#i feel bad for anyone who's ever had to make up with the showrunners

[mauvecardigans]

okay. okay.

look.

see kay whining/possible spoilers ?

shitass writing aside, jlaw's character assassination aside, inane plots aside

why does [the other one, who doesn't have a nickname that isn't diminutive] always have to be the one to back down. even after s5 and the ponytailed bastard proved he wasn't just being a paranoid karen

i hate damn near everyone in this bar. can't wait for s6.2

[toorumlk]

Hey! Do you think there’s any chance they might not make Romione canon in the upcoming HBO series because of the popularity of other pairings and JKR’s somewhat recent statements concerning the ship?

fair warning this is gonna be a long post!

you know anon, i’m not gonna deny that the possibility of romione not being canon in the hbo series doesn’t keep me up at night HOWEVER COMMA-

I believe romione will be safe because i’m placing a lot, if not all, of my faith in the upcoming hbo series being repeatedly described as a "faithful" adaptation of the 7 novels. which we can deduce to mean romione friends to lovers slow burn endgame and all that good stuff (maybe i'll talk about the potential of book romione and the serial tv medium some other time)

and sure, it can all be marketing/pandering/etc. but i find it so hard to feel cynical about hbo because i love LOVE their shows and i'm of the belief that they know how to tell a good ass story (and romione happens to be a good ass romance subplot). i also have such positive feelings about the showrunner Frances Gardiner (consulting prod on succession and also has killing eve under her belt) who JKR chose herself and one of the exec producers of the show who's set to direct of a bunch of episodes Mark Mylod (succession, the menu, tlou, got)!!!! and if you know me at all you'll know that succession is one of the main pillars of my personality and i fucking love that show so bad I would follow anyone who was part of the making of that show off a cliff if they asked me to. and Mark Mylod is a fantastic fucking episodic director who's directed and produced some of the best episodes of television ever, so i know he knows how to tell a good story. and though i'm a lot less familiar with Gardiners' work, she is a female creative who has some of my personal favourite episodes listed in her imdb (chiantishire, living+, tailgate party) who's pitch of the show made joanne give her the job so.... and y'all know im a canon bootlicker and love the books so all i'll say is.. real recognizes real.

so knowing the creative team behind hp series had a direct hand in making my favourite show of all time gets me so excited and giddy!!!!

but here's where my personal theories and speculations start: I really think with this hbo series, JKR is on a mission is create something wholly and newly hers. she was barely involved creatively in the production of the movies until DH pt. 1 and 2 and the movies have almost become an entity of its own that's drifted so far away from her. of course i realize me even just talking sympathetically about JKR is deeply touchy and might piss some people off but as a fellow creative, i feel for her man!! when i think of the best books in the series in my opinion that are filled with the best bits of world building and political commentary, what i find is that GoF was handed to a director who didn't even read the book, OotP was the shortest movie in the franchise despite being the longest book and how it entirely missed the Quibbler plot and all of harry's rage, or HBP that was filled to the brim with *chefs kiss* tom/voldemort lore which was done a complete disservice in the grey and brown sludgy mess that is the HBP movie.

and knowing that JKR now has a strained relationship or had a falling out with most of the top dogs involved in the films like Kloves and Yates (hallelujah what who said that) and Emma Watson and Daniel Radcliffe means this show has the chance to be a behemoth that’s entirely joanne’s, like the books are. it’ll be free of Kloves' Hermione and harmony (harry x hermione) favouritism or Watson's take on Hermione's character that makes my ass itch or Yate’s complete inability to direct his actors and make non-action scenes have heart, soul and heft. but i also can’t not address the elephant in the room: this section of the discussion is filled with every shade of grey possible because what led to the falling outs was that they all vehemently disagreed with JKR's anti-trans views and good on them they absolutely should! but like.............. i hated kloves' writing and his butchering of ron's character, i think yates is a static and boring director and im not a fan of emma's acting so like... a win is a win? NO IT'S NOT. but IT IS. BUT IT'S SO NOT. but do you see what i'm getting at???

the point i'm trying to make is that joanne is not the same person she was when she was first writing the books or when the movies were being made. I think she's a lot more ruthless and cutthroat now and while i disagree with her methods and condemn her transphobia.... i think this newfound hardness to her will lend itself to making the hbo series the best HP adaptation it can be, I'M SORRY it's absolutely fucked and i acknowledge and abhor her gender critical politics as a queer woman but im also an artist who just wants good, high quality stories to be told 😔😩

and as for the other popular ships and JKR's somewhat recent comments about romione:

I think its safe to say that joanne dgaf about this fandom and what's popular in it anymore LMFAOOOO 😭😭😭 i genuinely respect that she's always stood ten toes down about how draco's not some antihero, bad boy love interest and at best is a cautionary tale on prejudiced bullies, so I don't think that's changing anytime soon. especially considering that the dramione cottage industry that its fans have made is more or less a reactionary "fuck you" to joanne and canon which they do by writing fanfic about crimes against women and making merch and binding physical copies of said fanfics (really showing it to the big baddie transphobic DV survivor by *checks notes* auctioning hermione off as a sex slave) so I doubt she'd ever consider other ship's popularity seriously. as for the possibility of harry and hermione becoming endgame um..... if the show plans to faithfully adapt the books then we'd get harry and hermione’s quintessential sibling dynamic plus we’re already free from Kloves (also i have faith in francesca and mark knowing that harmony are just plain BORING) so i think the chances, again, are low. and if joanne really wants to stick it to her old colleagues, she can go down the route of pushing romione that much harder (and she really wouldn’t have to do much, it’s all in the books already) 😭

as for the comments on romione that she’s made in recent years, i think a lot of it’s been blown out of proportion or have gone through a terrible game of telephone. what she said (paraphrasing here) about ‘wishing she’d handled ron/hermione differently because a lot of what went into them was a wish fulfillment fantasy’ has turned into ‘jk rowling regrets making romione endgame???!!’ which is just *takes a drag from a cigarette* just another tuesday around here. i also would link to two meta posts by @saintsenara on the topic of endgame romione which i wholeheartedly agree with it

all i have to say is that going into making this show i hope joanne remembers that she based ron’s character off of a person in her life she liked when she was younger and who is still a good friend of hers now 😭😔

you guys probably know i’m in animation school which is basically film school in a different font. so i’m quite literally training to one day work in the story department on projects and work alongside writers, directors and producers, so this stuff means a lot to me! she and the creative team behind this upcoming show have the chance to make something really special and i’m finding it hard not to root for them!!!!!

[azaharinflames]

Thankyou for making that post about not making assumptions about the cast. I wish fandom stopped parasocialling with them so much, it's so weird. Not only the Oliver stuff but that Lou is this poor little heartbroken uwu baby and how the whole cast were awful for not defending him (I've seen alot of "and no one stood up for him!!" posts too).

None of us know these people! What someone puts (or doesn't put) on their public instagram is worlds away from what they may (or may not) say or communicate in private.

And it's kind of depressing to assume the worst of them (any of the cast) rather than just that they're professionals doing their jobs.

Fandom in the last few days has been so much fun with the plot speculation, fics, memes and stuff. I find the criticism of the plots and the writing (and Tim to an extent in his role as showrunner) satisfying, but not to take that to the actors. For me, it's much more enjoyable (and better for my mental health) to have fun with our blorbos in our sandpit and keep the characters and actors separate.

Thanks for letting me vent!

Hi, Nonnie! Thank you for venting in my inbox!

Happy to let you vent, and sorry it took me this long to answer. I kinda promised myself I was going to have a small break from Tumblr this weekend after my last post, and only let myself reblog some. Back here again though!

Yeah, I think it's very important to draw a line and keep it there. If we need a permanent marker, so be it. I come from the Marvel and Glee fandom, and especially in the latter I saw a lot of wild shit. Including Darren Criss's wife having to go private across all social media because of the insane stuff she was unfairly accused of. Hell, when (spoiler) Blaine and Kurt broke up for a while, Darren had to post a goddamn letter to apologise, because he feared the worst. Like. Insane.

And I've been seeing the crazy here as well from the B*ddie fandom, and I stopped checking that hashtag (can't check it even for their friendship) because of how wild it was. We are nowhere near what they do, don't get me wrong. But just because of that, and because this has been, hands down, the nicest fandom I've ever been on, I don't want us crossing lines in a moment of anger or disappointment.

And it's hard to know when to say something, too, because I do feel like the feelings we were dealing with were entirely justified. But as you said, it's better if we keep focused on the show and the, frankly, bad writing they are doing this season.

And yeah, I'm annoyed at the behavior of some actors, but I understand your point. I won't lie and say I liked how no one said a thing about the harassment Lou received, but I also know better and I know it is quite possible they talked about it in real life, and it is very much none of our business.

At the end of the day, Lou has expressed multiple times he was very happy to be in the 911 set, and even in his latest interviews he doesn't contradict this. He's a grown man who deserved to see all the love that we have for him after endless months of harassments, yes. But I also think he's a grown man who knows what he's doing and what he wants.

Anyway. This was long, sorry haha.

If anyone wants to vent, rant, or express their opinions, my inbox is open❣️

[princelance]

a movie........

time for a rant that has been a looong time coming because

the FUCK??? NOOOOOOOOOOOO PLEASE NO NO NO PLEASE GOD IF YOU'RE OUT THERE NEVER LET THIS MOVIE SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY NEVER EVEN MENTION THAT SHOW EVER AGAIN IN MY PRESENCE it should fucking DIE and stay DEAD

the WORST fandom i've ever come across/been part of. everyone was so fucking braindead. god the bullying here was So Bad. vld fandom was the epitome of 'you can't enjoy what you like'. and the bullies were like, some of the most popular blogs here. the content creators (among others ofc) here were NASTY. the people making decent art were so fucking rude to almost anyone that didn't bow down to them and agree with their views on the show, sitting on their high horse like they were fucking gods or something when they were like, 17 or something. mind u voltron was a show about ugly transformers lions and a bunch of kids in space meant for 7 YEAR OLDS. like stfu it's not deep, it's not important. i get that this is the internet i really do but apparently everyone was a pedo and homophobic and racist and needed to be cancelled because they weren't pure angels. i hope the people who liked the show, both teens and adults alike, have grown up and learnt what those words actually mean and why you shouldn't just casually throw them around. i hated you all. u had to be so careful about what you said on here, it was like north korea or something. i remember how kids got bullied into deleting their harmless fanfics, the fucking voice actors got bullied on a daily basis, it was BAD. i remember i got hate for having shiro as my icon and the background was the bi flag colours. I AM BI. also, so what if i had headcanoned shiro as bi, you couldn't have stopped me or anyone else from thinking that, and also IT WOULD NOT HAVE MATTERED, HE'S FICTIONAL, HE'S JUST LINES AND PIXELS. i know this is going to shatter some of your worlds (or at least would have back then), but a random ass nobody on tumblr headcanoning a character as bi when said character is "actually" straight/gay/whatever is NOT going to affect irl queer people in any way, it does NOT have real life consequences. who gives a fuck. since when has the fandom given a shit about canon anyway? fuck you.

okay, i've been bitching about the fandom enough (no i haven't, there's no way you can ever bitch about the vld fandom enough). what about the actual show? well. once again it's meant for 7 year olds. who cares if it was good or not. i've seen seasons 1–6. i liked season 1, didn't really like anything after that since the show seemed to change so much. the first season kind of has a different vibe completely? idk how to explain it, it just kind of feels like the actual show and then the rest was just a long fanfic by someone who was in love with keith's character. but since i was watching the show with my sister who was 10 at the time, it was fine, otherwise i wouldn't have kept watching after seeing season 2 i don't think.

here are a few negative things about the show imo:

making keith the main character out of nowhere after s1 (where he definitely wasn't the main focus) was so dumb. god the showrunners loved keith sooo much, it was so stupid. keith was nooot a leader. whatever.

making keith the black paladin was also so fucking stupid my god. and yes, everyone here wanting LANCE to become the black paladin just because he was the fandom favourite (don't get me wrong, he was my fave too) was so fucking braindead too honestly. shiro or allura. no one else made any sense.

canon allurance SUUUCKED. like holy shit that was so bad and horribly written, even lotor and allura had a better love story and had waaay more chemistry (and their relationship ended badly, rightfully so). and NO klance was never ever ever going to be canon, you were so delusional. like lmaooo did we even watch the same show? i just really enjoyed their dynamic and that's why i shipped them together, whatever. but yeah, like i said the bullying here was disgusting and everyone was cancelled, great, klance seemed to be the only thing you were allowed to like so in that sense i was lucky.

everything they did with allura in the later seasons............ you know what? i'm not even going to start. because wtfffffffff, as a storyteller myself i ?????? what in the world were they thinking. but yeah whatever it does not matter.

the point of this post is that EW EW EWWWW FUCK THAT SHOW AND FUCK YOU, if you were in the voltron fandom in 2017/2018 i personally hate you

[yonpote]

i guess another thing is like. what about crackships. do people still crackship? just shipping characters or people who have no reason to ever be together? or like shipping pairings that arent canon and not really caring about them being canon? i think maybe... ok i have to word what im trying to articulate carefully... but sometimes i think that the height of discussion of queerbaiting ended up putting this massive emphasis of canon representation (which is undeniably important!!!) that fandom shipping culture has completely shifted and doesn't really leave a lot of room for imagination, at least in the mainstream. like, whether or not a pairing ends up together in the end has always been kinda important in fandoms, but since most of the popular ships have been m/m (and before queerbaiting became more commonplace as a term) there was just kind of a quiet understanding that yeahhh they're probably NOT gonna end up together at the end...

i'll give bbc sherlock as an example. actually sherlock might be the perfect example as it came out around the turn of the 00s-10s decade which is exactly when the conversation surrounding queerness in media began to shift. now i fell off sherlock after season two so my knowledge of the show after that is limited, but from my pov of that early fandom, i don't really remember anyone clamoring for johnlock to end up confirmed canon. i mean people wanted it to happen ofc but it felt like wishful thinking rather than something that could actually happen. it wasn't until fans had this direct communication with the creators of the show that they realized maybe they COULD have an impact on what happens, applying pressure on them as queer representation in media became more of a hot button issue. and ultimately i DO think that the chemistry of john and sherlock as a couple should have been something that the creators took more seriously, regardless if they became Canon. i mean people have been shipping holmes/watson and even holmes/moriarty since the books were first published probably. so the showrunners dropped the ball on that big time in the end, but imo it wasnt until queer representation became viewed as more than just a pipe dream that johnlock's Endgame Status became of utmost importance.

thats kinda what i mean by "i"d ship dnp even if they werent straight up a couple" and why i mentioned feeling a tiny bit bad for the frerardies in the shipping poll lol cuz like a ship being Real probably shouldn't be what makes a pairing good, and if we treat that with extreme importance then we lose out on the transformative side of fandom, the fact that we can make something "real" even if it's not word-of-god Canon.

[chaifootsteps]

I don't think anyone making the 'it's wrong to argue the show abandoned its premise' argument has really engaged with what the problem here actually is

there's often this bad faith painting of everyone with the same brush that they're just complaining because they thought they were being promised one thing and got another and that's their only problem.

besides the fact it's not exactly wrong if you thought you were getting steak only to be disappointed when the show served up slurry instead, it's ignoring the bigger problem.

the premise of the show is supposed to drive the story and without that frame, a lot of stories lose focus. and hb is very much one of those stories. We have a story where the writers are increasingly disinterested in the emotional state of their own main character, and as far as the Stolas plotlines go...oh boy.

So Stella had moved out by Ozzie's yet we're now approaching ten episodes later and the divorce is still not finalized, who knows what's even going on with that at this point. Doubtless it will form the backbone of s3 if they make it because that and stol!tz are the only things the show has left going for it.

And that means the writers have to drag out both plotpoints as long as possible because nothing else matters at this point. If what they're going for now is drama and not comedy I would like to point out most prestige drama has multiple plotlines with its ensemble cast. HB has set up plenty of avenues for that and done nothing with most of them. They have no road that would feel natural to develop because they've left themselves no options.

Also - and it probably goes without saying but I'll say it anyway - 'will a character divorce his evil wife' and 'will that same character successfully bully his love interest into being his idea of the perfect partner' are not good driving questions for long form drama. We know Stolas is definitely going to leave Stella so there's little dramatic tension outside of her trying to get petty revenge, which is dumb since Stolas has the god powers to just body her if he wanted to. And the second one assumes the audience is invested in the will they won't they of Stol!tz - and given how unlikeable Stolas has become more fans are getting turned off from ever caring if they will (and the showrunners already spoiled the ending on that, so extra who cares?)

it's the exact same logic people use to dismiss anyone saying 'X character is badly written' when they snidely respond 'you're just sad your headcanon the show never said it was going to give didn't come true'. It's a neat little trick to avoid why critics hate how Stolas, Stella, Millie etc. are written (or underwritten)

Well said. But then, "bad faith painting" is nothing new to the crowd of people we're talking about. I think they actually know full well what the problem critics have is, but resorting to strawmen arguments is all they've got.

[twelvroses]

LIZ's DIARY - 16/07/24. mentioned: @dreamquest @fiixion @yunzip @pinkscaped ♡ (& ahin lol)

The latest episode of Dreamquest just aired; I’m writing this in my dorm. Have I even written about my dorm? I can’t remember the last time I actually had the time to sit down and write, I think it was just before the show started… I used to be so diligent about keeping this diary, but life has gotten so hectic. I’m sharing a room with Yoon and Miyu. Both of them seem nice, but it’s a little awkward. Since we were all on different teams, I don't know how to approach them them because I'm not sure if they see me as a friend or just someone they'll need to beat. I wish I was the type of person who could start a conversation with anyone, but I just don’t know how to keep it going. The words don’t come for me. I haven't really bonded with any of the other girls, and I can tell that some of the other girls think I’m a bitch, but everyone always thinks I’m a bitch and I can live with that. Sani is really nice, though, she's really really cute, and she was so nice to me after the Fancy performance, so I think it'd be fun to be on a team with her at some point. But it would be really nice if I could at least befriend my dormmates too. I mean, assuming none of us get eliminated, they’re gonna be the first and last people I see every time I wake up or go to bed. Don’t you think that kinda sets the tone for your entire day? Even if none of us make it, it still would be nice to have some friends. That reminds me, now that I’m at Valentine, I hope I get a chance to meet the Medusa girls soon. I’ve always really liked Choi Gain sunbaenim. She just comes out and says whatever she’s thinking, no matter who’s listening or how many cameras are on her. I’ve been trying to be like that, but like everything else I try to say, it dies in my throat. Maybe if I get to hang out with her, it’ll rub off on me a little bit. 

Anyway, I won't have chance of meeting Medusa if Valentine drop me, and they might do just that, cause the CEO already told me that he expects big things from me. He told me to keep my sights set on top 5, because this is the very first time Valentine has EVER sent a trainee to a debut show, and I’m their only trainee, so if I totally flop, it’ll be really embarrassing for them, and I feel like the whole place is built on one man's very flimsy ego so he'll probably just drop me. We got to see our rankings and right now, I’m at nine. It’s not too bad, and so I want to be proud of it, but I know it’s not good enough. It doesn’t feel fair. I didn’t get a single solo line in Genie! How the hell am I supposed to get screen time and convince people to vote for me if I’m not being given the same opportunity to sing as some of the others? I wonder if the showrunners think I can’t sing because I rap. 

I also hate my new CEO, Yoo Seobin. He walks around like a weirdo mafia boss. You know, Ahin sunbaenim told me that when they go out for company dinners, he makes him, Choi Gain and Kwon Harin sit at a separate table with him. It’s supposed to be a ‘leaders privilege,’ but he’s kind of just keeping them away from the party. He thinks he’s the godfather, or something. Like it's an honour to sit with him. If I end up in a Valentine group, I pray to god that I’m not the leader. I’d hate to sit and drink with him. Did you see his fucking press release about me? He talked about how I was hypnotizing and my beauty was unmatched or something… Like he’s a married, middle aged man. It's so weird and I'm really worried if he keeps talking about me like that, people will start making up rumours. Even the thought makes me want to throw up. I wore the baggiest clothes I own last time I had to go to his office, and he still kept looking at me weird. Ahin sunbaenim said I can wear one of his sweaters next time, because if he sees me in boy's clothes he might assume I have a boyfriend and back off. It’s kind of cute that he thinks that would work. 

But Ahin sunbaenim is nice. I’m even going to record a demo for him next week. It’s not gonna be for me in the end, I think he’s just gonna send it out to a bunch of labels and see who wants the song, but I’m getting paid for recording so it’s already the most legit gig than I’ve had in about five years. He’s fun to hang out with. I think he has a little bit of a crush on me, but for once that doesn’t bother me. I think it’s just refreshing to come across a guy, especially one who’s a bit older than I am, who isn’t so fucking leery and demanding. He doesn’t even flirt or anything, he just gets shy around me and it’s easy to make him blush. It’s funny. And he does have a nice smile.

I just realised I'm writing about boys in my diary so I'm going to stop now because I'm not twelve. Kwon Ahin is the last thing I need to be thinking about right now. What I need to do is win this competition. I really hope, like really really really hope that I can rap in the next round. Like a proper rap that wasn’t written by fucking JYP, I mean. I’m really regretting singing for my audition. My first choice was Payday by Yoon Mirae but Seobin told me I had to pick something recent. If I’d pulled off a Yoon Mirae song I think I might be way higher in the ranks by now. But if I don’t get to rap there’s no way I’m gonna crack the top five. And if I get kicked from Valentine, it’s like losing the biggest opportunity I’ve ever had. I feel like I might just be setting myself up for one big joke. I couldn’t even rise up the popularity rankings of Bouquet. Do you know how easy it is to be more popular than a Bouquet member? Most idols who debut achieve it on their first day without even knowing cause they probably don’t know who Bouquet are. Were. Also, FUCK OHJANG ENTERTAINMENT.

I owe more money than I’ve earned, my parents lost all enthusiasm for this path for me a long time ago… I can’t even remember what it felt like for them to take pride in me. Honestly I started writing this entry because I thought I was going to end it by affirming to myself that this would be a turning point and I’d ace it from here on out, but I kinda feel worse than when I started writing. I should go to bed. I have to get up early to get some practice in before official practice starts, and if the girls who ranked lower than me find out I’m whining and moping about ranking 9th, they’ll think I’m even more of a bitch than they already do.

Well, just wish me luck in the next round, I guess!

[samisadeangirl]

I read a post that said Dean was clearly physically abusive to Sam pre-Stanford because of how Sam is never surprised when Dean punches him when he's angry (when Sam said Dean was replacing John with Gordon, when Sam took the Impala, when Soulless!Sam confessed something was wrong with him, when Dean finds out he was using demonic powers) and how Dean took out his anger on Meg!Sam by punching Unpossessed Sam and how Sam is clearly very used to it to be able to say that Dean can hit him more if it makes him feel better. What do you think about it?

Hi Anon,

Ugh, this nonsense again?? Frankly, I file the "Dean is physically abusive" BS in the same trash can as the "John is physically abusive" BS because both bad takes are coming from people who have an agenda (i.e. Dean or John haters) and/or are projecting their own issues onto the character.

Yes, Dean does punch or even beat up Sam a few times, particularly in the early seasons, and obviously that's not good. I tend to blame behavior like this and Dean calling Sam "gay" in the early seasons on Kripke basically being a dude-bro who thought it would make Dean seem more "macho" or something, particularly since we don't see it happening much under the other showrunners. Regardless, Dean's crappy childhood and overall crappy life clearly left him with a lot of issues, including not knowing how to handle his anger well sometimes, which most of us will agree is one of his flaws.

However, I don't believe this ever reaches the level of Dean being abusive to Sam because Sam is clearly not afraid of his brother and has no problem with punching or beating up Dean on occasion too (just like neither Sam nor Dean act afraid of John or have a problem physically confronting their father). We know how Sam behaves around an actual abuser--just look at his fear and hyper-vigilance when he's near Lucifer post-Cage--and he doesn't behave that way around Dean. (Flinching when Dean knocked the books off the table in 13.18 Bring 'Em Back Alive doesn't count because anyone would flinch at a sudden loud noise--Sam also flinched when Mary slammed the Bunker door in an earlier episode, for example.)

Trying to extrapolate that this behavior means that Dean was abusive during their childhood is especially nonsensical because there's no actual evidence, just projecting. We've seen repeatedly that Sam has no compunction against complaining about how (legitimately) shitty his childhood was, including the moving around, being left alone, enforced training, overall danger, and so on, yet he never once in 15 seasons mentions being hit or otherwise physically abused as a kid by either his brother or his father, and I can't see Sam keeping quiet about something that significant if it had ever happened. This goes back to the basic rules of canon: If it didn't happen onscreen (words or actions), then it's not canon, and if it's solely based on "interpretation" or "subtext" or "coding," then it's just head-canon.

As I mentioned before, the "fans" who come up with this sort of "X is abusive" BS tend to be stans/haters who want everyone to believe that their fave is a poor widdle meow-meow and/or perfect cinnamon roll who can do no wrong and is totes abused by mean ole X, and so they try to interpret both characters' behavior to fit this agenda. They completely miss that one of the appeals of both Sam and Dean is that they're complex characters with both admirable and negative traits, not boring cardboard cutouts. Their narrative not only does a disservice to Dean, whose anger issues are far outweighed by his caring, empathy, and selflessness, but also to Sam, who is a BAMF who stood up to Lucifer and God himself, not some helpless victim--and who loves his brother more than anything.

[cannonball5]

You know I don’t think I’ve ever seen an argument in defense of Portwell and/or Rini without at least one of three things:

1. A bashing of Rina as a ship or Ricky and Gina as characters.

2. Anger at the writers/Tim for “ruining” the ships with “poor writing.”

3. Crying into the void that things would be different if Olivia hadn’t left the show

I bring this up because a lot of anti Rina sentiment has popped up online recently. Maybe it has to do with the upcoming anniversary of the series finale, but for whatever reason I’m going to try to put this to bed once and for all, even though I know it’s going to fall on deaf ears (blind eyes?). And to anyone who wants to debate me on this, I gladly say, “bring it on.” Anyway on to breaking down the main things I see repeated over and over again:

1. Bashing Rina, Ricky, and/or Gina: why do so many of you feel the need to tear down a ship or character to feel better? This thinking has led to so many takes that just aren’t true. ‘Ricky jumps from girl to girl,’ ‘Gina is Ricky’s second choice,’ ‘Ricky’s a home wrecker,’ ‘Gina’s a home wrecker,’ ‘Ricky keeps stealing EJ’s girlfriends,’ ‘Gina should’ve been more understanding of the pressure EJ was under.’ And these are some of the nicer takes. By the way I can disprove all of these, and that’s not hyperbolic, I actually can. This desire to tear down a ship you don’t like is not the argument you think it is. The show, character progression, and writing all showcased why these ships work or don’t work. Speaking of.

2. Saying the writing is bad: have you ever read a book or book series and had two characters you wished would get together and then they didn’t? Did you take the book throw it on the ground and say that the writing was bad and you can’t enjoy that book series anymore? That’s what you all sound like. Now I’m not saying that I liked or even agreed with 100% of the show’s writing (season 2 always feels like a slog to get through for me), but the show’s writing isn’t bad. In fact the writing for Ricky, Gina, EJ, and Nini especially is consistent and in character (an assertion I am more than willing and able to back up). Just because the writing isn’t to your particular taste doesn’t mean it’s bad.

3. The Olivia Rodrigo departure: Every time I hear that if Olivia hadn’t left the show Rini and Portwell would be endgame, I want to tear my hair out. Putting aside the fact that Tim Federle, The Creator and Showrunner of the series, has stated multiple times on the record that after the Homecoming Episode in season one that the writing shifted to focus on Ricky and Gina, there’s still a mountain of evidence that Ricky and Gina were always going to be the endgame couple. The fact their stories remain intertwined even during their time apart in season 2, the fact they only were able to start other relationships when they weren’t actively in each other’s lives, and of course the most important piece of evidence, The Rina Cue. I cannot for the life of me figure how anyone can make the claim that Rini and/or Portwell were getting back together when the Rina Cue exists. No one has ever been able to give me a clear and concise explanation for how they can explain away the only original background musical cue for any couple in the entire show. Rini doesn’t have one, Portwell doesn’t either. Seblos, Jetney, Madlyn, Redlyn, Jennzzara, none of them have an original background cue that plays whenever they have a scene together. Only Rina. So if anyone can give me a logical explanation that explains away that melody, I’m genuinely curious to see if you can.

Look, I’m not saying you have to like Rina, it’s fine if you feel a connection to Rini or Portwell or any of the other ships in this show we all love. All I’m asking is if we can all be respectful of each other and engage in respectful discourse about what we did and didn’t like about the series, without feeling the need to attack each other’s ships? Otherwise I’ll probably end up writing another one of these, and nobody wants that.

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

@ckhalloween23

Here is my submission for the Week 2 prompt "Witches"--a preview from a new fic I'm working, Flower of Lemon and Feather of Shrike! I decided to do a deep dive into Yasmine's drastically OOC Season 4 behavior, and explore a scenario where its origin is...a bit more sinister than poor writing or repressed lesbianism aknskfnhdrf

This one isn't just for the YasMoon girlies, but in fact for all the girlies who thought Yasmine Nolastname was big boi screwed over in S4, and deserved better!!! Even the foulest of bitchy bullies don't deserve to be reduced to a trophy girlfriend and a prop for a male character's storyline, especially when said male character is a pretty garbage boyfriend when it comes right down to it </3 (More on that later!!!)

This one is also for the MoonPiper girlies, because god, were we fucked over too D: Also actually (mostly) canon compliant, except H*wkM**n never ever get back together and stay broken up forever and always amen peace and love on planet earth <3 <3 <3 <3

There's no world where I will acknowledge this stupid ship got undeadified like a horrendous, nonsensical, chemistry-devoid zombie when it had long since run its narrative course and played its role in both Eli and Moon's arcs can you tell awehakureyigsrf

This is Moon's POV and Yasmine and Moon-centric, but I left the shippier parts ambiguous since I wanted to make something that my non-shipper friends can enjoy too ^^; There are feelings on Moon's side but as far as I'm concerned that's basically canon lmao like did you SEE that girl in S4??? She was so thirsty for Blondie that I'm genuinely shocked the showrunners didn't tell Hannah Kepple to stop kanhdskufhd Definitely tried to leave Yasmine's feelings more up in the air, though! Interpret her however you like ^^

Fic preview under the cut! As always, moodboard pic credits available upon request!

***

The phone line cuts off, and Yasmine’s name disappears from the screen.

Moon curls into her pillow, erupting in ragged sobs. She can’t remember the last time she’s felt this helpless.

This entirely consumed by pure, raw emotion.

Her mind is a whirlpool, everything Yasmine spat at her twisting around and around and around. None of it seems real.

Because Moon can’t wrap around her head around meaning nothing to Yasmine. She can’t make sense of a world where she was only a pawn—someone for the repressed queen bee to “experiment” with. Someone to cater to Yasmine’s whims and fulfill her every desire and ask nothing in return.

Yasmine was everything to Moon. Moon was nothing to Yasmine. And how did that make any fucking sense?

Moon’s hands knot into the covers, a scream ripping from her throat. Somewhere amid the blinding torrent of heartbreak and rage, she finds herself tearing incense sticks from her drawers and lighting candles with shaking hands.

She always swore to herself she’d never touch the rear section of her spellbook, pages marked with a black tab. But if Yasmine can’t keep her promises, why should Moon?

Her chest burns as she recites the incantation.

“By flower of lemon and feather of shrike I bid you know what this pain is like”

*

“Maybe we could meet in the middle? Like a…sexual Venn diagram?”

Yasmine’s face twists in disgust. Moon only rolls her eyes.

She would tell Demetri to stop being a creep, but she knows he doesn’t mean it. Just playing the part he thinks he should after girls have started noticing him.

And Moon knows what it’s like to hide your authentic self to better fit a mold. She’s eternally thankful Piper taught her better.

“So what’s under the blanket?” she prompts.

As Demetri begins his demonstration, Yasmine’s expression shifts. “Not bad. My parents might not have to pay for an A this time.”

Moon can’t help feeling a bit surprised.

So Yasmine’s taking the “be a little nicer” advice to heart, at least. A hint of gratitude toward anyone is a first.

And then the soccer ball comes.

Her panic strips away her new cordiality. Moon knows exactly where her friend’s mind goes.

She’s about to be the “dumb blonde” again—the vapid, useless pretty girl who always has to bribe her way to a pass. And it makes her feel so disgustingly helpless.

“Do you have another one?” A last-ditch attempt to save her grade without her family’s intervention.

As she watches the altercation play out, Moon could slice the tension between Hawk and Demetri with a knife. She’s never quite fancied herself an empath, but there’s something hauntingly familiar about the way Demetri’s entire body is trembling.

She sees herself, hunched up and bawling her eyes out. She sees the overpowering grief that tore free a side Moon didn’t even know she had.

Thank the gods nothing came of that episode.

When Sam arrives, Moon gives her a pleading look. Off she goes to rescue their big-mouthed friend, prepared to cut into Hawk with all the steel Moon could never quite work up.

“Are we gonna fail?”

The whisper in Moon’s ear is so lost. So broken.

Yasmine’s always been a mess. Moon supposes she should be flattered she’s one of the only people who’s ever gotten to see it.

“No.” She sighs. “Demetri’s smart. He’ll figure something out.”

*

“You’ll never guess what I saw yesterday.”

Sam leans over at the start of history class, smirk dancing across her lips.

“What?”

“Yasmine and Demetri are a thing.”

Moon knits her brow, confused.

“What’re you talking about?”

Sam sniggers. “I turned a corner in the hall and saw them making out, clear as day.”

Despite her best efforts, she can’t hide her alarm.

“Oh my god. Does she know he’s…?”

Demetri’s passes at Yasmine weren’t exactly genuine. Moon always thought Yas would be more intuitive about that sort of thing, especially considering the way she talked about Demetri when he first started hanging out with them.

“He’s what?”

“Um…never mind.”

It wasn’t Moon’s place to divulge Demetri’s business, especially when he hadn’t even figured it out himself. Or…didn’t want to admit certain things to himself, at least.

“Yasmine was pissed when Miguel and I caught them,” Sam goes on. “It was so funny. She insisted she’d never go out with him, but…you know. Unless you slipped me some LSD at lunch and I’m hallucinating, I have my doubts.”

She laughs again, clearly tickled pink by the whole thing. Moon only frowns.

“I’m so confused. All she’s ever done is complain about him.”

Her friend shrugs. “Denial’s not just a river in Egypt, I guess.”

“No, like. She thinks basically every single one of his interests is annoying. And she told me once that listening to him talk is like when you hit your brakes too fast and your whole car screeches.”

“Well, you know Yas. She thinks she’ll combust if she says something nice about anyone.”

“Right, but…” Moon narrows her eyes. “She’s picky as hell when it comes to dating. I, um…I would know. And Demetri’s the furthest possible thing from her type.”

“Opposites attract?”

“Not like that. I saw him try to explain basic particle physics to her one time and she nearly went to sleep. And that’s only the tip of the iceberg.”

“Maybe it’s just a physical thing. We both know how crazy hormones can be, right?”

Moon hopes for Yasmine’s sake that Sam is right. Otherwise…

Well, there’s probably no need to entertain that possibility.

*

“I love it when you talk nerdy.”

Moon’s so caught up in Yasmine’s sweeping, graceful movements that it takes a moment for the statement to sink in.

She always smiles when she watches her best friend. She can’t help it. Yasmine moves like a mountain waterfall—majestic and larger than life, all while flowing so seamlessly.

It isn’t until Yasmine lets Demetri pull her in, giggling like an elementary schooler, that Moon’s smile falls.

No, you don’t.

Because Moon knows Yasmine, and she knows she has a hatred for “nerd shit” that could rival Hawk at his worst.

She despises anything that makes her feel small. Unimportant. Insignificant.

Moon remembers the look on Yasmine’s face when Sam leaned away from their popular table, exchanging easy chemistry banter with Aisha. She remembers the dejected pout when lunchroom conversations turned to AP homework, Sam and Demetri so engrossed in what Yasmine called “stupid school garbage” that they forgot the blonde girl was even there.

Because as much as Yasmine makes out like she couldn’t care less about anything, she doesn’t like to be reminded that she isn’t book smart. That the math and science that come naturally to Sam and Aisha and Demetri and even Hawk don’t make a lick of sense to her.

Sure, Demetri’s knowledge was useful when it got Yas a good grade. But on its own?

It only reminds her how inadequate she feels. How inadequate Moon knows she’s always felt.

And it was good, in a way, that Aisha tearing Yasmine’s popularity asunder showed her that the world didn’t revolve around her. But Moon senses the deep hurt Yasmine still carries, seeing glimpses of the worlds she’ll never know how to be part of.

So when Yasmine says she loves Demetri’s “nerdspeak,” lust and desire rolling off her in waves, it feels like she was the victim of some Freaky Friday body swap.

People change. Of course they do.

But not like this. Not enough to forget their very sense of self.

“Save me a seat at lunch? Specifically…this one?”

The smack of Yasmine’s hand hitting Demetri’s asscheek reverberates through the hall. Moon has to laugh at the sheer absurdity.

Yasmine hasn’t lost her fire in some ways, at least.

And Demetri doesn’t seem to mind. Perhaps Moon’s assumption was wrong.

She and Yasmine head off to class, her friend fawning nonstop over her geeky boyfriend. Moon smiles and nods along, pushing down the unease swimming in her chest.

Moon picks up a whiff of Yasmine’s perfume, and realizes that it’s lemonflower.

*

Dragging Yasmine away from Demetri at the prom is like trying to bathe a cat.

Moon finally gets her alone after a few songs, suggesting they grab some punch for Demetri and the others. Yasmine eagerly agrees, her entire being lighting up at the thought of doing her boyfriend even a miniscule favor.

There’s something unsettling in the way it’s so mind-bogglingly different from the Yasmine of a few months ago, who would rather chug drain cleaner Heather Chandler style than revolve her entire being around the needs of some boy.

Maybe there’s a way to breach the subject without arousing suspicion.

“I can’t believe you flew all the way back from Australia.” Moon forces a laugh as she ladles punch into Yasmine’s cup. “I didn’t know you were that into him.”

“Oh, Moon!” Yasmine giggles, leaning her head on Moon’s shoulder. “I’m in love.”

She tries not to think about how soft Yasmine’s hair feels against her skin.

“And the dress, too!” Moon reminds herself that Yasmine is very happily spoken for. “You really went all out. It’s kind of cute how you’re embracing nerddom for him.”

Odd, but cute. That’s what Moon has to tell herself.

“You think he liked it?” Yasmine leaned back, twirling around. “It’s not too much, right? I don’t want to seem like I’m trying too hard to impress him. I know guys aren’t into that kind of thing.”

Moon has to laugh again.

“Since when do you care what guys like?”

“Since I found one worth caring about, obviously.”

She sighs, a faraway look in her gray-green eyes. Perhaps she really is in love.

It’s just that Moon always imagined love would feel deeper than this.

“I’m sure Demetri loved it,” Moon concedes. “He’s really happy you came back for him. I can tell.”

“Funny, when I first showed up, he and Hawk were huddled off in some corner brooding, like the idiots couldn’t just dance with each other if they wanted. Almost felt bad taking Hawk’s boyfriend away.”

She snickers, and Moon feels strange.

She decides to change the subject.

“It’s crazy. I mean, imagine what you would’ve said a year ago if I told you you’d be smitten with Demetri Alexopoulos at junior prom. I remember when we first started talking again, you must’ve bitched for twenty minutes about that time he hit on you at your birthday party.”

Yasmine’s silent for a moment.

“He was being a creep.” There’s a steely edge to her voice that wasn’t there before. “He says he’s been watching me from across the lunchroom and I’m supposed to be flattered by that?! Like, dude, who even are you? Why are you talking to me?”

Moon raises her eyebrows.

“A couple weeks ago in science you were gushing about how sweet the ‘admirer from afar’ thing was.”

“Did I?”

Yasmine scowls in disgust. Just underneath it, Moon could swear she picks up a streak of panic.

“Yeah! He kept blowing you kisses across the room, and you giggled so loud that Mrs. Elmes yelled at you, remember?”

“Oh, god. That’s embarrassing.”

She says it like it’s some undignified moment caught on camera at a party—tripping and spilling her drink on someone, or the like. An odd way to talk about a behavior she has more often than not these days.

“He’s still such a weirdo.” Moon wonders if she’s imagining the trace of the Old Yasmine’s scorn. “He’s so, like, awkward about it when he puts his hands on me to dance. Like he’s scared my weird girl body is gonna burn him like a hot plate or something. I mean, we’ve been dating for four months!”

Moon’s stomach squirms.

“Probably just doesn’t want to do anything you might not be comfortable with,” she says quickly.

“He could freaking ask.” Yasmine curls her lip. “But I don’t even think it’s that. He’s an uncoordinated mess. He can’t dance for shit, and I have to do all the work.”

“Hey, don’t be mean!” Moon elbows her gently. “All this stuff is new to him. He never had a girlfriend before you.”

“Yeah. And it shows. Half the time I can’t even tell if he’s like…enjoying himself, you know?”

Yasmine grunts, reaching up and itching the side of her head. The strobe lights catch on something falling from her hair.

Her expression abruptly shifts.

“Oh, my poor baby!” she gasps. “We’ve been leaving him hanging over there, haven’t we? I miss him already. Come on, I’m gonna cry if we miss the slow dance.”

And just like that, the disdain is gone. Yasmine bustles off, snatching her punch and sweeping back onto the dance floor.

Moon looks down at the table, and her eyes land on a gray feather.

A tiny thing, from a tiny, fierce little bird. Beak hooked, meant for killing and piercing like a raptor. Loud, screaming, crass. Unrefined. Ready to jump to violence at the slightest provocation, especially when it gave them an excuse to show off.

Everything Yasmine isn’t.

And, ironically, everything Demetri wants.

Moon’s gaze drifts back and forth between the dance floor—where Yasmine and Demetri have resumed their grinding—and the corner where Hawk stands alone. Hawk’s eyes don’t leave his best friend once.

And, every once in a while, Demetri looks back. Yasmine is none the wiser.

Moon stiffens, guilt trickling over her like hot wax before a hair removal. She downs the rest of her punch in one gulp before going outside and calling an Uber.

I’m such a fucking bitch.

Whatever Demetri and Yasmine get up to at the afterparty, she doesn’t want to be around for it.

*

“So how are things with Demetri?”

Moon keeps her tone light as they finish their food court tacos, but she sees the new charm bracelet around Yasmine’s wrist. And she knows damn well what that means.

“He’s so annoying.” Yasmine wastes no time diving into a rant. “He never fucking listens. I try to talk about stuff I care about or that I think is interesting, and he’s always acting distracted or changing the subject or whatever. I was telling him this cool thing I read online about the history of georgette skirts, and he didn’t ask a single follow-up question. I’ll bet the world’s shittiest sponge is better at retaining crap than him.”

“Sheesh.” Moon makes a face. “I’m sorry. Boys are the worst sometimes.”

“And that’s not even all.” Apparently Yasmine wasn’t finished. “Not ten minutes later, he’s rambling on and on about this blaster thing he unlocked in some video game. It was the verbal equivalent of having cement poured directly into my brain. And he has the nerve to call me boring?!”

“He did?” Moon scowls, genuinely peeved. “That’s so rude!”

Perhaps Demetri wasn’t as sweet and thoughtful as he always came across.

“Wouldn’t be the first time.” Yasmine frowns right back. “So he gets all snippy with me because he’s being a soggy paper towel of a human being and obviously I’m zoning out. He starts quizzing me on all the dumb bullshit he was blathering about, and I finally snap and tell him he’s boring me out of my fucking mind. And then he gives this whole speech about how at least he’s spending his free time learning strategy and problem-solving and hand-eye coordination, and all I’m doing is looking at clothes online.”

They walk over to the trash and throw out their taco wrappers. With both hands free, Yasmine’s free to gesture more fully and furiously.

“Girl, I got so mad that I called him an antisocial freak and told him he was damn lucky I ever gave him a shot. That was probably kind of messed up, but whatever. Sam doesn’t cut him down to size enough, so I have to pick up the slack. Anyways, I was storming out of the restaurant, but he did the following-and-groveling thing. And sure enough, we ended up at Kay again.”

Yasmine looks down at her bracelet-clogged arm, a forlorn expression swimming over her pretty features.

“I don’t know why I keep letting this happen.” She sighs. “It’s like trying to plug up a boat leak with fucking office tape.”

“Why don’t you break up with him?”

“I wish I could!” Moon’s caught off-guard by the genuine despair lacing Yasmine’s words. “I’ve rehearsed the speech a billion times. But…every time I’m around him, it’s like I’m hit with some kind of emotional tidal wave. And suddenly I can’t bear the thought of ending things.”

She looks so lost. So frantic. So helpless.

“I see him and all I can think about is how much I want him,” she goes on. “No room for anything else. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, and it freaks me out.”

Once upon a time, Moon might have called that love. She knows better now.

She wants to reach across the table and take Yasmine’s hand. Reassure her that this is what overpowering teenage crushes are like. That of course your mind finds ways to make hormones and attraction centered around one person seem like the be-all end-all of everything. Hell, she remembers feeling that way about Hawk before she came down from the high and realized how incompatible they were.

But Moon doesn’t. She can’t.

“Something’s not right with me, Moon.” Yasmine’s voice is quiet and fragile—a tone Moon hasn’t heard for a long time. “Sometimes, I don’t—I don’t feel like myself. You remember that week you were in Cancun? I went to the mall with Sam and Demetri, and Sam was complimenting the lemon balm perfume I had on, but you know I never wear lemon-scented shit. Like what am I, a cleaning product?!”

Moon laughs, gladly taking Yasmine’s implicit offer to lighten the atmosphere.

That was one thing Moon always appreciated about her. She never passed up an opportunity to use snarky bluntness to make a joke out of something unpleasant.

It’s part of why her and Demetri’s connection hadn’t surprised Moon. At least not initially.

The strange thing was that their bond got as far as it did.

“At first I thought it was because something stuck to me when I walked through the perfume section of Macy’s,” Yasmine goes on. “But we all went through there, and I couldn’t smell any lemon shit on Sam and Demetri. Am I going crazy or what?”

Moon pushes away the sinking feeling in her chest.

“Maybe it’s Sam who’s imagining things.”

“That’s what I thought, too.” Yasmine’s voice grows terse with panic. “But then Demetri starts bragging about how I always wear the lemon perfume when I go out on dates with him. With the air of someone who, like, actually believes what they’re saying. And I don’t know what the fuck he’s talking about.”

“Like Demetri knows anything about perfumes. He probably got it mixed up with that bergamot one you like.”

Her reassurance doesn’t appear to work.

“Whatever,” Yasmine huffs. “Let’s talk about something else, yeah?”

Moon lets Demetri slip from the conversation, fading into mental oblivion as they leave the food court and head for H&M. Yasmine brightens almost immediately, losing herself gushing over cute pink dresses and fuzzy purple sweaters and champagne-tinted heels. The afternoon passes easily, sliding in and out of changing rooms and twirling and laughing in front of department store mirrors.

For a while, Moon can almost forget the overpowering fear emanating from her closest friend. She can almost forget feeling like the world’s cruelest sociopath.

*

When Moon knocks on the door to 44101 Portico Place for the first time in months, she’s only half expecting an answer.

It’s 5:00 on a Wednesday, so plenty of time for any after-school extracurriculars to finish up. But, of course, showing up anywhere unannounced always has the potential to go disastrously wrong.

Demetri helped her develop a healthy dose of pessimism. She isn’t sure whether to be grateful.

The door opens after only a couple minutes.

“Moonshine? What’s going on?”

Moon offers a strained smile. “Hey, Pipes.”

Piper frowns at her across the threshold, looking more concerned than angry. It makes Moon feel all the guiltier.

“Is everything okay?” Piper asks.

“Sorry to bother you. It’s—it’s about Yasmine. And you’re one of the only people I felt like I could ask.”

She winces at the flash of hurt in Piper’s face. Her ex leans on the doorframe, crossing her arms and cocking an eyebrow.

“Go on,” she says, tone resigned.

“So…” Moon takes a breath. “Remember when you said you couldn’t be with me until I figured my feelings for Yasmine out?”

“Yeah?”

“I…may have done some light spellcasting and accidentally hexed her into falling in love with a gay guy.”

Piper blinks a few times, taking a moment to process everything. Finally she groans, running a hand over her face.

“Jesus Christ, Moon. Come in—I’ll get us both some fucking edibles for this.”

Piper’s living room is exactly how Moon remembers it—cream-colored couches, tasteful wall décor, chic modern fireplace. A goofy, surfboard-shaped coffee table that Piper’s parents had once tried to sell at a yard sale, but little Piper screamed and cried and beat the ground with her fists until they relented to keeping her favorite piece of furniture.

Now, Moon props her sandaled feet up on a bar that runs underneath it. The metal is cold against her skin.

She tries to focus on that. Sensations in the here and now. Things immediate and tangible.

Not the abstract mess she’s caused.

Piper returns after a few minutes, placing a glass of carrot ginger lemonade and a small gummy on a coaster. Moon picks up the gummy, tentatively taking a nibble.

Piper chuckles. “Don’t worry, it’s not that many mils. I don’t want us to be totally baked.”

Moon takes a more generous bite.

“So.” Piper sits next to her and takes a sip of her own concoction—some kind of purplish whey smoothie. “What did you do?”

Moon gathers her thoughts, working through how best to phrase it.

“You remember when we first met?”

“Sure.” Piper smiles thinly. “Our parents dragged us to that dumb gala, and I found you sobbing your eyes out in the bathroom because your ex-best-friend threw you out like you were nothing. And then I went on to find you have a terrible habit of swooning over the world’s most horrendous shitbags.”

She lets out a small laugh. “I guess so, huh?”

Piper rolls her eyes. “I told you. Over and over and over.”

“I know, I know.” Moon sighs, wearily admitting defeat. “About a week before that party, Yasmine and I had a phone call. And she just…cut into me. Said so many awful things. And I get it. I mean, her sweet sixteen got ruined and then as like…icing on the cake, I ditched her for the people she hated. But I don’t think anyone’s ever broken me down like that before.”

Piper tosses a comforting arm around her shoulder. For a moment, they’re back on tile floors under harsh fluorescent lighting, puffing blunts and snickering about fake people.

“I know,” Piper says softly. “And when I found you, you were still pretty shaken from it. I hope I helped.”

Despite herself, Moon leans into her.

“You helped more than you know.”

“Clearly not enough to stop you from going out and doing some sort of supernatural fuckery.”

Moon laughs softly. “That’s the thing, though. I think it was already too late.”

“What do you mean?”

She takes a breath.

“That night, after Yasmine hung up on me…I don’t know. It felt like my whole life shattered. I guess in a moment of weakness, I pulled out my spellbook.”

Piper narrows her eyes. “You said you only ever used that thing to ‘cleanse the house of bad energy’ or whatever. Or give yourself good luck charms on tests. Not—”

“—cursing people, I know,” Moon finishes. “I was so upset that I wasn’t thinking straight. I recited this whole incantation that was supposed to make Yasmine know how it felt to want someone who would never want her back. And, um…I guess the love gods interpreted that as her getting down bad for a guy who doesn’t even like women.”

“Wait. Isn’t that the same guy who did an MTV-style roast of your weird ex that one time?”

Moon sighs wearily. “That’s Demetri all right.”

“I knew it.” Piper pounds her fist into the couch triumphantly. “Of course he’s gay. Straight dudes don’t pull that kind of petty shit.”

“He’s not exactly subtle, is he?”

“Nope.”

It’s Piper’s turn to sigh, eyeing Moon with an almost pitying look.

“Are you sure Yasmine doesn’t genuinely like him, and just has a shit gaydar? Or she’s really deep in denial? I know I’ve pined after my fair share of straight girls.”

Moon shakes her head. “I second-guessed myself for a long while. Thought maybe I was wrong about Demetri. Or maybe Yasmine had changed so much that she really is into the whole geek shtick now. But…”

She takes a long sip of her carrot ginger lemonade, hoping the intense flavor will somehow give her strength.

“She acts like an entirely different person whenever we’re with him. And…not really in a good ‘he makes her want to be better’ type of way. More like she’s forgotten everything she likes and every aspect of her being that isn’t related to her boyfriend.”

Piper stares at an abstract, avant-garde wall painting, deep in thought.

“Maybe she’s, like, stuck in a codependence loop,” she says. “You said she was pretty clingy with you freshman and sophomore year, right?”

“That was different, though. She acted one way alone with me and one way out in public, sure. But it made sense. Whenever we see Demetri, it’s like Yasmine’s being mind-controlled by one of those thirsty freshmen who think Demetri’s the hottest guy in school because he won a karate fight one time. Then as soon as I get Yas alone, she doesn’t seem to remember half of what she said or did. And when I fill her in, she gets super embarrassed. Not that Yas can’t put on a façade if she needs, but…why would she intentionally make an idiot of herself if she’s gonna be mortified an hour later? She’s not impulsive like that.”

Piper shrugs. “Hormones make people act stupid. I did some truly absurd shit the first time I was trying to get chicks to notice me.”

“Hormones don’t make you go into a weird trance that your brain bleaches right after. People only wish that happened.”

“Maybe Yasmine’s lucky enough to have a brain that can bleach on command,” says Piper cheekily. “Or maybe she’s way too proud to admit she’s being dumb over a boy, so she tries to like…will it out of existence through not acknowledging it.”

“It’s not just about the embarrassment, though.” Moon sucks in her breath. “Every time she realizes about the memory gaps, she’s scared. Like she knows something’s wrong with her.”

Piper groans, leaning back against the couch and sprawling her arms across a cushion. “Can we prove she’s not being a diva? Leave it to Yasmine to make a fucking ocean’s worth of fuss about the same teen angst literally everyone deals with.”

Moon winces at the scorn in Piper’s voice.

It really is a shitty move, asking her ex-girlfriend for help with a girl she knows Piper can’t stand. That Piper has a damn good reason to hate. Assuming the worst about Yasmine’s romance troubles is only fair.

But what other choice did Moon have? It’s not like her scientifically-minded friends, with their AP classes and their blocked chakras, would believe her about a magic spell gone awry.

“She starts smelling like the spell components whenever she’s near Demetri,” Moon says flatly. “And a couple of them came out of her hair. It’s not stuff she’d ever wear otherwise.”

Piper sits back up, suddenly fully alert with her arms crossed.

“You could have led with that.”

“I thought the weird, erratic behavior was more important!”

“As if I’d have a hard time believing that girl would have mood swings.” Piper’s grimace falters slightly as she rolls her eyes. “Like. Moonshine, that’s your type.”

“Shut up!”

Moon swats her. Piper chuckles briefly before her expression grows pained again.

She processes everything for a moment, groaning again and putting her face in her hand.

“Christ, girl,” she mumbles. “If this is real…yeah, that’s a pretty big fuckup. I’m not the biggest Yasmine fan, but yeesh.”

“I know.” Moon makes a face. “Trust me, I never meant to mess with her mind like that, but—”

“—you were hurting so much that you did anyway.”

“…more or less. I think, deep down, I didn’t believe anything would happen. It was to make me feel better in the moment.”

“Yeah, I know you.” Piper looks up, offering her a small smile. “I think you’d have an easier time permanently giving up smoothies than intentionally hurting someone.”

“I just feel so awful!” Moon wails, guilt bubbling up and erupting out of her like a volcano. “I know Yasmine hasn’t been the best person, but she should be able to at least choose who she loves. Even if that’s never going to be me.”

“So…did you come here so I could make you feel better?” Piper scrutinizes her. “Because I won’t lie—I’m kind of at a loss right now.”

“I don’t know.” Moon sighs again. “I came here because you’re the only person I trust who I figured would like…entertain this whole thing. Anyone else would call me crazy.”

Because at the end of the day, Piper may be rough-edged and butch and intimidating, but she’s open-minded. She’s willing to hear anyone’s point of view, and tries to embrace every walk of life. And she’s never one to dismiss possibilities outright, no matter how absurd they sound. No matter how “weird” the people saying them are.

It’s part of what initially drew the two of them together. Well…that and acai bowls.

“Right. So you want solutions.”

It’s almost embarrassing how fast Piper deduces it.

“That…that would be great.”

Piper takes a long sip of her health smoothie, slurps echoing around the room.

“Seems like a proximity thing. You said she acts more lucid when she’s away from Demetri, right?”

“Right.”

“So make plans to hang out, get her alone, and snap her out of it.”

Moon bites her lip. “I’m, uh…not sure how.”

“Demetri makes her act like she’s not herself, so…” Piper shrugs. “Remind her who she really is.”

Moon chuckles hollowly.

“That’s the other thing. I don’t entirely dislike the person she’s become thanks to the…Demetri thing. She’s a lot nicer, for one. And less judgmental.”

Piper seems to be holding back laughter.

“So…you want Yasmine to be her true self and get her free will back and all, but you’re worried that when she does…she’ll be someone you and everyone else will personally find less palatable?”

Moon glowers at her. “Well, when you say it like that, it sounds bad!”

A snicker finally worms its way out.

“Yeah, because it’s an incredibly shady thing to say.”

“You know that’s not what I meant.” Moon huffs. “Look, isn’t there some way to undo the spell without undoing her growth? Because like…in a weird way, I feel like she has grown as a person since she got magicked into being obsessed with Demetri. Is that bad?”

“Not necessarily, but you’re being awfully picky for someone who doesn’t even know if or how they can reverse their own paranormal fuck-up.”

“I thought you might know of a way to do some kind of partial reversal. Make her stop being crazy about Demetri, but keep some of the good ways she’s changed?”

“Sooooo.” Piper slurps more of her smoothie, expression growing insufferably smug. “Considering that fucking around with the nuance of this already-opaque-sounding spell is an objectively terrible idea…the way I see it, you have two options. You can break the spell and let Yasmine be whoever she wants, even if it’s someone who kind of sucks. Or you can leave her to be this weird enigmatic love curse’s braindead meat puppet for the rest of her days—with the perk that she’s more pleasant to be around. So what’s it gonna be, Moonshine?”

“But surely there’s some way to—”

“Uh-uh.” Piper cuts her off. “Look, I don’t know any more about this stuff than you do, but I doubt we’re talking about a spectrum here. Can’t have your cake and eat it too and all that. Either we lift the curse, or we don’t, so…what do you want to do?”

After a long moment, Moon sighs.

“I want Yasmine to be free.”

“So you need to do what I said. Remind her who she really is.”

“Even if…‘who she really is’ turns out to be mean and self-centered and kind of awful?”

“Eeyup. That’s Yasmine. Take her or leave her.”

“Even if it undoes all her personal growth from the last year?”

“That’s the conundrum, isn’t it?” Piper leans nonchalantly against the back of the couch, arm on the headboard. “We don’t know how much of that was the spell, and how much was the real Yasmine wanting to improve herself. So we gotta let the real Yasmine out and hope for the best, yeah?”

Moon looks down at her lap and smiles, shaking her head. “People won’t be too thrilled to have her back.”

“Then that’s going to be her problem, not yours. If you’re such a bitch that you need magic intervention to make you tolerable, then maybe you deserve to lose all your friends.”

It sounds harsh, but Moon can’t argue.

“Hey, c’mon.” Piper scoots over, playfully nudging Moon’s side. “I know how much you cared about her. That’s why it felt like your world was ending when she cut you off. And why you were still hung up on her while we were together. So there must’ve been something in there you thought was worth fighting for.”

And of course there was.

Because this was Yasmine. The same Yasmine who danced like a dork and smiled with dimples as soon as no one was watching. The same Yasmine who yanked Moon into every single one of her snapchat stories, no matter how mundane. The same Yasmine who didn’t think twice about defending Moon’s honor when she thought Sam was talking shit, and told Sam to get the hell out of Moon’s Benz.

The same Yasmine who talked about her and Moon as a single intertwined unit. Unfathomable to her as something that would ever split, until that fateful night on the beach. The same Yasmine who trusted that wherever one of them went, the other would follow.

Sure, there was plenty about her that was cruel and vindictive and conceited. And she’d spent her time at West Valley High so drunk on her own power that she kept digging herself a deeper and deeper grave, earning the hatred of most of her classmates. Good looks could only got you so far when you leaked poison and bile from every pore in your body.

But who is Moon to decide which traits Yasmine gets to keep, and which are magicked away? Who is Moon to remold Yasmine into a watered-down, docile amalgamation of what had once been her assets, when not so long ago, Moon fell in love with the entire picture?

And now Yasmine’s a hollowed-out shell of a person, all empty smiles and lifeless giggles. A painting cobbled together by some computer program—beautiful and polished and splendid on the surface, but a closer look reveals the details are all off.

A closer look reveals something without a soul, no light behind those sharp gray-green eyes.

“Fuck,” Moon says miserably, head sliding into her hands. “I want my best friend back.”

“So go get her back, then.” Piper nudges her again. “And maybe go easy on the evil curses this time? I don’t know, just a suggestion.”

“Oh, stop.” Moon scoffs, but there’s no real venom in it.

Piper rolls her eyes, although not unfondly.

“I wish I’d known you back then.” She laughs, shaking her head. “I could’ve told you from the jump that fucking with the occult was a bad idea. Yes, even when a girl breaks your heart. Which, in my opinion, is the highest and most profound type of pain.”

“Naturally.”

Moon sighs wearily, smile fading.

“I don’t know if anyone could’ve stopped me, honestly. When she—when she broke what we had, it was like I’d fallen into some rushing river and I could barely keep my head up. And I was headed right for one of those tall waterfalls with sharp rocks at the bottom from adventure movies. For whatever reason, lashing out felt like the only way to get a breath of air.”

Piper hums thoughtfully.

“I will say that this all makes me feel better about how I reacted the first time someone rejected me. I liked this girl Lila in the sixth grade, and when she found out, she called me a fat ugly dyke in front of all her friends. So I filled her locker with sweaty gym clothes.”

Moon wrinkles her nose as Piper cackles. “Ew, Pipes! You’re disgusting!”

“Okay, but I don’t summon Satan to make my crush want to fuck a gay guy senseless.”

“I did not summon Satan—”

“Sorry, Satan’s right-hand man Joe the Sexual Orientation Confuser.”

“Imagine if there were demons that actually did that.” The concept is admittedly intriguing. “They get sent up from the underworld or wherever solely to make cosmically cursed straights fall in love with cosmically cursed gays. And cosmically cursed gays fall in love with cosmically cursed straights.”

“Shit.” Piper grimaces again. “Wonder what I did to piss Joe off.”

“You’ve really liked that many straight girls?” Moon has to giggle.

“You have no idea,” Piper mumbles. “And trust me—your ex wasn’t the first guy to assume I played for the other team.”

“Not sure his heart was in that one. I think he wanted get a rise out of me, honestly. No offense.”

“Oh my god. The sheer irony.”

“He really thought I’d get jealous of my own girlfriend. As if there’s any girl I’d care about my unserious two-month fling hitting on.”

And then they’re both laughing, swaying on the couch and clutching at one another to keep from toppling over.

“Hi, I’m your run-of-the-mill punk poser and I think I get more ass than a proctologist!” Piper grabs the couch arm, attempting to do dramatic poses as she talks. “I know you’re frantic to have me back, even though my only skills are yelling and punching my friends for no reason!”

“Stoooop.” Despite herself, Moon only laughs harder. It’s probably just the edible finally kicking in. “You’re so rude!”

“Like your ex even knows how not to be an inappropriate, boundary-crossing weirdo.”

“He’s getting better!”

“Because he’s finally learning after his 7th attempt that asking a girl you just met to fondle your gelled-up hairdo isn’t going to wield results.”

“He wouldn’t—”

“He totally would, though!”

Moon snickers, shaking her head.

“Fine, yeah. He would.”

As the laughter dies down, Piper’s phone buzzes. She picks it up, frowning as she reads a text on her home screen.

“Hey, I gotta run soon. One of the kids from the dojo is hosting pizza night.”

“Oh, right. How’s that going?”

It’s amusing, really, how easy it is to forget Piper’s in Cobra Kai now. If the dojo’s truly the all-powerful, all-corrupting force Eli claims, then Moon’s ex-girlfriend must be entirely immune. Even if she and Piper haven’t spoken in a while, Moon hasn’t seen any evidence whatsoever of Piper caving to some kind of deeply-buried inner asshole.

Not that it was buried too deep, in Eli’s case.

“It’s fun. Good exercise during the gymnastics off-season.” Piper shrugs. “Some of the people in my class take it way too seriously, though. Like it’s high school karate, not the fucking Cuban missile crisis!”

“Yeah, that’s what I’ve heard.” Moon makes a face. “I was…kind of worried for you when I heard you joined. They treat it like a cult.”

“Oh, please.” Piper scoffs. “Like I’d ever buy into those sorts of stupid dramatics. I mean, don’t get me wrong—it can be fun to spar with people who’re so intense about it that they act like their fucking life is on the line. Makes things interesting. But I’m mostly there for the free shit.”

“Really?” Moon cocks an eyebrow. “You always seem so excited on your snapchats.”

“Yeah, like, it’s good energy. Everyone’s super passionate. But it gets to be a little much sometimes, you know? The senseis treat it like this huge life-or-death thing. Like sure, placing in a global tournament would be cool, but it’s not that big a deal? And sometimes I wonder how much my teammates are actually, like, enjoying themselves, and how much they’re stressing over nothing.” Piper purses her lips disdainfully. “Honestly? I’m going to rack up as much free equipment as I can, and then I’m gonna ditch them for Topanga or something. They seem way more chill.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Moon frowns. “I know they can go psycho when someone quits. Look what happened to Hawk.”

“Any of those bitches come at me with a razor and I’ll beat their ass into next week.” Piper rolls her eyes, unfazed.  “And what the hell are the senseis going to do? Call the cops on me for quitting their dojo? They’ll get laughed off the phone.”

“Just…be careful. I don’t want Cobra Kai hurting anyone else I care about.”

Before she can stop herself, she reaches out and squeezes Piper’s hand. The other girl turns and fixes her with a pale green gaze, expression unreadable.

“Okay,” she says quietly, tone turning serious.

Piper’s phone buzzes again, and the moment ends.

“Damn,” she mutters, glancing at her texts. “I forgot I said I’d bring jaeger bombs. I’d better get ready.”

“Oh, sorry.” Moon pulls away, embarrassed. “I don’t mean to take up too much of your time.”

“Don’t worry about it. I hope I could help.”

They stand up, and Piper starts to walk her out. Moon stares at the floor, suddenly feeling anxious again.

She stops right before they reach the front door. “What you said to do with Yasmine…what if it doesn’t work?”

“You better hope it does, because otherwise you’re going to have to consult the dark web or something. And then you’ll have to wade through about 70 sites with the most degenerate porn you’ve ever seen before finding anything useful.”

Moon laughs, tension easing.

“I guess I’ll deal with that when it happens. Or if.”

“Exactly. One thing at a time.”

“Well…I’ll let you go.” Moon offers Piper one last smile, opening the front door. “Have fun at your pizza party, okay?”

She’s halfway onto the porch when Piper catches her wrist, pulling her back.

“Hey, Moonshine…”

She turns. “Yeah?”

“I meant what I said before.” Piper bites her lip, meeting Moon’s eyes nervously. “About, um…if you sort through this whole Yasmine thing, and you ever decide you want to try again…all you have to do is ask.”

The surprise on Moon’s face must throw her for a loop.

“I mean, I’m not saying I’m going to sit on my ass waiting around,” she amends quickly, grip loosening. “I can’t promise I won’t move on. And I’m not, like, some piney mess who’s got nothing better to do than try and ‘win you back’ or whatever. But if you’re ever feeling it, and Yasmine’s not an issue anymore…just ask. The worst I’ll do is say no.”

And before Moon knows what she’s doing, she steps back inside and wraps Piper in a tight hug.

“Thank you,” she murmurs into the thick, bushy hair she remembers loving so much. “For helping. You didn’t have to, and I appreciate it.”

“I know.” Slowly but surely, Piper hugs her back. “But someone has to check you before you cause some domino effect that sends half the school into a sexuality crisis.”

***

Some author's notes, in no particular order:

I will literally die on the hill that Demetri is a bad boyfriend. All he's ever done IN CANON has been to objectify and generally be gross with Yasmine??? And the lead up to the whole icky "sexual venn diagram" comment was basically "hey, you should settle for me because I'm popular now and everyone thinks you're a laughingstock <3" Like wow! What a great way to treat the girl you're supposed to be "101% in love with"! And in S4 onwards he doesn't appear to know jack shit ABOUT her and just puts her on this pedestal as his "dream girl" while never actually mentioning anything about her personality.

I'm honestly not surprised that the natural progression of their relationship in S5 was (most likely) Yasmine getting fed up with Demetri not giving any visible shits about who she is as a person, and getting into fights with him the second she starts asserting her own wants and needs outside of him. And of course he gets her shallow jewelry gifts to placate her, which is just further proof he doesn't know her at all--it reads like he just saw on the internet that "girls like jewelry." And it's not like it actually solves anything, considering he's gotten her so many apology gifts that she can "barely lift her arm"! Tbh it pisses me off to not end that people whine and bitch about Demetri being a "bad friend" (which is so easily disproved it's not even funny) and don't make a peep about the gross way he treats his own fucking canon love interest. Please roast my trash son Demetri Alexopoulos for the RIGHT reasons!!!

I really did my damndest to keep Yasmine as canon-compliant as possible here. I do think she and Moon messed around in S1 and no one will ever be able to convince me otherwise, but I tried to keep everything we see of her here consistent with how she acts onscreen in seasons 1, 3, and 5. Season 4 is the obvious odd man out, which...needless to say is kinda the point XD But you take S4 out of the mix and accept some weird fluke was going on that was making her act that way, and we get something semi-plausible to work with! Hopefully she comes across as in-character (from what little we see of her!) here.

Also she does not love it when Demetri talks nerdy. Aisha and Sam's S1 salt conversation proves that she is not about it when people talk about nerdy school-related shit that reads like an inside joke she can't get in on (which applies to...most school-related things, considering she's shown to be kind of book dumb). She loves when Demetri gets her good grades, but she doesn't like. Have any inherent interest in school-related "nerdy" things??? And has never been shown to??? "Character development" shouldn't come out of nowhere and involve characters randomly getting into things they have never been shown to be drawn to actually!

I also hope I did an okay job writing Piper here! I wish I could write more MoonPiper, but we get!!! So ANNOYINGLY little of them and of Piper in general??? Like seriously, I went back and rewatched all the Piper scenes in the show, and there's like. Maybe 5 or 6 in THE WHOLE SHOW??? I barely have anything to work with and it is AGGRAVATING because I really love Piper and MoonPiper as a ship!!! And I want to do it justice that isn't just me projecting my own headcanons and theories because I don't know what else to do!!!

I really do think Piper is Not As Invested in Cobra Kai as everyone else though, lmao. Like she is there for shits and giggles, and also free merch. She respects herself too much to become a slave to the "cobra kai for life" bullshit lol

It IS incredibly funny to me that Moon gets more homoerotic scenes with her Super Totally Straight Best Friend than with the girl who was canonically her girlfriend. Like I love both ships, I really do, but when they give Yas and Moon SO many fruity scenes while their boyfriends are also being fruity, what did they EXPECT!!! Of COURSE I'm going to write YasMoon like my life depends on it!!!

Also, Moon saw that nacho nonsense with Hawk and Demetri in S2. She saw Hawk yank Demetri onstage during Valley Fest. She saw Hawk get all snippy about Demetri hitting on girls at the beach. She saw Hawk throw a hissy fit because his boyfriend bestie wouldn't join his evil dojo. She damn well knows they're gay!

And so does Piper ajadhskufbhd these girls weren't born yesterday!

Hoping to get this entire fic up on AO3 sometime in November! :3

[that-left-turn]

Shipping is fun and it gets the fandom involved but when the fandom tries to force others to think their way or fights with the studios or the actors that’s the real cringefest. Us carylers need to stop creating friction and enemies by being negative with others who don’t agree with what we see. Or use slightly racist rhetoric which I take offense too as my adopted son and daughter are Vietnamese. No one thought my wife and I were a romantic fit but we were until we weren’t so no one had to see it or agree but us. that’s what my last anon ask was about. we make ourselves look stupid when we pick apart stuff like the big 3 thing. That’s meaningless bs that makes us look bitter and crazy and like canon is all that matter when we all know we may not ever get canon anyway. I’m an old x files shipper who knows how ridiculously fun but bad this can get especially if we let the bitter people who fight about everything that doesn’t match their vision for our ship make everyone hate us We can’t have nice things if we make everyone hate us including the actors and studios

I'm not the best person to speak on fandom politics because I don't really participate. (I post fic very occasionally and I have this blog.) It feels like a waste of time I don’t have—I’d rather be writing said fic than argue with strangers about something as subjective as what TV characters to like. I have posted about racism before and my short-version take on bigotry is: it's not okay, regardless of who happens to share their casual -isms with the crowd.

I have a huge issue with the recent interviews Norman did in Japan. It's problematic to say that, because “we” (what ‘we’ is that, Norman?) wanted to write a ‘real’ French show, the WOC showrunner got fired in favor of a white American man. I’m confused: what uniquely qualifies Zabel over Kang? 👀

In one of the after-episode snippets, Clémence said the show has “all the French cliches.” (I wish I could post a link, but I don't have time to search. If someone knows where to find it online, please let me know?) S1 has all the American jingoistic tropes and the French characters act culturally American. With streaming services offering a variety of European TV shows, anyone can do a comparison to see if DD feels more French/European (like Norman claims) or like prettied-up American network TV.

I'm aware of the “big 3” debacle and disliked the incendiary nature of Valhalla’s post. I also disliked that some fans went out of their way to replace Michonne because of course there can only be one girl who's important 🙄 There appears to be a lot of internalized misogyny in the fandom. Both women are vital to the franchise, and Gabriel's character development was amazing and brilliantly acted too, so why doesn't he make the big three? Rankings are useless because they're arbitrary and encourage division between fans. A fractured audience is not a good thing.

Studios don't hate anyone. It’s a business and the programming execs spend zero seconds pondering what fans say. That's a different department, but I’m not sure AMC employs qualified marketing strategists. The official SM accounts look like they’re run by interns with “on the job” training. Part of the (legacy) issue is that under a previous showrunner for the flagship show, this dog-eats-dog behavior was encouraged simply because it mirrored the bleak setting of TWD. It's not an ethical approach, nor is it a good ROI to scare away the people who’d pay for merchandise and provide good word-of-mouth for the show(s).

The DD EPs want to make a show they think looks cool/epic—it's all about the visual esthetic and some of them are so burnt out they don't even care about the plot at all. A fanfic author writes to please themselves, but a screenwriter has to please their audience. The viewership are paying customers, so they have the right to an opinion on what they're willing to buy. I'm deeply uncomfortable with the idea that women should be quiet and behave like good little girls, so the men in charge might reward us with “nice things.” I’ve seen that show before and there’s no treat awaiting the docile at the end.

Based on the latest slew of interviews, the buzzword du jour seems to have moved on from ‘cool’ and ‘epic’ (probably because they gained ridicule instead of traction) to ‘romantic.’ It's a hard sales pitch to the very audience Norman normally complains about. The ‘crazy and bitter’ women of the fandom are the proverbial hand that feeds him and he needs their approval, not the other way around.

I'm aware, though, that some fandom behavior has spiraled into a never-ending ship war. That's the environment AMC/TWDU has created by not encouraging an atmosphere where they lift up all their characters and by not writing female friendships into the show. Everyone's worst side is on display and nobody “wins.”

[lastweeksshirttonight]

I've been recapping Strike Force Five both for my followers who can't access or don't really have time to listen to the episodes, and also for myself to get more comfortable with longform writing, something I was doing as well with reviews of S1 episodes of Last Week Tonight. (I promise I will keep doing those, I know they keep falling by the wayside.) Going into episode three of the show, I know I have to address Jimmy Fallon and his toxic workplace, the news of which dropped as I was listening to the third episode of SFF for the first time. Putting this below the cut, and I'm going to be mentioning toxic workplaces, alcoholism, and maybe getting more personal than I need to again, so trigger warning for those.

To start, every worker deserves a safe, non-toxic workplace. This is the LEAST a company can do for their employees as far as I'm concerned. The things a toxic workplace will do to your mental and physical health are things I don't wish on anyone, and things I'm still wrestling with after being two years removed from one of the worst environments I was ever in. The stories that Fallon's staffers tell ring extremely true, from weaponized HR to cruel, dehumanizing showrunners/CEOs, and crying rooms. I want the best for them and hope, despite the very bad "I'm sorry if you were offended" apologies given by NBC staff and Fallon, that there are concrete efforts taken to provide them with a much better, safer workplace. Those apologies don't give me much hope right now, unfortunately.

The other thing is that I really hope Fallon commits to some sort of treatment for his obvious alcoholism. It's been an open secret for decades at this point - the article dances around it but anyone with even a modicum of knowledge about the New York comedy scene knows this. Again, I don't wish alcoholism on anyone. It's a horrible, destructive disease. But I don't think that the culture rot at Late Night can be fully addressed unless Fallon makes an effort to get help.

I've struggled with excessive social drinking and alcoholism runs in my family. It's almost impossible to get out of that hole until you realize you need to make the change. I hope this is the push to get him out of that hole. This isn't me trying to avoid holding him accountable for his part in making his show so toxic, far from it. This is me, coming from a similar place where I had to work incredibly hard to rebuild my life because of the shitstain behavior I perpetuated while drunk, recognizing someone that needs to do the same work to make things right in some way.

I thought about making this part of the recap for Strike Force Five episode 3, but it didn't feel appropriate. I don't know if I will recap the third episode, honestly, and if I do, it won't likely be for a bit, or at least until I know what the future of this podcast is. Last week, episodes dropped on Wednesday and Saturday, and there's noticeably no fourth episode as of today (Sunday). The part of this that sucks is that listening to the show DOES help the staff of all these late-night shows monetarily, including Fallon's, and I want to continue to support them. (Because it will come up, I do financially donate to multiple strike funds as well. You should do the same, if you're in a position to.) It's, understandably, a mess.

In the end, I just really want things to improve for Fallon's staff. It'll take a lot of work, but it's not impossible to turn things around.

[lily-orchard-gossip-blog]

I feel like Lily doesn't understand how gross it is to say anyone who likes Hunter is a white supremacist. My father is part of a white supremacist Asatru cult. I was raised in that. No one in those circles would watch The Owl House at all because it has Luz as the main character, period, end of discussion. You know what people in those circles DO do in response to shows like TOH? They reblog posts about how bad it is, they tell other people IRL about horrible things in the show that may/may not be there, they try to make it fail and create a public backlash so it gets canceled. They try to make other people give up on it and get into shows with white male leads instead.

A lot of people in my dad's social circles loved Lily's video on Steven Universe, not because they agree with anything she said, but because it got people to drop a show full of POC and racially coded POC characters, and because she was tearing down a Jewish showrunner. They shared it on their social media not because they're woke but because many of them are not open about their beliefs and videos by a "Native American" trans woman decrying a queer POC-heavy show is a good smokescreen for them.

And if she had any relevance these days or her videos weren't so rambling, takes like 'you need to stop liking TOH, people in the fandom are white supremaicsts' would be getting passed on from people in those circles because it'd help kill the fandom for another POC heavy queer show.

In the same way that people my dad knows use people like Candace Owens and Ben Shapiro to feign that they don't hate minorities while signal-boosting people who are anti-black, anti-queer and have internalized bigotry in order to get those anti-progressive messages out there, Lily is very useful for white supremacists in the animation fandom - of which there are many, speaking from experience.

Lily sounds more like my dad than she does anyone who ever showed up to counter-protest a white power demonstration. I know, because until my mother got custody of me last year (I'm 16), I had to attend those, even though I didn't agree, because my dad would've beaten the shit out of me if he'd ever gotten any inkling I hadn't been sufficiently brainwashed.

Sorry for the lengthy vent post. I just find this rhetoric so dangerous. I don't know if she knows the hands she's playing into but it's bad either way.

.

[clarajohnson]

the magicians s1e13

yes i put this one off i wasn't ready yet

i love when the recaps just give everything away it's so cute of them ohhhh the watcherwoman you say? god i wonder who that is. oh jane chatwin is important you say? that's interesting.

i love that q gets into fillory and within days is like alright guess i should write an unauthorized sequel to fillory and further

"no, i just stabbed my own hand" YOU wanted the fantasy protagonist lifestyle YOU have to deal with the common risk of blood sacrifice

BOOOOO FUCK YOU EMBER EVERYBODY HATES EMBER

loveeeee the .02% opium also love "a pretty unfair way to get you to love a place" i love the way he thinks of things you neurotic little freak

NOTHING better than the way q says "nnnnbitches" in i am in that scene, bitches

(speaking to the magicians showrunners) by all means, hinge your entire quest on a traumatized boy

every knife scene is a tease until my beloved wife fen appears

you are from a place that likes murder!

it is so obvious as to almost be lazy that the watcherwoman would be q's favorite fillory villain

jesus christ i love that q is the volunteer tomato. he would be. he really would be, he cannot resist jumping into danger if the purpose is to save the things he loves.

the memory patch :-((((((

"margo being such a bitch." oh eliot waugh you are so dear to me

q's narration is pretty fun for this episode i like it quite a bit

this is a funny stage of the team assembly, the way they resist julia's inclusion when actually julia is going to be very important to everyone (i am making this up just because i like julia)

the leo blade is pretty sexy i appreciate it

TIME FOR FEN

oh wait i forgot it's a different fen :-( see you soon my beloved

"i admit i was 100% sure that i was definitely the high king. i know! shocking, right?" fucking crazy that we have to watch him experience total ego death while eliot is making stoner jokes

season one eliot still agreeing to marry fen despite all the fine print is so shocking when you think about it, like, i forget the kind of guy he starts out as, and the "my life, it doesn't work" speech is like a total shove into character development that moves so quickly and immediately blooms and is so instantly rewarding. man when this show is good it's good.

"i think you're the only person that i can stand"

these chapter titles make me believe that q is not a good writer. i imagine his fillory fics were not highly rated.

"father-in-law, why is this blade a thousand degrees?"

mrs. me !!!!!

i will say this. and this is a kind of spoilsport opinion i know this. i do not like the whole ember's jizz plot and i find it very gross and demeaning and unnecessary, not that any of this is necessary, just that this specific element feels chosen to be a gross-out.

"can you be the champion we've been waiting for? "i want to be." whew there it is!

ONCE AGAIN FUCK EMBER FUCK EMBER FOREVER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

me when i hate the character the show wants me to hate :-o >:-(

i completely forgot plover was in the dungeon lmao you know what let martin be a little bit more of the beast !!!!!! yeah poor you !!!!

most pathetic boy in the world voice: i know you don't want to hear it right now but i love you

quentin coldwater has the craziest fucking self-esteem anyone has ever had it goes in all directions and fluctuates hourly

you're not as good as i hoped, quentin coldwater.

please not the glowing eyes jesus christ

whewwwwwwwwww the reynard scene is always going to get to me sooooo fucking bad jesus jesus jesus

"trickster of the faithful and the pure of heart" i gotta be honest i don't know what mythology reynard is part of but i don't know what the purpose of a god like that would be. this guy seems like a burnt pancake to me.

horrible. horrible!

it's so wild that she called marina. i like that she did that i just think it's crazy. and it's a really interesting aspect of marina's character too! "jesus, julia, i wanna help." the girl is not an asshole we just hate women with boundaries JOKING she IS an asshole but i do think sometimes women are allowed to be.

love that penny expands his powers with stick-and-pokes

i believe, because i want to, that there is some significance to julia going into the wellspring last.

i forgot martin is UGGOOOOO

you know i think the way this show frames the forty timelines, for q at least, is as a kind of suicide mission, which i really feel like pushing against. i don't see q as a character outlined by despair or futility i think he's all about hope and perseverance and i think that's beautiful and it's what i want for him!

shit i completely forgot about jules teaming up with the beast for a minute oh julia you're a crazy lady

shows don't have the kind of security to end a season with five out of six main characters bleeding out and absolutely no resolution anymore

[chaifootsteps]

(long ask, sorry!) the new media HH/HB thread on TV Tropes is doing the 'Viv gets scorn no matter what because she's a queer woman who makes things' routine atm (they're blaming TADC fans for toxicity and discussing the 'write like HB' trend, for context)

I've definitely seen creators (anyone, really) get far more hate online when they're female for stupid reasons, but it's frustrating to see them do the 'Viv can't win no matter what she does' thing because I can't really think of an instance where she hasn't responded to criticism she doesn't like, or has actually tried behaving like a professional for a minute - even some of her fans on subreddits have said she needs to step away from Twitter for her reputation's sake or hire someone for PR.

The reason she 'can't win' is not because she's a woman - she's not Rebecca Sugar and she's not Tracy Butler who know how to behave professionally (and before Viv started mudslinging at Lackadaisy, neither Tracy nor the LD crew had any drama attached to them despite Tracy being a woman herself... curious)

Viv's a creator who acts as though she doesn't have the confidence to let her work stand on its own merits and can't bring herself to ignore criticism (given she seems to disagree with practically all of it; the only thing I've seen Spindlehorse try to improve is not using red as a bg color so much and cutting down on the constant sound effects), & as a result she has cultivated a fandom who feel rewarded when they make tweets either defending her or explaining the show on her behalf because she keeps liking those tweets, which only makes it happen more. the lack of distance she keeps from her fans and the way she actively rewards the ones who put down criticism of her makes them act like she's their friend instead of someone whose show they like and someone who is actively using them as both a shield & sword. This is why the fandom has a bad rep, it's not just that the Hellaverse shows suck - it's that their creator will paint all criticisms as bad faith and only makes the effort to address fans not when they harass, bully or threaten people, but when they do something that affects her personally (like celebrate a ship on the same day as her birthday). and I understand social media feels like overwhelming toxic noise: but that's why creators need to learn to step back and not engage so much. enabling toxic fans aside, this level of enmeshment strikes me as bad for anyone looking to hone their craft and create something meaningful

as much as I want to offer some pushback in that thread I feel the plagiarism accusations will be immediately downplayed or ignored and any mention of bad pay or treatment in the workplace will be met with accusations of 'debunked!!' or 'some of the reviews were fake therefore all of them are, even the ones that line up with consistent accounts of bullying or misgendering or a pattern of no deadlines being given!!' asking 'I don't understand what she's done to attract this level of vitriol' kind of suggests they haven't looked that hard or listened to anyone who would want to tell them

but if I was to put it to them, I think I would say - Viv will 'win' when she behaves like a professional, credits people properly, doesn't just drop people when they're no longer useful, stops burning bridges with other people working in the indie animation space, stops vaguing and painting all criticisms as bad faith and understands that even behaving professionally will not make people stop criticizing her show, because every artist in the world has to deal with the fact that people will want to discuss and critique their work. and though I doubt the writing on her shows would ever improve, I'm sure people would at least respect her trying to act more like the professional showrunner she's supposed to be. no one can 100% control their own narrative with her level of Internet fame, but the best way not to make it actively worse is to stop trying to imo

Agreed, and also I feel like it's been years since TvTropes was right about anything. Although even the Viv pages on TvTropes have been very slowly getting more and more critical.

[ivashkovadrian]

I have a feeling that all these leaked info about Henry Cavill and the attempt by the writers to paint Lauren Schmidt Hissrich as the best showrunner ever with no mistakes will backfire at them badly. We all had problems with s2, you too mentioned that they made some bad decisions, to try and defend everything and blame the fans who didn't get it or we are the minority or Cavill who tried to overruled them will only piss his fan base even more (and I think they underestimate how big it is) not to mention the book and game fans - if they are still watching after s3 - and they'll boycott the show. A nice word, "he is going to be missed but we hope we can continue and do better with the support of the fans" etc would give them at least a chance. Now I think the show is doomed and it's sad for the other actors.

I'm pretty sure it already backfired at them to some extent! Because a lot of fans are pissed. Henry was the heart of the show not because he played its lead but because he knows the story so well. There was a change.org petition that appeared shortly after the announcement and it gathered quickly enough tens of thousands of signatures!

Changing your lead and title actor three seasons in, for what seems to be no dire reason (i'm thinking of the tv show Spartacus where, I guess you might already know, they had to recast the lead actor because he was extremely sick and he did pass away very little after), is a massive red flag. Mishandling the fanbase afterwards? Bad bad bad bad. And we have to remember that Henry had said he was all in for the show's 7-8 seasons (according to the writers' plan) on the condition they respect the books. It reallyyyyyy doesn't take a genius to figure out something went awry, it isn't about just a DC paycheck (and that went down the drain).

I don't know if something new happened/leaked that prompted this ask (i am out of the loop about almost anything nowadays). The show is in no way perfect, and s2 truly is proof of that...i don't know the games nor the books but Yen's plot was horrendous in many ways, and when we hear that they initially wanted to make Roach's death a comedic scene.........yeah, NO.

I know I will watch s3. Many will, I believe. Beyond that...I am not so sure. And i fully agree it is a shame for the other actors. Anya is MAGNIFICENT as Yen, Freya is amazing, anyone can tell Joey was made for this role, and all the rest!!! Myanna and Anna are utterly killing it. I could go on (Francesca's actress who's doing a terrific job DESPITE BEING!!! WHITEWASHED!!!! Mahesh Jadu!!! Or the actor playing Stregobor--you want to beat him up SO BAD). I do hope they will all get more time to shine with proper storytelling

let's enjoy s3 as much as we can, at least we're not saying goodbye just yet...