly and is silly#while derap actually takes everything quite seriously and personally#so hes like seems silly but is serious#which makes the difference in how they react to things very interesting imo
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the secret to happiness is doodling something catered to You Specifically. one second you're normal the next you're biting your own arm
#ouaghasfaifadkj WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE#having a great time rn#barnaby/eddie/howdy is affecting me more than i thought it would#its soooooo surface level but WHO CARESSSSS IM EXPERIENCING JOY#literally have to pause to bite my hand/arm tho its making me insane#sometimes happiness is drawing a puppet sandwiched between two bigger puppets & getting smooches from Both#delight delight delight De-fucking-light!!!!#happy chemicals in my brain!!! hello! i have not seen you in Days!!!#slamming my face into a wall but in happiness#absolutely unprompted#ouuugasahgshagfshaksjas#the ship is Not That Deep but its so Ough yk#pure indulgence!!!#again!! catered to Me Specifically!!!#im feeling so indulgent that i will treat myself to takeout tonight#i do not have it in me to cook#and im sick of canned soup & microwave meals!!!#sushi tonight babey!!! bento box!!#ill even force myself to do the rancid dishes ive been putting off for nearly a week#that will make the takeout even More of a treat!#i will feel more deserving of it and less Guilty!
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when in doubt draw an ugly blue fuck on your phone /affectionate
i didnt really like this version. man i need to learn how lighting works. boy how did i forget that i SHADED THERE AND THAT I SHOULDVE MOVED THE FUCKIN LIGHTING aughgHghghg
#rottmnt#rottmnt leo#rise leo#rise of the tmnt#yyal art#AAAAAA#ough this song is emotional…next songgbi dont want to feel feelings right now#‘THE SONG’ FROM SONG OF THE SEA??? NO THATS EMOTIONAL TO ME TOO NEXT SONG!!#desiderium from madoka magica…fuck it whatever i guess ill stay with thgis even though it also makes me emotional#anyways im atill thinking sbout pmmm rebellion…woww#i turned off autocorrect typing coherently is so much harder
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I'm so ready for a change
#forgot i didnt add tags#i want to cut and dye my hair all fucked up#i want to start my life over#i want to be the man i KNOW i am#i feel trapped in a cage#188 days#I'll be out#ill be away#ill be myself#everything will be as it should#I know im a man but my brain is telling me otherwise it wants me to question my gender again but i know deep down ive always been a man#ough#sorry to rant#i think all the transphobia is getting to me as much as i try to post trans content to retaliate#im fine though!#sorry to vent
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#hoping i feel better idk ill see if i still am okay enough to talk after i return the device#my head and eyes really hurt and my arms still are fucked up#but i wanna play dplatoon with people later because i miss talking#i might be quieter in the server bc theres so many nee people and ive been absent for so long so. ough#shiko speaks
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what do you think about the kaeya = caribert theory? i saw some people use it as an 'explanation why his skin is dark' like. oh he used to be a Monster and the skin is a remnant of it :) and it pissed me off so bad. i need to know what other people think about it
its honestly not a theory im super fond of i think its a little stupid no offense. i dont think it makes a lot of sense? to go super in depth i'd have to take another look at the caribert quest (and maybe read up on the khaenri'ah lore we have so far again) but i kinda feel like it establishes pretty firmly that kaeya couldnt be caribert. descended from that branch of the family maybe (though im more fond of the theory that kaeya is descended from the branch of alberichs that were actually being regents, something that chlothar wasnt involved in because he distanced himself from the rest of the family to look after his son) (makes sense that kaeya would know more about the alberichs being the regents in khaenri'ah than he knows about an alberich being the founder of the abyss order) (theres a post about it i reblogged it some time ago and it hasn't left my mind since) but like.. him actively being caribert? sounds.. honestly really dumb to me.. don't ask me how kaeya isnt (or at least doesn't seem to be) affected by any curse, be it monsterification or immortality, but i just feel like that isnt the explanation. the actual explanation could be related to the events in caribert though.. cant wait for them to tell us what it actually is lol. on the off chance that this fucking theory is true then ill just bite my tongue i guess but i know im right. ok now moving on to the elephant in the room. what kind of take even is thatttttt "thats why his skin is dark"what is bro talking about🔥🔥‼️ if i read that with my own two eyes id block a person SO fast. why would you say that and treat it as serious evidence and backing for your theory. thats just. racism basically. what. anyways kaeya whos half from sumeru supremacy
#using hoyoverse logic (desert=dark skin rainforest=white skin) he'd be half a desert dweller half khaenri'ahn#(which is silly stupid logic btw. i hate it)#its SUCH a concept though#still doesnt answer how he isnt. yknow. a hilichurl. caribert style#but we've already established that i dont have answers for you as to how kaeyas existence works. sooo yea#not to get ahead of myself though but the kaeya skin COULD be evidence of him having roots in sumeru too#even what he tells us about going to sumeru as a child too if you're willing to make a stretch#because i know that was about him wanting to go to/get as close as possible to khaenri'ah#(ough btw. i feel ill whenever i think about it for too long)#but you COULD argue that the fact hoyoverse has even brought it up recently could be hinting at something#giggles and kicks my feet. we'll see;3#that was one hell of a tangent. sorry im a bit passionate about sumeru kaeya im realizing now#thank you for the ask!!!#about the other one you sent don't worry you didn't come off as rude! it's literally ok#you def arent alone in thinking that is fucking insane bc it is. hope that helps#the moment the caribert quest dropped and people were like genuinely linking caribert to kaeya i was so confused#i didnt interpret it that way at all#saying that his dark skin is because he was a monster though. like ok. do you guys ever think before you speak like ever#askpilled#kaeyaposting#kaeya alberich
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Is it even possible to buy a pokemon game at a reasonable price anymore?
Even the secondhand ones can be over £50, some are MORE than the recently released ones (which are also overpriced considering the quality imo)
#shut up ray#been scrolling through ebay#endlessly….#managed to find some but if i actually get a single game that works ill be amazed#some ppl were just selling the fucking empty box for over a tenner#which is just ???????????#ITS A CHEAPLY MADE PLASTIC BOX#i wanted a pokemon platinum cartridge but they were like £50 lowest#which is fucking disgusting genuinely to me#only one was new#that game is like 10yrs old? maybe a lil older#but its not a fucking hand-made antique art piece fml#its a fucking video game mass-produced by a corporate thing#a thing that now produces overpriced crap#i just OUGH fuck offfffff#i have my opinions on pokemon cards being excessively pricey#but atleast they are just collectable crap#imagine me selling my fucking old pokemon games for £70 id feel like a fucking lunatic#it wasnt even that much when it was first released but now its be worn down by use?#fuck capitalism
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sometimes replacing an emotion with a perhaps-equally-worse-but-for-different-reasons emotion works (even if its not healthy. we're not getting to healthy right now we're getting to what Works). today i was so pissed off about how the day was going and i felt so guilty for the kitties that i haven't been able to feed yet that day that after i cooked i just got into the car and drove to get cat supplies. and i didn't feel anxious as i usually did when i drove, and that is because i felt Angry instead. and it helped move things a lot
i understand how people fall prey to using anger as a motivator now. my mind was empty except for getting cat supplies and getting out.
at least i got to go to the bank today, so i'm able to make donations that i haven't been able to recently. head in hands. so, you know. silver linings
#yuu rambles#ougjhgkhgjdhgjkghdsjghdsjkhgjksdhgjksd im oging to . ough .#when i get pissed off i get real quiet bc im worried that if ill speak i will be very Cutting and any attempts at lighthearted sarcasm just#comes across as very bitter and resentful. which is true in the state i was in; but i didnt want to show it anyway#WHATEVER MANNNNN at least i did something useful w my anger. those kitties' living conditions were fucking horrid and we were all#dancing around the topic of actually taking care of them because it costs money. and i lowkey just snapped lmfao and just went ahead and#used my own. it was about 230 total or smth but i saved up from eid and im not using my money for anything other than donations#or buying snacks anyways so it was fine. and i got to go to the bank too for the latter bc id usually ask my brother#to stop by the bank bc it was kinda rare for me to go out on my own even though now i teeeeechnically have a learner's driving license#just bc it still intimidates me. but now i know the (temporary) answer. intimidate it back. i was so pissed off i didnt have time to#feel anything other than pissed off (and guilt for the kitties)#i need to get them to the vet soon fajkslfjsaklfajhsklfjf AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#ok thank u for reading my rant love u
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SEASON 4 FINALE.........I felt genuinely ill the whole time like my stomach was twisting I was gonna throw up oh my god what the FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#SAM MY BOY#SAMUEL MY BELOVED IM SO SORRY#THE FUCKING CON ........ THE WHOLE TIME!?!?!?! THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME!?!??!?!#u js have 2 respect her @ this point 4 that bc holy shit#2 season spanning game she was in 4 the LONG HAUL#cas defying fuckers 4 the gayass 1 million complex brothers 🎉#sam made me want 2 throw up so much#he js wanted 2 save ppl .... he didnt kno!!!! HE DIDNT KNO!!!!!!!!!!! (said thru tears)#THE FUCKING DEMOM EYES...ON HIM......IT MADE ME ILL#srry!!!!!!! sam thoughts im rlly biased#OUGH he PRAYED he had FAITH and he was MANIPULATED and TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF and REFUSED 2 SEE IT bc he WANTED 2 BELIEVE#that he culd do GOOD despite tbe fact he KNEWWW he had DEMOM BLOOD in himmmmmmm!!!!!!!!! ARRRRRRGHHHHHHHH#im having so many thoughts. abt him. but i dont thibk im articulating them v well @ all.. oh well! do u understand what i mean#anyways unreleated i thibk sam an cas shuld fuck nasty#im making galaxy brain parallels between them i js cant explain them v well. but i think gay sex wuld help (it wuldnt)#uhmmmm what else#chucks goofy i hope nthn bad happens 2 him (smth bad always happens)#MAN!!!!!!!!!!!! can these stupid ass brothers catch a BREAK!!!!!!! for ONCE!!!!!!!!!!!!#can s5 b normal (s5 won't b normal)#why the hell did i start watching spn. worst mistake of my life#ive been reminded i CAN infact get emotionally attached 2 fictional characters. thanks spn. ive got sam rotating in my mind now#i want dean 2 punch fuck outta him and then i want them 2 make up and they shuld fly 2 sum place else and have a normal life#im so DONE w this show!!!!! (im starting s5 next wk)#why the hell os this show making me feel shit bro this wasnt supposed 2 happen :(#sigh.....................oh well#spn#rivers rambles <3
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i dont get how daigo could be bitchy and moody while wearing a puffer like . my brother in christ do you even know how silly you look rn trying to be emo in a puffer
#snap chats#looked at myself for too long and was about to have my Daily Required Evil Monologue but i just look too goofy with this thing on LMAO#its cold as hell. all the time. if i draw daigo in his puffer at some point this will be why#but yeah bro i cant sulk when i look like the michelin man like cmon#thats how i know daigo aint been around a mirror in Ever......#ough i wanna play gaiden now wait. coliseum calls to me......#i should eat tho UGH i dont know what to eat tho.#my heart always tells me to go with the pork floss onigiri but i already had one today#technically i eat two a day so i colud make another one but it'd feel weird only eating One..#but then i'd have had three rice balls and i dont like the number three... do we see my overly-convoluted dilemma...#ill prob cave and make two anyway. if im so tbh.#Come What May tomorrow my kirby onigiri case is coming in :) oh yeah i bought one of those. after being influenced. by bestie </3#OK BYE what the fuck am i gonna do oho my god i wanted to draw but now coliseum but now food bu
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I'm having One Of Those Nights babey!!
#dissociation + sleep dep combo is funnnn#(by fun I mean my head feels like it is full of cotton + all regard for my personal needs & safety has left#bcause according to my brain I'm not real anyway (<- not true)#so it takes a significant effort to convince myself to take care of my needs)#I need to go the fuck to bed already lol#but consider: what if I didn't#if I stay up late enough then one of our caretakers will come (metaphorically) smack me over the head#and that sounds nice tbh#been ignoring my headmates too much recently#ough that mental sure can illness
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trying really hard to get some art done but my hands are still shaking so bad
#i feel so unproductive and lazy as of late#im making like. maybe one drawing a week#and its usually just miscellaneous sketches that arent even worth posting#starting to get really insecure about opening commissions because like.#if i cant even do art that EYE want to do. how do i do art that somebody else wants me to do#but i really need the fucking money right now. ough#this is a really unfair day to be beating myself up over this given ive been ill for the majority of it. like bedridden ill
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life is so good and awesome peace and love on planet earth
#my plans r that im probs gonna go shopping tomorrow bcos i need a few bits in town#need to try out sports bras n then also stock up on vitamins and see if they have a pill box w more than 2 daily compartments#plus itll b nice to walk around a bit after pretty much living in my apartment w only corner store trips for the past couple days#and then the day after that i need to go 2 my parents house bcos ill b out of ritalin and i left the rest there#and ill chill all weekend bcos my next essay isnt until the 20th so i can afford it#and then on monday morning i have a phone call w my psychiatrist (!!)#so ill probably be at my parents house for that#and then try and go back to my apartment. itd b nice to do it in the morning-ish but idk if anyone could drive me 2 the bus stop#so itll probs b in the evening#and then once im in my apartment again ill try get cracking on the essay!!!#i know my '1.5k essay in a day' skillz r likely more a response to deadlines than a skill i can enact at will#but like. ill try and enact it#one of the essay prompts is talking abt a local museum exhibit so i might go do that itd b nice to go to the museum#take the day go to the whole museum and take notes on the specific section and let myself think for a little bit#and then do the essay the next day#and then ill b fucking done for the whole summer!!!! yippee#well there'll be assorted miscellanea needs to get done but whatever. final assignment home free#yayyyyy yippee life so nice and fun. i needed this#gonna finish changing my bedsheets and then do my dishes and get myself some ice cream and then just chill!#ough hang on i can kinda feel myself crashing after my meal. tired again. goddammit. hopefully this is temporary#anyway erm yay yippee things looking up for eimear
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watched dune2 and I rate it 9/10 I liked it
#honestly though i really liked some parts and some parts i kinda hated#cest la vie#overall tho i wanna say 8.5 but i think its weird to do halfs so im saying 9#which i guess is 4.5 outta 5 which feels better to say#ill have to rethink abt it later maybe and revuse my score#the one thing tho was the ending being not rly a cliffhanger but a continuation set up for the next made me feel like ough#i thot they would wrap it up in this one but apprently rheres like a ton more#which is good just not what i expected i guess#fuck i forgot my posts tag ugh#subway rat post#<i like this better its easier to remember methinks
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