#i dont want him to be part of the family for his own health

[dana-chan-the-control-brain]

Tsams canon stop calling Nexus straight up "Insane" "crazy" or a "Lunatic" every time he's mentioned challenge.

Look, I'm not blind to his issues. He's threatened children (robotic) and called his sister collateral.

But for characters to repeatedly say "he was always insane." Even from characters who don't know him that well, or probably only interacted with him once or twice like Gemini.... I don't know.

It's like everyone is buying Nexus's hype. As if he's not deliberately pushing others away. As if he didn't miss Solar so much he lobotomized himself over it and fell into a drug dark star power addiction because of it.

As if Nexus didn't want to "show Solar the new me" as if he was hoping that Solar would accept him and come with him even if he was off his rocker.

I can't look at the entire past year of N!Moon's life and say that "oh yeah, New Moon was always toxic"

He wasn't. And I can guarantee N!Moon having a villian arc wasn't something planned from the start with them.

Enjoy the entire Year of Nexus/N!Moon being alive and a good brother.

I see someone who cared so much and had to pretend to be something he wasn't and cracked under the pressure. Nexus even says if he has no one to care about he has no one to lose. He cared and lost so much and he just didn't want to care or be told what to do anymore he broke.

Something bad will happen to Nexus. And I feel it will end like every addiction story ends.

[the-faceless-bride]

More Ideas for KNY (demon slayer) different characters ♡ (SOME NSFW CONTENT FOR SANEMI AND MUZAN AND MENTIONS OF GORE IN SANEMI AND LIGHT NSFW IN GYOMEI)

<- Part 1

Imagine being dangerously in love.

Imagine being a demon, obsessed with the brash, and blood thirst Wind Hashira. the first time ever being in battle with him is what leads you down a path of want and lust for the cruel hashira.

Imagine going out of your way to always be where he is, always catching his attention and being attacked by him. He believes you're mocking him, following him just to show off that he hasn't been able to kill you. But that isn't true at all. When you fight, you never actively try and gut him, only blocking your neck and leaving the rest of your limbs exposed to be lashed in this masochism tango.

Imagine struggling to hide your enjoyment and ecstacy each time his sword ripped, teard, and scar your body. He had to have known how me made you feel. He must. The darkness of your cheeks must've been a giveaway. Right? His eyes bewitching you in how intense he glares into your soul. It sets a fire under your cold skin, a burning desire.

Imagine one time when you and Sanemi are fighting. Other slayers show up. But they don't instantly jump into the fight. 1. from looking at the fight, you hadn't landed a single strike and seemed to be a greater deal slower than the hashira, and 2. Tanjiro made an odd comment. "Huh, it's like she's avoiding striking him on purpose."

Imagine how Shinobu decided the fight was long enough and tried to sneak in and end the fight. Only for a switch to set off and catch her off guard and spin at the speed of light, leaving a large gash across her body from her left founder to her hip. And Sanemi instantly tried to help her. Only to be stopped by your own weapon pressed so close to his neck that even swallowing made his Adamsapple scrape against a sharp blade. "Don't you dare. Your attention is meant for me. Are you seriously letting her attempt to get between us work?" And that made Sanemi pause... "us? Wha-" -- "don't play dumb darling. We're soulmates, Sanemi~" you whisper to him. "What the fuck."

Imagine how now you make him feel so conflicted, how he hates you for what you are but loves you for how you make him feel... in his home in his spare time as the sun rises, his windows covered and locked tight as he has you on your knees, leaning forward and his chest pressed to your back. Your head locked between his bicep as his other hand held his sword under you. It nicks you each time he thrusts. If he pushed you forward anymore, his blade would surely cut your chest and stomach open. "I HATE YOU, YOU FILTHY DEMON. I DONT WANT YOU. CURSE YOU FOR DEMONIC TEMPTATION." You softy cry at the harsh words from your love, "I don't care if you don't want me... I'm yours right now..."

Sanemi Shinazugawa × Demon reader Trope: Yandere Lovesick/I hate you so much I love you.

Imagine being with Muzan his entire life... your family were servants to his family. And from a young age, you were assigned to be Muzans personal maid or companion as you were too young to really do any work than cleaning up his room. But since you can remember, you've always been with Muzan.

Imagine being the one he confides with most. His fears, his wishes, and despite his coldness. His shouldering eyes seemed to be less scorching when it came to you. His one and only friend. Even if you didn't have much of a choice in the companionship. It was you who sat in on his doctor's visits about his deteriorating health. When he got the news of how it would be a miracle for him to even make it to his mid 20s...

Imagine how one night after a particularly scary coughing fit, he simply places his head to your mid section as you blush his hair and pull it back into a braid. He softy thanks you as he tilts his head to look up at you, "Of course, I'm always happy to take care of you." But that isn't want he wants. He wanted to take care of you. Not you to him. And without thinking, he pulls you down to him.

Imagine His heat is pounding in his chest. You lay across him as his long and slim fingers tease you between your legs. You try and stay quiet, your face twisted with pleasure and guilt. You felt like you were taking advantage of the sick man who would never find love or feel the love of another in such a romantic and intimate way. You thought maybe that this was him just grasping for a moment where he didn't feel so useless being bedridden. But it was so much more. If this was the last thing he did, pleasing the only one who he cared for most. The one he wished he could've married... he would be happy to die. This surely isn't good for his heart, but he couldn't care less. You hovering yourself above him. As he tried weakly to pull you in to rest your whole weight. This was how he wanted to spend his last days, weeks, and months. However long he had left. He wanted it to be with you.

Imagine as days go by, and he feels more and more guilty. He starts to feel as though you let him do these things because you feel obligated as his personal maid to do so. Nights in the dark ask he fingers you, giving and receiving oral pleasure. But you still won't give him everything. You refuse to fully lay with him. Sometimes, he feels like it's because you don't really love him. Not like he does you. Or maybe you find him... pathetic... he can't actually make love to you. You'd be doing all the work. He doesn't want that, and it seems you don't either... eventually, his thoughts become too much, and he decides to let you go...

Imagine you were relieved of all your maid duties, not just to Muzan but to the family as a whole. You were heartbroken. And the heartbreak only worsened at the news of Muzan and his families and your families deaths. You'd cried more times than you'd ever had before in your life. And you were so very confused when you'd found a Man who looked exactly like Muzan sitting in your bed a few nights later. "Hello dear. I'm home." He invented to truly give you what you wanted, and he was eager to give it too you.

Muzan Kibutsuji × reader Trope: Unrequited/reunited love/soulmates

Imagine being Master Kagaya's faithful slayer, you'd always admired him. You and your Master had created a strong bond. Stronger than others. Moments like this reminded you that you were special. You sat on your knees as you just like you had the first time. Your head pressed to his chest and he dragged his fingers over your head.

Imagine trying not to tear up as you remember the first time you'd kneeled for him. You'd been reckless and impatient leading to a fellow slayer getting extremely hurt. You kneeled before him as you sat in the room alone waiting for him to speak. Doing your best to not make any noise as you silently cry. You'd failed him. Your beloved Master. But he didn't yell. He didn't make you feel like you were a problem. He merely hummed before knealing with you, one hand on atop your head and the other cupping your cheek feeling the wet stream of tears and wiped it away. "It's alright. You didn't mean for this to happen. I know you didn't. I know you're a good girl." And your breath hitched. He noticed. And from then on he gave you positive affrimations which encouraged you to do better. For him.

Imagine how as you sat there listening to his words letting yourself flow away and melt into your master. He thought it was innocent. He was simply your master helping you, if it wasn't him maybe you'd find these soft words from Gyomei or maybe even Kyojuro... but he was wrong. So wrong. It was him. Only him. You'd put yourself on the line so much more than you should've. All to hear those soft praises. His wife must not like you... you do take up more and more of his time as days go on...

Imagine how he softly calls to you. Late that night, he'd heard your footsteps. He sat with you talking. About anything that day. Soft and short conversations. Quiet but not uncomfortable. "You're my favorite you know." He sighed, before he let out a small chuckle "don't tell the others." You know he was teasing. But your heart told you other wise.

Imagine being hurt. In battle you were hurt. But even in your pain you still made your way to your master... your beautiful Kagaya... the married man, the family man, that you had fallen in love with. "My dear, you still come and see me while you're in such pain?" He seemed shocked. But you aren't sure why, you'd walk on hot coles and crawled on your hands and belly to kneel for him. You'd do anything for your master. And you could only hope as his favorite... you wouldn't let him down. Finally you lifted your head from his chest, pulling his hands from your hands, leaving a kiss to his knuckles. One day. One day you'll have him.

Kagaya Ubuyashiki × Slayer reader Trope: unrequited love/lovesick/slow burn

Special Part two of Forbidden love with Gyomei × demon

Imagine how the rest of the slayers flock around Gyomei, asking him so many questions. And he couldn't even answer them all. Too consumed by his disbelief that the person he'd fallen in love with so deeply, had turned out to be a demon.

Imagine how he layed in bed lonely and... missing you. He began to long of your cold touch, your voice, your laugh that was so contagious to him. He missed you. He'd fallen for you. Demon or not. He laid in his bed trying and failing to get even a wink of sleep. But just as he had almost fallen asleep he was awoken by a sound. 'Tap tap' was the sound, 'tap tap' on his window. "Gyomei... my love..."

Imagine how he practically leaped from his bed. Demon or not you had carved yourself a spot in his heart. Slamming open the window and pulling you inside, his hands instantly feeling over your cheeks, your nose, your neck. Kissing the knuckles of your cold hands.

Imagine being the one that made Gyomei for a moment stay from his faiths. Gyomei devoted his life to his beliefs, that includes waiting. Waited all his life for the one. Saving himself and waiting. But you both were in a unique circumstances... so from that point on Gyomei promised himself to you. You would stay with him in his home and he would always come back to you. That night he would kiss you, love you, lay you under him while he whispered for you to be his.

[belladonnafeli]

The Romanticism of ASOIAF

The idea that ASOIAF is "nihilistic" and that the message should be that nothing matters and the world is terrible, therefore caring and being kind is pointless is a fundamental misunderstanding of the story. George himself says that his favorite characters are the heroes “My own heroes are the dreamers, those men and women who tried to make the world a better place than when they found it, whether in small ways or great ones. Some succeeded, some failed, most had mixed results… but it is the effort that’s heroic, as I see it. ” The romance of the story. Chivalry, courtesy, courage, being good in spite of evil. Being good because of evil. These are the fundamentals of A Song of Ice and Fire. “We’re here for a short time and we should be conscious of our own mortality, but the important thing is that love, compassion and empathy with other human beings is still possible! Even laughter in the face of death…The struggle to make the world a better place…We have things like war, murder, rape…Horrible things that still exist, but we dont have to accept them, we can fight the good fight.”GRRM, Ideas At The House

Some examples of this are exemplified by characters such as Brienne. Briennes’ belief in doing good regardless of whether or not she benefits from it is inspiring. No chance, No choice is obviously extremely heroic. “Willow stepped out into the rain, a crossbow in her hands. The girl was shouting at the riders, but a clap of thunder rolled across the yard, drowning out her words. As it faded, Brienne heard the man in the Hound's helm say, "Loose a quarrel at me and I'll shove that crossbow up your cunt and fuck you with it. Then I'll pop your fucking eyes out and make you eat them." The fury in the man's voice drove Willow back a step, trembling. Seven, Brienne thought again, despairing. She had no chance against seven, she knew. No chance, and no choice. She stepped out into the rain, Oathkeeper in hand. "Leave her be. If you want to rape someone, try me." AFFC Chapter 37 This is exactly the kind of chivalry George is in love with. Her chivalry, courtesy and courage inspire someone like Jaime, a man who has lost his way due to his family, his own carelessness and his mental health. Now this isn't to make it seem like Jaime is a man with zero faults. As evidenced by him pushing Bran out of a window. But focusing only on Jamies worst moment does a disservice to his greatest act, the one act he is reviled for. Killing mad king Aerys. He is the one who hears Rhaellas cries. The cries that continue to haunt him, well past her death.

Now personally I want to talk about the moments that provide Compassion, Empathy, and Courage. Courage- Theon, specifically Theon in regards to Jeyne Poole. Theon has done terrible things and I am not trying to absolve him of any of those things. If I did he would be a significantly less interesting character and his next act which I'm about to bring up wouldn't be as powerful. There is something to be said about the Theon/Jeyne plotline that really touches me. Everyone in the North wants to save “Ned’s girl”. Everyone wants to save Arya Stark. But part of why they want to save her is because of who she is attached to in terms of her father and what Arya's status is in society as a highborn lady. Theon is the only person who knows that “Arya” isn’t actually Arya, but Jeyne Poole. And I feel as though there's something to be said here. There are probably hundreds if not thousands of women and girls who go through what Jeyne is going through, but how many of them are going to actually be saved? How many of them will be remembered? How many of them will be forgotten? To me there is something very heartwarming that the one person who knows who Jeyne really is, is the person saving her.

He’s not saving her because she’s Ned Stark's daughter, or because she’s some high lord's daughter. He’s saving her because even though he's been traumatized beyond belief and he’s terrified, he knows that it is the right thing to do. And with what he’s been through, when it comes to Ramsey, what he does is so very courageous. And it inspires that hope and heroism that George RR Martin is writing about.

Next a moment that is extremely popular and also iconic is when Daenerys decides to free the slaves of Astapor. Something that isn't brought up very often I feel is that when Daenerys does this she’s nervous. Her heart is pounding. And it takes me back to the beginning of the story with Ned and Bran. When Bran asks if someone who is afraid can be brave? And Ned says the iconic response that we all know. “That is the only time a man can be brave” There are a plethora of moments of chivalry, honor and courage. When Brienne follows Lady Catelyn because she has “woman's kind of courage” it hit me because a lot of stories, especially ones where a mother is a character in a medieval setting, tend to fall into one of two categories. Pure, saintly, and all good or evil, terrible nasty stepmother trope. Essentially the madonna/whore complex, but Brienne recognizes the courage and strength in a woman like Catelyn in this society which doesn't value the strength of women. In a story where Brienne says “Women die in childbirth and no one sings songs about them.” She sees Catelyns strength and I think that’s beautiful.

sorry for the ranting 😭

[beseeingyouinmydreams]

If I see one more person say Kate & Maya have no blame in this I might scream.

He went to rehab and got out last year sober. She continued to drink around him, go party (spend his money and seek attn every chance she got) tell me how a recovering addict fresh out of rehab is going to resist temptation when the gf is CONSTANTLY DRINKING.

I’m sorry but your partner who you love sooooo much is fresh out of rehab has severe addiction issues tried AGAIN to do rehab( sadly at that point I think he was so far gone, he checked out after two days) and she STILLLLLLL didn’t change up behaviour. Still kept alcohol around still stayed with him, before he got REALLY bad. Then left him in a foreign country with Fckn Roger who clearly had no issues with Liams addictions until he abandoned him drug induced in a (shady)hotel room without alerting authorities. But she left him there knowing the label and management had recently dropped him knowing he clearly was still not ok. I DONT CARE that he was a grown man and made his own decisions. He clearly wasn’t capable of that.

Maya has every hand in this damn situation. She threw the man off a cliff into a pack of fckn rabid wolves ( the Internet) when she reopened the publicity and hate train over her dumb ass book. Nothing anyone says will change my mind on her part in this. Man had lost management and label and she dragged up publicity over a book that had died. Shr wanted him to leave her alone THE MAN WAS SCREAMING FOR HELP. & she couldn’t keep his name out of her mouth. She wanted attn. she had her space to talk about her issues. She did that when it dropped then brought it all back up and brought One D into the mix…. After knowing what one d fans and the internet had done to Liam after fully knowing his mental health and addictions while knowing he wasn’t ok. Girlie straight pushed every button she needed. And when we go back further she’s no better than Kate in terms of alcohol and drugs. Enabled him constantly drinking with and around him, constantly needing to party and get attn. and I’ve seen more than a few times she’s had drug problems as well. But she’s so innocent.

I am utterly sick of people saying he did this himself he chose his actions. NO his past and traumas and the issues and actions of those around him for the last few years did this. He wouldn’t have been in that state had the above not been an issue. Had the people in his every day immediate life for the last so many years been better fckn people and actually cared. His problems didn’t start the day he passed. He in truth had been LONG gone for quite a few months. The fact he was able to get that far gone that soon after rehab, last year is so messed up. He wasn’t alone in this he had “supportive” people every day Roger and Kate his team …. He came out of rehab clean and wanting a fresh start. The people in his life FAILED HIM. His family knowing and trying to help they didn’t live with him to see his every day. They knew and tried to help but when those in youre daily life are failing and enabling you and he was as gone as he’d been for months……

This was all preventable in every single way. I’ll never stop saying it. It was utterly senseless. I’m so angry more than any other emotion. And as heart broken as I am. In some way I’m glad he’s gone. I don’t know that things could’ve gotten any worse than what’s come out but I do know at least now the leeches and fame sucking people he had around him daily can all go to hell and can’t abuse and use him. No one can hurt him anymore. Man’s at peace and that’s more than they’ll ever be.

[mac-n-chees]

man i fucking hate enji todoroki

when i say that i hate endeavor i dont mean i think he’s icky and i dont like him. i mean i dont think he deserved the forgiveness he got im so sorry. for context let’s back things up. the entire todoroki family lore is SO FUCKED UP. the whole “convenience marriage” thing? WHACK. sa-ing rei until she gave him the child he wanted? WHACK. and we don’t talk about that enough! it was rape! he didn’t care about her at all, he just wanted the perfect weapon to beat all might! and then touya’s whole deal? the fact that he was literally self destructing bc he thought he wasn’t good enough? and endeavor never made him feel good enough? he had all the right to become a villain.

and then, shoto. literally alienated him from his siblings so none of them know a single thing about him and vice versa. weaponizing him since he was a TODDLER. and saying he was “tough on him” is a SEVERE understatement, that little boy was thoroughly abused.

and then the aftermath of the whole thing with rei. he traumatized her so bad it led her to BURN HER OWN SON’S FACE. and what did he do instead of reevaluate his behavior? LOCK HER UP IN A MENTAL INSTITUTION. and not because he cared for her health, but because he didn’t want her to hurt shoto again. messed. the fuck. up.

and if yall gonna come in here and say “oh but other characters have been forgiven after their redemption arcs like zuko and regina mills” DONT YOU EVER COME IN HERE WITH THAT SHIT. their entire redemption arc revolved around them making a wrong choice that further proved to them that being good was the right way. they felt severe unease, and like it wasn’t “them”, so to speak, at being inherently “evil” so they CHOSE to convert because being “evil” was not their true selves. they made MISTAKES but learned from those mistakes BY THEMSELVES without anyone else influencing their thoughts or telling them anything. they CHOSE good because the people they cared about were good, and they wanted to be with them. they made a bad choice, yes, but the whole point of the redemption arc was that they learned from it and improved their characters. endeavor did not make a bad choice, he abused actual, living people for many, many, MANY years. it wasn’t a “bad choice” it was a deliberate decision to fulfill his stupid fucking delusions of grandeur.

how are those antiheroes different from endeavor you ask? I WILL TELL YOU. sure, he got a redemption arc, and sure he got forgiven. but did yall notice he only did an effort to do better after he became the number 1 hero? after shoto was in UA and his children were grown? after rei was locked up so she couldn’t tell anyone about what happened? after all might was no longer the symbol of peace? he only made the effort to become a better person once his OWN PERSONAL GOALS were fulfilled. he always prioritized himself. he didn’t learn shit. he’s not sorry for shit. he regrets nothing. he just wants to be perceived as the perfect #1 hero like all might was.

be fucking for real, his redemption arc was NONEXISTENT, and his children should not forgive him no matter how hard he begs. he does not deserve forgiveness. he’s a fucking abuser, rapist, and all around ASSHOLE.

if he has no haters im dead. and if i see even one endeavor ass kisser in the comments, you’re getting blocked idgaf. the fact that you think he’s hot and just because of that he earned his forgiveness will not fly here hoes idc. that man deserves to rot in hell for all he’s done, if he wasn’t (and i cannot stress the “quote unquote” part enough) “attractive” yall would be on the other side. i can’t anymore, endeavor stans gtfo.

[gmuffinhead]

Heres a Demon Slayer modern Au I came up with cuz I can.

Warnings, mentions of r*pe, domestic abuse and character death. Only short mentions of it, tho!

They are all college students, a level students. Cuz I'm British and i dont understand America.

College students:

Giyuu - 18 - A level computer science, A level physics, A level chemistry.

Sanemi - 18 - A level maths, A level physics, A level biology.

Shinobu - 17 - A level health and social, A level chemistry, A level biology.

Obanai - 18 - A level English Lit, A level English language, A level physics.

Mitsuri - 17 - Art level 3 btec.

Kyojuro - 17 - A level history, A level geography, A level business.

Tengen - 18 - A level preforming arts, A level art, A level music.

Gyomei - 18 - A level religious studies, A level Sociology, A level Psychology.

High-school students:

Zenitsu - 16 - Year 11.

Genya - 16 - Year 11.

Aoi - 16 - Year 11.

Tanjiro - 15 - Year 10.

Inosuke - 15 - Year 10.

Kanao - 15 - Year 10.

Muichiro - 14 - Year 9.

Nezuko - 14 - Year 9.

Senjuro - 14 - Year 9.

Facts:

Giyuu babysits Muichiro because Tsutako was Muichiro's nurse when he was in the hospital.

Kanae is a therapist. Tsutako is a nurse.

The Kamado family's bakery is right next to the Tomioka household.

Obanai and Shinobu live in the same apartment building.

Kanae and Tsutako are dating. They met at the hospital Tsutako works at.

Kanae is Inosuke's mum's therapist.

Shinobu has babysat Inosuke on multiple occasions before.

Tanjiro and Kanao are dating.

Mitsuri and Obanai are dating, and Obanai sometimes stays around hers during holidays.

Aoi has a crush on Tanjiro.

Zenitsu doesn't hold any romantic feelings for Nezuko.

Shinobu and Giyuu are very close.

Rengoku's family used to babysit Mitsuri and her siblings, but ever since Kyojuros mum died the families haven't interacted outside of Kyojuro and Mitsuri.

Mitsuri can't drive so Obanai drives her around.

Family:

Giyuu lives with his sister since their parents died when he was younge due to an illness.

Sanemi and Genya live with all their siblings and their mum. Their dad is in prison for domestic violence.

Shinobu lives in her older sisters apartment since their parents passed away when she was only 12.

Obanai lives with Kyojuro in the same apartment building as Shinobu. He was born and raised in a cult that he fortunately escaped from, and was adopted by the Rengoku's.

Mitsuri lives happily with her parents.

Kyojuro lives with Obanai, he used to live with his acholic dad and younger brother but left because his dad was getting worse. His younger brother stays with him during the weekends.

Tengen has an apartment with his three girlfriends. He doesn't want to live at home since his family is a military family and don't agree with his educational choices. His girlfriends also come from a military past. But all four of them have put it past them now to live normally.

Gyomei lives on his own, but does babysitting after school and on the weekends. He babysits Sanemi's siblings often.

Muichiro lives with his parents. Unfortunately when he was 10 him and

Yuichiro got into a terrible car accident. Where in the heat of the moment Yuichiro leapt across his seat to shield his brother. Muichiro got a serious head injury and can't remember anything.

Tanjiro and Nezuko live with their family and own a bakery.

Zenitsu lives with his granfather and his adoptive brother. Although they don't get along well.

Kanao was recently adopted by Kanae and Shinobu. She was trafficked and abused by many people before ending up in an orphanage, however the orphanage didn't know how to deal with her trauma so they contacted a known therapist, Kanae, who decided to adopt Kanao.

Aoi lives in the orphanage Kanao was sent to. She works part-time for Kanae.

Inosuke lives with his mother. His father (not douma) is in prison for r*pe of a minor (Inosukes mum). Inosukes mum gave birth to Inosuke when she was only 17. (WHICH IS LIKE CANNON??)

Other facts about school.

Shinobu, Giyuu, Mitsuri, Obanai, Rengoku and Sanemi all went to the same high School that the younger kids go to.

Tengen and Gyomei went to separate schools.

Sanemi had a small crush on Kanae during his high school years.

Giyuu and Shinobu shortly dated before finding out they were both gay. However, they continued to play date because they didn't want to come out.

Rengoku set Obanai and Mitsuri up when they were in year 10. They've been datingg ever since.

Sanemi and Obanai used to get detention quite often since they misbehaved. Giyuu also got detention but because he skipped many lessons. Thos caused Obanai and Sanemi to dislike him and think that he didn't value his education and must have thought he was better then it. Giyuu on the other hand just didn't enjoy sitting in the classrooms due to how anxious it made him, and would do his work on his own somewhere else.

Giyuu didn't have many friends as he kept to himself and skipped many lessons.

Shinobu and Mitsuri became good friends in year 9, Shinobu had a little crush on her but quickly got over it when Mitsuri and Obanai started dating.

In Tengens school, no one believed him when he said he had three girlfriends because they each went to different schools. That was until he took all three of them to his prom. It was pretty flashy.

A picture diagram to show how the friend group came to be and how they all are linked.

Ships (maybe):

Sanemi X Giyuu (but it's like subtleish)

Tengen X Suma X Hinatsuru X Makio

Mitsuri X Obanai

Tanjiro X Kanao

Kanae X Tsutako

[twoa-plus]

dissecting stanford pines and finding organs that don’t exist but like in a metaphorical way

that’s it that’s the title i’m going with. this is a long one folks o7

most of this isn’t sourced or canon at all it’s just personal interpretation/headcanon/whatever else u wanna call it, but!! since more people are seeing my deranged gravity falls ramblings now i figure i should probably give some perspective as to why i like/defend ford as much as i do

(in my other gf posts i do try to stick to canon to back up whatever point i’m making - this is just about my personal opinion of ford as a character, and should be able to be thrown out in regards to my other posts)

so for some background/setup/whatever (it’s important i promise bear with me), different people have different instinctual responses to anxiety/stress. i come from a family (genetics are fun) where the default response is to start (metaphorically ofc) biting and hissing like a cornered animal. this doesn’t necessarily mean there’s any actual hatred or malice or anything towards the people that end up getting scratched - they might just be at the wrong place at the wrong time, they might’ve done something super minor and insignificant that added on to a preexisting pile of stress, etc etc

i cannot stress enough that i am not saying this is ok. you dont need me to tell you that hurting people who don’t deserve it is a bad thing, lol. what i am saying though is that sometimes people can kind of suck for reasons other than just genuinely wanting everyone around them to be miserable

this is the last “background” part i swear BUT another thing thats less genetic and more just me being weird is that i’m the type of person where like. any minor environmental change can really stress me out lol. like even just reorganizing my desk can be pretty emotionally taxing

SO. finally back on topic. stanford pines. i see a lot of the behavior/patterns i just described in him. like i’ve spent my entire life around people like this, and while i understand why a lot of people see him as just some asshole, i can’t help but see him as a guy who’s just kinda going through it lol

just talking about the more recent events as of the series, he’s just spent 30 years god knows where doing and seeing god knows what, he has an abusive ex who wants to murder him and his entire family (plus the whole dimension, really), and in the three decades he’s been gone the entire world - including his own house - has changed and left him behind. add onto that that he went missing in 1982, way before we had all of the emotional/mental health resources we have now, we all saw what the stans’ childhood was like, and that ford is terrible with people - including, imo, himself. if there’s anybody out there who would have Feelings and not understand what they are or where they’re coming from or what to do about them, it’s this guy

this entire setup is the perfect circumstance for fear and anxiety and stress and uncertainty to all get translated into anger. a really big example of this, to me, is how he talks about dipper in journal 3. i’ve talked about this before somewhere so i’ll try to summarize as fast as i can lol

reading his initial entry about dipper would make u think he like. hates this kid lol. but i really don’t think he ever did - he was really excited to meet the kids in the show and already seemed to care about them just by virtue of existing, and his opinion on dipper in journal 3 seems to do a complete 180 pretty quickly which ,,, doesn’t really fit ford as a character. like i love the man but that guy can hold a GRUDGE

here’s how it reads to me:

ford gets back to his home dimension after 30 years and everything is different

he’s subconsciously kind of struggling with the fact that he doesn’t really have a “home” anymore - the sense of familiarity and comfort that would normally come with the word is gone. (i specify that it’s subconscious because, like i said earlier, i do not get the vibe that he’s particularly aware of his own emotions)

he finds out that journal 3 - something he made with his own two hands and considers part of his life’s work - has also changed in the decades he’s been gone. this adds to the feeling of unfamiliarity with the world around him

it’s easier to blame that “final straw” and say that he’s just upset about his work being tampered with rather than address the actual root of the problem, so that’s exactly what he does. this still doesn’t mean that there’s any genuine hatred towards dipper. anger in the moment, yeah, but not hatred

again, this is entirely personal interpretation, and i completely understand if u don’t see it like this!! this is just a pattern of thoughts/behavior that i’m very familiar with, so it’s easy for me to apply it to situations like this even if it’s not really part of the canon

i also think there’s a big problem in this fandom with just ,, not seeing ford as a Person with Emotions? idk how to explain it but it feels like people expect him to always know exactly what to do in every situation just bc he’s old and academically smart. like whenever another character does something objectively bad it’s “well there were extenuating circumstances,” (which is usually true and i agree !!) but ford never really seems to get that treatment. if he does something bad it’s just because he sucks

a big example of this i think is the fight between him and stan (y’know the “you ruined my life”/“you ruined your own life”). you cannot look me dead in the eyes and, in full seriousness, with the context of everything ford was going through with bill at the time, say that he was fully mentally/emotionally stable during that conversation. “oh so you’re blaming stan-“ NO!!! stan was also going through it!!! that’s the entire point - they’re both people with their own lives and emotions and everything else that comes with that, they had very human reactions to their respective situations, and they both ended up hurt!! hopefully i’m explaining this right but i just don’t like it when people pin everything on ford, like there was a lot going on and at the end of the day he’s just a human

wasn’t really sure how to work this in so i’ll just put it here - i don’t think ford ever truly hated stan, either. familial bonds are complicated, and there can be a whole lot of anger towards someone without true hatred being present. i briefly mentioned the stans’ childhood sucking earlier, and i don’t just mean stanley - it’s easier to pinpoint him as a victim of abuse/neglect, but that doesn’t mean ford had it great either. their parents (specifically filbrick, but caryn didn’t exactly do a fantastic job with them either) expected nothing of stan and the world of ford, both of which would weigh heavily on any child. plus, ford being the favorite doesn’t mean all of his emotional needs were met - filbrick seeing him as an opportunity to make money doesn’t mean he was suddenly an emotionally present and caring father towards him. WCT wasn’t just an opportunity for ford to go be a famous scientist or whatever - it was a chance for his father to love him, something both of the stans desperately wanted. (WCT was also on the opposite side of the country from where they lived but i’m sure that’s completely unrelated !!!)

do i think stan deserved anything that happened to him after the science fair incident? no, absolutely not, he was a child. do i think it was right of ford to just stand there as his brother got thrown out? no, absolutely not - but he was a child too. as for them not speaking for a decade after that, like i mentioned earlier ford can hold a grudge like no other. (this doesn’t just apply to stan, either, ford dedicated half of his life to trying to kill his ex lmao.) i think ford’s ability to hold on to anger like that is actually a pretty major part of/flaw in his personality, but again, anger - even the strongest, most long-lived of it - is not synonymous with hatred. stan, who ford has always gone to for help when he truly needed it, it not what ford’s hatred looks like. bill, who ford actively wants to die, is

anyways!! i never know how to close these things lol. ig in summary i just see ford’s behavior (in the show at least) as more of a sign of internal struggle rather than like ,, genuinely hating the people around him and wanting their lives to suck. did/does he have an ego problem? absolutely. is he incapable of love and human connection? no. is he immune to manipulation/abuse/neglect/etc and everything that comes with that? also no

he’s an interdimensional criminal why can’t he go to the theraprism. i think he should

[sakuraharuno156]

Why Sakura Haruno is literally the best written character in Naruto - a rant.

She is the epitome of Narutos meaning.

So, main question is, what is Naruto about? On most surfaces level - about fox-boy having adventures, but that's not why most of us fell in love with the story. Below fox-boy, was fighting against your odds, learning, failing, getting back up, trying and becoming stronger, and most importantly about this quote:

"You dont have to be born a genius, you can become one".

This is what Naruto was about.

Arc with Haku and Zabuza? Find someone worth fighting for and become stronger for that person.

Chunnin exams? Naruto gives his all against Neji, to prove him, that you don't have to be born special, you can become special.

3rd Hokage vs Orochimaru - will of fire, that pushes you to protect your family, will keep the village alive.

Naruto vs Gaara - you can be hated and ignored all your life for your weakness, but if you keep trying people will notice you.

And so on and do forth.

But then we learned that Naruto was born to hokage and an Uzumaki. He got shit ton of chakra and a LITERAL beast in him to protect him. He was born great and to be great.

He failed his own narrative.

Menwhile Sakura was born a civilian, a noone, no magic eyes, no beast to help, no clan to learn from, nothing. She was an annoying girl with no aspiration. Thats it. Everything else she has is just her hard work and dedication. She become stronger than most of people "born great", just by trying to help people she cares about.

She is everything Naruto was set-up to be.

Is she a perfect person? No. And this is exactly what makes her a perfect character.

She's is flawed, she's sometimes emotional, she's not always confident and not always THE BEST BECAUSE PLOT.

SHE IS THE MOST HUMAN AND THE MOST INSPIRING.

And its annoying af when people dont understand her character, because that shows they didn't understand the story AT ALL.

She did her best and made mistakes but grown because of them.

Oh i was weak and couldn't protect my friends when they needed me? I'll do my best now, and try to be better next time.

She didn't give up and decided "well I'm weak so I'll stay that way". She trained under the strongest kunoichi of her time, who was beating her till she was unconscious and had many of her bones broken, because "Tsunade can heal her later".

Sakura from beginning would just give up, because 1) why bother when she can be pretty and 2) it hurts and takes time so it's easier to give up.

But she has grown.

AND THE WORST OF ALL IS that she gets shit for everything Naruto is praised for.

Naruto is understanding Sasuke and wants him to be back - great friend.

Sakura does the same (she understands him even more in first part- she is the only one who know that Sasuke is about to leave the village)- delusional SIMP (even when it was stated in manga that she didn't want him to herself, she wanted to safe him).

Naruto throws himself into fight he has no chance in to be a distraction - WOW SO SMART. HE IS GREAT.

Sakura does the same - weak. Delusional.

Naruto is always getting help during fights - he wins by himself.

Sakura gets bit of help from Chiyo (even when Chiyo stated herself that Sakura didn't need her) - WELL SHE DID NOTHING, IT WAS CHIYOS FIGHT.

Naruto is rude to everyone, BUT GROWS FROM IT- he was just a kid, that doesn't matter. He is a different person now.

Sakura was rude to someone, qpologies and grows from it - ITS UNFORGETTABLE. SHES A B*TCH.

What you all expected her to do?

- She is weak! - she became strong. BUT NOT AS STRONG AS THE STRONGEST, so its shit.

- She's rude to Naruto and made fun of a orphan - she was one of first people who cared about Naruto and opened a clinic for children's mental health - BUT WHEN SHE WAS 12 SHE SAID BAD THING SO STILL A B*TCH.

- She couldn't help Naruto and Sasuke in forests of death - she became a healer - BUT SHE DIDN'T HEAL EVERYONE EVERYTIME.

- She is useless - she isn't, she saved many people (including Naruto), and was especially useful during pain invasion - BUT WHEN NOONE COULD DO A THING AGAINST PAIN SHE COULDN'T ALSO SO SHES TRASH.

She gets trashed for things other people do and noone even bats an eye.

- But she punched Naruto! - so did Guy to Lee but you love them both and their relationship.

I've never seen someone call guy "abusive".

- But she was mean to Naruto! - so was everyone else, but I've never seen them risk their life to safe Naruto or his dream.

- But she only cares about Sasuke - no, no she doesn't, she cares for MANY PEOPLE like Naruto, Shikamaru ect. She even takes Naruto's side against Sasuke.

She also did many shitty things, don't get me wrong (like fight against Ino, I think she needed this to bloom, but it was indeed shit behavior), but so did everyone else.

Example - Naruto:

TALKING LIKE THAT TO A CHILD WHO LOST ALMOST EVERYTHING????? UNFORGETTABLE. RIGHT? Right?

About people like Sasuke, Gaara, Hinata, Neji, 3rd Hokage ect. I'm not going to talk because it will be material for whole different posts and it's already getting too long.

In summary:

You all are just Nejis from chunnin exams.

"Either you are born perfect or die a failure."

You all are just villagers form beginning of the series.

"WELL SOMEONE DID A BAD THINGS AT THE BEGINNING AND WAS WEAK SO I HATE THEM"

You all didn't understand Naruto as a story at all.

She is a perfect character form Naruto's definition - a noone who became important.

[3-2-whump]

Caretaker Profiles

Hey, so it just occurred to me that I never made one of these in the whole time that Eternal ran (oops), so I'm gonna fix that now!

Nico Clemenza is a gate guard in his mid-twenties. He has short dark brown hair that looks intentionally styled to be messy, green eyes, and scrabbly facial hair. He's built thick and athletic due to his time as high school football captain, and he's got a certain golden retriever energy about him. Loyal to the Costa Family and to the Boss, Nico wouldn't like to rock the boat too much, but then he made friends with the Boss' intern. They saw each other every day as Thomas came and left the grounds, but he finally worked up the balls to talk to the new intern one day during lunch. He is one of those people who wouldn’t question the lies and cover stories his superiors give him, but one too many details start not adding up, and he becomes concerned for his new friend’s well-being. Nico eventually comes face to face with the truth and becomes disillusioned in his family, his work, and the Costas. Now, he has to decide what to do with this crushing realization all while trying to help Khaled as much as he can.

Julio Lazaro Estrada is a Latin American man with light olive skin covered in tattoos, dark hair that he bleaches and dyes sometimes, hazel cat-like eyes, and some patchy facial hair. He’s very tall and skinny because of a stupid high metabolism. He has crooked fingers from his time in jail (see tragic backstory), and he has quite a few piercings and tattoos. He is the young boss of Juicio Divino -Divine Judgment in English- an Afro-Latino gang that challenges the Costas for territory. He and Thomas Costa go way back; before he was resigned to be a contracted killer, Julio had a promising future as a music student, but due to meddling and underhanded business on Thomas’ part, Julio ended up in jail, where he met Isidro Bautista and was absorbed into the shady underworld of contract killing. (Although Julio redefines and holds onto his own moral compass despite all the blood on his hands.) He adores Khaled and wants to free him from the man who (supposedly) single-handedly ruined his life, but Julio does not know how to best handle his feelings for Khaled while keeping his own emotional health in check. He is best known for his confident demeanor and warm familiarity, often calling people vato or some other nickname.

Le Tag List: @kabie-whump @rainydaywhump @whumped-by-glitter @skittles-the-whumpee @generic-whumperz

@bamber344 @there-will-always-be-blood @morning-star-whump @a-la-whump @watermelons-dont-grow-on-trees

@defire @phoenixpromptsandstuff @scumashling

[oetscop]

hey! absolutely love your art and your rainer interpretation- can you talk about your headcanons lore-wise involving rainer and mike? honestly you can talk about more than just those two as well i'm very curious about your interpretations honestly.

YOOO I LOVE UR RAINER ALSO thank u.....

this will hopefully not be complete word salad. bc my brains fried already, but my views on petscop characters are esoteric and best and downright incomprehensible at worst. so idk how legible this will be JDKSHSKSBSK

uhh ill start with like. jill is significantly older than anna and lina. rainers actually fairly close in age to anna.

rainers biological dad isnt in the picture and actually went missing a few years after him and jill divorced. it runs in the family i guess. but since tom was there longer hes only ever called him dad, and both jill and him took the last name hammond when they got married. and mike was actually an accident! a welcome one tho. jill and tom were in their 40s and rainer was like 16 or so.

they were very close tho! he was very close with his immediate family. for the brief time he was in college he still lived at home despite the commute.

mike would sit and watch him work on the game all the time. he wanted him to teach him how to code (thats why he created the "petscop kids" after school program! at first anyway...) but 5-6 year olds dont exactly have the attention span for explaining how the dev kit console works. unless theyre belle i guess. but he did get into art! and considering rainers also an artist he encouraged it. mike would sometimes draw his own pets to be put in the game, but since it never went past evencare they never showed up. he did sorta base toneth on mike, and that was before he based any of the other pets on other family members.

mike went missing shortly after rainers mental health was declining. he ran away after some argument with his mom, and nobody remembers what the argument was even about. since this was after marvin hit the dog with the car, and he was beginning to experience psychosis, he immediately made the connection and believed marvin had something to do with it. the cops found it a little suspicious that rainer somehow just knew he had been struck by a car, and he was the only suspect for quite a while. tom had to vouch for him pretty hard and get him a lawyer.

as for vaguer things. the newmaker plane was started in an attempt to find out where mike wouldve run to. he was already recording movements in game, so he put all of mikes in game behaviors into a to scale version of their town, trying to train it to show him where he couldve gone. this obviously didnt work. didnt help that it was completely flat terrain and like had only their house, the marks house, the school and like a couple roads. it actually lead him to the opposite side of the town than where his body was located.

marvin is ALSO severely mentally ill and was convinced that care was lina reborn before any of this happened. obviously anna didnt believe that since shes still. yknow. alive. but rainer introduced the A/B/NLM concept to him, and they both began to believe care was just lina A reborn. pre traumatic event lina. they were both trying to see if they could somehow force something like that to occur, in an attempt to bring mike A back. when belle didnt work, they figured she was too old, so they moved to care. part of this whole "changing your past" thing involved plucking out her eyebrows (lina A had trich) and essentially trying to reenact aforementioned traumatic event. thats why marvin kidnapped her to keep her in the school. and it didnt work! just traumatized the fuck outta the kid. they never had the chance to do anything to "bring mike back" by the end of it, which lead to Bathroom Tomb Event. however, last belle heard, he was pretty certain paul was actually mike A. she tried her best to keep that from paul before they became distant.

i feel like the core of a lot of this is that i really dont believe that the rebirthing process does anything at all. with enough manipulation you may start developing false memories, sure, but its not actually working. in retrospect it makes rainers character a lot sadder. just a terrified kid trying in vain to bring his baby brother back. its not easy losing someone so young in such a horrible way without knowing who took his life.

BUT UUHHH YEAH ^}^ can you tell ive been thinking abt petscop pretty much nonstop since the end of 2022 i bet you cant

[noemitenshi]

Troy Otto x Alicia Clark s8 AU - Their story up to s8

Short recap: Troy finds Alicia almost dying after s7 and nurses her back to health.

THEY STAY TOGETHER because they are both alone. On their own. They’ve both lost their people. They stay together because of their shared memories of cherished people - not because they like one another. This, will come too, with time. But not yet. It’s not what keeps them together.

THE FIRST TIME Alicia wants to help people troy is all “lets go alicia” trying to get her away from them and shes all “no. they’re hurt. we’re helping them” and hes like “not a good idea. dont have the resources. dont know if they’re a danger” and she probably goes “Im not going” and hes like “thats ok ill carry you away” like thats the problem. and she goes “why are you like this. you helped me too” “yeah, i knew you. i dont know these people. lets go. now” (obviously they’re not going. Or well, Alicia tells him he can go if he likes, she’s staying. And grudgingly he stays too because he’s not about to leave her on her own with unfamiliar faces.)

THE NEXT FEW TIMES she does this, wanting to help people, they are constantly arguing about it. At some point Alicia probably even goes “it’s what mom would’ve wanted.” (She knows it’s complicated, Troy’s relationship with Madison but she kinda banks on the good parts winning out. him wanting to please her, still. Or at least that he’ll be turned soft because… it’s her mom’s wish (she does suspect about Troy having a soft spot for moms in general)). But he just goes “oh yeah? and where’s madison now, huh?” “youre such a dick you know that” “yeah, i know. lets go” (again, they are obviously not going)

AT SOME POINT Alicia notices that Troy is actually helping her even though his words are still unkind - he still insists on leaving the people behind. She notices there’s no bite in it, anymore. She humors him, replying in kind. He notices (was it the slight hesitation? Can he hear it in her tone? She’s not sure) and a grin splits his face. She decides she likes him like this.

THEY GROW COMFORTABLE around one another. In this way where they really know the other. They know what sets the other off, know how to get them through a rough patch, what makes them laugh. And they are there for one another (because for a while that is all they have). They become good friends – even though they still fight, too. Alicia hasn’t forgiven him for what he did back at the ranch (he didn’t apologize for it because he knows she wouldn’t buy it anyway) – but they did manage to move past it.

THERE’S LOVE THERE between them. Not romantic love but a deep platonic one. They have to rely on one another, they saved one another countless times when one of them was in a tight spot. They saw the other at their most vulnerable – they other has been there for their most vulnerable. How can there not be love? There’s such ease and trust between them. They might not love one another as a conventional romantic couple – but they *are* family.

THEY’RE AS INTIMATE as two people only can be, emotionally. And it spills over to the physical side. Alicia makes the first move. It starts out awkward but not for long; they *do* have chemistry. They both enjoy this new way of expressing themselves (of ending fights, too) quite a lot.

THEIR CHILD wasn’t planned. Neither one of them would consciously bring a child into this world (not with one another). When Alicia tells Troy he goes “oh shit” and laughs for five minutes straight (at himself for having forgotten about birth control. At the both of them. At the whole situation he couldn’t even have conceived while living on the ranch.). She does not share his amusement.

THEY DON’T CALL HER TRACY. Maybe Maddy though (and yes, that is her full name. Maddy Clark. Troy wasn’t happy about it, of course, but as it was important to Alicia he decided to concede that point. In fact, Alicia told him in no uncertain terms that when he was the one growing their child in his belly, would push it out of his vagina, he could also name it whatever he damn well pleased. He doubted this was true – though didn’t argue that point. Arguing with pregnant Alicia was a minefield not even he dared to brave (often)).

ALICIA STILL DIES like Serena did, while trying to help people. She was out alone because someone had to watch Maddy. (Troy *only once* suggested this is her job as the mom. It went over as well as you’d expect)

DISCOVERING MADISON IS ALIVE has Troy deciding he needs to have words with her. It was *her philosophy* after all that got his best friend killed. That cost Maddy her mom. Righteous fury burns in him.

HE ACTUALLY BURIED ALICIA unlike Serena in s8. But still plays mindgames with Madison and is cutting off walkers' arms (mostly because I think he was so funny for this)

Find part 1 here

[luvstruckmutt]

RANT ABOUT PEOPLES WEIRD ATTITUDE ABOUT SHANE STARDEW VALLEY INCOMING!!!

saw people complaining about shane today and saying he is a bad and awful husband and they divorced him after seeing his room and that he becomes boring after he starts getting therapy because the interesting thing about him is his struggle with addiction and after you "fix him" what's the point of being with him And just?? Why?? Did you even marry him?? Like?? I dunno, people are allowed to have opinions on characters but so many peoples' opinions are just?? Really bad and rooted deeply in ableism and misconceptions about mental health/addiction and are super saviory??

I have said this a thousand times but you can't fix people. That's literally not how people work. You can, however, be there for people and try and create a safe environment for them to be able to help themselves!! AND THATS EXACTLY EHAT FUCKING HAPPEMS IN STARDEW!! Shane gets help ON HIS OWN because he is being supported by both his family and the farmer. And to see that just fucking fly over peoples heads makes me so mad because DID WE PLAY THE SAME FUCLING GAME?? YOU DONT FIX SHIT!! YOU ACT AS PART OF A SUPPORT SYSTEM!! (Which is very important but like) YOU AS A SINGULAR PERSON CANT FIX PEOPLE!!

I also just hate the "I can fix them" attitude because, at least in this specific situation, the people saying this are the same people who divorce him because his room is ugly or because he is implied to relapse and still is depressed??? It feels like the same thing as when someone has "spread kindness!" or "love each other!" in their bio and then is the most rancid hateful person ever? The room thing in particular makes me mad because LIKE WHAT DID YUOU THINK IT WAS GOING TO LOOK LIKE?? YOU SAW HIS ROOM AT MARNIE'S, WHAT MADE YOU THINK HIS ROOM IN YOUR HOUSE WAS GOING TO BE ORGANIZED AND SPOTLESS???

Idk like, again, you can dislike Shane and even regret marrying him. He's not very nice to you until you really get his hearts up there so he comes off as rude and abrasive. You don't HAVE TO LIKE HIM!! But so many people just spout hateful shit and it's like god, I hope you never have anyone in your life who suffers from mental illness because even though Shane is a video game character, the stuff you're saying and the ideas you have surrounding addiction and mental health are super toxic and weird and I hope no real person ever has to be subjected to them.

edit (put this in the tags but then wanted to add it to the main post):

[calebwittebane]

hashtag personal Might Seem Crazy What Im About To Say but part of why ive been doing so badly lately is that uh my father has been legit dying. cirrhosis and pancreatitis and blood vessel blockages in his legs so guy can barely walk. and he has been refusing treatment because 1. hes a moron 2. he has medical trauma from his childhood. and well if all else were equal id probably be able to make some peace with it, i mean ive got my own stuff going on, and i dont owe him anything after all that he put me through, and hes not in my life right now and i want it to stay that way. except all else is not equal because theres the fact that my sibling, like, actually has a decent relationship with him and loves him and has been freaking out about this. i really hate to see them go through this. they deserve to have a dad and this fucking sucks. being sick and in pain has been taking a toll on his mental health as well and hes been acting weird and really irritable and its been rly hurtful to them. so like. this sucks a whole fucking lot. and i feel so bad in ways that seem impossible to address and, you know, make me feel physically ill because its him. and i feel like i should use some of that leverage i might have rn to call him and tell him to get his shit together and get treatment. but i Dont Fucking Want To. i dont want to speak to that man but at the same time i really feel the need to even if it doesnt end up working. but besides it not working its possible that hes going to react in some crazy way. like if he finds out that i know about his current state and that if i worry enough he can get me to contact him. god fucking dammit man this is making me go insane. i cannnnt do this like i cant cope with this. and i already know if i asked anyone from my family for advice itd just be the default Of Course You Should Call Him, Now Is The Time To Bury The Hatchet and thatd be so thoroughly unhelpful. i cant do this lol 😃 i cant fucking cope with this 😁

[wh0refornikolailantsov]

"The shame of it was they both loved each other, but they were both too young to know how to love."

Wylan x Reader

Something About Timing - Wylan Van Eck

Content Warnings: Discussions Of Loss And Family Trauma. Not Beta/Proof Read.

You hand Wylan the nitrate in the blue vial and he smiles at you, you cannot read the musical notes he has coded onto all his chemicals but you have learned to recognise what he is asking for by your own colour and consistency system. You've not been wrong yet, thankfully.

"So, your parents, they weren't from Kerch originally?" Wylan asks. In times like these, when it's just the two of you, and you're putting things together, just at work, gently in one another's company, you tend to start talking about these kinds of things. The type of things you don't tend to get around to talking about with the others. When you're around the others, things seem to be happening all the time and all at once, but with Wylan things can slow down, things go at a steady pace. You feel like you can breathe again.

"No, they lived in Ravka, my mothers parents lived in the isle for a time, my family have really travelled a little of everywhere," you explain.

"So you ended up in Ketterdam because of a whim?" He is curious, he always seems curious about you, like he could ask question upon question just to hear you talk about yourself, learning what there is to learn. It's one of the softer things about Wylan, something you hope his time in the barrel won't drag out of him.

"Not exactly, we ended up in Kerch on a whim, mother wanted... she had places to see," you stumble over your sentence slightly but keep yourself going. "But when my father got ill, they wanted to travel somewhere warm, thinking the weather might improve his health, but they barely made it out the harbour. I was supposed to be staying in Kerch to finish my semester at school, but as soon as the ship went down, I didn't have much attention for school. So I made my way to Ketterdam, and then to the barrel," you wave your arms to signal to the room around you, "and to here."

"I'm sorry," Wylan says quietly, "losing my mother was exceptionally difficult, I can't imagine the grief of losing two parents at once."

"You know your own kind of grief, you grieve both your parents, but for different reasons and in different ways," you reply. "My parents problem was they loved like it was finite, like it was running out. And I suppose it's good they did, as their time was a lot shorter than it should have been. But I can't help but feel that their rushing everything was a part of the reason. They rushed from place to place from thing to thing, insistent on seeing everything there was, doing all there is to do, loving like the day was ending too soon."

"At least they loved each other," Wylan says, "they had that, and they had you."

"They loved eachother alright, I remember that much about them," you say, leaning back against a counter. "The shame of it was they both loved each other, but they were both too young to know how to love."

"I like to remember my father loving my mother," Wylan says, "but these days I'm not sure how much of that is truth and how much is wishful thinking."

"Its not wrong, you know, wishing your father was different, grieving the parent he could have been, he should have been, the parent you deserved," you tell him.

Wylan pulls his breath in shakily. "So you think your parents were too young to be in love?" He asks.

"Not exactly," you let him slide the topic away from his father, not wanting to push him, "I think love isn't about age. I've known people younger than us in love and I've known it was true, they meant it. But my parents, they did not have the wisdom to match their years, they loved all heart and no..."

"Head?" He asks. You shake yours gently.

"I dont believe love needs to be thought out, falling in love with an inconvenient person is sometimes half the joy of love, finding it where it shouldnt be, where you would never go looking for it," you pull your eyes away from his, not wanting to absentmindedly search his eyes to look for something that might not be there, "but if you love with all heart and no rhythm to beat to, a heart can only sustain itself so long without failing."

"You talk like Nina sometimes," he says.

"Nina knows heart, she knows heart and body and soul, she knows love and biology," you say, "she can smell love like a bloodhound. She will see it in you before you've gotten the chance to. I'm honoured to sound like Nina."

"You sound like someone who has been called out by her," he smiles to himself.

"Well I may be able to lie, but the heart, heart gives itself away," you admit, and your heart has not truly been your own for a time now. You hadn't noticed at first, it had crept away from you, slowly, without making a sound until one day you woke up and your heart did not belong to you anymore.

Wylan steals a quick glance your way, there are so many thing he wants to say to you, but he doesn't know how to say them without laying his heart at your feet and hoping for the best. Love hasn't been kind to Wylan, not the love that was supposed to come easily, the love that was supposed to be natural, the love that was supposed to be unconditional. And when those who are supposed to love you regardless of your flaws, have treated you the way Wylan has been treated, the idea that people might choose to love you, might pick you and love you when there are reasons and options to not. It has made him doubtful. Hesistent. So instead he tries to gently pry open your thoughts, your feelings, seeing if he can see himself in them somehow. If he can sense his presence amongst those gentle smiles and soft words.

"And?" He asks, looking down at the mixture on the table.

"And?" You echo.

"The love that Nina called you out on," he says, trying to keep his hands from being too obvious in their fiddling, "how did that work out for you?"

You shrug, staring up at the ceiling. "Still waiting to find out," you breath, "he hasn't seemed to notice yet." His eyes dart to yours and away again but you can't help but smile, the corners of your lips up turning until the smirk is almost ear to ear. "But that's okay, I don't mind waiting," you say. "I think he will be worth it."

[sabaramonds]

long time no post CW for discussions of suicide & homophobia ahead as well as mentions of yunos sex work so in my periphery i see a lot of people saying 1. kazui hates yuno and 2. part of the reason why they seem themselves in one another is because kazui represses his sexuality while yuno is open about hers neither of these are true

you can dislike someone without hating them by virtue of being discomforted by the fact they are similar to you (self recognition through the eyes of the other (derogatory)) and. as for yuno being 'open' about her sexuality. well...i would say shes in tune with her own, but she isnt 'open' about it? unless es makes the details of each trial public among the prisoners (excluding the final judgement, of course) or she told people herself, nobody would know she does sex work. and i dont think shes told people, because why would she? what yuno and kazui recognize in each other isnt necessarily related to sexuality at all, but the masks they both wear and cant take off. neither of them can fully shed the facade they hide behind because to do so would result in a social death. they would, for different yet similar reasons, be stigmatized by their families and society at large. yeah, yuno says she comes from a supportive household (and this could be a lie. she could be lying.) but would that be true if her family found out she does sex work for whatever reason? not likely. and kazui has already said his family 'must find [me] embarrassing' upon being asked if theyre proud of him. if they discovered the truth of his sexuality in the aftermath of his wifes death (suicide?) then that would make sense, though if hinako killed herself then it could be theyre unaware of that truth and are ashamed of him for other reasons im a bit unsure about the current political climate re: suicide in japan (im saying this and you guys do not want to see the tabs i have open rn LOL) and how its viewed by the older generation in particular, but its generally tolerated, shamed, or honorable depending on the context. mental health issues are often ignored, particularly by older generations; to commit suicide to right an apparent wrong or repent (one form of which you all might be familiar with is seppuku) is looked at as a moral responsibility in some cases. so um. basically part of what im saying is that if hinako killed herself to escape the social fallout of not only potential divorce but also from having had a gay husband, she would be looked at with pity and empathy while kazui would be, of course, derided and considered a social pariah - if that is what happened and if it came to light. and, well, what do people think would happen if yuno, 18 years old, not even culturally an adult (until 2022, just last year, 20 was not only the traditional age of being considered an adult in japan but also legally - it was only last year that they made it legal to vote and sign up for loans and their own credit stuff without their parents backing them) and shes doing sex work. if it became public knowledge, her family would be devastated. she could get disowned, she could lose her social standing among friends, among other probable issues that could arise so what kazui and yuno see in one another isnt really related to sexuality at all. yuno looks at kazui and sees a man who has spent his whole lifetime hiding himself from not only the world but from his own self and she doesnt want that for herself; kazui looks at her and sees a girl who is hiding her honest self from everyone and in that he sees himself, which isnt helped by the fact she has subtly implied shes well aware of what it is he hides from the world like recognizes like etc. anyway thats all. double in is in like 2 weeks and i wont survive it

[the-blaze-empress]

1 RANDOM FACT ABOUT EACH OF YOUR OCS, GO!

(i didnt forget your ask it just made me go OCsmode <333) (if i sent this already NEW RANDOM FACTS LIST TIME!!!)

YAYYY HELLOO i am ALSO going to go ocsmode <3

Flykk - he plays the pan pipes!! pretty well actually. so well i nearly multiclassed him into bard instead of warlock, which. Everything That Happened Happened Because I Multiclassed Him To Warlock. and all i wanted out of the multiclass was more spellslots

Wroqq - he ended up getting a tattoo of the runes on flykk's sword that say 'for him'

Marigold - she's aroace and i love her for it. also plays the tambourine

V'nandi - she is incredibly selfish and she genuinely hates herself for it. she doesnt do anything much about it though except pretend she doesnt hate herself

Toast - she died happy. she apologised to solen after the fact and i think they made up, eventually

Zehan - takes incredibly thorough notes on everything ever. studies them frequently. about 75% of them arent actually useful but she has them

Ahfald - doesn't agree with the way Zehan was raised and is VERY glad theyre raising their child together away from all that

Cyerce - shes never actually spoken to her mother (thassa) and it worries her. shes the first child of thassa in centuries and she cant even connect with her

Yko - subject of a prophecy that terrifies him!! he's the prophesied saviour of his home and it put a massive target on his back when he was younger so he ran. he hasnt seen his family since

Jak - owns a deck of many things. stole it before they ran away from home. is yet to actually use it, mostly just. stares at it

Cora - gave up her last name and any ties to her family when she accepted the apprenticeship under the god of death. thats definitely the only reason she has no last name and not bc i hate coming up with last names

Cam - the curse turned all their hair white though not as a byproduct of the magic, as a byproduct of the stress it put/s their body under. theyve considered dying it back to brown but at first kept it white to remind them of what they did. it was a badge of shame. theyre slowly learning to like it

Mavis - she can stick her hands through the veil of life and death, but she cant go any further than this or itll kill her. really excellent for her dads' mental health to have a baby who is able to manipulate the veil. thankfully she hasnt tried to stuff it in her mouth yet

East - slightly sculky, but it doesnt affect her. she managed to survive it, though has since become a mildly chthonic harvest god since. we dont talk about the part of her that split off as a ghost

Vikt - kind of the unofficial leader of his people. he is not aware of this. he is also a recluse

Polias - his gold eyes are because of his position as a soldier in the radiant empire, and no they will not go away even though he's been thrown out for treason

Nott - actual name otana, derived from the ashok word for hope. she however thinks this is stupid and that 'nott' is a way cooler sounding name