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#i dunno it feels uncomfortable
pirateofrohan · 1 month
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remember in da2 when marethari went into the alienage and everybody bowed? that was weird, right?
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hotluncheddie · 1 year
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having autistic high masking steve thoughts..
steve harrington who’s black and white is these are the rules and you follow them. you turn up at school, you show your face at dinner, you do your hair and brush your teeth and speak when your spoken to. steve harrington who doesn’t want to be alone at lunch, knows that making friends in important because it’s the only thing his mother asked him after his first day, and he wants to be able to say ‘yes’ if she ever asks again. steve who loves to swim but hates how the shower water beats on his skin after, how the shampoo always get all over his face and he’s never given time to wipe it off in the right way, can’t seem to say how it makes him want to scream. all he knows he can’t scream because that’s ‘bad behaviour steven’ and then he won’t be able to swim. so he swallows it, he detaches, he only half exists in the shower and he feels a mass of dark smoke churn in his chest.
steve harrington who heard what the other kids said, how they spoke about the older kids, how people spoke on the tv. learned that when he grew up that he’d need to talk to girls like he wanted to date them, kiss them. talk to guys like he enjoyed hearing about their weekends, even if they were mean and annoying. even is he didn’t care and noticed how they never asked about him. but you’re not allowed to say that; your annoying, i don’t care, you make me feel bad. you have to listen and smile and fit in and be liked. not matter what.
steve harrington who’s smart and sensible and is good at recognising patterns. who knows how to survive, no matter how uncomfortable he is. no matter how tired he is by the evening, mind blasting static, no room do anything other than lay there. he doesn’t really know what he likes because he has no energy to do anything, anything other than going to school and go on dates. he got good at hiding how reading takes so long and writing never comes out in the right order first time. how so often he feels like his skin needs to just come off. how that scream is still sitting at the base of his throat.
he dreams of running away, to hide and just, be quiet. everything just need to be quiet and dark, for a little bit. for a while. but it can’t be, because he has to show his face, has to do his hair.
and then monsters exist. and steve survives, because he has to, because he can. he knows his role in the story, so he fights and he cares and he protects and he keeps talking to girls and he keeps brushing his teeth and when he gets beaten up it hurts, it’s uncomfortable, but what’s more discomfort when every day is uncomfortable. he’s always been uncomfortable but how can he ever not be, he has to follow the rules.
hurt/comfort pt2 & snippet pt3
ao3
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bixels · 4 months
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What did/do you like about Pharah?
Uh, gameplay-wise, I really love characters in shooters who rely on three-dimensional movement techs. Chaining together hover and jump to stay in the air for as long as possible and keep momentum is so satisfying, and picking enemies off from the sky made me feel like a bird of prey. I was a good Pharah main.
Story-wise, there unfortunately isn't much to canonically go off because Pharah is so underutilized and neglected. Her personality's pretty boilerplate "heroic hero" (she's literally inspired by Captain America).
But it's the crumbs/bits and pieces that I really latched onto. Pharah's a confirmed lesbian; her short story with Baptiste implies she harbors a crush on Mercy (fucking thank you.). She's biracial Egyptian/First Nations. She has major mommy issues, having grown up both admiring and resenting Ana. She's the bridge between Old Overwatch, inspired by the idealized heroes who surrounded her childhood, and New Overwatch. She's one of the only inter-generational characters in the cast; someone whose experiences span the gap, which is why I seriously believe Pharah would make a great main character.
There isn't much to go off of, though; she's a very uncomplicated character (she's a soldier for a private military corporation, lol.). But that just means she's a blank slate character, so I've seen fanfic writers run wild and create some really interesting takes on her. My favorite interpretation of her's a dense, herbo gym-bro type (a lot of her liens are about work outs, exercising, and playing sports) who's easily excitable under her seemingly self-serious, armored visage. We see how she tends to gloat and hype herself up when she's on a streak too, so Pharah definitely has a competitive and boastful side under her more professional and militant performance.
Now Mercy? Mercy is a real complex character.
#i was a diehard pharmercy shipper back then btw#the inherent homoerotic experience of pharmercy gameplay.#the homoerotic experience of looking to the skies to fly to safety under the protection of your knight in shining armor#the homoerotic experience of feeling white hot murderous rage at an enemy trying to pick off your pocket mercy#i still kinda despise gency lmao. you cannot convince me mercy would be in love with genji. at all.#he'd make her feel so uncomfortable and guilty. in my head. the canon is obviously different#gency is sexless. absolutely zero bite or tension.#i could go on about mercy and how her character has so much missed potential#i'm no longer in my overwatch fandom phase but#i still think about that new flirty line they added in ow2 where mercy goes “ahh you're like my knight in shining armor!”#and pharah goes “that's what i'm goin for ;)” and i sigh dreamily#really happy that pharah outright says she's a lesbian too but it's hard to feel good about rep when you know blizzard uses it for pr#to be honest i'm willing to bet cash that blizzard's keeping pharmercy in their back pocket as ammo for the next controversy#last year we already saw logs about pharah fretting and taking care of mercy and the two talking about how good it is to see each other#tbh pharah has the same energy/demeanor as applejack. cheerful and competitive in a can of whoopass#but yeah overall pharah's a pretty shallow character. i have IDEAS on how i'd go about deepening her but. whatever#that's sorta what happens when you have to juggle a cast of 40 characters. a lot get left with the bare minimum#ok so i wrote this entire post up saying that pharah isn't in ow2's storymode when she is. she's in the story i just. forgot#because she doesn't do or contribute anything interesting#ok i'm stopping here. overwatch's story is such an interesting narrative mess i could go on for hours#i dunno how you come up with such incredible character designs and give them such an unincredible story#it's also so so so interesting seeing the conflicting takes on characters the writers have#mercy in gameplay and voicelines is peppy and cheerful and optimistic#but mercy in the storymode journal logs is tired. jaded. a total shut in who forgets to leave her room and social#and YES! THAT'S WHAT I WANT!!! THAT'S MERCY TO ME!!! THE DOCTOR WHO FORGETS TO TAKE CARE OF HERSELF#ask me#anon
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dustykneed · 29 days
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(tsfs feels anyone? fanart below.)
You've been in his head.
But he says, never faltering, the words,
"I choose the danger."
It is in that moment that you understand:
He could never, would never,
Has never hated you.
Now you realize:
this is what humans refer to as love.
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applefoam · 3 months
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as someone with a psychotic disorder, I really dislike "spiritual psychosis" being tossed around as a buzzword
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silverskye13 · 7 months
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hi can i just say that while I haven't been there to read your HK fanfiction, seeing you update nailmaster's folly after so long makes me... hopeful? In the 'I also have wips I haven't touched in years but there might still be space for them one day if I get the gumption' sort of way? so, while I'm not really going to be reading it as I know nothing about HK: thanks for updating nailmaster's folly, so cool to see it.
Hey you're very welcome! I'm very stoked it's giving you hope for your future projects. That's a hope you deserve to have.
Honestly, one of the most important things about art that I wish everyone would, at some point, absorb into their creative process, is that everything is allowed to rest. Sometimes the only thing that will "fix" a problem piece is time and distance, and that time and distance is allowed to be long. You're allowed to drop something for 4 years and randomly decide it's worth your time again, and you should be able to have that process without guilt or judgement.
Not to get on the "internet culture is evil" soapbox, but, the idea of the "grind", that every project must be done at once, from start to finish, in a logical order that others can consume and follow from point A to point Z, is untenable for individual creators, especially creators that are doing it just for fun. You aren't a machine. You aren't a writing board churning out a podcast, movie, tv series, comic book set, etc. You're a person finding joy in making art about something you love. The process can be messy. It can make no sense. It can involve long breaks, or deciding you're done with something entirely. Without guilt or malice, you are allowed to wash your hands of something and then decide to get them dirty with it again when you can stand the texture.
I understand there's sadness in thinking you can't finish something, in not knowing how to fix it immediately, or not being able to conjure the motivation to put to physicality something that makes so much sense in your head. Be disappointed, and grieve it, if you must. But never think it was time wasted. No one has ever walked out of their house in the morning without, at some point or another, looking at the world to see what was there. You're allowed to start a project, walk down the road with it, and realize you'd rather look around.
You can always come back.
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borifem · 2 months
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WIP
hi, I'm bori, I'm gonna turn this into a proper intro when I have time but in short! i'm a 21yo girl, I have noticed my views started to shift, and I made this account to explore the ideas of radical feminism, open up a dialog and seek out the opinions and guidance of other women. so far, I've always been in very q*eer circles both irl and on line. a huge portion of my irl friends and close ones are trans/q*eer - this change of views is truly a huge deal to me. i feel as I am betraying those I love, but the internal conflict is gnawing at me, thus driving me to make this account. I hope it'll bring me peace; a conclusion.
besides that: im bi, a slav, vegan, i love nature, birds, reading, some fandoms I dabble in, being silly, kindness in the face of struggle and so on and so forth. i am mentally ill, and a SA victim, but I'm not disclosing more than that for now. toxic yuri can save the world. bye! :)
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sysig · 1 year
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Blusters in, flusters out (Patreon)
#Doodles#Wander Over Yonder#Emperor Awesome#Commander Peepers#Yet again some light Eyesome - at Least on the friendship side of things <3#Drawing Awesome's big smile-laugh was so fun ahh ♥ His mouth and teeth shape with his gums showing! The fact both eyes are hidden!#His hand grabbing his chest lol ♪ I was thinking the way Chris Evans laughs haha#And then pulling a ''Cute'' on Peeps hehe <3 He's said that before when he's being mean! (Though I like to think he also meant it lol)#He probably thinks cute is lame :P But cute is cute! Girls can be cute Peepers can be cute dolls can be cute! Cute runs the gamut!#I am so pleased with the little blush hashmarks where Awesome pinched him haha ♪ He is So pissed#It seems like Watchdog eyes can be touched - lightly - or at least they can choose to touch things with their eyes open#Biting/licking tends to be a closed-eye activity but Peepers has been seen drinking with his eye open! It's interesting#I think it'd probably be uncomfortable but not painful - I dunno whether to think of Watchdog eyes as being more or less moist haha#If they're more then they'd have a thicker mucus membrane to protect them - almost like frog skin?#But if it's less then it's almost more like plain skin itself - self-hydrating but thicker#I guess it comes down to what parts of the eye are actually ''eye'' lol - maybe just the iris? Though veins are visible in the sclera!#And they do clearly have eyelids and the ability to blink so they need flexible smooth-moving opaque skin on top :0 Not like a shell haha#Their helmets - Peepers' especially - act more like a shell which is very cute :) I love Peepers' ridiculous ''widows peak'' haha <3#Feel free to imagine the rest of Awesome as him leaning as far back as possible as he walks away lol#Kicking myself quietly for going with ''Napoleon'' rather than ''Bonaparte'' I think it would've flowed better and been a bit more clever#How does he know who Napoleon Bonaparte is and what he's referring to? Counterpoint what the hell is ''Bon Appétit'' - Wander & Peepers#Lol#Gone as quick as he came#He'll be back in no time to bother him again haha
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vole-mon-amour · 4 months
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"If you could just do me a favor and off yourself, that'd be great. Thanks, pumpkin."
Man, I'm still so in love with you. Dameon's voice is always a treat to hear as Jack. <3
Oh, and it's an IMMEDIATE "Stfu, Claptrap." Still fucking hate him, let me kill the annoying asshole.
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gumheel · 5 months
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i do like bg3 i do love getting to play out my 5e fantasies in a single player rpg and i think it's pretty polished for how huge it is but i cannot empathize with people treating the mains tory or the companions as masterworks of storytelling. the main story i can give a pass for needing to be massive to accommodate the size of the game and i do genuinely think the main three villains there are fun and i like them but for a game that identifies one of its draws as the unique companions and quests it is like... heartwrenching to see just from the volume of content which characters they liked and which they didn't care about
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eebie · 5 months
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my last post got me thinking so im gonna do a poll to see what u guys think
id love to do a second poll like this on twitter and compare the results. they’d probably be very different from what i’m predicting the response to be here But also twitter is a notorious hellscape and im not setting foot in there. also theres a typo in that last option we isn’t supposed to be there.
EDIT: some clarification bc my wording may have been a little confusing: if two characters are not related in canon, but their voice actors are related in real life, would it be weird to ship the characters?
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jiangshinigami · 24 days
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i am feeling REALLY UPSET and EASILY FRUSTRATED right now if somebody talks to me in the WRONG WAY i am going to DISEMBOWEL THEM
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raycatz · 7 months
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I DID MY CAMP INTERVIEW AND IT WENT WELL AND I HAVE A JOB THIS SUMMER YEEEAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!
now to crumple on the floor and hhhhhhh destress, breathe? aha...
o|<
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blujayonthewing · 10 months
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extremely important to me that my satyr is completely sweet and naive and gentle and innocent and is still a satyr who loves to drink and do drugs and have as much sex as possible, likewise extremely important to me that my goofy little kooky mad scientist archetype wizard with a silly voice and funny eccentricities is also unironically beautiful and desirable and capable of sincere attraction and love, extremely and equally important to me for different reasons that are the same reason
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isdalinarhot · 3 months
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for the 3 minutes and 42 seconds Shots (shots shots shots etc) by LMFAO is playing I am stopping being all Catholic and self loath y and guilty and shameful and starting being glorifying addiction or w/e. everyone get wasted every night NOW. Dalinar says this
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