#i fear michael and i are bffs now! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

dreamkidddream · 4 years

Note

I absolutely loved the doll! mc one with the brothers and diavolo. Could I ask for the same idea with the rest of the undateables and luke? If it isn't too much though. Thank you very much, don't forget to take care of yourself and stay hydrated!

I’m glad you enjoyed the first part!! I hope you’re staying safe through this pandemic and that you’re drinking plenty of water. I’m so happy that people liked the Doll!MC scenario so much (it even became one of my top posts and I was NEVER expecting that to happen 😳 click here to read it with the Bros and Diavolo). I got an UR card for Barbatos today and immediately thought back to this scenario cause I was just imagining the different situations with Doll!MC. Hope you enjoy!

Also, Luke’s part is strictly platonic, just FYI!

The Undateables (Minus Diavolo) with Doll!MC

Barbatos

Let me just say, you make this man’s day so much better

Your presence is just so calming for him. You could just be standing there (which is heavily enforced in the kitchen), not doing anything, and he would still be fully relaxed

Definitely loves you being in the kitchen with him, and will find ways to invite you so that you guys can spend time together

“MC, the young master has a tea party planned for this afternoon, and I’m afraid I may need your assistance to help prepare.”

“But Barb, I thought you didn’t want me touching anything-”

“I don’t want you touching anything that can cause you harm. I can easily handle the labor, but I do have a task for you...”

Cue to you sitting perfectly still and taste testing his sweets

“Barb, are you sure that I’m helping you like this? I don’t want to be useless to you!”

“Nonsense, MC. This is perfect. I needed someone with an exceptional palette, and you’re just the right person for me.”

Just you and him, and his sweet creations. What more could he ask for?

Maybe being in a relationship with you, but he is very sure that it’s going to be happening in the near future...and he didn’t even have to use his powers to know that

He stares at you a lot. He can’t help it, he loves to just admire you!

Barbatos is the type of guy where he doesn’t have to rely on words to express his love. His love language is acts of service: packing you lunch and extra sweets every week, giving you recipes that he wouldn’t even share with Luke, and gifting you mini accessories that you can wear with your outfits!

He gave you this adorable three-legged crow holding a cupcake hairpin and you’ve been wearing it ever since

He tries to hide his blush everytime he sees you and now he has to work even harder because of the pin lmao

HAVING YOUR OWN TEA PARTIES WEEKLY

You both have a designated day and time where you don’t plan anything in order to have your own tea parties

No Diavolo, no noisy demon brothers, no other exchange students (sorry Luke). Just you and him, enjoying each other’s company and him basking in your glow

If someone did try to harm you, he would already know of it and properly disposes of the problem. Lord Diavolo can’t afford to have any issues interfering with the exchange program, and he can’t afford to have anything happen to you so...no harm no foul, right?

Please continue to do what you’re doing MC. Stare at him with your bright, doe eyes and give him that lively smile everytime. It makes his day go by much easier, especially since he knows that you’ll still be there, waiting for him with your own desserts and that smile reserved just for him

Simeon

Was convinced that you were an angel

Lowkey still convinced that you’re an angel

Really, you just look so...angelic

Wasn’t upset when you revealed that you were in fact human; he was happy because this meant that he could show you around the Celestial Realm!

Speaking of Celestial Realm, be prepared for Simeon to be your very own personal tour guide everytime. This could be your 50th time up there and he’ll still try to point new things out

“And over here is-”

“Michael’s favorite resting place, since the lilies always seem to bloom whenever he’s around,” you giggled. “I remember Simeon, you tell me this everytime we visit!”

He’s a tad embarrassed

“Forgive me, MC. It seems that I get so elated over the fact that you’re here with me, I tend to repeat some things over.”

“That’s okay! I still have fun with you everytime!”

Oh MC, you’re too adorable!

Which causes him to worry over you. While he knows that the brothers and Diavolo (along with Barbatos) wouldn’t dare cause you any distress, the same couldn’t be said for the other demons lurking around, both in and out of RAD

But not to fear, Simeon your friendly guardian angel is here!

I am so sorry for the rhyme lmao

He may not have been personally assigned to you, but that doesn’t mean he can just let anything happen to you! He’s only doing his heavenly duties in protecting you! He’s also being a good friend by watching over you too, his little lamb

He wouldn’t attack anyone, but if he made a complaint or a very serious concern to the right person (Lucifer or Diavolo), consider the problem handled

You have your own tea time as well, and Luke would join you sometimes. But, every now and then, Luke would have to finish some homework or study, or Barbatos would miraculously call for him at the castle, or if it was just too late and Luke just had to go to sleep, then it would just be you two. Sitting by the fireplace, discussing matters ranging from RAD to your life in the human world, drinking tea that you would take turns preparing

Not to mention the downright dainty little cakes you would bring. One time you brought him angel cakes and he found so lighthearted and precious that he requested you bring them everytime, just for him

May or may not base a character in his new story around you

Simeon wants to shield you from the horrors that are surrounding you both. You’re so pure, he just wants you safe. From the way that you would dress to the way that your eyes would just look so amazed and innocent at him, he just knows that he needs to watch over you, always. The brothers do get a little wary when they see how much time you do spend at Purgatory Hall, but they know that Simeon couldn’t possibly have feelings for you, and you were always so giddy after leaving there, they couldn’t bring themselves to say anything

And Simeon knew that he was starting to feel more than he should. He couldn’t profess his love for you now in risk of falling, but he can wait until you get your wings. Just imagining you in your cute little Ceslestial Realm outfit (which he hopes still mimicked your current style) with your very own beaming halo was enough to keep him waiting and to make sure that you stayed on the right path

He deemed that you were worth the wait

Luke

BFFs! BFFs!

When he first saw you he could just cry

Someone innocent like you got sent down here with these monsters?! He had to keep you safe!!!

Simeon thought you were angel and then realized that you were not; Luke thought you were an angel and refused to believe that you weren’t

You didn’t have it in you to burst his bubble so soon, so you just let him run with it until Simon broke the news

It was like telling a kid that Santa Claus wasn’t real; you can only imagine how Luke took the revelation

Not well from what Solomon told you. Simeon kept saying he just needs some time to process things, and you just felt so awful about the whole thing

Which lead to you bringing him so much sweets that it made Beel jealous and very upset

But we all know how Beel can be around food, so it wasn’t a huge surprise. He chased you around all day and you had to use your pact to get him to stop!

And you promised to make him double the sweets in he forgave you so all is well

Luke was still obviously sad, but he wasn’t going to stay sad forever. Especially not after you brought this many sweets just for him!

Lucifer was not a happy demon when Simeon arrived at the HoL’s doorstep with you groaning and clutching your stomach. And Solomon took so many pictures of Luke while he passed out from his sugar high that he dedicated a whole album in his phone to it

Favorite activity to do together: Baking! (Obviously)

Trading recipes, shopping for ingredients together, baking things for each other to try (where really it was just to have double the desserts)

When you two are in the kitchen together, no one else is allowed (except for Simeon, but only if he’s looking and not touching). It’s now MC and Luke time, everybody else is gonna have to wait!

Luke only wants you to do the the activities that he sees as harmless: which is everything that doesn’t include sharp items and anything else that can hurt you

“MC get away from that! That can seriously hurt you! Let me get it for you instead!

“Luke, honey, it’s just an oven it’s not my first time using one-”

Too late, he already took it out of your hands into his own, mitts already on

Speaking of oven mitts

You guys have matching aprons and mitts!!

Barbatos may be a little bit jealous, but he likes the bond that you two have. And he knows that Luke won’t be a romantic rival so he’s alright lol

Luke is your deemed protector/bodyguard, and he proudly wears the title since no one bothers you because of him (or so he thinks). Everyone makes fun of him calling him a chihuahua, but jokes on him, when Luke complains, he complains

Won’t take long for Simeon or even one of the brothers to pick up on his whines complaints if he thinks someone is bothering you

Luke believes that while he’s small, he can protect you and try to keep you free from danger. He may be young, but he sees himself as the older brother out of you both (even though it’s really you being the older sibling and him being the baby). Always looking out for you especially since you’re too fragile to be left alone!

You’re one of the only people that genuinely likes him and don’t make fun of him. You’re dear to him MC, please don’t ever change!

Also, he definitely talks to Michael about you all the time so excitedly and sends him sweets that you both made together. Michael is a proud dad at this point

Solomon

Knew you wasn’t a doll but loved to tease you about being one anyway

Was there a spell that can really turn you into a doll? You wouldn’t mind if he tried it out on you, right MC?

Don’t tempt him please because he WILL do it

“Tell me, MC. Hypothetically speaking, if I were to purchase-”

“No Solomon, you can’t shrink me down to fit me into a dollhouse, no matter how nice it sounds. Besides, I can’t bake in a dollhouse, the oven wouldn’t work!”

“I can fix that.”

You’re very amusing to him for some reason. Was it because of how doll-like you are? The fairytale way that you dressed? How you were still human and was able to live with seven of the most powerful demons and not die? Maybe it’s the way that you still radiated such positivity despite being in literal Hell?

Honestly all of the above

TEACHING HIM HOW TO COOK/BAKE

Poor Solomon doesn’t realize that his cooking isn’t...the best

And you took the best approach in helping him atleast cook something that looks edible

You didn’t say his cooking was disgusting like some people (literally everyone else), so he took that you giving him lessons was a date of sorts

He wasn’t complaining. Your time spent in the kitchen was scenes straight of a romcom (no matter how cheesy it sounds); his arms wrapped around your waist and dotting icing on your pretty nose

May or may not have licked some icing off of you at one point, will definitely do it again

Solomon is a very confident man, borderline arrogant (Oh who am I kidding he IS arrogant). So yes, while people may see you as an easy target, he’s here to remind them that you’re not. And that if they want to try, chances are they won’t be walking away in one piece

He’s powerful, too powerful in fact. He may not be the strongest physically, but if even the entire student council recognizes his knowledge and what he’s capable of, no one should be dumb enough to test him (keyword: try)

But he wouldn’t mind showing off if it’s for you

You’re one of the only beings to ever peak Solomon’s interest genuinely. Yes, he loved to tease and bug you whenever he pleased, but you also made him want to come around you more and more. He was drawn to you, and that doesn’t happen a lot with him (at least without ulterior motives)

*coughcough* making pacts *coughcough*

You were the only thing that made Solomon feel weak, but that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Don’t get him wrong, he’s still The Greatest Sorcerer, but he couldn’t help but feel himself get weak in the knees when you gazed at him with so much sincerity. He loves it and loves you

Once your back in the human world, he’s going to be so selfish with you. I mean, he already kinda was now, but this time there won’t be any interruptions or distractions around to take your attention

Us humans have to stick together, and what better way to stick together than to be together, wouldn’t you say MC?

#obey me x reader #obey me reader insert #obey me undateables #undateables x reader #obey me #obey me swd #obey me shall we date #obey me one master to rule them all #barbatos x reader #barbatos x mc #obey me barbatos #obey me solomon #solomon x reader #solomon x mc #simeon x reader #simeon x mc #obey me simeon #obey me luke #luke is baby

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trystcnthorne · 2 years

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choices li tag game

got tagged by my bff @bryceslahela love u babes <3 (not tagging anyone else i’m lazy)

the freshman series - kaitlyn at first then i dumped her for zig my prince <3

tc&tf - kenna dated val dom dated sei

most wanted - dilf dave and milf sam endgame

rules of engagement - mc dated leo, the brother with elena, party twin with chef mira and loser twin with annoying audrey they deserve each other

endless summer - ESTELABEAR

love hacks - ben… but brooke in my heart

the haunting of bw manor - my ghost gf eleanor

the royal romance - king liam FUCK THE REST! (not u hanakins)

hero - both kenji and eva i’m a whore i fear

high school story - michael harrison

it lives in the woods - i didn’t care for the romances but ava

it lives beneath - again i didn’t care but danni i guess

home for the holidays - fuck this book

red carpet diaries - my queenie victoria

perfect match - hayden was my main damien and alana were my sidechicks i love being a pixel whore

bloodbound - KAMILAH MY GODDESS

veil of secrets - flynn, he repulses me now

america’s most eligible - mackenzie/beautiful contestant. i also did a dump adam for goddess bianca route

desire and decorum - ANNABELLE PARSONS… SUCH AN UNDERRATED ROUTE

across the void - i hate this book so much and the siblings lis but i chose kepler for mc

big sky country - i hate all of them but i chose juliette

the elementalists - shreya mistry

a courtesan of rome - i’ve romanced both syphax and sabina

the heist: monaco - MY PRINCESS SONIA ENEMIES TO LOVERS EXCELLENCE

ride or die - colt kaneko

open heart - jackie varma

passport to romance - i didn’t care abt any of them but i picked marisa

wishful thinking - was whoring between anna jaime and ellen

nightbound - all boring, i chose katherine

platinum - RALEIGH MY BF

sunkissed - eliana flores. barely had scenes but she was so cute

bachelorette party - ash, he was the best of the bunch i fear

mother of the year - levi but i kinda wish i did a thomas route

save the date - simon hendricks. hate this book and justin btw

the royal masquerade - male!asian hunter was very cute but black!female kayden was too gorgeous i can’t

baby bump - mr. convington. i changed his name to james bc clint is a fugly name. i hate this bitch but i hate the mayor even more

hot couture - luz but it should’ve been milf hazel

with every heartbeat - rip dakota 😔🙏

blades of light and shadow - malkins my silly thief <3

witness - FUCK YOU CASSIAN

distant shores - captain edward at first then i chose charlie

the nanny affair - female!latina sam

a very scandalous proposal - black!male simon, he was cute idc

queen b - zoey my princess 🫶

the unexpected heiress - john at first but gemma’s route was too good i love a forbidden romance

my first two loves - noah harris FUCK YOU MASON

ms. match - male!latino jack monroe

rising tides - i blind tapped through the whole book not even kidding so idk who i ended up with

wolf bride - FUCK YOU BASTIEN AND MORGAN

foreign affairs - blaine hayes my poopoo bear 🤭

slow burn - both julia and everett but juliakins my endgame

laws of attraction - GABE MY SEXY AND SMART KING

shipwrecked - boring romance between the captain and mc SNOOZE

wake the dead - all of them but i ended up with eli

surrender - FUCK YOU REAGAN

crimes of passion - TRYSTAN MY FOREVER ANGELBEAR I LOVE YOU

untameable - kit jackson you are a loser

the princess swap - speed tapped through the whole book idc about both lis

the cursed heart - YOU ARE A LITTLE BITCH KIERAN

immortal desires - both cas and gabe but i liked cas a tad bit more

#this took me forever for real #playchoices #pixelberry #choices #choices stories you play #choices tag #choices tag game

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emmyhem · 4 years

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it’s about time (l.r.h)

a/n: hi again! first of all i want to say thank you for the support on “seven things” it means the world. secondly, my requests are open and i’d be happy to write something for you. this is a jealous bff!luke imagine i wanted to get up this weekend, i didn’t do a very thorough edit before posting so hopefully there aren’t any typos. i am working on the request for a lashton x reader love triangle piece right now and will hopefully have it up by monday or tuesday. thank you, i hope you enjoy - emmy :)

pairing: luke hemmings x reader

summary: being best friends with the guy you’re in love with is extremely taxing especially when you have to watch him be with another girl all night. just when you’ve finally had enough of waiting around for him he ruins your plans for moving on.

warnings: alcohol, using alcohol as a coping mechanism, slight angst, jealous luke, mentions of throwing up, cursing, luke’s a bit of an asshole.

word count: 3.3k

“God, could they get a room?” you scoffed leaning into Calum as you watched your best friend practically eat his date’s face from across the club.

“Jealous are we y/n?” Calum laughed slinging an arm over your shoulder.

“No, just utterly disgusted.” you said before slamming back your fourth shot of tequila.

That was a lie, you were jealous. You were so insanely jealous that you could scream.

Luke had met his date, Hannah at the studio last week. She was new, working at the front desk. She had caught Luke’s eye the second she walked in the room with a bright confident smile, and a flirty look in her eye. Luke had asked her out the next day and was practically giddy when she accepted.

And that’s how they ended up in the corner of the club, Luke’s hands tangled in her hair, and her tongue down his throat. All the while you were trying to not look bitter, and distracting yourself with one too many drinks.

It wasn’t a new routine. You couldn’t count how many times you’ve had to sit back and watch a girl way prettier than you, be in the exact position that you would quite literally die to be in, with your best friend of 4 years. And somehow it seemed to hurt more each time, which meant more drinks for you.

As you felt the familiar and comforting burn of your fifth shot of the night slide down your throat Calum shot you a knowing look.

“Maybe you should slow down there, kid.”

You rolled your eyes and took his Corona from his hands using it as a chaser.

“Corona girl?” you heard from behind you. When you turn, your eyes meet a pretty pair of green ones (you still preferred Luke’s blue, but what the hell).

“Tequila girl.” you clarified.

“Respect.” the man said, extending a strong tattooed hand. “I’m Austin.”

“Y/n” you said, shaking his hand. You glanced over your shoulder at Calum who was now engaged in a conversation with Mikey and Ashton beside you.

“Pretty name, pretty girl.” he smirked. “So, can I get you a tequila?”

You giggled, happy for a distraction from Luke.

“You can get me a margarita, on the rocks.”

“Deal.”

The two of you chatted as you sipped on your drink, mind getting hazier with each sip. And you don’t know if it was the alcohol or your determination to get Luke off your mind but Austin was really, really hot.

“Do you wanna dance with me?” you asked before you had a chance to convince yourself otherwise. You were never really a dance in public kind of girl, normally the closest you got to showing your moves on the dancefloor was Just Dance in Luke’s living room.

“Absolutely.” Austin replied, sliding an arm around your waist to lead you to the dancefloor.

The bass beat shook the floor as the two of you made your way to the middle of the club. As you stopped you realized you had absolutely no idea what to do. You never did stuff like this. You can’t even remember the last time you went on a date, let alone danced to sleazy house music with a stunning stranger. You glanced around you hoping to follow the lead of the more experienced dancers around you.

A redhead to your right swung her hips, inching closer to her partner's body with each movement until she was pressed directly to his chest.

“Seems like a good place to start” you mumbled to yourself.

The second your hips were in movement Austin’s hands gripped them strongly guiding your movements closer and closer to him. As the beat built and your movements slowed to a teasingly slow pace his grip tightened causing your tight white dress to bunch up on your thighs.

With the alcohol in your bloodstream and Austin’s breath on the back of your neck you nearly forgot about Luke and your perpetual sadness, that is until you locked eyes with him from across the room.

Hannah was tucked under his arm sipping on her drink, but his gaze was locked on you, he had an unrecognizable look on his face, and a jaw clenched so hard you feared he would break his teeth.

You took him staring as the perfect opportunity to spin around, inches away from Austin’s face looking up at him through your lashes. His pupils were blown a bit, eyes filled with lust. He was practically breathing into your mouth. You will yourself to just kiss him. It’s not like you were Luke’s girl you thought, so you started to lean in.

As Austin placed his hand on the back of your neck you felt someone grab your arm tugging you out of Austin’s grip.

“Y/n” Luke appeared next to you.

“Is there a problem man?” Austin said grabbing one of your hands.

Luke rolled his eyes with a sly grin on his face, “Cal wants to talk to you.” he said to you not breaking eye contact with the pissed off guy in front of you.

“I’m a bit busy.” you said annoyance brewing in you as you ripped your arm out of Luke’s hand. “Can it wait?”

“Nope, said it was important.” he said nonchalantly “Better go find him.”

You internally groaned, “I’ll be right back.” you said leaning in to peck Austin’s cheek.

“Y/n, C’mon!” Luke shouted over the music.

“Fine!” you groaned leaving Luke and Austin behind you as you scanned the bar for Calum.

After searching for a few minutes you saw him in a booth with Ashton, and Michael talking and laughing.

“Calum,” you called. He glanced up at you waving a hand above his hand. You slid into the booth next to him, your patience growing thin.

“What is it?” you said.

“What?” he said, confusion spreading across his face.

“Luke said you needed to talk to me, what’s up?”

Calum’s eyebrows tugged together glancing at the other guys.

“I haven’t talked to Luke since we got here.”

You rolled your eyes and turned to the corner across the room where Luke had Hannah pressed up against the wall.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” you said out loud, rubbing your temple in frustration.

Ashton gave you a sympathetic smile and glanced at Michael who was practically sleeping on Cal’s shoulder.

“Maybe we should head out.” he said motioning to the drunk mess that was the three of you.

“No” Calum whined, dragging out the oh sound. “y/n was about to get some.” he teased poking your side.

“Just take him home, y/n/n.” Michael groaned, not even opening his eyes.

You pondered the idea, you never did stuff like this. But Austin was hot, and Luke was preoccupied. To say the least.

“I could take him home.” you say aloud trying to convince yourself.

“Then do it.” Calum challenged.

“I will.” you stated proudly. “You guys get Luke. Ash, you get the uber, and Austin and I will meet you at the door. “ you gave a quick nod to the boys and went to get Austin.

Austin stood exactly where you left him on the dance floor.

“Thank god you’re back. I-“

Before he had a chance to finish, you crashed your lips onto his. He quickly fell into the kiss moving his hand to the small of you back. Before it went any further you pulled apart about an inch, and spoke into his mouth,

“Come back to my apartment?”

“Absolutely.” he said an excited smile growing on his face.

When the two of you made it to where your group was struggling to stand by the door Luke pulled apart from Hannah, looking Austin up and down. His eyes stopping where your hands were interlocked.

“Love, a word?” he slurred, nodding his head away from the group.

You walked with him just outside the door.

“What’s up?”

“What are you doing?” he asked.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean with this guy, what are you doing with him?”

“Um, taking him home with me?” you said confused.

“You can’t do that.”

“Who says?” anger began building as you looked up at him.

“Uh, me I guess. You know nothing about him.”

This caused you to scoff, a laugh passing your lips, “And you do a background check on every girl you take home with you?”

“That’s different,” he alleged.

“And how’s that?” your patience was growing thin, and you could feel this conversation sobering you up.

“I don’t know y/n, you're just not one night stand material.”

Okay, ouch. Tears began to prick at your waterline.

“Go to hell.” you breathed, pushing past him.

“No, y/n/n. You know that’s not what I meant. C’mon love, hey I’m sorry.” he called after you.

As you approached the group, holding back tears, you took a glance at Austin in front of you and realized that no matter how hot he was you really didn’t even want this. How could you when you were head over heels in love with your asshole of a best friend.

But it was too late now, you would do it. Even if it was wrong. Even if you didn’t want to. Even if it was just to spite Luke.

“Ready to head out?” you questioned aloud, swallowing your hurt.

“Yep, uber just got here.” Ashton confirmed, guiding a hammered Calum and Michael out the door.

You all climbed into the Uber X Ashton had ordered, Luke, Hannah, and Calum in the back, Ashton in the passenger seat, and Michael, Austin, and you in the middle.

As you pulled away from the club, Ashton spoke over the light music coming from the car radio and gave the driver Luke’s address. The group had made plans to all spend the night at Luke’s, like you typically did after a night out.

“We have one more stop actually” you choked out, feeling Austin lean into you, lips attaching to your neck.

You gave the man your address and turned your attention back to the sexually charged man glued to your side. As he moved his kisses up to your jaw you closed your eyes, in order to prevent yourself from breaking down. The constant reminder that Luke had no interest in you, being thrown in your face as Hannah released soft sighs behind you.

Ashton glanced back at you from the front seat,

“You feeling okay, kid?” he asked.

You nodded gulping, and looked up at the ceiling to deter your threatening tears.

His eyes narrowed in concern as he adjusted his body in his seat so he was looking you in the eyes. Luke turned his attention away from Hannah (much to her despair) to the front of the car as Ashton spoke.

“Y/n, you sure? Maybe you and your friend should continue this another night.” Ashton suggested, noticing how you had tensed up and your expression had faltered since entering the car.

Austin pulled off of you and shot him a frustrated glare from his seat. Ashton raised his eyebrows in response, silently challenging Austin to confront him.

Austin moved in centimeters from your ear, “Your friends are kind of cockblocks.” he complained.

You tilted your head away from him and looked out the window Michael was sitting next to.

“Maybe they’re right.” you muttered. “Maybe you should just go home, and we can do this some other time. I’m not feeling well.”

You kept your gaze directed outside of the car, too afraid to see his reaction to your sudden rejection.

“Your kidding right?” he scoffed.

You were becoming more anxious by the second as he rambled on about how you must be joking.

“I’m not laughing.” Luke interrupted flatly.

“Okay, what’s your deal man?” Austin’s demeanor had quickly changed as he turned to face Luke, aggression clear in his face.

Luke held his hands in the air before resting them on the back of your seat. “No deal, she’s just clearly not interested, so maybe you could give her some space.”

Calum and Michael perked up in their seats as the mood in the car shifted. In the front Ashton was talking to the driver, explaining how you would be getting dropped off with the rest of them.

Austin was in a confrontational mood now, one that made you uneasy. He and Luke continued to bicker back and forth. Hannah sat confused and aggravated next to Luke.

You were seconds away from crumbling, feeling extremely upset and overwhelmed. Michael placed a hand on your shoulder, hoping to ease some of your distress as you pulled into Luke’s driveway.

Everyone got out of the car, leaving Austin stirring in his own anger. Ashton patted the top of the car twice before it drove away.

“Well, y/n you sure know how to pick em’” Luke commented.

Calum shot him a disapproving look as you shoved past, running inside.

You had officially reached your breaking point. You couldn’t have Luke but you were in too deep to be with anyone else. Not to mention the fact that Luke seemed to be taking pleasure in your misfortune for the night.

You went straight for the bathroom. All the alcohol and confrontation hadn’t been kind to your stomach.

You hunched over the toilet and began throwing up before you even got the chance to close the door all the way. Your eyes were red and stinging from your tears and your throat was stripped raw. Hugging your knees to your chest you sat with your back against the sink.

Three soft knocks came from the cracked door and you peered up through cloudy eyes to see Ashton looking at you with pity clear on his face.

“Can I come in?”

You nodded into your knees, staring down at the familiar tiles of Luke’s bathroom.

You couldn’t count how many times you had been in this exact spot. Whether it be dealing with the consequences of your unhealthy coping mechanism after a night out like you were now. Early mornings after sleeping over, sitting in the steam while Luke showered because he just couldn’t wait to tell you a story, or late nights he would convince you to paint his nails. All of it was replaying in your head.

“Why can’t he just love me the way I love him?” you whimpered as a sob broke from your throat.

Ashton was quick to wrap his arms around you, taking a seat on the floor.

“It’s okay, y/n.” he shushed. “You’re okay.

“I love him, Ash” your voice muffled from being pressed to his shoulder.

“I know.” he comforted you, rocking your frame lightly. You sat in silence for a bit, trying to control your breathing.

By the time you left the bathroom Calum and Michael were asleep on the couch and Luke and Hannah had gone to Luke’s room. Ashton laid on the couch with the other guys and you made your way to the guest room, falling asleep the second your head hit the pillow.

You woke up early with a throbbing headache and an insatiable craving for iced coffee. There was no doubt in your mind that you were first one awake, the guys wouldn’t be up for hours. You tiptoed through the living room past a sleeping Michael, Calum, and Ashton being careful not to wake them. As you turned the corner to leave you heard a voice from the kitchen,

“Morning,” Luke called, his gravelly voice making it very clear he had just woken up. He was leaning on the cabinet in a pair of sweats, a cup of coffee in hand.

“Oh, you’re up.” you responded still moving towards the door.

“Going somewhere?” he questioned walking towards you.

“Yea I gotta go, I have uh…” your mind was drawing a blank. “ya know, laundry.”

“Wait,” he sprung forward in two big steps grabbing your shoulder. “as urgent as that sounds, I wanna talk.”

“‘bout what?”

“I feel like I should apologize for last night.”

“It’s okay, we can talk about it later. I really gotta get going.”

“Y/n! Will you let me say sorry, please?” he pleaded

“You have.” you replied nodding at him before turning away once again.

“Fine, then can I ask why you tried to take someone home last night. You never do that.”

“No reason.” you lied, opening the front door.

“Really? Cause Cal said something last night about you being jealous or something and then I went to check on you and I overheard-”

“I gotta go.” you panicked, taking a step outside.

Right before the door swung closed and you made your escape Luke stopped it with his hand and spoke,

“Are you in love with me?”

You froze where you stood, squeezing your eyes shut completely mortified.

Slowly, you spun back around to face Luke. He stepped out of the door frame allowing you reentrance and led you to the kitchen. Once you had both sat down he spoke again,

“So is it true? What you told Ashton last night, is it true?”

You placed your hands over your eyes and shook your head.

“Does it matter?” you responded.

“Of course it matters, what do you mean?”

“I mean you have Hannah and it doesn’t matter how I fe-”

“Hannah’s gone.” he interrupted.

“Gone?”

“It wasn’t gonna work out with us. I ended things last night.”

“Why would you end things with-” you paused, eyes narrowing.

Luke looked down, suddenly not wanting to meet your eyes.

“Do you...you love me?”

At this Luke shot up from his seat and started pacing around the kitchen.

“Well, of course I do. But I asked you first, and you can’t just..” he rambled on but you stopped listening after “of course I do”

“Lu,” you said, standing up

He continued talking, not even hearing you over his own nervous talking and fidgeting.

“Lu.” you called a bit louder.

He turned to you, stopping mid sentence his mouth still hanging open.

“I am.”

“You…” he spoke slowly, eyes frozen on you.

“I am in love with you.”

Both of you were frozen in place, terrified that if you moved you may wake up and discover this was all just a dream. You stayed like that for about a minute till you broke the silence.

“I have been, for a couple years now. And I never told you, cause I always thought that-” you were cut off by Luke’s lips.

He had one hand on the back of your neck and the other pulling you closer by the waist. You melted into the kiss pressing a hand to his chest. It may sound cliche but you swore you were seeing fireworks as he ran his tongue along your bottom lip.

“I love you.” he sighed as you pulled apart. “I am so in love with you, fuck I can’t believe-” Before he had a chance to ramble again you pulled him back in for another kiss.

After a few minutes you broke away to catch your breath. Luke moved his hands to cup both your cheeks,

“Hi.” he cooed.

“Hi” you smiled. “I need coffee” you turned away walking towards the kitchen.

“Hey no wait” he whined pulling you back by the waist. “m’not done kissing you.”

“We have plenty of time for that, but I need coffee now.” you teased pressing a swift kiss to his lips.

“Mmm, I know but we’ve got a lot of catching up to do” he said chasing behind you and wrapping his arms around your waist as you walked to the coffee machine.

As you fixed yourself a coffee, Luke's chin resting on the top of your head, you heard shuffling from the living room. When you looked up Michael was walking in with messy hair and eyes puffy from sleep. He glanced at you in Luke’s arms, his expression unchanging and mumbled while pulling orange juice from the fridge,

“It’s about time.”

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gh0stwriting · 4 years

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Hcs for bby boi Thomas, Michael, Jason, and wall child proposing to their s/o, but instead of an actual ring, For Brahms he uses a funyun like the man child he is please?

(wall child has me fucking rolling omg 😂 also yall really be knowing my type at this point and ill gladly write for these boys no matter how many asks i get for them)

THOMAS HEWITT

he tried to propose to you once with a severed finger that had a huge ring on it, but we don't talk about that. (Hoyt sold it when he found it)

the second time he tried to propose he kind of just handed you a metal washer with no explanation. you asked him what it was for and he showed you the matching one, a silver washer bent all kinds of ways to fit his finger and you realized what he was trying to say.

at first you were hesitant, you weren't sure if he was mentally developed enough to understand marriage. but nonetheless you slipped the washer onto your finger and he made a sort of giggling snort sound before carrying you into the house to show off his new fiancé.

Hoyt was pissed to say the least. He kept going on about how “the saw is family boy. you ain't leavin’ it behind.” and Thomas’ mood went from over the moon to looking like a kicked puppy in seconds.

you stood up to Hoyt for maybe the first time ever, telling him that if this is what Thomas really wanted, that he couldn't physically stop him, family or not. that seemed to strike a nerve though and Hoyt looked close to snapping at you. Thomas stepped between you though, recieving a blow to the shoulder which was surely meant for your face. Thomas was fine, but Hoyt sure as hell wasn't.

MICHAEL MYERS

(this is lowkey OOC but i feel like he might do this if he fully trusts and loves the person)

he's not wearing a wedding ring, no way. it’d probably fall off and he’d lose it and he just doesn't really see the point. marriage is really just a few thousand dollars and some papers anyways.

though he does want to show the extent of his love for you, and the fact that he wants to spend as long as he's able with you, so he leaves for quite a while. at first you're worried something happened, but then realized it's just Michael, he does this a lot, it's how he copes with emotions.

When he does come back however, he has many things with him, the most noticeable being a bouquet of flowers that he probably took off of a grave. then he pulls out a cheap looking BFF necklace, no doubt stolen as well and drops it into your hands.

the last thing he does takes you by surprise as its a day you never thought you'd live to see, he shows his devotion to you by reluctantly removing his mask, you being the only person besides Laurie to see his face as it is now; shaggy brown hair hanging over parts of his face, his blinded eye a milky blue color, the other cold but somehow vibrant. a litany of scars crossing over each other covering large parts of his neck and chest.

if this doesn't prove his love, nothing will. but somehow he mistook your look of shock and awe as fear and disgust and quickly started to replace his mask, your hand grabbing his wrist, stopping him. “michael, i-thank you for trusting me. if this is a proposal, the answer has always been yes.” you say with tears welling up in your eyes. you hug him and the second you let go, he rushes off to sulk somewhere, you overloaded his brain with emotions.

JASON VOORHEES

in his eyes, marriage is bad. His parents were married but got divorced when he was born and has hated the concept ever since. you came into his life and he found himself warming up to the subject but still wasn't completely comfortable with it.

but you trusted him with your life and he trusted you with his, and he wanted to make sure you never forget that. He wasn't aware of what normal proposal etiquette was but decided that whatever he did would be worth something.

he woke you up in the middle of the night to him dropping a few things on the bed and then tapping you to get your attention. You roll over and notice the weirdest object first, which seems to be some sort of skull. Maybe a coyote? It looked thoroughly cleaned at least. The only other item was his jacket, blood stains, cuts and all.

You confirmed with him that these things were for you before putting on his jacket. You went to examine the skull after, flipping it over to notice a carving in the underside of the jawbone, unsure if its a heart or an infinity symbol you look up at him, to which he points to your chest, signifying that it is, indeed, a heart.

See, he never proposed per se, but the commitment is there. Him giving you his jacket was a huge act of trust as he's worn it for years, and unlike Michael he’d never take off his mask if he even could.

BRAHMS HEELSHIRE

It was the day after a grocery delivery and you two were still sorting through the assortment of meals and snacks in the many boxes. As you two were putting away the last of the food he found something he’d never tried before, but he quickly put the package inside his shirt, much like a child would so you didn’t find out. Not like you could hear the crinkling of the bag over the music you had playing.

You turned around to ask him what he wanted for dinner when you saw the object poking out of the bottom of his shirt, raising your eyebrows in a silent question. To which he held the hem of his shirt and started to walk out of the room.

You repeatedly called his name and tried to get him to put the thing away, but he refused. You tried to grab his arm to stop him, but again he refused and ran to one of the openings in the walls, effectively stopping your pursuit as you didn't fully understand the paths yet.

With a roll of your eyes and a huff you went back to the kitchen to start preparing dinner, not expecting to see him again until he was either sick from whatever he managed to sneak or until you forced him to leave the walls for dinner.

But right as you were about to plate the food and call for your man-child of a boyfriend you heard his childlike voice call your name, making you jump and drop the hot food all over the floor. You turned around, prepared to scold him when you saw him on one knee with a funyun in his hand. “(y/n). Marry me?” was his simple request, using his regular voice so you knew he was serious. Of course you said yes, and scolded him later.

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lovecolibri · 4 years

Note

I would nothing more for someone putting M*ria in her place and she recognising that she was awful and apologising but I honestly think that they are going to ignore that and just keep going which means that I will forever hate her lol I've already decided that I'm not going to watch any of her scenes because I seriously cannot stand to even watch her even less if they continue having her being "bff" with Alex and probably now with Michael as well

I don't know what is going to happen with season 3 since Chris has SUCH a mess to clean up as well as trying to move forward, so I'm sure some things will get a throwaway line of 'resolution', dropped, or swept under the rug never to be mentioned again. It's inevitable. I'm sure we will never get the narrative satisfaction of having m*ria's behavior addressed though I'm crossing my fingers to see some visual representation in Alex and Michael not sharing scenes with her even if it's not expressly talked about WHY they aren't. We been knew. I am really hoping after the backlash from not just fandom but from a lot of news articles and interviews and stuff after season 2 about the wasted potential of the Vlamburn chemistry and the tired "love triangle" storyline (that NEVER works in a soulmate story like RNM), that Chris (a romantic as we've been told) takes that to heart. My big fear is that in trying to erase the damage from last season they will overcompensate and have m*ria all up in Malex's business and I absolutely think that would be the wrong call. We'll just have to wait and see, Nonnie! And hopefully m*ria can have her own storyline far, FAR away from both Michael and Alex. The speculation is killing me because it reminds me of how nervous I am that they will double down on these "friendships" and I literally cannot stomach that. BUT I am trying to remain hopeful and optimistic! Jeanine, Vlamis, and Tyler all seem very excited for the Malex storyline and the show in general this season so I'm holding on to that excitement!

#roswell nm #anti maria deluca #please chris #just let those 'friendships' die #alex and max have had like zero present day interactions #so it's not like it's hard to not have characters interact #uuuuugh i am just waiting for kyle to get stuck with her too after getting stuck with steph who was mean to him all the time #my sweet son kyle deserves better #he deserves to be loved for the good kind man that he is and not as some kind of hot accessory #my sweet nonnie friends #you can always come be bitter in my inbox #i enjoy high sodium levels

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simping-on-the-daily · 3 years

Text

I have to yet to fully develop them but boom boom bitches did you think I would stop making Dream SMP OCs? Hell nah

They both be a combination of Tales of the Dream SMP characters and actual Dream SMP characters

They're all canon and they will eventually have their own bios, but this is just a place to hold my notes basically

Toastie

Slime hybrid

They/she

Full name is Toastie Rickroll (based off the last names generally being memes)

I listened to Hamilton while making her so that helps

Fought for L'Manburg during the Independence Arc

Eventually joined Schlatt's cabinet for Manburg, but later resigned and helped join Pogtopia

Also became part of the Butcher Army

Currently apart of no faction

Respects tradition very well

Their family has fought and died for their respective countries for years

And Toastie carried on the tradition

Without something or someone to fight for Toastie kinda feels useless

They're so used to fighting that peace is basically a foreign concept to her

It doesn't help with all the wars

Toastie does what they do best: protect

And with L'Manburg gone, they now have someone (or a few someone's to care for)

Very fond of their old cabinet and her Butcher Army friends

Despises Techno and Dream for destroying L'Manburg on numerous occasions

Phil is very close to also getting on their negative list

Their most precious item is their enchanted Netherite axe, the Mindbreaker

Toastie confirms it's a family heirloom you get when you learn how to hold scissors correctly

It basically has the blood of people who fought against the country Toastie's family decided to fight for and were either killed or tortured with it

Toastie wants to try and guide it and herself on a more peaceful path, but they always end up going to violence

It's kinda engraved in her

Since she trusts Quackity due to experience, they give him their axe daily as long as he brings it back

They're unaware that Quackity's using it to torture Dream

Very protective and dedicated to fighting for those they care about

Tends to learn towards fighting as her first option and runs her mouth a lot

ThEy'Re BoUncY-

They can jump really high

Really likes swamps

If they ever get injured, the injured part can turn into miniature versions of themselves similar to tiny slimes and they'll attack their opponent

Absolutely despies Magma Cubes and will attack them whenever she can get the chance

Whisp

Wolf hybrid

But they're also a ghost!

Their real name is Whisper, and their full name is Quiet Whispers

She/Her

Large grey ears on their head

Long tail that can fade sometimes due to ya know, death

Really fun to chew on bones despite the fact that she doesn't need to eat them and she can't even digest them

She can bond with other people and she can track the people she's bonded with

Can bite really hard, has enhanced speed and strength, and they also have a pretty pogchamp smell and eyesight

Despite the fact that's she pretty powerful, Whisp is a strict pacifist who only hung around L'Manburg due to having numerous friends there

Somehow the only ghost to have a decent fucking memory of her life

Remembers good and bad, though she sometimes wishes she doesn't

Red sweaters boiiisssss

Very forgiving and kind

But a really giant people pleaser and self-sacrificial

Her self worth is based on what people think of her

Tries her best to get on everyone's good side

It breaks her if someone dislikes her

Grew up in a really shitty household where Whisp was basically ignored

So she grew up trying to gain the affection that her family never gave her

Really fucking touch-starved

Just pretty bad self esteem, even when she's dead

Please just tell her that she means something outside of other people's opinions and that she's an amazing human being

Absolutely adores animals!

Has numerous pet cafes

Like, so many gosh dang cafes

There's one for cats, one for dogs, and then there's a giant miscellaneous one

They're all part of the same building and that's also another part of it which is basically her house

BFFs with Ghostbur

Please protect her and tell her that she's amazing she really needs it

Sunny

Full name is Sunny Wholesun

Last name is a pun off 'wholesome' and 'sun'

Very proud of it

She's an angel boissss

She/her

Very simliar to Bad in terms of personality

They're both very sweet and will help anyone

Isn't a part of any countries

She just pops in when she wants to,,,,,

Conflict freaks her out

Optimsitc pal that just chooses to look on the bright side of things,,,,

However-

She wants to desperately try and be her own person outside of 'Bad but angelic' but she keeps getting compared to him

She feels like she keeps being in people's shadows despite being a literal creature of purity and light

Feels like a side character honestly

Good friends with Phil, but disapproves of his title, most notably due to it having death in it

Said to know Dream XD and the other gods of the server

Absolutely understand very dirty stuff, but chooses to ignore it

Also can understand war and sadness

Sunny just kinds chooses to keep holding her head up high

In her own words "If you always keep thinking of sad things, you'll always be sad"

And now the TOTDS ones

Lady Venus

From the Masquerade timeline

Ghast hybrid royalty

Berothed to Sir Billiam the III since birth

Very much married and in love

She's pretty kind for a royal

Or at the very least more nicer

Treats her servants well and gives them pay as well as vacation days

However, she lacks empathy and is somewhat insensitive

Doesn't understand that some people don't have the same social privilege's as her

So she can piss some people off

Her main butler was Ryan and he was basically her best friend outside of Billiam and Ranbutler

However, Ryan got angry and ended up assassinating her

Spear in the chest

Felt incredibly betrayed since Ryan was one of her few friends and died feeling fear and shock

Billiam ended up executing Ryan

With the death of his lover, Billiam aligned with the Egg due it promising to bring Venus back if he swore alliance to it

She remains a ghost, but neither Ranbutler, Billiam or anyone else can't see her

Venus absolutely despises the Egg for corrupting her family, but at the same time, truly believes it can bring her back to life, so she needs it

Her spear ridden body is in the same room as the Egg, therefore corrupting her body, and therefore her ghost, which is connected to it

Whenever Billiam or Ranbutler go down there, it ended up motivating the two further in order to bring Venus back

She clings to the hope that when the Egg brings her back to life, she can reunite with her husband and adoptive son once more and forget the Egg

She know it won't happen but hope is kinda the only thing she has

At the Masquerade, she was only able to be seen and talk to Karl due to him being from another time

Truly felt bad about his death, but didn't stop it since she wanted to live again

Without her being able to produce a heir, the Ghast royal family basically went in shambles and they all eventually died, making the Ghasts a free place with no government or hierarchy

I really love Venus as she's a very fun character to do and also very sad

Supports Ranbutler rights

Meanings

From the Village That Went Mad

Morals' ancestor

My friend compared her to that Chris girl from Carrie and I love it

She's a complete and utter asshole

Like, a full on fucking dick

Horrible person to be around

She's a villager, but absolutely everyone wanted her dead due to being a full on bitch

Jimmy theorizes that this is because of her mother also being the Enderdragon and either feeling like she's on top of everyone because of it, or that she feels inferior because Meanings isn't her mum so she acts like a dick to cover it up

It's either one of those two options

Just a full on fucking dick

I also love playing her because she's a really fun character

Horrible person, yes

But absolutely hilarious to play as

Maggie/Michael

From the Lost City of Mizu

I don't consider Mizu to be the official future, but rather an alternate reality, so bear with me in mind for that

I feel really smart with her name

It means Pearl, and you know

Mizu being an underwater city and all that?

Michael means 'who is like God', which refers to her best friend's......love for a past figure

They're genderfluid! Mostly goes by she/her, though on some days, they go with he/him

Her relationship with Ranbob is very similar to the one between Morals' and Dream

Since I don't see the story as a possible canon future but instead another alternate reality, she's not a descendant of anyone

And you know what? You wanna know what?

She's a cow hybrid now

Why? Because I said so

Remove Ranbob's very yandere personality and their friendship is friendship goals

Heck, even with it, it's still friendship goals

I will defo have more but those are the only Tales of the Dream SMP episodes I've watched, so-

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wenightmareyou · 3 years

Text

movie post for AR @alien-romantic !! ✨

okay i feel like my movie taste really does come down to what did i see in theaters that made me define my personality around them for the rest of the week, and i usually have Allergic to Watching Old Movies Disease so most of these are p recent! my movie taste is Also defined by what i saw enough on tumblr that eventually i broke down and watched it and it was actually amazing lol

✨favorite horror movies✨

Jennifer’s Body: THEE movie of all time, it literally has anything i could ever want in a movie: excessively campy dialogue, a plot around making a deal with the devil, a town that’s slightly fucked up, extended metaphors about gender violence but in a palatable PG-13 non-graphic format, Megan Fox going feral and eating boys, a homoerotic friendship where they also kinda hate each other but its mostly bc neither of them can deal with their feelings in the world they were brought up in, and a soundtrack that slaps. Seriously i could probably quote this movie word for word at this point, and like technically its horror but its also really funny and theres not really any jumpscares or anything. Im gonna stop talking about this one bc if i keep going i could write a whole essay but its so good (also i wont elaborate but Jennifers Body and Heathers are sisters, spiritually)

Us: hhhhhhhh this is so good, ik Jordan Peele’s only directed two movies so far but he never misses, like this was genuinely terrifying for me but also raises a lot of Questions and made me think about the implications of it for weeks afterward. It’s about this family vacationing in Santa Cruz, CA at the same time that there’s this planned uprising of doppelgängers all around the US (i cant remember if its the world or just the US? But it makes a lot of commentary about the US in particular so im guessing its just the US). I’ve still only seen it once but the aesthetics are so good, its definitely more on the violent side than Get Out was, but its not too bad (like idk if you’ve seen Midsommar but like. its nowhere near as gory as that lol). I swear i didnt have a fear of doppelgängers before this but between this and tma i sure do now

It (chapter 1): this one is so close to my heart omg 🥺 i associate it super strongly with watching it with friends so thats at least half the reason its a favorite. Also i love horror-comedies so much as a genre, mostly bc i scare easily so its nice to have jokes in between to break the tension and this movie’s hilarious

Cabin in the Woods: i cant say what this one’s about without spoiling it but i’ll say it definitely goes under the same category as It for me, in terms of horror-comedy. Its such a fun deconstruction of horror movie tropes and it gets so insane at the end, like when you watch it you can *tell* it was made in 2011 but like in a good way

Also honorable mention to The Love Witch for sending me into a spiral about what truly is the female gaze/if there can be one definition of that/the relationship between love and violence etc etc basically it’s Extremely Gender. Also not v bloody and doesnt have any jumpscares, and its an aesthetic masterpiece omg

✨favorite comfort movies/romcoms✨

Juno: i dont normally have favorite actors but Elliot Page is my emotional support favorite actor, like idk how to explain it but all of his characters just scream comfort character somehow. Juno has the same screenwriter as Jennifer’s Body so it has a really similar sense of humor, but altogether v wholesome plot about a pregnant teenager and her bff, michael cera. Also highly quotable, and i dont think ive ever watched this without crying, like this is one of those movies where im like love is real actually 🥺💕

Easy A: this movieee!!! Oh my god this movie, its so intensely californian and thats def part of why i like it. Also realizing now a major factor in movies i like is how quotable they are bc this is another one i feel like i quote all the time. Plus theres something so fun about baby Emma Stone living her 80s movie protagonist dream AND doing the “you think i’m a villain? I’ll show you a villain!” trope bc thats always fun

All of twilight but especially the first one: i mean idk what to say, i got brainworms when i was 11 and made twilight my whole personality for like 3 years, then grew out of it, then the twilight renaissance happened and im Back on My Bullshit 😂 i also just like having a purpose for me memorizing everything possible about twilight in middle school so like.... if you ever want any fun twilight facts hit me up (this goes to AR but if you’re not AR and reading this too this also applies lmao im down to talk about twilight any time)

And honorable mention to Scott Pilgrim (okay not a romcom but def a comfort movie), to be fair i havent seen this one all the way through in a looong time but i go back to the most iconic parts a lot

also okay theres def more in this category that i like but my brain is turned off now so i cant remember them 😂

✨ and the best category: movies i hate ❤️ ✨

i feel like i tend not to like movies that feel like they’re trying too hard? Like if i watch something and *instantly* know its trying to be Oscar bait, or if its trying to be camp but like,,., pretentious high end camp. Like anything by Wes Anderson is a hard nope for me, also i saw Gravity in theatres on a whim whenever that came out and it just didnt click for me at all. (Also okay The Love Witch kiiiind of checks the boxes for this but its still a fave)

Also okay this movie isnt any of those things but i still dont like it: It Chapter 2! I feel so bad cause It chapter 1 was so good and created this huge hype for the sequel for me, but the plot just went off the fucking rails. Sure we got bill hader being in love with his childhood best friend which spawned the whole Reddie craze on here for awhile..... but that came at the price of naked old ladies being used for shock value and whatever the hell was going on with Pennywise being an alien/god/something??? Like if the book is like this i know i couldn’t get through it, i was laughing my way through the whole movie but like, laughing (derogatory)

I feel like this section just became a reason to dunk on It Ch 2 but honestly the only other sequel i can think of that betrayed me like that was Endgame 😂

Also unrelated but while im still on the topic of movies i dont like/my hot takes: 10 Things I Hate About You was too sexist for me enjoy, i see it hyped on here a lot and im like ??? yall that did not age well 😭 but tbf i still like Mean Girls so we all have our things 😂

#this is for AR but if anyone wants out of context movie opinions here they are lol #also omgg i typed this on my notes app and did not realize how long it got lmao #my post #also wait i forgot heathers under comfort movies but pretend thats there too

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vagrantblvrd · 4 years

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so i started watching The Old Guard because of your posts and mashes so well with the Immortal!FAHC so i was wondering, what are your thoughts on that, like who is the oldest, which era is each member of the crew from, how did they die the first time, and so on :3

Yesssss. >:D

But, no I hope you liked it, friend!

The first time I watched I was thinking that too!

As to Immortal!FAHC I have many thoughts on it from before watching this movie.

I’m also no good at history, and get my eras mixed up? (Like oh my God I had that intense focus thing going on as a kid for a while for WWII warplanes after watching Memphis Belle with my dad, but aside from that, yeah???)

(All of this is to say please excuse inaccuracies as most of what I know is from media and Wikipedia. Also, some of these are more well thought out than others, so pls to keep that in mind.)

Presented in no particular order:

My favorite take on it though has Gavin as the oldest, right? (Pretends he isn’t, but the others find out over time because he stops trying to hide it when he realizes it’s not an issue with them the way it’s been with other immortals he’s run across for whatever reason.)

Born during the Bronze Age and the person he was back then was just awful, horrible little asshole without redeeming qualities to speak of whatsoever.

Came from a wealthy/important family which is something that’s people can still tell to this day even if he’s not a bastard about it anymore.

He died alone and unloved (no reason to love the person he was back then, something he freely admits to anyone asking who wants the real answer) to thieves/bandits or some wasting illness, idk.

From there he learns how not to be a complete piece of shit and honestly, it takes him a long goddamned time.

Lifetimes, really. (Not his, of course, but as time goes and all that.)

Watching and learning from the people around him from the poor farmers and so on who take pity on this dirty traveler on the verge of starving to death to emperors and kings and queens and other puffed up royalty and such.

Favored Italy and England enough that he’s woven both into the Golden Boy’s persona with the accent and references to this grandfather of his that he makes to people who don’t know he’s an immortal.

(Definitely has ties to the mafia, if not served as the head of the Italian mafia for a time, making a comeback as a long-lost/bastard descendant recently discovered with a remarkable likeness to a former mafia head who’s since moved to Los Santos, because of course he did.)

To be fair, he’s still learning with the Fakes, found family and all, and he’s the happiest he can remember being? (Because sappy feels and the whatnot.)

Jack I picture as a viking, because the beard and uh, not much else reason for that line of thinking.

Just this great warrior/peacemaker among his people who dies in battle. (Possibly betrayed because jealous fellow viking at how well-liked and respected Jack is and so on.)

He’s “mellowed” over time, likes to play friendly and affable and so on, will let himself be insulted if it serves the crew’s interests and such? But oh, wow, watch out when he’s angry? (Especially if it’s due to someone hurting someone he cares about.)

Ryan I see as medieval times with the whole kings and queens and knights. (Possibly due to the influence of Kings AU???)

Noble born and served as a knight before being killed in battle or spot of ~intrigue by a political rival/enemy.

Totally got his revenge before realizing the kind of trouble he’d be in if he tried to reclaim his life - unnatural and all - and ended up living a nomadic lifestyle after that. (A vagabond, if you will, because that never not stops being funny to me.)

He gets tangled up with thieves and the like for a while, did some murder for hire that’s been his main career path ever since.

(And okay, if one of the thieves he worked with for a while was this skinny bastard with a big nose and the most ridiculous questions that’s possibly a thing that happened, because reasons. And Freewood.)

Michael I see coming in around the Revolutionary War?

Family moved to the colonies when he was a kid and so on. Signing on to fight against the British and dying in a battle against them, still remembers what it felt like bleeding out in the mud. Has nightmares about it sometimes.

There used to be this whole Thing about it when he met Gavin whenever he leans hard on the British bit that gets even more involved after Jeremy joins the crew.

(Also, also. If Michael and Jeremy collude together against that British asshole, well. That’s a thing that happens. Along with smooches, because none of your goddamned business about that, okay?)

Jeremy comes in during the whole cowboy era, because of the Rimmy Tim getup and I think it’s hilarious as hell.

Originally from Boston (hence the dumb running joke with Gavin and Michael)and moved to the ~wild west as a kid because Adventure and then shenanigans?

Died in a train heist gone horribly wrong and just. He doesn’t like to talk about it, but since he mentioned once it has something to do with his fear of heights, just.

Yikes, you know?

Also, also, the whole bit about cars becoming a thing just before he died (I’m trying not to make a joke about it being of dysentery on a certain trail, but it’s so hard), which is part of why he’s got a Thing about cars now.

(Vroom-vroom fast and that armada of his.)

Trevor, okay, Trevor.

Based pretty much on what his GTA V character used to wear and Trevor himself makes me think of Prohibition-era gangster along with Alfredo?

He and Alfredo started out as street kids in Chicago and the fastest/easiest way to make money for kids like them involved the mob and it was just.

A thing that happened? The two of them coming up in the ranks and BFFs (possibly something more, who can say???) before getting gunned down by rivals one day.

Would have woken up together if the morgue hadn’t fucked up so they went a few years thinking the other had died before accidentally running into one another again, because reasons.

They’ve been together ever since, a pain in Geoff’s ass before he managed to get them to sign on with the crew.

(Trevor kept the fashion sense he had from back then, because of course he did. Doesn’t always dress like he used to, but sometimes he gets the urge and Alfredo laughs at him for it, but he never says a word against it because Trevor looks good like that, you know?)

Speaking of Geoff?

Born around the time Trevor and Fredo were running from Elliott Ness and his Untouchables.

Lied about his age to join the Army and served overseas in the European theater in WWII. Infantry, saw his share of battles that took the shine out of things (what there was to the stupid he kid he was) really damn fast.

Actually survived through the end of the war and made his way back to the US, did some odd jobs here and there for a while as he tried to figure things out.

Listened to the wrong friend (or right one?) and ended up working for some criminal-types, got dragged into the life before he knew it.

Managed to stay alive, learning the ins and outs of being a criminal and all that up until his luck ran out and he ran afoul of some corrupt cops.

Woke up in a ditch somewhere coughing up bullets and freaked out as hell - anyone would be - and then, uh.

Kind of kept going?

Figured shit out as he went, and ran into Jack sometime in the fifties, sixties? Whenever and it was them for the longest damn time before Geoff got the idea to set up in Los Santos for a bit, see how that worked out for them.

(Regret. So much regret because look at all the assholes fucking up his life after that, you know? Really, Jack, stop laughing at him because you’re part of the problem, jackass.)

Lindsay I see as being either relatively young - died in the 80s, 90s? - or as old as if not older than Gavin, depending on the day? (My day??? Idk, I love both a hell of a lot.)

Died in a bank robbery when the asshole responsible for setting the charges to get into the vault miscalculated how much explosives were needed and it was just.

Messy.

Super, super messy.

Fiona is absolutely the youngest, someone Gavin ran into in Europe when he pulled the thing about being his own descendant.

Met her in Paris on his way to the US when she got so goddamned angry at him for accusing her of picking his pocket (a thing she totally did, btw), but she cased such a scene she managed to escape before the cops or Gavin could do anything about it.

She dies in Liberty City working for some assholes who never deserved her, and Gavin happens to be there when she makes the mistake of picking pockets to get enough money to get the hell out of the city before anyone realizes she’s not as dead as she could be?

Terrible disguise of baseball hat, big sunglasses and a scarf over her face, but her response at being caught out as a thief is too similar for Gavin not to realize it’s her.

And then, you know.

He mentions this crew out in Los Santos that would be interested in someone like her? Not as a pickpocket because she’s clearly awful at it - “Hey!” - but they’ve chatted a bit and she mentioned something about sniping - or maybe just perked up when he brought it up.

(Visiting a sniper he used to work with and so on.)

Anyway, why not look them up if she’s ever in Los Santos?

And then she does, of course, and then shenanigans???

Also, also, some of them definitely crossed paths over the years. Ran into one another and are all, “Oh, this asshole again,” maybe work together for a while before going their own ways

They all have this story about meeting Gavin for the first time that no one, no one puts together for the longest damn time.

Like.

How the hell could Jack have met Gavin back when he was being a viking when Gavin claims he died in the 60s?

(Claimed to know the Beatles personally, because of course he did.)

Ryan and that thief he met that one time, got all these FEELS for him that had them being partners in crime for a long, long time before circumstanced forced them apart.

...And then met him again a century or so later and on opposite sides before Gavin did a heroic “sacrifice” to save him at the expense of his current cover. Like, they totally picked up where they left off afterward, because not that stupid? But they got maybe fifteen, twenty years after that together before they were forced apart by circumstances again.

Pattern repeats for a long goddamned time before they happen to meet up again around the time Geoff and Jack get to Los Santos and so far their luck seems to be holding steady. (I just. Man, I love the idea of them being the kind of assholes who are stupid in love with one another but the universe at large is like, lol and tosses a wrench into the works every once in a while for the hell of it and them eventually finding one another again. Because DELICIOUS ANGST.)

Or Michael when he was marching to the next battle and some asshole asking him the stupidest question imaginable next to him? (British accent, sure, but he wasn’t the only one on their side with one, so yes.)

Jeremy and that one Pinkerton agent that one time???

Lindsay and that asshole working for a rival gang who didn’t kill her even though he could have? (When she asks sometime after joining the Fakes he’s just ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ even though he didn’t like the asshole he was working for at the time and actually engineered the bastard’s death, but yeah, sure, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ .

Fiona, well.

Everyone knows that story because she’s like “YOU MOTHERFUCKER,” when she sees him at the penthouse the first time he strolls through the door after she joins the crew.

And just.

Yes.

They put the pieces together at some point and are like son of a bitch because they figured Gavin’s story about being a beatnik or whatever he said he was when he died was the truth?

And Gavin’s like, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ because technically it wasn’t a lie.

He was a beatnik when he died in the 60s, it’s just that that wasn’t the first time he died.

Eventually he tells them about it in bits and pieces, because they don’t push, demand an explanation. (God knows they’ve all got their secrets and reasons for them and such.)

He tells them because he trusts them and they prove he’s right to by not betraying his trust in them and I’m just, like. Full of FEELS right now, so yes.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

ALSO.

Bonus?

But I seriously love the idea of Meg being the inspiration behind the Morrigan.

Just.

Yes.

And if she happens to meet Ryan and Gavin while those two idiots are thieving their way across Europe sometime? That’s definitely a thing that happened.

Also, also, you know she checks up on them in Los Santos from time to time, because old friends (possibly more?) and gets along with Lindsay and Fiona like a house on fire.

Sometimes literally, the three of them >:DDDDDDDD while Geoff’s back at the penthouse shut up in his room because no, no, do not tell him how much of his city’s on fire, Trevor, no.

Idk whether I like former Roman soldier Dan or medieval knight Dan, but whichever one it is he and Gavin go way, way back and they delight in shenanigating about almost as much as Meg and her terrors do in that Geoff is very much :(((((((((((((((((((((((((( when they get together because some part of the city is guaranteed to be on fire at any given point.

#ragehappy #freewood #jackeoff #alfreyco #jeremichael #immortal!FAHC au #technically not a fic #vagrant fic #¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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pastelbatfandoms · 3 years

Text

Survey because I’m bored

Why did you first kiss the last person you kissed? Well it was our first date,and our first offical meeting. We were walking through the park when he kissed me,I'm assuming because he wanted too lol. Not that I was complaining. I was too shy back then to make the first move,nothing like how I am now.

Do you care what people think? A little. Everyone does.

Are you listening to music? If so, what is it? Nope.

Do you like to take walks? Sometimes

Would you ever date someone out of state? Yes

Plans for tonight? Eating Pizza and chilling at home.

Do you want to go to a party? Not during a pandemic.I'm not really into parties anyway.

Has your birthday past this year? No, it’s on the 27th

Has anyone seen you kiss the last person you kissed? Yeah.

Will this year be better then last? Hopefully. For us it has been since we've moved.

Can you listen to music while reading a book? I read out loud so no.

Are Monday mornings the hardest mornings to wake up to? Every morning except when I don't have to walk My son to school are hard lol

Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? maybe.

Last thing you ate? Chicken and Broccoli rice bowl from Panera Bread.

Who was the last person’s voice you heard? Micheal's.

Who do you get along with best in your family? My twin nieces

How old do you think you’ll be when you get married? I was 23 or 24 idr.

Have you ever been kissed in a car? Yes.

Who were you last on the phone with? The Dentist

Do you think anyone has feelings for you? Yes.

Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 months from now? Yes.

Can you commit to one person and one person only? Yup. Though it's a challenge sometimes since mentally I want to be in a Poly relationship but I've never been in one.

Is there someone who continuously lets you down? Not anymore.

Is there anyone in your life that knows right away something’s wrong with you? Yes.

Do you miss your past? Some of it.

Are you typically a happy person? Yeah, in general.

Do you miss the way things used to be between you and someone else? Some parts but the majority no.

Who last made you smile? My Son.

Can you recall the last time you sincerely liked someone a lot a lot? Right now.

Is there a difference between love and being in love? Yeah.

Where is your Mother? At her house.

Have you ever laid on a couch with the opposite sex? Yes.

Would you rather look at clouds or stars? Both seem nice.

If you could change one thing this year about your life, would you? Uh, yeah. The fucking pandemic would be over. <<<This

Did you sleep alone last night? Nope.

Does it matter to you if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? A bit like if they're a full grown alcholic then yes.

Do you like potato chips? Yeah.

Are you ticklish? Yes.

Craziest place you have slept? A Garage

Have you ever been cheated on? I think so. Though I don't have proof.

Can you count on anyone to be there for you, always? Yeah.

Do you think being “heart broken” is as bad as people say? It is. Romantically or not.

I’m guessing you’ve probably been asked this before, but which do you prefer - Coca Cola, or Pepsi? Both

Do you think the last person you texted is a virgin? (You don’t have to tell us who the person is, just say yes or no.) He’s not.

Has your phone ever gone off in the middle of a class at school? I didn't have a phone back then.

In your phone’s contacts, who is the second person listed under the letter ‘R’? I don't have My phone on me. Nor do I know anyone who's name starts with an R,except an Ex but there's no way his number would be in my phone.

What is that person’s favourite drink? No idea.

Has the last person you texted, ever been in your bedroom? We share a bedroom.

The last time you washed your hair, did you use conditioner? I use in spray/leave in conditioner.

Do you prefer light or dark jeans? Either.

Do you have an item of clothing that reminds you of someone? Tell me about it, and the person it reminds you of. I have a few pieces My Mom gave me,that I just keep for nostalgia reasons.

If the last girl you texted told you that she was pregnant, how would you respond? Um that would be My Mom and I would say it was a joke for one she's single and has not interest in dating anyone,2 she's in her 70's and 3 she has her tubes tied.

How old is the last male you texted? 34..

How would you react if your mother told you that she was pregnant again? LMAO already answered this.

Who do you have the most text messages from? My Mom and Michael.

When was the last time you visited the doctor? Last week,I have to go back tomorrow for another blood pressure test.

Do you know anyone who deserves to be slapped? Why? Yes several someones.

When you listen to music, do you generally sing along, or just listen? Definitely depends.

Do you have any of your exes as friends on Facebook? I think Benton who I dated for 8 months and My first BF Scott but I never talk to them.

Would you have sex with the last person that poked you on Facebook? That’s not a thing anymore and hasn’t been for a long time.

Does more than one person like you? Not that I am aware of.

Who is the youngest person in your household? When is that person’s birthday? My youngest Son. Who's Birthday is March 8.

Who was your first love? Do you ever miss that person? Scott Pattern and no not like that. He wasn't a bad BF though.

Do you like your middle name? I do.

Would you ever visit a psychic? lol don't need to. Only one I think I'd trust in would be Sloan Bella,but she's more of a Medium. She can't read your mind or anything,she mainly communes with spirits and reads peoples energies.

You log into Facebook and see the red ‘1’ notification next to the message icon. Who do you want it to be? No one in particular. It's usually a Facebook group or My niece Carol maybe My Mom or BFF.

Let’s say I was going to make you something to eat, what would you like? :) I’m not super hungry and I'm pretty picky. I'd say a grilled hot dog with sauerkraut since you can't really mess that up.

And what drink would you like with that? Pepsi

Do you know anyone with the same first name as you? Tell me about him/her.I used to in middle school. We kinda looked alike as well,I remember her being sweet but we didn't really talk much.

If your hair is long, would you ever think about having it cut short? Or, if it’s short, would you like to grow it long? I’ve had it really long and really short and I like it in the middle. <<Same. I do want to go get it cut,layered and dyed for My birthday.

Can you remember the last time you felt emotional? What was the reason? tbh it was yesterday watching Keeping Up With The Kardashians. I watched the episode when Kim was robbed at gun point in Paris and I felt really bad for her. I can't beleive people think she made it up or planned it,people are such jerks.

Do you call your partner ‘baby’? Not really.

What if you were told that your life has to stay exactly as it is right now, and nothing will ever change? How would you feel about that? Um tbh staying stagnant and not going anywhere in life is a fear of mine. so I would not be happy with that,also I would like the pandemic to end.

What is a word that starts with the second to last letter of your name? Cherry

#survey #about me

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tabloidtoc · 4 years

Text

Globe, January 4

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Ghislaine Maxwell buying her way out of prison

Page 2: Up Front & Personal -- Gavin Rossdale playing tennis with his pup Chewy, Brooke Burke holding holiday balls topless, James Franco takes his cellphone into the sea

Page 3: Leighton Meester surfing in Malibu, Robbie Williams, Lisa Rinna wearing two masks

Page 4: Angelina Jolie is bracing for major humiliation after being dragged into Johnny Depp’s latest legal showdown with ex-wife Amber Heard -- Angie’s run-ins with Johnny who she starred with in 2010′s The Tourist are coming under intense scrutiny as Depp gears for a second court battle with Amber -- Angie and Johnny were so coy about their white-hot connection at the time even though their romance was an open secret but they got lucky because nobody had the smoking gun to prove it but now it’ll all come out in the open -- at the time Johnny was still dating Vanessa Paradis while Angie was five years into her doomed love-in with Brad Pitt -- there’s talk bisexual Amber was kind of obsessed with Angie so Angie is central to the plotline whether she likes it or not

Page 5: The Bachelor host Chris Harrison is worried he’ll follow Dancing with the Stars host Tom Bergeron out the door -- both these shows have been on TV forever and the world has changed around them and to keep up with Black Lives Matter and the #MeToo movement changes are being discussed and that’s left Chris fearing he’ll be the next Tom Bergeron and replaced by a woman of color

Page 6: Aging divas Loretta Lynn and Dolly Parton are caught in a bitter country catfight and long-dead Patsy Cline is the excuse -- although there’s been little love lost between the Nashville icons for nearly 50 years their simmering feud exploded weeks ago when Dolly apparently took some veiled public shots at Loretta’s BFF Patsy who was horribly disfigured in a car wreck two years before dying in a 1963 plane crash -- in an interview Dolly recalled standing in the wings of Nashville’s Grand Ole Opry at age 13 and watching Patsy perform and she remembered thinking about how awful it was that she got her pretty face scarred up like that -- Loretta was fit to be tied over the comments Dolly made about her old pal and thinks Dolly should stop running her mouth about Nashville legends like Patsy and Johnny Cash -- Dolly’s heard about Loretta’s complaints through the grapevine and brushes them off as quarantine boredom mixed with old age

Page 8: Blake Shelton’s going bonkers after fiancee Gwen Stefani told him she wants to skip the mega-million star-studded wedding shindig he’s been planning and elope -- Blake is all bent out of shape over Gwen’s latest switcheroo which calls for them to get hitched on the sly at a Mexican resort and she’s got him so mixed up he can’t think straight because for the longest time she wanted the Hollywood-style wedding with all the bells and whistles and was very particular about details but now she’s telling him to ditch those plans which have already cost them a small fortune and book a trip somewhere exotic so they can just just get it over with -- Gwen wants to elope so they can hitched at the Riviera Maya resort in Cancun where they could swap vows on the beach witnessed by her three sons and Blake has no choice but to give in to Gwen and he’s saying he’s fine with it as long as she’s sure this time

Page 9: Hollywood horndog John Mayer is back sniffing around old flame Jennifer Aniston after his mom gave him a shove -- John and Jen had a steamy fling for about a year before he dropped her in 2009 and now John’s mom Margaret Meyer is scolding him for letting Jen go and John’s mom is always on him about settling down and she feels that at 43 he should be married and she recently had a heart-to-heart talk with him and told him she thought Jennifer was the most down-to-earth of all his exes and because John considers his mom one of the smartest people he knows he decided to reach out to Jen and he’s always admired Jen and thought of her as a classy lady and now he’s reaching out to her again in hopes of getting her to agree to see him again once things leave lockdown

* FKA Twigs has socked actor Shia LaBeouf with a bombshell lawsuit claiming he subjected her to relentless physical, emotional and mental abuse and gave her an STD and she also accuses him of sexual battery, assault, and infliction of emotional distress -- although Shia says she’s lying Twigs insists Shia once choked her in the middle of the night and kept a loaded firearm by the bed leaving her terrified to get up at night for fear he’d think she was an intruder and shoot her -- she claims during an incident around Valentine’s Day 2019 Shia threatened to crash his speeding car unless she professed her love for him so when he pulled into a gas station she got out of the car but he threw her against the car while screaming in her face then forced her back into the car -- Shia also had rules about how often Twigs had to kiss and touch him -- Shia has been arrested several times on now-dismissed charges including assault and disorderly conduct

Page 10: John Lennon didn’t have to die -- that’s law enforcement experts’ explosive analysis after reviewing newly discovered evidence about the Beatles legend’s December 8, 1980 murder in NYC -- an odd series of coincidences and simple decisions put Lennon and his killer Mark David Chapman in the same place at the same time -- a review of the details concludes Lennon’s death was a strange result of flukes including his penchant for running around without protection and a missed appointment with his photographer and without these quirks of fate John would still be alive and recording hit songs

Page 12: Celebrity Buzz -- Pink flashes her bandaged thumb after getting stitches in Santa Monica (picture), Amanda Seyfried confesses she made a terrible decision for turning down the role of a lifetime as Chris Pratt’s love interest in Guardians of the Galaxy and now she’s watching from the sidelines as the director’s second choice Zoe Saldana skyrockets in the money-making Marvel franchise, Katherine Heigl will star in the upcoming limited biopic series Woodhull about Victoria Woodhull the first woman to run for president in 1872, Big Brother alum Zach Rance has come out as bisexual after admitting a sizzling same-sex romance with his former reality show housemate Frankie Grande who is the real-life older brother of pop star Ariana Grande

Page 13: Jaime King slurps down a meal on the streets on L.A. (picture), Jax Taylor mowing the lawn (picture), Guns N’ Roses axman Slash loads up on supplies at an L.A. grocery (picture), former teen heartthrob Chad Michael Murray admits his inflated young ego got the best of him and now he looks at photos of himself and thinks what a dweeb

Page 14: Julia Roberts is headed for the small screen headlining the limited TV series The Last Thing He Told Me where she’ll form an unexpected relationship with her teenage stepdaughter while searching for the truth about her husband’s mysterious disappearance, Emma Stone is also heading for the flat-screen in the comedy series The Curse alongside Nathan Fielder about a couple starring on an HGTV-style show who are trying to conceive a child amid an alleged curse, Nicolas Cage is hosting a new series called The History of Swear Words in which he’ll delve into the origins and pop culture usage and science and cultural impact of profanely shocking expletives

* Fashion Police -- Peyton List 8/10, Sofia Carson 9/10, Vanessa Hudgens 2/10, Neve Campbell 1/10, Chelsea Handler 4/10

Page 16: Cover Story -- Jeffrey Epstein’s madam Ghislaine Maxwell’s $30M jail break -- terrified and tortured Ghislaine risks family fortune to buy her freedom -- the accused sex predator and her fat cat inner circle are set to plunk down an obscene $30 million to buy her way out of federal prison in what outraged investigators fear is a brazen plot to cheat justice

Page 19: 10 Things You Don’t Know About Mayim Bialik

* Lizzo is admitting she’s having negative thoughts and is hating her 300-pound body but adds she knows she beautiful

* The Spice Girls were likely liquored up on cut-rate champagne when they made their first album according to Emma Bunton a.k.a. Baby Spice who says she and her bandmates swilled the cheapest sparkling wine in the studio

Page 20: True Crime -- a chilling message left by the elusive Zodiac Killer has finally been cracked by a team of code breakers after 51 years -- a hodgepodge of numbers, symbols and letters called the 340 cipher was sent to the San Francisco Chronicle in 1969 and lawmen believed it contained key clues to the serial killer’s identity but the truth is even more chilling -- according to the experts the message says I hope you are having lots of fun in trying to catch me, I am not afraid of the gas chamber because it will send me to paradise all the sooner because I now have enough slaves to work for me

Page 21: Caitlyn Jenner is terrified after learning her skin cancer has returned a second time -- she was diagnosed with basal cell skin cancer a few years ago and had an entire layer of skin removed from her nose -- since then she’s been slathering on sunscreen but a new red spot on the right side of her nose popped up along with some crusty areas on her scalp but the nose patch was not cancer but hypertrophic keratosis or scaly damage from sun exposure -- however the dozen spots on the top of her head was squamous cell carcinoma which is a skin cancer that’s known to be aggressive so her doctor burned off the offending spots -- her doctor recommended she replace her 1960 Austin-Healey convertible but the chances of Caitlyn selling her prized ride are slim

Page 23: Your 2021 Horoscope -- love, luck, health, wealth, happiness -- plus surprising celebrity predictions -- Elton John, Valerie Bertinelli, Johnny Depp, Jessica Simpson, Matthew Perry, Cameron Diaz, Will Smith, Katy Perry, Howie Mandel, Savannah Guthrie, Justin Timberlake, Carrie Underwood

Page 30: Larry King has reached a deal with estranged wife Shawn but she’s royally peeved about the payoff -- Larry has agreed to pay her a lump sum of $20,000 plus $33,000 a month in spousal support which lasts until at least their next scheduled hearing in April but Shawn claims the 33Gs only covers a third of her monthly nut which includes $25,000 for rent on her home, $12,000 on clothes, $3500 on groceries and $4500 for hair and nails and pet care and gym

Page 31: Kim Kardashian is reading husband Kanye West the riot act over his junk food benders that are sabotaging her healthy eating program and it’s led to more than a few arguments with no peace in sight -- he’s telling her to chill and let him live by his own terms but she can’t do that because it’s driving her crazy -- what really ticks Kim off is his junk food has totally taken over her section of fresh cut veggies, fruits and water and she wants him to get his own storage in a different part of the house where she won’t have to see it or hold her nose

* Kardashian momager Kris Jenner’s faux reality TV home is on the market for nearly $8 million even though she never lived there -- the L.A. estate was used for exterior shots of the image-conscious family’s compound on Keeping Up with the Kardashians but it was all for show -- dubbed the Iredell Estate the house also appears in True Blood and Chelsea Lately

Page 33: Health Report

Page 34: Wrestling Ring Kings: Where Are They Now? Sable, Bret Hart

Page 35: Lex Luger, Steve Austin, Ric Flair

Page 36: The Undertaker, Tito Santana, Diamond Dallas Page

Page 37: Kane, Kurt Angle, Sunny, Mick Foley

Page 39: Despite an astounding 30 No. 1 country music hits legendary singer Charley Pride took a haunting regret to his grave that he never made it as major league baseball star -- Charley had so much success but he died tormented his baseball career short-circuited -- Charley was singing and playing guitar by the time he was 14 but his real goal was to pitch for the New York Yankees -- Charley signed with a Yankees farm team as a flame-throwing phenom at 17 but in his rookie season he threw out his arm and was just never the same -- after he struck out in baseball he put his full energy into singing but faced an uphill battle -- Charley was the Jackie Robinson of country music and he endured a lot of racism

Page 40: Kelsey Grammer admits he often breaks down and blubbers like a baby and it makes him feel better and he cries when he’s upset or sad or scared and it provides him a lot of relief and he believes years of tragedy in his life taught him to cry as a healing mechanism and now he sheds tears whenever he has sad feeling bottled up inside him

* A moneybags James Bond fan coughed up a whopping $256,000 for the handgun 007 Sean Connery toted in the first spy epic Dr. No -- the disabled Walther PP semi-automatic was supposed to bring in no more than $200,000 but the unidentified American buyer who claims to have seen every Bond epic went even higher

Page 44: Straight Talk -- Miley Cyrus is now blabbing about why she broke up with husband Liam Hemsworth after years of togetherness and just nine months of marriage and it sounds like a case of the pot calling the kettle black

Page 45: Furious Queen Elizabeth has booted Princess Eugenie and her husband out of Prince Harry’s Frogmore Cottage home in a bit to foil Meghan Markle’s plan to completely cut him off from England and the royal family -- pregnant Eugenie and her booze-seller husband Jack Brooksbank were ordered to quit the cottage and move back to Kensington Palace just six weeks after Harry and Meghan secretly leased them the home meaning Harry and Meghan are still on the financial hook for Frogmore which was a gift from the queen and they will have to underwrite the cost of keeping up the property and it also ensures Harry has a home in Britain if he ever wants to come back -- by moving Eugenie and Jack out the queen has made sure Harry still has a place to hang his hat if he decides to come back to leave his American wife

Page 47: Bizarre But True

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amomentsescape · 4 years

Note

I always imagine that after Tony makes Michael the new leader of the Avengers and half inheritor of his fortune. He would take him to California to finally make amends with his "cursed" family and free them of the house (Yes, I believe he still got powers but there aren't dark anymore) and also he hears that there's a camp who got ghost in there trapped for almsot 30 years and thisis how he get to know his new friends. Xavier and Montana were his BFF. And thanks to Tony they got new identities.

A/N: I’m not the proudest of this one. There were a lot of timelines and situations to include, but I wasn’t able to get as detailed as I wanted. It would have become an actual novel if I had. I still hope this is up to par.

Warnings?: A few bad words if you look hard.

Saved (Avenger! Michael Langdon)

Tony gently placed a hand on Michael’s shoulder in hopes of bringing some amount of comfort to him.

It was hard for the boy to even look at the house before him, nonetheless actually step inside.

The Murder House.

It held so many memories for him, most of them being bad ones. But he knew what had to be done. He owed it to the spirits living in that house to finally set them free.

He forgave his ghostly father a long time ago for everything he had said and done. Michael still felt some amount of guilt for putting his grandmother through what he did as well.

He tried to ease his thoughts a bit. He knew the witches had already paid a visit to the house before he did. He also knew that they could have spread assumptions about him that were no longer accurate.

But even if they hated him for an eternity after, he knew that he would feel at ease for finally freeing them of this cursed house.

“Father,” Michael finally spoke out, “I think this should be a mission I go into alone.”

Tony looked over quickly as if to argue otherwise, but the look on Michael’s face told him that his decision was final.

Tony simply let his hand drop from his son’s shoulder, giving him a slight nod.

“If anything goes wrong, I’ll be there in an instant.”

Michael gave his father a smile, eventually shifting his gaze back to the house.

With a slight raise of his hand, he transported himself inside the building.

The moment his feet met the ground, he noticed the familiar gazes of his family, plus a few faces that he didn’t quite recognize.

“Michael,” someone spoke quietly.

And there before him was the one he used to called his grandmother. Her voice sunk deep, the feelings of past disappointment and fear washing back up inside of him.

She reached out and placed her hand on his face. The cold contact sent a chill down his spine as he thought back to a time that seemed so far away.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.

Constance shook her head, dropping her hand down.

Michael let out a deep sigh.

“I’m here to set you free,” he whispered.

Tony watched as a teenage boy and girl ran out of the house, hand-in-hand. The boy had a smile etched into his face, and the girl continuously let out small giggles of pure bliss.

Tony looked back to the home and watched many more figures walk out. Their eyes were glossed over with a happiness that they had almost forgotten.

And finally, once everyone cleared out, Michael took a step into the sun. His hand was placed on the shoulder of a woman.

Tony knew who she was almost instantly.

She looked around, her gaze lifting up towards the sky.

Her face was unreadable, and her hands shook slightly as she reached for the boy’s arm.

“This house had always been my home- my life.”

Michael looked to her as she spoke. His mouth quirked up into a small smile.

“You get a chance at a new one, Grandma.”

She turned to him quickly, pulling him into a sudden hug.

A few more words were shared before she walked off the property, giving Tony a slight nod of her head and a smile.

Michael finally reached Tony, a satisfied look on his features.

“How do you feel, Son?”

The younger man let out a soft chuckle, running his hand through his hair.

“Perfect. Everyone finally gets what they should have received a long time ago.”

Tony gave a strong pat to Michael’s back.

“As old as this house is, I expected more people to leave,” he responded.

Michael let his smile drop a bit, thinking over his reply.

“There was.” He paused for a moment. “There are spirits still in that house that shouldn’t be allowed to leave.”

He turned to his father.

“I did what I could for the ones that deserved it. But there are some that even I can’t help,” he finished.

Tony turned back to the house, seeing a few faces within the windows of the desolate building.

“As a hero, we have to make decisions. Some will be easy, some will be difficult. Our job is to protect, and sometimes that means choosing a decision that hurts others,” Tony responded lightly.

Michael relaxed at this, considering what was being said.

Before he could reply, Tony continued on.

“There’s another place. The souls are no less innocent, but they have found themselves in the same situation as these ones did. I know you feel that empathy towards their pain.”

Michael felt his jaw tighten as he looked to the ground. He knew what had to be done. Even if some of the spirits had done wrong, it would only be fair to release the ones that didn’t- the ones who did nothing but good in their lives.

Michael took a deep breath in.

“Well, then what are we waiting for?”

——————————————————————————

The abandoned camp was different, to say the least.

The amount of spirits there was enough stress alone. Not to mention, Michael came face to face with his literal doppelgänger- a doppelgänger in tight shorts.

“I told you, Montana! I knew I should have grown out my hair,” Xavier spoke, motioning to Michael.

The blonde next to him rolled her eyes.

“It wouldn’t have done much considering you’re dead.”

Xavier simply scoffed back at her.

Michael spoke up, trying to end the argument before it started.

“I’m sorry. You said you’ve been trapped here since... when, exactly?”

Chet stepped up before Montana could respond.

“Since the fucking 80′s, man.”

“Oh! Do you have a phone? The one with the touchy glass?” Montana jumped in, excitement in her eyes.

Tony put up his hand in an attempt to silence them.

“You can get your own touchy glass phone once we get you all out of here.”

They were already told about finally being released, but there were still some problems that hadn’t been worked out yet.

Montana laughed.

“All of us? Even Ramirez? Aren’t you guys supposed to be superheroes or something? Releasing Ramirez is practically asking for Satan himself,” she laughed dryly at her own comment. “Oh, and good luck keeping him here too. If it wasn’t for us, he would have upped and left by now.”

Michael could only stand there and think.

They were right. That man was a psychopath taken over by an evil being that was once Michael’s father. And now that Satan knew his “son” was there, he would only allow Ramirez to bring even more wrath to the world.

He looked to Tony, only to be met with the soft eyes that he was afraid of seeing. Tony knew what had to be done, and so did Michael.

He had promised himself that he would never do such a thing again. But there were some promises that just had to be broken.

Michael began to walk past the small group of ghosts, making his way to the evil presence that he could sense.

“And where the fuck does he think he’s going?” Montana spat out in disbelief. “That boy is asking for a death sentence.”

Tony just let out a slight chuckle.

“He can handle himself.”

It didn’t take long for him to do what he had to.

Ramirez immediately charged at him once he awoke from his dead slumber. Michael sent the two guys keeping watch off to meet the others, leaving them alone.

Before Ramirez could even touch Michael however, he was thrown back to the deteriorating wall by an unseen force, struggling to get his feet back on the ground.

He began to laugh wickedly, his dark eyes meeting Michael’s outstretched hand.

“I see you made an offer to the Devil as well,” he said hoarsely.

Michael simply shook his head, his stomach twisting in knots.

He had to do it.

“Not the Devil,” Michael finally spoke, “my father.”

And with a sudden twist of his hand, Ramirez went up in flames.

Before the fire had completely engulfed him, Michael saw the slight look of shock on his face.

Burning Ramirez wasn’t going to be enough alone. Michael knew he had to destroy his soul as well, sending him to where he belonged.

He was going to get his own personal Hell, one that he would never escape.

Eventually, the serial killer was nothing more than ashes, and Michael was free to head back.

Releasing the rest of the spirits wasn’t difficult.

They wanted to leave, and so they did.

The only ones that didn’t immediately take off were Xavier, Montana, and Trevor. They could only thank Michael, repeating over and over how grateful they were for finally being released.

However, they had nowhere to go. They had each other, and that was about it.

Michael turned to Tony for some type of suggestion, and with a kind smile, Tony offered them a life they couldn’t refuse.

Montana and Trevor were given the opportunity to open up their own studio, coaching a wide array of members. Surprisingly, they really enjoyed teaching their own spin class, making every Friday an 80′s theme.

And Tony helped Xavier get his own acting portfolio. With a new name and a clean slate, he was free to start his career without any prior baggage. Plus, he so happened to love the current trends making their way in social media (he’s a big fan of Instagram).

But the one thing that the three former ghosts appreciated most was the family bond they formed with Tony and Michael.

They all became incredibly close, and they planned on visiting each other frequently.

He may not have saved their lives, but he gave them a new one. And for that, they were eternally grateful.

#michael langdon #michael langdon fanfiction #michael langdon imagine #american horror story imagines #american horror story one shot #american horror story #AHS #ahs fandom #ahs fanfiction #tony stark #marvel #murder house #ahs 1984 #ahs murder house #Avengers #The Avengers

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gophergal · 4 years

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🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻!!! You don't have to answer 5 if you don't want to. Also, my guinea pigs says hi. :3

YOU UNDERESTIMATE MY ABILITY TO RAMBLE BRO

1. I feel really bad for not having written for a few months, but I also know that writing when I don't feel inspired to is like pulling teeth. I just really want to get a few ideas on the page and out of my head. Specifically, I have a long form Normal Michael AU in mind that I love dearly, but can't bring myself to start. I guess I just don't want to quit anymore fic projects. Like, I had one from when I was in the Hetalia Fandom that was a fallout 3 au and I've gone back and read it. It's actually not that bad, I'm just sad I'll never finish it. I want to, but I'm really not the same person who started it, so I don't think I could do anything with it.

2. Speaking of writing, I have so many projects in mind, but here's another one I can't bring myself to write and abandon! So, I've spoken before about a gay little surreal fantasy story I wrote in freshman year. Well, I've really wanted to rewrite it!! But!! It's so much effort!!!! I can tell you a little about it:

so, a boy (I imagined him to be like 17 or something) has become the man of the house due to his father passing of an illness during the previous autumn. It is late winter and his mother and sisters desperately need him to bring home game to eat. All hope is nearly lost- then he finds a glorious, shining white stag in the woods. The majestic creature does not move, nor even react as it stares at the boy, his bow pointed at it. Ultimately, he decides it would be a great loss for the world should he kill it, and spares it. The rest of the hunt is smooth and full of luck, and he takes home enough for his family to last well into spring. A few years after that desperate winter, a newcomer moves to the village: a smith with pure, silvery hair.

3. I know that all I've posted here for y'all to read has just been VERY straight forward smut with feelings, but I love surreal stories. Horror, fantasy, drama? I don't care, I love surrealism. There's just something both comfortable and unnerving about it. I guess it's just because it reminds me of my own dreams, which are truly a mixed bag of scary and sad. A while back, as in a year or so, I had a dream that my mom faked her death and came home. I cried really hard when I woke up and just had a piss poor day after. A few months ago I had a very disturbing and graphic dream about twin Nicholas Cage farmers brutalising eachother. That one actually shook me to my core upon waking. I was scared and confused at first, but it faded within my first hour of consciousness. Then there are just the really weird Lewd Dreams which, idk man, I completely disagree with the guys who say that we dream only of things we wish to have.

4. I've noticed that a big part of why I haven't really done any big projects lately is because I get worried that if I don't post actual art very often, the three to five people that actually follow me because they like what I do will forget all about me. Being forgotten, even online, is a huge fear of mine. Like, that's what I fear about death and aging, not the pain of the nothingness, the being forgotten after. That's one of the reasons that the amnesia tropes make me so sad! Like, example being botw, cause I'm a bit obsessed again. Link doesn't remember anything at first, and then it's implied that his memory is patchy afterward. Is he the same person? Zelda is heavily implied to be in love with him, but imagine being in that situation. The person you once loved no longer remembers you. They're far different now and don't have the same qualities you cherished... Would you still love them, or just the ghost that exists in your mind every time you look at them?

5. OK SORRY THAT'S BEEN REALLY SAD. UHHHH, HAPPY THOUGHT NOW-

I love that I've been basically adopted as a mom/big sister friend to some of my friends. I have a friend IRL who goes to my school that's still 14 so she calls me Art Mom. It's so funny to me, I'm one of the least motherly/nurturing people I know! I guess it's also fun that I've been adopted as daughter/little sister friend too. They're both a bit funny since they're so different. That's the neat thing about human interaction I suppose! No matter what, your relationship to two different people will never be the same! My dynamic with my bff irl is very different to my bff online. For example, IRL bff and I are so close that people have genuinely confused for sisters or girlfriends depending on the situation. When we have sleepovers, we cuddle every time. It's great. She's been there for me for years and I'm so grateful for her every day. Online BFF and I have our entire dynamic based on respecting boundaries. We both are checking in with the other frequently to be sure that we're both comfortable. That's very different from many other friendships I've had. Like, believe it or not, I'm very reserved and quiet irl! Usually, the first boundary that gets stepped over is my Bad Social days where speaking is really difficult for me. Online BFF just needs to see me say "hey sorry, it's a bad social day and I'm having trouble talking" and they get it. They're so patient with me, even when I don't feel deserving and - UGH I HAVE GREAT FRIENDS GODDAMN IT WHY ARE Y'ALL SO NICE?????

#gooher rambles #TELL YOUR GUINEA PIGS I SAID HI BACK #I ALWAYS WANTED A GUINEA PIG AS A KID BRO #BUT WE COULDN'T HAVE ANY CAUSE OF MY CATS

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recklessrex · 4 years

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Jellicle-ho did this and now I also want to rank my favorite Cats. So I wrote this instead of writing about Sullivan.

Long Post Warning

To start with I don't hate/dislike any of them. The ones toward the bottom of the list tend to be ones I just think about less often, or don't feel like I connect to as well. Based on 1998 for simplicity's sake.

1) Munkustrap

My baby. Munk's always been my favorite from the very start. It's not just the hero thing, it's not just that Michael Gruber's a handsome mf, it's how he interacts with the others. He's so loving and protective, but at the same time so done with everyone's bullshit (when bullshittery occurs). And then there's the underlying anxiety issues we're all pretty sure he deals with that makes me just want to hug him. He just so clearly wants everyone to be happy and safe. It melts my heart how much joy he gets from seeing his tribe happy. Watch when Deuteronomy shows up in 1998, after he greets him himself (before which he steps aside so others can greet him first cuz he's a sweetheart), he spends most of the walk to the stairs soaking in how happy all the others are and being utterly overjoyed. Add to that his deep, devoted love for his father and how diligently he looks after him, his clear affection for his little brother Tugger despite being more done with his bullshit than anyone else's (Tugger don't touch the bagpip. Tugger no), his strong, tender bond with Alonzo and how smoothly they work together in a crisis, and his sometimes subtle, sometimes not-so-subtle crush on Demeter (notice that she's the only one other than Alonzo that HE approaches right before the Gumbie Cat and the only one he uses both hands to reach out to during that). Also his snark and sass, when he lets it out, is an utter joy. And I love the way he can assert his dominance with just a glance if the situation calls for it (watch him with Cassandra in Grizabella's first scene), but still rarely ever pulls rank like that. Overall he's a really fun character to watch for me, as well as to think about and (if I get around to it) write about.

2) Demeter

My other baby. (I'm so happy my two babies love each other). She's such a complex character. Her backstory of abuse and her current dealings with PTSD as a result are only the jumping off point. I love her moments of bravery, like jumping on Mac to protect the tribe despite everything she's been through. Courage isn't about not being afraid, it's about doing what needs to be done despite your fears. She's the most courageous member of the tribe and I love her so much. As for her relationships with the others, she has a much less subtle crush on Munk than he does on her, but she's so shy about it (and he's so damn polite) I doubt they'd ever get off the ground without a little help. She's so adorable in the way she looks at him, in 1998 she has a particular smile different from her other smiles that seems to be just for him. I also love her connection with Bomba, I feel like if she and Munk ever got off the ground it would be with Bomba's encouragement. Bomba is always there to hold her up when she feels small. While Munk makes her feel safe, Bomba makes her feel strong. So this is why Demelustrap is my OT3 thank you for coming to my TED talk.

3) Mungojerrie

Acts like a dumbass, is actually a genius. (Fight me). I love characters like this. Contradictions. Like brave strong Munk who is actually more emotionally vulnerable than he lets on, or nervous timid Demeter who bravely confronted the person she fears most. Mungo seems fundamentally clueless in most situations but I think he's just a carefree goofball, at least when the stakes are low. He and Teazer are both clever enough to get away with all sorts of mischief, and I don't think it's a "Teazer is the smart one" situation. I mean Teazer is probably smarter, but they need smarts on both sides. I also love how smoothly they work together as a team. Mungo ranks higher for those adorable "clueless" moments and for being a lovable goof.

4) Rumpleteazer

Acts like a bimbo, is actually a genius. To a lesser extent than Mungo in that she acts way less clueless than he does, and her antics are usually more obviously silliness rather than dumbassery. Would be higher but I just like Mungo's goofy aesthetic a bit more. I'd also like to take this time to note I do NOT think they are siblings. (Fight me. Again)

5) Mistoffolees

Another of those contradictions I love. He's simultaneously shy and showy, bold and insecure. He doesn't quite know who he is yet, but he knows who he wants to be. He's also adorable to watch, with his little hops and poses. His relationship with Tugger is adorable, whether you see them as mates or BFFs (both? both. both is good), and his obvious crush on Victoria is equally adorable (more NOT siblings!). The way he melts when she smiles at him toward the beginning of 1998 *sigh* so cute

6) Alonzo

Sorry @jellicle-ho I do love him lots, but he doesn't make the top five simply because I feel closer to Misto and the Chaos Twins (just an expression, not siblings!) on a spiritual level. He's still one of the best characters. He has his "contradiction" element of being cocky but somewhat insecure, and I especially love that he's just as serious as he is playful. He's also a slinky, sassy bastard and a blast to watch on stage.

7) Victoria

Woo boy. Okay first of all, since it seems to be a major factor, the contradiction element. She seems like a shy, reserved, almost demure young lady at first, but she's actually that quietly sassy serene girl at the Alpha bitch's lunch table, the one that's actually nice and doesn't participate in putting down the weird kid no one likes. But she's still gonna judge you. I love every moment of Victoria-sideeye in the 1998 video. And of course there's her whole side plot which basically revolves around her being extremely DTF, which is quite the opposite of "demure." Also her obvious crush on Misto is also adorable, the way she smiles at him, ugh like the only reason she danced with Plato instead is because Misto was too shy to approach her (also Plato has much better upper body strength so hey ho, hey hue, let's go Pas de Deux). She's also so very graceful and elegent and then there's her "omg why!?" flexibility which make her fascinating to watch.

8) Pouncival

Precious child. Precious little jackass brat. No but really I love him so much he's such a brat but also like he's tiny? And he wants to be cool sooo bad! The way he runs in for his "and bright!" all excited, I just can't. He has this sort of quiet, but enthusiastic demeaner of someone that knows he's not the star, but hopes to be, and he's bursting with energy in a pseudo-controlled way that I find more compelling than Etcetera's brand of enthusiasm. I love his acrobatics, whether they're super smooth, adorably clumsy, or straight up pratfalls. I love how 14-years-old he is. You can see him getting bored in that teenage "okay grampa you've told this story forty times already" kind of way during part of Gus's song. I love how adorably menacing he looks during the Naming of Cats. I just love the baby. He is very baby.

9) Bombalurina

She's beauty. She's grace. She'll smack you in the face. She's sexy and she knows it. She's such a confident, strong woman, and while she's the most overtly sexualized character, I kind of find it's even more empowering, you know? Like the idea that a woman can be both sexy and strong, she doesn't have to pick one. Bomba is walking proof that being strong, bold, and tough is not inherently "masculine," nor is protecting others. Don't get me wrong, I love strong female characters of all varieties, I'm not here to knock the tomboy trope, but when a strong female character is also sexually liberated it's just a different level of empowerment. Not just the deconstruction of "masculine/feminine" lines, but also in the "my body, my life, my choice" kind of way. Further, I absolutely love her relationship with Demeter. I personally support the mates, bffs, and siblings hcs because they honestly work so well as any of these (but as mentioned above, Demelustrap is my OT3, despite not always getting strong Bombastrap vibes). Her protectiveness and desire to comfort Demeter is so beautiful. Maybe it's the contradiction thing that I love so much. Strong, bold Bomba has her most tender moments when looking after Demeter. Idk. Moving on!

10) Rum Tum Tugger

He's beauty. He's… grace? He probably won't smack you in the face. He's sexy and he SO knows it. Tugger is walking proof that certain stereotyped "feminine" traits aren't inherently feminine, or to put it another way, he breaks down what it means to be "masculine." Think about it. Cares about his looks, beautiful luxurious long hair, wiggles his hips, wiggles his hips more, wiggles his hips when he walks, struts like a model on a runway, shakes his chest to be sexy, idolizes a cute boy, fashionable clothes (knee-bandana ftw!), all stereotypical "girly" traits, but would anyone describe Tugger as "girly"? Anyway, that's not even what I love most about him. I actually used to dislike him as a kid, but these days I can't get enough of him. Most of the time he just oozes positive vibes in one way or another, be it party vibes or laid back vibes. Most of his screentime in 1998 is such a good time because of that. He has such an energy and ferocity to him during his dance numbers, especially the second half of the Jellicle Ball in 1998. And then there's his quiet moments, especially the affection he shares with Munk while singing about their dad (omg the respect and affection he feels for both of them, coming from such a self-loving bastard it just ahhhhhh), and then after Deuteronomy comes back I just can't he's so sweet omg. Not to mention his whole relationship with Misto. Aside from the whole idolizing thing, which is adorable, he also is so supportive and encouraging. He just naturally bleeds confidence and good vibes, but he deliberately offers that confidence to Misto when he needs it. It's so beautiful and I'm gonna cry. I used to ship him with Bomba, but these days I hc them as friends with occasional benefits that like to place bets on how far interactions between Munk and Deme will go before one of them chickens out or gets awkward, and on which one will be the awkward chicken this time.

Wow I talked a lot about Tugger and he's only #10. Okay well, you folks ready to get controversial?

11) Macavity

I know I know, hear me out. I know most people interpret him as a total bastard with no redeeming qualities but like, I don't read him that way? Anyway I have complicated feelings about Mac but I'll get more into it in another post. As a character in the show I do really like him as a villain, I love his laugh, I love his "no look guys it's okay I brought him back see he's over there heheheh" gesture before he shows up in disguise, I love how show-boaty and "totally hyped for this" he is when he reveals himself, I love his "no wait please don't hurt me it's cool I'm leaving" gesture at Alonzo after the Jellicles start ganging up on him, he's just a blast of a character really, whether he's redemable or not.

12) Old Deuteronomy

Sweetest man you'll ever know. His compassion for the entire tribe is so sweet it hurts. He even feels love and understanding for Griz, and (futiley) tries to persuade the others to accept her, even subtley scolding them after the first "Memory" with his "Moments of Happiness." He loves his sons especially, and I adore every moment he interacts with either of them. He also can bring the sass, see his 'chin up' posture before Tugger bows to him, which I always read as them playfully teasing each other, or his little eye-roll when Munk gets a bit extra talking about the fire brigade. On that note, how into Munk's little play he is, even though it's going wrong. He keeps making encouraging gestures at Munk and reacting with surprise at the right moments (when Munk is looking at least lol). Anyway he's great moving on.

13) Jennyanydots

Jenny is that cool aunt that hangs out and has fun but also won't put up with your nonsense. She's so great I love her so much. She's honestly just a blast all the time I love her so much what can I say? I hc her as teaching Tumblebrutus how to sew. I don't know why.

14) Electra

Ah the "quiet" kitten. I read her as the tough tomboyish one of the girl kittens, and I hc her as sort of in training as a protector, and that's why she's more serious than the others. In 1998 she seems to look up to Munk, being the first to greet him before Gumbie Cat, and nuzzling him during Old Deuteronomy. 1998 Electra also has a lot of little adorable motions like licking her paws during Old Deuteronomy and retrieving the Peke paw from the middle of stage and than posing/playing with it during the Pekes and the Pollicles. I also love her freckles and her pink arm warmer. Massively underrated character.

15) Tumblebrutus

SPINNY. BALLET. BOI. Nuff said. But I'm gonna say more. He keeps up with Misto in ballet and exceeds Pounce in acrobatics, and as such is fascinating to watch. Also Brutus's struggle between his playful instincts and his desire to impress his elders is so adorable.

16) Admetus/George

First of all I first knew him as Admetus long long ago, and he will always be Admetus to me. Sorry. Second, omg this lovely, happy, wonderfully expressive boi. His face at literally any point in 1998 is such a gem.

17) Jemima

Speaking of great expressions, how bout Jemima? She's so cute and sweet! I love her whole deal of understanding Griz's pain and trying to get the rest of the tribe to understand. The only reason she's not higher up is because I somehow don't emotionally connect with her like I do some of the other kittens.

18) Coricopat

The more laid-back and playful half of the mystic twins. The twins in general are cool af, but Corico ranks higher for being more relatable.

19) Skimbleshanks

BUBBLY. TRAIN. DAD. Nuff said. Buttttt I'm gonna say more! Skimble is your best friend's dad that is always chaperoning on field trips but that's okay because he's actually pretty fun to be around most of the time. I love his cheerful expressions and his little jigs. His song is so much fun. And I love the relationship between him and Spara in 1998. More on that below

20) Asparagus

Okay so Spara is your other best friend's dad (or your best friend's other dad) who sometimes tries too hard to be cool and connect with the kids but that's okay because he's so nice and besides it's kind of adorable? What I find most adorable about Spara though is how hard he's crushing on Skimble. Like even if you hc them as already in a relationship, he really just can't get enough of Train Dad. Look at how Spara smiles at Skimble ALL THE DAMN TIME. He's practically blushing at multiple points during Skimble's song. And Skimble tends to gravitate towards Spara quite a bit, and omg that big grin he gives him during the line "sleeping car exprrrrreeesss!" I'm dead. In conclusion I need more Asparashanks content thank you for coming to my TED talk

21) Cassandra

I WANT to like Cassandra better than I do. I really really want to. But I feel like she's just so hard to get to know. I do enjoy her on stage, but as a character with backstory and motives she's a bit hard to work with. That being said she's by no means a flat character. I do hc her as one of the deputy protectors along with Alonzo, and more recently as part of the BFF power trio of her, Alonzo, and Munk, since Alonzo and much more subtley Munk are the only ones she shows any physical affection toward, aside from occasionally hanging out with T-brutus but we'll shelve that for now. I do really enjoy watching her though, she has some really interesting movements and expressions. And she does radiate a sort of "try me, I fucking dare you" vibe that I love a lot.

22) Tantomile

I have the same problem with Tanto that I do with Cass. I just don't feel like I know her very well. She is cool as a mystical psychic character, but that's part of what makes the twins in general cool. So far I haven't been able to connect to her as an individual without her brother, otherwise she would be much higher on this list. She's still cool though.

22) Plato

*Deep breath* okay. I don't dislike Plato. I just.. okay look out of the male kittens/young adults, he's my least favorite. He does have qualities that I really like, like how he's a shy reserved boy on the outside and a fiery passionate soul on the inside. That's cool. Also those intense expressions are pretty cool I guess. I guess I might have less positive feelings about him because everyone assumes Victoria's magically in love now because of the Pas de Deux even though they barely interact otherwise. Which is unfair of me to feel that way. I hc him as struggling with internalized anger and anxiety and having difficulty expressing himself.

23) Etcetera

I'll be honest, I used to find her annoying. This one's pretty much entirely on me, because she has a superficially similar demeanor to a girl that used to bully me in school. But since graduating Cety's grown on me a lot, not in small part due to her wonderful enthusiasm for literally everything. While less compelling to me than Pounce's quieter, more controlled flavor of energetic enthusiasm, her bouncy jubilance still makes me grin and giggle along with her, so that's a major plus.

24) Jellylorum

Jelly is your other cool aunt that worries too much about your safety but also has cool stories to tell and is always doing like art and stuff in her garage. I hc her as the tribe nurse. Would be higher if not for slight Karen-ness.

25) Gus

Only on stage for a short time but he shines. The way he starts out all helpless looking like he doesn't even know where he is and slowly blossoms into singing about his old days with enthusiasm, and then breaking down into tears. He's a great character for the scene that he's in, but unfortunately there's not a lot else to him, so he gets a low spot on the list

26) Grizabella

Oof. Okay so. I get it. She messed up. My hc is… well, complicated, but short version is she never planned on being a mom and has no idea how to be a mom, and so she just let Deut raise Munk and visited occasionally (ahem rarely), but she does end up later spending some time as his primary caregiver, and she fucks up royally, like massive neglect and mild emotional manipulation, and ends up emotionally damaging Munk more than if she'd left him alone. SO with this hc in mind, is she redemable? Idk. But the tribe forgave her so that's what matters. Do I feel sorry for her? Yes. Do I believe she honestly regrets her past actions? …kind of? Yes. Let's go with yes. Does any of this make her my favorite character? Not by a long shot. I have mixed feelings about Grizabella. I don't dislike her I just… don't know how to feel about her.

27) Bustopher Jones

Walking fat joke, but a pleasant walking fat joke. Wish we could have got to know him better than "that cultured fat guy all the toms want to impress." He's fun though. I love his expressions throughout his song, and that toodle-pip! is so adorable.

28) Exotica

Oh Exotica. Who even are you. We don't know you at all. I do like the moment in Old D's song when she's reaching from the outside of the crowd hoping to get to touch him, and he reaches out so she can, and immediately after touching him she drops her hand and backs away, which I read as shy fangirl overload flee the scene omg he touched me omgomgomg. So that was cute. Ummm. I wish she'd stop changing colors every three seconds so I could keep track of her. Other than that, I don't dislike her, I just don't know her well enough to like her.

Omg I made it to the end. Did I forget anybody? I don't think so... Phew, that was so hard! Thanks for reading if you made it this far! :)

#cats musical #long post #cats characters #i ain't tagging all of them #sorry #cats rankings

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aspiestvmusings · 4 years

Text

ZEP S1 END SPOILERS

SPOILERS FOR UPCOMING EPISODES/END OF SEASON

for ZOEY’S EXTRAORDINARY PLAYLIST (NBC)

EPISODE TITLES & SUMMARIES

1x10 Zoey’s Extraordinary Outburst

Air date: Sunday, April 19th

Summary: Zoey surprisingly finds herself getting into major conflict with Simon, Max, Mo and even Howie. Tensions arise at SPRQ Point when the 4h and 6th floors compete over an important piece of code. Mitch and Maggie try to celebrate their anniversary.

#Drkpoint #4thFloorVS6thFloor #SingOff #MaxToTheMax

Songs: “The Boy is Mine” by Monica & Brandy [Team 4th Floor/Joan VS Team 6th Floor/Ava] & “Here I Go Again” by Whitesnake [Max] & TBA [choreo!] + songs by: Al Green, Ed Sheeran, “Icona Pop” & "Tears for Fears” (reprise)

1x11 Zoey’s Extraordinary Mother

Air date: Sunday, April 26th, 2020

Summary: Zoey has to figure out a clever way to help her mother with an impossible decision. Max unexpectedly bonds with Leif. Mo hits a rough-patch with Eddie.

#ZoeysDad #MaxAndLeif (wait..what?) #famousgueststars #ZoeyAndJoanGirlsNightOut #KaraokeNight #surprisingsongchoices

Songs: "Bye Bye Bye” by N’Sync [Max +]; “All Out of Love” by “Air Supply” [Leif]; “Felling Good” by Nina Simone [the widow AKA Bernadette Peters’ character], “We’ve Gotta get Out of This Place” by “The Animals [by Maggie], “Issues” by Julia Michaels [Mo #whatavoice] + Songs by: Billy Ray Cyrus, Montell Jordan, The Young Bloods. #canyouguessthesongnow

1x12 Zoey’s Extraordinary Dad (S1 Finale)

Air date: Sunday, May 3rd

Summary: After hearing an ominous song (”BMR”) Zoey does everything in her power to stop something bad from happening.

#ZoeysDad #ZoeyAndMitchDance #TeamSong #LoveTriangleCOMEDY #howdidtheyfitsomuchintoonesingleepisodeagain #wewillseesomefamiliarfacesagain Yes, some of the guest character we’ve seen earlier this season, are back. And yes, there is quite a bit of Max (and Max/Clarkeman’s) in this episode...for those of us, who are fans of Z/M.

Songs: "Bad Moon Rising” by Creedence Clearwater Revival (Zoey), “I Will Follow Him” by Little Peggy March (by Mo....about Eddie), "All of Me” by John Legend [Max], "Jealous” by Nick Jonas [Simon], “Goodbye My Angel/Lullaby” by Billy Joel [Mitch & David] & "American Pie” [Team Song/Cast of ZEP] #reprisetime “True Colours” + a few more surprises (by Max, by Maggie] PS. NO OTHER SONGS WILL BE REVEALED BEFPRE THE EPSIODE HAS AIRED....AS THEY WOULD REVEAL TOO MUCH ABOUT THE PLOT.

SPOILER QUOTES:

NEW!

“Well, Simon is back from Vegas in ep 12/S1 Finale. He comes back to see Max and Zoey in a way that he’s a little bit surprised about, where they’re doing something that he thought was very much their own thing. So that takes Simon by surprise. And then Zoey starts to see Max in a new light in this episode, and by seeing Max in this new light, it ends up taking their relationship into a surprise direction. Zoey’s relationships with both Max and Simon actually get to a new point over the course of Episode 12.” - Austin Winsberg #cheesequake #whosawthatcoming

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NEW!

S1 finale of ZEP features a 7-minute scene that was captured in a single shot (aka “a oner”). “We rehearsed it for two weeks leading up to the shooting of it. It required massive coordination amongst many different departments in order to get it right, and it’s probably the number — or certainly one of the numbers — that I’m most proud of all season.” - teases showrunner Austin Winsberg.

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NEW!

“I don’t know how Zoey would end up singing again...anymore” [In S2...after that one time in 1x08 during her glitch] - Jane [”Oh, right...” - Skylar] Skylar & Jane IG Live

hmmm... what does this mean? Why “can’t” she sing anymore after S1? Is it cause there’s no “dad’s declining health” reason? Is it cause she has no voice/ability to speak anymore? Is it cause...

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NEW!

Question: What is the scoop on Zoey and Max from Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist? I’m dying to know if these two have chance of being together by the Season 1 finale. What is in store for them? –Ashley Answer: I delivered your Q to Austin Winsberg, creator of the NBC freshman, and he wrote back, “Zoey and Max’s relationship will continue to evolve and change in surprising ways for the rest of this season and beyond. By the end of Episode 12 (airing in early May), I believe Zoey and Max fans will feel like these two have been on a real journey together — and also that their journey is, in fact, just beginning.”

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“On top of the health issues with her father, Zoey's also got two other men in her life who were already making her life complicated even before she finds herself uncontrollably singing her emotions. Some particular musical numbers in ep 1x08 result in some awkward conversations with engaged coworker Simon and BFF Max, continuing this rocky romantic journey Jane's been on all season, though Levy thinks they're both being a little unfair. "She will continue to go down both roads, and you know, they are different roads, and one I think is messier than the other," she says. "In my opinion, I'm kind of like, give Zoey a break. Why does she have to choose anything? She never promised anything to these people, she hasn't broken any promises. She's like dealing with extremely stressful and painful moments in her life and like these men need to give her a goddamn break." It doesn't sound like they will be giving her a break anytime soon, but Levy did tease a finale number between Zoey and Max that is "sweet, funny, sexy" and the audience is going to lose their minds over it.” - Jane

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“Zoey is someone who is not in touch with her feelings or is constantly running away from her feelings or burying her true feelings so she can be good at her job or not make things fall apart with her awkward personality. So for me, with each of these songs, the “Zoe-ality” had to be a deep desire [but] then when you cut back to reality, you’re back to Zoey covering up her feelings, being the Type A coder girl who’s just trying to solve problems and doesn’t want to really admit what’s going on inside of her, whether it’s her crush on her best friend or wanting to have sex with a coworker or knowing her boss did something unethical.” - Jane

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“You’ll get a lot more from both relationships (Z/M & Z/S..after 1x08). There will be a lot more intimacy between Zoey & Simon, and Zoey & Max. And there is a number in our finale that was one of my favorite things we did and it involves one of them. It is a love scene with two musical numbers and it’s funny and sexy and really cute all at the same time.” - Jane

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“We never wanting to make it (Simon vs Max) feel like a competition or a choice. Because that doesn't only preserve our characters, but it really protects Zoey. Zoey is nobody's prize and she's nobody's to claim or win over. So we do love the idea that there's a Team Max and Team Simon thing. But we tend to, when in performance, really take care of each other. There are scenes that Simon and Max have down the line and they have some difficult conversations. There's an obvious way to play all those scenes; they can be sizing each other up, looking at each other up and down, a game-on type of mentality. John and I have never seen it that way.” - Skylar

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“What I love about Max and Zoey is that even though she's pressured in that moment, she still does feel like she can tell Max. I think that that says a lot about their friendship and about their relationship. There's only very few people that know about this superpower that she has. It's very brave and daring of her to do that. The cards are out on the table now; she can't ever make any excuses for why she's acting a certain way towards him. It's really bold.” - Skylar

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“There's two ways of seeing it [Z telling M about her powers]. There's, "Oh my God, thank you so much for telling me. Now everybody knows and everybody can live happily ever after." Or there's the feeling of, "Wow, there's been a betrayal. You're telling me you knew all this stuff?" As Zoey begins to let people in on her powers throughout the season, it's going to be interesting to see what people are really there for her and are understanding, and what people can't handle this new information.” - Skylar

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“While Levy won't reveal how Zoey's heart songs change things for her moving forward, she does tease that this episode [1x08] is going to have far-reaching ramifications, but not in the way you might expect. "It turns out to be positive," she says. "A lot of our show’s message is that we are all the same, the human condition is complex but we’re all going through it together. You don’t know what the person beside you is going through but you might actually relate to their pain or desires. Zoey admitting these things that are so horrific to her actually makes people understand her in this way that she doesn’t allow when she’s being her emotionally awkward, neurotic self. And Zoey going through this will make her even more empathetic and compassionate to other people’s experiences, especially when she hears their heart songs moving forward." - Jane

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“One thing that we can tease is that we have two big Broadway Tony-winners coming in, in the next few episodes. Renée Elise Goldsberry from Hamilton plays Joan’s work rival, and Bernadette Peters comes in, in Episode 11, as an unexpected help to the family. The love triangle between Zoey, Max and Simon continues to evolve, in unexpected ways. And we have one number, at the end of Episode 12, that’s a six and a half or seven minute long one-take oner that is the thing I’m probably most proud of, all season.”- Austin

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“There is one number in which I sing one verse and that’s it after this. [read: after ep 1x08, where Zoey sings all the songs]” - Jane

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"You will see her go down both roads and there are some fun intimate numbers, musical numbers between Zoey and Simon. And there’s some between Zoey and Max as well. I really like how Austin has crafted this “love triangle.” Can’t give away much more than that.” - Jane

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IN SHORT:

More people are gonna find out about the power...MAYBE in S1...maybe...LATER ;)

The next/last weeks of Zoey’s dad’s life, and all that goes with it

Max/Zoey finale moments...and moments leading to that... (but also Z/S scenes...)

SOURCES:

2: The Futon Critic

2: IMDB

3: E! Online - ‘ZEP’ Finally Puts Jane Levy In the Musical Hot Seat

4: Variety - Jane Levy on ‘Panic’ & Jim Carrey as Inspiration for Special ‘ZEP’ Episode

5. ET - Skylar Astin Dishes on the Magic of 'ZEP' and a Realistic Love Triangle

6. EW - Jane Levy on filming 'most raw, vulnerable, honest' ZEP episode yet

7. Collider - ‘ZEP’ Showrunner Previews Zoey-Centric Episode

8. The Playlist - Jane Levy discusses the difficulty of ainging 6 different songs in 1 ‘ZEP’ episode

9. TV Line: Matts Inside Line - TV scoop [April 17th]

10. TV Line: As Ausiello - 4 Bonus Scoops [May 1st]

11. TV Line: ‘ZEP’ EP Previews Emotional Finale, Surprising Love Triangle Twists [May 1st]

12. Extra TV: Jane Levy & Skylar Astin Tease ‘ZEP’ S1 Finale [May 1st] VIDEO

ALSO: The previous epsiodes, and some things in episode 1x11 (some lines/scenes), and some things in 1x12 promo reveal quite a bit. Same goes to inetrviews (written articles, video “interviews” with cast. They have actually revealed quite a bit...if you paid attention. Or...if you didn’t, then after watching the finale, as you look back... you might realize they showed/told you quite a bit already... though I think it won’t be as big of a surprise... (applies to some things in the finale)

#SPOILER #ZEPspoilers #ZEP SPOILER #ZEP #ZOEYS EXTRAORDINARY PLAYLIST #ZOEY'S EXTRAORDINARY PLAYLIST #Zoey Clarke #Max Richman #Clarkeman #Zax #Zoey x Max #Max x Zoey #Team Max #Zomax

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